mamatoga winter issue SARATOGA’S FIRST PARENTING MAGAZINE
2016
Come see why the new Bellevue is the Capital Region’s most popular place to have a baby.
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Eric and Chelsea DeSalvatore of Clifton Park have chosen The Snuggery to welcome both of their sons. A true “Snuggery Family,” Chelsea was also born here.
The Snuggery renovation project will be highlighted by the complete remodeling of all patient rooms, as well as the creation of two new nurseries and a new family and visitor waiting area.
AFTER 30 YEARS & 40,000 BIRTHS,
A NEW SNUGGERY FOR A NEW GENERATION It’s hard to believe it’s been three decades since The Snuggery at Glens Falls Hospital was born. Two generations of families have now taken their first breaths in our familycentered birthing unit. Now the time has come to welcome a new era in maternity care. Over the next year, The Snuggery will undergo a stunning physical transformation, bringing the comfort of our rooms and the quality of our technology up to the same high level as the care provided by our nurses, doctors and midwives. To improve our already special patient experience, The Snuggery renovation and modernization project will include:
• Complete remodeling of all patient rooms • New Newborn Nursery • New Special Care Nursery • New family and visitor waiting area • A reconfiguration of hallways for more efficient patient care All of the renovation work will take place in carefully planned phases to ensure the comfort of our families and visitors.
ARE YOU A SNUGGERY FAMILY? Look for our photo backdrop at special events across our region or share your own family photo on Facebook with:
#snuggerygenerat ons
YOU CAN HELP
THE SNUGGERY
The Glens Falls Hospital Foundation is inviting families with special memories of The Snuggery to help us continue and enhance our care for future generations. The Foundation hopes to raise $1.25 million from the community to help pay for the renovation and modernization project. If The Snuggery holds a special place in your heart, we hope you will help. Gifts can be made online at www.glensfallshospital.org or by sending a check to: Glens Falls Hospital Foundation 126 South St. Glens Falls, NY 12801 ATTN: Snuggery
GLENS FALLS HOSPITAL | 100 PARK ST. | GLENS FALLS, NY 12801 | (518) 926-1000
Letter from the Editor Everyone calls Saratoga Springs the “summer place to be”, but us locals know that the winter brings some really amazing things to do as a family as well: Victorian Stroll, ice skating in the State Park, Chowderfest. Everyone has their own winter bucket list here and I’m going to share mine with you guys to help you create your own. First, don’t miss the ice skating in Saratoga Spa State Park. You have to bring your own skates, but it is so beautiful, and it’s definitely one of those moments when you realize we live in a pretty amazing city. If you’re like me and you’re past the overpriced drinks in a crowded club type of New Year’s Eve, First Night Saratoga, one of the oldest and largest First Night celebrations in the country, brings together more than 15,000 revelers as Saratoga Arts presents over seventy regional and touring performing groups in thirty venues throughout Downtown Saratoga Springs. Fireworks in Congress Park at midnight and an evening packed full of live music, dance, comedy and magic in between, this event is a perfect way to start out the New Year. Chowderfest is another event that is beloved by locals (and beloved by all the other chowderheads that visit for this one event). Bundle up and bounce around downtown sampling the best our local restaurants have to offer. In years past we have done a much shortened version when we have the kids in tow, but it’s always a fun community day whether you sample the whole lot or just your favorites. As a family we literally hit up every ski mountain around. Willard for the school ski club, West for the littler kids, Gore for the bigger kids, we are all over the place. I always have to give a special shout out to the best ski shop around, Alpine Sport Shop, what a great example of a local, family owned shop that outdoes itself to give us all great service. So, while I know it’s cold and icy and gets dark by the time the kids get off the bus, don’t miss out on what our area has to offer in the winter, before long you’ll have your own family winter traditions that you’ll look forward to once the snow starts to fly.
xoxo Jenny 6 | MAMATOGA
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Jenny Witte
CEO & Founder
Jake Van Ness
Creative Director jake@graphicprecision.com
Mamatoga, LLC
Publisher publishing@mamatoga.com
Custom portrait painted of me and Welles by Jennifer Maher of Your Toy Portrait http://yourtoyportrait.com/
Contents
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10 Disconnect to Reconnect 16 Mamatoga Q&A: Kenny Goodwin Jr. 18 Standing Still 20 Adventures in Co-Parenting 26 The Fourth Trimester
56 Mommin’ Like a Boss
28 The Gift Guides
64 Recipe by Johnno Huss
52 Exercise Your Mind
66 Samantha’s Story
55 2017 Family Choice Award Winners
follow mamatoga online
calendar of events
Dr. Ashley Seaver Dr. Ashley Seaver is the owner and chiropractor at Spa City Chiropractic. She has a passion for helping moms-to-be have a healthy and enjoyable pregnancy from preconception through postpartum, and is also passionate about helping babies and children thrive through chiropractic care. She attended Logan College of Chiropractic, and has been trained through the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association. She resides in Saratoga, and loves spending her free time enjoying the outdoors, and all that Saratoga has to offer.
Heather Mudry Heather Mudry is the founder of Mama Malas. She craves connection, authenticity, the space to be creative, and wild expanding freedom. Her guilty pleasure is watching teen dramas that she is really just too old to be watching (I’m looking at you Pretty Little Liars). Through Mama Malas she designs mala beads and intentional accessories that celebrate Motherhood and give you the courage to follow your instincts, create a life and parenting style that work for you, and keep you aligned with your goals. She wants you to live in the moment, drop what is unimportant to play with your children and go on fantastic and wild adventures.
Julie Cox Julie Cox is a busy working mother to Jackson (14), Declan (6), and Beckett (4). She spends her time teaching high school English here in Saratoga Springs, driving her minivan all over Saratoga County, battling toddler bedtime, helping with math homework, and even attempting to crack open a good book now and then. She is a proud and decidedly non-evil stepmother and is thrilled to be working with Katie Nemer to bring their Adventures in Co-Parenting to the world.
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Jennifer Speulstra Jennifer Speulstra is a homeschooling mama to six kids, and lives in Clifton Park with her husband, Owen. She enjoys crocheting, the outdoors, and learning and living out all things natural. She meets with people individually or in groups, and hosts online classes to help them learn the many benefits of essential oils. Her website is www.anessentialbalance.com.
Katie Nemer Katie Nemer Katie is mom to Jackson (14), Zoe (6) and Preston (4). She is also co-author and columnist with Jackson’s stepmom, Julie Hahn Cox. Together the mom/stepmom duo share their journey learning to Co-parent successfully (and sometimes not so much!) who unexpectedly become friends in the process on their website adventuresincoparenting.com.
Jake Van Ness Jake is a graphic designer and the owner of Graphic Precision, a design firm serving clients locally and nationally. With over 17 years experience in the design and printing industries, Jake provides his clients with cutting edge branding and marketing design in print, as well as online. Graphic Precision has received numerous national awards for it’s design work, including five for the design and layout of Mamatoga Magazine. Having grown up in Saratoga Springs, Jake enjoys working as the Creative Director for a magazine based in his home town. Learn more about Jake and his design firm Graphic Precision at www.graphicprecision.com .
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Disconnect to Reconnect by Heather Mudry
H
ow many times have you thought to yourself “I need an extra day after that weekend!”? If you’re like me, the answer is probably too many to even count. Our weekends can sometimes feel more like “work” than our weekdays. Chances are though, if you did have that extra weekend day, you’d just pack more stuff into it, in an effort to “do more”. This coming weekend, instead of doing more, why don’t you try a “disconnected weekend”? Click through to learn more about this idea from Heather Mudry, the founder of Mama Malas. One of my favorite ways to hit the reset button when I’m stressed out is to make the time for a disconnected weekend. The disconnected weekend was started when I was craving a trip to the lake, but the logistics just weren’t happening. I started thinking what made me crave the trip, and the answer was simple. I wanted to disconnect. I wanted to spend time in nature, be out of my cells service range, and spend time laughing and connecting with my family. I think that is what makes most vacations so incredible. You have time to fully experience what is happening right in front of you, with who is in front of you, instead of checking your phone or zoning out in front of the TV. I realized that I didn’t need the lake to experience these things, I just needed to change my priorities while I was at home. That week I planned our first disconnected weekend. Now, I know you are probably thinking that there is no way that you could completely unplug for an entire weekend. I know that’s what I thought when I first started thinking of the idea, but I’ve since discovered that anyone can find a way to celebrate a disconnected weekend that fits their life. Now that we regularly incorporate disconnected weekends into our routine, I can tell you I am calmer, more productive and much less stressed than I was when I was connected 24/7.
When checking my phone, or looking up any useless question that comes into my mind isn’t an option, I feel like I have all the time in the world. We take walks to watch the sunrise over the mountains and spend time being tourists in our own city. When I’m not waiting to capture the perfect shot on my phone, I can fully participate in the sweet moments that make life so amazing. Below are the three steps I follow when planning my own disconnected weekend.
Set your intentions for the weekend.
Decide ahead of time what you hope to get out of your disconnected weekend. Do you want to have a calm and relaxed weekend at home or head outside and go on a great and wild adventure?
Decide how tech free you will be going.
Do you want to eliminate anything with a screen or do you want to eliminate phones but keep the TV? It will take a while to figure out what works best for you and your family, but I always recommend putting social media and email into the no list and only using technology for things like playing music when you cook a leisurely dinner or getting together for a family movie night.
Set yourself up for success.
Be sure to get any chores or shopping done before you disconnected weekend begins. You don’t want to spend your disconnected weekend catching up on chores or battling the crowds at the grocery store. This is meant to be a time for connection and relaxation. Write down all of the events you already committed to and the times and numbers associated with them. Download any recipes you plan to make, and any music you want to listen to, or movies you want to watch. On Friday evening take one final check of your accounts, and then put away your phone. (you can also choose to
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turn off cellular data and wifi so you are still able to send and receive calls and messages without dealing with notifications from social accounts). Set your phone to do not disturb mode so that it only rings for pre-approved contacts.
Have a pen and paper ready for breakthroughs that occur when you let yourself relax and disconnect.
If you find the idea of disconnecting all weekend too intimidating, set aside an hour on Saturday evening to check your accounts quickly. Don’t use this time to mindlessly scroll, just check that nothing urgent is waiting for you and then get back to your blissfully disconnected weekend. I guarantee that you will cherish the memories you make during your disconnected weekend much more than anything you would have missed when you were “away”. I find that the first time I tell people about my disconnected weekends, the response is “oh, that sounds nice but we could never do that, I’ll have to try when X is over”. The problem is that there is always going to be something going on, and there will never be a time where it seems easy to disconnect. It’s up to you to make it a priority. We live in a world where we are constantly bombarded with information in the form of social updates, emails, articles, and news. It is a necessity to take the time to recharge and take enough time to listen to the voice that is within. If you are looking to go a little deeper, I created a free Disconnected Weekend Workbook for you that you can download here. It guides you step by step through designing your own disconnected weekend, as well as a bonus checklist to help ensure your disconnected M weekend is a success.
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(L to R) Kathleen Murphy CNM,CLC; Stacey Lamar DrPH,LM,CNM; Jennifer Zella Kittell MS,CNM; Kim Elizabeth Schoch CNM,OB-Gyn NP; Barbara Smith-Foy MS,CNM; Sarah Ellen Gorham CNM
“As midwives, we take a real personalized approach to women’s healthcare. Our emphasis is always on you as an individual, taking into account both your physical and emotional well-being. We ask what you want for your care experience, and then we do everything we can to make that happen. That’s true whether you turn to us for maternity care, or care beyond the birth experience.”
(518) 363-8815 | 2911 Route 9, Malta | saratogahospital.org
CONFESSIONS OF AN
OILY MAMA by Jen Speulstra
I
’ve always been interested in natural ways, especially in caring for my family. So when my friend mentioned essential oils to me, I was interested from the start. The few years before beginning to use essential oils for immunity support, I felt we didn’t feel well most of the time. In a family with six kids, you can imagine when a sickness gets in here, it takes a while to march through the family. Honestly, I started using oils out of desperation to boost our immunity. We used them infrequently for a number of years, but we started using them consistently in March 2016, and when we began I am finding that by ridding our home of toxic using them consistently is when we saw the major things, in general our health is getting better. To help boost our immunity, we use Thieves proactively changes toward better health in our family. this time of year by diffusing it almost daily, and While I know in my heart and mind and somewhat applying it topically daily as well. Oregano is another understand the science behind why oils work – I’m powerhouse oil because it has anti-viral properties. still always surprised and downright giddy when they work. I think this comes from many years of For us, what has truly helped us use oils as a family living more conventionally instead of out of the box. is having them ready to go. Many oils, like Thieves, There’s a funny saying among those of us who use should be diluted before use as they are “hot” and oils - “there’s an oil for that,” and honestly? There are uncomfortable on the skin if not diluted. In our really is! From our emotional and physical wellness, family, you can imagine if I diluted an oil before each to cleaning supplies, bug repellant, support for my individual use, it would be time consuming. That is dog, and even beauty regimen – there truly is an oil why I love my roller bottles – I make blends to fit the differing needs of each of my kids, and they are ready for that! to go! This makes it easy for me as the mama, and By far, my favorites for myself are the oils that help them as the child. my emotions. I mean – I have six kids. Frankincense, Stress Away, Lavender, Release, and Progessence Plus To find out more from Jen, visit here online here M are probably my top five. For my kids, my favorites are http://www.anessentialbalance.com/ the ones that help us stay healthy, get better quicker and sleep better. Those are: Thieves, Tummygize, Owie, Snifflease, Cedarwood and Lavender. When cold and flu season hits, hands down Thieves essential oil blend is the number one oil that helps during this season. When we do get sick, which thankfully isn’t as often anymore, I will apply/ diffuse Thieves more often, and also use other oils for support. These include RC (which is similar to a eucalyptus rub), and a lavender/lemon/peppermint blend. These really help clear out stuffy noses.
MAMATOGA Q&A Kenny Goodwin Jr. Author of Cali Needs Her Rest
M
y kids have a favorite new bedtime story and this one gets bonus points for 1) Being about how important rest is and 2) being written by a local author about a local doggie! Cali Needs Her Rest was inspired by author Kenny Goodwin Jr.’s real dog Cali and helps children see the importance of getting their rest. The book is filled with fun illustrations, an absolutely adorable story and a dream diary that kids can record their own dreams in, and will be a perfect “something to read” gift for the holidays. I was thrilled to interview Kenny Goodwin Jr., author of “Cali Needs Her Rest” about what inspired him to create this super cute children’s book.
Mamatoga: Kenny, my kids absolutely love Cali and your book about her, how did you come up with the idea for Cali Needs Her Rest? Kenny: Cali has been a total character since the day I rescued her. I always wanted to find a way to share her personality and when my little cousins brought up the idea of making a picture book inspired by Cali, I thought it was a perfect match.
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M: Tell us a little about how you and Cali came together. K: I was living in Manhattan at the time and on a work trip in Atlanta, Georgia when my colleague brought to my attention there was a place where I could find a dog to bring home. I agreed to check it out and upon my arrival it was a giant puppy mill. It was so sad to see such an enormous amount of dogs in crazy conditions so I knew I had to do my part and get one of them out of there. Cali, a Yorkie-Poodle mix, was the only one not barking so I picked her!
M: What is Cali like personality wise? K: She is absolutely hilarious, super sweet and endlessly curious. She is an avid sleeper (hence the title of the book) and has a passion for squirrel chasing!
K: This is my first book! The challenge of writing this book is that I don’t have kids of my own but knew I had to learn how to effectively retain their attention graphically and in writing. I did some research on illustration styles, colors and then shared my rough drafts of the story with every mom that I could track down for a few minutes to see if it would intrigue their toddlers. M: What is one thing you would love to have children take away after reading this book? K: Just one thing is so hard! Getting your rest is so important. It’s fuel for your body. & if I had to pick a second take away it would be that bedtime isn’t a bad thing. It can be the gateway to amazing dreams. And I think we all should dream!
M: Is this your first time writing a children’s book? What challenges did you find when writing the book?
Put this book on your kiddo’s must read list, you can find it online here and also locally in the Children’s section of Northshire Bookstore on Broadway in Saratoga Springs. https://www.northshire.com/calineedsherrest M
Cali helps children see the importance of getting their rest!
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standing still by Bridgette Gallagher
“Bricks and mortar make a life. But the laughter of children makes a home.” – Irish Proverb
T
he traditions of travel are this: pack the bags, pack the car, get out the map, plan the stops, check in to the hotel or the inn or the RV park, plan meals, plan family games, plan outings, take lots of pictures. Make memories. Rinse. Repeat. Rinse. Repeat.
belongings are all little artifacts that make up the jigsaw pieces.
We, in this family, have the habit of loving old houses. Houses that need a lot more work than we can ever afford or have time to do. We’ve lived in the construction and around the construction in two different homes. As a woman and as a mother, as a teacher Our children have seen the changes that and as a vagabond-stuck-in-a-Gen-X’s body, come with taking out a wall or putting in a I find an interminable itch in me to travel. window. They know, like anything, our home It’s probably the busy-ness of our lives--- is always a work in progress. We like to think the work-school-family-fun balance that is our home is a reflection of our optimism, our so hard to strike. Being away helps you to dedication. Never finished, never perfect, but feel like you are released from your normal ours. responsibilities. No vacuuming. No dishes. No meal planning. No laundry. No rinsing, My mother lives in my own childhood home. no repeating. Your family gets a break. A The walls where I was held as an infant. The break you’ve looked forward to. A break you bedroom I spent blaring teenage music. The family room that held groups of friends for deserve. countless sleepovers and birthday parties. When I feel this itch lately though, I take Lately, I have realized how luxurious it is to the time to remind myself of this: to be on the be able to visit the home where you came of move is precious, but to stand still is sometimes age with your own children. To see them play necessary. Home is something to be cherished. in the same driveway and cu-de-sac, to see Homes are a delicately constructed puzzle. them ask where you slept, where your played, Your memories, your experiences and your where you walked when you were their age. 18 | MAMATOGA
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The comfort that returning to my childhood home brings me is hard to put into words. It’s nostalgia mixed with contentment mixed with a deep desire to hold onto your youth. In returning from the home where I grew up, I think about how I am making a place to grow up for Parker and Celia. The traditions we nourish, the laughter we share, the chasing we do around and around the downstairs “circle.� These are all things that make up a home. And, although travel has been a great friend to
us and has made our lives rich in experience, our home provides something different entirely. Lazy pajama mornings that turn into lazy pajama days, sticky cinnamon roll breakfasts, rainy day Lego building, mugs of steaming hot cocoa after snowman building, hot and humid afternoons pretending in the backyard, backpacked treks from the school bus through the front door, the smell of freshly popped popcorn for a night on the couch, gentle good nights in the hallway well after bedtime, a golden retriever who only goes to bed once we all are tucked in. M Rinse. Repeat. Rinse. Repeat.
‘Twas the weeks before Christmas, the rush in full swing, And of course, jingle bells is all the kids sing. The first time it’s cute; the second, not very, the third and the fourth time - we’re not feeling so merry. Such a fun time of year, the parties, the lights, Trips to the city to see all the sights. The bustle of holiday joy’s all around us! In coparenting-land it means we need a shuttle bus. Aren’t holidays magical? Eventful… exhausting… Filled with candles and sleighbells and red and green frosting. But the candles are hazards and those sleighbells, they linger, And the red and green frosting makes red and green fingers. Our friends will all tell you we love baking cookies We smell them, we eat them,we’re really such foodies, by the platefuls we give them, because we’re so generous; But that wine you should leave, ‘tis just for us. The snow, it’s so pretty - we love how it sparkles Sure! Stop on the Northway! Those snowflakes do startle. The traffic in Wilton is our favorite part We could reach Target faster pushing a shopping cart! There’s no time for cleaning, dust bunnies rejoice! The sink’s piled high, there’s really no choice. Egg nog is needed, so mine’s in a sippy Was Frosty the Snowman always this trippy? The big night is approaching, wow that came quick. And of course, inevitably, someone always gets sick. A quick dose of Tylenol. Now picture time - smile! I haven’t been this frazzled in quite a while. Holidays with kids can be quite the jumble It’s easy for us parents to mumble and grumble. The most wonderful time? Ha, we’re not sure we can deal. The presents! The pressure! The struggle is real.
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Then the big night, it FINALLY arrives We can’t quite believe everyone has survived, The presents all wrapped, the stockings all stuffed and we blearily think, enough is E-NOUGH! And then what, through our sleep-deprived eyes should appear? Those sweet sleeping faces, and finally, we cheer. Because the holidays are frenzied and crazy, that’s clear. But there’s no doubt in our minds - it’s the best time of year. The pure joy on those faces completely erases The anxiety that the holiday raises So calm down, parentals, take some time to relax As we know, oh we know, it all goes so fast. Our babies grow quicker than we could ever have guessed, So all we can do is keep doing our best Things aren’t always perfect, but they’re always alright.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah Happy Kwanzaa to all, and to all a good night.
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Looking to Buy or Sell?
The Fitch-Cummings Team Sara Cummings-Bauknecht Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Patrick Fitch Licensed Real Estate Salesperson Sara@Juliecorealty.com c: (518) 915.4446
"We ARE the Neighborhood Experts, because we’re your Neighbors!" -Sara & Patrick
in the club Book Club picks from Northshire Bookstore by Jennifer Armstrong
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The Geography of Genius: A Search for the World’s Most Creative Places, from Ancient Athens to Silicon Valley, by Eric Weiner
Ever wonder why so many great ideas seem to develop in the same places? This fast-paced, highly entertaining book travels the world to visit the origins of some of the most revolutionary and significant ideas in history. Lots of fodder for a lively conversation, even if you only have time to pick and choose among the chapters. Paperback nonfiction.
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The Elephants In My Backyard: A Memoir, by Rajiv Surendra
Did your book group read Life of Pi? Then you have to read this. While filming a movie ten years ago, the author was told by a cameraman to read Life of Pi, and thus began an obsessive quest to land a role in the film, a role he felt was his destiny. This memoir of that experience is a fascinating read, both poignant and funny and transcends the showbiz tell-all genre from the start. Hardcover memoir.
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The Gambler’s Anatomy, by Jonathan Lethem
A handsome, globe-trotting backgammon hustler with the ability to read minds discovers he has a tumor behind his eyes. His predicament sends him back to his hometown of Berkeley, California, and into the clutches of a shady high school pal who will foot the bill for a risky operation that threatens more than his life. Gorgeous writing and and unforgettable cast of characters slightly reminiscent of The Goldfinch, but much shorter! Hardcover fiction
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The Crossing Places, by Elly Griffiths
Archaeologist Ruth Galloway is called to assist the police when a child’s bones are found on the beach in Norfolk. Although the bones turn out to be those of an Iron Age child, there’s more to the story than Ruth realizes. Dig into this British mystery, the first of a riveting series. Paperback mystery.
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Vinegar Girl, by Anne Tyler
Pulitzer Prize-winner Tyler gives us a modern remake of Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew. By turns hilarious and wrenching, Vinegar Girl has all of Tyler’s trademarks (Baltimore setting, family dynamics, domestic dilemmas). You’ll have to decide whether to go read the original play next, or all of Tyler’s other amazing novels. Hardcover fiction
the fourth trimester By Dr. Ashley Seaver
First and foremost -- congratulations, mama! This is a very exciting time for you and your family. At times, I know it can seem a little overwhelming, so I am here to help! My main goal is to give you the knowledge so that you can feel and function your best throughout your pregnancy and after. During pregnancy, many women choose to utilize chiropractic care to help with common aches and pains that sometimes accompany pregnancy. This is a great option since it is gentle, natural, and safe for mom and baby. Since chiropractic works with the joints, muscles, and soft tissues that surround the pelvis, many pregnant women even report having easier and quicker births with the use of chiropractic. Not only should chiropractic care be a part of your prenatal healthcare, but it should also be continued after the birth of your little one. These aches and pains felt during pregnancy can often continue or even change after you give birth. Why does this happen? Shouldn’t the body go right back to where it was before you got pregnant? The short answer to this is: no. Here’s why… As most of us know, there are 3 trimesters in pregnancy, but what most women don’t think about is the 4th trimester, also known as the postpartum period. This is the period of time after pregnancy, where the body has to heal and reverse all of the effects of pregnancy. During pregnancy, the body slowly transitions as the belly grows. Overtime as relaxin, one of the main pregnancy hormones, circulates through
your body, your joints and ligaments become relaxed so the pelvis can make room for baby. As your belly grows your posture changes, increasing the stress on the low back, upper back, and neck. This is one of the main causes of pain during pregnancy.
1. A chiropractor, massage therapist, and acupuncturist that specialize in the treatment of pregnant and postpartum women. 2. An exercise class that is geared towards prenatal and postpartum fitness. 3. A doula to support you throughout your pregnancy, fight for your planned birth experience, and to help you settle in to motherhood 4. Talk with different midwives and obstetricians to find the one that is right for you. 5. Birthing method instructor to give you options of different birthing techniques 6. Lactation consultant to help with breastfeeding 7. Find time to meditate or do yoga to reduce stress and be one with yourself and baby. 8. Ensure that you and your baby are getting proper nutrition by seeking help from a nutritionist.
After you give birth, your body immediately loses at least 7 pounds, and most likely more between the baby and the placenta. Relaxin continues to remain in the body for about a year after birth, depending on the mom. During this time, not only is your body trying to revert back to its pre-baby status, but it is also going through a stage of healing. During this time, you must remember that your body has wounds on the inside that also need time to heal. After the birth of your baby, you are also placing different types of stress on your body. Some of these new stresses include; breastfeeding, holding your baby, carrying a car seat and diaper bag, pushing a stroller, changing diapers, and looking down at your cute new little babe. During this time, there is usually a lack of sleep and maybe a little bit of emotional stress, and both of these can contribute to how your body feels overall. So what can we do to help manage these new aches It’s important to keep in mind that everyone and pains? Better yet, what can we do to help experiences pregnancy differently, and that prevent these issues from arising? healing happens at different rates for everyone. The average time for postpartum healing is One of the most important things you can between 5 to 18 months. So remember to do for yourself and for your new family is to stay positive, stay patient, listen to your body, find a support team before, during, and after and have your support system in place. We pregnancy. I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but are all here to help you enjoy your pregnancy, to take care of your loved ones, especially your and to help you adjust and recover during the new baby, you must first take care of yourself. postpartum period. Now go and enjoy this time Plus, you’re a new mom, there’s no shame in with your precious new babe! having a little help from time to time! For more information about prenatal The following is a list of professionals that and postpartum chiropractic care, visit should be a part of your support team: spacitychiropractic.com or ICPA4Kids.org. M www.Mamatoga.com
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the gift of nature REFLECTIONS OF A FOREST KINDERGARTEN PARENT By Jenn Hunt Dempsey
E
very summer, my three kids go fishing with their dad and his uncle at Cape Cod. One evening years ago, they were out on the water after the sun had set. When they returned, they noticed the glow of jellyfish in the shallow water around the dock. My daughter Norah, who
was about six at the time, was fascinated. After she soaked in the sight for a while, she came running up to the house, her great-uncle close behind. Her face glowed with excitement as she searched for the words to tell me what she experienced. After a moment her uncle began to prompt her: “Remember what I told you that was? ‘Bio…,’ ‘biolum…,’” Norah visibly shook off his attempt to get her to reduce this amazing experience to a single word. She finally erupted: “It was like someone took a giant, magic glitter pen and drew a million sparkles all over the black water!” While I appreciated her great-uncle’s attempt to expand her vocabulary, I also realized how important it was for Norah, at her age, to not simply label what she just saw with an SAT word, but to experience and feel it. To digest it with her own mind and emotions and to draw on her own six years of world experience to articulate it as she shared it with me. That moment made me realize that when we are eager to define terms and place our own adult labels on things in an attempt to educate and inform, we rob children of the opportunity to learn things on a deeper sensory and even emotional level. We create “knowledge” but we limit true understanding. It was this quest for natural and authentic outdoor experiences for my kids that led me to being a
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Forest Kindergarten parent. After seeing the value of simple moments in nature for my older two kids, my husband and I jumped at the chance to take it a step further for our youngest, Cara. When it came time for her to go to school five days a week, we enrolled her in the Forest Kindergarten that had recently launched at the Waldorf school where our two older children attended. Established in 2009, The Waldorf School of Saratoga Springs’ Forest Kindergarten was inspired by Nokken, the oft-touted forest kindergarten in Denmark. At our Forest Kindergarten, children spend most of the day outside year-round, exploring 300-plus-acres of state park land on the southern edge of our small city. Nature is central to the Forest Kindergarten experience. Always changing, nature provides new problems to solve and situations to explore depending on the season and weather. In addition, the children enjoy many of the traditional Waldorf Kindergarten activities of free play, circle time, stories and puppet shows (all al fresco). A restored farmhouse provides a nurturing indoor space for lunch and respite from only the most extreme weather, but the vast majority of time is spent walking numerous forested hiking trails, climbing trees, gardening, digging, playing, and working in the yard and surrounding woods.
Whether they are building forts far back in the woods off the “Papa Bear” trail; feeding the chickens and rabbits that share their outdoor “classroom”; or observing the flight pattern of the honey bees in the bee yard on the edge of the property, the children are afforded a rich variety of natural, sensory experiences, as well as the time and space to come to their own understanding of them. Sunshine and mud, rain and snow, wind and mosquitos all combine to provide a sensory www.Mamatoga.com
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raised ranch. It was there that my friends and I spent most of our time — climbing cliffs and trees, “mining” garnets out of boulders with nails and rocks, and collecting salamanders, toads and garter snakes. While some kids are fortunate enough to still have that healthy, unstructured opportunity to explore this planet on their terms, most urban and suburban communities offer much more in the way of lacrosse leagues and piano lessons than cliffs and swamps. We also take part in those activities, always striving to keep the schedule reasonable and sustainable. But when I think about how strong my memories are of navigating that forest on our own – no trails, no interpretive signs, no coaches or counselors organizing us – I know the two years Cara spent in her own forest oasis will have just as strong of an imprint on her.
environment that is at the same time more complex yet less over-stimulating than the tile floors and fluorescent lights of a typical kindergarten classroom. For many parents of my generation, programs like forest kindergartens undoubtedly have a nostalgic appeal. Growing up, my suburban half-acre was augmented by a vast stretch of forest behind my
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But my aim in providing my kids as much of a nature-based childhood as I can goes beyond trying to create warm, fuzzy memories. There are physical and academic benefits as well. In recent years, child development experts have increasingly warned of the physical and emotional price we pay as a society when our children are too cooped up inside – from obesity to attention problems. In his book “Last Child in the Woods,” the Children in Nature movement founder Richard Louv points out: “Children need nature for the healthy development of their senses, and, therefore, for learning and creativity.”
Similarly, in his paper “What is Phenomenology?” Waldorf science educator Michael D’Aleo identifies nature as the optimal environment for a young child to develop the capacities needed for deep scientific inquiry later in her educational career. He writes: “To properly educate the very young child, it is not so much a question of ‘teaching’ but rather one of ensuring that the proper environment, one that is rich in sensations and also deep in context, can occur. Perhaps no environment can surpass nature in its richness of sensations or depth of context. Again, the key is not to teach the child to see the observations and then tell them the concept, but rather to allow this process to occur naturally while the senses of the child are developing.” As I witnessed my daughter and her friends bond with their Forest Kindergarten environment and make it their own naming their favorite trees, finding secret hiding places for mittens that would not be found until spring, becoming stronger and
braver and more resilient, I realized how fortunate she and I were to have access to such a unique program. Fortunately, the popularity of programs like our Forest Kindergarten and others that have launched since has caught the attention of policy leaders. Across the country, more and more governors are declaring “No Child Left Inside” months for their states. By the time the SATs come along, I am confident my children will be able to define and spell “bioluminescence” and even to explain the chemical process at work and name some of the various creatures who exhibit this phenomenon. But it will be that richness of sensations and depth of context in simple, special early moments like that night at the Cape that will allow them to truly understand it. My youngest was fortunate enough to have two full years of daily moments just like that at the Forest Kindergarten, and for that I will M always be grateful.
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EXERCISE YOUR MIND by Jess Updyke
Kids need a breather sometimes. We all do. There isn’t a set recipe or playbook for raising successful children. It can be a complicated balancing act managing our child’s after-school activities, musical lessons, playdates, and mix in a sporting practice here and there, not to mention homework. I am not saying it’s not good for them to have musical lessons, sporting activities and other things organized. It just becomes a problem when the child starts to believe that his or her performance determines their self-worth – I am as I can perform. Arguably, there may not be a right number of activities for every child as every child is different and can handle varying levels; it just seems that we have lost the ability to balance them with downtime and dare I say it, BORING time. In a world where electronics rule behavior and disconnection is a rising problem, our next generation needs to build the muscle of awareness. I remember being a kid and feeling like time moved so painfully and incredibly slow that I could just die. On a Monday, waiting for a sleepover at a friend’s house that Friday felt like an eternity. The gap between birthdays might as well have been decades. And once December hit, the anticipation of Christmas became a daily
punishment. It seems for a lot of us, we have lost that feeling of anticipation and wonder. Increasingly, parents and educators are turning to the practice of mindfulness and meditation to help children learn how to pay attention – to their thoughts, to their emotions, and to their bodies. The skill of paying attention can have a profound impact on how a child develops and learns, both within the classroom and outside of it. I define mindfulness as a quality of being – the experience of being open and aware in the present moment, without reflexive judgement, automatic criticism or mind wandering. Whereas I define meditation is the practice of actually being present in the moment, which in turn trains us to become more mindful throughout the day, particularly during difficult situations. “Pay attention, please!” How many times a day do we ask this of our children? The number is probably higher than we can count on both hands. It’s not an easy task getting those wandering minds to focus and those little bodies to be still. But what if part of the problem is that we’ve never shown children how to pay attention?
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People who are new to meditation think they can’t meditate because they can’t sit still and quiet their brain, some refer to that as “monkey mind.” I was like that too. My job is in social media – so I am constantly connected and reaching for my phone and multitasking and going down my to-do list and thinking a zillion thoughts. But using that frenzied lifestyle for an excuse is like saying “I can’t eat healthy because I only eat junk food.” May you have seen the viral articles on social media or the news about some schools who have replaced detention with meditation, as seen here. The results look promising and warrants further study in its application in schools. Giving kids the tools to help them fend off negative thoughts and behaviors, builds selfconfidence, focus, and treat others and themselves with respect and appreciation if a gift they will have for the rest of their lives. It’s hard to know where to begin. These practices are for children and adults alike and doesn’t have to involve a whole new set of skills. It’s best to not have any expectations for yourself or your children. Children younger than ten really only
need to focus on sitting for a small period of time and practice breathing. That’s it. Start off simple: 1. Take a seat. Find a comfortable place to sit crisscross applesauce. 2. Keep your expectations in check. Know that everyone’s mind wanders, even people who have been practicing this for years. It is part of what the brain does. Do not go into the practice-based mindset because that defeats the purpose. 3. Breathe. There are excellent techniques for children to easily understand how to begin to take deep inhales and exhales like The Balloon Meditation or Follow the Leader. 4. When you’re finished guiding your child through the relaxation technique, make sure they spend at least a few minutes in quiet, encouraging them to keep their breathing slow and steady.
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Children are prone to copying the behavior of their parents. So starting them on a meditation practice can be as simple as leading by example. When your kids observe you in meditation, its sets a tone that children can learn from. Each one of us is a source of inspiration. We all have capacity to understand those just a few steps behind our own personal journey of transformation and the ability to support, help and M guide them.
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mommin’ like a boss the juggle, the struggle and the beautiful (but tough) reality
by Jamie Davies, of 23rd [and Fourth]
I
have to say it, but if you’ve ever met me, you probably already know. There’s nothing more important to me than my family. Straight up, they are, and always will be my first priority— they are the loves of my life, my cheerleaders, my everything. But my business is important too, because it’s essential to the future I’m creating for my family. That “can do, will do everything” attitude my generation has plagued ourselves with, well, it’s tough. It’s hard to juggle it all. Like, really hard. With my first kid, my goal from the start was to have him with me day-in and day-out for that
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first year, and then look into daycare part time. This ended up working out perfectly. Once he turned one, we started putting him in daycare two days a week so he (I really mean we) could get adjusted to the change, and honestly, it was a big success. My mom and I could get more done at the shop and schedule appointments for the days he wasn’t with us, and best of all, he actually LOVED it. Don’t get me wrong, our customers missed seeing my adorable son when they stopped in our store, but this arrangement was just so much better life-wise. And then I got pregnant with my second, and I needed a new plan. My husband and I were insanely thrilled, but it meant more juggling. I knew there was no way I could have a toddler and a newborn
with me at the store and still function the way I wanted to as a designer and business owner. But I still wanted that same first year of close bonding with my second, that I had with my first. So we worked out a new plan. My eldest went to daycare/preschool full time, and my new little one came to the store with me… but WOW, was this time around different. I felt like a crazy person for a while, because the routine was so crazy/hectic. Pack up everything, leave house and get in car. Drop Kid #1 at daycare. Bring Kid #2 with me to work, and attempt to get stuff done, while also tending to him… did I mention that he needed a lot more attention than my first? Once it was time to head out for the day, I would go grab something for dinner with Kid #2 in tow, then pick up Kid #1 from daycare. Drive home trying to catch up on Kid #1’s day while Kid #2 screamed his adorable little head off. Attempt to make dinner, then juggle baths and bedtime stories until it was time for my absolute favorite… bedtime kisses. Loads of kisses for my two little boys. After which I would frequently fall asleep on the couch and wrangle just enough Z’s to do it all again the next day. Then I realized all this juggling was working, but it wasn’t working for me. That reality led me to do something I hadn’t planned on. Kid #2 started three days of daycare a week at five months old. First, know that I cried an insane amount of tears over this decision. I felt guilty. Why couldn’t I do the same for my second as I did for my first? Should I just quit my job and stay home with them full time? I constantly felt like the worst mom ever, like I couldn’t handle these two little balls of love. But that just wasn’t true. I was handling, I just knew
I could handle things better. I could devise a plan that kept us all happy, sane and cared for in the best possible way. And that was the thought behind this decision: happy, sane family. Happy, healthy family. Happy, healthy me. My mother reminded me that as I get older, the flexibility that comes along with this business will actually work out really well—I’ll be able to drop things on an afternoon and attend school plays, or reserve evenings for soccer practice. Right now would be hard—growing this business would be hard—but it would be worth it. I realized my kids won’t remember me holding a rattle, or teasing them with a stuffed animal at noon on a Tuesday. What they will remember is me cheering them on from the sidelines, or helping them pick out the perfect outfit for the first day of school, or their first middle school dance. And they’ll remember me dropping everything to ease them through their first heartbreak. Mommin’ like a boss means knowing when to give something up—and being able to choose the right thing to give up. It’s also like 99% organizing like a pro, 200% accepting yourself, and 100% recognizing that you are doing way more than you think you are. And in the end, that’s the mom I want my kids to remember. The mom that balances work and play to lead a great life, alongside their dad. The mom that showed them early on that you can achieve great things when you put in the hard work and dedication to make your dream a reality. Because that’s exactly what I’ve done, and what I’m working toward M every day.
#MomPower #BossLady #love #blessed
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Playmat Set
Gabby Bernstein’s Spirit Junkie Necklace
Pleated Chiffon Skirt Teeny Yogini Kids Tee
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USB Leather Tassel Keychain + Charging Cord Hamsa Silicone Teether
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Matching Outfit For Her and American Girl Doll
Christmas Pajamas
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Catherine Mom to Posey
Passport Cover
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Plan Toys Sailing Boat-Penguin
9 Miles East Farm Meal Mix Cooler 4 week subscription
Badger Stress Soother Stick Nuroo Nursing Scarf-Indigo Diamond
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Tri-Color Building Sticks
Hazel Village-Gwendolyn Raccoon in Oatmeal Romper and Bonnet
Peppa Organic Crocheted Hedgehog Rattle Little Unicorn Marindale Backpack Diaper Bag www.Mamatoga.com
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Orbit Key Finder
Little Passports Subscription
DROP Bottle
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Mom to Rowan and Bodhi Love Warrior Book
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Lego Yellow Submarine
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Little Giraffe Pink Chenille Robe
Chelsea Kitchen Set from Pottery Barn
Lucy
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Twisted Band Ring
Mom to Lily
Plaid Blanket Scarves
Maileg Sleepy Wakey Bambi Doll
Cozy Layering Thermals
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Johnno Huss Johnno Huss really started talking an interest in cooking at the age of 4 by following his mom around the kitchen, helping mix and prep and taking an interest in recipes and labels. By age 6 he asked his Nana to build him a custom bake sale stand as he was tired of selling just lemonade and hot chocolate and wanted something where he could sell his cupcakes, cookies and baked goods. His first successful bake sales created a desire to open his own bakery...with mom & dad convincing him to stay in school for the time being instead. So he pursued another outlet for his passion and decided he wanted to teach other kids his age how to cook too! At the age of 8 he has already taught his first two cooking classes at Healthy Living Market and Cafe’s Learning Center, designing his own custom recipes that he could share and teach other kids how to make. Under the guidance of the Learning Center & Kiya McIntyre, he continues to hone his skills as a chef and educator. Stay tuned to Mamatoga for a great new series featuring Johnno and his passion for cooking.
CINNAMON PUMPKIN SPICE POPCORN Recipe by Johnno Huss Note: This recipe can be prepared two different ways. For advanced kid chefs it is prepared stove top in a covered pan using Avocado Oil to cook the corn. For beginner chef ’s, you can substitute a good healthy plain microwave popcorn! INGREDIENTS: • 3 Tablespoons Avocado Oil • ½ Cup popcorn kernels • ¼ Teaspoon salt • ¼ Teaspoon pumpkin spice • 2 Teaspoons sugar • 1 Tablespoon avocado oil (for drizzle) DIRECTIONS: Stovetop 1. In a covered wok or large pot, pour 2 tablespoons of Avo oil 2. Turn burner onto Med-High & at popcorn kernels 3. When oil starts to get hot start moving pan back in forth (with cover on) until corn has stopped popping or slows down a lot). Turn off heat and leave covered. 4. Mix Pumpkin Spice, Salt & Cinnamon Sugar in a separate bowl. 5. Drizzle w/ Avo oil. 6. Mix/Shake and eat!
Post Partum Depression: Samantha's Story By Samantha Konikoff
I
was first diagnosed with Anxiety and Depression when I was 19 and put on medication. At 26, I decided to stop my meds and try life as an adult without medication. I was fine for years. At 30, I got pregnant with Evan. I knew I had a higher chance than others to have PPD when Evan was born. With my history and my family’s mental health history (Mom is bipolar), I was more likely than others. I read Brooke Shields book, Isaac, my husband and I talked about what would happen if I started showing signs, I mentioned it at a lot of my OB appointments. I thought, I will totally know if this happens to me and stop it before it can start. I felt like the OB office didn’t even make a note in my chart about my concern. Evan was 5 days early and came fast. Minus me being sick thru the delivery, labor was quick and no complications. He did have to go to the nursery for a little to get his body temperature up since he was running a fever when he was born and they cooled him down too quickly. He wasn’t there that long and Isaac was with him. I think the anxiety and crying all started at that point of being left alone in a room without my husband and newborn son. When Evan was put on my chest, I didn’t have an overwhelming feeling of love. I had in my head we would be in love the second I saw him, and that never happened. I was so worried about him latching since I knew there would be issues from my breast reduction when I was 18.
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The nurses and lactation consultants worked with me in the hospital and showed me how to use a nipple shield and everything. I still would get super anxious every time I had to feed him. I was lucky to have an amazing nurse that first night who helped so much with feedings and then saw how exhausted I was since by the time my son was born I had been up about 24 hours. She took Evan to the nursery and let us sleep. This nurse knew what I needed. When we got home, the crying didn’t stop. We got home from the hospital, got settled and put Evan down in his pack n play. All swaddled and I could have sworn that he rolled! In panic mode, I made my husband rush out and buy a wedge so he couldn’t roll around. My mom took a picture of me and Evan on the couch and you can see the tears coming down my face. I was so scared. What was I doing? How could I be responsible for this little human? Could I really do this? Things just seemed to progressively get worse for me and my moods. Evan wasn’t one of those babies who took to sleeping quickly (7 years later it’s still an issue). When he would wake up for a feeding, diaper change or something, we would take care of him and put him back down in his crib that was attached to my side of the bed. I would stare at him until he would fall asleep. I wouldn’t sleep unless he did. What if something happened and I was sleeping and couldn’t help him, what if he died from SIDS because I was asleep and couldn’t save
him? That would make me the worst mom ever! I needed to make sure he was breathing so I would hold my breath until I could make sure he was ok. This was nightly. So me and sleep were not on the same page which I am sure made all of this worse. The crying continued. I remember finding any reason during the day to hide up in my room alone. My mom was in town helping and would come to check on me and I would just loose it. Sobbing and sobbing. I also hid in my house if Evan would start to cry. I would go to the bathroom or just try to avoid him. I didn’t want to be near him in fear that he didn’t like me or need me. I thought many times how I should just pack up my car and drive away. My husband and son would be so much better without me here. I was just making things harder by being a bad mom. Breastfeeding was a big trigger for me. It never went smoothly and became a trigger for my anxiety. I always thought that breastfeeding was supposed to be this beautiful and bonding experience with your baby. I was so wrong!! I ended up reading lots of books while feeding. Evan had his eyes closed so I figured that this wasn’t a bonding time because he wasn’t trying to look at me. I also had a low supply and little did we know he had a dairy allergy as well. Evan’s first bath he screamed and I got so worried, that I yanked him out of the little tub and yelled at my mom and Isaac and took Evan into another room with me. Here I was over protective, yet didn’t want to be near this little baby. About a month after Evan was born and my mom had gone back home, she called me one day and told me to call the dr and get some medication or something, but I wasn’t acting normal and something needed to change. I called Evan’s Dr since she was a GP on a Friday, late afternoon telling her something was wrong and I needed meds. She put me on zoloft. I didn’t go to therapy. I stopped the meds after 6 months and
within a month or so was back at my dr knowing my anxiety and depression had crept back. This time I decided I needed to see a Psychologist to help with my depression. I found the right meds to keep me functioning and finally about a year or two after my son was born, I was ready to go to talk therapy. I am in my late 30’s and have been going to therapists on and off for 30 years. I know the drill and didn’t want to talk about my feelings around the time my son was born. I was happy with one kid and felt it was enough. Then when he was about 2 ½, the biological clock started chiming..LOUD and next thing we knew we were pregnant again. I stayed with my Dr’s throughout the pregnancy even though I stopped my meds while I was pregnant. I was doing good, pregnancy was perfect and then we found out we were having a girl. I was so mad and sad and heartbroken. I wanted 2 boys, I didn’t want a girl. I was really scared I was going to hate her and be jealous of her and my husband’s relationship. I don’t have a great relationship with mine and he moved away when I was about 9. I grew up with a dad who wasn’t very involved and lived far away and here our daughter hit the daddy jackpot. I couldn’t see the greatness of the fact she was getting what I never had, all I saw was I would hate her. I was induced with Emma a day after her due date. Everything went well. No crying or anxiety. I was asked if I wanted a social worker since my chart stated that I had PPD with my first. I hadn’t needed it since my therapist and psychologist knew i was having the baby and were aware I could call them any time. Luckily my PPD didn’t rear it’s ugly head this time around. I went back on meds quickly and when breastfeeding wasn’t going well, I wasn’t worried about anything and got Emma on formula. What I think was also different for Emma was the help i had in place once she was born and not just the professionals. I had a meal train my friends had started, my “mom friends” who were helping with Evan and we hired a night nurse one night a week. All of this I believe helped me with M not going down the same road again. www.Mamatoga.com
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