ISSUE 016 MAY 2012 THEFIGHTMAG.COM
LOVE SPENT
One Man’s Intimate Confession
SAVING CALIFORNIA Anti-Gay Group’s New Campaign
PREPARING FOR PRIDE Queen Latifah, The Trevor Project
+
MANHATTAN BEACH ENTRAPMENT CONTROVERSY
WORLDS AWAY
AIDEN LESLIE ON OVERCOMING FAMILY TRAGEDY
www.egrifta.com
Actual patient living with HIV since 2000
You’VE woRkED To ConTRoL YouR HIV. now, TImE To woRk on YouR
HIV-RELATED EXCESS BELLY FAT. In two separate clinical trials of HIV-infected people with lipodystrophy, each lasting 6 months, EGRIFTA® (tesamorelin for injection) reduced HIV-related excess belly fat by an average of 18% in the first trial, and 14% in the may vary. On average, patients on EGRIFTA® did not lose weight. Like HIV, HIV-related excess belly fat is a chronic condition. In clinical studies: • People who used EGRIFTA® continuously for 1 year maintained their results over this time period • People who stopped taking EGRIFTA® after 6 months had their HIV-related excess belly fat come back EGRIFTA® is believed to work with your own body to produce natural growth hormone to reduce your excess belly fat.
Indication: EGRIFTA® is a daily injectable prescription medicine to reduce the excess abdominal fat in HIV-infected patients with lipodystrophy. Limitations of use: • The impact and safety of EGRIFTA® on cardiovascular health has not been studied • EGRIFTA® is not indicated for weight-loss management • It’s not known whether taking EGRIFTA® helps improve compliance with antiretroviral medications • EGRIFTA® is not recommended to be used in children Important Risk Information Do not use EGRIFTA® if you: • Have pituitary gland tumor, pituitary gland surgery, or other problems related to your pituitary gland • Have active cancer (either newly diagnosed or recurrent) or are receiving treatment for cancer • Are allergic to tesamorelin or any of the ingredients in EGRIFTA®, including mannitol or sterile water • Are pregnant or become pregnant Before using EGRIFTA,® tell your healthcare provider if you: • Have or have had cancer • Have diabetes • Are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed • Have kidney or liver problems • Have any other medical condition • Take prescription or non-prescription medicines, vitamins, or herbal supplements EGRIFTA® may cause serious side effects, including: • Serious allergic reaction. Stop using EGRIFTA® and get emergency help right away if you have any of the following symptoms: rash over your body, hives, swelling of your face or throat, shortness of breath or trouble breathing, fast heartbeat, feeling of faintness or fainting • Swelling (fluid retention). EGRIFTA® can cause swelling in some parts of your body. Call your healthcare provider if you have an increase in joint pain, or pain or numbness in your hands or wrist (carpal tunnel syndrome) • Increase in glucose (blood sugar) intolerance and diabetes 120127-102148 2/12
• Injection-site reactions, such as redness, itching, pain, irritation, bleeding, rash, and swelling. Change (rotate) your injection site to help lower your risk for injection-site reactions The most common side effects of EGRIFTA® include: • joint pain • numbness and pricking • pain in legs and arms • nausea • swelling in your legs • vomiting • muscle soreness • rash • tingling • itching EGRIFTA® will NOT cure HIV or lower your chance of passing HIV to others. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch or call 1-800-FDA-1088. Please see Consumer Brief Summary of EGRIFTA® on following page.
Ask your healthcare provider if EGRIFTA®, the first and only FDA-approved medicine for HIV-related excess belly fat, may be right for you. For more information, visit www.egrifta.com or call the AXIS Center at 1-877-714-AXIS (2947).
Consumer Brief Summary for EGRIFTA® (tesamorelin for injection) EGRIFTA® (eh-GRIF-tuh) (tesamorelin for injection) for subcutaneous use Read the Patient Information that comes with EGRIFTA® before you start to take it and each time you get a refill. There may be new information. This leaflet does not take the place of talking to your healthcare provider about your medical condition or your treatment. What is EGRIFTA®? • EGRIFTA® is an injectable prescription medicine to reduce the excess in abdominal
fat in HIV-infected patients with lipodystrophy. EGRIFTA® contains a growth hormone-releasing factor (GRF) • The impact and safety of EGRIFTA® on cardiovascular health has not been studied • EGRIFTA® is not indicated for weight-loss management • It is not known whether taking EGRIFTA® helps improve compliance with antiretroviral medications • It is not known if EGRIFTA® is safe and effective in children. EGRIFTA® is not recommended to be used in children Who should not use EGRIFTA®? Do not use EGRIFTA® if you: • have pituitary gland tumor, pituitary gland surgery, or other problems related to your pituitary gland • have active cancer (either newly diagnosed or recurrent) or are receiving treatment for cancer • are allergic to tesamorelin or any of the ingredients in EGRIFTA®. See the end of this leaflet for a complete list of ingredients in EGRIFTA® • are pregnant or become pregnant. If you become pregnant, stop using EGRIFTA® and talk with your healthcare provider. See “What should I tell my healthcare provider before using EGRIFTA®?” What should I tell my healthcare provider before using EGRIFTA®? Before using EGRIFTA®, tell your healthcare provider if you: • have or have had cancer • have diabetes • are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. It is not known if EGRIFTA® passes into your breast milk. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommends that HIV-infected mothers not breastfeed to avoid the risk of passing HIV infection to your baby. Talk with your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby if you are taking EGRIFTA® • have kidney or liver problems • have any other medical condition Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including prescription and nonprescription medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. EGRIFTA® may affect the way other medicines work, and other medicines may affect how EGRIFTA® works. Know the medicines you take. Keep a list with you to show your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine. How should I use EGRIFTA®? • Read the detailed “Instructions for Use” that comes with EGRIFTA® before you start
using EGRIFTA®. Your healthcare provider will show you how to inject EGRIFTA® • Use EGRIFTA® exactly as prescribed by your healthcare provider • Inject EGRIFTA® under the skin (subcutaneously) of your stomach area (abdomen) • Change (rotate) the injection site on your stomach area (abdomen) with each dose.
– hives – swelling of your face or throat – shortness of breath or trouble breathing – fast heartbeat – feeling of faintness or fainting • Swelling (fluid retention). EGRIFTA® can cause swelling in some parts of your body. Call your healthcare provider if you have an increase in joint pain, or pain or numbness in your hands or wrist (carpal tunnel syndrome) • Increase in glucose (blood sugar) intolerance and diabetes. Your healthcare provider
will measure your blood sugar periodically • Injection-site reactions. Change (rotate) your injection site to help lower your risk for
injection-site reactions. Call your healthcare provider for medical advice if you have the following symptoms around the area of the injection site: – redness – bleeding – rash – itching – swelling – pain – irritation The most common side effects of EGRIFTA® include: – nausea – joint pain – vomiting – pain in legs and arms – rash – swelling in your legs – itching – muscle soreness – tingling, numbness, and pricking Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effect that bothers you or that does not go away. These are not all the possible side effects of EGRIFTA®. For more information, ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist. Call your healthcare provider for medical advice about side effects. To report side effects, contact EMD Serono toll-free at 1-800-283-8088, ext. 5563. You may report side effects to the FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088. Keep EGRIFTA® and all medicines out of the reach of children. General information about the safe and effective use of EGRIFTA®: Medicines are sometimes prescribed for purposes other than those listed in a Patient Information leaflet. Do not use EGRIFTA® for a condition for which it was not prescribed. Do not give EGRIFTA® to other people, even if they have the same symptoms you have. It may harm them. Do not share your EGRIFTA® syringe with another person, even if the needle is changed. Do not share your EGRIFTA® needles with another person. This Patient Information leaflet summarizes the most important information about EGRIFTA®. If you would like more information, talk with your healthcare provider. You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for information about EGRIFTA® that is written for healthcare professionals. For more information about EGRIFTA®, go to www.EGRIFTA.com or contact the AXIS Center toll-free at 1-877-714-2947. What are the ingredients in EGRIFTA®? Active ingredient: tesamorelin Inactive ingredients: mannitol and Sterile Water for Injection
Do not inject EGRIFTA® into scar tissue, bruises, or your navel • Do not share needles or syringes with other people. Sharing of needles can result in
the transmission of infectious diseases, such as HIV What are the possible side effects of EGRIFTA®? EGRIFTA® may cause serious side effects including: • Serious allergic reaction. Some people taking EGRIFTA® may have an allergic reaction. Stop using EGRIFTA® and get emergency help right away if you have any of the following symptoms: – a rash over your body
© 2012 EMD Serono, Inc. 120120-161843 2/12 All rights reserved. EGRIFTA® is a registered trademark of Theratechnologies Inc. Distributed by EMD Serono, Inc., Rockland, MA 02370
COVER STORIES AND FEATURES 20
PREPARING FOR PRIDE
21
ENTRAPMENT CONTROVERSY
22
COVER PHOTOGRAPHY RICK DAY rickdaynyc.com
Queen Latifa in Long Beach
Center Protests Police Treatment
SAVING CALIFORNIA
ISSUE 016 MAY 2012 THEFIGHTMAG.COM
LOVE SPENT
One Man’s Intimate Confession
Anti-Gay Group’s New Campaign
SAVING CALIFORNIA
24
WHEN IT DOESN’T GET BETTER
PREPARING FOR PRIDE
26
WORLDS AWAY
28
LGBT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
Another Tragic Teen Suicide
Emerging Pop Artist Aiden Leslie
Myths and Misconceptions
30
WHEN SEX ISN’T ENOUGH
34
STRAIGHT ALLIES
One Man’s Intimate Confession
Anti-Gay Group’s New Campaign
Queen Latifah, The Trevor Project
+
MANHATTAN BEACH ENTRAPMENT CONTROVERSY
WORLDS AWAY
AIDEN LESLIE ON OVERCOMING FAMILY TRAGEDY
Celebrities Speak Out On Gay Rights
2024263034 THE COLUMNS 14
THE STATE California “Ex-Gay” Therapy Bill
16
THE CITY Protecting Transgender Suspects
18
THE ROSTOW REPORT Father McVeigh’s Conundrum
29
THE MIND Dr. Philip Pierce
32
THE EPIDEMIC HIV Prevention Pill
37
THE PETS Doggie Styles Beverly Hills
38
THE FAMILY LGBT Fertility Law Group
40
THE CALENDAR Events, Groups, Dave Davenport
42
THE FINAL FIGHT Obama’s Closet
THEFIGHT
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ay people as children experience everything from overt traumas to the covert and deadly silence of non-regard and non-mirroring around their budding gay sensibilities,” states WeHo Based psychotherapist Thomas Mondragon, in his article “When Sex Isn’t Enough,” in this issue, page 30. “These are forms of emotional and sexual abuse for gay boys rooted in the narrow confines of the compulsory heterosexism that all children are subject to,” says Mondragon. “Yet much of childhood development is driven by sexuality as a drive that too often gets mired in shame and confusion resulting in self-hatred and low self-esteem.” “When we have a gay-centered approach to the meaning of gay male erotic desire and love we can see that early on as a child, the young gay boy is in need of affirming and understanding parenting that would honor, encourage, and validate the transformational potential of having a gay personality,” states Mondragon. Imagine what would have happened, suggests Mondragon, if one’s childhood bedtime stories focused on the homosexually driven myths of meaning
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of Gilgamesh and Enkidu, Patrocles and Achilles. “Imagine if he had been read Walt Whitman’s poems on the love of comrades and had their meaning explained to him. Imagine what it would have been like to hear the Sufi poems praising the love of a beautiful young man as an inner twin and as an evocation of the Divine Beloved.” “What has been missing in our understanding of the psychology of gay men,” states Mondragon, “is that the search for sex has meaning that also needs to take us inward into the psyche to find the transpersonal meaning of being gay, and that without this awareness the hunt for the next hot guy leads to emptiness and disappointment.”
If you would like to offer The Fight at your location, please call 323-297-4001 PUBLISHER Third Step, Inc. DISTRIBUTION Pride in Media The Fight Magazine is published monthly by Third Step, Inc. 611 South Catalina Street, Suite 307 Los Angeles, CA 90005 Telephone 323-297-4001 Fax 213-281-9648 Email info@thefightmag.com
THE FIGHT MAGAZINE LEGAL CAVEATS By listing in The Fight Magazine, advertisers acknowledge that they do business in the spirit of cooperation, fairness and service, maintaining a high level of integrity and responsibility. Providers of products or services are fully and soley responsible for providing same as advertised. The Fight Magazine assumes no liability for improper or negligent business practices by advertisers. Advertisers and their agencies assume responsibility and liability for the content of their advertisements in The Fight Magazine
STANFORD ALTAMIRANO Editor-In-Chief
Publisher assumes no liability for safe-keeping or return of unsolicited art, manuscripts or other materials. The Fight Magazine reserves the right to edit all material for clarity, length and content. All contents ©2011 Third Step, Inc., all rights reserved. Content may be reproduced with permission. The Fight Magazine assumes no liability for any claims or representations contained anywhere in this magazine, and reserves the right to cancel or refuse advertising at publisher’s discretion. www.thefightmag.com
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Dear Editor, A friend of mine told me I should start picking up THE FIGHT. Aside from the articles (he said they were well written) he said you guys manage to keep it sexy without being sexually explicit. (Not WN ISE ABOU T TO ROSIE’S OWN DEM that there’s anything LOVE WINS OUT CIANO COSTA LU wrong with sexually E TIM ONE LAST explicit - but we have enough smutty rags out there already, no?) So, long story short - I just picked up your latest issue with Luciano Costa on the cover (THE FIGHT, Issue 015). All I can say is - he hit the nail on the head! Luciano is one hot, sexy man - and - here’s the kicker - he actually does something for the community. Creating the SoCal Social Club in order to find a better way to engage with others in more meaningful ways beyond the bars is really commendable. Hooking up with newly made friends to go horseback riding or whitewater rafting sounds like an awesome idea... We need more Luciano Costas!
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HATE HIM Dear Editor, Luciano Costa (“Man About Town,” THE FIGHT, Issue 015) is smart, thoughtful, generous, candid, funny and really handsome. I hate him! D. Jackson, via the internet
POWERFUL STUFF Dear Editor, What a fantastic website - anotetomykid.com (“Love Wins Out,” THE FIGHT, Issue 015). Thanks for writing about it. It’s really heartwarming to read these letters to and from LGBT family members. I dare anyone to read a few letters on their site and not get choked åread a father write to his gay son that he is “proud of the person you have become.” Powerful stuff. Anthony Garcia, via the internet
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Dear Editor, The Holy Bible says that if you are a “GAY” homosexual then you shall surely be put to death: “their blood shall be upon them.” I’m not saying we should we kill homosexuals. NO. You need to ask God to forgive you for your sins. You also need to know that when it says that their blood shall be upon them that tells me it is AIDS. That how I feel. No offense. Name Withheld, via the internet Send a letter to the editor by e-mailing: editor@thefightmag.com or faxing: (213) 281-9648. Letters may be shortened for space requirements.
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CALIFORNIA “EX-GAY” THERAPY BILL In what could be a potential blow to the “ex-gay” movement, a proposed California bill seeks to protect gay patients from the mental and physical harms of so-called “reparative” therapies. Written by Sen. Ted Lieu and sponsored by the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) advocacy group Equality California, Senate Bill 1172 would force psychotherapists to tell gay patients about the various harms of undertaking any the so-called “gay therapies,” according to LA Weekly. Think Progress reports that the law would not outright ban all ex-gay therapy, but if passed, would prohibit anyone under the age of 18 from undergoing any sexual orientation change efforts. In addition, all therapists will also require a patient’s consent before proceeding with the therapy. “Clearly, socalled conversion or reparative therapy is scientifically ineffective and has resulted in much harm,” Lieu added. “Simply put, this is an unacceptable therapeutic practice,” bill author Sen. Lieu (D) said in a press advisory last month.
STUDENTS’ SEXUAL ORIENTATION California’s state colleges and universities are laying plans to ask students about their sexual orientation next year on application or enrollment forms, becoming the largest group of schools in the country to do so, reports The Los Angeles Times. The questions, which students could answer voluntarily, would be posed because of a little-known state law aimed at gauging the size of LGBT populations on the campuses. The law encourages UC, Cal State and community colleges to explore whether they are offering enough services, such as counseling, for those students.
THE GAVIN NEWSOM SHOW GAVIN NEWSOM, the lieutenant governor of California, is getting a second job: as a talk show host on Current TV, the progressive cable television upstart, reports The Advocate at www. advocate.com. “The Gavin Newsom Show” will be shown weekly starting in May, the channel announced. Newsom, a Democrat, is perhaps best known for being one of the most prominent political supporters of gay marriages, having authorized same-sex unions in San Francisco in 2004 despite a state ban at the time.
THEFIGHT
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Cher and Congresswoman Mary Bono Mack presented the Stephen F. Kolzak Award to advocate and film and television star CHAZ BONO last month at the 23rd Annual GLAAD Media Awards in Los Angeles. The award is presented to an openly LGBT media professional who has made a significant difference in promoting equality. Academy Award-winning actor Benicio Del Toro presented the Vanguard Award to film star JOSH HUTCHERSON. Hutcherson is a co-founder of LGBT ally organization Straight But Not Narrow (online at: www.wearesbnn. com) and has consistently spoken out about the importance of LGBT equality.
PROTECTING TRANSGENDER SUSPECTS Responding to incidents of violence against transgender arrestees, the Los Angeles Police Department plans to open a segregated lockup for biologically male and female suspects who identify themselves as members of the opposite sex, reports The Los Angeles Times. By early this month, a 24-bed transgender module will open at the LAPD women’s jail downtown, the first such police lockup in the nation. Up until now, transgender men and women arrested by Los Angeles police have been housed in the station closest to where they were detained - most often the jail at the Hollywood Community Police Station on Wilcox Avenue. Transgender women were housed with the male population. Transgender advocates have long argued that such practices put transgender inmates at risk of being sexually assaulted or beaten.
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An assistant principal at a Southern California high school has been temporarily removed from campus while district officials assess his pulling a gay student offstage for saying he hoped he could someday marry the love of his life. Vice Principal Joe Abell of Fullerton Union High School later apologized to 17-year-old Kearian Giertz both privately and over the school’s public address system after the incident last month during the school’s “Mr. Fullerton” competition. Giertz said he does not believe Abell should be fired, but the school and district need to be more tolerant of gay students.
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THE GAY GUY LEAVES ROMNEY CAMPAIGN No sooner had we all learned that the Romnster hired a gay advisor for the general election, the man was gone, resigning at the end of last month as the Romney campaign reportedly begged him to stay. RICHARD GRENELL was hired much to the chagrin of Romney’s conservative base. He also roiled the waters a bit with his semi-humorous tweets at the expense of women on both sides of the aisle, including the comment that Callista Gingrich “snapped on” her hair every morning. (Loved it, Ric.) Indeed, I instantly jumped to the conclusion that Grenell had been ousted for being a public misogynist, but that appears to be wrong. According to Washington Post writer Jennifer Rubin, who broke the story of Grenell’s departure, the man was simply fed up with being relegated to the back shelf of the closet during his first ten days on the job. Faced with far right criticism, the Romney camp never defended Grenell, nor did they put him to work either on or off the camera.
LAW AND ORDER We had a ton of interesting legal developments last month. For one thing, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) ruled that trans discrimination on the job is illegal under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Now, we’re in the odd position of seeing federal law protect trans bias, while still leaving the door open to fire or harass gays and lesbians on the job. We don’t have time to delve into the details, but basically, Title VII’s rule against discrimination “because of sex‚“ has long been assumed to ban discrimination on the basis of gender stereotypes. Now, since the EEOC interprets Title VII for federal courts, it’s official. And what else, you ask? Lambda Legal has filed a suit against the state of Nevada in federal court patterned after our challenge to Prop 8. Nevada, which like California is governed by the Ninth Circuit, offers all the benefits of marriage to same-sex couples, save the most important benefit - the term “marriage” itself. The Ninth Circuit has already ruled this practice unconstitutional for the Golden State, so we hope eventually they’ll do the same for the Land of Gambling. And Immigration Equality has filed a challenge to the Defense of Marriage Act on behalf of several bi-national gay couples who seek green cards for their foreign spouses. Oh, there’s more. But we have to save room for the important news, like the story of the priest who inadvertently aired gay porn to some parents during a presentation on “First Communion.” Or how about the suggestion that Jesus was gay?
“GIRL! IT IS I!” I’m not particularly religious, but like most of us, I was raised breathing the air of our nation’s Judeo Christian atmosphere. For some reason, the idea that Jesus was gay doesn’t attract me. Nor would I appreciate the notion that, say, JESUS liked his meat well done or had a closet full of custom-tailored tunics. He’s supposed to transcend quirks of personality, don’t you think? I should probably explain that an Anglican priest wrote an op-ed in the Guardian claiming that Jesus had a relationship with John because John was hanging out with Mary at the cross. Oh, and Jesus was a bachelor. I guess that those of us who think Jesus represents a quasi-mythical set of ideas have little patience for biological factoids. That said, He was reportedly fond of pedicures and stag dinner parties. Who knows?
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FATHER MCVEIGH’S NAUGHTY CONUNDRUM So while we’re on the subject of priests, picture the scene in the basement of St. Mary’s Primary School, or wherever they set up Power Point presentations for the parents of the wee bairns who are preparing for their first communions in Pomeroy, Ireland. FATHER MARTIN MCVEIGH inserts a memory stick, clicks on a file, and (surprise!) presents his audience with a slide show of explicit manon-man action. According to the Washington Post, that audience (which included an eight-year-old) was left “horrified and distracted.” The good father ran off, but returned after about 20-minutes and made a fund raising pitch, which I’m guessing was not particularly successful. Father McVeigh told church authorities he had no idea how the naughty pix infiltrated his presentation. A day or so after the unfortunate display, Ireland’s Cardinal Sean Brady announced that an investigation was underway, and that although the police were contacted, no criminal charges will be lodged. It’s not clear what will befall the priest, but he’s been missing in action at Mass since the March 26 incident.
PLEASANT STATE INSECTS Did you know that Ohio’s state insect is the ladybug? Cute little critters. Good choice, Ohio! California’s state insect is a butterfly of sorts, as is the state insect of Texas. Without further research, I’m guessing that most states have pleasant state insects, rather than nasty biting pests. I’m back. I just checked and I was right. Almost all the states either have some kind of butterfly, a bee, or a ladybug. The exception is New Mexico, which claims the “tarantula hawk wasp.” Say what? I did some additional checking and the story becomes even more, um, interesting. Back in 1989, it seems as if lawmakers allowed a bunch of elementary school students to decide which insect would represent the Land of Enchantment. For reasons that may seem more evident to a ten-year-old than yours truly, the kids picked this alarming specimen, who lays eggs on top of a paralyzed tarantula. When the eggs hatch, the baby wasps feed on the living spider until it dies. I guess the kids thought that was pretty neat, or something, but I’ll take a ladybug any day of the week. Well, it’s original, I’ll give them that. What would this country be like, one wonders, if more policy decisions were placed in the hands of elementary school students? I can hear some of you echoing the trite chorus that things would be improved. But judging from the tarantula hawk wasp, I disagree.
TOBACCO ROAD TO RUIN In other ballot news, we are all gearing up for the North Carolina anti-gay marriage vote on May 8. Both Barack Obama and Lung Cancer State GOVERNOR BEV PURDUE have urged a no vote, but the polls are not encouraging. Meanwhile, I was cheered to see that the antigay people in Washington had only collected 4,583 signatures to repeal marriage equality after three weeks of petitioning. They have until June 6 to turn in 120,000 valid names, which means they have to get themselves into gear if they’re going to have a shot at killing our communal hopes and dreams next fall. Gay activists are preparing for a marriage fight, although some believe more effort should be focused on a “decline to sign‚“ type effort in order to prevent the repeal from qualifying for the ballot to begin with. To make matters more complicated, the anti-marriage crowd is collecting names for a different ballot measure that operates under different rules. In addition to the repeal, they are also aiming to define marriage as a union of one man and one woman, and for this they need 241,153 names by July 6. I gather that you have to vote “yes” on one of these thing sand “no” on the other, a complication that will surely baffle voters on both sides of the issue if both these nefarious proposals make it to the polls. I suppose I could look up the latest news on our fight to save Maryland’s marriage law, our effort to restore marriage equality in Maine, and our battle against an anti-marriage amendment in Minnesota. But the above discussion of North Carolina and Washington has proved exhausting. I must rest. Ann Rostow writes news analysis columns for THE FIGHT and other gay publications across the country. Rostow can be reached at: arostow@aol.com
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QUEEN LATIFAH
Q
HEADLINES LONG BEACH PRIDE
Queen Latifah will headline the 29th Annual Long Beach Lesbian & Gay Pride Festival this month. The 42-year-old Grammy winner will perform at the festival May 19. It’s Latifah’s first appearance ever at a gay pride festival, said Long Beach Pride co-president Pat Crosby. Over the past several years, the Long Beach Lesbian & Gay Pride Festival & Parade has become the 3rd largest in the nation, now attracting over 75,000 participants over the two-day celebration. More than 200 marching groups and floats comprise the parade entries
since 1995, representing various religious, human service, governmental and social organizations. The Festival Celebration includes seven large dance areas including a main stage which has featured musical artists such as Grammy Award Winner Jennifer Hudson, Maya, and India.Arie. The Pride Festival will take place May 19-20 along Shoreline Drive at Marina Green Park and the parking lot adjacent to Rainbow Lagoon Park. For more info please visit: longbeachpride.com
LA PRIDE GRAND MARSHAL THE TREVOR PROJECT
Christopher Street West, producers of LA PRIDE, is has announced that THE TREVOR PROJECT has been selected as the 2012 Community Grand Marshal for the LA PRIDE Parade, taking place Sunday, June 10, in the City of West Hollywood. The Trevor Project, headquartered along the parade route, has participated in LA PRIDE since its early years, utilizing the exposure to build awareness of its life-saving and life-affirming services for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning (LGBTQ) youth. “42 years ago, when Christopher Street West held the world’s first Pride parade along Hollywood Boulevard, an organization with the sole mission of saving the lives of young LGBTQ people--such as Trevor--wasn’t even in the realm of possibility.
Today, throughout our country, many parents, teachers, counselors, legislators, advocates and even the White House know that Trevor is the default when it comes to supporting kids struggling with their sexual orientation, gender identity, family acceptance and bullying,” said Owen Ward, Christopher Street West Board of Directors. “LA PRIDE has always served as a beacon of hope and inspiration and that is why we are so pleased to bestow the honor of Community Grand Marshal to The Trevor Project.” With an army of volunteers across the country, The Trevor Project’s life-saving services, like the Trevor Lifeline are always there when a young person needs to talk live because they are facing a crisis or considering suicide. The organization also manages TrevorChat, a secure instant message service allowing young people to connect with a counselor online, and TrevorSpace, a social network specifically for LGBTQ teens and young adults with 32,000 members from 128 countries around the world. For more info on The Trevor Project please visit: thetrevorproject.org For more info on the Los Angeles Pride Festival and Parade please visit: www.lapride.org
WEST HOLLYWOOD PRIDE DAYS June is recognized as Pride Month by the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender community worldwide. Events are held in June to commemorate the anniversary of the STONEWALL REBELLION in New York City on June 28, 1969, which most historians consider to be the birth of the modern LGBT civil rights movement. The City of West Hollywood will once again celebrate the depth, breadth and wealth of LGBT arts and culture with its annual festival One City / One Pride throughout June 2012. There are both free and ticketed events featuring theatre, film, music, poetry, spoken word, visual art exhibits and more. Visit www. lapride.org to see updated calendar listings for program, ticketing and reservation information. While there is no charge for free events, it is recommended to reserve a space (if so noted) since seating will be limited at most venues. THEFIGHT
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MANHATTAN BEACH
T
he L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center officials said last month that they were “surprised and outraged” to learn that a local news broadcaster has decided to display on its website the mug shots, names and birthdates for the 18 men who were recently charged in an undercover sex sting operation at a Manhattan Beach public restroom.
The men were reportedly charged with victimless crimes ranging from loitering to engaging in lewd conduct in a public place. “It’s shocking that any news operation, but especially an affiliate of a major network like CBS, would choose to publish the mug shots, names and birthdates of people charged with victimless crimes, simply because the charges are salacious or related to gay sex,” said L.A Gay & Lesbian Center Chief of Staff Darrel Cummings. “Naturally we don’t condone illegal activity of any kind, but these men haven’t been proven
ENTRAPMENT CONTROVERSY
guilty and historically, charges such as those leveled against them have involved police entrapment. Publishing their photos serves no purpose other than to humiliate and destroy their lives. We call on KCBS/ KCAL to immediately remove the images and names from their website.”
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The Center said one of the arrestees had reported to them that a fellow suspect attempted suicide after the results of the sting were made public. Jim Key, chief spokesman for the Gay & Lesbian Center, said the Manhattan Beach Police Department could have worked with the center to try to stop men from meeting in the restroom, located beside the beach at the foot of Marine Avenue. Key said the Los Angeles Police Department took the public education approach, rather than mass arrests, to cut down on a public sex problem at Griffith Park. Some have suggested that Manhattan Beach may have publicized the arrests because of the suspects’ sexual orientation.
Some have suggested that Manhattan Beach may have publicized the arrests because of the suspects’ sexual orientation. THEFIGHT
21
SAVING CALIFORNIA
FROM HOMOSEXUALS SAVE CALIFORNIA URGED PARENTS LAST MONTH TO KEEP THEIR KIDS AWAY FROM SCHOOL, AS NOT TO “LET THE HOMOSEXUALBISEXUALTRANSSEXUALISTS INDOCTRINATE YOUR CHILD OR ANY OTHER CHILDREN.” BY
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VICTOR MELAMED
T
he Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC), a nonprofit civil rights organization dedicated to fighting hate and bigotry, lists the Sacramento based “Save California” (savecalifornia.com) as one of the state’s top anti-gay hate groups. The group, supposedly devoted to family values, and its president, Randy Thomasson, has lied about gay people. A lot. “In order to make the list as an anti-gay group, the group has to lie, defame or spread false propaganda about the LGBT community,” Heidi Beirich, director of SPLC’s Intelligence Project, told the Sacramento News & Review. “In this case, language that depicts LGBT people as predatory, attempting to convert children and as having unhealthy lifestyles all of those things - are what got him on the list.” Beirich noted that such language about an entire group “increases the likelihood of hate crimes being directed at that group.” Save California’s most recent anti-gay campaign took place last
month. The group distributed fliers instructing parents to keep ment, and the reason it’s been far more successful than these their children home from school to boycott The National Day of inane conservative responses is because it addresses an actual Silence. issue. Homosexuality in schools isn’t the problem. But homophoThe National Day of Silence is a day of action in which students bia in schools is.” across the country vow to take a form of silence to call attention “On the other hand,” says Jones, “maybe they should take their to the silencing effect of anti-LGBT bullying and harassment in kids out of school. That way, the Day of Silence can also be a Day schools. Without People Whose Parents Taught Them to Hate Us for No Founded in 1996, the Day of Silence has become the largest single student-led action towards creating safer schools for all, regardless of sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression. The Day of Silence’s purpose is to bring attention to anti-LGBT Good Reason. I’m sure we won’t be missing much.” name-calling, bullying and harassment and effective responses. The group’s upcoming events include a protest against schools The goal of the Day of Silence is to make schools safer for all acknowledging Harvey Milk Day. Milk, the first openly gay man students, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity/ elected to public office in the country, was responsible for passing expression. gay rights ordinances for the city of San Francisco and served According to The Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network eleven months in office before he was assassinated on November (GLSEN) The Day of Silence is an opportunity for students to work 27, 1978 along with San Francisco Mayor George Moscone. Hartoward improving school climate for all students. GLSEN advises vey Milk Day is celebrated on his birthday, May 22. students interested in participatSave California warns parents to “proing to discuss their intentions with tect their children from ‘Harvey Milk their administration and teachers Gay Day,’” and laments the fact that long before the event. The day is “there’s no state law prohibiting the most successful when schools and promotion of homosexual, bisexual, students work together to show or transsexual lifestyles to impressiontheir commitment to ensuring safe able children.” schools for all students. Many The group does not limit its protests to schools allow students’ participahigh school activities. Save California’s tion throughout the day. Some Randy Thomasson lashed out a few schools ask students to speak as months ago against the Queer Studies would during class minor at Cal State Fullerton. Parents,they takenormally charge and keep your child Parents, take charge and keep your child HOME from Friday,breaks April 20 HOME from public school Friday, April 20 and public remainschool silent during According to Thomasson, a sincere and at lunch. There is no single academic discussion of the LGBT What isway the “Day of Silence”?and students are What is the “Day of Silence”? to participate, community would show that no one is On Friday, April 20, students teachers On Friday, April 20, students and teachers advocating encouraged toand take partadvocating in the way born gay and that people can simply homosexuality, bisexuality, cross-dressing and sex changes homosexuality, bisexuality, cross-dressing and sex changes is the most positive and academic upliftchange their sexual orientation and will take that over public schools and disrupt your child’s will take over public schools and disrupt your child’s academic environment by refusing to speak in classrooms all day. environment by refusing to speak in classrooms all day. ing for their school. become ex-gays, “but they are dishonCan I keep myCalifornia child at home to avoid this? last Can I keep my child at home to avoid this? Save urged parents est so they are indoctrinating college Yes! Protect your kids beingtheir sexually indoctrinated. Yes! Protect your kids from being sexually indoctrinated. You month tofrom keep kids away You students to think that homosexuality, don’t have to put up with “Day of Silence” disruption. Exercise don’t have to put up with “Day of Silence” disruption. Exercise from school, as notonto “let the bisexuality and transexuality is good your right to keep your child home April 20. (If students your right to keep your child home on April 20. (If students will be permitted to be silent another day, boycott on that day.) will be permitted to be silent another day, boycott on that day.) homosexual-bisexual-transsexualand natural, maybe even for them.” ists indoctrinate your child or any He went on to warn that the minor Get the details you need here: Get the details you need here: other children.” could spread like an “infection” http://savecalifornia.com/day-of-silence-walk-out.html http://savecalifornia.com/day-of-silence-walk-out.html groups Save Califorthrough academia and will be “trainDownloadAnti-gay a sample letter to give to like the school principal, Download a sample letter to give to the school principal, and help spread the word to other parents to protect their children. and help spread the word to other parents to protect their children. nia claim that “the Day of Silence ing up an army to become intolerant is meant to ‘transform the moral activists” who will work to undermine beliefs of other people’s chiland extinguish “free speech” and P.O. Box 511 x Sacramento, CA 95812 P.O. Box 511 x Sacramento, CA 95812 APRIL 2012 APRIL 2012 dren,’” says THE FIGHT contribu“religious freedom.” tor Zinnia Jones. Save California, which has also oper“If their ‘moral beliefs’ involve atated under the names Save America, tacking other students for being gay, then yes, that’s exactly the Rescue Your Child and the Campaign for Children and Families, point,” says Jones. lists as its address a box at the central post office in downtown “Nine out of ten LGBT students have experienced anti-gay harass- Sacramento. Its phone number is directed to an answering ment, and even straight students can be the victims of homophomachine, and all requests for press and interviews are funneled bic bullying. Students know this, they’ve seen it happening, and through a booking agency. Repeated attempts to reach Thomasthey want to do something about it. This is a student-led moveson or any spokesperson for Save California were unsuccessful.
According to Thomasson, a sincere academic discussion of the LGBT community would show that no one is born gay and that people can simply change their sexual orientation and become ex-gay.
California Parent Alert
California Parent Alert
Q: A:
Q: A:
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WHEN IT DOESN’T GET BETTER
14-YEAR OLD KENNETH WEISHUHN COMMITTED SUICIDE AFTER BEING CONTINUOUSLY BULLIED BY CLASSMATES BY
A
PATRICK TSAKUDA
gay Iowa teen committed suicide last month after friends and family say that classmates sent him death threats on his cell phone and made him the subject of a Facebook hate group. Weishuhn, 14, was a freshman at South O’Brien High School, which serves three small towns in northwest Iowa, including Primghar, Kenneth’s hometown of 909 people. School officials apparently were aware of the bullying but did not notify Kenneth’s family. “Mom, you don’t know how it feels to be hated,” Kenneth’s mother, Jeannie, said he told her, reports KTIV, a local news station. Kenneth Weishuhn didn’t know either, until he told his friends last month that he was gay. “People that were originally his friends, they kind of turned on him,” said his sister Kayla Weishuhn. Teasing started in school, according Kayla, a sophomore. She says it was the boys in her class, that bullied her brother over his sexuality. “A lot of people, they either joined in or they were too scared to say anything,” she said. She says they took their teases online, to websites like Facebook, creating a hate group against gays and adding Kenneth’s friends as members. However, it was only the beginning. Family members say he started receiving death threats from South O’Brien students on his phone. “When I’d question him about the phone calls, like he just blew it off, so I just thought everything was ok,” said his mother. The mother told KITV she has not yet decided whether she’ll press charges against the students she says drove her son to his death. “I really don’t want to ruin somebody else’s life, or take
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someone else’s son or daughter from them. But, I don’t know what it’s going to take to get it to stop,” she said. “To make someone feel so horrible about themselves, so miserable. To make them hate themselves they way my brother must have,” said his sister. For now, Kenneth’s family is trying to come to terms with their loss. “Why? You were so beautiful, you had so much to offer. Why?” asked his distraught mother. A Facebook group created in his memory, now has over 1500 members, almost twice the number of people in Kenneth’s hometown.
“Mom, you don’t know how it feels to be hated,” Kenneth’s mother, Jeannie, said he told her. One entry notes, “My heart goes out to you and your family. I cried when I first read this. Why? It’s beyond comprehension in this day and age you were subjected to this. All because of hate and ignorance. What a tragic loss of what could have been. My thoughts are with you, young man. May you have found peace.” A Pinterest page with Kenneth James Weishuhn’s name includes a quote from Glee star Chris Colfer: “There’s nothing wrong with you. There’s a lot wrong with the world you live in.” To which Weishuhn added, “I hope so.” The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning youth. If you need support please call the Trevor Lifeline at: 866-4887386. For more information visit: www.thetrevorproject.org.
WORLDS
AWAY
EMERGING POP ARTIST AIDEN LESLIE ON GROWING UP GAY IN OHIO, HIS PASSION FOR ELVIS AND HOW A FAMILY TRAGEDY IMPACTED HIS MUSICAL PATH BY
MARK ARIEL
PHOTOS
RICK DAY rickdaynyc.com
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M
y ultimate mission as a performer is to share my story and experiences,” says emerging pop artist Aiden Leslie, who recently returned to the music scene with his first single in two years, “Worlds Away.” The track has managed to resonate with fans around the world as it has recently risen to the Number One position on Logo-TV’s Click List and stayed there for a consecutive 4-week reign. Leslie recently released his anticipated follow-up to “World’s Away,” the pop anthem “Trying to Leave Now” which is quickly rising on the charts. In an interview with THE FIGHT Leslie talks about his childhood as a gay boy, his passion for Elvis and how a family tragedy impacted his musical path.
COMING OUT I was raised in a quiet suburb of Cincinnati. There were a lot of advantages to growing up outside of the big city. I was surrounded by nature, which allowed me a lot freedom in many ways. It was a safe environment that provided a nice sense of structure for a child. But, I never really felt like I belonged there. Six days after my high school graduation I moved to New York City... I came out very young. I was gay from my some of my earliest memories, so it never felt odd to me that I liked men. What was hard was living in a society that looked down upon it as being wrong. In school, it was clear I was not like the other kids...and it was very hard because I couldn’t change who I was or how I may have appeared or “acted” in relation to everyone else. I remember being very sad. I withdrew a lot the older I became. The turning point was when my parents recognized that I needed to be in an environment that would support my creativity and nurture who I was as an individual. They enrolled me in a Children’s Performing Arts School, which helped me find my way and express myself. When they did that, I think it saved me from turning down a darker path that has haunted many kids struggling with their sexuality. My family and close friends were always very supportive of my sexuality. They reacted with lots of love. I know that it’s not that way for everyone, so I feel blessed that was my experience.
THE THEATER CONNECTION After moving to New York I was cast in an off-Broadway play called “The Boy From Minnesota.” It was an original play that I auditioned for after I saw an ad in The Village Voice, seeking the leading role. It was the story of a young man moving to the city young and alone finding his way... something I identified with very much. Working in the theater without a doubt gave me a foundation to what I do in my music today. It’s part of my journey and influences what I say in my songs.
MUSICAL INFLUENCES Growing up in Ohio, I was influenced by years in the church, 80’s pop, and musicals. One of my earliest memories was hearing Elvis records being played by my parents. I remember how much joy his songs brought to my house. So, for me being a young child, I responded to that joy and that’s why I think I had such a strong association to him and more importantly, music... When I was doing that play in the Village, the sound engineer on the show I was working on was also a DJ. One day on a lunch break, he asked if I wanted to join him while he went record shop-
ping for his gig he was doing later that night at The Tunnel. He took me to the legendary Eightball Records in The East Village and I was immediately fascinated. Underground Music was an instant connection for me. I never felt that way in the theatre. It spoke to me and I knew I was onto something.
FAMILY TRAGEDY A few years into my music career my sister passed away. Her sudden death was due to a brain embolism caused by blood clots in her lungs. But, what ultimately lead to this was her years of addiction and drug abuse. She was 36 years old when she passed. When she died, it was an incredible blow to my family and left a huge impact on my own future path. I wasn’t ever really sure I would do music after her death, but ultimately found my way back to myself and for sure channeled that darkness into my music. My sister was my biggest supporter and she believed that I could do it even when I didn’t see it for myself. I miss her very much.
“When my sister died, it was an incredible blow to my family and left a huge impact on my own future path. I wasn’t ever really sure I would do music after her death, but ultimately found my way back to myself and for sure channeled that darkness into my music.” FINDING MY WAY I have a new single and video that I’m working on for release this summer w0hich I’m very excited about. Personally, I’m continuing to find my way. I’m so happy to be doing what I love and am looking forward to sharing that with someone someday. In the mean time, I’m enjoying the ride. I’m single, at the moment, and feel more at peace than I probably have been in my entire life. I know that my personal life will eventually be more balanced with my professional life. I’m not searching for a relationship at the moment, but I’m definitely open to the possibilities that are before me. For more on Aiden Leslie, visit: www.aidenleslie.com & www.facebook. com/aidenleslie
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DOMESTIC VIOLENCE:
MYTHS & MISCONCEPTIONS
THERE ARE MANY WAYS IN WHICH LGBT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS DIFFERENT THAN DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AMONG STRAIGHT COUPLES
T
he L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center is the nation’s largest provider of LGBT-specific domestic violence services, including counseling, legal assistance and a courtapproved batterers-intervention program. Offering services that are specifically tailored to LGBT people is important because, although the core of the problem is the same, there are many ways in which LGBT domestic violence is different than domestic violence among straight couples. Susan Holt, manager of the Center’s STOP Domestic Violence program, and Terra Slavin, manager of the Center’s Domestic Violence Legal Advocacy Project, address some of the common myths and misconceptions about LGBT domestic violence.
MYTH Domestic violence isn’t a problem for LGBT people.
REALITY Domestic violence occurs in an estimated 1 in 3 relationships, and at about the same rate in same-sex couples as opposite-sex couples.
MYTH When domestic violence occurs in same-sex couples, it’s most likely mutual.
REALITY The core of domestic violence is that one partner systematically asserts power and control over the other. It is rarely, if ever, mutual. An abused person in a same-sex relationship is more likely to fight back against an abusive partner, but that is not the same as both partners being abusive. However, it does mean that identifying which partner is the abuser can be difficult, especially for police officers or counselors who are not knowledgeable about the problem.
MYTH The more masculine or “butch” partner is typically the abuser.
REALITY Gender roles do not determine which partner is abusive. Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence. For more information about the Center’s domestic violence services, go to lagaycenter.org/domesticviolence.
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UNDERSTANDING LGBT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Being closeted and/or HIV-positive can be used against victims. Same-sex couples may have the same friends, making it more difficult for the victim to seek help or create an escape plan. There is a dearth of resources to help LGBT people-and there are no shelters specifically for LGBT people. Women’s shelters often aren’t safe for lesbians because their abusers can gain access and men frequently have no shelter options. In many cases, police officers called to the scene will not realize that two men or women are a couple-or the two are fearful of identifying themselves as a couple-and the incident will not be classified as domestic violence. Abusers may threaten to “out” HIV-positive victims. In some cases, an abuser may purposely infect the victim with HIV or threaten to do so. Crystal meth, common in the “P&P” (party and play) scene, also increases the risk of domestic violence for some gay men.
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HOW TO ACHIEVE GREATER INTIMACY
BY PHILIP PIERCE, PH.D.
’m ready to give up!” Billy said angrily as Roger glared back. The two men had been together for eleven years but both felt that over the last eight months, they had become increasingly distant. And now, Roger’s recent affair had pushed them to the brink of breaking up. In addition to infidelity, both partners identified poor communication as a major problem in their relationship. Therapeutic interventions in this situation will focus on helping the couple initiate frank discussions, reestablish trust and attempt to become closer again. While the norms in gay relationships may permit outside sex, discussion (and agreement!) of the rules are vital, especially given the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases and infecting an unsuspecting partner. Issues of power, closeness/independence, sexual satisfaction and conflict resolution are apt to emerge as particularly important in couples counseling. I’ve found that an emphasis on emotional acceptance can be particularly valuable and decrease useless struggle to change the partner’s behavior; discussion of problems and differences can then become a way to achieve greater closeness. Each partner is encouraged to acknowledge his or her role in their problems. Unilaterally making personal changes can increase relationship satisfaction - “change” becomes a gift with no expectations of receiving a reciprocal offering. Fundamental in this is that both partners understand the difficulty in changing another’s behavior; however, if each partner agrees to change his or her own actions to please the other, each can get more of what he or she desires. Improving listening skills and making “I” statements rather than using accusatory language are interventions that are often suggested. Problem solving, which includes talking about only one problem at a time, taking responsibility for one’s own errors and brainstorming to find effective solutions can also be helpful. Ultimately, emotional acceptance can help couples use their differences as vehicles to achieve greater intimacy. Acceptance can be one of the most effective vehicles for change! Dr. Philip Pierce is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Beverly Hills and a Lecturer at UCLA. He can be reached at (310) 248-2335 or drphilippierce@ gmail.com. For more information, go to: www.DrPhilipPierce.com
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THEFIGHT
29
WHEN SEX
ISN’T ENOUGH HOW ONE MAN’S EXPLORATION OF HIS GAY SELFHOOD IS BEGINNING TO TURN HIS LIFE AROUND
BY
THOMAS MONDRAGON, LMFT
D
ale starts telling me about all the sex he has had over the course of his lifetime from early adolescence up until now. Dale is a gay middle-aged man who is describing his relationship to sex, and “there has been a lot of it” he says, sheepishly and proudly at the same time.
As Dale talks he becomes tearful at times and angry at other times because over the past few months he has begun to have a different understanding of his sex drive that encompasses a connection to a new range of feelings, needs, traumas, and an unexpected vision of gay love, inherent in getting turned on. Through this journey into his feeling, memories, and same-sex desire lies a deeper understanding about his sexuality and the meaning of being gay.
LABELED A SISSY Like many young gay boys, Dale was aware of feeling different early on. He speaks of how he used to sneak looks at the cute boy in his classroom, how he imagined they would become special friends. But also, like many young gay boys, Dale quickly learned that these
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cute boys were not acceptable objects of desire for him to have let alone tell anyone about. Being the noticeable protogay boy that he was, early on he was labeled a sissy, fag and an outcast. Dale describes being horribly bullied at school, teased and traumatized by his peers and schools. At home, his parents told him he was “special,” yet they were stone silent in regards to his obvious difference as the reason for being bullied. He felt all of this as a deep level as toxic shame whose core message is that he was defective and disgusting, and that ultimately he was unlovable. This also set him on the road to a lifelong struggle with depression and anxiety.
COMPULSORY HETEROSEXISM Gay people as children experience everything from overt traumas to the covert and deadly silence of non-regard and non-mirroring around their budding gay sensibilities. These are forms of emotional and sexual abuse for gay boys rooted in the narrow confines of the compulsory heterosexism that all children are subject to. Yet much of childhood development is driven by sexuality as a drive that too often gets mired in shame and confusion resulting in selfhatred and low self-esteem. Dale tells me about beginning to play sexually with other boys around the age of 12 or 13. He smiles, remembering the excite-
ment, playfulness, and joy of it all. Having sex, says Dale, was a place where he could fantasize - “where I could be whoever I wanted to be at that moment.” Later on, reveals Dale, those hot initial encounters lead to the fantasy about what it would be like to be dating this man, having him as his special buddy just as he fantasized as a young boy.
SECRET SHAME We can imagine that a Gay Spirit was calling him as a young boy through his awakening homosexual desire as he played with his childhood buddies. When we have a gay-centered approach to the meaning of gay male erotic desire and love we can see that early on as a child, the young gay boy is in need of affirming and understanding parenting that would honor, encourage, and validate the transformational potential of having a gay personality. The powerful feeling of wanting to pursue homosexual desire takes on a different meaning besides just being horny, and now this inexplicably driven desire can be seen as sourced into the deepest core of the mind and psyche of a developing gay child and is continually stirred in adulthood whenever we see that hot man walk by or feel the wish for romance and love. Yet for Dale his playful desires came with a horrific amount of shame, always resulting afterwards in a complete sanitizing scrub down in the shower to try and feel clean again. Pressured by compulsory heterosexism he dated girls, and hid behind religion. His homosexual desire had become a secret to be ashamed of. Yet in spite of this horrific shame, he found himself sneaking into the woods even when it was cold and raining, to find a place under a tree and have sex in the cold with his one special buddy.
PANDORA’S BOX Imagine what would have happened if he had been given the idea that the image of his special friend and that hot feeling he had in sex was also a way into an inner experience of himself as gay, where a hot inner Gay Soul Figure lives in his mind and heart, emboldening him to a connection with his innate goodness as a gay boy, rich with unimagined potential and possibility. His childhood bedtime stories should have been the homosexually driven myths of meaning of Gilgamesh and Enkidu, Patrocles and Achilles. Imagine if he had been read Walt Whitman’s poems on the love of comrades and had their meaning explained to him. Imagine what it would have been like to hear the Sufi poems praising the love of a beautiful young man as an inner twin and as an evocation of the Divine Beloved. When he finally came out at around age 23, he says he “opened Pandora’s box to his sexuality” discovering the bars and dance clubs, finding boys and turning tricks. “I didn’t think so much about who I was going home with as much as I wanted companionship.” Because he was so insecure and hungry for love, he wanted that special someone to make him feel good and whole even if it was for a couple hours. Dale describes suddenly being in the company of a brotherhood of other gay men exploring sex in the bars and clubs. In the bathhouses, he says he didn’t have the same fear of rejection as in the outside world because “everyone was there for sex with other men.” This was the place where anything goes and his fantasies could be fulfilled. Dale also talks about having had sex in the parks and cruising areas, with a certain relish about the risk of getting caught. A lot of times, he says, “I was simply horny. So I went to the park to meet someone” and there he would masturbate or have sex
with another man in the bushes. Because of his low self-esteem he admits that he engaged in unsafe sex, and now calls this a form of suicidal behavior. Desperately lonely, he says “I wanted to be cared about and loved, touched and acknowledged” and was willing to risk his health in the attempt to find this.
DEEPLY FRACTURED What has been missing in our understanding of the psychology of gay men, is that the search for sex has meaning that also needs to take us inward into the psyche to find the transpersonal meaning of being gay, and that without this awareness the hunt for the next hot guy leads to emptiness and disappointment. Without the understanding of the powerful way in which psyche flourishes through the symbolic meaning of our outer lives, it is understandable that Dale would continually search for that next sexual encounter and the brief yet temporary good feeling it might offer. Yet no hot man can fill the void of an unfulfilled relationship to a lively inner lover soul companion found in the imagination and fantasy world. Without an understanding of psyche’s language of symbols through dreams, fantasy, and imagination, there is instead a deeply fractured relationship to the archetypal gay self, experienced as internalized homophobia, self-hatred, low self-esteem and emptiness. When out at bars Dale says he used to pretend to be having fun, but inside he was terribly lonely. He reveals that he longed to look into another man’s eyes and feel accepted. He has had several relationships where he experienced those blissful moments, especially in the beginning, where that lonely feeling was at bay, for a while.
Seeing the partner as the knight in shining armor only lasts so long, and then he is suddenly another guy who isn’t Mr. Perfect after all, so it must mean it’s time to move on and maybe the next guy will be the one. Times where he felt loved, but too often dependent on how his partner was with him. Desperate for love, he acted out a lifelong pattern of pleasing the other in the attempt to get love in return, sourced early on in the visible and/or invisible rejection of his parents, family and social institutions and his attempts to feel loved. Intolerable feeling to bear, too often gay boys become the best little boys in the world as a compensation.
MR. PERFECT In relationships, this dynamic can continue as each partner tries to hide the painful memories of growing up gay and the resulting inability to trust and be vulnerable, while also attempting to hide the destructive toxic shame and hurt/rage related to the initial parental and societal wounds. Seeing the partner as the knight in shining armor only lasts so long, and then he is suddenly another guy who isn’t Mr. Perfect after all, so it must mean it’s time to move on and maybe the next guy will be the one. But what is happening is that the projection onto the partner as “The One” wears off, and those unacknowledged, unprocessed, undigested feelings and traumas in each partner come back replacing the good feelings that last only those first few months. At the end of his last relationship Dale started exploring online dating sites, spending hours in the search for contact, too many times not connecting, leaving him unfulfilled. Dale describes how so Continued on next page
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many times after a hook-up he walked away not feeling good about himself because, as he states, he was now coming to understand that due to the abuse of bullying, heterosexism and neglectful parents, he was now abusing himself by searching for something outside himself. He says he was looking for something in other men that he didn’t have in himself. Dale sees that something new has been happening for him - he has been getting in touch with a whole host of long unfelt and unacknowledged feelings that have been relegated to the shadow and unconscious realms, including deep levels of hurt and rage about the abusive traumas and emotional psychological assaults to his gay selfhood that began early on. With feelings that are new, raw, and often unfocused, he is developing a willingness to begin to look at the abuse he suffered as a child. He is beginning to realize now how those evenings at the bathhouse or at the park were driven by the erotic fire of homosexual love, yet tainted with the trauma of toxic shame, deep loneliness and horrific self-hatred. Sometimes overwhelmed by this new awakening, he talks about getting in touch with anger shrouded in the severe depression and anxiety he has suffered, rooted in the undigested trauma he experienced growing up gay. Dale says that realizing the positive potential of a healthy felt expression of his newly discovered anger has been especially difficult and scary. He can begin to see that through expressing this and other feelings, he is in effect giving himself an experience of the powerful alchemical and transformative value of his gay feeling life as a reflection of an innate worthiness. He can begin to reclaim his true nature of being lovable because he is gay, from the inside out. “It feels good to finally just feel all this stuff and talk about it,” says Dale. He can now start to develop a relationship to his inner world, and admits he has never really learned how to be still and process his feelings. He now has the opportunity to be on a journey of ongoing gaycentered inner work.
UNDISCOVERED POSSIBILITIES Dale reveals that it is terrifying at times to be so open and honest, and admits he lives with the fear of plummeting into his lifelong struggle with depression. But, with a gay-centered vision, he can also now begin to imagine the gay soul figure inside him as the impetus to face his demons, rather than the painful cycle of endlessly running away from his feelings into the arms of a stranger. With a new understanding of his sexuality, he can imagine honoring the little gay boy inside himself who, as he states, always felt like the underdog. Now he sees that he was the underdog because of the entrenchment of internalized homophobia and traumas. He is in the process discovering the worthiness of this new journey of self-regard and self-relatedness that is not to be found when running away from himself to that next hot guy he meets for sex. Now when he feels horny and has the urge to have sex, instead of searching for an emotional fix for painful emptiness and the homophobic attack on his gay self, his sexual encounters with another man can become a way to relate to the erotic potential of gay love as the way to open up undiscovered possibilities in the gay mind and heart. West Hollywood based psychotherapist Thomas Mondragon is a professor at Antioch University Los Angeles’ LGBT Specialization in Clinical Psychology, providing students the skills needed for LGBT affirmative psychotherapeutic practice. He can be reached at: (310) 779-3113 or via email: tjmondragon@mac.com
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CA TESTS HIV-PREVENTION PILL
C
alifornia will test an HIV-prevention pill in an attempt to slow the spread of the disease in the state, researchers announced last month. The pill, which is already used to treat HIV patients, will be prescribed to 700 gay and bisexual men and transgender women in Los Angeles, San Diego and Long Beach who are high-risk but not infected, reports The Los Angeles Times. “With this new prevention pill, we have another intervention to put in the arsenal to try and impact this epidemic,” said George Lemp, director of the California HIV/AIDS Research Program with the UC president’s office. The program awarded $11.8 million in state grants for the prevention pill studies and efforts to get about 3,000 HIV-infected people in Southern California into treatment and keep them there. The grants will go to a group of UC schools, local governments and AIDS organizations. The pill, under the brand name of Truvada, is already approved by the Food and Drug Administration for treating HIV but not for prophylactic use. In 2010, a study published in the New England Journal of Medicine said that it reduced the risk of contracting HIV by 44% to 73%, depending on how often participants took their medication. The two-drug pill, produced by Gilead Sciences in the Bay Area, has side effects that include nausea and vomiting, and possible kidney problems when used with other anti-HIV drugs. A recent Stanford University study showed that the pill, which costs about $26 a day, only makes sense economically if prescribed to people at high risk, such as those with multiple partners. The prevention pill and counseling have “enormous possibilities” for high-risk people, said Phil Curtis, director of government affairs for AIDS Project Los Angeles, which will be recruiting participants. But more research is needed to measure the effects in the real world, when patients may not be followed as closely, he said. “It is unrealistic to expect that a patient without HIV is going to see a doctor every month,” he said. The director of San Diego’s study, Dr. Richard Haubrich of UC San Diego School of Medicine, said that when taken as prescribed, the pill can prevent HIV infection. But he said the biggest impediment is people taking their medicine.
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STRAIGHT
ALLIES
A SELECTION OF WHAT A FEW OF OUR STRAIGHT ALLIES (SOME BETTER KNOWN FOR THEIR VIEWS ON THE SUBJECT THAN OTHERS) HAVE TO SAY ABOUT GAY RIGHTS. ELISABETH HASSELBECK? WHO KNEW?
NO BRAINER
Jack Black
“I’ve got a lot of gay and lesbian friends and family, so it’s personal to me when people and the government start talking about them as less than. It just seems like one of the no-brainers in our society. There are not a lot of no-brainers where you’re like, ‘this is right and that is wrong and I’m definitely on this side,’ where you want to go out and sing about it and do things. But it feels good to be on the right side of history.”
WE’LL BE ASHAMED Chris Evans
“It’s insane that civil rights are being denied people in this day and age. It’s embarrassing, and it’s heartbreaking. It goes without saying that I’m completely in support of gay marriage. In 10 years we’ll be ashamed that this was an issue.”
VOTE FOR EQUALITY Brad Pitt
“No one has the right to deny another their life, even though they disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so desire if it doesn’t harm another and because discrimination has no place in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8.”
SANCTITY CRAP
Clint Eastwood
“These people who are making a big deal out of gay marriage? i don’t give a fuck about who wants to get married to anybody else! Why not?! We’re making a big deal out of things we shouldn’t be making a deal out of. They go on and on with all this bullshit about ‘sanctity’ -- don’t give me that sanctity crap! Just give everybody the chance to have the life they want.”
ELIMINATE THE RIGHT Steven Spielberg
“By writing discrimination into our state constitution, Proposition 8 seeks to eliminate the right of each and every citizen in our state to marry regardless of sexual orientation. Such discrimination has NO place in California’s constitution, or any other.
THEIR GRANDCHILDREN’S EYES Sean Penn
“I think that it is a good time for those who voted for the ban against gay marriage to sit and reflect and anticipate their great shame and the shame in their grandchildren’s eyes if they continue that way of support. We’ve got to have equal rights for everyone.”
WHO DOES IT HURT George Clooney
“I think it’s funny, but the last thing you’ll ever see me do is jump up and down, saying, ‘these are lies!’ that would be unfair and unkind to my good friends in the gay community... I’m not going to let anyone make it seem like being gay is a bad thing. My private life is private, and I’m very happy in it. Who does it hurt if someone thinks I’m gay?”
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DECENT HUMAN BEING
Anne Hathaway
“There are people who have said that I’m being brave for being openly supportive of gay marriage, gay adoption, basically of gay rights but with all due respect I humbly dissent, I’m not being brave, I’m being a decent human being. And I don’t think I should receive an award for that or for merely stating what I believe to be true, that love is a human experience not a political statement.”
CHILDREN OF GOD Phil Donahue
“A world without closets...a place where love can be expressed freely and without anxiety...Gay children of God are entitled to the same rights as all the other children.”
MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS Betty White
“I don’t care who anybody sleeps with. If a couple has been together all that time - and there are gay relationships that are more solid than some heterosexual ones - I think it’s fine if they want to get married. I don’t know how people can get so anti-something. Mind your own business, take care of your affairs, and don’t worry about other people so much.”
LOVE IS LOVE
Elisabeth Hasselbeck
“I support gay marriage... When my conservative friends first approached me about gay marriage, I’d always ask them if they actually knew anyone who’s personally gay. The ones who said, ‘Yes, I do,’ were the ones who always supported gay marriage, because they recognized... that love is love. Those who opposed the issue were the same ones who said they did not know anyone who was gay. That’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned: to not have an opinion on something you don’t know anything about.”
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I LGBT FERTILITY
LAW GROUP LEGAL ASSISTANCE FOR GAY AND LESBIAN COUPLES WHO PLAN TO BECOME PARENTS THROUGH ASSISTED REPRODUCTION
Richard Vaughn, Photo: J. Horton
nternational Fertility Law Group, Inc., (IFLG) was founded by Will Halm and Rich Vaughn, attorneys who have specialized exclusively in assisted reproduction and family formation law for over a decade. IFLG welcomes gay and lesbian couples who plan to become parents through assisted reproduction. IFLG founders Will Halm and Rich Vaughn and their respective partners became parents by means of assisted reproductive technology and surrogacy. It was their joyful experiences as intended parents that inspired Will and Rich to focus their law practice on helping other families like theirs. IFLG understands the legal issues and societal challenges that are unique to LGBT intended parents. Will and his life partner, Marcellin Simard, were the first same-gender couple in history to receive a legal judgment ordering both their names placed on the birth certificate as parents in a gestational surrogacy case. Will has since helped many intended parents obtain pre-birth parental rights. Rich studied reproduc-
tive and fertility law at Loyola University Chicago School of Law in the early 1990s and has been featured as a fertility law expert at numerous legal and family-building conferences and on National Public Radio. Both Will and Rich are active supporters of LGBT social service organizations such as Family Equality Council, The American Fertility Association, Pop Luck Club, and the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center as well as other charitable causes. Today, Will and Rich are among the world’s best known experts in the fields of assisted reproduction law, reproductive law and family formation law. With expertise in the areas of surrogacy, egg donation, embryo donation, sperm donation, parental establishment, non-traditional family formation, co-parenting and secondparent adoption, the International Fertility Law Group team offers same-sex couples the understanding, support and legal expertise they and their families deserve as they begin the exciting journey of becoming parents via assisted reproductive technology. Call IFLG at (323) 904-4733 or e-mail at Info@IFLG.net for more information.
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HRC Fertility The Fight
REACH PARENTHOOD Reach us to Reach Parenthood! ALL ENCOMPASSING FERTILITY TREATMENT UNDER THE CARE OF THE BEST REPRODUCTIVE FERTILITY SPECIALISTS
REACH PARENTHOOD provides various procedures for same sex couples interested in becoming parents. At Reach Parenthood we understand the frustrations and adversity that can arise when trying to start a family as a same sex couple, but we are proud to be a close ally as you embark on this life-changing journey. So don’t wait any longer! You too can become a parent and there is no better time than now!
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GROUPS COMPILED BY MARCUS KNIGHT
ASIAN/PACIFIC GAYS AND FRIENDS www.apgf.org GAY ASIAN PACIFIC SUPPORT NETWORKwww.gapsn.org LOS ANGELES GAY AVIATION CLUB Pilots, Flights Attendants, Mechanics. www.unusualattitudes.info CLUB NUR Gay Middle Eastern clubnur.com GAY MEN’S CHORUS OF LOS ANGELES www.gmcla.org THANK GAYS IT’S FRIDAY STANDUP COMEDY Every Friday, 8:30pm. MJ’s Bar, 2810 Hyperion Avenue, Los Angeles. 323-650-1503 GAY & LESBIAN SALSA Every Monday, 8pm. Little Temple Bar, 4519 Santa Monica Blvd., Silverlake, 90029. gaysalsanight@yahoo.com or www.facebook.com/ gaysalsanight GAY TRAFFIC SCHOOL Third Tuesday and Wednesday of everymonth,6-10pm The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N. McCadden Place, Los Angeles 90038. 1-800-Gay-4-You or www.laglc.org POP LUCK CLUB Second Sunday of every month, 11am. Locations vary. Los Angeles based organization for Gay Dads, Prospective Dads, and their families. www.popluckclub.org.
FRIDAY, MAY 18 LACMA FILM SERIES 5905 Wilshire Blvd., Los Angeles. For more info call 323-857-6010, or visit lacma.org
Screenings of various film noir classics throughout the month of May, including “THE CRIMSON KIMONO.” SATURDAY, MAY 19 AN EVENING WITH WOMEN The Beverly Hilton Hotel, 9876 Wilshire Blvd. Beverly Hills. 6pm. . For more info: aneveningwithwomen.org
LA Gay & Lesbian Center event. Join Courtney Love, Linda Perry, and Wanda Sykes for an elegant evening with some of the most influential women in music and entertainment. LONG BEACH PRIDE Festival: May 19 & 20, from 11am – 10pm. Parade: May 20, 10:30am. For more information visit longbeachpride.com
Seven different dance areas, plenty of food, booze, shopping, with Queen Latifah headlining the main stage Saturday night. SUNDAY, MAY 20 CALIFORNIA MUSIC FESTIVAL & AIDS WALK Griffith Park and the Greek Theater, 2pm-9pm. For more information visit walkeatdance.org
Walk. Eat. Dance. Benefiting AIDS Healthcare Foundation, in collaboration with radio station K-EARTH 101. TUESDAY, MAY 22 FREE BREAST CANCER FORUM L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center, The Village at Ed Gould Plaza 1125 N. McCadden Place, Los Angeles. 6pm. For more info visit: lagaycenter.org/susanlove.
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Prominent researcher Dr. Susan Love will highlight the latest news about women’s health and breast cancer research, including research about breast cancer risk in lesbians, bisexual women and transgender people. FRIDAY, MAY 25 AA & AL-ANON RECOVERY CONVENTION Burbank Marriott Convention Center. May 25-28. For more info: www.AALAroundup.org
For the LGBT community and friends. Featuring workshops, banquets, speaker meetings, drag shows, raffles, dance parties, and surprise entertainment.
PROSTATE CANCER SUPPORT GROUP 1st and 3rd Tuesday of each month, at the Gay & Lesbian Center. RSVP to Dennis@malecare.org or call 323-860-7340 GREAT AUTOS OF YESTERYEAR The largest LGBT classic car club on the West Coast. www.greatautos.org LOS ANGELES PRIME TIMERS Social group for older mature gay men and admirers www.laprimetimers.org LOS ANGELES GAY BRIDGE CLUB http://www.communityvisions.org/IAGLBC LOS ANGELES GAY/LESBIAN SCIENTISTS www.lagls.org
SATURDAY, MAY 26
LOS ANGELES GAY FOR GOOD Gays making a commitment to volunteer for social welfare and environmental service projects. www.gayforgood.org
2012 JUBILEE MUSIC AND ARTS FESTIVAL
LOS ANGELES GAY NATURISM California Men Enjoying Naturism cmen.info
Sunset Junction (Santa Monica Blvd. and Sunset Blvd.), Silverlake. May 26-28. For more info: www.jubilee.is
LA’s premier music, arts and food festival, will feature 35+ bands, 15+ food trucks, 75+ craft vendors, 40+ comedians and performers, as well as beer, wine and mixed drinks. SATURDAY, JUNE 9 LOS ANGELES PRIDE West Hollywood. Festival: Saturday, June 9, Parade: Sunday, June 10. For more info: www. lapride.org
Festival at West Hollywood Park, on San Vicente Blvd. from Santa Monica Blvd. to Melrose Ave. Parade starts at 11am. on Sunday and travels westbound along Santa Monica Blvd., from Crescent Heights Blvd., to the main entrance of the LA Pride Festival at San Vicente Blvd. EMAIL YOUR EVENT OR GROUP editor@thefightnag.com
BI-OSPHERE P.O.V. Every 2nd Wednesday, 8-9:30pm. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7302 M-F between 6-9pm. Topicdriven discussion for women and men who identify as, or are exploring bisexuality. MEN’S SPEAKEASY Every Tuesday at 8pm. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7302. Fun, alternative space for gay and bisexual men to meet and make new friends. LGBT BOOK CLUB First Wednesday of each month, 7:30-9:30 p.m. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7302, M-F between 6-9pm USC LAMBDA LGBT ALUMNI ASSOCIATION alumnigroups.usc.edu/lambda/ LOS ANGELES BLACK PRIDE www.myblackpridela.com GREATER PASADENA AID FUND www.greaterpasadenaaidfund.org POSITIVE IMAGES WORKSHOP Every Monday, from 7-9pm. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. If you’re looking for ways to deal with HIV, the Live Life
Better Workshop can help you learn coping skills, build a support system, and work toward your health goals. An RSVP is required. For more information or to reserve your place, call 323-860-7321. The e-mail contact is positiveimages@ lagaycenter.org. TRANSGENDER PERCEPTIONS Every Friday, 8pm. The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323860-7302 M-F between 6-9pm. Social networking group offers a safe and welcoming opportunity for people of any age and gender identity to learn from others and to share experiences. GET CENTERED Meditation Class, Every Saturday, 1011am, $10. Gay & Lesbian Center, 1625 N Schrader Blvd. Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7300 SENIORS SERVICES Ongoing, The Village at Ed Gould Plaza, 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7359. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SUPPORT Ongoing, L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center, 1625 N Schrader Blvd. Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-5806. MPOWERMENT WEEKLY WORKSHOPS Tuesdays and fridays, 6pm. Apla, 3550 wilshire blvd, suite 300, los angeles. More info: donta morrison, tel: 213.201.1561 For young gay men of color -- ages 18 thru 24 -- looking for a safe place to hang out. “Each week offers a great opportunity to vent, laugh, make friends, and simply celebrate who you are.” SUPPORT FOR HIV-POSITIVE WOMEN Second and fourth wednesdays, 7pm. The david geffen center, 611 south kingsley drive, los angeles. More info: call women at risk at 310-204-1046. SOCAL SOCIAL CLUB: For more info: www.Socalsocialclub.Com Southern california’s social & business network for lgbt professionals
12 STEP GROUPS All groups meet at The Village at Ed Gould Plaza 1125 N McCadden Place, Los Angeles. For more information, call 323-860-7302 M-F between 6-9pm. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS Mondays, 6:10-7:10 p.m.
CRYSTAL METH ANONYMOUS Saturdays, 9:10-10:10 a.m. DEBTORS ANONYMOUS Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m. MARIJUANA ANONYMOUS Wednesdays, 8:15-9:45 p.m. Saturdays, 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS Wednesdays, 7-8 p.m. SEXUAL COMPULSIVES ANONYMOUS Mondays, 8-9 p.m. Tuesdays, 8-9 p.m. Wednesdays, 8-9 p.m. Thursdays, 8:15-9:15 p.m. Saturdays, 12:15-1:45 p.m. WOMEN’S NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS Saturdays, Noon-1 p.m.
SPORTS LOS ANGELES LESBIAN SOFTBALL www.lagaysoftball.com LOS ANGELES LESBIAN TACKLE FOOTBALL www.californiaquakefootball.com LOS ANGELES LESBIAN RUGBY http://www.eaglerockrugby.com WOMEN’S SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA GOLF www.womensgolf.org/wscga LOS ANGELES LESBIAN POKER http://www.lalpg.com LOS ANGELES WOMEN ON A ROLL Luncheons, Comedy Nights, and Conversation Groups. www.womenonaroll.com LOS ANGELES GAY RODEO CLUB www.gsgra.org LOS ANGELES GAY FLAG FOOTBALL http://www.laflagfootball.com There’s also lesbian tackle football. WEST HOLLYWOOD GAY RUGBY www.larebellion.org LOS ANGELES POOL LEAGUE Friendly Billiard teams www.lapl8ball.com GAY & LESBIAN BOWLING LEAGUE www.tavernguildleague.com SAGA LA Gay Ski & Snowboard Club www.sagala.org V.O.I.L.A. Volleyball www.lagayvolleyball.com GREAT OUTDOORS The largest gay outdoor recreational organization in Southern California.
www.greatoutdoorsla.org GAY AND LESBIAN SIERRANS Camping, Outdoors, Hiking angeles.sierraclub.org CHEER LA Cheerleading www.cheerla.org LA ROWING www.larowing.org DIFFERENT SPOKES Cycling www.differentspokes.com Rides start in various locations in the greater Los Angeles area. SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA BLADES Ice Hockey www.bladeshockey.com LOS ANGELES FRONTRUNNERS Running and walking club www.lafrontrunners.com WEST HOLLYWOOD SOCCER CLUB www.gaysoccer.com Comfortable, supportive environment for learning and playing the world’s most popular game. LOS ANGELES GAY SCUBA CLUB www.barnaclebusters.org LOS ANGELES GAY ROCK CLIMBING www.lalgbtclimbing.com WEST HOLLYWOOD AQUATICS Swim and Water Polo Teams www.wh2o.org
WORSHIP METROPOLITAN COMMUNITY CHURCH mccla.org 4953 Franklin Avenue Los Angeles, CA 90027 BETH CHAYIM CHADASHIM SYNAGOGUE bcc-la.org 6090 West Pico Boulevard Los Angeles, CA 90035 KOL AMI REFORM SYNAGOGUE kol-ami.org 1200 North La Brea Avenue West Hollywood, CA 90038 FIRST CONGREGATIONAL CHURCH OF LOS ANGELES fccla.org 540 South Commonwealth Avenue Los Angeles, CA 90020 HOLLYWOOD UNITED METHODIST CHURCH hollywoodumc.org 6817 Franklin Avenue Los Angeles, CA 90028 HOLY SPIRIT
holyspirit-la.org 4201 West Sunset Blvd. Los Angeles, CA 90029 UNITED UNIVERSITY CHURCH uniteduniversitychurch.org 817 West 34th St Los Angeles, CA 90089 DIGNITY CENTER dignitylosangeles.org 126 South Avenue 64 Los Angeles, CA 90042 HOPE LUTHERAN CHURCH-HLYWD hopelutheranchurch.net 6720 Melrose Ave Los Angeles, CA 90038 WEST HOLLYWOOD PRESBYTERIAN wehopres.org 7350 W Sunset Blvd Los Angeles, CA 90046 MOUNT HOLLYWOOD CONGREGATIONAL CHURCH mthollywood.org 4607 Prospect Avenue Los Angeles, CA 90027 IMMANUEL PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH immanuelpres.org 3300 Wilshire Blvd Los Angeles, CA 90010 ST. MATTHEW’S LUTHERAN CHURCH stmatthewsnoho.org 11031 Camarillo St. North Hollywood, CA 91602 CHRIST CHAPEL OF THE VALLEY christchapel.com 11050 Hartsook Street North Hollywood, CA 91601 ST. PAUL’S LUTHERAN CHURCH stpaulssm.org 958 Lincoln Boulevard Santa Monica, CA 90403 ST. MONICA CATHOLIC COMMUNITY stmonica.net 725 California Avenue Santa Monica, CA 90403 WEHO CHURCH wehochurch.com 916 N. Formosa Ave. West Hollywood, CA 90046 ST. VICTOR’S CATHOLIC CHURCH saintvictor.org 8634 Holloway Drive West Hollywood, California 90069 ST. LUKE LUTHERAN stlukelutheran.com 5312 Comercio Way Woodland Hills, CA 91364
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claim that he is “evolving.” It’s bordering on ludicrous. Obama’s closet on gay marriage is about as well-guarded as Liberace’s was on being gay. And, says Signorile, it’s time for Obama to now kick down the closet door. “It’s no longer a matter of whether he can or should. He must if he wants to win the election.”
“Some people ask, If everyone assumes Obama secretly supports gay marriage, why does he need to say it? Because staying in the closet makes him look scared and dishonest. It keeps him on the defensive and far behind his party -- not to mention behind Dick Cheney and Laura Bush.”
OBAMA’S
CLOSET
MICHELANGELO SIGNORILE: “OBAMA’S CLOSET ON GAY MARRIAGE IS ABOUT AS WELL-GUARDED AS LIBERACE’S WAS ON BEING GAY”
O
bama is very much in a closet on gay marriage even though he’s been outed several times, says Michelangelo Signorile, Editor-at-large at HuffPost Gay Voices and SiriusXM radio host. Like others who’ve been outed, his past came back to haunt, in his case when a questionnaire surfaced from 1996. The White House spin and denials have been as comical as former Senator Larry Craig trying to explain he had a “wide stance,” wrote Signorile in an oped in The Huffington Post last month. Everyone, including his enemies, knows Obama supports gay marriage, to the point where there is uproarious laughter when TV commentators are sitting around discussing Obama’s
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“Playing it safe doesn’t win elections in the current political environment,” states Signorile. “Just ask the Democrats, who lost the House in 2010 because they were so fearful of making bold moves on the issues on which they were elected in 2008, while Republicans acted as if they’d won all along and galvanized the Tea Party-inspired base. The president himself seems to be realizing this on economic issues, finally drawing a bright line between him and the Republicans after four years of playing it safe to the point where he was about to give away the store.” “There are two things happening now that will make the president seem more disingenuous, fearful and weak if he does not come out for marriage equality,” says Signorile. “His own party is moving at light speed on the issue, with pressure mounting to include marriage equality in the Democratic Party platform.” “Secondly,” states Signorile, “Mitt Romney is now emerging as the sure Republican nominee, a man who supports ‘gay rights’ but not ‘gay marriage’ -- in other words, in the broad brush of politics and the media, having the same position as Obama. And you better believe, just like his buddy Chris Christie did, Romney will say that. Yes, of course it’s not true when you look at the details. And true, Romney has veered far to the right in the primaries. But Romney is whipping out the Etch A Sketch as we speak, and our media can’t be counted on to stop him from erasing the past and keeping the details submerged.” “Some people ask, If everyone assumes Obama secretly supports gay marriage, why does he need to say it? Because staying in the closet makes him look scared and dishonest. It keeps him on the defensive and far behind his party -- not to mention behind Dick Cheney and Laura Bush. And it depresses energy. The campaign surely wants to tap into the youth vote it galvanized in 2008, and certainly an issue like this, a civil rights issue of our time and one that is a driving force on college campuses, is the way to go.” “Obama and his campaign need to stop the fretting and the fear -- the cowering in the closet -- and get back to the bold message of, ‘Yes, we can!’”
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