4 minute read
FAMILY CAN BE OUR GREATEST TEACHERS: Stepping Into You
BY BHAVNA MEGH // PHOTO: MATTHEW O'DONNELL
Family has an uncanny ability to push our buttons, don’t they? Even after all the inner work, personal growth, and self-awareness we’ve cultivated, they can still provoke us like no one else. You might walk into a family gathering feeling centred, only to hear something like, “Aren’t you looking after yourself?” as your mum looks at your face, or your brother dismissing your opinion with, “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sound familiar?
To be clear, family can also be our biggest support system, but that’s not what this article is about. This is for those moments when it feels like they’re getting under your skin. You find yourself in the same emotional tug-of-war that you experienced as a child, but this time, instead of throwing a tantrum, you must respond as an adult. Maybe you even bite your tongue… or at least try to.
Take my brother, for instance. In 2016, we talked about my not going for a colonoscopy. I had shared with him how amazing I felt and that my intuition told me I didn’t need the procedure. After two failed attempts to have an appointment confirmed and receiving excellent blood and stool results, I felt at peace with my decision. But my brother, in his firm conviction, questioned me, “But how do you know you’re well?”
My repeated, “Because I feel well,” wasn’t enough for him. He needed medical confirmation. A year prior, his doubts might have swayed me. I probably would have booked that appointment again, overriding my inner knowing. But I’ve come to trust myself so deeply that I no longer feel the need to fit into someone else’s version of reality— even when that someone is family.
LEARNING TO ACCEPT AND LETTING GO OF CONTROL
Looking back, I realise how far I’ve come in communicating with my family. I’ve learned to accept them for who they are and their choices. I’ve grown to a place where I can allow them to be themselves, just as I want them to allow me to be myself. It may not sound like the most significant revelation, but it’s made a world of difference in my relationships. Letting go of the need to change them or gain their approval has been freeing.
So, how do we take the discomfort, irritation, and frustration our family triggers and transform it into something meaningful? How do we shift from being reactive to embracing these moments as opportunities for growth?
TRANSFORMING TRIGGERS INTO PERSONAL GROWTH
It’s simpler than you might think. It starts with awareness. When those emotions arise, pause and ask yourself, “What part of me is creating this experience?”
This isn’t about overanalysing or trying to rationalise the situation. It’s about noticing. Let the insights come. You might recall a childhood memory of being yelled at or the time you were left alone for what felt like the scariest five minutes of your life. Perhaps you remember feeling less cared for than a sibling, always believing their needs were more important than yours.
Whatever the insight, this is the part of you that needs attention, love, and healing. When you nurture that inner wound, the dynamic with your family softens. The relationships we crave—whether with a parent, sibling, or other family member—begin to flourish.
Why? Because we’re no longer holding onto pain or hurt. There’s more room for love when we release the old stories we’ve been carrying. Family is often our greatest teacher. Yes, they provoke us, but they also offer us invaluable lessons—if we’re willing to lean into them. So, the next time your family pushes your buttons, consider it a golden opportunity for growth.
And if you ever need support in turning these insights into peace, wisdom, love, and grace, reach out to me. Together, we can transform the triggers into your greatest personal breakthroughs.
With hugs, love, and magic!
Bhavna xx
Are you tired of family pushing your buttons? Stop feeling triggered and take back your power. Visit the website for a FREE transformational call and learn how.
