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Letter from the Editors:
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Welcome to the first edition of LIPS AppState: Expressions of Female Sexuality zine! Already established at William & Mary, VT, VCU, & the City of Richmond, LIPS seeks to provide an alternative to the commodification and restriction of female sexuality pervasive in corporate women's magazine and mass media. At our meetings, we encourage members and visitors to express their sexuality in whatever manner they please. We saw a space at Appalachian for this kind of expression and discussion, and starting this clubfzine has been amazing. In our first semester, we have generated a lot of interest, brought together a fantastically radical group of people, held AppState's first ever SlutWalk, and are now publishing our first zine! We have been featured multiple times in The 路 Appalachian and High Country Press and garnered support from the Appalachian and Boone communities. For our first ever zine, we chose the topic Forbidden Desires. Women are often told that they are bad for having sex, not having sex, having sex at the "wrong" time, having sex in the "wrong" place, or the "wrong" way. We felt that this theme would be inclusive of many female identified persons ( experiences and desires because there is no wrong way to express one's sexuality. We hope you enjoy the first edition of LIPS AppState: Expressions of Female Sexuality! LIPS Love, ~
Dayne Alexander
Elizabeth Penick
Irisoi Gonza ~
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Got questions? Or want to join LIPS Appstate next semester? Email us!
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I mean, I'll settle for Daniel Radcliffe, or even a guy wearing Potter-esk glasses.
I want to bang him in the library stacks, and have to be really quiet because we're in the restricted section. I want to have nowhere to bang him, so the Room of Requirement appears. T want
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us to pull each other's hair out and make polyjui;lotion;
so that I can be him, banging him as me.
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RELAX. "Relax," she said. Relax. Chill. Slow down.
onfi lY CLASSROOM!
That's what she should've said.
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Third grade. Third fucking grade. How could I have known? No one told me. No one. I just wanted to feel good. To feel. That pulsing. That beating. That rub~ rub, rubbing, Legs kicking, Heels clapping, Together. Gripping tightly on the edge of my wide-slotted desk. Every day. Every fucking day. I fucked me. My third grade self. Fucked me. Fucked myself. Leaning so hard, Third grade clit, rubbing on group table, Group working on project table.
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....
41
Until I came. I didn't know what cum was but I did. Every day. Gasping, Falling, Panting, (Slowly, subtly, secretly) Back down into the blue plastic school chair.
-
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"Relax," she said. Relax. . Chill. Slowdown. Stop. CALL. CALL MY PARENTS. Call my parents why don't you. . Tell them how I couldn't "relax" in class. Tell them why. And shame. So much shame. When l learned what I was doing was "wrong". (Dirty, filthy, sinful) "Here's some books," they said. "And if you want to do it again," they said, "Hide. Do it at home. In bed. Bedroom door
In twelfth grade, a whore. In college, a slut. "Relax," she said . Relax. They say. 路 Chill out. Slowdown. Stop . . Stop what you're doing.
I love sex with strangers. I love the mystery of it. I want to have one night, one memory to add to my collection. I love sex with friends, for it to spontaneously happen in the afternoon. I love sex with women. I love sex With men. I love sex with women and men. I love private sex and public sex. I I love sex. .. .... -... There are so many different reasons to have sex .. ' so many types of sex to have, w so many people to have it with. ~ I yearn to be able to experience, to touch r· ·· -·-,-.. and look at J: l and taste everything. I want to be free, J: without judging eyes piercing through me, ~ without crude slurs weighing me down, without labels boxing me in. I desire to be sexual me.
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I'm reflected back through your smoke filled as the sky swirls around. Lingering in shadows, touches unfathomed in the li leave traces on me now. And I know that she can the heavy air left in the room. She catches the passing clanct;:s J that we can't control. And I'm held outside your debating my next move.
First Time for Everything .
~_I was 17._ -. rl~l-~ fl~...-...-T~r when I firSt fell f<)f a gul. It happened m an mstant, leavmg me Iand chilled all at the same time; I was confused, yet enlightened. Scared, but oddly War~
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cunous . The suddenness and simplicity of my affections confused me to no end. It started on a chilly autumn morning . I had just dressed out for my second period weight training class and was walking along with the kids that happened to be in the other Physical Education classes. We were headed towards the gym, where the teachers decided that it would be a good idea to combine all of the PE,students to "warm up" and do ridiculous stretches. Had I wanted to make myself look like an idiot in front of a gym full of people,_ I would have tried out for the school play. I digress. ·
--
41
. .Iz: --· had liked only guys up until this point, and I had already had a few relationships with them. In fact, I was currently IN a relationship with a boy. Until this defining moment, I had never questioned my sexuality . I now recall something my mother had said a few years earlier, while driving me and my brother home from shopping, "I don't ~ -- even know why someone would choose to live that way [the LGBT lifestyle]. I'm telling you and your brother right now, it's a difficult life. Just don't. .. don't partake in any of that." As a fifteen year old I had thought it was a stupid thing for anyone to say, but I was~ • ~ absolutely certain would never have to worry about being queer anyways.. .
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lingered for a moment as she smiled politely at me, then turned back towards the t.. instructor, who was furiously blowing that confounded whistle (I became numb to the ~ stinging whistle after a few weeks, which is more than I can say for her incredible smile) . Everything from her adorable freckles to her beautifully toned legs made me want her. I had an incredible urge to ask what her name was, to find out what year she was, and just hear Her.voice. •:::a:r..-,~.
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Suddenly I felt sick with confusion. I had never felt such an unrelenting , immediate crush on any guy, and the way I was suddenly feeling for her made me ~ wonder. I was straight ... wasn't I? I was a good Christian, so why was I letting myself have these sudden bursts of feelings for another girl? (I learned later that loving God has nothing to do with sexual orientation- but that's another rant for another time). The warmth of my desire was mixing with the icy fear of the unknown, making a nervous, terrifying concoction inside of my stomach. ~-•rrr·n-"~•y_,,___.,RiJj ~· 1 rg~LL '..1- LLL. ll..,,__ fl 1- •L t::l ~ I ~ Nervously I inched away towards the other side of the gym I didn't want thos~ feelings ... did I? · U:r::'&DJT ~l\0:: ~~·":'" IITI 1 ' ~ .. /0 · · ·. · ~- ··· I
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Throughout the period, I continually caught myself staring at her. I think she noticed once , and her pale green eyes made me breathless. She had a natural, unique beauty about her. Not the general hot babe that turns out to be a pampered, bitchy drama ~ queen; she had a modest sweetness about her. She was very small, both in height and proportions . And when she ran ... I couldn't keep my eyes from wandering. Her gait was · beautiful ; the way her hair flowed behind her, the way her small breasts bounced, and how her legs tensed with every step made me revel in certain thoughts I never dreamed I could But my thoughts terrified me .
. - She would absolutely hate me.
IF And even if she wasn't straight... My parents would hate me~ My friends could never know. I didn't even want to feel this way.;
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tried to push her from my mind as I went changed back into normal clothes. As I calculated 11 for the bell curves in my Advanced Functions and Modeling class. As I held my boyfriend's hand on the trip to my car after school. As I stared at the ceiling that night, trying to go to sleep.
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that what was happening to me wasn't wrong. But I couldn't tell my boyfriend. I didn't know how my best friends would feel. My parents were out of the question . And so I was silent._
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" one day now, i_n one of my classes or on the street, I doubt my attraction would still stand· but the memory of my first girly crush is now and forever shall be hammered into my _ ~rain.It taught me to love my~elffor who I am . •_ -~- ~ j Silent ~s I watched her flirt with the macho boys in my class that wanted nothing but a, ... . ,_ 4 fOOd piece of ass to stare at. Silent as I wished so desperatei-:fo';""-h \ ( adorable, perfect face. Y a c an~ to hold her and kiss every freckle on her ~~T _ Sil: as'= heart was wrenched with confusion, brokenness; and shame.
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I could write pages of what I thought of her. But that wouldn't be the point. She may be gone from my life now, but she sparked something within me that couldn't be extinguished. I found a part of myself that I never knew I had. Something I'm beginning to become proud of. With the help of my amazing friends I was able to overcome my fear of my attraction to both male and female alike, and even embrace it. If she showed up
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I want that hard, raunchy sex, that has animalistic undertones~ I want to be fucked, I want you to fuck me and mean it. I want to see that look on your face of primal desire, where you like you can't get enough of my body and essence. Spread my legs wide, enter inside so that we can feel the tides of ethereal ecstasy. Touch me in that sweet spot and make me moan. Pull my hair, expose my neck, bite but bite hard. Grab me with and slam me onto you. CONSUIVIE IVIE,
PLEASE IVIE, FUCK IVIE.
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.The Female Prostatae
"A garden enclosed is my beloved my s 路A 路 Solomon 4:12 KJB ' pouse, spnng shut up, a fountain ready to burst" -Song of Women have baffled society for centuries. Psychologically and physically, the experts seemingly cannot defme what fully constitutes a woman. Despite advancements in medical research, and a more sexually liberal society, the complex body of a woman is still deeply misunderstood. While the standard ma).e and female reproductive systems have been studied in classrooms around the globe, there is one part of the female's body that is still being regarded to as a "phenomenon"- the female prostate. Historical works from Aristotle, the Kama Sutra, and the Christian Bible have referenced the female locus. Women of all cultures have repeatedly corroborated its existence, and many bold doctors have attested to its actuality. However, the term "female prostate" was not officially coined by the Federative Committee on Anatomical Terminology until 2001(Moalem 2). Although there has been a general consensus regarding the carnal similarities to the male prostate, the actual structure, purpose, and function of this supposed "mystery" has been tip-toed around for centuries. What this research hopes to present is a condensed report regarding the female prostate, and its bona fide status as an active and useful accessory organ in thefemale's urogenital system. In order to explain the controversy regarding the female prostate, one must first understand the defmition of prostate. Medical history has widely acknowledged the prostate as part of the male anatomy. Defmed as a "gland within the male reproductive system that is located just below the bladder," the prostate surrounds the beginning of the urethra (like a douglmut), and is encased by a fibromuscular sheet, which contracts to help expel a milky-white mucoid substance called semen (MedicineNet.com). The semen then mixes with the sperm produced by the testes via the vas deferens. The combined fluids then leave the body through the prostatic urethr~. in a process known as ejaculation. (Bennett 2). However, what the medical world has failed to elaborate on is the fact that most females also have a prostate, and thus are also capable of ejaculation. Perhaps this denial stems from the lack of sperm in the female's ejaculatory fluids . Considered unnecessary for reproduction, the smaller female prostate glands have been significantly dismissed. This acquiescence has led society to view the existence of the female prostate as a triviality. According to the Journal of Sex Research, "[f]he female prostate has been considered only a rudimentary and an insignificant, vestigial structure" (Zaviacic 1). Some doctors are so adamant about the atrophied nature of the female "prostate", that they refuse to even term it as such, and still refer to the glands surrounding the female urethra as the Skene's glands. David Davies, former president of the Royal College of Pathologists, says, the glandulous tissues located along the females urethra are "really inactive, turnedoff tissues, they're dead-end cells". As far as what Mr. Davies prefers to call these glandulous organs, "Skene's glands are good enough [for him]" (Robotham 2). Further critics include Dr. Alfred Kinsey, author of Sexual Behavior in the Human Female (1953), who firmly stated "since the prostate gland and seminal vesicles are only vestigial structures in the female, she does not actually ejaculate" (qtd. in Bennett 7) . Despite the medical dissention, thousand.$ of women (and some men) still regard the female prostate as an active organ. In fact, studies of coital res~es have established more similarities than differences ,between the male and female prostatic glands. Similar to the male, most females have prostatic tissue surrounding the urethra. Also known as the Skene s glands, or the paraurethral glands, these urogenital structures are scattered along the leng~ of the urethra, which is adjacent to the vagina's anterior wall. One very well- known German gynecologtst, Dr. Ernst Griifenberg, wrote a paper in 19.50 describing the area of the vagina adjacent to the urethra as an "erotic zone". He went on to say the "female urethra also seems to be surrounded by erectile tissues like the corpora cavemosa," and that "in the course of sexual stimulation, the female urethra be~ to e~arge and can be easily felt" (qtd. in Bennett 8). This spot, dubbed the Grafenburg Spot (G-Spot), 1s the pomt of f
...
41
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stimulation for the female prostate. Of course, Terrence Hines, a psychologist from Pace University, wrote that "there was no evidence in the designated area of sufficient nerve endings for the G-spot to be 'anatomically real"' (Zaviacic 2). Mr. Hines compared the G-spot to "cold-fusion quasi-phenomena" '(Zaviacic 2). (\_ • Dr. Grafenburg went into further detail of the "phenomenon" of female ejaculation as he described, "the l convulsory production_of fluids occurs always at the acme of the orgasm .. . one~ that large quantities t ~ of clear transparent fllllds are expelled not from the vulva, but out the urethra iDgushes .. sometimes at \.fV'\/'\ !'. ~eat distances" (Bennet 8). Grafenburg was not the only reno~ed doctor to ent these cases of -Te"male ejaculation; 17th century Dutch physician Regnier Graaf poted, "the (female] urethra is lined ~ internally b~ a ~-membrane. In the low~r part... ~he memb:ane is ?ierced by lacunae [large ducts], 51(£: f '\J through which pitUito-serous matter occaswnally discharges m considerable quantities" into the urethra (9). ·7' He further described the "whitish, membranous substance about one finger-breadth thick which completely ~ surrounds the urethral canal" (9). Dr. Graaf even went so far as to name the "pituito-serous juice" expelled during ejaculation as "female semen" (qtd. in Bennett 9). Of course the critics of the female prostate have other theories regarding the origins of female sexual fluids. One of the first signs of coital readiness in a woman is vaginal wetness. So where do these pre-climatic fluids come from? Some medical scholars claim that all vaginal fluids, including those emitted during ejaculation, come from the cervix. (Bennet 5). Located slightly below and to the left and right of the vagina are the Bartholin's glands, which do secrete a mucoid substance. However, according to the fmdings by renowned sex researchers Masters and Johnson, these glands "generally consist of only a few 41 drops" (Bennet 6). The Bartholin's glands produce just enough lubrication to keep the labial opening moist for comfort during initial contact. Based on studies, it is understood that female ejaculation occurs at the climax of sexual arousal. Once the Bartholin's glands were ruled out as a source of ejaculatory fluids, many hypothesized that these fluids are produced from the pores in the vaginal walls. When a woman experiences orgasm her vaginal muscles contract often forcing vaginal fluids out. Masters and Johnson both agree that "individual secretions of transudation-like mucoid material appear scattered throughout the rugal folds of the normal vaginal architecture"; However, they also agree that this "sweating" of the vagina (even as profuse as it can be) cannot be the source of the fluids during female ejaculation (Bennet 6). Their observations were simple - women who have had a hysterectomy (an absence of womb and cervix) still reported having experienced ejaculation; The critics quickly retorted with claims that the fluid emitted from the female urethra during orgasm is simply urine. Probably one of the longest standing theories regarding female ejaculation was that the fluids were a sign of urinary incontinence. Even Freud himself said, "female genital wetness, as equated with dirtiness, was a source of disgust. .. Female fluids had come to be considered as abnormal" (qtd. in Bennet 17). In fact, many women have undergone urmecessary medical procedures such as estrogen treatments and surgery to cure their supposed urinary incontinence (Zaviacic 2). However, clinical studies performed in 1981 and ( 1988 included a chemical analysis of the female ejaculatory fluid. Beverly Whipple and John Perry ~ '-... reported" . . . very low levels of urea and creatinine, the two main chemical hallmarks of urine" (Moalem cf . • 2). On the other hand, what the analysis did fmd was extremely high levels of fructose . Dr. Zaviacic L.J0 ,l V) reports that "[t]he fructose in the female ejaculate has the potential for providing an important function to ~ ~ the reproductive proces an ad · · energy source for spermatozoa mobility" (Zaviacic 2). In other (~~ .) f - words, female seme helps give energy· male sperm. Dr. Zaviacic's report cfearly contradicts any v) ~ ~ prevailing beliefs that fe e semen oes ~ot s~rve any purpose ~n h~ reproduction. .. ( Despite the extensive studies summarized m this research, there IS still one more group of cntlcs who do ") ~ not believe in female ejaculation. Unfortunately, this group consist~ of women~? hav~ never . D ~rienced true ejaculation. Although the~e may be many fa~t~rs mvolved reg~ding this lack of prostatic stimulation, some differences are more obviOus than others. Sinlilar to men, the siZe and shape of fue prostatic glands can vary significantly from woman to woman, as well as the location and numbe~ of f-:\ lacunae present. Furthermore, biopsies do reveal that not all women have prostatic glands. Also Important \::.Y to note is that"... these ducts may be less exposed in virgins and nulliparas" (a woman who has never
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birthed a child) (Bennett 14). Mothers of two or more children report more ejaculatory experiences than those who have never birthed a child. 1bis is because-the-birthing process may cause a "distortion and a flattening of the urethral eminence with evbrSion ·or the distal urethral mucosa" (Bennet 15). Simply put, the ducts are more exposed after childbirth. In addition, Griifenburg and Graaf both noted that ejaculation "is more likely to be observed if the ducts happen to be anatomically exposed and are without geometrical constraints imposed by a majority of coital positions" (Bennet 14). The ancient Indian text, The Kama Sutra, which stresses the importance of~~sitioO§)during sexual intercourse, concurs with this study. Do women have a prostate homologous t o e e prostate and capable of eJacula1Ion? Based on the conclusive evidences of this 300 year old research, it can be detennined, tha~ many fortunate women are capable of a sexual climax equivalent to that of men. The glandulous ac~cy organs, although significantly smaller than a male's, are bona fide accessory organs of the female urogenital system. Regrettably, to this day many anatomy textbook diagrams do not even acknowledge the presence of the female prostate; or if they do, it is often erroneously referred to as vestigial remnants of the embryonic "male" stage of female development. Rarely is attention given to the significance of the feJiale prostate, thus perpetuating a disturbing ignorance to the populations. If women are undereducated in ~ regards to their own anatomy, harmful results can occur. Women may undergo unnecessary medical p procedures to cure "urinary incontinence", when in fact they were simply experiencing prostatic . ejaculation. Even more distnrbing, they may feel "abnormal." While the medical world has only recently ~ acknowledged, and subsequently temied the Female Prostatae, we are still years away from enlightenment . regarding the phenomena of women. ~· Georgia Bowen, Class of 2012 ~
8D
Bennett, J. Lowndes Sevely and J.W. "Concerning Female Ejacualation and the Female Prostate." The • Journal Of Sex Research Vol. 14 No. 1 (Feb 1978): 1-20. MedicineNet.com. MedicineNet.com. 26 November 2009. 26 November 2009 <http:>.<ihttp:> Moalem, Sharon. "''Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Female Ejaculation"·" New Scien!ist 202.2710 (2009): 31. Robotham, Julie. Medical Write~- ""Bad News, Boys: The Female Prostate may be the New GSpot"." The Sydney Morning Herald Ne~sp~per Source Plus, 5 October 2002. Zaviacic, Milan, and Be~rly Whipple. "''Update on the Femaie-Prostate and the Phenomenon of Female Ejaculation." Journal of Sex Research 30.2 (1993): 148-151 ~ -,.....·-
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Forbidden Desire Submission for LIPS from a freshman that doesn't wish to be known by name. Girl on the bus
J.Wow, how I'm longing for you
I sit listening to the monotonous drone of this bus __ : . ... ~ Only wishing to hear the lively beat of your heart. I know nothing about you except for your smile, your denim shorts, your silky jacket, and your beautiful hair. , The way you never play with the same strand because every movement causes a n; w layer te~come Tnto viee,=w;;: , ..__,_ _ _ _""''-··· - - - - - - - - - - - -. . . the sheer volume is entrancing, how enticingthe invitation to get lost in your hair, to have it draped over my .eyes and laced in mine in a secret embrace between the two ofus. ,
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~I to somehow make all these thoughts known to you, but our trip isn't over, the risk that I might not be reciprocated is too much and for the rest ofthe ride every glance risks being noticed arid shunned. My desire is chained only to these words and my own teasing imagination. The familiar longing mixes with the slightest of ache in the usual places. th·ere a chance that you might be interested in me for my body as I am for yours? Have you once in these past few hours glanced at me with nothing but raw ~esire and appreciation? ·
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Constantly wanting something more
The way my lips are on yours and 1can feel offyour...
How the wetness on myjeans d;ipping offofyou makes my t~ngue ache for those sweeter lips. -
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the way l can.feel your heart heat on my lips when my mouth isfoil ifyour
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having no idea ofmy
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