Reinventing yourself

Reinvent Yourself Page 1

Bert Cherian

“You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” ~C. S. Lewis

I

was talking to a friend on the phone. Her voice

hinted something was amiss. There was a faint catch in her throat. As a coach, these kind of things jump out at me.

‘Something is not right… what happened?’ I asked.

Nothing.

I kept quiet, stretching the silence, Finally, she said: ‘My husband of twenty years walked out’ ‘Did you see it coming?’

‘No’. She replied.

After commiserating with her, I asked the inevitable question. ‘So what’s Plan B?’ ‘I guess, I’ll have to reinvent myself.’ she said.

I like that. Really. Its courageous. Bold. Daring.

Remember a traumatic time in your life? You had to leave a job or your spouse said they did not want to Page 2

relate with you anymore. Or losing a loved one. The core question? We have to take control of who we will become when such things happen.

I’ve reinvented myself several times in my life. Most adults have. Like when economic downturn happened and I lost my business in Chennai. It wasn’t fun. It wasn’t pretty. Or when my parents passed away and I felt desperately alone.

And then I’ve had to reinvent myself. Each time I’ve done it, I’ve forged my new path deliberately and with some hard thinking. But before that lets look at the Default Future.

That’s you. You have a past and you’re standing in the Present. What you must get clear is that there is a Default Future. That’s the future that will happen if you don’t do anything different.

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What’s the Default Future for a Retired Person?

I’m sure you have your answers to this question. Here are a few.

‘Live a boring life.’

‘Talk about aches and pains with my friends.’

‘Not enough savings for the next twenty years.’

‘Watch TV till the cows come home.’

‘The mutual funds and pension don’t stretch enough’

What’s the Actual Future?

If you think the Default Future is bad, the Actual Future is a lot worse than you think. As you walk towards it, you

find that the Actual Future is way down there. You feel more and more helpless, more dejected, more lost.

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Being Sick and Tired of being sick and tired!

I hope by now you’re ready to sling the Default Future and the Actual Future out of the window. That’s not a bad thing at all. Sometimes a push in the right direction may be the best thing to happen. However you need more than a push, you also need something to pull you forward. Let me explain.

So where’s the Sunrise?

Have you waited for the future to find you? In some rare cases, a positive turn of events happens. But I’ve found that most of the time when I’ve waited for my future to find me, I’ve waited in vain.

So what should one do? Time for reinvention.

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Step #1: Release the Past Sit quietly, close your eyes, and imagine the past. The purpose of the past is to inform you, but not control you.

The thought that comes to you is: I am not my past. I am grateful for the experiences, what what I learnt and the people I met. That was then.

You forgive yourself for the chances that you didn’t take.

You forgive yourself for the unwise decisions you made.

You forgive yourself for harbouring regrets.

And now you release it. Some great memories. Some painful ones. You let go. You walk away. This is now.

Complete.

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Step #2: Imagine the future that you want Imagine how it will feel to be in that new place. Imagine yourself walking away from the past and into the future.

The Desired Future.

Picture the sunrise coming up.

Stand for a moment and silently voice your gratitude to God for everything that came before. Now turn toward the Desired Future.

You see that you are purposefully engaged.

You are adding value to people.

And they are adding value back to you.

You are emotionally secure.

You are doing financially better.

It’s a fresh, new world.

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Step #3: See that there are Many Futures You’ve heard it said: the future is written on your forehead. Maybe that’s true. But what if I told you that you have the pen in your hand? That there are many possible futures in front of you?

There are futures F1 and F2 and F3 and F…

You may decide that you’re going to travel the world. Or get obsessive about your health. Or fulfil a hobby like gardening or play bridge or chess. Or find a new vocation.

The question now is: which one do you want? The future is chosen. Always. Either we will choose it or someone will choose it for us because we abdicate and give up the privilege.

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Should you choose a new Vocation?

Lets face the facts. The future is going to be expensive.

At least more than you thought fifteen years back. A friend just wrote in saying: I am looking for financial soundness for the future. I am an unfortunate team member of the age group who has been deceived from pension schemes.

Sounds familiar?

Is just any old job good enough?

Sometimes when things don’t look too good, we take any ride that’s coming our way. But think. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life in a mindless job? Probably not.

What Market Valued Skills will make sense?

You must leverage your experience You must leverage your connections And you’ll have to reinvent yourself with new market valued skills. That’s new skills the market is willing to pay for.

What was useful some years back is not valuable anymore. Remember stenographers? Or bank tellers? Or darkroom technicians? Or compounders? Or milk men?

But before we get to that, lets look at one more paradigm.

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Thrills, Skills & Bills

If you have the skills and it thrills you, then that’s a hobby.

If you have the skills and it pays the bills that’s a job.

If you have all three, that’s a fulfilling career!

How could we help you?

We are a company that does executive education and business consulting. To scale our growth we are looking for senior people who are willing to become Business Coaches with us.

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Who should become a Business Coach?
 This role is not for everyone though.

Its for people who: Like to help people grow Who have good listening skills Who are willing to mentor younger professionals Who are willing to work 3-4 hours a day Who are willing to learn Business Coaching It’s one option where what thrills you - helping people - meets your skills - as a business coach meets your bills!

To know more about becoming a Meta Certified Business Coach mail us at response@metaresults.com

www.metaresults.com

Bert Cherian is an author, entrepreneur and executive coach. He is passionate about building people and organisations.

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