MamaMag Dec/Jan 2022

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WIN 1 OF 3 FEMINAÈ BEVERAGE CO. PARTY PACKS Summer sorted Adele Barbaro Be kind to the ocean Ciao Kate Langbroek Dinner with Adam Liaw

free “The truth is, kids don’t give a shit what you look like. They just care that you played with them.”

Adele Barbaro

Support and fun for the everyday mum 1

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SUMMER LOVING You’d be forgiven for thinking it’s still only October, this year has flown so much, but alas Christmas will be upon us in a matter of weeks. They say times flies when you’re having fun, but that’s not exactly how I would describe this year. Endless lockdowns (I live in Melbourne, sigh) were not fun at all and have once again hampered schooling, sports, business and leisure, not to mention my ability to go to the pub! But now Summer is here, another COVID-year is over, and life seems to be finally getting back to semi-normal now that most of us are vaccinated.

So it’s time to get back out and about. Mama’s been lucky enough to be back on the movie-preview-screening invite list and there are so many goodies coming out this Summer. We loved Clifford The Big Red Dog, completely adorable, and we’ll be checking out Sing 2 this weekend.

So that’s it. The end of the 7th year of MamaMag. COVID was a curse and a blessing. Taking things digital has given us the opportunity to expand into other states and I’m excited to announce that 2022 will see the launch of Brisbane, Adelaide, Perth and Tassie mags to complement our Sydney and Melbourne titles, PLUS we have an exciting new digital discovery platform launching too.

So make sure you’re signed up to our newsletter to be the first in the know. Until next time, let the fun be GIN!!

Sarah Cavalier and fun for the everyday mum Editor - MamaMagSupport - @thecavaliermama MamaMag is designed and published bi-monthly free for Australian mums, families and carers.

Publisher: Grizzle Design Pty Ltd. ABN: 26 042 138 550.

PO Box 8018, North Road LPO, Brighton East VIC 3187 Phone: 1300 771 446 Email: info@mamamag.com.au www.mamamag.com.au | www.grizzledesign.com.au Editor in Chief/Creative Director: Sarah Cavalier: sarah@mamamag.com.au For advertising enquiries contact: Olivia Wilson: olivia@mamamag.com.au Want to write for us or have an article idea? submissions@mamamag.com.au

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Support and fun for the everyday mum

MamaMag give thanks to our 2021 Proud Partners

Support and fun for the everyday mum

Support and fun for the everyday mum

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CONTENTS Adele keeps it real

6

We chat to Adele Barbaro

A cleaner Australia

8

1 of 3

Tango Energy leading the way

Be kind to the ocean

10

Eco-friendly beach habits

Ciao Bella

12

Kate Langbroek’s new book

Hold my hand

14

Road safety this Summer

On the shelf

16

Latest release books to shop

Summer sorted

20

Sunscreen tips and faves

What’s for dinner tonight?

22

Cooking with Adam Liaw

Holiday fun

27

Great ideas by Story House Early Learning

Beach babes

party packs! worth over

$300 each

28

The Summer’s must haves

Boobs, rags and Judy Blume

30

Growing up in Australia

What’s next for Yr 12s?

34

Year 13?

Drowning 36 The silent killer

An ethical Christmas

38

Top 5 tips

Abbie does it her way

40

Sydney’s first 11yo magazine editor

How to teach kids diversity

42

The importance of understanding

WIN Clifford movie tickets

43

Colour in to win!

Summer sensations

44

Keeping cool with frozen fruit

Dear new COVID mum

46

Did you have a baby this year?

The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publishing staff. Reproduction in whole or part is prohibited without permission of the publishers. Health related articles are designed to be informative and educational. They are not intended to provide specific medical advice or replace one-on-one advice from your health practitioner.

Some featured books contain affiliate links. If you purchase using these links there is no extra cost to you but MamaMag earn a small commission that helps us continue to provide MamaMag as a FREE resource to you.

MamaMag Dec/Jan 22

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Total prize value $938.70. Visit www.mamamag.com.au/competitions for full terms and conditions.

For your chance to win enter at www.mamamag.com.au/feminae

5

ADELE KEEPS IT REAL Adele Barbaro, a.k.a. the original ‘Real Mumma’, truly is the real deal. In a sea of influencers and mummy bloggers making parenting look all shiny and perfect, Adele is the raw, vulnerable and honest version showing us the good, bad and ugly moments. If you’re looking for a real and raw insight into parenthood, combined with an equally savvy entrepreneurship, then look no further than Adele Barbaro.

Hey Adele! First up, tell us a bit about your gorgeous little family.

I’m a Melbourne mama, although originally born in NSW. I was travelling in Europe when I met Paul and moved here to be with him with just a suitcase to my name. 10 years later, we have 6-year-old Harvey, who was conceived with the help of IVF and 4-year-old Chloe, who was an amazing surprise.

When did you start blogging and how did you end up here!?

After we got married, we struggled to conceive naturally due to endometriosis and significant scarring on my endometrium which led us to explore IVF. We were one of the lucky ones and it was a success. As the pregnancy came to full term, I had to be induced as the amniotic fluid around Harvey was minimal and when that happened, I didn’t progress and ended up having an emergency caesarean. I felt like I failed to conceive, deliver and then when I got home, I struggled to settle Harvey and breastfeed. I felt like a big failure but I was too brave to ask for help. I just kept pushing through but when he was about 4 months old, I broke.

I went to a mother and baby unit for some help with sleep and feeding, and although I felt like I had failed yet again, it was the best thing I ever did and I wanted to shout from the rooftops about it.

Although my blog started as just a diary, mainly for my interstate family, I hated seeing things on social media that portrayed motherhood to be this blissful walk in the park, when in my world, it was the opposite. I decided to share a real insight into motherhood. And so the blog began.

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In 2018 you started a wine brand called Mama Wine Co that has now morphed into Feminaè Beverage Co. with wine, gin, cocktails and more. Was it hard cracking into this industry?

I was a working mum and I had a great job as PA to Janine Allis (founder of Boost Juice) when I said to Paul, I wanted more. I wanted my own business and to have greater flexibility around being a mum. I had lots of ideas, but nothing stacked up. I didn’t rush into something without doing research and waited for find a concept that worked and I was passionate about.

One day I had a dinner party and the guests talked about the ‘legs’ on the wine and how well it paired with the prosciutto. I remember turning to my friend as saying “I wish there were a fine wine that paired well with the two weeks of washing I had to do.” And this is where Mama Wine Co was born. Good wine with tongue in cheek, fun labels about motherhood. And it was so well received. We had ‘One of those days’, Rose, ‘The Washing Can Wait’ Pinot Grigio, among others.

But over the next year, I realised I was more than a mama and I wanted the brand to be inclusive of all women. I wanted to expand into the spirit and cocktail category and after much thought, rebranded to Feminaé Beverage Co. ‘Feminaé’ is Latin for ‘women’ and I wanted it to be a brand that was a cheers to all women.

Since then, I have collaborated with some amazing women like Abbie Chatfield, Ash London and DJ Havana Brown to create bespoke drops, while also releasing exclusive Feminaè cocktails and gin.

Your latest is the new Infamous X Feminaè by Adele Barbaro swimwear. Tell us more...

I have worn Infamous Swim for years and have become great friends with Gemma, the founder.

I told her I had a vision of a swimwear range for women like me. Those who want a quality, lux swimsuit while still being able to go down the waterslide with the kids and not get to the bottom with their bum or boobs out. They are supportive, flattering, sexy and yet, have full bum cover!

Infamous Swim is all about body confidence. What’s some advice for mums worried about getting into a swimsuit this Summer?

I have sat on the sidelines often and regretted it, so I don’t anymore. The truth is, kids don’t give a shit what you look like. They just care that you played with them. They will remember mum jumping in the waves and building sandcastles, not the cellulite.

What does a typical day look like for Adele Barbaro?

Jam packed. Starting my businesses has allowed me to have dedicated days with Chloe before she starts school, to be there for school pick up for Harvey and to volunteer with school activities.

But on the flip side, you will see me working until midnight when the kids go to bed. I work more hours than I did in my last job, but they are when they suit me and this time with the kids is invaluable.

What’s the most embarrassing thing that you’ve encountered as a mum?

Probably when Harvey asked where babies come out of, on a packed train. I whispered to him that they usually come out a vagina, trying to speak softly and change the topic quickly. He exclaimed at the top of his voice “No they don’t! They would get hair all over them!” Mortified.

Follow along with Adele online at feminaebeverageco.com.au and infamousswim.com.au @adelebarbaro

Get more from mama - www.mamamag.com.au | Get social with mama - @localmamamag

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A CLEANER AUSTRALIA Australia’s international reputation has taken a battering as nations left the recent COP26 summit with a renewed sense of urgency to act on climate change this decade. The negotiations place enormous pressure on Australia to step up its efforts during the critical years ahead.

As the retail component of Pacific Hydro Australia, Tango Energy are linked to one of Australia’s leading players within the renewable energy sector. As one of the very few providers in the energy market to have the backing of a 100 percent renewable energy generator, Tango Energy occupy a somewhat unique position, giving them an edge over competitors.

“Our purpose drives everything we do - Inspire. Empower.

Leave the world a better place.”

Domenic Capomolla, Melbourne dad and CEO of Tango Energy.

Pride in project At present, Australia’s renewable energy sector is equally defined by both excitement and adversity. The Australian retail energy market is a combination of national frameworks and local/state jurisdictional markets. Each state has its own requirements and technicalities, despite being part of the National Electricity Market.

While the sector may represent fertile ground for energy start-ups, Tango Energy CEO Domenic Capomolla finds that market reregulation, including default price caps and limited sales and marketing activity contribute to a challenging market environment.

Supporting Australians As a proud local employer, Tango Energy are dedicated to providing employment opportunities for our community within their locally-based customer service team.

Subsequently, the company strives to motivate employees and encourage their contribution.

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Additional to this, Tango Energy adopts a supportive role amongst the community through their participation in charitable initiatives, as evidenced by the 2020 launch of the ‘Community Committee.’

“We launched the committee after feedback from our staff engagement survey,” Capomolla explains. “ The focus of the committee is to give back to communities, either as a cash donation, staff volunteer time or both. The primary focus areas are charities or groups that assist animals, children or vulnerable women’s groups.

Looking ahead Looking to the coming years Tango Energy intend to continue expanding their footprint across Australia.

They recently expanded to sell gas in Victoria, and have expanded electricity into Queensland, South Australia and NSW. “Our expansion plans are ambitious, but the team is certainly up for it,” quips Domenic confidently.

Complimentary to this geographical agenda, Tango Energy will continue to innovate towards Smart Energy, with the price point of its customers at the forefront of the agenda.

Tango Energy are also building their Smart Energy business, offering rooftop solar, battery storage, and smart energy devices. This will expand into community batteries, community energy sharing and Virtual Power Plants (VPP).

Through this scheme, customers will be able to start making money, by selling their excess power back to the grid.

Pacific Hydro are dedicated to developing renewable energy assets right here in Australia.

That means by supporting Tango, you are supporting their mission of leading Aussies to an affordable, clean energy future, because good planets are hard to find.

Find out more at tangoenergy.com.au

Sleep like a baby with Tango’s low cost energy plans.

Visit Tangoenergy.com or call 1800 861 952 to see how much you could save!

Be kInd to the ocean We all love a day out by the ocean, especially now we’ve got kids, right? I don’t know about you, but ever since having my daughter, Lila, I’ve also been way more aware of the impact those family days out can have.

A simple day at the beach now comes with way more stuff: way more toys, way more sun creams and WAY more snacks! And then I hear stats like ‘by 2050 our oceans will contain more plastic than fish’ and I feel all kinds of guilty: that’s not an ocean I want her to inherit when she grows up.

I get it, there are enough things to remember to pack and to worry about when enjoying a beautiful day out by the waves. So without adding dramas or complicated routines, how can we be just a little more sustainable, adopting some quick and easy green swaps and ecofriendly habits next time we visit the beach?

Pick up your rubbish.... and three bits extra!

I’m sure you’re all over part one.... leaving even just a chip bag, or plastic bottle can have way worse an effect on marine life than we think.

Turtles mistake plastic bags for jellyfish, and they do not make for a healthy, nutritious lunch, and much worse can result in serious damage.

But did you think about part two? We’re proud to support an incredible Aussie initiative called Take 3 for the Sea. The idea is dead simple... each time you visit the beach, pick up 3 bits of rubbish you see, even if they’re just little scraps of plastic. Get the kids involved, make it a race, make it a game or make it a competition as to who can get the most... you’d be amazed at the impact if everyone simply took 3 for the sea!

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Go easy on the cheap, plastic toys Digging, scooping, making sandcastles... it’s half of the fun! And since so many toys get broken, lost or ‘borrowed’ by other beach goers, it can be tempting to go cheap, break and buy often.

But it’s definitely a false economy... especially when it comes to the sea! Consider buying beach toys made from more eco-friendly materials like silicone, or even recycled plastic.

They may cost a bit more but they’re often made to be better quality and durability to compensate for the higher cost.

Use reef-safe sunscreen It is estimated that 14,000 tons of sunscreen end up in the oceans each year. And this doesn’t just come from the sunscreen washed directly off in the sea. The sunscreen that you rinse down the drain when you shower can eventually find its way into the ocean. In addition, aerosol sprays can spread sunscreen particles across the sand. When the tide comes in, these chemicals can get washed out to sea.

Without getting into too much of a science lesson, there are physical (mineral) sunscreens and chemical sunscreens. It’s chemical sunscreens that are most often a problem, as some of the main chemicals used in sunscreens are harmful to corals and other marine life. The worst culprit is Oxybenzone (Benzophenone-3), but many of these chemicals can lead to coral bleaching and cause other damage and abnormalities to our reef eco-systems.

But never fear, reef-safe sunscreen is a thing, and many of them are certified safe for kids aged 6 months +. Some of the Aussie brands we love include Little Urchin, Sun Butter, and Baby Bum. Or look for sunscreens that are ‘reeffriendly’ or have the ‘reef-safe’ symbol on them.

Be gentle with the ocean’s little treasures Exploring rock pools, picking up shells and collecting crabs has got to be one of the most wonderful innocent childhood pleasures of the beach. But as most parents can attest, clumsy little fingers are not always the gentlest! The coastal eco-systems are really delicate, and there’s really no way of telling if that anemone you poke, or hermit crab you move, is going to be OK. Encouraging your little ones to look, but not touch, is always the best rule of thumb.

Shop ocean-friendly brands In Australia we have a special relationship with the ocean. Enjoying a day out at the beach seems to be a national pastime! So thankfully there are so many smart entrepreneurs who have created brands that allow us to have a positive ocean impact. Seek out Australian owned brands that are making things that are reef-safe, made of recycled ocean plastic, give a percentage back to the oceans and more.

Have fun teaching your little ones to love and respect the ocean A day at the ocean should be lots of fun for everyone! And there are so many things you can do that only add to the fun but create a fun ocean education or conservation lesson as an added bonus! Take a home-made creature identification board when you visit the rock pools, make a game out of ‘Taking 3 for the Sea’ or see who can spot the most beautiful and colourful shell. Our little ones are such (sea) sponges at this age, and when we teach them young to love and respect the ocean, the more likely they are to take care of it when they grow up. And that’s almost the greatest legacy we can leave for the next generation of water babies, both above and below the waves.

By Jessica Page, Founder of Little Fishy and plastic-frustrated, ocean-loving new mum. Little Fishy swimwear and toys are designed from the outset to be as ‘ocean-friendly’ as possible with fabric manufactured from recycled plastic bottles.

10% of profits go to an incredible organisation called Take 3 for the Sea who organise ocean clean ups and educate Aussie kids about plastic pollution and ocean conservation. www.littlefishyswim.com.au

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CIAO BELLA There is a lot of talk in this world about making dreams come true.

Dare to dream, we are told. Chase your dreams. If you can dream it, you can do it.

Well, in 2016 I had a dream. My dream, shared so fully and immediately with my husband Peter Lewis that neither of us can remember the moment we actually formulated it, was to live in Italy for a year. For us it meant a circuit breaker; an adventure; a chance to spend more time with our four children – Lewis, Sunday, Artie and Jannie – in a country we had been swept away by since our first visit in 2015.

But all dreams dissolve in waking hours and when uttered aloud in the stark light of day suddenly seem like madness. We didn’t speak Italian. We knew no one in Italy; in fact, we had only been in the country for a few weeks on rose-tinted, aperol-spritz-toasting, basil scented holidays. My parents hated the idea. I also had the best job in the world: hosting a top-rating afternoon drive radio show with my friend and colleague of eighteen years, Dave Hughes – in Australia. Not in Italy. As for the children, by the time we planned to leave on our grand adventure, two of them – Lewis and Sunday – would be teenagers, reluctant to uproot their lives, and leave all they knew.

So what we swiftly discovered was this: the world doesn’t necessarily share your dream.

This is the story of an Australian family making their way across the world to a foreign land, trying to find an apartment, a car, a supermarket, a basketball team, a school, a cafe that would serve them a cappuccino after 11 am (no milka after morning!) and – hopefully – their place in a foreign place.

And it is also the story of our sixteen-yearold son, Lewis Lewis. The boy who lived. The child who at six was diagnosed with childhood leukaemia and survived – and who, because of this, was the unwitting motivation behind 12

our bold move.

The deep irony is that, though we wanted to seize life because he nearly lost his, he would rather not be in Italy.

It is about the day-to-day of Italian life, trying to learn a new language and make new friends, and what you discover about yourself when you are a stranger in a strange land.

It is about stepping up and falling down. On cobblestones. It is about the Australian spirit – about wearing thongs as footwear and leaving the swimming pool with wet hair and laughing when many would weep. It is about fear and courage; about having a dream and living it.

Mostly, it is about love.

It is no great revelation that certain countries or cities can become shorthand for a feeling; that their very name becomes one with an ethos or experience. Hawaii. Thailand. New York. The name of the place automatically conjures a mental picture. So much so that when you say you are going there others immediately intuit what sort of holiday or experience you will have.

Hawaii, for instance, is cocktails in tiki bars and old dudes doing the shaka, surfing on longboards, garlands of leis, Elvis Presley movies, volcanic rock and swimming with giant turtles. In Thailand you will float in aquamarine waters, eat green curry, drink fresh mango juice, tuk-tuk to markets and marvel at strange foods and maybe wash an elephant in a village stream. New York is the subway and musicals and eccentricity on the streets. It is The Met and ‘Empire State of Mind’ and Sex and the City (hopefully not the lamentable second movie) in a glittering, tumbling, urban frontloader.

Of course, this is not necessarily the case. You could be in any of these places working as a nurse or a builder covered in limestone and dust. You may be a free-running, teetotalling instafluencer who consumes their surrounds for likes. You may spend the day in a funk, weeping in your fourth- floor, red-brick, freeway-facing apartment.

Just as we don’t know the inner workings of each other’s lives, so it is with a foreign country.

We have no idea of the way in which it will open up to us, and us to it. And yet we think we do.

Few places on earth, it seems, conjure up more of an emotional response than Italy. It is a land that transcends cliché by simply piling on more of them: afternoon slumbers and wine, church bells and saints, terracotta coloured villas and washing hanging over balconies, grapevines and pasta, and glittering seas and venerated old people.

It is cobbled thoroughfares and picture-book villages, Pinocchio and families in the piazza, sliced meats and summer fruits, and music on the streets and romance. It is golden light caressing – not just the ancient stone buildings upon which it alights but also those blessed to bask in its rays. Falling in love with a country is like falling in love with a person. You are initially tentative. You start off with a few dates. With a country drive; with dinner. If that goes well, you return for more. Magical outings in which it feels everything is brushed with possibility.

Suddenly, your heart is singing. You have never looked better. You feel alive – like your true, unfettered self. You are open and happy and free. You laugh. You see things differently.

Mostly, falling in love is not so much about the reality of the other person as it is about how they make you feel about yourself.

Photograph © Tina Smigielski

I wasn’t looking to fall in love with Italy.

I wasn’t expecting it. It just happened.

This is an edited extract from, Kate Langbroek’s new book ‘Ciao Bella! Six Take Italy,’ published

by Simon & Schuster Australia. RRP $32.99.

Kate’s deliciously funny, irreverent and inspiring memoir about moving to Bologna, Italy with her family to seek la dolce vita is a glorious reminder of what we can learn from the Italians about living life to the full – and what really matters when the world goes to hell in a handbasket.

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HOLD MY HAND It’s a balmy summer evening on NSW’s Central Coast. The day’s scorching heat still hangs in the air while the persistent hum of cicadas provide the soundtrack reminiscent of Australian summer. It is 5.55pm and the McLaughlin family are bundling their three young children down to the beach. By 6pm, their lives would be forever changed.

It is almost eight years since this life-changing night on January 6 in 2014 when four year old Tom McLaughlin, bubbling with excitement to ride his new surfboard, and in an unfamiliar environment, stepped unexpectedly from the grassy verge and into the path of an oncoming 4WD. Road trauma is still the most common cause of death for Australian children1, having taken the lives of 430 innocent children just like Tom since 2014.

Since 2014, Tom’s mother Michelle McLaughlin, Founder and CEO of Little Blue Dinosaur Foundation, has been on a mission to change this tragic statistic. She has facilitated the installation of signs in 63 Local Government Areas around Australia, reminding millions of holidaymakers and locals to hold their child’s hand, and slow down.

Little Blue Dinosaur Foundation champions pedestrian road safety for children, educating the wider community around how to keep children safe around roads.

Recalling the paralysing early days following Tom’s passing, Michelle is now looking to expand the remit of the Little Blue Dinosaur Foundation to support grieving families in that particularly difficult first year.

Michelle is establishing special Road Trauma Grief Support Packages for families who suffer the unimaginable tragedy of losing a child to road trauma. She is calling on corporate sponsors and philanthropists to help Little Blue 14

Dinosaur Foundation raise $150,000 to fund the 12-month long care packages, each containing vouchers for child care, cleaning, domestic, and cooking services - filling a gap felt firsthand by Michelle.

“The first year after Tom’s death was the most difficult. I just couldn’t function. You are relying on extended family and friends to help with the day-to-day of keeping the household going - but not everybody has such support.”

The death of a child is considered the worst stressor a person can go through. Studies have found that bereaved parents, particularly mothers, are at an increased risk of depression, anxiety, PTSD, C-PTSD (Complex PTSD), suicide, panic disorders, substance abuse, immune and cardiovascular disease as well as cancers2.

“My hope with launching the Road Trauma Grief Service Packages is to make walking that first year even a tiny bit easier for affected families, better supporting this extremely vulnerable group.”

With the Christmas holiday season here, Australia’s regional towns are expected to be busier than ever, increasing the likelihood of road crashes. McLaughlin is giving a timely reminder about pedestrian safety and calling on Local Government Areas across the country to install critical safety signage in areas of high pedestrian activity.

Michelle McLaughlin says, “My message to caregivers is simple - always talk to your children about road safety, hold their hands until they are 10, and be particularly vigilant when you are on holiday or in new environments.

“My message to Local Government areas is also simple - if you are not already participating in the Little Blue Dinosaur Foundation’s child pedestrian safety campaigns, I urge you to consider doing so. The fatality and serious injury statistics speak for themselves. Working together can only make our communities safer for our most precious road users - children - particularly around areas of high pedestrian and vehicular activity.”

harder for drivers to see. We can do more to ensure that we keep child pedestrians safe,” says Ann Williamson.

For more information on The Little Blue Dinosaur Foundation, or to make a tax-deductible donation, please visit the littlebluedinosaur.org [1] https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports/children-youth/australias-children/contents/ health/injuries. [2] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2841012/

Emeritus Professor Ann Williamson, of the UNSW Sydney’s Transport and Road Safety Research Group, is in agreement.

“Both drivers and local councils need to be on high alert for the safety of young pedestrians.

We are coming up to a busy time of year, and an awareness campaign like that of Little Blue Dinosaur is so important. We know from our research that child pedestrians can move unpredictably and their smaller size makes them

Children under 10 need to hold an adult’s hand when near a busy road it is as important as putting on a seatbelt.

Drivers need to slow down around busy areas and be extra vigilant when parking and/or crossing driveways.

In general, children find it harder to judge the direction of sounds, the speed and distance of oncoming vehicles. They are still learning and developing the abilities required to identify safe crossings and anticipate driver behaviour.

on the shelf

kids

Somebody’s land by Adam Goodes & Ellie Laing This wonderful collaboration between Adnyamathanha and Narungga man Adam Goodes (former AFL), political advisor Ellie Laing, and Barkindji illustrator David Hardy. The book invites children and their families to imagine themselves into Australia’s past, to feel the richness of our First Nations’ history, and to acknowledge that our country was never terra nullius. Adam says ‘This book is a reflection of me. I’m incredibly hopeful. I choose to be positive, to help us heal as a nation.’

Published by Allen & Unwin . RRP $24.99 RRP

Let’s Talk About Emotions by Libby Aitken It’s not easy helping your child to manage the different emotions they feel.

You want to help, but you don’t know the best words to help them express and cope with their emotions. Reading Let’s Talk About Emotions together is a great way to start conversations about how your child is feeling.

Part of the Let’s Talk About series, it provides families with the understanding and tools for having caring conversations about the emotions we all share.

Published by Hinkler Books. RRP $14.99

Little Bont and the Big Secret by Marcus Bontempelli Marcus absolutely positively LOVES footy. But there’s something he loves even more than footy - his Nanna Nancy! Nanna is always there for Marcus. So when Marcus accidentally kicks his football into Nanna Nancy’s favourite garden gnome, he panics! Owning up to his mistake might land him in trouble. But lying to his Nanna doesn’t feel so good, either. From Western Bulldogs captain and three-time team Best & Fairest winner Marcus Bontempelli comes a heart-warming story about honesty, family... and of course, a little bit of footy. Published by Affirm Press. RRP $19.99.

An Aussie Christmas Gum Tree by Jackie Hosking From his lofty watch post, Possum is drawn to the sight of a distant tree covered in sparkling trinkets. A Christmas Tree, according to Kookaburra.

So begins a quest in which Possum and his crafty crew of helpers try very hard to decorate their very own Christmas gum tree from Bowerbird’s treasure trove. But it’s not as easy as you might think!

A beautiful seasonal book that celebrates Australian flora and fauna through bright and appealing illustrations. Written in rhyming text, this fun, lighthearted book is great for developing language skills.

Published by Walker Books Australia. RRP $24.95.

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t(w)een Animal Train: Wolf Girl 6 by Anh Do This series just keeps on delivering and we are loving it!

Wolf Girl and her pack are back for another hackle-raising adventure! When Gwen and her dogs jump on a train bound for the mountains, they are surprised to find the carriages are full of weird and wonderful animals! With the help of new and old friends, Gwen is determined to give the wild creatures their freedom, even if it means risking her own.

Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $15.99.

The Astonishing Chronicles of Oscar from Elsewhere

by Jaclyn Moriarty The magical fourth book in the rich and whimsical world of the Kingdoms and Empires, this is the account of what happened to Oscar last week, from Monday to Friday. That’s when Oscar found himself on a quest to locate nine separate pieces of a key, held by nine separate people, in order to unlock a gluggy silver spell that had trapped the Elven city of Dun-sorey-lo-vay-lohey. The quest was an urgent one. Friday at noon, the spell would become permanent, the Elves would be crushed to death and Oscar would be trapped in this magical world forever. Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $22.99

Aurora’s End by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff This is the hotly anticipated finale to the #1 international best-seller Aurora Rising and Aurora Burning. Even Brad Pitt has snapped up the TV rights!

What happens when you ask a bunch of losers, discipline cases and misfits to save the galaxy from an ancient evil? The ancient evil wins, of course.

When we last saw Squad 312, they were working together seamlessly as an intergalactic battle raged and an ancient superweapon threatened to obliterate Earth. Everything went horribly wrong, naturally. But as it turns out, not all endings are endings, and the team has one last chance to rewrite theirs. Maybe two. Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $19.99.

Gangsta Granny Strikes Again! by David Walliams The amazing sequel to beloved children’s book GANGSTA GRANNY by million-copy best-selling author David Walliams Ben is getting used to life without his beloved granny. She was a cabbage enthusiast, a Scrabble partner… and an international jewel thief known as The Black Cat. Now, only the memory of their extraordinary adventure to steal the Crown Jewels lives on. Then something inexplicable happens.

World-famous treasures are stolen in the dead of night and the clues point to none other than The Black Cat? But that’s impossible…?

Published by HarperCollins. RRP $22.99.

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adults Every Baby Name (Ruined) What’s in a name?’ Shakespeare asked. Quite a lot, as it turns out.

Brian Kerr turns a satirical eye on the sickly sweet baby name books to show expectant parents that names really do matter. It’s not about finding a name for your baby that you love, it’s about finding one you can’t hate. And it can only take one bit of information to strike it from the shortlist forever. This book does the heavy lifting and spoils them all, from Aaron and Angel to Zara and Zachary. Every Baby Name (Ruined) is perfect for expecting parents, their families, and everyone who feels obliged to buy them a gift.

Published by Affirm Press. RRP $19.99.

Anxious Girls Do It Better A Travel Guide for (Slightly Nervous) Girls on the Go by Bunny Banyai Anxious Girls Do It Better covers everything you need to know when travel designates anxiety as your (invisible) excess baggage. The third in the Girls Guide to the World series, this book contains practical advice from both travel and psychology experts, alongside the author’s own experiences of juggling holiday fun with a mixed bag of neuroses.

You don’t need an official diagnosis of anxiety to get something out of this book. Perhaps you’re simply nervous at the idea of parting with a wad of cash in exchange for three weeks at the beach.

Published by Hardie Grant Explore. RRP $29.99.

Wish You Were Here by Jodi Picoult In the breathtaking beauty of the Galapagos Islands, Diana will learn who she really is, and the person she wants to become, in Jodi’s deeply moving novel about the resilience of the human spirit.

Diana O’Toole is perfectly on track. She will be married by thirty, done having kids by thirty-five, and move out to the New York City suburbs, all while climbing the professional ladder in the cutthroat art auction world. She’s not engaged just yet, but she knows her boyfriend Finn, a surgical resident, is about to propose - days before her thirtieth birthday. Right on time.

Published by Allen and Unwin. RRP $32.99

One Year Of Ugly by Caroline Mackenzie When their beloved Aunt Celia dies, Yola and her family discover she had been keeping a huge secret – she was seriously in debt to local criminal, Ugly, and they must do his bidding until the debt is cleared..

So far, so ugly.

And then Ugly’s distracting gorgeous right-hand man Román arrives on the scene, and Yola just can’t help herself. Could this wildly inappropriate (and very messy) romance be the perfect antidote?

Published by HarperCollins GB. RRP $22.99

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12 ways to fightfoodwaste this Christmas The average family spends over $250 on Christmas day lunch alone.

Yet, one in five shopping bags end up in the bin! Follow these simple food saving tips to save money this Christmas.

You could save over $50!

Before Christmas 1

Plan your meals and check your fridge before shopping.

2

Write a shopping list and stick to it!

3

Use up food from your freezer the week before to make room for leftovers.

4

Stock up on storage containers, glad wrap and zip-lock bags ready for your leftovers!

5

Show your fridge some love and your food will last longer: Upper shelf

leftovers, yogurts, dips and sauces Lower shelf

meat, poultry and seafood Crisper drawers

fruit and veg

Keep your fridge at 4OC or below!

on Christmas day 6

Let guests serve themselves for perfect portions with no waste.

7

Get leftovers (especially seafood) into the fridge as soon as you can.

8

Peel leftover prawns and store in an airtight container, ready to be used another way on Boxing Day!

11

Feed delicious leftovers to friends and neighbours, not the bin!

12

Use your senses rather than being guided by use-by labels to save good food.

come back for more!

after Christmas 9

Keep whole ham wrapped in a clean damp cloth in fridge or carve it up ready to eat the next day or freeze.

Save the ham!

10

Move food that needs eating to the front of the fridge and use up what you have!

No … Don’t feed me this Christmas!

SUMMER SORTED Summer is here and, just like every year, SPF is front of mind for us all. But how on earth is a Mama supposed to choose from the plethora of sunscreens on the market? Well, lucky for you, we had a chat with Dr Scott McGregor, We Are Feel Good Inc. Co-Founder and Skin Cancer and Cosmetic Physician who gave us the low down so your decision process is a little less mind boggling this summer!

So, step away from all the glorious packaging, dreamy tag lines and sun filled imagery. It’s time time get to know the differences between physical and chemical sunscreens and browse Mama’s favourites!

What is a chemical based sunscreen?

Chemical sunscreens are widely used to make broad spectrum sunscreens - that is, using a combination of filters to block UVA + UVB rays. They are technically considered ‘organic’, as the UV filters used are organic chemicals (substances that contain carbon).

What is a physical based sunscreen?

Physical (mineral) sunscreens generally use zinc oxide as their UV filter. Zinc oxide is an excellent broad spectrum filter, covering almost the full range of UVA and UVB, but not to the same extent as a well formulated “chemical sunscreen” using multiple filters. Think of using zinc as using a sheet rather than a blanket to protect from the cold, both cover the whole body, but one gives more complete protection.

Do both physical and chemical sunscreens offer the same protection?

Chemical and physical filters work in exactly the same way, by absorbing UV rays from the sun and converting them to heat. They only vary by how effectively they do this.’

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What formula would you recommend for someone looking to try a new sunscreen?

There is no doubt that the “best “ protection, or most complete protection from UVA and UVB radiation is achieved using multiple filters. This could be a combination of organic (chemical) filters, or a mix of organic filters with zinc oxide, or organic filters with titanium.

At the end of the day, the best sunscreen is the one you WANT to wear! Just wear sunscreen and reapply.

Mama’s favourite physical SPFs: Dr Roebucks Barrier Reef SPF50+ RRP $49 Invisible Zinc Sheer Defence SPF50 RRP $34 SunButter Skincare water-resistant reef safe SPF50- RRP $29.95 Mama’s top chemical SPFs: Aesthetics Rx Face & Body Sunscreen- RRP $59 Skinstitut Age Defence SPF50+ RRP $49 We Are Feel Good Inc Sensitive Sunscreen Lotion SPF50+ RRP$ 29.95 Mama loves these tinted SPFs: Sukin SPF30 Sheer Touch Face Tinted Sunscreen SPF 30 RRP $24.95 Invisible Zinc Sheer Defence Moisturiser Light & Medium SPF 50- RRP $34 We Are Feel Good Inc Sticky Zinc Light & Medium SPF50+ RRP $29.95 Mama recommends these kid-friendly SPFs: We Are Feel Good Inc Baby Mineral Sunscreen SPF50+ RRP $29.95 Wotnot Baby Sunscreen SPF 30 100g RRP $19.95 Little Innoscents Natural Sun Lotion SPF 30 100ml RRP $19.99

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WHAT’S FOR DINNER TONIGHT? “It’s all about falling in love with home cooking again” says Adam Liaw, esteemed Masterchef alumni (he won the 2nd series back in 2010) and dad to three adorably cute kids.

This is what he tells people when they ask what his SBS cooking show The Cook Up is about, and it’s a great tip to find your cooking mojo again when you get asked the same question every day; “What’s for dinner?”.

Home cooking is something we do every day, or at least we aspire to. Adam’s recipes are designed for just that – daily cooking. They’re not recipes you need to wait for a special occasion to tackle, but are the kind of things he hopes will become part of your everyday repertoire.

Adam and his wife, Asami, have three kids – Christopher, 7, Anna, 5, and Benji, 1 – and with long days spent travelling or on The Cook Up set (over 160 episodes have aired already), dinners have to be efficient, no-fuss and crowd-pleasing.

“I guess now I’m a dad, and so much of my cooking revolves around that period from like 5.30pm to 6.30pm, where you’ve got to get an awful lot done.

I don’t spend hours and hours cooking at home for my family every night.”

Tonight’s Dinner brings us fresh, modern everyday food inspired by the expanding spread of dishes on Australian tables today.

Adam’s warmth, humour and dynamic cookingstyle will put the joy of cooking back into your kitchen easily, so you can feed your friends and family with thoughtful, healthful meals. These recipes require minimal preparation, are balanced in nutrition, affordable and light on the washing up!

Because, often, the key to good home cooking is to just do good home cooking.

So today Mama’s got you a little sneak peak with our chosen three faves from the new book...

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Broccolini & sausage spaghetti An excellent way of keeping the kitchen clean and reducing stove time when preparing your evening meal is to make good use of your oven. Load a bunch of broccolini and sausage into a tray with a few aromatics, bake until they’re ready, then stir through some cooked pasta.

Serves 4 | Prep 10 min Cook 20 min Ingredients 1⁄2 cup olive oil 2 bunches broccolini 3 garlic cloves, bruised 1 large red chilli, sliced 4 good-quality Italian sausages 3 anchovies, roughly chopped (optional)

salt and black pepper, to season 500g dried spaghetti grated parmesan, to serve Method Heat your oven to 220°C fan-forced.

Pour the olive oil into a large roasting tin or ovenproof frying pan. Slice the broccolini into 5 cm (2 in) lengths on a sharp diagonal and scatter into the tin with the garlic and chilli.

Squeeze the sausages out of their skins and crumble over the broccolini. Scatter the anchovies over, if using, and season with a little salt.

Meanwhile, bring a large pot of water to the boil and salt it well. Add the spaghetti and cook according to the packet directions, but start to test for doneness about 2 minutes before it says it will be ready.

When the pasta is al dente, drain it, but reserve about 1⁄4 cup of the pasta water.

Remove the baked broccolini and sausage from the oven and transfer the drained pasta to the roasting tin, together with the pasta water.

Toss together and serve topped with parmesan and plenty of black pepper.

Bake for 15–20 minutes until the sausage is cooked and the broccolini charred.

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Lamb shoulder tacos Serves 8 | Prep 20 min Cook 4 hr | Rest 15 min Ingredients: 1.5kg lamb shoulder, bone in Salt and pepper, to season 1 tablespoon olive oil Juice of 1⁄2 lemon 1 teaspoon dried oregano 6 brown onions, quartered 1 garlic bulb, halved horizontally 24 small flour tortillas 2 cups (500g) tzatziki Mint Salsa: 1 small red onion, finely diced 1⁄2 cup loosely packed mint leaves, shredded 1 tablespoon sugar 2 tablespoons red-wine vinegar Juice of 1⁄2 lemon 2 tablespoons hot water

24

Salt and black pepper, to season Greek salad salsa: 4 tomatoes, finely diced 2 Lebanese cucumbers, diced 1⁄2 green capsicum (bell pepper), finely diced 2 teaspoons red-wine vinegar 2 tablespoons olive oil Salt, to season 150g Greek feta 1⁄2 teaspoon dried oregano Method: Heat your oven to 175°C. Season the lamb shoulder well with salt and black pepper and rub with the olive oil, lemon juice and dried oregano. Place the onion and garlic in a lidded roasting tin, rest the lamb on top and add a cup water.

Cover with the lid and roast for 4 hours. Remove the lamb from the oven and leave to rest for about 15 minutes.

While the lamb is resting, wrap the tortillas in foil or baking paper in stacks of six and heat in the oven for about 20 minutes.

Combine the mint salsa ingredients in a small bowl and allow to stand for 10 minutes before using.

For the Greek salad salsa, combine the tomato, cucumber, capsicum, vinegar and olive oil in a bowl. Season well with salt. Crumble the feta over the top and scatter with the oregano.

Serve the lamb with the salsas, tortillas and tzatziki.

Photography: ©Steve Brown.

Set photography: ©Bruce Walters .

This is an edited extract from Tonight’s Dinner by Adam Liam, published by Hardie Grant Books & SBS, RRP $45. Available in stores nationally.

Tofu doughnuts Of all the recipes we’ve ever made on The Cook Up, this has been the favourite of the entire crew. One vital point to consider is that different brands of tofu will have a different liquid content, so the amount of flour you add will vary. The softer your batter, the fluffier your doughnuts will be.

Makes About 12 | Prep 5 min Rest 30 min | Cook 10 min Ingredients: 300g silken tofu 60g caster sugar 14g baking powder 1 cup plain (all-purpose) flour, approximately 4 cups vegetable oil, for deep-frying, approximately

Cinnamon sugar: 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon 3 teaspoons caster sugar Method: Place the tofu in a medium mixing bowl with the caster sugar and squash with a spatula, pressing against the side of the bowl until smooth – or you can press the tofu through a sieve to make this process a little faster.

Combine the baking powder and flour, then sift the mixture into the tofu a little at a time, mixing the dry ingredients with the tofu and stopping when the mixture forms a thick batter that you can still spoon easily.

The amount of flour you need will vary quite a lot depending on the liquid content of your tofu. I suggest starting with

about half the flour and seeing how it looks. You may not need to add much more if your tofu is quite dry.

Rest the batter in the fridge for 30 min if you can, although this isn’t strictly necessary. Resting the batter will help the gluten in the flour to relax, resulting in a fluffier doughnut.

Using a mortar and pestle, grind the cinnamon sugar ingredients together into a fine powder (or you can just mix them together if you prefer).

Heat the oil in a large saucepan to 160°C. Fry spoonfuls of the batter for 4–5 minutes, working in batches as required, until puffed and golden brown.

Drain on a wire rack, then dust generously with cinnamon sugar and serve warm.

Give sick kids in hospital a

Donate Today starlight.org.au

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HOLIDAY FUN Summer holidays are here so we’ve put together some ideas of great activities to do on a tight budget to keep your kids entertained.

The local museums, observatories, and galleries are exciting places for children to discover and explore with many offering hands on experiences and guess what, the children won’t even know it is educational!

Bike, skate, and scooter paths all build muscle strength and co-ordination and allow children to get that all important fresh air and sunlight for the day. Remember the Cancer Council Sun safety message, Slip, Slop, Slap, Seek, Slide.

The local libraries are always a hive of activity during school holidays with many activities across different age groups available.

Spending time by the beach, waterhole or rivers is always fun for children. There are many opportunities near waterways where children can explore, wonder, find treasures and ask questions about the world around them. Seek out information about the natural lands from local Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people or local councils often have information on the local areas. Ask children to look for particular items in the rock pool or along the beach, talking with them about their find. Remember to be always vigilant about the safety of your children near water.

Cooking with children is a lot of fun and it teaches them reading skills and following instructions; maths like numbers (1 egg) fractions (1/4 cup, 1/2 cup), and science (how properties change like watching a solid dob of butter melting into liquid). Consider Googling your favourite recipe.

Recycled/reusable crafts is a rewarding way to use items around the home and turn them into something you could use! Consider making storage jars out of food jars by decorating them. Use egg cartons, cereal boxes, yogurt containers and more recyclables from around the home, this allows children to imagine and create the most amazing things from robots to boats that can sail in a tub of water. Try cutting plastic milk bottles down, place soil in and grow vegetable from seedlings. This not only encourages children to learn about how living things grow but also how important it is to take care of plants and the environment.

Make a kite, collect wooden stick, use paper, plastic bags, or fabric. Check the wind conditions for the local park and go and have some fun.

Make your own games such as noughts and crosses sets from stones, or Twister using different coloured cushions or draw the game with chalk on the driveway. Inside in the rain?

Try a game of musical chairs.

But most importantly, go and enjoy the summer holidays with your family!

By Suzie Wood, Head of Quality and Compliance Story House Early Learning

beach babes Hey Mama, we all know the pain when it comes to packing for a day at the beach! So much stuff, so many bags and so many unhelpful small people running off and leaving you to struggle!! Well, we’ve found the perfect collection of beach essentials that’ll ensure there’s no struggling, the kids are entertained & you can relax in style! This Summer is all about you Mama, so sit back and take it easy!

Rhodin sunnies Caramel Blush Wing $79

SunButter SPF 50 Water Resistant Reef Safe Sunscreen $29.95

Bose Sound Link Bluetooth Speaker $199.95

Secra Poppy arch support leather sandals $190

Decjuba Foldable Straw Visor $29.95

Sunnylife Underwater Camera $29.99

The Somewhere Co Wine cooler $52

Evo Hair Salty Dog Spray $36 Once & Well Chardonnay $19 28

Vuly Beach Rover Wagon $149

Archies Kids Thongs Coral $30

Sammimis towel for Mama Cote D’Azur - $34.99

Saturday Sun Aspen Sun Umbrella $249.00 Tropic Trucker Koala Lovers Cap $29.95

Waboba Voli Paddle Set $39.99

Infamous X Feminaè by Adele Barbaro Gwen one piece $149

Fants Kids Wetsuit $179

Recycled Mats Beach Mat $146.95

BOOBS, RAGS & JUDY BLOOM ‘When will I get my boobs?’

I was eleven years old, and ever since I’d finished Judy Blume’s seminal work, Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, I was in our kitchen moaning to Mum on a daily basis about my glaring lack of mammary glands (Ms Blume has a lot to answer for).

Mum made no comment, just shifted her weight slightly on her feet and continued standing at the sink with her back to me. I sighed and resolved to return to my bedroom to do some more breast-enhancing exercises. ‘I must, I must, I must increase my bust... ’ I’m not sure how this technique was supposed to work, but I hoped it would – and soon! My gaggle of girls (I had dubbed us ‘The Gang’ so we sounded tougher than we actually were) was due to arrive in a few hours for a weekend get-together at my place and I was still as disappointingly flat as the proverbial surfboard.

There were seven of us, and I’d worked hard to make these friends after swapping schools a year earlier, in Grade 6. I watched with envy as they all got their ‘marbles’, which gradually developed into well-formed little breasts. I only had fleabites where two nice little mounds should be.

I would try to fool my mates by popping down the front of my top some dried up balls of ‘Slime in a Bucket’, horrid kids’ gunk sourced from a showbag I got at the local agricultural show in Townsville in Far North Queensland. That got old when my snot-green goo boobs slipped out of place, or worse, fell out and onto the floor.

‘Phoebe’s got fakies!’ screeched the other girls, as I burned with shame.

Cute as my struggles seem in retrospect, my overdue puberty eventually became beyond a joke. One by one, members of The Gang came to school with a certain look in their eyes – an unholy mixture of pride and horror – and announced they had got their ‘rags’. Each time I felt a choking jealousy that made my head fuzzy. It was like the sensation of sand being 30

sucked out from under your feet as waves break on the beach. My ears blocked up. I barely heard my friends as they gushed through the gory details of the arrival of their monthlies.

‘It’s raining down south!’ one would say. ‘Nosebleed in Tasmania,’ another would reply. ‘Clean up in aisle one,’ piped in a third.

Resounding giggles. I moved so I could sit on my hands. ‘How about that new Madonna video clip?’ I would offer weakly, desperate to appear somewhat mature and cool. ‘What do you think she’s on about when she says, “Papa don’t preach”?’ The girls would stop to eye me before going back to listing their top ten euphemisms for menstruation.

For my part, I would resist the urge to flick their trainer bra straps until their backs bled in tandem with their vaginas. But now was not the time for revenge. Rather, I was making a blue-chip investment in my popularity stock, which would soar to an all-time high when I held a rockin’ pre-teen sleepover. This would be our chance to gossip about hot boys and choreograph some new routines to the synthstyles of ’80s pop music like ‘Girls Just Want to Have Fun’ by Cyndi Lauper or, if we were feeling a tad more artistic, something like ‘One Night in Bangkok’ by Murray Head. It was going to be a bonding time for us all, and I sure as heck didn’t want to be on the outer for that. I spent a lot of time making sure it would all go perfectly.

My bedroom was looking just right: plastered with teen idol posters of the boys from Pseudo Echo and Wa Wa Nee and the permanent paint murals Mum had allowed us to splatter the walls with as she was ‘going to wallpaper over them as soon as we moved out when we turned seventeen’ anyway. The fridge was crampacked with drinks and snacks – mini pizzas, party pies and fizzy drinks – and my little sister Bonnie had been banished to one of her own friends’ houses for the afternoon. Everything was set to go. Only Mum seemed out of sorts.

I’m not sure of the precise moment when my mother’s attitude began to change. It might have been when I refused to wear white t-shirts out of the house unless I had a singlet on underneath. Or it might have been the hours I had begun to spend gazing at my own reflection at all angles in the full-length mirror. Maybe it was when I started bringing up awkward subjects such as pregnancy, abortion and birth control. Mum became a little jumpy around me. I couldn’t quite diagnose it, but I could sense her unsettled energy and decided the best course of action would be to steer clear.

Finally, the first cars arrived to drop off my friends. Parents waved farewell to their youngsters behind a plume of Winfield Blue smoke and ash as they sped away down the street, leaving my friends to trudge up our steep driveway. Before long, my bedroom had reached a fever pitch of squeals, shrieking laughter and the other assorted sounds of pubescent lounging and lolligagging.

When one gal pal chucked an unused tampon in another’s lap, resulting in an extra shrill scream, Mum poked her head in long enough for me to see her disapproving expression. I pretended not to notice, and she stalked off..

‘Oh my god, Phoebe, I think your mum doesn’t like us!’ one friend whispered theatrically.

‘Don’t worry about her,’ I said.

‘She’s probably about to get a visit from Aunty Flo.’ Wild hilarity. Pitch and timing perfect. Put them off the hot topic of my own deficit with some on-topic humour. Excellent decoy.

‘So...’ ventured another friend, ‘has George come to visit you yet, Phoebe?’

Damn! ‘Er, no, not yet.’

Loaded pause. The girls looked at one another.

One broke the silence.

‘You’re nearly twelve, Phoebe. Maybe something’s . . . wrong?’ ‘Yeah, maybe you should ask your mother about it?’ someone added.

the subject with my mother. ‘Sure. That’s what we’d do.’

All nodded earnestly, wide doe-eyes. I straightened my back and injected some bravado into my voice.

‘Alright then, I’ll ask her right now.’

A sudden burst of energy and everyone got up as a chattering whole to leave the room together.

‘Maybe you guys should stay here.’

My suggestion was met with poutiness and smirks. I turned away from the tittering tits and went searching for Mum. I discovered her in the backyard, watering the plants.

She saw me sidling towards her and angled slightly away, aiming her nozzle at a despondent soursop sapling.

‘Um, Mum,’ I said sheepishly. ‘Can I ask you a question?’

Mum flicked her eyes at me. Muffled laughter came from the back window and I turned to see The Gang all peering through to eavesdrop on the exchange. Mum looked up and saw them too. She rolled her eyes and pivoted, yanking the hose towards a remote corner of the yard.

I shooed the girls and waited until they’d reluctantly moved away. Hearing them retreat back to the bedroom, I approached Mum again with trepidation. A few metres from where she was standing, facing the garden, I stopped and waited for her to acknowledge me.

‘What is it, Phoebe?’ she said exasperatedly. I swallowed and went for it.

‘Umm. Everyone’s been asking me, and I was wondering . . . when will I get my periods?’

Mum stiffened and half-turned towards me.

A general mumble of agreement.

I’m not sure why I phrased my question in this particular way. I expected her perhaps to simply say ‘Soon’ or ‘Be patient, it will happen in time’, and that would be the end of the conversation.

Funny things, expectations.

‘You think?’ I said, looking up from my lap at all six faces through my fringe. I’d been avoiding

Mum sighed. ‘Phoebe, you’ll never get your periods.’

31

I stood blinking in the afternoon light, stunned.

My lips formed a basic monosyllabic response.

‘Why?’ Mum’s mouth tightened.

‘Because... you don’t have a uterus.

So you can’t have periods, and you can’t have a baby.’

My head began eddying with thick, dark thoughts. The inner part of me was screaming Whaaaaatt!?! but the outer part was completely blank, speechless.

‘You can adopt, though, if you like,’ Mum added.

A beat. ‘Really? Are you... sure?’ I said eventually.

‘No periods?’

‘Okay then... at least I’ve got something I can tell the others. They’ve all been asking why I haven’t got my period yet.’

For the first time, Mum whipped around and faced me, eye to eye.

‘Don’t you tell them anything!’

My eyes must have popped out of my head.

Mum calmed herself a little before proceeding.

‘It’s not a good idea to tell anyone about this.

Your father and I haven’t told anyone else, not even Grandma and Granddad.

So let’s keep this a secret. Our secret. Okay?’

Her words snapped me out of fogginess into a clear, tangible focus and I sensed blood pounding in my temples. I had a secret. A really, REALLY big secret. I couldn’t believe even my beloved grandma wasn’t allowed to know.

‘Is that everything?’ Mum was looking at me.

I got the feeling she didn’t want me to ask another question.

I stood there for a moment longer, before turning around quietly and re-entering the house. My memory of what happened next or what I said is murky. I suspect that, in a trancelike state, I nodded, left Mum to her garden and stumbled back to the bedroom with its air of breathless anticipation. I imagine that The Gang was dying to know what had happened – some- thing, anything! – but I can’t remember what I told them. Most likely, ‘It’s nothing.’ But it was something.

32

In the end, my breasts did start to emerge, little by little. But by then I had assigned myself apart from the girls and their feminine ways. There was nothing in any Judy Blume book that could explain this to me, and no one to ask ‘why’? It would be ages before I understood the reason – many years before I learnt that I am intersex and that my sex chromosomes and organs are male. All I knew was I was different. Very different.

It was a profound feeling that shaped my adolescence and my life for a long time to come.

Looking back, I have mixed emotions about this time. It was the start of my journey towards understanding my body and myself more, although it was rough and things didn’t get much better any time soon. I still struggle sometimes to accept I’ll never be normal, whatever the hell ‘normal’ means. In these times, I feel confused and lonely, much like the eleven-year-old me. But as my knowledge of human experience has expanded, I’ve come to realise I’m not alone in feeling this complicated mélange of shame, loss, discovery and, finally, pride. And now I know I am accepted for exactly who I am.

By Phoebe Hart. This is an edited extract from Growing up in Australia, Published by Black Inc. RRP $29.99.

Growing Up in Australia also features gems from essential Australian memoirs such as Rick Morton’s One Hundred Years of Dirt and Magda Szubanski’s Reckoning.

Contributors include Tim Winton, Benjamin Law, Anna Goldsworthy, Nyadol Nyuon, Tara June Winch, Miranda Tapsell, Carly Findlay and many more. With a foreword by Alice Pung, this anthology is a wonderful gift for adult and adolescent readers alike.

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33

WHAT’S NEXT FOR YEAR 12’S - YEAR 13?

What a year it’s been for the Coronavirus Class of 2021. The cohort entered its final year of secondary education having barely recovered from the chaos of 2020, and dove head first into what probably takes the cake as the hardest year of schooling ever.

But after a long and stressful year characterised by lockdowns, remote learning and social isolation which took its toll on Year 12s, approximately 76,399 students.

As it stands the world has changed remarkably over the past two years, let alone the last 100 years, however the school-to-life transition has remained largely the same. Thousands of teens year after year are feeling intense pressure to make the right choice for their future as the world rapidly changes around them but their support structures do not.

The result of this of course has been increased rates of stress on teens who are struggling to find their place.

So, how can we, as parents, support and empower our teens to forge their own pathways in life?

Saxon Phipps, co-founder of Gen Z Digital Platform, Year13, understands this dilemma all too well.

“Growing up, we lost one of our best mates after they couldn’t come to terms with what was next for them following high school.

We quickly realised that there was a lack of institutional and societal support for young adults as they embark on one of life’s big moments; the transition within young adulthood.

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“The transition from twelve years of institutionalised education to an abundance of freedom in making your own big life decisions can be one of the most frightening and stressful experiences in young adulthood, especially for this cohort of Year 12’s who are more accustomed to isolation as a result of remote learning, home schooling and reduced face-toface interactions.” says Saxon.

“All of these pressure points alone can cultivate a significant amount of stress and anxiety within our teens, not to mention the additional pressure they place on themselves to achieve their “perfect score”. Modern education has taught our youth that ATAR scores and grades are the greatest measurement of success, which is simply not true in the real world.”

So with all of this in mind, how can we support our teens if they don’t get their magic ATAR score?

Remind your teen that their ATAR score is not the only measurement of success.

The ATAR system only measures a very specific way of thinking and ignores all the other ways that somebody can find success. It’s not just parents thinking this either; we surveyed students and recent school-leavers across the country and only 13% of youth agree with the ATAR system. Schools and teachers can be so singular in their approach to the future that we have trouble figuring out what we’re going to do if we don’t achieve the ATAR we set for ourselves. The truth is, using this mark is one way to get where you want. It may be the most direct, but it just isn’t for everyone, nor is it the only way.

Help your teen find their purpose.

While there is an abundance of courses and pathways to choose from, it can be easy for teens to feel lost and overwhelmed with the options after receiving their ATAR score: “Do I want to go straight into uni?”

“Do I want to take a gap year?”

“Do I even like science or is it just one of my strengths?”

“What if I go straight into full-time work?”

This is where it is important for parents to remind teens to gravitate towards their hobbies, strengths and passion-points. Encourage them to put more time into the things that fuel them with the most passion and excitement, even if it means trying something new and unexpected.

Big things never came from comfort zones.

Encourage your teen to take a gap year.

Whether you love it or hate it, gap years are where young adults can learn the most about themselves.

Now that your teen is entering an exciting new world of adulthood, it is truly a great opportunity for them to venture out of their comfort zone, take the time to re-assess their priorities and perhaps revisit tertiary education once they have had some more life experience.

Taking a gap year to travel abroad (internationally or locally) is an incredible way for Z’ers to immerse themselves in a new environment, own their independence as well as celebrate their achievements after a tough year.

Attend open days and get to know course coordinators.

If your teen has their heart set on a specific course but didn’t get the score, be sure to attend university open days and get to know the course coordinators. It’s a great way for your teen to get their foot in the door and to be considered for mid-year university intake.

Check out year13.com.au for tools and advice.

We work with Gen Z’ers everyday and understand how tough it can be. Year13 exists to help alleviate the additional stressors for young people by sharing unique life hacks and real world advice to help them with their next big life decision. We want to empower young people to live happy, healthy and fulfilled lives by providing career and life advice that help young people find the right opportunity that is true to their being.

For more information visit www.year13.com.au

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DROWNING IS SILENT AND SECONDS SAVE LIVES Drowning is silent and seconds save lives. This is the message Australia’s peak swim school industry body is spreading far and wide after the pandemic pause on swimming lessons led to a national skills regression among young children.

After two years of ongoing disruptions, which forced swimming lessons to shut down for months at a time, there has never been a better time to turn our attention to swim safety and protect early swimmers who have missed out on this vital stage of their development.

Helping put an end to child drownings, the Australian Swim School Association (ASSA) is supporting thousands of families nationally in sharing the water safety message.

We are reminding families that seconds count when it comes to child drownings and it’s not only the pool that offers risk - bathtubs, kiddie pools and ponds are also hazardous. From parents to carers, it’s everyone’s job to discuss drowning prevention all year round as you can never be too prepared.

You cannot always hear when a child is in danger and that is why prevention is crucial - as is having an emergency action plan - should the other layers of protection be broken.

If you haven’t thought about what you would do if there was an emergency in or around water, here are our top tips: 1) If a child is missing, check any water areas FIRST - seconds count 2) Ensure everyone who cares for your child, including you, knows CPR 3) Have an Emergency Action Plan in place, especially if you have a home pool or live close to a waterway

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4) Ensure all the other layers of protection are around your child - supervision, barriers and swimming and water safety skills - dealing with an emergency is the second line of defence.

We strongly encourage mums with babies and young children to have discussions around what to do if a child finds themselves in danger and to have an emergency plan to refer to.

To open the conversation around safer swimming, ASSA launched the Countdown to Summer Series on November 1. Launched in 2020, the Countdown to Summer Series is a water safety campaign that helps educate parents by offering tips to prevent drownings and non-fatal drownings at home. It also shares the vital water safety messaging year-round and incorporates ASSA’s friendly mascots, the SAFERwater Warriors.

Each SAFERwater Warrior has a vital message attached to them and is designed as a fun approach to spreading vital water safety messages.

Swimming Skills = GLIDE Adult Supervision = SKYE Fences & Gates = FORCE Emergency Action Plan = DASH

By Emily McNeill, General Manager of ASSA. The Australian Swim Schools Association is a not for profit founded in 2016 and it is the national peak industry body for swim schools and learn to swim businesses, teaching swimming and water safety. australianswimschools.org.au

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5 TIPS FOR HAVING AN ETHICAL CHRISTMAS It’s the most wonderful time of the year. In a few weeks, we’ll be hanging up stockings, singing carols over dinner and unboxing gifts under the Christmas tree.

To double the fun, consider practicing a few ethical things during the holidays. They are not only friendly to the environment and your wallet, but also help to flex your creative muscles – who doesn’t like a challenge? Maybe you’ll wake up on Boxing Day knowing you had a wholesome time with friends and family, while doing this world a great favour.

Handmade cards & gift tags Who hasn’t handmade a card for their mum on Mother’s Day or dad on Father’s Day when they were young? They don’t have to remain a thing of the past. Instead of paying five dollars for a streamlined card imprinted with a generic message, get your hands dirty and make one for your friend, partner or children. They will love it.

Wrap instead of scrap Gift wrap is often used and discarded without much thought about its environmental impact.

On average, Aussies use more than 150,000 km of Christmas wrapping paper, which is enough to wrap around Earth’s equator nearly four times.

Still got some of last year’s wrapping paper?

Give it a clean and it’s ready for reuse. Or if you’ve received some new ones with the gift you got this year, save it up for next Christmas.

You can also try out gift wrapping made with fabric, or a tea towel, which is easier to re-use than paper.

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Evergreen Christmas trees Artificial Christmas trees are popular for a reason, but let’s not forget about the carbon footprint left behind when making them. These trees are made of mostly PVC plastic which can take hundreds of years to break down and then it breaks down into microplastics. So, unless you own one that is being reused every year, chances are the one standing in your house today will end up in landfill in the new year.

There are many alternative ways to make a Christmas tree ‘evergreen’ while maintaining that living room glamour. Buying or renting a live-potted tree is an extremely cost-effective option, as the tree will continue to grow after Christmas and become a staple in the household. Or consider DIY-ing one with cardboard or fairy lights (to save space). If it’s achievable, you can even grow, use and replant your own tree.

Shop and give ethically It’s shopping and gifting season, but hold your wallet. Are you really spending each dollar of your yearly bonus on where it’s most needed or splurging because marketing emails are telling you to do so? If it’s the latter, take a step back and ask yourself a few questions – is this item a want or a need? Where will it go after the Christmas frenzy? Can it be reused or repurposed? If it’s a gift for someone, will it really suit their needs? Is there a pre-loved alternative that serves the same purpose and delivers the same amount of joy?

It’s important to keep this in mind when shopping for kids too. Our recent research revealed that Australians spend over $1 billion on new toys every Christmas, while throwing out 26.8 million toys in the bin every year. Why not consider buying a pre-loved toy? At Flora & Fauna, pre-loved toys are currently available for purchase, with all proceeds donated to help disadvantaged children in need. A simple act like this will not only save a toy from landfill, but also help another child have a surprisingly better Christmas.

Pass it on Pass on the eco-conscious spirit to families and friends. Tell others that you would appreciate socially conscious or eco-friendly gifts. Drop a hint on your ideal gift so they can give something you will actually use. If you have an unwanted or pre-loved item that is in good condition, donate it to a local charity – it might just be exactly what another family needs to have a complete Christmas.

By Julie Mathers, CEO & founder of Flora & Fauna. https://www.floraandfauna.com.au/

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AbbIe does It her way It’s common knowledge that female athletes aren’t always given the same attention and opportunities as their male counterparts, and for one young sports fan this simply isn’t ok. Whether it be AFLW, cricket, soccer or basketball, Abbie has been to more women’s sporting matches than she can count and knows a lot about Australia’s best female athletes, so she decided to create a digital magazine to celebrate these women in sport.

Aimed at young sport loving girls, the first issue of ‘Her Way’ magazine launched on September 24 at a cost of $2, with half the money going to UNICEF Australia’s Empower Girls Through Cricket appeal. Oh, and did we mention Abbie is only 11 years old! Wow!

Gosh Abbie, magazine editor at 11 years old! Tell us how Her Way came about.

I’ve always loved sport, and for a couple of years I’ve been buying magazines about TV shows and music and celebrities. But whenever I would go to an appointment, I would sit in the waiting room and see sports magazine and there was only ever a couple of pages about women’s sport, which I thought was unfair. So I asked my dad one day why there weren’t any magazines for kids about women’s sport, and he said, “well why don’t you make one?!” So I did, and here we are today!

Your magazine’s motto is “if she can, you can”. I guess that applies to you creating a magazine too!

How much time do you spend creating each issue?

Yeah, it takes a fair bit of work. My dad helps me a bit with research for interviews and working out what should be in each issue. I try to take a 40

week off after each new issue comes out before I get back into the next one. But I try to spend between an hour or two on the magazine most days in the lead, whether that’s doing an interview, typing, researching or doing the creative stuff!

You’ve got some pretty high profile athletes supporting you.

Who has been the most exciting person who has bought the mag?

I’ve got a few AFLW players who have subscribed or bought it - it’s really exciting when someone you have admired for a while buys it and mentions it on their social media.

Hannah Darlington, Maitland Brown and Elyse Villani are cricketers who have all bought it, plus Hannah Green the golfer, as well as hall of fame golfer Karrie Webb!

How do you come up with the ideas for content in the magazine?

It’s a combination of seeing what big sporting events and competitions might be coming up, and then trying to interview athletes from those to help create awareness of them. Also, some sports actually contact me saying they’d like

one of their athletes to be interviewed, so that’s pretty cool. And then I try to add some fun stuff too like athletes’ dogs!

Who has been the most exciting person you have interviewed so far and why?

Hmm… so many of them have been fun and exciting, it seems unfair to just say one. But for this new December issue I got to interview swimmer Cate Campbell, which was pretty incredible because I’ve admired her for basically half of my life! And she was so lovely and friendly which made it more special.

Who are we going to read about in the December issue?

Well, as I just mentioned, there’s a big interview with Cate Campbell, as well as another big interview with basketballer Shyla Heal - we went and chatted in a park which was cool.

Plus I interviewed a couple of Matildas, a Paralympic gold medallist and even a speedway car racer!

What does an average weekend in Sydney look like for you? What do you get up to when sport isn’t involved?

I like being creative, so whether it’s drawing or writing. Plus I try to see family as much as I can.

And to unwind I love watching a bit of Bluey with my little sister!

What do you see yourself doing when you finish school?

Starting ‘Her Way’ has made me want to maybe be a sports journalist, but there are a lot of things I am passionate about and enjoy doing, so there are lots of possibilities I hope.

Finally, where can we find your magazine?

You can purchase the mag at her-way-magazine. square.site for only $2!

What’s your favourite sport to play and do you aspire to play sport professionally one day too?

I love lots of sports, but the two I play the most now are AFL and cricket. I like basketball, tennis and lots of other sports too. I would love to be a professional one day, but we will have to wait and see!

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How to Teach KIDS DIversIty When toddlers start preschool, they join the larger social community. They begin interacting more with different people outside their families and learning about other cultures.

Experts believe that delaying a conversation about race and diversity can do more harm than good as children begin to notice gender and racial differences at about two years of age.

So, it is essential to teach our children tolerance, acceptance, and compassion from the earliest age.

Why is it important to teach children diversity?

Teaching children about cultural diversity is essential if we want to live in a society that values equality, acceptance, and justice for all.

The first five years of life are marked by rapid and radical developmental changes in the brain, allowing children to learn about the world around them and their place in it from a very young age.

In other words, young children internalize social messages from their parents, caregivers, early childhood educators, and other adults throughout daily interactions and by observing the behaviour we model for them. Such messages can have lifelong consequences for a child and a whole society.

Diversity activities teach young kids to understand, respect, and celebrate the differences among people. You can address all types of differences such as gender, race, religion, and culture this way.

Such activities help children understand that we are all humans, despite our individual differences and backgrounds.

There are different ways to expose your children to diversity and instil a sense of tolerance and acceptance in them. Books are one of the great diversity activities to introduce in your home or classroom.

Diversity Books Once, while playing the Guess Who board game, I had a conversation with a preschooler who asked me whether my person had “normal” skin. I told the child that both skins were normal; one was lighter and one was darker but both normal and unique.

Kids are naturally curious and eager to learn about the world around them.

However, working in the childcare field, I realized there was a minimal selection of books that taught children about diversity.

Since most kids show genuine interest in books and stories, reading books like Two Little Hearts can be a great way to teach your child about diversity. Additionally, reading helps preschoolers learn the letters and get to know the sounds, words, and language, which is the groundwork for early literacy skills development.

So, why not tap into your child’s inborn curiosity and interest in storytelling and introduce age-appropriate board books about diversity? Two Little Hearts is a story about two babies’ similarities and differences. My goal was to communicate that we are all valued and loved through an age-appropriate story young children can easily relate to.

Two Little Hearts introduces a diversity concept that might seem confusing to young learners naturally and spontaneously and in an ageappropriate way. Reading Two Little Hearts together can be a great way to spend quality time and bond with your child while teaching them empathy, understanding, and acceptance.

By Emma Dunstan. thetwolittlehearts.com

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WIN

1 of 10 family in-season passes to When middle-schooler Emily Elizabeth (Darby Camp) meets a magical animal rescuer (John Cleese) who gifts her a little, red puppy, she never anticipated waking up to find a giant ten-foot hound in her small New York City apartment. While her single mom (Sienna Guillory) is away for business, Emily and her fun but impulsive uncle Casey (Jack Whitehall) set out on an adventure that will keep you on the edgeof-your-seat as our heroes take a bite out of the Big Apple. Based on the beloved Scholastic book character, Clifford will teach the world how to love big!

IN CINEMAS DECEMBER 30

Simply colour to win!

©2021 PAR. PICS.

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SUMMER SENSATIONS Summer is here and that means many things.

You’ve got warm sunny days, a chance to get out and have some fun and, of course, refreshing snacks. But is there a way both you and your kids can enjoy the delicious treats that summer brings without the guilt that tends to come from satisfying your sweet tooth?

The answer is frozen fruits.

Why are frozen fruits perfect for summer?

They taste great That’s right. On top of being cold and refreshing, frozen fruit keeps that delicious fresh taste. In fact, there are certain fruits that taste sweeter when they are frozen, such as bananas. Don’t believe us? Freeze a bowl of grapes, try them and tell us we’re wrong.

It also helps that frozen fruits blend together really well, making it easier to experiment with them and find the combinations that work best for you and your kids.

They offer variety You can leave pretty much any kind of fruit in the freezer for a couple of hours, and you’ll have a refreshing piece of delicious fruit that’ll melt in your mouth.

Then, on top of that, there’s all of the different recipes you can make.

Just woke up? Blend your fruit into a breakfast bowl or a smoothie, or even top up your pancakes, porridge and cereal.

Looking for a snack? Whack them in a bowl and eat them as is or add them to some Greek yoghurt.

Dessert time? The possibilities are endless with all of the baked goods, sorbets, ice cream, fruit salad that you can make.

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They’re a sustainable food option Frozen fruit is a great way to avoid throwing out food, as the freezing process also preserves the fruit.

So, not only will your fruit be available when you need it, but you’ll save money in the long run by not having to buy fruit that you might end up throwing out.

What frozen fruits should I try?

Great question! Here are some classic fruits that are perfect when frozen.

Acai This popular berry was introduced to the world thanks to Jiu-jitsu practitioners from Brazil.

Numerous cafes feature it front and center with their Acai bowls because its earthy, darkchocolate-like taste complements any other fruit perfectly.

Dragonfruit (a.k.a. Pitaya) Dragonfruit may be a bit obscure, but its pink colour and its creamy texture make it a perfect addition to any smoothies or breakfast bowls.

They’re also great to eat on their own, straight from the freezer.

Mango You don’t get the name “the king of fruit” if you don’t have the taste to back it up, right? Mango has been a staple of summer fruits for the longest time, but it’s also difficult to find when it’s ripe and in its prime. This is where frozen fruit has you covered.

Banana What more is there to say about bananas?

They are a great source of potassium, they’re a delicious fruit, and you can use them for baking as well. Think about all of the baked goods that can be improved by bananas, like muffins, breakfast bars, brownies, waffles and even cakes.

Strawberries There’s nothing quite like the satisfying crunch of a frozen strawberry. It helps that this fruit goes on practically anything, whether you want to garnish your cereal or blend a smoothie that’s going to stick with you for the rest of the day. Strawberries are hard to beat.

Blueberries Blueberries are great because, not only do they elevate any dish you can put them in, they also make for a great little snack on their own. That is, of course, as long as you’re okay with your tongue turning blue.

Avocado Yes, that’s right, you don’t need to limit your avocado to guac or being smashed on your toast. There are even more ways to enjoy this classic fruit appreciated by health nuts everywhere, and you won’t have to worry about them going off.

By Adam Bogatin, Founder of Morning Co and Purple Foods.

Making sure our customers wake up with a smile and look forward to breakfast is our number one goal. morningco.com.au

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Dear new covId mum Dear new COVID mum, I know what it’s like…

On behalf of the mums of the 294,400 babies born in Australia in 2020, also known as the ‘COVID Mums’, we would like to welcome the 2021 mums to the COVID mum clan!

For many of us, we were born with a strong maternal instinct and on average waited 11,498 loonnnng days, envisioning what life as a mother would be like.

2020…boom... COVID hit, and those dreams remained just that… ‘dreams’.

For ‘COVID Mums’, it has truly been a ride like no other. Picture this, a roller coaster ride that stops, starts, stops again… throws you off, cracks appear in the tracks, there is no safety harness holding you in, some of us rode a loop alone, the ride goes out of service, and we must wait months for repair.

Does this sound familiar? Instead of sharing your exciting news of pregnancy at a beautifully planned luncheon with your besties where you design announcement cards and strategically hide them under the cushions of each chair, you share your news over a Friday night zoom session.

Flipside, you got to take a still shot of the reactions of all 6 friends at once to post on socials, except the photo isn’t exactly flattering having mid facial expressions. So, scrap that idea.

Hey, it’s not all that bad. Instead of being stuck in the waiting room at pathology as you wait in between your blood sugar tests, you get to relax in the comfort of your car. Now that was a plus!

Instead of having your partner hold your hand and enjoy watching those squirms as you have your ultrasound check up’s, he impatiently awaits in the carpark for your Facetime call, 46

except there’s poor phone reception in the basement. Noooo!!!

Instead of driving to the office each day and holding back the vomit, you time the vomits in between the zoom meetings and so eloquently turn off the zoom camera to have a moment.

Instead of your colleagues seeing your baby bump growing, people forgot you are pregnant with your belly hidden below the computer screen. Let’s not forget the fact that your bottom half was already in maternity leave mode, as you rocked your comfy trackies and uggies, with your top half remaining corporate.

Instead of having to time your toilet shuffles to the closest facilities from your office, trying to locate a cubicle that has toilet paper available, you can dart across the hallway to your ensuite.

You pictured a perfectly coordinated baby shower and had purchased all matching decor, where you got to wear a beautiful flowing dress and a flower crown. Instead, you have a handful of your closest friends over and sit around relaxing and chatting in comfort. Again, not so bad, right?

Instead of having a baby sprinkle at work where everyone flocks to the boardroom like seagulls when they smell free food, your team coordinate a zoom session for you. Who would have thought we would be having zoom baby sprinkles… well we did! Yes, it was slightly awkward, however a cute touch!

Instead of being able to have your partner stay with you in hospital, and do tag team on resettling, some mums had to say goodbye to their partner once bub was born and endured that first night alone and afraid.

Instead of being able to have unlimited visits in hospital, you had to create a schedule of who would visit when each day and you had to have the awkward conversations as to those that didn’t make the cut. The plus side was that you didn’t have to fight off the herds of visitors when all you wanted to do was rest and select your next hospital meal as you made the most of being waited on.

Instead of siblings being able to meet in hospital, introductions occurred as you pulled up in the driveway at home.

Instead of your family living overseas meeting their new addition, so many of them are yet to meet them.

For me being the social butterfly that I am, I couldn’t wait to become a mum to join a mothers’ group. To find out that these mothers’ groups were on hold and instead there was an online catch up with the local mums’ and the clinic nurse… now that broke my heart! Luckily for me, after our SUPER awkward first zoom session, one of the mums’ arranged a face to face catch up and we haven’t looked back. Give it a go. You never know who you might meet!

Who else has been doing zoom baby catch ups? How grateful we are for technology that allows us to still be connected, oh I mean so the babies can see their friends right! I suppose it isn’t all that bad, that you could enjoy a vino whilst enjoying nursery rhymes!

Instead of having an epic first birthday party, you scrap that idea and start planning an epic second birthday party.

‘COVID mums’, I know it’s been a hell of a ride. Yes, it’s tough and feels so unfair, as if we have been totally ripped off. However, try and find that upside. In saying that, you have full permission to tell a non-COVID mum to go jump when they tell you they get how hard it is haha.

By Tammy Hewitt. Tammy is an Aussie mum, coach and mentor. Tammy and fellow mum Leah Riddell are behind the new community, The Pain To Power Sisterhood, a safe space where women come together, to support and empower each other in a place that rebuilds and focuses on hope for the future. www.mummalifeisnow.com.au 47

How Variety helps kids in need

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All children deserve the same opportunities in life. variety.org.au/nsw