The Beestonian Issue 61 by Lord Beestonia

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for residents of beeston... and the world!

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In this festive ish... I am beeston meet our centenarian

Issue No. 61 FREE co20p18y!

Find true love in lonely hearts

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Beestonian The

hat? It’s December already? Are you kidding? Surely it was just the other day since all of Beeston’s grass turned yellow, Attenborough Nature Reserve transformed into a moonscape of slightly damp craters and finding some shade in a beer garden was a greater challenge than anything Hercules had to face.

But no, the calendar doesn’t lie and it is indeed the last month of the year. That one with crap jumpers, the evaporation of sobriety and the collective insanity of believing that a meal of pure stodge and gravy is best washed down with fortified wine and Quality Street. Put away your shorts. Stow away your suncream. Christmas is here, and it demands your attention. It’s therefore lucky that you, dear reader, have found us. If you’re new to The Beestonian and only reading this because you took one from us at the Christmas Light Switch On mistaking it for some religious paraphernalia, then hello, lovely to meet you, we are a community magazine for the local area and yes, you can buy us a drink. If you’re one of our regular readers, then ayup again, how you been? And where’s that drink you promised us? Spitting feathers here mate. Either way, we’re here to

make your Yuletide less of a slog.

Inside we’re more stuffed than a canary with a ton of Paxo up its giblet-slot, with the sort of content perfect for reading when you can’t stand listening to your racist aunt run through her latest reasons for voting Brexit between indiscreetly blowing off sprout-stinking guffs (well, at least you can both blame Brussels). We have great trees; shuttlecocks; tv fame; turning 40; steampunks; turning 100; old crosses; bird boxes; junior historians; a Korean family; and for those looking for some holiday lovin’, a Lonely Hearts column. Want some Christmas magic? Then read Daisy’s column on page 9. If you’re not getting a lumpy throat like the first time you watched It’s a Wonderful Life then seek a cardiac surgeon, cos you’re missing a heart. Santa, raise your game. We’re jonesying for the title Best Present-giver right now. So throw another log on the fire (or chuck something at the radiator if you’re a modern type), pour yourself a pint of Baileys with a Advocaat chaser and treat yourself to a whole Toblerone. We’ll be back in the New Year with a load of features on why you’re an utter disgrace for letting yourself get into such a mess over the festive period, but until then, HAPPY CHRISTMAS!! LB

EDITORIAL Lord Beestonia; lead writer and founder...

I AM BEESTON Muriel (Penney) Bartlam Centenarian

I Am Beeston

t’s not every day that you get to meet someone that is (at the time of interviewing) just about to turn 100 years old. The golden number that everyone strives for, but sadly, not many attain. I cycled up to the house, situated in a quiet part of Beeston, and was met at the door by Kay, a close friend who suggested her, and behind was Muriel, who prefers to be called by her maiden name. Not having met anyone of that age before, I didn’t quite know what to expect. But I was gratified to see that Penney is a spritely, warm and friendly person that could easily pass for someone in their late 70s. Being slightly deaf and needing the use of a wheeled walker were the only drawbacks that she appeared to have on reaching her century.

to the Lord Mayor’s secretary. This was a very enjoyable post, and I got to meet some really exciting people, like the Queen in 1947, who used my very own fountain pen to sign the visitor’s book. I also got Eisenhower to sign a menu from the Black Boy Hotel, when he visited in 1945.” “In 1953, I married Leonard, who was director of a family business that made prams. I then had a baby called Philip, and so left my Job at the Council House. Philip did very well at school, and went to Cambridge University to read History and the History of Art and Architecture. I typed out his dissertation about the Nottingham architect T.C. Hine. After graduating, Philip got a job with IPC Magazines in London. He eventually became the editor of ‘The Antique Dealer and Collectors Guide’. He was made redundant in 1990, but continued to publish the magazine under his own name. I helped to type up some of the articles, but computerisation came in, and so I had to learn how to use a computer. This was when I was in my 70s. I didn’t like the idea, but had some encouragement from friends and got used to it. I did it until I was 91. Sadly Philip died in 2009. Leonard had died in 1978, and so I decided to move to Beeston in 1979. My best friend lived in the area, so I thought I would join her. I’ve never regretted moving here. It’s such a friendly place.”

“I’ve alw ay been a fa s no the Bees f ton Players ”

We sat in her living room and started chatting. She had actually written down a lot of information for me that she had remembered. “I was born at ‘The Lodge’, which was part of the City Isolation Hospital on Hucknall Road on 12 October 1918. My father George, worked as the Lodgekeeper there, plus undertaking any other duties that were given to him. While my mum, Eliza, looked after us all. I went to Southwark Street Primary School in Old Basford. I then went to Guilford Central Girls School, where at the age of 14, I passed the E.M.E.U examination in six subjects, and was awarded the Jardine Honours Prize.”

“On leaving school, I got a job with J.B. Lewis and Sons, who were one of the largest hosiery and underwear manufacturers in the Midlands. The company then became Meridian, before being taken over by Courtaulds. Whilst working as an errand girl there, I decided that I wanted to better myself by learning shorthand and typing. So I enrolled on evening classes at Binns Business College. Attaining the qualifications, I landed a job as secretary to the Advertising and Promotions manager at Griffin & Spalding, which is now Debenhams. This was in 1936. Besides the typing, I got to book London theatre tickets, arranged after dinner speakers and entertainers for children’s parties. All for the store’s customers.” “But this all came to an end in 1939, with the start of World War II. In 1941, I used my secretarial skills for a wartime charity, which was based at the Council House. Then in 1943, I was appointed secretary

“Beeston has some good shops. When I was younger, my friend and I used to go into Beeston about three times a week with our shopping trollies. We used to like going to Fine Fare and the Co-Op. I miss Woolworths and a ladies’ clothes shop nearby, that I forget the name of. These days I go by taxi. All the assistants in Sainsbury’s know me and look after me when I visit. I also like to go to Hallams. It seems a bigger, better shop now, than when they had assistants picking the produce for you.” “I’ve always been a fan of Beeston Players, and often go to see their shows. I have some lovely friends and neighbours; 50 of them are coming to my birthday party. Talking of parties, we had a lovely street party around here, for the Queen’s diamond jubilee. Yes, I made the right decision moving here. I never wanted to live in the country. Beeston suits me fine.” CDF

The Yorkshireman Speaks SCOTT BENNETT This month the Yorkshireman takes on approaching 40...

ext year I am 40. I can’t quite believe it. I remember my mum and dad being this age, I didn’t think it would happen to me. I hoped I would be like a Yorkshire Benjamin button, a pound shop Peter Pan, but here I am, clinging onto the remnants of my thirties like a terrified toddler clutching their mothers’ hand on that first day at playgroup. Forty is a strange age, it changes how you feel about certain things. I used to go to festivals, days spent in muddy fields with nothing but a can of Strongbow and a wet wipe between three of us. Festivals at forty are different, it’s hard to be “down with the kids” when you have brought your own kids. The youth arrive on the Megabus, you’ve come in a people carrier with a roof box. You make your way through the field, holding a cool box in one hand and some fold up picnic chairs in the other. You’ve got one kid on your shoulders, another is following behind you in badly fitted wellingtons and a cagoule, any cool factor you may have managed to muster up is instantly destroyed when your wife, who is weighed down with an M and S picnic, shouts, “keep walking love, it’s way too loud here” it’s as if she is saying, “I want to find a lovely spot, well away from any kind of atmosphere.” So, you sit there with your other forty-year-old friends, huddled around the picnic blanket, holding a cucumber and dip, talking about school catchment areas whilst a band from the 90’s who weren’t successful enough to retire, massacre songs you never liked the first time around. There is a moment of excitement when one of the group brings out a hip flask, what could it be? Vodka, Whiskey, Jager? Nope….Gaviscon. “Scott I’ve got some acid” “really?!” “Yeah, reflux, that red pepper humous is really repeating on me!” It’s really odd, I’ve found myself enjoying a garden centre now, we go most Sundays, it’s just an excuse to go out. We go to the café for a brew and scone then just come home, we don’t even buy anything, no other shop offers that facility, you don’t go to B and Q for a roast dinner?

I have started walking differently too. Young people stride purposefully, hands by the side, or holding a phone, frenetic, on the move, propelled by hope and ambition. I’ve noticed I’ve started ambling, with my hands behind my back, like a pensioner on a bus trip looking in the window of an antiques shop. I’m like a geriatric Liam Gallagher, I’m literally saying my future, is behind me. I used to love playing video games, that’s all changed. Not only do I not have time to do it, I’m useless too, it’s as if my reflexes and cognitive skills have gone, I get nauseous walking around Ikea, so after playing a first-person role-playing game, I’d have to lie down for a week. I used to get frustrated watching my dad play Super Mario, he’d just be wandering around aimlessly, bumping into stuff and dying, that’s me now! All this online gaming is beyond me too, I live in a house with three women, my self-esteem is already rock bottom without having my arse handed to me by an eleven-year-old French kid whom I’ve never met. The games are so vast, some take weeks to complete, if you’ve got kids, you haven’t got time to play them. A friend of mine is married but he doesn’t care, he sits up all night drinking cans of Monster and playing games with his VR headset on. He told me he was playing this game the other week and it was so realistic that at one point a woman came into the room behind him, opened the curtains, told him to “grow up” and left with his kids. They should make some games that are more appropriate for people in their forties. Maybe things like “Ikea dash”, the idea is to get to the café before the meatballs run out and the argument bar is always on red, you might have infinite lives but every single one of them feels exactly the same. There could be a game where you have to punch other people’s kids in a soft play centre, bonus points if the parents don’t catch you. Finally, a strategy game where the main character eats a bit late and then has to ransack a medicine cabinet looking for an emergency Rennie. @scottbcomedyuk scottbennettcomedy.co.uk Find The Scott Bennett Podcast on SoundCloud and iTunes SB

the

(or Market)

lthough not a War Memorial by any means, the story of Beeston’s ‘Village Cross’ is so bound-up with that of the ‘Memorial Cross’. It is no coincidence that Beeston has a ‘cross’ as it’s war memorial or that it should stand on the site that it does. Through changes to the road layout over time, the Memorial Cross now appears to stand by the side of Middle Street. In actual fact this site was once in the middle of the road at this important roadjunction between Church Street, Dovecote Lane, West End and Middle Street. Here was once the geographical heart of the settlement that was to become the town of Beeston. In Britain, over 1,000 years ago, when Christianity began to spread among the pagan Anglo Saxons, the new faith was preached to the people from a stone pillar, (‘preaching cross’) erected in the heart of the community. This was most often close to the manor house, the home of the most important member and leader of the community. Once Christianity had been established, a parish church was built, first in ‘wattle-and- daub’ and later in stone. With the new church, preaching crosses became redundant and many took on a secular use as market crosses. We might add here that this is the evolution of many village crosses, however, there are a large number of market crosses purposefully erected to mark the place of village commerce. It is known that a village cross stood at the centre of the Middle Streets crossroads. Given the facts, it is no surprise then, to find that two of the most important buildings in the community, the Manor House and parish church are close by the site. It is suspected that Beeston’s village cross was once used as a market cross. Certainly there are clues to this effect; It is widely believed that a corn market was held nearby the site, - Until the 1860’s, Middle Street, from the Memorial Cross to its junction with Station Road was known as Market Street. The cross was removed, perhaps as a hazard to road traffic, sometime in the 1850’s and the whereabouts of its remains lost until 1929. It was in that year that part of the cross was discovered built into the wall of Manor Lodge, by the headmaster at ‘Church Street Junior Boys School’, Arthur Cossons. Cossons was an active ‘local historian’ with a passion for

Village Cross Beeston’s history. He recognised a large piece of masonry in the wall as being a part of the ‘shaft’ of a medieval cross. Proud of his discovery, Cossons had the cross shaft removed to Church Street and erected by the side of the school where it stands to this day. JN

JIMMY NOTTS Keeper of Beeston’s Secret History...

Did You Know... The shaft of the medieval cross, - marked by a Blue Plaque, can be found on Church Street, standing between the wall of the old school building and the footpath. The shaft, believed to be 14th century, is now a ‘Grade II’ listed monument. Most of the Victorian Board School was demolished in 2005, however, the headteachers house remains. A Blue Plaque, dedicated to Arthur Cossons is attached high-up on the gable wall of this building which was his home from 1932 to 1958.

Chapter 9. ‘Tis the Season...

t’s getting close, I can smell it. The faint scent of pleading in the air. The most delicate whiff of peer pressure and hope. The bold claims among school friends about which presents have been requested and which ones they will oh-so-definitely be receiving. It’s Christmas and there’s absolutely no escape. Every Christmas in our house is a day of firsts and lasts. It’s always bitter-sweet and there is no greater measurement of the passing of too-short childhood years to make me wonder if this year was a few months shorter than ususal. We only have one child, so each year we edge closer to losing her belief in Santa, the mystery grows smaller and wonder shrinks like a vacuumpacked tool set. She’s still little enough to believe, but big enough that next year she might not. Each present from Santa is precious and for a second she is tiny again, mystified by the enormity of his night time adventures. The next second she is opening a card with £10 sellotaped inside and a tiny piece of the spell falls away. Christmas with a child has been the loveliest experience. It was a stressful time growing up with divorced parents and time-share days and two dinners, always two dinners.

Now we have our own family and although we still need to try to find balance between 4 different sets of grandparents, we manage and it’s peaceful and we fall asleep after dinner just like our parents did. The hardest part of the day is trying to soak it all up, to take in her face when she opens an unexpected gift or watches her dad try on his inevitable novelty hat. To take photos but not too many, to capture the best moments but also not to miss them trying to switch the camera on. Firsts and lasts happen simultaneously with an only child and Christmas is such a huge barometer of how little time we actually have that I can’t help but feel a little sad. I’m very lucky, I know. I know that my tiny family is here and safe and loved, and I know that other’s aren’t. So, every year I will love and give and play and argue because there aren’t any promises that we have more to come. I will get annoyed at advertising and buy it anyway, I’ll buy glittery make up for my 7 year old if that make her happy, because one day she will wants £30 lipsticks and I’ll spend the day weeping into my bank statement. It’s the little things, the little lasts. They are my real present. DL

here was time when I was known as ‘Nottingham’s official Robin Hood’ (a truly wonderful job I still do, rumours of my retirement being substantially in error) but these days I’m much more likely to be known as ‘Scarlett’s Dad from that Channel 4 documentary series’ - and actually that’s quite fun. ‘Old People’s Home for Four Year Olds’ is a documentary series that was filmed in Nottingham (at the Lark Hill Retirement Village in Clifton) and featured ten residents from there aged between 86 and 102 and aimed to see if introducing them to a group of ten children aged 3-4 over a protracted period would have any effect on their mental and physical well-being. I first found out about the project (or ‘experiment’ as the producers preferred to call it) when the wonderful Roopam Carroll from the excellent Beeston Nursery (which Scarlett was attending at the time) contacted me to ask if I might be interested in her taking part, as the producers were approaching several local nurseries looking for potential participants. As you may know I lost my beloved wife Sally to breast cancer last year and I was (and still am) a bit of a mess because of it – suddenly becoming a 54-year old widower with a 4-year old after months of caring for Sal at home left me dazed, confused and directionless, so it seemed like a fine idea to suggest Scarlett might take part as it would provide her with a new adventure, new friends and a unique experience I certainly couldn’t give her myself. Apparently a couple of thousand children applied (well, their parents did) and there was a long process of careful selection and diligence on behalf of the producers - who I can’t praise enough for their compassion, caring and consideration for all the children – and eventually two were chosen from Beeston, Scarlett and Phoenix (who if you’ve seen the documentary were both featured very heavily in the first episode). We had film crews visit us at home to film background interviews and a child psychologist come to discuss what the ‘experiment’ might entail and whether Scarlett and I were genuinely happy to be

Nottingham’s official Robin Hood involved and if it was right for us. Of course one of the questions involved how it would be if one of the older participants passed away during the course of the show (an unlikely but potential happening) and how that might affect Scarlett having lost her Mum so recently. Obviously I hoped it wouldn’t (and thankfully didn’t) happen – but if it did I thought it was more likely to ‘normalise’ Scarlett’s experience than anything else. And then we got to meet the older residents, and they were an utter delight! They were (and are), as with the children, a very diverse group, some with health issues, some very shy, some full of laughter – but all curious, excited and not quite knowing what to expect. 102-year old Sylvia, who turned out to be a real star onscreen, was a joy – when I met her she told me how she enjoys visiting Lark Hill’s bar in the evening and always walks her much younger friend home to make sure she gets home safely! I asked her why she enjoyed the bar so much and she told me there were lots of widowers she could get a kiss from… and when I mentioned I was a widower she coyly pulled her long skirt up to show me a bit of ankle and winked at me! When the children met the residents too as part of the filming it was just as wonderful, Scarlett made a bee-line to 86-year old Beryl who she instantly became inseparable from – and even though filming has now finished we still see regularly both at Lark Hill (when all the parents, children and residents have a lunch and catch up together) and on our own with Sal’s Mum Joy for Sunday lunches. It’s like having a new family for us all, and is just joyous. There’s a moment in episode one where the children are asked to write party invitations for their mummies and daddies and Scarlett turns around and says, very matter of factly, that ‘my Mummy has died so I’ll make it for Daddy and Gran-Gran’. It’s shocking in its simplicity and openness and (as of writing) that clip, put online by Channel 4, has had nearly six million views. But for me, it’s the heart of why I wanted Scarlett to participate in the programme – because she’s been through such a lot but can still speak of losing Sal whilst at the same time knowing how much Sal loved her – and would be so proud of her.

I’ve never really been a fan of ‘reality’ TV but this show helped everyone involved and judging from the press and media attention it gained and the comments both online and personally I’ve seen too has helped and affected a lot of other people too, both in starting a discussion about how we shouldn’t segregate the old and the young because they both benefit hugely from such interaction, but also how we talk about the loss of a parent to children. This will be the second Christmas we’ve had without Sal now and whilst I’m still hugely bereft and lonely I’m deeply glad we’ll be surrounded by family and friends – but also a new extended family too, the promise of those bonds continuing for many years to come and lessons Scarlett and the rest of the children can carry with them for the rest of their lives. I’m certain #SalWouldApprove. Oh – and I’m not supposed to say anything – but watch out for the Christmas special, we finished filming it last week! Happy Christmas!

Creative

DEBRA URBACZ We are the Creative Champions!

Beeston

s we round off another year celebrating all that is creative in our vibrant little town, it seemed like the ideal opportunity to rejoice in the creative diversity we have in Beeston. As well as the wealth of independent shopping prospects up and down the High Road, we have artists and makers in in every corner of our suburban streets. One local creative, who has been joining me in honouring Beeston’s originality is local photographer Lamar Francois, whose image of the metal sculpture by Hilary Cartmel in Broadgate park is immortalised in his 2019 calendar.

I met with Lamar on a dazzling autumn day, which is pretty much how I remember the first photographs that I ever saw of his. I bought the 2017 urban landscapes calendar as an attractive reminder that the concrete and neon of our city, form beautiful backdrops to the monotonous moments of our daily lives. The craft behind a product like this is why I buy handmade and indeed why we should. So far removed from the over-produced flimsy printed pages in supermarkets and chain stores, this quality finished calendar represents hours of careful consideration from start to finish. Nestled neatly between a beautifully illuminated Market Square and Nottingham Castle bathed in summer sunshine, the calendar contains two Beeston related photographs but the Broadgate one is my favourite. The intricate metalwork design of the organic sculpture stands out against shade under boughs and small children play in the background, their ribbons echoing the curves within the sculptures frame. The other image gives a wider view of our local treasures, the River Trent taken from Beeston Rylands playing fields, and is equally dramatic in its own right. Lamar tells me the process of choosing the right photographs is a tough one. They have to be relatable, as well as awe inspiring, and of locations that people instantly recognise whilst avoiding clichés. Lamar’s passion for photography happened around the same time that he was living in Beeston, as a student at Nottingham University, where he now works part-time helping to manage a seed library that serves the plant science community. He originally used his phone to photograph his subjects but was curious about cameras and how these could extend his skills. He helped to run a photography society at university which gave

him the opportunity he needed. After buying his own camera, Lamar secured some Prince’s Trust finding which helped him to pay for extra equipment as well as giving him access to a business mentor, which he says has been the most valuable resource of all. As is the case with many creatives, the promotional side doesn’t always come as easy as creating a product, and this is something Lamar found especially difficult. Having Asperger’s means that he wasn’t confident socially, and this really hampered the necessity to push himself out into the spotlight. He hid safely behind the social media curtain, which did get his work out there, but it also had a tendency to be lost in a sea of images. His business mentor has helped to boost Lamar’s confidence and encouraged him to market his images by printing off and framing a series of limited edition prints for exhibiting. A decade on he is experiencing success. I asked Lamar how this made him feel and he spoke animatedly of the joy when someone shows their appreciation of your work by being willing to pay for it. Their admiration has encouraged and bolstered him to experiment more. He also feels that through networking he has met many supportive people who have offered advice and lead to collaborations, the most exciting of these being the pictorial representation of the City of Literature bid, especially as he was chosen out of many other talented photographers – I could feel his pride swell as he told me this. And so this is why we should shop at our independents this festive period. Not only are you likely to find more unique and quirky presents and be putting money back into the local economy, you are supporting our entrepreneurs and their families, helping to build communities and making an actual individual do a ‘happy dance!’ You can acquire a copy of the calendar at some of our indie shops, who also champion a number of our local creatives. It is currently stocked at Artworks on the corner of Chilwell High Road/Imperial Road Perfectly Formed at Chilwell’s Creative Corner and Two Little Magpies at the Broadgate end of the High Road. Or via Lamar’s website www.picturedbylamar. co.uk where you can also view more of his spectacular photography. DU

Beeston's

Historians

MATT TURPIN ...the Beeston TOUR GUIDE

Little

e like a bit of history at The Beestonian. Our history chap Jimmy never fails to hand in excellent content about Beeston’s back story, and we like to think that we’ve helped a little bit to bring that to life. We even devoted our last issue to the subject, and that caught the attention of some teachers who –wisely– also happen to be Beestonian “this is readers.

history is the London Olympics and a tramfree Beeston. We thought it best to try and bring the history to life. And that’s exactly what happened, from the moment Robin Hood (our Bow Selecta columnist Tim Pollard) leapt from behind a tree to yelps of surprised delight. Shouting out favourite fruit in Hallams followed; appreciation of the fantastic new street art, then adopting Bendigo boxing stances outside the pugilist-monikered an age cafebar, then clambers over the Beeman and a trip to e wher our community shop (see elsewhere in this issue). history

group “Dear people who make ancient the Beestonian” they wrote n is the Londo “Here at John Clifford School we have a wonderful group of Olympics” pupils who would really like a walk around Beeston to see some of the historical bits, which will hopefully engage them in a life-long curiosity in civic history. Can you help?”

Well, we walk it as we talk it here at The Beestonian so we logged into Google Maps, purchased a new compass and devised a route. And on a sunny autumn afternoon, met up with thirty fact-hungry five + six year olds at West End and took them on a tour of the town. No boring recitation of dates and detail though: this is an age group where ancient

Beestonian

Badges A

vailable NOW from Two Little Magpies on High Road (Just down from Metro cafe), these beautiful badges have been designed with one, simple intention: to make you look AWESOME!

They cost £1.50 - a bargain! And, whilst you’re there, have a look at all the other wonderful Christmas gifts and cards available from Two Little Magpies ...

The kids were wonderful, well behaved, funny and flattering (I’m looking at you, six-year old lad who, on being asked to guess my age, took a punt on ‘28?’). A huge thanks to the teachers, volunteers and parents who accompanied us on the trek and got us all safely from stop to stop without a single child being lost (we think). Our town is full of stories and overlapping layers of lives. We think that getting to know some of them makes our town a richer place to live – and starting that process young is no bad thing. Grab a compass and a few back issues of this fine publication, and we’ll see you en-route. MT

Lonely Hearts “Love Is All Around” sang The Troggs in 1966. It still is, judging by the number of adverts below from people putting themselves out there. If any of them take your fancy, send a £20 note for every box number you’re interested in, and you may well get a reply:

BUSY FEMALE MP (61), Charnwood. would like to meet constituents. About once every 5 years will do, sometimes more often depending on circumstances. No overweight people though. Box 2901

SEABIRD FAN (46), Bramcote. Into spotting gulls, guillemots, puffins and cormorants. Hasn’t had a sniff of a shag for years though. Box 8347 SIKH SEEKS SIKH. Box 2294

QUARRY WORKER (29), Attenborough. Love my job. Into gravel, shingle etc. Would like to meet open minded female 25-35 for weekend fun and help to write my book – ‘50 Grades Of Shale’. Box 3719

LONG EATON MAN (32), would like to meet someone not from Long Eaton. Box 2023

FRUSTRATED CHEF (38), Beeston. Really frustrated. Absolutely busting for it. It’s been ages. Can’t even look at melons any more. Please, I’m desperate. My wife will never know. She wouldn’t care anyway. Box 3427 INTO SOLDIERS? Me too. I’m a soft-boiled egg. Box 2210 FOREST FAN (26), also partial to woods and copses. Would like to meet lady called Cherry, Hazel, Holly, Rowan or Willow for tree-based fun in Sherwood. Ivy, Fern or Rose would do. Box 2853 MAGNET, very attractive. To other magnets mainly. Would also consider certain ferrous metals. Box 2296

TRAM DRIVER (29), going off the rails without love. Plenty of good points. Could you be just the ticket? Box 2854

POSTMAN (27), Lenton Abbey. Have I got a special delivery for you? Even if I have all you’ll get is a card. Box 2161

UNEXPECTED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA. If this sort of thing floats your boat, please wait for assistance. Box 2105

BEE MAN, Beeston. Loves sitting outside in all weathers, posing for photos with student freshers, and getting cacked on by pigeons. Box 2117

SHOELESS (54), Beeston. Would love to get close to a shoe shop. Can’t seem to think of anywhere to buy footwear. Box 2218

MORSE CODE ENTHUSIAST, (51) Looking for like-minded man or woman of similar age for … . _ .._ Box 4410

BUTCHER’S WIFE (42), Stapleford. Husband not bringing home the bacon. After a good bit of pork. Box 2620

APPLE LOVER (32), Chilwell. I really like small Gala, medium Braeburn, and huge Cox. Box 2200

LOVELY BIT OF CRUMPET. Just needs a bit of butter spread on me while I’m still warm. Box 4521

SCULPTURE, Beeston town centre. Used to be a water feature, but now feeling disconnected, unloved and lacking attention. Seeking someone who can make me wet again. Box 6437

GARDEN GATE. Swings both ways. Box 3382

JADE MOORE

Lianne's Life

owards the end of the year, and during the festive season, we often think about the people close to us. We meet family members that we don’t see very often, and think about people we miss. Earlier this year, I met two Beeston residents who have re-connected with a Korean friend (and poet) in a delightful, but unexpected, way.

to a new country and in some other areas it might have been different for them, but not here,” says Malcolm. The family stayed in Beeston until July 2005, but during their time here they went out on lots of day trips, both locally and places further afield like London. Sue and Malcolm would often take them out on day trips, including visiting their son’s narrowboat. When they left, it was because Lianne’s son Harry was about to start senior school.

“She wants to share her with experiences f the people o ” July 2002, Lianne Nottingham in Nottingham with

On 31 arrived her son, her sister, and niece, but moved to Beeston just under a year later, in July 2003. Her prolonged stay in England was for the benefit of her son, Harry-Kim, and niece Nicky, as the sisters wanted them to study, get their education here and experience the English culture. They moved to Highgrove Avenue in Beeston, and soon connected with their neighbours Sue and Malcolm Turner. “We take people into our hearts when we see them,” says Sue. “We treated them like family.” “We got to know them very quickly,” adds Malcolm. “They were out on a limb and if there were any problems we would help them.”

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A close friendship quickly formed between the two families, so much so that the sisters weren’t shy about knocking on Sue and Malcolm’s door to come over for a cup of tea, or watch a football match, as they were always welcome and didn’t need an invitation. “It can be very difficult coming

POETRY ROUND-UP POTTLE POETRY

Free, every first Sunday of the month, Pottle of Blues micropub With plenty of open mic slots, this is a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon listening to (or performing) poetry.

THINKING LIKE A POET WITH SUE DYMOKE

Tuesday 11 December, Beeston Library 6:30 - 8pm £10 (booking essential) Poetry workshop providing the opportunity to try out a number of poetry thinking, writing and editing activities, designed to inspire new ideas and deepen your understanding of how poets write. Bring a notebook and pen.

“In their house everything the children did at school went on the wall, the whole visit was about giving them the best education possible, and because they are only allowed one child everything goes into doing the best for that one child,” says Malcolm. Earlier this year, 13 years since they last saw Lianne, they received a letter from her, sent with a set of three books. The books are a series under the title: Korean Poet Lianne’s Life In England With Her Son. The books are written in Korean, and are based on the letters that Lianne sent to her husband while she was in England. Sue and Malcolm were overwhelmed to hear from her, and they had no idea she’d had the books published. In her letter to them, Lianne highlights the page in which she mentions them. When I met with the couple, we had a look, and found fragments of English words, including their names. “It’s a start!” says Malcolm. “We’d like to get this section translated.”

Continues...

WORD! FEATURING ZENA EDWARDS

Friday 8 March, Beeston Library £7/£5 (booking advised) 16+ WORD! – one of the longest running poetry nights in the UK – returns to Beeston Library with an International Women’s Day special. To perform on the open mic email hello@wordpoetry.co.uk.

in Beeston In her letter, Lianne asks them to donate the books to Beeston Library, as she wants to share her experiences with the people of Nottingham. In the back of the books, there are English notes thanking the ‘English friends’ she connected with, including other Beestonians who she has also sent copies of her books to. After meeting Sue and Malcolm, they got in contact with Lianne to tell her about this article, and get her permission for it to be published, and she wrote the following to be included: “This book is a love letter for people who have sent their family to England and have missed them. England is a place that gave our family the wisdom of life when we were in need of a change; a place where memories were made with friends despite the language barrier. I have written a story of our young children who have experienced English culture, and have brought a story of learning love in their pleasant and simple life, into these letters. It is an England life story that makes us feel attached despite the distance between us. I hope this story about us can bring a smile on every separated-family face. I dedicate this book to all of the friends in England and to everyone who knows me.”

This story is just one of many that will have been formed between people moving in and out of Beeston over the years, and how people from completely different cultures can become like family to one another over the space of only a few years. The friendship they shared will last for the rest of their lives, and the copies of the books in Beeston Library will be a legacy to the time Lianne spent here, and will provide comfort and solace to our current and thriving Korean community. JM

The Beestonian is... Lead Writer/Founder • Lord Beestonia Co-Founder/Resident Don • Prof J Editor • Christian Design & The Beest • Dan Business Manager • Jade History Editor • Joe Earp

Top-notch contributors this issue:

Scott Bennett/ John Cooper/Lulu Davenport/ Lamar Francois/Christopher Frost/Christian Fox/Matt Jones/Jade Moore/ Daisy Leverington/Jo Norcup/Jimmy Notts/Tim Pollard/Isaac Seelochan/ Tim Sexton/Colin Tucker/Matt Turpin/Debra Urbacz and Deman.

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Berliner, The Hive, Rye, The Hop Pole, The Crown, The White Lion, The Star, Mish Mash Gallery, The Malt Shovel, Broadgate Laundrette, Bubba Tea, The Bean, Beeston Library, Cafe Roya, Metro, Beeston Marina Bar and Cafe, Attenborough Nature Reserve, The Pottle, Greenhood, Beeston Nursery, The Victoria, Canalside Heritage Centre, Beeston Community Shop (formally Thorntons), Oxfam Books, L’Oliva, Two Little Magpies, Local not Global, John Flynn Opticians, Out of this World, lots of hairdressers and suchlike. ... If you’d like to be a stockist, let us know by emailing thebeestonian@gmail.com

Extract from 'Treasure Trove (Number 4 Ellis Grove)' by Steve Plowright I rummage further through the treasure trove and other scenes I find Big sister Sheila and little me both kneeling by my bed Looking for Santa and his reindeers in the Christmas evening sky And later on, tucked up in bed that selfsame Christmas Eve (And I swear to this day I dreamt it not and really do believe) That I clearly heard the jingling bells and looking through my window I surely saw Old Santa Claus a driving of his team With twinkling stars all falling out behind his gleaming sleigh.

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Beeston

Badminton Club

t this time of year, with the weather becoming murkier and with many people hopelessly looking to maintain new year’s resolutions, indoor sports will become increasingly popular.

Badminton is one of the most popular indoor sports in which you can have fun with friends whilst keeping fit. Beeston Valley Badminton Club meet up twice a week every Monday and Thursday at Chilwell Olympia. The club has a strong membership with around 40 members and like many sports clubs around Beeston, their history stretches beyond the 21st century. “Beeston Valley BC has been part of the 'Beeston badminton scene' since 1947, when the club was set up at the Valley Mission Church on Queen's Road, now a nursery opposite Humber Road” said membership secretary Alison Bexon. “My uncle started the club as a church social group after he played badminton with some Canadians with whom he was stationed during WWII. As more players joined, the club entered teams into the Nottinghamshire Badminton Association Leagues. My parents met at the club and I also met my husband here too.” Badminton, whilst being no means an easy sport to play, is perhaps more enjoyable to participate in than many other sports as even if you struggle to play, it gives you a chance to socialise. “We’re here to be competitive because otherwise we wouldn’t play in the league, but it’s important that we have a social side as well” said Alison. “Everybody gets on with everyone. If you’re not good enough to play everybody has a place and everybody has an opportunity to play, but it’s also about encouraging people who want to take that next step where rather than coming

and hitting a shuttle about with friends they want to take it a bit more seriously.” I went on a Thursday night but being half term, I was told that regular coach Mick had gone away for the day, so the coaching duties fell to Ric Latham, a player at the club who got involved in coaching through a Primary School he used to work at. “I’m quite a mental sided coach so I do a lot in terms of the anticipation side of things. Say you have to keep the shuttle low, having that in mind for your anticipation for your own team and then bringing that altogether at the end where you’re being told what shot you’ve got to play while also having to listen out for the shot being played on the other side.” During the session, everyone has to decide whether they were attacking or defending which Ric explains, “generally, if you’re attacking you will be hitting the shuttle down looking to hit the floor and to score, whereas if you’re defending, you’re really just looking to try and repel that and usually you’ll see the shuttle going upwards.” Club members also get a chance to socialise with each other off the court, with a trip away during May being referred to as ‘the May trip.’ “It’s a non-Badminton thing. It’s about finding a cottage in the country somewhere around the UK and spending a week or a long weekend in May walking, socialising, eating, drinking, a whole mix of things so it’s very sociable, but we never play any badminton, we play tennis but never badminton!” Said long-time club member James Capel. Beeston is the home to many sports clubs, but few are as popular and enjoyable to be around as this one. The club is a fantastic ambassador for badminton in Beeston. IS

ISAAC SEELOCHAN Beeston’s social Badminton Club with a competitive edge

“A Culture is no better than its woods” W. H. Auden

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or this evergreen seasonal column of Trees of Beeston, I want to celebrate those arboreal wonders that exist in our streets and gardens, public parks and along train-tracks and verges that are non-deciduous. In particular, I want to celebrate the pine tree, which, given its connection with December and winter festivities such as the winter solstice and Christmas, seems entirely appropriate for this issue. While deciduous trees shed their leaves in the autumn providing valuable mulch in the form of leaf litter and ground cover for hibernating small mammals and insects, evergreen trees and plants enrich our botanical landscape by retaining their leaves all year round, providing hedging and wildlife habitats. Think of the Pine and Firs, the Yews, the Holly trees and bushes, (*whispers, even the much maligned but much used Leylandii or Leyland Cypress*) the snaking vines of Ivy, or Mediterranean evergreens that have made their way into the gardens and landscapes of the British Isles such as the life-affirming herb Rosemary, the Myrtle or Juniper. These evergreens all provide cover as well as offering cones and berries for over-winter sustenance for those non-migratory birds who remain in the colder northern climates: the robins, wrens, blue-tits, blackbirds. When the snow falls, it is their needled and leaf-covered branches that hold the snow and keep the pavements below and around them less frozen and in turn less slippy for pedestrians venturing out on wintery days.

As the nights draw in, and the season turns colder in the northern hemisphere, us humans become a little more in touch with our animal souls: the need for hibernation, of taking stock, the desire to hunker down and, if we are fortunate, to take some rest and respite from the rude world, sat near a wood burning fire, a glass of something warming close by. By December, thoughts turn to bringing one particular kind of tree into the home to decorate with lights and baubles, and most often, it is the pine tree we think of. This December column of Trees of Beeston is dedicated to celebrating the Scots pine (Pinus sylvestris/ Guibhas). There is considerable variation within this species, and it is the most widely distributed conifer in the world, its natural range spanning the Arctic circle and ranging all the way down to the Mediterranean. Scots pines can average a height of 20m and live for between 250 – 300 years. In its first 60 – 80 years, the tree resembles its recognisable conical shape, as it ages, it develops a tall, straight trunk of pinkish-brown bark with an impressive canopy of blueish-green needles, giving it an attractive and striking appearance in a wintery landscape otherwise drained of colour. Here in Beeston, we have a very impressive example. Situated next to Beeston Parish Church on the corner between Styring Street and Chilwell Road, it can be admired from the tram and buses coming into and out of Beeston interchange. Standing proud and tall, indicating it has been in its current location for over a century given its scale and maturity, it acts as landmark and physical reminder of times past and passing time. One has to look up to truly appreciate it. The physical act of looking upwards gives perspective: it is an old and valued member of Beeston, and one to give respectful dues. The Magpies and crows love it as both a vantage perch and calling point, and it is rather lovely to sit near and revere, to meet folks under, to have alfresco lunch in the warmer months, to take time under between the school run, shopping excursions or when waiting for public transport.

Tree facts: Trees of Beeston #3 The wonders of the Evergreen and the Scots Pine of Beeston Parish Churchyard (Styring Street/Chillwell Road). The tradition of dressing a tree to celebrate the season of winter is a long one. Looking to the Scandinavia, stories and traditions abound: Think of Hans Christian Anderson’s The Fir Tree, a classic story, reminding us all to celebrate our talents and to make the most of our time. Closer, in the British Isles, stories are abundant. Ancient Greek and Roman lore has it that the pine tree is closely connected with fertility. Druids are said to light fires under Scots Pines at the winter solstice to celebrate the passing of the seasons and to draw back the sun. Tree dressing and decorating a Scots pine with twinkling lights and candles, shiny objects, and a star become representations of divine light and the eternal hope of light in darkened times. Tree dressing is a seasonal ritual bringing people together to marvel at the lights, and to ponder the hope the lights and the evergreen give.

Medicinally, pine has been used to treat respiratory problems, used as an inhalant as well as an antiseptic or disinfectant (which is why so many household products retain the scent of pines today). The smell of pine needles is also one that is attached to making people feel uplifted, ideal when the dark nights and wintery weather can lead to feelings of despondency and seasonal depression. While there are now many kinds of pine tree to bring into the home (some with bold claims of non-drop needles, or plastic varieties, which all, still somehow manage to drop their needles), it is important to think about how your pine tree might be of use beyond Christmas. If you have a garden and some space, you can of course think about buying a live tree, potting it on (not necessarily planting it out), and having it outside to enrich the local wildlife. If you prefer a cut tree, there are still uses for the tree after the 12 days of Christmas is up. The tradition of the Yule Log is still retained in parts of this country and northern Europe where the pine tree is left to season and burnt the following winter to provide a warming source of light and heat. The smell of a pine burning also gives added pine aroma to a room. The pine needles, once dried, can be used by gardeners wishing to make their soil more acidic – or ericaceous – by mixing them into compost or loamy soil when planting up blueberries in the early spring for summer home-grown berry consumption.

, “Medicinally n pine has bee at used to tre respiratory problems”

In England, Scots pines were used as landmarks for route-ways: planted along the boundaries of fields as well as along droving routes to guide farmers and their herds to markets. In Scotland, their forested form provides unique ecosystems for the rare and wondrous crossbill and a glorious unique biome for Highlands animals, as well as providing forested materials for trade and for human use.

The Scots pine has been deemed a vital construction material as the wood grows relatively quickly and its high resin content (that lovely, life-giving pine oil smell and sticky substance from the needles) means that the wood is slow to decay (think about this when you see the remains of a Christmas tree still littering gardens in March!). The wood has been used in the making of ships: from masts to planking, while the resin from the sap of the tree was used to make pitch, to seal beer casks and the hulls of boats. Archaeologists have even found the hollowed out trunks of Scots pines used as drainage pipes. The soft pulp of a pine is also used in paper production.

So hang the lights high, marvel at the enriching wonder of a Scots pine and its relative the festive Christmas tree, and wishing all readers a peaceful and loving Christmas and a hope-filled and treeenriched 2019. . Dr JN

#3 The Scots Pine Latin / Gallic name: Pinus sylvestris/ Guibhas. Appearance: Up to 80 years of age, it is conical in shape, resembling popular drawings of Christmas trees. Blueishgreen pine needles flank its branches that are thin as they rise up the tree, and its trunk is a reddish-brown, solid wood. Mature specimens have tall trunks that lead to a canopy of needle cover (see the Scots Pine in Beeston Parish Churchyard).

Uses: Annual Winter festivities see the most popular celebration of the Scots pine or conifer/fir trees as ‘the Christmas tree’ being brought into homes and work-places and dressed in lights and decorations. This continues of the ritual of celebrating the winter months by bringing in a tree and the lighting of a fire, symbolic of warmth (the yule log) and eternal hope given by the light in the extended dark nights of winter. The Scots pine is a useful timber for making paper and the resin has antibacterial and disinfecting medicinal properties and has an uplifting smell.

References: Edlin, H.L (1973) Collins Guide to Tree Planting and Cultivation. Gardeners’ Book Club. Martynoya, F (2011) A Handbook of Scotland’s Trees. Saraband Books. Nunnally, T(2004). The Fir Tree. From Fairy Tales by Hans Christian Andersen. Penguin Classics. www.woodlandtrust.org.uk/visitingwoods/trees-woods-and-wildlife/ british-trees/native-trees/scots-pine

LULU DAVENPORT BOOOO-AT and Horses...

rghhhhh it’s upon us!! Theres no hiding now! Christmas has well and truly landed, and as you feast (... of Stephen..) your gaze over this mighty fine publication (doesn’t it look shiny and awesome!!), the festive season will have invaded homes along with trees, tinsel, relentless adverts, good will (dunno who he is) and glitter, o so much glitter!! Then theres the music and Michael Buble... Don’t even get me started.... However nestled in-between the long hazy days of summer and the impending stress inducing retail holiday shop was a lovely time of year. I particularly like Autumn, with its cosy nights in, pretty fireworks and more importantly Halloween, the only time of year I can say the bags under my eyes are part of my outfit, theres also the parties and one in particular caught my eye over in ‘ta Ryland’s at the Boat and Horses on Trent Road the first special steampunk spook-tacular social event ( now say after an eggnog) to be held on Saturday 27th October. Having changed hands quite a few times in the last few years, B+H has recently has a sexy new refit widening its appeal with real ales and gins. Being a keen steampunk enthusiast, I headed over dressed to kill in a basque, long flowing dress and loads of fake blood and of course goggles. The Boat had really taken a lot of time to decorating every spare space with creepy ornaments, and even hiring a few zombies to terrify bystanders. Set up in the function room was the stalls with all things steampunky from creations, hats, clothing and beautiful handmade goodies. On stage, Sir Gregory master of ceremonies and his subordinate lackey Doc Cogs performed tea duelling, for those unfamiliar to the duel, biscuits are chosen and dunked in tea and the winner is those with the unsoggiest erm biscuit, this may seem tame but many a relationships and friendship have been lost in a tea duelling battle... In the main bar live music from that acoustic punk performer Paul Carbuncle,

the always entertaining Pixie Styx, a few of the corndodgers and Subway Circus along with Boats On The Ocean taking the music far into the dead of night. Right before I ramble on even more, there's an apology due from myself to Berliner from last issue as (eeekk) I did a whooopsie (not quite sure how I’ve morphed into Frank Spencer but anyhoo) I wrongly stated that their Oktoberfest was Friday 21st to Sunday 23rd September when in fact it was the weekend after!!! My bad as the kids say. As I ended my last piece with saying I was scuttling off to the beer festival at the Victory club I did as promised and accidentally fell in on the last day, when lo and behold the ales were reduced to an awesome ONE POUND!! a pint, quickly a flying visit turned into a mammoth drinking session with the only food consumed being a bag of mini cheddars. The next morning I woke up nursing a hangover and finding myself a fully fledged member of the Victory club it set me back £11 for the year, the moral of the story is there is no such thing as a cheap pint. It worked out well in the end as I decided to make use of my membership by checking out heavy rockers V8 when they stopped off at the venues classic rock night which is every third Friday. Moshing for two hours to System of a Down and Motorhead covers has helped ease my mourning for the Greyhound slightly... What adventures are next? I dread to think! ‘Till next time, enjoy the silly season and whatever you do, don’t you open that trapppppdoooorrr!! LD

OXJAM T

hanks to everyone who helped make Oxjam Beeston 2018 a spectacular and recordbreaking success: volunteers, artists, venues, sponsors and customers.

We have BEATEN last year’s record amount (£22000) and gone past

£100,000!!

...raised in total over 8 years. The final 2018 total will be published in early December after our last two events (‘Classical Oxjam’ and ‘Oxjam Ceilidh’) have happened. CT

COLIN TUCKER OXJAM in the House...

CODEWORD#61

beestumped 1. T he 1667 epic poem concerning Adam, Eve and Satan was called what? 2. That poem inspired a series of novels involving a girl called Lyra and her daemon Pan. Who wrote it? 3. T hat author studied at a university well known for its alumni of famous actors, including the daughter of which former local thespian turned mural? 4. Another subject of the mural opposite Tesco famously designed the chairs for which Nottingham cinema? 5. The Mayhem Film Festival regularly plays there and last year played the classic film Suspiria, but who directed it? 6. Suspiria has been remade to be released this year, the music of which has scored by which member of the band Radiohead? 7. L ead guitarist of that band Johnny Greenwood is also well known for his film scores on the films of which Auteur director? 8. Their first collaboration ‘There Will Be Blood’ was inspired by a novel by which 20th Century author? 9. P aul Dano starred in ‘There Will Be Blood’. Before that he played what famous musician in ‘Love & Mercy’? 10. Finally, that band had their first hit with ‘Surfin USA’ in January 1963, only 2 months before the debut album of what band?

THIS IS IT: THE HARDEST QUIZ IN BEESTON! DO NOT SPILL ITS PINT!

ANSWERS: Paradise Lost/Philip Pullman/Richard Beckinsale/Broadway/ Dario Argento/ Thom Yorke/Paul Thomas Anderson/Upton Sinclair/ Brian Wilson/The Beatles

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