When it comes to depression, there is a difference. A huge difference. Someone can feel depressed without being depressed.

Consider a scenario or two. The first person is depressed. His wife announced that she wants a divorce. He was passed over for an expected promotion at work and then fired. The water heater flooded the house. The transmission went out. A close friend stabbed him in the back (figuratively). His dog died. No wonder he’s depressed.

The second person, by contrast, just got engaged to her childhood sweetheart. The day before that she won $250,000 on a scratch-off ticket. This week she paid off her car two years early — and that was before the scratch-off. But for some reason that even she does not understand she’s not enjoying any of it. She can’t shake the feeling that she doesn’t deserve any of it. She’s depressed too.

Can you see the difference between feeling depressed and being depressed? Feeling depressed, as the first person is, usually has a reason. The feelings are logical and natural. Being depressed, as is the second person, is not only without reason, it persists despite big reasons for not being depressed.

The difference: depression is not a feeling; it’s an illness. Most people who deal with depression have been told more than once, “You have a great life. What do you have to be depressed about?” Or maybe, “I know exactly what you’re going through. I’ve had bad days myself.”

Those are no doubt well-intentioned comments, but they belie a complete lack of understanding about depression. When everyone grasps the all-important distinction between feeling depressed and being depressed, we’ll all be better off.