Volume 26 Issue 5: Saturnalia

Evangelicalism is a Nihilism PG. 12

11 24 21

ISSUE 05

VOLUME 26

the Modern Age. 10-11 th in Fai ng mi or ef

U W

ing Programs P s o l G. 4 yC l t en l i S

R T

Mars Hill

MAKENA WARDLE Editor-in-Chief

CARTER SAWATZKY Managing Editor

RACHEL WEGNER Visual Editor

GILLIAN SCOTT Copy Editor

Dear Reader,

MARITHA LOUW News Editor

KYLE PENNER Opinions Editor

BRAEDON GROVER SUNNES Humour Editor

SOPHIE HOLLAND Arts & Culture Editor

SCOTT BOWERS Sports Editor

LEX DIERSCH Staff Writer

We at Mars’ Hill are celebrating the Christmas season a bit early with our last issue of 2021, “Saturnalia.” The term Saturnalia refers to the ancient Roman holiday which eventually merged with what we now refer to as Christmas.

now, our province is in distress after being hit with a catastrophic storm, causing flash floods, mudslides, and irreversible loss. As we navigate these days, we wish you health and safety, and encourage you to search for the joy that the holiday season promises.

Just as we do with Christmas, the Roman people would close down their businesses, hang wreaths, listen to music, and give gifts.

Our modern holiday, which now also annually celebrates the birth of Jesus as its name suggests, owes both these traditions and the time of year it is celebrated to Saturnalia.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays,

Much like Saturnalia evolved into Christmas, we wanted to take this issue to discuss the many traditions around us that are also changing. In our feature article, “Reforming Faith in the Modern Age,” I talk with Shelby Bennett about how her beliefs have and continue to evolve. An anonymous contributor talks about choosing to refuse self-loathing and loving herself in “My Fat Body: An Apology.” And in “Institutional Prioritization or Devastation?” Carter Sawatzky investigates TWU’s decision to quietly close more academic programs due to its IPP.

Campus COVID Survey Corrections:

This year, we find ourselves in another atypical Holiday season. The remnants of a Zoom Christmas still linger as we cautiously make plans for family gatherings once again. And DIEGO BASCUR Staff Writer

MACKENNA WILSON Photographer & Social Media Manager

Mars’ Hill is a student publication of Trinity Western University located on the traditional ancestral territory of the Stó:lō people. Floated with funds raised by the Student Association, Mars’ Hill seeks to be a professional and relevant student publication, reflecting and challenging the TWU community, while intentionally addressing local, national, and international issues.

MISSION TO MARS

JARED KLASSEN Web Editor

The mission of Mars’ Hill, as the official student newspaper of Trinity Western University, is to inform and entertain its readers, cultivate awareness of issues concerning the TWU community, and provide a forum for purposeful, constructive discussion among its members in accordance with the Community Covenant, Statement of Faith, and Core Values of the University.

MEDIA ADVISOR: Loranne Brown

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Did you/do you experience any vaccine hesitancy?

No. -138 resp. - 57.7% Yes, concerns around data and research.

- 83 resp. - 34.7% Yes, concerns around rights and freedoms.

- 63 resp. - 26.4% Yes, other medical reasons. - 32 resp. - 13.4% Yes, religious reasons. - 16 resp. - 6.7% How do you feel about unvaccinated TWU students?

I feel uncomfortable - 88 resp. - 36.8% I feel neutral - 76 resp. - 31.8% I feel comfortable - 75 resp. - 31.4%

ZACHARY SIMONYI-GINDELE Illustrator

MARS’ HILL

CATE TSO Layout Editor

What is your vaccination status?

Double dose - 205 resp. - 85.8% Not vaccinated - 27 resp. - 11.3% Single dose - 7 resp. - 2.9%

EDITORIAL POLICY

Mars’ Hill encourages submissions and Letters to the Editor. Mars’ Hill reserves the right to edit submissions for style, brevity, and compatibility with the Mission, the Statement of Faith, the Student Handbook, and the Core Values of the University. Anonymous authorship of any material may be granted at the discretion of the Editor-in-Chief. Opinions expressed in Mars’ Hill belong to the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the editorial board, Trinity Western University, its officials or its Student Association.

CONTRIBUTORS

Sadie McDonald Taryne Lepp Sydney Dvorak Christa Lyford Amy Bebawi Jill Altamirano Josh Driediger

Faith Stanley Shelby Bennett Sam Rosenau Hannah Gallandt Mason Bourcier Samuel Wegert Nyssa Morgan

DECLASSIFIEDS SUBMIT YOUR OWN AT MARSHILLNEWSPAPER.COM/DECLASSIFIEDS

is it sad that TWU Confessions is my last hope of getting a boyfriend before I graduate? All you fourth year guys, its time to start noticing me Quote from Halloween weekend “she had a crush on Jacob launchpad” Carter Sawatzky deserves all the chocolate almonds & red wine the earth has to offer.

Serious question! Do RA have free dorms?

Grey eats his banana sideways… grey zander doesn’t own a rain coat. or rain boots. and he doesn’t blink. what is the deal with that. gosh. this boy….. the RA of 2/3 low is so cute #myheartisforyoubathlimb Steven Coulter’s ear holes (the ones with the bling) are making me stumble.

Moral Koala is the devil.

Disappointed to see the Colin Powell praise in the previous issue. Is no one aware of his participation in the My Lai massacre? Is no one aware of how he lied to the UN? Is no one aware of the catastrophic effect of the Iraq War, the war he sold to Americans?

RELS prof just acknowledged that the RELS department is all white protestant males, that it’s problematic, and I love it. Wish Trin would acknowledge that with the rest of their staff…

In response to last issue’s declassified about TWUSA music: there are both queers and massive TS fans on TWUSA and we will continue to play you very good music. Sincerely, several people

Follow @theatrebelongs on Instagram

LGBTQ+ people aren’t dehumanized here. Read Mars Hill, they run this ish. You aren’t a victim, pal.

Bruh. I did not shave my head? Just a trim :( C2B looks like Keemstar

Ben Montgomery is so hot, I am so in love with him!

I kissed a goose I’ve got to ask, why does everyone in here hate me?! - Holly’s boyfriend TWU confessions needs to be stopped.

To the short girl on the rugby team that took a picture of me with the flash on while I was trying to relax in the Well: wtf dude, that was weird and I was just vibing.

I was a straight A student when school was online. Now I’m failing in person :(

The Elser brothers are beautiful human specimens *chefs kiss* I was drunk writing half my cover letter.

Yo, why is it 6midjams?? It should be 6midcolors, they’ve got a Pink and Grey. What’s next guys? When is Purple moving in?

Can Mars’ Hill create a twu meme page please? Cuz then I might actually enjoy twu memes for once I wish I was as loved & supported as Kaitlyn Lozinski’s squirrel.

I swear the only person that can rock a mullet is that one guy on the Mars hill staff. He literally looks so cool all the time.

egg Anyone agree that the black squirrels have replaced the geese and taken over campus? Or is that just me? #BringTheGeeseBack that girl making out with the construction worker... blink twice if you need help Can someone send me the invite to the Anti-Fraser Dilf group chat?

There are theatre programs at other schools, you can’t just get a degree there?

The Atrium should be open 24 hours. Some people need a place to go sometimes.

brennan eats raw coffee beans for fun

SADIE MCDONALD

Ah yes, because @twumatch was exactly what we needed at this moment in trinity history.

Todd Dutka’s love for/openness about sex is what gets me up in the morning - I love you, sir.

People say that social media is bad for your health, but have they ever taken a course with Gary Schmidt?

6 mid looking absolutely sexcccc with the new bling

Those two construction chicks writing out violation tickets... I want you to write me one;)

Why doctors be so afraid of apples these days

Dear Moral Koala, did you ever act upon your homoerotic inclinations in college?

Joe Hill in the Dining Hall is a joke of an account. Joe I’m so sorry for the pain you feel and will be there for you if you need it. (I’m single btw)

How do you tell if a female CA is just doing her job or actually interested in you? Asking for a friend…

Joel Dyck, you are the best roommate a boy could ever ask for <3

The only difference between prison food and Sodexo is that prison food is free.

To the person who found a pube on their library desk: it was probably one of my beard hairs if that makes you feel any better, I also understand if it doesn’t.

Unrelated to the biting stuff… but does anyone know if Robbie has rabies..? Asking for a friend…

Robbie Down - we love your music, even the “sad” ones. Love, your sister dorm if douglas had to crown prom king and queen, it’ll go to @6midjams and @2.3lowdown. i said it trinity_memes_og may not be the meme page you want, but its the meme page most of you need I am not okay. Why is the reading break only 2 days? I thought it was supposed to be a week. :(

The four horsemen of relaxing indie music: Vance Joy, The Paper Kites, Novo Amor, and Hollow Coves.

Awaiting the day where og trinity memes gets shut down Please read: 1 Samuel 20:40-41, and 2 Samuel 1:25-27.

People think Mars’ Hill is ‘missing their market,’ yet, they still managed to pick up a copy of the paper in order to make that assessment?

Something doesn’t add up..

Just a reminder that IF homosexuality is a sin it’s not the only sin and many of you need to get off your religious high horse and check yourself before you wreck yourself.

to the guy always wearing a black vest, twu hoodie, and birkenstocks… sooo the steamy eye contact in the caf hey ;)

Incandescent (yellow) bulbs burn 10x more energy and last 1/5th as long as LED (white) bulbs. Convert your home to be more dormy.

Miriam Van Bergeyk is the real MVP

Headphones with chords have major sex appeal. Change my mind.

I almost died trying to drive out of school while the gates were closing in front of me…

I’ve single-handedly caused an armpit rash epidemic on campus.

Sorry in advance.

Don’t worry leif, you still look cute on crutches To the guy in Fraser who fanned his fart out the window: Thanks. We can smell it from here.

Jessie Elser de-aged 12 years when he shaved his beard off I have come here to tell my story, I am one of the victims of the armpit rash epidemic…

Hast thou considered my servant Mark Husbands, that there is none like him within all the earth?

To the boys at the soccer game catcalling and aggravating the UBC team (and fans) - you weren’t very Christlike Every now and then, I dream of Sierra Halldorson’s game winning pass in the CanWest finals.

Josh the security guard is so hot Tennesee Wesleyan University What is Dell’s last name?

Christa’s jar is bussing Sorry, I’m already dating Søren Kierkegaard, but we do accept thirds ;) Yep, I still remember that time I was interviewed for Mars’ hill because I was divorced #lifeinthebubble Hey people, if you want to find a local church that puts gospel truth over everything else, check out FLEFC. They’re incredibly biblical!

Butt is legs, Hank Green said so Hi my name is Abigail Sefzik and I’m still relevant My name is Savannah Noddin and I want Snopp Dogg’s babies.

Mexiqueen Cuisine is dead Madi Falk will you go to prom with me?

To the German guy at the volleyball party, she still loves you

Can people write more about Dell on Marshill? Dell seems to be an interesting person

The LLC is basically like being banished but for intellectuals.

Travis Scott sickens me “Let’s get this bread” is actually refering to the body of christ I just want to know who put a pineapple in front of my apartment and why?

Nothing says collegium culture like all the girls in the Marlie screaming over the arrival of the epic Sydney Bartel

I dk who takes the pic or edit the MH front page but damn it looks professional! Looking fly!

“Mark Husbands is in the soup” #11:07

Mark Husbands vs. Mark Driscoll.

Hm. Is there a difference? I hope there isn’t a podcast in 5 years called The Rise and Fall of Trinity Western University..... but I’m not convinced there won’t be.

Hey anonymous writer who wrote about aromanticism for the last issue! I care about your article. It is a high-quality article and is relatable.

I really liked other articles on marshill as well. Great job peeps marshill is a sick newspaper ;)

Just a reminder that Jesus came and died for us ALLLLLLLL. Just a reminder that we don’t get to choose who is a part of the body of Christ.

“Don’t move unless the crow speaks” - a wise proverb

I walk past the Music Building ears: Blessed soul: Revived life: Reaffirmed within me

Times ticking Holly, let that guy go

God loves every individual. But your open defiance still upsets Him. I made it through almost 4 years and I still couldn’t find anyone to get me an F’ing green card.

Hi guys! It’s me, I am at the LLC and yes I still go to this school.

Is this like a confessional?

when you think your hell week is over, only to realize you’re behind for the next week Kinda want to graduate. Kinda want to drop out.

Is LinkedIn a dating app?

Mars’ Hill editors reserve the right to edit or reject submissions based on content and/or length. A printed submission does not necessarily reflect an endorsement of any kind, nor does it necessarily reflect the opinions of Mars’ Hill staff, the student association, or that of the University.

CONTRIBUTOR OF THE ISSUE What is your major?

English.

Where are you from?

New Westminster.

What is something you’re passionate about and want to share with the world?

Something I am passionate about is storytelling because I believe that every single person has a story worth telling. Sharing stories cultivates empathy, and I think our society lacks tolerance for diverse narratives, which creates the belief that there is only “one story,” which is the furthest thing from the truth.

Why do you write for Mars’ Hill?

I write for Mars’ Hill because it is a great opportunity to gain experience while working alongside other writers and editors! I enjoy expressing myself through writing, and contributing to Mars’ Hill has enabled me to share some of my thoughts with a larger audience and engage with TWU’s community.

What is your favourite article you’ve written for Mars’ Hill and why is it important?

My favourite article that I have written for Mars’ Hill was “Wait, What?” It is important because while my argument focuses on the lack of epistemic humility in education, it also stresses George Orwell’s idea that language corrupts thought. Pretentious diction is so common in academia, rendering people unable to think critically about the world around them, which, in my opinion, is the most important thing one can learn in university. I encourage people to think about the words they speak because fancy language can be used to conceal the true meaning of a statement, if it even has any meaning at all.

Who is your favourite (fictional) character and why?

One of my favourite fictional characters is Scout Finch; I actually named my dog after her! Scout embodies Atticus’ values of equality, justice, and empathy, but she also has a strong personality of her own. I named my dog when she was just a puppy, but now that she is two, my Scout is quite similar to Scout Finch––her curiosity can get her into trouble!

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TRINITEA INSTITUTIONAL PRIORITIZATION OR DEVASTATION?: TWU SILENTLY CLOSING PROGRAMS CARTER SAWATZKY

In the September Mars’ Hill “Theatre Belongs” feature article, I investigated Trinity Western University’s (TWU) decision to dismantle the Theatre Department and the university’s controversial Institutional Prioritization Process (IPP) that recommended it. On June 29, TWU initially announced it was closing three academic programs (BFA in Acting, BA in Theatre, MA TESOL) but, recently, it has become known through word-of-mouth and by students immediately impacted by the decisions that there are greater than seven programs that TWU has decided to close. Some of these academic programs being “sunset” or suspended include the BSc Mathematics with Computing Science, BA Religious Studies, BA European Studies, BA World Languages, and at least one concentration and minor stream such as Physics. These decisions were made despite some of these programs not incurring any additional cost to TWU. No faculty positions will be affected by these changes.

According to an anonymous faculty member who provided the IPP Provisional Summary of Conclusions, there are numerous academic programs up for “further review” that could be recommended for eventual closure without notice. These programs are include but are not limited to: Chemistry, Chinese Language & Culture, Computing Science, Corporate Communication, French, Gender Studies, MA in Biblical Studies, MA in Educational Studies, Music, Philosophy, Social Science with Human Services, Spanish, and Sport & Leisure Management. The document ranks TWU’s 49 programs into five bins: four in the top bin of “Priority for Enhancement,” four in “Consider for Enhancement,” eight in “Maintain,” eleven in “Transform,” and twenty-two in the bottom bin of “Further Review.” This “binning” is the first step of what will ultimately result in a recommendation to the President. The IPPTF draws the following conclusions for curricular programs: 1. A small number of programs is generating most of TWU’s margin.

2. The 8 programs in the two top bins together contribute more than 4 times the margin of the 33 programs in the bottom two bins combined.

3. Business and Leadership programs have an outsized impact on the overall total program margin to the university, collectively providing over 50 percent of the total margin.

4. In our current situation, without Leadership programs the University would not be financially viable.

5. As a Christian Liberal Arts University, an array of programs is critical, including some that might not contribute much to the overall margin.

I reached out to Dr. Arnold Sikkema (Chair of the University Senate) for a statement on the additional program closures and this is what he had to say:

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“I was chosen by Senate to be its representative on the IPP Task Force, along with a number of others from various areas of the university.

The work of the IPPTF is confidential, and so I am not able to share anything beyond what has been made public. Program closure recommendations were not recommendations of the Task Force, but only of its co-chairs. The decisions regarding discontinuation vs. suspension have not yet been made, as far as I know, but will be decisions of the Board and/ or President, and the Provost will be making recommendations, a draft of which he provided to Senate for input at our last meeting (December 9).

The closure announcements were not all made at once; I think this is because the most significant ones, i.e. those involving job losses, were announced first. They are the most consequential, and specific personnel-related procedures (especially as regarding tenured faculty) needed to be followed. I do not know why announcements have rolled out the way they have. All of the programs that are closing (thus far) were recommended for closure by the IPPTF co-chairs. I am not aware of other closures forthcoming, but this does not mean this is the end, or that there will be more coming. As far as I know, the only job losses relate to theatre and MA TESOL.” I also reached out for comment from Herbert Tsang, Professor of Computing Science and Mathematics, Coordinator for Pre-Engineering, and Coordinator for Computing: “The decision from IPP was made to close “Mathematics with Computing” major. However, in a memo from the Provost to the University Senate (dated Nov. 6), Dr. Wood had recommended to the Senate that the “Mathematics with Computing” major be “suspended” and not “discontinue[d].” I believe this matter was discussed on November 9, 2021’s University Senate meeting. In our department, besides the Math with Computing program, the Physics concentration and minor options are also recommended to be closed. Closing Math with Computing means there will be less options for our students. Our original argument was that since there are no financial implications to the university, we should keep this option open so that students will have more course options to choose from in fulfilling their degree requirement. This program has been very popular for our students in the last 6-8 years (FYI: our BSc in Computing Science program was only relaunched in 2016).

Students in the program that have indicated their intention to pursue these programs will be able to continue. So, there is a “teach-out” plan in place and there should not be any adverse effect on their academic plan.”

I also reached out to Professor Thomas Hatina for comment; he is a TWU Professor of 22 years, Chair of the Religious Studies Dept., Director of the MA Program in Biblical Studies and Christian Thought, as well as the author of the IPP review for the Religious Studies Program. This is what he had to say: “After completing the IPP questionnaire at the end of the Fall 2020 semester, I received notification from my Dean on May 21, 2021 that “the RELS BA has been recommended to be discontinued by the IPP Task Force.” It was implied that since the closure of the RELS program does not affect faculty positions, there is no opportunity to present an alternative solution to closing the program. The reason given for the recommendation was low enrolment and that “it has provided limited benefits.”

I discussed the reason for the recommendation with my Dean and explained that since the program is an amalgamation of other programs, which are not being cut, it does not require funding, despite the low enrolments.

Ironically, when the program was drafted 2-3 decades ago, one of the main benefits for its creation was that it cost the university nothing. I also explained that since the new Core curriculum was founded (about 5 years ago) on the principle of extending student choice, it did not make sense to eliminate choice in programs, again when they incur no cost.

Only the students lose out. A Religious Studies BA in the Canadian University context provides for a widely-recognized major for those going on in grad studies, law school, and many other fields. Finally, I explained that as TWU expands to be a global university, and with increasing enrolments by non-Christian students, the Religious Studies major allows for not only expansions of course offerings, but also common ground among different religious affiliations. Religious studies is perceived in the Canadian academic context as being concerned with inclusivity, equality, and diversity in the public square.

In the end, I was saddened that there was no opportunity to address the task force’s specific reasons for its decision in relation to each one of the IPP questions.”

I contacted Professor Dennis Venema (Chair of the Faculty Association) and Dr. Bob Wood (Provost) but have yet to receive comment.

Questions still remain––why is there so little transparency about these program closures? What does this say about the liberal arts degree and variety of choice being offered to students? How many more programs are at risk of being “sunset” in the near future?

HELLO, IT’S ME, THE COVID LADY TARYNE LEPP, MPH RN TWU PUBLIC HEALTH LEAD

When I was asked for comment on last issue’s COVID-19 feature article, I followed up my statement with a request to respond further. It was a preemptive strike, thinking I would need to set the record straight somehow. Then I read the piece, repeatedly. I could not shake the feeling this is what I hope for in a discussion about COVID-19: the numbers describe who is in the conversation, the comments portray a community with a lot of common ground. When 42 percent of respondents report experiencing some degree of vaccine hesitancy, that means roughly 74 of the 213 immunized students can relate to 26 unvaccinated students. Those are strong odds for empathy. When comments regarding the divisiveness of mask and vaccine requirements are shown alongside those describing frustration that some might not take health and safety seriously, they reflect students experiencing similar feelings––albeit for different reasons. The piece captures a classroom in my head, with students getting a bit loud, yet engaged. I used to teach a three-hour lecture course, and my worst nightmare remains a quiet room of eyes just staring at me! Limited participation in the learning process always felt like failure to me.

Finding minds at work is a win; especially in public health, where I have never seen total agreement. Ever.

If you are less familiar with what I do, public health focuses on the health of others, plural—never only one patient, but the population comprised of individuals. It is a sector predicated on the social determinants of health and assumes others are in fact us, part of our team, influencing our victories and our losses.

Public health does not say you or that older person matters more, rather you both impact the world we all live in. We address more than one need at a time to meet as many needs as possible.

A couple things I should clarify: 1) the provincial health orders are laws, like speed limits, that apply to each of us individually and to organizations like Trinity Western University (TWU); I did not make them, and I do not have the legal authority to repeal them (no one at the university does). 2) Current on-campus housing density is roughly the same as it

was on August 24 when proof of vaccination orders were announced; yes, some residents subsequently withdrew from housing because they were unvaccinated, others moved in because the new requirements made them feel safer, some left because the risk still felt too high and other students departed for non-COVID reasons like any other semester.

“Public health does not say you or that older person matters more, rather you both impact the world we all live in.”

This pandemic is the same age as my toddler. Annie is 22 months old, and I often use her development to chart the path of COVID. She is nearly 3 feet tall— it’s been a long pandemic! In 2020 she started crawling as we all crept back towards each other. She is talking lots now, some words clearer than others; while we continue to learn more information about COVID-19, the vaccines, what is effective in the real world, all filling out our sentences. Like Annie growing up, our pandemic experience is new, sometimes even painful; coming back together this fall is positive progress, but it has not been without challenges. Mine is not a typical measuring tape, but it helps me stay focused on the human experience behind every COVID statistic or public health measure implemented; Annie reminds me to celebrate our successes and she motivates me to look for every square inch of common ground. If you do not feel heard, email me at returntocampus@twu.ca, I want to listen—I talk to students every week—and maybe I can help. If you feel discouraged, you are not alone, I do too some days. If you think that person who disagrees with you is a moron, take a breath, remember they learned to crawl and talk and probably woke up and checked their phone all just like you! Then, I encourage you to find a way to stay engaged in this conversation, because that is how we learn, and learning is what we do here at TWU, together.

VIP

SIR DAVID ATTENBOROUGH MARITHA LOUW

Best known for his voice overs of the documentary series Planet Earth, Sir David Attenborough has made a career as a writer and presenter of many films and television programs that advocate for various environmental causes. He has championed policies for mitigating climate change, expanding areas of natural preservation, and restoring the planet’s biodiversity. He has won two Primetime Emmy Awards for Outstanding Narrator, numerous medals for service to the British Crown, Peace Prizes, and he remains the only person to have won BAFTAs for programs in black and white, colour, high-definition, 3D, and 4K resolutions. In essence, Attenborough is widely considered as a national treasure in Britain.

Attenborough spent his childhood in a college campus where his father was principal. By a very young age, he had already begun collecting stones and fossils. By visiting different lectures and seminars offered by the college, Attenborough’s understanding of humankind changed. The idea that nature was being endangered by the reckless plundering and exploitation of human beings became a foundation upon which his advocacy work was based.

In his studies of geology and zoology at the University of Cambridge, those beliefs were only reinforced.

In 1952 Attenborough began work at the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) and became the producer and presenter of many natural history and children’s science programmes. He formed his own department, the Travel and Exploration Unit, which allowed him to expand the number and scope of documentaries televised in British television. For close to forty years, Attenborough was the champion of merging science and television together in a way to help humanity understand the complex nature of our planet.

In the last ten years, Attenborough has become a strong critic of nations neglecting their “moral responsibility” to stop the catastrophic effects of climate change. Speaking in a BBC interview, he said, “Every day that goes by in which we don’t do something about it is a day wasted.” Attenborough claimed that he and his filming team have been accused of exaggerating the threat of climate change for years, and now finally the world is starting to wake up and see for themselves the detrimental consequences of human activity in driving up global temperatures.

Speaking at the Glasgow climate summit, Attenborough was one among many climate activists who have admonished state leaders for their lack of action and commitment to helping the planet survive. He specifically called out the richest nations for ignoring the threats that are posed to the poorest nations: “Whole parts of Africa are likely to be unliveable…We caused it—our kind of industrialization is one of the major factors in producing this change in climate. Can we just say goodbye and say this is no business of ours?” Now 95 years of age, Attenborough says while he is not planning very far ahead, if he wakes up and still wants to do work, he will continue. After all, if the world will not take climate change seriously, his work is not yet done.

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SUDAN: ANOTHER MILITARY COUP ON THE WAY TO DEMOCRACY

FEMINIST NEWS

AMY BEBAWI

The road to democracy has not been an easy one for the nation of Sudan. The military coup that took place last month has proven to be a major roadblock along that journey.

In 2019, the three-decade-long dictatorship of Omar Hassan al-Bashir came to an end. Ongoing protests and a military coup ultimately removed al-Bashir and ended his prolonged reign, which marked the beginning of Sudan’s process of democratization. The military and democratic civilian government came to a compromising agreement to share administrative power until elections could be held in 2022 to replace al-Bashir’s government. The agreement was put in place in hopes of having an easy transition to a democratically elected and civilian government. However, this agreement has proven to be unstable and a threat to establishing a successful democratic government in Sudan.

Part of the power sharing agreement that was implemented in 2019 stated that General al-Burhan, who was acting as the provisional head of state, would hand his power over to a civilian official in November 2021. However, on October 25, just weeks before General al-Burhan was supposed to relinquish his power, a military coup took place under his leadership. The military dissolved the civilian-military hybrid council and arrested Prime Minister Abdalla Hamdok, his wife, and other civilian government officials.

After taking full control of the government, General al-Burhan has stated that the military would remain in power until the nation can hold democratic elections in July 2023. The military has also taken steps such as shutting down all internet and phone line services, obstructing all means of communication. The main roads and bridges leading to the capital, Khartoum, have also been blocked by pro-military protesters, making it difficult for people to enter or exit the city.

The Sudanese people are far from convinced by the military’s promise of a democratic government being established. They have been protesting and demanding that the agreements made in 2019 be upheld by the military. Protests, strikes, and organized days of civil disobedience have been taking place in many of the major cities in Sudan, including Khartoum. The military has responded to these protests, killing at least 14 people, wounding at least 300 people, and firing tear gas at those protesting.

The U.K., U.S.A., U.A.E., and Saudi Arabia have all urged the Sudanese military to return to the previous transitional hybrid and civilian-led government, and to release all the officials who have been arrested.

General al-Burhan has agreed to release four of the arrested officials but has not responded to any of the other pressures.

In recent years, the world has seen a considerable increase in military coups. Sudan is just one example of an unstable and shaky democratic government being overtaken by the military of the nation. After decades of using all means possible to ensure that countries in the Global South have democratic governments, the West is seeing some of that unravel. Despite the many democratic successes in the Global South, the increase of military coups has been significant in the last few years, and a factor that may prove to be worth considering as power continues to shift on a global scale.

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INTERNALIZED MISOGYNY AND TAYLOR SWIFT’S RE-RELEASES SYDNEY DVORAK

On November 12, Taylor Swift released her re-recorded version of her fourth studio album, Red. This is the second of Swift’s re-recorded albums, released due to a falling out with her former label, Big Machine Records.

Swift began her music career writing about her breakups and heartaches.

Her fans, mostly teen girls known as “Swifties,” heralded her songs as relatable, honest expressions of emotion.

Meanwhile, the media coverage Swift received was steeped in sexism. One Vanity Fair article from 2013 includes a photo of Swift with one of her former boyfriends and a paragraph stating: “This revelry will last for a month or two before news of a dramatic breakup hits, replete with quotes from anonymous sources and veiled tweets. And then, a year or so later, we get a catchy song about it!”

While the Swifties continued their support of the artist, others would assume her to be nothing more than a shallow pop star, one whose music would be too embarrassing to enjoy.

This internalized misogyny prevented a lot of teen girls from enjoying Swift’s music.

Now, nearly a decade after its initial release, Swift has released Red (Taylor’s Version), which includes all sixteen original tracks and fourteen bonus, or “From the Vault” tracks. Leading up to the release, Swift announced on social media, “And hey, one of them is even ten minutes long,” referring to the fifth track on the album, “All Too

Well.” It was also announced that the song would be accompanied by a short film. This news had years-long dedicated Swifties no less than losing their minds. Joining their ranks are thousands of young women, now in their twenties, echoing the same sentiment: “I can’t believe I hated Taylor Swift!”

Many women who misogynistically wrote off Swift’s music in their early teens when it first came out are now allowing themselves to enjoy the re-releases. The social media buzz around Swift’s recent albums folklore and evermore, in addition to her re-releases, has encouraged old and new fans to engage with the music and lyrics in more profound ways.

One long-time fan of Taylor Swift explained that “the power of music trending on TikTok is that people who previously underestimated Taylor or dismissed her as ‘the girl who writes about her exes’ are now interested in her older discography, which I think speaks volumes about how timeless her talent is.” It seems that Swift is, after over a decade, finally being assessed for her merits as a musician with much less sexist press coverage.

Swift’s re-releases are a feminist demonstration of taking her power back. After her experiences as a teen being taken advantage of by older men in the music world and the media, she has become a woman in charge of her own narrative.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE: A RESPONSE TO “AROMANTICISM, ASEXUALITY, AND AMATONORMATIVITY” BY ANONYMOUS FAITH STANLEY How to start this?

Should I tell you a little bit about myself? My personality? My family? My relationship with God? Or would you like me to skip straight to the sex talk?

I am a newcomer to the LGBTQIA+ community in name, with little knowledge of the complexities of gender and sexuality (despite being misidentified as a Poli Sci major by multiple boys on campus because I can intelligently voice my opinions).

Sexuality has never been a significant portion of my personal identity. As my name aptly suggests, my relationship with Christ is the center of who I am, and everything else about me falls into orbit around it. I had never given my sexual orientation a label, because it felt unimportant to my personhood and calling in life. It also felt a little ambiguous to me; I did not know a label that was accurate to who I am.

Only recently did I discover a little word: demisexual––someone who feels sexual attraction only after developing a strong emotional connection with a person. Perfect! I can finally claim my nominal place at the table of the ace spectrum.

“Whether you have a partner or not, you are seen, known, and deeply loved. God is the one who fulfills our personhood, because we were made by Her to live for Her.” I am very comfortable with my sexuality, but I am also fairly private about it. I do not see why it is anyone else’s business to know who I would like to have sex with. This writing seems a little counterintuitive to that, but after reading the previous article, “Aromanticism, Asexuality, and Amatonormativity”, I wanted to write a response and encouragement to the anonymous author and any other asexual or aromantic folks on campus––and maybe give the sexually and romantically-inclined student body something to think about too.

Asexual and aromantic orientations can be difficult to explain to others. When something is so outside one’s personal experience and the global expectations of society, it can easily be dismissed

as an excuse or falsehood. However, this is not an explanation piece. I will not argue for validation of my orientation. I do not fear judgment (because yours is not the judgment I care about), and my orientation holds no conflicts with my faith. I am not here to argue politics or theology––this is actually a fairly universal experience that crosses the sociopolitical-theological boundaries on our little campus and world. I hope everyone can remain open to hearing the message within their unique leanings and orientations.

“I am here to tell you that you are meant for more than loneliness” So, here it is: loneliness––that necrotic coldness that clenches your insides and withers your roots, this sensation of incompleteness that drives a good portion of humanity, at a personal and societal level. At the risk of sounding like your youth pastor, we keep ourselves busy by pursuing noise, achievements, and relationships in an attempt to drown out our universal inner decay. Our school claims it can mask it with “strong community,” but inevitably, it only turns up the volume of an already resounding clamour. Part of it can simply be attributed to the nature of our time of life––we are university students, focusing on our personal academic tracks, breaking down our personhood to discover who we are, preparing ourselves to enter the world as individuals, and experiencing chronic sleep deprivation. The other part of it is because we were created for relationships but live in a society that revolves around isolated units (the individual, the spouses, the immediate family).

Romantic-sexual relationships are a fantastically pleasant way of muffling the noise with an intoxicating cocktail of neurotransmitters that tell you that everything is just as it should be. In some sense, that’s true––we are meant for relationships (although not necessarily romantic or sexual ones), meant to have human contact, to commit to our relationships, and to have others around us to support and love us. However, this goodness can easily tip into degrading relationships that keep us from living as our full selves if we rely on them. “My person chooses me first and always will” is what we tell ourselves, but it’s a lie; that person will not always be there, and they will not and should not always choose you first.

Is it basic Christian behaviour to claim that Jesus is the actual solution to our problem? Probably, but I am not here to throw phrases at you to placate

your uneasiness. I am here to tell you that you are meant for more than loneliness. Whether you have a partner or not, you are seen, known, and deeply loved. God is the one who fulfills our personhood, because we were made by Her to live for Her. Our wholeness is in relationship with Jesus, and when we live that out in our lives, the loneliness dissolves; the aloneness may persist at times, but the loneliness disappears.

At the same time, we cannot be isolated units. As members of the Church––God’s people––we are also meant to live life with one another with the same dedication, grace, and compassion that God offers us. This means intentionally creating space for people who may be outcast and widening our vision to encompass not just our singular love, but communal love. If you have a partner, they cannot be your only focus. If you are single and possibly plan on remaining that way, that is not a condemnation to a life of solitude. The Holy Spirit draws us all together, and whether it happens in a traditional setting or something quite different, community will come when we all intentionally commit to it.

“This means intentionally creating space for people who may be outcast and widening our vision to include not just our singular love, but communal love.”

I hope that none of this is radical news for you, but if it is, I would encourage you to dig more into the topic and explore it with honesty and openness.

Hopefully, this can be heard and received as the encouragement that it is meant to be: God goes beyond our false bounds and desires to make us whole, and we should live this out by doing the same for each other, loving well regardless of status or orientation.

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HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MARBLES? SADIE MCDONALD Warning––spoilers ahead!

In a culture craving entertainment, Netflix has upped the ante with the announcement of a new television show intended to enthrall people. The release of Squid Game on September 17 did just that, as the thriller show quickly became the center of attention.

The creator of the show, Hwang Dong-hyuk, says, “I wanted to write a story that was an allegory or fable about modern capitalist society, something that depicts an extreme competition, somewhat like the extreme competition of life.” For instance, the sixth episode of Squid Game allegorically portrays the dangers of capitalism and exploitation of economic determinism in South Korea through the consequences of autonomous choice fuelled by greed.

I had a dream I got everything I wanted Squid Game follows gambling addict Seong Gihun, who is attempting to pay off his massive debt in order to support his elderly mother, as well as his young daughter who lives with his ex-wife and her new husband. After discovering his daughter is going to move to the United States, he plays a game with a mysterious gentleman who offers him an opportunity to win a fortune. Gi-hun is then abducted into Squid Game, where players are forced to compete to the death by playing children’s games to win 465 billion South Korean won.

Not what you’d think And if I’m being honest In the most popular episode, “Gganbu,” the players are instructed to team up in pairs under the assumption that they would be working together, only to find out that they are in competition with one another in a game of marbles, with the empty handed loser left to be executed. While all players are considered equal in the facility and given autonomous choice to play whichever marble game they choose, each is subject to the wealth inequality outside of the game.

It might’ve been a nightmare To anyone who might care Seoul National University graduate Sang-woo explains the rules of the game to Ali, a Pakistani migrant worker, and later angrily accuses him of cheating because he does not understand how Ali could have won. In desperation and a cruel turn of character, Sang-woo abandons the man who previously gave Ali his bus fare and replaces Ali’s marbles with rocks. He gives Ali back the “marbles” because “[i]t feels safer like that, doesn’t it?” he says, giving him false reassurance, keeping the real marbles to secure his survival. In betraying Ali Sang-woo simultaneously betrays himself; he was once a businessman and now he is a threat.

“Squid Game allegorically portrays the dangers of capitalism and exploitation of economic determinism in South Korea through the consequences of autonomous choice fuelled by greed.”

Player 240, one of the young female players, and Sae-byeok, a North Korean defector, decide not to play and share their life stories, with Sae-byeok revealing that her brother is in an orphanage and Player 240 confessing to murdering her father. In an intimate moment, the women bond and reveal their names to one another––Kang Sae-byeok and Ji-yeong––before Ji-yeong throws away her chance when butchering the last-minute marble game, providing the rationale of: “No matter how hard I thought, though, I got nothing.” Sae-byeok’s

story showed Ji-yong what she does not have - a family to live for. Perhaps the only altruistic autonomous choice, her sympathy for Sae-byeok turns into sacrifice as she realizes that money cannot buy her happiness.

Gi-hun partners with the eldest contestant Player 001, who labels him as a Gganbu: “It’s a good friend. One who you trust a lot. You share things with them, you see?” But Gi-hun loses his composure as Player 001 spends time during the game searching for his childhood home due to the confusion inflicted by his brain tumour. As time starts running out, Gi-hun takes advantage of Player 001’s lapse in memory and tricks him into thinking that he won. Just as Gi-hun thinks he is safe, Player 001 pulls out another marble and suggests betting it all on the last one. Gi-hun immediately objects, claiming that it does not make sense, and Player 001 responds:“Does tricking your friend like that make sense to you?” Player 001 gives his last marble to Gi-hun and just before he is shot, remembers his name: Il-nam. It is a case of the first shall be last, with Il-nam being the last to lose his marbles and the Gi-hun being the first to take on true remorse for his actions.

While the characters choose to play different marble games and use a variety of strategies, all undergo a radical shift in morals, leaving behind their rationality in pursuit of survival. The wealth inequality in South Korea creates a mounting sense of economic anxiety and necessity for financial stability, in turn birthing a society constructed on economic determinism. Squid Game was conceived to provide an opportunity for monetary gain, but prosperity comes at a price: capitalism’s corruption of conscience.

If I knew it all then would I do it again?

Would I do it again?

Billie Eilish - “everything i wanted”

SAMC THEATRE’S AWAKE: COLOUR FROM THE DARKNESS LEX DIERSCH

In the midst of turmoil and uncertainty, SAMC Theatre presents AWAKE, a play written by its cast and crew, created solely from the memories, stories, and letters from theatre alumni. It shares the joy, grief, love, and heartbreak that both past and present students have shared. Soulful and raw, this show is sure to bring tears to the eyes of its audience.

AWAKE gives a voice to the outcasts in this boldly honest tribute to the legacy of the theatre department. It is a testament to the community formed within Freedom Hall. Filled with heartfelt monologues and profound melodies, accompanied by bright spots of joy, love, and comradery, AWAKE is the department’s response to the recent news of

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its imminent “sunsetting.” It is a chance to reflect on the history––the laughs, tears, moments of discovery, and deep connections to both the art, and the people. I was on the verge of tears for almost the entire duration of the show, but it was not until the most joyful moment did my tears finally fall.

AWAKE runs from November 23 to December 4 in Freedom Hall, RNT, with evening performances at 7:30 p.m. Tuesday toSaturday, as well as Saturday matinees at 2 p.m. Proof of vaccination is required and masks must be worn at all times. Friends, family, fellow students, and faculty are all welcome to celebrate the legacy of this department through the deeply moving tribute of AWAKE.

Photo by Jeff Gibbons

FREDDIE MERCURY, KING OF ROCK SOPHIE HOLLAND

November 24, 2021 marks the 30th anniversary of the passing of one of the greatest icons in British music history: Freddie Mercury (1946-1991).

For those who do not know, Freddie Mercury (born Farrokh Bulsara) was the lead singer of the British rock band Queen, which formed in 1970 in London. The band consisted of Freddie Mercury, drummer Roger Taylor, lead guitarist Brian May, and bassist John Deacon. Queen is known for songs such as “Another One Bites the Dust,” “Don’t Stop Me Now,” “We Will Rock You,” and “Bohemian Rhapsody.” Their music contains a broad variety of sounds, perspectives, lyrical themes, and other features, giving them a strong and well-rounded repertoire. Queen continues to be a favourite band of rock music fans today, as Taylor and May currently still perform, and musician Adam Lambert has been their lead vocalist since 2014. In my biased opinion, Queen is the greatest band alive.

Frontman Freddie Mercury was everything that the world could ask for in a rock music icon. He possessed the gift of a strong vocal range, and was incredibly theatrical, from his costumes to his dance moves. Mercury was not afraid to push the boundaries in order to entertain––he would express himself, but also establish a connection to the audience. The late David Bowie, another musical star who worked closely with Queen, said that “the last person at the back of the furthest stand in a stadium would feel that

he was connected.” This is evidently true, as Mercury employed this theatricality in connecting with the audience through his infamous, “Ay-Yo!” call and response at Live Aid in 1985. Freddie Mercury wielded great power, and he used this power for good.

“Despite his tragic passing, Freddie Mercury’s legacy lives on––musically, theatrically, cinematically, and culturally.”

Freddie made history not only as a rock legend, but as one who overcame many social and cultural barriers.

As a gay man of Indian Parsi descent, and an immigrant from the island of Zanzibar, it was no question that Mercury faced oppression, along with unimaginable pain. However, this musician was unapologetically himself. His authenticity and honesty showed many others how to follow the same example. Freddie was one of many brave icons who paved the way for others like him to be their authentic selves.

Sadly, in 1991, Mercury passed away due to complications related to HIV/AIDS. Per the end credits of the film Bohemian Rhapsody (2018) based on the life of Mercury and the journey of Queen, he spent the last years of his life in a loving relationship with his partner, Jim Hutton. However, despite his tragic passing, Freddie Mercury’s legacy lives on––musically, theatrically, cinematically, and culturally.

Queen’s music is beloved around the world, and has been for many years. Popular Queen songs are continually used in movies and television. The 2018 film Bohemian Rhapsody may have led to a spike in popularity three years ago, but nevertheless, Freddie’s voice continues to echo through our speakers and bring joy to our lives. He composed and performed many songs with which anybody of any age can connect. (I can personally attest to the fact that Freddie Mercury made a huge impact on my life, despite passing away ten years before I was born, as one of my first favourite bands when I was little was, in fact, Queen). People will always remember the moving, funny, and powerful videos of Queen’s live performances.

As Mercury said himself, “I won’t be a rockstar. I will be a legend.” Mercury’s music, as well as his impact on art, culture, and society, has immortalized him on earth forever.

IMITATION AS SATIRE: THE EVOLUTION OF MEME BURNER ACCOUNTS ON TWITTER SCOTT BOWERS

When I hear the term “burner account,” my mind instantly imagines a moody celebrity or under-pressure politician with a bone to pick with the media’s perception of them. Knowing they cannot say what they really want in public, they turn to an anonymous account to speak their mind within the public domain, either to stir up positive conversations about themselves or to speak slander towards others. The draw of anonymity has its obvious benefits for public figures who get to do very little outside of the limelight.

We will never know who has these accounts, yet every once in a while, we do see a public figure slip up and expose themselves in hilarious ways.

accounts,” (and yes, that is what they call themselves), to a varying amount of dedication, will post repurposed content of a certain public figure to make commentary on any number of trending topics.

For those of you completely lost, here are a few examples. The @TheSASBurner on Twitter, is as their description states “The Meme “Burner” Account of Stephen A. Smith.” Stephen A. Smith is a highly polarizing sports commentator who is known to say many outlandish things. This account posts small clips and edited pictures of Smith, commenting on a bevy of trending issues.

The burner account now has over 115,000 followers on Twitter, although the original iteration that got taken down for copyright issues had over half a million followers at its peak.

This idea of a burner account, or a place for those in the public eye to privately place their thoughts on the internet like the rest of us normal people, is something that is and will continue to be ingrained into the landscape of social media.

“Imitation is truly the greatest form of flattery. Culture continues to prove this to us time and time again. These satire accounts are just the newest form of that, and they do a pretty hilarious job of it as well.”

These are just a few of the most popular examples out there. Yet, it would not surprise me at all if sometime soon more of these accounts in all different areas of culture started to pop up and gain a serious following for the satire comedy they provide. I could only imagine the content out there for an Alex Jones or Ellen Degeneres meme burner account. The possibilities are endless.

Exhibit A: Late Night Talk Show Host Jimmy Fallon in 2018. After a public Twitter beef with President Donald Trump, Fallon made a donation to a charity that supported incoming refugees and immigrants in Trump’s name; the late night host took to Twitter to let the world know. The kicker is, he also felt the need to pat himself on the back with a tweet reading: “This is great!! Thank you.” The tweet, most likely meant for a burner account, was sent from his own verified account. The tweet was quickly deleted, but thanks to the power of screen captures, the slip-up lives forever.

However, like everything else in this wonderful world of ours, things are always changing. In the case of “burner accounts” on Twitter, the term is slowly being hijacked, where users are creating accounts to meme the idea of what a burner account is. These “burner

The real Stephen A. Smith has very rarely even come close to acknowledging the account exists, despite the burner account’s responses to his tweets having

more interactions than Smith’s tweets themselves.

However, we do know he knows the account exists.

After the burner account made an April Fools’ joke, where they edited a picture that showed the real Smith following the burner, Smith responded with a quote tweet that stated, “You Wish.”

In a very similar style, many different attempts to make an account memeing the abundance of content of Donald Trump. There are a few with followings in the tens or hundreds of thousands that can be found on Twitter currently, but none of them have been active for a while, seemingly due to bans. Nonetheless, the content and following is there.

Imitation is truly the greatest form of flattery. Culture continues to prove this to us time and time again.

These satire accounts are just the newest form of that, and they do a pretty hilarious job of it as well. It just goes to show how creative and resourceful people on the internet can be as social media forms continue to grow in ways we could have never imagined.

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REFORMING FAITH IN THE MODERN AGE: AN INTERVIEW WITH SHELBY BENNETT MAKENA WARDLE

Faith exploration, deconstruction, evolving faith: these are all terms used by people who have decided to take a deeper look into the Christian framework, and evaluate the foundation of what they believe. This journey, however, looks different for every person who takes it, each embarking on it for different reasons.

Regardless, this process is often misunderstood: it gets mislabeled with the colloquial Christian term “backsliding,” or equated with “falling away from the faith.”

However, often those who are undergoing a re-evaluation of their Christian beliefs are not merely calling it quits. In fact, many of these people who are deconstructing––or whichever term they have decided to use–– are some of the most intentional with their spiritually. Reconsidering the beliefs one has held for one’s whole life involves introspection, investigation, and what can feel like a never ending amount of inner work.

One of these people is Trinity Western University (TWU) alum Shelby Bennett. In July 2020, Bennett posted the piece “Ending Up Free: maybe losing my faith and maybe finding more” on her self-titled blog. After an eloquent and heart-tugging retelling of her doubt and wrestling over the past years, Bennett explained the state of her faith as this: “I haven’t landed the plane. I’m not ‘in’ or ‘out,’ and that is intentional. In a culture that is obsessed with knowing, with believing, and with being right, I am waiting, challenging, and allowing myself to always take the next step, whatever direction it leads.”

A year later, Bennett posted the follow-up piece titled “Finding Rest: a year of wrestling, healing, and letting go,” in which we hear what she has discovered over the past year of exploring her changing faith. Bennett does not use the term deconstruction to define her journey, but rather says that she is “exploring new ways to experience spirituality, physicality, intellectualism, and everything else.”

I sat down with Bennett for a thoughtful conversation where she shared more about this process, her time at TWU, and how she came to find “that grieving the Jesus I knew and rediscovering myself were profoundly and beautifully tied.”

Mars’ Hill: Can you tell us a bit about yourself? Did you grow up in the church?

Shelby Bennett: I definitely grew up in a very evangelical, fundamentalist church.

And of course, growing up, I didn’t see it as anything that was extreme or unusual. It didn’t feel cultish at all, and I still don’t see it that way. It was a wonderful childhood; a wonderful upbringing with people who were really loving, and a community that supported each other. The dream of peo-

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ple bringing each other casseroles when you need it. And I was also homeschooled and did a lot of leadership and apologetics and worldview training, especially through high school. So I was very rigorous about my faith all throughout growing up, with regular Bible reading and church attendance, and then ended up doing a couple years of missions work in China before going to TWU. My goal was to be a missionary, and then I decided to get a degree after that.

“I started to feel like Jesus was also being misunderstood by the way we’ve interpreted things for 2000 years, and that his gospel and his Kingdom of God didn’t necessarily mean what we had made them mean.”

MH: What was your experience like at TWU? SB: I loved TWU and my whole experience.

I loved the community. I lived on campus for four years and just was involved in pretty much everything you could possibly be involved in. Anyone who was at TWU with me will probably remember me for starting the prayer ministry, and being an RA and a CF, and really trying to build into community. I think we all grew a lot. There were definitely times that we disagreed with things that were happening in our administration, but overall, it was a wonderful time of life.

When it comes down to everyday life, I wouldn’t have chosen to be anywhere else.

different factors involved. I think starting to see the real patriarchy and gender elements that were at play in the Bible led me to see the Bible through a different lens.

Then, as someone who grew up absolutely foundationally built on the Bible, the fact that that foundation shook at all started to shake everything. Even in my master’s, which the emphasis was biblical studies but through the lens of gender studies, I started to see how, even if the Bible is the Word of God, that doesn’t also change the fact that is written 100 percent by men, or that there were people who chose which books were going to be in and which books were going to be out.

MH: Is there like a term or a phrase that you would use to describe the journey that you are on?

SB: I do kind of avoid the word deconstruction, because there’s so much associated with it. But, in a lot of ways, it is an accurate analogy for slowly piecing apart everything that you’ve built in your life. My mom likes to call it my reformation, so that’s also a great word, and I think is much more positive. When you think about even the Reformation with Martin Luther, that totally was the deconstruction process of their time.

But I’ve just called it my faith journey, for the most part. At the beginning, it definitely felt like doubting and questioning and struggling, but it doesn’t feel that way anymore.

I wouldn’t say that I’m struggling or questioning, I feel like I’m more just living life.

MH: What led you to decide to share your story on your blog?

SB: It really started for me in earnest in the summer of 2019, and about a year later was when I first wrote something about it. At that point, I was still in Canada, and I was a year into my master’s, and I think I kind of felt like I owed it to people.

MH: What did you study during your undergrad?

SB: Linguistics with a minor in Biblical studies was my undergrad. So that was through CanIL and my goal was to be a Bible translator. And then I ended up going into the MA of Biblical Studies kind of as a last-minute decision.

I needed to explain, as much as I could, why this was happening because there’s so much misunderstanding out there. I knew that if people caught wind through the grapevine rumours that “Shelby’s not Christian anymore,” or “Shelby is losing her faith,” or something like that, then there would be so much misunderstanding. There are all these people out there who are attributing causes of deconstruction that are inaccurate, like that people just want to sin, or that they didn’t have a strong enough faith. And I didn’t want anyone to write me off. I felt like I needed to explain. I have been very public for a long time. I have had a blog for ten years, right? So I was either gonna disappear or be pretty straightforward about it.

MH: For those who have not yet read your blog posts, can you share a bit about what led to you deciding to explore new aspects of your spirituality?

SB: There are so many moving parts and

MH: You recently tweeted about how the idea of deconstruction misrepresents your experience, and that all you have been seeking “is truth and Jesus.” Can you elaborate on this?

SB: I kind of have a whole article that arose at the end of that Twitter thread, I think that was about wanting people to really genuinely believe me that my number one priority was always Jesus. I had such a real relationship with him and l loved him more than anything in my life. There are many things I’m not still actively trying to figure out, but one that I do still want to pursue is, “Who is Jesus?” He was someone, and he was a very powerful someone: these teachings are unlike anything we see anywhere else. Whoever he was, was clearly compelling enough to the people around him that it became this movement. I read the Sermon on the Mount or different teachings, and it still gets me in my heart and my gut.

A lot of the answers I was given just didn’t really make sense.When you read the Gospels and just Jesus teachings, and you try to read it––as much as possible––without the lens of all the things we’ve been given, it’s just not the same. I started to feel like Jesus was also being misunderstood by the way we’ve interpreted things for 2000 years, and that his gospel and his Kingdom of God did not necessarily mean what we had made them mean. Even the fact that when he talks about hell, or he talks about Gehenna, I don’t think he is talking about the same thing we are talking about. Maybe his picture was actually a lot more beautiful. Maybe he was pursuing something else.

I mean, I remember when I went to counseling for all of this faith change for the first time, and I really felt pretty good about it––like, I had a pretty good handle on everything. But when she brought up Jesus, that’s when I lost it. I was like, “I’m so afraid of losing this person.”

MH: You wrote on your blog that “grieving the Jesus I knew and rediscovering myself were profoundly and beautifully tied.” Can you tell us more of what this means to you?

SB: Through a TWU lens, everyone knew me as the prayer person: I led prayer trainings, and I taught so many groups of students how to listen to God’s voice. One of the things that I taught all of them was to have these little squares of paper, and I always had one in my pocket or in my backpack or something. Throughout the day if I felt like God was saying something to me, then I’d write it down. Sometimes nothing really came of it, and other times really crazy things came of it. Like I mean, I still have those stories. Like I don’t really know what to do with that.

What I realized in a lot of ways, it did feel like the line kind of went silent all of a sudden, when I stopped making the effort. But then in a lot of other ways, the voice that I had listened to the most deeply was still there. I think the most obvious way to put it

is that my journals didn’t change. I realized, when I stopped doing that, I was still just as equally deep and thoughtful, and that a lot of the guidance I’d thought was from God was actually my own wisdom that was still valuable and still there. It’s not like I suddenly had no idea what to do with myself or anything. Just reading some of the teachings of Jesus where there are these themes all throughout the Bible that you can draw on and the different ways of having Christ in you is one of the main messages of the New Testament.

I love Star Wars, and the image of the Force is actually one of the most helpful ways that I’ve found to still hold on to some kind of concept of God. In some ways, it is separate and outside of you, but another way, it’s everything that’s most deep to all of us and something that is ever present. It shares a lot of the characteristics of God.

“There are many things I’m not still actively trying to figure out, but one that I do still want to pursue is,“Who is Jesus?”

He was someone, and he was a very powerful someone: these teachings are unlike anything we see anywhere else.”

MH: How has this process affected your community and relationships? Do you have advice on navigating these relationships during this process?

SB: For the first year, I didn’t really tell anyone, because I was very afraid of leading people down the same path. At that point, I really didn’t feel like I knew where it was going, and so I didn’t want to bring anyone with me. It was so painful. Essentially, it felt like Jesus had died to me, and that he was still alive for other people. And I was like, I don’t want to kill him for them. And then it kind of came to the point where I couldn’t just pretend that I still thought and believed all these things, and my closest friends could tell. But I found that, for the most part, the people who loved me still love me. I know people have had some

really horrible experiences with family too.

Luckily, in my story, my friends have been wonderful. For the most part, what I was afraid of actually did happen: most of them have also kind of begun this process of rethinking and piecing apart their faith. But none of them are mad at me about it. Like this is something that, you know, they feel like they are also being intellectually honest and doing an important actual journey that they needed to do.

My advice if people are afraid of sharing is that you need to trust people to take responsibility for their own faith––they can make their own decisions, too. If people are working on trying to break the news to their friends and family that they are having questions and doubts, I would say be gentle and give people a chance to slowly soak in what you’re saying. Especially if they maybe still believe that this means you’re going to hell, that’s a pretty big deal. Just give people the benefit of the doubt and let them ask questions. I think we get so afraid of people’s response that we start off defensive and abrasive, but I’ve tried very hard to not be that way. In our very polarized world, if we can be people who aren’t trying to attack, and just be honest and acknowledge that people are going to have a hard time with it, we can help by being a non-violent presence.

MH: Do you have any resources or any more advice for people who are going through a similar process?

SB: For me, it was Rachel Held Evans. I loved her approach, because she just felt so non-violent. She clearly still loved Christianity, and was actively critiquing it; Searching For Sunday was like the first thing that made me feel totally seen and understood. Barbara Brown Taylor is another incredible one: she wrote Holy Envy.

She is a Christian Anglican priest and professor of religion, and yet is writing about seeing God in many religions, which is pretty big. It’s the same attitude of just looking for beauty, still treasuring Christianity as a Christian, and yet also being able to affirm other religions.

There’s actually a really cool website called SoYoureDeconstructing.com. It’s full of resources. The first one might be like a video or an article, and then it moves all the way down to full courses you can take online.

It separates it all out by issues, so there is Hell, and gender or sexuality, or women in the Bible––it’s really great.

Where to find more from Shelby Bennett: Blog: www.shelbybennett.blogspot.com Website: www.shelby-bennett.com Twitter: @shelbyrbennett Instagram: @shelbyreneebennett Tiktok: @shelbytalksbible

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EVANGELICALISM IS A NIHILISM SAM ROSENAU

Christianity can often be associated with the notions of love, mercy, and hope. Love for one’s neighbour, to care for them; mercy for the other, to show dignity to them; and hope, that the evils of this world will one day be overcome and brought to justice by means of Christ’s reconciliation. Reconciliation through both Christ’s return and the promise to live alongside him forever in that place we call heaven; where the pains of Earth will be washed away by the light of God’s throne room, and all suffering caused and experienced will irrevocably cease.

This idea of heaven is an attractive and agreeable idea. An idea compelling enough for millions of Christians across several decades. But what I wish to put forward here is that the subscription to such ideas has within themselves an inherent nihilism.

But not a nihilism you might find in, let us say, The Big Lebowski, or your favourite French existentialists. No, it is a nihilism much more subtle and much more insidious. It is a nihilism that stems from a heedless avowal of this heavenly expectation, where the presentiment of an ethereal afterlife forsakes the material world God so loves. But how can something as stark as nihilism be synonymous with a religion soaked in hope?

Well, because this evangelical nihilism does not explicitly fit in the popular understanding of nihilism, usually understood as a school of thought that proposes nothingness and meaninglessness in an absolute sense. It deems the choices you make pointless, and so forth with your aspirations and even your drive to formulate something meaningful in light of an awareness of nihilism. It really is all just for naught.

Fortunately for many of those who identify with evangelical Christianity, their concept of God keeps this threat of traditional nihilism at bay.

Christianity has natural and intrinsic elements of meaning-making by means of a master-deity, commandments from said being, and incentives to carry out such commandments. Chrisitianity is—ostensibly—so purpose-driven that it seems utterly incompatible with anything nihilistic. The problem is, however, that the purpose generated from evangelicalism is deeply integrated with Platonism, which is ultimately the cause of its own sense of nihilism.

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For the sake of this article, Platonism can be understood as follows: a school of thought that believes in a disembodied, spiritual reality that both supersedes and denigrates the earthly, material world we find ourselves in. It supersedes the material world by looking forward to an actualized and incorporeal realm and henceforth maligns human life by an inherent low-view of all things physical.

“And this is why I say that this evangelical nihilism is subtle; it is disguised by a message of hope, but practically executed through indifference.”

Does this not sound familiar? For the better part of my upbringing, this is what I thought Christianity was. The goal is to exit earth and enter heaven, and too often can we come across passages like: “[W]e would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord,” or “Do not love the world or the things in the world,” or “[W]e who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air.” And, because of the apparent immutability of Plato’s ideas, we still cannot help but immediately interpret scripture in a Platonic sense, but doing so is just simply amiss. A Platonic interpretation of scripture is an ill-suited and contrived approach to the Bible that, in turn, gives the reader both a false understanding of its ideas and implants in them a surreptitious nihilism. It forms an inaccurate interpretive method both philologically and historically, and at the same time gives rise to a nihilistic worldview.

If we want to first talk about philology and history, I will use one word for the point to be made: soul.

This word is so commonplace and so often interpreted Platonically that most do not even know its definition within a biblical context. If you read the word “soul” in the Bible and think of some celestial, unbodied noumenon, you are already on the

wrong foot. This concept of soul, by and large, does not exist in canonized scripture. Rather, what I understand to be a more accurate idea of “soul” is much more holistic. If we look at Greek words like psuchē, sōma, or sárx, or a Hebrew words like nepesh, the overarching theme of definition is that they denote a sense of an entire self, flesh and all.

The whole body, the whole person, and how they relate to the earth they occupy. It grounds the individual and generates a rooted purpose for life on Earth. The Platonic sense does the opposite.

If a Christian worldview is based on an anti-Earth, anti-flesh Platonism, by what form of motivation are Christians drawn to care for this planet and its inhabitants? From homelessness to the refugee crisis, global poverty to climate change, what does it really matter if one day all will be made right? The anticipation of a Platonic heaven and/or Christ’s return strokes a broad brush of apathy and leaves those in need at the wayside. Just recently I had a conversation with an individual about the opioid crisis on the Downtown Eastside, and after a few polite exchanges, the conversation simply ended with: “Oh well, Jesus is coming back.”

And this is why I say that this evangelical nihilism is subtle; it is disguised by a message of hope, but practically executed through indifference.

If there is anything I can glean from a degree in Biblical Studies, it is that Jesus’s message to the world was primarily Earth-bound. Look how he prays to his father in the gospel of Matthew: “Your kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is already in heaven.” Throughout the gospel accounts, we find this particular deified man setting an example of what can motivate human beings: bringing heaven to earth. If we understand heaven—without a lens of absolutism—as a place with no mourning, or crying or pain, the concept becomes far more realistic. What actions can we employ that comfort the mourner? What world can we form that takes away the pain of another?

Personally, I am not even sold on this idea, and any kind of nihilism, or at the very least pessimism, is always available to me. But I will certainly choose the version that gives a s--- about humanity over the contrary.

MY FAT BODY: AN APOLOGY ANONYMOUS

I apologize to all my skinny, beautiful, healthy friends. I am sorry my body exists. I am sorry my fat body exists. I am sorry I’m not on diet pills and appetite suppressants. I am sorry I don’t workout everyday to burn 500 calories.

Also, sorry that I am completely and ridiculously in love with my body. I love the curves I was gifted. I love looking in the mirror and seeing myself.

And no, I don’t just see a body-positive woman.

I see a person of colour, an activist, a sister, a daughter, and an artist.

I know it’s difficult to understand my pride, so let’s talk about that a little. I grew up with a “healthy” mother. My mother’s weight had remained a stable 54kg from her teens, all the way to age 28, when she had me. Stretch marks made themselves known to the side of her stomach and the insides of her upper arm. Then came my brother, and with him, came another set of stretch marks.

She gained weight and became a pudgy 70kg.

At age 49, she struggled with several family issues and ended up losing all that baby weight.

My mother, now at age 51, is 50kg. She loves her body.

I love her body too, and I love that she takes pride in herself. But she dismisses the “fat period.” She was on every diet and workout imaginable. None

of them worked. I watched my mother look at herself in the mirror, flattening her stomach, sucking in air, and pressing down her abdomen.

At age 17, I asked God what I did to deserve this body. I gave up on myself and ate every piece of junk that caught my eye.

This is how she raised me. She hated her fat body, and demanded I hate mine too. Throughout my life, the women in my family made it a point to mention my weight gain. When confronted by my aunt, I made the mistake of mentioning that I was not on a diet. She was beyond shocked, and told my grandmother, who told my mom. Back at home, my mom and I talked about “what type of family we are” and “we prefer to be healthy in this house.” I needed to have an excuse for my size.

You do not say things like that to a 13 year old, I just didn’t know that yet.

“I would like to apologize from the bottom of my heart, to all my healthy, skinny friends.

I am sorry that I don’t hate myself.”

At age 14, my mother assigned me a nutritionist.

I was on a strict diet which included all the important vitamins and proteins a “healthy” body is supposed to intake. “You will feel so fit and strong after you lose a few kilos.” This lasted about two weeks before I begged my mom to let me eat real food again.

At age 15, I was introduced to the colour black. I wore black every chance I got, because I read in some magazine that it hides your fat and gives the illusion that you are slimmer than you seem.

At age 20, I wore my first spaghetti strapped shirt in public.

It took a lot of other body-positive, fat women to make me realize my body is okay. It is okay to have a double chin, and a belly, and arm fat, and thick thighs. It is okay to eat pizza, hot dogs and hamburgers, without hating yourself. So, I apologize from the bottom of my heart, to all my beautiful, skinny friends. I am sorry that I don’t need to be you.

I am so incredibly sorry.

TO HAVE FAITH: A DIVE INTO MORMONISM DIEGO BASCUR

How do we define our faith? Where do we begin?

I try to navigate these questions, search for clarity, a straight path that will lead me to answers. I have found no such straight path. Instead I have found something far greater; the path that twists and turns, leading me through the wonders of human nature, broadening my perspective. This path has defined my faith, and I am grateful for it.

“I have felt the strangeness of the Mormon faith, but it has left me questioning the strangeness in my own faith.”

In the past few weeks I have been learning from a number of my friends about their Mormon faith.

I have seen the faces of this religion and I have felt their devotion. This journey has led to many questions, doubts, and emotions. These findings, I believe, are important in every aspect of faith, and worth sharing. As I said, the winding path leads to many sides of faith. It is the hope of this article to show faith in a different light, to see one’s own faith in a different light.

The Mormon world is a strange one indeed. Not strange in the sense of being alien, but in the similarities that put it so close to Christianity. It is interesting to think of these similarities and even more interesting once stereotypes are broken and one gets a clearer picture of this faith. From

the outside, a non-believer looking at Christianity and Mormonism could say they compliment each other, and perhaps would not find a difference in converting to either one. Obviously, this would be false and those in either faith would most likely disagree with this outlook, however there is something to be said about these similarities.

When in a Mormon environment, the prayer, the importance in evangelism, the testimonies, even the importance of the saviour can be closely tied to most Christian communities. In these aspects, if anything, their faith was agreeable with mine and in their faith I felt genuine connection. I find that far too often the search for differences and reasons to ostracize is a very present trend in many Christian’s lives. If it is the difference we seek, then a close-minded faith quickly follows, and from there, a limiting relationship with God. It should be a Christian’s duty to find connection with this world and those living in it, so that faith spreads and one’s own faith grows.

Over the past few weeks, I have heard many aspects of Mormonism—shocking truths and clear differences between Christians and Mormons.

These differences are just as important as the similarities, if not more so. In fact, these differences have helped me grow in my own faith tremendously. Understanding the relationship between the two faiths is key in showing faith in a different light. The biggest difference from what I can tell is the Book of Mormon itself. To be brief, the book is the accounting of prophets in North America, who tell of Jesus Christ coming to the people of North America as the resurrected saviour. The difference lies in what the book means as a whole. Which is (in my understanding) a replacement of the bible and the instrument that the Church of Latter

Day Saints uses to separate from other churches, claiming it is the one true church. It is the reason why Mormons evangelize to Christians, for Christians are not fully saved without the acceptance of the book in their eyes. I find it interesting, however, that across denominations, we experience extremes in the Christian spectrum that are just as drastic as the extreme of Mormonism. From Calvinists to Arminians, Universalists to Conditionalists, Christians experience a difference in opinions across the spectrum. Division exists, it is a reality, it really depends on us how we take it; for it can be used for growth, but decay is constantly looking to seep in.

“I find that far too often the search for differences and reasons to ostracize is a very present trend in many Christian’s lives” We must seek those who oppose us in order to find deeper meaning in our beliefs. Over the course of this journey, I have found stronger faith, doubt has faced me, but growth has come out of it. I have felt the strangeness of the Mormon faith, but it has left me questioning the strangeness in my own faith. What details have I skipped over that might require more contemplation? I have found this to be true: it is necessary to have challenges to your faith, so that reflection may come, and through that reflection, growth.

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REALITY VS. HYPERREALITY: A REFLECTION ON TECHNOLOGY KYLE PENNER

The philosopher of technology Albert Borgmann makes a distinction between reality and hyperreality. This, he claims, is the distinction that matters in analysing the nature of technologies and their influence on us. The real has a commanding presence. It engages us holistically as our bodily presence is intermingled with past experiences and future potentialities. The hyperreal is artificial, on-demand, and, stripped of the fetters of mundane realities, it is infinitely available.

“The hyperreal lacks the ability to command the attention of our whole person, it is always superficial and fails to reckon with the potential depths of human experience.”

Reality is the exertion of dragging a toboggan up a snowy hill, sliding down in a few moments of exhilaration, then hoisting the toboggan and beginning to hike once again; it is one day coming back to the hill and realizing that the snow has melted and that the season for tobogganing is over. Hyperreality is being efficiently whirled to the top of a mountain on a chairlift, skiing smoothly down wellgroomed slopes of artificial snow and repeating, ad nauseam; the sun dropping below the horizon is no reason for the fun to end: the lights will switch on and the slopes remain open in defiance of natural limitations.

It is important to realize that something may be more or less “real” in the sense that we are talking about. The ski hill in its contemporary form is still “real” in many ways, and is probably more real than it is hyperreal, but there is no doubt that hyperreality is present. It is also important to realize that these terms do not map cleanly onto moral categories; the real is not necessarily “good” and the hyperreal is not necessarily “bad;” rather, they are useful categories by which we can meaningfully apprehend our world. That being said, it seems to me that the loss of the real in favour of the hyperreal is a loss, one that will be increasingly felt if many current trends continue. The hyperreal lacks the ability to command the attention of our whole person; it is always superficial and fails to reckon with the potential depths of human experience.

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Consider social media as an example of the hyperreal. A social media profile is an abstraction of a person; it grants instant, on-demand access to a person and their life; it is accessible anywhere and anytime; it is a glamourized depiction of life, always enjoyable and easily digested; it is engagement with others without any of the drawbacks imposed by physical limitations. Friends and followers are tallied up giving a measure of social standing; likes and retweets are similarly a quantifiable measure of others’ engagement with us.

Social media is socializing unfettered by reality; it is social hyperreality.

The hyperreality of social media can be parasitic on the way we live out our real lives as well. We put ourselves in service to the hyperreal representations of ourselves, and how our online personas are perceived becomes as important as how we are perceived in reality–or perhaps more disturbing, online perceptions of people are substituted for real perceptions of them entirely. The impingement of the hyperreal on the real in our lives is often subtle. It is often not cleanly one or the other and often the same technologies can be used in the service of either one.

On campus a couple of weeks ago, some strange confluence of the forces of weather begat one of the most stunning skies I have ever witnessed. The firmament was split in two—half the deep blue of rain and half vibrant golden yellow—and among their mixing together in the middle: two rainbows bisecting the horizon. It was truly magnificent. And outside on the lawn? Heads upturned, looking, and then looking down at their friends to be sure that they too were witnessing this wonder. There were of course many photos being taken.

“Posted to social media, the photo itself becomes the locus of value, rather than the experience being captured; the experience becomes an opportunity to share a photo.”

A photo does not automatically demean the moment or admit an unhealthy capitulation to hyperreality. What does indicate hyperreality, however, is when the photo and the landscape swap places in regards to their importance. A photo is a tool

that allows us to capture just a little bit of what a moment was like; looking through old photos (especially with others) can be a means through which fond memories are re-lived and bonds of relationship strengthened through the shared reminiscence. The photo, though, as a means of constructing hyperreality is very different: functioning in an almost entirely opposite manner.

Posted to social media, the photo itself becomes the locus of value, rather than the experience being captured; the experience becomes an opportunity to share a photo.

“Communal celebration done correctly engages the whole person and is not superficial; take the time to think about whether the way that you use technology draws you deeper into your experience of the world or if technology brings an artificial character to your existence.”

We are moving into the Christmas season now and there is no better time to take the chance to reflect on the way that the technology we use impacts our lives. Borgmann was very keen on the power of celebration and community as combatants against the hyperreal. Traditions require patience—we wait for Christmas all year—as does dealing with the bustle of the holiday season and the people. It is worth it, though. Communal celebration done correctly engages the whole person and is not superficial; take the time to think about whether the way that you use technology draws you deeper into your experience of the world or if technology brings an artificial character to your existence.

Technology when used properly supplements our reality, brings it into clearer focus, aids us in relating well to each other and to our world, and edifies us; when technologies themselves become the reality that we experience, they become hyperreal.

What is your major, year, and hometown?

I’m a third year theatre major, and I’m from Oregon City, Oregon.

When did you first get involved with theatre, and why?

I first got involved in theatre in highschool, in my sophomore year. We had just moved from California to Oregon, and my parents saw that I needed to make friends, so they said, “You’re joining the drama department! That’s just what you’re doing!” I just fell in love with it––the community, seeing how everything worked together, the background––you’re just in it no matter what. It’s just awesome.

Do you do more acting or behind-the-scenes? Which one do you prefer and why?

I prefer the behind-the-scenes stuff. It’s really cool to be sitting in the booth up there and watching everything unfold. I call the cues, so every time the lights change or you hear sounds go off, I’m the one doing that. You can ask the actors––I’m always the one telling them to be quiet when the director is trying to teach them! I’m managing, I make sure I know where they’re moving, that they’re here on time, I do the scheduling; it’s a lot of work, but I love it so much.

There’s something about knowing exactly how everything happens that’s so awesome. My number one goal as a stage manager is for the audience not to know I’m there. It’s so cool to be sort of like the puppet master!

You are the stage manager in TWU’s Fall production, AWAKE. Can you tell us about it?

Yes! AWAKE is a devised piece, which means the cast is creating their show based on stories the alumni have given us about being in the theatre department.

So, the entire show is a remembrance of what has happened here. It’s a “Hey, wake up! We’re needed here!” It’s really powerful to see how many lives theatre has changed, and how many stories I’ve heard from alumni just from being in rehearsal every single day. What they are doing now––helping people because of their [theatre] degrees [at TWU]––it’s saved so many lives. There have been multiple alumni that would not be here if it were not for theatre. This show encapsulates all that for everyone to see.

Is theatre something you would like to pursue professionally? How will you use your talents after you graduate?

My dream job––I would love to be a stage manager in my future career. It is awesome and just such a cool job. But, if I don’t go into theatre, it’s such a great skill to have anyway, because I can manage anything at this point. Event planning, wedding planning––I can do that because of what I do here. I could manage a grocery store if I wanted to. It is a very easy skill to put into anything.

What are some favourite shows or pieces you have ever been a part of? Are there any you would like to perform in someday?

My favourite show to stage manage was New Generations (2020), because it was not just theatre kids who were performing. We actually had quite a few business students, and a few education students. I really liked that because it brought in a lot of people not from the theatre department. It really showed that theatre can be for everyone and not just the weird theatre kids. I only had friends in the theatre department before, but now I can walk around campus and know at least one person when I’m walking to or from my room. A dream show to stage manage would be any of the plays from The Play that Goes Wrong. They are so funny! Basically, they will stage a play, and everything falls apart, but it’s all part of the show. Everything that goes wrong is intentional. My favourite would be Peter Pan Goes Wrong. I think it would be so fun because the stage manager would have to be all over that. All the things that go wrong would have to be super planned and rehearsed multiple times.

I feel like it is the ultimate stage manager show because if you can get that done, you can do anything.

It would be so fun to do one of those shows!

You can see Hannah’s brilliant stage managing skills put into action at the current Fall show, AWAKE, live and in person from November 23 to December 4 at the SAMC Theatre.

Tickets available through the TWU Website at: “Current Show.”

Proof of vaccination and government-issued ID are required for entrance to the theatre. All audience members must wear masks.

How did you first get involved with basketball?

I started to like basketball in grade three or four, but I didn’t start playing until grade six.

I had played pretty much every sport growing up, but when I made Team BC for basketball, I focused on that most. My best sport was baseball, but to me basketball was such an imperfect sport. It was so difficult for me, which made me like it even more. I was so obsessed with basketball, it wasn’t hard to drop my other sports, especially after I made team BC. What basketball opportunities have you had before coming to TWU? I originally went to UBC, and had offers from Grand Canyon University, Maine University, Penn State, as well as Carleton University. I liked the coach there, and the program was good. I was at UBC for two years, and then a preseason for my third year, which was the peak of my play there. Eventually I left UBC after that preseason, and went to Carelton. Going from UBC to Carleton University was tough because of COVID, mostly. So as soon as I got there, we started to feel the effects of COVID, and I was pretty much locked in my room for a good amount of the time. It wasn’t like there were any problems with the team or the coaches, it was just I didn’t really get a chance to play because of the pandemic. Everything was limited in practices, classes were online, and even meeting people was tough because of the restrictions. Eventually I left Carelton, which was tough because that had been my dream to play there, at that top level. After Carelton, COVID did not make things easier, as restrictions were kept strict, and so I was considering quitting basketball, and that same week Trevor [Pridie], our coach, called me and asked me to play at Trinity.

How did you decide on coming to TWU? Through injuries and having to take one season off because of COVID, it was tough just having to practice on my own, and even tougher not being able to go to a gym and practice.

Like I said, basketball not being part of my life was on my mind, and eventually Trevor called me and asked to come to Trinity and play basketball. It was nice that I knew Trevor before; he has lots of experience and is probably the biggest reason I came here. If Trevor wasn’t the coach I wouldn’t be here. It is nice to have someone with that much experience to lean on and trust he wants what’s best with the team and is someone who knows the game well.

How do you hope to turn those struggles into wins, moving through the season?

I feel like I haven’t played like myself. I feel like for years I have been focusing on my own journey, and I think that I need to start investing more into other players as individuals, and bring a certain level of intensity. I think two years of not playing basketball has been hard, and coming back even tougher, and it is always a different dynamic playing a game than just practicing. I want to find that love for the game again, because right now basketball feels like a job, and I need to go back to that passion. It isn’t just a switch I can just turn on: it comes through patience and hard work, it can’t be something that is forced, it has to be genuine love. Hopefully, everything comes out of that love, and the team feels that effect. It is tough when you are losing and no one really knows why and there is just confusion when we know we are better than this. Sometimes practices are tough, and the energy isn’t quite there and other times practices make us feel like we are a top team, and a team which can make it to Nationals.

Where do you see yourself after TWU? Pro.

SPARTAN SPOTLIGHT

MASON BOURCIER Year: 4th Major: Philosophy Team: Men’s Basketball team Position: Point Guard

ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

HANNAH GALLANDT

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F1 WORLD TITLE CHASE: THE DUTCH LION OR THE BILLION DOLLAR MAN? JILL ALTAMIRANO

As the 2021 Formula 1 season ends, there is one question every fan cannot help but wonder: will the 2021 Champion of the World be Max Verstappen or Lewis Hamilton? Throughout the current season, the championship-points lead has been exchanged between the two drivers several times—the closest points race for a championship since 2018. As the line is drawn and sides are chosen as to which driver is favoured more highly for the win, understanding the stakes and the history that is potentially being made are of the utmost importance.

“In layman’s terms, Verstappen was born and bred for speed” Despite coming from near opposite upbringings, Max Verstappen and Lewis Hamilton have one thing in common: instinctive racing style. In the case of Verstappen, the Dutch Lion, such talent is expected, his father being former F1 driver Jos Verstappen and his mother being Sophie Kumpen, a well-decorated and well-respected kart racer in her own right. In layman’s terms, Verstappen was born and bred for speed. In 2013 he won the World KZ Karting Championship and was quickly signed by Van Amersfoort to compete in the FIA Formula 3 European Championship. At 16, Verstappen took the F3 championship to a new level, winning his sixth race and the following six after, finishing third overall.

Conversely, Lewis Hamilton was born in Stevenage, Hertfordshire, to Anthony Hamilton and Carmen Larbalestier, who divorced when he was two years old. The Brit loved racing from a young age and his father worked four jobs to support his racing career. Despite dealing with socioeconomic barriers, racism, and the sheer uphill climb it takes to make a career out of racing, Hamilton beat the odds and is looking to beat them again.

At 24 years old, Max Verstappen, if crowned, would be one of the youngest World Champions in the history of the sport. The lion-hearted Dutch driver debuted with Scuderia Toro Rosso in 2015 at the age of 17, making history as the youngest

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driver to ever compete in Formula 1. In several interviews, Verstappen stated that he did not yet have a driver’s licence at the time of his debut.

On top of being the youngest driver to ever score points, a year later in 2016, after being moved from Toro Rosso to its senior team, Red Bull Racing, Verstappen took the metaphorical bull by the horns, winning his debut race with Red Bull Racing. This achievement made him the youngest race winner in Formula 1 history, taking the checkered flag first in Barcelona at just 18 years old.

Starting in the sport at such a young age, Verstappen quickly developed a reputation of being hot-headed and impulsive to a fault. As he gained experience, he has harnessed his formerly unbridled passion, maturing into one of the most respected, and most feared drivers on the grid.

For the past two years, the Dutchman has finished third in the driver’s championship behind Mercedes-AMG Petronas F1 drivers Valtteri Bottas and seven-time world champion Lewis Hamilton. With victory closer than it has ever been in his seven seasons in Formula 1, there is only one word that can be used to describe Max Verstappen: hungry.

Michael Schumacher. Hamilton has held steady momentum regarding his world titles, winning his first in 2008, and his other six consecutively from 2014 to 2020, save 2016, where he lost out to his teammate and “best friend turned bitter rival,” Nico Rosberg, by just five points. Another World title in 2021 would mean he would be the sole record holder for Most World Championships won.

“It is an objective fact that the Mercedes driver is one of the best, if not the best, Formula 1 driver of his generation.”

Lewis Hamilton is no stranger to being a trailblazer or record breaker. As well as being the first and only Black F1 driver, the 36-year-old Brit is also the most heavily decorated—some of his standout achievements being: Most Pole Positions (101), Most Career Wins (101), Most Podium Finishes (179), and Most World Championships (7), a record he holds jointly with living legend Michael Schumacher. Hamilton debuted in 2007 and immediately proved that he deserved his seat in the pinnacle of Autosport. His records for most wins, most pole positions, and most consecutive podium finishes in a debut season have yet to be broken. It is an objective fact that the Mercedes driver is one of the best, if not the best, Formula 1 driver of his generation.

Although both drivers are well-deserving of the title, many people are hesitant towards championing Hamilton for the win out of the sole desire to keep Michael Schumacher’s name in the record books. A year after his retirement in 2012, Schumacher suffered a traumatic brain injury while skiing and was put into a medically induced coma.

Although not much is known about his current condition, as this information is closely guarded by his family, it is known that, as of 2014, the racing legend could not speak, was paralyzed and in a wheelchair. As he is engaging in ongoing rehabilitation, his wife has stated that they have seen improvements. This accident sent waves across the racing community, with many grieving the loss of such an iconic name in motorsport and hoping to keep him and his achievements immortalized for generations to come. Hamilton has already equaled and surpassed one of the German’s records, being presented with one of Schumacher’s quintessential red helmets upon doing so.

Outside of racing, the Billion Dollar Man is also well known for his involvement in fashion, music, and activism, being named one of the 100 most influential people by Time in 2020. As well, Sir Lewis Hamilton was awarded knighthood in the 2021 UK New Year Honours list, a long-standing Commonwealth tradition, for which he was appointed following achieving his seventh world title, equalling

Three Grands Prix remain to decide who will take home the 2021 world title and there will most certainly be controversy among Formula 1 fans about who should win until the end. It is said that “uneasy is the head that wears a crown,” but rest assured, whoever it is, history will be made, and the head that ends up wearing the crown will not bear it lightly.

BODY IMAGE IN SPORTS: A SPECTRUM OF SELF-ESTEEM SOPHIE HOLLAND Content warning: eating disorders Athletes’ bodies are their instruments. Almost everything they do in their careers relates to the body. With such expectations, society places a ridiculous amount of pressure on athletes to look and move a certain way, and because of this, many sports have evolved into a culture of promoting unhealthy body image for the purpose of winning. This can lead to severe body image and self-esteem issues, including eating disorders.

These problems can even begin at a young age, and since body dysmorphia is already so prevalent with young people, the expectations that their bodies look a certain way for certain sports amplify these self-esteem issues even more. According to Global Sport Matters, British sprinter and Olympic gold medalist Anyika Onuora––who is very physically fit ––has spoken out about covering her body with baggy clothes due to body image insecurities. Onoura explains that these issues stem from being bullied about her appearance at a young age. This just goes to show that even people with bodies that the general public would consider ideal struggle with body image issues.

Eating disorders specifically are very common among athletes. According to the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA), “the pressure to win and an emphasis on body weight and shape can create a very toxic environment.” Based on a study from NEDA among a group of NCAA (National Collegiate Athletes Association) athletes, over a third of female athletes reported behaviours, mindsets, and symptoms that put them at risk of anorexia nervosa.

What many do not think of, however, is that eating disorders among athletes is a broad spectrum. Stereotypically, people assume that eating disorders only impact women, especially in sports like gymnastics, volleyball, dance, and others which pressure athletes to appear slim. While it is important to note that women are disproportionately at risk of eating disorders, the generalization that it is only women who suffer from eating disorders could not be further from the truth.

“Ultimately, it is important to be mindful of the pressure we place on athletes when it comes to body image.”

According to Run Fast. Eat Slow., 25 percent of individuals with anorexia, and 40 percent of individuals with a binge-eating disorder are male. Men are also at risk of eating disorders, especially when it comes to sports such as football or rugby. This is not to say that women cannot do football or rugby, or that men cannot do dance or gymnastics; it is simply a demonstration that both of these demographics are impacted by the risk of eating disorders, but in different ways. NEDA explains, “[T]hough most athletes with eating disorders are female, male athletes are also at risk—espe-

cially those competing in sports that tend to place an emphasis on the athlete’s diet, appearance, size, and weight requirements, such as wrestling, bodybuilding, rowing, and running.”

Rugby props may need to weigh as much as 275 pounds, depending on their league and other factors.

According to MVOrganizing, an average NFL lineman is expected to be 6 feet 5 inches and weigh 312 pounds. Starting as early as high school, linemen need to bench up to 320 pounds on a regular basis, and elite rugby players need to lift up to 1.5 times their body weight. These statistics reflect the immense pressure placed on athletes, and also show that there are just as many athletes expected to bulk up as there are athletes expected to slim down.

Ultimately, it is important to be mindful of the pressure we place on athletes when it comes to body image. Of course, sports can be a healthy, active environment for athletes to thrive both physically and socially. However, we need to take into consideration how certain body image ideals, diet, or appearance expectations can affect elite athletes. No matter the age of an athlete, they can still feel the pressure to look, eat, and move a certain way when going down an elite development path. Since athletes rely on their bodies for just about everything, it is important to promote healthy bodies–– physically and mentally.

CTE: THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE’S CHRONIC PROBLEM SAMUEL WEGERT

One of the more profound topics in sports today is the issue of chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE).

Found primarily in contact sports like the NFL, its underlying cause stems from the continued promotion of these sports without informed consent in youth participation. According to Dr. Bennet Omalu, a forensic pathologist, CTE is a neurodegenerative disease that causes nerve cells in the brain and parts of the nervous system to die over time. It is not curable, and it is believed that repetitive blows to the head (that cause mild to severe brain trauma) cause CTE. Symptoms of CTE include loss of memory, confusion and flawed judgment, changes in mood, personality, and behavior such as depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and actions, and aggression. These symptoms often show up years after someone has been playing contact sports.

The prevalence of the disease is still difficult to understand, but it has been a major topic of discussion for the NFL over the last few years.

A research study conducted by Boston University in 2017 found 110 out of 111 former NFL players to have CTE. Although this represents a significant percentage, the results may be skewed as the brains were donated from players’ families who showed signs of CTE. This is because families are more likely to donate the brain to research when they are aware of symptoms such as the early onset of Alzheimer’s, memory loss, suicidal ideation, or other forms of brain damage. One of the main problems surrounding the discussion of CTE is that it can only be diagnosed post-mortem, making it more difficult to study the causes and prevalence of CTE. Even though there are many contact sports out there that may cause CTE, by far the most researched sport is American football and the NFL. The NFL at first disputed this link between brain damage and football but has now made efforts to finance research and attempt to “improve” the safety of the violent game. Pouring $40 million into medical research as well as hiring a neurologist and sports doctor as their chief medical officer in 2017. The NFL has changed rules in the game to end dangerous tactics in order to reduce the number of injuries; additionally, they have new guidelines, medical support, technology to identify/treat concussions and other injuries along with mandatory health and safety education for players and medical personnel.

These strides in safety are commendable, but what about youth football? What about the sport itself? Is it morally right for parents to let their children play football without them knowing the consequences they may experience later in life? The number of children over the age of six years old playing football has decreased by 60 percent since 2006, due to related concerns such as CTE, and should ideally decrease even more. Researchers at Boston University CTE center have found that for every year that an individual plays football, the risk of getting CTE goes up by 30 percent. Meaning, for every 2.6 years of play, the risk doubles. For football players who begin in high school, this means their risk of developing CTE is a staggering 240 percent by the time they graduate college, and most youths begin football at an even earlier age.

“These strides in safety are commendable, but what about youth football? What about the sport itself? Is it morally right for parents to let their children play football without them knowing the consequences they may experience later in life?”

It is possible for CTE to be detectable in youth and even widespread throughout the brain (when analyzing youth suicides). Researchers from the Concussion Legacy Foundation state that they are getting closer to being able to diagnose CTE in living people, which may bring the NFL a whole onslaught of problems. If

CTE can be detected in youth, high school, and college athletes, what will happen to the NFL’s pipeline of players?

More importantly, the NFL’s financial prospects will be in jeopardy. This outlines the dilemma of CTE in the NFL. The NFL, a multi-billion-dollar sports league, generates annual revenue of $12.2 billion (2020). Furthermore, there are approximately 400 million fans around the world who enjoy watching football. Does this mean the health and safety of athletes should be knowingly put at risk? At the professional and collegiate level athletes may be compensated by high salaries, and free education respectively, but what about youth and high-school-age athletes? The decisions to play or not to play are crucial choices that youth may not be able to make themselves as the consequences of such decisions are not an imminent or an obvious threat to them.

If scientists are able to finally diagnose CTE in the living, would the whole structure of football change?

Would youth football stop? Would contact begin at an age of 16? (Many organizations start tackle football as early as 5 years old).

Right now, the NFL is not forced into making any major decisions about CTE since the data is still skewed and scientists and researchers cannot detect CTE in the living. The NFL has made some attempts at improving the equipment as well as altering the rules of the game to make it slightly safer. This does not change the fact that there are repeated mild brain traumas occurring multiple times a game in players and does little to reduce the risk of CTE. As the research progresses, there will come a time where more parents will need to make decisions for their children, and there eventually may come a time where the NFL will suffer from a lack of quality players, as well as many players who end up choosing to retire earlier than normal in their career.

In terms of the larger sporting world, who should be in charge of making decisions around the issue of CTE and other brain damage in contact sports overall? CTE is prevalent in other “lower” contact sports as well, meaning a breakthrough in CTE research can affect many of the world’s sports and culture around sports.

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TWUE LOVE HANNAH GALLANDT

THE HOLI DAY EBENEZER SCROOGE

Holidays: Who needs them! They use up valuable business time for money-making and stuff! Hi, my name is Ebenezer Scrooge, and I have an idea that will revolutionize business and money-making for all time and forever.

It’s called: The Holi Day. That’s right. Just one day of the year when you celebrate all of the holidays at once. That way, you only have to take one day off each year. Here’s what I’m thinking: 1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

My friend signed me up for TWU Match this past week... I don’t know what I was expecting. A part of me was looking for my ring by spring; a host of angels singing from above pointing me to my true love with a clear spotlight.

I thought, “maybe this will finally be how I will get out there! No disgusting, vulgar comments. A truly pure way to find a good match. “Cause as a Christian community, we are the best out there, the real corn of the cream. Everyone is so Godly and would never take advantage of this or each other, right?!” While another part of me thought it would be a great joke.

But after being featured on it for the past few weeks, I’ve come to realize something very important. My worth is in a significant other and I am so glad I was

signed up for this Christian dating Instagram page. I trust the process with every fiber of my physical being.

It is definitely the way to find the one: my other half.

Having someone choreograph the perfect conversation will be the definite conclusion to a 20-year dry spell. I wouldn’t say that I am desperate, just ready. I am fully confident that someone will eventually, hopefully, probably, most likely, kind of sort of like me. Maybe. And I know that when that happens it will be a sign from God that this person is the one. No matter the fact that both of us are desperate for love and terribly lonely, hoping to find some kind of connection in this strong, Christ-centred community on a student-run Instagram page. We will work it out. Even if I haven’t gotten any matches yet.

Whenever a child loses a tooth, they put it under their pillow and the Tooth Fairy collects it as per usual.

Then, the Tooth Fairy passes all the teeth on to the Easter Bunny, who comes on Holi Day and hides the teeth around the house.

On Holi Day morning, the children wake up, get into their spooky costumes, and run around the house looking for teeth.

Next, the children cash in each tooth with their parents in exchange for presents that Santa has provided.

Afterwards, the whole family has one giant meal where they say what they’re thankful for, rest from labour, and remember those who died for their country.

Finally, they all get super drunk, and that covers about all the major holidays any corporation cares about.

Oh yeah, they can also celebrate every single person on Earth’s birth and death, including Jesus’s, and all of the countries and stuff, so that covers birthdays, funerals, independence days, and any religious aspects of holidays.

So, there you go. Here’s a perfect way to wrap all of the holidays into one so that people can make more money and have one really awesome day to look forward to each year. Now, let’s get this puppy rolling. Please contact me at eben.ezer@hotmail.com if you know how to patent a day of the year. I’m thinking anytime someone says “Holi Day” I get five bucks. Who’s with me?

ZACHARY SIMONYI-GINDELE

JOSH DRIEDIGER

FUNNY PERSON SPOTLIGHT

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What is your year, major, and hometown?

My name’s Joshua Driediger, I’m a first year Psych major from Abbotsford, B.C.

When did you first know you were funny?

I thought this was an article for me being a Spartan?

I’m not a very funny guy. I first knew I was a good athlete when I scored my first three-pointer at age seven.

Since then, I’ve been amazing at making everyone insecure about their athletic skills.

What or who is your greatest inspiration for humour?

Huge Amy Schumer fan. That time she just laid on the ground in front of Jerry Seinfeld was so funny!

Is there ever a time where you doubted you were funny?

No. What is your greatest pet peeve as a funny person?

When people don’t laugh at my very funny jokes. I have never made an unfunny joke. I am the funniest

man alive. There is an article about me being funny in Mars’ Hill. There is nowhere else to go except down.

I am in my peak humorous state and you cannot take this away from me. Laugh when I speak, peasants.

How do you think being funny will impact your career?

Well, as the inventor of “Stand-Up Comedy Therapy” (the act of helping my patients make their trauma into a stand-up set), I think being funny can help my patients improve their jokes. Don’t really plan on helping with their mental problems though. I’m too busy being funny and depressed to fix their issues!

If you could trade being funny for one trait, what would it be?

I’d become ugly. It’s so hard being the hot AND funny friend all the time!!!! I’m constantly stressed because everyone expects me to be hot and funny, but I’ll deal with it. Even though I’m drowning in response to my TWU Match profile, if anyone wants to be hot and funny with me, they can call me at 604-866-0436.

CHRISTMAS: A CONUNDRUM NYSSA MORGAN & BRAEDON GROVER SUNNES

December is a month highly anticipated by some, and completely dreaded by others. If you’re on the fence about the holidays, luckily for you, Mars’ Hill has two Christmas experts who are ready to break down the pros and cons of the season. Braedon is a passionate lover of the holidays and eagerly shares his gaiety and childlike wonder with those who have long sworn off celebrating Christmas.

Providing the cons, Nyssa takes her years of experience hating everything about the holiday season to shed light on the reality that Christmas is not all that it is cracked up to be.

Pros

Cons

The magic of Christmas and the joy that fills the air!

The only real magic in December is that the semester ends. Any joy you feel is just the relief of not receiving Moodle alerts that your final paper was due yesterday.

Waiting up for Santa!

Santa is not real and if he was, he would be a huge creep.

Snow! And snow days!

Either you will have fun dislocating your spinal discs while shoveling or climate change will make sure there is no snow at all.

Getting presents! And giving presents!

‘Tis the season for capitalism to thrive. Let’s all keep supporting the top 1 percenters this holiday season!

Kissing under the mistletoe!

There’s a pandemic—keep your mouths to yourselves.

Carolers! Christmas music playing in stores!

Singing with each other!

Doctors agree that listening to “Santa Baby” more than once causes irreparable brain cell loss.

The lights and decorations that make home all the more homey!

The electricity bill is always insanely high. Also, the giant blowup Santa in your yard really is ugly and someone should have stopped you from buying that.

Families go to church together, even if they don’t go normally!

People still go to church?

All of the holiday dinners! The holiday treats!

None of your pants fit anymore. Also, fruitcake.

You get to see family!

Enjoy arguing with your uncle about politics over Christmas dinner.

Everyone is so happy and excited for Christmas!

Loving Christmas is not a personality trait. Try finding a less annoying hobby like watching paint dry.

Jesus!

No offence, but Mariah Carey has this holiday down on lock, so Jesus could have like March 9 or something?

DEAR MORAL KOALA...

Declassified Entry: Moral Koala is the devil.

Dear Devilphiliac Declassified,

HOT CHOCOLATE: THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING CHRISTA LYFORD

A wise man once said, “It’s about drive, it’s about power / we stay hungry, we devour.” That man was Socrates. He invented gravity—and also the moon—but the crowning achievement in the impressive resume that he would pass around at dinner parties was this: The Invention of Hot Chocolate.

A rallying cry honouring the sacred beverage was ingrained in the cultural consciousness by the landmark film, The Polar Express (2004), wherein a computer-generated Tom Hanks prances down the aisles of an equally computer-generated train car singing, “Hot! Hot! Oh we got it! Hot! Hot! Hey we got it! Hot! Hot! Say we got it! Hot chocolate!” Hot chocolate was previously unheard of, undiscovered, by the common man until this moment. CGI Tom

Hanks created life as we know it. Hot chocolate––once afforded only to warriors and scientists––was now available to all.

Do you have your own questions for Moral Koala? Submit them in the declassifieds!

A true testament to how far we have come as a species can be seen by walking down the aisles of your local grocery store and seeing hot cocoa powder available for purchase. It marks the most sophisticated times that humanity has yet seen. But despite the bounds in achievement that we have reached, we must not let this progress delay us from reaching peak enlightenment. We must push for hot chocolate to be labeled a life necessity. It should be free for all who desire it.

Only one establishment in the entire northern hemisphere sees a true future for us: The TWUSA Lounge.

If you have access to this holy grail of exactly two couches and free coffee, you must be prepared to meet God in powder form. It is usually in a small, hollow glass orb (for a glorious day, it was presented in a cylindrical jar that echoed its true beauteous nature). Hot water is provided to complete the drink. But we all know it is not necessary. Next time you are in the presence of the Hot Chocolate Orb, indulge in the primordial instinct that sings through your veins every moment you lay eyes on it.

Stay hungry. Scoop that powder directly into your mouth. Devour.

Swallow Heaven. Choke on its dust. Become all you were meant to be.

THE POP CULT PLAYLIST

“It was solely responsible for the downfall of the Roman empire.”

With equivocal virtue, Moral Koala

Consider this your Discover (Bi)Weekly from the Mars’ Hill Exec team.

This beverage would change the shape of history, the nature of the world, and the trajectory of humanity. It was solely responsible for the downfall of the Roman Empire. It was used by NASA to power space rockets. It was incorporated into Project MK Ultra, and the results were so dangerous that the records were permanently destroyed by the U.S. Government.

For as it is written: “The devil… He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding the truth for there is no truth to him.

When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” Though I am not one so rash as to make quick and harsh assumptions or generalizations, I find it hard to ignore a direct sign from God when given one. When I read your submission at exactly 8:44 p.m. while sitting next to my friend John, I knew exactly what was being told of me. I’ll refrain from calling you the devil, anonymous writer, but I will dare say you’re a liar.

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