SNAP&SCRAN by leah arkle

SNAP SCRAN LIMITED EDITION 2015

OUI CHEF In this day and age, every other student in college wants to be a chef, a food artist, the creator of an edible heaven; but are they aware of the realities of working in a kitchen that’s throwing out 300 covers a day? Do their tutors at college explain how their days as chefs will consist of early mornings, relentless food prep, unbearable heat, stressful services and stupidly late nights? Are they told that they can forget their weekends off and that the only time they’ll really get to socialise is after work at silly o’clock, or, on days off when all their friends are at work?

“IF YOU CAN’T STAND THE HEAT, GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN” - Harry S Truman.

Being a chef has been glamourised by the celebrity chefs that appear on television, where most of the ‘behind the scenes’ malarky is kept off camera and most of what is aired is scripted. Does this not mean that young people are planning their lives, careers and futures on something that is potentially hypothetical? A professional kitchen can break a man (or woman) if their hands, feet and tongue aren’t quick enough. The need for stamina, speed and believe it or not, banter, is as essential in a kitchen as oxygen. If the chefs aren’t motivated and raring to go you might as well kiss goodbye to that successful service. The honest truth of it is that being a chef is hard; it’s a strenuous, exhausting, stressful, sweaty job in which only the strong survive. Although it’s portrayed as an incredibly profitable industry, the people who actually work within it do not see that profit. Chefs will work 60-70 hour weeks in return for pittance and a thank-you that they’re never likely to get; to get them through this they require determination, passion and tolerance. When tempers are running high, feet are aching after running around for 12 hours and caffeine is wearing off, it takes every ounce of self control not to scream in the faces of the customers who have just sat down, 5 minutes before last orders. Because of the long hours, the strain put on both mind and body, and the stress of the job, many try and fail. But those who stick it out and succeed can’t physically do it for the rest of their lives; it is said that being a chef is a ‘young mans game,’ and it’s true.

Anthony Bourdain, a well known celebrity chef, wrote in his book, ‘Medium Raw,’ “If you’re old, or out of shape - or were never really certain about your chosen path in the first place - then you will surely and quickly be removed. Like a large organism’s natural antibodies fighting off an invading strain of bacteria, the life will slowly push you out or kill you off.” A ‘OUI CHEF’ survey was set up via SurveyMonkey. The survey received 655 responses but due to being unable to access all of the results, only the first 100 were analysed. The first question asked about their age, in order to establish the average age of a chef. The results showed that 49% were between the ages of 23 and 30, 29% were between the ages of 16 and 22, 15% between the ages of 31 and 40, and only 7% were over 41. Aside from the physical strain on the body, working near a grill can be potentially lifethreatening, for reasons other than fire or boiling water. The smoke that is created by cooking meat contains polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs) which are toxic chemicals that can damage the lungs. Just Imagine what happens after years of being a grill chef?

Being able to cook good food does not make a chef, it makes a good cook. Being able to control a kitchen and the paperwork, cook food to a high standard, keep your staff motivated AND keep the ‘Top Dogs’ happy, that’s what makes a good chef.

Chefs range from cocky 17 year old commis’ who can’t chop an onion properly, to 60 year old pizza chefs who are determined not to let their arthritic knees stop them from ploughing through a Saturday night shift. The one’s that stay and succeed are those who are prepared to make sacrifices in their personal lives, show passion for their job and the food that they produce, but most importantly follow the commonly known motto:

ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL Although there are many female chefs, there are definitely more males in the mainstream cooking industry. Chefettes, as they are commonly named, are expected to keep up with the back and forth banter and require incredibly thick skin to put up with the boyish jests that will undoubtedly get hurled their way. Whether you’re male or female, one of the biggest attributes that a chef must have is the ability to act as part of a team and communicate efficiently, because without communication a professional kitchen could not function. It is a common assumption that due to the stresses and strains of working in a restaurant kitchen, that all chefs have an addiction, whether it is alcohol, hard drugs, marijuana or cigarettes. The 6th question asked in the ‘OUI CHEF’ survey was, “Do you take drugs? (including marijuana.)” Of 100 respondents, 61 answered NO, leaving 39 chefs admitting to taking drugs (This question did not include results for drinking alcohol, coffee,or smoking cigarettes.)

Jason Sheehan (Ex chef and Award-winning Food Writer) wrote an article about drug use amongst chefs, available at thedailybeast.com, in which he states, “Chefs are curious. They’re adventurous. They’re risk-takers by nature! The kind of people who would, in fact, eat salad from a stranger in the park. I never knew one who didn’t have some serious impulse-control issues! Who was able to blithely pass up any new thing that passed under his nose.” Anthony Bourdain states in ‘Medium Raw’ that, “Smoking weed at the end of the day is nearly always a good idea! But I’d advise ambitious young cooks against sneaking a few drags mid-shift at Daniel. If you think smoking dope makes you more responsive to the urgent calls for food from your expeditor, then God bless you, you freak of nature you. If you’re anything like me, though, you’re probably only good for a bowl of Crunch-berries and a Simpsons rerun.”

With celebrity chefs openly talking about their own experiences with drug abuse, and on the odd occasion encouraging it, is it any wonder chefs have been turning to narcotics to help them along their chosen career paths?

The next question in the survey was, “Do you smoke cigarettes?” Almost half of the 100 respondents answered YES (48%), the other 52 chefs said that they do not. After doing some further research into why so many chefs smoke, there are a few different theories: 1. It allows them to have a 5 minute break from the stress. 2. Alot of chefs don’t eat much in the kitchen that they work in, and having a cigarette puts hunger at bay. 3. A nicotine rush is similar to the adrenaline rush that so many chefs enjoy during service. 4. It allows them to sit, relax and socialise for a while. 5. It is just a part of their lifestyle. The 8th question of the survey asked, “How often do you drink alcohol?” (Only 98 of the 100 respondents available answered this question.) 35 chefs claimed that they drink alcohol every day, 27 said they only drink on their days off, 17 said they drink alcohol on the weekends and 19 people said that they rarely drink.

Imogen Edwards-Jones interviewed a number of chefs about their experiences and went on to write a book about their answers called ‘Restaurant Babylon.’ Almost half way through the book she writes, “Alcohol is a big problem in this business. It is a major part of it. I mean, you don’t go into the restaurant industry if you haven’t a hint of the epicurean about you. It is not the sort of profession that attracts people who don’t like a good time, who aren’t a little bit greedy, or keen on their booze. I’ve worked with seven head chefs over the past fifteen years and I have taken four of them to open AA meetings.”

The aim of this article is not to scare people away from the industry but to urge young people, who have not yet decided on a career path, to think long and hard about getting themselves into a career revolving around restaurants, because although you might be passionate about food and like the idea of cooking it all day…

IT IS NOT FOR THE FAINT HEARTED

FROM TH E CHEFS MOUT H

You can let your imagination run wild Developing good and appreciated dishes

Being able to do what you love every day AND get paid for it

Coming up with a new dish/menu

Food brings people together

You learn something new every day Eating for free The feeling you get when you NAIL a dish

The banter and passion Being creative with fresh ingredients every day

The camaraderie and solidarity Instant job satisfaction from customer feedback

Working close with good people

It’s like being part of a family The thrill of being in service and everything going right Making customers smile Great customers and crew Being able to create amazing food that people love

U P

P E

R S

“

100 CHEFS ANSWERED THE QUESTION, "WHAT ARE...

“ D

THE BEST AND WORST PARTS ABOUT BEING A CHEF?”

W N

E R S

The hours

Management always think they’re better than they are

Lack of social life

Some of the idiots you have to work with

Working weekends

Made up allergies and diets Emotionally and physically challenging

This job destroys realtionships

Not getting any recognition or appreciation

I AM A HERMIT

Being spoken to like you’re nothing

Poor front of house

Customers being ridiculous

Last minute walk-ins

Missing out on my babies life No paid overtime

Having a broken body

Working all festive holidays

Not enough wife time

DONT MESS WITH CHEF When a waiter, waitress or bartender “messes” with a chef, they are taking a big risk by eating the plate of staff food that’s put in front of them 2 hours later. They see what happens in that kitchen, know what the chefs are capable of, and probably immediately regretted the decision of putting vinegar in their morning coffee. Don’t touch the chicken - chef put ghost chilli’s in the sauce. Don’t touch the mash - chef mixed fairy liquid into it. Don’t touch the carrots - chef put them in the bin first. This is what sometimes happens to the staff… What happens to the customers? Have you ever seen what happens to your food once it’s taken back into the kitchen after you’ve complained about it? As a paying customer, you put a certain level of trust into the employees of the restaurant to serve food the way it should be served, because they are all professionals and take pride in their food… Don’t they? Most chefs think that if food has been dropped on the floor, it’s rightful home is the bin, but a few wayward chefs wouldn’t think twice about throwing it on a plate and sending it your way. The “Oui Chef ” survey was completed by 655 chefs in total, the first 100 responses were analysed and it showed that 10 out of 100 chefs have done something ‘naughty’ to a customers food, and 21% of chefs would send food if it had been dropped on the floor.

FIVE SECOND RULE

NO PROBLEM SIR

SORRY CHEF

THANK YOU

TABLE 23 AWAY

An anonymous chef stated that, “If you drop something and then throw it back on the grill until it reaches the right temperature, of course you can send it, all the bacteria has been cooked off.” Sometimes you find police who accept bribes, sometimes you’ll find a fireman who won’t rescue the cat, sometimes you find a chef who sends food off the floor… For the most part, chefs take a lot of pride in the food that they produce, and for some, a complaint is taken personally. If it’s their fault that something has gone wrong, chances are it will be fixed quickly and to the best of their ability. If it’s the customer being a downright nudnik, they’re probably going to get treated that way. Restaurants are hard work. The staff enter the building at the time “normal” people are going to work, if not earlier, but don’t leave the building until at least an hour after the last customer leaves. That customer would have had the time to go to work, finish work, do the food shop, have a shower, watch some TV, then casually make their way to the restaurant for some dinner. The chef however, has already been stood over the grill for 8 hours before that 7PM booking walks in. There’s a common misconception that only the chefs handle the food until it’s put on plates for the waiters to take to the table. True. But in most restaurants, the chefs will make the desserts on a morning and leave it to the waiters to prepare, plate up and serve. So if you’ve clicked your fingers at the waitress, demanded food, complained about it and generally treated your server as a servant… Ordering dessert might not be the best idea. Treat those around you how you yourself expect to be treated because you never really know what goes on in a restaurant. From a customers point of view, their server is happy and smiley, but that is probably because the first and most important job of the front of house team is to smile and be polite to ensure the customer has a good experience. That same server might have been on their feet for ten hours, running around for minimum wage and stingy tips, being patronised by the customers who think they’re 20 rungs higher on the level of importance in life.

They will smile at you even when you’re rude, because from the second they sign in, it’s all an act. 22