Parenting NH August 2018

complimentary

Teen Tscientist een scientist is is lightyears years light ahead ahead Your teen’s first job

A conversation with musician Laurie Berkner It’s fairs and festival time

August • 2018

Young Writer’s Contest: Details, page 4

AUGUST departments

3 From the editor’s desk

4 The short list

6 I want that

38 Dad on board

39 Raising teens & tweens

40 House calls

42 Out & about

Contents features 24 8 Meet Julie Sage, teen scientist

14 The dangers of vaping

19 Your teen’s first job

Make the first day of school easier

31 Q+A with musician Laurie Berkner

On the cover: On the cover: Julie Seven Sage, 14, of Nashua. Photo taken at MakeIt Labs in Nashua (www.makeitlabs. com) on Thursday, July 5, by Kendal J. Bush Photography. Check out her work at www.kendaljbush.com.

keep in touch ParentingNH.com

35 Late-summer fairs and festivals

facebook.com/ParentingNH

44 Time out

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©2018 McLean Communications, LLc Parenting New Hampshire Magazine® is published by McLean Communications, 150 Dow St., Manchester, NH 03101, (603) 624-1442. All rights reserved.

Reproduction in whole or in part without the written permission of the publisher is prohibited. The publisher assumes no responsibility for any mistakes in advertisements or editorial. Statements/opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect or represent those of this publication or its officers. While every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of the information contained in this publication, McLean Communications, LLC.: Parenting New Hampshire Magazine disclaims all responsibility for omission and errors.

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from the editor’s desk There’s a science to raising a well-adjusted teen Teens are often described as being sullen, moody, and lazy. Sometimes rebellious, they dislike their parents and school; they always follow, never lead; can’t make decisions on their own, and often have no direction.

But talk to enough teens and you find out they are complex. Each has different skills and talents and personalities. And some have already accomplished more than many adults have in their lifetime.

Enter, Julie Sage.

I heard of then-13-year-old Julie in the spring through a story in the Union Leader about her placing in the National Science Foundation’s comic contest. She talked about having a science show on YouTube, wanting to be an astrophysicist and how important is to have females work in STEM fields. I had to check twice to make sure that I read her age correctly.

I decided to ask Julie if she wanted to be interviewed for a story for ParentingNH’s annual teen and tween issue (see story, page 8). Julie and I emailed quite a bit back and forth. Her emails were polite and well-written. Her exuberance for science was evident in our correspondence.

After receiving a laundry list of accomplishments and activities she is involved in, I jokingly replied to her that I did not know when she slept. Julie told me she sleeps but she doesn’t watch television or movies. In fact, recently in her spare time she has been grinding a mirror to build a telescope — I had never felt guilty about my reality TV habit until that moment.

She is passionate about science and she doesn’t care who knows it, or what anyone thinks of her. Not all of Julie’s classmates share her maturity level or understand her single-mindedness, and that can make it tough for her at times. But she remains undeterred in her quest to be the next Neil deGrasse Tyson.

I started to wonder what magic formula Julie’s parents used to raise such a selfassured, driven young adult.

Julie decided at age 6 that studying space was in her future. Her parents say even at that age they took her seriously; they encouraged her and did what they could to feed her never-ending need for knowledge.

In a world where teens are often underestimated in what they can learn or achieve, and where not enough females are being encouraged to study and work in STEM fields, Julie is a reminder that we need to treat people as individuals and we shouldn’t make assumptions. Most importantly, caring and involved parents can make all the difference in a child’s success.

contributors • august Melanie Plenda is an award-winning freelance journalist and mom based in Keene. Her work has appeared in The Atlantic.com, The Daily Beast, American Baby, and Parents. com among other media outlets.

Crystal Ward Kent is a freelance writer who has written for numerous local and regional magazines. She owns Kent Creative in Dover, a creative services agency providing writing, design and marketing, and is also the author of several books and children’s books.

Bill Burke has been writing the awardwinning Dad on Board column since 2008, and is the author of the Mousejunkies book series. Bill is also the managing editor for custom publications for McLean Communications in Manchester.

Jacqueline Tourville is a freelance writer, children’s book author and longtime contributor to ParentingNH. Her specialty is discovering and writing about fun activities and events for families in New Hampshire.

Melanie Hitchcock, Editor

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the short list

compiled by melanie Hitchcock

Don’t miss out! Vote for your Family Favorite by Aug. 15

This month on www.parentingnh.com:

Enjoy the last days of summer

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Local organizations and businesses play a key part in making the Granite State a fantastic place to live and raise your family. And we want you to tell us who you think is the best of the best.

Now in its eighth year, our Family Kids will head back to school later this month, so now is the time Favorites reader poll at www.parentingnh. com is open through Wednesday, Aug. 15. to squeeze in some last-minute summer fun activities.

Readers can cast their votes for New Go to www.parentingnh.com/summer to find HAMP Hampshire’s best in more than NE W SH out where you can go and what you can do to make NG 50 categories including Out & the most of the rest of season. It’s not too late to take About, Baby Stuff, Birthday Fun, Shopping, Activities & Learning, a road trip in the Granite State, or try out that swimFamily Services and Restauming hole or bike trail on your to-do list. Also, check rants. What’s the best indoor out the digital edition of our Family Summer Fun play park? What’s your favorite Guide if you haven’t already picked up your copy at restaurant? Where do you go on one of the Welcome Centers around the state. date night? We want to know!

Everyone who completes our survey is entered to win a Premium Birthday Party Package from Nuthin’ but Good Times in Merrimack.

Look for ParentingNH’s Family Favorites in ParentingNH.com facebook.com/ParentingNH twitter.com/ParentingNH the November issue.

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for even more fun

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Breathe New Hampshire Receives $25,000 CVS Health Community Grant

Enter PNH’s essay contest and be on our cover: Deadline is August 8

Children of Yankee Publishing Inc. or McLean Communications employees are not eligible.

A New Hampshire history lesson for kids New Hampshire author Mike Edgecomb had an idea 20 years ago that has finally come to life. To Fly on a Cloud: New Hampshire is a book where kids can learn about New Hampshire in a way they never thought was possible.

It is almost time to walk to school. Jacob glances out the window and sees his friend, but also sees something more alarming. Violent storm clouds are approaching! He runs out his front door to save Max, but it is too late. At the last second they get scooped up by Bandit and begin the adventure of a lifetime.

Bandit, a magical cloud, becomes a friend and guide as they visit and learn all about New Hampshire.

Edgecomb says when he was in elementary school, reading history books wasn’t very interesting, so he hopes this book will help encourage kids to read more and enjoy it. To Fly on a Cloud: New Hampshire is available at online booksellers, bookstores and at www. toflyonacloud.com.

Breathe New Hampshire, a century-old nonprofit dedicated to lung health, has received a $25,000 grant from CVS Health.

The grant is part of Be The First, CVS Health’s $50 million, five-year initiative to help deliver the nation’s first tobacco-free generation and extend the company’s commitment to help people lead tobacco-free lives.

The support from CVS Health will help Breathe New Hampshire continue its mission of preventing youth nicotine addiction through public awareness and education.

Vaping Unveiled is a program created to educate youth, parents, schools and the community about the dangers of youth nicotine addiction through vaping e-cigarettes, “juuls,” and other devices. To offer a Vaping Unveiled presentation in your community or school, call Breathe NH at 669-2411 or go to www.breathenh.org. (For more information on vaping, see related story on page 14.)

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ParentingNH is hosting its fourth annual essay writing contest. If you are a Granite State kid who loves to write, we want to put the spotlight on you!

Winners will be chosen from three age groups: age 7 and younger; age 8-11, and age 12 and older. A winner from each of these age categories will have their essays published in the September issue of PNH. Additionally, an overall winner will be selected – their essay will also be published and they will be photographed for the cover of ParentingNH’s Back-to-School issue.

The essay topic is: What is your most prized possession? Tell us about it. Why is it important and meaningful to you? You can write about who gave it to you, describe what it is and what it looks like, where you keep it, and why you can’t live without it.

Winners will be contacted via email or phone on Thursday, Aug. 9; the photo needs to be taken by Friday, Aug. 17, to make our print deadline.

Contest rules: • Essays must be 100 to 300 words.

• Submissions must be received via email or postal mail by Wednesday, Aug. 8, at 5 p.m. Email to editor@parentingnh.com with Writing Contest in the subject line; or mail to ParentingNH Editor, McLean Communications, 150 Dow St., Manchester, NH 03101.

• All essays must include the child’s name, age, grade level, name of school they attend (or home school), parent’s name, address and phone and email.

For more information, go to www.parentingnh.com.

Y CONT

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I want that

compiled by melanie Hitchcock

Music to cuddle up to Virtuoso Bears, with the adorable likeness to Amadeus Mozart and Ludwig van Beethoven, each contain 40 minutes of carefully selected tracks of sonatas, concertos and symphonies. Easy to operate and the music device is safely concealed in an interior pocket. A short biography of their namesake artist is tucked inside.

Available at www.amazon.com; $49.99

New reward system Trying to motivate children to behave can be frustrating.

Instead of yelling or time outs, try something new. Kudo Banz is similar to a sticker chart, but for your child’s wrist. Buy the starter kit then download the free Kudo Banz magical app so kids can unlock other awards and bring them to life. For age 3 to 10.

Available at www.kudobanz. com; $29.95 for starter kit

It’s OK to be shady Trying to read your smart phone in the sun can be nearly impossible. myFlipShade has a pop-up shield that prevents glare, weather conditions and even peeping eyes from getting to your screen. It attaches to the back of the phone and flips around to provide a shield, then folds up behind the phone when not in use.

Several styles available.

Available at www.amazon. com; $9.99

Allergy-friendly celebration

Faster-drying flip-flops

ColorKitchen has introduced its naturally sourced, dye-free, Red Velvet and Confetti packaged gluten-free cake mixes. The mixes are non-GMO and contain more than 90% organic ingredients. ColorKitchen also offers plant-based coloring options, ranging from food colors and party packets to decorative sprinkles. Find recipes on the website.

Look trendy while keeping th germs away with these fashionable flip flops. Showaflops have drainage holes to dry faster and antimicrobials to protect feet from bacteria on floors and prevent odors.

Showaflops also have slipresistant soles for wet slippery floors. Several styles for kids, women and men.

Available at www.color kitchenfoods.com; $11.99

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Available at www.showA flops.com; $22-$34

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Watch out, universe – here comes Julie Sage At 14, the aspiring astrophysicist has already made her mark

By Melanie Plenda

F

ourteen-year-old Julie Seven Sage of Nashua has been given an awesome responsibility for someone so young.

She has been tasked with protecting something precious. You could call it a light. As hard as it is to guard this light, she dutifully does her job. She fattens its belly with a steady diet of study, knowledge and passion. She lets it out to stretch its rays into deep, dark corners of the universe where answers await discovery. She protects it like a tiger with her cub from those who wish to see it extinguished.

All of this comes with a price, but this light — her love for and understanding beyond her years of science — is worth it. Because the more she nurtures this light, the brighter and more powerful it becomes, until one day it just might, just maybe, do nothing less than save the world.

That’s not far-fetched given what she’s already accomplished. Her experiments won a spot on NASA sounding rockets, not once but twice; she won the Mars Generation’s 24 Under 24 Innovators in STEAM and Space Advocacy Award; she’s working at the MIT Media Lab to build a CubeSat for climate science; she won the Discovery Education 3M Young Scientist Challenge for her Sage Survival System invention; and she runs her own web-based science news program.

“Science can do almost anything,” she wrote in her original comic Estron, featuring the eponymous superhero scientist, which won second place in the middle school division of the National Science Foundation’s Generation Nano: Superheroes Inspired by Science comic contest, “But it takes the person to make something of it.”

“Watch out world,” she wrote, “Estron has landed.”

Science from the start There isn’t a time that Julie remembers not loving science.

“Really I don’t know when the first time it was that I got interested in science; I’ve just aaallwaays been interested

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in science since I was born,” Julie said, with the emphasis another teenager might apply to a favorite boy band. “Really what spoke to me was the mysteriousness of it all. There’s so much that we don’t know and I want to discover so much and also I just find it super cool. I find science cool in general, but I just have a pull towards it. I just love it so much.”

She read her first book on her own at age 3, although she’d shown signs even earlier than that, said Sage’s mom Christina, a mechanical engineer by profession.

“Even before she turned 1, you could see her with her finger, following the writing, so she knew it was significant,” Christina Sage said, and jokes. “My husband [Daniel Sage] and I were like, ‘Oh, boy. We’re in trouble.”

Christina said Julie was a voracious reader, which led to daily walks to the library with her dad to satisfy her appetite. She really loved all books, but when she discovered space books, it was different.

“Oh my gosh, when she found space — forget it!”

Christina said. “Her eyes were so wide open. …She was just soaking it up.”

She soaked up so much that, as her mom tells it, Julie at age 5 noticed an error in one of her books on the solar system. The book said the sun was made of gas. Julie begged to differ — it’s made of plasma (and she’s right). Christina said Julie would not leave it alone until her mother agreed to write the company asking them to fix it.

“One of the editors responded,” Christina said, laughing with great pride at the memory, “and they said, ‘thank you very much for catching that. Yes, we do know that the sun is made of plasma, however the audience that they were going toward doesn’t quite understand that yet.’”

But Julie did.

“They said, ‘you want to come work for us?’” Christina said.

But it wasn’t until the wise old age of 6 that Julie landed on what her exact scientific path would be. As she recalls it, she was sitting with her dad, whose full-time job she said is “taking care of me.”

With some finality, she announced to him that she knew

‘‘

…even if people are telling you that you can’t, but you really want to and you believe you can, and you know you can do it, then do the work.

— Julie Sage

Julie is shown here at MakeIt Labs in Nashua using a laser cutter to cut her network logo out of plastic.

Photo courtesy of Kendal Bush

’’

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what she wanted to be when she grew up and that it would have to do with space. He assumed she wanted to be an astronaut. No, she said —Village too dangerous.

He explained to her what an astronomer does and Summer Camp is back at Gymnastics with half and full day options (9am-3pm)!that Designed still for didn’t sound quite right. boys and girls from 6 to 14, kids will participate “He said, ‘well then, what do you want to do?’” Julie recalls, “And I in gymnastics rotations, fitness activities, Ninja said, ‘I want to know how all the stars move and I want to know how Challenge obstacle courses, games, crafts, party everything apparatus like our inflatables, zip-line and more. works. And I want to know how the universe works and I want to know all the calculations behind it.’

Registration for summer camps and recreational “He said you want to be an astrophysicist … ‘you mean like Neil classes begins April 1st. Call 603.889.8092 deGrasse Tyson and Stephen Hawking?’ because I knew who they or visit gymnasticsvillage.com. were at the time. And I’m like, ‘yeah, like that.’ So ever since then I wanted to be an astrophysicist.”

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To encourage this, Christina said she and her husband simply entertained and answered their girl’s questions, however advanced, however out there. If she exhausted their knowledge, they’d get her to a computer or book, lift her up on their laps and show her how to look up the answers for herself.

By age 10, she was ready for her first online class at Harvard: Super-Earths and Life.

“I got a 96 percent,” she said of the class. “The next year, I met the professor and he told me that most of the underclassmen who actually took that class with him in real life, actually failed the class.

So he was very impressed.”

When it came time for in-person schooling, however, things weren’t so easy. The academics were fine — she’s a straight-A student. It was the kids who made it hard for her.

Her mother recalls it being particularly bad this past year. Some of them would take her test papers so they could announce her grade and taunt her if it wasn’t a perfect score. Some others went the opposite direction.

“They would be like, ‘oh, you’re a nerd,’ ‘oh, you’re a geek,’” Julie said. “And like when I would do book reports about a science thing, people would start screaming at me in the middle of my report.”

While Julie said she’s found tremendous support and encouragement from online scientific communities of peers, she can’t say the say the same for the boys in her classes.

“No one would listen to me on projects, even in science, because they’re like, ‘oh, you’re a girl.’”

Maybe next year they can call NASA or MIT to get her bona fides and allay their concerns. In the meantime, she said she just does the work and tries, although it’s hard, to not let it bother her.

“I so strongly believe in it, that I want to do it,” she said, her voice full of enthusiasm. “I just have this thing where if there’s work that has to get done, it’s gotta get done and you have to do it. So even if people are telling you that you can’t, but you really want to and you believe you can, and you know you can do it, then do the work.”

Young astrophysicist at work This year has already been loaded with opportunities for Julie.

For starters, in January, she was awarded the Mars Generation’s 24 Under 24 Innovators in STEAM and Space Advocacy Award. Part of the reason she won this award can be attributed to her substantial internet advocacy of science. In addition to producing her own web news series (Supernova Style Science news, “where I share amazing science news

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Readers

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that will blow your mind supernova style.”), she also regularly posts science news on her social media accounts. Additionaly, with the help of three other young women scientists, Julie started STEAM Squad, an online community dedicated to encouraging young people to get involved in STEAM projects and education.

As if that wasn’t enough, in June, she attended her second NASA Wallops, which sponsors the Cubes in Space program. She won the spot this year for two of her experiment entries, one which tests structural foam to see which kind is stronger and another testing different pieces of glass to see if the amount of silica in the glass changes how much cosmic radiation it can bend.

“I have a bunch of friends who want to be astronauts, and just for astronauts in general, I just want to make sure they are super safe in space,” she said of the impetus for the glass experiment. “And if I can find a way to protect them better, I want to do that. For the structural foam, it’s being looked at for use in aerospace and other applications.

And if I can find the strongest kinds, then that will better help protect everyone.”

She was also chosen as the student lead and organizer for her group at Wallops that saw two of their experiments go up on the NASA sounding rocket and three in a NASA balloon.

Additionally, she was invited with only 20 other students across the country — the only one from New Hampshire and the only one from a public school, by the way — to the MIT Media Lab to build design and build a CubeSat, which uses infrared to study climate science. She said they are just getting underway now but the cube will probably launch next year.

She also recently learned that she is the 2018 state merit winner for the Discovery Education 3M Young Scientist Challenge for her Sage Survival System device.

“What my device is is a portable device that can use distillation or filtration to give developing countries and disaster areas like Puerto Rico improved access to clean and safe drinking water,” she said.

Laser focus on the future Julie is headed off to Nashua North High School this fall where she expects, or hopes anyway, that things will be different. Her mom hopes that the advanced math and science classes she will be in will separate her from the kids who tormented her in middle school. Julie said she’s looking forward to all that she’s going to learn.

“What I really want to do is study black holes because black holes are just so cool and super amazing, and there is just so much awesomeness. And also I want to know if there is a theory of everything. If there is an equation in the universe to explain it, and if there is, I want to find it,” she said. “[I’m not working on that just yet], because I am busy doing a lot of things, also I haven’t reached that point because I don’t know everything. There’s still a lot I need to learn. I try to learn as much as I can.”

There is one thing, however, of which she is certain: “I care so much about [science],” she said. “I just want to do it so bad that I just don’t care that other people think it is stupid. I still want to do it. It is my passion. And I don’t have to follow along with what they say, because it’s my life, not theirs.

“I find a lot of joy in it. I absolutely love it.”

Melanie Plenda is an award-winning freelance writer and longtime contributor to ParentingNH.

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www.parentingnh.com

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No butts about it, it’s

Teens are getting their nicotine fix on the s

By Mary Ellen Hettinger

E

ven if you don’t smell cigarette smoke on your teen, that doesn’t mean he or she isn’t addicted to nicotine – and isn’t using it in the dugout or in class.

New forms of vaporized nicotine dressed up in fruit and candy flavors and wrapped in fun decals or “skins” available at gas stations and convenience stores, are packing a wallop. So, while statistics show fewer teens are smoking cigarettes, recreational nicotine use is rising.

Does your son smell less like Axe and more like chocolate or cotton candy? Does your daughter leave a fruity fragrance in her wake? School administrators, resource officers and bus drivers are reporting that vaping and “juuling” flavored nicotine is leaving a telltale scent in school bathrooms, hallways and on buses.

Nicotine and the brain Why is youth nicotine use so dangerous? Susanne E. Tanski, MD, MPH, FAAP, a pediatrician at Children’s Hospital at Dartmouth-Hitchcock, has a special interest in tobacco control.

“Nicotine, found in tobacco products, is highly addictive. Nicotine is a potent psychoactive drug, that is, a chemical that affects the central nervous system. It is considered a gateway drug, because it affects the developing brain by changing the same dopamine and pleasure pathways that are activated with other addictive substances — including alcohol and opioids,” Dr. Tanski said.

A stimulant, nicotine increases heart rate and blood pressure by triggering a release of dopamine and epinephrine, making users feel alert and more relaxed, boosting mood, and suppressing appetite. With repeated use, users develop a tolerance, which leads to needing more nicotine. Addicted users need to have nicotine regularly or they suffer from withdrawal symptoms such as irritability, anxiety, anger, nausea, increased appetite, tremors, depression, insomnia, and difficulty concentrating.

The cycle of nicotine addiction is reinforcement of behavior that restores nicotine and makes the user feel good and avoids withdrawal. The cigarette, e-cig, vape pen, “mod” or JUUL is the delivery device; the nicotine provides the “buzz.”

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just as dangerous

e sly using portable electronic devices

Vaping devices are small and portable, and some are even designed to look like other personal items. photo courtesy of Breathe NH.

Youth are particularly vulnerable Now imagine a teen or tween whose brain is still developing.

“The adolescent brain appears uniquely susceptible to nicotine addiction, with symptoms of dependence appearing within days to weeks of intermittent tobacco use, and well before daily smoking,” Dr. Tanski said.

“This is biology and not a lack of self-control. If a teen makes it through the vulnerable period when their brain is changing so rapidly without being exposed to nicotine or other drugs, there is convincing evidence to suggest they will not become addicted.”

According to the National Youth Risk Behavior Survey, 44.9 percent of high school students nationwide have tried an e-cigarette, and 24.9 percent have used in the past 30 days.

Rates of using in the past 30 days were similar among Granite State high schools: 25 percent overall, ranging from 17.6 percent of freshmen to 32.4 percent of seniors. Multiple studies have found that youth who try vaping once have a markedly increased risk of smoking cigarettes.

Speedy delivery in higher concentrations One of the newest of the electronic devices is the JUUL. It resembles a thumb drive or memory stick with the battery chargeable in any computer USB port. According to commercial websites that sell the product, the sleek device produces “a thick, consistent vapor,” and “packs the same amount of nicotine as a pack of cigarettes into a tiny liquid-nicotine cartridge” for “better nicotine blood absorption, for a quicker fix.”

Teens inhale the battery-heated e-juice vapors to get the nicotine buzz. Teachers and school bus drivers report kids using JUULs behind their backs, hidden in the palm of their hands, with vapor — lesser amounts than vapor produced by vape pen or pipe — blown into long sleeves or backpacks.

A starter kit of a battery, charger and four pods of e-juice or

pod juice costs about $50. One JUUL pod contains the nicotine equivalent of 200 puffs on a cigarette, or an entire pack. The pod is the thumbnail-sized e-juice container that attaches to the JUUL. Although it’s illegal to sell any form of tobacco or electronic nicotine delivery system (ENDS) device to anyone under 18, any child with a gift card can purchase these items online, simply by claiming they are 18 or older. (JUUL Labs recently upped the age to buy online to 21.) Others get JUUL money by charging friends a few bucks for a hit off their device.

Ultra-portable and designed to be sneaky Another new and even smaller device is the Suorin Drop, a teardrop-shaped unit that is advertised as “ultra portable and discreet for stealth use,” and Suorin Air. Less expensive than JUUL, it’s refillable with “Blow Sauce,” another name for e-juice/ liquid nicotine or nicotine salts.

Vapes are also being designed to look like cosmetics, including lipsticks and mascara. The PUFFiT vaporizer looks exactly like a medical inhaler and uses “dried herbs.”

Many vaping products also allow do-it-yourselfers to refill them at home. However, liquid nicotine is highly toxic, absorbed through the skin, and causes burns in concentrated form. Less than a half- teaspoon of e-juice with nicotine can be fatal to a toddler or pet.

“There are videos on social media showing people how to take apart and fill various devices,” Allyssa Thompson, Director of Programs for Breathe New Hampshire (a nonprofit public health agency dedicated to lung health), said.

Thompson believes today’s viral climate is fueling the use of ENDS of all types. Kids are attracted by the flavors, like the techie look of the various gadgets, and connect with others by “sharing information — good and bad.” There is also aggressive online marketing.

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The facts about JUULing

NOw eNrOlliNg fOr fall 2018! en Op

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16 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

• In 2016, more than 2 million U.S. middle and high school students surveyed had used e-cigs in the past 30 days. (Centers for Disease Control & Prevention) • The evidence is insufficient to conclude that ENDS are effective for smoking cessation; many users vape and smoke. (CDC) • ENDS aerosol is not harmless “water vapor” and is not as safe as clean air. (CDC)

Many users believe that e-cigs and JUUL devices can be used where combustible cigarettes cannot, such as on smoke-free campuses and in dormitories. But, “all electronic nicotine delivery systems including JUUL and Suorin Drop fall under New Hampshire’s Youth Access to and Use of Tobacco Products, Section 126-K, which bans such products from public educational facilities,” said Kim Coronis, policy and program manager for Breathe NH. The law states that the purpose of the law is to protect children “from the possibility of addiction, disability, and death resulting from the use of tobacco products.”

To help combat youth nicotine addiction, and in response to requests for information about vaping, in March Breathe New Hampshire launched Vaping Unveiled, an informational program for adults and teens.

At the first Vaping Unveiled, guest panelist Devin Oot, executive director of Partnership for a Drug Free NH, said bus companies have reported that kids are vaping on buses, blowing vapor into empty water bottles, then releasing clouds of vapor at the driver — a dangerous activity teens call “vapor bombing.”

At a presentation at a high school with a zero-tolerance policy, administrators and school resource officers noted that some devices are so small, and are used so quickly, it’s hard to catch someone in the act. A resource officer said that because the policy for using drugs — including tobacco — mandates suspension, there were high school seniors who could not graduate with their class.

We don’t know the long-term effects of inhaling a mixture of heated chemicals (including a known poison), in unknown concentrations directly into the lungs.

Coronis notes that, according to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, 66 percent of teens surveyed believe that vape pens, e-cigs and other devices contain only “flavoring.” They don’t associate nicotine with ENDS. It’s up to parents and educators to warn young people about the known risks of nicotine addiction, and the potential danger of unknown effects on delicate lung tissue of sucking in unknown chemicals.

Go to www.breathenh.org for more information, or to host a Vaping Unveiled program in your community.

Mary Ellen Hettinger, APR, is the Director of Public Relations and Communications for Breathe New Hampshire.

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Your teen’s first job What you need to know before your child joins the workforce

By Crystal Ward Kent

“O

ne scoop or two? Is that in a sugar cone or waffle?” The questions fly fast and furious at the busy windows of Lago’s Ice Cream, a popular ice cream venue on Route 1 in Rye. On any given day, a dozen teens are on staff, taking orders, scooping out massive amounts of ice cream, making sundaes, frappes and floats and cleaning up.

For many, it is their first job, and many return year after year to a place that becomes like a second home.

Lago’s has been hiring teens since it opened in 1981.

“We love hiring teens,” said owner Steve Grenier.

“They have a good energy level and positive attitude and are eager to learn. Eventually many of our college students move on to a job closer to their career path, but for someone just entering the job market, this is a great place to start.”

Grenier said that even though making the perfect ice cream cone may not sound like an experience that could influence your career, the work has an impact.

“We teach kids to leave mediocrity at the door,” he said. “Those are the words we live by. If you do your job, be consistent about details, and are on time, these skills will serve you well in the long run. Learning to do small things well helps you manage big projects. Some tasks are mundane but you will always have such work to do, no matter what your career is.

If you handle these with skill and efficiency, you will be organized and prepared to tackle things that are more challenging.”

Jobs that rely heavily on customer interaction also teach kids critical interpersonal skills.

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| august 2018 19

KNOW THE LAW The NH Department of Labor has rules and regulations regarding teen employment.

Here are answers to some of the most popular questions.

This information was provided by the State of New Hampshire.

For more, including how many hours a teen can work, go to www.nh.gov.

Q: Do youths under the age of 18 need a NH Youth Employment Certificate?

A: Under the age of 16 they would have to have a New Hampshire Youth Employment Certificate.

A 16- or 17-year old would have to have written permissions from a parent or legal guardian giving them permission to work.

Q: How do youths get a NH Youth Employment Certificate?

A: First they find a job. Then the employer completes a form called an Employer’s Request for Child Labor and gives it to them. The youth takes that form to their local school or school superintendent’s office and the school will issue the certificate that the youth takes back to the employer. However, parents may also obtain a youth certificate for their child by calling the Department of Labor at (603) 271-3176.

Q: If a person is 18 and still in high school, are they a youth?

A: No, the term youth means any person under 18.

20 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

“The job is very fast-paced, so teens need to learn good interpersonal skills and teamwork so the crew works together and helps each other out as needed,” said Grenier.

“The kids also learn how to interact with customers, how to be friendly, answer questions, and help solve any problems that might arise, whether it’s a dropped cone or someone wanting a special item. I see kids come in here summer after summer who are really shy and after a few weeks they have really blossomed and come out of their shell.

It’s pretty amazing.”

Grenier encourages that growth by inviting his ice cream crews to come up with ideas for new products or flavors, or any other suggestions that can help the business and the customer experience.

“We’ve gotten some great feedback,” he said.

“It’s always fun to hear what the kids come up with and to see them care about the business.”

look for and having them will stand teens in good stead on that first job.”

Schopick said teens who have trouble with authority, get bored easily, have low self-esteem or are overly sensitive to criticism may have difficulty with that first job.

“No one likes to be criticized, but if your teen falls apart over being corrected, then it is important for parents to find a way to build up their self-esteem and teach them how to handle criticism before they enter the job market. They need to understand that it’s not personal, but meant to help them do the job better.

“Likewise, if your child gets bored easily, working with them to find a job that really interests them can help them adapt. For example, if they

Are they ready?

Every teen is different in how quickly they mature, so while some teens are ready to tackle a job at age 14 or 15, others may not be comfortable in the workplace until later.

Dr. David Schopick, a psychiatrist in private practice in Portsmouth who is board certified in child and adolescent psychiatry, offers some tips.

“If your teen already has a good work ethic, like perhaps wanting to have a lemonade stand when they were a child and now they are talking about ways to earn money, then this is a good indicator that they are probably ready for a ‘real’ job,” he said.

“Another thing to watch for is a certain level of maturity. Some questions to consider are: Are they good at following directions? Are they reliable?

Do they have some initiative? And, do they want to be busy? If the answers to these questions are ‘yes,’ then most likely they are ready to go to work.

These traits are characteristics that employers

are passionate about animals, perhaps working in a pet store is a good fit. If they love technology, then Best Buy might be an option. If some of these issues are ongoing problems, such as having trouble with authority, then talking with a counselor might be wise so that this problem doesn’t become worse and interfere with a successful career down the road.”

Parents can also help teens prepare for “realworld jobs” by giving them chores at home, and gradually increasing those responsibilities as children enter their tween and teen years.

“Parents might even offer payment for certain jobs if they require a bigger level of responsibility and are consistently done well and when expected,” said Schopick.

Not all teens have a smooth entry into the job market, and when that happens, parents need to know when to intervene. “If your child has applied

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for job after job and is getting turned down, it can be a blow to their self-esteem and start to create anxiety about the whole job interview process,” said Schopick.

“A parent might ask some of these potential employers for some insights into why their child wasn’t hired so they can be better prepared next time around.”

For Tanya Regna of Dover, this summer is the first summer her son, CJ, 16, has had a job, and so far, the experience is going well.

“We encouraged him to get a job at 15, but even though he applied at companies that said they hired kids under 16, when he went for the interviews, he was told he was too young. After a few experiences like that, he gave up. We didn’t push it because he still could not drive, so his having a job would have made it really challenging for us to get him to work, given our already hectic schedules. Now, he will soon have his license, so we gave him a nudge that a job would be really good, and he found one.”

With many jobs out there for teens, parents can be at sea when it comes to what job might be the best fit for their child.

There are laws designed to protect the safety and welfare of teens and tweens (see info box), but beyond that, job choice is a personal choice made by parent and child.

Regna decided to set some boundaries, but for the most part, she let CJ pick his own first job.

“As a new driver, I did not want him doing food delivery or being on the road for an extended time. Also, since he started work prior to school getting out, we told him that work could not interfere with his schoolwork or grades. He’s worked hard to be an honor student, and we want him to maintain that – as does he.”

Like the teens at the Lago’s, CJ is involved in customer service, working as a busboy/server at a busy golf club. He interacts with cadres of coworkers and club members while dealing with the club’s hectic event schedule.

Regna said she is pleased her son likes the work and that she is getting good reports.

“Club members have told me that he’s a hard worker, that he takes the initiative and helps out whenever asked, which makes me proud. I can also say that I’ve already seen great changes at home.

He has to be responsible for his schedule and avoid conflicts, make sure his uniform is ready for his shifts, and that he has transportation, and he’s doing all of that. He’s also been better about doing his chores at home. I’ve seen tremendous growth in his taking responsibility overall.”

For CJ himself, the experience has proven equally positive. “I enjoy having a job,” he said. “It gives me something to do and the environment at the country club is friendly and open. To be honest, having a job is not as difficult and scary as everyone says it is. I do feel like more of an adult now that I’m working. There’s something about making and spending your own money that makes you feel more mature.”

Regna said the only negative regarding CJ’s first job is that her son’s influx of ready cash combined with the ease of online ordering has resulted in an uptick of boxes arriving from Amazon. “We did tell him that half of every paycheck has to go into his savings, but I think we may need to talk a bit more about the budgeting process,” she said, laughing.

Crystal Ward Kent is a freelance writer who has written for numerous local and regional magazines. She owns Kent Creative in Dover.

22 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

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Get ready for the first d Tips to help parents make the first day of school and the days that follow less stressful for For younger kids:

Some

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system orhood Buddy child in the neighlkb to school wa other ild can h c Find an r u hom yo s. with w bu on the e d i r r o

For kids of any age:

before t h g i n ing e the organiz y b Prepar h s ay out ing ru

n fore. L he mor ight be le any n Avoid t e h t assemb can d u n o a y t h wha a lunc need. , make s e h t o d may l l i c h c r s you supplie

24 www.parentingnh.com | august AUGUST 2018

e

day of school everyone

compiled By Melanie hitchcock

For older kids:

y are ules r ime the t do d t n a h u w need to ey ws o y n e k h t d Set gro t l i p, wha time th our ch

y et u hat ertain ir d and g orning and w e b ow the Make c o t n k o g m y e o h t h c ed ol ea that t expect or scho chool. Check f y d a e end. rs to get r e week ouse fo h h t e n h o t e s and to leav eekday w n o curfew d rganize e if they have too s o t e g r child ule together to se t setting prioritie e u o y p l th d ou He ’s sche anging hem ab r d t r il a h h e c it r r w r r you ary o . Talk Go ove necess at once if n s o ie g it in o in activ much g g certa in p p o and dr f them. some o f o e tim

rk. tudy s omewo o h t o d p o t Set u r them ar to time fo lend gular ve a ca a Set a re h y e h ll as a ure t , as we s t n Make s e m ders in assign ork fol w e m record o h r ck and ents fo backpa tuck assignm to which ping. safekee

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ang y t bout ch ere are a e i s u x o n v th ner ea Manag n and teens can baecher. Remind thehm ms d il see or te your c hildre elp Many c ool, classroom lso uneasy. If t and h u o b a a h c orried ho are a new s n. ents w y are w d e u h t t situatio s t f e a o h h t t w o r l e t a hem to mas s, ask t e ways v l ner vou o s roblem them p

Sources: Scholastic Parents (www.

scholastic.com), PBS (www.pbs.org), www. healthychildren.org, www.greatschools.org, U.S. Dept. of Education (www.ed.gov)

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Back-to-school: PhysicalExaminations

For many families, it’s physical examina-

tion time — as the start of school is almost here. ParentingNH reached out to several health care professionals to ask about the whens and whys of annual physical exams and about some best practices regarding sending our kids back to school healthy and ready to learn.

Our experts: Loretta Chou, MD, of St. Joseph Hospital Pediatrics–Sky Meadow, in Nashua, Dr. Laura Miller and Jennifer Lavallee, PNP, of Merrimack Pediatrics, Dr. Andy Westinghouse of Core Pediatrics in Plaistow and Lydia Bennett, MD, of Derry Medical Center in Bedford.

How often does my child need a physical?

Chou: “Pediatricians routinely recommend an annual physical for children. An annual physical is very important because it focuses on preventative care; a provider may determine, by either history or the exam, an issue that may be addressed before a true problem arises. Some of these issues may be health related such as nutrition or a sleep disorder. Other preventative issues include learning disabilities or behavioral problems. Depression and anxiety are also a frequent problem among preteens and teenagers. Many of these issues not identified by family members and can be explored during a routine annual physical.”

Westinghouse: “As pediatricians, we’re here to help guide you on your child’s growth, development and health. We address diet, exer-

cise, mental health as well as physical issues. We are very much into prevention as much as possible, and are advocates of children and families having a medical home that they are familiar and comfortable with.”

Bennett: “Ideally, your school age child should have a Well Child Check, also referred to as a Health Maintenance Visit, once a year.

Many children will require this annual visit not just for general health evaluation, but also for school, sports, and camp/activity clearances. We recommend scheduling the annual visit at a time of year that meets your scheduling needs or is easy to remember, with many parents choosing birthdays as a milestone, and scheduling in advance to minimize possible delays in activities or education.”

How do an annual physical and a sports physical differ?

Miller/Lavallee: “If you are seeing your primary care provider for the visit, there likely is no difference. If you choose, however, to go to immediate care for a sports physical, this is a basic check to make sure your child has nothing that would exclude them from participating in sports. The ‘sports physical’ is not quite as thorough as the annual physical and would not count as their annual physical for insurance purposes, it is recommended that the annual physical still be scheduled.”

Chou: “Both address various areas of your child’s health, development, behavior and learning. Sports physicals additionally focus on prevention of sports-related injuries and health problems. Issues such as concussions and cardiac causes of sudden death are evaluated, and a more detailed neurological and muscular skeletal exam may be performed.”

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| august 2018 27

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Westinghouse: “If your child gets a brief sports physical outside of your usual office, we do recommend getting a well check with your pediatrician or health care provider as well. Some people are unaware that pediatricians take care of children from birth to age 22 — right through college.”

Bennett: “As primary care providers, and parents, we know how difficult it can be to arrange for each child to be seen yearly, so your child’s annual visit covers a multitude of topics and evaluations. In addition to sports/activity participation, it’s important to go over key factors in keeping healthy, including evaluation of musculature, pulmonary and cardiovascular health, nutrition, fitness, sleep, relationships and emotional health.”

Why are physicals important to my child’s school?

Miller/Lavallee: “Physicals are important to the school because they want to make sure every child is being cared for and is up to date on their immunizations. If a child is not up to date on immunizations, they are at a higher risk for certain illness and may place other children at risk. This also lets the school know what extra precautions they should have for certain kids with conditions such as asthma, allergies, anxiety, etc. If a child visits the school nurse, the nurse can be much better prepared knowing the student’s health history.”

Chou: “Physicals are important to your child’s school because they inform the school about your child’s vaccinations, health issues (which may re-

quire daily medication to be administered at school) and other diagnoses, which may impact a child’s learning. For example, asthma and food allergies are common health problems in schoolaged children and require a school nurse to have the appropriate medication in an emergency. Attention deficit disorder with or without hyperactivity and autistic spectrum disorder are also diagnoses which significantly impact a child’s ability to learn.

Schools need to know of these issues to fully support a child’s academic progress.”

Westinghouse: “Schools do encourage all children to get physicals yearly, and to be up-to-date on all of their vaccines. New Hampshire is one of the best states in the country for encouraging universal vaccines to protect children and their entire community. School nurses also want to be aware of any child that might need extra attention, such as a child with asthma, diabetes or mental health issues. Pediatricians work closely with schools and community resources to keep their children safe and healthy. Children spend a great deal of time in school and sometimes need extra supports. It is very common for pediatricians to discuss getting those extra supports through special education services.”

Bennett: “Wellness checks are important to schools for several reasons. School is an environment with many children and adults in close quarters, so ensuring that vaccinations are up to date helps to keep the school community healthier as a whole.”

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How can I prepare my child for the exam?

Miller/Lavallee: “Encourage your child to be honest and open with their provider and ask questions. Let your child know that their provider is there to help them. You may also want to prepare them that the provider will need to do a full physical exam and it is only OK as long as the parents are in the room to give consent. For younger children, watching an episode of Doc McStuffins or Daniel Tiger’s ‘A Check-up at the Doctor’ prior to their visit can be a huge help and comfort.”

Chou: “You can help your child prepare for their physical exam by discussing what to expect beforehand. Explain to your child a full physical exam includes an examination of their body from head to toe, including a genitalia exam. Your child may need vaccinations and allowing your child to be prepared helps them proactively manage expectations.”

Westinghouse: “Preparing especially younger children for the doctor’s visit is always helpful. Coming in with a positive attitude and explaining necessity of procedures such as vaccines and testing for anemia and lead exposure are all very important.

Having a positive spin on this is helpful, to help your child be more resilient. Doc McStuffins has been a big help to us!”

Bennett: “We have seen beneficial outcomes when parents discuss any possible vaccine needs with their child prior to the visit, so they know what to expect. A few reassuring words like ‘it’s okay to

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be nervous about getting a vaccine, but it’s an important part of staying healthy for all of us,’ can go a long way in reassuring your child. Teenagers should have an opportunity to talk with their primary healthcare provider privately, in case they have any particular concerns that they may be uncomfortable bringing up with more people in the room.”

Why is our family history important?

Chou: “Being aware of a child’s family history can help a provider determine what type of tests or exams to focus on during an annual physical. Hypertension, elevated cholesterol, thyroid problems and asthma are just some of the illnesses that could be detected prior to causing complications in a child.”

Is it important to ensure vaccinations are up to date?

Miller/Lavallee: “Vaccinations are extremely important to be done on schedule or very close to it. The CDC has done extensive research to determine the recommended schedule for children to maximize their immune response and cover the most critical periods of increased risk.”

Chou: “Up-to-date vaccines are extremely important for your child as well as for all children and adults they encounter. Vaccinations have been proven to prevent infections. Vaccines are effective for preventing infection in your child, but also prevent the spread of infections to others through a process called ‘herd immunity.’ Herd immunity occurs when the vast majority of children are im-

munized against an infection, thereby giving protection for those children who cannot receive vaccines due to certain diseases. By vaccinating your children, you are also protecting other children and adults within your community.”

Westinghouse: “One of the very most essential and important services that we provide in our office is vaccinating all children and adolescents. Immunizations have helped children stay healthy for more than 50 years. They are very safe and they work. We have reduced pediatric infectious disease by over 90 percent over the years and we are seeing far fewer admissions to the hospital and emergency room. While the Internet has been helpful in some ways, there is also quite a bit of misinformation and misleading websites that can frighten a parent unnecessarily. It is important to stay in touch with your pediatrician, someone you can trust, who knows the science and research behind vaccines and has the child’s best interest at heart.”

Bennett: “Keeping up to date with vaccines is of vital importance to your child’s health, and the health of our homes, schools, work, camp, and after school activity communities. At every annual visit, your child’s immunization record should be reviewed, and updated as needed.”

When should I schedule the annual physical?

Miller/Lavallee: “You may schedule it a year in advance at some offices, however the most important thing to remember is to schedule as far in advance as possible in order to ensure availabili-

ty of an office visit, especially during busy months.

Some choose to keep their annual visit soon after the birth date for ease of remembering.”

Chou: “We recommend that annual physicals be scheduled at least a month or two prior to when your child’s physical exam is due. Due to insurance criteria, physicals are usually performed a year from the last physical, not necessarily around your child’s birthday.”

My child is 15 and hasn’t had an HPV vaccination — is it too late?

Bennett: “The HPV, or Human Papilloma Virus, vaccination is scheduled to be given to girls and boys at their annual visit of 11 or 12 years of age.

However, teens and young adults can and should get this vaccine series, if not done previously. This is one of the reasons that yearly checkups remain important for high school students.”

Miller/Lavallee: “It is definitely not too late and is highly recommended. Based on studies, the best immune response is built when the series is started prior to 15 years old, therefore only two immunizations are needed in the HPV series. If done after 15 years, the body still builds the immune response, however three immunizations are required rather than two. There is so much social media controversy over the vaccine, much of which has all been debunked. Please, when looking into the vaccine, check your sources to make sure they are legitimate. You may also ask your provider for more information. No question is too silly.”

www.parentingnh.com

| august 2018 29

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30 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

Dinosaurs Marching ( Whaddaya to Derry think of that?)

Laurie Berkner on kids, music and parenting

By Bill Burke

N

eil Diamond has “Sweet Caroline,” Aerosmith has “Dream On,” and Laurie Berkner has “We Are the Dinosaurs.”

Every genre-leading artist has recorded a song that becomes so popular that it evolves into a must-play on their set list. And for children’s musician/author/TV personality Laurie Berkner, that song is “We Are the Dinosaurs” – one of the first songs she ever wrote.

“There are some songs, that if I don’t do them, people get very upset,” said Berkner, who will be performing a solo show at the Tupelo Music Hall in Derry on Sept. 15. “There was a long period, maybe six or seven years, where I wasn’t sure which one everybody was waiting for. But now with the book, (“We Are the Dinosaurs”), it’s become the most iconic song of mine. And I do it toward the end of the show so it feels like it’s a song a lot of kids are waiting for. It gives them something fun to do at the end.”

ParentingNH had an opportunity to talk one-on-one with this rock star/mom, who first burst onto the children’s music scene in 1997, when the Laurie Berkner Band’s first album, “Whaddaya Think of That” was released.

Her audience grew after a 2001 appearance on “The Today Show” and her videos began showing on the Noggin network. She’s played celebrity family birthday parties, the White House Easter Egg Roll, Central Park and Carnegie Hall. And soon, the Tupelo Music Hall.

So rest easy, Laurie Berkner fans — of which there are legion — the dinos are coming to Derry.

Question:

What is a Laurie Berkner solo show like?

Answer: “At all of my shows I try to hit songs that are the favorites – the greatest hits. Sometimes I’ll do a cappella songs when I’m playing by myself. Generally it’s not that different. It feels more intimate because it’s just me. Certainly the space at Derry, I haven’t seen the space but from the size and the description of the room, it’s going to be an intimate show. There will be lots of movement, activity, it will be interactive, fun and there will be songs everybody can sing along to.”

Musician Laurie Berkner courtesy Photo

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| august 2018 31

Q: When did you discover that you had a

talent for writing music that children loved?

A: “I had been teaching preschool music for a few years in the late 90s and I realized it was much harder to find music that I felt worked in the classroom. I found I could still manage the class and write songs the kids loved — to just make up what they enjoyed. ‘We Are the Dinosaurs’ was maybe the first song I wrote like that. The kids responded so positively.

I made it up one day with the kids while we were all marching around the room. I didn’t know what they wanted to sing about and one kid yelled out ‘dinosaurs!,’ So I said, ‘great, everybody get up.’ It was in a minor key, we stomped around, roared, we would eat food, it was on the ground — and then they left. I said, ‘OK, that was fun, I’ll try it with another class.’ When that first class came back — I would see them twice a week, so they came back on a Friday — they said they wanted to sing the dinosaur song. I couldn’t remember it. I remembered it was in a minor key and we stomped around. It developed over few weeks and then I started trying to write other songs.

It was at that point I remember thinking, ‘this is a direction.’”

Q: What keeps it compelling for you?

A: “There are so many aspects to being a musician these days. It’s tough to be a songwriter and a performer and a business owner and a personality on television or in videos or on YouTube or Facebook Live, and to take time to put lots of pictures up on Instagram.

There are so many ways and it’s so important to try to connect with people. The part that keeps it exciting or fresh is every time I get another video of a family and a parent is saying ‘this is my kid completely absorbed in your music.’ Or ‘my child is getting through another hospital visit by listening to your music,’ or ‘my child is on the autism spectrum and is trying to communicate with me through your music.’ Every time I see that or hear that, I remember that I’m doing something that’s not only fun for me, but has a positive effect on other people. It feels like a good thing and I want to keep doing it.”

Q: What music did you listen to when you were young?

A: “When I was the same age as the kids I

32 www.parentingnh.com | august 2018

Laurie Berkner has a knack for engaging young audiences. courtesy Photo

write for, I listened to Hap Palmer and some Burl Ives and Pete Seeger — folky music. I listened to Peter, Paul and Mary. They had an album called ‘Peter, Paul and Mommy,’ it had ‘Puff the Magic Dragon’ on it and ‘500 miles.’”

Q: And now?

A: “I have less of a choice these days because I have a 13-year-old, so I listen to whatever she puts on, which I love. She’s really interested in musicals. When I was younger, I loved ‘The Sound of Music,’ ‘Mary Poppins,’ classic musicals of that time — ‘Peter Pan,’ ‘My Fair Lady.’ I knew all the words to every song. My daughter is fully immersed in musicals and loves listening to soundtracks. ‘Falsettos,’ we had an intense ‘Hamilton’ phase, ‘Something Rotten.’ She loves every show we’ve seen and now I know every song. If I’m by myself, I’ll listen to Hawaiian slack key guitar or west African music. There are no lyrics.

It’s just repetitive, intense music.”

Q: Tell us about your writing process.

Where does a song like ‘Cookie Bakers of the Night’ come from?

A: “From the recesses of my weird brain.

(Laughs.) That is part of it, but I also think I have really strong memories that I really treasure from when I was a kid about things I thought were funny or interesting or scary. I really enjoy visiting those memories. I wrote ‘Cookie Bakers of the Night’ when I was think-

ing about (the Maurice Sendak book) ‘In the Night Kitchen.’ It was weird and it scared me, and I remember thinking of how would it be if I were writing that. A lot of my songs start from memories like that and things that excite me even as adult. Or I may listen to a kid say something and it reminds me of something when I was a child. I remember thinking ‘that’s a totally weird song, does it make sense?’”

Q: Was guitar your primary instrument growing up?

A: “It was my last instrument. I started on piano when I was seven, I tried clarinet and added violin and I always sang. And then around the time I dropped the clarinet and violin during high school, I kept playing piano. I picked up a guitar while babysitting for a girl who was taking lessons. It had strings, I knew the notes and I thought, ‘this is fun.’ I could walk around with it and sing while I played it – it seemed like I had found the instrument that made sense for me.”

Q: What’s the most challenging part of balancing the roles of rock star and a mom?

A: “It’s kind that you call me a rock star.

Probably traveling. And I would say that it depended on the different times of (daughter) Lucy’s life. When she was four, it was a perfect time to bring her to shows, and she understood enough that she wanted to be in the audience and experience the show. But she would get so angry and frustrated when she would walk up to the stage and I couldn’t stop and talk to her. And then after the show she would have to wait an hour and a half as I spent time with other kids. She’d have to share me after the show. She told me, ‘Mom, I love your job and I hate your job.’ It was hard to figure out how to be there for her and give her what I was giving all these other kids. She should be able to come to a Laurie Berkner concert, but she couldn’t. It was a whole other experience. The person I cared most about giving a fantastic, positive music experience was the one person I couldn’t. We did at home, of course, but it was different.”

Laurie Berkner will be performing a solo show at the Tupelo Music Hall in Derry on Saturday, Sept. 15.

For tickets and info, visit tupelomusichall.com.

Bill Burke had been ParentingNH’s Dad on Board for 10 years.

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We did it again!

Recently, ParentingNH was honored with 7 gold awards and a bronze award by the Parenting Media Association at its annual Design and Editorial Awards Competition.

ParentingNH brought home gold awards for Best Website, Humor Column, Special Series, Editor’s Note/Publisher’s Note, Travel Feature, Ancillary Publication Overall Design and Ancillary Publication General Excellence (Family Summer Fun Guide); and a bronze award for Profile Story.

This marks the 11th year in a row that ParentingNH has been honored by PMA, and we are pumped!

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Fairs, festivals, food and fun

Spend the day at one of these annual late-summer events By Jacqueline Tourville

I

n August and September, it’s a Granite State tradition to celebrate the end of summer at an agricultural fair, festival or special food event.

Some of the season’s most festive — and kid-friendly — events take place over the next few weeks, so be sure to leave room in your family’s calendar for more summer fun.

It’s not over yet!

Fairs Get a jump on agricultural fair season in New Hampshire at the Cheshire Fair in Swanzey.

This time-honored fair, which is celebrating 80 years this year, features 4-H animal and livestock shows, agricultural displays, a carnival midway, and plenty of entertainment, including a Battle of the Bands, truck pull, fireworks and comedy show.

Aug. 2-5; www.cheshirefair.org

At the annual Belknap Country 4-H Fair in Belmont, admission for children under 10 is free.

The fair features animal exhibits, live music and plenty of midway games and rides. On Friday, Aug.10, stop by Hoot Night, the fair’s open showcase for local musicians. Aug. 10-12; www.bc4hfair.org The laid-back Cornish Fair has a packed schedule of family-friendly events, including animal exhibits and midway fun, the Cornish Fair prince and princess pageants, and live music. Want to show your kids a rocking good time? Don’t miss this year’s headliner, Bon Jersey, a Bon Jovi tribute band. Aug. 17-19; www.cornishfair.org On Labor Day weekend, the bustling midway and sprawling agricultural exhibits of the Hopkinton State Fair is a farewell-to-summer tradition. The fair is home to one of the largest livestock displays in New England, with barn after barn of cattle, goats, pigs,

sheep, horses, oxen, llamas and other four-footed favorites. Elsewhere on the fairgrounds, don’t miss the demolition derby and roller coaster.

Aug. 31-Sept. 3; www.hsfair.org

At the Hillsborough County Fair in New Boston you will find 4-H kids competing with their pigs, rabbits and goats for that elusive blue ribbon, plus oxen and horse pulling competitions, giant pumpkin weigh off, an apple pie contest, live music, entertainment, and exciting midway rides and games.

Sept. 7-9; www.hcafair.com

Now in its 142nd year, the Deerfield Fair lays claims to the title of New England’s oldest agricultural fair. Highlights of this year’s fair include agility dog demonstrations, horse shows, and a WW II re-enactment, plus livestock exhibits and all the usual midway excitement. Sept. 27-30; www.deerfieldfair.com

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| august 2018 35

Festivals Give summer a festive farewell, starting with taking a step back in time at the Hay Day Family Festival, an annual celebration of good old summertime fun held at The Fells estate in Newbury each August. Planned events include old-fashioned games, music, children’s art projects, scavenger hunt, petting zoo, face painting, and plenty of delicious food.

You can also explore the estate’s nature trails and Fairy Village, and take guided tours of the Main House and gardens.

Sunday, Aug. 12; www.thefells.org

Each August, kids take over Hampton Beach for the annual free Children’s Festival, five days of non-stop activity and entertainment, including sand castle building competitions, talent show, dancing, games and face painting. The annual festival kicks off with a magic show and builds up to a Giant Costume Parade that marches along Hampton Beach on the last day of the festival.

Aug. 13-17; www.hamptonbeach.org

Celebrate the gentle giants of the north at Colebrook’s annual North Country Moose Festival. The festival features a moose-calling contest, live music, horse-drawn wagon rides, a dog show, maple syrup tasting contest, and other moose-centric activities for all ages. Aug. 24-25; www.chamberofthenorthcountry.com

Best of the rest…

A few more fairs, festivals and food events to check out in August and September:

Ready for some outof-this-world fun?

Head to Exeter’s annual UFO Festival.

Held throughout Exeter’s downtown, the festival draws both UFO enthusiasts and skeptics for two educational and exciting days devoted to aliens, unidentified flying objects, and the possibility of life on other planets. Just for kids are outer space-themed games and crafts and music. Sept. 1-2; www.exeterufofestival.org

Food If August isn’t hot enough for you, head to the Fire on the Mountain Chili Fest at Pat’s Peak. The annual fundraiser for the Henniker Rotary Club has two chili tasting competitions – one for amateurs and one for professionals.

Entertainment, activities for the kids, more food including a beer wagon and ice cream, and car cruise-in makes this a fun day for everyone. Sunday, Aug. 19; www.chilinewhampshire.org

Got a budding inventor, scientist, or baker in the family? Head to the Children’s Museum of New Hampshire in Dover for the NH Maker & Food Fest (Formerly the Dover Mini Maker Faire) and learn from local “makers” as they demonstrate their hobbies, experiments, projects — from building robots to baking fantastic foods. Hands on demonstrations are a win for kids.

Saturday, Aug. 25; www.childrens-museum.org

36 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST august 2018

• Lancaster Fair in Lancaster Aug. 30- Sept. 2 www.lancasterfair.com • League of New Hampshire Craftsmen’s Fair in Newbury Aug. 4-12 www.nhcrafts.org • Rochester Fair in Rochester Sept. 6-16 www.rochesterfair.com • Southern NH Food Truck Festival in Nashua Saturday, Sept. 22 www.iugonashua.com • Food Truck Festival at the Fisher Cats in Manchester Aug. 17-18 www.nhfishercats.com

To end summer on a tasty note, head to the Hampton Beach Seafood Festival for an amazing spread of foods from local restaurants, plus live music, a lobster-eating contest, chef demonstrations, high flying performances by Skydive New England, crafts vendors, and fireworks on the beach. Sept. 7-9; www. hamptonbeachseafoodfestival.com

Consider it a chance to squeeze in one last day at the beach — and one last lobster roll — before summer is over for another year.

Jacqueline Tourville is an award-winning children’s author who lives in southern Maine.

Jacqueline frequently writes about events and activities for families. She is celebrating her 10th anniversary as a contributor to ParentingNH in 2018.

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dad on board Bringing up Baby Driver Driving instruction is best left to the professionals – I’m out

BY BILL BURKE If the jockey is nervous, the horse is nervous.

This is what I learned during a recent driving excursion that featured my teen daughter at the wheel, and me, shouting and grasping the driver’s headrest in a white knuckle deathgrip from the back seat.

She’s 15 now, almost 16, and it’s time for her to learn to drive. What she doesn’t need to learn is how to communicate with her dad, because two minutes into our trip, she offered up that rather appropriate analogy. Evidently, I was the jockey, and screaming “turn!” and “slow down!” and “this song is horrible change the station!” at every opportunity helps no one – especially the horse.

My personal journey into the heart of darkness started on a recent warm night, when I got it into my head that we would visit a barbecue joint near our house. It’s essentially a tin shack without air conditioning, featuring blues music and amazing food. Total authenticity from the moment you step through the door. After about five minutes, however, two-thirds of our party of three seemed less interested in authenticity and more in keeping perspiration out of their brisket. They pleaded with me to abandon what my wife had renamed “the sweat lodge of food.” I agreed, we boxed up our order and took it on the road.

A few miles into our ride home, I thought it would be good for our teen to get some driving time. I pulled over and we switched places – she got behind the wheel, my wife remained in the passenger seat and I got into the back. I entered the vehicle that night a young-atheart father and husband with a sunny disposition. The next time my feet touched the welcoming predictability of solid earth, I had transformed into a brittle, shattered husk of a man, incapable of rational discourse and more than a little shaky.

She’s not a bad driver at all; she’s just inexperienced at this point – just as I am an inexperienced driving instructor. And by “inexperienced,” I mean “horrible.” There’s a reason I’m not a driving instructor, and apparently that reason is my paralyzing fear of being a driving instructor.

Luckily, she only absorbed a small amount of my back seat belligerence. My wife offered encouragement in soothing tones, which was a far cry from my jittery jockey technique. With each passing mile, she became more confident.

“I might be the best driver ever.”

“I’m Baby Driver.”

“I think I’m going to be a getaway driver.”

Carting her around for the rest of my life isn’t a reasonable option and shouting at her from the back seat isn’t going to get us anywhere.

She starts driving school this month, so I know that one day soon we’ll look back on this and laugh. In the meantime, we’ll just leave it to the professionals.

Bill Burke is a writer who lives in southern New Hampshire with his wife and daughter, aka Girl Speed Racer. He is also the managing editor of custom publications for McLean Communications.

38 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

raising teens & tweens The push and pull of letting go Managing the many emotions you will have when your child leaves home

BY Tracey Tucker May and June are chaotic months for most parents. This is especially true for parents of graduating seniors, whose entire year has revolved around helping their soon-to-be graduate decide what they will do after high school, whether that’s a gap year, military, work, travel or college.

By the time graduation rolls around, parents are exhausted and emotionally drained. Witnessing their senior go through all of the lasts in high school — last prom, last game or last performance — can be difficult for parents. Being excited and sad at the same time is an experience most parents of high school graduates can relate to.

And for many, the experience is not over as the next several months are consumed with making plans for their graduate to go off to their new life.

Preparing them to leave and letting go is a push and pull for parents.

Losing the child they once held in their arms and snuggled with can be painful. This may be offset by excitement for the experiences they are about to have and increased anxiety about how they will do when they are on their own.

And all the while parents are pinging back and forth between sadness, anxiety and excitement, the new adult is experiencing a sense of freedom, excitement for what is to come and the fear of being alone.

How do parents and their new adults get through the months between graduation and their new life? It is important for parents to recognize their own emotions.

It is normal and healthy to be sad one moment, then excited, then fearful. Talking about your feelings and helping your child identify what they are feeling is helpful. When parents can recognize and understand their emotions and coping skills, they are more likely to see them in their children. Identifying these with your children is a great way to help them understand how they are behaving. They might not immediately agree with you but they will inevitably think about how they are acting and what you said.

Lean into your children as much as you can. Even if they are rejecting you or acting disrespectful or agitated, try to be as calm and positive as possible. Many parents and kids unintentionally pull away as a form of coping and protection. Not knowing this is happening can lead to increased conflict and tension.

Try as hard as you can to show your excitement for their new life journey and let them know how much confidence you have in them. If they know you are there to help them, they will come to you for advice and support.

Finally, take care of yourself. The loss around what your life has been as a full-time parent night is huge. Lean on your partner or friends for support. Do things that make you happy and fill your time with activities that include self-care.

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Tracey Tucker is Executive Director of New Heights: Adventures for Teens and a licensed mental health counselor at Tradeport Counseling Associates in Portsmouth.

www.parentingnh.com

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Look before you lock Heatstroke is a real danger for children left in hot cars

BY Julie Dietrich Heatstroke is the number one killer of children aside from car crashes. That’s why Safe Kids New Hampshire, a program of the Children’s Hospital at Dartmouth-Hitchcock (CHaD), has joined with the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration to attempt to reduce these deaths by reminding parents and caregivers about the dangers of heatstroke and leaving children in hot cars.

“As outside temperatures rise, the risk of children dying from being left alone inside a hot vehicle also rises,” said Julie Dietrich, CHaD’s Child Passenger Safety Program Coordinator.

According to Dietrich, once a vehicle is turned off, it takes less than 10 minutes for the temperature to rise 35 degrees. “One child dies from heatstroke nearly every 10 days from being left in a hot vehicle, but what is most tragic is that the majority of these deaths could have been prevented,” she said.

Safe Kids New Hampshire urges all parents and caregivers to do these four things: 1. Never leave a child in a vehicle unattended.

2. Make it a habit to look in the back seat every time you exit the car.

3. Always lock the car and put the keys out of reach. And, if you ever see a child left alone in a hot vehicle, call 911 right away.

4. Always keep personal items such as purses on the rear floor so checking the rear seat area becomes a habit.

If you are a bystander: 1. Always make sure the child is OK and responsive. If not, call 911 right away.

2. If the child appears OK, attempt to locate the parents; or have the facility’s security or management page the car owner over the PA system.

3. If there is someone with you, one person should search for the parent while someone waits at the car.

4. If the child is not responsive and appears in great distress, try to get into the car to assist the child, even if that means breaking a window.

Know the warning signs of heatstroke, which include: • Red, hot, and moist or dry skin • No sweating • A strong rapid pulse or a slow, weak pulse • Nausea • Confusion • Acting strangely If a child exhibits any of these signs after being in a hot vehicle, cool the child rapidly by spraying them with cool water or with a garden hose -- never use an ice bath. Call 911 or your local emergency number immediately.

Children’s body temperatures can rise up to five times faster than that of an adult, and heatstroke can occur in temperatures as low as 57 degrees. On an 80-degree day, a car can reach deadly levels in just 10 minutes.

“Fifty-nine percent of all vehicle-related heatstroke deaths in children are caused by a child accidentally being left in the car, and 29 percent are from a child getting into a hot car on their own,” said Leach. “We want to get the word out to parents and caregivers, please look before you lock.”

Julie Dietrich is CHaD’s Child Passenger Safety Program Coordinator and the New Hampshire Child Passenger Safety Coordinator.

Sponsored BY

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ERED TO W T N IN E E G AR G N E W HAM N P TI

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2018

ParentingNH’s

FAMILY FAVORITES The award program that recognizes familyfriendly businesses, services, places and more.

Winners are chosen by YOU! Here's your chance to recognize those places, people and things that make New Hampshire a great place to raise a family. Cast your votes for NH‘s best in over 60 categories!

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out & about

Photo courtesy of Kate Wilcox

compiled by melanie Hitchcock

11 SATURDAY MILTON MILLS – Branch Hill Farm, 307 Applebee Road. This family-friendly celebration of the natural world features many fun and educational outdoor activities. Take a hayride, learn about rescued wild animals from Squam Lakes Science Center, use dip nets to find water creatures in the river, play with your child in nature’s playground in the woods, borrow a pole and take your kids fishing, help your kids saw a log and do crafts, watch demonstrations of traditional rural skills, take a discovery walk, and more. Rain or shine; no pets. Presented by Moose Mountains Regional Greenways and Branch Hill Farm. Admission: Adult, $5; family, $10; free for kids under 12. 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. www.mmrg.info/ festival 42 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

Wump Mucket Puppets

Free day at Shaker Village

2 THURSDAY

4 SATURDAY

PLAISTOW – Plaistow Library, 85 Main St. The Wump Mucket Puppets are taking their show to the Old West with “Tales from Bucket Gulch.” The puppets will tell a tall tale about biscuits, trying to find gold, and sharing the story of “The Cow Who Wouldn’t Moo,” featuring new puppet star Sarsaparilla the Cow. The audience will also enjoy western-themed songs and silliness, even a funky dance break.

The 30-minute show is perfect for buckeroos ages 3-10 and families. 3 p.m. Advanced registration required. Free. 382-6011

Photo courtesy of shakers.org

16th annual Woods, Water and Wildlife Festival

CANTERBURY – Canterbury Shaker Village, 288 Shaker Road.

Admission to the Village is free today, their way of saying thank you to the community. Enjoy a tour, explore the self-guided exhibit buildings, walk the nature trails, or bring a picnic to eat on lawn. In addition to regular tours, there will be a program designed for families with children and some in-depth examinations of Shaker life for knowledgeable visitors. Free. 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. www.shakers.org

Photo courtesy of michele jellison

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang 16 THURSDAY

Touch-ATruck 5 SUNDAY LINCOLN – Loon Mountain, 60 Loon Mountain Road. Perfect for that truck-obsessed kid (or kid-at-heart) in your life, Touch-aTruck is a celebration of diesel-powered awesomeness. Get up close and personal with snow cats, backhoes, telehandlers, and a whole bunch of other serious machines that keep Loon running through all four seasons.

Free. 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. www. loonmtn.com

Game Show Nite fundraiser 9 THURSDAY MANCHESTER – SEE Science Center, 200 Bedford St. Enlist your friends, family and co-workers to build a team with brain power.

Enjoy a night of friendly competition to benefit the SEE Science Center. Presented by St. Mary’s Bank, Game Show Nite will feature a live head-to-head buzzer round trivia game. The game will feature diverse categories.

Attendees are also invited to compete in STEM challenges throughout the night, raffle, and silent auction. This is a 21-plus event and advance tickets are required.

Tickets: $50 (include food and drink) 5 to 8 p.m.

669-0400; bit.ly/ SEEGameShow

NEW LONDON – New London Playhouse, 84 Main St. Take a ride on the magical car that sails across the sea and flies through the air in this exuberant musical adventure based on the classic movie.

Tickets: Adults, $15; children pay their age. 11 a.m. and 2 p.m.

Additional performances are Saturday, Aug. 18. 526-6710; www.nhlbarn.org

ters. and characAt dusk, unfold your lawn chair or lay out a blanket, relax and enjoy the show. The fun starts hours before dark with music, food, games, skydivers and activities for kids. 3 to 9:30 p.m. Go to website for details on ticket prices and to buy tickets. www.jaffreyfireworks.com

Fire on the Mountain Chili Fest

Friends of Aine Kids TRY-athlon 19 SUNDAY

End-of-summer reading party 18 SATURDAY NASHUA – Nashua Library, 2 Court St. Kids, teens, and adults are invited to an end-of-summerreading party. Play board games and giant games, listen to music, decorate cupcakes, and eat snacks. If it rains, the party will be indoors. Free. 2 to 4 p.m. www. nashualibrary.org

BEDFORD – Bedford town pool and high school. Aine loved to be outside doing things. In the winter time she was crazy for sledding and in summer she turned into a fish – when she wasn’t riding her bike or running around with her friends. The Kid’s TRY-athlon encompasses the three things Aine loved to do all summer: swim, bike and run. It’s is a race for all kids ages 4 to 15, no matter their athletic ability. Also games, prizes, raffles, music, pancake breakfast, face painting, obstacle course and more. 8 to 11 a.m. www.friendsofaine.com

19 SUNDAY HENNIKER – Pats Peak Ski Area, 686 Flanders Road.

Pair the heat in the forecast with some heat in your diet.

Restaurants face off in the professional chili-making category, while dedicated home chefs go toe-to-toe for best amateur chili chef. Sample as many of the nearly 40 chilies as you can stomach and enjoy the fest’s other offerings, including the Fire on the Mountain 5K, Car Cruise-In, KidZone, live music and a vendor fair. Sponsored by the Henniker Rotary Club. Admission: $6-$12. Noon to 4:30 p.m. www.chilinewhampshire.org.

Festival of Fireworks 18 SATURDAY JAFFREY – Jaffrey Airfield-Silver Ranch, 190 Turnpike Road. For 35 minutes, you won’t be able to contain your ohhhhs and ahhhhs as the night sky is filled with colors and the sounds of pyro-inspired music. This year’s theme is “superheroes” featuring music

by Soya Entertainment, games

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| august 2018 43

time out

Dog-friendly dates for the dog days of summer

by melanie hitchcock

I

t’s hot and you want to go out to take advantage of the summer weather that will be gone too soon. As you try to figure out what to do, he senses something is amiss. He sits staring up at you with those big brown eyes – eyes that say, “mom, you aren’t going to leave me here, are you?”

He’d be all set with a bowl of water and some kibble, but you can’t resist those puppy dog eyes.

If you’ve found a sitter for the kids, but you don’t want to leave the four-legged one at home, you have more options than taking a walk or playing in the park down the road.

BYOD (bring your own dog): Grab a beer and donate to a great cause at the same time. Yappy Hour, according to the New Hampshire SPCA, is “a fun opportunity for pet-loving individuals and their furry companions to spend an evening at their favorite local brewery.” This month, head to Redhook Brewery in Portsmouth (Aug. 8) or Smuttynose Brewing Co. in Hampton (Aug. 22). Find more dates and locations at www.nhspca.org.

Anheuser-Busch Merrimack Brewery and Biergarten also hosts a Yappy Hour every second Tuesday of the month through October from 6 to 8 p.m. (5 to 7 p.m. in October). Bring your four-legged friend and check out food and drink specials and door prizes. In August, $1

44 www.parentingnh.com | AUGUST 2018

from each beer sold will go to the Humane Society of Greater Nashua.

Pipe Dream Brewery in Londonderry is hosting a Pints 4 Paws event on Aug. 30; $1 from each beer will be donated to the Manchester Animal Shelter.

Canine cuisine: The City of Nashua passed a variance in the spring that allows restaurants to apply to offer dog-friendly outdoor dining. Places such as Martha’s Exchange and Riverwalk Café in downtown are fido-friendly. Other dining destinations like Backyard Brewery and Murphy’s Taproom in Manchester, and the Gas Light in Portsmouth also allow dogs on their decks.

Looking for a special meal for your dining companion? T-Bones Great American Eatery’s Bedford location offers its “Tails on the Terrace” menu.

Travel with your tail-wagger: If you are looking to get away for more than an evening, you can not only take your dog with you, but some places offer pooch perks.

Stonehurst Manor in North Conway describes itself as a pet-friendly retreat. When you check in you’ll get a personal note that includes information on hotel pet services and dog-walking routes. Your dog will also get raised food and water bowls, along with treats.

The NASWA resort in Laconia has rooms that are designated pet-friendly. According to their website, all guests checking in with a dog will receive a welcome kit with a listing of pet services in the area, treats and a pet toy. Your pet-friendly room comes with dog bedding, pet bowls and pet waste bags.