Mars' Hill Newspaper Volume 17 Issue 5

6 14 16 MARS’ HILL ACTS 17:19-20

VOLUME 17, ISSUE 5

NOVEMBER 21, 2012

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November 21, 2012

From the Editor

Scott Forsyth

PEOPLE YOU MAY KNOW Chris Montgomery, Visual Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

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Justin Poulsen, Managing Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

Scott Forsyth, Editor-in-Chief at Mars’ Hill Newspaper What do Tom Selleck, Super Mario, and Ron Burgundy have in common? They are all legendary men of mo’s. Movember: when young men embark on the single manliest journey of their life. But as any young man will tell you, it’s no easy journey.

Week 1: the most humiliating words a woman could ever say: “I thought you were doing Movember?”

Week 2: Being called a “Dirty Hipster,” “Pedo-Van Creeper,” and “Kip Dynamite.”

Week 3: Your girlfriend stops kissing you.

Week 4: Level-up to man. It is at this point that muscle mass increases by 50%, hair instantaneously sprouts from your chest and you can recite every Bruce Willis line from the Die Hard series…backwards.

I believe you learn a lot about life through growing a moustache: humility, honesty, courage, and perseverance. Jokes aside, Movember is a worthy cause designed to raise awareness and funds for prostate cancer. However, even as an unrelated act, I believe the growing of

Bethany Roy, Chief Copy Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper Laura Jensen, Photography Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper Justin Smith, Layout Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

and unique, Movember is a time where we can look past our differences and be united in a single act of (attempted) growth. In what other event do men across all countries, religions, and races come together and relate across the boundaries of our upper lips? The men of mo share a special bond—it’s the subtle nod when crossing paths with a stranger or the grin of another mo-man from across the room. And unlike most things in life, we aren’t doing this for the ladies; it’s actually quite the opposite.

Movember is purely FTB (for the boys). It’s a brotherhood, a calling—something that can only be explained through the tickle of follicles upon ones kisser. During this journey, most women think we are either ugly, stupid or attention hungry and want nothing to do with our ‘staches. They see it as participating in a pointless activity but then again, when don’t we?

Brooke Higginbotham Illustration Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

Christine Rmah, Web Presence at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

Alex Plenits, Advertising Manager at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

makes it out to be. It seems that my faith in humanity is slowly being restored through the mo. So to the female supporters of our lip sweaters: thank you. To the men: stay strong, you can do this. As Nick Offerman once said, “your mo will get fuller”. And to those women who have decisively chosen not to support us: just wait until you’ve got one of your own.

Dallas Fontaine, Finance Manager at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

Scott Forsyth, Editor-in-Chief at Mars’ Hill Newspaper Recently Mars’ Hill has come under attack, being repeatedly labeled as “egregious” and “biased” for its reporting of news surrounding the TWU union issue. While we admit that many of our staff have strong opinions on this issue, we have taken great pains to approach and present this topic as objectively as possible, logging dozens of hours in interviews with members from both sides of the debate. Indeed, we have received complaints from those for and against the union, regarding our “bias,” which can only prompt us to assume that in reality we seem to be giving quite an equal, and large voice to each party. Above all else, Mars’ Hill is committed discovering and presenting truthful dialogue; admittedly, the truth

MARS’ HILL

7600 Glover Rd. Langley, BC V2Y 1Y1, 604 513 2109 marshill@gmail.com, www.marshillonline.com, @marshillonline MARS’ HILL

Mars’ Hill is a student publication of Trinity Western Univer-

SENIOR EDITORS Editor-in-Chief

Justin Poulsen

the occasional correction, we would like to thank you for partnering with us in this dialogue.

The last thing we want is a shouting match.

Mars’ Hill seeks to be a professional and relevant student -

Managing Editor Visual Editor

SECTION EDITORS

Chris Montgomery, Visual Editor at Mars’ Hill Newspaper

local, national and international

Larissa Kroeker

MISSION TO MARS

Academy

First print, then Morse-code, then phone calls—social media is now the new paradigm for interpersonal and mass communication. We chose to focus on the eight most recgoniz-

News

Arts & Culture

through your internet tabs. As for the cover? Set on a background of the colour often used to symbolize transformation, let’s approach this phenomenon with reverence for He who gave us life in under 140 characters: with just one breath.

of Trinity Western University, Sports Humour

for

purposeful,

constructive -

PRODUCTION STAFF Laura Jensen Photo Editor

Illustration Editor

EDITORIAL POLICY

by Cam Stuerle

Layout Editor

-

Chief Copy Editor

OPERATIONS Dallas Fontaine Finance Manager

Advertising Manager Web Presence

CONTRIBUTORS Travis Heide Opinions Mars’ Hill

expressed

in -

editorial board, Trinity Western

Bryce Perry

ADVISOR

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Pour Some Sugar On Me by Def Leppard” -Colin Weeres

November November 21, 21, 2012 2012

Search for people...

Larissa Kroeker

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Larissa Kroeker | Home |

Laura Jensen

News Bites US Presidential Election On November 6th, Barack Obama defeated Mitt Romney in the 57th United States Presidential Election, to continue serving a second term.

The Democratic Party guaranteed their stay in power with 50.7% of votes, while the Republican Party only received 47.7% of votes.

FAVOURITES News Feed Messages Events Photos NEWS ARTICLES Why a union?

7 people like this. Comment Share 13 minutes

Ft. Langley building Sto:lo ground Food for thought

Alex Plenits Smithing at California College of the Arts. Using her passion for jewelry and the skills she has acquired down south and here at TWU, Natalie has just made the entrepreneurial leap in starting her own custom jewelry business called Antturi Jewelry.

12 minutes ago Like

Renewed Vision

Alex Plenits Why did you choose to work with jewelry?

by Sarah Gregory

11 minutes ago Like

When Jodi Bagge, the head of ministry group that we renovate the prayer room in the Douglas buildprayer room in Douglas?

The prayer room is tucked away in the same wing as The Pillar and tively secluded—perfect for its intended purpose. It provides a place for students to escape the hectic schedule and all the craziness of university life and meet with God in whatever way suits them best, undisturbed by the distractions of the outside world. However, as soon as time, we saw its need for redecorating.

Natalie Anturri perfect outlet to pursue this passion. I like how interactive jewelry is, as sonal.

10 minutes ago Like

Hostess Declares Bankruptcy The company famous for Twinkies and Wonder Bread has declared bankruptcy on November 16th.

After 82 years of business, Hostess Brands Inc. is liquidating due

on Twinkies anytime soon, as many companies are interested in buying the brand.

Legalizing Marijuana This past month, Colorado and Washington have legalized the tax and regulation of marijuana for adults over 21 years of age. Au-

Alex Plenits How would you describe your jewelry crafting style?

the legal limit should be, since

9 minutes ago Like Natalie Anturri My style could be described as simple and elegant.

drugged driving. This is fueling the hotly debated topic of legalizing pot across the border in British Columbia.

I like to work a lot with fairly neutral colours, and aim for a classic style which will withstand passing trends.

BBC In Hot Seat

8 minutes ago Like Alex Plenits What do you think you bring new to the market?

What is your competitive edge?

7 minutes ago Like Natalie Anturri jewelry, which is usually cheaper and lower quality, and more expensive jewelry that might be reserved for special occasions. Because all my work is handmade too I hope it offers a more personal feel.

The British Broadcasting Corporanight” program has been caught televising untruthful news. An episode of the news program accused Lord McAlpine, a British politician of the 1980s, of being a child abuser.

This allegation–along with recent news reports–turned out to be false. Two executive directors have stepped down pending a review of

6 minutes ago Like

art group, we decided to give this room the time and attention it deserves. Over the last couple of weeks, we have made some exciting changes. The walls are no longer a sterile white, but a warm, almond colour, and the decor is being

Alex Plenits Have you taken any risks to start your business?

Hurricane Sandy

5 minutes ago Like

From October 29th to 31st, a category 2 hurricane ravaged 24 states on the Eastern U.S. coastline. Hurricane Sandy left behind massive

Natalie Anturri was just investing in the materials and tools. Since I only work with freshwater pearls and sterling silver, it cost a bit to build up my stock materials.

4 minutes ago 3 people like this. has been covered in chalkboard paint to give anyone the opportunity to leave their thoughts, prayers, art, and writing up on the walls as encouragement for everyone who uses the space.

Our hope is that, with the new renovations, this room will be a welcoming and comfortable place for people to come and meet with God—that more and more students will appreciate the importance of having a sacred place of meeting on our campus.

and damages totalling an estimated $50 billion. Many telethons and charities have contributed in the hurricane relief effort.

Alex Plenits Any advice for students wanting to start a business?

3 minutes ago Like Natalie Anturri have to be self-doubt. It was kind of scary buying all of the materials and everything needed to launch this business, and to just go for it. I

Black Market Ivory Seized

2 minutes ago Like Mars’ Hill www.facebook.com/AntturiJewelry www.etsy.com/shop/AntturiJewelry

cated over $1.4 million dollars worth of ivory last Thursday. An African shipping container was discovered to have 1,209 ivory tusks and 3 pounds of ivory ornaments hidden Hong Kong government has vowed

1 minute ago 7 people like this.

members.

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? ”The Indiana Jones Theme Song” -Raquel Anonby

4

November 21, 2012

Recently the Christian Labour Association of Canada (CLAC) sent a letter to faculty stating, “The list [of faculty] was found to contain numerous errors, and therefore, the Vice-Chair could not determine whether we had in fact met threshold.”

It added, “Following a four day investigation, the SIO concluded that there were 276 faculty currently teaching at TWU—a count that included TWU Extension, Student Life staff, and athletic coaches. Department Chairs are included in this count; however, administration has indicated that they do not believe that this

NEWS.

group belongs in the prospective bargaining unit.”

According to CLAC, the Board has not ruled on this matter, “as there are still questions regarding the appropriateness of the bargaining unit description…the SIO’s report does not serve as a ruling, but rather, a source of information for the Board to utilize in the upcoming hearing.”

Administration has responded to this letter, saying that certain facts were not fully accurate.

Provost Bob Wood stated, “The University had provided the LRB with a list of 346 active employees. How-

On October 3rd, Mars’ Hill CHRIS MONTGOMERY broke the news that certain discontents among faculty led to an initiative to bring in the Christian Labour Association of Canada (CLAC) as a mediator between the Trinity Western University administration and its faculty. On November 1st, TWUSA hosted an information meeting for students to hear from both faculty and administration on the issues, concerns, and details of the unionization process.

Last week, Editors Chris Montgomery and Cameron Reed met with several faculty and administrators to answer the question that many are still left asking: “What are the actual issues that faculty have with the governance of the University that prompted them to pursue a union?” So as not to add more names and faces to this debate, we have chosen not to run the names of the professors interviewed.

For a full version of this article, including responses from the Administration, go to http://www.marshillonline.com/news/ union-and-unity/.

NOT ABOUT THE MONEY A misconception many have is that faculty are attempting to increase their

salaries. Each faculty member we interviewed who is in favor of unionization emphasized that salary is not the primary issue behind the unionization drive. “We come to this university not for pay, but because we like what it stands for,” is the shared perspective.

While some of the faculty’s requests may require an increase in depart-

The historic Fort Langley market is back, TRAVIS thanks to the HEIDE efforts of owner Robert Lee and family, who share ties with the community drawing back nearly 40 years. The market, reimagined and renamed “Lee’s Market-Fort Langley” is a testament to overcoming crisis in Fort Langley.

The loss of the IGA was traumatic, not just for Lee but for the entire community. Seniors are excited for the new market, since many lack the energy or means to venture into the municipality for their groceries. Naturally, Trinity Western University students fell into this orbit as well; the outlet

ers for friends/girlfriends—all just a refreshing walk away. Even after an absence of nearly two years, it is hard to imagine the site without this building; IGA was more than a store, it was dependability and memories.

With regards to the town of Fort Langley, Lee has the highest respects.

“I think it’s the best place in B.C. because the people make the big difference in the town. We don’t call them customers; we call them neighbours and friends.”

Indeed, the town is a heritage-designated area; the staff said reverently, “We are not forgetting about the old store.” Lee remarked that when he showed the design for review by the board, a rarity occurred: the blueprint

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salary was not mentioned.

PRIORITIES OF TEACHING One issue that many pro-union faculty members did cite was frustration with the numerous mandated responsibilities of their professorship.

The professors we spoke with certainly love to teach. However, faculty are required to balance several additional responsibilities—research, committee attendance, public lecturing, journal publishing—along with lecturing in class each day. Faculty who cite this concern feel they are “working out of the corner of [their] desk” as they attempt to balance all of these jobs.

While some would like to dedicate even more time for research, others would like to focus more on teaching.

The former are asking for additional relief from their course load in order to remain relevant in their highly hind by other universities.

The latter are asking for less em-

(SIO) concluded there are only 276 faculty currently teaching. The way the Union presents this gives the impression that 70 names were on the list that should not have been. The University was very open and clear that the original list (of 346) included part-time faculty who historically have taught in Spring and Summer but are not teaching this Fall.”

Wood further explained that the LRB did not decide this issue; rather, the SIO conducted this investigation to determine which of the two numbers was the faculty’s “best case sce-

phasis on research requirements so they can focus on their teaching without the added stress of needing to be published. Overall, both groups would like their work environment to better accommodate their particular academic priorities.

”

We come to this university not for pay, but because we like what it stand for.

”

nario” for reaching the necessary 45% threshold.

The 276 number was determined by the SIO to be the best case scenario for the Union. Whether spring and summer faculty should be included is a legal issue that would need to be argued at a subsequent hearing if the Union was able to reach the threshold on this best case scenario number.

He also dispelled the rumour that the Vice Chair ordered an investigation because the list contained errors.

According to Wood, the Vice Chair found that he could not determine if the Union had met the 45% threshold

concerns. While the Senate now addresses concerns about academics, the Faculty Association continues to addresses concerns about administration. “Academics” refers to everything related to the professors’ relationship with both their students and their area of study. “Administration” refers to the nitty-gritty details of employment contracts and HR concerns.

While both the FA and Senate provide more specialized avenues for communication and problem solving, there remains uncertainty among faculty as to what those roles look like in praxis. Some are worried that the FA

COMMUNICATION CHANNELS Another main concern of faculty has been confusion over the grievance process—how professors’ needs and issues are dealt with on a situational basis. Until a few years ago, the primary route of faculty grievances was directed through the Faculty Association (FA). Faculty presented concerns to this body of peers and the chair of the FA would meet with the administration in the Faculty Affairs Committee (FAC) where these concerns were presented.

This process changed in 2010 with the introduction of the Senate: a new faculty-led body designed

only suggest concerns and does not really hold any authority, many have come to see it as a waste of time, having voiced concerns in the past but still wait for them to be dealt with in a serious and timely manner.

TENURE STATUS Multiple sources on both sides of the issue have indicated that there have been occasions in the recent past where tenured professors have been ‘let go’ with little explanation to the rest of the faculty. While the University would like to provide as much information as possible on this issue, it is still legally obligated to keep the vate.

was immediately approved. Don Edmund, a Fort Langley native who is a consultant on interior décor shared that the inside painting will retain a “distinctive look.”

Despite adjustments, Village Coffee alongside most of the entire town is happy about the market’s return.

Kim Jacobs remarked how the project brings in much service, regularly seeing the owner himself in her cafe for coffee with bylaw people and construction workers. She really appreciates the buzz and business from them. “It is good for community; we’re all happy.”

Looking forward, Robert Lee’s driving idea is to be “more than just a grocery store”—to develop a con-

lage. His assistant Andy Abreo said that when they started to rebuild they wanted to go independent. Choosing independence from IGA opens up new possibilities to deliver organic foods and natural products by local farmers. Lee called this step a return to the farmers’ market way of closing the gap between producers and consumers, concluding, “It’s really nothing new.” Of course, the new sourcing endorses local farms while supportdence builder.”

For information, photos, and opening dates, contact Robert Lee or Andy Abreo at www.facebook.com/leesmarketfortlangley

that would allow a vote to be ordered.

He adopted the process the parties had discussed, and agreed to allow that determination to be made after the investigation. If the threshold has been met, a vote will be permitted to take place outside the normal 10 day limit, once actual the numbers of the In an email to the university, Dr. Raymond stated that the LRB will be holding a hearing on Friday, November 23 to clarify these issues further.

Similarly, some faculty raised concerns regarding the current university policy of reviewing employment contracts on an annual basis. It was phrased by one faculty member that this means they are required to “essentially prove to the university on a yearly basis, why they should still be employed.”

Regardless of the outcome of this unionization movement, conversations will likely continue to take place, and will likely be challenging for both sides. The administration is bound by law to be above reproach, unable to offer any “coercive” solutions that would bribe the faculty away from their feeling of needing a union. On the other side, the faculty are limited from sharing too much information for strategic reasons, to successfully present their opinion effectly.

Alumni Association President and TWU Honourary Doctorate recipient Bob Kuhn offered Mars’ Hill his perspective. As a lawyer involved with the landmark Supreme Court case involving the BC Teacher’s Association a decade ago, he has seen the university this new challenge, Kuhn exhorts that now more than ever, “this is an opportunity to show the power of Christ to the world.”

“It’s great; we need it.”

“It’s been missed; it doesn’t feel the same here without it.”

“The Lee family? Never heard a bad thing about them.”

“It will be grander than it was before.”

“It’s something you’d see in Vancouver, not Fort Langley.”

“We want our ‘neighbours’ back.”

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Freaks & Geeks by Childish Gambino” -Justin Poulsen

November 21, 2012

NEWS.

5

Sto:lo ground A peek at the Westcoast Collegium Aboriginal dedication.

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CHERI BROWN

Patti Victor really knows how to throw a party. On the evening -

dedicate the space as the campus’ gathering place for native dialogue.

Attendees arrived to the sound of drums beating and a hum of excitement in the room. nized and hosted the event. On the agenda were opening words from

and prayer by Kwantlen and Sto:lo leaders.

The normally soft-spoken Victor had some passionate words to say about her Siya:m role: “It is my joy to meet with aboriginal students each week to talk to them about every-

ALANNA PETERS

Eastbound Sailing

and to provide encouragement and talk about the call of God upon their

nities for 40 years.

Brown expresses his gratitude to TWU. “Events like tonight contrib-

is a vision that God has given me and God has a big plan. It’s bigger than me or anyone’s visions because our God is a big God and an awesome God! We need Aboriginal people

and partnering. Awareness and love between aboriginal and non-aboriginal communities is beginning and social development is taking place.”

The unveiling of Aboriginal art-

Holy Spirit to enable them to do what God wants them to do.”

After great cheers from the crowd

commissioned and custom designed by local aboriginal artists.

Victor was presented with a gift of a woven Salish shawl depicting three rows of red diamonds to represent blood of Jesus.

Haida Gwaii shared his moving story.

After surviving the residential school system in Alert Bay and drinking Jesus as the result of a spiritual experience at age 22. His lifestyle changed and pastoring to aboriginal commu-

Victor’s beaming face above her new shawl tells the story of the great success of the evening.

Conversations have started on comgap between communities in the new gathering place.

An interview with a recently published alumni.

Todd Foley (FA 08) has recently pubCHRISTIE lished a novel ESAU entitled Eastbound Sailing. Here’s what he had to say about how he ended up being an indie author.

MARS’ HILL: What made you

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did you get started?

TODD FOLEY: I’ve always loved writing. I got a full-time communications job right after graduat-

an itch to do something on the side - constantly bouncing back and

forth between ideas. I read through Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott and decided I was going to start writing much work was ahead of me.

MH: What was the hardest part of the writing and/or publishing process?

TF: The biggest struggle was getting to know the characters and getting inside their heads. How do they talk? What sort of vocabulary do they use? How do they respond to circumstances? What worldview do they possess? What happened in their past? This held up the writing process for a while as I studied people around me as well as char-

explore publishing options and was overwhelmed by how much I didn’t connections via Twitter with established indie authors thousands of miles away. I can’t count the number of emails I exchanged with another author about the best production processes and the technicalities of operating a one-man publishing company.

MH: What surprised you the most in the process of writing a novel?

TF: had to let the story lead me. I spent the majority of my lunch breaks at a

$ ?

WHAT THE HILL

One woman in Arlington, Texas thought she had a deal that was too good to be true. When a man approached her at a gas station asking if she would like to buy an iPad for $200, she immediately jumped at it. The man sped off and when the lady got home she realized her iPad box contained nothing more than a mirror. Apparently one doesn’t need to break a mirror in order to have bad luck. Hopefully now she will have a chance to reflect on her mistake.

and getting to know the characters.

Sometimes I’d walk away with a dozen ideas; other times it wouldn’t go anywhere. I literally was living in much more real to me - sort of a conglomeration of themes and lessons I both experienced and witnessed.

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and we all need hope.”

Check out his website at scribbledrevisions.com. Eastbound Sailing is currently available for order on Amazon.

We all know American politics can get heated at times, but one Arizona woman took this to a whole new level last week. In an argument with her husband, she determined that he was directly responsible for President Obama’s re-election, because he didn’t vote. She attempted to retaliate for this aggregious crime by running him over with her SUV. Luckily he was not split into bi-partisans.

AUDREY MARTIN

BREAKING NEWS: Pregnancy tests are useful for both genders! After a man joked on the popular social news site Reddit about receiving a ‘positive’ when peeing on a pregnancy test, he was informed that it might actual mean something. As it turned out, he had testicular cancer and Redditors may have saved his life. Cancer isn’t funny.

Food for thought

A student discusses an increase in eating disorder-related illnesses.

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MEGAN BEYER

“You have an eating disorder.”

I heard this

time four years ago when I got admitted to the Alberta Children’s Hospital in the fall of 2008. Hearing the words “eating disorder” sent a wave of unknown emotions through my frail body. I remember laying in my hospi-

be one of the hardest things I would order.

Symptoms of eating disorders can include repeatedly refusing to

to be completely absorbed in one’s own thoughts. Other symptoms may include an obsession over calories

ing to accept the horrifying fact that I I made towards my recovery. At that moment I knew that this was going to

sticking to strike schedules.

Eating disorders are especially common for both men and women

during university years because of the heightened level of stress and anxiety.

Just because we attend a Christian university doesn’t mean we are protected; they are just as common here at Trinity Western University as they are at any other campus. Eating disorders are commonly mistaken as a 15% of people affected by this menmale eating disorder hospital admissions has increased by 66% over the last 10 years.

My eating disorder gave me control over my stressful life. Other people have gone through traumatic

experiences that give way to their eatbody image issues that are strongly in-

have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness.

It has taken me two stays in the appointments to get me to the strong state I am now in. Even though these past years have been extremely difthis dark time of my life. Because of

drawn to helping others that may be ticipating in fundraisers and spreadvating me to study psychology here at Trinity Western University. God has a lovely way of bringing so much good out of the bad. feat…and eat!

You can contact Megan at mbeyer@ telus.net or the Wellness Centre at sandy. schellenberg@twu.ca

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Let’s Get it On by Marvin Gaye” -Jason Keegstra

6

November 21, 2012 CAMERON REED cameron.reed@mytwu.ca

The Agora of Ideas The social heartbeat of the ancient world continues to pump dialogue.

There was a slight smile on Devon Bryson’s lips as the room burst into protest. He had dropped a philosophical bombshell and turned a discussion on aesthetics into a scene straight out of 12 Monkeys the comparison absurd and roll his eyes into the back of his head until they popped.)

Words were impossible to discern.

There was a lot of neighing and braying, and I’m pretty sure somebody was curled into the fetal position in the corner as the skies contracted and knowledge crowned. Gross.

Okay, I admit that was me in the corner.

“Ah yes,” Devon spoke quietly, “the birthing pains.”

No, Devon Bryson is not Socrates, but he might as well be. That night in Missouri, Devon Bryson brought us all into the agora of Ancient Greece.

The Ancient Agora of Athens was

a crucial place for the exchange of ideas. It was the social heartbeat of the ancient world. There the politicians battled in debate; there the merchants marketed their goods; there the masses exchanged gossip and kept the ancient world going around.

For Athenians, the agora was Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Pinterest, all squished into one. It was TV, arena, and shopping mall. Sometimes it was awful and there was nothing except Aristotle on, and God knows that man was a brilliant bore!

Today, it lies in ruins, a mere reminder of the platform it once held, the feet it supported, the arguments it heard.

But the agora still lives. As the agora was the Ancient Greek’s social media, social media is our agora.

There is power in social media that can change the world. Politicians and advertisers have discovered a phe-

nomenon that philosophers have yet to: social media shapes the global subconscious. We are exposed to a barrage of ideas, and ideas shape the world. Currently, the majority of those ideas barely qualify as entertainment, but what if our brightest minds were to shape them into dialogue? A Ph.D. student of history at the University of Florida, Brian Hamm says, “It will be education in the fullest sense of the word that will provide the leaven to enrich the discourse shared by the global community across the various social media sites.”

The ability to connect with friends and family across the globe is an incredible boon social media boasts.

However, its ability to become an ‘ideagora’ and the potential we have to engage with the world is just too great to ignore.

Devon Bryson, that sly dog, a Ph.D. student in philosophy at the

University of Tennessee, sees the challenge. “Social media seems to have a tendency to quickly devolve in complexity and clarity, not to grow in it as conversations progress … If social media were to become a successful philosophical forum, it seems to me

Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest. Like Alexendar the Great’s seven generals scrambling for his empire, a new world-power entered our lives: You weren’t really dating until Facebook said you were. You could know everything about your ex-boyfriend’s

She proceeded to show me how the application involved taking pictures of oneself and sending it to someone. They would receive the picture and be able to look at it for three seconds before the picture would disappear and you would not see the picture again.

She then continued to tell me that it was sometimes the only way to keep in touch with people. In fact, the only way that she communicated with one of our friends on the east coast was through this application.

No words had actually been typed, spoken, or texted between them, only random obnoxious pictures of each other.

We’ve come a long way in social media, to say the least. But who

to combat (and indeed reverse) this phenomenon.”

I am not naive enough to ignore that social media is a black hole of self-absorption, that it wastes far too much of our time, and that it imbues us with self-importance. But social media is only a tool. In itself, it is neither good, nor bad. However, it can be used well or poorly and it is here to stay. So let’s roll up our sleeves because we have work to do.

The time is now. The channel is open. The agora is there. Bring on the birthing pains.

-Tom Gage @thgage

In the beginning...

And the internet was void, and without form.

In the beginning, someone created a chat room to connect people with similar ideas and hobbies. But this was not enough. The Internet was dark and empty. So more connections were created.

And so it began. With a simple desire to bring people, employees, and bored housewives closer together, social media was born into our world. Unknowingly, it was the beginning of the end.

I was in middle school when MySpace took over the world. Spare time moved into another realm. I would wait for the internet to dial up just to sit on the computer and talk to my friends about what had hapto get from school to home. But it was cool. And you could use smiley faces. And talk to boys without being embarrassed. And show people how

could have walked around with my pants on backwards, but if I had Green Day on my page, I was golden.

Riding the MySpace wave, cell phones were next to roll up on shore. Once we got out of the rough

”

I could have walked around with my pants on backwards, but if I had Green Day on my page, I was golden.

phase of Nokia bricks the size of phones. Texting was like a virus. In a dark time, I sent more than 5,000 text messages in a month, something made very clear I was not to do again by my father (the one who pays the bills).

And soon after, Skype, Facebook,

”

brother’s girlfriend’s family vacation to the Cayman Islands.

Literally every second of every day

of socializing. I was talking with a friend of mine the other day and she was showing me her new favorite hobby on her phone. Somehow we

says it all, right?

-Colleen Little

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Bring Da Ruckus by Wu Tang Clan” -Kirk Anderson

November 21, 2012

ACADEMY.

To drink or not to drink

7

The highs and lows of caffeine addiction.

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CAMERON REED

However it comes—from just plain black coffee, the

aches, anxiousness, lack of motivaThen for some strange reason,

mug of Earl Grey, or from the extreme,

stopping consumption after it has But few are aware that habitual caffeine consumption can have a less -

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But before you up your intake, I how to maintain a healthier rhythm -

any pleasurable, habit-forming substance, like alcohol or cigarettes, we

The symptoms usually occur -

The severity of these effects ligrams, the amount in one small cup

NaNoWriMo

LAURA JENSEN

50,000 words, 30 days, 1 student.

The night is

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HANNAH WASWA

There are only a few more hours before

National Novel Writing Month—

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The goal is to write an entire novel,

Like a marathon, the true motivation is the satisfaction of having

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begin rewriting the novel you never

Trinity Western University stuWelcome to National Novel Writ-

DISPATCHES FROM THE LLC Ten weeks ago

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TIM ANDRIES

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a very unique

in various capacities for many years,

been unable to satisfy it since the ser-

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the halls of power, or in a trailer on -

on Gatineau, across the Ottawa River, -

theology at that Bible school you went

the wake of that conversation I real-

my particular posting began to wear be more interesting, more exciting, More important than the insight into how government works, my

The lofty illusions I brought with

into the internship I was resigning to the possibility that the rest of my

knows well the college in my home-

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Simply the Best by Tina Turner” -Dave Dueck

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November 21, 2012

ACADEMY.

Prof etics -

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CHERI BROWN

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KATHLEEN DUNN

As young university students, my upon

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being

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For more information on the research

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LAURA JENSEN

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Doe Boy Fresh by Three 6 Mafia” -Kaitie Simonson

November 21, 2012

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Tim Andries A collection from one of TWU’s favourite Instagrammers

www.almosteric.com

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “YEEEEAAAAH! from CSI Miami” -Justin Smith

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November 21, 2012

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Asteroid Galaxy Tour by Golden Age” -Jordan Magnuson

SO CIAL ME DIA

November 21, 2012

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CHRIS MONTGOMERY My relationship status: it’s complicated. Not with my girlfriend—with my phone. For every wonderful and life-changing app that I download and pretend I use, there’s one that just annoys me to no end: the phone app.

Every time it lights up, my heart goes down. Not because I hate who’s on the other end (usually) but because it requires so much effort; Am I laughing enough at their joke? Do I sound cheerful? Did I just interrupt them or so much easier if I could just read their text from the comfort of my own solitude. When you need to talk to someone you don’t actually talk to them: you text them, you message them, you tweet them, even email them before making a call.

The word “communicate” is derived from the Latin “communicare,” meaning to impart, share or make common. But when I hear that word I automatically think of “commune.” And when I think of commune, all I can think of is a bunch of nuns silently eating bland beans in a stuffy, stone church. Not a whole lot of communication happening there. But is our modern “commune-ication” much different? Most of our interactions occur in the solitude of our own rooms. Echoes of once rich and lively conversations have been reduced to the Morse-code of clacking keyboards and buzzing ringtones.

We lie upon the cusp realizing the great falsity of our generation: more, and easier, ways of communicating propagates more, and better, communication. The reality is that social media is far from social; we are walk-

ing oxymorons believing that clicking “like” on a post is equivalent to haps even more disconcerting, is how from those “likes.”

Don’t get me wrong, our contemporary communication still serves haps now more than ever we have the ability to exchange information in an accurate and timely manner. Even each ‘lol’ and ‘omg’ can be selected with care to invoke an exact emotion from the receiver.

Consider your online communication style for a moment. Don’t worry, it won’t take much longer than it takes to type a tweet. Let’s imagine ite—yes, you are the sculptor. Every post, every added friend, every status update is a chisel chip into your sculpture. No matter how much you intend these interactions to be personal, your corner of a coffee shop—it’s in a piece in a gallery, for all to see. You show the world exactly what you want, and hide everything you don’t.

Every action we take online is an intentional strike into the creation of our David. The problem is that we now expect our real life to be an extension of this perfect personal production. But our life doesn’t have a delete key, nor does it allow for editing. of these ugly things that our identity is born; those experiences form our

brings also comes with its own insecurities. You might say that with this emerging social norm, we’ve now begun to harbour an unconscious fear of being “unfriended” in real life, which has fundamentally altered faceto-face communication. When we enter a social setting, an implicit pressure to perform—to earn the attention of our friends—weighs upon us. It’s much easier to be witty in a comment bar, than the bar down the street. We may act like our electronic twin is our identical, but deep down we know we can’t have both the David and a heartbeat within it.

I am not writing this from a disillusioned higher ground. I am the guiltiest of the techno-whores. I strongly believe that the channels o er in the best forum that the 21st century can provide. There must be room for growth, room for error, room for those oh-so-awkward moments.

It is good that we desire our lives to be works of art; but our identities are meant to be formed without the pressures of an audience expecting perfection. Of course we should continue to present beautiful moments of our beautiful moments of sincerity. Take the time to admire the sunset with your eye before your lens. Don’t be afraid to chime into the conversation, even without the safety net of the preceding Enter key. You may not always be proud of your piece in the gallery of life, but be at peace that its impact reaches further than your WiFi signal.

have tricked ourselves into thinking we are too.

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “The Riders of Rohan” -Ben Bloch

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November 21, 2012 Emma

The Trinitorialist Winter approaches, everyone walks with a red Starbucks cup in hand, and… the sidewalks are bustling with trendsetters left, right and center?

Yes, they sure are! Just by taking a little stroll around camof cozy winter coats with colboots (both short and tall) that are to die for, and fabulous incorporations of splashes of red, green or blue, and details of gold. Each and every student has their own way of pulling off these garments, showing how truly individualistic and diverse this campus is. This is just some of the treasure that we found.

Blazer + Converse 10 repins

Laura Jensen

Photo by Jef Gibbons

Picture This!

Simple apartment decor

Classic coat

2 repins

7 repins

Laura Jensen

Laura Jensen

5 repins

Megan Beyer

7 Though staunchly atheistic, it ironically includes some of the best Christian themes I’ve seen in modern cinema, including, “Our life is not our own.”

However, the entire movie is crippled by one glaring falla-

Cool accent fabric for your dorm!

3 repins

Laura Jensen

5 repins

Laura Jensen

A guy with a tie.

stating that all truth is objective: any subjective interpretation is a lie. The movie then portrays several characters attempting to pursue this truth, only to end with the same woman completely contrastcouraging us each to embrace our personal interpretations of what the afterlife holds for us.

What originally intended to connect us by a single truth, ultimately lops us together as a bunch of liers. Not so beautiful.

PLAID! 5 repins

Laura Jensen

3 repins

Wrapped in elegance.

1 repin

4 repins

Laura Jensen

8.5

Justin Poulsen

Laura Jensen

Kendrick Lamar /// Good Kid M.A.A.D City 4 repins

Chris Montgomery

My dad would regularly warn the rest of my family to be on their best behaviour with the phrase, “Be careful, or you’ll end up in something Bryan writes one day.” It wasn’t a very effective warning now really, I don’t think there’s any warning strong enough that can stop my family from being themselves.

I’m grateful though that they were so strong-willed, as it was fun for me to sit back and watch how the reality of my family life was so much more electric, more entertaining, and more emotionallycharged than anything that was on the big screen.

There’s something inherently interesting about families; there’s something about the power they have over us to hurt or heal, to nurture or destroy, to empower or discourage that is eminently fascinating.

Picture this. When I was a young boy, my dad used to read comics with my brother and me. While my dad and my brother tended to laugh the same way at everything, I did not function that way. Instead, I’d sometimes laugh so hard I felt I might break a rib, while other times I’d be stone cold silent as the rest of my family laughed half-heartedly.

After observing this behaviour for an extended period of know what? If Bryan laughs, it must be because something is mation of my sense of humour was one of the dearest gifts he ever gave to me and I credit it as being the single biggest reason I do comedy today.

Picture This! is a play created

by TWU students, particularly the incredible nine member ensemble that has grown into a family over the creation process. We wrote stories and songs about our families, then put them together into this play. We laughed, cried, and cheered over the course of putting this show together, yourself doing the same as you watch it. Picture This! is sure to be an entertaining and original musical journey home that you will not want to miss out on.

Picture This! runs from November 20th to December 1st at SAMC Theatre. For tickets, go to twu.ca/

8 Teen Daze /// The Inner Mansions 8 repins

Chris Montgomery

in the Robert N. Thompson Centre.

Striped comfy sweater

Michael Kors boooooots!

Fossil!

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8 repins

Laura Jensen

Laura Jensen

20 repins

Laura Jensen

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Anthologie by Thrice” -Breanna Murphy

Bryan Sandberg

A&C.

November 21, 2012

Genre starter pack

CHECK OUT THE MARS’ HILL YOUTUBE CHANNEL!

You may not even have a clue that these genres existed.

For playlists of each of these genres

that remind us of sandy beaches,

FR

CH

BAR

DR

P clouds illuminated by rainbow moonbeams from the laughing moon. Many big dream

O

over a trailing choir of singing

EA

K

L FO K

many have forgotten. The sunkissed twang of the guitars,

W ILL

AVE

O QU EP

RF P

OP

POP

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by Bryce Perry

M A E

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For many, this genre may be a stretch, but not all freak-folk tation of different sounds, but

roque music through the large Hadron Collider, their collision, if not creating a black

bands still hang on to the folk or

their sound with other bands.

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sounds that resonate back to the

also offers a fair share of bubbly when listening to anything chill-

surfboard in exhaustion and is

bands are through-and-through -

the music a chaotic resonance.

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dancing than studying. considered freak-folk still offer undoubtedly catchy, and in some cases, beautiful tunes. All

the shade under a mango tree. mind though, that excessive -

Beach house – Zebra M83 – Wait Raconte-Moi Histoire The XX – VCR The Antlers – Hounds Active Child – You Are All I See

Francoise Hardy - Le Temps De L’amour Dum dum girls- Bedroom Eyes Best coast – Crazy For You Surfer blood – Floating Vibes Beach fossil – Daydream

chance.

Miami horror- I Look At You Washed out – Feel it All Around, Amor Fati Neon Indian – Polish Girl Toro y Moi – Biessa/Minors Tycho – A Walk

Lana Del Rey- Born to Die The Beatles – Eleanor Rigby Coldplay – Viva la Vida Vampire Weekend – M79 Fleet Foxes – Tiger Mountain Peasant Song Sufjan Stevens – Chicago

Tune Yards – My Country, Powa Dirty Projectors – Stillness Is The Move Grizzly Bear – Ready, Able The Mynabirds- Body of Work David Byrne and St. Vincent – Ice Age

Instagreat

Let’s give this thing a chance to change us for the better.

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CHRIS MONTGOMERY

Your dinner is not interesting. Even with a

exact same thing and wait around enough the masses started to join

Even though technology had brought us to an age where everyone can have a camera at all times,

down, every single one of us wants to

ture beauty with a lens. Now anyone to click believes they can do it, and,

Canons and Nikons that were giving us any sort of quality. A hierarchy still

tos. Not anymore. And there are only so many Macbook and latte #home-

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button something good will come out the other end.

feed is a transcendent journey into least now you know what to look for.

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clarity through my rain-smeared glasses, out of my frosted-over wind-

their images, and we could look at

3 MILLION BEFORE KODAK 150 MILLION O N I N STAG RA M 140 BILLION O N FA C E B O O K 380 BILLION JUST THIS YEAR

make the slideshow go by quickly, and we could tell our friends that we went through it slowly. Everyone was

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waiting for the movie, waiting for

and the beautiful. They say it takes a certain amount of hours to become

lessness of the internet gave birth to really give any concern for how good -

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by the things we see, and before you know it, we are actually creating beautiful things like never before.

truth. From an artistically critical Not only that, but these quantities but there has been a shift in the way we look at our world. beauty around us in a way humanity beautiful.

3.5 TRILLION ALL TIME

HOW MANY PHOTOS HAVE EVER BEEN TAKEN? What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Beauty and the Beast” -Tori Mannes

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November 21, 2012

A&C.

Star Wars gets a new hope.

Do you remember where you were? Do you ANDREW remember what STEWART you were doing when arguably the biggest entertainment deal in decades went down?

In case you’ve been hiding under a rock for the last three weeks, allow

released WALL-E, Up, Toy Story 3, The Muppets, and The Avengers within the

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Academy Award-winning Michael Arndt (Toy Story 3

writer, -

saw the silver lining to this news, the -

the chance to introduce them to a -

for Episode VII and Snyder have all said they won’t

massive deal shook the entertainment world, and weeks later, the

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a terrifying, intergalactic horror

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from Disney and he’s donating it to

a delightfully entertaining Ewok

Kathleen Kennedy, has stated that he already knows who is going to be sibility that by the time this article

can you not get excited about this?

announced (the front-runners at this Captain America Safety Not Guaranteed row, although this stuff literally be returning, but let’s not focus on Star Wars Episode VII now, in a theatre not so far, far away, we’ll be watching the continuing

sive cynicism in regards to the enterTransformers? Guess what? Sometimes that dying whenever something we don’t that Marvel is releasing the behemoth that is Avengers 2 this announcement came the news that Disney would continue releas-

to the days when things were fun and announced, did everyone immediately assume that we were going to Phantom Menace?

BROOKE HIGGINBOTHAM

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson” -Gillian Dunn

A&C.

November 21, 2012

Slowing down for the media fast

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An interview with PHIL 210 students abstaining from TV, movies, social media, and texting...all semester.

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EMMA SPANJER

M A R S ’ HILL: What prompted you to commit to the media fast

this semester?

LOGAN PAULGAARD: For me, this media fast came to be out of a desire to earn extra marks, a longing for freedom primarily from texting and Facebook, as well as the anxiety that arose from the challenge. To expand on that last point, I realized before the fast that I relied more heavily on media than I wanted to admit. The thought of not having that tool to rely on worried me, which ultimately indicated to me that I needed this fast.

texting everyone back immediately, checking it compulsively. Needless to say, I got rid of it soon after. I have a critical eye for things and have rather dystopian ideas about what a technophillic future could hold for us. I’m the type who thinks romantically about new monasticism and feels possessions like weight on my shoulders.

ALLICIA LUCK: Originally I decided to do the fast only because I wanted the bonus marks that we get from doing it for our class. I knew

my brain with nowhere to post them.

No Facebook or Youtube is a breath of fresh air, lots more free time.

Without my time-wasters (ie. Netflix) I’ve been forced to go for a walk or actually deal with my problems, incredibly rewarding. One night, in waste my time with, I channeled all my energy and wrote a play. It was much more than 140 characters, and far more rewarding.

understand and wanted to make sure I could do as well as possible. I have been so blessed by the experience.

MH: What things have been the LP: It actually hasn’t been all that hard. I came closest to texting someone when I wanted to text Translink, came. Having said that, what’s made it easier is that I’ve set my phone so that it no longer updates me when I -

ERIK DELANGE: I am naturally disposed to dislike social media.

I was the last of my peers to get a

usually watches a movie together on Sunday nights, so I haven’t been able to be a part of that. This has pushed us to do things where we’re personally engaging with one another.

ED:

became so anxious with being contactable 24/7, feeling guilty about not

Twitter. I have all these amusing and insightful thoughts buzzing about

MH: What kind of changes have you noticed, if any?

LP: I now feel better about how I use my time. I also noticed that the pool of people that I have connections with has shrunk, but the interactions are at a deeper level now. I am more comfortable phoning people – you’d be surprised how many people don’t answer their cell phone. That’s that now, whenever I turn on the

The trick to truly appreciating Skyfall is KAITIE SIMONSON to understand what Director Sam Mendes is attempting to

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of gadgets or late night rendezvous with exotic babes was going to save Bond this time. It had to be something deeper—a balance between the physical and emotional. Essentially, the main characters are forced to confront their pasts in order to survive their futures.

This movement away from toys and womanizing allows for a more intense understanding of who this hero truly is. But, if you still want to argue about this some more, then Brosnan as 007. This was a time when there were gizmos and women a plenty and yet the tone was completely skewed. Rather than being off as campy, presenting themselves

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JUSTIN POULSEN

By the end of Skyfall, my brow had more wrinkles than Dame Judi

What differentiates Bond from a Bourne, Transporter, or Mission Impossible movie? The gadgets, the women, and the villain—all of which Skyfall lacked. Of course there are a few other trademarks as well, but I should hope that no one watches Bond just for the bad puns.

Skyfall’s running theme is a sort of defense for the “old ways.” This could have been a brilliant opportunity to return to the classic exploding pen and Rolex laser, or showcase

Instead, the entire theme is used as a copout for not including any gadgets at all.

And yet, the majority of the entire movie’s plot rests on advanced and unbelievable technical hacking

radio, I am more appalled by the hyper-sexual lyrics.

MH: Do you think this will affect how you use media in the future?

LP: I was talking about this with my mentor last night, and I realized that I want to make this fast a more permanent part of my life, but I fear people will be annoyed with me if I do; as though I’m inconveniencing people by not texting.

ED: how I use media in the future. I’ve gained an outside perspective to just how zombie-like it is to sit around and stare at mindless sitcoms for hours on end. I hope to keep off Facebook as much as possible, but I can’t wait to post all of this insight to Tumblr.

MH: How do you see technology continuing to affect our future?

AL: I am in the education program so even just in that setting there are a lot of implications. I think society-wise the major problems are isolation and obesity. Social media promotes isolation and a lot of time in which one is not active. One can spend countless hours watching TV alone, and this promotes the idea of being a couch potato. Educationally, it will create social rifts in the classfosters a fear of getting dirty or get-

ED: Video games have replaced imagination, TVs on the wall have replaced artwork, movies have replaced books. Kids are learning to tap on a touch screen before they learn to speak. All of these things have a devastating impact on society. I think we all ought to be incredibly critical of the technology we depend on and see if we can do with as little of it as possible.

LP: In the 13th century the Imitatio Christi took place, where a number of Christians who were surrounded by excessive wealth became fed-up and gave their possessions away to follow their faith. I think we’ll come to that point eventually with media, where we become sick of the self-glorifying messages and the excesses that we’ll give it up. I think things like this media fast are part of that revolution.

with appreciation for God’s creation is a good one.

with any kind of substance.

Craig is able to stay true to the essence of his Bond, always orating with curtness and handing out oneliners like it’s nobody’s business.

The audience has the great privilege of experiencing the rugged and detached secret service agent in a much more vulnerable light, and he still looks damn good.

For me, there are few that have honed their craft better than Dame destruct, you watch in earnest as her character goes from a place of great command and prestige, to someone totally at the mercy of everyone around her.

Javier Bardem provides an unparalleled ‘tour de force’ as the menacing, bleach-blonde Silva who obsesses over M with such commitment and passion that it is truly a nightmare come to life.

His retelling of eerie childhood memories, uncomfortable sexual

old school or cutting edge, and as a result Bond is left with nothing but a rapidly diminishing skill-set and an underused tux to keep him classy and competitive.

Bond Girl Bérénice Marlohe, as Sévérine, may be the most underintoxicating combination of erotic ambition for power and complete apathy for life out of resignation to Silva, her overlord—all with just and a trembling hand. She’s even her I thought, “Finally, a Bond Girl with more than one layer to her character.”

And then she disappears; and who does Daniel Craig run around with for the next hour? Dame Judi Dench (insert shudder here). The roles should have, and easily could have, been completely reversed.

attraction to Bond, and total disregard for human life is what makes this character both cringe-worthy and absolutely intoxicating.

The only actor I didn’t care for was Naomie Harris as Eve Moneypenny. In fact, my feelings for her border on hatred. She pushed too hard at every turn, trying to become the kind of agent she could never be, while still attempting to project a certain wittiness and charisma with those infamous sexual undertones that Bond so enjoys. Maybe it was just the fact that her arms looked like she’d been doing Michelle Obama’s bicep routine that distracted me.

Despite the witty dialogue and jaw-dropping cinematography, my favorite part is when Silva came in on a chopper blasting John Lee Hooker’s “Boom Boom.” It sent chills down my spine and I couldn’t help but smile, knowing things were about to get real. Thanks to the no-nonsense believe it actually could be. bad. Despite Bond’s claim to already know everything about fear, Sévérine warns him, “Not like this.” After the whipping that Le Chifre gave Bond in Casino Royale (when every man in the theatre crossed his legs and winced), my mind is racing to comprehend the evil of Silva’s character that is apparently so incomparable.

To Javier Bardem’s credit, Silva does have some memorable moments—three actually—but all of these fail to shake, or even stir, Bond in any way. Indeed the spotlight on Bardem’s still-excellent performance is stolen by explosions and pyrotechnics. He’s given relatively little screen time and even less character development; it is only at begin to see the oedipal nature of his psychopathy.

Skyfall promises all the glamour and terror of a classic a gritty reboot of Home Alone. Oh, but Adele was great.

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Can’t Tell Me Nothing by Kanye West” -Riley Reimer

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November 21, 2012

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cameron_stuerle cameron.stuerle@mytwu.ca

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I will admit that I was wrong. When the Trinity Western University Men’s Volleyball team won CIS gold last March and wrapped up a dominant, near perfect season, I proclaimed them the greatest team in the history of TWU’s athletic department. I even went a step further, as I predicted that the volleyball team’s accomplishments would stand the test of time and become a gold standard for all TWU teams to follow.

It didn’t take long for all of that to become hogwash.

The TWU Women’s Soccer team erased the pain of coming up short at nationals one year ago to defeat Queen’s University and cap a truly special season—one that puts these Lady Spartans among the greatest CIS Soccer teams of all-time. The Spartans have now won four national championships, all since 2004, and have won three out of the Due to the Mars’ Hill production cycle, some time has passed since Colleen Webber scored to give TWU the penalty kick victory over Queen’s. You’ve hopefully seen or at least read about the game by now so, rather than regurgitate quotes and break down games that are now two weeks ago, I want to make an attempt to capture just how dominant this team was.

The list of accomplishments is staggering; 17 regular season/ postseason wins, a new program record. Kristen Funk recorded a record 13 shutouts and now graduates as the ‘winningest’ goal keeper in Canada West history. Krista season scoring record.

The most impressive aspects of the Spartans season were their simple mathematics. The Spartans did not yield Spartans put 3.5 times as many shots on goal as their opponents. The Spartans also had over twice as many corner kicks and over three times as many shot attempts as opponents during the course of the season. On two separate occasions, TWU did not give up a single shot on goal.

TWU’s most lopsided win last year was by four goals; the Spartans almost hit that as an average margin of victory this year.

The Spartans had to sweat it out for a while in the playoffs. They only had to sweat out four games during the championship with Queen’s. The Spartans were unable to display absolute dominance on the scoreboard during the playoffs. That factor is what unfortunately prevents these Spartans from being considered among the absolute best teams to ever play in CIS. At least, that’s what statistics would argue. I would argue from watching the gold medal game that this year’s Sparand passed beautifully and applying constant pressure, you could see Queen’s come to a realization. Queen’s quickly understood they weren’t talented enough to hang with the Spartans; they would have to lock down on defense and hope TWU committed a critical mistake. in net once again and TWU scored on all four attempts to clinch the banner. This was an incredible season; the girls were as dominant as any team I have seen in any sport at the CIS logo. The best part is, this team will continue to get better and be a threat again next year. Replacing Funk is a big concern, as is the graduation of key contributors like Byrne and Tessa Meyer. However, superstars like Webber, Boyd, Jennifer Castillo, and of course, Gommeringer Roxburgh to recruit elite talent to Langley as well.

The Lady Spartans will remain a threat to all who oppose them, considering how beautifully they control the ball and play defense, it may not matter who’s in goal next year. But that is an issue to address at a later date. For now, these girls have earned a right to bask in the glow of the greatest accomplishment they could have possibly achieved: being simply the best. cam_stuerle

2 hours ago

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Happy 33rd Birthday Stromile Swift!

As a child who grew up loving the Vancouver Grizzlies (and cried when they moved to Memphis) it would be easy to lament the failures of Swift, the second overall pick in the 2000 NBA Draft. However, that would be overlooking the fact that everyone in that draft ended up being mostly awful. Vancouver’s other realistic options at number two were Darius Miles, Marcus Fizer, Mike Miller, and DerMarr Johnson who all ranged from “mediocre” to “can’t do basic basketball things.”

Happy Anniversary NFL Player’s Union!! strike and returned to work. You know the whole NHL lockout that’s happening right now? Imagine if there was a CBA in place and players just walked out on it and tried to act like victims. Then imagine that instead of negotiating, the owners just hired replacement players and played the games anyway. Fun times.

Happy Trails (probably) Gene Chizik!

Chizik has undergone one of the most incredible falls from grace in college football since winning the National Championship in January of 2011. Less than two years later, his Auburn team in conference play. Chizik recently further compounded his problems by hiring an independent sure they were making curfew. Chizik is expectthis Saturday against Alabama.

What aredo you for when this year?

“Events the “22 Banana Challenge” - Jen Newman What song youmost wishexcited would play you walk into alike room?

by Taylor Swift” -Douglas Vandermulen

November 21, 2012

SPORTS.

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Can Vancouver have a second chance?

Of course we can! Bring ‘em back!

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Got Melky, Blue Jays?

Blue Jays World Series bound after early off-season haul?

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ANDREW PATTERSON

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What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? ”Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye” -Nate Rubuliak

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November 21, 2012

SPORTS.

In celebration of bad basketball Mars’ Hill documents the dead hours of the 24 hour tip-off marathon.

Every year, to celebrate the return of colCAMERON lege basketball, STUERLE ESPN puts on a 24 hour marathon of live hoops to be consumed by idiots and losers. I happen to be young, single, dumb, and in love with sports, so of course I fall into the target demographic of this telecast. I have attempted to watch all 24 hours of the marathon every year since the tradition started in 2008, but have never been able to do better than 21 hours in 2010. From Monday, November 12 through Tuesday, November 13, I decided to make another attempt at all 24 hours, but kept a running diary of the events. The following is what happened from Monday night through to Tuesday afternoon; the part of the marathon where I was the only one awake on campus, watching bad basketball and writing about it so the rest of the Trinity Western University campus didn’t have to.

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09:00 PM Monday: West Virginia at Gonzaga The marathon got off to a roaring start (at least for one team) with this

matchup. Let’s just say Gonzaga blew the doors off WVU and won 84-50 (and it really wasn’t even that close).

Gonzaga has its best team since Adam Morrison graduated and will be a threat, come March Madness.

11:00 PM Monday: Davidson at New Mexico New Mexico erased a 14 point of a packed house that showed up for a midnight local start time, ending at 2:21am. The thought of any TWU fans showing up under these circumstances makes me giggle.

01:00 aM Tuesday: Houston Baptist at Hawai’i Hawai’i basketball games are fun because every man who shows up, from broadcasters to coaches to fans, wears cheesy Aloha shirts. Basically, everyone who goes to a Hawai’i basketball game becomes your dad. My favourite detail about this game was that Hawai’i’s best player is named Vander Joakim, who sounds like a

stereotypical French villain in a bad action movie. Joakim lead the Rainbow Warriors (that’s their actual team

03:00 aM Tuesday: Stony Brook at Rider This is always the best game of the marathon (strictly for comedic purtime, which means both teams are hopelessly tired and lethargic. Also both teams are terrible, which leads to this fun equation: bad teams + lethargy = hilariously awful offense. Stony Brook had more turnovers (20) than

for one commercial every break. The big spender this year was Super Beta Prostate (last year was the Ab Roller), something that is easy for me to joke about now, but I will probably have a very different opinion on it when I’m waking up to take a leak six times a night 30 years from now. Valparaiso, which is not a ritzy lakeside resort but actually a small university in Indiana,

07:00 aM Tuesday: Harvard at University at Massachusetts This was a tremendous back and forth tilt that ended with UMass hit-

Rider shot a blistering, Spartan-esque that was a cheap joke. The Spartans they’ve been losing because they can’t get any stops).

05:00 aM Tuesday: Northern Illinois at Valparaiso Only 12 people are watching at this point, so ESPN sells advertising

thirty seconds to tie. Then they win outright as the Minutemen beat the

09:00 aM Tuesday: Temple at Kent State Nothing really notable about this game other than the fact that Temple has a player named Scootie Randall who is actually really good. Ol’ Scootie scored 31 points to lead the Owls

Flashes.

11:00 aM Tuesday: Detroit at St. John’s No jokes or smarminess here; it was great to see St. John’s coach Steve Lavin back on the sideline after ing prostate cancer. On a lighter note, St. John’s overcame a 10-point a basket by All-Name Team candidate Sir’Dominic Pointer. I am now positive I will put ‘Sir’ in front of my child’s name someday.

The marathon concluded with a horrendous Butler vs. Xavier game (Butler is evidently very far removed from the teams that made two straight event matchups between Michigan State and Kansas, and Duke and Kentucky. I made it all the way through to the end and was rewarded by being forced to watch Duke fans be happy, which is about as much fun as a root canal.

REC SERVICES Spring Break Trip to Haiti After a few “pipe dream” conversations between Rec Services’ Graeme Horton and student Tim Wray, they knew they had to make a Spring Break trip to Haiti a reality for Trinity Western University students.

And so it is. The newest Global Projects missions trip is a Spring Break trip to Haiti led by the pair. Global Projects does offer a missions trip to Haiti in the summer, but this trip is a way to allow more students who aren’t able take a month off in the summer to still have the chance to serve in the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.

The trip promises to be an exciting mix of construction projects, sports camps, and feeding programs where approximately 1000 children will be fed. There will even be an opportunity to take part in a mass wedding where 25 couples will be married in one day! The team will stay at Camp Mahanaim, located 30 minutes from Les Cayes. Participants will also be given the opportunity to see God’s beautiful creation with excursions to waterfalls and beaches.

When asked why this trip was so important to him, Wray responded, “After living in Haiti for 8 years, so

many missions groups have gone through and not one group has left without at least one participant saying the trip changed their life in some way. I want TWU students to have the chance to experience that. They have such potential for blessing the ministry that’s going on there.”

A team of 10-15 will go, and the trip is approximately $1700. Horton and Wray both promise this trip will change your life.

Apply online at twu.ca/global of contact graeme.horton@twu.ca for more information.

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Any song with Justin Bieber” -Ashley Kilian

November 21, 2012

myhumour.com a place to laugh.

Kaitie Simonson “live, laugh, love, lots”

Number one strei-fan

by Kaitie Simonson

Langley, B.C.

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Still in 2012

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Fresh to death So there I was, sitting on my bed reminiscing on my freshmen adventures at Trinity Western University. It had been a crazy few months, full of lots of adjustments and insanity. I have learned a lot and decided to harness this knowledge for the good of my felwith a few helpful pointers on how to survive the rest of freshman year.

1) Befriend the crazy people in orange shirts. You know the ones. They traveled in packs during O-Week, swarming unsuspecting vehicles and whisking away boxes before you even knew what hit you. There were many of them, and they were all very, very orange, but despite the burning sensation you get in your retinas when you beheld their vibrant tshirts, they can actually do more for you than carry your luggage to your dorm room. They can ofway around campus, and maybe even...be your friend? Woah.

2) Jump into every opportunity that comes your way. Sometimes this means literally jumping in, such as if you are the lenge and you have the privilege of diving into a kiddie pool full of...something. (Oatmeal? Pudding? Human fecal matter? We may never know.) But this applies to all manner of opportunities: Outreach ministries, Bible studies, LAN parties...just jump in and explore new things and don’t be afraid of looking like an idiot. People seem to embrace their idiocy here, rather than being embarrassed about it, so you pretty much have free license to do whatever you want. Unless doing whatever you want involves some form of nudity. Then I’d suggest not doing whatever you want. Please.

3) Don’t sweat the small stuff.

So you just transferred into Phimid-term (Side note: Mid-terms in September? Seriously? Who does that?) and you know you’re going to fail? It’s all good, just buy yourself a container of Häagen-Dazs and study extra hard for the next one. You went on a dorm date to an abandoned barn with Wiccan and it looks like the roof is going to cave in? No worries, just pull out you’ll be having fun in no time.

Crappy things happen to everyone in university, but instead of getting discouraged over disappointments and failures, look for the good in each situation. Unless it’s philosophy. You get a free pass to cry into ice cream over philosophy.

4) Lastly, don’t forget your roots. Even though I’ve spent the last 18 years living in Hicksville and the smell of cow manure reminds me of home, in a strange way, I’m kind of proud of that. You should be proud of where you’re from, too. I’ve gotten used to feeling like just “some dumb freshman,” but the diverse mix of people from all over the world and all walks of life is what makes TWU’s community so special. We’re all from different backgrounds, but we somehow got thrown together into this crazy group and everyone’s story brings something unique to the table. Country folk, smell your manure with pride.

Freshmen, rejoice in your naiveté and your ability to stay up until

There are very few things in this life that I am deeply committed to, and albeit obsessed with, more than the infamous and insatiable Barbra Streisand (pause for awkward laugh, eye roll, or confused expression). It is a love that very few in this generation truly understand or appreciate, one for which I am teased about on a regular basis, and yet my devotion to her never waivers.

This strange one-sided relationship began many years ago The Way We Were starring Streisand and Robert Redford at their very best.

From then on, I was hooked and my slight interest in this celebrity slowly but surely turned into an intense curiosity that should require me to wear a white jacket with attached sleeves while rolling around in a padded room.

The desire to be near her got so bad a few years ago, as I explained to a classroom of strangers a few weeks back, that I took things to a dangerous level. It was reading break and some friends and I had headed down to Malibu ing up Barbra’s book My Passion for Design, which chronicled the construction of her new home in Los Angeles, when I realized that, with the very minimal knowledge I had of the California coastline, by the pictures in her book. What I planned to do with that knowledge scared even me. We headed to the pier at Paradise Cove for breakfast (a diner I had heard she frequented) and I promptly began a lonesome yet determined trek Once I located the house, only one thing stood in my way: the mile high cliff on which it perched. So I began to climb, and realized my dream of scaling the wall was over I quickly backed away and came to my senses.

What did I think she was going to do if she found me? Bear hug me and sing the bridge to “Don’t Rain on My Parade” from Funny Girl?

Okay, well maybe I had hoped for that. With my dreams dashed and my spirits somewhat dampened,

we headed back to the car, which I had left unlocked with the keys in the ignition and running for two hours in the parking lot because I was so hysterical about the possibility of seeing her, and went home.

But the story doesn’t end there folks (lucky you). Just last month she began what was reportedly her last tour, and one of the stops was in Vancouver. So obviously I was beside myself with excitement, jumped on the web (do people still call it that?) and ordered that ticket to my destiny. Note: I said ticket, not tickets, which means exactly what you are thinking: I sat alone, and wouldn’t have had it any other way.

During the weeks leading up to the event I kept making quips to my mother about how she should prepare the guestroom incase Barbra needed a place to stay after the concert, or remarking on how excited she must be that I’m coming to see her. They were the kind of things you pretend to joke about but secretly dream will come true.

On the night of the concert, as I waited impatiently in line for souvenirs at Rogers Arena, reality hit me. If I had considered myself her biggest fan ever, which I did regularly, the women around me were quick to prove that theory wrong.

Though most of them could recall being teenagers during World War II and required orthopedics in every pair of their New Balance Velcro shoes, their love for Barbra was undeniable. One lady in front of me had an infamous photograph of Streisand tattooed on her back while another mother-daughter Alberta just to see her perform.

I was way out of my league. But that didn’t stop me from crying multiple times throughout the evening, taking pictures which were strictly prohibited and for which I got scolded for by security, and singing along too loudly, much to the dismay of patrons around me.

As I walked away in a haze, mostly because someone nearby was lighting up throughout the night, I realized that my dreams had indeed come true and it was a night I would surely never forget.

your assignments. You were born this way, baby, and it’s you (Yes, you!) who contributes something to the Trinity community that no one else can.

Good luck, fellow freshmen.

With these tips, hopefully we’ll all make it to April in one piece, plus a few extra pounds!

Tom

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “My Chick Bad by Ludacris” -Anna Funk

19

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November 21, 2012

Mars’ Hill

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Trinity Trends #tdub #ringbyspring twusahottub #clac

Dear haters, Soy milk is a delicious and nutritious drink, and I will continue to consume it proudly. Don’t project your fear of soy-based products onto me. Thank you.

Jew or Gentile?

This is a NAWKWARD question.

It’s totally valid.

A!ention girls of 3W: Water in a ke!le takes about 2 minutes to boil, not 10. I mean, don’t graduate, get a boyfriend, get married, have kids, see your kids have kids. . .AND THEN come turn off the ke!le. -.just sayin.

To the studly Spartan hockey player who sports jersey #17: I didn’t used to like hockey…but things changed once I watched you play ;)

every lecture you skip costs roughly $85.80. consider that next time you figure it’s not worth showing up.

Geese #langleyproblems Denny’s

I wish I had someone to make out with in a car in the dark outside of Macmillan. The two shadows of 630TLG, you’re making me jealous.

#movember #spartansoccerwin #papers #morepapers

I’d pin that.

#scottypix #biYOLOgy

“Sing me to sleep with something sweet”: 604-765-8792

#kissmas #2MuchNorma

I never know what to do when athletes hand me that piece of paper a$er chapel telling me to come to their games...does this give me free admission? Do I make a paper airplane out of this?

PictureThis! #SufjanStevens deckthehallball #washingtonroadtrip #mh1213

So Admiral Ackbar’s on the toilet and he’s like, “It’s a crap!”

Some couples who should have been an item but still aren’t... what the heck are you guys doing???

To the girls wearing dresses and heels on the daily...you are making the ratio of 3:1 WAY more difficult for me while I’m si!ing here in my sweats.

To the mom in my philosophy class, no I do not want to hear about how your life can magically relate to every SINGLE topic we discuss. Put your hand down.

BUY ONE

FREE

*

*excluding matcha

HEDLEY in the FRODO! #throwbackthursdays

Dear parents, Thanks for giving me a common name with an uncommon way to spell it.

Sincerely, My name is now never on those customized keychains.

I don’t have the balls to tell him, so I submi!ed a declassified.

Hey Charmaine, If you could give me a chance, I will be the best boyfriend ever! You can even make me your walking ATM Machine!!!!!!!!

snacks on snacks on snacks #lifeofacommuter

marrying the first boyfriend you had.. some call it beautiful, i call it lazy.

Is it just me that notices the cafe music? Sometimes we’ve got our classic Mozart, other times we have Jay-Z

being forced into a group paper of second years.. and Asians... shoot me.

Movember, movember the fi$h of movember.

DRINK

ONE

Stop trying to make “leggings for men” work!

I love technology but not as much as you see. But I still love technology. Always and forever.

Mitch Sorensen

SPAAAH-TAHN BUHGUH!

GET

I know you don’t get my texts because of your media fast, but you can read this so here it is: I MISS YOU!!!!!

Dear Undergrads, We at ACTS Seminary say Hello. You’re all amazing and God has amazing things for your life. If you are thinking about Grad School, come check us out... trust me, we don’t bite. We are hidden among you but we all think you’re great.

I will bake you delicious brownies in exchange for lessons in skills like ‘dougie-ing’ or ‘turning on a mac’

Year: unknown Height: 5’9 Business

Hometown: Kelowna Denomination: Non-denominational Fave preacher: Mark Clark Top quality in a future mate: You Fave Bible verse: Song of Solomon; all of it.

Fave hymn: Christ, from whom all blessings How do you know if it’s love: If I Views on courtship:

We go to Trinity. If I ask you out for coffee, it doesn’t mean I want to

of dating.

Skill that makes you “the one”:

I

marry you next week.

Idea of perfect date:

Head down to

Domestic talent:

Good age to get married:

My mom we’re in business. told me I’m a second-waver for marriage, so basiHow many kids do you want? 2 or 3 cally anything after 25.

Best place for a first kiss: Truth or Love languages? English and Gr. 11 French dare circle.

What song do you wish would play when you walk into a room? “Sexy and I Know It by LMFAO” -Naomi Tshimpaka