Mars' Hill Newspaper Vol 21 Issue 6

MARS’ HILL VO L U M E 2 1 ISSUE 6

NE W S EXUAL ASSA ULT P OL ICY T W U MOVES TO I MP L E ME N T SE X U A L A SSA U LT PO L I CY PG. 6

DREA MS

THE LOSSES W E L IV E

J A NU A RY 25, 2017

T HE I N T R U DE R

S T ORIE S OF L OS S , G RIE F, A N D FA IT H

REF LEC T I NG ON GH OS T LY VI S I ONS EX P ERI ENC ED DURI NG S LEEP PARALY S I S

PG . 1 0 - 1 1

P G. 17

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THE TEAM JOEY SCHWEITZER Managing Editor

FR OM THE EDIT O R

SARAH WRIGHT Visual Editor

“When we flush the toilet, excrements simply disappear out of our reality into another space, which we phenomenologically perceive as a kind of a netherworld, another reality […] and the ultimate horror of course is if the flushing doesn’t work, if objects return, excremental remainders return from that dimension.”

— Slavoj Žižek, The Pervert’s Guide to Cinema IVET ALFARO Layout Editor

MARIAH SCHUURMAN Chief Copy Editor

RYAN SCHAFFRICK

Advertising and Finance Manager

DAYNA SLUSAR Online Editor

TORI NIKKEL Photo Editor

MADISON HIGGINBOTHAM Illustration Editor

In the 2006 documentary The Pervert’s Guide to Cinema, psychoanalytic philosopher Slavoj Žižek discusses the relation between what he calls the ‘sublime realm’ and the ‘excremental realm’ by analogy of the ever-utilitarian and ever-taboo water closet. In the passage quoted above, Žižek explains that, in order to maintain the fantasy of the immediately visible world as a sublime and blameless reality, we immediately discharge the waste our bodies produce within it. Waste only exists in a not-belonging to this clean and orderly reality, and therefore is negated unto an other-real, more precisely a nether-real, out of sight and out of mind. There is no greater horror imaginable, then, than the rupturing the sublime realm by having excrement returning to it from that nether-real.

What does this have to do with the theme of dreams? Reality as we conceive it, delimited by structure, order, and rationality, has the structure of fiction. Our stringently ordered reality, symbolized in the expellant capacity of the water closet, barely keeps at bay our most potent emotions, illicit desires, and gross array of childhood baggage that lies beyond—or rather, beneath—the surface of propriety and convention. It is no wonder, then, that what emerges in dream is precisely those submerged, ugly things we hide beneath our conscious displays of functionality. Dream is a wound in reality, through which pour out our hidden insides, the bowels and entrails of our unspoken fears and unspeakable desires. Upon waking, we peek at this mess between the fingers shielding our eyes, horrified yet transfixed, wavering between repulsion and attraction. We quickly attempt to dissolve the phantasmagoria of taboo topics we tried so hard to expel, only to find that they continue to return to the surface—like excre-

ment that refuses to flush.

This sort of thing, in my life, lies in the submerged grief that I would prefer to ‘flush’ out of reality. Unfortunately, but inevitably, lived losses always eventually rupture the surface of waking life. It assaults you at inopportune times. A certain smell, object, or movie scene triggers a memory that suddenly has you weeping, at the office behind your desk, and you call the hospital because grief has such a physical quality that you think you are having a heart attack. You wake up on a day when you have three classes, and in your dream, your mother just died. It was a dream, but even after all those years it feels like it just happened.

At the start of the day, it has already defeated you. You stay in bed and curl up with the pain and take an absent in your courses. You tell your friends you have the flu.

When it takes the absurdity of a surreal, shifting dreamscape to address what is most disruptive in our lives, we might wonder if we don’t have it all upside-down. Does not the dream disclose The Real, while reality takes absurd, ‘dreamlike’ leaps and bounds to avoid confronting our ‘waste’? This brute disruption of the functional fantasy of waking life is a nightmarish confrontation that discloses the inverted state of our perception of reality.

I will end this with another quote from Žižek, this time from The Pervert’s Guide to Ideology: “Perhaps we shouldn’t react to these heaps of waste by trying to somehow get rid of it. Maybe the first thing to do is to accept this waste. To accept that there are things out there that serve nothing, to break out of this eternal cycle of functioning.”

MARS’ HILL

MISSION TO MARS

EDITORIAL POLICY

CONTRIBUTORS

Mars’ Hill is a student publication of Trinity Western University, floated with funds raised by the Student Association. Mars’ Hill seeks to be a professional and relevant student publication, reflecting and challenging the TWU community, while intentionally addressing local, national and international issues.

The mission of Mars’ Hill, as the official student newspaper of Trinity Western University, is to inform and entertain its readers, cultivate awareness of issues concerning the TWU community and provide a forum for purposeful, constructive discussion among its members in accordance with the Community Covenant, Statement of Faith, and Core Values of the University.

Mars’ Hill encourages submissions and letters to the Editor.

Mars’ Hill reserves the right to edit submissions for style, brevity and compatibility with the Mission, Statement of Faith, the Community Community Covenant, and the Core Values of the University.

Anonymous authorship of any material may be granted at the discretion of the Editor-in-Chief.

Opinions expressed in Mars’ Hill belong to the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the editorial board, Trinity Western University, its officials or its Student Association.

Cam Thiessen Chrisaleen Ciro Ariel Little Joelle Wyminga Joel Redekop Eric Stein Nikki White Amy Visser Sarah Powell Amy Best Neilson Dr. Allyson Jule Emma Dumitra Ryan Domingo Leanne Witten Liesel Giesbrecht Cheyanne Makelki Jarrett Fontaine Bailey Broadbent Lindsey Iman

MEDIA ADVISOR Loranne Brown

What is the Worst Piece of Advice You’ve Ever Received?

7600 Glover Rd, Langley, BC, V2Y 1Y1 604-513-2109 marshill@gmail.com www.marshill.com

COMMUNITY CORNER

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C O M M U N I T Y CO R N E R DE-CLASSIFIEDS

SUBMIT YOUR DECLASSIFIEDS AT: WWW.MARSHILLONLINE.COM/DE-CLASSIFIED

I loved Trinity because we didn’t have a dress code and it was different than a regular private school. Now I can’t even wear a razor back to the gym?

This is ridiculous.

Can we just admit that Mrs. Anonymous is on a roll right now #thankyouverymuch

Krystal Brock and Francesca Abiusi a double date with your two favorite people is needed.

I ship G and M #littlepeoplebigworld

Okay... I got 98 more days to find my husband before I graduate. Any takers?

Come to Fraser apartment 231 for free cookies and good memories!!

My knees are weak from leg day, not by seeing female shoulder blades To all the single females I will be in the gym from 7-8 everyday. :)

If everyone on campus agreed to not date for a year and just make friends, we’d all have actual friendships. Just saying

Is being drunk in the holy spirit considered breaking the covenant..? #seriouslyconcernedpentacostalstudent.

I have a dream that one day Trinity will be free from the tyranny of Sodexo... #martinlutherkingjr

You know RNT must have some super special faculty when so many of them don’t feel a parking barrier applies to them.

University: where you learn to make showers last a whole week

Napkin Guy here, I still have no clue to who you are. This is definitely playing hard to get at a new level.

Gian, when I saw you skating on that pond, I lost my heart.

Look no further for your wife Boys can still be half naked during banana challenge and fort week but God forbid a girl shows her shoulder blades at the gym. #doublestandard

How to get a girlfriend; join mars hill. Right Joey?

Can we all agree that tinder isn’t that bad. Give it shot, whats the worst that can happen?

All upperclassmen singles need to plan an event.

Andrew DeGroot is very cute.

I wouldn’t pay $400 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth.

Brandon Bustard, https://youtu.be/Q8r5aneX_AY #letsbefriends Dear Napkin Guy, my New Years resolution is to be more brave: 778 887 2657

To my secret admirer, who sent me a Candy-gram, You lost me at “your presence could be my present” Nonetheless, please reveal yourself.

Sincerely, the girl who rocks Neufeld.

“That moment when your roommates make it look like you quoted yourself in the last De-Classifieds.” - Taylor Switzer when every other facebook post is a kermit meme does it ever not rain

Shoutout to all the dudes in Nursing. Y’all have made an excellent choice. #wivesfordays Shoutout to the long haired boy that made eye contact with me outside TUWSA. I was just wondering if you could hold something for me, perhaps my hand. #heartsparkle *Gets a boot put on their Mini Cooper outside Northwest* “Well, I guess it’s time to get a new one.” *Abandons car forever* NANCY REMEMBERED MY NAME!

“My legacy is so strong it stinks” -Neil Turner To the guy I sat behind in class today: you lost all attractive points when you started googling “love tattoo cursive font” Bre Lai, do you know how to play a musical instrument?

“Ya, I can play the recorder”

Living with a community bathroom has improved my awareness of people’s sock fashion ;) ladies, just let your eyebrows grow with the flow #feminism Dear Joel Gajdos, Hey. Yours truly, M

Mars’ Hill editors reserve the right to edit or reject submissions based on content and/or length. A printed submission does not necessarily reflect an endorsement of any kind, nor does it necessarily reflect the opinions of Mars’ Hill staff, the student association, or that of the University. In fact, probably not.

IN MEMORIAM:

A STORY FOR RINK NIKKI WHITE I should have eaten breakfast, I thought to myself that morning. And had fewer cups of tea. By the time I realized this it was too late, my name was being called and I headed toward the stage. My hastily-acquired black pumps were a size too big. “Oh please, oh please, oh please,” I prayed. “Don’t let me be trip.”

My mind’s eye was caught by my ex-supervisor Rink Beeksma, head of Trinity Western University campus security. I imagined him smiling encouragingly from the front row. “You can do this,” he seemed to say, nodding firmly. How many times had I heard those words from this man over the course of my five-year employment at TWU? And he had always been right.

When, after the economic crash of 2008, I had squirmed at the thought of becoming a security guard to pay for

my daughter’s education, Rink had chastened me. “All work is honorable,” he said. Later I was to hear his own story of immigrating to Canada from Holland, leaving behind a well-established career as a police officer to come and pluck weeds in a British Columbia nursery, thankful and happy to be useful to his family in this new country. Point taken, boss.

in academia, Rink poked and prodded at my ego, insisting that no one was too old to go back to school. Once enrolled in ACTS, when the complexity of my course schedule, family life and church ministry made me irritable, demanding, and sloppy with my duties, he reprimanded me firmly and fairly, then bent over backwards to accommodate my dreams.

When I balked at the gauche unfemininity of the department’s uniform, Rink reminded me that people ought not to even notice the uniform, only the love of God in my face. When, in the miserable loneliness of the nightshift I wept over my sore, arthritic feet, I remembered Rink weeping quietly over his siblings, saying, “I just want them to know my Jesus.” When I cast longing glances at seminary students happily submerged

I left the Security Department a scant few weeks before Rink moved to the Okanagan, and finished my degree shortly after. “What will you do with your degree?” he asked during those last days together. “Everything, better!”

I replied, laughing. “And what will you do in Kelowna?” I asked. “Everything that God asks of me,” was his smiling reply. We did not know, then, that God would ask Rink to walk through a dark

“Go to school.” — Kyle Guenther

valley, and when I later heard about the cancer, I was horrified. Not him, not that, not now, I cried. As I write this, I still weep, but they are gentle tears shed for his wife and children, mourning the loss of this fine man who passed away Friday, November 18th 2016.

When my name was finally called, that day on the stage, it was Rink’s voice that I heard in my mind. I shook the hands of wise and wonderful professors, men and women who, like my boss, had urged me to do justly, love mercifully, and walk humbly with my God. But it was Rink’s hand that I sought. Rink had helped to open up a whole new world to me. I am confident that his Jesus has likewise opened up a whole new world to him.

Rink, I am so blessed to have known you, even for a short time. God, you are so lucky to have him forever.

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KELSEY TUFFIN

NEWS

De ar s t udent s o f T ri ni t y W e ster n Uni v ersi t y , To begin the new semester, we as the representative assembly of the Trinity Western University Student Association (TWUSA) have decided to update you with a progress report on our work behind the scenes in the fall semester. As in previous years, our aim is to continue providing you with the best services we can offer: events, coffee, printing, rentals, The Cube, Mars’ Hill Newspaper, Pillar Yearbook, etc. Our council agreed in September that we wanted to make this year remarkable for every student, however they choose to use the services we offer to the student body in general.

Like every job or student leadership position, no one knows what to expect before they begin.

Likewise, when we began our roles with TWUSA at the beginning of the year, we were presented with the challenge of recovering from a sizeable deficit of $19,073 that had accumulated over the years. There are a few reasons behind the development of this deficit. One of the contributors we identified was the reduction of TWUSA’s student fee in around the year 2003 from approximately $73 to its current rate of $65 for full-time students. This reduction combined with general inflation has increased TWUSA’s general expenditures resulting in a considerable gap between what TWUSA needs to operate and sustain the quality of service and the actual financial resources. For instance, catering is one of the primary points of cost for TWUSA in putting on events. Inflation has caused a major increase in spending in this area since the student fee was lowered. The cost of general supplies for the office and events has also grown significantly. In addition to these financial challenges, TWUSA aims to continually find new ways to more effectively serve the student population. One avenue by which TWUSA has done this since the student fee was lowered was the addition of free coffee and printing to its repertoire of services. Coffee and paper both come at a cost, and with the increasing student population, it is no easy task to choose to offer free coffee and printing on a reduced budget.

Fortunately, this year we have found many ways to reduce our operating budgets and make do with the minimal resources available to us while continuing to provide the services students have come to appreciate.

We knew that the first step to changing our situation was to know precisely what we were doing and how to go about doing it. To that end, our council has decided to create a more robust partnership with the TWU Finance department and consistently involve them as advisors in our financial decision-making, providing insight and second opinions as needed. We are also incredibly thankful to Mars’ Hill and their efforts to support us this year by finding methods to significantly reduce overall printing, team, and advertising costs. Similarly, Pillar Yearbook has found a way to operate with a smaller team and reduce the overall cost of producing this year’s yearbook through a variety of means. These efforts by Mars’ Hill and Pillar have been extremely helpful to us.

“ [ W ] h e n w e b e ga n ou r r ol e s w i th TW U S A a t th e b e gi n n i n g of th e y e a r , w e w e r e p r e s e n ted w i th th e c h a l l e n ge of r e c ov e r i n g f r om a sizeable deficit of $ 19 , 073 th a t h a d a c c u m u l a te d ov e r th e years.”

“Hey, you should play boom cup with us!” — Martin Garcia

As a non-profit organization and private institution, TWU thrives because of generous donations by those who believe in its mission. This year, TWUSA was the recipient of an anonymous donation that has covered our deficit. This has allowed us to operate the remainder of the year without the burden of debt and take steps to ensure that TWUSA will be sustainable going forward.

Resolving the deficit was step one, but the gap between spending and income remains a problem to be solved. As it is, our operating budget is still unable to sustain the services and events we offer to the student body. In consideration of continuing to offer quality services like free coffee and printing, the Mars’ Hill newspaper, Pillar Yearbook, events, etc., TWUSA will be raising its student fee to a total of $75 for all students effective next year. The last time TWUSA adjusted its fees was over a decade ago, and based on our current budget and the general trajectory of inflation, we estimate this relatively small increase in fees to be adequate to cover the cost of TWUSA’s expenditures for another decade. We strive to let students make the most out of what TWUSA has to offer.

After much thought and careful consideration, we have deemed these changes to be in the best interests of all students at TWU. We look forward to serving and providing you with the best possible experience at this university.

Sincerely, TWUSA

NEWS

H ow i s y ou r $6 5 st ud e n t fe e sp e n t ?

TWUSA’s budget is supplied by the $65 student fee every TWU undergraduate student pays. So how exactly is your $65 being spent this year?

TWUSA: $37.68 Administration: As an association, TWUSA requires a portion of funds for maintenance and function. This budget finances the free printing and coffee, office renovations and other general office upkeep.

Stipends: Each member of TWUSA receives a leadership grant in order to reflect their position as a student leader and to aid them in furthering their student endeavours.

Faculty Reps: The faculty reps each have their own private budget with which they can host events and bring in speakers to foster community and learning within their respective faculties.

Communications: TWUSA uses the Communications budget primarily for publicity and advertising, creating effective means of communication between TWUSA and the student body.

M a rs’ hill: $1 1 .87 Pillar : $ 15.45 Publication costs: This represents the cost of printing approximately 1,300 Pillar Yearbooks that are distributed at the TWUSA annual Year-End BBQ. Stipends: Positions on Pillar receives a student leadership grant in the form of a stipend, to build and sustain the quality of work that Pillar produces each year.

Equipment: Updating and maintaining the equipment that makes photographing, editing and designing the yearbook possible.

Events: From Banana Challenge to the Christmas Gala to Hootenanny, this budget funds many of the large events which make this campus unique.

Student Proposals: The proposal budget is a sum of money set aside for student initiates. If you have a fun, creative event that caters to large portion of the student body, then this is the place to get funding.

“Take GEO 121.” — Alex Gust

Publication costs: Mars’ Hill Newspaper produces 12 bi-weekly issues throughout the year, including the Freshman Issue.

Stipends: Each position on Mars’ Hill receives a student leadership grant in the form of a stipend, to compensate the workload and commitment each individual displays during the production of the newspapers.

Equipment: This year Mars’ Hill invested in a new camera. The rest of these funds are intended to cover all the background costs required for successful newspaper production, including basic and necessary supplies for the office, ACP membership, and stationary.

Production Weekend Food: During Production Weekend, the Mars’ Hill production team works at times that the cafeteria is closed. To sustain the editors in their work, a food budget is allocated for each production weekend.

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NEWS

assault at TWU with specific protocol, or because TWU is being pressured to create a policy along side other B.C. universities, I am glad that measures are being taken.

I spoke with Kelvin Gartley, Director of Community Life, about the creation and implementation of the new policy. Before it became required by the BC government, Gartley and a team of others began discussing the possibility of said policy.

There has been an increasing focus on preventing sexual assault in higher education across North America, but Gartley said that incidents on our own TWU campus have also propelled the conversation to begin and move with more momentum.

“The way that we had dealt with any kind of sexual assault or violence or something of that variety, was by looking through our community covenant,” Gartley said. “Because students aren’t even supposed to have consensual sex outside of marriage, we have an ability and freedom to hold students accountable for sexual misconduct in general.”

Gartley said that there is a spectrum of what sexual assault looks like. “On the far end you have rape,” he said. “But at the other end you have things that are less horrific but still not appropriate.”

TRINITY WESTERN UNIVERSITY MOVES TO IMPLEMENT SEXUAL A S S A U LT POLICY When looking at the current Student Life policy, the only area where sexual health and/or harassment is addressed is in the Healthy Sexuality component. I am not writing this with the intention of berating Student life or administration, however, I have been concerned at the delay of TWU’s implementation of a cohesive sexual assault policy.

On May 19, 2016, British Columbia responded to the staggering numbers of sexual assault cases in the province, and subsequently has made an intentional call to introduce

Bill 23, the Sexual Violence and Misconduct Policy Act. This Act pertains particularly to post-secondary institutions and how they are required to respond to all forms sexual misconduct, including sexual assault, exploitation, harassment, stalking, exposure, voyeurism, distribution of photos/videos and attempts or threats of sexual assault.

With the implementation of Bill 132 in Ontario (which has the same regulations as BC’s Bill 23) Ontario Lawyer Andrea Lowes highlights the Bill’s intentions: either on or before May 18, 2017, each public post-secondary institution in BC must establish and implement a sexual misconduct policy that addresses sexual misconduct, including sexual misconduct prevention and responses to sexual misconduct.

Bill 23 specifically pertains to public post-secondary in British Columbia, however, Trinity Western University is following suit and intends to install sexual assault policy within the allotted time. Whether this is out of intention to create a structured response system to potential sexual

This is where I take issue. Sexual assault is sexual assault, and No means No. When we compare this understanding of sexual assault with the University of British Columbia sexual assault policy, for instance, UBC does not discriminate between degrees of what constitutes sexual assault, stating that “sexual assault is any unwanted sexual contact within or outside a relationship.”

I have an affinity towards the UBC policy, because clearly states that anything that falls under this category will not be tolerated. I believe that there is no such thing as a spectrum of assault, because any type of sexual assault is unwarranted in equal degree. By creating varying degrees of assault, there are more opportunities for victims of assault to feel judged and questioned to whether an assault has taken place.

The reality is that each sexual assault victim has had their own traumatizing experience and I don’t think that should be held against what is seen as ‘morally permissible’ or ‘healthy Christian sexuality.’

The idea of a scale is irrelevant

“Go on a blind date.” — Braden Rosenfeld

when it comes to the crime of sexual assault. If no consent has been given, the circumstances around that assault are irrelevant. For example, a worker in the sex trade can file criminal charges for sexual assault, regardless of their occupation.

“THE REALITY IS THAT EACH SEXUAL ASSAULT VICTIM HAS HAD THEIR OWN TRAUMATIZING EXPERIENCE AND I DON’T THINK THAT SHOULD BE HELD AGAINST WHAT IS SEEN AS ‘MORALLY PERMISSIBLE’ OR ‘HEALTHY CHRISTIAN SEXUALITY.” You can sign whatever covenant you want, but the truth is that we need the safety net of a policy. A policy ensures rules and regulations that require compliance, and if you don’t comply, there will be consequences—regardless of moral or circumstantial interpretation of the context. If we know that fire burns wood, do we not need a fire department? I mean, the goal is not to have fires in the middle of kitchens in the first place. But sometimes things happen. Fires happen. And we need a proper response to the crisis.

Breaching the Community Covenant of TWU does not mean you have lost your right to claim sexual assault, but this is exactly what the current lack of policy suggests. I’m glad that implementing a sexual policy has become a requirement of post-secondary institutions across Canada, and that TWU is following suit. The courage required to confront sexual assault should never be met with the questioning of the legitimacy of the victim’s claim.

KELSEY TUFFIN

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CHRISTOPHER TOWNSEND

ACADEMY

THE INtTRUOER

A FEW THOUGHTS ON SLEEP PARALYSIS

CAM THIESSEN The room is dark and I am asleep. This room is not my bedroom, but it is. I look around quickly upon the return of a strange sound, a static click that sneaks its way behind the sound of my movements in bed. Something sentient is in here with me. I turn to my window, which is not in the same place where my window usually is. A flower sits on the still in a small orange pot, and as I stare at it the static click becomes faster and faster. Suddenly, the flower flashes red and the click becomes a demonic scream.

My whole vision goes red for a second and I am unable to move. My body convulses and shakes uncontrollably. I try to yell for help but I cannot move myself to speak.

Then I see it. The dark figure stands about two feet into my room—now my room looks as it properly ought to. I am awake—near the doorway. The Intruder.

It stares at me as I shake, but I cannot see its eyes. Finally, after what was likely only a few seconds but felt like an eternity, I am released, and the intruder sulks out of the room with a casual hastiness. I heave air back into my lungs and curl up into a ball. I am horrified. Afraid to return to sleep for fear that my paralysis and its intruder might return, my first instinct is to pray. My second instinct is to scold myself. I know better than to think that what I have experienced is supernatural.

But the truth is I don’t know any better.

For the following two weeks, I research my new condition. My research is unorthodox and admittedly unhelpful in terms of diagnosis and treatment, to the point of triggering further episodes of sleep paralysis (SP). Rather than diving into the difficult readings in psychology journals and online information sources, I find myself captured by the stories

told in online forums moderated by SP victims. The film The Nightmare (2015), attempts to contextualize similar episodes with interviews of SP victims in which they describe their experience, as I just have. I am enthralled as these participants share their stories of alien abduction, demon possession, shadow people, and the like. They are convinced of the reality of their experiences, some claiming that they have even developed forms of clairvoyance through these dreams. While fascinated, I remain unconvinced of the supernatural element of these experiences.

I am not the only one who sees the shadowy figure during episodes of SP. In fact, it is so common that psychologists have named it "The Intruder," and there are multiple possible explanations for the hallucination. SP is a psychological anomaly which occurs during onset or offset of the Rapid Eye Movement (REM) cycle—in other words, falling asleep and waking up. In a way, the term "sleep paralysis" is redundant: humans are naturally paralyzed as they sleep, preventing harmful movements during unconsciousness.

One theory suggests that SP occurs when a person’s awareness is activated, but the brain has not yet taken them out of paralysis. The awareness of the paralysis itself creates Fight-or-Flight-responses in the brain. Hallucinations likely occur for a few reasons. The temporoparietal junction, which is the section of the brain often linked to Out-of-Body Experiences (which I have had during sleep in addition to paralysis), plays a role in distinguishing the self and connecting it with the body. During SP, this distinction of self is not fully active, but the person is still aware. The Intruder represents a

projection of a generic neural construction of the body in the superior parietal lobe. And that is how it is explained.

I cannot act as though I fully understand many explanations of SP. But this issue of sleep paralysis raises an important question. To what degree does my cultural narrative, the ideas imbedded in my subconscious by the things I believe, contribute to the way I understand sleep paralysis or The Intruder? If I were still more subscribed to charismatic Christianity as I was in my teens, would I view these episodes as demonic attacks (as has been done throughout history)? The mind is powerful, but I am convinced that it is not to be trusted. The human mind can cause cult members to feel euphoria, as though drug-induced, by simply being around their leader. The human mind can convince itself that it has left its body and is hovering above it. I am forced to wonder to what extent my religious experiences—the feelings of euphoria during worship, a momentary supernatural healing of a physical ailment, the conviction that I literally “heard” the voice of the Holy Spirit—are mere projections of a mind more powerful than my own composure. On the other hand, perhaps praying The Intruder away would not be such a bad idea.

“When you’re getting bullied, just agree with whatever they say — it’ll make them intimidated.” — Jared La Mar

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ACADEMY

The Semantics of feminism CHRISALEEN CIRO

By the end of this article I hope to be prepared to make a declaration. However, now it is time for confessions. My first confession is that I have a history of struggling to claim the title “feminist.”

My struggles are purely semantic. Intellectually and spiritually, I am already a feminist. In spite of this, these semantic struggles prevent me and other women from embracing the title of feminist.

Many women claim to disregard feminism because they don’t “need” feminism. Supposedly, those qualified to utilize feminism were suffragettes, politically marginalized women in developing countries, and abuse victims.

There have been many superior articles responding to this sentiment. Instead, this article seeks to explore the semantic idiosyncrasies of the word itself.

Put simply, the use of “feminist,” or a word like it, sets feminism apart from other civil rights movements. While other civil rights movements are more likely to use words like “racist” or “homophobe,” the primary noun associated with feminism is “feminist.” Other civil rights movements have nouns for those they disagree with. The word “disagree” here means to understand the other to be corrosive to civil society and their fellow humans. Feminism has a term, or what I would prefer to call an identity, for those they agree with. A person who “agrees” here indicates someone who takes an active posture to reconcile an inequality among human beings.

This may seem like merely an innocuous discrepancy of language, but I believe that this could go a long way in explaining what is at the heart of most women’s struggle to embrace feminism.

When these civil rights movements create terms for certain types of people, they encourage society to understand them as other. Words like “homophobe” and “feminist” alike here have the effect of settling these characters as separate from society. They suggest that society is joining forces with the civil rights movement to exile their people creating inequality in society.

Feminism, on the other hand, casts its allies as the “other.” That use of language suggests that people who claim that title are external to society. In some ways, it seems that feminism does not partner with society in rejecting dissenters, unlike other civil rights movements.

Instead, feminism seems to find fault with society itself.

Feminists seek to change society, but this is often seen as though civil decency is impossible without their intervention. This could be part of the reason

why feminists are often understood to be rebellious, aggressive, or even hateful. To some, it might seem that one has to leave society in order to be feminist.

This does little to recommend partnership in feminism to women. It is perfectly understandable that women would be wary of joining a movement that seems to operate outside of, or even antagonistic to, civil society. It does seem a little strange, having to subscribe to an ideology or take on a new identity when they just want to treat people with dignity.

Finally, I must make another confession. This will not be the first time I call myself a feminist. However, this exercise of reacquainting myself with the struggles of young women exploring their gender politics has given me increased empathy for women who position themselves outside of feminism.

Jiro’s Sushi Nightmare CHRISTOPHER TOWNSEND Given the New Year, and talk of resolutions, I hear quite a lot regarding self-improvement and the pursuit of excellence. But what does excellence look like? Does losing ten pounds, reading a book a week, or saving up for a trip to Europe mean that one is somehow a step closer to “excellence”? Does excellence consist within one particular trait, such as one’s preeminence in the field of literature? Or, rather, is excellence a more general quality that consists in the sum of all of one’s particular merits?

Regarding the nature of excellence, I believe that the 2012 film Jiro Dreams of Sushi provides a surprisingly rich and provocative commentary. At its bare bones, this food documentary catalogues the personal and business life of a world-renowned sushi chef. Watching the film, it becomes immediately obvious that this man has achieved one of the highest positions of dignity, class, and respect within his craft. From the purchase and preparation of his ingredients to their presentation, Jiro has achieved something close to perfection.

Every single element of Jiro’s craft is emblematic of serious dedication and attention. For instance, he takes to massaging out the tough and rubbery texture of raw octopus following a technique that takes him nearly an hour; he roasts his nori over Japan’s finest charcoal; and, more surprisingly, he even seats his guests in accordance to their handedness, for he understands that there is a nuance to the sushi experience between a left-handed and right-handed individual. In order to truly achieve excellence, dedication and discipline

“Be roommates with Joey Schweitzer.” — Joel Gajdos

must pervade each and every minute detail of Jiro’s world. As is suggested in the name of the film, the chef’s pursuit is relentless: following a long, hard day, Jiro’s work continues even as he dreams.

All of this, of course, is presented in cinematic beauty. Close-up shots of deft hands masterfully producing nigiri and sweeping angles of laughing guests all make up rich and aesthetic scenes— even Jiro’s bike ride to the fish market is backed by the modern symphonic works of Phillip Glass. Ostensibly, the film and its story are as inspiring and beautiful as they are entertaining. However, if one is able to look past the smiling chef, close their eyes and ears to the film’s composition and score, as well as actually pay attention to the narrative, one finds that there is an altogether more harrowing side to the film.

Underneath the sensational portrayal of Jiro is the story of a broken man who has sold his soul for mastery in the sushi world. This world is indeed quite small, as it is entirely devoid of that that colours human experience: others. In his pursuit of excellence, Jiro is forced to jettison his friends, family, and all those who hold him dear. He loses himself in sushi to the point in which his family falls apart. While becoming a world-renowned chef, he too becomes an absent husband and father. What we are left with, then, is one who is extremely callous, cold, and entirely self-absorbed.

Even in his restaurant he looms over his workers and is openly dissatisfied. People fear him, some even hate him, but I guess that is the price one must pay for greatness.

ACADEMY

THE FORGOTTEN LESSON OF

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight Except for us intrepid literature students, I doubt that many people have read the classic chivalric romance Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. This is a great loss for everyone, as the poem is both beautiful and exciting, but in particular I think it is a loss for modern Christians. To provide a quick plot summary: Sir Gawain is challenged by the mysterious Green Knight to give a deadly blow to his neck and then receive one in return. In a remarkable twist, the Green Knight survives the beheading and tells Gawain to find the Green Chapel and meet him there in a year and a day or else be dubbed a coward. Now to modern readers, it will probably seem exceptionally daft that Gawain followed through on the challenge simply to maintain his reputation, especially when the Green Knight was obviously not playing fair and square. However, for Gawain the honour-based code of chivalry was the highest ideal of how to live one’s life and was completely worth dying for.

As Christians, do we not also believe that there is in fact something worth following no matter the cost or how foolish it may seem? Sir Gawain models spiritual courage and dedication to pursuing the right in a way that I believe is very encouraging for modern Christians and parallels many of the trials we face in following Christ.

Instead of being foolish, Sir Gawain’s acceptance of the Green Knight’s challenge is actually his being bold in the presence of suspected evil. For the Green Knight is entirely green, a colour associated with paganism, and a user of magic, both of which, at the time this was written, would

have implied that he was malevolent—as much as a person walking into a gas station wearing a ski mask would today. Gawain also accepts the challenge in order to protect King Arthur, his beloved uncle and the person who initially accepted the challenge, from treachery. Finally, to top it all off, Gawain’s promise is referred to as a covenant, the most serious of vows a person can make to God. What causes Gawain to accept the dare—resistance to evil, self-sacrifice, and integrity—are all traits venerated in Christianity, and that most of us, if I am not mistaken, aspire to. The fact that Gawain’s actions appear ridiculous on the surface is a powerful reminder to us that following God’s will does not always appear glamorous or, necessarily, even rational.

I think the most inspiring part of Sir Gawain’s tale for modern Christians is his persistence in the face of every possible obstacle. Gawain perseveres through a wilderness filled with ferocious beasts and violent wild men during the freezing Northern England winter. Yet he is sustained by faith and spiritual courage alone. Even after Gawain is given an easy way out, when his guide promises to keep it a secret if he breaks his word and does not meet the Green Knight, Gawain resists the temptation to turn back. In my eyes, Gawain’s most difficult obstacle is actually the one he faces before leaving Camelot: discouragement from his close friends. While Gawain is preparing for his journey, the courtiers of Camelot make numerous comments to encourage him to choose personal security over duty.

The courtiers even employ the old carrot-and-stick method by tempting Gawain with a vision of a magnificent future and contrasting it with the prospect of a meaningless death. I believe that, for a lot of us, this is a great deal like the whispering voice at the back of our minds: the voice that always tries to convince us to turn back. Our good knight, however, manages to push through whatever echoes his friends’ comments may have in his own mind and continue pursuing the right path.

Now it is extremely important to note that, like us, Gawain is not perfect in spite of his courageousness. Although he does eventually set out on his quest in earnest, Gawain hangs around court until he has only one month left to find the chapel. Like most people, Gawain is highly reluctant to do something potentially fatal even when he knows it is the right thing to do. I think that, ultimately, this is an encouraging thought for those wrestling with their fears, for despite his reluctance Gawain is still able to succeed in his quest. Now, I am not saying that anyone should be reckless: ignoring the advice of wise friends and putting their life in unnecessary danger. Rather my aim is to encourage my fellow Christians through Gawain’s example of spiritual courage in the face of trials: trusting that “His faithful servants God / Knows well how to defend.”

“Don’t“What answereven Joey’s is the question, bottomline you won’t questions?” get in.”-Eric — Mathew Stein Kim

ARIEL LITTLE

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I’m a 20-something student at Trinity

Western Univeristy and I’ve lost both my parents. Though my title as orphan doesn’t define me, it certainly has shaped me.

Life with loss is hard. Everyday since my parents’ passing I am faced with their absence. When it comes up in conversation, people are shocked and often speechless. If people are strong enough to handle the discomfort, they will continue to ask questions. How did this happen? Do you have siblings? Where is home for you?

The last question is probably the hardest to answer because it causes me to feel displaced, alone, unsafe and fearful. I crave home, a place of safety, and to exist without explanation. I recognize my intense longing for places of safety, and the caution to which I enter every human relationship since losing my mom in 2010. I hold onto the hope that one day I will create my own family and sense of home, but for now I am restless in the in-between, often wondering where I truly belong and what is safe.

I FIRST CAME FACE-TO-FACE WITH THE TERM

My life experience has caused me to be weirdly obsessed with understanding grief. I have sought out like-minded young adults who share the experience of loss, and the formation of a group on campus that is called “Dinner Party.” Through gathering over a meal, I have found a group of students that truly empathize with me and understand the struggles I face daily. I suppose this is the silver lining to grief: solidarity without explanation is found in the shared experience of suffering. This group continues to be an important part of my time at TWU, reminding me to hope.

ALINE BOUWMAN

Take a moment will you, listen to our stories. We ache to be understood. Please don’t keep death at a distance; engage with us or anybody you know who is grieving and we will both be blessed.

AMY VISSER ANOTHER THING CROSSED OFF THE LIST. Another tie severed from the past. I’m left slowly but steadily drifting towards what is unknown, due to the inevitable passing of time. Time does bring healing, but it also has a way of tearing open old wounds.

My chest was broken open in one swift moment—such an immense pain that I couldn’t always feel it. I couldn’t feel much of anything. 2230 days, or six years, 3 months and 17 days has caused the cavity that holds my heart to heal; not to its original form, but rather with a couple bones out of place. Each time I face inevitable transition and loss, my life hurts for what once was: my home where his laugh could be heard, my sweet kitties whom he loved (and cursed because they would be under his feet every morning), and my childhood where his hugs were felt. His absence has been my nightmare, but I have seen him in my dreams. There he will live with his warm, timeless spirit connecting to my mind fixed in its linear experience.

“orphan” when I received an official letter three months after my mother passed away in 2007, after a six-year struggle with cancer.

The letter’s contents described that as a “half-orphan” under the age of 18, I was eligible for government financial support. When I received it, I felt like looking around the house for the person this letter was addressed to, because it surely wasn’t me. It gave me an identity that I had not yet come to terms with.

Orphan. The term was all-too-familiar by the time my father also died of cancer in 2014. Another letter drove the message home.

This time I did not have to look for the person the letter was addressed to. That was me.

DAVID WAS MY SONG-SINGING, BEAR-HUGGING,

adventure-seeking, joy-giving big brother. On December 11th, 2009, I received the phone call that would change my life forever.

The pain of its news felt like something had just stabbed me internally. David had been killed in a tragic car accident returning home from an exam, at 22 years of age. My mind was in such turmoil.

“How could a good God do this? Did he not have a plan?” I relentlessly replayed and questioned the events. I had always heard of other families who lost siblings, but that was never supposed to happen to us. That should only be something you hear about and then feel sorry for the poor family from a distance.

Everything in the world seemed to turn grey. I honestly didn’t know how I was supposed to function as a normal person my age.

Did I need to pretend as if nothing happened and that I was okay?

I learned how to tie on a smile and say “I’m good, thanks!” No one would want to hear that months had passed and I still felt the stabbing grief. The Bible talks about receiving beauty for ashes. In time, I learned how to recognize that beauty—to actually look for it. Experiencing joy doesn’t mean that grief leaves—it really does stay years longer than I’d like it to and comes up at the most inopportune moments. The truth is, not a day goes by that I don’t miss David, but through the pain of his death, I’ve learned the goodness of God in my suffering and the urgency to live life to the fullest as David did. There is beauty and joy mingled with everything in life—all of the suffering and grief, if only we learn to look for it.

SARAH POWELL

My heart longs for him, the way it longs for what I have known, loved and called my own. He was, is, and will always be my dad.

KELSEY TUFFIN

“Take PHIL 210.” — Lincoln Nikkel

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Grief is something we all experience.

It’s a heartache that can’t be cured with some Ben & Jerry’s and a good cry over The Notebook. Unfortunately, grief is like a month straight of rainy days. It’s a stomachache that doesn’t go away after a few minutes of lying down; a fatigue that persists even if you stay in bed all day.

What’s more, God can’t protect us from experiencing grief, pain, or sorrow. While His Son took on the sin of the world for us, He couldn’t eliminate all the inexplicable, dreadful, gut-wrenching trials that we’re all bound to come face-to-face with. Since I was 14 and could comprehend my ‘series of unfortunate events,’ I constantly turned to Romans 8:28.

Truthfully, I always took this passage as meaning God will work my life’s circumstances into something better than they presently are. I wanted a quick fix, and you know what? In the darkest and deepest of holes where I didn’t want to be reasoned with or told how great God is, that’s what I needed to hear. “I’ll get you out of this. I’ll make it better.” I could stand by a God who was a helper, a God who helps us in the midst of our total gong-show, ugly-crying episodes.

I spent seven years thinking that’s all Romans 8:28 meant “God will fix it.”

Well, after some ‘not so cute’ mental break downs on the back field at disgusting hours of the night, dropping out of TWU for what I thought was going to be a year, travelling 7,235kms across the ocean, and re-discovering the character of Jesus, I finally had the mindset to read Romans 8:28 for what I think God intended it to mean. It’s not about fixing our circumstances; it’s about crafting us into people who can take on the worst the world has to throw at us. The works that God is performing are Internal. His works will mould us to be more Christ-like through our hardship.

of like-minded souls to really do this. Maybe it takes an entire afternoon and gluten-free pizza. Maybe it just takes knowing that speaking about our loved ones is our favorite thing to do. If you’re ever at a loss of words when a friend loses a parent, it’s a powerful and meaningful thing to say ‘tell me about her’ / ‘tell me about him.’ No matter how much time passes, speaking about the ones we have lost can bring us a kind of joy and peace, knowing that we were so lucky to have them at all—and, for a time, all to ourselves.

Dr. ALLYSON JULE “GOD, THe crazy chef” The taste that intimately dwells in me recalls the flavours of a time now gone.

A liturgy of love, it’s heavy thrum the passing sounds: sweet boredom, steady song.

I am reconstituted, long to settle, if You would only stay Your twirling hand.

You’ve tested all my limits, all my mettle is worn out; now revive! I understand that all the flighty measurements fall short to capture why You’ve done these things to me, or let them happen; tasteless plots You wrote, complexly contradict that blind I see.

With spice and seasonings You wildly flavour what I must grasp and slowly learn to savour.

EMMA DUMITRA

AMY BEST NeiLSON

“The reality is you will grieve What do you say to someone who has forever.

You will not ‘get lost A PARENT? over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss yoU have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same again.

Nor should you be the same nor should you want to.”

Elizabeth Kubler Ross

On a cold Sunday afternoon last week, four TWU students came to my place to talk about grief. Like them, I too had lost a parent before I turned 20 years old. They came to eat pizza and hang out.

I had prepared a ‘few words’ to share about my journey without my mom; she’s been gone over 30 years now. I guess you could say I’ve learned a few things about navigating sorrow. As I thought about what to share, it came to me that one of the best things to make me feel deep peace about the loss of my mother is when people ask about her. So, I shared a lot about her, like when my mother was born, where, under what circumstances, and what the trajectory of life had been until her death as a young woman in her 40s. I then shared what others knew about her (she was a nurse; she played the piano) and then shared what only I knew about her as her daughter (that was feisty yet fragile) and then I shared about the particular times I have missed her afresh (like having my own children). I finished off with funny things my mother would say, like “time to go up the wooden hill” which meant it was time to go to bed, even though we lived in a bungalow. Preparing to share these aspects of my mother with the students was a real delight for me, not a sadness. Of course, I’ve never gotten over her (we never do ‘get over’ people like that)—but I have gotten used to it. Talking about her keeps her close.

I have noticed over my lifetime that it’s hard to talk much about my mother. Even with my own father and brother who miss her dearly, mentioning her is filled with a kind of sadness and we say too little about her. What I noticed on that cold Sunday afternoon was how healing it is to really, really talk about the person we are now required to live without. Maybe it takes a certain kind of group

If you have faced a recent loss, and are interested in joining our group, please contact me at amy.visser2@mytwu.ca and I would be happy to connect with you!

“Go swear at that guy so you can reintroduce yourself.” — Hannah Stover

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Mars’ Hill: What is your connection to Trinity Western University?

Sheldoncole: My connection began with my parents who met at TWU. It had always been on the radar and when I graduated from high school in Oregon I decided to leave for Canada and attend TWU. I studied music for two years and lived in 6 Low and then Robson. I also played in SNA during my second year and led a discipleship group. Though I only was there for a short stint, I loved every moment at the school and made some incredible friends there.

MH: Why did you choose music? (Or did it choose you?)

SC: Music as something that I do never really felt like a choice, actually. I think I was really lucky because my dad and uncle are both musicians, and I grew up in the church, so music seemed to permeate my life from a young age. For as long as I can remember I loved to sing and had a desire to do it for a living one day. When I got older my parents enrolled me in a school that incorporated singing into a lot of its elementary curriculum and had mandatory choir from

Kindergarten to Grade 12. I was blessed with a lot of opportunities to grow as a musician because of this environment.

MH: Describe where your music has come from stylistically, and where it is going.

SC: In high school I drew a lot of inspiration from the vibes and writing of Jack Johnson and then later City and Colour. Josh Garrels and Noah Gundersen have been influences, but I am also really into hip/hop and rap. About a year ago, I started getting really into electronic music and then stumbled upon an album by Arca called Mutant that really changed my perspective of what forms music could take. While living in Detroit I picked up some gear to start producing rap beats and that transformed into creating my own electronic music. When I got back to Vancouver, my brother joined in my music pursuit, bringing along with him harmonies, ambient electric guitar, and some sweet melodic guitar riffs. He also encouraged me to experiment with the new gear I had, and we began to fuse our singer-songwriter vibes with some electronic ambience and soundscapes.

Figuring out the fusion is definitely the direction we are heading now.

MH: What would your perfect show look, sound, smell, feel like?

SC: It would be in a space that wasn’t typically used for performances like a warehouse or a tattoo shop or a barn.

There would be a really intricate set design with some sweet stage lighting. There would be rows of old comfy couches and everybody would get free tea, and wine.

MH: If there were one thing that you would like to communicate in your music, what would that be?

SC: I think that what I want to communicate in my music and with my music are two different things. With my music, each song tells a different story, and my hope is to share with someone the same feeling that I had in my heart when I wrote that song. Using my music, though, the only thing that I want people to know is that Jesus is real, he died for me because I am broken so that I could be in right relationship with him, and He is healing my life and has given me hope and purpose. It is because of this change in my life that I seek to love people and serve, and this gift is free to anyone who comes to Jesus. He wants you even when you don’t want yourself.

MH: Being an artist is hard. What makes it worthwhile for you?

SC: The best experiences in my life have been while I was on the road playing music for people. I get so much joy from performing and I don’t think that I would ever be fully satisfied if I was not pursuing music while knowing that I could. I also love traveling, road trips, and meeting new people. Put this all together and the equation is simple: music is just irresistible. I will probably not make a lot

“Yea dude, it’s deep enough. You just have to go for it.” — Declan White

KIRSTEN MCALLISTER

ARTS & CULTURE

of money, but I will be happy, and most importantly, I will be using what God has given me to share hope with a world that is craving for something real to hold on to.

MH: Tell us about your vision for 2017.

SC: Currently my brother and I are working on our second EP. This one will be more representative of our current sound because Nic was not actually on the Detroit EP. We are going to continue to play house shows in as many cities in the Lower Mainland as we can. We are also working on branding our motto “Love Over Hate,” and putting out an ethical clothing line, using a portion of the proceeds to give to the International Justice Mission. Then in the summer we are going on our first Pan-American tour.

MH: What is your advice for aspiring student-musicians like yourself?

SC: Don’t be afraid to go for it! What is the worst that is going to happen, honestly? I have lost enough people in my life to learn that our lives are fleeting, and yet there are a lot of pressures and expectations in our society that make certain things feel more important than they really are. Play as much as you can.

Surround yourself with people who can give you constructive criticism. And know that pursuing music is not a pipe dream, but takes just as much hard work as any other profession. Lastly, get out there and network.

You can find Sheldoncole’s music at https://sheldoncole.bandcamp.com/ or Sheldoncole.com. If you want to see Sheldon Cole live, they will be opening for Twin Bandit and Ohtis at The Heatley (696 E Hastings) on Jan. 30th at 7:30 pm.

ARTS & CULTURE

vengeance-fuelled prince, respectively.

A closer look on their motivations and a little further down their timelines, and something far more meaningful and relatable is discovered (Warning: spoilers!).

In old spaghetti western movies, character development was clearly laid out and communicated by the colour of the characters’ hats. The man in the white hat was consistently a good guy, and the man in the black hat would remain the antagonist. Sometimes, a character in a grey hat would show up, and he was just a little more interesting. If he was introduced as an ally to the hero, he would eventually defect to villainy, or realign his moral compass if he started out as a dangerous rival. It was obvious who we would always be cheering for, and who we would figuratively shake our fists at.

Needless to say, such rigid conventions are not necessarily present in current-day movies and television (although that’s another debate for another article). But the concept of a character who breaks the rule of first impressions continues to prove a powerful device. Consider two individuals from two very different television shows: Barney Stinson from the sitcom How I Met Your Mother, and Prince Zuko from the Nickelodeon series Avatar: The Last Airbender. By numerous accounts, these characters should be considered nothing more than a shallow player and a bitter, bratty,

Barney, by most standards, is not what you would call a “role model.” He is first introduced into the show as the sexist, manipulative, narcissistic womanizer who mainly serves as sad entertainment for the rest of the main characters.

At first glance, he is exactly the kind of person that one would point to in order to prove the decline in television comedy. But Barney is no stock character.

The character arc that he goes through over the course of nine seasons (if you’re wondering, season eight is the best), involving deep yearning for purpose, genuine joy, and increasingly tragic heartbreak, shapes him into a character whose success many root for more so than the show’s “main character,” Ted Mosby. There are some characters who can only be described as sad, lonely losers, without any tone of sympathy. In Barney’s case, you see the sadness and the loneliness, and you hope beyond everything that he might find a way out of it. This makes his character’s redemption at the end all the more powerful and meaningful.

Zuko experiences a far more drastic change. He begins the series stubbornly hunting down the main character in an effort to win paternal favour. This endeavour, which can be boiled down to a self-destructive search for human approval, nearly tears Zuko apart. Thanks to numerous incidents of failure, and a consistently wise and supportive uncle, the troubled prince undergoes a metamorphosis, shifting from an irrational, dissatisfied, disillusioned wanderer to an endearing, focused, self-secure ally to the forces of good. It’s Zuko’s dangerous presence at the beginning of the journey that makes his addition to “Team Avatar” even more exciting, as well as the fact that in doing so, we are able to see much of his true personality.

Beyond the anger and violence, Zuko reveals himself as a vulnerable, adorably awkward, but still considerably powerful agent of change.

Good characters are fine, and evil characters can be cool too, but it’s the transitions between the two that make me invested in a character. If anything, it shows that if they can change for the better, maybe I can too.

CONNOR THIESSEN

DREAMING OF MORE TIME: AND WHY YOU SHOULD MAKE TIME FOR A KIND OF ALASKA JOELLE WYMINGA Have you ever been in a situation where a single minute seems like hours? Or perhaps years pass in what feels like just a few days? Time is an element of life that has been explored and studied for a long time. Some people say that time is relative, or it is an illusion. What really is time?

As university students, time can mean so much. Whether it is that extra 15 minutes of sleep before you absolutely need to get up before class, or an extension of a few days on a paper—the time we have we cherish. Although time is a very abstract idea and isn’t tangible, it is one of our most precious possessions. Many would give anything to have more time. Unfortunately, the luxury of gaining more time is an indefinite impossibility as far as we know.

A Kind of Alaska by Harold Pinter, SAMC Theatre’s upcoming production, deals with the importance of time. In the play, Deborah wakes up from being in a coma for 29 years of her life, into the mind of a 16-year-old girl, but in the body of a 45-year-old woman. Deborah has suddenly lost 29 years of her life and has to deal with the trauma that comes

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from losing that much time in the blink of an eye. She is forced to learn about the life that she missed and face the reality that her youth has been stolen from her. She pieces together the memories of her childhood as well as the stories of present life that her older sister and doctor tell her, which may be nothing more than lies.

Although it is fiction, A Kind of Alaska finds its foundation in true events. Today there are still many cases of people losing much of their life because they are in a comatose state while others are sitting and watching time run away, oblivious to the value that it holds. Although not to the extreme of Deborah’s reality, many people know what it is like to have time slip away. It makes me wonder if instead of wasting my time by watching Netflix or snoozing my alarm, then dreaming for more of it, I should instead do everything I can with the time I am given.

A Kind of Alaska runs from January 31st - February 4th and tickets are available at the box office (twuboxoffice@gmail. com) as well as online with brown paper tickets.

“Your first kiss shouldn’t be with the boy you like because it is the grossest thing ever, so practice with other boys first.” — Kirsten VanGarderen

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ARTS & CULTURE

JOEL REDEKOP

Living in La La Land

A bumper-to-bumper traffic jam quickly evolves into a massive musical number. A long take captures it all: the breakdancing, the drum break that explodes out of a trailer, the deluge of participants that open up in song about the Los Angeles’ reputation as a city comprised of dreams. And then it ends as abruptly as it starts, with the scene’s cast quickly descending back into the cars that they so joyously had climbed up onto. Song and dance is nice, but it’s hot and there’s traffic and they have places they need to get to.

Damien Chazelle’s La La Land exists in two worlds: that of dreams and that of reality.

The love story that takes center stage, between jazz purist Sebastian and aspiring actress Mia, and walks the ambiguous line between these two worlds. Their relationship is grounded in the romanticism of Hollywood, with Sebastian wanting nothing more than to open a jazz club, while Mia longs for the role that will transform her into an icon. Idealists they are, chasing dreams that are not only enduring for them, but ones that have existed for as long as there has been a Hollywood.

In La La Land’s second and third acts, reality is certainly what takes hold. When Seb laments over L.A.’s citizens, saying that they “worship everything and value nothing,” we expect Seb and Mia to be exceptions to this rule. As idealistic as they are, their dreams aren’t empty, as their respective arts provide them with expression. We, as an audience, find ourselves hopelessly charmed as they dance around the Griffith Observatory, made famous by Rebel Without a Cause, as Mia and Seb are literally living out a cinematic fairy tale. However, there comes a point where the sun rises and reality must be faced. Just as our lovely couple is drawn out of their Hollywood fantasy, Chazelle draws us out of ours. One can live out their dreams, but Chazelle reminds us that dreams are only worth living if there is someone with which to share it. La La Land suggests that film is no different. It is, after all, nothing more than pictures, 24 of them per second. While the general public may be awestruck by these pictures alone (and the glamorous lifestyle that is attached to them), a film only finds meaning in the broader truth that inspires it.

However, as inspired as Chazelle is by Hollywood’s Golden Age, he is a revisionist.

Every time he sweeps the audience off their feet with a perfectly charming tap dance number or a stunning visual, he consistently subverts expectations, making sure that viewers don’t get too swept up off their feet.

For instance, when Mia first hears Seb play in a dimly lit restaurant, she tries to stop and compliment him, only to be shoved rudely to the side. La La Land might be a vibrant musical with an ensemble cast, but Chazelle is just as concerned with grounding his film in reality as he is with dazzling his captive audience.

Rebel Dreams “Rebellions are built on hope.”

This is the refrain throughout Rogue One: A Star Wars Story, a peculiarly optimistic phrase for what is, perhaps, the darkest entry in the Star Wars saga.

The first of the Disney spin-off films in the Star Wars franchise, Rogue One feels, in many ways, like a high-quality fan-film.

This isn’t a bad thing. As a side note to the projected trilogy that began with The Force Awakens last year, Rogue One can take risks that the other films cannot. No title scrawl, no John Williams, no Bothans, and certain digitally resurrected or rejuvenated actors, would almost certainly have been more negatively received in a primary Star Wars film. Rogue One effectively revives and remixes tropes and figures from the earlier films, while stepping out on its own to explore some truly new territory for the franchise.

The most striking of these explorations is the aforementioned darkness of the film, a darkness in the outcome of the plot which, though not unpredictable, proves to be emotionally weighty. There are no “character shields” in Rogue One, no “plot armour” or “script immunity.” No one is invulnerable. In the original trilogy, it would have been unthinkable for Luke Skywalker to be killed; similarly, with Anakin and Obi-Wan in the prequels, and Rey in the new trilogy. In Rogue One, however, our heroes are not so safe.

Rogue One is a primarily human story (“human” encompassing droids and all manner of aliens, in fitting Star Wars fashion), a story of heroism most significant in that the requisite Jedi heroics of the other Star Wars films are absent. Our heroes have neither lightsabers nor Force powers. They are morally compromised, many of them guilty of horrible crimes committed in the name of the causes which

“Starting a bread business on campus is a good idea.” — Bailey Broadbent

ERIC STEIN

they serve. They are people caught up in a struggle far larger than themselves, a situation demanding more than any one of them could be expected to give, which requires them to do so whether they want to or not.

Jyn Erso, the central figure of the film, does not choose to fight against the Empire but rather is thrust into the conflict, and must see it to its end. Everywhere in Rogue One there is such exception and necessity, and it is uniquely compelling for we viewers to recognize that, as our regular heroes wrestle with their extraordinary circumstances and are compelled to make impossible decisions they strive against overwhelming odds though the chances of a deus ex machina are slim.

So, when Saw Gerrera cries out, “Save the Rebellion! Save the dream!” we feel the gravity of what is at stake. The dream of the Rebellion does not come without cost: bodies—actual, material lives—are on the line, friendships and families, whole civilizations and planets. Where The Force Awakens was criticized for the flippant destruction of five planets and their entire populations, Rogue One brings those populations to the fore, the people whose living and being is threatened, and for whom our heroes give everything to preserve. Rogue One is not so concerned with new spaceships and new technologies, flashy set pieces and stunning action sequences (though all of such are present).

Before these, Rogue One is a story about people and our responsibility to one another, the demand of the other which is always already made upon us. Rogue One makes us think about the hard choices we face, about our moral criteria, about what we value in this world. I find such probing questions and the conversations they provoke to be worth far more than the ticket price.

15

’ let s

talk about secTs

This section is dedicated to a discussion of topics in Christian theology and ecclesiology from perspectives informed by a multiplicity of Christian “sects.”

Our topic for this issue:

S TAT E / C H U R C H R E L AT I O N S

C AT H O L I C LIESEL GIESBRECHT The Catholic approach to the church and state can be boiled down to the understanding that there are two basic realms of authority on Earth: the temporal (bound by time, earthly) and the spiritual.

The Church has spiritual authority, which has been granted to it by Christ himself when he made Peter the rock of the Church in Matthew 16. The Church speaks Truth to a fallen world, and proclaims the existence of moral absolutes.

The State has temporal authority, as Paul outlines in Romans 13. It wields the powers related to governance: “They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.”

Politics and religion are not distinct categories. Issues like poverty and euthanasia involve both political and religious matters because they are issues of morality.

When the Church and State interact, the State is bound by the moral norms that Catholics believe are set by Natural Law. Thus, the Church, as the proclaimer of these Truths, can speak to the morality of the State. The State, on the other hand, has a responsibility to its people and God to act morally. It cannot claim spiritual authority in and of itself.

The Church can and does speak to political matters throughout the world. In recent memory, Pope Francis spoke out regarding environmental stewardship. During the Cold War, Pope John Paul II issued strong condemnations of the Soviet Union. Throughout WWII, Catholic priests resisted Nazi policies regarding the Jews, and actively worked to preserve their lives. Catholics are called to prayerfully engage politically in their society; there’s no opt-out clause for members of the Church.

ANGLICAN LEANNE WITTEN In general, the Anglican Church operates separately from the state, but is structured around a system of leadership from within the church itself.

There are two branches of the Anglican Church in Canada.

The Anglican Network of Canada (ANiC) is under the Episcopal authority of Bishop Charles Masters under oversight of Archbishop Foley Beach of the Anglican Church in North America. The Anglican Church of Canada is part of the Anglican Communion, and therefore under the Archbishop of Canterbury.

Though Canada is technically under the authority of our Head of State, the British Monarchy, which is directly involved with the Church of England, church and state relations between churches in Canada are very different from those of the Anglican Church in England. To begin with, there is no official state church in Canada like there is in England:

In England, the Anglican Church is the official state church headed by the Archbishop of Canterbury. The Anglican Church in England also has a law-making role in Britain, unlike the Anglican church in Canada. 26 Bishops sit in the House of Lords in England and bring religious ethos to the secular process of law. In Canada, there are laws protecting religious freedom, but otherwise there exists a tradition of non-interference in religious affairs within the country.

Though the church and state are separate in Canada, leadership from within the church is nonetheless important in the Anglican Church. The churches have deacons, priests, and bishops who oversee church governance and ensure the teaching in the Anglican church remains rooted in its foundational doctrines.

ANABAPTIST RYAN DOMINGO

It’s not uncommon for Christians in multi-denominational settings to get into theological debates about infant versus adult baptism, but typically these discussions have little concept of the political dimension of this issue. In fact, baptism alone was not the historical reason for the 16th century Anabaptists (the original adult baptizers or “re-baptizers”) to split with the broader Protestant Reformation, but it serves as a visible sign of a deeper issue: the union or separation of church and state.

adults was not merely a matter of ensuring that the person understood the faith before committing to it. The Anabaptists were making the very political statement that the kingdom to which they belonged was God’s alone, and that the secular state did not have divine authority. They wanted the community of believers to govern itself, with Christ as its ultimate standard of lawfulness. That meant eschewing secular citizenship in favour of heavenly citizenship.

At that time in Europe, baptism did not just signify church membership and commitment to Christianity, but also citizenship. To be christened was to be initiated into society, which meant that symbolically, the church and state were identical, and so their powers were identical.

For the Anabaptists, this marriage of church and state was totally illegitimate: it subordinated the Kingdom of God to the laws of earthly kingdoms. The decision to baptize

Today, churches do not partner with the state to grant citizenship, but many Anabaptists continue to cast suspicion on the state. Ultimately, they believe that its power is worldly only, and if the Kingdom of God is to truly come into this world, it is through Christ-led communities that demonstrate the difference between earthly and heavenly kingdoms: a difference of peace, justice, and holiness.

Do you belong to a Christian minority and would like to contribute to this section? Contact us at marshill@gmail.com

“Ishould have never never sinned, so II wouldn’t wouldn’t know.” — — Joey Schweitzer Schweitzer have so know.”

Joey “You“I checksinned, out Roosters on Wednesday night!”

— Tyson Ediger

16

MADISON EVANS

makes me want to scream for answers.

Yet, we have a choice to learn to cultivate beauty, even in the darkest of places. We can live with intentionality: to learn, to serve, to create, to love. We can choose to embrace ambiguity, to work with what we’ve got, to expect the unexpected and push forward, to be steadfast in this chaotic paradox of life.

JARRETT FONTAINE I used to have this recurring vision of myself: I’m standing in a hazy, grey fog permeated by a white noise that swells to pierce my eardrums, then fades, only to swell again. I move very slowly, every movement, every breath requiring all of my energy. My body is very small, and more shadow than actual human form, hovering in space. This world in my mind is one marked by ambiguity, overwhelmed with the unknown. I cannot see where I am, where I have been, nor where I am going.

One day, from the pit of my stomach, a seed slowly sprouted and grew into a whirling mass of green vines. Roots stretched to the tips of my toes, and vines grew up my spine and into my head where they blossomed into lush flowers and kept growing out the top of my head, so far that I could not see where they went. Suddenly, there was light and warmth. Much of what I see is still hazy and grey, but there is a definite beauty that I did not see before—a garden I am learning to cultivate.

Such a place may only exist in my head, but as a wise woman once said through a fictional, deceased wizard, “Why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” It certainly feels real. Indeed, ambiguity is a very real part of life. It’s hard to live with, but live with it we must. It’s unsettling, agitating, and

There is beauty to be found in ambiguity. Some of the most affecting, timeless art is ambiguous, from Mozart’s symphonies to Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Wonderland, from Jackson Pollock’s abstract paintings to Cayetano Soto’s contemporary ballet. These works take effort to decipher. The fulfillment is in the processing—in stumbling across a flash of insight that teaches the viewer or listener some kernel of truth about life. This might not be what someone else sees in the work. Whether the work has accomplished what the artist intended to or not, perhaps that’s okay. Works of art are not riddles or equations to be solved, and neither is life.

Ballet in particular derives much of its beauty from ambiguity. From its Italian roots in the 15th century, ballet in France and Russia developed much of its style between the 17th and 20th century. During the Renaissance, dance was created to capture the drama of ancient Greek theatre and edify its audiences.

As choreography developed, ballet became increasingly political, philosophical, and humanistic, inspiring spectators to interpret the layers of truth that were conveyed. Although ballet had once been performed exclusively by men, during the 18th century it opened up to women, and ballet increasingly became characterized as a method of storytelling. During the Romantic era, the ballerina that personified sylph-like creatures became the centre of productions thanks to the development of the pointe shoe, which was reserved for female dancers.

Into the 20th century, French ballet had become stagnant, but was revitalized by the Ballets Russes company in Paris, sharing Russian ballet culture with the world, thus reminding us of how vibrantly poignant ballet could be.

While ballet is a classical, academic art form with its own linguistic and bodily vocabulary, it is often misinterpreted as stiff, calculated movements. Rather, it is poetry in motion, communicating grace and mystery through the body. It is an

expression of humanity, of what is personal and profound, what there are no words for. Mikhail Baryshnikov, world-renowned dancer and choreographer, describes even the classics—pieces which are sometimes seen as flat and archaic—as stories about “the great blessings and disasters that are the centers of our lives, the things one is usually too embarrassed or too frightened to talk about.”

Contemporary ballet, pioneered by George Balanchine, incorporates classical technique with a greater range of movement and fluidity. This shifts stage relationships, captivating the audience to observe what is happening between the dancers, letting their shared experiences and emotions on stage tell the story, rather than having the story already written, as in classical ballet. It is inherently ambiguous.

Cayetano Soto, Resident Choreographer at Ballet BC, is an innovator of some of the most unpredictable and penetrating contemporary works today.

In choreographing Ballet BC’s 30th season opening program, he explored mortality and death, causing the audience to confront the enigma of reality versus memory by moving his dancers from darkness to light and (sometimes) back into darkness.

Occasionally we turn to Scripture for answers only to ask more questions. I am learning to live with the tensions and uncertainties I find in those holiest of pages, for that is where I have found Jesus. That is where we discover a God great enough to touch us in our own ambiguity as we struggle to decipher what is real and good and true. This is where we find reconciliation and redemption, empathy and mercy, relationship and love. This is what the hard heart-work of life is for and what makes stepping out into the abyss where there is risk of being wrong, worthwhile. We need not focus on “right answers.” What we need to do is be steadfast in our pursuit of truth, and work together; to learn to tend the soil we find ourselves planted in. In the darkest of places there is light to be found.

There are no easy answers in life, but the answers imperative to growth and love are ours to learn. We may not be able to see where we’re going, but if darkness is ahead, then we must work hard to keep our gardens growing, planting seeds along the way, exploring the darkness, bringing the light of Life and Love with us.

“You’ll never regret skinny-dipping!” — Amy Reese

LINDSEY IMAN Let’s be honest, despite the sign’s attempt to include dos-and-don’ts for men in the gym, the dress code policy is not predominantly geared towards the male variety.

When I first read the new rules last spring I was sporting my favorite sentimental cut-off and, I’ll be honest, I was pretty infuriated. My mom doesn’t buy my clothes anymore and God knows I don’t have spare cash for new workout apparel! I continued to see girls in less attire than myself, so I continued on my merry way. Alas, here we are again, with administration in full force; solidifying society’s destructive blame on women for being too promiscuous so men can blame their objectification on anyone but themselves. Just a head’s up, gymboss: a woman could be dressed in a burlap sack and anyone whose heart ain’t right is still going to squirm.

I’m not arguing against the policy per se, but I do think this should prompt serious contemplation of what the dress code implies. Do we promote women to love their bodies? To not be ashamed of their curves, thin legs, or painfully average body? Requiring them to wear unflattering T-shirts fails to promote a positive outlook on the woman form. And if this is all about “keeping guys from being tempted,” are we really helping anyone by putting a Band-Aid on a gaping wound? Namely, tackling the heart of the issue rather than its symptoms might be more effective. Plus, have you heard half the music that is played in the gym?

That in itself is way sexier than seeing a little extra skin.

That being said, please don’t change the music.

SPORTS

17

THERE’S ALWAYS NEXT YEAR “There’s always next year.”

If you’re a sports fan like I am, you’re probably used to hearing that phrase a little too often. I can definitely say I hear it quite often around my house.

Being a hardcore Vancouver Canucks fan, I’ve had my fair share of tough days.

If you haven’t been following NHL hockey at all this year, the Canucks have been one of the most mediocre teams in recent memory. Just over halfway into the season, the team has won one game more than they’ve lost. They’re not good enough to rep a jersey around campus, but they’re not quite bad enough to throw in the towel and give up watching completely.

If you’re not a Canucks fan, I hope you haven’t quit reading—I won’t talk about mediocrity for too much longer, I just have to get my point across.

You see, if you asked me three months ago how I thought Canucks nation would perform this season, I definitely would have bit my lip and told you they were going to win it all this year. However, this hockey season is looking like the 47th in a row that the Canucks go without a championship. It’s pretty depressing when you mull it over, but that’s the nice way of saying they have never won anything. Your favorite sports team might be faring similarly this year, but at least you have a head start in looking forward to next season!

I, like most sports fans, usually put a little too much faith in my favourite team. Being optimistic is not a crime and dreaming big is not unheard of, but it does usually set one up for disappointment or failure. The best part about failure though, is that you can look forward to the next try. Sure, your favourite team might be extremely mediocre like mine, or just completely awful, but once they do hit rock bottom you can have some closure and look forward to the beginning of next season.

The beginning of a season signifies the turning over of a new leaf, and even if your championship aspirations are as slim as a sheet of paper, you still have every right to dream big. There’s always

room for optimism.

Now, here’s my message to all those lucky fans whose favourite teams are trending towards championship-ville this year. I have got a couple tips on proper etiquette. Be nice to the struggling fans out there, because you could just as easily be one of us. Be humble if your team has been able to find the success we all desire. And finally, cheer for the sport and not just your team. Because remember, as that famous movie once said, “We’re all in this together!”

BAILEY BROADBENT

ATHLETE SPOTLIGHT Mars’ Hill: How did you first get involved with basketball?

Vartan Tanielian: I moved from Lebanon to Los Angeles on the 9th of September 2001. Unfortunately, following the attacks on 9/11, I experi-

enced a lot of xenophobia and racism when it was discovered that I was from one of the “terrorist” countries. Students were most likely told by their parents not to associate with me, and I was isolated on the playground and I began to sense that my fellow class-

mates were afraid of me. Thankfully, not all my classmates were this cold. I made friends with other immigrant and African-American children who would introduce me to the game I love most: basketball. The rest is history.

MH: What made you want to continue your sport at university?

VT: Once I began playing basketball I dreamed of making the NBA. With this lofty dream, it was natural for me to want to pursue my sport at the post-secondary level. I still dream of playing professionally back in my home country, and if God opens that door for me following graduation, that is what I will be doing.

MH: What is the best part of basketball?

VT: The best part of basketball is playing on a team that is in total sync with one another. When you experience that sort of comradery it’s like you become one heart and one mind. It’s extremely hard to put into words what that feels like.

MH: What is the most challenging thing about basketball?

Vartan Tanielian Place of birth: Jbeil, Lebanon Year of schooling: 3rd year Major: Business Sport: Men’s Basketball

VT: The hardest thing about basketball is that is requires you to be good at so many different types of skills that range physically, mentally, and technically. This requires hours of practicing sport-specific skills like dribble combinations or thousands of shots in an empty gym, and general physi“Just jump on the count of 3!” — Peter Woekel

cal skills, which include sprinting and weight training. However, what makes basketball so truly challenging is the vast number of participants around the globe. This makes it extremely difficult to stand out and excel. It’s why basketball requires so many hours of practice.

As every player knows, there is always someone working while you are resting.

MH: What does your weekly basketball schedule look like?

VT: My schedule during season includes four two-hour team practices (from Monday to Thursday), two film sessions prior to practices, two weight training sessions, two individual workouts and two games a week. However, as I aspire to play professionally following university, I try to do additional practice before or after every team practice. During the off-season, my individual workouts increase to five to eight times per week and weights bump up to four times per week, along with scrimmages every Monday and Wednesday.

MH: How has your involvement with sports influenced your walk with God? VT: My involvement with basketball has gone hand in hand with my walk with God. It has brought me to a Christian university and high school and has put me in touch with great Christian men and women who have helped guide me in my faith. I don’t know where I would be in life without basketball and I thank God everyday for allowing me to play this sport.

18 CONNOR THIESSEN

HUMOUR

a worthwhile story CONNOR THIESSEN

As he did so, a strange article fell out of the greeting card. Chester picked it up, and turned it over.

Chester was an odd fellow. From his clumsiness, to his fascination with artisanal sauces, to his obsession over the works of J.R.R. Tolkien, Chester often found himself on the fringes of his social circles. That’s not to say that Chester’s friends didn’t like him, in fact he had proven himself a reliable and empathetic individual. It was simply that they had trouble finding activities that would include his interests with theirs. That is, until Chester’s 21st birthday.

Larry, who had until now remained silent, could no longer contain his excitement, and blurted out, “We’re taking you to New Zealand!”

Chester’s friends wanted to do something big for his birthday. Brian had suggested that they take him on a trip.

They had, at many times, heard Chester remark about his desire to visit the locations of the Lord of the Rings film trilogy. After agreeing that this would be a fun, thoughtful way to celebrate Chester’s birthday, his friends went about planning what would go down as one of the strangest, most disastrous birthday parties of the 21st century.

The day came for Chester’s friends to present the gift, and unwittingly set the chain of catastrophic events in motion. Chelsea, Chester’s girlfriend of two years, handed him a small gift bag.

“This is from all of us,” she said.

Chester eagerly pulled out the decorative tissue paper, lifted from out of the bag a small bottle. His face lit up with glee as he recognized the label.

“Gosh, guys! This is some of the most expensive Worcestershire sauce in the tristate area! Thank you so much!”

Brian piped up with a giddy smile.

“There’s more.”

Chester’s eyes widened as he proceeded to ruffle through the bag, pull out a small envelope handsomely signed with his name, and rip it open.

The expression on Chester’s face was one of unmistakable dread. He had been to New Zealand before, and he knew that returning to that wondrous country could only spell disaster. But his friends had paid for this trip. He could not simply refuse their generosity. They flew out the next morning.

To give them credit where it’s due, Chester’s friends had spared no expense. They had somehow arranged lodgings in the same iconic hobbit hole that housed Bilbo and Frodo in the motion picture adaptations. They’d scheduled an extensive tour of the finest sauce brewery in the local area, and the final night would be spent under the stars. In theory, everything was perfect. But that last night, Chester knew, would be their undoing.

“Help me move this couch outside, Chester!” Larry called, as the friends attempted to move much of the living room furniture out to the makeshift campsite.

“I’m not sure that’s a great idea,” Chester whimpered, traumatic memories of previous Middle-Earth-themed excursions flooding back. Everything was coming together exactly as he feared it would.

Larry, the blind fool that he was, simply replied, “Nah man, it’ll be super comfy when we’re all sitting around the campfire.” And the rest of the company carried on with the preparations, with Chester in the middle of it all, looking as terrified as Samwise Gamgee in the presence of a Ringwraith. It was as if

“Follow your heart” — Jemimah Fernando

the universe was actively working to recreate every awful incident he’d had the misfortune to experience in the land north of the Land Down Under.

As though in a dream, Chester found himself sitting on the couch in front of a roaring fire, dripping his new sample from the sauce brewery onto a roasted steak. Everything was so perfect, and yet at the same time, Chester knew that it would all go awry in just a matter of minutes. The suspense was excruciating.

Then it happened. Chelsea called from the other end of the couch, “Hey sweetie, pass me that stuff you got from the brewery.” This request was so innocent, so wholesome, that even Chester thought nothing of it. He carelessly tossed the catalytic projectile to the love of his life, and the events following were but a nightmarish blur.

Chelsea’s reflexes and hand-eye coordination failed her, and the bottle awkwardly bounced off her delicate hands, and spilt onto the cushion between them. They both got up and, before Chester could acquire any control of the situation, Chelsea had flung the cushion a little too close to the fire. The inferno spread shockingly quickly over the stain, and within a matter of minutes, the couch was engulfed in flames.

Everyone got up and tried to fan away the destruction, but to no avail. The damage had been done.

Chester stood stunned among the chaos. This was all too familiar, reminiscent of past vacations to Hobbiton which had somehow ended similarly.

But in the company of friends, everything seemed to have ended all the more severely. And that, dear reader, is the story of Chester’s worst Worcestershire-sauce-caused chesterfield field fire in the Shire.

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“To be modest with my achievements.” — Mariah Matthews

BATH ROOMS

MARS’ HILL REVIEWS: At Trinity Western University we acknowledge the diversity of students that tread our turf, but what we sometimes forget is the many varieties of bathrooms that are sprinkled across our campus. However, not all bathrooms are equal, and I wanted to know just how so, and to what extent. The following is a record of the spectrum of experiences to be had in the ladies’ and uni-sex lavatories at TWU. Although every bathroom is equally important, I have only the space here to focus on the hidden gems and really dirty Deborahs that we frequent daily.

KIRSTEN MCCALLISTER

The TWUSA bathroom: 6/10 The Lower Caf bathroom: 3/10 The Gym bathroom: 8/10 We will begin with the place that anyone who has had one too many TWUSA coffees will know intimately. The most spacious restroom we will visit is conveniently located at the centre of campus, this bathroom can double as change room, or the venue for a swift, silent dance party between classes. But like the rest, it has its flaws. If you happen to use the toilet on a day that it hasn’t flooded, you probably still should never ever touch the floor around the bowl, which is always glazed in a light sprinkling that has somehow escaped.

THE HIMNAL

This bathroom constitutes the greatest anomaly of my life’s bathroom experiences. There are three stalls to choose from and each will provide you with the experience of what it feels like to be at least 6’3”. If you are of Dutch descent, privacy only between the knees and the shoulders can be guaranteed. Fair warning: if you choose the far stall, mind the lock (though you will probably knock off its hinge anyway), and if you choose the middle, try not to look to the left or to the right so that you poke in on your shy neighbours. But limited privacy and mild embarrassment doesn’t have to be a downer; tell a joke about the tiny toilet you are using, and use this as an opportunity to meet new people!

Matthew Stinson

Hometown: Abbotsford, BC Denomination: Is Eastern Orthodox a denomination?

Favourite Christian non-worship song?

The Cucumber, Larry. Oh Where is My Hairbrush. Silly Songs with Larry. BigIdea, 1995.

CD.

“Which one?” you might ask, and there is no easy answer to this. While the lobby bathroom is your quickest option for a change room before you hit the gym, only do so if you are not environmentally concerned by ultra sensitive toilets that will compulsively flush every time you bend over to put on a sock. If this is troubling, you might want to try the locker room stalls. While they are quieter, they are also a bit of a tight squeeze.

The most forgotten option at the gym actually lies in the hallway between the two. Equipped with its five sinks, a baby changing station, and more stalls than you can count on one hand, this bathroom is designed for you and all of your friends, as well as a mother and her flock of young. Finding it and remembering that it is there is your only obstacle to this pristine and hidden gem.

year: I just want age: 0_0 to graduate

The Marlie Bathroom: 9/10 The diamond-studded crown of restrooms at TWU. Thrust into the furthest corner of campus, you will have to earn your luxurious relief, but this is really our magnum opus of washroom experiences. Its black granite counter top and framed pictures of Chinese calligraphy really give you the sense that this is something different, although it is ultimately its functionality that sets this lavatory apart. Between the fan, thermostat, and four rolls per stall, you can confidently and comfortably do what you came there to do.

In my journeys (which were by no means comprehensive) there was one thing that did surprise me about the TWU washroom experience. From Fraser Hall to Strombeck, not one stall had even a scrawl of the graffiti that normally provides light reading for its guest. This leaves me at a loss: if not in our school’s innermost chambers, where then are the existential crises happening at TWU?

Major: Psychology

Favourite Bible verse?

Proverbs 31:6 “Let beer be for those who are perishing, wine for those who are in anguish!”

Best pick-up line?

Look, you’re a fourth year, most Christians are engaged by now…just settle for me.

Top quality in a future mate?

Pity laughs “Just throw it in the wash. R.I.P. sweater, R.I.P.” — Jessie Van Rooyen

height: Tall

enough

Love Language?

English, but soft like my major How do you know it’s love?

Love is patient, etc etc…Next Question!

How many kids do you want?

Currently? A dog.