Agnes’s exciting day out

by Carol Waterkeyn

Agnes climbed carefully off the bus. Her handbag was heavy today. She was on her way to her bank to deposit bags of small change she had collected over the last year.

Agnes wanted to exchange them for notes, so she could buy herself and granddaughter Poppy a deluxe afternoon tea later at The Palms Hotel. Their table was booked for twothirty.

On entering the bank, she joined the queue, but there seemed to be rather a commotion. A man with a black facemask was waving a gun towards the cashier.

“Hand over the money,” he yelled, “or this woman gets it.”

The young cashier looked terrified.

“And you lot get back,” he shouted to Agnes and the three others queuing, “And no funny business. Everyone put their phones on the floor now!”

Agnes shuffled towards the man. “Scuse me, I don’t have a mobile phone.”

“Give me your bag then,” he said angrily.

“I’d rather not,” said Agnes indignantly.

“Give me the bag!”

He went to snatch it, but Agnes swung it with all her might, engaging with his head and knocking him clean out. He went down like a skittle at a bowling alley, the gun dropped to the floor, and Agnes kicked it away.

Everyone cheered. The young cashier pressed the alarm button under her desk and a customer retrieved his mobile phone and called the emergency services.

And then, what she had done hit her. Agnes sat down. She took out her handkerchief and dabbed her forehead. “Oh, my goodness,” she said.

One of the staff checked the assailant was breathing, then fetched some tape and wound it around his hands and ankles.

The assistant manager approached Agnes. “Are you alright?”

“I think so.”

“It was a brave thing to do. Why were you here?”

Agnes opened her handbag and showed her bags of coins.

“I wanted to change these.”

“How fortuitous you chose today. I’ll just go and sort that money for you. Is there anything else I can do?”

“Could you ring my granddaughter? She’ll be waiting for me at The Palms Hotel.” Agnes handed over Poppy’s number.

“Of course.”

“Tell her to start without me and save me some banana cake.”

“Certainly. I’ll be back shortly.”

The police arrived and arrested the man who was now conscious and moaning loudly. He was taken by an officer in an ambulance to have his head examined.

A police constable took Agnes’s details and said she would call in later to take her statement.

Agnes stood up and walked towards the hotel clutching her much lighter handbag.

Poppy stood up to greet her as she arrived.

“Are you okay, Grandma? The lady from the bank explained things. She said you were a hero.”

Agnes smiled. “Actually, it was the most exciting thing that has happened to me for a long time. Just think what the ladies of the WI will say when I tell them!”

Poppy grinned and waved to the waiter. “I’ve ordered our tea, but we are ready for our Prosecco now please.”

“Here’s to you my brave Grandma.” Poppy raised her glass, “Now tell me all about it…”