Calgary's Child March/April 2020 by M.L. Ellen Percival

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MAR/APR 2020

Calgarys Child We Are Family

2020

BUMP, BABY & TODDLER GUIDE EARLY-BIRD CAMP FEATURE

D Diaper Bags 101 D Congratulations, You're Pregnant - NOW WHAT? D How to Build Your Village

Plan ahead to make the most of summer!

Spring Flings D Explore D E l Canmore C D +15 Art Adventure Tour D Let's Go Tubing!

Build a

STRESS-BUSTING Kit for YOUR Kids

PLUS Don’t Wake the Baby! Tips to keep the peace GET ROVER READY for a new baby All the Feels – Help little kids manage big feelings 10 EASY STEPS TO BOOST LANGUAGE SKILLS

ARE YOU A 'SNOWPLOW' PARENT?

Maybe your kids actually do belong in a zoo. Spring Camps and PD Day Camps Keep your children active and engaged as they discover the natural world with camps at the Calgary Zoo. Featuring programs for everyone from tots to teens, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re zoo-nique re the most zoo nique camps around! nd! Spaces are re going fast! Register at calgaryzoo.com

rain or shine JOEFRESH.COM 8\HU[P[PLZ HUK VY ZLSLJ[PVU VM P[LTZ TH` IL SPTP[LK HUK TH` UV[ IL H]HPSHISL PU HSS Z[VYLZ 56 9(05*/,*2: 69 :<):;0;<;065: VU JSLHYHUJL P[LTZ VY ^OLYL X\HU[P[PLZ HYL HK]LY[PZLK HZ SPTP[LK (K]LY[PZLK WYPJPUN HUK WYVK\J[ ZLSLJ[PVU Ã&#x2026;H]V\Y JVSV\Y WH[[LYUZ Z[`SL TH` ]HY` I` Z[VYL SVJH[PVU >L YLZLY]L [OL YPNO[ [V SPTP[ X\HU[P[PLZ [V YLHZVUHISL MHTPS` YLX\PYLTLU[Z >L HYL UV[ VISPNH[LK [V ZLSS P[LTZ IHZLK VU LYYVYZ VY TPZWYPU[Z PU [`WVNYHWO` VY WOV[VNYHWO` (WWSPJHISL [H_LZ KLWVZP[Z VY LU]PYVUTLU[HS Z\YJOHYNLZ HYL L_[YH 5V ZHSLZ [V YL[HPS V\[SL[Z :VTL P[LTZ TH` OH]L Â¸WS\Z KLWVZP[ HUK LU]PYVUTLU[HS JOHYNLÂ¹ ^OLYL HWWSPJHISL Â&#x17D; ;4 ;OL [YHKLTHYRZ ZLY]PJL THYRZ HUK SVNVZ KPZWSH`LK PU [OPZ UL^ZWHWLY HK HYL [YHKLTHYRZ VM 3VISH^Z Inc. and others. All rights reserved. Â© 3VISH^Z 0UJ *\Z[VTLY 9LSH[PVUZ!

Calgary’s Child is Everywhere

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Contact Us Phone Number: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .403-241-6066 Email: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . calgaryschild@shaw.ca

calgary’s child

About Us Publisher/Editor: M. L. Ellen Percival Co-Creator: Sherry Kerr – ABC

Mar/Apr 2020

Assistant Publisher/Website Manager: Allison Percival Art Director: Amanda Sharp

Front & Centre

Calgary Cares

Copy Editor: Melissa Thomson

Helping kids learn to make good decisions . . . . . . . . . . 5

Calgary Cares is a free forum designed to match those with needs to those willing to help.

Distribution Manager: Cathy Bontje

Spring Flings

The Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre Healing Looks Different for Everyone . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Spring family fun in Canmore . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7

Infertility Takes Hope Away, Generations of Hope Gives It Back . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

Explore Glenbow Museum this spring break . . . . . . . . . 8

Client & Project Manager: Laura Dupont. . . . . . . .403-969-5901 advertising@calgaryschild.com Sales Director: Eilidh Tait . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 587-888-9556 eilidh.calgaryschild@gmail.com

Help is just a phone call away! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

+15 art circuit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Let’s go tubing! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12

Parent Connection

Calendar of Events . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14

How to build your village . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37

On Our Cover: Khorzhevska © Adobe Stock Images

How to make a ﬁve senses stress-busting kit for your kids . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38

2020 Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide Congratulations, you’re pregnant! Now what? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 Be well postpartum. Seven tips for healthy recovery . . 17 Diaper bags 101 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 19

All the feels . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39 6 Things your teen needs but doesn’t know how to ask for . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40

Education Boost your child’s language skills . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41 How ‘snowplow’ parenting hurts success . . . . . . . . . . 42

The 2020 Calgary’s Child Magazine Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide Whether it's your ﬁrst or a new addition, we have everything you need - from bump, baby to toddler and your growing family. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20

Early-Bird Camp & Program Feature

3 Tips to get kids to stop waking the whole family . . . 24

Considering your camp budget . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 43

Planning ahead - Your go-to guide to packing for the birth centre. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25

Summer camp planning . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44

Ask Elizabeth: The importance of daily naps . . . . . . . 26

Choosing the right day camp for your child . . . . . . . . 46

Get Rover ready! How to prepare your dog for bringing home baby . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29

Learning at summer camp . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48

Injuries to children’s teeth. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 The diet dilemma . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31 Parenting children diagnosed with ADHD . . . . . . . . . . 32 Ask Elizabeth: What to do about ﬁrst-born jealousy . . 33 Let it go - Seven things about parenting to stop worrying about. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34

Sports beneﬁt kids . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 45

Embrace outdoor play . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 Have a STEAM-powered summer . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 How to get your preschooler excited for day camp . . . 54 Boost your teen’s self-esteem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58 Seven ways overnight camp is great for kids . . . . . . . . 59

Contests - Enter to Win. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

Special camps for special needs . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64

CPS: Fraud awareness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35

10 Steps to squash sibling rivalry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66

Next Issue Spring Edition 2020 Theme: Get out and Play! Plus Summer Camps & More Ad Booking Deadline: March 31, 2020 Distribution: April 28, 2020 This is one of our most popular issues every year and features our huge Summer Camp & Program Guide, our Tween & Teen Guide, a Birthday & Celebration Guide, our Spring Education Guide features Academic Alternatives, and our second Spring Fun feature will help parents enjoy the warmth and plan for summer!

YYCFamilies Guide Now Booking From Santa visits and holiday photo tips in the winter section to the best splash parks, festivals and family hikes in the summer section, our new #YYCFamilies Guide is the go-to resource for every family at every age and stage, whether you’ve lived in Calgary for 24 years or 24 hours. Watch for it coming late Spring.

Find us on

Marina Agafonov Nanica Brown Chief Constable of the Calgary Police Service Mark Neufeld Hillary Dinning, ND Stacie Gaetz Gayla Grace Tanni Haas, Ph.D. Rebecca Hastings Healthy Parents, Healthy Children Christa Melnyk Hines Malia Jacobson Tanya Koob Sharon Loose

Jonathan Love Sarah Lyons Cheryl Maguire Shari Medini Pam Moore Jill Morgenstern Ourkids.net Elizabeth Pantley Allison Percival Jan Pierce, M.Ed. Sandi Schwartz Rachel Stacey Karen Ung Dr. Rory Vinsky

CBE, CSSD, Rocky View Schools & Foothills School Division Parents! Look for our link on your School’s Website and/or Monthly Newsletters: Connect digitally with Calgary’s Child Magazine for parenting and education support, local resources, programs and activities for kids and families. calgaryschild.com (click on current cover)

Things to know when booking sleepaway camp . . . . . 56

Summer camp 101 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62

4•

Contributors

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DECISION REFLECTIONS • • • • •

Creating a supportive framework. By Christa Melnyk Hines

ver looked at your child in bewilderment and asked them: “What were you thinking?!” Then you know that kids, especially teens, can make some profoundly poor decisions. Luckily, you can help them learn smart decision-making skills and manage mistakes without ‘helicoptering’ their every move. Blame biology. “Understand that your kids aren’t just being stupid and emotional about things. The adolescent brain is very uneven. Some parts of the brain are very adult in their structure and function, while other parts are very immature,” says pediatric psychologist Stephen Lassen, Ph.D. The prefrontal cortex of the brain, which handles decision-making, isn’t fully developed until around age 25. Given the number of decisions kids must make as they move into early adulthood - post-secondary education, career, relationships - this “makes for a challenging environment for parents,” says Lassen. While you can’t manipulate biology, you can take the steps to nurture thoughtful, independent decision-making. Give your child choices from an early age. Prime the decision-making pump beginning in toddlerhood. Offer your child simple choices you can live with, like: “Would you like to wear the red shirt or the yellow shirt today?” “Would you like to take a bath before or after dinner?” “Giving options like that not only helps them start to think through decisions, make decisions, and accept the consequences of those decisions, but it also sends the message that kids can do it, which tends to build selfconfidence,” says Lassen. Offer age-appropriate decisions. You know best what decisions your child is ready for based on past history, development, and personality. But, in general, experts say that teens are ready to choose their own friends, their after-school activities, clothing and hairstyles, and the type of summer job they’d like to get. “Those are totally appropriate decisions for teens to make that don’t have an impact on their safety or potential for significant long-term consequences,” says pediatric psychologist Christina Low Kapalu, Ph.D. “When decisions do involve their safety or potential for significant long-term consequences, that’s when we want to involve parents’ input.” Low Kapalu also recommends involving your teen in their health care decision-making. They should be part of the conversation with their health care providers, like participating with you in scheduling their appointments and asking questions about treatment options and side effects. “If they can’t do that by the time they’re 18, they’re going to really struggle to access medical care,” says Low Kapalu. Create a supportive framework. Think of how scaffolding supports buildings that are under construction. As the building becomes more secure and able to stand on its own, we remove pieces of the scaffolding. In the same vein, “scaffolding is gradually removed as kids demonstrate mastery of different skills and the decision-making process,” says Lassen. “We’re not directly making all of the decisions for them, but the scaffolding - the structure - is around them to help them grow into this skill of making decisions in a safe, monitored way.” Establish ground rules. With each new freedom, clearly explain your expectations with the understanding that privileges can be pulled back again. “It’s a process. The research really shows that the authoritative parenting style, which is just setting limits and enforcing clear limits with lots of warmth and engagement, serves us well in the teenage years,” says therapist Julie Gettings, MSW-LSCSW. “If they make a poor decision or if we’ve given them too much freedom, then sometimes we have to pull the rope back a little bit.”

Offer permission with parameters. “Kids will come to us with a request and we immediately want to say, ‘No, you can’t do that.’ But take a step back, pause and think about ‘what can I be okay with within that request?’” advises Gettings. For example, maybe your 14-year-old wants to go to the mall with friends. Instead of dismissing the idea, determine who they plan to go with and which adults will handle pick-up and drop-off. Set expectations like: “I expect you to answer your phone when I call you while you’re there,” or “I expect you to check in with me periodically while you are there.” And reinforce the positive by consistently praising the wise choices your child makes. Build conﬁdence. For kids who experience anxiety around decision-making, give them multiple opportunities to make small decisions and praise them for making a choice, even if you aren’t a fan of the decision. Avoid causing them to second-guess by saying things like, “Are you sure you want to do that?” which can further breed uncertainty. “The more decisions you make, the more comfortable you are with things maybe not working out perfectly, maybe even failing,” says Lassen. “But life goes on and as kids repeat that, they come to see that making a bad decision is not the end of the world. And in fact, it can really teach us a lot.” Wait to be needed. Resist swooping in and rescuing your child from the consequences of their poor decisions. For example, if they forget their science homework, they’ll have to face the consequences.

What are/were my options? Pros/Cons? Do/did I need additional information? Which option did I choose? Why? Given another chance, would I choose differently?

*Remind your teen that drug/alcohol-use impairs good judgement.

“Rushing in too quickly sends the message to kids that they can’t do it, and it tends to push kids away from parents. It promotes dependence, which is the opposite of what we’re trying to do as parents,” says Lassen. “We want our kids to be happy and do well, but so much of being a healthy, well-functioning adult is learning from difﬁcult experiences where decisions didn’t go well.” Reﬂect on decisions. We all make decisions that we later regret. “Stress to your child that you love them, even if you don’t like their decision,” says Low Kapalu. Rather than harshly interrogating or criticizing your child, facilitate a thoughtful, logical discussion, which will help them feel safe coming to you when they make mistakes. “Unfortunately, we can’t always see our blind spots and teens are no different,” says Low Kapalu. “They may not be aware of their inability to see the long-term consequences or be able to identify all of the possible outcomes because they don’t have the life experience that their parents do.” Christa is a nationally-published writer. She has two adolescent sons whose decisions sometimes leave her scratching her head. CCM

REVEL IN. If you’re without employer benefits benefits, we have a plan that fits your needs and your budget—so you can spend time enjoying the little things. 1-800-AB-CROSS | ab.bluecross.ca ®

*The Blue Cross symbol and name are registered marks of the Canadian Association of Blue Cross Plans, an association of independent Blue Cross plans. Licensed to ABC Benefits Corporation for use in operating the Alberta Blue Cross Plan. †Blue Shield is a registered trade-mark of the Blue Cross Blue Shield Association. IP20-001 2020/02

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 5

front & centre

helping kids learn to make good decisions

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Start getting egg-cited. Spring has sprung, so come bounce around the zoo with special family-friendly activities and events that are bound to keep you hopping all weekend long! Visit calgaryzoo.com for details.

spring flings

spring family fun in Canmore Fun and fantastic views in our backyard! By Karen Ung pring in Canmore can mean mountain biking or Nordic skiing, depending on the day. But no matter what, you can expect fun and fantastic views! Here are some ideas for Spring family fun in Canmore - only one hour from Calgary! Bike the Legacy Trail to Banff. This scenic, paved bike path is suitable for towing a Chariot or riding with bigger kids as there aren’t many large hills. Start at Canmore’s Travel Alberta Visitor Information Centre (26.8 kilometres one way to Banff), Valleyview Picnic Area (12.4 kilometres one way), or Cascade Ponds (4.8 kilometres one way). After exploring Canmore’s sister city, enjoy a tailwind on the way back, or hop on ROAM Transit Route 3 at Banff High School Transit Hub. All buses have bike racks! The Legacy Trail is typically bikeable starting mid-April. To check the Banff Trail Report for current conditions, visit pc.gc.ca/en/pn-np/ab/banff/activ/cyclismerouteroadcycling/Heritage-Legacy. Canmore Museum and Geoscience Centre features Canmore’s history and geology in displays, videos, and hands-on exhibits. Kids can complete a fun scavenger hunt to earn a prize, dress up like miners, and more. Complete the experience with a short walk to the North Western Mounted Police Barracks (400 metres) or highlyInstagrammed Canmore Engine Bridge (850 metres). For more information, visit canmoremuseum.com. Policeman’s Creek Boardwalk is a beautiful nature escape. While you could do a 3.9-kilometre loop, my family likes starting near the Big Head Sculpture by The Grizzly Paw Pub (great lunch spot) and walking to Spring Creek Bridge. This 1.2-kilometre round trip walk follows the creek and offers fantastic views of the Three Sisters as you head east. Return the way you came. For more information, visit explorecanmore.ca/listings/policemanscreek-boardwalk. Canmore Nordic Centre is a year-round outdoor playground. Cross-country ski or fatbike until late April; then return for mountain biking, disc golf, roller skiing, and orienteering when the trails dry out. Rentals and lessons are available; book in advance on weekends. Note that trail fees are in effect for cross-country and skate skiing from 9am until 5pm. For more information, visit albertaparks.ca/ parks/kananaskis/canmore-nordic-centre-pp. Elevation Place is a state-of-the-art indoor playground where you can swim, climb, and work out. This gorgeous facility boasts a large aquatic centre, gym, and climbing centre with routes for all skill levels. If you’re new to climbing, sign up for a climbing lesson! For more information, visit canmore.ca/recreationfacility/elevation-place. Grassi Lakes. Hike to a waterfall, emerald-green ponds, and pictographs on this popular short trail. The

“Easy” Trail is an old road that is sports-stroller friendly, while the “More Difficult” Trail has stairs and passes a pretty waterfall. Note that the “More Difficult” Trail is subject to ice flows and closures during winter conditions. Distance: 3.8-kilometre round trip, Elevation gain: 125 metres. For more information, read playoutsideguide. com/2019/11/hiking-grassi-lakes-trail-canmore. Quarry Lake Park. Puppy can play at Quarry Lake Park! In addition to 5 kilometres of walking trails, there is a large off-leash area. When it warms up, enjoy the sandy beach, stand-up paddle boarding, or a lakeside picnic. For more information, visit quarrylakecanmore.ca. Heart Creek Bunker is a unique hike near Canmore that takes you to two large caverns in the side of Mount McGillivray. Originally built to house sensitive documents during the Cold War, the project was later abandoned due to moisture and funding. Bring bright headlamps and only go when the slope leading to the bunker is snow-free (the opening is on an avalanche slide path). Distance: 3.8 kilometres round trip, Elevation gain: 94 metres. For more information, read playoutsideguide. com/2016/11/bow-valley-bunker. Canmore Mountain Market is the place for produce, baked goods, and local arts and crafts. Catch it every Thursday from May 21 to October 1, 2020, 10am to 6pm in downtown Canmore (902, 7 Avenue). For more information, visit canmore.ca/residents/ mountain-market.

Photos: Courtesy of Karen Ung

Heart Creek Elevation Place

Know before you go Spring is avalanche season! Check trail and avalanche reports before you head out. Weather and road conditions change rapidly in the mountains. Be prepared with warm layers, extra mittens and socks (especially for younger kids), water, snacks, ﬁrst-aid kit, headlamps, and a map. Keep a shovel, battery booster, and windshield wiper ﬂuid in your car. I hope you have a safe and fun trip to Canmore!

Karen is a Calgary-based blogger and travel writer who was born in the boonies and grew up granola. A mother and lover of maps, mountains, and mochas, Karen is always planning her next road trip (if she isn’t currently on one). Follow her adventures at playoutsideguide.com. CCM

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 7

spring flings

explore glenbow museum this spring break Art, nature, and history for all ages.

or many, Spring Break means more time with the family, which makes Glenbow an ideal destination. With over 90,000 square feet chock full of art and history, you and your crew will never get bored. If anything, you might be left wondering where to start. Here are a few suggestions to get you well on your way to a wonderful day of adventure: Art activities! Snap a self-portrait or a candid photo, print, and decorate it! Have fun with oil pastels and make a smudgy work of art, spin in the Discovery Room chairs, and gently bounce on the couches. Complete the Maverick’s Exploration Guide. This is an awesome way to work together and look deeply at the displays and the stories in each Mavericks exhibition. Pick up the guide in the Discovery Room. (Bonus: Find the ‘ghosts’ of Tom Three Persons, William Van Horn, David Thompson, and Saukamappee.) Take in the wall of portraits in the Newcomers gallery in Mavericks. Which is your favorite? Can you

ﬁnd the one with a dog on the running board of a car? How did they get him to do that? Visit the touchable quartz in the Minerals gallery. Engage your sense of touch and use three words to describe what it feels like. (There’s also a Minerals Exploration Guide you can pick up in the Discovery Room.) Can you ﬁnd the secret train in the painting The Three Sisters by John Hammond? See if you can when you visit Picturing the Northwest: Historical Art from Glenbow’s Collection. Discover the secret drawers of war medals in the Warriors exhibition. Not everyone notices these are here - they’re fun to pull out and look inside! Find Sokari Douglas Camp’s sculpture in Where Symbols Meet: A Celebration of West African Achievement. It’s full of unexpected colors and lines - just when you think one is going to keep going, it abruptly ends or changes!

The Rise & Fall of Civilization

Awaits! e r u t n e v d A y Famil A Highﬂying

MARCH 18-21 TICKETS AT ALBERTABALLET.COM 8•

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Photo: Courtesy of Elyse Bouvier

By Rachel Stacey

Mineralogy Visit the giant buffalo in the Blackfoot Gallery, check out the miniature model of the buffalo jump, and imagine what a thunderous sight that would be! Bonus: Check out the Picasso-inspired cubist buffalo sculptures in Kent Monkmanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The Rise and Fall of Civilization on the second ďŹ&#x201A;oor to compare and contrast. Feel the beaver hides in the Maverickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fur Trade Gallery. Sit down on a bundle next to the canoe and listen to the ďŹ&#x201A;ow of the water. Maybe visit the washroom after! Listen for the musical score and take a moment to enjoy the light show of the Aurora Borealis! Compare views from all three ďŹ&#x201A;oors - the sculpture comes to life every 30 minutes. Look deeply at Canoes in a Fog, Lake Superior by Francis Ann Hopkins in Picturing the Northwest:

Photo: Courtesy of Mike Tan

â&#x20AC;&#x153;With over 90,000 square feet chock full of art and history, you and your crew will never get bored.â&#x20AC;?

Historical Art from Glenbowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Collection. Imagine what it would smell like out on the cold lake. Visit On Location: Artists Explore a Sense of Place and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ďŹ nd yourselfâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in Ron Moppettâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Swarm (the mixed media painting includes a mirror - get it?). Vivian Maierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s photos are like secrets captured on ďŹ lm. Some of them are funny, some of them are sad, a lot of them are mysterious. Find a photo in the exhibition Vivian Maier: In Her Own Hands that reminds you of a feeling youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had and make up a story about whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s happening to the person in the photo. At Glenbow, they believe art is for everyone. As Calgaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s art museum, their purpose is to provide vibrant experiences that bring art and culture to life. For more information, visit glenbow.org. CCM

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spring flings

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spring flings

lthough Spring is in the air, Calgarians are well aware that doesn’t mean the days of frigid temperatures are over. In fact, the average temperature in March in Calgary is 4°C. So, what do you do when you want to get the kids out of the house to explore something new but can’t depend on unpredictable Alberta weather? Create your own indoor art tour through downtown’s Plus 15 network! The Plus 15 Art Circuit, presented by The City of Calgary Public Art Program, introduces you to 14 interesting pieces from the Civic Art Collection. Easily accessible through the Plus 15 system, this free, selfguided tour is primarily indoors with just a few quick trips outside. The City of Calgary’s website makes it easy to ﬁnd your way to all 14 artworks with a detailed PDF that includes a map and descriptions of each piece. Your kids will get a chance to check out interesting artworks including bears, a family of horses, a beaver, mermaids, gargoyles, and even a Space Flower!

Family of Horses

+15 art circuit An indoor art adventure in Calgary’s skyway. By Stacie Gaetz

Municipal Plaza My daughter, five, and son, two, and I chose our starting point as the main floor of City Hall at the south entrance near a parking pay station. This allowed us to pop outside right away for a quick visit to Family of Horses (1989) by Harry O’Hanlon on the front steps of the Municipal Building. These horses were presented to The City of Calgary by Spruce Meadows on behalf of the horse industry of Alberta. The stallion overlooking the mare and foal signifies the bond and strength among families. It wasn’t hard to tell this was my daughter’s favorite exhibit as she is deeply into all things horses right now. We also walked up the stairs to say hello to one of the original lions from Centre Street Bridge. The concrete lion was one of four big cats sculpted by stonemason James L. Thomson in 1916-17. When the bridge was renovated in 1999, the lions were removed, restored, and one was placed in front of the Calgary Municipal Building. This big guy was my two-year-old son’s favorite piece by far.

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Photos: Courtesy of Stacie Gaetz

of sculptures including Citizen of the Century (1975) by Hazel O’Brien, a time capsule commemorating Colonel James Walker (1848-1936). We also visited Little Mermaid (1913), another favorite of my daughter’s. This little sister of the famous bronze mermaid from Copenhagen is one of three half-size versions, inspired by a graceful ballet dancer in the role of the fairy tale mermaid and commissioned by brewer and arts patron Carl Jacobsen of the New Carlsberg Brewery.

Through the glass One of the best parts about the tour was the fact that it wasn’t in an art gallery where the kids had to behave themselves and be quiet. They were able to run through the corridors and get up close to the art pieces. They could even walk around the sculptures to see them from all sides. This sparked more interest and allowed it to be an educational experience (without feeling like one) by inspiring questions like, “Why is one horse so far away from the other two?” and “What are those women (Women are Persons!) talking about?” Women are Persons! (1999), a statue of the Famous 5, is one of the pieces we were able to see through the windows of the Plus 15, an added benefit if you happen to do the tour on a chilly day. Natural Engineer (1987), a bronze beaver by artist Don Begg, was another piece that we were able to view from the windows. The Family of Man a.k.a. Brotherhood of Mankind (1967), the now-famous stretched and naked aluminum figures and Calgary Board of Education logo, can also be seen through the glass off of First Street and Sixth Avenue SE. City Hall On the way back to City Hall, the tour includes Ex/ Diamond (1993) by Vera Gartley, who chose to transform this dark corner with light, reflections, and shapes. City Hall and the Municipal Building are home to four other art pieces including: • Fragment (1987) by Bill Morton • Joy (1987) by Roy Leadbeater • The Bears (1983) by Suzanne Sablé • So the Bishop Said to the Actress… (1981) by J. Seward Johnson Jr. For a detailed PDF including descriptions of the art works and a map, visit calgary.ca and search for ‘art circuit tour.’ For an expanded experience, be sure to also download the audio files or sign up for one of the guided tours at calgary.ca/recreation/registration.

Eye Wonders murals by Angie Rees

Stacie is a freelance writer and editor and mother of a delightful daughter, ﬁve, and silly son, two. CCM

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Arts Commons From there, we went back into the Plus 15 and walked through Arts Commons, which included the bonus of a number of temporary exhibits that weren’t in the formal PDF tour guide, including work from local Indigenous people and hanging masks made by a Calgary Grade 9 class, as well as a soundscape featuring a variety of noises played over speakers in the roof. As we made our way into the Glenbow Museum and the TELUS Convention Centre, we stopped by a number

spring flings

let’s go tubing! Spring fun at tube parks in Calgary, Kananaskis, and Banff. By Tanya Koob

ubing is a great Spring activity when there is often insufﬁcient snow in the city for regular sledding. There are four different tube parks to visit between Calgary and Lake Louise, all located at family-friendly ski resorts. Each one is fun in a unique way with slight differences or advantages, depending on your family’s desired thrill factor! What to expect at a tube park Tubing is a fun, safe activity for the whole family and is relatively gentle on the body. Unlike regular sledding, you won’t have to worry about hitting a tree or launching over a bump and injuring yourself. Resorts test their parks regularly to make sure the tubing lanes are safe and that you won’t slide beyond safety measures put in place at the bottom of each lane. The walls between each lane are also high enough to ensure you have a smooth ride down without crashing into anyone. Another great thing about tubing is you don’t have to climb back up at the end of each ride. There’s always a conveyor belt lift called a Magic Carpet to get you (and your tube) to the top of the hill. Required clothing for tubing Wear warm winter clothing: ski pants and a warm coat, winter boots, waterproof mittens or gloves, and a hat or toque. You’ll also want something to cover your face if it’s cold and ski goggles are often recommended, if you have them. A helmet is required for children at all resorts and is recommended for adults, as well. It’s best to bring ski helmets with you or you can usually rent them at the resort, if you don’t have your own. Basic rules and guidelines 1. Ski boots are not permitted in tube parks, so make sure you bring normal winter boots, if you are planning a combo ski/tubing day. 2. All participants have to ride in their own tube (including young children). You can usually slide down together with friends or family members by holding on to each other’s tube.

WinSport 3. Children under 12 must be under the supervision of a parent or legal guardian at all times. 4. Tubing is not recommended for pregnant women or for people with neck or back conditions. Other red ﬂags could include a recent surgery, high blood pressure, or problems with vertigo/dizziness. Overall, if you are healthy and can handle light jarring to your body, tubing is a lot of fun for the whole family. 5. Every tube park has individual height and age restrictions so check this information before visiting a resort. Q Four tube parks located within easy driving distance from Calgary 1. WinSport Tube Park at Canada Olympic Park, Calgary. Height and age requirements - The minimum height requirement is 36 inches tall. Children between 36 and 42 inches may slide with an accompanying adult holding on to the child’s tube during descent. Children over 42 inches tall may slide on their own. Hours of operation - The tube park is open on Fridays from 4 to 7:30pm and on Saturdays and Sundays from 10am to 5pm. The tube park is scheduled to stay open until the end of March 2020. Cost - Tube park tickets are offered in three-hour blocks and can be purchased as single tickets, family tickets, or group bookings (40+ people and pre-booked). A single ticket ranges in price from $17.99 (Friday nights) to $19.99 (weekends). Family packages are $85.98 (for two adults and two children). Note: Pricing is more expensive during holiday times for all tickets, which includes the period from March 19 to 29, 2020.

What makes this tube park unique from the others? The WinSport Tube Park is one of the fastest of its kind in Western Canada! It’s also one of the largest with over 10 sliding lanes. The park also has washrooms and a food truck on-site, so you don’t have to go all the way back down to the day lodge for a hot chocolate or snack. 2. Wanidu Tube Park at Nakiska Ski Area, Kananaskis. Height and age requirements - Children must be 42 inches tall or at least three years old with an adult (riding in their own tube). Hours of operation - The tube park is open on weekends from 10:30am to 4pm. Nakiska is scheduled to stay open until April 19, 2020, but tube park hours could be affected in April, if there is insufficient snow at the base. Cost - $29.95 for adults, $25.95 for youth (13 to 17) and seniors, $22.95 for children (five to 12), and free for children under five with a paying adult. Tube park passes are valid for a two-hour period from your first scan. There are also group prices (minimum of 15 people). What makes this tube park unique from the others? If you have already purchased a ski lift ticket or you have a season’s pass, you can purchase a tube park ticket for an additional $15 for adults, seniors, and youth or an additional $5 for children. This is an excellent tube park for young children and ‘tube park newbies.’ There are only three lanes (and they aren’t very long), so it’s a good beginner experience. (I’d bring my three-year-old child here before taking them to a larger park, like WinSport.) I also like that the tube park is located right beside the beginner ski area and it’s free to ski (with a special beginner pass from the day lodge). Tubing would make for a great add-on with young children who tire of skiing

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tried some of the more 'mellow' ones such as Lake Louise or Nakiska. Head to Mt Norquay when you're ready for some serious speed and a decent thrill! Other activities to enjoy in the Banff area - You’ll be conveniently located near the town of Banff if you want to add on a visit to the hot springs, a ride up the Banff Gondola, or a walk on one of the town trails. The gondola is also free to ride down if you hike up in the Spring months.

3. Mt Norquay Tube Park, Banff. Height and age requirements - Children must be 42 inches tall and four+ years old to use the tube park, which is a higher age and height requirement than the other three resorts. Hours of operation - The tube park is open seven days a week from 10am to 4pm. It is also open Friday and Saturday nights from 5 to 9pm. The resort is open through Easter, but you’ll want to verify the park is still open in April before making the drive out. Cost - $37 for adults, $32 for youth (13 to 17) and seniors, and $26 for children (four to 12). Children under four can’t use the tube park. Tube park passes are valid for the day. You can also purchase a family pass for $112 (for two adults and two children) with additional children added on for $25. $28 for additional youth. There is also a $10 discount if you visit the park for the last hour of opening. What makes this tube park unique from the others? Visitors can add a sightseeing ride on the North American Chair on to their tubing pass for a small additional cost. At the top, you’ll ﬁnd the Cliffhouse Bistro (additional charges apply if ordering food or drinks). Tubing + Sightseeing packages are $59 per adult, $49 for youth and seniors, and $39 for children. A family combo package is $176. The park also has a small sliding area and a kids’ play area for younger family members who can’t participate in tubing. This tube park has the longest sliding lanes in Alberta and is a great 'intermediate/advanced' park after you've

4. Sunny Tube Park, Lake Louise Ski Resort, Banff. Height and age requirements - Children must be at least three years old to ride in the tube park.

Photos: Courtesy of Tanya Koob

“Tubing is a fun, safe activity for the whole family and is relatively gentle on the body.”

Mt Norquay

Hours of operation - This park is open daily from 10am to 4pm until May 3, 2020 (when there definitely won’t be snow for sliding anywhere else). Cost - $31 for adults, $26 for youth (13 to 17) and seniors, $20 for children (six to 12), and free for children ages three to five. Tube park passes are valid for the day. A family pass for up to four people is $87 ($15 add-on price for additional children). What makes this tube park unique from the others? This is definitely a tube park for skiers and snowboarders looking to add a little bit of extra fun to their resort day. Purchase a lift ticket for the day and you can add tubing on for an additional $10 ($5 for children). Season pass holders get free tubing and Lake Louise Plus Card holders pay only $5 for a tubing day pass. There are other discounts available for Costco tickets and SkiBig3 passes. This is not really a ‘stand-alone’ park where you’d drive to Lake Louise just for the small tube park. It is, however, an excellent park for young children and for families already in the Lake Louise area. There are only two lanes (and they aren’t very long), so it’s a good beginner experience. Other activities to enjoy in the Lake Louise area I highly recommend a guided snowshoe tour while at the resort, if you are not a skier. You can also purchase a sightseeing gondola/tubing combo package, if you want to get up the mountain for some awesome views but don’t want to go skiing or snowshoeing. Over at the lake, you can enjoy skating on the rink in front of the Château and if you bring sleds, there’s a fun sliding hill beside the hotel, as well. Day trips to Lake Louise are a lot of fun over Spring Break when there’s often not much snow remaining in Calgary.

Happy sliding and playing! Tanya is a freelance writer and mom to a spunky boy. She loves hiking, camping, skiing, and all things mountain-related. She is the author of the blog, Family Adventures in the Canadian Rockies, rockiesfamilyadventures.com. CCM

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after an hour or two (and could be a good treat or reward for good effort on the bunny hill). Other activities to enjoy in the area (aside from the obvious downhill skiing) - There is a normal sledding hill and a small skating pond at Kananaskis Village (assuming it stays cold enough for snow and ice to be in good condition). My family also enjoys walking around the resort on the Village Rim Pathway or going inside the Pomeroy Lodge for drinks and snacks at the café.

spring flings

calgary's child calendar For the most up-to-date calendar of events check out our website at calgaryschild.com. ONGOING EVENTS Did you know there are 13 Early Learning Centres at Calgary Public libraries across the city, including the newest Co-op Community Early Learning Centre at Nose Hill Library, and the freshly-renovated Centre at Fish Creek and Village Square libraries! These interactive spaces allow kids newborn to age 5 to be creative through active play and learning. calgarylibrary.ca New! Sundays, Noon to 3pm; Family Sundays at Devonian Gardens. Check out The City’s family-friendly room while visiting the garden! All activities are self-led, so families can do them together, adding some fun to your time at the park. There will also be books to read, puzzles, coloring, and games. Sundays, 8am to Noon; Family Swim at Southland Leisure Centre. Enjoy the water park! Adults must be accompanied by a child, and all children must be accompanied by an adult. Starting March 2, Mondays & Wednesdays, 9am to Noon and 1 to 4pm & Fridays, 9am to Noon; Family Drop-In at Bricks 4 Kidz. Visit for some family play! Staff will be on-hand for questions but not to supervise. Children must be accompanied by a parent. 731, 13 Avenue NE. bricks4kidz.com/calgary New! Tuesdays, 10am to Noon; Toddler Tables at Devonian Gardens Playground. Want your toddlers to learn more about the natural world in a fun and educational way? The City will be setting up Toddler Tables with information geared toward kids ages 1 to 5 plus an adult. Tuesdays, 4 to 10pm; Terriﬁc Tuesdays at Southland Leisure Centre. Join for 50 percent off regular admission (water park access begins at 7pm). Wednesdays, 10:30am; Story Time in Gasoline Alley Museum. Bring the little ones down to hear classic stories from the past: Snow White, Winnie the Pooh, Curious George, and Peter Rabbit! Other activities include train play table, crafts, tricycle track, and classic games area. heritagepark.ca Wednesdays, 4 to 10pm; Wild Wednesdays at Village Square Leisure Centre. Join for 50 percent off regular admission. For all ages. Thursdays, 7 to 9pm; Toys in the Waterpark at Southland Leisure Centre. Try out the giant inﬂatable obstacle course or the ‘walk on water’ balls. Anyone 8 and up can try them out! Saturdays, 6 to 8pm; Super Soaker Saturdays at Trico Centre for Family Wellness. Bring your own Super Soaker and join in the pool for Super Soaker Wars! Backpack-style super soakers not permitted. For ages 2 to 17. Kids age 7 and under must be accompanied by an adult. tricocentre.ca Saturdays, 7 to 10pm; Join for 50 Percent Off Regular Admission at Village Square Leisure Centre.

Saturdays, 6:30 to 7:15pm & 7:30 to 8:15pm; Nerf Wars at Trico Centre for Family Wellness. Join for drop-in Nerf Wars fun! Nerf guns and eye protection available or bring your own N’strike compatible Nerf gun. Darts provided. For ages 2 to 17. Kids age 7 and under must be accompanied by an adult. tricocentre.ca $1 Splash Swim for Kids at The City Leisure Centres. Check your favorite pool schedule. $2 per adult; $1 per child/senior. calgary.ca/recdropin

PRESCHOOLER FUN Mondays (excluding long weekends); Drop-In Gymnastics at Trico Centre for Family Wellness. Play in the gymnasium with gymnastics equipment. This is a parented activity while the facilitator is there to encourage play and ensure safety. For ages walking to 6 years. Free with Family/Child Membership. tricocentre.ca Tuesdays & Fridays, 9:30 to 11am; Drop-In Playtime at Trico Centre for Family Wellness. Play in the gymnasium with a variety of active equipment! This is a parented activity. Free with Family/Child Membership. For ages walking to 6 years. tricocentre.ca Drop-In Playschool Programs at Southland and Village Square Leisure Centres. There are flexible options for preschoolers. April 20, 10:30 to 11:15am (Saddletowne Library); Mad Science® Keep In Touch Preschool Workshop. Children will learn how sensitive their fingertips are by experiencing how difficult it is to identify objects when different senses are dulled. Children will also make Mad Science® Silly Putty and feel what it’s like to mold different shapes in their hands. Brought to you by The Calgary Public Library, presented by Mad Science®. Spaces are limited. To register: calgarylibrary.ca

YOUTH ACTIVITIES Fridays, 6:30 to 8:30pm; Kids Night Out at Trico Centre for Family Wellness. Drop the kids off for a workshop, including tie dye, canvas painting, jewelry-making, and more! Pre-registration required online: tricocentre.ca April 17, 7 to 10pm; Youth Event at Village Square Leisure Centre. Play, swim, jump, splash, and slide into the weekend! Bring your friends to the water park for tons of fun, including games, music, and prizes! Enjoy the wave pool, slides, and hot tub, too. Calgary Flames Grade 6 YMCA Program. Every Grade 6 student in Calgary receives a free YMCA Membership & Active Programming! Keep active, participate in tournaments and events, and practice independence in a safe place that promotes the Y’s values of honesty, caring, respect, and responsibility. Memberships valid until August 31, 2020. To sign up: ymcacalgary.org/grade6

MARCH Legendary Easter Hunt Tickets at Butterfield Acres Farm on Sale Now! Your family will start off in the Birthday Barn listening to the Legend of the Easter Bunny! Once you know what the Easter Bunny needs each of your kids to do, then it’s off with your baskets to see what you can find! When the kids collect what the Easter Bunny needs in their baskets (provided), they’ll head over to his warren, and send the goods down the tunnels to the Easter Bunny’s secret workshop where magically everything turns into Easter eggs for all the children in the world! Specially designed for kids 7 and under. Takes place April 4, 5, 10 & 11. Must pre-purchase tickets through the website: butterfieldacres.com Throughout March; The City’s Fun Winter Activities. Looking for something to do with family or friends or looking for a fun new activity for your child? Check out the events and activities happening in a community near you! calgary.ca/free March 7, 2 to 4pm; Calgary Girls Choir Presents, Catch the Spirit. Enjoy a Spring concert featuring the youngest singers: Dolce and Viva with a special guest appearance from the senior choir, Brava! Tickets are free for kids under 13 and there will be an ice cream party with games and a draw after the concert! To purchase tickets: brownpapertickets.com March 7, 14 & 21, 3:30 to 4:30pm; Sharing Dance at Wildflower Arts Centre. Be part of a nation-wide celebration of dance! Learn the 2020 Sharing Dance routine with a professional dancer. National Ballet School of Canada is partnering with artists to engage all Canadians in this shared expression of joy. 403-2493773; sharingdance.ca March 8, 2 to 3pm (Signal Hill Library); Mad Science® Kitchen Chemistry Workshop. Learn the difference between chemical and physical reactions, about acids, bases, and neutral liquids. Learn about indicators, how they can be used to detect different substances, and how our bodies change starches to sugar. Brought to you by The Calgary Public Library, presented by Mad Science®. Spaces are limited. To register: calgarylibrary.ca March 8, Instrument Discovery Zoo: 2pm, Concert: 3pm; Calgary Philharmonic Orchestra Presents, Symphony Sundays for Kids, Presto Mambo. A concert about the music of the Americas takes an unexpected turn when Max, an energetic but impulsive young boy, makes his way onto the stage to help the Orchestra. Soon, Max is on a whirlwind adventure that takes him from the concert hall to the vibrant lands of Latin America. With the help of his friend Mambo the dog, the Orchestra, and the audience, Max learns the magic of Latin rhythms. To purchase tickets: calgaryphil.com March 8 to 10; Shen Yun is Coming to Calgary! Shen Yun offers a rich cultural experience featuring

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March 13, 6 to 8pm; Dive-In Movie at Village Square Leisure Centre - Frozen 2. Settle in for a night at the movies in the water park! Rent tubes, bring your own flotation devices, lounge poolside, or watch from the water. Enjoy a great film and even better time with friends, family, and neighbors. Upcoming movie titles: facebook.com/villagesquareleisurecentre March 14, 6:30 to 8:30pm; Dive-In Movie at Southland Leisure Centre. Settle in for a night at the movies in the water park! Lounge poolside or watch from the water. Enjoy a great film and an even better time with friends, family, and neighbors. For upcoming movie titles: facebook.com/southlandleisurecentre March 14, 1 to 3pm; Family Museum Adventure: Explore the Art of Maxwell Bates. Grab your crew and join Glenbow Museum for an adventure fit for the whole family! Free with Admission/Membership. glenbow.org/programs March 14, 7:30pm; Cantaré Children’s Choir Presents, The Lonesome Road. Reaching into the skies or into the hearts of others, the choir will examine the human desire to always push on for a better world. This concert will also feature the beloved “Man Enough to Sing” ensemble. To purchase tickets: brownpapertickets.com March 18 to 21; Alberta Ballet Presents, Peter Pan. A highflying family adventure awaits! Peter Pan is a boy who won’t grow up. Since its inception in 1902, Peter Pan has been adapted in many different ways for the stage and screen, but the heart of the story has never changed! To purchase tickets: albertaballet.com March 20 to 29, 10am to 4pm; Spring Rally in the Alley. Spring is in the air and fun is on-hand at Gasoline Alley Museum! Enjoy automobile and sports-themed indoor games, crafts, and activities throughout the museum. heritagepark.ca March 22 & 28; Studio Bell, home of the National Music Centre - Calling all Mini-Maestros! Explore the science of electronic instruments by creating sounds with magnets and metal. studiobell.ca March 28 & 29; The Calgary Baby & Tot Show - for Bump, Baby & Beyond! A premier parenting event designed to put everything you need under one roof. Featuring local and national exhibitors showcasing the latest in apparel, services, products, and toys to assist parents and caregivers every step of the way. Join industry experts in the seminar theatre with educational presentations discussing everything from pregnancy to preschool! There will be interactive play areas, arts & crafts, and ongoing entertainment for the whole family! To purchase tickets: calgarybabyshow.com

April 4, 5, 10 & 11; Legendary Easter Hunt Tickets at Butterfield Acres Farm on Sale Now! Your family will start off in the Birthday Barn listening to the Legend of the Easter Bunny! Once you know what the Easter Bunny needs each of your kids to do, then it’s off with your baskets to see what you can find! When the kids collect what the Easter Bunny needs in their baskets (provided), they’ll head over to his warren, and send the goods down the tunnels to the Easter Bunny’s secret workshop where magically everything turns into Easter eggs for all the children in the world! Specially designed for kids 7 and under. Must pre-purchase tickets through the website: butterfieldacres.com April 10 to May 2, check website for show times; StoryBook Theatre Presents, A Year with Frog & Toad. Waking from hibernation, Frog and Toad plant gardens, swim, rake leaves, go sledding, and learn life lessons. These two best friends celebrate and rejoice in the differences that make them unique and special. Part vaudeville, part make believe - all charm, A Year with Frog and Toad tells the story of a friendship that endures throughout the seasons. Rated K. Recommended for ages 3 and up. To purchase tickets: storybooktheatre.org April 10 & 11; Easter Eggstravaganza at the Calgary Zoo! Hop on down to the Zoo for two days, where kids of all ages can explore, create, and learn! The annual Easter Eggstravaganza is back with family-friendly fun designed to help your family say good-bye to winter and hello to warmer weather! Included with Admission. calgaryzoo.com April 11; Studio Bell, home of the National Music Centre - Calling all Mini-Maestros! Join musician educators for an Instrument Petting Zoo! studiobell.ca Saturdays, 1pm & Sundays, 1 & 2pm, April 11 to May 3; The Loose Moose Theatre For Kids Presents, The Return of Sherlock Jr. Loose Moose is located on the second floor, Crossroads Market: 1235, 26 Avenue SE. To purchase tickets: loosemoose.com April 15, 6:30pm; Family-Friendly Ghost Tour at Heritage Park. Visit for a guided ghost tour through the streets and alleyways of the Historical Village. Behind the Park’s old-fashioned charm lie stories of otherworldly encounters, spine-tingling history, and some memorable manifestations! heritagepark.ca

APRIL

April 18 & 19, 9am to 5pm; Supertrain 2020. Canada’s biggest and best annual model train show! Lionel, Lego, Thomas the Tank, children’s play area, and more! There will be over 65,000 square feet of operating model railroad layouts, displays, live demos for beginners, ride-on trains, and more. At least eight food trucks will be on-site. Bring a non-perishable food donation for the Calgary Food Bank and receive a dollar off admission. Free for children 15 and under. To purchase tickets: supertrain.ca

Throughout April; The City’s Fun Winter Activities. Looking for something to do with family or friends or looking for a fun new activity for your child? Check out the events and activities happening in a community near you! calgary.ca/free

April 18 & 25, 3:30 to 4:30pm; Sharing Dance at Wildﬂower Arts Centre. Be part of a nation-wide celebration of dance! Learn the 2020 Sharing Dance routine with a professional dancer. National Ballet School of Canada is partnering with artists to engage

all Canadians in this shared expression of joy. 403-2493773; sharingdance.ca April 22; Brawn Family Foundation Bugtopia Play Area Opening at the Calgary Zoo. Brawn Family Foundation Bugtopia welcomes you to the world of insects, right in your own backyard! It’s an area of learning and exploration. Who are these tiny critters in your back yard by that old tree stump? Find out as you explore three towers that help you learn about the importance of insects and bugs, what their roles are in nature, and why you should care about them! (Just one twist: this time, they are much larger than you!) Included with Admission. calgaryzoo.com April 23 to 26; Calgary Comic & Entertainment Expo. The Calgary Expo is a pop-culture convention held annually at Stampede Park. Shop hundreds of vendors and exhibitors, check out panels and workshops, meet your favorite stars and creators, and celebrate what makes you geeky with thousands of other fans in cosplay. Get ready for an epic 2020! To purchase tickets: calgaryexpo.com April 25, 1 to 3pm; The City’s Scavenger Hunt at South Glenmore Reservoir. Ready to explore Glenmore Reservoir through a fun and interactive event? Exercise your brain and body through a scavenger hunt that will provide excitement, education, and physical activity while experiencing the beauty of the reservoir. For all ages plus an adult.

COMING IN MAY May 2, 3 & May 9, 10; Day Out With Thomas™ at Heritage Park. Day Out With Thomas™ provides an opportunity for kids to take a ride with their favorite tank engine, meet the railway controller, Sir Topham Hatt, have fun in the Imagination Station, enjoy face painting, musical entertainment, and much more. Tickets on sale now: heritagepark.ca May 3; Join Hospice Calgary for the Annual Family-Friendly 5K Walk Through Sikome Lake at Fish Creek Provincial Park. Hospice Calgary will be walking to recognize and celebrate loved ones during National Palliative Care Week. Join the conversation: #Hike4HospiceYYC. To register or donate: hospicecalgary.ca/hike

SURROUNDING AREAS AIRDRIE April 18, 2pm; The Bert Church Live Theatre Presents, Dufﬂebag Theatre’s Beauty and the Beast. This story, loved by so many, is a tale as old as time! Though we know the story, we are left wondering whether the Beast will learn his lesson and redeem himself before it’s too late. DufﬂeBag’s adaptation of this timeless classic is guaranteed to ring a Belle! To purchase tickets: airdrie.ca

Editor’s Note: INDICATES A FREE EVENT. For the most up-todate calendar of events, check out our website, calgaryschild. com. Times and dates are accurate at time of printing; however, changes can occur. Always call ahead to conﬁrm. Calendar deadline for next issue is March 31, 2020. CCM

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 15

spring flings

the world’s foremost classically-trained dancers, a live orchestra blending East and West, and dazzling animated backdrops. To purchase tickets: shenyun.com/calgary

bump, baby & toddler guide

congratulations, you’re pregnant! now what? Many people are unaware that there are several choices for prenatal and perinatal education, so do your research. By Sharon Loose

he first step after finding out you’re pregnant is finding a caregiver. There are a few options in Calgary: family doctors specializing in maternity, obstetricians, and midwives. If you choose to go with a family doctor or an obstetrician, you will be referred to a specialist through your current doctor. It is important to speak to your doctor as soon as you know you are pregnant to make plans for care during your pregnancy. If you are interested in midwifery care, immediately reach out to try and get in touch with one of the many midwifery clinics in Calgary or surrounding area. To fill out a registration form for midwifery care, go to the Alberta Association of Midwives’ website, albertamidwives.ca/find. It is important to note that registering on their site is not a guarantee for acceptance because there are not enough midwives throughout Alberta, so reach out to individual midwifery clinics to inquire.

expectant parents, moms, dads, siblings, caregivers, and grandparents. Costs range from free of charge (one class for two hours) to $235 (10 classes for two hours). There are several private companies and associations that offer classes, as well. There are many philosophies and styles for preparing for birth and parenting, including Lamaze, HypnoBirthing, Birthing From Within, and the Bradley Method. Ideally, your instructor or educator should have training in multiple methods, so you get the best of everything. Prices vary. You can get some classes for free, there are stand-alone classes for $30 to $50, and there is also a series of classes ranging in price from $140 to $450. These classes are deﬁnitely not created equal, so make sure you get the information on class size, what topics are included, how many classes are included, your educator’s experience and training. Everyone has different priorities for the classes they want to take, so make sure the ones you choose include what is important to you.

The next step is seeking educational support during your pregnancy as well as for your upcoming role as a new parent Many people are unaware that there are several choices for prenatal and perinatal education, so do your research. In Calgary and area, you can register for prenatal and parenting classes through the Alberta Health Services Perinatal Education Program, Birth & Babies, birthandbabies.com. They offer over 30 different courses for everyone in your family and network:

Now it is important to consider your support team Are you considering a doula but unsure of what a doula’s role is? A doula will provide you with hands-on support and expertise to guide you during birth. They can provide you with informational support for common medical language and procedures used during labour, and they can help you navigate any decision-making you may encounter during this time. Physical support during labour can include helpful positions, massage techniques, and providing you with hot or cold compresses and

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hydration. Emotional support can include helping boost your conﬁdence, encouraging your efforts, and helping to keep you calm. In addition, a doula can enhance your partner’s support role, giving your partner suggestions on how they can help you, and showing your partner helpful tips to better support you. For a list of doulas in Calgary, visit Calgary Doula Association’s website, calgarydoulas.ca, or visit the Doula Match’s website, doulamatch.net. It is a good idea to interview several doulas to get a good match, and it is important to ask about their experience and fees as they can vary. Fees typically range from $700 to $1,400, depending on the doula’s level of experience. Once you have a baby, life can become overwhelming; having support postpartum can be a huge help In Calgary, Post Natal Helpers Ltd. provides part-time child care services for families with newborns, as well as toddlers, preschoolers, and/or special-needs kids. Among other prenatal classes, Kindred Hearts YYC offers a oneday weekend course on what to expect postpartum. Calgary Birth Essentials supports families through their pregnancy, birth, and beyond with childbirth education, birth and postpartum doula support, breastfeeding, and early parenting education. Considering a postpartum doula can be another great investment option. A postpartum doula can help you learn the skills involved with having a new baby such as swaddling, bathing and diapering, and they can also help you with sleep strategies, easy meal support, and supplies. A postpartum doula can help you get more rest or help with your newborn, so you can spend some time with your other children. Many postpartum doulas will do overnight shifts, as well. For a list of postpartum doulas available in Calgary, visit the Calgary Doula Association’s website, calgarydoulas.ca. Prices typically range from $25 to $40 an hour. Knowing the community resources available to you can help make this exciting time of transition a smoother ride. Be sure to have everything in place so you can enjoy your time during pregnancy, birth, and life with your new baby. Sharon is the owner of Calgary Birth Essentials. For more information, call 403-803-7467 or visit calgarybirthessentials.com. CCM

Take care of yourself to take care of your baby. By Christa Melnyk Hines

hroughout your pregnancy, you eat the right foods, drink plenty of fluids, rest, and try to keep stress to a minimum. You might think once your baby arrives that you can relax your self-care regimen but caring for yourself should remain a top priority to ensure the health of you and your baby. 1. Drink plenty of water. “The key to optimal recovery after delivery is fluid hydration with water,” advises Dr. Gina Petelin, OB/GYN. “This is important for replenishing your body after significant fluid losses.” 2. Nourish yourself. Before the baby arrives, assemble healthy meals ahead of time to stash in your freezer. In the midst of caring for a newborn, you’ll be less likely to eat poorly when you can quickly pop a nutritious, readymade meal into the oven or crockpot. Also, stock up on protein-packed snacks to keep your energy up, especially if you plan to breastfeed. Choose simple, healthy snacks like cheese sticks, almonds, chicken, yogurt, and energy bars. Consult with your physician to determine how many extra calories you should be consuming each day according to your activity level, weight, and if you choose to nurse. 3. Sleep when the baby sleeps. “Those first days home from the hospital, rest, rest, rest and spend as much time skin-to-skin with your baby as you can,” says Teresa Marshall, a birth and postpartum doula. “This will

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make for a smoother transition for baby from the womb to room and for mama, as well.” Tricia Walania, a postpartum emotional support program coordinator, says that rest is one of the best ways you can care for yourself. “Being rested helps you cope more effectively with both the physical and emotional changes,” she says. Unable to catnap? Relax with your eyes closed.

“Consult with your physician to determine how many extra calories you should be consuming each day according to your activity level, weight, and if you choose to nurse.” 4. Integrate gentle exercise. Many moms are surprised that they still look pregnant after delivery. Don’t panic; it’s normal, says Petelin. Although the uterus decreases in size right away, you will still appear to be about ﬁve months pregnant when leaving the hospital. By following a healthy diet and exercising according to your doctor’s instructions, you will get back to your pre-pregnancy body.

Often, friends and family members are eager to assist by holding the baby or watching siblings to give you a chance to nap, shower, go for a walk, or run an errand. “You have to take care of yourself in order to be able to take care of your baby,” says Walania. While social media can help you feel connected to the outside world, nothing can replace a deeply satisfying Be Well Postpartum – Continued on page 28

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be well postpartum seven tips for healthy recovery

Many moms enjoy group exercise activities where you will also experience companionship with other moms. Walking is also beneficial. Not only will you get exercise, a stroll around the block on a sunny day will do wonders for your emotional well-being and give you a boost of vitamin D. Take extra care if you’ve had a cesarean delivery and only gradually increase your activity level according to your doctor’s instructions. Recommendations include no driving the first two weeks postpartum and no heavy lifting (anything over 15 pounds, about 7 kilograms) for the first six weeks. 5. Expect hormonal changes. Many new moms feel overwhelmed, tired, anxious, tearful, or mildly depressed. “Exhaustion, hormonal changes, and isolation after the birth of a baby may lead to what is referred to as ‘baby blues,’” says Walania. “To some degree, this happens to everyone. It’s natural and not permanent.” Talk to your doctor if symptoms persist for more than two weeks. Anxiety and depression can also be linked to thyroid issues, low levels of iron and vitamin D. 6. Tap into your village. “I would recommend reaching out. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or just a visit,” says Marshall.

diaper bags 101 Balancing fit, function, and fashion. By Stacie Gaetz

ow important could choosing the ‘right’ diaper bag possibly be? As it turns out, very important! There is nothing worse than having your hands full with a bolting toddler and a newborn who has just had a diaper blowout in the middle of the mall and having to spend what seems like an hour digging to the bottom of your bag to ﬁnd the wet wipes while screaming at the top of your lungs to your wandering toddler, “Come back here!” Parenting is often done one-handed, so when it comes to deciding on a dominating diaper bag, accessibility is king! Sara Milliken, Assistant Manager of Customer Service at buybuy BABY® Calgary, says the biggest current trend in diaper bags is the fact that roughly 60 to 70 percent of the hundreds of bags the store carries are backpacks. “People are looking for easy, organized, quick, and convenient, and that is what they seem to be ﬁnding in the backpack-style,” says Dallas Duncan, Manager of buybuy BABY® Calgary. Milliken advises it is important you try on the backpack-style bags before purchasing as everyone is cut differently in the back and shoulders, and you want to make sure it is comfortable. “Fit is as important as fashion,” she says. The dominating diaper bag (ranked from lower to higher price range) Carter’s® Stow Away Diaper Bag Backpack This diaper bag backpack is buybuy BABY’s bestseller and adds effortless style and function: • Eight storage pockets • Insulated side pocket for beverages and food • Easy access built-in wipes pocket • Handy wipeable changing pad • Hangs neatly onto stroller with stroller straps • Adjustable, padded shoulder straps for hands-free wear • Easy-grab top handle for quick carrying • Unisex SKIP*HOP® Suite 6-piece Diaper Backpack Set Adorned with diamond quilted embroidery, this diaper bag comes equipped with accessories and easyaccess compartments:

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Itzy Ritzy® Boss Diaper Bag Backpack The Itzy Ritzy® Boss Diaper Backpack is the perfect blend of convenience, style, and comfort: • Roomy interior and easy-access opening • Numerous front and side pockets • Zippered closure • Top-carry handle • Comfortable shoulder straps • Mounted top pocket with access from the outside • Front pocket designed especially for a parent’s keys, phone, and other accessories • Raised rubber bottom so the bag does not sit directly on the ﬂoor

“Parenting is often done one-handed, so when it comes to deciding on a dominating diaper bag, accessibility is king!” 8. A toy. Every parent knows that the right toy or book can be a lifesaver when you spend those ﬁve minutes too long in line while out and about. The most effective toys are a mix of a stuffed toy and a teether and have many textures and sounds. 9. Extra clothes and diapers. Most expert parents recommend packing one per hour that you will be out and about. 10. Wet bag. Many high-end diaper bags come with a wet bag, but wet bags can also be purchased separately and can be lifesavers (or at least money-savers) when you need to keep messy clothes contained.

The top 10 diaper bag essentials 1. Nursing scarf. These can be used in a pinch for many things other than nursing including a blanket, stroller cover, burp blanket, bib, change pad… the list goes on. 2. Snack cup. The Boon® Squirt Silicone Baby Food Dispensing Spoon takes baby food, removes the jar, and packs it into a single utensil for convenient, onehanded feeding. 3. Sippy cup/water bottle/bottle. The Munchkin® Miracle® 360° Trainer Cup for older children is spill-free and its spout-less design enables your child to drink from anywhere along the 360o rim, and seals instantly when your child stops sipping to avoid messy leaks.

Stacie is a freelance writer, photographer, and mother of a delightful daughter, ﬁve, and silly son, two. CCM

Photo credit to Monica Nira Photography

With More Than 1500 Families Supported Serving Calgary &; Surrounding Areas

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bump, baby & toddler guide

4. Pacifier. The style and design of a pacifier is up to your baby’s preferences. However, many people choose to use a WubbaNub® as it includes a stuffed toy and soother in one, providing even more comfort for baby. 5. Wet wipes. In addition to a traditional-sized bag for diapers, we recommend the Aleva Naturals® Bamboo Baby® Pacifier and Toy Wipes to keep your little one’s items clean without the use of harsh chemicals. 6. Small diaper cream. One of the things you are going to want in the many pockets that come in a quality diaper bag is cream for those unpredictable rashes. 7. Hand sanitizer. We recommend Baby BUM® brand, which is an antibacterial spray hand sanitizer infused with oils and fruit extracts and is obtained from sugar cane alcohol, making it school-safe.

bump, baby & toddler guide

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ALBERTA HEALTH SERVICES - HEALTHY PARENTS, HEALTHY CHILDREN Website: healthyparentshealthychildren.ca ALBERTA HEALTH SERVICES PERINATAL EDUCATION BIRTH & BABIES Website: birthandbabies.com ✪ CALGARY BIRTH ESSENTIALS Phone: 403-803-7467 Email: info@calgarybirthessentials.com Website: calgarybirthessentials.com Calgary Birth Essentials is the premier spot to ﬁnd all of your needs from bump to baby. With over 800 families supported, we proudly offer highly-experienced prenatal educators and doulas to provide you with the education, support, and advocacy throughout your journey. We help you to gain conﬁdence in your pregnancy, birth, and early parenting so you can make this lifechanging transition knowing you are taken care of. (Please see our display ad on page 19) ✪ CALGARY PUBLIC LIBRARY Phone: 403-260-2600 Website: calgarylibrary.ca Did you know that Calgary Public Library cards are free? Your Library card provides access to free programs, books, movies, music, eBooks, and online magazines and newspapers for the entire family. The Library also offers free online homework help with Brainfuse - any subject, any grade. Try Beanstack! Receive a personalized, librarian-endorsed weekly book recommendation by

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✪ CENTRE FOR SLEEP & HUMAN PERFORMANCE Phone: 403-254-6663 Website: centreforsleep.com Now accepting patient referrals for pediatric sleep services. The Centre for Sleep & Human Performance is a fully accredited, medical sleep lab and testing facility that has been in operation for nearly 15 years. We provide sleep screening, initial consults, assessment, diagnosis, treatment and follow-up of the full spectrum of sleep disorders and sleeping problems. (Please see our display ad on page 28) FOOTHILLS CHILDREN’S WELLNESS NETWORK (THE) Website: foothillsnetwork.ca The Foothills Children’s Wellness Network is a collaborative network of people, communities, and early childhood services in the Foothills region, all working together to promote the importance of early childhood development. Together, we are coordinating and maximizing resources to support the growth and development of our children. ✪ G.R.I.T. (GETTING READY FOR INCLUSION TODAY) CALGARY SOCIETY 117, 4615 - 112 Avenue SE Phone: 403-215-2444 Email: info@gritcalgarysociety.com Website: gritcalgarysociety.com The G.R.I.T. Calgary Society offers a highly individualized home, community, and school-based education/therapeutic program designed to meet the unique needs and aspirations of the child and family. Our education/therapy teams have extensive experience and educational backgrounds in special education and pediatric therapy.

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✪ KIDS@ CHURCHILL PARK Phone: 403-266-4656 Email: admin@churchillpark.ca Website: churchillpark.ca Churchill Park is a fully licensed and accredited non-profit and charitable organization which has been welcoming families and their children since 1970! With over 40 day homes, five child care centres, and two out-of-school programs, we are leaders in offering early childhood education, and we provide exceptional and loving care to the families we so proudly serve! (Please see our display ad on page 27) ✪ KINDRED HEARTS YYC Phone: 403-975-8313 Email: danielle@kindredheartsyyc.ca Website: kindredheartsyyc.ca Are you pregnant and looking to gain a better understanding of your body, reduce your fear of labour and delivery, and bring your baby home feeling confident? Non-biased prenatal classes taught by a certified childbirth educator and registered nurse with labour and delivery experience. Classes are offered in several formats; weeknight classes, weekend intensive, and private in-home sessions. Class sizes are small so call today to reserve your space. (Please see our display ad on page 27) ✪ LA LECHE LEAGUE CANADA - CALGARY Phone: 403-242-0277 Website: lllc.ca Many mothers want to breastfeed their babies, but some stop sooner than planned. Connecting with La Leche League (LLL)

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We are a nonproﬁt charitable organization, and have provided services to children with disabilities ages 2.5 to 5.5 in the Calgary area since 1995. (Please see our display ad on page 20)

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✪ POST NATAL HELPERS LTD. Phone: 403-640-0844 Post Natal Helpers Ltd. provides part-time child care services for families with newborns, toddlers, preschoolers, and/or specialneeds children. While we are in the home, the parent has the option to stay to rest or to leave. Post Natal Helpers are available in the daytime as well as evenings and weekends. (Please see our display ad on page 28)

CHILD CARE & EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATION ✪ CALGARY FRENCH & INTERNATIONAL SCHOOL Phone: 403-240-1500 Email: admissions@cfis.com Website: cfis.com Calgary French & International School offers an enriched academic program within a full French immersion learning environment alongside a high-quality Spanish language program, vibrant arts and athletics programs. International curriculum, including IB Diploma, Round Square, and UNESCO affiliation fosters a strong, global ethic. Educating students today for tomorrow’s world and accepting applications for Preschool, Jr. Kindergarten, and full-day Kindergarten programs as well as for Grades 1 to 12. (Please see our display ad on page 29) ✪ CITY OF CALGARY (THE) PLAYSCHOOL PROGRAMS Two Locations Southland Leisure Centre: 2000 Southland Drive SW Phone: 403-648-6555 Village Square Leisure Centre: 2623, 56 Street NE Phone: 403-366-3900 Website: calgary.ca/playschool Preschoolers love to be active - they run, jump, sing, leap, and climb at every opportunity. Active learning develops active children who learn to make physical activity part of their lives. Our programs, designed for children 2 to 4 years old, promote learning through play, crafts, stories, and educational themes using a variety of resources and amenities under the guidance of our experienced instructors. We offer school-year programs from September to June, as well as seasonal and drop-in options

throughout the year. Registration for our 2020/2021 school year began in February 2020 and seasonal and drop-in program registration is ongoing. Visit us online to learn more or to register. (Please see our display ad on page 47 and the Back Cover) ✪ EARLY DISCOVERIES NURSERY SCHOOL Four Locations: Parkdale, Hawkwood, Kincora, and Thorncliffe Phone: 403-239-2444; 403-239-3444 Email: edns@shaw.ca Website: earlydiscoveries.ca Over 35 years in early childhood education! We believe a firm foundation will help your child succeed in their future educational pursuits. Emphasis is placed on intellectual, gross motor skill and fine motor skill development, and social and emotional growth. 1- and 2-year-old parented programs enhance early learning development and strengthen family and community relationships. 2.5-year-old unparented program with small classes provide a solid stepping stone to our 3-, 4-, and 5- (Kindergarten) year-old programs. (Please see our display ad on page 27) ✪ EDELWEISS PREPARATORY SCHOOL Phone: 403-282-4220 Email: epschool@telus.net Website: epschool.ca A Calgary’s Child Parents’ Choice Award winner for “Best Preschool” and “Honourable Mention” for 12 years! We offer STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Arts, Math), Jolly Phonics, Learning Without Tears curriculum, weekly Music classes, Science experiments with Captain Science, Spanish classes, daily Gym equipment and games, creative movement, and Yoga. Our literacy-rich program includes an Author of the Month study, author readings, journaling, and a Home Reading program. We have a monthly Virtues Program, Environmental Awareness program, Outdoor Education, Cultural, and Art presentations, and class field trips. Register for two-day preschool (for 3 year olds); two-, three-, or five-day Jr. Kindergarten (for 4 year olds); or Kindergarten. (Please see our display ad on page 19) ✪ FUN 2 LEARN PRESCHOOL Phone: 403-239-2033; 403-880-6711 Email: anita@fun2learnpreschool.com Website: fun2learnpreschool.com Our preschool has been established for more than 25 years. We offer a learning-through-play program for 3 to 5 year olds, offering two, three, and five half-day programs. Caring, qualified teachers provide a happy, stimulating environment for children to learn and play. We offer a non-volunteer program, but parents are always welcome in our bright and cheerful classroom. We supply a snack and juice. The facility is equipped with a large gym, where we play

games and use a variety of gym equipment for the last 15 minutes of every class. (Please see our display ad on page 20) ✪ KIDS U BRIDGELAND Phone: 1-855-805-4378 Email: reception@kidsu.ca Website: kidsu.ca Kids U Bridgeland is an accredited infant program that provides nurturing care in an imaginative, clean, and safe environment. In addition to offering full- and part-time care with a strong focus on early development, Kids U Bridgeland offers a unique Parental Leave Transition program, which helps ease the transition for new parents back into the workforce, and for infants to social interaction. (Please see our display ad on page 55) ✪ SEEDLINGS SPANISH PRESCHOOL Strathcona Community Centre Silver Springs Community Centre Banff Trail Community Centre Palliser Community Centre (Spanish and English Program) Phone: 403-210-0604 Website: seedlingspreschool.ca Seedlings Spanish Preschool is a Reggio-inspired program that offers a Spanish Immersion Program for 2.5 to 5 year olds. We believe that kids - like seedlings - have a huge potential and need a special environment to develop in. Seedlings Spanish Preschool offers an excellent, well-balanced program and caring environment in a small, cheery class setting for your child to grow and learn. (Please see our display ad on page 25) ✪ SUMMIT START Phone: 403-477-6460 Email: riverview@summitstart.ca Website: summitstart.ca For more than 10 years, Summit Kids has offered our program to Calgary and area families. Built upon the vision that children should be treated as individuals, Summit Start was born by request of the community to create a similar program for children 12 months to 5 years old. Our mission remains the same: to provide the highest quality care for our “Summit Kids,” ensuring an unparalleled learning experience where children can thrive on their own terms. (Please see our display ad on page 23)

CLASSES & PROGRAMS BOW HABITAT STATION Email: bow.habitat@gov.ab.ca Website: bowhabitat.alberta.ca Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide – Continued on next page

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 21

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can make the difference to reaching your breastfeeding goals. LLLC Calgary offers parent-to-parent breastfeeding support and information by email, over the phone, or at monthly meetings. Check us out at lllc.ca/ﬁnd-group-alberta or phone 403-242-0277 for more information or assistance; Facebook, facebook.com/ lalecheleaguecanada; and Twitter, twitter.com/LLLCanada. (Please see our display ad on page 24)

bump, baby & toddler guide

Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide – Continued from previous page

✪ CALGARY ZOO Phone: 403-232-9300 Website: calgaryzoo.com New discoveries daily for your preschooler! Watch the magic and wonder in their eyes as they run beside an otter swimming by, come nose to beak with a penguin, and learn and explore the wonderful world of bugs at the new Brawn Family Foundation Bugtopia Play Area! Explore three towers that will help your family learn about the importance of insects and bugs and what their roles are in nature. (Please see our display ads on pages 2, 6) LYCÉE LOUIS PASTEUR Phone: 403-243-5420, Ext. 123 Email: admissions@lycee.ca Website: lycee.ca Established in 1966, Lycée Louis Pasteur is Calgary’s premier French school. Our full-day preschool program allows your child to learn French, socialize, and acquire the basics of reading, writing, and numeracy. Maximum preschool class size: 16 students. Certiﬁed teacher and assistant are in each class. Teachers are certiﬁed by the French Ministry of Education. No prior French needed. Before- and after-school care available. Break week and summer child care available. ✪ MRU CAMPS Website: mrucamps.com Ready. Set. Go! MRU Camps now has week-long (half- and fullday) camps for kids aged 3 to 5. From running to reading, we have camps for every interest! Our camps focus on developing campers’ physical literacy through a variety of fun and engaging games and unstructured free play. We won’t promise that the campers will fall asleep in the car on the way home, but they should be pretty exhausted! (Please see our display ad on page 61) TRICO CENTRE FOR FAMILY WELLNESS Website: tricocentre.ca Trico Centre for Family Wellness wants your family to be active! VECOVA RECREATION CENTRE Website: vecovarecreation.ca ✪ YW CHILDCARE CENTRE Phone: 403-232-1594 Email: childcare@ywcalgary.ca Website: ywcalgary.ca/childcare The YW Childcare Centre has moved to Inglewood, just minutes away from downtown Calgary! YW Childcare is a licensed and accredited facility that offers full-time, part-time, and drop-in space for children up to 5 years old. We believe in quality childcare that

encourages your child’s individual development, emphasizing creative play and child-centred activities. Register today at ywcalgary.ca/childcare. (Please see our display ad on page 60)

ECO PRODUCTS & SERVICES ✪ ASPENCLEAN Phone: 587-353-3912 Email: calgary@aspenclean.com Website: aspenclean.com/locations/calgary-house-cleaning-andmaid-services Award-winning house cleaning service and natural cleaning products for your family. Whether you are looking for a premium move-out cleaning service, post-construction cleaning, or just a one-off home cleaning service, AspenClean is the right choice for you. We manufacture our own line of natural cleaning products available at health food stores in Calgary and online at aspenclean. com. (Please see our display ad on page 27)

CALGARY PHILHARMONIC ORCHESTRA Website: calgaryphil.com Share the magic of live music with your children! GRANARY ROAD Website: granaryroad.com Nibble on something delicious from a variety of food vendors while the kids explore the adventures of the Active Learning Park! ✪ HERITAGE PARK HISTORICAL VILLAGE Phone: 403-268-8500 Website: heritagepark.ca Day Out With ThomasTM provides an opportunity for kids to take a ride with their favorite tank engine, meet the railway controller, Sir Topham Hatt, have fun in the Imagination Station, enjoy face painting, musical entertainment, and much more! Get ready for The Big Adventures Tour at Heritage Park Historical Village in Calgary! For more information, visit the website. (Please see our display ad on page 46) KAYBEN FARMS Website: kayben.com Nature-play all day!

FAMILY DAY OUT ✪ BUTTERFIELD ACRES CHILDREN’S FARM 254077 Rocky Ridge Road NW Phone: 403-239-0638 Email: farmfun@butterﬁeldacres.com Website: butterﬁeldacres.com The magic of connecting with a world of wonderful farm animals (did someone say goats!), and all the real farmyard activities you’d expect from Calgary’s No.1 family farm! Visit April through September. More farm goodness happens with Addictive Day Camps for 3 to 14 year olds, Birthday Parties, Easter Hunts. Birthday Pony/Unicorn and Mini Farm can come to your home! Farm Corral Petting Zoo is available for bigger events. (Please see our display ad on page 15) ✪ CALGARY BABY AND TOT SHOW (THE) Phone: 403-249-1270 Email: calgarybabyandtot@gmail.com Website: calgarybabyshow.com A fun, two-day event held twice yearly, Spring and Fall for parents to be and families with young children. This consumer trade show is designed to offer everything one needs pre-baby, baby, toddler to school-age children. Come see local and national businesses showcasing the latest products and sharing information assisting parents and caregivers, educational seminars providing valuable parenting tips, parented play zones, and non-stop family entertainment! (Please see our display ad on page 17)

LOOSE MOOSE THEATRE COMPANY Phone: 403-265-5682 Email: mail@loosemoose.com Website: loosemoose.com STORYBOOK THEATRE Phone: 403-216-0808 Email: tickets@storybooktheatre.org Website: storybooktheatre.org

HOMES & COMMUNITY DEVELOPERS ✪ MATTAMY HOMES Phone: 403-769-1755 Email: info.alberta@mattamyhomes.com Website: mattamyhomes.com Offering Townhomes, Duplexes, and Single-Family homes at affordable prices in desirable locations within Calgary and Airdrie. Discover spacious interiors that accommodate active, modern households with elevated street appeal. Our sales centres offer all products out of one location to make it an easy one-stop-shop solution. Visit Southwinds, Carrington, Cityscape, or Yorkville today to learn about current promotions and Quick Move-in Homes. (Please see our display ad on page 32) Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide – Continued on page 28

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bump, baby & toddler guide

3 tips to get kids to stop waking the whole family What works for my family. By Pam Moore

hen pregnant with my second baby, I worried that a crying newborn would wake up my older child during the night. But motherhood has a funny way of surprising you at every turn. The baby never ended up waking the toddler. The problem was, our toddler woke up the baby. Loud outbursts at inappropriate times are essential job functions of a typical three-year-old, and ours was no exception. For many days, my three-year-old girl startled her little sister awake yelling well before sunrise, “It’s day! Can I come out of my room?” She also mastered the art of cutting the baby’s nap short whenever she tired of being in her room during rest time, shouting to come out. My baby is 15 months old now. I endured the madness for a year. But when we hit the year mark, two things happened: The baby was ﬁnally sleeping through the night, and my mental fog lifted. Instead of resigning myself to the status quo, I came up with solutions. Here’s what works for my family. 1. The quiet chart (aka bribery). I promise our older daughter that if she is quiet for ﬁve mornings in a row, she will be rewarded with a balloon. I made a chart

to track her progress using a scrap piece of paper, a marker, and Hello Kitty stickers. On the chart, we keep track of her success by placing a sticker on the days she

“With this system in place, baby sleeps past 7am versus being awoken by her sister’s shouting between 5:45 and 6:30 in the morning.” is sufficiently quiet and mark an “x” on the days she is not sufficiently quiet. Since she can’t read yet, I draw a picture of a girl with her pointer finger to her lips (the universal sign for “shhh”) and a balloon. We hung the chart in her room and every night at bedtime, we talk about how important it is to remember to be quiet in the morning. With this reward system in place, baby sleeps

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past 7am versus being awoken by her sister’s shouting between 5:45 and 6:30 in the morning. 2. The tot clock. The tot clock is an alarm clock designed for young children. The face can toggle between analog and digital. Even if your child can’t tell time yet or understand the numbers on the digital reading, when they press a button, the clock reads the time out loud. The ability to ask the clock what time it is anytime my daughter wants, instead of relying on me to tell her what time it is, gives her more control over her nap time. When she asks me if her rest time is over, I remind her that rest time is over when the alarm goes off. This makes the clock the bad guy - not me - thereby minimizing the frequency of screaming and crying that used to occur during almost every quiet rest. 3. Relocate nap/rest time. My house is a small ranch with a ﬁnished basement. The girls’ rooms are next to each other on the main level. One afternoon, in desperation, I carried my screaming toddler to the guest room in the basement, so she could at least cry without waking her sister. Since then, our eldest has been taking her afternoon rest in the guest room where she is allowed to bring in whatever books she wants. I have

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caught her jumping on the queen-size bed a few times, but I can’t say I blame her; the jumping doesn’t wake the baby, and that’s what matters. Pam helps women push through fear to become their best selves. To get her free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome, visit pam-moore.com. This article was originally published on BonBon Break. CCM

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planning ahead your go-to guide to packing for the birth centre Making sure you have what you need before baby comes. By Healthy Parents, Healthy Children

id you know that only 4 out of 100 babies are born on their exact due date?! You never know when baby will arrive, so plan what you can ahead of time! Even though it will be a short stay, taking the time to plan and pack for the birth centre helps make sure that you, your partner, or support person and new baby have everything needed to feel comfortable while there. Be ready to grab and go! It’s a good idea to have your bag packed and ready to go a few weeks before your due date - your baby could surprise you and come earlier than you think! Typically, labour starts between 38 to 42 weeks (about 1 to 2 weeks before or after your due date). Packing for you You don’t need much as your birth centre will provide many items you need. Take a housecoat, pajamas or other comfortable clothing, as well as cozy socks to keep your feet warm. You’ll also need 3 pairs of maternity underwear, 2 nursing bras, and loose-fitting or maternity clothes for going home. Moving around during labour can help move your baby along, so pack slippers or other comfortable shoes. For toiletries, bring: • a toothbrush and toothpaste • deodorant • shampoo • unscented lotion • feminine pads for heavier flows • breast pads • a blood glucose monitor (if you use one) Get in your comfort zone Staying calm and focused can help you work with your body and manage your pain during labour. You may find it helpful to make a list of ways to relax ahead of time, and pack the items that you might want to bring, such as: • your own pillows (use bright or patterned pillow cases so they don’t get mixed up with those the hospital provides) • a favorite picture (to help you focus) • an audio book, music, relaxation sounds, or something to read • a mobile device (remember to bring a charger) • a water bottle with your name written on it (staying hydrated is important!)

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a tennis ball and unscented massage oils or lotions for massage a Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation (TENS) machine if you choose to use for pain relief (rent or buy one as they are not always available at birth centres)

Remember You may not be able to leave to get food, so make sure your partner or support person has drinks and snacks for both of you. If you’re not bringing a cell phone, you’ll need coins for the payphone (yes, hospitals still have payphones!) and any phone numbers you may need. Packing for your baby Keep it simple: 1 or 2 receiving blankets, newborn diapers (cloth or disposable), a hat, 1 to 2 undershirts and sleepers, and clothes for going home. Look for clothes that are easy to put on and take off.

“It’s a good idea to have your bag packed and ready to go a few weeks before your due date your baby could surprise you and come earlier than you think!”

Your partner or support person Your partner or support person also may need a few essential items to keep them comfortable during your labour: • change of clothes • comfortable footwear • bathing suit (to support you in the shower) • toiletries and other personal supplies

The fine print Keep the following documents handy, so they’re easy to find when you arrive at the birth centre: • Prenatal Health Record (including a list of any medications you take) • Alberta Personal Health Card • Social Insurance Number • phone number of a relative or another contact person • your birth wishes (you can find a guide to this on healthyparentshealthychildren.ca)

Once you’ve packed, make sure that you and your partner or support person both know where the bag is stored so that you can grab and go! If you plan on using a birth ball, keep it close to your bag, too! And don’t forget: now is the time to install your rear-facing car seat for baby! Download the packing list for the birth centre from the Printables section of healthyparentshealthychildren.ca.

The Healthy Parents, Healthy Children (HPHC) team is part of the larger Healthy Children and Families Team at Alberta Health Services. Visit healthyparentshealthychildren.ca or ﬁnd them on Facebook. For questions or comments, email hphc@ahs.ca. CCM

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the importance of daily naps Since your baby cannot control their environment, they must rely on you to create a perfect napping situation for when they are tired. By Elizabeth Pantley

ewborns need to nap around eight hours each day. These nap hours are critically important to their health, growth, and happiness. Quality naps will help your baby sleep better at night, too! Sleep begets sleep when it comes to babies, so protect your little one’s nap times.

Create a cozy nap place Newborns want to sleep when they are tired, just like they did in the womb. But before birth, the environment was perfect for sleep: a controlled temperature, gentle darkness, the soft thump-thump of your heartbeat, and a ﬂuid cradle that gently rocked baby’s ﬂoating body. The world outside the womb is entirely different and often hinders sleep. Since your baby cannot control their environment, they must rely on you to create a perfect

napping situation for when they are tired. Provide your baby with comfortable bedding, cozy pajamas, and a dark place with gentle white background noise. Keep awake-spans short Your newborn can only stay happily awake for a short period of time (45 minutes to 3 hours) before needing to sleep again. Keep one eye on the clock and one eye on your baby (watching for signs of tiredness), and when it’s time for sleep, create a perfect environment for your baby’s nap. Don’t skip naps Newborns aren’t very ﬂexible when it comes to their sleep. Missing a nap can interfere with sleep for the remainder of that day and even the next day. So, if your newborn is fussy and not sleeping well, consider if sleep

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needs have been compromised and pay closer attention to helping your little one sleep well today. Before birth, your baby slept about 20 hours a day - and sometime more! Waking periods were random for very short periods of time. (Much of pregnancy movement was made during sleep.) After birth, newborns begin to consolidate their sleep into deﬁned segments. Quality naps help your baby’s sleep to be the best it can be. Set your baby’s biological clock Sleep is regulated by an internal body clock that primes us for wakefulness during the day and sleepiness at night. Babies are born with an undeveloped biological clock that takes many months to mature. While biology will largely dictate the maturity timeline of your baby’s bio-clock, there are many things that you can do to help the cause.

+ Things you can do - nighttime tips: • Feed your baby throughout the night whenever they are hungry • Keep night-feeding dark, quiet, and toy-free • Keep the house dimly lit in the hour before bedtime • Turn down the volume and make things peaceful in the evening • Maintain darkness throughout the night use only a tiny nightlight There are many environmental and social cues that can promote the development of your baby’s personal clock and move it in the direction of your own. It helps to be aware of these ideas, and they’re worth a try because they are easy to put into action. Newborn happily-awake span How do you help your newborn to be happier, sleep better, and be more peaceful? Respect your baby’s happily-awake span. The length of time that your baby is awake from one sleep period to the next will have a powerful impact on temperament and behavior. It will also affect how easily your baby falls asleep and how well they sleep.

they eventually wear out. This becomes a pattern that can disrupt sleep, growth, and temperament. Short awake periods equal a happier baby. If you want your baby to be peaceful, to cry less, and sleep better, keep one eye on your baby and one eye on the clock. Perhaps set your phone to buzz as a reminder that sleep time should be near - then watch for those telltale tired signs. Don’t let your newborn stay awake for too long at a time and sleep will come peacefully and easily at the right times.

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How to tell if your newborn is tired Your newborn is a unique person and will present you with individualized language. However, there are many similarities among babies. The majority of newborns signal tiredness in similar ways. Let’s talk about some common signals to give you a guideline as you begin the process of learning your baby’s language. Once you get through the ﬁrst few months, you won’t need a list as you will learn how to read your baby better than anyone else. In the meantime, knowing what things to look out for can speed the translation process. + Signs your baby may be tired: • A lull in movement or activity Quieting down, making fewer sounds • • Losing interest in people and toys • Looking away from you • Appearing glazed or unfocused; staring off in the distance • Limp, relaxed face and jaw • Fussing or whining • Eyes open and unblinking or slow, long blinks • Rubbing eyes, ears, or face • Not settling down in your arms, squirming • And, of course, yawning!

Newborns shouldn’t stay awake for very long The natural span of awake time is very short for a newborn and gradually increases over time. New babies can only stay happily awake for 45 minutes to an hour or two at the most. At about three months of age, some babies still need a nap every hour or two, but some can be awake as long as three hours, if they routinely sleep well at night and get good, long naps. By six months of age, most babies can stay awake for two to three hours. However, good sleepers and frequent-wakers alike do best with short awake spans interspersed with plenty of naps.

+ Other factors that can indicate tiredness: • Being awake for one to three hours Last sleep session was disrupted, and your baby • woke up before ready

Long awake time can be detrimental to your newborn Studies show that young babies who typically have long stretches of awake time during the day (more than three consecutive hours) appear to have more disjointed sleep and shorter sleep stretches. So, make sure your newborn isn’t staying awake past the time when they demonstrate their unique signals of fatigue. If your baby has been awake beyond this ‘happy awake span,’ you have likely missed some sleepy signals, and your newborn is overtired. An overtired baby will be fussy and ﬁnd it hard to sleep, yet won’t be able to stay happily awake, either. And the more overtired your baby gets, the more they will fuss and cry in frustration, until

+ Other factors that can indicate overtiredness: • Being awake for more than three hours

+ Signs your baby might be overtired: • Fretful crying (which can also indicate hunger) • Arching backward or going rigid • Uncoordinated movements of arms and legs • Chin down, head nodding loosely • Drooping eyelids, slow blinking, eyelid ﬂuttering • Dark circles appearing under the eyes; eyes appearing bloodshot

Get familiar with your baby’s unique sleepy signals and put your baby down to sleep the minute you spot the signs. It’s ﬁne if your newborn needs your help, so rock them or nurse them to sleep, right away, the moment they seem tired. Your reward will be blissful, easy sleep. Elizabeth is a mother of four, and author of the bestselling No-Cry Solution series on topics such as sleep, discipline, picky eating, and potty training. She is known worldwide as the voice of practical, respectful parenting. For more information, visit elizabethpantley.com. These tips are from The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Newborns by Elizabeth Pantley. CCM

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+ Things you can do - daytime naps: • Provide frequent feeding throughout the day • Make your baby’s awake times interesting but avoid over-stimulation • Have a bit of outside time daily, early in the day, when possible • Enjoy a few minutes of morning sunshine (either outside or by a window) • Aim for an early bedtime aligned with your baby’s signs of tiredness

bump, baby & toddler guide

Bump, Baby & Toddler Guide – Continued from page 22

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MEALTIME SOLUTIONS ✪ REAL CANADIAN SUPERSTORE Website: realcanadiansuperstore.ca Discover our great quality and variety of fresh foods, fashionable products for your home, and a complete pharmacy to serve all of your family needs. Find everything your baby needs through all life stages: Diapers, wipes, feeding, toys, and more. You will love our selection of President’s Choice Organic foods and stylish Joe Fresh clothing line. We bring you great prices on your favorite products and services, all together under one roof! (Please see our display ad on page 3)

MEDICAL, DENTAL & VISION CARE ✪ ALBERTA BLUE CROSS Phone: 1-800-AB-CROSS Website: ab.bluecross.ca As the province’s largest benefits carrier, Alberta Blue Cross provides health and dental coverage to more than 1.8 million Albertans. Alberta-based, not-for-profit, wellnessdriven, and customer committed - we support all Albertans. Every step of the way, every age, every circumstance - we’re here. We live in the communities we serve and serve in the communities in which we live by supporting a variety of organizations and causes across the province. (Please see our display ad on page 5) ✪ GROUP CALGARY ORTHODONTICS Market Mall Professional Building (Dr. Claude Boutin; Dr. Greg Barnett; Dr. Lorne Kamelchuk) Phone: 403-284-5202 Mission Centre Building (Dr. John Huynh) Phone: 403-228-5006 Website: groupcalgaryortho.com Our two locations offer diagnostic imaging and techniques that promote personalized treatments. We specialize in Speed, Damon, *Incognito braces, as well as Invisalign. Our commitment is to earn your trust, with the goal of giving our patients a beautiful smile to show off! We take pride in the relationships we build and the results we provide. We look forward to meeting you! *Available at our Mission office. (Please see our display ad on page 26) ✪ NORTH CALGARY PEDIATRIC DENTISTRY Phone: 403-295-8010 Website: northcalgarypediatricdentistry.com First tooth? First visit! North Calgary Pediatric Dentistry is always accepting new patients! Open 7am to 3pm with after-hour emergency care available, Dr. Rory Vinsky and Dr. Cameron Zealand are specialists in Pediatric Dentistry. Serving Calgary and neighboring communities in providing dental care for infants, children, and adolescents for over 20 years! No referrals necessary. Direct billing to insurance and zero interest payment plans are available. (Please see our display ad on page 22) ✪ PEDIATRIC HEADSHAPE CLINIC (THE) Five Clinics Across Canada Phone: 1-844-944-3237 Email: info@synergyortho.ca Website: pediatricheadshape.com Book now for your free consultation. Are you concerned about your baby’s headshape? The Pediatric HeadShape Clinic helps

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RETAIL - SECOND-HAND & CONSIGNMENT BABY & ME Website: babyandmematernity.com ✪ ONCE UPON A CHILD - VARSITY Phone: 403-543-1068 Website: onceuponachildvarsity.com Once Upon A Child Varsity offers over 2,500 square feet of topquality new and gently-used kids stuff! We carry clothing newborn to size 16, outerwear, sleepwear, shoes, baby and children’s gently-used toys, books, games, and DVDs. Our store also stocks those must-have baby equipment items such as exersaucers, bassinets, bouncy chairs, carriers, playpens, highchairs, swings, and more! (Please see our display ad on page 27) ✪ WASHED + WORN CURATED KIDS CONSIGNMENT Email: hello@washedandworn.ca Website: washedandworn.ca Welcome to your new favorite place to shop for kids clothing, shoes + accessories! We are a Calgary-based, online kids consignment store run by two local moms. We carry size 0 to 12 years + specialize in mid- to high-end brands, small shop + handmade preloved pieces. We offer free pickup for your consignment items + we have partnered with four local businesses in the city where you can pick up your order for free. (Please see our display ad on page 19)

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RETAIL - MATERNITY, NEWBORN, BABY & CHILDREN’S ✪ OOMOMO Located in Paciﬁc Place Mall Phone: 403-455-0188 Email: info@oomomostore.com Website: oomomostore.com Oomomo is a Japanese variety store in Canada. We stand for delivering affordable quality alternatives to your lifestyle. Our mission is to bring new and trending products in Japan to Canada every month. Our stores are ﬁlled with high-quality and stylish goods, all at an affordable price. From kitchenware, school supplies, organizers to beauty products, we’ve got you covered for every need. We are your one-stop for everything! All of our items have been tested in Japan, staying true to our core vision of authentic Japanese quality. (Please see our display ad on page 16) ✪ SUNRIDGE SHOPPING CENTRE Website: sunridgeshopping.com Sunridge has everything you need for your little ones. With brand names like The Children’s Place, Justice, Carter’s, DSW, Old Navy, and Winners, we have you covered from head to toe and everything in between. Check out our website for family-friendly events and promotions. Sunridge is the place to be for kids. It truly is Shopping for Everyone. Visit sunridgeshopping.com. (Please see our display ad on page 7) ✪ WELCOME WAGON Website: welcomerewards.ca Earn cash back effortlessly at your favorite retailers in-store and online with Welcome Wagon’s Welcome Rewards! Link your existing credit cards to Welcome Rewards and discover offers, shop with your linked cards at your favorite retailers and restaurants, and effortlessly earn Cash Back rewards. Cash Back is automatically deposited on your credit card statement every month! (Please see our display ad on page 39)

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Be Well Postpartum – Continued from page 17

conversation with a friend or a warm hug. Get together with a member of your family or friend for coffee, lunch, or a walk. If your network feels inadequate, join a mothers’ or parents’ group or look for parent-child gatherings in your community. In Calgary, great parent support groups include (but are not limited to) Alberta Health Services - Perinatal Services, Families Matter, and Calgary Outdoor Playgroup Community. The sooner you seek support, the faster you can start feeling like yourself again. “We don’t want anyone to miss out on the ﬁrst months of their baby’s life because they don’t feel like themselves and aren’t able to enjoy it like they had hoped,” says Walania. 7. Nurture your spirit. You may be a mom now, but you aren’t only a mom. Take time to do the things that have always brought you personal fulﬁllment and joy, whether that’s crafting, reading, relaxing in a warm bath, browsing at your favorite boutique, or lunching with a good friend. When you are happier and healthier, your baby will be, too. Christa is a nationally-published writer. She and her husband are the parents of two boys. CCM

how to prepare your dog for bringing home baby Teach your dog how to be safe with the baby and to encourage bonding. By Pam Moore

leep when the baby sleeps. Take a shower every day, no matter what. Have date night at least twice a month. Expectant parents receive lots of advice on how to prepare themselves for life with a baby. But what about preparing the family dog? Just like new parents, dogs need lots of support when welcoming a baby to the family. Before baby arrives Experts agree, making sure your dog is well-behaved before your baby arrives is key. According to Daryl Young, a world-renowned dog trainer with over 40 years of experience, “Training your dog establishes a way to communicate what you like and do not like to your dog. A dog that understands certain behaviors such as jumping, nipping, and pulling on a leash are not permitted will be much easier to control when making the introduction to baby.” Heather Corum, lead obedience instructor for Canine Company, advises parents to begin obedience training or take a refresher course as soon as they ﬁnd out they’re pregnant.

Caleb Backe, pet health and wellness expert, says one of the biggest mistakes people make is ignoring the bad behavior their dog is already displaying and expecting it to subside once the baby arrives. In reality, your dog is likely to have difﬁculty adjusting to the new family dynamic, which will only exacerbate the issues. And once the baby arrives, you won’t have time to train your dog. Even the most well-behaved dog will need help acclimating to a new routine (or lack thereof) when your baby comes home. According to experts, there are

“Even the most wellbehaved dog will need help acclimating to a new routine (or lack thereof) when your baby comes home.”

Once you bring baby home It’s never a good idea to leave your baby and your dog alone without parental supervision. No matter how well you know your dog, you can never assume they’ll react as you expect in any given situation. “Babies look, feel, and may smell like a dog toy. Dogs can easily and unintentionally injure or even kill a baby,” says Young. Corum cautions that even the most well-behaved dog “can become alarmed by [a newborn’s] strange noises and ﬂailing arms and legs and react suddenly, putting Get Rover Ready! – Continued on page 33

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plenty of ways to prep in advance. Young recommends taking your dog on walks or feeding them at different times than usual. Veterinarian Dr. Lisa Lippman recommends giving your dog less attention as your due date draws near. “Getting used to not constantly being the centre of attention will enable your dog to cope better once the baby arrives and takes up much of your time and energy.” It’s especially important to establish new routines well in advance in order to minimize the likelihood of your dog associating their schedule disruption with the baby. Experts also recommend getting your dog used to baby dolls and baby items in advance. Exposing your dog to dolls, strollers, onesies, blankets, and even baby sounds (with the help of an app) will not only help your dog get accustomed to the baby, but it will also create an opportunity to troubleshoot any issues (i.e. your dog nipping at the doll). Once the baby is born, Dr. Lippman encourages parents to bring home something the baby has worn before bringing the baby home. “Let the dog sniff it from a distance, and then allow them to get closer and closer.” Parents should also practice creating rules and boundaries in the nursery while it’s still unoccupied. Young advises parents to make certain things clear using a doll. “No jumping on crib. No pulling blankets or sheets that may hang down from the crib. Do not enter the baby's room unless invited by a parent. Once the baby is home, go through the same routines you practiced with the doll.”

bump, baby & toddler guide

injuries to children’s teeth Ensure your child has a beautiful smile now and for years to come. By Dr. Rory Vinsky

s babies start to crawl and explore, they meet many obstacles. Through the active years of childhood and adolescence, these obstacles may become more prevalent, and injuries causing damage to the teeth, bone, gums, cheeks, and lips are common. The most likely cause of dental injuries in kids are falls and tripping over objects. For young kids, playing near coffee tables or ﬁreplaces, running at the swimming pool, and wearing socks on a slippery ﬂoor are activities that often cause falls and dental injuries. And anyone who plays contact sports without the protection of a mouthguard also risks severe dental injury; a tooth may be knocked out, moved, broken. Baby teeth begin to appear at about six months of age. By two-and-a-half to three years of age, all baby teeth should be present. The exchange of baby teeth for adult teeth begins at about six years and continues until about age 13. Baby teeth are valuable in the growth and development of the mouth and its structures. They guide the adult teeth into their appropriate spots and aid

because a tooth changes color does not mean something needs to be done, but there is a chance something needs to be done so examination by your dentist is important. Teeth knocked out. For baby teeth, a knocked-out tooth is not replaced into its original spot; doing so may damage the permanent developing tooth beneath it. The success rate is also poor for reimplanted baby teeth. The lost tooth should be located. If not, an x-ray should be taken to see if the tooth has been pushed into the gums and bone. If the tooth still can’t be located, an x-ray to the chest and abdomen may be needed to see if the tooth has been swallowed or inhaled. A follow-up with a doctor may be indicated if the tooth is located in the chest or abdomen by the x-ray. Your dentist will want to make recommendations about the space that results after a baby tooth is lost due to injury. Sometimes, no further treatment is necessary. Other times, the space will need to be maintained so there will be enough room for the permanent tooth when it comes through.

“Given the variability in how a baby tooth can be injured, a follow-up with your dentist is very important. Although it may appear isolated, often more than one tooth is aﬀected by the injury.” in speech, eating, and appearance. If the baby teeth are lost or altered, these important functions can be affected. Injuries to baby teeth can have a dramatic inﬂuence on later tooth development. For this reason, all dental injuries should be evaluated by a dentist. If left untreated, some injuries can lead to nerve death with that tooth. In baby teeth, this can also damage the developing adult tooth associated with it. Injuries to baby teeth Bumped front tooth. This injury may occur when a child is learning to crawl. Fortunately, not all bumps loosen teeth. In the case of a concussion, the tooth may be loosened (subluxated), and bleeding may occur around the gums. This type of injury causes concern for your dentist because the tooth may be so loose that the child could inhale the tooth. Your dentist will also want to check the position of the tooth to ensure it has not been moved in a way that interferes with the child’s normal bite. Injured teeth may discolor by turning grey or brown. The color change may be the result of normal healing or a sign of an underlying infection developing. Just

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Broken teeth. For kids aged three to six, this is the most common injury. Your dentist will want to take an x-ray to assess the extent of the injury. Dental fractures may involve: • the enamel or outer layer of the tooth only (often minimal or no treatment needed). • the enamel and dentin. These need to be seen by your dentist as a sedative dressing is often required to soothe the tooth. The dressing also helps protect the pulp. A tooth-colored ﬁlling is placed over the sedative dressing and bonded to the tooth to restore the shape and your child’s smile. • the whole tooth where the nerve is exposed. You will notice bleeding coming from within the tooth. After the injury, you will want this checked by your dentist as soon as possible. The time elapsed since the injury will guide your dentist on the best course of treatment. Treatment may involve placing a sedative dressing over the exposed nerve or a partial or complete nerve

removal. A tooth-colored filling will be used to restore the tooth’s appearance. If left untreated, the tooth may become infected and develop an abscess. Sometimes, these injuries require the tooth to be removed rather than managing the injured nerve and keeping the tooth in place. • fractures of the root. The tooth portion above the fracture may need to be removed. Your dentist will discuss the option of removing the root below the fracture. If done, the developing tooth associated with it may be affected. If the root is left in place, your dentist will monitor it closely in case an infection develops. In the latter case, the remaining root will need to be removed. If you suspect any type of dental fracture, your child should be seen by a dentist to have the damage assessed and managed properly. Teeth pushed out of position (displacement). Sometimes when a tooth gets injured, it changes its position. You may find the tooth is in the way of your child’s closing the teeth together or the tooth may be pushed into the gums and bone; you will want to see a dentist. X-rays will be needed to assess the extent of the injury. If the crown is angled backward toward the tongue, it may represent a ‘favorable displacement’ or ‘favored injured position.’ This is because the root will have likely moved forward toward the lip. Since most top adult teeth are forming behind the roots of the baby teeth, this root movement will be away from the developing adult tooth. Although the baby tooth may need to be removed, it may not have affected the forming adult tooth. For teeth that are pushed into the gums and bone, often the tooth will be allowed to return to its original position. It is possible the adult tooth may have been damaged as the baby tooth was pushed into it. Your dentist will want to monitor this injury to ensure the tooth is re-erupting and to check that infection is not developing. Fractures of the jaw. Children will need emergency care immediately whenever there is significant injury involving the mouth. Given the variability in how a baby tooth can be injured, a follow-up with your dentist is very important. Although it may appear isolated, often more than one tooth is affected by the injury. Because of the close proximity of the developing permanent tooth to the baby tooth, your dentist will need to assess both in their examination. Injured baby teeth can cause damage to developing permanent teeth and/or change their position. Childhood dental injuries can have a long-lasting and serious effect, and may lead to discomfort, discoloration, altered tooth development, infection (if left untreated), or tooth loss so it is important to visit your dentist when an injury occurs to ensure your child has a beautiful smile now and for years to come.

Rory Vinsky, DMD, is a pediatric dental specialist at North Calgary Pediatric Dentistry. For more information, visit northcalgarypediatricdentistry.com or call his ofﬁce at 403-295-8010. CCM

Breaking down diet culture. By Malia Jacobson

“David’s mom is fat. She needs to go on a diet.” When my sweet kindergartner innocently uttered this line after school one day, I couldn’t hide my shock. After experiencing my own body image ups and downs, I’d tried to protect my young kids from talking about weight loss and dieting. Faking composure, I countered with, “Oh? Um, where did you hear that?” She explained, unfazed, “David’s mom said it herself. She was at school today and said to my teacher, ‘I’m fat and I need to go on a diet.’” “She said she doesn’t like her butt.” With a throwaway shrug, she skipped off to join her friends on the swing set. I was left swinging between anger that my ﬁve-year-old had been introduced, albeit accidentally, to the idea of dieting for weight loss, and relief that she hadn’t come up with the ‘too fat’ judgement herself. Mostly, though, I felt powerless. I’d tried to shield my child from diet culture and failed. Despite my efforts, the world’s message that our bodies are never good enough had found her. How diet culture hurts kids The term ‘diet,’ of course, isn’t necessarily a dirty word. But equating thinness with virtue and encouraging the pursuit of a physical ideal through food restriction - the ideas central to ‘diet culture’ - are problematic, says Amee Severson, RDN, whose work focuses on body positivity, fat acceptance, intuitive eating, and social justice. Though diet culture often passes for ‘wellness’ or ‘clean eating,’ it’s unhealthy, because people stop tuning into their own body’s signals about hunger and satiety, suggests Severson. By elevating thinness as the ideal physical state, moralizing food as good or bad, and promoting rule-based eating, diet culture disconnects people from their body’s nutritional needs. (That might be why despite widespread dieting, nearly all dieters regain lost weight within a few years.) Like any effort toward self-improvement, dieting is well-intentioned. It’s also completely normal and accepted in our society, but that doesn’t mean it’s good for our bodies or minds, says Severson. “Even when it’s called ‘clean eating’ or ‘wellness,’ making food choices that don’t come from your own body’s cues, food choices that come from rules or moral judgements about good food or bad food, is considered disordered eating.” Whether we like it or not, kids observe this type of disordered eating along with ideas about the right kind of body to have. Even well-meaning comments about body size from, “She’s really trimmed down! She looks great!” to “I’m just worried about his health,” can breed intolerance and exclusion at school and on the playground, says Severson. “Kids notice when we judge bodies or our own. Being fat is still viewed very negatively, and fat people are still the butt of jokes.”

Not surprisingly, kids quickly turn this type of judgement on themselves. Per research, the idea that other people’s fat bodies are inferior is linked to what researchers call ‘shape dissatisfaction,’ or unhappiness with one’s own body, along with dieting behavior in young children, disordered eating behavior, and eating disorders. Kids aren’t the only ones harmed by diet culture, of course. By marginalizing people who fall outside the societal ideal - in our culture, it’s white thinness - diet culture harms the mental and physical health of trans people, people with different abilities, people with larger bodies, and people of color, per Christy Harrison, RD, host of the Food Psych podcast.

“Families who prioritize health can do it in a way that doesn’t promote restrictive eating.” For Ivory Bruinsma, a certified fitness instructor who shares her journey with body acceptance through her Instagram account vibrantbrowngirl, rejecting diet culture meant rejecting the white standard of thinness. “I had to stop chasing white thinness and what white beauty looks like, because that’s what I mostly see in our culture,” says Bruinsma. Unlearning diet culture can take decades, says certified health and running coach Rose Coats, so it’s worth trying to prevent kids from absorbing it in the first place. Now a race director who organizes inclusive Sporty Diva run/ walk events, she models a healthier approach to food, one that doesn’t involve calorie counting, for her twin granddaughters. “It took me a while to get here, but I’m trying to show them a healthier way,” she says. Fight back against fat shame One way to fight diet culture: teach kids that ‘fat’ is simply another descriptor, not a bad word, says Severson. “Guide your kids that fat is just another descriptor; I have brown hair, you’re short, I’m fat. It’s just a body size, and not a moral indicator of a good or bad human. The more we can teach kids that, the more we can fight back against diet culture.” When well-meaning friends or relatives comment on your child’s size or food choices, a simple, “Please don’t comment on our food or our bodies” is in order, says Severson. “As parents, we’re the protectors of our children’s bodies.”

Families who prioritize health can do it in a way that doesn’t promote restrictive eating, says Bruinsma. A few years ago, her doctor advised weight loss after she survived stage-3 colon cancer. She resolved to ﬁnd a way to heal her post-cancer, post-chemotherapy body without succumbing to diet culture or exposing her kids to restrictive eating. “I was really hyper-aware about talking about weight loss in front of my kids,” she says. “They would ask why I was working out and I’d say, ‘Mama wants to be strong and play with you.’ If they saw me weighing myself, I’d say, ‘I’m checking how strong I am!’” Even if you don’t think they’re watching, your kids can pick up on your deeply-held beliefs about fat and thin, good and bad, and who is worthy of love, says Bruinsma. And before you can keep diet culture from consuming your kids, you might need to heal yourself. “When I started my body acceptance journey, I stood naked in front of a mirror, at 200 pounds, and named each body part and why I loved it: ‘I love my legs because they carry me where I want to go. I love my stomach because it carried three babies.’ No matter what my body looks like, I’m worthy and I’m enough.” For my part, I’ve found stronger footing since my daughter’s innocent introduction to dieting in her kindergarten classroom. Though I know I can’t completely shield her or her siblings from diet culture, now I know I’m strong enough to ﬁght back. And David’s mom, if you’re out there, you’re strong enough, too. Body-positive media to share with kids: • Chrissy King, chrissyking.com (social media account) • Body Posi Panda, bodyposipanda.com (social media account) Yours Truly Melly, yourstruelymelly.wixsite.com • (social media account) • Food Psych Podcast, christyharrison.com Books - Ages 0 to 5 • Shapesville by Andy Mills and Becky Osborn • Your Body is Awesome: Body Respect for Children by Sigrun Danielsdottir Ages 6 to 11 • Amanda’s Big Dream by Judith Matz • Meet ClaraBelle Blue by Adiba Nelson Ages 12 and up • 45 Pounds (More or Less) by Kelly Barson • Dumplin’ by Julie Murphy Malia is a health and parenting journalist. CCM

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parenting children diagnosed with ADHD Seven tips from the trenches. By Hillary Dinning, ND

ttention-deďŹ cit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is thought to be the most common childhood mental health disorder. Whether your child has been newly diagnosed or you and your child have been on this journey for quite some time, here are some tips. 1. Build your circle of support. Whether it be medical practitioners, educators, therapists, close friends and/or family, choose the people you feel that best support you and your child. As the saying goes, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;It takes a village,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; so lean on your village! Use them for increasing your knowledge on the diagnosis, bounce ideas off of them to ďŹ nd out what best suits you in supporting your child, and join forces in communicating a consistent message to your child about routine at school and home, when giving instructions in any setting, or deďŹ ning behavior consequences. These are your people that you can lean on when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re having a rough day or feeling joy on a good day. 2. Remove the label. When your child has been newly diagnosed, most parentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; initial reaction is to read up on as much as they can on what this disorder is all about. That makes sense - knowledge is key! However, the issue occurs when you start ďŹ tting them into a box. At the end of the day, each child is a unique individual. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re able to assess the root cause of their concerns, the signs and symptoms that present for them, their triggers, what seems to lessen behaviors, and what increases

them, you, along with the help of your medical team, can then treat on an individualized basis from a physical, mental, and emotional standpoint. 3. Support the gut/brain connection. The gut/ brain what? Yes! These are connected, and food can be a source of support for your child. Here are a few different ways. The brain makes a variety of chemical messengers (neurotransmitters) that, when transmitted along the nerve connections in the brain, can cause calmness, happiness, and alertness. Protein sources play a role in creating these neurotransmitters and good fats, namely omega 3s, play a role in building the nerve connections. A diet that can help to reduce inďŹ&#x201A;ammation in the body can help to increase calm communication in the brain and therefore reduce hyperactive behavior, as well. 4. Bust a move! Movement and more movement. You would think with some of these little munchkins, how could you suggest more movement?! Movement is medicine. In fact, high intensity movement is the best source. In these little ones, this gross movement helps them to build spacial awareness in their world. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s allowing them to connect with the earthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s movement and provides a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;groundingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; to their ever-spinning thoughts in their head. 5. Behavior. ADHD diagnosis or not, guiding children in their behavior to be stand-up human beings is one of the hardest jobs as a parent! (If anyone has written a

manual on this, send it over.) Children are not born with ďŹ lters; their inner lights shine brightly. Encourage this light to continue to shine. Now balance this out with teaching social graces, about â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;being polite,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; and respecting other peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s space - go! This is not an easy task. However, by encouraging their light to shine, they will grow into a talented, dynamic, intelligent, and conďŹ dent human being with an internal moral compass which, in the long run, can encourage those social graces. 6. Take care of yourself. Point number ďŹ ve is a perfect segue way into talking about parent selfcare. Being in the presence of hyperactive behavior or repeating an instruction numerous times can be exhausting and will test your patience. This is okay. This doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make you less of a parent. This makes you human. What is your way to ďŹ ll up? What helps you to quiet your nervous system? What is it that brings you joy? Do that. Because we know that it will make you the best parent you can be. 7. Listen to the answers that come from being with your child. At the end of the day, after all the reading you do, all the listening you spend time doing with various practitioners, all the tips you get from strangers, take it all in for consideration and then leave it at the door. With any dilemma that comes up for your child and/or family, the most honest, pure, and helpful answers on how to navigate through will be right in front of you. This is not to say that it is your responsibility for â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ďŹ xingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; them singlehandedly on your own. This is meant to comfort you in knowing the answers are right in front of you! No two individuals or families are alike and what works for one versus the other will be different. So, when you take some time to marinate in your environment together, what is it that your child needs? What is it that you need to feel healthy navigating through this? The answers will come if you let them. Hillary Dinning is a naturopathic doctor based in Calgary with a focus in pediatric medicine. Working with ADHD, autism, genetic differences, digestion, skin and hormones, her passion lies in supporting children to grow into healthy and vibrant human beings! For more information, visit thepediatricnaturopath.com. CCM

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what to do about ﬁrst-born jealousy When your child knows that you understand their feelings, they’ll have less need to act up to get your attention. By Elizabeth Pantley

hat should you do if your firstborn is showing jealousy toward the new baby? What if your firstborn is mad at you for disrupting the predictable flow of their life with this new challenger for your attention? Here’s how you can smooth things out. Think about it from your child’s point of view. Before the new baby entered your family, your child was told to expect a wonderful little brother or sister to play with, and how much fun it will be. Then the baby is born, and your child is thinking, ‘Are you kidding me? This squirming baby that takes up all of your time and attention is supposed to be fun?’ Your kiddo then ‘plays’ with the baby in the only way they know how. They play catch. You yell at them for throwing toys at the baby. How about hide-andseek? You get upset and pull the blanket off the baby. What about giving the new sibling a nice big hug? You admonish your child to be more careful. It’s no wonder that your firstborn is confused. Be a teacher. Your first goal is to protect your new baby. Your second goal is to teach your older child how to interact with their baby sibling in proper ways. Teach your child how to play with baby in the same way you teach anything else: Talk, demonstrate, guide, and encourage. Until you feel confident you’ve achieved your second goal, however, do not leave the children alone together. Yes, I know. It isn’t convenient, but it is necessary, maybe even critical. Get good at hovering. Whenever the children are together, hover close by. If you see your child about to get rough, pick up the baby and distract the older sibling with a song, a toy, an activity, or a snack. This action protects the baby while helping you avoid a constant string of ‘Nos,’ which may encourage more aggressive behavior in your older child. Teach soft touches. Teach the older sibling how to give the baby a back rub. Explain that this kind of touching calms the baby and praise the older child for a job well done. This lesson teaches the child how to be physical with the baby in a positive way. Demonstrate with your actions. Children learn what they live. Your older child will be watching as you handle the baby and learning from your actions. You are your child’s most important teacher. You are demonstrating in everything you do, and your child will learn most from watching you. It can help to narrate your activities with the baby - and if you do it in a sing-song voice, this is beneficial for your new little one, also. Praise, praise, and more praise. Whenever you see your older child touch the baby gently, or play appropriately, make a positive comment. Make a big fuss about the important ‘big brother’ or ‘big sister’ role. Hug and kiss your older child, because your affection is the highest praise. Watch your words. Don’t blame everything on ‘the baby’: “We can’t go to the park right now; the baby’s

sleeping.” “Be quiet, you’ll wake the baby.” “After I change the baby, I’ll help you.” At this point, your child would just as soon sell the baby! Instead, use alternate reasons: “My hands are busy now.” “We’ll go after lunch.” “I’ll help you in three minutes.” Be supportive and understanding. Acknowledge your child’s unspoken feelings, such as, “Things sure have changed with the new baby here. It’s going to take us all some time to get used to this.” Keep your comments mild and general. Don’t say, “I bet you hate the new baby.” Instead, say, “It must be hard to have [mommy/daddy] spending so much time with the baby.” When your child knows that you understand their feelings, they’ll have less need to act up to get your attention.

“Teach your child how to play with baby in the same way you teach anything else: Talk, demonstrate, guide, and encourage.” Give extra love and affection. Increase your little demonstrations of love for your child. Say extra I love yous throughout the day, increase your daily dose of hugs, and ﬁnd time to read a book or play a game. Temporary regressions or behavior problems are normal and can be eased with an extra dose of time and attention. Get them involved. Teach the older sibling how to be helpful with the baby or how to entertain the baby. Let the older sibling open the baby gifts and take pictures of the baby. Teach them how to put the baby’s socks on. Whenever possible, praise and encourage your older child when they help out with baby. Make each child feel special. Avoid comparing siblings, even about seemingly innocent topics such as birth weight, when each ﬁrst crawled or walked, or who had more hair! Children can interpret these comments as criticisms. Take a deep breath and stay calm. This is a time of adjustment for everyone in the family. Reduce outside activities, relax your housekeeping standards, and focus on your current priority: adjusting to your new family size. Elizabeth is a mother of four, and author of the bestselling No-Cry Solution series on topics such as sleep, discipline, picky eating, and potty training. She is known worldwide as the voice of practical, respectful parenting. Check out her latest book available to purchase on Amazon, The No-Cry Sleep Solution - Second Edition. For more information, visit elizabethpantley.com. These tips are from The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. CCM

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the baby in danger.” She advises parents to always stay between the dog and the baby and to keep the baby elevated in case of sudden moves. Even the most loving dog will feel miffed by the new baby’s arrival. To minimize jealousy, professionals encourage parents to give dogs as much focused attention as possible. Corum advises new parents to continue to praise their dog and maintain their functional obedience. Dr. Lippman says parents should try to engage with their pup while the baby is in the room. “You don’t want your dog to think that good things happen for them only when the baby is out of sight or asleep.” While you can give your dog snuggles, treats, and positive reinforcement without taking too much time out of your hectic day, Backe says not to skimp on giving your dog adequate exercise. He suggests hiring a dog walker a few times a week if getting out with your dog for regular walks isn’t realistic. As eager as you may be for your newborn to snuggle up with your four-legged baby, you should never force a relationship. Backe reminds parents that initially, it’s natural for dogs to be wary of a new baby. He says to be patient and remember that your child and dog will have plenty of years to become buddies. Dr. Lippman advises parents to take it slow when introducing your dog and your baby. “Allow your dog to sniff the baby from a distance, then gradually work up to closer contact.” To teach your dog how to be safe with the baby and to encourage bonding, Corum has speciﬁc guidelines: “Praise him when he sniffs or gently nuzzles the baby. Say ‘no’ ﬁrmly if he gets too excited, then immediately give praise when he calms down to help him understand what type of behavior is appropriate around this tiny new friend.” Dogs know when you’re pregnant (or scared, sad, or about to take them to the vet). But your dog’s unique ability to tune into human emotions doesn’t necessarily mean your dog will become a baby whisperer once your new bundle of joy arrives. Your dog will need plenty of help managing the transition. But with pro tips up your sleeve, love in your heart, and treats in your pocket, you’re just the one to help your dog. Pam helps women push through fear to become their best selves. To get her free guide to crushing Impostor Syndrome, visit pam-moore.com. This article was originally published on Motherly. CCM

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let it go seven things about parenting to stop worrying about When you accept that you are doing the best you can for your kids, you will be able to cross worry off your list. By Sarah Lyons

orrying, it’s something all parents do. I know I am guilty of it, especially when I lie awake in the wee hours of the morning with the silence of the house ringing in my ears. I worry about what I forgot to do, what I need to do, what I should have done, and what I already did. Let’s face it, parenting is hard. There is always something to be done, someone in the household who needs assistance, and many things to worry about including feeding your kids healthy food, your children’s friendships, and what other parents think about your parenting choices. Some worries are valid, but many worries are not worth your time and effort. What if you could learn to let these worries go? Personal expectations. Before I became a parent, I had unreasonably high expectations for myself as a mother; I had things I wanted to do and things I declared I would never do. After my ﬁrst child was born, I quickly realized that most of my pre-child declarations changed and were out of reach. “Let go of the idea that you will be the perfect parent because it won’t happen,” says mother of twins Aly Ridgeley. When you accept that you are doing the best you can for your kids at that particular moment, you will be able to cross worry off your list. Guilt. Do you worry you don’t spend enough time with your children? Do you feel guilty you were not able to breastfeed a child, or you missed a child’s soccer game? Do you feel bad you forgot to remind a kid to grab their lunch on the way out the door to school? The

guilt can weigh heavily, but let it go. It is okay if you miss your child’s sports game or school party. We all have to make choices in life and sometimes those choices can cause unnecessary guilt. Once a decision is made, move forward and let go of the feelings of guilt because they will only rob you of enjoying the present moment. Outward appearances. A tidy house; a perfectly decorated home; an amazing wardrobe; all organic, home-cooked meals; the perfect marriage; smart, athletic, creative children; and a partridge in a pear tree. We all want this and we all want to be perfect in life, or at least appear that way to others. This picture is lovely, but it is not a realistic, reachable goal. It is easy to get caught up in what our family looks like compared to others. It does not matter if your children wear perfectly coordinated outﬁts. Is your child dressed in weatherappropriate clothing? Great. Does it match? It’s your lucky day. Social media puts so much pressure on us to keep up with what we believe others are doing. I have a secret for you: Pinterest is not real life and what most people post on Facebook is the best of what happened in their life that day, not what is a typical day or the worst thing that happened in their life to them that day. Embrace the fact that no one is perfect and nobody’s expecting you to be either. What-ifs. As a parent, you may often worry about things that haven’t happened: What if a child gets seriously ill? What if they fall and get hurt? What if they don’t make the sports team? What-ifs are not worth the

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energy they use. Acknowledge all of the what-ifs in your head as unnecessary and detrimental to your well-being and decide not to waste your time worrying. Face the problems in front of you rather than worrying about issues that do not exist. Comparisons. “Don’t compare yourself to other parents. Your family is unique. Your circumstances are unique. It would be like comparing apples to oranges,” says Lacey Rodriguez. “Do the best you can for your family and forget the rest.” Comparing yourself to other parents is never a good idea. Your parenting style for your children will always be different from others but your parenting style doesn’t mean it is bad. Another pitfall parents fall into is comparing their children to their children’s siblings or other children their age. Each child has their own unique personality and will develop at their own rate. If you feel your concerns regarding a child’s development are valid, consult your child’s doctor for peace of mind. Mistakes. Every parent makes mistakes and it is easy to spend time worrying about what you should have done differently. The past cannot be changed and although not easy to do, let go of things you cannot change. Learn from your mistakes and continue to do your best. You have permission to let go of past mistakes and teach your children to do the same. Control. I am a recovering control freak. I wore down a little more with each child I added to my family. When my triplets arrived, it ﬁnally dawned on me that I am not in control. Once I realized (and accepted) this fact, a weight lifted off my shoulders. Yes, my husband and I are still in charge of the household, but I cannot control what happens in life. It’s a roller coaster. Instead of trying to steer the roller coaster, throw your arms up in the air and enjoy the ride! Learning to let go of parenting worries usually leads to feelings of relief. If you remember that every family is unique and every parent handles situations differently, it is easier to relax and enjoy your family more. Sarah, mother of six, has learned to let go of many things over the years to maintain a happy and functioning household. CCM

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contests Parenting on the Go with Carter’s®! The Carter’s® Stow Away Diaper Bag Backpack adds effortless style and function to any parent! This diaper bag backpack features a roomy main compartment with eight storage pockets; insulated side pocket for beverages and food; hangs neatly onto a stroller with stroller straps; has adjustable, padded shoulder straps for hands-free wear; an easy-grab top handle for quick carrying; and a built-in wipes case and changing pad for easy changes. Purchase in-store at buybuy BABY® or visit bedbathandbeyond.ca.

For your chance to win the Carter’s® Stow Away Diaper Bag Backpack, click on ‘Contests’ at calgaryschild. com and enter the code: Carter’s. Entry deadline is April 13, 2020.

Spend a Sunday at the Symphony! Beethoven Lives Upstairs. A young boy is upset when Beethoven moves in upstairs because the composer, being completely deaf, is too loud! Join the Calgary Philharmonic Orchestra and Classical Kids Live at this family-friendly concert exploring the noisy life of Beethoven as he works on his ninth symphony. This concert is part of the Symphony Sundays for Kids series - come an hour early to try an instrument and meet musicians at the Instrument Discovery Zoo! To purchase tickets, visit calgaryphil. com. Feeling Social? Follow on Facebook, facebook.com/ calgaryphil, and Instagram @calgaryphil. For your chance to win a family pack of 4 tickets (for 2 adults and 2 kids) to Beethoven Lives Upstairs on May 31, click on ‘Contests’ at calgaryschild.com and enter the code: Beethoven. Entry deadline is May 18, 2020.

A Bundle for Your Baby Joy! Playtex® Baby Diaper Genie® Quick Caddie: The only 2-in-1 portable diaper pail and caddy that organizes all your diapering essentials with accessible compartments for diapers, wipes, and lotions. The caddy is made from durable, lightweight, easy-toclean plastic with built-in antimicrobial that inhibits the growth of bacteria on the pail. The built-in carry handle makes it easy to take it wherever you need. The innovative double clamp helps prevent odors from escaping. The pail holds a day’s worth of diapers (eight to 10 newborn-sized diapers) and contains a built-in cutter to make changing the bag easier. The Diaper Genie® Quick Caddy uses Diaper Genie reﬁlls.

fraud awareness By Chief Constable of the Calgary Police Service Mark Neufeld

n Canada, March is National Fraud Prevention Month. This year marks the 16th anniversary of the national campaign, with the Calgary Police Service partnering with several local, provincial, and federal organizations to help educate citizens about common types of fraud. It may surprise you to know that a typical ‘profile’ of a scam target or victim does not exist. Scammers target citizens from different backgrounds, ages, and income levels and are constantly changing the methods they are using to scam citizens. Your friends, neighbors, parents, siblings, and even your children could be targeted as they start to get identification cards and bank accounts. The goal of Fraud Prevention Month is to work collaboratively with other partner agencies to help communicate relevant crime prevention messages that can help you and your family accomplish three important actions: recognizing, reporting, and stopping fraud. Recognizing fraud. I ask you to take a moment and think about the first type of scam that comes to mind. Maybe it’s the Canada Revenue Agency scam, or an off-shore investment scam, or perhaps a fraudulent text message that appears to be sent from a local bank. Regardless of the type of scam, fraudsters often try to use high-pressure tactics to get you to act quickly. They also prey on emotions and trust or promise extravagant rewards for very little work or effort. Encouraging your kids to take time to ask questions, talk to a trusted adult, and dig deeper into what’s being asked of them is essential when trying to recognize a fraud or a scam. And, if it’s too good to be true, it’s most likely a scam. Reporting fraud. Despite our best efforts to protect our kids, it’s inevitable that kids, or even ourselves, sometimes end up in sticky situations. If this happens, you or your child may feel embarrassed or ashamed and want to stay silent instead of reporting your experience. I cannot stress enough how important it is to always report a scam that you or your child has fallen victim to. Police and law enforcement can only investigate what’s reported to us, and by reporting your experience, you are helping to protect others. If you or your child have shared personal or financial information that has been used fraudulently, you can report it to the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre, the Calgary

Police Service, or credit monitoring companies like Equifax or TransUnion, or other law enforcement agencies. Stopping fraud. By educating families about common scams and reporting fraudulent activity, we are working together in the fight against fraud. Whatever the scam, the tactics are always changing but the end goal is the same: Fraudsters want your personal information, your money, and your identity; that’s why it’s important to teach your children the red flags of common scams, so they know how to protect their personal information. The Calgary Police Service would like to remind you to: Protect your personal information. A lost wallet, phone, or a misplaced ID is often enough to give scammers everything they need to commit identity theft or make fraudulent purchases. To protect yourself, always make sure you only carry the items you need on a day-to-day basis. Leave any cards or documents you don’t use every day, such as SIN cards, bank statements, spare credit cards at home in a safe location. Don’t overshare. Never provide more personal information than needed. For example, your Social Insurance Number should only be given to employers once you have been hired. If a company that has your personal information has been breached, you should immediately change any online passwords associated to that company and contact them to find out if you’ve been impacted. Be suspicious of unsolicited emails, texts, or phone calls. Many scammers will try and contact unsuspecting citizens to gain personal information and victimize them in the future. If you receive any strange requests, never provide your personal information and cease communication immediately. Follow the Calgary Police Service on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for more Fraud Prevention Month information and to stay up-to-date on current scams and crime prevention tips.

Playtex® Baby Diaper Genie® Max Fresh™ Refills: The No. 1 selling diaper pail brand deserves a new refill! Playtex® Baby Diaper Genie® Elite: The No. 1 diaper disposal system. With the Diaper Genie® Elite Odour Lock System, a double-lock design helps contain germs and seals away odors each time you drop in a dirty diaper. With colors including grey, blue and pink, along with classic white, you’ll be able to decorate with the Diaper Genie® Elite, no matter the theme of your nursery. Holds up to 270 newborn diapers. Playtex® Baby VentAire® Newborn Gift Set: The Playtex® Ventaire® bottle is uniquely designed to reduce colic and reflux, with doctorrecommended features including the bottom vent for air-free feeding and an angle for more upright feeding. The micro-channel vents keep air at the back of the bottle as baby drinks, so virtually no air mixes with the milk and gets

into baby’s tummy meaning less gas, spit-up, and overall fussiness. The angled design promotes a semi-upright feeding, which is recommended by pediatricians to help prevent symptoms of reﬂux. The NATURALATCH® ‘most like mom’ nipple is clinically proven to mimic baby’s latch-on for easy, natural feeding.

Stay safe. Mark Neufeld is the Chief Constable of the Calgary Police Service. CCM

For more information, visit playtexbaby.com. Playtex® Baby is available to purchase at leading retailers. Feeling Social? Follow on Facebook, facebook.com/PlaytexBaby, and Instagram @playtexbaby. For your chance to win this bundle of Playtex® Baby products, click on ‘Contests’ at calgaryschild.com and enter the code: Baby. Entry deadline is May 18, 2020. Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 35

community connection

COMMUNITY CONNECTION

calgary cares

calgary cares Calgary Cares is a free forum designed to match those with needs to those willing to help. If you work for, volunteer for, or know of a charity that needs some support, please let us know so we can tell our readers.

Help is Just a Phone Call Away! 211 Community Connection (24 hours) Dial 211 to get connected to the community services you need . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 211 AADAC Help Line (24 hours) Phone . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-866-33AADAC (2-2322) Adult Counselling and Prevention Services . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-297-3071 Youth Services . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-297-4664

Infertility Takes Hope Away, Generations of Hope Gives It Back

Alberta Children’s Hospital Child Abuse and Mental Health Program Phone . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-955-5959 Alberta Health Services – HEALTHLink Alberta 24-hour line providing health information. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 811 Calgary Communities Against Sexual Abuse 24-Hour Crisis Line and support for people who have been sexually abused/assaulted and their families . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-237-5888 CCIS Parent Link Family Resource Centre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-6686

Provided by Stacie Gaetz

The Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre Healing Looks Different for Everyone Provided by the Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre The Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre is a nonproﬁt organization whose mission is to provide low-cost access to holistic healing supports to people who are navigating the journey through pregnancy or infant loss. The journey through loss is complex, and the Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre knows that not everyone heals in the same way. For this reason, the Centre provides low-cost access to holistic support to individuals who might not otherwise know about them or are able to afford them - supports proven to be pivotal on the path to healing. They also believe in the power of connection and community. The Centre serves as a safe space for women and families to connect to their community and truly know, see, and feel that they are not alone. The Centre provides: • A peer mentoring program • Workshops • Community events • Volunteer opportunities • Drop-in hours • Access to loss, birth, and Postpartum Doulas • Connection • Specialized coaching • Yoga (including prenatal and family Yoga) • Reiki • Meditation (individual and group) • Massage • Acupuncture • Reﬂexology • Peer support healing circles Whether you have just experienced a loss, are deciding to try (or are actively trying) again, are pregnant, have given birth after previous loss, or want to connect to the community, there is support for you! The Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support Centre is dedicated to supporting individuals of all faiths, ethnicities, sexual orientations, and gender identities. Your generosity helps reduce the isolation, stigma, and mental health challenges individuals and families experience after pregnancy or infant loss. By donating, you are helping to provide options that support individual healing, so people can heal in their own way and on their own terms. For more information about these services and to donate, visit pregnancyinfantlosssupportcentre.com. CCM

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Being told you may never have children naturally is crushing. For one in six couples in Canada who face infertility challenges, this devastating news is compounded by the fact that the medical procedures that can help lead to a successful birth cost ten of thousands of dollars. Laurel Halladay realized she wanted children late in life but when she did, she knew her future needed to include kids. “When one of the Calgary Regional Fertility Program (CRFP) staff mentioned the Generations of Hope (GOH) Fertility Assistance Fund, I applied right away - covering any kind of fertility intervention on my single income clearly presented a major financial hurdle,” she says. “It was such a relief to have financial help, and I think the resulting reduced stress level was an important factor in getting pregnant with twins on my first round of IVF.”

Children’s Cottage Crisis Nursery 24-hour child care for parents in crisis . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-233-2273 Child Abuse Hotline Report child abuse-24 hours . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1-800-387-KIDS Community Resource Team 24-hour mobile crisis team . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-299-9699 Developmental Disabilities Resource Centre of Calgary Offers a number of respite options for families with a child with a disability 8:30 am to 4:30 pm, voice message after hours . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-240-3111

Distress Centre Calgary 24-hour crisis line. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-HELP (4357) ConnecTeen – 24-hour youth support line. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-264-TEEN (8336) Early Start Support for Families with New Babies Seven days a week, 24-hours a day support . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-244-8351 Families Matter Society . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-205-5178 Hospice Calgary Grief Counselling . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-263-4525 Kids Help Phone . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-800-668-6868 La Leche League Breastfeeding Support . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-242-0277 Mental Health Help Line 24 Hour Help Line . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-877-303-2642 Mental Health Crisis Line (Mobile Response Team). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-1605 Canadian Mental Health Association . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-297-1700 Suicide Services . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-297-1744 Missing Children Society of Canada Organization dedicated to the search for abducted and runaway children . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-800-661-6160 Parent Support Association 24-hour self help for parents of children nine and up . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-270-1819 Poison Centre Calgary. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-944-1414 Alberta. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1-800-332-1414 Ronald McDonald House® Southern Alberta A home away from home for out of town families with seriously ill children in the Calgary Hospitals – 9 am to 9 pm. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-240-3000 Shelters (all 24 hour access) Calgary Drop-In Centre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-3600 Children’s Cottage Crisis Nursery . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-233-2273 Women’s Emergency Shelter. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .403-234-SAFE (7233) Sheriff King Family Support Centre Crisis Line . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-0707 Awo-taan Native Women’s Shelter Society . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-531-1972 Wheatland Communities Crisis Society Shelter. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-934-6634 SIDS Calgary Offers support to families who have lost a child to crib death . . . . 403-265-7437

Generations of Hope (GOH) GOH was conceived in 2005 as an initiative of the CRFP in Calgary. The objective of the fund is to help patients of the program who are facing both fertility and ﬁnancial challenges. From 2005 to 2019, 225 babies have been born to 180 recipients of GOH and 30 cancer patients have received ﬁnancial assistance with fertility preservation. For more information, visit gensofhope.com. Images of Hope (IOH) The fund’s main fundraiser is the Images of Hope (IOH) Gala, being held on May 2 at 6pm at Hudson Event Complex in downtown Calgary. IOH is an annual upscale fundraising event and exhibition featuring photographs of and stories about IVF-conceived children and their families. “The funds we raise help families with the costs of IVF and other reproductive technologies, putting the hope of having children closer to reality,” says GOH President Alex MacNab.

West Central Communities Resource Centre One-stop approach for family services in the SW communities in regards to early intervention . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-543-0555 Women’s Health Resources Women’s Health Centre. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-944-2270 YWCA Sheriff King Family Support Centre Non-crisis information - 8 am to 4 pm . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-266-4111

Hospitals Alberta Children’s Hospital 2888 Shaganappi Trail NW . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-955-7211 Foothills Medical Centre 1403, 29 Street NW . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-944-1110 Peter Lougheed Centre 3500, 26 Avenue NE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-943-4555 Rockyview General Hospital 7007, 14 Street SW. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-943-3000 Sheldon M. Chumir Health Centre - Urgent Care 1213, 4 Street SW . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-955-6200 South Calgary Health Centre - Urgent Care 31 Sunpark Plaza SE. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-943-9300

To purchase your tickets to the gala or to donate to the cause, visit imagesofhopegala.ca. CCM Photo: Laurel Halladay and her twin boys; photo courtesy of Orange Glow Photography.

South Health Campus - Emergency Department 4448 Front Street SE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 403-956-1111

parent connection

how to build your village Parenting can be heartbreakingly isolating - create connections. By Stacie Gaetz

eeling like you are the only person who is awake in the world as you pace the floor all night with a sick baby in your arms? Hiding in your dark pantry to cry alone after yelling at your kids because they’ve been bickering at each other for hours? Feeling completely defeated and inadequate because your toddler violently refuses to eat every meal you’ve put in front of them? Wondering if you are the only one who has to repeat themselves 3,457 times to get your teenager to complete one simple task? In all of this uncertainty, one thing is for sure: parenting can be isolating. It’s ironic that bringing tiny people into the world whom you love more than anything can make you feel more alone than you have ever felt before. Dr. Soraya Lakhani, registered psychologist and director of Yellow Kite Child Psychology, says parenting can feel isolating for a number of reasons. “As parents carve out time to raise their children, they have to redistribute time and energy from other parts of their lives,” she says. “This redistribution can result in parents having to suspend some of their own needs, including spending time with existing friends, making new friends, and engaging in activities that might bring them a sense of happiness, relaxation, and connectedness.” “When people are overwhelmed and need support but feel a sense of shame in asking for help, that can lead to a sense of isolation. All parents struggle, yet many parents go through that experience feeling utterly alone, which is really quite heartbreaking,” she says. If you are in a relationship, you can always talk to your significant other, but chances are they are just as lost as you are. Your circle of friends can be a great resource but the fact that people are having children later in life may mean you are either the first or last person in your group to have kids. Your parents have been in your shoes before but that was decades ago, and life has changed so much since then. You can’t bother your doctor with every little question either. When you are faced with a parenting dilemma that you don’t know how to solve (something that often happens multiple times a day), it is difficult to know whom to reach out to. It takes a village As cliché as it sounds, there is a reason the African proverb, “It takes a village to raise a child,” is so common - it’s true. Chelsea Flemons found this out the hard way when she moved from Calgary to Fort McMurray for her husband’s job just over a year ago. The mother of two girls, ages five and two, says she didn’t know anyone in her new city and she felt terrified, lonely, and sad at the prospect of moving somewhere with no support system. “But I had my girls and we were able to get out there and meet people together,” she adds. “It’s really amazing how quickly it happens if you just put yourself out there a bit. I am the type of person that needs to get out and do things, so I knew if I didn’t make the effort, those negative feelings wouldn’t change.” It’s healthy for parents to be reminded that nobody has all of the answers and it is okay to feel lost and need support. “Having connections with other people in similar contexts can provide a sense of community,” says Lakhani. “At the very least, it helps parents recognize that they aren’t alone. And, of course, it can be a valuable forum for parents to exchange ideas, obtain resources, and discuss avenues they can pursue if they need support.” You might be thinking, ‘That’s all well and good, but how exactly do I do that?’ Finding your parenting pack can be difficult and even awkward. It’s often compared to dating in that when you meet a new parent, you need to get to know them to learn if they are ‘your people’ - if you share the same interests, values, parenting styles, etc. “As with all relationships, when breaking the ice, be open to making the first move when initiating conversation with another parent,” advises Lakhani. “Compliments

are great, as are questions. For example: ‘I love your kid’s XYZ’ and, ‘Where did you get your child’s XYZ?’ The parenting experience can be hugely varied, but there are a lot of universals as well, and talking to another person who understands the joys and challenges of parenting already offers tremendous common ground.” Dad dilemma Finding other parents to connect with can be especially challenging for dads as there are many welladvertised mom groups designed to bring women together to chat about their kids but not as many for fathers. “Being a stay-at-home dad is absolutely isolating,” says Michael Radziwon, a father of three girls, ages 11 and two six-year-old twins. “When there is a group of moms at school pick-up, I’m often ignored. I feel like my opinion is not needed or wanted.” He adds that he has received the same treatment when bringing his children to doctor’s appointments or parent/teacher interviews. “They seem to look right through me and talk to my wife, like I wouldn’t know the answers,” he says. “I’m the one who’s there every day. A parent is a parent, it doesn’t matter if they are male or female.” He says connecting with other parents is made even harder by the fact that it can be awkward for a man to ask a mother for her phone number to connect for a kids’ play date. “There shouldn’t be that stigma, we need to grow more as a society,” he adds. Lakhani says it is harder for dads since many parentchild activities are still catered toward and attended by mothers, especially in the months immediately after birth. “We tend to pursue relationships with people we perceive to be similar to us,” she says. “Two moms might feel like there’s a more natural connection than a mom and dad. I’d still encourage dads to try out the strategies I mentioned. Hopefully there are more opportunities for dads to connect, especially as kids approach school-age.”

Lakhani says the advances in technology meant to bring people together are great and any sort of social connection, no matter how it is fostered, is better than no connection. “Parents know themselves best and can approach forming connections in the way that works best for them,” she says. “Parents should set themselves up for success and make formulating connections as easy as possible, in whatever way feels most natural and rewarding for them.” Radziwon says he has tried using Facebook groups to connect with other dads but has never found the right fit. He has built some relationships through an organization called Ups & Downs Calgary that provides support for individuals with Down syndrome and their parents. “My eldest daughter has Down syndrome and Ups & Downs has really helped us with support and activities for her as well as connecting us to parents going through the same things as we are,” he says. “We’ve created a tight group of friends and we spend time together and learn from each other.” In-person parenting If creating connections through social media and apps isn’t your thing, there is no shortage of organized face-to-face options. Activities include programs offered at local libraries, yoga, swimming lessons, music classes, gymnastics, dance classes, etc. More organic connections can be made at the playground, while picking your child up from school, at local indoor play places and other outings where you might run into another parent with similar interests who lives near you. No matter how you find them, building parenting connections couldn’t be more important. “Feeling alone, overwhelmed, and isolated can take a significant toll on a parent’s physical, emotional, and mental health,” says Lakhani. “It can result in parents feeling burnt out and like they don’t have the bandwidth

“Finding your parenting pack can be diﬃcult and even awkward. It’s often compared to dating in that when you meet a new parent, you need to get to know them to learn if they are ‘your people’ - if you share the same interests, values, parenting styles, etc.”

Togetherness through technology As in Flemons’ case, many people turn to social media to create parenting connections. “My very ﬁrst step to making these connections was joining ‘The Mommy Network’ on Facebook in Fort McMurray,” she says. “I simply posted that I am new here. I just moved from Calgary. I have two girls, ages four and 10 months” - at the time - “and would love to meet some new friends!” The response was overwhelming. I had moms asking to meet up for play dates all over the place. So that’s what we did! With some of them, we connected instantly and have become very close since. I would consider them some of my best friends.” Technology has kept up with this trend of moms turning to their phones and computers to connect. Mush and Peanut are two relatively new apps that are designed to be the ‘Tinder for moms’ to help lonely female parents connect with matches who live nearby. Peanut advertises as “the social network for women to connect across fertility and motherhood, build friendships, ﬁnd support, and learn from one another,” while Mush is marketed as “the friendliest app for mums.”

to live life the way they want to. When parents are burnt out, it can impact their capacity to connect with their children and spouse. A lack of social connectedness can really reinforce the sense of being completely and utterly alone in navigating the parenting journey, and that can leave parents feeling taxed and exhausted, and with nowhere to go to unload or recharge.” Lakhani adds it is important to remember that not all connections are going to work out and that’s perfectly fine. “In truth, by the time we reach adulthood and have kids, many of us are out of practice with making new friends - we haven’t had to do it in a very long time. So, it’s healthy to remember that we might get brushed off or shut down or have connections fizzle out, and that can be discouraging, but it’s also a normal part of seeking out meaningful friendships. It won’t always be a smashing success and just because someone doesn’t want to be close friends doesn't mean there’s something wrong with us or that we’re ridiculous for trying,” she says. Stacie is a freelance writer and editor and mother of a delightful daughter, five, and silly son, two. CCM

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 37

parent connection

how to make a ﬁve senses stress-busting kit for your kids Help teach your little ones self-soothing strategies. By Sandi Schwartz

ave you ever been on the way to the pediatrician’s office when you happened to mention to your kids that it’s time for their annual flu shot? Then all chaos breaks out - they start shaking, screaming, crying, and begging that you turn around and take them home right away. Children may face situations on the go that cause them great anxiety: It may be a trip to the doctor, the first day of school, a challenging test, traveling on an airplane, or going to an unfamiliar place, like a friend’s party or relative’s house. How can you help your kids get through these stressful times, so they can learn to calm themselves down? One helpful technique in addressing anxiety is distraction. If you can interrupt the ruminations and overwhelming fear, then your children can get back to a calmer, more balanced state of mind. You can teach your kids how to do this by using mindfulness,

“A commonly-used mindfulness tactic is to have tools that trigger all of our five senses.” to be fully present in the moment. Mindfulness allows children to better understand their mind-body connection, and stop being reactive to thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations no matter what is happening in their environment. A commonly-used mindfulness tactic is to have tools that trigger all of our five senses. To make it easy for you to arm your kids with tools to calm down when they get panicky, consider putting together a five senses stressbusting kit based on these ideas: 1. Touch. Feeling different textures can be an effective distraction tool. One trick is to have your child touch and feel one texture at a time. Have them tell themselves what it feels like. This way, their full attention is on what they are touching. It is helpful to have several different types of textures to rotate through, such as smooth, rough, slimy, squishy, fuzzy, and hard items. • Touch-and-feel books, like Pat the Bunny • Touch-and-feel cards • Stress balls Buy a sensory toy kit or put together your own bag of items with multiple textures like a tissue, sandpaper, a cotton ball, squishy ball, and a piece of felt.

An inspiring choral experience for young people aged 3-24 (Kodaly-based) • Touring opportunities • No experience necessary Marni Strome, Artistic Director Contact: Linda White 403.210.3499 ljwhite_ca@yahoo.ca

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2. Sight. The sense of sight offers many possibilities for relaxation. Here are a few ideas for your stress-busting kit that are easily accessible on the go: Q Mindful coloring books. Creative activities, like coloring, have been scientifically proven to reduce stress levels because we become so focused on what we are doing when we reach a state of ‘flow’ that we forget what is going on around us. You children can use any type of coloring book, but mandalas are very popular in the mindfulness world. You can easily bring along a coloring book and a pack of crayons or markers. Q Nature imagery. Amazingly, just looking at pictures of nature scenes can reduce stress because our parasympathetic nervous system (which helps us to calm down) is activated. Bring along a packet of national park postcards or a nature-themed picture book. Q Kaleidoscope. Looking at colorful, mesmerizing patterns can grab anyone’s attention for minutes on end and is another wonderful way for children to get lost in the moment. 3. Taste. Mindful eating is another popular relaxation technique. It is a good idea to be prepared with a couple of items of healthy snacks or fruits and veggies that your kids can use to focus on the taste. Teach them how to use mindful eating to direct their attention to the flavors in their mouth.

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4. Sound. Music helps take your attention from fear to something pleasurable. It is a healthy distraction, allows you to be mindful, and forces your brain to shift the thinking process. Consider putting together a special playlist for your kids to listen to when they are stressed. Although slow, quiet classical music is known to have calming effects like lowering pulse and heart rate, reducing blood pressure, and decreasing the levels of stress hormones in the body, it is a personal choice to discover which music you ﬁnd most soothing. Upbeat songs about happiness may work for some while soothing nature sounds may work for others. 5. Smell. As the old adage “stop and smell the roses” reminds us, fragrances can help you to relax and be in the moment. There is no scent more relaxing than lavender. The antioxidant components of lavender can lower the level of stress hormones in the body. There are a number of methods to use lavender to soothe stress and anxiety. Here a few that you can throw in your stress-busting kit: • Lavender spray • Lavender lotion for kids Sandi is a freelance writer/blogger and mother of two. She has written extensively about parenting, wellness, and environmental issues. Find her at happysciencemom.com and sandischwartz. com. Get her free course on raising happy, balanced kids at bit.ly/2i53TDV. CCM

all the feels Helping children identify and manage emotions. By Jan Pierce, M.Ed.

back a situation you’ve observed when out in public. You might say, “Did you see what happened when that little boy cried at the park today? He wanted a turn on the slide, but the bigger boy wouldn’t let him. How do you think that made that little boy feel?” At that point, you may have to help your child identify the feeling such as anger, frustration, or scared. Then ask your child, “What could that little boy have done besides cry? Could he have asked a grown-up for help? Waited longer for a turn? Gone to play on another piece of equipment?”

“Managing emotions is a big task and learning to manage emotions can’t be learned in a day.”

Use simple cues. Some parents ﬁnd that using simple cues such as “take a breath” or “slow down” help their child to self-manage strong emotions (this may take some role-playing to master before your child is able to apply this strategy in the midst of a tough situation). Your child may learn to take a self-imposed timeout to gain composure and cope with a challenging situation. Participating in a soothing activity, such as water play, can help your child de-stress and calm down. Ultimately, you want to understand what caused any given emotion. What is your child feeling and what do they need? Is your child overtired and needs a nap, or is there an ongoing frustration that needs to be addressed? “You’re feeling like your older brother gets to do all of the fun activities. What can I plan especially for you?” Be proactive. Wise parents create teachable moments throughout the day. They notice behaviors and give praise when good things happen. They verbalize their own feelings to help their children understand the wide range of feelings that humans experience. They might say, “Wow, you really showed a lot of patience with Robby today when he said mean words to you.” Or, “I’m so excited that you have your ball game after school. I can’t wait to watch you play.” You can also use read-aloud times to notice the emotions shown by characters in your child’s favorite books. “Hmm, I wonder how Cinderella was feeling when the step-sisters wouldn’t let her go to the ball.” Make it a family practice to show kindness to others and serve in practical ways: “Let’s take some cookies over to Mrs. Adams. She gets lonely sometimes.” Or model being grateful: “I am so thankful for our home. We have a nice place to live in and be a family.” Managing emotions is a big task and learning to manage emotions can’t be learned in a day. It takes practice to identify the feelings that are inside of us, and there are many opportunities to make good decisions to express those feelings in appropriate ways. You have the chance to make your home and family life a training-ground for raising kind, compassionate children who care about others and who can own their feelings in positive ways. You can help your kids with ’all the feels.’

Jan Pierce, M.Ed., taught elementary school for over 30 years. She is the author of Homegrown Readers and Homegrown Family Fun. Find her at janpierce.net. CCM

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 39

parent connection

e’ve all been there: Your three-year-old has a meltdown in the middle of the grocery checkout line or you become beyond exasperated when your eldest clobbers your youngest for no apparent reason. Feelings. They push us to our limits. They’re big and at times, seem to come out of nowhere. We realize that we have difficulty managing our own emotions, so it’s easy to understand when our children have the same problem. Here are some strategies to help your children first identify their feelings, and then learn to manage their feelings in acceptable ways. Name the emotions. It can be difficult for young children to understand what happens when they explode with emotions. They may not have the language to identify their feelings, they only know their feelings are big and have overcome them. In daily life, it’s helpful to clearly name feelings as they arise. For example, you can say to your child, “I see that it makes you angry when your brother knocks down your block tower.” Another strategy is to find a simple feeling chart with visuals to help your children when they’re feeling happy, excited, sad, or angry. (Look online to find a free printable chart.) Then you can periodically ask your child, “How are you feeling? Show me on the feeling chart.” Model expressing your feelings appropriately. Make it a habit to tell your children how you’re feeling. Model appropriate ways to express that you’re upset or frustrated. You might say to your child, “I’m feeling sad that it’s time to go to school and you aren’t dressed yet.” Or, “It makes me very happy when you eat all of your breakfast.” When everyone in your family has had a bad day, acknowledge and express your own part of the problem: “Mommy got very frustrated today and became angry. I’m sorry I raised my voice at you. Let’s have a better day tomorrow.” Children will be quick to forgive you when you’re honest about your less-thanperfect day. They’ll learn that managing emotions is a human problem. Replay a situation. Sometimes it helps to replay a situation that went wrong to untangle and name the emotions involved. For instance, “It was time to brush your teeth, but you didn’t come when I asked you to, and then we both lost our tempers” or, “When Julie took your toy, you became angry and you hit her. We don’t hit each other in our house, so what could you have done differently?” You can also take the opportunity to play

parent connection

6 things your teen needs

but doesn’t know how to ask for Helping them manage those big changes. By Rebecca Hastings

y daughter’s eyes were filled with tears and my voice was louder than needed. We were arguing over something trivial - or so I thought. We were going ‘round and ‘round about the homework she was struggling with. She was convinced she wouldn’t be able to do it, and I was confident she could do it if she pushed through. It was a moment when I could see her potential more than she could. She felt like she was sinking, and all I saw was her refusal to stand up in the shallow water. After going ‘round and ‘round, we were both exasperated. Heels dug in tight, I realized I needed to be the one to move first. All I could think was to ask her a question: “What do you need?” I pleaded. “I don’t know, mom.” And then the tears came. In that moment, I knew she had no idea what she needed, and it was my job to figure it out with her. This wasn’t about helping her with homework; this was about helping her find her way. Often, teens don’t know what they need. Most kids don’t, but when they’re young, we step in more willingly. Now that our babies are more at eye-level, we look at them expecting them to make adult choices, forgetting that sometimes they don’t know how to figure things out on their own. Here are six things your teen may not have a clue that they need: 1. Physical touch. As our kids get older, we are less likely to hug them, snuggle with them, or give them physical reassurance. This is especially true with boys because of societal gender expectations. While much research has been done on the effects of physical contact for babies and young children, we forget that some of the same benefits apply to teens. As per the Parenting For Brain online article, “Hugging - 7 Benefits for You And Your Child (Backed by Science), “Hugging triggers the release of the feel-good hormone, oxytocin, that can lower the level of stress hormone and counter its anxiety effects.” This dual benefit helps teens in a way they cannot verbalize, making the situation they are facing easier to handle. When my daughter is spiraling down emotionally, and I gently pull her into a hug, she immediately collapses against me, letting the burden leave her as she falls into me. For some, hugs may be too much, but other types of physical touch can benefit teens. A hand on the shoulder

or a few minutes sitting side by side is enough to bring the same benefits as hugging. 2. Sleep and rest. The need for and benefits of sleep for teens has been highlighted recently with studies showing that teens are not getting enough sleep for proper development. While much of the recent research has focused on the sleep/school connection for teens, there is far more need concerning adequate rest. Thinking back to those crazy years when I had three kids in as many years, everything was a blur. I spent five years sleep deprived, and as a person who doesn’t function well without eight hours of sleep, some days were difficult. I was irritable, unable to solve problems, and couldn’t think clearly. Now, think of those same effects on the physically and emotionally developing teen brain. I don’t need a study to confirm that my kids function better with good sleep. This can feel tricky with teens as changing physiology, more homework, and seeking independence keeps them up late. Shifting the focus from sleep time to rest time has helped in my household. Encouraging your kids to get stressful tasks requiring a lot of thinking done earlier in the evening allows them to use later times for unwinding. And research is clear that the use of electronic devices late at night is not good for anyone. Finding things to do that are relaxing, like taking a shower or bath, reading, listening to audiobooks, journaling, drawing, or doing other non-stressful, quiet tasks are great ways to ease into a better sleep routine. 3. Expression. Often, teens struggle with appropriate ways to express their feelings. At times, their feelings are new and foreign or mixed up in a way that leaves them uncertain as to what they feel. Giving them ideas for ways to express themselves helps. And the best way to do that is by modeling. It’s no secret that telling a teen to do something doesn’t always work, but if they see people they love and trust doing something, they may give it a try. Modeling a variety of ways to express thoughts, ideas, and feelings will help them see they have many options. Much like a buffet, when they are presented with an assortment of possibilities, they may try a few until they find what they like. Talking is the most obvious way we express ourselves, but there are many other possibilities. Writing, drawing, creating, cooking, and building are a few ways to foster expression. Some need something more physical so things like running, hiking, and swimming can help. The key is to try many things and be okay when they don’t work. When teens see you finding your way, even with struggles, it helps them know there is nothing wrong or unusual with their own struggles. 4. Exercise. Very similar to expressing your feelings, exercise presents positive benefits that are often overlooked because we don’t know how to incorporate it in our lives. Teens especially struggle with this, even teens that play sports. While playing a sport is a physical activity that will benefit them, it can also become a responsibility or burden associated with pressure. I admit, I don’t love exercise, but I try to walk or hike regularly. It has little to do with physical health benefits and more to do with clarity and mental well-being. Much study has been done on the benefits of exercise. According to an article on HelpGuide, “The Mental Benefits of Exercising,” it is proven that people who

exercise “feel more energetic throughout the day, sleep better at night, have sharper memories, and feel more relaxed and positive about themselves and their lives.” All of these benefits will help teens in ways they often cannot pinpoint. Giving them ample opportunity to try different types of exercise will also help them develop habits that will serve them later in life. Even if they groan and complain, drag the family out for a hike or take them to the pool. Head to the park, shoot hoops, or challenge your teen to a 5K. Teens tend to let exercise go in a time when they need it most. You can make sure they still have the opportunity to get moving (plus, they may love the chance to beat you in a marathon). 5. Listen. This tip is the one most parents roll their eyes at and brush past. We often find ourselves in the ‘my-kid-never-tells-me-anything’ camp or the ‘my-kidnever-stops-talking’ camp: neither of which sounds very fun. We are often surprised to learn that our teen wants better communication with us, but sometimes we lack the time, interest, or skills necessary to effectively listen to our teen. Listening is not always easy, and sometimes the results may not be noticeable, but fostering an environment of caring about what your teen has to say is helpful. 6. Grace. This idea is one you won’t find many places, but I have found it to be one of the most important things to teach my teen. Today’s teens are growing up in a high-pressure society. Final exams, post-secondary education, grad school, finding a high paying job all feel like necessities to make it in this great big busy world. Sometimes teens are so busy trying to be the best and to get ready for the next step that they become miserable. Simple reminders and parent behavior make a big difference here. If the only things we ask about school have to do with their grades, sports, and post-secondary applications, we are showing our kids that those are the most important things in life. When they lose a game or get a low grade, it suddenly becomes devastating, but we have the power to change that. One day, my daughter came home upset about her math quiz grade. She was crying because she wanted it to be higher, to be better, to be perfect. After listening to her talk for a few minutes, I asked one question: “Do you know what I got on my math quiz in seventh grade?” She looked at me with wide eyes, eager to see how we measured up against one another. “No,” she replied to me. “Neither do I.” She may have rolled her eyes when I said this, but it showed her that it’s okay to let things go sometimes. We need to give ourselves grace when we make mistakes because it enables us to learn from our mistakes and move forward without anger or bitterness. Look for ways you can teach your teen about grace; it may mean the difference between a stressful meltdown and a small bump in the road. And one final note, this idea of grace works for you, too. As parents, we want so much to get it right, but the truth is, sometimes we will miss the mark. Give yourself grace in those moments and move forward. It’s worth it. Rebecca is a former teacher who is passionate about authenticity, faith, and family. She writes regularly at myinkdance.com, has been featured on sites such as The Washington Post and Scary Mommy, and her books are available to purchase on Amazon. CCM

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10 easy steps with great results. By Jill Morgenstern

hether itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;mama,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;dada,â&#x20AC;? or â&#x20AC;&#x153;uh-oh!â&#x20AC;? everyone gets excited about babyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ rst word! But what about the words that come afterward? Building a childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vocabulary is never quite as exciting as those ďŹ rst words, but it is no less important. Children start by building their receptive language, the language they hear and understand. Their expressive language refers to the language they can produce. Both are important not only for the ability to communicate but for academic success, as well. Having a great vocabulary is the ďŹ rst step in literacy and can give them many essential tools. Perhaps most importantly for school success, a more developed expressive and particularly receptive language ability will increase childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ability to comprehend the texts they read. According to speech pathologist Martha Meyers, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The formula for reading comprehension is receptive language times decoding skills. The greater the base of receptive language they have, the better their comprehension skills. And reading comprehension is needed for all aspects of academic education.â&#x20AC;? Below are steps you can take to increase your childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s expressive and receptive language:

would repeat, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh! You went to the store?â&#x20AC;? This gives the child the needed information without making them feel bad about making a mistake. 8. Narrate as you go. Talk aloud about what your child is doing. As your child plays, narrate as if you were at a sporting event. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You put four wheels on your Lego car!â&#x20AC;? This not only helps build your childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s receptive language but can help build self-esteem as your child hears that you ďŹ nd their activities interesting and meaningful. 9. Add to what your child already says. Expand on what your child already knows by adding words to their sentences. If your child points and declares â&#x20AC;&#x153;kitty,â&#x20AC;? you could add, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The kitty is soft and furry!â&#x20AC;? 10. Turn down the background noise. A study from 2016 suggests that background noise may hinder childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ability to learn new words. If the TV or radio or podcasts is a constant in your household, it may be worth turning it down or off to help your childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s language development. If you have concerns about your childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s speech, asking the teacher is always a great way to gain a fresh

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Many of these ideas will become habit, if used frequently, and will help your child both communicate more eďŹ&#x20AC;ectively and increase school success with little extra eďŹ&#x20AC;ort on your part.â&#x20AC;? 1. Ask questions and give your child time to respond. Giving children ample time to respond to your questions allows them time to independently choose the proper vocabulary. 2. Treat the youngest child as a potential conversationalist. By giving children a turn to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;talk,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; even an infant begins to understand the conventions of conversation. Your child can begin to understand that people take turns during a conversation and that questions generate an answer before your child becomes an active participant. 3. Make errands a time to learn. As you do your daily errands, it is easy to take the opportunity to develop oral language. Discuss purchases to your child as you place items in the basket. Statements and questions such as, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have this chicken breast for dinner tonightâ&#x20AC;? or, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Did you notice how fresh the broccoli looks today?â&#x20AC;? introduce new vocabulary to your child. 4. Sing as you go about your day. Children can learn a lot of language from music. Sing your way to the tub during bath time or make a song part of the bedtime routine. As an added bonus, you will often be exposing your children to rhyming, a precursor to reading. 5. Read aloud. New research suggests that reading to children can be more effective than talking to them for building vocabulary. Sometimes, parents will naturally explain the new words they encounter. Other times, children will decipher the meaning from context. Both routes lead children to increased vocabulary. 6. Ask open-ended questions. Rather than asking your child yes or no questions, give them the opportunity to expand their answers. Instead of asking, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Do you want a drink of orange juice?â&#x20AC;? you might try asking, â&#x20AC;&#x153;What would you like to drink?â&#x20AC;? This encourages your child to come up with the word â&#x20AC;&#x153;waterâ&#x20AC;? or â&#x20AC;&#x153;juiceâ&#x20AC;? by themselves. 7. Model rather than correct. When your child mispronounces or uses incorrect grammar, repeat the sentence back using the correct form. For example, if your child says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I goed to the store with daddy,â&#x20AC;? you

perspective. But whether youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re concerned or just wanting to provide enrichment, encourage your childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s language with a little effort and commitment. These easy steps can yield great results. Many of these ideas will become habit, if used frequently, and will help your child both communicate more effectively and increase school success with little extra effort on your part. Freelance writer Jill is a teacher, wife, and mother of four kids. Check out her website, Do Try This at Home, dotrythisathome.net. CCM

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how ‘snowplow’ parenting hurts success Stop clearing the way!

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riving your children to school whenever they miss the bus. Switching soccer teams after a disagreement with the coach. Polishing homework projects and essays. What do these scenarios have in common? They’re examples of ‘snowplow’ parenting, the increasingly common practice of removing obstacles from your child’s path. If you’ve unwittingly adopted a few of these practices, you’re not alone. Per a recent New York Times poll, up to three-quarters of parents admit to snowplow behaviors. From ensuring that a child gets their preferred teacher/locker/class schedule each year to navigating all classroom and playground conflicts, parents who snowplow think they’re clearing the way for achievement. In fact, snowplow parents prevent a child from learning how to solve problems, resolve conflicts, and manage relationships, robbing them of the resourcefulness and resilience that breed success. Sound familiar? Here’s how to turn your snowplow around. Early years: 0 to 5 Small snowplows Parents of teens and young adults aren’t the only ones who snowplow. In younger children, snowplow parenting can look like steering your child away from scenarios that stir strong feelings or going out of your way to prevent any negative experience; say, leaving work to drop off a forgotten homework project so your child has to deal with missing a deadline. But protecting children from all negative experiences - like embarrassment, regret, or frustration - prevents them from learning how to cope when these feelings arise. “Research shows that children who have been overly-protected from their own emotions lack a sense of agency over their own lives and are more prone to develop unfulfilling relationships in the future,” says Kamini Wood, a certified life and resilience coach for girls, teens, and young women. Rather than helping your little one avoid every distressing moment, encourage an ‘I can handle it’ mindset; Laurie Wright’s Mindful Mantras books and audio books offer fast, simple messages that build resilience and emotional regulation.

Elementary years: 6 to 12 Skill-building Strong self-advocacy skills - the ability to stand up for oneself - are important to master, especially for school-age kids. They’ll have plenty of opportunities for practice, from playground politics to homework dramas to sports scufﬂes. When snowplow parents step in to smooth over these conﬂicts before children can resolve them independently, they unwittingly prevent kids from learning to self-advocate, says clinical psychologist and mother of four Michelle P. Maidenberg, Ph.D.

“Parents who snowplow think they’re clearing the way for achievement. In fact, snowplow parents prevent a child from learning how to solve problems, resolve conflicts, and manage relationships.” To effectively walk the line between snowplow parent and strong advocate, ﬁrst ask yourself whether the situation in question puts your child’s physical or emotional safety at risk. When the answer is yes, as with bullying, parents should get involved. If the answer is no - for example, your child doesn’t like their assigned locker partner’s messy habits or a new teacher’s grading policies - the situation calls for parental support, rather than intervention. Helping a frustrated or disappointed child determine how to navigate a situation, then stepping back as they implement the plan, ultimately serves them better than engineering a swift resolution yourself. How 'Snowplow' Parenting Hurts Success – Continued on next page

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Evaluating the costs. By Allison Percival

n Calgary and area, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re fortunate to have a huge variety of summer camp options covering a wide range of ages, interests, skill levels, and budgets. Booking camps can sometimes be overwhelming, and it isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always clear what they offer thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s above and beyond what your regular childcare might provide potentially at a lower price. When youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re making your selections for the summer and weighing your options, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s important to really look at what each camp experience is worth based on their venue, programming, and instruction. Some families will ďŹ nd that several weeks of lower cost, more generalized programming ďŹ ts the bill perfectly, especially at younger ages. Other families will make arrangements for more affordable childcare for most of the summer, saving their budgets for camps with specialist teachers or unique settings which further skill development in areas that canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be replicated at home. Some families have started pioneering â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;stay-at-homeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; camps, developing programming themselves or with a small group of other families. Here are some important questions to guide you while you consider summer programming options: â&#x20AC;˘ Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s your goal? â&#x20AC;˘ Will your child develop a new skill or interest, or will they improve on a skill? â&#x20AC;˘ Will this camp expose your child to various social situations, environments, experiences, or equipment you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have access to at home? â&#x20AC;˘ How many other children will there be at the camp? Are there structured activities to guide socialization? â&#x20AC;˘ Will your child be able to make or do something that requires a special setting? (For example, a full theatrical performance with costumes, lighting, sets, and a cast of actors; a glazed and kiln-ďŹ red piece of pottery; trail riding or horseback riding?) â&#x20AC;˘ Is your child developmentally ready to enjoy all this camp has to offer? Evaluate the cost: â&#x20AC;˘ Is this camp led and/or developed by a specialist instructor who will have knowledge and experience to help your child grow? â&#x20AC;˘ Does this camp feature direct instruction and interaction, or supervised â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;free playâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; only? â&#x20AC;˘ Does this camp give your child the opportunity

to see something working â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;behind the scenes,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; or give them special access to a facility, attraction, or occupation they might not otherwise get to experience? What kinds of materials, supplies, and equipment will be made available to my child as part of this camp? Is there any performance or project-creation component to this camp? Will my child have something to display or take home at the end? Is the camp venue specialized or otherwise unique to the program? How was the camp program developed and why? If considering residential camps, consider the added cost of 24-hour supervision, food, and lodging.

â&#x20AC;˘

â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;˘

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s important to really look at what each camp experience is worth based on their venue, programming, and instruction.â&#x20AC;? Consider the alternative: â&#x20AC;˘ Do you have the time and mental/emotional energy to plan and supervise a full summer of activities for your child? â&#x20AC;˘ Is your child likely to be bored or unproductive at home or in their regular childcare setting? Will your regular childcare arrangements provide â&#x20AC;˘ opportunities for skill and interest development over the summer months? â&#x20AC;˘ Are you willing to provide full-time childcare and activity planning/supervision for other children as part of a babysitting share or camp share arrangement? Do you know other parents who might be interested in this?

â&#x20AC;˘

What are the potential ďŹ nancial costs of art supplies, attractions, and activities to keep your child busy all summer long? If you want your child to meet new friends or gain more social conďŹ dence, how will you facilitate this?

No matter what your time and budget allow, the best summer programming options will be the ones which work for you! Every family, every child, and every situation is different. Have a great summer! Allison is the assistant publisher of Calgaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Child Magazine. CCM How 'Snowplow' Parenting Hurts Success â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Continued from previous page

Teen years: 13 to 18 Machine wars While so-called â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;helicopterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; parents hover and micromanage, snowplow parents take protective parenting a step further by actively removing obstacles to their childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s success. Snowplow parents often shift into high gear during the teen years because the stakes are higher, says Maidenberg. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our parenting is directly impacted by whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going on in our society culturally, politically, socially, and economically,â&#x20AC;? she notes. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s children are facing more volatility with higher youth suicide rates, the opioid and vaping epidemic, and increasing competition to get into university.â&#x20AC;? Well-meaning parents who want to relieve some of this pressure can easily slip into snowplow parenting, says Maidenberg. This starts with innocuous behaviors like becoming their childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s alarm clock, repeatedly reminding them of deadlines and assignments, and using their own connections to land coveted internships or jobs for their offspring. Parents can support success without driving a snowplow, though. Establish a regular weekly check-in with your teen to touch base on homework, test prep, and work responsibilities. Give your teen the tools to stay organized, like a wall calendar, digital reminder app, or a planner. And when problems arise, employ a simple phrase to keep the snowplow at bay. Instead of â&#x20AC;&#x153;What can I do,â&#x20AC;? ask â&#x20AC;&#x153;How can I support you?â&#x20AC;? Malia is a nationally-published health journalist and author of Ready, Set, Sleep: 50 Ways to Help Your Child Sleep So You Can Sleep Too. CCM

Summer h Ä&#x2026;Ä&#x2018;Ä&#x2030; Kids Camps Summer Camps Teen Studios =ĂˇĂˇĂ§Ă&#x201A;Ă°Âş Â¸ĂˇÄ&#x2026; Â¸Ä&#x;Ă° Â&#x192;Ă°ÂŞ ĂŻÂŽÂ&#x192;Ă°Ă&#x201A;Ă°ÂşÂ¸Ä&#x;ĂŠ Â&#x192;Â¤Ä?Ă&#x201A;ÄŞĂ&#x201A;Ä?Ă&#x201A;ÂŽÄ&#x2030; Â¸ĂˇÄ&#x2026; your kids? Enroll them in one of our week-long, ÂżÂ&#x192;Ă°ÂŞÄ&#x2030;ÇşĂˇĂ° Ă&#x201A;Ă°Ä?ÂŽÄ&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â¤Ä?Ă&#x201A;ÄŞÂŽ Â&#x192;Ä&#x2026;Ä&#x2018; Ä&#x201A;Ä&#x2026;ĂˇÂşÄ&#x2026;Â&#x192;ĂŻÄ&#x2030;Ç&#x; tÂŽ Â&#x192;ĂŠÄ&#x2030;Ăˇ ĂˇÂ¸ÂšÂŽÄ&#x2026; Â¸Ä&#x2026;ÂŽÂŽ ÂŁÂŽÂ¸ĂˇÄ&#x2026;ÂŽ Â&#x192;Ă°ÂŞ Â&#x192;Â¸Ä&#x2018;ÂŽÄ&#x2026; Â¤Â&#x192;Ä&#x2026;ÂŽÇ&#x153;

sĂ&#x201A;Ä&#x2030;Ă&#x201A;Ä? h Ä&#x2026;Ä&#x2018;Ä&#x2030;Ç&#x;Â¤Â&#x192;ÇĽÄ&#x2030;Ä&#x;ĂŻĂŻÂŽÄ&#x2026;Â¤Â&#x192;ĂŻÄ&#x201A;Ä&#x2030; to learn more and register today!

hÄ&#x2030;ÂŽ Â¤ĂˇÂŞÂŽ EBKC202011 to Ä&#x2030;Â&#x192;ÄŞÂŽ Č&#x152;Ĺ&#x17E;ĹĄ ÄŤĂ&#x201A;Ä?Âż ĂˇÄ&#x;Ä&#x2026; Â&#x192;Ä&#x2026;ĂŠÄą Ă&#x201A;Ä&#x2026;ÂŞ ]Ä&#x201A;ÂŽÂ¤Ă&#x201A;Â&#x192;ĂŠÇ&#x153; JÂ¸ÂšÂŽÄ&#x2026; ÂŽĂ°ÂŞÄ&#x2030; CÂ&#x192;Ä&#x2026;Â¤Âż Ĺ&#x;Ĺ?Ä&#x2030;Ä?Ç&#x161; Ĺ&#x17E;Ĺ&#x153;Ĺ&#x17E;Ĺ&#x153;

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considering your camp budget

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summer camp planning Plan ahead to avoid chaos. By Nanica Brown

any summers, I would scramble to leave the newsroom by 4pm to pick my kids up from summer camp. Still, I would be one of the last parents in the camp pick-up line. When my kids complained, I wondered how other parents made their summer schedules work. Especially for parents working outside of the home, summer can be absolute chaos. Finding safe, fun activities that won’t break the bank is only half the battle faced when the final school bell rings in June. Most parents also have to factor in multiple children, camp hours, and traffic, which is why I have put together 10 tips for successfully preparing for summer camp season: 1. Plan early for summer camp. Loosely planning out your schedule for the summer in advance will help you pick the camps best suited to your family. Are you taking any vacation time? Is your cousin getting married? Family reunion coming up? Knowing your summer schedule ahead of time will ensure you don’t enrol your child in a five-day camp when you’re only in town for those three days. 2. Summer camps, especially low cost or subsidized, have limited space and fill up quickly. Wondering what camps are available? Check out last year’s Calgary’s Child Summer Camp & Program Guide online at calgaryschild.com and be sure to pick up a hard copy or read online the 2020 Summer Camp & Program Guide, being featured in the upcoming Spring issue. 3. Ask your child what they would like to do. It’s their time and you don’t want to waste your money on a camp they will hate. What activities are they interested in participating in this summer? Do they want to go to camp with a friend? Do they want to go to an overnight camp? These are all important questions to ask early in the process. If your kids are old enough, get them to help you by doing some of the leg work looking for camps that interest them. 4. Do your due diligence. Nowadays, you wouldn’t buy anything without doing a little research and summer camps are no different. A quick search will help you assess the quality of the programs and see if they are in good standing with the city/province you live in.

“If your kids are old enough, get them to help you by doing some of the leg work looking for camps that interest them.” It is also important to ask about the camp instructors before enlisting your child. Do they receive any training? How many kids per instructor? Do they have first-aid certification? In large camps, who do they report to? Remember, these are the people who will be caring for your kids for eight or more hours a day. 5. Do you have a shy child? If a child is shy, it can be hard for them to try something new and even harder if they don’t know anyone. To ease your child’s separation anxiety, see if you can visit the camp before you drop them off for the first time and provide your child with lots of information, such as: • Where the camp is located. What activities they will be doing. • • How long they will be at camp each day. • Pick-up time and who will be picking them up if it’s not you. • Who to call in case of an emergency. 6. Check for extra fees or discounts. Enrolling multiple kids or enrolling in back-to-back camps? You’ve enrolled in the camp but sometimes there are extra activities that a child might want to take part in. Knowing there are extra fees in advance means you won’t be scrambling to find $5 in change on your car floor at drop-off. 7. Dress for success. Is the camp outside, crafty, or does it involve partaking in multiple activities

throughout the day? Camp isn’t the time to pack your child’s new outfit from grandma, their new hydro flask, or the new skateboard sneakers they begged for. At camp, their stuff is going to get lost, dirty, or wrecked. Don’t have anything on hand? Hit up a second-hand show or thrift store and most importantly, label all of their belongings with your child’s last name. Having the right gear can make or break the camping experience for everyone involved. 8. Keep yourself in the loop. You booked a camp in March and checked it off your list, but make sure you also stay up to date on communication. There is nothing worse than finding out on the first day of camp that there were forms you needed to bring in or that camp starts later than they originally told you. Make sure you are signed up for emails and join their social media, so you can stay abreast of any and all new developments. 9. Read the fine print. Signing up for camp comes with reams of paperwork. Camp information, contact information, health care forms, waivers, personality quizzes (just kidding!) - it can feel endless. Carefully read through what you are signing to catch details like additional fees, shortened camp schedules that are out of the ordinary, or extra field trips that your child may want to participate in. 10. Red light - green light. Have you considered the change in your routine? If you are used to going straight to work, how will dropping the kids off impact your schedule? In big cities, summer is construction season - will there be detours or road closures on your route? Do you have multiple kids? Make sure you didn’t sign them up for camps on opposite ends of the city. Is there bussing to and from camp? How long will they be en route to camp each day? While summer traffic is usually lighter, planning ahead will make sure you don’t spend extended time on the road. Happy summer planning and camping!

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Nanica is the proud parent to Benjamin and Fable. Truly a child at heart, she is constantly exploring Calgary for new things to keep her kids from destroying her house and happily occupied year-round. CCM

beneﬁt kids Let them try something new this summer! By Shari Medini

t is difficult to figure out activities for your children: How many activities should you and your children commit to? Which activities will your children enjoy doing? How will these activities benefit your kids? There are many options when it comes to extracurricular activities that it can be hard to choose, but you should always look to your kids and take note of their personal interests to help guide your decisions. You should also try to give your children a variety of experiences, including encouraging them to try various sports! There are a lot of benefits to kids being involved in athletics - regardless of the sport. Sports (when balanced with other activities) give children the opportunity to grow into well-rounded, confident, hardworking adults. Here are many reasons why playing sports can be great for kids: They may love a sport! Many kids are craving an outlet for their abundance of energy. They may fall in love with the idea that they can go someplace and be encouraged to run faster and jump higher! Sports can be an amazing outlet for fun and exercise, and there is a variety to choose from. Let them try different sports and see if there is one they fall in love with. There is a way to be age-appropriate. Involving your kids in sports at a young age does not mean they are going to be taken out of your home and moved across the country to train to be a world-class athlete at five years old. It is up to you to keep tabs on what is reasonable for each child and their personality. It is okay to push your children a little bit. You shouldn’t always shy away from pushing your children when they need a nudge.

like a child’s sports schedule is too much, it probably is. If a child wants to take on a higher commitment to the sport, let them try. Teammates may become family. When sports are an integral part of a child’s life, their teammates may become their best friends. They are able to share the good days and the bad and create connections that may well last into adulthood. When you train side by side with someone for hours each and every week, that bond typically doesn’t just disappear. Are sports for everyone? No. Is it something your kids can at least try and have fun with? Absolutely! Whether they participate in sports for one or 10 years, sports can still teach them valuable life lessons while having fun along the way.

Shari is the co-owner of the parenting website, adorethem.com. Adore Them strives to share positive, practical advice and resources to help you ﬁnd joy in your own parenting journey. CCM

“Involving your kids in sports at a young age does not mean they are going to be taken out of your home and moved across the country to train to be a world-class athlete at five years old.” After all, you encourage your children to read, write, and learn math. You don’t think twice about making your kids go to school every day. Yet when it comes to sports (that can also be valuable to their development), parents tend to shy away from regular sports practice. Signing up for competitive/successful teams has benefits. If your children are going to put in the time and effort, why not make sure they are getting the most out of it? Competitive teams often mean that your children will be surrounded by knowledgeable coaches and motivated peers. They will be able to learn core skills that will benefit them down the road. There are incredible life lessons to be learned. Sports offer an amazing learning experience for life lessons. Kids are able to see the importance of hard work because they see first-hand that the more they practice, the better they get! They are able to understand the value in taking calculated risks (for example, they will never score a goal if they don’t take the shot). They learn how to respect their coaches and be a good teammate. They begin to understand that some days you win, and some days you lose. Doors may open to unique opportunities. If your child falls in love with a sport and commits to it, there Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 45

early-bird camp & program feature

sports

may be some cool opportunities that come their way! For example, traveling to competitions, being part of a unique community, even achieving a school scholarship. Children are able to gain perspective and maturity through the unique experiences that sports provide along the way. What else are they going to be doing with their time? Be honest with yourself. If your children skipped out on sports practice, what would be they doing instead: Watching TV? Bickering? Jumping off your furniture? Wouldn’t you rather them be in the fresh air at soccer practice, running around and learning the value of teamwork? Sports remain important as they grow into teens and put their time and effort into something productive. They won’t be ‘missing out.’ Parents often worry about their kids missing out on their childhood - and rightfully so! You don’t want to turn your children into ‘athlete robots,’ but you can establish balance. Always listen to your gut and take cues from each kid. If it seems

early-bird camp & program feature

choosing the right day camp for your child Trust your instincts. By Christa Melnyk Hines

ay camps come in all shapes and sizes, appealing to a range of interests and ages. Here's how to ﬁnd a camp that invests in your youngster by creating an unforgettable experience where they'll meet new friends, gain self-conﬁdence, and learn new skills - all while giving you peace of mind. Begin with basics. First, determine your schedule needs. Some camps are only a few hours a day while others are structured to work well with a working parent’s schedule. Figure out if you'll need to arrange before- or after-care. From there, seek a camp with “caring staff, fun programs, and a dedication to the health and safety of the campers,” says DD Gass, a director of camps and school-age services for a faith-based community centre. Match the camp with your child’s interests. From computer coding to robotics to sports, day camps offer kids the opportunity to try all kinds of new activities. If your child isn’t interested in a camp that specializes in one activity, choose a more traditional camp that offers a wide range of activities throughout the session. “Make sure there’s a healthy balance between structure and choice,” says Jim Spearin, senior vice president of Youth Development for the YMCA. Consider the culture. Ask for referrals from trusted family and friends. “Choose a camp that welcomes parents as partners in their experience,” advises Spearin. “Parents should always feel welcome to come visit during camp. There should be planned activities for both parent and camper to enjoy together, such as special events or campouts.”

Seek qualified, organized staff. Camp employees should be licensed, certified, and trained in sexual/child abuse prevention, first-aid, and CPR. Find out how camp leaders are supervised and how they plan for emergencies including natural disasters, intruders, and other threats. Also consider the childto-staff ratio. Will your child feel lost in a group that’s too big?

Calm butterﬂies. Many youngsters have a hard time adjusting to new situations and people and may feel scared or intimidated. Include them in the process of choosing a camp. Discuss the schedule of activities and what a typical day will look like. “Children can help pack their lunch (if needed) and pack their backpack with the items they’ll need for camp. This helps them know what they have in

“If your child isn’t interested in a camp that specializes in one activity, choose a more traditional camp that oﬀers a wide range of activities throughout the session.” “It’s vitally important for staff to have child development knowledge and experience to ensure that appropriate, engaging, and enriching activities are offered,” says Katrina Ball, a childcare resource and referral director. Try it before you buy. Attend a camp’s Open House or camp expo or camp fair to ﬁnd out what options exist. Some organizations feature their own camp fairs and mini-camps during the Spring for families to try. “As a parent, you know your child best and what program would be best for them. Trust your instincts,” says Ball.

their backpack and know what they will need to bring home,” says Gass. Find out if one of your child’s friends would like to attend the camp with your child. Attending orientations, visiting the camp site, and meeting the staff prior to the beginning of camp can also help reduce any pre-camp jitters. Freelance journalist Christa and her husband are the parents of two happy day campers. Christa’s latest book is Happy, Healthy & Hyperconnected: Raise a Thoughtful Communicator in a Digital World. CCM

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try something different City of Calgary day camps are for everyone

Dana’s inclusion in activities wouldn’t be possible without accommodating camp leaders. According to Cheryl, Dana participates in everything. “They take her out of her wheel chair, set her up on the mats, and sit behind her so she can play circle ball.”

The City’s over 500 day camps are designed for kids of all ages and abilities. Camp leaders create welcoming environments where kids build confidence, make friends and challenge themselves in new ways. After all, trying new things is an important part of growing up.

“Dana is non-verbal, but her body language after camp speaks a million words. She’s just ear-to-ear grin. She is so happy interacting with the other kids. It’s a really positive experience for her.”

She added, “Everyone working and volunteering there is very passionate about the work they do with kids. The interaction and engagement she has with peers her age at camp is priceless.”

For more information about The City’s day camps, visit calgary.ca/daycamps.

ana has loved City of Calgary day camps since she was three. Every spring and winter break, and for all of July, Dana has tried new activities at the Southland Leisure Centre. Cheryl, Dana’s mom, says it’s an amazing experience for her.

Dana has participated in seven half- and full-day day camps, ranging from Explore Sports, and Pirates tes and Princesses to Rec Adventures. In Dana’s full-day camps, kids rotated through differentt activities, crafts and rooms between 9:00 a.m.. and 4:00 p.m. Every City day camp includes some combination of arts, free play and sportss that fit within the overall camp theme. One of Dana’s favourite camp activities is painting. Some of the art Dana’s camp friends have made decorates her bedroom walls. “We always keep some of the art above her bed, and we love it. The artwork says, ‘Dana is awesome. I love Dana.’”

Some of the art Dana’s camp friends made decorates her bedroom walls.

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learning at summer camp Further your child’s education through camp! Provided by Ourkids.net

amp staff just about everywhere and adults raised with the camping experience will tell you summer camp isn’t only about recreation. More than anything, they say camp teaches individuals about life and how to live it well. It’s a unique place to learn. Y Camp director’s viewpoint Summer camp is a place of active learning that occurs on many levels, explains academic and camp owner Stephen Fine. His 2005 PhD thesis examined residential summer camp as a unique learning environment. “Camps are a special place to learn. Kids who find it difficult to learn in another setting will often succeed at camp,” says Fine. “Camp directors will tell you that kids with attention deficit disorders do very well in a camp setting. This is anecdotal, but the sentiments are quite common.” From his research, Fine found that learning at camp occurs in three areas - personal, social, and physical with strong carryover into school studies. Y Personal viewpoint “At camp, children learn they have the capability to do things on their own,” says Fine. Kids at residential camp are responsible for their own space and know that others depend on them to carry out certain duties. “This type of experience starts to change a child’s whole selfconcept and their sense of who they are and what they can do.” Whereas schools applaud good marks, camp acknowledges and rewards a broader range of accomplishments, says Fine. “It creates an environment where every child can feel valued for their contribution. Camp is very fulfilling on a personal level.” Personal growth also comes through being separated from parents and the security of home, adds Fine. “It’s important for kids to be away from their parents and family. It allows them to understand that they can stand on their own two feet.”

Y Social viewpoint “Children meet people at camp they may not come into contact with in their everyday lives. It breaks down barriers that kids often put up between each other. The school cliques don’t operate at camp,” says Fine. Campers come together from different parts of the city, the province, the country or even the world to be part of a supportive community. “At camp, you work as a team. It builds social capital. It teaches you how

to be a good citizen. Camp teaches you how to be successful in life.” Social bonds between campers are often deep and lasting. “Lifelong friendships are made at camp. Supportive networks are created that continue throughout life for some,” says Fine. “Very strong and lasting lessons about how to be a contributing member of a community are made at camp. You can interview people 20 years after they have gone to camp and they will tell you about their experience at camp with great clarity.”

“From his research, Fine found that learning at camp occurs in three areas - personal, social, and physical - with strong carryover into school studies.” Y Physical viewpoint Kids quickly become aware of their physical prowess and their ability to challenge themselves in various ways, says Fine. “Children become strong very quickly. They are moving all day at camp. They are active from the moment they get out of bed.” Whatever physical activity campers are participating in - swimming, horseback riding, rock climbing, or hiking - developing strength and setting and accomplishing physical challenges builds a great deal of conﬁdence, says Fine. “This self-conﬁdence transfers to other areas of a child’s life.” Fine, who is also chair of education and research for the Ontario Camping Association and owner of Hollows Camp, strongly believes campers can transfer what they’ve learned at camp to many other settings now and later. As he sees it, camp offers boundless chances to learn. “Camps can create many curriculum-related learning opportunities, whether it’s earth science, music, theatre, physics, art, or math,” says Fine. “The camp classroom is effective because it is situated learning. What they are learning becomes real for kids and they never forget it.”

Y Educator’s viewpoint “Camp has been one of the most signiﬁcant experiences of my children’s lives,” says Linda Cameron, associate professor in the Curriculum, Teaching and Learning department at the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education. Summer camp shaped the lives of her now-adult children and she sees its powerful potential to affect, in a positive way, the lives of many children. “Camp provides opportunities for children to adapt and grow socially and emotionally. They can learn in a safe and caring environment how to cope with separation and operate successfully without depending on their parents,” says Cameron. Camp was an important microcosm that helped her children learn to be well grounded in the real world. One camp her kids attended included children with special needs. “They learned to live with children who had disabilities and to see everyone as contributing members of the community,” says Cameron. “They learned life skills. They learned to negotiate, compromise, and coexist within a group. Kids can be self-centred. At camp, they are taught to be group-centred.” As an educator, Cameron says she has become increasingly concerned about over-protected and “pushed kids.” As she sees it, children are either overly coddled, with few chances to independently or spontaneously explore their world, or their lives are overly structured and they are rushed from one activity to the next. Children need the chance to interact spontaneously with their peers, so they can develop socially and creatively and learn to problem-solve, she says. Cameron is also concerned that urban kids are far too detached from the wonders of nature. “Children need nature for their health and the development of their senses. Kids today are not developing their senses and, therefore, their perception of sights and sounds and smells.” Residential camp is one way to alleviate this “nature deﬁcit.” At camp, children can discover for themselves the world around them. “Camp can open children’s eyes and give them different experiences beyond their day-today lives,” she says. “It can help them ask new questions and develop wonderful ideas.”

Trusted by Canadian parents since 1998, Our Kids is your source to the best summer camps, private schools, and extracurriculars. Get the information and feedback you need at ourkids.net. Reprinted with permission by Our Kids, ourkids.net. CCM

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embrace outdoor play Eight ways it raises happy, healthy kids. By Jan Pierce, M.Ed.

o you wonder if your child’s schedule is too crowded? Too stressful? Do you watch your child play video games by the hour and get a little nervous about the long-term effects? Do you wish your child had time to ‘just play’? If you can relate to these situations, you’re in good company. It seems today’s busy lifestyles don’t allow much time for healthy, unstructured outdoor exploration and play. As a culture, our children are paying the price in increased anxiety, poor sleep habits, and a higher degree of difficulty with attention and engagement in learning situations. Kids seem fidgety, easily bored, unable to focus. Take a deep breath. Remember how it used to be when children played freely without a lot of oversight and adult intervention? Can you recall the days when you scraped your knee and just got up and kept playing? When you could sit under a tree and inspect the intricacies of the natural world? When you could dig and build with natural objects? When it seemed there was all the time in the world to just be? Today’s children need these same healthy, authentic play experiences. They need time to explore the out of doors, time to think and dream. Time to wonder and experiment. How to begin? It’s easier than you think. Unplug and send the kids outside. They won’t need an agenda or directions. Once they find themselves in the great outdoors, they’ll do the rest. Here are eight benefits of unstructured, outdoor play. And they’re important: 1. Authentic play. Today’s kids are steeped in a virtual world. They’re adept at computer use, coding, programming and the like, and that’s fine. They need to understand the technological world. But they also need authentic, hands-on experiences that can’t be had in a classroom or computer lab. They need to be grounded in the real world and able to engage in real-life experiences. They need to do real-time observation, exploration, and interaction with the real world. They need the sensory experiences of watching a bird find a worm, of tracking the tiny veins and capillaries on a leaf, of squishing dirt and water together into mud. Kids need to play selfcreated games and make up their own rules apart from

Piano

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adult supervision. They need to learn how to try and fail and try again to make their creations work. 2. Enhanced decision-making. Children need to know how to listen and follow the directions in the classroom and in other activities, such as sports. But they also need the opportunity to play independent of adult oversight. They need to decide to create something or explore something and then make their own plan. They need to cooperate with others to follow the rules to their

own kid-made games. They need the freedom to adapt rules to their current situation and then evaluate whether or not their plan worked. All of these skills are strengthened when kids are allowed to play outside, independently. 3. Active vs. sedentary play. We all know the statistics on the overall health of today’s kids. Too many are overweight and unﬁt. Too many are lethargic and uninspired. In short, many of our kids don’t move

“Kids need to play self-created games and make up their own rules apart from adult supervision. They need to learn how to try and fail and try again to make their creations work.”

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enough to be happy and healthy. But knowing isn’t the same as doing. You need to push through a bit of resistance and insist that your children go outside whether it’s for time in the back yard or access to a larger natural environment. While parks can offer some of the necessary ingredients to healthier play, wilder natural environments such as hiking trails or woodlands are even better. Nothing inspires kids to build forts and create their own games more than an untouched-byman setting. 4. Room for wonder and joy. Watching spiders spin a web. Catching grasshoppers in a jar. Hearing birds sing in the trees and seeing them drop bits of food into the open beaks of their hatchlings. Wandering a beach, picking up beautiful shells or bits of driftwood, smelling the scent of grasses on a warm day. We all need opportunities to absorb the wonder of nature and to experience the joy of being part of the natural world. Give your kids the chance to do these simple things; they’ll beneﬁt immensely. 5. Better classroom performance. Some schools are experimenting with longer recesses and more frequent breaks in their school day and wonder of wonders, every one of them reports better behavior and engagement in the classroom. When kids are given enough time to move and play, they’re better able to focus their attention on classroom work. They feel better, they perform better. It’s not rocket science. In other studies, it’s reported that children who play more outside get a better night’s sleep. A well-rested child is better able to focus attention and ‘get into’ lessons in class. Children who get enough chances for active play feel more content and happier. Happier kids have lower levels of stress, which produces better classroom performance. 6. Self-reliance through exploration. We like it when our children are able to follow directions - when they’re ‘coachable’ - that is an important skill. But it’s also important for kids to learn how to operate via their own internal rules and understandings. Children beneﬁt when they’re able to manage their own behaviors based on their convictions, when they can create a plan and follow

through. When they can try and fail and try again to accomplish a task. All of these skills can only be practiced when kids have the chance to engage in unstructured play free of adult supervision and oversight. It may be hard to break the pattern of over-managing our kids’ lives, but it’s vital that we do so. 7. Improved social skills and interaction. If you’ve ever watched a group of kids play a game of softball, you might see more arguing about the rules than actual play. But what you’re seeing is social skills in the making. Older kids will make the rules and try to enforce them. Quieter kids will be given chances to play (or not) and bossy kids will try to run the show. In the middle of the chaos, children will learn how the world of rules works and they’ll play a little ball, too. When children are free of adult supervision, they build leadership skills and learn to work as a community. Is it pretty? Not always. But there are always lessons learned. In some of the schools where increased free play has been introduced with fewer rules and the attitude of ‘safe enough,’ the children earlier seen as bullies have emerged as leaders. Why? Because they’ve been successful in more active, hands-on play and have been given the chance to expend pent-up energy in all-out activity. 8. Improved mental health. The rise in mental health problems amongst kids as young as pre-school is a testament to our over-managed, over-tested, and earlierto-learn environment. The skills that used to be taught in ﬁrst grade must now be mastered in Kindergarten. The results are children with a too-hurried and too-stressful world. There will always be expectations in the learning world, but for those children who enjoy more free time, more authentic outdoor fun, and more opportunity to run and play, the better they’ll feel about themselves and their life. We give our children a great gift when we encourage and champion free play in the great out of doors. Jan Pierce, M.Ed., is a retired teacher and the author of Homegrown Readers and Homegrown Family Fun. Find her at janpierce.net. CCM

Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 51

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have a STEAM-powered summer By Jonathan Love

ow will your kids tell their story? You know, the one that answers the question, “What did you do last summer?” For many, the summer’s highlights involve the heroic deeds, memorable triumphs, and imaginative fun that only summer camp can provide. Camps are multi-purposed. As well as providing child-care solutions for families during the summer weeks, camp also offers exposure to other facets of life not offered in a school environment. Many parents are familiar with STEM; an acronym for Science, Technology, Engineering and Math. This buzzworthy term is used by practically-skilled curriculumbuilders focused on school-based learning. With an additional ‘A’ for ‘Arts,’ STEM becomes STEAM, which adds a whole new world of imagination and adventure to camp programming. Let’s face it, we’re living in a society where typically the support of arts programming in schools is dwindling, yet the importance of this type of exploration on brain development in children remains imperative. Karen Youngberg, Community Engagement Specialist at Jube School and Jube Camp, says, “Camps offer a few important learnings for a child’s development - the chance to explore new things, create for themselves, and grow some independence.” She adds, “With each positive camp experience, children grow new perspectives, self-conﬁdence, and a sense of community through creative play.” A study at the New York Centre for Arts Education shares its list of beneﬁts of art education on mental development, including gaining the abilities to “observe,

that summer, the improv games that brought the group closer, and the immersive stories that were told around the campfire. It’s these elements of creative play that set the stage for unforgettable experiences. At present, you are likely making the decision of which camps to register your kids in and your decision is likely guided by your family’s summer schedule and hints of interest from your kids. It’s important to listen to their interests because, like planting a seed, these interests will grow. People tend to make friends through shared interests, so it makes sense that a child’s camp friends will continue to flourish due to their shared passion for cycling, acting, or craft-making, for example. “It’s amazing what creative things kids come up with when they’re given the right tools, encouragement, and room to explore through arts education,” adds Youngberg. The arts build confidence. Since there is no ‘right’ way to make art, every child can take pride in what they’ve created and how they got there. This can be an empowering way to learn. So, when it comes to choosing camps for your kids, use your imagination! Because they certainly will. How will your kids tell their summer story? Creatively, with STEAM-powered memories.

describe, analyze, and interpret.” It goes on to note the skillsets of “problem-solving, critical thinking, and language skills and the ability to express feelings with or without words.” In short, arts-based learning opens minds. With the exploration of nature, activities, and the arts, children learn about the world around them and what their role is in it.

“With an additional ‘A’ for ‘Arts,’ STEM becomes STEAM, which adds a whole new world of imagination and adventure to camp programming.” Chances are your own camp memories as a child are of victorious hikes, epic campﬁres, and the quirky characters you accomplished these tasks with. Digging deeper, the memories themselves may be anchored in the self-designed t-shirts and bracelets you wore the rest of

EXPLORE

Jonathan is the Executive Director of the Alberta Jubilee Auditoria Society. For more information on Southern Alberta Jubilee Auditorium’s Jube Camp, which explores the technical, visual, and performing arts, visit jubileeauditorium.com. CCM

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how to get your preschooler excited for day camp Let them know what to expect. By Cheryl Maguire ”Who’s excited about camp?” My twin toddlers looked up at me with a perplexed expression on their faces. They had no idea what I was talking about. Since they were already signed up for day camp, I wanted to make sure they had fun. Here’s how I got them excited about their ﬁrst day at camp. Go to the library. Go to your local library with your aspiring camper and check out every video and picture book regarding the topic. You can also look on YouTube for camp videos or songs or stream the videos online through your library. The idea behind this is to create excitement and to help them understand what to expect. If applicable, you can also talk to your kids about your own camp experiences. Hit the stores. With the camp list in hand, me and my twins went to a mall and shopped for the camp items. They loved picking out their favorite towel, bathing suit, and sunglasses. I even let them buy a new backpack just for camp. While we shopped, we discussed the different activities they would participate in at camp, like swimming and sports. Learn about friendship. When you are at home playing games like Candyland with your kid, talk about things like taking turns and how to have conversations with new kids. You can ask your kid questions like, “What are some things you can talk about at camp with kids your age?” Or ask, “What are some ways to make new friends?” Read books or watch movies with your child about friendship.

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Play camp games. Play some camp games at home to get your child excited and prepared for day camp. For example, one common camp game is mini Olympics. Set up different types of races, like relay races. Another suggestion is to create a scavenger hunt with camprelated items like a backpack, ﬂashlight, sunglasses, etc. After the scavenger hunt, cook up some yummy s’mores or kid-friendly camp food favorites.

“Play some camp games at home to get your child excited and prepared for day camp.” Schedule a visit. Most camps will offer an Open House or an orientation to help your child understand what camp will be like. This is the perfect time for your kid to ask the camp questions and to meet the camp counselors and/or other campers. If possible, before camp starts, set up a playdate with some of the other kids that are going to be at the same camp as your child; it will make drop-off at camp easier for your child if they recognize some familiar faces.

Create a countdown. My kids love countdowns for holidays, like Christmas and summer vacation. Keep track of the number of days until camp starts by using a countdown calendar, countdown app, or create paper chain links for the number of days until camp starts that you tear off every day. This will help your child build excitement and prepare them for when the big day arrives. Who’s excited about camp? After I completed all of these mentioned recommendations, when I asked the question to my twins again, “Who’s excited about camp?” they both jumped up and down with excitement. And when they attended camp, they loved it! Cheryl Maguire holds a Master of Counseling Psychology degree. She is married and is the mother of twins and a daughter. Her writing has been published in The New York Times, Parents Magazine, AARP, Chicken Soup for the Soul: Count Your Blessings, and Your Teen Magazine. Find her on Twitter @CherylMaguire05. CCM

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things to know when booking sleepaway camp Questions to ask a camp director. By Tanni Haas, Ph.D.

ou’ve gone online, asked everyone you know for recommendations, and otherwise searched for sleepaway camps for your kids. How do you find the one that’s just right for them? When you’ve narrowed down the options to a handful or less, it’s time to speak to the camp directors by phone or email. Below is a list of some of the most important questions to ask. The camp Is the camp accredited, how old is it, and how long have you owned or managed it? In Alberta, it’s a good sign if the camp is accredited by the Alberta Camping Association (ACA). The Alberta Camping Association develops and maintains standards for organized camping in Alberta. It is through the Standards and Accreditation program that they help people identify safe, healthy, well-run camps. The ACA Standards Manual covers all aspects of camp operations ranging from sound financial practices to ensuring safety in various program activities to recommended environmental standards. The manual is continually revised and updated to meet the dynamic camping environment. What’s your philosophy? Camps can be very different. Some camps, especially ones focused on specific sports, can be quite competitive. Other camps are more aimed at instilling in kids certain values, like comradery, cooperation, and conflict-resolution. Make sure the camp’s philosophy matches your own values and that it’s a good fit for your kids.

How do you build community? One of the most satisfying parts of being at camp is feeling part of a larger community. Ask about the camp’s community-building activities, like whether there are nightly campfires or sing-alongs for the entire camp. What’s the accommodation like? Ask whether the kids sleep in cabins or tents, whether there are bathrooms and showers nearby and, most importantly, whether your kids can request to room with friends from home. Whether your kids are first-time or seasoned campers, it’s always comforting and great fun to room with one or more of their regular friends. How much does it cost? You probably don’t need any reminders to ask about the camp fee. But don’t forget to ask whether that fee is all-inclusive or whether there are additional costs for day or overnight trips, transportation to and from camp, special activities, etc. Also ask if there’s a refund policy should your kids get sick, what the deadline for registration is and, in case you missed the deadline, if there’s a waitlist. It’s also a good idea to ask if financial aid or needs-based scholarships are available, perhaps a sibling discount, whether you need to pay everything up front, or whether you can pay in installments. The program How long are the sessions, can they be lengthened or shortened, and how long do most campers stay? Most camps offer sessions of a specific length. However, if you have other things planned for the summer, it can

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“The Alberta Camping Association develops and maintains standards for organized camping in Alberta. It is through the Standards and Accreditation program that they help people identify safe, healthy, well-run camps.”

be useful to either shorten or lengthen a session to fit your schedule. Most kids like to stay at camp as long as all of the other kids (assuming they’re having a great time, no kid wants to be the one getting picked up from camp before everyone else). What do the kids do on a typical day? Try to get a sense of what your kids will be doing on a typical day, including how much time is devoted to indoor and outdoor activities, and what they’ll be doing in the evenings. This will help you decide whether it’s the right camp for them. How do you handle discipline and conflicts between campers? Ask questions that help you decide whether the camp’s parenting philosophy and practices agree with your own. You also want to make sure that your kids are aware of who they’re supposed to speak to in case they have conflicts with other campers, and what kind of behavior can result in serious consequences, up to and including dismissal.

What’s your communication and visiting policy? It’s always a good idea to ﬁnd out how the camp prefers you communicate with your kids. By phone or email? How often? Also ask how many care packages you’re allowed/ encouraged to send, and whether there are designated visiting days. How do you accommodate special needs? A highquality camp is one where all the campers’ different needs are met. Ask how the staff accommodates special needs with respect to activities, behavior, learning, and dietary restrictions. The staff How do you hire, train, and supervise your camp counselors, and what’s the counselor-camper ratio? One of the best signs the camp is of high quality is if it has strict procedures for hiring, training, and supervision of camp counselors. This includes criminal background checks, ﬁrst-aid training, and regular feedback sessions.

The campers How many campers do you have, and how many of them return every year? Generally speaking, the larger the camp the more activities, and the smaller the camp the more intimate it feels. Likewise, the higher the return rate, the more satisﬁed the kids are with the whole camp experience. How do you deal with homesickness? Even the most seasoned campers can get homesick. Ask how the camp deals with homesickness. Do they encourage the campers to call home? Do you get to visit them outside ofﬁcial visiting days? How can your kids stay in touch with their counselors after camp has ended? Kids often develop strong bonds with their counselors. Ask whether they’re encouraged to stay in touch after the camp has ended (who knows, your kids’ favorite counselor could end up being their babysitter). Some camps also host events throughout the year for counselors and campers. It’s a great way to keep in touch until next year’s camp.

Tanni Haas, Ph.D., is a Professor in the Department of Communication Arts, Sciences, and Disorders at The City University of New York - Brooklyn College. CCM

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It’s also a good sign if most of the camp counselors return for several summers (they’re obviously enjoying the experience). And the counselor-to-camper ratio should be relatively low. Is there a medical facility with qualiﬁed personnel? A high-quality camp will either have a licensed physician or nurse on the premises, a well-stocked supply of commonly-used medications, and procedures in place for dispensing medication to all the kids who need them. Also, ask how far away the nearest hospital is, doctor’s ofﬁce, and dental clinic and how the kids will get there, if needed. What are your emergency procedures? Ask the camp director who will contact you in case of an emergency, and who you should contact in case an emergency occurs on your end.

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boost your teen’s self-esteem Help them move through the world with confidence. By Marina Agafonov

een self-esteem is not as tricky as you might think. It’s actually quite easy to understand. Think of their self-esteem as a finicky orchid flower that needs constant attention and its environment around it always seems to be conspiring to wilt it! It is very much the same with an adolescent’s self-esteem. I was bullied for most of my childhood, and the teen years were no different! One of my vivid memories of low self-esteem was when I was in Grade 10. I was nominated and consequently elected to be part of the student body government, and my first thought was: ‘Is this some clever, cruel rouse yet again?’ as that had been my experience in the past. I had such low self-esteem that I couldn’t see that my peers had finally accepted me and saw my leadership potential. The truth of it is, I wasn’t equipped with self-esteem coping ‘tools’ and since then, I have spent much of my time educating adolescents and adults alike on how to cultivate healthy self-esteem. Parents, let’s be honest. You love your child unconditionally, and you see all of the wonderful qualities in your child. But how often do you voice your adoration and admiration to your teen? One of the best ways to encourage your child and nourish their selfesteem is through verbal praise or as Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages of Teenagers, calls it “words of affirmation.“ (Gary’s book is an excellent resource on how to express love and to communicate with your teen.) The more often we hear words of genuine praise, the more inclined we are to believe them. Celebrate your teen’s victories, big and small. Praise them on making a good choice when faced with a friendship dilemma or thank them for doing a wonderful job on their chores. Remember, how you talk to your teen becomes their inner voice. Model high self-esteem. Teens spend at least 10 hours a day away from home, which means you have limited time to make a positive impact that will equip them to deal with the outside world. Choose to model high self-esteem through positive daily interactions with your teen and the people in your life. Children learn early social skills by watching their parents interact with people. Keep that in mind as you go about your daily routine and when your teen is with you. Are you smiling?

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Do you talk positively about your own body? Do you have an ‘I can do it!’ attitude toward challenges? Your teen is watching you, and they are learning how to react in similar situations. So the next time you see your “Easter bunny tummy” in the mirror, instead of groaning and saying, “I hate my body,” try acknowledging your body in a more positive way: “It looks like my body is trying to tell me to be mindful of what I eat and exercise”; thereby modeling positive self-esteem to your teen.

“Healthy self-esteem allows us to interact with others with conﬁdence; as a result, we seek healthier relationships and choose friends who treat us well. We understand our own self-worth, and are more likely to set realistic goals and achieve them.” Did you know that one the most important predictors in high self-esteem and belief in oneself is the amount of time spent together as a family (regardless of how unconventional or conventional your family unit is)? When you sit down to share a meal together, it allows you to create a healthy connection, time for conversation and to genuinely listen to your teen without distractions. This, in turn, builds the child’s resilience levels up by experiencing positive social interactions. Learning begins at home - and learning how to socialize in a positive way

is no different! Dinners and family time together is also a great way to help your child dream and talk about your teen’s aspirations. When you know your child’s dreams, you become their number one motivator on their road to success. Healthy self-esteem allows us to interact with others with confidence; as a result, we seek healthier relationships and choose friends who treat us well. We understand our own self-worth, and are more likely to set realistic goals and achieve them. Nourish your teen’s self-esteem by doing what you do best: encouraging and loving your wonderful teen! How can you instill healthy self-esteem in your teen? 1. Respect. Respect your child by listening to their worries and consider the problem as their truth because at this moment, this is what they are experiencing. 2. Verbal praise. Words of affirmation are the quickest way to boost confidence. 3. New experiences. Allow for a certain level of risktaking as it boosts independence. 4. Model. Parental self-esteem is a great determinant of your teen’s esteem. 5. Eat dinner together. Allow for time to chat and strengthen bonds. 6. I can do it! Demonstrate the ‘I can’ attitude when faced with challenges. 7. Dream big! Create a dream board and talk about your teen’s aspirations. 8. Friendships. Encourage friendships. Being accepted by peers is a crucial factor in predicting high self-esteem. 9. After-school activities. Studies show teens are more resilient if they have activities that allow them to build their own community. 10. Have fun! Remember to take the time to be silly and have fun together! The primary factor here is time spent together.

Marina Agafonov is a Registered Provisional Psychologist who specializes in the areas of depression, anxiety, self-esteem and empowerment for children, teens and women. CCM

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seven ways overnight camp is great for kids Camps help your kids grow. By Jill Morgenstern

ne of the great luxuries of my teaching career was spending summers with my children. My kids took field trips as part of their everyday life, spending the lazy days of summer in museums as often as swimming pools. But as my children grew, I always forfeited some of this special season to overnight camp. The benefits of camp go far beyond a simple vacation for parents. While it might be nice to have some time off parenting duty, your children’s time at camp is well spent. Here are seven ways camp can help your children grow: 1. Exploration. At camp, kids get a smorgasbord of activities that would be near impossible to explore at home. Although there are some camps that specialize in certain areas, most offer kids the chance to participate in a wide variety of activities. As a kid, I loved riflery but hated archery and I would never have known that had it not been for attending camp. 2. Leadership. As your campers grow older, they can focus on the activities they enjoy most and eventually help teach the younger camps. For example, when I first sent my kids to camp, I researched their hiring practices to ensure I was sending them somewhere safe. I was told the camp had to do very little by way of getting to know their hires because most of the counselors were former campers. Now that my older kids are on camp staff, I know what they mean. The people who hired my kids have known them since they were small, occasionally see my kids outside of camp, and definitely know my kids’ strengths and weaknesses. 3. Independence. When my daughter went off to university, I was certain she could operate without me at least for a time. She already had and so had my son. The transition to university will be a big one no matter what, but children who have been to camp have the advantage that they’ve been away from home successfully for extended periods of time. The best camps offer children increasing independence with enough supervision to maintain the children’s safety. 4. Values. The great thing about camp is it encourages independence while supporting a parent’s values. I was a single parent when my kids were in elementary school. I heavily relied on my extended family and community to help me. Camp was part of that community, reinforcing the lessons I tried to teach

“The best camps oﬀer children increasing independence with enough supervision to maintain the children’s safety.” my children at home. And every time I hear someone say that my child is a good kid, I know that it is in part because camp helped me raise both my kids. Not only that, camp makes the learning painless - fun even. Finding a camp that reinforces your values may be as easy as choosing one that reﬂects your religious beliefs but it’s important to be diligent. Ensure you do your research before signing up for a particular camp.

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5. The great outdoors. At camp, kids have the chance to explore the outdoors. Hiking, biking, swimming, or even boating/kayaking or horseback riding might be on the camp’s agenda. These activities will provide a new experience for children who spend a lot of time indoors or reinforce the love they already have for the great outdoors. 6. Community, bonding, and lifelong friends. As I delivered my daughter to camp last year, the arriving campers were treated to a great surprise as one camp alumni proposed to another. Romantic interests aside, when my daughter visits new places, it is often her camp friends she looks up. 7. Time unplugged. Time at camp allows kids relief from keeping up with their virtual world - be it friendly or dramatic. Camp fosters real-life relationships. For some children, especially those who have had difﬁcult online relationships, camp can be a welcome respite. Jill is a wife, a mother of four, and a teacher. She has 13 years of teaching experience and a Master’s Degree in Teaching Reading. CCM

CAMP YMCA

March 23 - 27 (CBE) April 13 - 17 (CCSD) Register online at www.ymcacalgary.org/register Mar/Apr 2020 • calgaryschild.com • 59

Quest Theatre

Quality, licensed and accredited childcare for children up to 5 years old. Located in Inglewood.

Remember the joy of wrapping up your hair in a towel, clutching your hairbrush and singing in the mirror, “Don’t Stop Believing”? Remember making forts out of couch cushions? Remember the huge cardboard box that occupied your imagination for three days? Quest Theatre has been bringing exceptional make-believe adventures to young people for 35 years through the whimsical and inspirational experience of theatre! Quest Theatre’s drama camp program provides students aged 6 to 17 with an unforgettable theatrical creation adventure. Making theatre harnesses the creative ability that young people already possess and teaches skills such as teamwork, self-conﬁdence, dedication, and problem-solving. The Quest team of professional instructors celebrates the organic, ridiculous, and brilliant ideas of every

child! Based at cSPACE King Edward in Marda Loop in July and August, JOURNEYS (ages 6 to 8) and TREKS (ages 9 to 12) are one-week long camps and EXPEDITIONS (ages 11 to 14) and ODYSSEYS (ages 15 to17) are two-weeks long. For more information on Quest Theatre and their drama camps, visit questtheatre.org.

N EGI O ST W R O ATI PE ON N

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summer camp 101 An age-by-age guide to make the most of summer. By Gayla Grace

ummer camp offers all kinds of fun and characterbuilding experiences for kids of any age. Whether you’re looking for a few hours of entertainment or weeks of intentional skill building for your child, you can find it at camp. Q Ages 3 to 5 Day camps offer the perfect opportunity for young kids to experience time away from parents and explore new activities. Camps for preschool children typically focus on free play, sharing with others, group games (inside and outside), and simple arts and crafts. If you’re sending your child to camp for the first time, make sure the schedule matches their personality and routine to prevent a stressful experience. Does there need to be naptime? Should your child be potty trained to attend? Would your child adjust more easily by starting with a half-day camp instead of a full-day camp? Are there appropriate breaks for snacks and changes in activity? It’s important to find out what the counselor-tocamper ratio is for children this age. You want to ensure your child will be adequately cared for with a friendly, well-staffed team. You also want to determine if the counselors are trained to help with issues common to preschoolers including separation anxiety, potty training and temper tantrums. Some of the best places to find camps for young children is through day cares, churches, nursery schools, local elementary schools and, of course, through the most comprehensive summer camp and program guide for Calgary and beyond published in the Spring issue of Calgary’s Child. Specialty camps also abound, for

example, through gymnastic centres, music schools, sporting centres and recreation facilities, arts centres, etc. Consider your child’s interests and ﬁnd a camp that ﬁts to give your preschool child a chance to make new friends and explore new experiences.

“If your child has never experienced camp, start with a day camp or send a friend along for an away camp. It’s important their first camp experience be a positive one.” Q Ages 6 to 11 Elementary-aged children thrive at camp, whether it’s day camp or stay-away camp. It’s the perfect solution to sibling squabbles and long summer days. But it pays to do your research and find the right fit for your child. Camps for this age range from sports camps to music camps to academic camps to church camps. Don’t let the variety of camps intimidate you as you

music and drama camps, for example, are great for this age and help kids advance athletic skills, musical and theatrical talent. Academic camps, geared toward science and technology, for example, offer youthadvanced learning opportunities in subjects they might want to explore for long-term focus. Church camps offer character building and self-awareness experiences not learned in school. Camps provide a safe place for tweens and teens to hang out while parents work during thee summer break. Not yet able to drive or ﬁnd a summer job, kids this age often allow technology to rule or may get into trouble unless parents intentionally seek out creative options for their t(w)eens during the summer.

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Specialty camps close to home also help kids explore new hobbies or create opportunities for parents and kids to enjoy together. A mother-daughter sewing camp, for example, or a father-son golfing camp, for example, allows great bonding time while developing a skill enjoyed by parent and child. If your child has never experienced camp, start with a day camp or send a friend along for an away camp. It’s important their first camp experience be a positive one. If you find it wasn’t a perfect fit, try a different one next year. Don’t give up on the beauty and benefits of camp for elementary-aged children. Q Ages 12 to 15 Tweens and teens have better focus than younger children and benefit from camps more closely matched to their interests and individual personalities. Sports,

Some camps provide certification such as lifeguard training or First-Aid certification that can enable your youth to successfully find a job upon completion. Encourage your youth to research camps with you to find one that best fits their interests and needs. Summer camp offers unique experiences and character-building opportunities for every child. Whether your child is 3 or 15, camp is the perfect place to find adventure and make lifelong memories in the process. Don’t delay; find a camp your child will enjoy today!

- Instructed by theatre professionals - daily performance/sharing - fun games & outside time - inspiring & accessible central location - no experience necessary

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Gayla, freelance writer and mom to ﬁve, has sent her kids to camp every summer and continues to ﬁnd new camps for her one child still at home. CCM

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research. Start with the interests of your child and ask friends and neighbors to provide their opinions and recommendations on camps their kids have attended. This is an ideal age for kids to enjoy activities that may not be available to them at home like zip lining, archery, rock climbing, canoeing and participating in campﬁre sing-alongs with their friends. Kids gain independence as they make decisions and meet new friends outside of the comforts of home. They gain self-conﬁdence in trying new activities. They learn to appreciate the beauty of nature as they unplug from technology. Although they may experience periods of homesickness, they learn to forge through their feelings with caring camp counselors and new friends.

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special camps for special needs Ensure the best fit for your child. Provided by Ourkids.net

any camps offer programs to children with special-needs, including physical challenges, medical conditions, developmental, behavioral or learning disabilities. Whatever their mandate, and whether the camp provides shadows or support staff or requires parents to send someone familiar and experienced in working with their child, these camps have facilities that are adapted for children with specialneeds, and medical/camp staff who are trained to work with these campers. Some camps integrate children with special-needs into their general program; others are entirely devoted to children with specific needs. Both aim to challenge the kids and offer them a rewarding time at camp. Why attend a special-needs camp? Kids who attend these kinds of specialty camps have the extra comfort and confidence of being with peers who have similar experiences and staff who understand their specific needs to fully support them and ensure an enjoyable time at camp.

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Find the right special-needs camp When searching for a special-needs camp, start by researching the location, programs and other speciﬁcations that are important to your family and your child ahead of time. Some camps integrate children with certain needs, others are wholly focused on assisting the camper and their facilities are adapted for their well-being.

Allergies Most camps take food allergies very seriously and put a lot of effort into prevention. (It’s still worth asking about camp policies; and make sure you inform the camp of any allergies before hand). Camp management and staff work hard to ensure that if some campers have food allergies - the most common being peanuts - food containing the allergen doesn’t make its way onto campgrounds.

Staff are trained to be vigilant about potentially harmful foods, know that they can be dangerous to a camper’s health and to take the food if they see some and bring it to dispose of per camp policy. Chefs and kitchen staff are trained to read every label on every ingredient they buy in order to keep the dangerous allergens off camp property. While staff is diligent on the prevention side, training to administer an EpiPen injection in case of an anaphylactic reaction is an important part of the overall safety strategy. Some camps will also prevent those with

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To ensure the best ﬁt for your child, ask about: • medical and professional staff, their experience and expertise • storage and administration of medication • availability of special foods for campers on restricted diets • adaptations or supports offered at the camp to accommodate your child • counselor-to-camper ratios in the case of children with special needs • how your child would be integrated or supported in the camp program, or how the program is designed to suit your child

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Above all Be upfront and provide complete, accurate and up-todate information about your child’s needs and medical requirements. You want to ensure the camp can adequately accommodate your child. Trusted by Canadian parents since 1998, Our Kids is your source to the best summer camps, private schools and extracurriculars. Get the information and feedback you need at ourkids.net. Reprinted with permission by Our Kids, ourkids.net. CCM

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“Be upfront and provide complete, accurate and up-to-date information about your child’s needs and medical requirements. You want to ensure the camp can adequately accommodate your child.”

anaphylaxis from participating in certain canoe trips. Because of the potential for an allergic reaction to occur, coupled with being in the remote wilderness, camps may decide it is too much of a safety risk to send the child. Camps are also good at accommodating for non-life threatening food issues like Celiac’s Disease, gluten and lactose intolerances. Kitchen staff will prepare foods that will provide nutritional value and help prevent ﬂare-ups from food allergies.

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10 steps to squash sibling rivalry Putting an action plan in place. By Christa Melnyk Hines

hether they arrive in the family biologically, through adoption or remarriage, kids don’t get to choose their siblings. With diverse personalities collected under one roof, it’s no wonder siblings have antagonized each other - and aggravated their parents - since the beginning of time. Instead of losing your cool with your clashing kids, try a few of these tips to enjoy a more harmonious household and teach valuable life skills in the process. 1. Take a step back. Unless a sibling squabble is ramping up into a hair-pulling, cat-scratching, fistfighting kind of affair, allow your kids to work out their disagreements on their own. “I give parents permission not to get involved. When we intervene, we are not allowing the skills of conflict resolution or problemsolving," says Jennifer Jackson-Rice, MSW-LSCSW, a therapist certified in Parent-Child Interaction Therapy. 2. Don’t take sides. When your child complains to you of an injustice committed by their sib, you may be tempted to take sides, especially if one child got hit. But it takes two to tango. You can’t know for sure how the situation unfolded or what instigated the physical aggression. Jackson-Rice encourages parents not to get into the weeds of who-did-what-when. “There’s nothing positive that can come out of refereeing a sibling disagreement,” she says. “The only reason we’re involved is because someone wants attention from us, and it’s negative attention.” 3. Take breaks. Instead of playing judge and jury, separate your quarreling offspring for a while. “We need to take a break, and we need to calm down. It doesn’t have to be a punishment. It’s just learning to cope and get through the situation,” says Jackson-Rice. 4. Foster problem-solving. Ask your kids to consider each other’s feelings and work toward problem-solving their disagreements with empathy-building questions like: “How would it make you feel if your brother/sister said that to you?” and solution-seeking queries like: “What can you do to help the situation?” “It’s important for siblings to resolve their issues on their own so they can practice managing challenging interpersonal interactions,” says child and adolescent psychologist Dr. Simone Moody. “As a parent, you will not always be there to rescue your children and solve their problems.” Developing conflict-resolution skills will not only help your kids better manage a dispute on the playground but will also serve them well later in life as they navigate confrontations in their personal relationships or with a pesky co-worker.

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5. Establish house rules. “Make sure your kids understand your family values in terms of kindness and treating each other with love and respect,” says parent coach Sara Minges. Sit down with your children to discuss your family’s values and a simple code of conduct, like keeping hands to yourself, using respectful language, and sharing with others. 6. Reward the positive. “Set an attainable goal for following the rules to earn a desired reward,” suggests Dr. Moody. “Catch your children following these rules often. Provide praise immediately and give them a token to represent each step toward their goal.” For example, you might create a sticker chart or marble/cotton ball jar and every time your kids work well as a team, they receive a token in the jar or a sticker on the chart. When the tokens reach a certain number, they earn a special family activity. 7. Know your hot buttons. “As parents, we are models for our children. It’s important to remain calm and respectful so that we can teach our children to treat others in the same manner,” says Dr. Moody.

“Whatever we water grows. Whatever we pay attention to or whatever we give our kids attention for will grow.” When creating your house rules, consider the types of behaviors your kids do that ﬂip your patience. “What are the things that drive you bonkers? Try to come out with as comprehensive or realistic a list as possible, whether it’s yelling and screaming, throwing things, stomping feet, or using foul language,” says Minges. With a plan in place, it will be easier to keep your cool. For example, you might say: “You know our rule about name-calling. This is your ﬁrst warning. Do it again and you’ll lose your video game time today.” Calmly and consistently follow through whenever necessary. “Kids will learn, ‘Hey, I’m not going to be able to get mom or dad angry so that they just give in,’” says Minges. “If this is how it happens all of the time, it makes it harder for them to take advantage of the situation or try to get out of something.”

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When to consult a professional • Parents can’t spend time with both children at the same time • Routine physical aggression • Frequent degrading statements directed at a sibling (“You’re ugly”/”I hate you”/”You’re fat,” etc.) • Causes signiﬁcant distress in the family • Interferes with quality family life Sources: Jennifer Jackson-Rice; Dr. Simone Moody

8. Acknowledge conﬂict-resolution in action. “Remember to praise your children when they resolve an issue appropriately,” advises Moody. “If only one child is managing the situation appropriately, give praise and attention to that child’s behavior (‘Great job staying calm!’) and ignore minor misbehavior of the other child (taunting, boasting, and complaining).” By focusing on the positive interactions, the negative interactions are likely to decrease. “Whatever we water grows. Whatever we pay attention to or whatever we give our kids attention for will grow,” says Jackson-Rice. 9. Don’t compare your kids. While competition can be healthy, it shouldn’t fuel an all-out war in your household. Try not to perpetuate sibling rivalry by drawing comparisons between your kids. One child may learn to ride a bike sooner than the other, while the other ﬁgures out how to cross the monkey bars faster. One may be better at basketball while the other excels at art. “Focus on each child’s individual strengths. Encourage your children to participate in activities that foster their unique strengths,” says Dr. Moody. Also, spend time one-on-one with your kids by engaging them in their favorite activities, playing a game, or going for walks together. Individual time strengthens parent-child bonds and helps kids feel valued for who they are rather than how well they perform at a particular activity. 10. Promote a team atmosphere. Initiate teambuilding opportunities like playing a game as a team rather than as opponents, helping to prepare dinner, cleaning up after a meal, or doing yard work together. Again, reinforce positive interactions by praising your kids whenever they work or play well together. Freelance writer Christa and her husband are the parents of a pair of squabbling siblings who are forced to work out their differences while doing yard work and post-dinner cleanup. CCM

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