Issue 10
2017
Wellington
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POLITICS • Party Policies – A breakdown before the election •
•An interview with Jacinda Ardern • The lowdown on student executives for 2018 •
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Whooo’s
almost in Town
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SHAVE LEGS WEAR JEANS
4| PRESS COUNCIL Massive Magazine is registered under the New Zealand Press Council which allows you as our reader to reach out to an independent forum for resolving complaints you may have. DISCLAIMER The views, beliefs and opinions reflected in the pages of Massive Magazine do not necessarily represent those of Massey University, its staff, Albany Students’ Association (ASA), Massey University Students’ Association (MUSA), Massey at Wellington Students’ Association (MAWSA), Extramural Students’ Society, or the Massive editor. MAWSA is an independent organisation that publishes Massive. Send any queries or complaints directly to Massive at editor@massivemagazine.org.nz. Massive is subject to the New Zealand Press Council. If a complainant is not satisfied with the response from Massive, the complaint may be referred to the Press Council: info@presscouncil.org.nz or online via presscouncil.org.nz
Features
News 08 Local News
10 Do students hold the key? 13 Everything you need to know: The 2017 General Election 20 Student Political Survey
09 World and National News
Regulars 06 Editorial
23 Artist Feature: Hendrix Arnold
16 Giveaways
26 Let's talk about voting
38 Booked In / Bitchin’ Kitchen
28 Breaking the silence... and David Seymour
40 Culture with Paul Berrington
42 Student Elections
Interviews 12 Behind the scenes with On The Fence
Opinion 17 A Pinch of Politics
19 Interview: Jacinda Ardern
34 The Yarns from Pitch Five
32 Interview: Jan Thomas
35 Mum’s the Word
Humour 30 Modern Miss Lonelyhearts
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36 The Dilemma Doctor
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Editorial Kia ora,
Hi everyone,
Welcome back to the start of the second half of semester two. Only six weeks left of classes to go and two issues left of Massive Magazine for the year.
You know that friend who is pretty quiet and predictable, yet once they get drunk they are the most spontaneous and captivating person? Yes? Well that’s been the lead up to this general election so far.
Welcome to our ‘Politics’ issue, where we hope to make things easier for you when it comes to voting in not only just the General Election, but student elections as well. It’s a double whammy!
Nine months since John Key resigned and there have been massive power shifts and a new surge of public interaction. First Turei, then Little, and now Dunne. It almost feels like a waiting game for who is going to be toppled by the political vodka next.
On pages 13 to 15 we have done our very best to sum up party policies for you - so you can make an informed decision on election day. We also have an interview with Labour’s new leader Jacinda Ardern on page 19. If you head to the back section of the magazine you will see profiles of all the students running for 2018 executive positions. It’s a great way to get an idea of what some of the candidates have to offer! Having the opportunity to vote is a real privilege. As corny as it sounds, every vote does make a difference! This edition has been a real pleasure to put together - I hope everyone enjoys it! Until next time, Nikki
Something that politics and alcohol have in common is that they affect people, without fail. Some people will have a higher tolerance towards either of these things, but when it comes down to it, both have an extreme impact on how we live our lives. Whether it be for those drunken six hours or a painful three years. With Jacinda Ardern, James Shaw and Bill English going head-to-head in a very fiery and volatile election, only the actual voting booths will let us know who the true winner is. Often people hype up the ‘polls’ before an election and although they are good indicators, one also has to take that information with a grain of salt. For the margarita, of course. This is because the people who responded to those polls cannot account for the thousands of New Zealanders who decide their political position on voting day. Politics, specifically Kiwi politics, has been an amazingly huge part of my life for many years and is the driving force behind me studying Journalism. Remember to stay informed and self-aware, but mostly remember to vote! Your voice matters. Natasha
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Local News | 7
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8 | Local News
Wellington first city to implement a voluntary rental WOF for houses By Nikki Papatsoumas The Wellington City Council has launched a voluntary ‘warrant of fitness’ scheme for rental properties in the capital. Last month the Wellington City Council partnered with the University of Otago, Wellington, to launch the scheme in an effort to set minimum housing standards for rental properties in Wellington. Landlords can now book a rental warrant of fitness inspection on the Wellington City Council’s website. From here, qualified building inspectors will carry out an assessment of the property and landlord’s properties will receive a pass or fail on the spot. The assessment, which is made up of a number of different criteria, costs the landlord $250 and lasts for three years. Mayor of Wellington, Justin Lester, says the council wants to lift rental standards in the capital and make better accommodation available for people. He says it is something landlords can choose to be involved in to show they are responsible landlords to potential tenants. “Every Wellingtonian deserves a warm, dry home,” he says. “We’re partnering with the university and will be launching an app that will allow tenants and landlords to check their house against minimum health standards designed by experts, and allow landlords to request a full inspection by a professional to be certified as meeting the standard. “This will give landlords the chance to promote their house as being warm and dry, and give prospective renters an assurance the home they are looking to live in meets the standard. “All available analysis strongly indicates that improved quality of housing leads to improving health, social and financial outcomes.” Deputy Mayor Paul Eagle says improving the quality of the housing stock was a key goal for the council. “This is just the start – through our Long Term Plan we will be introducing a Wellington Housing Quality Standard that will
Wellington now has a rental property WOF procedure.
incorporate both personal health and earthquake resilience, and be tailored to Wellington’s needs,” Eagle says. “Information from this voluntary scheme will help inform the permanent standard council introduces.”
Massive Magazine website blocked by Victoria University network By Kasharn Rao Massive Magazine’s website, massivemagazine.org, is inaccessible by Victoria University students due to a security policy. Attempting to access the website while using Victoria University WiFi results in a page block. The Massive Magazine website, which was released in April earlier this year after months of technical difficulties, is categorised by Victoria University as ‘Spyware / Malicious Sites’. One Massey student says Victoria University is censoring what its students read. “It’s hypocritical, seeing as Victoria pride themselves on asking questions and pushing boundaries [which is] literally the opposite of censorship.” Another Massey student says they can’t understand why the site would be blocked. “There is no provocation, controversy, or outrage that would
warrant Victoria students being blocked from reading Massive on campus. “I would certainly hope Massey has not blocked Victoria’s Salient newspaper.” Victoria’s student magazine website, salient.org, is easily accessible using Massey‘s WiFi connection. Dominic, a student at Victoria University, says he is not bothered the website is blocked. “I’m sure it’s people’s right to be able to read what they want to read but I don’t particularly think [Victoria] students will want to read the magazine of another university too much. Also, it is the university’s right to block something if they believe it to be malicious to someone.” There have been no reports of massivemagazine.org being blocked by other networks.
National News | 9
Labour party will increase student allowance by $50
Let’s get Quizzical
By Nikki Papatsoumas
1. Which singer joined Mel Gibson in the movie Mad Max: Beyond the Thunderdome? 2. On television, who did the character Lurch work for? 3. Which movie features the song ‘Happy’? 4. In which city was Anne Frank’s hiding place? 5. Who is the author of the famour Harry Potter books? 6. What does DVD stand for? 7. Who had 1990’s hit song ‘Bump N’ Grind’? 8. Which colour eyes do more humans have? 9. What female superstar has a daughter called Blue Ivy? 10. Which two poeple were told never to leave the Garden of Eden? 1. Tina Turner 2. Addams family 3. Despicable Me 4. Amsterdam 5. J K Rowling 6. Digital Versatile Disk 7. R Kelly 8. Brown 9. Beyonce 10. Adam and Eve
As momentum builds ahead of the 2017 General Election Labour has announced its latest policy and it’s aimed directly at students. If elected, the party has promised to offer one year of free post-secondary study to all first time tertiary students. As well as this it will boost student allowances and living cost loans by $50 a week. This is part of the party’s plan to offer three years free post-secondary study by 2024. Massey at Wellington Students’ Association (MAWSA) Education Vice President Emma Pearce thinks it’s great the party is catering for students and hopes it will encourage more students to vote later this month. “I’m surprised it hasn’t gone up sooner due to how expensive it is to live these days. If you look specifically to Wellington and Auckland with the price of rent, the current amount doesn’t even cover rent alone for students, I think it’s a positive change.” She says offering free tertiary study is good but it is of more benefit to secondary school leavers than current university students. “On the whole it’s awesome and it’s great to get people to try university but if they aren’t serious, it’s not fair to the rest of us, because the money has to come from somewhere.” The New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations (NZUSA) has welcomed the announcement and say it is great to see the party making a commitment to lifting student support. NZUSA President Jonathan Gee says tertiary education should be a right for all, not a privilege for a few. “Making tertiary-study more affordable for students, and their families, means that New Zealanders from lower socio-economic backgrounds are one step closer to experiencing the transformative power of education,” he says. “Students are telling us that they barely have enough to live on. Even with a part-time job students are struggling, and are forced to focus on economic survival rather than academic success.” He says for this reason, an extra $50 in allowances will be of great assistance to students. However, Gee suggests that more still needs to be done to improve the accessibility of tertiary study, and lifting the maximum that can be borrowed for living costs is only a shortterm solution. He says he would like to see more students able to access to the student allowance, which currently only 33 per cent of students are eligible for since the current Government froze the parental income threshold eligibility five years ago. “Increasing student loan borrowing might be a short-term solution to meeting basic needs, but it still leaves graduates with a significant amount of debt in the long-term. “As student loan debt reaches $16 billion, students and graduates are crying out for relief of this debt burden.”
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Pocket’s Picks: From around the Globe Americans enjoy eclipse Last month, Americans marvelled at a total solar eclipse - the first to be visible in America since 1979. The eclipse crossed the country from coast to coast. A solar eclipse is when the sun, moon and Earth line up - and the moon directly between the sun and the Earth - casts a shadow.
10 | Feature
Do students hold the key? By Jamie-Lee Bracken The elections are coming up and every vote counts. If this year’s election is anything like the last, it looks like parties won’t be able to count on the youth vote. Or will they? It will come as no surprise that 18 to 24 year old millennials are often labelled apathetic, lazy and uncaring, especially when it comes to voting. According to the Electoral Commission, the 2014 election saw only 62 per cent of this age bracket actually enrolled to vote. Only 212,204 youth actually turned up to have their say on polling day. But with the political world in disarray, it seems students are more engaged than ever. Campaigns such as the New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations We Have Power, and a raft of younger politicians such as Jacinda Ardern and Chloe Swarbrick, who connect with voters through social media, are causing students to finally prick their heads up and take notice. Could students have the power to change the government this election? The Design + Democracy Project was formed here at Massey University as a call to action, responding to declining voter turn out. This project created the popular online interactive tool On the Fence as a way for young and first time voters that were still undecided, to match their personal values with certain political parties. Project director, Karl Kane, says that its “irrefutable” that 18-24 year olds are the least engaged group, but it’s not fair or accurate to say that they are lazy and apathetic. Kane says more young people are engaged in politics today than they were in fifty years ago. He says the main difference today is the way youth go about politics. “They might not march, but will campaign for years online for a cause,” he says. He believes that a big issue lies within our antiquated system that is hard to engage with. “Imported from England and designed centuries ago, our parliament sees a red team compete with the blue team; Bloods and Crips, if you will. They are separated by a man with a mace, ffs! So we have a disconnect. But ironically we won’t be able to change the system until young people engage with it, in its current form. That is how our democracy works,” he says. Kane says millennials are more collaborative, deliberative and issues-orientated and that is the ethos needed in government. He says conversations about the collective future of youth are very worthwhile in getting students to advocate for their wider communities. “Every single effort made- from On The Fence to that conversation you had with your apathetic classmate- makes a real difference,” he says. Kane says that by students reaching out to their friends and whanau in trade and retail or anywhere they feel comfortable, then they will ensure every voter has their say. “Voting is a habit and cycles of mutual neglect form fast,” he says. So an students make a difference? Kane says students do hold the power to make a difference and can change politics here. “University students are most likely our future leaders,” he says. Bachelor of Communications student at Massey University in Wellington, Izzy Davis, also agrees that students can make a change but says that starts with voting. She says she finds it annoying being labelled as the generation that doesn’t care and doesn’t vote. Having never previously taken notice of politics, she has only recently started to take more interest. “I started to realise how important it is to understand and get a say in,” she says. Davis puts the poor youth voter turn-out down to students not having a decent understanding or the want to go out and learn
more like she has. Davis also thinks that many students think no matter who gets voted in, it will not affect them and that’s why they don’t engage as much. “I think a lot of the time students just don’t take interest, they don’t now whats going on therefore they don’t educate themselves and follow along with politics, so in the end they just don’t vote,” she says. What gets Davis most interested in politics is seeing what policies interest her and seeing what each party has to offer. She says that she would feel the most comfortable talking about this with a friend and people she knows, as sometimes things can get awkward if you disagree. Davis says that being lucky enough to have the right to vote and have a say and be heard should get students voting. “It’s important to vote so you can have a say in the future of New Zealand,” she says. Davis says students understanding politics will help get them to vote and hopes the On the Fence tool will help get youth turning out at the polling booths. “I think a lot of students are getting sick of the label that this generation doesn’t care and isn’t showing interest so a lot of people want to prove them wrong.” Like Davis, New Zealand Union of Students’ Association (NZUSA) President, Jonathan Gee, believes youth have the power to create political change. “Politics should be working better for us and issues we care about which aren’t addressed. We are powerful and mobilised for change,” says Gee. Gee believes the reason students don’t vote is because they’ve been left out of politics for far too long. “I question the narrative around apathy. I believe students do care, we just go about it in a different way,” he says. Gee says that politics doesn’t speak to the lived reality of what young people face, he believes there’s a disconnect that isn’t being considered. He says its important to create meaningful solutions to issues students care about otherwise they will stay unresolved. In response to this, the NZUSA have created the “We Have Power” campaign, spearheaded by Gee. After seeing campaigns overseas, the NZUSA have been inspired by these movements to build a grassroots campaign here in New Zealand. “Its about getting students and young people heard in a public and political arena about the solutions of our time.” To do this, over 100 volunteers across the country will be at each university campus over the next few weeks. They will organise events such as MP debates that will hopefully energise students at different campuses to get voting. “We are wanting to spread as far and wide as possible to get that communication and engagement,” he says. The campaign will also get volunteers to encourage people to sign up on Facebook and will make sure they are reminded through text, to vote. “[We are] basically going out in spaces where young people already are, those spaces where they’re most comfortable engaging in politics and we just want to leverage on that,” says Gee. Gee says research backs up meaningful face to face conversation being able to change voter turn out. He says he wants to change the way we do politics here in New Zealand and it’s possible with this campaign. “We need to have meaningful conversations in terms of politics for a world better for our generation.” This first time campaign wants to give students the power to convince the government to improve the lives of students, he says. “Once we do turn our and vote our voice will be heard.”
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12 | Interview
Behind the scenes with On the Fence
On The Fence is an online interactive tool that aims to boost voter participation – especially among students – in the upcoming general elections. The now renowned programme was developed by Massey University’s The Design+Democracy Project. Massive Magazine’s Natasha Tziakis sat down to chat with Research Officer for The Design+Democracy Project Kate Baxter ahead of this year’s general elections. So, what exactly is On The Fence and why should students care? So, On the Fence is an online tool, to show users which parties their values align with. How it works is that we asked the political parties to respond to a series of challenges, and the users do the same. we’ve had all of the parties respond to a set of questions and then the users respond to the same set of questions. And then we match them up. What initially prompted you to want to create this and what were the general feelings towards government at that time? On the Fence is made by The Design+Democracy Project which was formed in 2013 in response to the Electoral Commission calling upon research and academic communities to respond to declining voter participation. On the Fence originally started as a student project in 2014. Baz the Sheep is a cutie on the homepage, who’s idea was it to bring him to life? Well we had a sheep for the first On The Fence, he was our mascot. And Baz, this time around, is actually named after our last research officer, Tom Le Bass. Tom worked on Vote Local which is our tool for the local elections, and so he gets the sheep named after him. So, the next one will be named after me. It’s a cute little tradition. So, it’s like a legacy? Yes, well, it’s quite cool having Baz to talk for us sometimes. Some people will message the Facebook page and address it to Baz and I like coming up with sheep puns. How easy is it for people to use On The Fence and what are the benefits of using it ahead of the upcoming election? We have designed On The Fence primarily for usability, so it can be the easiest tool for people to use out there. There’s no barrier from entry, you don’t have to know very much at all about politics and that’s the whole idea; it’s entry level. It’s the first stop for people who don’t know anything about the election. The benefits are to
just start a conversation, that’s what it’s for. We just want people to start talking and make people aware that the election is even happening. The Design + Democracy Project is one of the main units behind this project, does it have any other socially minded initiatives that students could participate in? So, The Design+Democracy Project created Vote Local, for the local elections. There was Flag Post for the flag referendum. We had Ask Away and On The Fence for the last election and we are always working on stuff. So, if anyone is interested, then we are more than happy for you to approach us. We love having students involved. And they have actually been involved in nearly every step of the process this time around, from writing the questions to user testing. What would be your advice to students wanting to become more educated in how the New Zealand government works? I would start probably by talking to people. Because it’s really confusing just starting on your own. So use the resources around you and the most important thing is people. I came onto this project knowing very very little about politics. And over the past couple of months, I’ve learnt heaps just by being amongst it. And I’ve really noticed that this year, this election, my friends are talking about it more. It’s that whole ‘youthquake’ happening. Makes me hopeful. What do you think has been the most rewarding moment for you on this journey of creating and developing On The Fence? I don’t think I can pinpoint one specific moment but I’ve gained invaluable experiences from this whole process. From being encouraged to push myself into new scary spaces. I had to go on the radio last week and I did a piece for the news and for someone who is not comfortable with presentations or being in front of a camera or anything is terrifying. It’s been amazing. Were you interested in politics when you were at school/ university? If not, what changed that for you? No, not at all. So, I studied Design here at Massey and then I got this job. I had no understanding, well I had an interest in that I knew who I was going to vote for, but it wasn’t something that I actively participated in. Head to www.onthefence.co.nz to take the test
Feature | 13
Everything you need to know:
The 2017 General Election: By Natasha Tziakis More and more these days students are badgered and branded as apathetic when it comes to voting in the general elections. According to data released by the Electoral Commission, in the 2014 General Elections, 63 per cent of those enrolled to vote aged 18-24 actually voted.
anymore. We have got you covered. Below, we take a look at some of the main political parties and their policies for the upcoming 2017 General Election. Check it out, talk to your friends and prove you’re not apathetic, but attentive, when it comes to making a decision about who will run our country.
But why is there a lack or awareness or interest from students? At Massive Magazine we have heard students feel like policy and party politics is over their head, leading to a lack of interest. Not
Note: This is a BASIC guideline. For more detailed information on particular policies, check out the glossary on page 15.
Jobs National: Reduce tax on income under $52,000. Labour: Increase minimum wage to $16.50 per hour. Establish fair trial periods. End secondary tax in the way that the first job is taxed normally and the second job would be taxed on a flat rate. Green: Increase minimum wage to $17.75 and remove youth wage. NZ First: Raise the minimum wage to $20 per hour and introduce a new system of subsidising wages for employers who take on young, unemployed people for trade training and skills programmes. TOP: All income, including non-wage income such as income from property, to be taxed. ACT: Lower personal income tax. Māori Party: Introduce a living wage for all workers.
Students National: Increase the amount available to students through the accommodation benefit by $40-60. Labour: Progressively introduce three years of free tertiary education. Green: Work towards free education by reducing fee’s each year. Work towards universal allowance by decreasing the means testing threshold slowly. NZ First: Introduce a universal living allowance which is not subject to parent means testing as a priority for all full-time students. TOP: Introduce a universal basic income for 18-23 to help ease the burden of everyday costs. ACT: Increase student living cost limit by $40. Māori Party: Introduce free public transport for students at all levels.
14 | Feature
Health National: Increase health funding by $3.9 billion over 4 years. Labour: Increase funding by $8 billion. Decrease all doctor costs by $10 until a review of best way to match cost to income is undertaken. Green: Increase health funding, and increase free GP visits until you are 18. NZ First: Introduce the Teen Health Check Bill – this would require DHBs to undertake health checks on all year 9 students, alongside other measures. Provide additional resourcing for child and youth mental health services. TOP: Legalise cannabis and have licensed suppliers and manufacturers to encourage small scale regional supply, and regulate the potency of supply. TOP would then use the revenue generated by the tax and profits for community programmes. ACT: Make contraception more available to those who need it. Continue to advocate state support for people with physical or mental conditions who require support, including improved access to supported living arrangements for those with serious mental illness. Māori Party: Remove GST from fresh fruit, fresh vegetables and milk.
Education National: Invest in building new schools and classrooms nationwide. Roll out fast unlimited broadband to schools so they become more connected. Invest $10.8 billion a year into early childhood, primary and secondary school education. Labour: Invest an extra $4 billion dollars over four years to deliver a modern education system, funded by the money saved by cancelling National’s proposed tax cuts. Green: Commit to create a comprehensive plan to teach Te Reo Maori in schools – making it more important in the education system. NZ First: Abolish National Standards in their current form and work with the sector to establish robust assessment measures for individual students. TOP: Invest in early childhood education and aim to deliver free fulltime early childhood education with a focus on improving quality in poorer areas. ACT: Remove the funding cap and increase per-student funding for independent schools Māori Party: Implement a universal student allowance with cost of living adjustment to guarantee a livable income during study, for all tertiary students, including post-graduate students.
Environment National: By 2030, reduce carbon emissions to 30 per cent less than the 2005 levels, improve Emissions Trading Scheme, Increase DOC funding to $10 million. Labour: Increase ETS so that it covers all sectors, charge for large commercial use of fresh water. Green: Carbon neutral by 2050, replace ETC with carbon tax, 100 per cent renewable energy by 2030. NZ First: Seek higher Crown levies on minerals extracted, then return 25 per cent royalties to the source regions. Develop plans and procedures to handle waste water in rural areas. TOP: 100 per cent renewable electricity by 2035, reform ETS. ACT: Sell Landcorp and put the proceeds into a sanctuary trust for people who wish to operate inland sanctuaries for native wildlife. Māori Party: Protect freshwater and give it the status of tāonga (treasure). Make the freshwater standard drinkable.
15
Housing National: Continue current policies and build 5,200 new social houses in Auckland. Labour: Require all homes to meet quality standards, build 100,000 homes for sale to new home owners, stop sale of state homes, build 1000 new state homes a year until demand met. Green: Introduce WOF for rentals. NZ First: Provide government assistance for first home buyers. TOP: Expand the supply of social and affordable rental housing provided by not-for-profit organisations. ACT: Remove New Zealand’s large cities from the Resource Management Act, and create separate urban development legislation, prioritising land supply and reducing red tape on developers. MÄ ori Party: 90,000 affordable houses by 2022 (60,000 in Auckland and 30,000 in other areas where there is severe housing deprivation).
Glossary Jobs:
Education:
https://www.national.org.nz/family_ incomes_package
https://www.national.org.nz/a_better_ education_for_our_children
http://www.labour.org.nz/ workplacerelations
http://www.labour.org.nz/education
http://www.labour.org.nz/secondarytax
https://www.greens.org.nz/policy/fairersociety/te-reo-m%C4%81ori-schools
https://www.greens.org.nz/policy/fairersociety/budget-all-mothers
http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/education
http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/labour_and_ employment
http://act.org.nz/education/
http://www.top.org.nz/top1 http://act.org.nz/economy/ http://www.maoriparty.org/fairer_ aotearoa_policy_2017 Student funding: http://www.labour.org.nz/education https://www.greens.org.nz/policy/fairersociety/faster-into-homes http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/social_ development http://www.top.org.nz/top7 http://www.maoriparty.org/youth_ policy_2017 Health: https://www.national.org.nz/better_ healthcare http://www.labour.org.nz/primary_mental_ health_teams https://www.greens.org.nz/page/drug-lawreform-policy http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/health http://www.top.org.nz/top8 http://act.org.nz/welfare-and-the-family/ http://www.maoriparty.org/health_ policy_2017
http://www.top.org.nz/top5 http://www.maoriparty.org/education_ policy_2017 Environment: http://d3n8a8pro7vhmx.cloudfront.net/ nationalparty/legacy_url/180/environmentpolicy.pdf?1484559621 http://www.labour.org.nz/water https://www.greens.org.nz/thriving-nature http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/environment_and_ conservation http://www.top.org.nz/top3 http://act.org.nz/conservation-and-theenvironment/ http://www.maoriparty.org/environment_ policy_2017 Housing: https://www.national.org.nz/national_s_ comprehensive_housing_plan https://www.labour.org.nz/housing https://www.greens.org.nz/policy/fairersociety/homes-not-cars http://www.nzfirst.org.nz/housing http://www.top.org.nz/top12 http://act.org.nz/housing/ http://www.maoriparty.org/housing_ policy_2017
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Giveaways
Kingsman 2 Screening
Cookietime giveaway
Keen for a night out at the movies? We have a double pass to Kingsman 2 The Golden Circle up for grabs thanks to our mates at Student Card. Kingsman 2 is the upcoming action spy comedy sequel to the 2014 Kingsman film. To enter, send your name and contact number through to win@mawsa.org.nz.
Me want cookies… you want cookies? We have a Cookie Time prize pack full of Cookie Time products valued at $70 to giveaway. To enter, send your name and contact phone number along with your favourite flavor cookie to win@ mawsa.org.nz.
Win a feast from Pita Pit
Schwarzkopf and Remington
Nab a Student Card
Feeling hungry? Our friends from Pita Pit in Manawatū are offering the mother of all giveaways. To go into the draw to win a free platter of Pita Pit pitas (a maximum of 10 pitas) for you and your flatties, simply send your name, and contact phone number to win@mawsa.org.nz. NOTE: Competition only available to students from Massey’s Manawatū campus.
Want to look your very best? We have something special for the lads to giveaway. Thanks to our friends at Schwarzkopf and Remington, we have a personal grooming pack to giveaway, made up of hair products and a personal grooming kit. To enter, send your name and contact number through to win@mawsa.org.nz
Grab a deal. We have two student cards to giveaway. Normally worth $20 these gems will score you discounted food, booze, clothes, travel and even makeup. If you want to get your hot little hands on one of these cards email your name and contact phone number through to win@mawsa.org.nz
ASB Auckland Marathon
We are giving away a free entry to the John West 12km Traverse! This is your chance to join in New Zealand’s biggest, most iconic, colourful, cultural running celebration, and the John West 12km Traverse is the quickest way across the bridge on two legs! To win, email your name and contact phone number to win@mawsa.org.nz. NOTE: Competition only available to students from Massey’s Albany campus.
Opinion | 17
A Pinch of Politics with Natasha Tziakis
Amongst the controversies and resignations surrounding politics over the last months, one thing has stayed completely the same during this election — and that’s the National Party’s silence. After John Key’s resignation, National came under the leadership of Bill English. English is a man who has spent a good period of time in Government, both as a minister and now as the Prime Minister. However, it is fair to say he lacks the charisma of his predecessor. Politics and leading a party is as much about having core leadership as it is about hooking people with one-liners and flashy policies that probably won’t be delivered on. All parties have done this. It doesn’t matter if they are right-leaning, left-leaning or centre; Governments have constantly neglected to follow through on some of the policies that garnered them their winning votes. National’s enduring silence has helped eradicate one of the biggest criticisms it could potentially face if the party gets back into government. Its policies are very much like the party’s 2014 election policies which gives them the opportunity to rectify the mistakes they made with that election, meaning they could possibly prioritise and establish policies it hasn’t done before. One thing that could combat National’s tactical silence is Jacinda Ardern. Ardern
is pushing herself and Labour’s campaign harder than I’ve ever seen before. Because of this, National could potentially become forgotten in the background as Labour continues to thrust itself into the forefront, with news coverage, advertising and ‘clickbait’ through social media sites such as Facebook. The ‘Jacinda effect’ is sweeping New Zealand. From her speeches to public meetings, she’s appearing to be more vivacious and dynamic than Andrew Little ever was. Something that has to be commended on both sides is that Ardern and English are both holding strong to their morals, and their parties. They have been the rocks that have held their parties together while all the controversy and drama played out. So, the trust being placed in them to lead their parties has not been misguided as they have both risen to the challenge. This election has seen the Green Party become a strong contender for the Kiwi throne, but it’s also seen their downfall. Often, in our national elections, it’s just a National versus Labour standoff with the Greens grasping at the sides for a scrap of attention. But when Shaw and Turei joined forces, they managed to make a big dent in the political scene and this saw them establish themselves as real trailblazers for forgotten kiwis. Unfortunately, due to
the mishandling of Turei’s past history with government funding and fraud, Green came toppling down. Although this in itself was horrible to watch, Shaw climbed out of the wreckage and is still going strong. I believe that in our next election Green will put up a bigger fight than ever before and we could potentially see a Green government. It is now up to the polling booths to see what strategy has won out this election — silence or exposure.
Gareth Morgan Twitter troll In late August, Gareth Morgan, leader of The Opportunities Party, took to Twitter to cause beef with Jacinda Ardern. He did this by saying that she needed substance in her policies as well as her personality. He then replied to a tweet from the public, saying, “Jacinda should be required to show she’s more than lipstick on a pig.” Lipstick on a pig is a term used to say that to make cosmetic or superficial changes cannot change the true existence of whatever problem is at hand. Yes, this is probably what Morgan meant, to say that having a new Labour leader cannot change their policies that seem to be more fluid than stable. But it came across as a sexist attack, questioning the integrity of Ardern herself.
18 | Interview
Wondering who to vote for in the 2017 General Election? Find out which parties think like you.
www.onthefence.co.nz
Interview | 19
Interview with Jacinda Ardern
She’s the woman with the biggest smile and the biggest chance of knocking National off its seat at the head of the table, there is no doubt Labour’s Jacinda Ardern has tipped this election upside down. Her approval ratings are near that of Bill English’s yet the girl from Morrinsville has only been in Labour’s top job for a matter of weeks. Massive’s Adam Pearse managed to steal a few moments of her time, asking her hard questions around tertiary education all while discussing her mad DJ skills. What do you think is the biggest issue facing students at the moment? One is a long term and one is an immediate issue. Those who have left [university] talk about the burden of debt and also the impact that has on their decisions around what they study, where they study, so that’s one issue. The other is living costs. So, the fact that people are only able to borrow a certain amount to live or access a certain amount through student allowance so we see two issues frequently raised. It often depends where people in the education system are as to what they raise with me. What is a broad overview of Labour’s plan to deal with student debt and living costs? One is actually in the long term to bring in three years of free education so that would at least mean that students are borrowing nearly as much over the course of their study. It also feeds into our plans to help the population retrain with the future of work and all of the challenges that brings. So, it helps us with two issues. So, that will make a big difference but otherwise, we’ve said that we just want to take a little bit of time to see what PREFU (Pre-Election Fiscal Update) delivers, see what’s available to do a little bit more in that space. How do you think three years of post-school education is going to work when universities are already strapped for cash? Some of that pressure we can deal with in other ways but actually some of that is [universities] wanting to keep their student numbers up as well. We expect that we’d see an uplift in perhaps 15 per cent in terms of student numbers and of course that makes a difference, that makes a difference to the viability of tertiary providers. Are these the reasons you would encourage students vote for Labour? It’s one of the reasons I hope students would at least consider our policies but ultimately, I still think young people look well beyond just their immediate needs. I think they look at what we are doing on bigger issues like inequality, innovation so they’ve got jobs, environmental issues, I think people look at a whole host of things.
I want to talk about the ‘Jacinda Effect’. Well I don’t know what it is so you can ask me but I don’t know what it is. Do you think that it will carry you through the election or are you going to need to push your own policies so you set yourself apart from the other parties? I would be happy for this to solely be a contest of vision and ideas because that’s what I’m campaigning on. I know there has been a lot of speculation on whether you will start a family as Prime Minister, what I want to know is are you going to have any pets as Prime Minister because they take time to feed and walk and I think the New Zealand public deserves to know. I think the New Zealand public deserve to know and I think you’re asking the big questions. I have a cat already and I believe in owning a pet I have demonstrated my ability to multi-task and maintain my leadership responsibilities whilst ensuring my cat is fed. I think it’s a sign of true leadership.
“I would be happy for this to solely be a contest of vision and ideas because that’s what I’m campaigning on.” What DJ set are you planning on spinning if you win? I would rather see an ensemble come and take over instead of a DJ set, I’d love to see and I’ve already talked about this, I think that Parliament’s lawn could just fit Fat Freddy’s Drop. I’d love to see an ensemble of some description otherwise you’re just a lone wolf up there DJ-ing by yourself. What is your final message to students and young voters? This is the moment where we either have a future where the next generation is worse of or better of, and we’ve always been proud of the fact that everything continually gets better for the next generation and I think this is the moment where that either changes for better or for worse so please vote. No matter what you do, just vote.
20 | Feature
Student political survey: Massive Magazine surveyed 243 students ahead of the 2017 General Elections to find out how much students really know about politics, here is what we found out. Do you intend to vote in the 2017 election?
YES
If you could vote online, would you be more likely to vote in the 2017 General Election?
YES
In your opinion, do you think you are up to date with New Zealand politics?
YES
97% 62% 58% Who is your preferred Prime Minister?
65.3%
Jacinda Ardern
5.7%
20.7%
Bill English Winston Peters Other
8.3%
91.7%
What month does the 2017 General Election take place? September October August November
21
38.0%
24.4%
What party are you most likely to support in the 2017 General Election?
21.9%
6.2%
5% 4.5%
1 3.3%
1.6%
5
3
16.9%
18.5%
One a scale of one to five, how much do you care about the results of the 2017 General Elections?
4 59.7%
CORRECT
98%
13.5% 17.0% 22.0%
23.2%
Who is the current Prime Minister?
What issue is most important to you in this election? Housing
Other
Student debt
Health
Child poverty
Education
Environment Mental health
22 | Choose your hero
How to: 1. Cut desired hero out by cutting along the dotted lines. 2. Attach string or stick to the back of the mask to it can go around your head or held up in front. 3. And voila! You have transformed into your final being.
Bill English
Leader of the National Party
Artist Feature | 23
Artist Feature:
Hendrix Arnold
Hendrix Arnold is a second year student studying photography at Massey’s Wellington Campus. Arnold’s powerful work depicts sites around the lower North Island where violent crimes and offences took place. The young photographer sat down to chat with Massive Magazine. My project focuses on sites in the Horowhenua and Wellington region where violent crimes and offences have been committed. Most of time these stories never get brought to the wider public’s attention, and people tend to engage with these places completely unaware of what could have happened there. I was working on a series about New Zealand child abuse and child mortality and I ended up opening the project up to sites of violent crimes. As part of this I spent a lot of time looking at Sternfeld’s work On This Site,
trying to approach the locations in a similar manner. I think it was definitely moving in its own way. It was a kind of humbling feeling knowing what had happened there, and it made me realise that I was shooting more than what was simply in front of the camera. There was a site where we ended up going back three times. Each time we’d go back in a different car and it would break down at the same point making it difficult to try and get a good photograph. I knew of three [of the sites] personally so those are the ones I started with. After that I looked at old news reports and was recommended a book in the university library called Wellington the Dark Side, which catalogued a lot of local crime scenes and locations with violent histories. I want to continue the project at some point, there were a lot of places I didn’t have enough time to visit.
13 Haining Street, Wellington
54 Churton Street, Lower Hutt
97 Kimberley Road, Levin
Waiterere Four Square
24 |
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651 Waitarere Beach Road, Levin, October 5 2015
At 6.05pm on the 5th of October 2015 10 year old Alex Fisher and his older half-brother Eric McIsaac were spotted on CCTV leaving Waitarere four square near Levin, this was the last sighting of the pair before they went missing. A search was conducted consisting of friends, family, volunteers and later members of the New Zealand military, lasting three days before Alex’s body was spotted in the sand dunes of Waitarere beach by helicopter. Alex was believed to have been killed in his sleep, he suffered two violent strikes to the head with a wood cutter and was wrapped in blankets when he was found. McIsaac was described as having a troubled past however Alex’s mother never thought of him as being a danger towards Alex. McIsaac was sentenced to life imprisonment for the murder of his 10 year old half-brother and has yet to reveal the cause for the murder.
26 | Opinion
Let’s talk about voting
By Charlie Pearson Today, I was asked by a friend, “who are you voting for?” and it caught me off guard. It always does. This has happened a few times now, and my reaction is always the same. I go on the defensive. I say, “I haven’t made my mind up yet,” and that’s not a complete lie. I haven’t made my mind up, but then, that’s the sort of thing someone who doesn’t follow politics would say, and I’m not that sort of person. At all. When I visited Washington DC earlier this year with my dad, I made sure to specifically go to the National Portrait Gallery, because I had read it was the only place outside of the White House with portraits of every American President ever (I feel like this admission may have revealed more about my personality than I’d hoped). I almost cried watching the live stream when Trump made his Presidential victory speech. I’ve read articles from people who are convinced that Theresa May (the current UK Prime Minister) is a robot. I even dipped into French politics when people started getting worried that Marine Le Pen (leader of the alt-right party, who shared eerie similarities with Trump) might win the election. And now, after the Turei debacle and with Jacinda mania, I’m even interested in the election back home. So, what’s the problem? I should preface by saying that I don’t have any problem with talking about politics in general terms, the premise fascinates me, it’s the specifics that I’m uncomfy with. I’ll talk about politics, just don’t put me in the picture. When the topic turns to my own political views, my heart starts to race and the words stop coming out of my mouth. Suddenly, I’m numbed by the thought that someone who hears what I’m saying will judge me for my views, twist them like they’re twisting my wrist as some kind of punishment. And God forbid if they don’t happen to share my entire political philosophy. Over and over again, I’ve heard people say, “you don’t talk about political affiliations on a first date,” and “it’s a no-no topic when you meet someone new,” and “it’s not a conversation for the dinner table”. When you phrase it like that, politics starts to sound painful, like an in-depth debate on the
viscosity of diarrhoea (dear God, I can’t believe I came up with that metaphor so readily). But at the same time, I get it. Politics is a personal topic. Some people hold it closer to their heart than others. There’s no getting away from that. When you ask someone who they’re voting for, you’re asking them for a platter with all their ethics and morals laid out on it, ready to be served with crackers, not knowing if that person likes blue cheese or believes taking action on climate change is a priority. You’re opening up your pantry to show someone how you believe the world should be run, and simultaneously inviting personal scrutiny. There’s something so intimate about telling people those things. So, I guess, to be honest, when my friends – or anyone for that matter – asks who I’m voting for, I should just say, “I’ve pretty much made up my mind, I just don’t want to tell you, because I don’t want you to judge me”. There’s something kind of twisted about that though. I’m going to get a bit preachy now, so I apologise in advance, but politics at its core is about creating positive change for the benefit of the nation and its people, so shouldn’t we really just be happy that people are voting? Because it shows that people care, not only about themselves but the greater population. It’s as simple as that, isn’t it? The overarching mission of politics is to make things better than they currently are, each party just has its own way of getting from point A. Here to point B. Somewhere better. The National Party’s blue road plows a line through the hill of lower taxes while Labour’s red carpet weaves through the valley of more-money-for-education-and-hospitals, and so on. We’re voting for a better future. Isn’t that enough? And even to the people who choose not to vote, shouldn’t we be happy that they’re exercising their right to choose, to show that, ‘hey, we don’t live in a dictatorship where people are forced to do things that maybe they don’t want to’. If we have the ability to vote, shouldn’t we also have the ability to not vote, and be looked at the same way? I’m trying very hard to take the moral high ground here because, in all honesty, I do judge people when they tell me they’re not going
27
“Do not think your single vote does not matter much. The rain that refreshes the parched ground is made up of single drops.” – Kate Sheppard
to vote. For some – and I can’t help but share the sentiment – not voting reads like a statement of rebellion against the very fabric of our democracy. It feels like a wasted opportunity. You tell me you’re not voting and immediately I’m thinking you’re lazy, selfish and aloof. But that’s not true either, for the most part. Or is it? I like to believe that people who don’t vote, do so because they’ve thought long and hard about their options, weighed up each candidate and their policies, and come to the conclusion that they don’t trust any one person or party enough to give them their vote. I also know there’ll be people out there who don’t vote because they never have and that’s the mindset they’ve been brought up with. Then again, the way freedom in a democracy works, ideally, is that people have just as much of a right to vote and think about it very deeply, as they do to not vote and claim democracy as a ‘shit show’. But here we are, very passively shutting those people out of having a say in the politics conversation, stopping them from even wanting to engage with it. It’s like not letting white people talk about racism: I get it, but it’s also kind of rude. Then there are people who don’t feel like they can talk about politics in general, let alone who they’re voting for, because of a lack of knowledge. We live in a world where the answer to any question can be found just by typing it into Google, so ignorance doesn’t need to exist anymore if we just make the effort to read. Which is great. Ignorance can be a hurtful tool, but at the same time, we’re all ignorant about some things. So, when it comes to politics, an issue that we’re all involved in whether we like it or not, there’s no room for to be ignorant if you’re roped into a conversation about it. Say you’re asked your thoughts on Labour’s new water policy, if you reply with, “I don’t know,” that might be interpreted as you not caring about the environment or not being a Labour supporter, when neither is the case. You just don’t follow politics. It’s not that you don’t care about our country, only that you don’t go out of your way to follow national news. Maybe you don’t have time to read all those policies and articles, maybe you’re just not interested in politics as a thing. Being uninformed shouldn’t be
a reason for scolding and judgey looks, but it can be, especially when the person who asks the question is a politics fanatic or an environmentalist. So, what happens is those people will stop talking about politics at all. Not because they’re not going to vote, or even that they’re not interested in having the conversation – it’s because they don’t want to look like they don’t know.
“Because it shows that people care, not only about themselves but the greater population. ” Go on, let’s talk about voting, whatever your stance may be, whether you’re voting or not, whether you support NZ First or National, let’s talk. We’re social beings by nature, we like to talk, so why can’t we talk about this? And to those people who ask me, “who are you voting for?” I applaud you, despite your apparent inability to see how uncomfortable that question makes me. I applaud your brashness and transparency. So the next time someone asks me who I’m voting for in this election I’ll tell them: “I’m going to disgrace my family name and vote Labour.” (I seriously contemplated whether or not I would put that in, it still makes me uncomfy, I can’t help it).
28 | Opinion
Breaking the silence... and David Seymour
By Bethany Reitsma In June 2017, ACT Party leader David Seymour’s End of Life Choice Bill was drawn from the ballot, asking for euthanasia, or assisted suicide, to be legalised in New Zealand. Since Parliament will close for the election before the Bill’s scheduled reading, it’s unlikely to be passed anytime soon. The issue will come up again, however, and New Zealanders appear to be pretty divided over whether legalised euthanasia would be good for the country. This has some implications for our suicide rate, especially among our young people. Let’s get some definitions out of the way first:
incurable disease. I’ve watched my grandparents gradually lose their physical strength, and their immune systems go downhill. More than once my oma (grandmother) has told me she was ready to die and go to heaven. People get tired of living, and it’s heart-breaking to watch. Wouldn’t it be better to end it quickly and painlessly? The other positive about euthanasia is that it provides a sense of control and of dignity in death. You decide when and how you die and when you get to say goodbye. The ideal way to die is on your own terms, isn’t it? That’s the best-case scenario.
Euthanasia: The patient requests a lethal injection, given to them by a medical professional.
But…
Assisted suicide: The patient is prescribed lethal drugs by their health professional, and they take the drugs in their own time.
How do we define “unbearable suffering”? It’s up to the individual to decide how bad their pain is, but there are so many kinds of pain relief we have available. A maximum of four per cent of patients experience pain that isn’t able to be relieved by medication, in which case they can ask to be sedated.
What euthanasia is not: Refusing food/water, asking not to be resuscitated if your heart or breathing stops, refusing treatment such as chemotherapy, or refusing to be kept on life support. These things are within your rights as a patient. What the bill says: •
That any New Zealand citizen or permanent resident 18 or older can request euthanasia or assisted dying if:
•
They have a terminal illness or other medical condition that is likely to end their life within six months; or
•
They have a grievous and irremediable medical condition; and
•
They are in an advanced state of irreversible decline in capability;
•
They are experiencing unbearable suffering that cannot be relieved in a manner that they consider tolerable; and
•
They have the ability to understand the nature of assisted dying; and the consequences for them of assisted dying.
So what are the positives? Seymour says that the Bill takes a compassionate approach to people who suffer from incurable conditions. In my own conversations with friends and family about this, people say to me that they don’t want to deteriorate slowly or suffer through an
The wording used in the Bill raises some questions right off the bat.
What is an irremediable medical condition? This definition is pretty general. But think about the wording. Diabetes is an irremediable medical condition, and so are severe asthma and anaphylactic allergies. Most medical conditions are treatable even if they’re irremediable. What does it mean to be in an advanced state of irreversible decline in capability? Sounds like the natural ageing process could come under this definition. So could disability. The phrase “likely to end their life in six months” is problematic because as any doctor will tell you, it’s impossible to accurately predict when someone’s life will end. All they can do is guess at the best. And often their estimates turn out to be inaccurate. I’ve known so many people with cancer who were given a few months to live, but then ended up living past that limit. It would be pretty risky to offer someone euthanasia when you could be cutting short their life and opportunities. It’s unlikely someone could make the choice to end their life free of outside influences. As an example – in the state of Oregon, America, 40 per cent of those who asked for euthanasia in 2014 said that feeling like they were a burden influenced their decision. A Stuff headline I saw earlier this month sums up how I feel about the issue: Motivated by compassion for those suffering but raises
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For more info on both sides of the issue head to:
concerns for the vulnerable. These concerns can’t be ignored. So there’s other scenarios that we risk seeing as well as the positive cases. Why does this matter for us as students? I used to think euthanasia was really just an issue for the elderly. I also thought euthanasia was a merciful option for someone deteriorating mentally and physically. I still understand that position, and I have compassion for those people, but I’ve since realised it’s a bit more complicated than that. I started thinking about what this all means for our suicide rate in New Zealand, and more specifically, our youth suicide rate, which we all acknowledge as a huge problem. New Zealand has the highest teen suicide rate in the developed world, and the second highest rate among those 25 and younger. The New Zealand Herald recently ran a fantastic series of articles entitled Break the Silence, with the goal of starting a conversation about youth suicide and what we can do about it. We need to start suicide prevention early with the kids in our schools.
•
http://euthanasiadebate.org.nz/
•
http://www.hospice.org.nz/about-hospice-nz/ euthanasia-our-opinion
•
https://eolc.org.nz/
•
http://www.worldrtd.net/information
•
To read the bill: http://www.legislation.govt.nz/bill/ member/2017/0269/latest/DLM7285905.html
and Palliative Care Nurses New Zealand and others have all spoken against a law change, saying that the option of euthanasia complicates their motives and goals as healthcare professionals and undermines the important relationship of trust between patient and doctor. Euthanasia is cheaper than palliative care, and legalising it could mean we put fewer resources into making sure palliative care is good quality. I’ve spoken to nurses, doctors and even a couple of local MPs who all affirm that euthanasia isn’t the answer to suffering; rather, we should keep focusing on caring for patients.
“New Zealand has the highest teen suicide rate in the developed world...”
I can’t be the only one who sees a double standard here. We’re determined to lower the suicide rate for our young people, but we want to help people who are ageing or sick end their lives sooner? By making efforts to prevent suicide on one hand and on the other encouraging it, we’re sending a mixed message to our young people. The bill says that euthanasia would be an option for those 18 and over. It’s possible that the age restriction would fall away, if New Zealand follows the pattern in other countries such as the Netherlands, where parents can decide if they want their sick child euthanised. Arguably, the Euthanasia Bill isn’t going to help our suicide rates, it’s only going to legitimise suicide.
We don’t have the death penalty in New Zealand because the possibility of a mistake means someone might lose their life unjustly. That whole method got scratched out because of how costly a simple mistake could be. I would argue that with euthanasia, there’s a high risk of error as well. Say the doctor doesn’t interpret the patient’s wishes correctly. Say the patient asks for euthanasia when they’re in a depressed state, and changes their mind after the form has been signed. What if someone won’t admit they’ve been pressured into it by their friends and family? What if a young person asks for euthanasia without notifying anyone else? The risks trump the benefits.
We’ve all known someone, either personally or through someone else, who has reached that rock bottom stage where they feel suicide is the only option. Each one of these cases is a tragedy, often completely preventable. But it’s about choice and autonomy, right? Why should we refer to a teen girl’s suicide as a tragedy or a waste, and to our grandma’s decision to end her life because she feels like a burden on the family as a wise and dignified choice? Is any individual’s choice legitimate when it comes to suicide, or only some of them?
It can be argued that requesting euthanasia doesn’t really give you autonomy. Rather, you’re giving a doctor power to bring about your death at a specific time. Other people become implicated in your death. That’s what the euthanasia debate is really about: whether someone else should be given the power to help you end your life.
We value our youth. We should value our aging population too. The New Zealand Medical Association, Hospice New Zealand, the Australian and New Zealand Society of Palliative Medicine,
Finally, choosing death doesn’t just have consequences for the person who makes that choice. These things affect everyone around us. It starts by breaking the silence. We need to be talking about how making suicide a legitimate option affects us all, both young and old. Something to be thinking about as we head into the election this year…
30 |
Humour | 31
Modern Miss Lonelyhearts
Join Massive’s own agony aunt, as she dissects the peaks and pitfalls of dating in a millennial world.
Everyone has been abubble about it for quite some time now – so yes, I know, I’m late to the party. But recently, after an extended single-life hiatus, I decided to check this sucker out.
•
There is no smooth or natural way of beginning a conversation with a total stranger when the only thing you have in common is the belief that you both are not ugly.
Tinder. The love child of match.com and candy crush. The thrilling instant validation, only ever a swipe or two away. All wrapped up in a delightful crimson red flame.
•
If you didn’t know you had a type: you do. Hence the quick-fire way you can absolutely HATE or love someone based on their face alone.
When initially downloading the app and diving head first into a seemingly vast new array of potential suitors, naturally, I had a fair few questions. What are people doing on here? Is anyone taking this seriously? Are we all just here for hookups, or something more? Is it too superficial? Is it dangerous? How long before I come across a few too many uncomfortably familiar faces?
•
There is always a stranger way to spell a name. Future parents, take note: you thought Craig couldn’t be messed up? Think again: I just found myself a strapping young lad named ‘Kreagg’.
•
Apparently guys are yet to learn that a picture of you with some form of poor dead animal across your shoulders is not appealing.
•
A clever one liner goes a LONG way.
•
Everyone loves traveling! And working out! And trying new things! And food!
•
If the main photo includes two or more people, nine times out of ten, the profile won’t belong to the cutest one.
•
You never get a second chance at a first impression – but hey, no pressure, right?
•
Nothing brings to your attention the old embarrassing Facebook ‘interests’ of yours quite like seeing ‘F0rget princess!! I wanna be a VAMP!RE!!’ crop up at the bottom of your profile.
•
If someone is less than a mile away, put your phone down slowly – very slowly – and run for your life (okay, maybe this one is just me).
The potential ‘danger’ aspect got to me more than most – being reminded that the person I just spoke to is “less than a mile away” had me wondering. Was I one poorly judged swipe away from winding up in the boot of some guy named Frank’s car, never to see the light of day again, all because my drunken mind somehow thought his cheesy tagline was charming? But hey, I’m dramatic. What started out as a curious exploration was now sparking something more. Soon enough, it had me pondering what exactly Tinder suggests about modern day dating in general. Is it all simply a microcosm of what we do in real life? File people away as attractive or unattractive, make split second decisions based on minimal facts, trust complete strangers? Do we really need to know tonnes of information about someone to know if they’re really a good ‘match’? Thus, I compiled an unofficial list of Tinder truths – many of which can be applied to the art of dating in general.
32 | Interview
Interview with Jan Thomas
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Jan Thomas was announced as the new Vice Chancellor of Massey University earlier this year. Thomas replaces former Vice Chancellor Steve Maharey in the top role. Massive’s Adam Pearse had the opportunity last month to sit down with and former vet Thomas, who hails from Australia, and pick her brains about the future direction of the university. Pearse’s interview with Thomas lasted more than two hours so the feature you see below is an abridged version. A full version can be found on Massive’s website. Tell us a little bit about where you’re from, what you’ve done, and how it is you came to be here. I am obviously Australian, I have spent most of my academic career in Australia, Murdoch University in Western Australia, where I grew up, and then the last five years I was Vice Chancellor at the University of Southern Queensland in regional Queensland. The move across here was in part because New Zealand is an impressive country. If you’re going to put your shoulder to the wheel, you want to have values alignment and I have always admired New Zealand, so that was an attractive factor. Of course because my disciplinary background is veterinary science I have known about Massey for a very long time and its agriculture and food technology reputation. So when I was approached to apply for the job I thought it could actually be a really good opportunity and a great fit for me because of the experiences I have had at the University of Southern Queensland would prepare me well. It’s a wonderful privilege to be here and I am loving the Manawatū. Why did you leave your life as a vet, which is very practical, for an admin job? I loved being a vet but I went on to specialise as a veterinary pathologist, I did that at the University of Melbourne. Veterinary pathologists tend to be located either in government diagnostic facilities, research centres, or universities. I had the opportunity to progress as a diagnostic veterinary pathologist in the university, I really liked it and I enjoyed teaching and then an opportunity came for a short term job as an academic, teaching research. Over the years I fell in love with what universities are able to do. They’re incredibly significant institutions in mature democracies, they’re city institutions that have particular roles.
Most students have no idea who their Vice Chancellor is, some of them still think it’s Steve Maharey. Are you going to be any different? When I was an undergraduate I had no clue who my Vice Chancellor was and most of the time students don’t even know who their dean or head of school is. I am not naive. Most university students would not know who their Vice Chancellor was unless there was a particular problem. Steve [Maharey], I absolutely want to acknowledge his leadership here because he was a significant Vice Chancellor for Massey and a significant national leader coming out of the political background he had… So it’s not surprising people still think it’s Steve Maharey because he was so well known. Should students know [who their Vice Chancellor is]? Well I hope students have been seeing things like posters around talking about my strategy consultation with students, I hope they have heard me on the student radio. In fact a lot of students will approach me in the supermarket and say ‘you’re the Vice Chancellor aren’t you, I recognised your picture on those posters’. So I am sure the majority of students don’t know who I am, but I certainly hope the influence I have in setting the direction of Massey is able to be recognised by people who will benefit from it. I won’t look for popularity or profile for no reason other than profile. I am not a politician, I am the chief executive of a major institution in New Zealand and I don’t undertake that lightly. You’re sitting at home, you’ve had a long day of answering pesky reporters. What’s that special meal or beverage that is total comfort food? I have been changing my palette from the Australian palette to the New Zealand palette, so I have not touched red wine from Australia since I arrived here. I’ve only been drinking New Zealand [wine] as part of a scientific experiment. I moderate as best I can all the pinot noirs from Central Otago… I will move onto another region when I have done that just so that I can actually get a handle on the wine culture in New Zealand, it’s important. So for that I would be having lasagne and a pinot and then after I might have a scotch. What is something about New Zealand culture that has surprised you the most?
As you can see around my office, I am deeply immersed in learning Te Reo and tikanga. I will not stop that until I feel fluent and that I can get into the Maori mindset because I think it’s really important. If you’re going to be a leader in New Zealand you need to understand this and I know that’s an area I need to work on and I am working on it. So I know it was a risk from the council’s perspective to appoint me, I am determined not to let them down.
I’ve yet to get my head around it, what are these giant bags of pre-cooked sausages that you see at the supermarket, what are those? They’re already cooked and you just stick them on to brown them? I know what a sausage sizzle is but what I have not seen is the pre-cooked sausages. I think I am most struck by, and it’s easy to forget, because it was really quite compelling when I first moved here, is just how Pacific this nation is. I think also it’s interesting how Maori culture has influenced New Zealand culture, even if people in New Zealand haven’t necessarily recognised it, it is easy to see. The whole value of whanau, how significant that is and yet how that has been balanced out quite effectively across the social elements of New Zealand – things like same-sex marriage and those sorts of things, which are actually entirely wonderfully normalised and normal here. And yet at the same time some of those more traditional values around family and whanau… are also held and held in beautiful balance, and that’s a really wonderful aspect of the New Zealand culture.
Do you think your lack of knowledge in New Zealand culture would be one of your biggest weaknesses taking this role?
What are you watching on the telly, what does the Vice Chancellor watch to unwind?
Weaknesses and also opportunities. Most definitely, I am not a kiwi, and although I really want to be a kiwi… In five years I can become a citizen, but not yet. Of course I am always trying to improve, but I knew before I came here that I would need to spend a lot of time understanding the mindset, the challenges and opportunities and so on for New Zealand and then also for Massey, so I can make this my home and so that I can be successful as a Vice Chancellor.
Netflix is a staple for me in my world and there is nothing better than curling up under the doona (duvet) with my iPad or something and watching a little bit of Netflix, that’s delightful. I do like Game of Thrones but because you can’t get it on Netflix that’s a little bit of a challenge for me at the moment, but I love things like House of Cards, Designated Survivor, those kind of things – White House dramas I really enjoy those.
Why did Massey choose you to run this University? I am the wrong person to ask. For a start I met the selection criteria, I have extensive experience in universities and particularly universities like Massey. In many ways bringing someone in from not a New Zealand background is a risk, and I hope I will prove to them that that was a risk that was worth taking.
34 | Opinion
Conor McGregor: The biggest balls in boxing The Yarns from Pitch Five
Massive’s resident sports jockey, Adam Pearse, tackles the sporting quandaries of our time with the skill of Saville, the daring of Devillin, and the vibrancy of Veitchy (forgetting his history with stairways). From cricket to croquet and everything in between, these are the Yarns from Pitch Five. You know everyone was thinking it in those first couple of rounds. The way McGregor came at Mayweather, the aggression, the physicality. You couldn’t help but wonder, ‘holy shit can that bloody Irishman actually win?’. As it turns out, Mayweather basically had McGregor right where he wanted him and ended up as scripted as a bust up on Geordie Shore. However, while it may not have been the bout of the century, there is a reason this became boxing’s billion-dollar bonanza. What we saw was one of the all-time greats of boxing in Floyd Mayweather, come out of retirement to fight for his 50th straight win against the king of MMA and the man on the top of everyone’s Facebook page, Conor McGregor. The premise alone for this fight was enough to get any sports pundit a little wet behind the ears. But as much as the reputation of Mayweather helped fuel the fire, the flame had been ignited and roared into an inferno by the marketing genius that is Conor McGregor. Let’s be real for a second; McGregor knew he was never going to win. Even with height, reach, and being eleven years his junior, the Irishman stood no chance against a man that has not lost. That didn’t matter. For McGregor, it was all about the build-up. I believe he lives today as the world’s premier hype man. His enthusiasm was infectious. His energy was captivating. His speeches were so crazy it made Trump look like the Queen of England. And this was his game plan. He’s a genius really when you think about it. To get the opportunity to cross codes and fight one of the best there has ever been is one thing, but whipping the fans into hysterics across the globe that led to him netting over $100 million is nothing short of sensational. Despite these heroics, some still question McGregor’s motives. They say, ‘he just did it for the money’, and ‘he doesn’t care about boxing’. Well, of course, he
fucking did! Why else do you think he left the safety of his octagon to get pummelled by TBE? Not only is that a pay check that will last him a lifetime, the amount of publicity and attention he will attract back to MMA will be unimaginable.
“As it turns out, Mayweather basically had McGregor right where he wanted him and ended up as scripted as a bust up on Geordie Shore.” It’s now you may be thinking that this whole event was a win-win for both participants. For Mayweather, he makes it 50-0 making his case ever stronger as the man on top of rest. However, for McGregor, he had to take a loss and a definite one at that. For all his rhetoric that was spread across the world about how he would knock Floyd out within two rounds and that this fight would be a walk in the park, at the end of the day, he was just the latest in a long line of Mayweather scalps. I tell you, that takes balls. To proclaim yourself to be top shit only to have that shit returned to you in sandwich variety is no small feat. But it’s all over now. No doubt his loss will be remembered by viewers for years, but his fame and stardom will only continue to skyrocket, as will his bank account. If there was a lesson in all of this it would be that you can say what you want, do what you want, and still get paid at the end of the day, as long as you’re willing to get the shit kicked out of you and resign yourself to a life of mental health issues that will torment you forever. But if you’re in a suit that literally tells people to get fucked, alzheimer’s doesn’t seem that bad.
Opinion | 35
Mum’s the Word:
A not so smooth move
Massive columnist Taryn Dryfhout looks at how to juggle a ‘study mummy’ life, at the same time as working, raising children, volunteering and maintaining her sanity throughout. I’d rather jump into a pile of broken Lego than pack up my house and move, but unfortunately, this week moving was on the cards for us. Moving houses is a mission at the best of times. Moving houses with four small children and a chest infection, is Mission Impossible. According to a recent longitudinal study, Growing Up in New Zealand, kiwi families with children under two, move houses far more often than they used to, and far more often than families in other countries. This came as no surprise to us – this marks our fourth move in three years, and our tenth move since our oldest child (10) was born. Like everything, our primary intentions for this relocation were to be as organised as possible. As soon as we are offered a house, my husband and I sat down and tried to map out our master plan – we will spend two weeks packing up this place, move into the new place over several days, unpacking as we go, before coming back here for the final clean, and to say goodbye to the house we have called a home. Of course, the reality is very different. We ended up with 36 hours to move out of our current house and into the new one, return to the old one to clean it, and return the key. In true Dryfhout style, I also developed a severe chest infection while I was knee deep in the packing phase, rendering me almost useless until the multitude of pills I was prescribed kicked in. The move quickly became mania, as we attempted to deconstruct our entire domestic environment in a matter of hours. Of course, the major obstacle in moving is having four children, one of whom is like living with a two-year-old hurricane. While boxes full of stuff might, to the adult eye, look like things that are packed and ready to go to the next house, to Mr Two, they are boxes full of fun party materials which are to be strewn around the room, stuffed into the couch cushions, and put back in the places from which the items originally came. He also loves to undo any cleaning out that I attempt. When I am moving, I like to sort as I go. In every room I am packing, I have a box in the corner
dedicated to the nearest Salvation Army Family Store, and I throw unwanted items in there, that I don’t intend to take to the next house. When Mr Two sees these boxes, he suddenly realises that all of his favourite things are in there, including the toys he has ‘been looking everywhere for’, and the ones he needs to sleep with tonight. Once he has manipulated his way into keeping all his stuff, I have three items sitting in the bottom of the ‘donate’ box.
“I’d rather jump into a pile of broken Lego than pack up my house and move...” Whilst these things are challenging, the real killer is trying to move to a new house whilst keeping up with the usual routines. Apparently, moving to a new house doesn’t mean that the kids don’t need to have a bath, that they don’t need to have their school uniforms washed, or that everyone doesn’t still have to eat. Who knew? Two days, several injuries, and a flat tyre later, we are in our new place, and very relieved, as are the kids. I can’t see us volunteering to move again anytime soon.
36 | Humour
Dilemma Doctor
Since real life doctors are expensive, sometimes it pays to take the advice of more ‘alternative’ practices. Bring your problems, not your apples, and the Dilemma Doctor will prescribe you some terrible advice. Whether you take it or not is up to you, but always know the Doctor has your best interests at heart, even if he does hold a questionable MD. Dear Doctor, I have an assignment due next week and so I decided to pull two all-nighters. I thought it was a good idea at the time to consume as many stimulants as possible. I had a double berocca every half hour, one double espresso every hour, energy drinks at random, caffeine pills, supplements and a fuckton of cheese toasties. It definitely worked and I finished it but it’s been three days since the all-nighters, and I am still perpetually in a heightened state. I cannot sleep, I am consuming copious amounts of food, and there’s a loud buzzing in my right ear canal. What can I do to calm down? -Hyper Hannah You’re looking at this the wrong way, Hannah. Why wouldn’t you want to be in a never-ending state of heightened awareness? Not only did you get your assignment finished, but you’d probably be able to hit a fly with a bottle flip. If you ask me, being able to sense everything is far better than being half asleep and late to all your lectures. Stay productive, you have the advantage now, so use it. Fuck it, increase the No Doz and do six all-nighters, finish the rest of your degree. Then you have all the time in the world to put that energy towards something more useful, like working day and night shifts to pay off your student debt. Don’t stop there, travel, get married, have kids. At this rate you could have the rest of your whole life in the space of a few months. Which works out quite nicely, seeing as you’ll probably die of a heart attack by then. Dear Doctor, I don’t remember what I did last night but there was a freaking golden toad happily chilling in my kitchen sink this morning, eating from an open jar of Pic’s Peanut Butter. I’ve gapped it and have decided to spend a few days at my mates place, but what if I get back and it’s still there? I can’t own a frog, what do I do? -Giddy Gabriel I can tell you what you did, based off the following deduction. Firstly we’ll look at what you experienced, and how it’s complete bullshit. Golden toads don’t exist, Gab. They went extinct in 1989. Also nobody ever shares Pic’s Peanut Butter with anyone else. The stuff is liquid gold and there is not a living soul that would be physically capable of sharing it with anyone, let alone a non-existent amphibian. That leads me to believe you are hallucinating, Gab. Your good spelling and grammar rules out all but two substances,
and it’s the cold season, meaning ‘shrooms aren’t exactly abundant. That leaves MDMA, but it only lasts three to six hours which leads me to believe that you didn’t take MDMA last night. The only explanation then is that you took it less than three to six hours ago, came home and napped, then woke up thinking it was the next day and you were perfectly alright. You entered the kitchen to find that either you or an absolute asshole of a flatmate has dug into your heavenly Pic’s, and the sheer emotional loss you would have felt at that, combined with the happy pill rush in your system manifested itself in the form of a golden toad. It could be a metaphor or your patronus, but regardless I have a feeling that when you get back the toad will be gone. Unfortunately, so will the Pic’s.
Dear Doctor, This incredibly beautiful girl started working at my job at Subway. She’s perfect in every way, and I desperately want to date her. But there’s no way I can date somebody I work with. I learned that from watching my mate hook her boyfriend up with the same job as her and it ended in tears and unprofessional customer service. Is there anything I can do or will I have to let this beautiful creature go? -Aroused Adrian Definitely don’t fuck your colleagues, that’s career and relationship suicide, and could even result in someone being forced to eat a live rat (depends on where you work, punishment can vary from establishment to establishment). There’s only one way out here. You have to get her fired. Of course you’d prefer to avoid getting fired yourself, so be discreet. Lucky for you, Discreet is my middle name (one of eight actually, let’s not get into it). Subway is a difficult one since the customer can clearly see you making their food, meaning you can’t put a rat in their sub and pretend it was her. What you can do, however, is report her behaviour to management anonymously. Tell them she screams at customers, gets orders wrong, and that she tried to make you eat a live rat. Who’s management gonna believe? An honest worker and romantic such as yourself, or some weird chick who just started? As long as you keep it anonymous, she won’t suspect a thing, and you can even put yourself in her good books by chatting to her about how unfair management is, and how they accuse the workers of horrible things until they eventually quit and find a much better job that’s not this Subway in particular, before getting into a happy relationship with an honest and romantic lad who is in uh… the culinary business.
DISCLAIMER: Although the Dilemma Doctor has your very best interests in heart please keep in mind he is no expert. If you are after serious advice, please consult a professional.
38 | Column Creative Writing
Bitchin’ Kitchen with Hannah Colenbrander
Chickpea Curry You’ll be surprised how good this meal is, for how little ingredients go into making it. Chickpea curry is super delish and hardly takes any time at all. It’s also surprisingly filling and goes a long way, making it perfect to heat up when you get home from a late one at uni trying to desperately to finish hand-ins on time. Ingredients:
Method:
½ an onion
Fry the onion and garlic until soft, add chickpeas and fry until browned. Add tomato soup and stir for five minutes. Add fresh cream and curry powder. Stir until all ingredients are mixed. Let simmer.
Two cloves of garlic One can of chickpeas One can of tomato soup One tablespoon curry powder Half a bottle of fresh cream Rice
Booked In: Chapter Ten: Socio-patriotic responsibility — wait, what? Earlier this year, I read and enjoyed two books back to back. The Chimes by Anna Smaill, and The Suicide Club by Sarah Quigley. The Chimes is set in a dystopian future wherein music is law and memory is fleeting. The concept is original and the book is beautifully written in a lyrical style that would probably annoy more pragmatic readers, though I personally enjoyed it. The Suicide Club, meanwhile, follows three 20 year olds on a journey through their own heads and to a therapy retreat in Bavaria. Despite the heavy subject matter (the title doesn’t lie), the quirky and oftentimes humorous style and tone of the novel keeps the reader on their toes — because with mental illness, you never know when everything will come crashing down. These books are different on the surface, but not lacking notable similarities, which have very little to do with the books themselves. They’re both written by New Zealand authors; this is the most important feature. Despite this, they’re both set in England. The fact that these novels would both be written by Kiwi authors but set in England really struck me, and not for no reason. Throughout school, oftentimes if we were assigned a New Zealand book to read, it tended to heavily concern and involve Maori culture and mythology. David Hair’s The Bone Tiki is one I specifically recall. I’m in no way saying this is a bad thing, and it’s entirely understandable that set readings in schools would be focused in such a direction. However, because of this, my understanding of books set in New Zealand came to be associated with an unspoken rule that such books (especially books with fantastical elements) must incorporate native culture and mythology.
Should the integration of Maori culture and mythology be a prerequisite for writing set in New Zealand? Do New Zealand Europeans even have the right to write about such things? Personally, I think any writer is entitled to cover any topic they wish, so long as they do the proper research. But I’m certain there are people who would disagree with me. Perhaps the bigger question is: is it acceptable to set a book in New Zealand without featuring or referencing Maori culture or mythology? How about a book which doesn’t even have a single Maori character, even just as a token? Is tokenism worse than exclusion? Furthermore, you can’t discuss culture in New Zealand without acknowledging how much of a cultural hot-pot our nation is. Offshore Polynesian cultures have a notable presence, as do Asians. There are, however, areas of the country with very little cultural diversity, specifically the northern part of the Auckland region— which is where I’ve just so happened to have lived my entire life. ‘It’s a highly complicated issue’ is a sentence that I can’t type without evoking a heavy sense of déjà vu, because apparently I’m allergic to covering simple topics with clear-cut answers in this column. I did some research about New Zealand books and found that while there are — of course, as there should be — plenty of books set in New Zealand which do concern themselves with Maori tradition, there are also plenty that are set offshore, and others set in New Zealand without making a big issue out of Maori representation. Because it simply isn’t the focus of the novel. I mean, after looking all this up, I can quite safely conclude that I’m overanalysing this whole deal, but I still think that, for anyone who cares about literature in New Zealand, it’s worth thinking about.
Choose your hero | 39
How to: 1. Cut desired hero out by cutting along the dotted lines. 2. Attach string or stick to the back of the mask to it can go around your head or held up in front. 3. And voila! You have transformed into your final being.
Jacinda Ardern
Leader of the Labour Party
40 | Culture with Paul Berrington
At the Movies: Our Picks The Trip to Spain (2017): Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon reunite with director Michael Winterbottom for this latest food odyssey. Expect the razor sharp wit of the previous films as two of the UK’s most acclaimed comedians give each other grief for an hour and half.
6 Days (2017) Director: Toa Fraser
Starring: Jamie Bell, Abbie Cornish, Mark Strong
3/5 One of two new films from New Zealand director Toa Fraser to debut at the New Zealand International Film Festival in 2017 (the other a documentary entitled The Free Man), 6 Days details the 1980 Iranian Embassy Siege in London, a mostly forgotten event that set the benchmark for government response to hostage situations in future years. Written by Glenn Standring, who collaborated with Fraser on The Dead Lands, the pair have created an insightful and terse narrative, delivering a detailed recreation of the siege, even if they struggle a little with the pacing and political context. Six gunmen wearing balaclavas storm the Iranian Embassy on Wednesday 30 April, 1980, taking 26 people – mostly Iranian staffers – hostage and demanding that fellow members of the separatist group – Iranian Arabs imprisoned for uprising in the Khuzestan Provinces, are released from captivity. Max Vernon (Mark Strong) is brought in to negotiate, at first gaining their trust but increasingly finding no leg room from either side with the Iranian government refusing to even communicate with the hostage takers. Meanwhile with Margaret Thatcher’s approval, a back-up plan has been hatched, with a crack SAS group led by Rusty Firmin (Jamie Bell) developing an audacious plan to go in and ‘neutralise’ the terrorists. As negotiations crumble, tensions arise inside and out, BBC reporter Kate Adie (Abbie Cornish) cleverly bringing the suspense into British homes with live updates. Finally, and inevitably, it’s time for Rusty and his soldiers to put hours of training into practice. Standring’s script is excellent when recreating both the tense backroom shenanigans of government during crisis, and also when showing us the rhythms and precision of SAS training. Yet the film does tell a one-sided story for the most part. Whether this is intentional – the film has the feel of a police procedural – or not, it does simplify a complicated diplomatic process in favour of showing us, ‘this is how it was done’. Mark Strong’s character Max is our only real window into the motivations of the Iranian Arab group, a pity as it might have added another interesting layer. Bell’s take on Rusty Firmin is suitably gruff, yet Cornish is disappointing as the infamous Kate Adie. Technically though, Fraser’s direction is incredibly skilful throughout, highlighted by an incredible recreation of the SAS response that gives the story its climax. This phenomenal set piece alone should attract further international interest in this undeniably versatile filmmaker.
The Big Sick (2017): Billed by some critics as the romcom of the decade, this film tells the true story of Pakistan-born comedian Kumail who connects with grad student Emily after one of his stand-up sets, their relationship surprising not only themselves but their extended families. Wind River (2017): Taylor Sheridan’s scripts for Sicario and Hell or High Water have established him as the go to man for classic American drama, and with his directional debut he furthers this reputation, as Jeremy Renner and Elizabeth Olsen star in a chilly backwoods murder mystery for Fargo fans. Atomic Blonde (2017): Charlize Theron stars as the blonde of the title in this update of James Bond, an ass kicking MI6 agent who is given an impossible mission during the fall of the Soviet Union.
Classic Film: Stalker (1979)
Andrei Tarkovksy’s slow moving philosophical science fiction masterpiece is a film like no other. Beautifully shot in sepia tones, and set in a grungy rusting near future, the story follows a ‘Stalker’, essentially a guide who takes those seeking life’s answers to the ‘zone’, a strange space caused by the aftermath of a meteor crashing to earth. Deep within the zone lays a room that is supposed to fulfil a man’s intellectual desires, a forbidden space almost unobtainable. Those seeking spaceships and super heroes may find Stalker a little boring, but for those looking for science fiction with brains, you really need to watch the incredibly elegant film.
Culture with Paul Berrington | 41
TV Streaming: Ozark – Season 1 After a money laundering operation goes murderously wrong, Chicago-based financial adviser Marty Byrde (Jason Bateman) is forced into a dangerous scheme to save his family by relocating to Lake of the Ozarks, Missouri and continuing to work for a ruthless crime lord, Camino Del Rio (Esai Morales), attracting the attention of local hoods and a weird FBI agent. Marty’s wife Wendy (an excellent Laura Linney) is having an affair, not that it bothers him too much, he cruises by, watches porn, cares for his kids, and launders money for a Mexican cartel. Yet unknown to Marty, his business partner is getting greedy, and when its vicious boss discovers the culprit, he decides to wipe out the entire organisation, and their families. But Marty’s a quick thinker, and strikes a deal, he’ll goes to the Ozarks and continue the operation, at an even better rate. Once there, Marty goes to work, finding businesses where he can launder money, and coming across fellow misfits and criminals as he does. And with his 12-year-old son playing with dead things, his 15-year-old daughter eager to get back to Chicago, and his wife looking for real estate, Marty has a fair bit on his plate. Adding to
his woes are Jacob Snell (Peter Mullan), a local family head, and Roy Petty (Jason Butler Harner), an oddball FBI agent, not that it bothers Marty too much, he’s coldly logical, always a step ahead of the game. Somewhere between Breaking Bad and The Sorpranos, this provocative drama takes a while to get going, but develops its own quirky edge, and showcases Bateman, as actor, director, cinematographer and producer, at his best ever.
Music: Our Recommendations
Disasteradio – Sweatshop (Not on label)
Bicep – Bicep (Ninja Tune)
Mermaidens – Perfect Body (Flying Nun)
There’s something slightly silly but also totally endearing about Sweatshop, the latest album from Wellington based Luke Rowell, who returns to his Disasteradio alias for this release for the first time in seven years. The energetic songs capture a musician who seems to revel in his own elaborate creations; pop hooks, vocoded vocal harmonies, and catchy synth melodies seem to come easily to Rowell, belying much of the effort that probably went into making it. Is it too much? Well, maybe, but it’s addictively optimistic, and delivered with such enthusiasm, you really can’t help but fall for it.
Irish duo Andy Ferguson and Matt McBriar started out as bloggers, their infamous Feel My Bicep website becoming a source of tremendous music picks and guest DJ mixes, those formative years mainly spent as tastemakers who also DJed on the international circuit. That all changed a few years back when they decided to focus more on production and their debut album shows how immersed they’ve become in this space. Always imbued with an element of melancholy, Bicep’s music brings techno and house to life in epic and emotive ways, which somehow still places them as key figures of the underground.
Wellington based trio Mermaidens made a huge impression with their infectious debut Undergrowth. Far from struggling with the expectations that may have created, the follow up, Perfect Body is a logical progression, the layered vocals of Lily West and Gussie Larkin more harmonious and confident, the crisp production complementing the band’s languid pace. Showing a big debt to Warpaint, the scattered rhythms and jangling guitar are nothing really that new, but the album never meanders off into indulgence or imitation. Perfect Body is the sound of a band maturing a little and we as listeners are benefactors.
42 | Feature
2018 MAWSA Elections:
Find out more about the student nominees The MAWSA Elections are held every year in the second semester to determine the next year’s executive team. Here is a list of candidates running for positions on the 2018 MAWSA Executive. This week is Campaign Week, so you will notice nominees doing their best to get their voice’s heard ahead of voting, which can be submitted online from September 25 to 29. These students will be your voice for the next year, so make sure to get involved, and vote!
Jack Mayo – President I am extremely proud to be writing this as your future MAWSA President. I have so many ideas to bring to office next year, whether it be more frequent sausage sizzles, new and exciting events and a more positive and diverse campus. I don’t want to just be your MAWSA President, I want to be the greatest MAWSA President. The main thing that I intend to bring is an improved student experience, I want everyone to feel that they are getting something out of uni life. I feel valued at Massey, so I want you to as well! Disability rights, gender equality and cultural appreciation are a few things key to my campaign and I promise to deliver on these issues. Vote Mayo for one fun, amazing and positive as hell 2018 lessgo!
Emma Pearce – President Hey guys and gals! My name’s Emma and I’m your current Education Vice President at MAWSA. Throughout my time at Massey, I’ve taken a passionate involvement in student life, first as an RA at The Cube, and now serving as your current VP. I’ve developed a wealth of knowledge about the university, and an awareness for the wants and needs of students. If elected as your President in 2018, I will continue to use my passion and my skills to bring even more positive change to the student experience.
Jamie-Lee Bracken Welfare Vice-President Hey guys! I’m a Bachelor of Communications student majoring in journalism, which is probably lucky because I love to chat. I also love walking my wee pup and spending time with my family and friends. It’s currently my second year here at Massey and I’m loving it. My biggest hope is that this positive view of Massey is shared by all and I aim to advocate for this to be the case. If elected, I would hope to be a warm, friendly and personable place of conversation for you to bring up points of concern or interest around student welfare. I am excited, trustworthy, organised and passionate about making every person feel looked after and supported in this community.
Key dates: September 11 - Campaign Week September 15 - Election Party September 19 - Meet the Candidates Day and President’s Debate at The Pyramid September 25 - Voting opens September 29 - Last day of voting October 5 - 2018 MAWSA Executive announced at AGM For more information head to www.mawsa.org.nz/executive/elections
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Fiona Lai Education VP
Bridget McGechan Education VP
Natasha Tziakis Business Executive
I believe I’m the ideal candidate for the position of Education - Vice President because I’m driven to lead and motivate. I’ve been a class advocate for multiple times and I’m not afraid to raise awareness, notice issues, give opinions and speak my mind. I want to be that student-mentor/big sister that is approachable as I wished back in my first year if there was an older student that could give advice or allow me to approach that person and pick their brain with questions I have for the next years of my study. I believe I can be that person as I see myself approachable, talkative, and bubbly; all around a positive person.
Hey, I’m Bridget. I am currently in my second year studying Design, majoring in Photography. This year I have loved working as a Residential Assistant at the Cube Hall. It’s been super rewarding helping students get the most out of their first year. I would love the chance to use the skills I have developed this year to improve student life at Massey. I’d be great for the role of Education Vice-President because I am an excellent communicator, energetic and curious. You should vote for me because I will explore new ideas and ways that we can make Massey provide the best possible learning opportunities.
I’m a goofy girl reigning from Miramar who is hungry for the student voice to be heard and who is also hungry for ice cream. I’m half-Greek and half-Kiwi and I’m the oldest of three kids. Being the oldest has often lead me to take charge, but it’s also made me look after my siblings and care about what matters to them. I’ll be in my third year of Journalism in 2018 which means I can keep an eye out for our new Business or Communication students, allowing me to use my caring, yet authoritative, older sister voice. We can all use our words to communicate better and I believe that with me as the Business Executive, that could happen.
Bryah-Rose Rauhihi Maori Executive Kia ora, my name is Bryah-Rose. I am from Ngati Raukawa descent and from Poutu Shannon. In my life, my main values would be kai and whanau. My biggest dream is for everyone to have a taco Tuesday, even if it isn’t Tuesday. I would describe myself as a very easy going person, who always has other people’s interest at heart. You will find I’m an approachable person, as I have a very friendly nature. Always up for a chit chat, especially since you cannot get me to stop talking at times. That’s why I think i would exceed in the role of Maori executive.
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Dylan Healy CoCA Executive
Brianna Keogh CoCA Executive
Aria Tongs CoCA Executive
Hey I’m Dylan! I’m from Wanganui and am in my third year studying Visual Communication Design. I’m applying this year to make 2018 the best uni year of your life. I’ve been inspired by what the student voice at Massey can achieve and I hope to grow that further next year as a CoCA executive. I’d love to facilitate and feedback anything our student community wants to be heard, big issue or small. I’m positive towards making change, this comes from listening and respecting others, something I pride myself on.
I’m currently a third year fine arts student. I’m very social and I love helping people who are in sticky situations. I’m from an hour north of Auckland city but Wellington is my home now, I hope to be a voice for the CoCA students and make a change around campus with varying topics including; helping students deal with high stress levels and help lecturers understand and be better equipped for learning/writing disabilities. I’m super approachable and am happy to chat anytime! Find me in the MAWSA/Co-lab area.
Hey there! I’m Aria Tongs, and I am super keen to be a voice for the College of Creative Arts. Not only do we have an unbeatable reputation here, we also have immeasurable talent (I’m not trying to suck up I promise), and opportunities galore for those of us who look out for them. Through completing a student exchange in California, and designing for Massive Magazine, I know the experiences Massey has to offer us design students, and I would love to be an advocate for all who wish to make the most of their degree and their creativity while at Massey.
Mili Tian Health Executive My name is Mili Tian and I am studying Integrated Human Health but will hopefully will do nursing next year. I love music and always practice loud noisy classical music on the grand piano in the theatre building. If you enjoy listening to Mozart and Beethoven, we can make very good friends. It would be a great honour to become the Health Executive for 2108. I am a caring person with excessive patience and willingness to help everybody out. I can be the strong support for the students included in the College of Health.
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Anna Gilmour Nursing Exec Hi I’m Anna! I’m 21 years old and recently moved to Wellington from Havelock North. I have loved being a first year nursing student and am thrilled to be nominated for MAWSA Nursing Executive 2018. After being the nursing fundamentals student representative I am excited to take on a more active leadership role in the Massey Wellington community as I love being involved and working with so many amazing people. I am a hardworking, committed and enthusiastic student. I love meeting and talking to a wide range of people and am passionate about student life and well-being. I am super excited to take on this new challenge and to have an amazing time.
Megan Hammond Nursing Exec Hey, I’m a second year nursing student who wants to be your next Nursing Executive here at Massey Wellington. Why me you may ask? I will always try speak as the voice of the students and ensure all perspectives are considered as well as offering a unique nursing view on situations and decisions. But of course, I always have a jolly good laugh and enjoy some quality banter at the same time as laughter can sometimes be the best medicine! And guys look, it’s my second year running so at this point I will happily take pity votes…..come on ya’ll vote for me!
Luisa Kose Nursing Exec Kia Ora, Talofa Lava, and Malo e lelei, my name is Luisa Kose and I am running for Nursing Executive for 2018. You may often see me in Tussock eating (my second home). I am of Samoan descent, born and raised in good old Levin and I am wanting to be your voice on the 2018 MAWSA executive team. I am very approachable and you’ll be able to hear me laughing from a mile away so I’ll be easy to find, I’m open to anything whether it’s from discussing assignments, asking for directions, Go Wellington bus routes to just fist bumping in the corridor. Let’s laugh our way through 2018 and vote for Luisa!
Bella Bolter Health Executive I am a dedicated public health student, committed to increasing student health and well-being on campus. I am into community engagement and volunteering I would like to earn your vote because I believe that one voice can change the world, but it has to start small. By being part of the exec team, I would work with the other members to ensure that we are doing the very best for students on campus and beyond. A vote for me is a vote for ensuring student health and well-being is one of the highest priorities and a vote for fostering community on campus.
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International Exec
Clara Gan
International Exec
Lauren Coetzee International Exec
Kia Ora, my name is Hamish Singh Johl and I am running for International Executive for MAWSA. I believe I should get this position not only because I am always enthusiastic, but also because I have an ambition to change and evolve things in a positive and innovative way, in addition to MAWSA’s incredible work at Massey already. Even though it’s only my first year at Massey - studying Creative Media Production, I have learnt a lot about the way Massey works and how the people adventure through their day to day lives within its grounds. Coming from the small town of Blenheim, Wellington has opened me to opportunities that allow me to present my caring and passionate personality to the widest variety of people.
Heya! I’m Clara, a first year student majoring in industrial design and minoring in music tech. I was born in Singapore, raised in Malaysia and completed high school in Christchurch. During my spare time, I love eating gelato! No matter the weather, you will find me eating gelato. I will be a great choice for International Executive because I’ve experienced and I understand the daunting feeling of leaving home and to starting a new adventure in a different country! If elected, I will make sure domestic and international students have a memorable experience at uni but also I will provide great support to international students.
I am an easy going, friendly and enthusiastic person who is ready to represent the International and cultural students at Massey University, and make sure that their voices are heard. I embarked on my student exchange adventure during 2016 to London’s University of Westminster in the second semester of my second year. It was a life changing experience that I will never forget! The only thing that I wish I could have changed, was knowing someone that could help me settle on campus and connect me with the activities offered to International students. I would be honoured to have the opportunity to enhance the experience of those that choose Massey University and New Zealand as their destination.
Hamish Johl
Matt Luani Pasifika Executive Hey my name is Matt Luani, I am 23 years of age and currently in my third year studying Visual Communication Design. This position is important to me because I am all for change. I find solace in helping my fellow brothers and sisters that are from Pacifica decent. I also like to challenge myself in finding opportunities for our students to excel through academic studies. I am a passionate Samoan student and will always find the chance to express my feelings about the Pacific culture however that may be.
Candidates Richard Cooze, Lauren Small, Moretekorohunga Lloyd and Gwen Walter David Jones did not submit blurbs and photos in time for the Massive deadline.
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PUBLISHER
CAMPUS EDITORS:
massivemagazine.org.nz ISSN-2253-5918 (Print) ISSN 2253-5926 (Online) This publication uses vegetable based inks and environmentally responsible papers. The document is printed throughout on SUMO Laser, which is FSC© certified and from responsible forests, manufactured under ISO14001 Environmental Management Systems. Massive Magazine is committed to reducing its environmental footprint.
Auckland
MANAGING EDITOR Nikki Papatsoumas editor@massivemagazine.org.nz (04) 801 5799 ext. 63765
DESIGN AND LAYOUT Aria Tongs Ashleigh Dawson massive@mawsa.org.nz (04) 801 5799 ext. 63765
MEDIA MANAGER Sarah Grant-Wang manager@mawsa.org.nz (04) 801 5799 ext. 63763
Photo Credit: https://twitter.com/i/ moments/892553371764248576
Taryn Dryfhout anotherdesperatehousewife@gmail.com
Artist Feature Hendrix Arnold
Manawatū
Modern Miss Lonelyhearts Samantha Stephens
Adam Pearse adampearse1@gmail.com Wellington Kasharn Rao kasharnrao@gmail.com
CONTRIBUTORS
Kasharn Rao, Adam Pearse, Taryn Dryfhout, Jamie-Lee Bracken, Natasha Tziakis, Katherine Dewar, Peri Miller, Paul Berrington, Hannah Colenbrander, Charlie Pearson, Bethany Reitsma.
IMAGE CREDITS Front Cover Louie Neale louienealeartist.wordpress.com Are students the key to changing politics? Rodmann Walker Everything you need to know: The 2017 General Election Phoebe Holden A Pinch of Politics Samantha Stokes stokedsamantha.com
Interview with Jacinda Ardern
Mum’s the word Louie Neale louienealeartist.wordpress.com Dilemma Doctor Aria Tongs Local News: Wellington first city to implement a compulsory WOF on student flats https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKGoY0lEJA
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