Home ¢ The Rev Bernard Chao is a Lecturer in Practical Theology at Trinity Theological College.
Make time for our youth or lose them over time
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n January, Christians in Singapore were jolted by news of a “self-radicalised” 16-year-old “Protestant Christian” who had planned to carry out a violent attack on Muslims at two mosques. 1 We know little of the context or causes that led him to such ideas and actions. This troubling news is an uncomfortable reminder to attend faithfully and fully to our core concern of Christian discipleship. If we pay attention to and make time for our youth, we inoculate our youth against, and create a social environment that is resistant to, radical, dehumanising and destructive ideologies that have nothing to do with Jesus. This requires intention and constant and consistent attention. There are many ideologies and activities that compete for the attention and loyalty of our young people and call them away from Christ and Christian community. Radical extremist ideologies are just one. Loving, engaging, involving and discipling our youth is how the church is called to disciple and teach our young. We either make time for our youth or lose them over time. I suggest three ways in which we can meaningfully engage our young people: intentional parenting, shifting our focus from Church programming to persons, and modelling friendship across ethnic and religious lines.
greater outsourcing of the primary parental responsibility for discipling our children to Sunday schools and youth ministries. Increasingly, we have grown in over-dependence on full-time children and youth workers for the discipling of our young. Intentional parenting recovers the ancient role of parents as primary religious educators. In Deuteronomy 6, the commands concerning the nature, worship and love of God are followed immediately by instructions for parents. Parents are tasked with the work of discipling our children to know and follow our Lord. We are to model faithfulness, engage our children in spiritual conversations about God and life, be alert to teachable moments in the course of life and surround our lives with reminders of God’s goodness, grace and commands. Intentional parenting is not optional. We are all called to active, intentional and competent parenting. We spend an inordinate amount of time studying (and paying) for certificates and degrees for our careers. How much time and effort do we put into learning how to parent? Many parents start strong in preparing for the birth of babies and the early life of toddlers. Few prepare intentionally for the adolescent years when the challenges are both profound and nuanced.
Intentional Parenting The primary youth ministers in the Church are parents— not the Sunday school teacher, not the youthworker, not the youth cell leader. A slow confluence of social shifts and changes in congregational practices has resulted in
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METHODIST MESSAGE March 2021
Developing a relationship with our adolescent children so that they feel safe to share uncomfortable thoughts, deep feelings, frustrations and unsettling questions takes time. It also takes a consistent practice of exercising patience, faith
