Issue 9: Companionship by PS Magazine

NO. 9 PS MAG A ZINE MARCH/APRIL 2015

MARCH/APRIL 2015 ISSUE 9

Jeanne Phillips is

DEAR ABBY An Exclusive Interview

Good Relationtips What You Don’t Know About St. Patrick’s Day

The Companionship Issue

PLATINUM MARRIAGES

70+ Years of Love & Devotion

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The Companionship Issue March/April 2015 Issue 9

FEATURES

Developing Friendships: A Remedy for Loneliness by Craig Osbern

Good Relationtips: Most Repeated Advice Across 25 Popular Relationship Guides from Information is Beautiful

Going Platinum: 70 Years (or More) of Love & Devotion Keep These Couples Happily Married

Everything You Didn’t Know About St. Patrick’s Day by Seamus Mullarkey

Your Friend and Mine: Jeanne Phillips is Dear Abby by Christina Burns 2

A lone parrotfish regards a school of grey grunts, Galapagos Islands, Ecuador. DAVID DOUBILET /NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC CREATIVE

IN EVERY ISSUE

DEPARTMENTS 6 Remember When

10 Did You Know?

49 Book: Dead Wake, The Last Crossing of the Lusitania

11 Health & Wellness: The Nature of Tai Chi 17 Life with The Eden Alternative: To See and Be Seen

Letter from the Publisher

Games & Puzzles

54 Fun & Games

22 The Benjamin Rose Institute on Aging: Senior Companions

57 Horoscopes

26 Dr. Lori: Social Isolation

64 The Last Laugh

61 Puzzle Solutions 3

LE T TE R FROM THE PUBLI SHE R I recently achieved one of those somewhat arbitrary milestone birthdays and, while I am not going to disclose to you which one it was, I will say that I did take a few quiet moments to reflect upon some of my younger decades in life. Knowing that this issue of PS Magazine was focused on companionship, I started to unpack what companionship has meant to me over the course of my years. Happening to be temporarily free of the Cleveland cold and attending a conference in Florida, I stared out at the ocean and rummaged through my mind and its network of memories. Just as I believe many of us experience, I had a hard time recalling any memories that did not also include someone else, some “companion” at that time in my life. My first companion was my sister, Karen, and I think back fondly to those early grade school days when we’d warm our bowls of Cheerios on the stove top and walk to school together. With my cousin, Chris, we spent countless adolescent days shooting hoops, playing stickball, and charging into crashing waves on the Jersey shore. I’d also add our family dog, Duke (named after John Wayne…R.I.P., buddy!), as one of my closest childhood companions—I still consider teaching Duke to catch biscuits off his nose one of my finest achievements! Today, I have the ultimate life-companionship with my wife, Susan, who shares with me already more than 20 years of an always-evolving, loving partnership. Together, she and I revel in the lives of our three children, watching and guiding them as they discover new companions today, who will help shape their friendships and relationships tomorrow. I believe that every one of us carries within a trove of connections from a lifetime of companionships. Some remain with us forever, and some do not, but they all contribute to our individuality and, by extension, to the communities and cultures in which we live. I invite you to stare at the horizon wherever you are reading this, and remember and celebrate the lives of those whose companionship helped make you who you are today.

Sincerely,

John Polatz Publisher and CEO

Salon PS LLC CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER

John Polatz CO-FOUNDER

Scott Fisher EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT

Shelley Kondas PUBLISHER AND CEO

VICE PRESIDENT — ADMINISTRATION & LICENSING

John Polatz

Susan Polatz

EDITOR IN CHIEF

VICE PRESIDENT — FINANCE & ACCOUNTING

Christina Burns

Ranae Lewis

ART DIRECTOR

VICE PRESIDENT — TECHNOLOGY

Elle Chyun

Brandon Crafts

EDITORS AT LARGE

VICE PRESIDENT — BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT

Dr. Lori Stevic-Rust Laura Beck, The Eden Alternative CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

Katherine Adams Seamus Mullarkey Craig Osbern Cristina Nascimento Patel

Brian Goetz VICE PRESIDENT — BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT

Kristin Hinkson

PS Magazine is published by Salon PS Magazine LLC Salon PS Magazine LLC 55 Public Square Suite 1180 Cleveland, OH 44113 Phone: (440) 600-1595 Fax: (440) 848-8560 © 2015 Salon PS Magazine LLC.All rights reserved. Reproduction without permission is prohibited. To order a subscription or to distribute PS Magazine at your business, contact info@salonps.com

Cover: “Dear Abby” Author Jeanne Phillips Photo: AP Photo/Damian Dovarganes

DIRECTOR — PROCUREMENT & LOGISTICS

Kenish Patel DIRECTOR — HUMAN RESOURCES

Debra Moore

POP CULTURE, NEWS, AND EVENTS FROM PAST DECADES

Remember When... 1935

The first National Cherry Blossom Festival, held in Washington, DC, began an annual three-week event to celebrate spring and cultural diversity. NBC and American Tobacco’s Lucky Strike launched the 60-minute radio show, Your Hit Parade, which played the week’s most popular songs. PHOTO: NBC/NBCU PHOTO BANK VIA GETTY IMAGES

1945 Popular war correspondent Ernie Pyle was killed by Japanese machine-gun fire on the island of Ie Shima (now Iejima) in the Pacific.

PHOTO: CLASSICSTOCK.COM/SUPERSTOCK

Harry S. Truman was sworn in as the 33rd President of the United States after Franklin D. Roosevelt died of a massive stroke.

1955

1965

1975

Franco-American’s SpaghettiOs was launched with the catchy jingle, “Uh-Oh! SpaghettiOs,” sung by Jimmie Rodgers. PHOTO: COURTESY OF CAMPBELL’S

Dr. Jonas Salk’s polio vaccine was declared safe and effective, and a nationwide inoculation campaign began.

PHOTO: EVERETT COLLECTION/SUPERSTOCK

ABC’s Good Night America, hosted by Geraldo Rivera, presented the firstever network television showing of private citizen Abraham Zapruder’s film of the JFK assassination.

The Sound of Music, starring Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer, opened in theaters nationwide. PHOTO: MICHAEL OCHS ARCHIVES/GETTY IMAGES

Inventor Walter Fredrick Morrison created the Pluto Platter, which would eventually be renamed as the Frisbee.

The original production of A Chorus Line opened Off-Broadway where the entire run was immediately sold-out, prompting its move to Broadway. PHOTO: REG INNELL/TORONTO STAR VIA GETTY IMAGE

1985

1995

2005

The Oklahoma City bombing of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building killed 168 people including 19 children. Pope Benedict XVI became the 265th pope following the death of Pope John Paul II.

New Coke was introduced with the intention of replacing the original formula of Coca-Cola, marking the first change in its then99-year history. PHOTO: AL FRENI/THE LIFE IMAGES COLLECTION/GETTY IMAGES

The Tyler Civitan Club was the first group to volunteer for the Adopt-a-Highway program, committed to picking up trash along a designated two-mile stretch on Texasâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Highway 69. 8

PHOTO: PHOTOTHEK VIA GETTY IMAGES

The Major League Baseball strike officially ended the day before the season was scheduled to start with replacement players. JOHN IACONO /SPORTS ILLUSTRATED/GETTY IMAGE

After serving five months time, Martha Stewart was released from federal prison wearing a homemade poncho by another inmate. JEFF HAYNES/AFP/GETTY IMAGES

Remember When... FRANK DANDRIDGE/THE LIFE IMAGES COLLECTION/GETTY IMAGES

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Led the 54-Mile Selma to Montgomery March for Voting Rights

ollowing the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, activists in Alabama peacefully protested in favor of black American citizens’ constitutional right to vote, in defiance of segregationist repression. This successfully resulted in the creation of the Voting Rights Act, which prohibited most of the discriminatory practices used to prevent blacks from registering to vote in the South, and allowed federal registrars to ensure that the law was implemented. The march ended on the steps of the state capitol building, where Dr. King delivers his speech, “How Long, Not Long”: “The end we seek is a society at peace with itself, a society that can live with its conscience... I know you are asking today, ‘How long will it take?’ I come to say to you this afternoon, however difficult the moment, however frustrating the hour, it will not be long.”

Martin Luther King, Jr. and his wife Coretta Scott King lead the march from Selma, Alabama to the state capital in Montgomery, March 30, 1965. PHOTO BY WILLIAM LOVELACE/EXPRESS/GETTY IMAGES

DID YOU KNOW

Appearing in ancient Egypt approximately 4,800 years ago, the first recorded wedding rings were made of twisted sedges and reeds formed into a circle that represented eternity. Wedding bands are often worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because the ancient Greeks maintained that the “ring” finger contained the vena amoris, or the “vein of love,” that runs straight to the heart (scientists have since disproven the existence of the love vein). 10

PHOTO: KIRILL KURASHOV /123RF

An ongoing Northwestern University study shows that the brains of “SuperAgers”—highly functional people age 80 and older—are distinctly different than those of most individuals of similar ages. Images show that SuperAgers’ brains have a thicker region of the cortex, far fewer tangles (a primary indication of Alzheimer’s disease), and a large supply of neurons linked to higher social intelligence. Learning more about their brains may help lead to new ways to protect the memories of other seniors and to combat dementia.

PHOTO: MELINDA NAGY/123RF

Exchanging eggs in the springtime dates back to a pagan custom. The egg, an ancient symbol of new life and rebirth, now represents Jesus’s emergence from the tomb and resurrection to Christians celebrating Easter around the world. The tradition of decorating eggs for Easter began in the 13th century. Forbidden during Lent, eggs were painted and given as gifts as people celebrated Easter and the end of the period of fasting and penance.

PHOTO: JOINGATE/123RF

FASCINATING FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL

PHOTO: MICHAEL OCHS ARCHIVES/GETTY IMAGES

HEALTH & WELLNESS

THE NATURE OF

Tai Chi

ai chi is an ancient form of martial arts that consists of a series of movements designed to promote the flow of energy in the body, increase balance, strength, and flexibility, and calm the mind. You have probably seen it, if you haven’t yet tried it. It’s not uncommon to see a group of seniors, often Chinese, sometimes outside during the morning hours, practicing tai 11

tai chi together, moving in a slow, methodical, almost dream-like synchronization. According to Chinese tradition, the martial art was practiced in order to hone the body for fighting, which was most effective when the body’s energy had been harnessed and the mind was focused. Chi (Qi), as it is known in Chinese, is energy itself. It is the force that drives all things. If you want to be healthy, it is believed that chi must flow through the body unhindered, like water. If one becomes a master of one’s chi, anything is possible. Physical strength is nothing without chi. In fact, physical strength is nothing beside chi, which, according to practitioners, can be gathered together as a single ball of energy and forced out of the body like an explosion, and potentially with great devastation. The so-called “chi punch” is the Chinese folkloric method of attack that only the most advanced can perform. Bruce Lee’s famous one-inch punch was, so he claimed, the result of mastering his chi. But that is not the reason you might be interested in tai chi, nor the reason you might wish to join that group one morning while they 12

go through the slow rhythm of the tai chi routine. Tai chi has reached the West where it has become, first and foremost, a form of exercise. It combines a number of bodily postures that flow one into the other, like a single dance, matching the tempo of the heart and breath to its graceful measures. As an exercise, it is both simple and complex. It takes time to get the poses correct, which involve moving the body over the center of gravity along with coordinating hand movements. It can take a lifetime to master the forms. At the same time, it is low-impact and keeps the cardio level low. The risk of injury is small. Once the routine is under your belt, so to say, the opportunities to enhance your practice grow. For tai chi is believed most beneficial as a kind of meditation, a way to concentrate the mind only on the task in front of you, to synchronize your breathing as it is taken into and expelled from your lungs. The movements themselves are designed to harness energy and move it through the body, so that any stress held there blocking the path of chi is

PHOTO: DIANA HIRSCH/ISTOCK

removed. Mind and body thus work together to create a sense of warmth, relaxation, and peace. The health benefits of tai chi are many. As with all gentle exercise, toning the muscles and keeping the joints in working order are primary goals. The meditative aspect makes this exercise even more appealing as it is not nearly as strenuous as yoga, but like yoga, tai chi has been shown to reduce stress in the mind and help moderate pain in the body. Practitioners of the ancient technique will testify that it balances the bodily systemsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the yin and yangâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;creating a body in harmony with its elemental forces, which is crucial to health and longevity. It may also help with heart disease, blood pressure, depression, cancer, digestion, and a variety of other diseases. The list is quite long. However, there is not enough scientific study to endorse this particular form of exercise and meditation over another. Medical research does seem to point to a greater sense of balance, which is important as we age in order to avoid falls. Studies have shown that people who have practiced tai chi in their younger years have a lower risk of

falling. In another study, some subjects who had demonstrated issues with balance had measurable improvement after two months of practicing tai chi. Another good thing about tai chi: you can practice it anywhere, alone or with friends, and no special equipment is needed. If you move with moderation and common sense, there are very few contraindications, but you should check with your healthcare practitioner before beginning any new exercise. 13

Tai Chi: Simple Exercises for Promoting Balance Tai chi promotes flexibility, balance, and awareness of your body and is a beautiful form of exercise. It is also practical—it can be done just about anywhere that allows for free movement and requires no equipment, just flat-soled shoes and loose, comfortable clothing. When practicing tai chi, remember to: • Move slowly and at an even pace. You are exercising your body as well as the energy within your body. • Move your body as one unit, rather than in sections. • Do not let your knees go farther out than the end of your toes or collapse inward, doing so can seriously injure your knees. 14

BREATHING 1. Place your feet to be shoulder-width apart, and place your hand on your lower abdomen, about 2 inches below your navel. Push in lightly. Breathe in and out through your nose slowly (lips loosely together) from this area of your abdomen. (If you can’t feel this area moving, push in with your hand a bit more.) Keep your tongue on the roof of your mouth (as if saying “la”). 2. Start relaxing every part of your body, one at a time, beginning with your feet and work up to your scalp. If you start to sway, slightly readjust your feet and concentrate on your balance until you’re steady again.

AWAKENING THE CHI

BALL OF ENERGY

1. With legs slightly bent and shoulderwidth apart, chin tucked in slightly, start to bring your hands together with palms facing up to chest level as you breathe in.

1. Rub your hands briskly together as you would to warm your hands on a cold day, then pull your hands apart with gentle, fluid motion while your hands and fingers remain relaxed.

2. Push the air down with your palms facing down and your elbows slightly out to the side. As you push down, let your knees push down with your hands until your hands are at thigh level as you breathe out. 3. Repeat 6â&#x20AC;&#x201C;8 times and then return to the starting position.

2. Bring your hands closer together without them touching. Continue to pull your hands away and bring them close in a slow and steady rhythm. Feel the energy in your hands as well as the energy connecting them. 3. Repeat 6â&#x20AC;&#x201C;8 times and then simply pull your hands slowly apart and let them drop down at your sides. 15

LIFE WITH THE EDEN ALTERNATIVE

To See and Be Seen

by LAURA BECK 17

ori, an Ithaca College masters student in Occupational Therapy, is chatting with me over finger sandwiches and veggie roll-ups. We are table mates at the annual banquet for Project Generations, an intergenerational initiative that pairs college students with community elders in Ithaca, New York, where I live. Project Generations is more than a friendly visiting program; it’s about building close and continuing relationships, many of them over the course of several years. In Tori’s case, she and Liz, her Project Generations partner, have connected on a weekly basis for the last four years. She shares a tender story with me of their devotion to each other: “When she’s sick, I’m there, and when I’m sick, she’s there,” Tori explains. Once, when Tori was hospitalized suddenly and admitted to the ICU, it was Liz who was the first one by her side, “She just had this outpouring of love for me. It was just 100% unconditional.” As Tori’s story unfolds, the depth of their relationship is clear and rich in the ups and downs of daily life. “Liz has been through all of the boyfriends,” she adds with a smile. 18

As lunch continues, the plot thickens. Rachel, another Project Generations member, bounds into the room, delighted to “show off her awesome Mr. Jacobs” to her friends. The repartee between Rachel and Mr. Jacobs is priceless, truly the stuff of two people who just “get” each other. The two have roughly 40–50 years between them, but clearly they are twin souls. Talking about their shared affinity for chess, Rachel affectionately goads her partner, “I’m a better chess player than you now. The student has become the master, my friend!” Why am I here? I’ve been asked to be the featured speaker for the Project Generations banquet, but the notion of “speaking” to this inspiring intergenerational audience seems a little ridiculous to me. From the minute I met them, it was clear to me that any learning this group and I would do together would come to life through their stories— not mine. Standing up and talking “at them” just didn’t strike me as an option. So, we turned instead to the power of simple conversation. Pulling our chairs into a circle, we began with the subject of ageism

as a point of reference—what it means, its impact on people of all ages, and how it breeds loneliness, helplessness, and boredom. This group’s work (and play) together, I noted, was an excellent example of how a single relationship can help break down the barriers that ageism creates between people of different ages. Ranging in age from 19 to 93, we reflected on the following question: “What has surprised you the most about the relationship you have built with your Project Generations partner?” For Tori, it is two things. “I always used to quit everything. I never kept anything up. I used to quit activities; I’d quit people. But this is different.” Her second point is about the way her connection with Liz makes her feel. “I’m not sure I’ve felt quite this special or so important to someone before. Liz is one of my biggest supporters.” Liz shares an equally heartfelt description of what this relationship means to her in the circle. The two women squeeze hands and brush a few tears aside. As the conversation continues, amidst a few more tears and some laughter, I am deeply humbled by the insight, presence, and

Loving companionship is the antidote to loneliness.

commitment of everyone in the room. Repeatedly, both students and Elders share how surprised they’ve been by how much their Project Generations experience has touched them. And, as one Elder shares, the lines between the generations just begin to blur… and what remains is really what it’s all about in the first place— the precious, heartfelt connection between two human souls. Principle Three of The Eden Alternative states that “loving companionship is the antidote to loneliness.” Recent studies are providing hard data that this antidote has more impact than we once realized. Not only is companionship good for the soul, but it is important for our physical health. Current research shows that loneliness and the stress associated with it 19

are directly connected to heart disease and other inflammatory conditions, as well as disruption of healthy immunity. Recognizing years ago how vital connectedness is to our overall well-being, we created something called Embracing Elderhood at The Eden Alternative. The inspiration behind this initiative was the notion that to truly care for someone, you must have a deeper understanding and appreciation of who they are. Our goal was to pair people ages 16 and older with elders for the better part of a year. During this time, each pair would work together on capturing the elder’s life story. The stories themselves, while precious, are really just a means to an end. It is the relationships that arise from the process of unfolding them that are the true gem. At the kick-off training for our pilot project of Embracing Elderhood, it was clear that our volunteers saw their contribution as a good deed, an act of selflessness that would make an older person feel good. In their eyes, the process was merely a oneway street—they would give and their elder storyteller would receive. End of story. While we knew better, 20

we quietly acknowledged that their time together would reveal a very different story. Take Miss Bea and Kyle for instance. A high school junior at a prestigious prep school, Kyle was facing academic challenges that were threatening his enrollment. Through loving encouragement and her steadfast belief in Kyle’s ability to succeed, Miss Bea refused to let Kyle give up. Her unwavering support proved to be a boon on the athletic field, too. A former athlete herself, Miss Bea could be seen in the stands, shouting Kyle’s baseball team to a regional victory. Pleasantly surprised by the impact she seemed to have on Kyle’s life, Miss Bea shared, “Kyle’s like the grandson I never had. When young people stop and listen to you, you can teach them a lot. You never know how you can affect someone else’s life.” While Kyle and Miss Bea affirmed how even the most unlikely of relationships can transform lives, it was Jackie and Betty that surprised us the most. During the pilot training, it was Jackie who stepped up as our most ardent skeptic. Highly intellectual and pragmatic,

The stories themselves, while precious, are really just a means to an end. It is the relationships that arise from the process of unfolding them that are the true gem.

Jackie didn’t buy for a minute that embarking on this project had anything to do with her own growth. She scoffed at heartfelt testimonials and examples as “touchy feely” attempts to manipulate her and prescribe her experience of the project. Yet, as she and her 93-year-old partner, Betty, began spending time together, a kind of alchemy began to reveal itself. By the end of the year, it was Jackie’s humble assessment of the process that ended up touching us the most. At the tail-end of her evaluation, she shared, “I have been surprised by how much my time with Betty has meant to me. What has been particularly poignant has been experiencing my life with her. My engagement this fall, my marriage

in January, and buying and settling into our first house—these are all things that are as vivid for her now as when she experienced them 70 years ago. It has been really precious to relive her past experiences with each of these things as I’m living my present ones. It gives me focus and perspective to be with someone towards the end of her life, to reflect back on 90 years of living, three children, and 56 years of marriage, and share what are the important things that have stuck with her all this time and what she has learned about living, and about love.” And there you have it. To see and to be seen… this is the gift that keeps on giving—no matter who we are, no matter how old we may be.

Laura Beck is the Learning and Development Guide for The Eden Alternative, an international, non-profit organization focused on creating quality of life for Elders and their care partners. For more information about The Eden Alternative, go to www.edenalt.org. 21

THE BENJAMIN ROSE INSTITUTE ON AGING

SENIOR COMPANIONS & Giving Back

or many, volunteering is a meaningful way to make a difference in your community. Getting up close and personal with an organizational mission can often open our eyes to a different way of life. Not only that, volunteering is also a great way to develop new skills, make new friends, and shake up your routine. Our golden years are the perfect time to volunteer. With newfound time, volunteering is a great opportunity to make an impact, especially for those who are still healthy and active. Virginia Pearson, a Senior Companion with the Benjamin Rose Institute on Aging, says she is a firm

believer in this sentiment, “God gave us these years. Let’s share them with others.” Benjamin Rose is one of many organizations across the country that offers the Senior Companions program, a part of the Corporation for National and Community Service’s Senior Corps program. Senior Companions are retired adults age 55 and older who provide assistance to other older adults who are often isolated and lonely. Volunteers offer assistance with bill paying, shopping, daily living tasks, but most of all, companionship and friendship. Volunteers serve an average of 20 hours a week in adult care homes, senior centers, senior housing complexes, and private residences, offering respite for family members and professional caregivers. In some instances, Senior Companions may be the only people that clients will see for days at a time. Benjamin Rose Senior Companions go through extensive training to learn how to properly care for their clients. With 24 hours of classroom training, 20 hours of on-site mentoring, and monthly in-service programs, you can be

assured that Senior Companions are prepared and dedicated to serving their clients. Senior Companions are truly making a difference in the lives of their clients. Whether they’re helping them paint their nails, cooking dinner, or teaching them how to read, these volunteers are remarkably passionate. One client describes her Senior Companion as “her best friend.” In the end, that’s really what these volunteers are to their clients: friends. 23

SENIOR CORPS Conceived during John F. Kennedy’s presidency, Senior Corps trains volunteers to become mentors, coaches, or companions to people in need, or to contribute their job skills and expertise to community projects and organizations so they can make a contribution that suits their talents, interests, and availability. Volunteers must be age 55 and older, and are given a pre-service orientation, on-the-job training from a placement agency or organization, and supplemental insurance while on duty. Through Senior Corps, there are several ways to volunteer. Senior Companions Whether you’re giving families or a professional caregiver’s much-needed time off, running errands, or simply being a friend, you’ll make a difference. The Senior Companions program is aimed at helping citizens who need extra assistance to live independently, such as adults with disabilities or those with terminal illnesses and their caregivers. Participants provide both emotional and physical support by assisting with simple house 24

chores, providing transportation, offering companionship, and simply adding richness to their clients’ lives. Foster Grandparents You’re a role model, a mentor, and a friend to young children while serving at one of thousands of local organizations. The program’s goal is to provide “grandparents” who will give emotional support to victims of abuse, or to tutor, mentor, and care for children with disabilities or in need. RSVP RSVP offers a full range of volunteer opportunities with thousands of local and national organizations. Flexible in nature, RSVP allows participants to choose how and when they work. One of the more widespread RSVP programs is a telephone reassurance service. RSVP volunteers contact other seniors by phone to ensure their well-being and to provide social interaction. To learn more, visit www.nationalservice.gov/programs/senior-corps 25

Social support can be defined in tangible and measurable ways such as the number of friends or personal relationships you have. It can also be described in more subjective Doctor ways, such as the feeling of being Lori Stevic-Rust connected to others. Whichever way that social support is defined, The Problem there is substantial evidence that of Social it has direct effects on psychological and physical well-being as well as indirect stress buffering effects. any Americans are Creating more social support missing meaningful can mean different things to social supportâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;someone different people. Some people find they confide in emotionally and support and comfort in one-on-one intellectually. Over the past 20 interactions while others enjoy the years, there has been a consistent dynamics of a group experience. stream of research to support the Regardless of what type of support finding that social isolation is dan- is right for you, the benefits of a good gerous to your health. Many studsocial network includes more proies have shown that having strong ductivity and success, increased support from family and friends energy and motivation, better mental can help to keep your blood preshealth and improved coping capasure down and your heart funcbilities, and improved overall tioning well. Specifically, it was physical health. found that when subjects were Recognizing what type of support performing a stressful act or is missing in your life is key to undergoing a painful procedure, finding ways to fill the void. Emotional they were able to keep their heart support will provide you with a rate lower when a friend or family confidant who will simply listen member accompanied them. and offer advice, or guidance, or to

I S O L AT I O N

you. If you have a group of individuals who enjoy the same intellectual, social, and physical activities, it can help to keep you engaged and motivated to pursue your interests. It is also important to consistently challenge yourself to be exposed to differing opinions, experiences, and knowledge bases to stay balanced and grow. Remember that nurturing your relationships may be the best use of your time. Science consistently shows us that our relationships are the fuel for our creativity, success, and our physical and emotional well-being.

LEO CULLUM, THE NEW YORKER COLLECTION/THE CARTOON BANK

act as an outlet to vent concerns. On the other hand, instrumental support refers to assistance with tasks or tangible support with financial, medical, or service needs. There are many ways to be successful in attaining social support. Simply being shy or too busy is no reason to feel isolated and lonely. Social networking has a tendency to conjure up the image of “working a room” and making small talk or aggressively “selling” yourself to strangers, but this does not have to be the case. Networks come in all shapes and sizes. Identify individuals and groups who share similar interests as

“He’s a porcupine, and he’s prickly. I accept that.” 27

Developing Friendships

A Remedy for Loneliness

POPPERFOTO/GETTY IMAGES

by CRAIG OSBERN

The only way to have a friend is to be one. —RALPH WALDO EMERSON

e live longer than we used to—a lot longer. As we live longer, there’s a greater chance that we will retire, and maybe move, divorce, or lose loved ones. And all that can lead to loneliness. As Judith Shulevitz reported in the New Republic in 2013, “one in three Americans over 45 identifies as chronically lonely, up from just one in five a decade ago.” That’s important because studies consistently show that loneliness is bad for your health. It reclaims some of those additional life years. On the other hand, studies show that having friends and feeling connected to a community reduces blood pressure, raises endorphin levels, and improves health. A study at Brigham Young University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill reviewed data from a pool of 300,000 people in nearly 150 studies and found that people who were connected to

the community through friends or family lived 3.7 years longer than isolated people. Additional years of life aren’t the whole story—people with friends have a better quality of life, so those 3.7 years are valued, and worth living. In our younger years, it was easier to make friends. We had youth and energy and new interests to fuel our excitement. And perhaps we weren’t as discerning as we have grown to be. But more crucially, environments such as college and the workplace fulfilled the conditions that sociologists consider vital to making friends: proximity, repeated and unplanned interactions, and a setting that allows people to drop their guard and confide in each other. As the external conditions of our lives change, it becomes tougher to meet those criteria. After all, work fulfilled some of those requirements by providing repeated and unplanned 29

❖ Are you a fan of ballet, theater, or art? Sign up for a membership. Theater memberships direct you to productions on a regular basis. After a few weeks, you’ll probably be able to identify other members. Strike up a conversation about what you’ve just seen. Plus, if you sign up for two tickets, you’ll have a spare to offer someone. interactions (and perhaps enough stress to encourage bonding). When we retire, we lose that structure. So, how do we start to make friends? First, decide to make friends. A commitment to making friends is the first step to getting them. After that, there are specific actions you can take. Make use of the resources available to you—if you are in a senior community, talk to the event coordinator, or a social worker. Also, check the bulletin boards for information about groups and events. ❖ Donate time to a hobby such as tending plants in a nursery or try your hand as a museum guide. 30

❖ Take a trip and explore your area. Many retirement communities arrange trips nearby. ❖ Take a class at a local college or any continuing adult education class. This doesn’t have to be something you are good at. (I once took a life drawing class in which the teacher would circle the room and comment on each drawing. When he looked at mine, he paused and said, somberly, “Keep trying.” My ineptitude started several conversations!) ❖ Social media is here to stay and you don’t have to be an expert to have a Google Circle or Facebook page. Both do much of the work of

PHOTOS: PHOTODISC/GETTY IMAGES

❖ If you’re a member at the Y, ask for a list of senior programs, such as Silver Sneakers.

linking you with old colleagues or your second cousin. ❖ Walking a dog can be a great way to meet people. Plus, dogs start conversations when people can’t or won’t. Get your own dog or walk one for an animal rescue center. Doing for others, even for dogs, is a great mood booster. ❖ Volunteer at a hospital, shelter, church, or synagogue. ❖ If you are good at something, there’s a good chance that someone else would like to be good at it as well. Are you already a Facebook wiz? Then help others get on. Put your own sign up on the bulletin board in your community. If you’re looking on that board for something to learn, others probably are as well. It is easy to be in the habit of saying “no,” but saying “yes” to invitations, outings, and events will yield great dividends. If that is difficult for you, then consider hosting people in your home. Host a potluck dinner, a bridge game, or poker night. If you prefer simply to watch television, invite someone over for a night of Dancing with the

Stars, Jeopardy!, or your favorite program. Once you develop acquaintances, not only can acquaintances become friends, they can also lead to meeting new people. New friendships are like freshly potted plants. They need loose earth and plenty of water and sun. So give the friendship room and time to grow without crowding. Grow your circle. Friends make more friends.

Craig Osbern is the author of Predator’s Tread and other writings, and is working on a mystery surrounding the families of 9/11. He lives in New York City with his wife and daughter. 31

Good Relationtips most repeated advice across 25 popular relationship guides

sources: Huffington Post, Harville Hendrix, Cosmo, Elle, PsychCentral, Readers Digest, Happy Wives Club and others

INFOGRAPHIC: DAVID MCCANDLESS/INFORMATION IS BEAUTIFUL

Vice President and Mrs. Bush at Kennebunkport, Maine, 1988

GOING PLATINUM 70 Years (or More) of Love & Devotion Keep These Couples Happily Married

Couples that achieve the platinum wedding anniversary of 70 years are not simply inspirational—their stories are the stuff that can turn anyone into a true romantic. George and Barbara Bush This January, former President George H.W. and First Lady Barbara Bush celebrated their platinum anniversary. “Seventy years ago this very day, Barbara Pierce of Rye, NY made me the happiest, and luckiest, man on Earth,” President Bush shared on the social media website, Twitter. Mr. and Mrs. Bush are the longest-married presidential couple in history (seconded by Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter who married in July 1946). The first couple met at a Christmas dance in Andover, Massachusetts while both were attending high school. He proposed 18 months later before leaving to fight in World War II as a pilot in the Navy. George returned from the war in September 1944 after being shot down and nearly killed during a mission over the Pacific, and four months later they married on January 6, 1945 in Rye, New York. The couple went on to have six children: four sons and two daughters. Their marriage survived the tragedy of losing their eldest daughter, Robin, to leukemia when she was three years old. They spent their child-rearing years in Texas during the oil boom. George and Barbara Bush Mrs. Bush described those years in cutting their wedding cake, a speech from 1985 as: “A period for Rye, New York, 1945 me of long days and short years, of PHOTOS: GEORGE BUSH PRESIDENTIAL LIBRARY AND MUSEUM

diapers, runny noses, earaches, more Little League games than you could believe possible, tonsils and those unscheduled races to the hospital emergency room, Sunday school and church, of hours of urging homework, short chubby arms around your neck and sticky kisses and experiencing bumpy moments—not many, but a few—of feeling that I’d never, ever be able to have fun again, and coping with the feeling that George Bush, in his excitement of starting a small company Former President George H.W. and traveling around the world, was Bush and First Lady Barbara having a lot of fun.” Bush, June 12, 2012 Life changed when George turned to public service including terms as a US congressman, Ambassador to the United Nations, head of the Central Inelligence Agency (CIA), Vice President under President Ronald Reagan, and, of course, the 41st President of the United States. Barbara was right by his side during the twists and turns of his political career. In her 1994 autobiography, Barbara Bush: A Memoir, Barbara describes a period of time in the mid-1970’s when she was deeply depressed: “He was working such incredibly long hours at his job [CIA], and I swore to myself I would not burden him. Then he would come home and I would tell him all about it. Night after night George held me weeping in his arms while I tried to explain my feelings. I almost wonder why he didn’t leave me. I knew it was wrong, but couldn’t seem to pull out of it.” Throughout their marriage, George and Barbara lived in 30 homes in 17 cities. The White House was their 29th home. Since retiring from politics in 1992, Mr. and Mrs. Bush split their time between their homes in Houston, Texas, and Kennebunkport, Maine. PHOTO: AP PHOTO/CHARLES KRUPA

Elmer and Charlene Jansen Mr. and Mrs. Elmer and Charlene Jansen met in Coconut Grove, Florida on a blind date arranged by Charlene’s sister. They dated for 17 months and were married on June 17, 1942. Shortly after their marriage, they moved to Louisiana, where Elmer joined the Army and soon left for World War II. To get through the long time apart, “I moved back with my mother in Florida, worked at the US Censorship to save money for a house and wrote Elmer a letter every night for 33 months.” One of the happiest moments of Charlene and Elmer’s life together was when Elmer returned from the war overseas. Charlene describes that special time as her true “newlywed years,” because they had been apart for such a long time. After the war, the couple built a life together in North Miami, where they raised eight children. Elmer worked hard to become an officer in their local fire department. Because Elmer was away at the fire station so often, they valued and cherished their family time together. Charlene recalls with fondness their family camping trips they would take outside Miami, “I remember the kids running around, Charlene and Elmer Jansen getting ready to take a swim, while on their wedding day, 1944 we set up the tent.” Despite having eight children, the couple did manage to get away alone once, “We took a little boat off the coast of Miami, and spent a night away from the children. It was really special.” COURTESY OF THE JANSEN FAMILY

Charlene credits the couple’s ability to stick together through good times and bad as one of the keys to a long, successful marriage. The memory that stands out the most from their life together is the moment a doctor told Charlene and Elmer that their 6-year-old son had a brain tumor. They held each other tightly, and with the support of their family and friends, and their deep faith in God, they were able to get through that difficult Charlene and time. Their faith has helped them through Elmer Jansen, all the challenges they have faced, and Christmas 2014 the couple has spent time together reading the Bible over the years. During their marriage, they enjoyed long early morning walks. “We would walk for three miles and enjoy the fresh air.” These days, their greatest joy is spending time with their eight children, 14 grandchildren, and 13 great-grandchildren (with one on the way), and their 7-year-old Papillon dog, Lady. As for their son with the brain tumor: “He just celebrated his 66th birthday!” After nearly 73 years of marriage, Charlene advises the key to happiness and longevity is, “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger. In other words, never go to bed angry at each other.” COURTESY OF THE JANSEN FAMILY

Jim and Rose Fitzpatrick Mr. and Mrs. Jim and Rose Fitzpatrick met in high school in Dearborn, Michigan and married when they were both just 20 years old on July 31, 1944. “Staying in love with each other and being faithful, and [making a point] to discuss things and come to some sort of an agreement” are how they have shared over 70 years of matrimonial bliss. 38

Some of the happiest memories Jim recalls was when he was in the Navy, and Liz would visit him in the different cities he was touring through. Jim served in the Navy over a period of ten years, first in World War II and then he was called back to fight in the Korean War. Being apart during that period was difficult: “All we could do was write to each other.” (For a long time, Jim kept all the letters that Rose sent to him.) Reflecting on their life so far, they know how fortunate they have been. The most important product of that good fortune is their four children: a girl (Patricia), boy (James), girl (Maureen), boy (Terrance). Since retiring, they traveled—a lot, including trips to Hawaii, Panama City, France, and their ancestral homelands of Italy and Ireland. Rose’s family comes from Italy and when they were in Venice, they had the chance to meet some cousins. And in Ireland, the name Fitzpatrick was everywhere, much to Jim’s delight. Being an Irishman, Jim is quite the jolly fellow and finds humor in everything and everywhere, which makes Rose his perfect mate: “Rose is not only very good-looking but she has a good sense of humor and puts up with me!”

Jim and Rose Fitzpatrick on their wedding day, 1944 COURTESY OF THE FITZPATRICK FAMILY

Jim and Rose Fitzpatrick today COURTESY OF THE FITZPATRICK FAMILY

by SEAMUS MULLARKEY

t doesn’t matter whether we have a drop of Irish blood or not, once March rolls around we’re all constantly reminded of the shenanigans surrounding St. Patrick’s Day. After all, this celebration dates back many centuries to its origins in Ireland, where it’s always been the biggest, loudest party of the year, right? Well, the story of St. Patrick’s Day and its origins (like many Irish stories) is a bit more complicated than it might at first glance appear. The first thing you should know is that St. Patrick’s Day in Ireland was traditionally a quiet, church-oriented affair. On their national feast day, the typical Irish family would rise early to scavenge the damp fields to find a solitary sprig of shamrock to pin to their somber Sunday best. Then they would spend the morning in church listening to sermons about how thankful they should be that St. Patrick saved a bunch of ungrateful sinners like them. Nobody wore green as it was considered an unlucky color not suitable for church. And there wasn’t any green food in sight. Rather than spending the 40

rest of the day gallivanting around the town square tossing green beads and asking complete strangers to smooch under the shamrocks, there was a sober procession promoting civic responsibility and community values, with no drunken shenanigans whatsoever! You see, St. Patrick’s Day, Good Friday, and Christmas were the three days of the year when the pubs weren’t allowed to open. By strict legal decree, the towns and villages of Ireland were dry as a rock in the desert. People generally just gathered at home for a quiet family meal somewhat like the Thanksgiving feast, and went to bed early—presumably to dream of stern-faced bishops banishing unruly pagan snakes. The gigantic parades are an American innovation. The largest St. Patrick’s Day parade in the US takes place in New York, where the event draws an average of two million people. The first organized modern New York parade was held in 1766 when military units strode at dawn from the house of one leading Irish citizen to the next. Our nation’s second-largest St. Patrick’s Day celebration is held in Boston. The South Boston parade is probably

the nation’s oldest, first being hosted by the Charitable Irish Society of Boston all the way back in 1737. Over the years, as these parades grew in strength, they became a chance for the Irish-Americans to gather and demonstrate their combined political influence. Apart from showing that they were a force to be reckoned with, it was also a chance to blow off some steam and have “a grand old time.” In its current incarnation, the parade is about Irish heritage—with the added benefit that everyone else gets a chance to join in, jig around, and become “green” for the day. Meanwhile, all the way back in the homeland, the Irish parades have become “Americanized” in the last decade or two. Irish people now don the same kind of crazy get-ups that they do in the US. There are too many US tourist dollars at stake for them not to “Riverdance up the place!” This article was adapted from Rashers Tierney’s recently published book on Irish trivia, fun facts, and quirky “bet you didn’t know’s.” Order your copy now at www.effyouimirish.com; it’s the ideal gift for anyone with Irish heritage or those who’d enjoy the lively and inspiring tales of a feisty, fun-loving people. 41

An Exclusive Interview

Your Friend and Mine

Jeanne Phillips is Dear Abby by CHRISTINA BURNS

I consider the people who read the column to be my friends.

PHOTO: CHRIS SALATA

â&#x20AC;&#x201D; JEANNE PHILLIPS

hen Jeanne Phillips was 14 years old, her mother Pauline started a new job working for the San Francisco Chronicle. It was 1956 and she was writing an advice column for the newspaper’s readership that she called “Dear Abby,” using Abigail Van Buren as her pen name (“Abigail” inspired from the Book of Samuel in the Old Testament: “Then David said to Abigail: ‘...blessed is your advice and blessed are you...’”; “Van Buren” after US President Martin Van Buren). Her mother had her help answer some of the letters written by fellow teenagers. If Pauline approved of Jeanne’s response, she would use it. In turn, Jeanne earned her allowance and unbeknownst to her at the time, the start of her own career as a writer and advice-giver. In 2002, the Phillips family publicly announced that Pauline had Alzheimer’s disease, a condition that they kept from the public for more than a decade. The announcement made headlines: how could Pauline craft the beloved “Dear Abby” column considering her health? The truth was that Jeanne, who assisted her mother from the start, was penning the column, a responsibility she took over in 1987 with Pauline editing until her ability gradually diminished. 43

Founding “Dear Abby” columnist Pauline Phillips poses with a teenage Jeanne, along with Jeanne’s father, Morton, and brother, Edward, 1958 PHOTO: HULTON ARCHIVE/GETTY IMAGES

When Pauline died in 2013, Jeanne wrote, “I have lost my mother, my mentor, and my best friend.” Among the many causes that Jeanne dedicates herself to, none is quite as personal as her commitment to fight Alzheimer’s disease. In addition to her financial support, she travels around the country to publicly speak on behalf of the Mayo Clinic and the Alzheimer’s Association. Today, Jeanne’s “Dear Abby” column remains influential and widely read on an international scale, appearing in about 1,400 newspapers with a combined circulation of more than 110 million readers. Jeanne’s advice is sought by people of all walks of life and age groups on a wide range of topics—she receives up to 10,000 letters and e-mails each week. 44

Despite that overwhelming number of letters and emails awaiting her advice, Jeanne took the time to have this exclusive interview with PS Magazine: PS Magazine: You were a teenager when your mother first started her column in 1956. Did you always aspire to follow in her footsteps? Jeanne Phillips (JP): It didn’t evolve quite that way. I had asked for an allowance and Mother asked what I intended to do for it. We had help at home, and I always had good grades. Mother suggested that she would save some letters from teenagers. If I did a good job, she would sign them, and if she did not like them, I would have to do them over. That was how I started. Now a couple of months after I started, my mother came into my bedroom waving a paper from the teenage daughter of one [newspaper] editor who was depressed because she was overweight. I wrote her back a letter of encouragement, pretty much telling her to lay off the hamburgers and French fries and to try to get some exercise. And then I wrote, “I know you can do it, I have faith in you.” About six weeks later, the editor told Mother that his daughter had followed the advice and was no longer depressed. That’s when I knew how powerful a letter could be. That’s a tremendous feeling of power for a teenager. PS: What do you think is the best advice you ever received from your mother? JP: My mother and I were very close. I spent most of my life working on the column, as her editor and then she would edit me. My mother and I were collaborators. I received her advice in the course of conversations. You get your values very much on modeling what you see your parents do. And my mother always encouraged me to be honest. My mother encouraged me to be kind. PS: “Dear Abby” is a defining part of the zeitgeist. How has the column changed since the mid-1950s? 45

JP: “Dear Abby” has always been everyone’s friend. Yes, things have changed. People are much more open. Subjects that weren’t open in the ’50s are much more discussed now. PS: How would you characterize your “Dear Abby” voice? JP: Today, people seem to be much more serious and expect advice that is direct and to the point. I just try to answer the question. I am not a judge. What I am is a caring best friend. My readers tell me everything and I do read everything. I give them the advice that you would receive from a friend. PS: Do you read through each letter and email? How do you select which ones you’ll answer? JP: Every letter that comes to me is read. It’s my contract with the readers, in a way. They are then organized and sorted for me. At that point, I decide which letters I want to publish. The purpose is to enlighten, entertain, and educate. If something interests me, it will interest other people. If someone is in serious trouble, I pick up the phone and call them. That’s what friends do when someone is in trouble. I try to get them help on a local level. It isn’t just tossing off answers in a column, there’s more to it than that. PS: Your mother helped to promote the Alzheimer’s Association in 1980 when she answered a letter from “Desperate in New York,” whose husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Since that letter was published, she is credited for helping to raise awareness and funding for research to find a cure. Based on your own experience and the amount of awareness now, what’s your advice to someone with a parent or spouse recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s? JP: Yes, that letter put the organization on the map. I would say: “It’s very important for you to realize that as much as you want to protect your loved one, you’re going to need help. That’s why it’s important that you 46

contact the Alzheimer’s Association because they have support groups for caregivers to gain coping skills for dealing with their loved one. Have the family member evaluated so you know what you’re dealing with. And, have a designated person to speak on their behalf, in addition to having an advance directive.” PS: You have received many awards in raising awareness on different topics, and in March you will be honored at the Great Minds Gala for your leadership in raising public awareness around Alzheimer’s “Dear Abby” Author Jeanne Phillips disease and dementia. Your support of Alzheimer’s research includes giving a generous $10 million grant to the Mayo Clinic to build the Abigail Van Buren Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center. Do you find that more people who are struggling with Alzheimer’s disease are reaching out to you now that you have become a champion of fighting it? PHOTO: AP PHOTO/DAMIAN DOVARGANES

JP: Anytime that I put something about Alzheimer’s in the column, I hear from people. I hear from their families. I hear from the daughters, the husbands, the wives… and those are the people that I try to guide. Because they need it. The Alzheimer’s Association support groups give people coping skills to manage their loved ones. And it’s also a place where people can safely vent and say things, and hear things. And understand that their feelings are normal. PS: In 1991, The St. Louis Post-Dispatch ran the article, “At 72, ‘Dear Abby’ Says Retirement Is A Dirty Word.” Can you imagine a day when you’ll retire as Dear Abby? JP: The column isn’t going anywhere. I’m in great health, both physically and mentally. There’s an old song, “Our Love is Here to Stay.” And so am I! 48

Jeanne Phillips is part of the Alzheimer’s Association Celebrity Champion awareness campaign COURTESY ALZHEIMER’S ASSOCIATION

BOOKS

DEAD WAKE: THE LAST CROSSING OF THE LUSITANIA

his May marks the 100th anniversary of the sinking of RMS Lusitania, torpedoed by a German submarine in the Irish Sea within a day of making port. It was a wartime tragedy measured by the cost of civilian lives, some 1,198 men, women, and children who had boarded in New York. The sinking of Lusitania propelled the US, under President Wilson, to enter WWI because of the aggression displayed toward innocent civilians, for no act of war like it had been precipitated before. Erik Larson’s Dead Wake: The Last Crossing of the Lusitania (Crown) is a page-turner of an account based on detailed research. Mr. Larson engages the reader with portrayals of individuals enveloped in descriptions of the events up to

the ocean liner’s destruction at the hands of Captain Schwieger of the German U-20, the sinking of the ship, and the immediate aftermath. Woven in the historical narrative, we meet a handful of passengers, some who survived and some who perished, described in vivid color. Indeed color is a major player in this book, which captures the sobriety of gray ocean fog, the crystal blue-green of the sea, the stately white walls, shining wood, rich carpets, and gilded plaster of the ship itself; and very strikingly, the bright clothing worn by travelers in their cheery attire, even covering those whose bodies were laid out for identification. Mr. Larson’s story is captivating and well told. 49

Illustrated by Mike Moran

Willowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s friends built a brand-new tree house. She canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wait to climb aboard! Can you help Willow find the one path across her neighborhood that will take her there? Answer on page 61

Illustrated by Chuck Dillon

Start

Finish

The names of 15 flowers are hidden in the letters. Some names are across. Others are up and down. We found MARIGOLD. Can you find the rest? Answer on page 61 Word List AZALEA BLUEBELL CARNATION CROCUS DAFFODIL DAISY IRIS MARIGOLD ORCHID POPPY ROSE SUNFLOWER TULIP VIOLET ZINNIA

S U N F L O W E R Q D A I S Y T U L I P A Z I N N I A X Q O F A O R C H I D J P F L V I O L E T X P O E X Q J R O S E Y D A B L U E B E L L I R I S C R O C U S L X M A R I G O L D C A R N A T I O N J

Answer on page 61

Illustrated by Jamie Smith

FUN & GA MES

Solutions on page 63

CROSSWORD PUZZLE 1

ACROSS 4. Treasury Department bureau (inits) (3) 7. Become popular (5,2) 8. Metal food container (3) 9. Cheeky devil (3) 10. Fuss (7) 12. Poison (5) 14. Solo (5) 16. Mediterranean island (7) 19. All the details: ___ and outs (3) 20. Dissenting vote (3) 21. Small discussion group (7) 22. Ready (3) 54

DOWN 1. Attainment (11) 2. Intervene (4,2) 3. Repeating sound pattern (6) 4. Captivated by (4) 5. Crust covering a wound (4) 6. Surplus to requirements (11) 11. Web address (inits) (3) 13. Lennon’s wife (3) 14. Warnings (6) 15. The East (6) 17. Happinesses (4) 18. Take a break (4)

WORD SEARCH: CAPITAL CITIES Capital Cities

T G D G L N T B S I N U P K I

O L X R H P U U O U L A A T A

C S B L D O S B U Y L L A V R

D O E U C A N D H A S O A A D

ADDIS ABABA ADDIS ABABA BANGKOK BANGKOK BERNE BERNE BRUSSELS BRUSSELS BUDAPEST BUDAPEST CANBERRA COPENHAGEN CANBERRA DUBLIN COPENHAGEN DUBLIN

N N P X L L C L B I N D S W A

O I S E A I N A D R D N L D S

T Y L M N O T G N I L L E W L

G C K B P H K S S B A A S I N

N S E O U L A A E O E O S R V

I S A U T D B G R P L R U N S

H A A R C A K A E W A S R A W

S W R G B S U K A N I D B A I

A U B A N G K O K X R M U N M

W I K I E I A A B I S E C B T

N O M U O N R A Y W K W B B H

LUXEMBOURG LUXEMBOURG MINSK MINSK SEOUL SEOUL TOKYO TOKYO VIENNA WARSAW VIENNA WASHINGTON DC WARSAW WELLINGTON WASHINGTON DC WELLINGTON 55

FUN & GA MES

Solutions on page 63

SUDOKU Sudokuâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;also known as Number Placeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is a logicbased, combinatorial numberplacement puzzle. The aim of Sudoku is to enter a number from 1 through 9 in each cell of a grid. Each row, column, and region must contain only one instance of each number.

LETTER SOUP Can you rearrange the floating letters below to spell out the names of various Winter Olympic events? Each letter should be used exactly once in the resulting set. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 56

2 3

7 4

3 8

6 3 6 5 9 2 4 7 5 8 4 2 1 9 1 3 7 8 7 1 9 5 1 3 8 2

MARCH/APRIL 2015 HOROSCOPES by Chris Flisher

ARIES (March 21–April 19) If things have been quiet during the last few months, strap yourself in and get ready for an exciting ride. Your ruling planet Mars will be joining the Sun and Uranus in Aries and that may spell out unexpected shifts and heightened intellectual activity. This bold combination will be further climaxed by a series of eclipses that may bring about the most enlightening news. With a lot to look forward to, you may feel as if your long wait has finally come to an end. A solar eclipse on the same day as the Vernal Equinox may be like a burst of enthusiastic energy that heralds a bold new year for you. TAURUS (April 20–May 20) You may be witnessing shifts in your daily life as plans that you put in place a while back begin to come to fruition. Your slow methodical approach may be that of diligence and resolve

but the end results may have been worth the wait. As the saying goes, the slow and steady pace often delivers the longawaited victory. Your patience and perseverance may begin to show signs of paying off during this period. With that in mind you may also be on the brink of a new beginning that shines a light on your world in the most auspicious ways. GEMINI (May 21–June 21) Your time during this period may be taken up by group projects and the like. Community projects may be particularly engaging and fun-filled especially if you are able to present new and unusual plans for everyone. Areas of special interest may include presentations, theatrical displays, and other forms of mass communication, especially if they are lighthearted. You may encourage your group to write a good old-fashioned, hand-written 57

letter to a popular friend. Although you may enjoy the repartee of the team, you may also see the need for focusing on your partner and those closest to you. CANCER (June 22–July 22) This should be a good period to focus on your leisure activities. The time may be right to simply return to projects that engaged you a while back and reignite them. A hobby or pursuit that you began with earnest may be kindling your curiosity once again. And why not? If you can find the funds and the friends to help, you may be quite pleased with the outcome. Like an old friend that stops by for a visit, a revived project may provide you with the same kind of emotional boost. You may also hear news of something intriguing coming from your family. LEO (July 23–Aug. 22) This should be a rather exciting time if you are traveling. With that in mind, expect the unexpected and jump in with complete enthusiasm. With Jupiter in Leo, you can be certain there is an abundance of 58

bold creativity to be found once you step into a new world of discovery. Travel and education are the two areas where you may see the greatest opportunity to uncover hidden gems, but also re-live past experiences in a new manner. You are never too old to learn something new and when you enter into any of these arenas you may be surprised by how fulfilled you become. VIRGO (Aug. 23–Sept. 22) You may find that your greatest inspiration comes in the form of a deeper look at yourself and your heritage. It may only be that you truly come to understand yourself when you glance backwards at where you have been. This may be a wonderful new beginning that had perhaps eluded you prior to this time and, yet, may have been there all along. You may experience spiritual epiphanies that urge you towards a deeper understanding as they draw you closer to your own genealogy. You may appreciate that you have come full circle.

LIBRA (Sept. 23–Oct. 22) Just about every relationship you have may be pulling surprises on you during this time. Whether the closest people in your life burst out in song or pull a rabbit out of their hats, be prepared for the unexpected. With this much potential for excitement, you may find it hard to cope with all of the activity. Expect conversations and ideas to be flying around the room with electric urgency. This unique and particular kind of energy may bode well for fun and frivolity of the most eccentric kind. This could be memorable. SCORPIO (Oct. 23–Nov. 21) You may have been asking for a change in your daily routine over the last several months either out of necessity or out of boredom. Well, you may have gotten your wish and then some. You may soon find that your daily schedule is anything but boring or necessary and yet you may have no choice but to jump in and handle it. You may see lots of unexpected changes in a routine that you once thought was

tedious. Still, you may welcome the changes and feel a surge of electrical excitement as the daily grind becomes entertainment today. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22–Dec. 21) Prepare for a surge of creative activity over the coming period. This may be the type of fun that comes along every so often but leaves an indelible imprint on your memory. Like a child with a complex new toy, you may find this to be exhilarating and challenging at the same time. You may be intrigued by learning something new and completely different, and therein lies the challenge. As fascinating and alluring as you may feel, you may also be tested to try and find a novel solution. With that in mind, you may feel equal parts jubilation and intensity. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22–Jan. 19) Expect to witness new and unusual shifts in your primary residence. You may be looking at different living arrangements or 59

a possible new family member may be on the way. Excitement and expansion may be on your horizon with this planetary theme on tap. You may also be quite willing to put in any extra effort to make things happen there. That good, old, reliable Capricornian nature of yours has all the right values to get the job done. Another area worthy of note involves your roots, and siblings may contact you to research an estate topic or other legal investigation. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20–Feb. 18) Unusual communications may fill up your inbox, but not to worry since this may be expected. Look for surprising text messages, letters, and phone calls throughout this period. The same theme exists in all forms of research as well. If you are investigating a topic, you may very well be surprised by what you find. Such discoveries can open a whole new vista of possibilities so approach this cosmic temperament with intrigue and wonder. Correspondences can be quite revelatory and profound, which 60

can add to the allure of what might be landing in your mailbox. You may also be quite pro-active during this span so don’t be afraid to express yourself. PISCES (Feb. 19–March 20) Be mindful of financial surprises. This may be where your ability to research and think big comes in quite handy. You may need to take the long view and see what plans you can put in place that will deliver further down the road. If you come across a sudden windfall, be cautious about how you handle it. Your best option may be a financial instrument that comes to your aid for a long time rather than a hasty flash in the pan. Do your research and aim for the best approach. That may mean stepping out of your comfort zone, but the novel pay-off may be worth it. © 2015 Chris Flisher

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WILLIAM STEIG, THE NEW YORKER COLLECTION/THE CARTOON BANK

THE L AST L AUGH

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