WOMEN AND AGE –

WHY ARE WE TRAPPED BY OUR NUMBER?

Ibegan to consider this topic after I spoke to four female clients in one day, all in different decades of life. I found it fascinating that it didn’t matter how young or old the woman was; each shared anxiety about her age. The women’s ages were 26, 37, 44, and 52. At some point during our conversation, every single one of these women referred to “getting older” or “not getting any younger.” “They’d better get on with it.”

Each woman was putting enormous pressure on herself to make decisions she wasn’t ready to make simply because of her number. Measuring her decisions by external stimulus. Each was viewing herself as having a limited amount of time to get happy, find love, or reach her goals. Ultimately they were all feeling bad about themselves.

Below are three thoughts to consider to help re-shape our perspective on aging

Embrace Each Cycle for What it is! Consider first the big picture. We are born. We leave a womb confined in a mother’s body. We can do nothing for ourselves. As we age, we gain independence and mastery over our choices and our body. We feel powerful. As we mature, we acquire wisdom and patience, and perspective.

As we become elderly, our bodies weaken.

Yet we become keepers of the truth and learn to value moments over accomplishments. Then we transition to pure essence energy where we came from. We integrate the experience of living that human lifetime. When we feel ready, many of us will do it all over again in a new human experience. When we know that death is simply a marker on the continuum of eternal life, we can relax and enjoy the ride.

Cindy Joseph tells a story about the courage she found to stop coloring her hair and let it turn grey. She was very nervous about doing it. She thought about it long and hard. Almost immediately after she let her hair go grey, she was scouted on the street by a modeling agency for a worldwide fashion campaign. They wanted her silver hair. Had she not changed her hair, she would not have received that offer.

We want to stop looking at changes that are natural for our lives as a problem or a loss. Perhaps current culture cultivates these biases. All the more reason not to participate. It’s damaging and perpetuates false ideas about who we are.

We should rather appreciate the new opportunities and state of being that await us. They are equally as delicious as the cycles we are leaving, if not more so. There is meaning and value in each cycle.

Bias Exists - Surround Yourself with People Whose Eyes Light Up When They See You Coming

We all will encounter bias, judgment, discrimination, and prejudice. It’s inevitable as human beings at different points of spiritual awakening.

Each of us has the power to choose which consciousness we want to align with. A limited consciousness or an abundant consciousness. Surround yourself with like-minded souls who mirror back the nature of your true essence as you navigate the human experience.

Make that a priority rather than seeking approval from those who have limited awareness or trying to maintain yourself to external standards.

There is No Such Thing as Time

When you speak to people who are eighty and older, they will often remark that they still feel the same inside as they did when they were 21.

This is because the soul is timeless.

The human experience does not change our inner age or inner state of being. We can grow in wisdom and compassion but not in the inner age. We are timeless. We came to the human experience to experience ourselves in form. The form is finite. We are not.

Often when I am working with people in a coaching role, they want timelines to hold themselves accountable.

They want to get somewhere fast. In truth, slowly is the fastest way to get where we want to be. All of us inch along until we shift. Change rarely comes fast. Change is much more complex than what an emotional intelligence wants to believe.

Rather than timelines, what is more useful, is to pay close and careful attention to how we feel and strive for inner balance. Once balanced, take action.

When we allow that awareness to guide our choices, we will always feel vital and young, and life will feel more effortless.

This is why most enlightened masters refer to the concept of the Eternal Now. No matter what time it is- past, present, or future, it is always NOW. There is no other time than now. The body tells a different story. For the inner being, everything is happening in the moment we are in.

We should enjoy our humanness – the good, the bad, and the ugly, but not allow it to define us. Refuse false identifications. You are not your number. You will always be timeless, beautiful, resilient, and valuable to the whole, even when others can’t see it. Others don’t have to see it or validate it for it to be true. We only have to see it for ourselves. Refuse to align with limitation as something meaningful. Celebrate your numbers- all of them. Live your life as the infinite, loving timeless being that you are.

Known as the Common Sense Psychic (tm), Phyllis King has worked with tens of thousands of peoplein 25 countries. She is known for her practical and down to earth approach. She has been featured on, ABC, CBS and NBC TV, radio programs across the country, and has been published in over 70 print and online publications. She has four books, including Bouncing Back, Thriving in Changing Times, with Dr. Wayne Dyer. Her latest book The Energy of Abundance is available in bookstores now. Phyllis holds a B.A. in Sociology. www.phyllisking.com

By Heidi Connolly