Massive Magazine Albany Issue 09 2017

Issue 09

2017

Albany

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MILLENNIALS

• New Zealand’s mental health system has failed millennials •

• The pros and cons of being a millennial • ASA Execs set for huge pay rise •

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PRESS COUNCIL Massive Magazine is registered under the New Zealand Press Council which allows you as our reader to reach out to an independent forum for resolving complaints you may have.

DISCLAIMER The views, beliefs and opinions reflected in the pages of Massive Magazine do not necessarily represent those of Massey University, its staff, Albany Students’ Association (ASA), Massey University Students’ Association (MUSA), Massey at Wellington Students’ Association (MAWSA), Extramural Students’ Society, or the Massive editor. MAWSA is an independent organisation that publishes Massive. Send any queries or complaints directly to Massive at editor@massivemagazine.org.nz.

Massive is subject to the New Zealand Press Council. If a complainant is not satisfied with the response from Massive, the complaint may be referred to the Press Council: info@presscouncil.org.nz or online via presscouncil.org.nz

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ENROL BY 23 AUGUST AND MAKE VOTING EASY. elections.org.nz 0800 36 76 56

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Editorial Hi everyone, This is the last issue of Massive before mid-semester break. Time sure does fly and we now only have three magazines left for the year.

In the last couple of weeks the Albany Students’ Association has come under fire for a decision to increase executive’s pay by $26,000. You can read more about that in the news section of this edition of the magazine.

In what is widely considered to be a job that is more about help and volunteering time than making money, some might argue this increase isn’t warranted.

Especially when budgets are tight and money may have to come from other services, such as clubs and advocacy, to fund the shortfall.

When speaking to sources for our story, it was mentioned that students were aware of what was going on because around 80 had shown up for the meeting when the decision was made.

Unfortuately 80 students isn’t even close to the majority of all students at the Albany campus.

I would take a stab in the dark and say many students wouldn’t agree with this pay increase. The problem though? They don’t care. They don’t care enough to attend meetings or have their say.

Now is a good time to start thinking about this, as student elections are coming up at all three campuses later this month.

Anyone is welcome to have someone nominate them and run for a spot on the executive.

Even if you don’t want to run and you think student politics are pointless, try engage more closely in what’s happening. Hell, why not even vote.

These people do have the power to dramatically change student life on campus.

If that’s not a good enough reason to vote I don’t know what is.

Nikki

Contents | 5

Features 10 Are Millennials really the ‘Me’ generation?

News 06 Local News 09 World and National News

13 The pros and cons of being a millenial

Regulars

20 Era by era

04 Editorial

28 Places to eat avocado

40 Culture with Paul Berrington

29 Shitty student flats

42 Booked In / Bitchin’ Kitchen

30 I feel like I’ve seen this movie before

44 Puzzles

Opinion 17 A Pinch of Politics 26 How New Zealand’s mental health system has failed millennials 34 The Yarns from Pitch Five

46 Events

Interviews 18 Interview: Hazel Osbourne 22 Massey’s own queen of DIY: An interview with Yanita McLeay

35 Mum’s the Word

Humour 30 Modern Miss Lonelyhearts 36 The Dilemma Doctor

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Local News

ASA Execs vote themselves huge pay rise

By Nikki Papatsoumas The Albany Students’ Association Executive are increasing their pay by $26,000.

Late last month, ASA held its Annual General Meeting (AGM).

As part of the heated meeting, which was attended by roughly 80 students, changes were made to ASA’s constitution.

As it stands each ASA Executive receives an honoraria – which is paid in lieu of wages and in recognition for work – as opposed to an hourly wage.

This is funded through the student services levy as part of of the association’s service level agreement contract with the university.

At the AGM, changes were made to the constitution which will see the total cost of ASA executive’s honorariums go from $28,000 a year to $54,000 – a $26,000 increase.

Before changes were made to the constitution, ASA’s President Lance Walsh received an honorarium of up to $10,000 a year. This has now increased to $17,000.

The executive say they will be using funding provided via the association’s service level agreement to cover the increase, but this is yet to be secured from the university.

If they can’t secure the money the association’s budget will have to be re-arranged and funding could be taken from cash reserves and when they run out, from core services such as clubs and societies or advocacy.

Walsh stands by the controversial decision, despite facing mixed feedback at the meeting.

“I think the executive need to be properly funded and have an incentive for helping other students. I think the executive’s decision to put $26,000 towards exec honorarium will be beneficial.

“My statement in the AGM still stands, I would do this without the money, but I would not put as much effort as I have.”

PhD Student Mike Horrell says he is highly concerned that the executive have made changes to ASA’s constitution before money has been obtained from the university as part of service level agreement bids which are currently taking place.

“When they don’t obtain more funding specifically for wages next year there’s only one place the shortfall can come from, out of the services that ASA provide to all students,” he says.

“It’s a case of taking from the many to give to the few. The whole process has been completely dishonest.”

Horrell says some pay needs to be involved to attract people to the position, but doesn’t believe an increase is warranted.

“The ASA is a student union, it’s a non-profit organisation that is supposed to be students working for the betterment of students, not a corporation that can be exploited by those at the top.

“The reward of helping others and gaining experience should be why students join the executive. The pay-out at the end shouldn’t be expected and certainty not guaranteed.”

ASA’s Office Manager Jacqueline Adams says being on the executive has never been a job.

“The focus of the governance committee should be on improving student educational outcomes and experiences whilst studying,” she says.

“Whilst serving on the executive, students are able to gain wideranging skills including exposure to high-level management of the university.”

She says she has concerns around the budget, especially if the university does not agree to fund the increase.

“If the President is unable to negotiate the required increase in our contract with the university to cover the increase in the honoraria, the balance will need to come from cash reserves, which would be unsustainable,” she says.

ASA Advocate Penny Lyall says if the university does not grant money to the association, she is concerned about where it will come from.

“I would be concerned if any money were to be directed from the services and activities that the Advocacy Service currently provides.

“Advocacy is an essential and necessary support and safeguard to our students and as such I see it as a primary and critical function that the ASA performs.”

Do you think ASA Executive deserve a pay rise? Did you know the executive position was paid? Send an email to editor@ mawsa.org.nz

Local News | 7

United Future set to abolish student allowances

Go Innovate! Underway in Auckland

Students involved in Go Innovate!

By Taryn Dryfhout Peter Dunne of United Futures.

By Taryn Dryfhout United Future has announced its plans to do away with student allowances, if it is part of the next government.

The eradication of student allowances is a consequence of the party’s broader plan to overhaul tertiary education.

Cutting off access to student allowances will provide the funding needed to offer tuition-free education to students, and will be phased in over a number of years.

The New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations (NZUSA) President Jonathan Gee is warning that any plan to abolish Student Allowances would deepen inequality.

“We welcome policies which aim to improve access to tertiary education for all, such as the removal of tuition fees, but taking away living allowances from low-income New Zealanders is not the answer,’” he says.

Under the proposed policy, students will still have access to student loan living costs.

Gee says while students immediate concern is having enough to live on, their long-term concern is graduating with less debt.

“We also know that many low-income families are extremely averse to debt. An indebted future is unlikely to encourage some of our poorest families into tertiary study,” he says.

“Free tertiary education and a living allowance for low-income New Zealanders who are studying should not be a trade-off.”

Albany Students’ Association (ASA) President Lance Walsh agrees that it may not be the answer.

“My judgement really depends on how much the living cost allowance will increase by.

“I agree with Johnathan in that it would deepen inequality. However, I do believe in an increase in the living cost allowance. I don’t think removing student allowance and putting it elsewhere would achieve much,” says Walsh.

Massey’s annual innovative ideas competition is in full swing in Auckland, with workshops taking place throughout this month, in preparation for the final in September.

Go Innovate! is a Dragon’s Den-style competition run by the Massey University Student Enterprise club (MUSE).

Participants develop an innovative idea, which they submit for entry to the finals event, which will take place on September 27.

Finalists pitch their idea to a panel of experienced judges comprised of industry leaders, university professors, and student leaders.

Prizes are given for first and second place finalists, as well as ‘people’s choice’. Finalists compete for prizes which include access to seed funding, and entrepreneurial resources such as the ecentre’s ‘sprint business development’ programme.

The competition is open to all Massey students, who can enter as individuals or as teams, says faculty coordinator Rebecca Gill.

“All students are encouraged to participate in the competition. We believe that innovation is an activity that involves solving problems and that it takes a diversity of skill sets to accomplish this.”

As part of the competition, entrants are provided with training, mentoring and support through a series of workshops throughout August, in the lead up to the finals event. The workshops cover everything in the innovation process from the generation of ideas, to the development of a prototype and business model as well as pitch training and practice.

Go to goinnovate.co.nz for more information.

homegrown 8 | giveaway me to do 3 double

Massive is the student magazine for all Massey University students. This year we need even more student contributors to fill our pages.

If you would like to contribute in any form, please do get in touch. We’re keen as. editor@mawsa.org.nz massive@mawsa.org.nz

National News | 9

By Nikki Papatsoumas

Jacinda Ardern has been announced as the new leader of the Labour Party.

The announcement, which was made at the beginning of August, came after Andrew Little confirmed he would be standing down.

Little made the decision to stand down after polls revealed a steep drop in support for the Labour Party, and announced he would be endorsing Ardern, his deputy, as his successor.

Speaking at the time of his resignation, Little said while it was a sad decision, he had been privileged to lead a united team of Labour MPs. “I’m proud to have been leader of the Labour Party, and have given this position my absolute and unwavering dedication, just as I have done so for more than 25 years in the Labour movement.

“New Zealand needs a Labour-led Government, and in order to achieve this Labour must fight without questions over its leadership.”

Ardern says her team were ready to run the campaign of their lives and says they will be positive, organised and ready.

“I am privileged and honoured to be Leader of the Labour Party.

“I am looking forward to the challenge of the election campaign where I will get the opportunity to talk to New Zealanders about Labour’s plan for a better and fairer New Zealand.

“This is what Labour has always stood for and under my leadership, will continue to stand for and fight for.

But will a change in leadership make a change in the polls?

Third year Health Science, Sport and Exercise student Stephanie Korad says she thinks it could.

“She is young and engaging, and better than Andrew Little. She can relate more to people I reckon. It’s fucking ridiculous having a white male leader for the past 12 years.

“Having a Prime Minister at her age is a breath of fresh air, it will bring something different. I would love to see what policy she comes up with that will promote a better New Zealand.”

Korad says she thinks it could potentially encourage more people to vote.

“She will get on platforms that will appeal to younger audiences, she is on Instagram and Twitter.”

Pocket’s Picks: From around the Globe

Peanut butter used to help prisoners escape A dozen prisoners in America have escaped from jail using peanut butter. According to reports, inmates used the popular spread to make the number of a door leading outside look like the number of an internal cell door. They managed to escape by asking a guard to unlock the door and he did thinking he was leading them into their cell. Eleven of the 12 prisoners have since been caught.

Marmite and Vegemite can cure stress and anxiety New research from the University of Victoria in Australia has found vitamin B in spreads like Marmite and Vegemite can help to tackle stress and anxiety. It found people who ate the spreads were less likely to suffer from stress and anxiety as a lack of vitamin B can cause depression. More than 500 people from Australia, New Zealand and the UK took part in the research.

Let’s get Quizzical 1. Who was announced as the new leader of the Labour Party earlier this month?

2. Outside which New York building was John Lennon killed?

3. What character does Morgan Freeman play in Bruce Almighty?

4. How many of Snow White’s seven dwarfs had a name ending in Y? 5. What two parts of the human body continue to grow your entire life?

6. What planet has the most moons?

7. What type of food is yam?

8. What was John F. Kennedy’s middle name?

9. What colour is the tongue of a giraffe?

10. What was Luftwaffe?

1. Jacinda Ardern 2. The Dakota Building 3.

God 4. Dopey, Grumpy, Sleepy, Sneezy and Happy 5. Nose and ears 6. Saturn 7. A sweet potato 8. Fitzgerald 9. Blue 10. The German Airforce

Ardern new leader of the Labour Party

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twee

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Tweet of the Week

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Feature | 11

Are millennials really the ‘me’ generation?

By Adam Pearse What word comes to mind when you hear ‘millennial’? Lazy, Selfish, Entitled? I wouldn’t blame you because these are some of the terms that embody the millennial generation for most of the population. They are themes that are constantly echoed by media organisations around the globe. In 2013, the USA’s ‘Time’ Magazine famously plastered ‘The ME ME ME Generation’ onto their front page, describing how the newest generation was only in it for themselves and had no respect for their elders.

phenomenon. Originating in the late 19th Century, those born from 1880 until 1900 were the ‘lost generation’. Those from 19001920, the ‘greatest generation’, 1920-1940 the ‘silent generation, 1940-1960 the ‘baby boomers’, 1960-1980 ‘generation X’ and finally the millennials, those people that reached the age of 21 after the millennium.

What I’m here to tell you is that these millennials don’t exist.

Now, before I lose any respect I had from my older readers, let me be clear that people like this do exist. There are people in this world that only care about themselves and have no thought for those whom they hurt. However, these are not traits confined to one generation and the whole concept of generational thinking is regressive at best. So why were millennials branded with these degrading attributes to begin with?

“All a generation is, is a stereotype. Not all stereotypes are bad. If the stereotype is good like that the new generation, the millennials are not lazy they are independent, they’ve got a much better feeling of balance than we do, this is all good stuff. That’s more a reflection of someone’s age rather than their generational group.”

To answer this question, I had to hear it directly from the horse’s mouth – a baby boomer. That’s right, a member of a generation, born between 1940 and 1960, that tanked the economy, decimated the environment and made buying a house as unattainable as having completely dry washing in a Palmerston North winter.

Luckily for me, this one had a doctorate in philosophy. Introducing Associate Professor Paul Toulson, a man that has studied human behaviour for decades and has a considerable interest in what makes a generation tick.

Toulson sees that generational thinking as a whole is problematic and that when we attribute values to a group of people, we mix the use of generations instead of age.

“The problem with the generational model, it is a gross abstraction of reality. It’s not actually real and it’s not much use from that point of view. You can say that if you have an old person that their wants and needs as far as work is concerned are quite different from somebody just starting but that’s an age thing, not a generational thing,” he says.

Generational terms such as millennials are a fairly recent

Toulson rejects the notion that these generations are able to say anything about a person and that all they are, are stereotypes.

When posed the question of whether millennials are lazy and selfish, Toulson responded in a manner that suited his title as an esteemed professor.

“I think that is absolute bullshit.

“They are not lazy or selfish. They are no more lazy and selfish than people of my age when we were that age. There is a big idea being promulgated that millennials are very narcissistic. That is absolute crap. Absolute crap. They are no more narcissistic than some of the young people I knew.”

Toulson believes the generation you were born in tells you very little about the person you are and can only allude to the kind of world you grew up in.

“If you knew what generation they belong to, you would actually know what the state of the world was at the time. So, you know that millennials were born into a world of computers, they grew up with them whereas with a baby boomer, we didn’t have computers.

Computers were a feature of science fiction. We didn’t even have space travel,” he says.

“A lot of science fiction is becoming reality now but it was very much fiction then. So, that’s about the only thing that you can say is that if they’re a millennial, you immediately put them in a

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millennial box as far as when they came into the world and what the conditions were like. Of course, each age or each generation has its own features.”

Toulson sees millennials today as contradicting their narcissistic and selfish brand in that they portray a moral code more virtuous than the one held by generations before them and it is only through the media that this brand persists.

“Young people now, have a much better value system than we had when I was young. I can remember when I was in my 20’s and all we thought about was chasing girls and having a good time. Now, I’m noticing that with a lot of young people, they have a much stronger moral structure than we had and they focus on other things rather than food, booze and sex which were the gods of those days.

“You’ve still got a bit of that that goes around and of course the press seizes on this and blows it all up. The media seizes on often half-truths but never the full truth because the media tends to seize on what is sensational, what will sell.”

He says millennials face challenges that previous generations have never had to face particularly in relation to the advancements in technology where young people are more vulnerable to the horrors of the world.

“I think it’s tough being a millennial. A millennial now can get online and view anything on the world wide web and see the absolute horror of what’s going on in the world. Once people were actually shielded from that but now, anything goes.”

Toulson postulates that this exposure to disturbing material and the truths of the world has inflicted an anxiety onto the youngest generation.

“There is some evidence to suggest that for a lot of young people, there is a lot of anxiety around. I believe that if you have a look at the root cause of drug addiction, the driving force is anxiety.

This is why, particularly youth, are much more vulnerable nowadays than they were in the old days even when the economic times were even tougher.

“If you look at history, there is nothing new in human behaviour but there has been a huge change and that’s the change in technology.

Technology is changing so quickly that it is actually raising the levels of anxiety.”

However, Toulson does not see this anxiety as a weakness and has the belief that the millennial generation has the ability to lead the world into a brighter future.

“The millennial generation definitely deserves more respect from older generations. I have a lot of faith in the millennials because they are really the people of tomorrow. There is going to be a big change and that force will start to mobilise and then society will wake up to a rude shock and we are actually seeing evidence of that already. I hope the millennials don’t give up. They really are the future and their children are the future as well.”

He sees the narcissism observed in millennials as simply the ambition young people have to achieve their dreams.

“If you actually want to bring positive change to the world, you’ve got to work hard and you’ve got to look out for yourself first because if you don’t you’re not going to make it. There’s nothing wrong with ambition but it is when people become overly ambitious and they act at the expense of everybody else. I think a lot of millennials have got a good sense of that already.”

If Toulson has taught us anything, it’s that you are not defined by your generation. At the end of day, when you look at generations, all you see is people. People with different work ethics, priorities and ways of living their lives. To put millennials in a box and attach broad qualities to them only represses their ability for selfexpression and alienates them from the older factions of society.

Millennials have a huge voice in society, one that can pass laws and win elections. Belittling their involvement in this process inevitably stalls humanity’s progression into a better future. It’s time to wake up baby boomers. If we want to fix the economy, restore the environment, and make it so I can afford something with four walls in Auckland, it needs to be done with all of us in the conversation, not just you.

Feature | 13

The pros and cons of being a millennial

By Taryn Dryfhout You’ve probably already heard the stereotypes about Millennials – we have short attention spans, we’re lazy and have no work ethic. We feed off technology, have absolutely no life skills, and need our mummies into our thirties.

Technically speaking, I’m in this group. Millennials are those born between the early 1980s and 2000, who were children growing up in the first decade of the new millennium. This means if you are a university student, getting married, having babies or entering the workforce right now, chances are, you also fall into this bracket.

Millennials have been given a bad rap, but is this deserved?

While we may be living a radically different existence than the generation that preceded us, there’s both and good and bad – pros and cons – to being a millennial.

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Cons

Millennials are facing some difficult situations. The following is a list of cons of being a millennial: We are disadvantaged in the workforce Millennials were raised in a time where if you followed the rules, there would be a job at the end of the yellow brick road. We were also promised that going to university would result in us entering the workforce, knee deep in job offers. Of course, for most of us, this did not happen. The global financial crisis of 2007-2008 rewrote the world job market, pulling the rug out for those of us who were not yet settled into a lifelong career.

Innovation is born from hardship. With little career prospects, many millennials have tried their hand at innovative ways to keep themselves afloat financially. From YouTube to online crafts stores, our generation has become all about entrepreneurialism. I fit into this category. I am a 31-year-old freelance writer. For many reasons, working full-time in an office just didn’t work for me. Many millennials reject the traditional idea that jobs take place behind a desk for long hours at a time. They seek, above all things, a work-life balance. As a generation, we have come to place value on flexible work schedules and location independence, and are uncomfortable with conforming to the traditional modes of work.

Because of this attitude to work, it has created the idea that millennials, as a generation of people, are lazy, easily side-tracked job hoppers who want a trophy for just showing up for work.

Generation rent Millennials are having a particularly tough time of it when it comes to owning a home.

Owning my own home isn’t even on my radar. Since I got married, the Reserve Bank has been increasingly adding tighter restrictions on mortgage lending, and with house prices increasing, the deposit is also increasing. The problem is, my income isn’t increasing enough to keep up. It has even been reported that New Zealand is the most expensive country in the world to buy a house, when house prices are compared to incomes. While many baby boomers bought their first home in their early twenties, millennials have been priced out of the housing market. It seems like many people are unable to own a house unless they have rich parents willing to back them, or inherit one. I have come to the realisation that owning a

home is out of reach for me – I won’t ever be leaving ‘Generation Rent’. For millennials, the future of home ownership is looking pretty bleak.

We are chin high in student debt The burden of student loan debt weighs on the finances, and choices that young people make. Not only has high student debt contributed to the drop in home ownership, but research suggests that millennials are living with their parents (or moving back home) until their late twenties. One of the reasons is undoubtedly due to studying and the escalating level of student debt among this generation. While those who attended university in the 1960s

“Millennials were raised in a time where if you followed the rules, there would be a job at the end of the yellow brick road.” through the 1990s received, essentially, a free education, those of us who require the living costs component of the student loan are racking up $15,000 per year.

Having such a high level of student debt is not only bad news for those of us who owe it, but it’s also a drain on society in general.

Many millennials are now taking more than 20 years to pay back their loan, and decisions such as putting off buying a home, or starting a family will undoubtedly have an impact on our future economy.

Feature | 15

Pros

Despite the cons, it’s not all bad. The following is a list of pros of being a millennial:

a woman was almost elected president, and in the days following Trumps election, thousands demonstrated against the result.

We are more educated We might be bogged down by student loans but millennials are quickly becoming the most educated generation in history.

Women, in particular, have overtaken in terms of higher education, earning more diploma’s than their mothers and grandmothers.

We are also, as a group, more accepting than any generation has been. We are more accepting of the LGBTQI+ community and feminist rights, as well as other equality campaigns. We are impacting society positively by being vocal about this and reflecting our feelings with our voting. Millennials are more aware of the big issues, and are fighting back against things that we perceive to be wrong, or negative. The millennial voice is loud and refuses to be complacent. We take to the streets – and social media – to fight for change.

Not only are we more formally educated, but we are a generation of independent thinkers. We constantly question the society we are operating out of, including what we read, what we watch and how we are treated. We also keep ourselves informed by keeping up with news and current events online.

We know our way around technology Millennials are the gods of technology. Having grown up in a time where devices didn’t exist, Millennials have lapped up technology as it has been rolled out, and now use it for everything from online shopping to banking, ordering a ride to creating online pin boards.

Because we are not true digital natives, the advent of smartphones and social media has impacted this generation more potently than any other. As children, we had to write letters to friends we made at camp. Now we add them on Facebook. If we wanted to call home from town, we had to find a payphone, and hope our parents were home to pick up. Now we call anytime, anywhere. Our phones, tablets and laptops are giving us more opportunities than ever to do amazing things that generations before us did not have the chance to do.

We campaign for change Campaigning for change is one of the hallmarks of the millennial generation. If we want change, we lobby for it.

People, more than ever, are starting movements, organising protests and standing up for what they believe in. News coverage every week shows groups and individuals protesting and using their voice for a cause they believe in. Online platforms such as ‘GiveaLittle’ even allow people to gain exposure and raise funds for the causes they are passionate about, from the comfort of their living room. We are living in a time where there is a shift in power, and we have the ability to take a stand. Look, for example, at the latest American presidential election. For the first time in history,

We feel younger for longer For millennials, the average age to get married is between 27 for women, and 29 for men, compared with 20, and 22 in 1950. With people now waiting until later to get married, this often means being older when buying a house, and having children, meaning millennials enjoy their time as ‘young people’ for longer than previous generations. In my grandmother’s time, by the age of 30 women were married and saddled with several children and a mortgage. Today it’s perfectly acceptable for a 30-year-old to be an intern, still living at home or ‘finding themselves’.

Like it or not, we are millennials Fifty years ago, you’d leave school, maybe study, enter the workforce and stay in your chosen field. While you were on the grind, you’d get married, buy a house, have a family, and retire mortgage free, in the same house you bought 40 years earlier.

Millennials don’t want a nine to five job, and we don’t want to stay in it forever. We don’t want to be trapped in one house for the rest of our lives and don’t want to be tied down with children and partners until later in life. Things are changing. The picture for millennials is very different – we are deviating from the ‘old’ norm and trailblazing a new path for ourselves. As the previous generations retire, we are stepping up to take their place, and, as we engage in the world around us, we seek to leave our mark, and change the world in unique, and positive ways.

16 | Giveaways

Giveaways

Win a feast from Pita Pit

All you can eat Hell Pizza

Feeling hungry? Our friends from Pita Pit in Manawatū are offering the mother of all giveaways. To go into the draw to win a free platter of Pita Pit pitas (a maximum of 10 pitas) for you and your flatties, simply send your name, and contact phone number to win@mawsa.org.nz. NOTE: Competition only available to students from Massey’s Manawatū campus.

Go to Hell. HELL Bond Street offers all you can eat pizza between 5pm and 8pm on Mondays. They are situated in a bar so there’s drink specials too.

To celebrate, we have 12 all you can eat vouchers to giveaway. To enter, send your name and contact number to win@mawsa.org.nz. NOTE: Competition only available to students from Massey’s Wellington campus.

ASB Auckland Marathon

Original Shapes

We are giving away a free entry to the John West 12km Traverse! This is your chance to join in New Zealand’s biggest, most iconic, colourful, cultural running celebration, and the John West 12km Traverse is the quickest way across the bridge on two legs! To win, email your name and contact phone number to win@mawsa.org.nz. NOTE: Competition only available to students from Massey’s Albany campus.

New Zealanders rejoice! Original Shapes in Cheese and Bacon and Cheddar flavours are back! Fancy yourself a Shapes Originals fan?

Study got you hungry? We’ve got you covered with all five Original Shapes , including Cheese and Bacon, Cheddar, Barbecue, Pizza, and Chicken Crimpy flavours. We have three prize packs up for grabs, just email win@mawsa.org.nz with your name and contact number to go into the draw to win.

Nab a Student Card Grab a deal. We have two student cards to giveaway. Normally worth $20 these gems will score you discounted food, booze, clothes, travel and even makeup. If you want to get your hot little hands on one of these cards email your name and contact phone number through to win@mawsa.org.nz

Opinion | 17

A Pinch of Politics with Natasha Tziakis

Resignations can be awkward sometimes, but nothing is more awkward than hanging around after that resignation.

Andrew Little, former leader of the Labour Party, stepped down from his leadership position on August 1 following dismal poll ratings and a caucus meeting.

I’ve recently started making the joke that Labour’s leadership changes as often as the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts. The thing separating Little from Hogwarts is that he died a social grisly death, not by magic, but by words.

These words often slammed him because he was too honest, idealistic and a bit robotic. His honesty and idealism is what I admired about him. Little was always the first to step up to the plate to admit he was wrong and, seemingly, strived for the most positive future for New Zealanders. Yes, the policies under Little’s leadership left a little bit to be desired, but he always seemed to try his hardest.

This was ultimately his undoing.

In an interview with One News on July 30, following dismal results from a Colmar Brunton poll, Little said, “I would be lying if I hadn’t thought about that [standing down].” With his honesty and by owning up to the polls, he essentially became defeated in most people’s eyes. How can a political party leader potentially lead New Zealand if they are already doubting themselves?

Jacinda Ardern, Little’s successor, has been with the Labour party for nine years and has quickly moved through the ranks.

Ardern has proven herself time and time again. Now her biggest concern should be whether 51 days is enough time for her to build the Labour Party back up in the minds of the public. Campaigning and getting herself onto the 6pm news would be the biggest advantage for Ardern as she will gain more exposure and be at the forefront of people’s minds.

Following the announcement, the one question I have is that why now? Why didn’t Little resign earlier to give Ardern a better chance at leading Labour to a potential success? Or why didn’t he hang on and then resign after the election was over?

What tipped Little over the edge?

I think that we all have to remember that, just as with Metiria Turei on the heels of her recent benefit fraud announcement, politicians are people as well. And they will doubt themselves, they will get tired and over it all and they will want to give up, whether that comes to fruition or not. is another story. Although we all need to keep in mind our humanity and kindness when discussing politicians, we also do have a right to be angry as they are the people we are placing our trust into and advocating for.

Regardless of what happens now, Ardern is under a lot of pressure and this will be a defining time in her political career.

Turei won’t seek ministerial position Co-Leader of the Green Party, Metiria Turei, has announced she will not be seeking a ministerial position should the Labour Party enter a coalition government with the Green Party after the upcoming elections.

Turei found herself in hot water earlier this month when she admitted she lied about the amount of flatmates she had when receiving the Domestic Purposes Benefit.

It was later revealed she enrolled in an address where she didn't live to vote for a friend who was running as a candidate in Mt Albert electorate in 1993.

“That was a mistake – one of many I, like many other people, made as a young person," she said in a statement.

She has since met with investigators from the Ministry of Social Development.

“Or why didn’t he hang on and then resign after the election was over?”

18 | Interview

The face behind Avocado on Toast

A podcast for millennials

Interview | 19

Massive Magazine sat down to avo’ good chat with communications student Hazel Osbourne, the brains behind Avocado on Toast, the capital’s newest podcast, which looks at millennial’s problems and how they bite back. The podcast is produced and developed at Wellington Access Radio, where Osbourne is currently interning.

What do you study?

I study a bachelor of communications, majoring in Journalism.

Tell me about Avocado on Toast, where did the idea come from?

The whole idea for Avocado on Toast basically came from me considering a radio show that would appeal to my peers. My flat mates and I were kinda just sitting around watching television and I was harassing them, asking for ideas and we eventually decided that avocado on toast was a good combo of funny, relevant, and memorable.

What themes will you explore? Why? Well, so far I have released three episodes which are all topics that affect Gen Y (millennials) specifically focusing on students and young professionals. It’s tricky picking specific themes when there is so much quality content at my fingertips but the way I focus on what to cover stems from my own personal experiences and putting the feelers out to see if others are affected by whatever I’m thinking of also. So I think the themes I will explore with this podcast will essentially cater to my target audience while also having a more intimate feel, which I think podcast do well themselves as a media platform.

Who is your audience?

So it’s gotta be your average student/yo-pro millennial type figure.

I wanted to create content that my peers enjoyed so that they felt represented in the media. I know there is already so much for millennials out there but the topics I’m covering as I said before basically come from conversations I’ve had with friends and people my age about topics that impact their day-to-day.

How have you chosen themes that will be relevant to your audience?

As cliche as it sounds, it’s basically about opening up a dialogue between me and my audience. I’ve had people private messaging me with ideas that they’ve had after listening to an episode and it’s really important to me that I take on these suggestions seriously because ultimately I’m here to create content my listeners want.

What do you think it is about podcasts that appeal to a younger generation?

I think that there’s this denigration of news media, especially in an age of Facebook algorithms and Seven Sharp, that makes a lot of our news seem untrustworthy or not as thorough as we expect news to be. Podcasts are not only an excellent platform for long form journalism but when you listen to a podcast, to a conversation

between two people it gives this element of intimacy with the information you’re absorbing. I loved podcasts for a long time for these exact reasons.

What are three podcasts you would recommend?

To support New Zealand broadcasting I’m going to have to say Black Hands- a family mass murder about the Baine family murders, Caucus which is excellent in the lead up to our election and of course media watch, which has helped me think critically about the media for a while now.

Do you think radio is a dying medium? Why, why not? Has there been a recent surge in its popularity, especially for a younger audience?

I don’t think it is, no. People said that it would die out when the television was introduced as a new way of getting information but it’s still kicking around. Radio and podcasts aren’t a new way of getting information, a lot of people consider podcasts to be a product of our generation but they’re basically radio shows formatted for an online context. Like most technology, radio will adapt and for that, I think it’s not going anywhere.

How do you enjoy your avocado?

Smashed with feta and tomato, aha.

Millennials are often labelled as avocado-loving, bad with money, self-obsessed and lazy. Why do you think they are labelled this way? Is it true?

I think it’s really easy to label millennials that in the age of convenience we live in currently, we are self-obsessed for sure but a whole generation can’t be blamed for an attitude that was basically invented by baby-boomers. If you google search ‘millennials are killing…’ it comes up with a multitude of ridiculous excuses where our generation is supposedly single-handedly responsible for the downfall of every industry you could think of. I think this just shows how eager older generations are to criticise millennials. I’m gonna get a tiny bit political and say that boomers are so eager to vote for policies that enable them to remain financially top-dog. If this isn’t self-obsession I don’t know what is. They should technically be focusing on the future of the country but every time a boomer votes to make their housing portfolio more lucrative they’re making my first home less affordable for me.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Who knows really, probably, hopefully, 32.

“...[we] can’t be blamed for an attitude that was basically invented by baby-boomers.”

20 | Feature

Era by era

We chat to a baby boomer, a millennial, and a gen x

By Jamie-Lee Bracken It comes as no surprise to hear that millennials are often labelled harshly- whether it is lazy, bratty or entitled- just to name a few. It’s also no surprise that these insults often come from the ‘critical’ baby boomer generation.

Baby boomers lament that the world they grew up in was much harder and far less forgiving, something they claim millennials have not experienced and are unaware of.

She says like most young adults, by the age of 18 her primary concern was figuring out where she wanted to go with her life and what she wanted to study.

She was expected to attend university, but this was something she wanted for herself.

While money has not been a huge concern for her she says she is still concerned about costs of studying on top of a student loan.

She understands in a broad sense that there are expectations on her to own a house “a lot sooner than what I will” she says. Also, the choice is completely up to her about when she marries and what she does as a career.

“I’m definitely expected to have a job and a career of my own. The direction I choose is completely up to me and no body expects any specifics from me,” says Ainsworth.

Ainsworth is thankful that being her age now means she can do more of what she wants without restriction, due to increasing gender equality. Something she thinks must have been difficult for people growing up in older generations.

“It can only get better and I love that I can choose to do whatever I want and not think twice about suitably because of my gender,” says Ainsworth.

But with housing affordability at a crisis point, and the environment taking a hammering, many millennials feel as though they have been dealt with an equally as hard hand.

Right now she is focused on completing her study and ensuring she can afford to live in Wellington. In the future, her greatest concern is money and if and when she can buy a house, whilst saving and still balancing a career and family.

Then we have the folk from ‘gen x’, the group of people commonly credited with being the generation who held the minds of those who created technology as we know it today – think Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. While the young millennials look up to them, baby boomers are quick to critique their lack of life experience.

Ainsworth believes that millennials are facing completely different issues to those of gen x and baby boomers. She understands that social media has been a significant catalyst for change by altering the way we interact and solve problems.

But is there really that much difference between the life of a 20-year-old today, and a young adult 50 years ago?

“There are completely different issues we [millennials] are faced with but some things remain the same of course. But all generations can learn a lot from each other,” she says.

Millennials Sometimes referred to as generation Y, millennials are all those born between the early 1980s and early 2000s.

Penelope Ainsworth is a 20-year-old Victoria University student.

She starts her morning like most millennials with a scroll through her phone. After checking all her notifications, she gets up, gets dressed and has a coffee.

On her days off, you could find her watching Game of Thrones or Grey’s Anatomy. You could even catch her eating at Ayutthaya Thai in the Wellington suburb of Petone or cooking in her kitchen.

Millennials often cop a lot of slack from those in other generations and are labelled as ‘lazy’. This is something Ainsworth doesn’t agree with.

“They [baby boomers] don’t seem to understand how the world has changed and that we as millennials are facing a very different world to them,” she says.

She instead would describe her generation as educated, open minded and accepting. While she acknowledges youth of today have a lot to learn, she says she looks to gen X for advice, as she feels she could learn a lot from them.

“They’re the role models in my life. The ones I look up to for advice and help, but also the ones teaching me. There is a lot to learn from them,” says Ainsworth.

Generation X Generation X is those born from the mid 1960s to the early 1980s.

Sarah Grant-Wang is part of the gen x crowd, a generation of people accredited with possessing the best characteristics of both the millennials and baby boomers.

Like most of those in gen x, Grant-Wang is busy with her young family. She starts off her mornings by picking up her baby, daughter Fin Joy, and giving her a cuddle before heading off to work.

Grant-Wang says she grew up on a farm and feels very fortunate to not have had any big struggles in her youth.

“I had no struggles and am very fortunate to not have had any, I am very privileged to have lived the life I have in my family,” she says.

At the age of 18, and like most in her generation, she was expected to settle down buy a house, have a job and a family.

Her family didn’t want her to go to university and instead suggested she get a job and stay at home as a married woman with kids because that’s what her parents did.

However, Grant-Wang says her top priority was saving enough money to be able to travel.

“The world needed exploring and I needed to do it,” says GrantWang.

Feature | 21

Grant-Wang certainly achieved her goals- she went on to complete four degrees and travelled the world, visiting many exciting places and even meeting her now husband in China.

“I’ve learnt a lot over the years, I can say that I’ve followed my dreams and I’ve conquered the five dreams I had in occupations so I’m happy.

“Now I have some new dreams,” she says.

Like her fellow gen x-ers, her biggest concern nowadays is her family. She lives in New Zealand while her parents remain in England.

Her biggest concern for the future is the environment. Grant-Wang hopes that we can preserve our environment before it’s too late.

“I’m worried that all the oceans will become just desert, there will be no fish in the oceans,” she says.

Grant-Wang works with younger people. She says its always interesting to see the emphasis on social media as a way for young people to engage and communicate with each other.

This technological advancement is one of the biggest of her time she says.

She didn’t have a computer until she was 25 and got her first phone at 24. If she needed to call someone she would use the phone at home.

Grant-Wang says that millennials are ‘selfie-obsessed’ and spend a lot of time on social media like Instagram, Twitter and other “communicationy thingys”.

She herself tried to stay off mobile phones for as long as she could and only got one as part of her job. Nowadays she does see that it has more benefits than she thought.

“It’s a way to get connected with friends overseas and show pictures of what you’re doing,” she says.

Baby Boomer Baby boomers are those born between 1946 and 1964.

Tone Te Ahuru considers himself very similar to most other baby boomers in his generation.

“When you get older, you don’t give a stuff about a lot of things, it’s like a been there done that sort of thing,” he says.

These days he’s more aware of his health and well being. He starts his mornings with a prayer, opens his curtains and windows and then gets on with his day.

In his downtime you could find him watching Sunday Theatre on television, or keeping fit at the gym.

He loves Malaysian cafes which are a homage to his Malaysian ancestry.

Baby boomers are known for being hard on millennials. Te Ahuru says social media is what sets millennials apart from those of different generations.

“Generations these days rely a lot on it [social media], and grow up influenced by it. They rely so much on it,” he says.

When he was younger, Te Ahuru like most other baby boomers, would play out on the street or at friend’s houses. Most, if not all interaction was done face to face. On the odd occasion, he’d use a phone to ring a friend.

Growing up he was expected to get a good education and get a house… eventually. He wanted to get a good education to ensure a better job opportunities in the future. He didn’t attend university but did attend courses and ensured he always picked up part-time jobs to “put his foot in the door”.

At 18, Te Ahuru had left school and his single focus was to make sure he knew what he was doing career wise to ensure his success and having grown up in a single parent home he wanted to make sure he could help his family.

“I wanted to make sure I did well to help my mum and younger siblings and the only way I could do that was to get a good education and job,” he says.

“When you get older, you don’t give a stuff about a lot of things...”

Nowadays Te Ahuru focuses on health and financial security as he’s getting older. However family, caring for them and ensuring their well-being is still paramount.

“I got a house when I was a bit older with my father and stayed focused on my family and making sure they’re all okay,” says Te Ahuru.

In his life the biggest advancement in society is the recognition of New Zealand as multicultural. He is thankful to have seen the Maori language and culture appreciated in our country.

Te Ahuru understands that gen x-ers, like baby boomers, are career driven and want to maintain a good career. He says that millennials do have it slightly easier than what they ever did.

“We had to figure it all out by ourselves nothing was ever handed to us.”

So underneath all the labels, these three ‘generations’ aren’t as starkly different as people commonly assume. Aside from obvious differences, be it social media and access to new technology to help in everyday life, at the core, there’s not an awful lot that warrants the cross generational ‘who had it easier or harder’ debate.

Even though the gen x-ers and baby boomers were expected to settle down sooner than millennials, all three generations consider family and their future as one of their primary concerns. On a global scale, they all want to help preserve the Earth.

Ainsworth, Grant-Wang and Te Ahuru all grew up in very different ways. However, it’s important to note that their goals for the future unite them and show that their core values are very much the same.

22 | Interview

Massey’s Queen of DIY An interview with Yanita McLeay

By Nikki Papatsoumas Many students may find themselves glued to television screens for the latest series of The Block NZ. But what you might not know is contestant Yanita McLeay is a Massey University student. The 29-year-old has paired up with her best friend and freelance designer Stace Cottrill on The Block NZ, as this year’s Team Orange, with the hope of walking away with any profit their house makes when it is sold at the end of the season.

In between the chaos of painting walls and furnishing rooms, Massive Magazine was lucky enough to have a quick e-chat with McLeay.

studies while on it. Massey has allowed me to put them on hold during the three months of filming. I will be straight back into completing them once we wrap up on site. By December I should have completed by PhD in Sport Science (fingers crossed).

What tools should every respectable DIYer have in their tool belt?

Is being a contestant on The Block NZ different to what you expected? Have you been a big fan of the show in the past?

The one thing we are always needing (and always losing!) are our utility knives!

I’ve watched previous seasons of The Block and thought ‘this looks quite hard’. A week into it we realised that it is SO much harder than expected. Most days we work 17 to 18 hours a day and its all under significant pressure. It is a physically, emotionally and mentally challenging game.

What’s the hardest part of being on The Block NZ? Sleep deprivation has to be the hardest thing on The Block. Trying to finish a room (or two) in five days becomes a million times harder when you are living off two to three hours sleep consecutively.

She’s a big job and not an easy one!

What’s the best part of being on The Block NZ? Being able to have a vision and create it within a week. Nothing beats seeing a room go from a timber skeleton to a vibrant space that was only a sketch five days earlier.

How did you feel when you got the call confirming you would be a contestant this season?

We actually got told in person! Production organised a ‘mandatory medical exam’ for all the teams that attended casting weekend.

Turned out only four teams were called up, the ‘doctor’ was Mark Richardson, and we were ‘prescribed 12 weeks of renovations’ haha. We were shocked and extremely excited!

Who do you think is your biggest competition?

Every team is our biggest competition. Everyone brings a unique set of skills and varying levels of competitiveness.

What’s your favourite paint colour?

Right now I am LOVING the deep tones. Inky blues and teals are super hot.

How are you juggling uni work with competing on the block?

The Block is a 24/7 gig and there is no way I could continue my

Which is the room you are most excited to design?

I am super excited to design our master bedroom and ensuite. The Block houses this year have insane views of the city and Rangitoto and we have some epic ideas for this space that utilises these views.

How does it feel to see yourself on television?

Seeing myself on television is a little surreal! When we can, the teams all sit down to watch the show together and it doesn’t really feel like we are watching ourselves. Its almost like an out-of-body experience!

What’s your top tips for the everyday Kiwi designer?

Don’t be afraid to use colour! Paint is such an epic way to bring a space to life and you can achieve so many different moods just by slapping some colour on the walls!

“Everyone brings a unique set of skills and varying levels of competitiveness.”

Artist Feature | 23

Artist Feature:

Jerry Ramirez

Jerry Ramirez studies fine arts at Massey University and recently finished an overseas exchange in California. While there he made a performance art video which went viral. It has over 500,000 views on YouTube and was posted on many blogs including George Takei’s Facebook page and Ladbible, where a shortened version of it had over five million views. Massive chatted with the artist about his new series of work – Women from Tinder.

Can you explain the idea behind your Women from Tinder series of work?

This idea came up when I decided to try using Tinder when I was on my exchange. I started coming across these heavily funny profiles and after a while started taking screenshots of them with the intention of drawing them. After two months of using Tinder I hadn’t met a single person from it, but I had amassed hundreds of screenshots. Initially I thought about making a zine or something of 15 or so drawings of them. I hadn’t ever used Instagram and partially due to laziness and general accessibility I opted to make an Instagram for it instead. I had a look to see if there were any similar pages on Instagram and there were a few but they were all very misogynistic and just purely making fun of people.

My intent with Women from Tinder is to present these profiles without commenting on them. I think they have their own artistic merit without me needing to add anything. I guess the project is a comment on modern dating, and how we choose to present ourselves online. My main aspiration for this project is to inspire a woman to make a Men from Tinder type blog.

Tell me about your performance art video?

I made that as a final project for my performance for the camera class at University of California, San Diego. I had seen the preachers around a lot during my time in America and noticed when people argued with them they just got angrier and no progress was made.

Rather than arguing against the preacher’s ridiculous ideals and ethics I decided to join his side by repeating everything he said at the top of my voice. This drew a fair amount of attention to him as before he was mostly ignored, but nobody was on his side.

Except me.

What inspires you?

Last week I saw a sign for a dress code which said “no jandals, no midriff,” and thought, “damn that’s funny as hell.” I’ll probably slot that into something I make in the future whether it be a movie, a background of a painting or in the lyrics of a song.

What is your aesthetic?

My aesthetic is ‘don’t try’, I am a perfectionist that gave up a long time ago and now I tend to do things as efficiently as I can without spending too much time on it. The work I make when I don’t try too hard is generally the best and most unscathed from over-thinking.

Who is your favourite artist?

My favourite artists tend to be ones who do many different things rather than doing one thing really well. I like John Baldessari’s I will not make boring art, to me the concept is usually more important than appearance since beautiful art is already everywhere. In saying that, I still have a look I strive for and don’t like some art just because of what it looks like. I don’t like the art of Keith Harris.

What do you see in your future as an artist?

I would actually rather mainly make films and music than be an full-time artist. I don’t like how the art world works, and I can’t be bothered following their rules to success, even though it’s the same in film and music, but I think it’s more worth it for a career in those.

If I do pursue a future as an artist, I forsee a lot of struggle and pain (makes for great art), and a possibly young death followed by a worldwide discovery and post-mortem appreciation for everything I ever created my entire life.

As an artist what is the best piece of advice you have ever received?

This probably came from a professor I had while in San Diego, because often my work is funny, she began to pick up on that and gave me the valuable advice to not make being funny the centrepiece of my art. Unless there is more substance than a joke it’s probably boring art. And the one thing I will never do is make boring art.

Find out more: https://jerrygarciaramirez.wixsite.com/ mynameisjerryramirez @womenfromtinder

24 |

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26 | Opinion

How New Zealand’s mental health system has failed millennials

By Laura Macdonald A girl walks into a doctor’s office. It sounds like the start of a bad joke – and it really is. Said girl, with Panadol still dissolving in her system from last week’s attempted overdose, nervously reaches out to doctor for help. Doctor skates over girl’s suicide attempt confession and instead prescribes eating some vegetables and getting some fresh air. Girl walks out of doctor’s office.

That’s it. That’s the punchline.

That’s the sad joke of New Zealand’s mental health system.

Over the past twenty years, mental health awareness has been beamed into our living rooms in the form of rugby deity John Kirwan huskily admitting to his own depression. This then spawned an entire movement of organisations dedicated to scrubbing away the taboo around mental health. Within the past couple months alone, we’ve had a tear-stained Jono Pryor and controversial Netflix series 13 Reasons Why plastered across our screens. And while staunch, leathery farmers are still wary of the latest farmstrong.co.nz initiative, the millennial generation has grown up with John Kirwan’s affirmations ringing in our ears. And while I don’t speak for every millennial, our generation is the pioneer of putting hands up and confidently asking for help. Except that help isn’t there.

The New Zealand government’s answer to the mental health crisis is quite simply understaffed, under-qualified and under-funded. It can be seen in the suicidal people waiting for hours in emergency departments across the country, ‘psychiatric assistants’ that did an online course on mental health trying to grapple with complex patients and vital mental health facilities stuttering to a close as funding has run out.

Nationwide director of mental health services Doctor John Crawshaw insists that there’s been an 18 per cent increase in mental health funding since 2008. However, this meant nothing for Waves, New Plymouth’s centre for youth counselling, when it was forced to close in 2015 due to lack of government funding. And 18 per cent was just a figure to Wellington’s Evolve Youth Clinic when they were forced to turn away over 500 teenagers for six months’ due to under-funding. Youthline was also sucker punched with a Government funding cut late last year, leaving them struggling to answer one in every four calls they received.

Those that do manage to sniff out some help often find their needs aren’t met. Take for example the girl at the beginning of the story.

Which, by the way, was me. Paying $78.50 to be told to go for a run

and eat better to cure my crippling depression was a harder pill to swallow than the Panadol, but it was the only help I could find.

Counsellors were booked up for weeks, and even then I was a little dubious of someone with a home-printed certificate from an online three-month course on mental health.

Hannah* is in her third year of nursing, and she expresses the same thought. “These people are under-qualified and they’re often dealing with really complex high-risk patients,” she says.

If the needs of these patients aren’t properly met, Hannah often greets them when they’re admitted to her in the mental health inpatient unit. But while they get the care they need under the roof of the inpatient unit, the same can’t be said after they’re waved goodbye at the door.

“I think there needs to be more monitoring after they’re let out,” says Hannah. “They have a ‘safety plan’ but not a lot of follow-up really, and people without strong family support almost always relapse and come in again.”

Luckily, I was a few pills short of being admitted to ED and then being wheeled into the mental health inpatient unit, but this speaks volumes in itself. Patients are admitted to the unit after an intervention from the mental health crisis team or a trip to the ED, which makes units like these the ambulance at the bottom of the cliff. If more resources and funding were pumped into keeping facilities like Waves open or training people to get the right qualifications, Hannah might actually get a break during the day and I might not have looked twice at painkillers.

Crawshaw maintains that mental health is influenced by social factors like low income and unemployment levels. This isn’t a hard claim to fathom when professional psychologists charge upwards of $150 an hour. The only facility where they can access help completely free of charge is inside a mental health inpatient unit.

But by the time they’re in a bad enough state to be considered a referral to the unit, it’s often too late.

So what do the New Zealand Ministry of Health have to show for their 2016 report – optimistically called “Rising to the challenge” – and an 18 per cent increase in funding? Mental health facilities straining at the seams, under-qualified health professionals, and a girl with a bottle of pills fizzing in the pit of her stomach. *Name has been changed

Opinion | 27

28 | Feature

Places to eat Avocado

By Karleisha Wills Personally, I don’t eat much avocado. I actually only tried it for the first time three years ago. I’m 24. what. a. milestone. Not as much as the fact I’ve never seen The Sound of Music.

So when my Facebook feed exploded with young millennials outrage over one man’s claim that we couldn’t afford to ‘live to dream’, due to our oblivious binging and splurging of dollars on too much avocado on toast, I had a wee laugh least to say.

I am way too poor to waste my dividends on some fucking avocado that cost $6.50 each in the off season, to find out that it’s probably brown on the inside anyway. Great. Yeah, I can’t afford a mortgage either.

So, Here are my top seven locations you can eat avocado on toast around town.

At the beach Why? Because who doesn’t love the risk of sand in their food?

Great views, and maybe a windless sunny day could be in the works to nicely complement your food of premium selection.

A cafe Because I want to spend my money. Clearly.

Also looks good combined with a killer long black on my snap story.

Home The other half of your avo is in desperate need of being eaten and will probably pass tomorrow. Also bread is guaranteed to always be on hand.

For bonus points, spend some more dosh on a tomato. Seasoned with salt and pepper, it’s guaranteed to be a winner.

“For bonus points, spend some more dosh on tomato.”

Instagram Your dreams of affording to actually go out and buy this are only fantasies actualised on someone else’s insta feed. Which then leads in a disastrous tendency to go out seeking to quench that avo craving.

Uni Pre-packing your lunch is affordable, so pre-packing your avo and bread for toast must be too, right?

The car You’re already ten-thirty minutes late to class and needed a quick fill of food. Bread can toast while you get dressed, and the avo can be easily spread on as you exit the front door. Maybe your Uber driver won’t mind that you forgot a plate and still have the butter knife in your hand?

Friends What better way to gather, than over some avocado on toast.

You can all make it your own way, have platter tastings and have a silent judging comp to rate each other. Winner gets a whole bag of avocados. Obviously.

Feature | 29

Shitty student flats: A behind the scenes look at terrifying living conditions

This year, the shitty state of student flats right across the country has been a talking point. As students struggle to make ends meet, their quality of living takes a hit. Many now have to deal with mould, leaks, creaks and freezing cold temperatures in their own home. It’s a fight for survival. We ask students to share their flatting horror stories with us.

As the weather gets worse the many faults in my flat start to appear.

There is no ventilation in the bathroom so every time we shower, the steam has nowhere to go. This has caused the lino floor in the bathroom to get rotten and mouldy and to pull away from the wall.

The house is damp and cold, I spend more time in my car than at home to stay warm. When the rain is strong, leaks spring up in the ceiling above my bedroom. I have buckets lined up on the floor to collect the drips and keep the carpet from getting soaked. This isn’t the worst student flat I’ve lived in though. To find affordable student living, sacrifices must be made. Heating becomes a treat as most flats are un-insulated and have no heating system. Students suffer in terrible conditions in an effort to afford an education.

– As told to Massive Magazine by second year Communications student Mikayla Hopkins

“If you live below us – I’m sorry if our oven falls through your roof.”

My flat is notorious for being disgusting but after living here for almost two years I know that it has potential. At first glance the flats are cool, they have that New York City loft vibe going on but spend a night here and you’ll be asking yourself – loft or concrete cell block? We pay a shit load of rent to be packed like sardines into a very small space. Some of the rooms are divided by paper thin walls, not to mention there are no doors or windows on all but one of the rooms. Your breathing whilst sleeping becomes in sync with your flatmates in the next room and if you want to go to sleep early well too bad – sound travels pretty easily when there are no doors to shut it out. The kitchen – if you can call it that – fits one person at a time. You need to have pretty good balance as the floor is on a slope. Also watch out for puddles as the bench doesn’t have a lip on it so washing the dishes causes water to dribble all over the already rotten floor. If you live below us – I’m sorry if our oven falls through your roof. If you are ever starving have a search in the bathroom as we once had mushrooms growing out of the bottom of the shower. We did complain about the mouldy shower but apparently pulling the wood away and cover up the mould again will fix it? Well a few months later – the mould is back! What would improve the quality of this flat is some decent walls, doors, an upgraded kitchen and a bathroom free of fungus.

– As told to Massive Magazine by a third year Visual Communications Design student

Do you live in a shitty student flat? We want to hear from you!

Share your story by emailing editor@mawsa.org.nz

30 |

Feature | 31

I feel like I’ve seen this movie before

By Charlie Pearson Millennial: a person reaching young adulthood in the early 21st century. But is that all the word means? Obviously not, I just thought a rhetorical question would be a nice way to start this piece. I would argue that that definition is just the beginning, the crack of light as you open the door to unpack this simultaneously arbitrary and polarising term. I myself am a millennial (and yet, I would never self-identify as one) as is every single other person in my generation – but then, that’s exactly the point. That’s like saying, I’m white, just like every other white person. I’m getting side tracked. There are probably numerous reasons why I, and many others like me, don’t label ourselves as millennials (maybe I’ll start calling myself a Gen-Yer – on second thoughts, nope) but I would argue that the biggest put-off comes from the fact that more often than not, when someone uses the word millennial they do so with demeaning intentions, reducing the word to a negative stereotype as a way to belittle or reduce our value. These people in question, for the most part, are those who don’t fall into the Generation Y bracket, but came before it.

Cross generational conflict this isn’t a new thing, either. Its current regurgitation, ‘baby boomers vs millennials’ (I imagine that very line has been used in more than enough news stories at this point) rings almost hollow, because there was a time when the baby boomers were in our very position. Ironic, right? That quote about not learning from history never loses its value. Baby boomers (if you think about the term for too long it starts to sound like a club who blow up babies) get their name from the ‘boom’ in births that occurred post-World War II. Previous to this time, the very notion of youth culture didn’t even exist; young people were viewed by society as imitations of the older generations, and treated as such.

By the 1960s, as the baby boomers were coming of age, their sheer size made people pay attention, their large population pushed them out from the shadows of their parents. Companies began advertising towards the youth and made music for them (rock’n’roll, specifically). The word ‘teenager’ spilled into everyday language.

Youth became a thing in its own right, and as that happened, backlash about their behaviour and morals followed. We know today that ‘rebelling’ is a common part of the growing up process, but in the 60s, parents and the older generation were outraged when the boomers stopped doing what they were told. The hippie movement, standing up for civil rights, protesting the Vietnam War. The baby boomers symbolised peace, anti-war sentiments and tolerance in a traditional world, a world run by the very people they opposed. The older generations chided baby boomers for their resistance, where they were happy to conform to governmental

and societal expectations. The polar views created a rift between the baby boomers and those who had lived through the World War, not unlike the divide we see today. Then, if we go back further, to the 1920s, when jazz was ultra-modern, young people loved it and the older generations thought it was the sound that would signal Armageddon. Jazz celebrated the African American experience in a time of segregation and extreme racism. A figure from the time wrote, “when my grandmother found out I was playing jazz music . . . she told me that I had disgraced the family and forbade me to live at the house [anymore].” Many truly believed that it was the ‘devil’s music’, but for young people it meant liberation.

What’s happening now, in many ways feels like a photocopy. The young people of the 20s became the traditionalists shaking their fingers at the young baby boomers, and now the baby boomers are shaking their fingers at us. No longer rebellious and progressive, they’ve taken the seats of their parents, and we have picked up the baton that they dropped. That fighting attitude that fueled antiVietnam War protests has now been appropriated by millennials as we tackle modern issues: immigration, the war against ISIS, the LGBTQI+ community, gender equality, racial diversity, the environment . . . and more often than not, the opinion that each generation holds toward these issues is in direct opposition. But we already know this, because it’s the world we’re living in right now.

Technology plays a role here in a way that it didn’t in the 60s; young people tend to be much more tech oriented and adopt new innovations in a way that the oldies simply can’t keep up with. In a way, the domains of social media and large parts of the internet feel like they’ve been monopolised by the young simply because of our engagement with them. We get our news and entertainment online, while the older generations still predominantly get theirs from the television and print media. What this means is that the generations experience the world in fundamentally different ways. More importantly, cross-over isn’t high and that creates division because baby boomers have less opportunity to see from millennials’ perspective and vice versa. Perspective is important, but we’ll come back to this later.

Back to my original point, the generational conflict has not been kind to the word ‘millennial’ (and maybe ‘baby boomer’, to a lesser degree). It’s been caught in the crossfire. Two crossfires really– Let me explain: what I’ve been mostly focused on up to this point is millennial as another word for liberal, where the word is a stand-in for an entire political agenda. A generalisation, granted, but one that is at least founded in some truth (had only 18-29 year old’s been eligible to vote in the 2016 USA election, Clinton would’ve

32 | Feature

easily won the presidency, for example). This umbrella term, unsurprisingly, has been sharpened into a knife by conservatives, a knife that they’ll happily use as a weapon to stab the young people, whose progressive ideals contradict the traditional values they are trying so hard to uphold. In their battle, they’ve also fashioned a new meaning for the word ‘snowflake’, but that’s another rabbit hole I won’t go into. The second perspective is that we are lazy and entitled. Millennials are caricatured as the ‘Me Generation’.

We don’t know what “a real day’s work” is, our faces are always glued to our phones and the only thing we’re concerned with is our Instagram aesthetic. I will have you know, I don’t even know how to take a good selfie, that’s how… un-narcissistic I am. And because one example speaks for an entire generation, I have just debunked that myth. Though, I do love to be entitled so I guess the old folks got something right about us.

“...and now the baby boomers are shaking their fingers at us.”

Whether or not any of these things is true, millennial no longer means quite the same thing it did when it was first coined. Words have a way of doing that though. ‘Queer’ used to be an insult for gay people (it also meant ‘to feel sick’) but it’s since been reappropriated and many people in the LGBTQI+ community now label themselves as queer. African Americans were once called ‘negroes’, and that was the politically correct term, but that word has since come to symbolise oppression and slavery. ‘Daddy’ used to be what little kids said when they wanted their fathers’ attention, recently that word has slipped into modern lingo with a far more sexually charged meaning. Just as the way we talk and the words we use changes through history and across contexts (think, the way you talk to a close friend compared to a work colleague), the very definitions of those words also comes under scrutiny, at the whim of the social climate.

What’s happening here is the same old tussle. The old butting heads with the new, tradition in combat with modernity, the young verses the not-young-anymore. We’ve been here before, it’s nothing new, we’re just using different words this time around. It’s

like we’ve been handed a cake, but on top of the cake there’s one of those little name-tag-flag-thingys poked in it that says: ‘roast chicken’ so now it’s not a cake anymore, it’s a roast chicken. What we’re looking at is an age-old conflict, but we’re being told that it’s never happened before.

As both generations become more and more separated, by technology and politics and unfair stereotypes, what we have to keep in mind is: perspective. That ability to see the world through the eyes of people who aren’t like us. Empathy. When we take the time to engage with those who are different to us, it becomes hard to hate them; the negative stereotypes we once painted those people with – stereotypes that we readily used to explain and rationalise our ‘opinions’ – they fall away, and from behind it all, there is a person.

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34 | Opinion

Transgender in sport: What constitutes a woman?

The Yarns from Pitch Five

Massive’s resident sports jockey, Adam Pearse, tackles the sporting quandaries of our time with the skill of Saville, the daring of Devillin, and the vibrancy of Veitchy (forgetting his history with stairways). From cricket to croquet and everything in between, these are the Yarns from Pitch Five.

Even as I contemplate writing about this issue, I could see the figurative landmines appear around me that I would have to be careful to avoid. Then again, nothing is too contentious for a Yarn from Pitch Five so let’s get bloody stuck in.

For those of you lucky enough not to be lectured on the topic by a Green Party- voting, petition-clipboard-toting social justice warrior, transgender people are those who transition from one gender to another. The movement hit the spotlight when Bruce became Caitlyn and the world seemed to care an awful lot about the genitalia of the least popular person on Keeping Up With The Kardashians.

The controversy lies in recent protests over male-to-female transition athletes competing in female competitions where some competitors feel those who have transitioned hold a distinct advantage. A great example of this is New Zealand weightlifter, Laurel Hubbard, who is a trans woman and won a prominent weightlifting competition in Australia earlier this year. She lifted a whopping 268kg which was 20kg more than any other competitor had lifted. Despite Hubbard meeting all the requirements to compete in the women’s category, other competitors still had the nerve to say she didn’t belong and that she had an advantage over those that were born a woman, so much so that some lifters have resorted to losing weight to compete outside Hubbard’s weight division. Hubbard is set to represent New Zealand at the 2018 Commonwealth Games and as that draws closer, this debate will get as hot as Satan’s balls in the summertime.

The International Olympic Committee (IOC) have made some attempt to address the contention, introducing policy that allows female-to-male athletes to compete “without restriction”.

Meanwhile, trans woman athletes must undergo hormone therapy to be eligible for an Olympic Games. I don’t know about you but

this just makes sense. Whether women will accept it, men have greater physical capabilities on account of their physiology. Some of these capabilities come down to how much testosterone is in their bodies as we’ve seen countless athletes being banned for using testosterone to better performance. This means that as a result of their former biological state, it feels sensible to have trans woman athletes undergo some form of hormone alteration to level the playing field.

However, like every good ethics conundrum, there is another side to the story. In 2016, a number of academics carried out an evaluation of the capabilities of transgender athletes. The paper reviewed eight research articles and 31 sport policies regarding transgender athletes and according to the findings, there is no evidence to prove trans woman athletes have an advantage. So, after all that, what is the answer? Who bloody knows. For me, it boils down to what the IOC classifies as a woman. Is it based on what dangles between the thighs or what you feel inside?

Personally, I don’t think anyone has the right to say to a transgender female that she is not a real woman. The world is changing and gender based on anatomy alone is becoming an outdated class system. Sport is just the latest in a long line of industries that has had to grapple with the notion that gender isn’t binary. And at the end of the day, what can you do about it? So for all the moaners and groaners out there, it’s time to man up and grow some balls, because that’s probably the only way you’re going to beat these transgender athletes. Shit, I think I just stepped on one of the landmines. Ah well, what did you expect?

“...male-to-female athletes must undergo hormone therapy to be eligible for an Olympic Games.”

Opinion | 35

Mum’s the Word:

Millennial Mums

What are Millennial Mums?

There’s a bit of debate regarding what constitutes a ‘millennial’, but most people agree that it refers to people who were born between the mid-80s and late-90s. This includes anyone who grew up in the 90s, and first decade of the new millennium (if you remember Y2K then you’re a millennial). Of course, the women born in this era are now at the ‘baby-making’ age, thus the term ‘millennial mums’ was born.

The distinction to make here is that millennial mums were born on the cusp of technological advancement. Our childhoods were spent playing in the street, spinning chatter rings, and making calls on party lines. Children born after this time don’t remember a time before Angry Birds existed, or before they could call anyone, at any time on their mobile. Millennials discovered modern technology as it was developing. We are the generation that was raised without technology, but lucky enough to use it as adults.

What’s Different About Millennial Mums?

Statistics show that over 20 per cent of mothers are millennial mums, making us over one fifth of the mothers currently parenting, and our parenting styles, are markedly different from the generation before.

Millennial mums know how it’s done. We are the most diverse, educated, and creative generation of mothers to grace the earth.

Not only are we smashing it at university, we are juggling work, relationships, and creating a warm, loving, relaxed environment for our children. In short, we are making history.

Here’s just some of the things that make millennial mums, the shit: • We have the smarts Millennial mums are smart. Statistics indicate that millennials in general are much more educated than the previous generations, making us the most educated generation of women yet. Many millennial mums have earned degrees before having their children, while many of us push through while we are parenting. Research

also shows that women are now outranking men in higher education, indicating that we are packing the brain power, and we aren’t afraid to use it.

• We utilise technology Being the first generation with internet access, millennial mums have adopted technology and are running with it. We are highly connected and rely heavily on our smart phones and laptops to do everything including ordering our groceries, planning our kids’ birthday parties, managing our finances, finding recipes for dinner, and getting parenting advice. Mothers who want to juggle things even turn to technology to work – creating online businesses, blogs, or freelancing from home.

• We Juggle Juggling is the hallmark of millennial mums. Fifty years ago, the path to domesticated life was mapped out for women: school, love, marriage, children. Millennial mums are shifting what it means to be a mum. Millennial mums have no interest in being kept barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. We study, we work, we parent – we want to have it all, and we make it happen. We work hard to achieve our goals and pursue our other interests. We love being mums, but we also love being us.

The Wonder Women of our time Millennial mothers account for a large portion of current, and up and coming, mothers so we have a big impact on our generation, and the next. Millennial mums are not only radically changing what it means to be a mother in the 21st century, but are also raising a new generation of children who will be the products of our new parenting style. We are the Wonder Women of our time, but remember – with great power, comes great responsibility.

36 | Humour

Humour | 37

Dilemma Doctor Since real life doctors are expensive, sometimes it pays to take the advice of more ‘alternative’ practices. Bring your problems, not your apples, and the Dilemma Doctor will prescribe you some terrible advice. Whether you take it or not is up to you, but always know the Doctor has your best interests at heart, even if he does hold a questionable MD.

Dear Doctor, I’ve been struck down with all sorts of illnesses recently, and I suspect it has something to do with the amount of cheap liquor I consume. I know how bad the cheap stuff is for you, but even with my work and allowance I can’t afford the higher end booze. I feel like I’m destroying my liver, but my circle of friends are hardcore drinkers and I don’t want to give up the lit life. Are there any life hacks that could help me?

Turnt Terri Getting on the piss is the most important thing in life and you should never let that go. Better an alcoholic and flying than sober and crying. However, it is true that $8 wines and $20 spirits are a little rough, but it could easily be due to the sugar or other industrial ingredients. Besides, Top shelf booze isn’t much better.

They’re both poisonous, so why bother forking out your dosh for some bullshit label? I think it’s safe to say that you can blame your liver quiver on the hardcore drinking itself, not the type. Take my advice, the next time you worry about this sort of thing just wash those thoughts away with more booze. Your generation’s future is fucked anyway, so there’s no point in experiencing it while not in a drunken stupor.

Dear Doctor, I started uni this year, alongside a close-knit group of buddies. We went to high school together, had League of Legends championships, Anime Marathons, and Live Action Role Playing sleepovers. But now that I’m 18, away from home, and socialising so much more, I’ve come across another group of friends. They’re the sort of party-goers that I kinda wished I had the chance to be a part of when I was younger. By befriending them I have a chance to go to parties, get drunk, and maybe even get a girlfriend. None of them are into any of the things that my buddies are into, and the groups will never mix. Do I stick with my old friends, or do I pursue the social life I’ve always dreamed of?

Repressed Reeve I’m going to answer your question in the form of a moral story, which was first told by some lad with a beard a couple thousand years ago. A father had two sons. The younger son asks his father for his share of the inheritance early, to which the father obliged.

The younger son then fucks off and spends his days getting lit until it runs out, just as a famine hits the land. The son works in a pig sty, desperately hungry, until he decides ‘fuck this’ and returns home.

He apologizes to his father, who embraces him and decides to hold a feast. The older son is super minced about this, and accuses his father of favouritism. The father replies that the younger son has returned, he was dead, and is alive again. He was lost, and is found.

The moral of the story is that going around telling parables to people will get you nailed to a tree. Oh, and you’re not responsible for your high school lads, get out there and have some fun.

Dear Doctor, My brother and I are both doing a three-year degree, currently in our second year, and it has always been our plan to finish our degrees at the same time and then travel overseas to France and start living there. We’ve prepared for it for years, we’ve both had French lessons, and saved up money, and we have to go at the same time after we graduate since our parents are going to sell the house and move to Australia next year. Enter me, a colossal fuck up. I’ve failed one of my papers, and they don’t offer it in Semester 2, Summer School, or Distance, and I need it to complete my degree. But I can’t be responsible for fucking everything up, I can’t stay behind to finish it, and I need it before we go to France.

Any ideas?

Catastrophic Casey Well you’ve fucked yourself into a corner, but all corners are escapable if you know parkour. Do you know parkour, Casey? If yes, bounce your ass outta there and triple backflip into the XTREME GRAVITY French Parkour Championship. If not, then you may have to ditch the degree and enrol in a similar one alongside a part time job in the land of croissants (is that what people call it, or am I being blatantly racist?). It’s a tough gig, I admit that, but you’re not the only one that this happens to. Many students are forced to abandon their degrees, sometimes temporary, sometimes not, due to failing a paper and not being able to finish their degree in the allotted time that they have for whatever reason. Most of them end up unemployed and homeless, turning to prostitution and petty theft. They become drug addicts, and quickly devolve into a hopelessly depressed state of mind as they think about the opportunities they wasted, and their bleak existence until eventually they’re chucked in prison or a cemetery. Nah I’m kidding, not finishing a degree isn’t the end of the world, there’s so much available that it’s almost as if university is a scam created by rich old men.

DISCLAIMER: Although the Dilemma Doctor has your very best interests in heart please keep in mind he is no expert. If you are after serious advice, please consult a professional.

38 | Feature Creative Writing

Modern Miss Lonelyhearts Being a student in my 20-somethings, I’m more or less knee deep in the sea (or pond, rather) of Wellington’s modern hookup culture. Perpetually perfecting the art of writing the ideally crafted response to a text, appearing just interested enough while remaining a little mysterious and aloof. Taking the appropriate five seconds or so to adequately judge a person’s tinder profile, determining whether or not give them the golden ticket ‘right-swipe’.

It seems that this is the world you and I live in right now, and I have to confess: I hate it with every fibre of my being.

Perhaps it’s because I’ve let too many time-wasters occupy my mental space far past their expiry date. Perhaps it’s because I have an unjust sense of entitlement when it comes to what the (dating) world owes me. Or perhaps our modern dating scene is, for the most part, just horrendously fucked up. It’s probably a combination of all three, but in the interest of, well, maintaining your interest, let’s just delve into that third observation.

While in a relationship, like all loved-up individuals do, I patiently listened to others complain about the trials and tribulations of the single life. Stories from my friends, anything popular on television, articles from Vice, Buzzfeed or whatever else endlessly clogs up your newsfeed. It’s everywhere. But it wasn’t until I began to experience it for myself that I finally remembered how it felt.

Everything, (and I sincerely mean, everything) – is so damn complicated. What happened to dates? Rather, there’s the ever elusive “let’s just hang out some time” – so after you do, you can spend the next three days that you’re supposed to be ignoring them wondering exactly what it meant. Did you see a film? Grab a coffee? Have sex in their car? Be careful; you guys were just hanging out.

‘It was just casual, right? I don’t know. What does car sex mean now?’

There’s a simple solution for those of us who struggle with haunting questions of that nature – just ask the other person. Seems pretty straightforward.

But wait, apparently, you can’t!

Never ask to hang out two nights in a row. If you initiated the last conversation, it’s their turn to text you first – no matter how long it takes. You can’t assume anything is more than casual, even when you willingly exchange bodily fluids on a regular basis. Oh, and wait, you can’t talk about it either.

We’re trapped in a dating world where people seem terrified of expressing anything genuine, at least, not without having followed the obligatory month or two of emotional side stepping.

If you’re interested in someone, heaven forbid you tell them how you feel; rather, act subtly interested enough for them to (hopefully) pick up on it, but not enough to ‘freak them out’.

We calculate it all to appear thoughtless. Oh, the irony – when in actual fact, it’s anything but. I could earn my masters degree with the amount of time and energy it takes to whether or not my casual hookup actually has a capacity to feel anything for me.

Don’t like that system? Too bad. It’s all a big game with more rules than you can count. If you can’t play, along you lose. That’s it – time to resign yourself to a life of drowning alone in a pile of cats, chocolate and tears.

Admittedly, that sounds pretty tempting at this point.

Why can’t we call someone because I like talking to them? Why is saying you have “a thing” going on with someone more acceptable than just admitting you’re dating them? Are we really still in high school?

If I get angry when I’m met with unsolicited cat calls, or upset when a person stands me up, I’m just a crazy bitch – leaving few options other than to complain to my friends and wade in anxiety until finally a text response appears. And let me tell you something; I don’t want to be that girl. None of us do. ‘That girl’ doesn’t, or shouldn’t, exist – she’s a single faceted, achingly demure, stripped down concept – because us women are all destined to spend our single days waiting patiently by the phone, right?

No one should have that kind of power over anyone. Least of all a broke, stressed student with a million more important things to spend their time worrying about.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am clearly not exempt from this exhausting phenomenon. In fact, I’ve bought right into it for years now.

But here’s my proposal: let’s all try being a little more weary of how, and why, we’re treating our potential suitors the way we do. Or more importantly, how we’re treating ourselves. If someone in your life makes you happy, why not tell them? If you’re not interested in someone, please, lord, just fucking tell them. Let’s do away with the idea that ignoring people until they disappear is an acceptable way of treating another human being. It’s time we stop leaving people hanging with unanswered texts and cryptic social media posts.

Give yourself a chance to be open, honest and genuine.

We’re all just trying to stumble our way through this messy dating world – don’t get so lost in playing the game that you forget to extend the same courtesy to yourself.

Join Massive’s own agony aunt, as she dissects the peaks and pitfalls of dating in a millennial world.

Feature | 39

40 | Culture with Paul Berrington

At the Movies: Our Picks The Trip to Spain (2017): Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon reunite with director Michael Winterbottom for this latest food odyssey. Expect the razor sharp wit of the previous films as two of the UK’s most acclaimed comedians give each other grief for an hour and half.

Dunkirk (2017) Director: Christopher Nolan

Starring: Aneurin Barnard, Barry Keoghan, Damien Bonnard, Fionn Whitehead, Harry Styles, James Bloor, Lee Armstrong, Mark Rylance, Tom Glynn-Carney, Tom Hardy

4/5

My Cousin Rachel (2017): Based on the novel by Daphne du Maurier, this dark tale of passion and revenge features a fantastic performance from Rachel Weisz, whose endearing charms may just hide a far darker character.

The Big Sick (2017): Billed by some critics as the romcom of the decade, this film tells the true story of Pakistan-born comedian Kumail who connects with grad student Emily after one of his stand-up sets, their relationship surprising not only themselves but their extended families.

Atomic Blonde (2017): Charlize Theron stars as the blonde of the title in this update of James Bond, an ass kicking MI6 agent who is given an impossible mission during the fall of the Soviet Union. From the makers of John Wick, this is stylish high energy entertainment.

Christopher Nolan’s gigantic movies have often come with their fair share of philosophical baggage. Think of the final act of Interstellar, or the plot holes within Inception, heavy handed ideas that in hindsight don’t really hold up to general criticism. Thankfully Dunkirk is a far more straightforward piece of storytelling, an almost completely immersive action film that delivers the spectacular set pieces Nolan has become famous for, yet never gets ahead of itself in terms of providing meaningful reasons why true life events took place.

This is a film that’s all about the ‘how’?

1940, and with the Nazi invasion of France leaving thousands of allied soldiers stranded on the beaches of Dunkirk, a mass evacuation is planned. But the enemy also see it as a chance to inflict as much damage as possible. Things are so desperate in fact, that even civilian boats will be used to rescue men trapped on the other side of the channel. As German planes strafe men trapped on the beaches, and the allies fight back through their own means, this incredible World War II story is brought to life in a truly visceral and cinematic style.

Using three different story strains, land, air, and sea, Nolan literally takes us along for the ride. Whether a soldier stranded against hopeless odds on the beach, a fighter pilot involved in elaborate dogfights, or a civilian sea captain facing the might of the Luftwaffe, we feel their every action with vivid precision.

Never has a film taken the viewer this far inside the action, and the result is more akin to survival than war movie.

An impressive cast are almost secondary, yet appearances from the likes of Tom Hardy, Mark Rylance, Cillian Murphy give the film a heavyweight feel, adding the overall effect of witnessing something truly epic. And yes, Harry Styles is fine, in fact he is a standout amongst the younger, lesser known actors within the cast.

Overall though, this is Nolan’s film, the technical achievements incredible as they are, are wrangled together with a huge amount of skill and energy. We’ve seen this sort of thing before in his movies, but never has it been quite as spectacular a thrill ride as this best trilogies of recent times. While not without its flaws, here is a film that much like its predecessors, is richly detailed enough to get better with age. A rollercoaster ride with a heart constantly pumping beneath its slick surface.

Classic Film:

Pulp Fiction (1994) Quentin Tarantino had already made the critically acclaimed cult film Reservoir Dogs before Pulp Fiction was released , but it was with this brilliant reinvention of the crime caper that he established his formidable reputation as a unique storyteller.

Written with good friend Roger Avary, Pulp Fiction creates a sub-genre itself, detailing the lives of several misfits, contract killers, prize fighters, and femme fatales over seven non-chronological chapters, their stories linked by bad choices and crimes that are likely to catch up with them.

Full of superb dialogue, and iconic turns from the likes of John Travolta and Uma Thurman, many have tried and failed to replicate this masterpiece. Pulp Fiction is a hardboiled classic that reads just like the detective comics the story is influenced by.

Culture with Paul Berrington | 41

TV Streaming: Game of thrones – Season 7 The final season of the most popular show on the planet has given us more in terms of plot over the first three episodes than it has done since the infamous Red Wedding in Season three. Battles have been won and lost, key figures have made new pacts, and the narrative is hurtling towards a phenomenal final act.

Take it all too seriously and Game of Thrones is likely to disappoint, the operatic action and outwardly sadistic politics are a bit like Lord of the Rings on acid, lots of acid. Yet indulge in its silliness and you’re likely to be hooked in no time.

Spectacular effects have become the norm over the last couple of seasons, but on the evidence of what we’ve seen so far over the first three episodes of this final act, there’s some truly epic scenes to come. Now moving beyond the original source (George R. R. Martin’s novels are still to be finished by the author), the silly dialogue and occasionally goofy cameos (did we really need to see more of Ed Sheeran) occasionally grate, but few television shows

offer this level of entertainment, and for many of us there’s nothing better than a Monday night on the couch munching junk food and trying to guess what happens next.

With only a handful of episodes left, there’s so much happening it’s an exciting time for fans, and for those very few of you out there who haven’t been bitten by the bug, what better time to indulge in a bit of binge watching to catch up before it all ends.

Music: Our Recommendations

Micronism – Inside a Quiet Mind (Loop Recordings) Remastered and re-released, this masterpiece of New Zealand techno seems more relevant than ever. First available in 1998, the current trend towards throwback techno and house music gives this beautifully sculpted record a new lease of life. For producer Denver McCarthy, who had already released several records under the alias Mechanism, Inside a Quiet Mind marked a departure from the hardcore intensity of his earlier works, offering something more ethereal and elegant.

Showing the influence of both Berlin-based Basic Channel, and the synth heavy Detroit sound, this is a welcome release that all New Zealand music fans should own a copy of, and is also available on vinyl right now.

Tyler the Creator – Flower Boy (Columbia) A polarising figure whose real character has always been hard to identify, we’ve often had the feeling Tyler the Creator isn’t quite as easy to define as his detractors have suggested. Billed as the king of shock rap, there was no doubting Tyler’s skills, but his sexist and homophobic lyrics often grated and isolated audiences, a rebel whose true cause seemed totally pointless. While you’re still unlikely to put this on while your Mum visits, Flower Boy suggests a maturing artist with different things on his mind. More laid back and indeed, more philosophical, here’s a record that shows maturity and reflection. Not that Tyler’s razor sharp wit is lost, it’s simply the sound of a young man growing up and delivering arguably his best work to date.

In a rap world full of fake gangsters and over promoted superstars, Flower Boy is surprisingly refreshing work, well worth it.

Dizzee Rascal – Raskit (Dirtee Stank) An artist whose early work remains profoundly inspirational and stunningly inventive, and whose steps into the commerciality almost made him a forgotten man, Dizzee Rascal is now riding a resurgence of interest in grime music throughout the world. Raskit may not quite have the wonderfully raw energy that made Boy in Da Corner such a brilliant debut, but it goes a long way to right the wrongs displayed on 2013’s The Fifth (a Robbie Williams collaboration FFS). While you’d struggle to frame the album as a true return to his grime roots, the pop choruses are largely gone, and Dizzee sounds formidable and inspired by this new direction.

42 | Column

Bitchin’ Kitchen with Hannah Colenbrander

Udon Noodle Salad Turn your unhealthy bowl of two-minute microwave noodles into a 10-minute gourmet noodle masterpiece. Instead of ingesting all that MSG, opt for carrots, cucumber, spring onions and herbs. This noodle salad is fresh and ready pretty quick, perfect for uni lunches when you’ve got no more money left for buying your lunches.

Method:

Ingredients:

Cook noodles according to packet instructions, then drain and rinse under cold water to remove access starch. Place in a mixing bowl with all other ingredients and toss to combine. Prepare dressing.

You will need:

250g dry udon noodles 2 large carrots, finely shredded 7 cm of cucumber, finely shredded 2 spring onions, finely shredded 2 handfuls of coriander leaves

1/4 cup fish sauce, 1/4 cup sugar, 1/4 cup white vinegar, 3/4 cup water, 1 long red chilli; finely sliced, Finely grated zest of one lime.

2 handfuls of basil or mint leaves

Shake all ingredients together and mix half the dressing in with udon noodles.

Note: Dressing can be stored in fridge for up to a week.

1/2 recipe Vietnamese dressing

1 lime, finely sliced

Booked In: Chapter Nine: Death of the reader I have a confession to make.

So far this year, I’ve only read 12 books. That’s okay, I guess, but for a self-proclaimed bibliophile, lover of literature, and someone who literally writes a column about books, it’s pretty bloody weak. Far from the avid and constant reader I’ve been pretending to be, my reading habits are anything but routine.

Being that I do want to be everything I just mentioned, I’m a bit embarrassed about it.

Part of the reason for this is because it feels like I’m contributing to a much larger issue which I’m otherwise pretty passionate about solving (despite there being no clear-cut solution).

The New Zealand Book Council’s most recent survey found that in 2016, around 394,000 New Zealand adults didn’t even start reading a book. Of those who do read, of course, Kiwi adults read an average of 20.6 books per year—which is pretty good! Lower than my own personal average, of course, so I already feel a little better about myself.

I think those 394,000 non-readers’ reasons for not picking up a book last year might be very similar to why my own reading habits are so inconsistent.

In a word: modernity. Television shows, video games, movies, social media—the internet. All of these recently assimilated forms of entertainment seem much less effort than sitting down with a book—and why? Primarily, I think, because they can mostly be accessed from the same place. Your computer, laptop, tablet, phone. Not to say that books can’t (I’ve already discussed e-books at length, you might recall), but since a computer monitor puts more strain on the eyes than the printed page, you’re likely to tire

much more easily, and switch out the literature for your internet browser much sooner.

Now, I’m not complaining about technology. You’ll never catch me complaining about technology. That would make me a hypocrite, since I can’t live without it. It’s just difficult to examine the reasons why some people don’t read books without looking to the obvious answer, which is technology. Yes, yes, whatever—you can make an argument for a shortage of free time, but somehow people always seem to have time for Netflix. Reading a book is a higher involvement activity, and is therefore seen as requiring more effort.

Which makes sense… until you think about it. Arguably, we read more than ever. Most of everything on the internet involves some form of reading—social media posts, news articles, YouTube comments. Of the 394,000 non-reading Kiwis, 31 per cent claimed to not enjoy reading. Well, they must really hate modern daily life, saturated as it is with the written word—even road signs, for goodness sake! Nutritional information tables! Menus! This magazine?!

The only conclusion that can really be made is that there is no ready conclusion. I could go into detail about the various benefits of regularly reading books. I could tell you about bibliotherapy, which offers books as prescriptions for your emotional issues. I could explain how some of the most successful people in the world (such as Bill Gates, Elon Musk, and Oprah Winfrey) are voracious readers.

If you’re a reader, keep reading. If not, maybe… give it a go?

Please? Personally, I’m going to try read at least a little every day from now on, if only to not feel quite so inadequate when comparing myself to aforementioned rich, successful, and powerful people.

Review | 43

CHECK OUT MASSIVE'S BRAND NEW WEBSITE!

Spotlight – Daniel Voss

www.massivemagazine. org.nz You can now read the magazine on

Answers: 1. Rick’s hair colour 2. Morty’s eye direction 3. Morty’s t-shirt colour 4. One-eyed monster’s eye colour 5. Two-eyed monster’s eye colour 6. Rick’s eye colour 7. Rick’s pants

Spot the difference 4 3

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Medium

Sudoku

Puzzles 44 | Puzzles

Puzzles | 45

Maze Help Tom find Jerry!

Connect the Dots

Target

P P O D O S U R N

Make as many words as you can using as few or as many letters as you can.

Each word must use the letter in the centre, but you can't use a letter/square more than once.

Good: 20 words

Great: 50 words

Impressive: 76 words

46 | Events

Albany Events August 15 – August 29

Tuesday, August 15

Thursday, August 24

The Pickle King

Sci-Fi Spectacular

Q Theatre, $30

MOTAT (Museum of Transport and Technology), $10

Want to have a laugh at someone’s pickle? Well, go see the comedy show the pickle king. A comedy about love, death, and preserves… It’s freaking hilarious and it will have you in tears by the end of the night. If you are a pickle king or know of a pickle king yourself take them along to this show. It will not disappoint, and who knows, maybe your pickle will be tickled at the end of the night.

Now that’s what I’m Tolkien about! Calling all film buffs and science fiction lovers! Come together for food, fun and films, and experience a series of iconic sci-fi movies in MOTAT’s premiere innovation space, The Idea Collective. Get your Sci-Fi fix for the week and then you’ll live long and prosper.

Bitchin’ Bingo

Friday, August 25

Little Easy, Free

It’s Showtime Magic and Illusion Spectacular

Once a month Mistress Viv from Bitchin’ Bingo spins the balls in Ponsonby! Join her and DJ Andy Juice for this uniquely kiwi night out. Plenty of prizes up for grabs including some naughty ones!

Free to play. Get a crew together and contact Little Easy direct to book your table. Come early for some of their famous burgers. It will be a bitchin’ time. Grab life by the balls.

Hellenville War Memorial Hall, $20

Friday, August 18

I’ve got the magic in me…. Every time I touch that paper it turns into B’s… Okay, your magic isn’t that great and you can’t turn that C into an A, but fear not. It’s Showtime Magic and Illusion Spectacular will ‘magically’ help you forget about your bad grades, uni problems, and your diet of two minute noodles. This is not an illusion! Go see the show!

Grand Tour of the Solar System

Saturday, August 26

Stardome Observatory and Planetarium, $12

ASA Ball Martime By Moonlight

Got a date with a person that you really fancy? Well ask them if they want to see Ur-anus… and accompany you to the grand tour of the Solar System. This is the perfect time to ask your date if their dad was a thief because he took the stars and put it in your eyes. OR do you work for NASA because you are out of this world.

Seriously, this is a perfect first date. Trust me… I’ve been on many.

For more info visit www.stardome.org.nz

Tuesday, August 22 Rock the dome & Zed Zeppelin Stardome Observatory and Planetarium, $35 Baby you light up my world like nobody else…. Screw that, let Rock the Dome and Zed Zeppelin light up your world. Sit back and revel in the surround sound with psychedelic images projected on the dome ceiling, to go along with the music. The ticket includes two glasses of wine and nibbles. It’s gonna be… LIT

$85 Earlybird, $90 Second release, $100 Final release It’s that time of years. Ladies, fellas, time to get your dance on. The ball is a time where you clean up and look like you haven’t been living off two minute noodles for the past six months, and dance all your problems away… for a night at least. So, wipe off that zombie look off your face, pretend not to cry while buying a ticket, and get ready for a fucking good night. For more info check out the Albany Students’ Association website.

Credits | 47

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