Metro Herald, Thursday, April 3, 2014

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Thursday, April 3, 2014

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From the catwalk to the studio »p15

Who left hoax at Shatter’s house?

Molly Spain, 13, from St Brendan’s Community School, Birr, Co Offaly, with her Jeddy Bears, at the County and City Enterprise Boards’ 12th Annual Student Enterprise Awards National Final, at Croke Park yesterday. Jeddy Bears is a unique soft toy made from a child’s favourite jumper or blanket. A record 17,000-plus Irish students signed up to the awards this year Picture: Photocall A

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TAOISEACH Enda Kenny has described an anti-semitic hoax threat to Alan Shatter as a ‘new low’ in Irish politics. Army bomb experts were called to the home of Justice Minister to deal with a suspicious package containing white powder and racist abuse early yesterday morning. It was quickly declared a hoax and declared safe at about 10.45am. Mr Kenny told the Dáil the material proved to be harmless when analysed, but that the incident was a low point for the Irish political system, which has seen Jewish representatives for most of the mainstream parties through the years. He added that a ‘stream of similar material’ has also been sent to the Department of Justice. Gardaí are investigating the incident, Mr Kenny said. Last year, Mr Shatter was targeted by antisemitic posters in Limerick, reportedly posted by a far-right extremist group. In recent weeks the Justice Minister has come under huge political pressure over his

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Grin and bear it

by Brian huTTon

role in a number of controversies involving the Gardaí. Last week, Garda Commissioner Martin Callinan stood down after revelations of a secret system recording telephone calls at Garda stations since the 1980s, which could impact on the outcome of past and present court cases. A legal action by former English journalist Ian Bailey for wrongful arrest in the investigation into the 1996 murder of French film producer Sophie Toscan du Plantier in west Cork exposed the recording system. A State inquiry has been launched into the recordings. Two other investigations into the suspected bugging of the Garda watchdog’s headquarters and whistleblower allegations of wrongdoing within the force are expected to be completed later this month. Last night, Mr Shatter survived a Fianna Fáil Dáil motion of no confidence by 95 votes to 51.

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METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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Thursday 03/04/14 How to contact us

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From the archives (2009):

The trillion-dollar piece of history

British premier Gordon Brown marked the ‘beginning of the end’ of the recession as G20 leaders agreed to inject $1trillion into global markets including quadrupling IMF cash to struggling countries, a $250bn trade boost and $250bn in country credits.

Today’s birthdays

Doris Day, actress, 92; Richard Thompson, guitarist and songwriter, 65; Alec Baldwin, actor, 56; Leona Lewis, singer, 29; Amanda Bynes, actress, 28 (pictured).

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The solutions from 1 to 12 are all six-letter words ending with the letter E in the centre. Moving clockwise from 1, the letters in the outer circle will spell out the name of a US playwright and screenwriter. 1. Tropical forest 8. Small 2. Insightful 9. Tame 3. Interfere 10. Centre 4. Tempt 11. Reach one’s 5. Caress destination 6. Group of 12. Hint geese Yesterday’s solution: 7. Citrus fruit Leonard Sachs

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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

Indian labourer addicted to eating bricks prefers rubble to mother’s fried chicken

I’ve put on a few stones Would you like some mortar eat for your brickfast? Pakkirappa Hunagundi bites into a brick, which he then chews PIcture: Barcroft

BITING into his favourite snack, Pakkirappa Hunagundi proves there are worse cravings than a weakness for rock cakes. The 30-year-old is addicted to eating bricks, gravel and mud, and can happily chomp his way through 3kg (7lb) of rubble a day. His disorder is thought to be caused by a condition called pica, which is characterised by an appetite for substances without any nutritional

by AIDAn RADnEDgE value. Mr Hunagundi has been eating bricks and rocks for 20 years and said he prefers the taste to his mother’s fried chicken. ‘It feels like a necessity to me. I can skip meals but not bricks or mud,’ he added. ‘I have suffered no side-effects. My teeth are absolutely fine. I can bite into the hardest stone

without a problem.’ The labourer’s tastes have drawn people to his village to watch him eat. A friend, who asked him to stop, said: ‘When he comes to our field, he goes around eating mud. He relishes hot charcoal too like a snack.’ Mr Hunagundi, from Karnataka, south-west India, hopes to showcase his talent nationwide. ‘I want to show people what I can do. I want to earn some money,’ he added.

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METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

Rapist back in jail over child porn A mAN previously jailed for repeatedly raping and sexually abusing a child has had the suspended portion of his sentence reactivated for possessing and distributing child pornography. The 33-year-old Clare man, who cannot be named for legal reasons, received a sentence of seven years with two years suspended in 2010 after pleading guilty to three charges of sexual assault. Judge mary ellen ring reactivated the sentence at Dublin Circuit Criminal Court.

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Local knowledge a must for taxis under new rules by jOAnnE AHERn

UNIVerSAL health insurance will ‘lead to the most radical reform of our health services in decades and will result in a fairer, more effective health service’, minister for Health James reilly said as he launched the white paper on the issue. Under the system, ‘everyone will be insured and will have a choice of insurer and everyone will have equal access to a standard package of services’. The programme will be fully implemented by 2019 but the opposition criticised an absence of costing in the white paper.

Bank to pay for home duty bill BANK of Ireland is to refund stamp duty to first time buyers for home loans drawn down by September 30. The payback will be equivalent to one per cent of the mortgage. In a statement, the bank said house affordability is now at its best level since 1998 and believes many first-time buyers have saved sizeable deposits. Ken murray of the Association of expert mortgage Advisors warned that first time buyers should make sure they are ‘content with the long-term offer’ on mortgages.

Picture: PA

‘Radical’ reform of health service

Showing solidarity for event to mark women’s league Members of the defence forces who formed an all-female guard of honour for President Michael D Higgins at a ceremony in Glasnevin Cemetery, to mark the centenary year of the foundation of Cumann na mBan, relax after the event yesterday. At the ceremony President Higgins said Ireland has still much to do to achieve equality between men and women a century after the founding of the

women’s revolutionary movement. Mr Higgins said Cumann na mBan’s vision remained a promise of what could be achieved in modern Ireland. Cumann na mBan was founded on April 2, 1914, at a public meeting in Dublin’s Wynn’s Hotel, when thousands of women signed up to help in the fight for Irish independence. A plaque will be unveiled at Wynn’s Hotel today by Heritage Minister Jimmy Deenihan

TAXI drivers will have to prove they know how to get from A to B in the area in which they operate, under new regulations. Public Transport Minister Alan Kelly announced that drivers who have been the subject of ‘three substantiated complaints’ of poor local knowledge will be required to resit the knowledge test if they are to keep their licence. ‘If they fail it, they’ll be off the road,’ Mr Kelly said. It’s one of a number of new regulations aimed at boosting consumer confidence in the sector which will also put restrictions on student visa holders driving taxis and will set a maximum payment charge for credit debit card holders. Drivers will also see their tax compliance monitored and there will be restrictions on advertising on vehicles. Meanwhile, the number of taxi enforcement officers is being trebled under Operation Taximeter, with the appointment of 15 new team members. Mr Kelly said enforcement is ‘the most significant issue’ that taxi drivers face. He also said that the taxi market relies on ‘consumer confidence in a safe, reliable and high-quality service’ and he believes these new regulations will instil that confidence. National Irish Taxi Association spokesman Jerry Brennan said: ‘I don’t think the ordinary full-time taxi driver who has all of his licences correct and his vehicle standards correct has anything to worry about.’

Mary Lou: Ex Rehab chief ‘not off the hook’ Former rehab chief Angela Kerins has been warned she is not off the hook in the scandal over her salary after quitting her position. The former midwife, who left her €250,000 role in the not-for-profit disability organisation – which receives €83million from the State, and had a turnover of €183m in 2012 – had, along with rehab, repeatedly refused to divulge her salary and only

bowed to pressure as the Public Accounts Committee (PAC) ordered an inquiry in late February. Issues have arisen into why rehab’s lottery scratch card scheme barely turns a profit and the role of Fine Gael strategist and former Ceo Frank Flannery, who quit rehab last month over a suggested conflict of interest. The PAC is pursuing rehab over ms Kerins’ wages and the pay of 12

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executives who were on €100,000 or more a year but also information on contracts signed with companies with links to senior figures in the charity. Sinn Féin TD mary Lou mcDonald said she expects full co-operation from ms Kerins due back before PAC on April 10. She said: ‘If Angela Kerins has resigned in the vain hope that this will let her off the hook with the PAC, then she is sorely mistaken.’

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Gamer plays WOW for 30hours straight A GAMER has broken the world record for the longest video game marathon on a multiplayer online role-playing game. Kinumi Cati (pictured) reportedly spent 30 hours and 31 minutes playing fantasy epic World Of Warcraft in a continuous session, breaking the previous best of 24 hours. She completed the feat in a hotel room in northern Spain, watched by six witnesses, on Sunday.

Man held after crashing car into Trinity front gate

picture: conor mccabe

‘Special K’ is used to treat depression THE drug Ketamine has been ‘successfully’ used to treat people with depression. The hallucinogenic – best known as a horse tranquilliser before its adoption by clubbers – is a ‘promising treatment’, psychiatrist Dr Rupert McShane said. ‘We’ve seen remarkable changes in people who’ve had depression for many years that no other treatment has touched,’ he added. The drug was given by injection to 28 NHS patients in the UK who reported improved mental wellbeing, the Journal of Psychopharmacology reports today.

Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

KNOW THE CODE: Coderdojo members James Breslin and Niamh Scanlon help launch Coolest Projects Awards 2014, which take place at The Helix in DCU on June 7 to 8. CoderDojo is inviting young coders from the CoderDojo Community to come along to showcase their projects

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A MAN has been arrested after a car by ED cARTy was driven through the front gates ing company that was entering the of Trinity College Dublin. The incident took place at about grounds. ‘The driver proceeded to ram into 6.30am yesterday when a driver burst through the old wooden doors the historic entrance a number of times, succeeding eventually to at the College Green entrance. Gardaí said a number of vehicles break through it, causing damage,’ in the university grounds were dam- the spokeswoman said. College security staff attempted to aged when the car was driven on to the campus and through the locked stop the car but failed and pursued it as made its way through the front gates. The car involved in the incident entrance and into the grounds. The driver then drove back tothen drove the wrong way up Dawson Street near the college where a wards the historic front gates of the number of other cars were dam- university which had been closed by the security staff. aged. Nobody was inGardaí managed jured in the incito stop the car on dent. the street and the Trinity said the 68-year-old man front entrance to was taken to Store the university Street station for would remain questioning. closed for the rest A spokeswoman of the day to allow for Trinity said for repairs and it the car drove on is expected to reoto the campus afpen today. The ter following a front door has van used by a been removed. contracted clean- Damaged: The Trinity gates

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METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

WhatsApp messages pass 64bn in one day WHATSAPP has set a new record for the number of messages it has handled in 24 hours. The service sent and delivered more than 64billion messages – an increase of 137 per cent since this time last year. The app, intended as a cheap alternative to texting, was bought by Facebook for €13.2billion in February. It now has 465million active users, despite privacy concerns. The milestone came as Spotify revealed its plans to fend off competition from iTunes and YouTube. The music streaming service has been redesigned to make organising songs easier. Spotify director Michelle Kadir said the changes were to help users ‘enjoy the bestlooking experience of any music service’.

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I’ve got a saw neck Power tool cuts into tree cutter’s shoulder

Sawce of the trouble: X-ray image shows blade lodged in tree surgeon’s body PicTures: AP/KDKA

wholly thursday

A TREE surgeon ended up by DANIEL BINNS needing surgery after a chainsaw sliced through his shoul- powerlines when the accident happened in Ross, Pennsylvader and lodged in his neck. James Valentine was trim- nia, on Monday. ‘It was a freak accident that ming branches in a harness 6m above ground when he can happen any second, any lost control of the tool and felt time,’ he said. He had emergency surgery ‘the worst pain you could imbut even though the saw cut agine’. His colleagues lowered him 5cm (2in) into his neck musdown and gave him first aid – cles he hopes to be discharged but left the blade in place to from hospital this week and be back on the job inside a try to stem the bleeding. X-rays taken before it was fortnight. ‘Most people don’t walk out removed showed how perilously close he came to sever- of the hospital so soon after ing an artery and bleeding to such an accident,’ said trauma surgeon Dr Christine Toevs. death. ‘He is extraordinarily lucky ‘Seeing the blood squirting out, that was the scariest part,’ and very blessed.’ Mr Valentine’s boss Mr Valentine told reporters from his hospital bed. ‘Every- Dominic Migliozzi said it was ‘amazing’ that he thing was going had survived the through my head – a ordeal. About lot of stuff. The first 36,000 people are instinct was to turn injured by chainoff the saw.’ saws every year in The 21-year-old the US but most had moved the tool wounds are to close to his face to avoid overhanging Sliced: Mr Valentine hands and legs.

Travelling back in (texting) time, KEN ROGAN takes a gander at the world of internet advertising and realises the power of the web lies in ‘listicles’

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ust back from holidays. I went to 1998. Seriously. That’s what happens when your smartphone breaks and you buy a stop-gap replacement called the ‘Swansong Flintstone’ – sorry – ‘Samsung Keystone 2’ for the princely sum of €20. I walked out the door and back in time. And Gadzooks! The texting! Old school texting is like tapping out mayday in Morse code. Dot-dotdash. Dot-dash-dot. Of course by now the Titanic has fully sunk and all you’ve summoned up is ‘ice-b’. It’s funny how primitive things are when new technology arrives. Especially advertising. Early TV ads were just pictures with voiceovers. Early internet banner ads were just as plain, and now it’s clear they don’t work, what are the poor advertisers to do (apart from hijack YouTube clips)? The current answer seems to be pretending that ads aren’t ads. This might amount to some faux-poignant garbage along the lines of ‘strangers kissing for the first time’. More generically though, as the internet settles into the uniformity

of ‘flat-design’ websites where every post has a headline, image and hashtag, who is to say what’s news, what’s cool, and hey – what’s the difference anymore? This is news-vertising! Irish sites still flag their paid-for content (advertorials), but that’s not always the case for the likes of Buzzfeed, where what’s cool, interesting and commercial all get mashed up into a giant nonsense list, or ‘listicle’. This might just be a fad, or it might be the way English composition is taught in five years, so just in case, here are the rules: 1. Numbers. Numbering things makes it easier for people to keep reading – because they’re idiots.

Say what? Distracting liquid cheese

Numbers also absolve you from connecting your previous point with your next one. 2. Liquified cheese. 3. See? 4. Put numbers in the title too. Broadly speaking, it should be less than ten for something serious and 17+ for nonsense, e.g. ‘Eight things you need to know about Obamacare’ vs. ‘63 incredibly powerful pet poems’. 5. Hyperbole. Make ludicrous claims about the unmissability of this OM-freakin’-G clip which you just HAVE to see right now!!! They read as though written by punters, not copywriters, and they’re very effective at hooking internetaddicted teens who have only had four or five legitimate experiences anyway. Things should be ‘awesome’ and ‘game-changing’ at all times, or you might just remember that you’re sitting in front of a computer. 6. Include a funny flow-chart. It looks like work, but it’s hilarious! And designers have nothing else to do now that the internet all looks the same. 7. Enhance your list items with

ers? Since when did self-destrucgifs (short, repeating clips) and tive cycles of profit-driven lunacy videos. Actually here the web is stop us? Besides by the time that genuinely pioneering a new happens we’ll all be wearing approach, which makes for Google’s head-mounted dork excellent sports analysis. Newspapers can’t do it, TV costs too much, screens and our retina will be donated to 24-hour infomercials. and anyway, who wants to hear The endgame is leasing our brain John Giles say: ‘If you could just cells to advertisers so that we hold it there..?’ 8. Be risqué. Or more bluntly, say interrupt our own conversations ‘with these important mesit with bikinis. Or food sages’. porn. Or fashion In the meantime, newsporn. Or holiday porn. Or Numbering things vertisement isn’t without value, and many property porn. makes it easier for comic of today’s ‘burning Porn is okay issues’ could stand a now, HBO says people to keep little listicle-enlivening: so. reading – because ‘Seven ways Enda 9. Use they’re idiots should life hack Alan swearwords. Shatter’s ejector seat’ or (I’m jealous of this ‘Gardaí hack your phone one) records for insurance companies’ 10. Act like life ends at or ‘Four incredibly powerful 30. And finally: business magnates who don’t pay 11. Describe commonsense tax’ or ‘8,000 square miles to hide solutions to everyday problems as a plane in’. ‘life-hacks’. Anyway, well done for making it So who cares if blending to the end, and if you didn’t: 1) was ‘content’ with commercial messages ultimately costs you your it something I said? 2) Liquified credibility, followed by your web cheese. 3) Happy Thursday. traffic, followed by your advertis@kenrogan


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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

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METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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Alex: I’m really a shy little Monkey ey

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e’s known for his cocky and baffling awards acceptance speeches but Alex Turner insists he is uneasy being a famous frontman – and claims he is lonely in the bedroom. The Arctic Monkeys singer said he hides behind his hit songs when he takes to the stage in front of fans. ‘I’m in a difficult position in the sense that, preposterous as this might sound, I don’t like being the centre of attention,’ the 28-year-old claimed. ‘I get up on stage every night and play songs but I almost feel the songs are the centre of attention. ‘I don’t even like opening my birthday presents in front of people, either.’ At times his uneasiness is clear to see after he became a laughing stock for delivering a rambling speech about the death of rock’n’roll at the Brits earlier this year. But he insists he can laugh at himself – and pinpointed what he believes is a key ingredient to surviving in showbiz. ‘Certainly, in this day and age, a sense of humour,’ the Crying Lightning

by ANDREI HARMSWORTH singer said. ‘Because it’s pretty ridiculous. Not to name-drop but we bumped into Robert Plant last night and he’s hilarious. Just funny, straight away. These days I think if you start taking it too seriously, which I’m, like, sometimes definitely in danger of doing… then it gets ugly.’ Meanwhile, the sheffieldborn rocker, who dated Alexa Chung, admitted his band’s tunes are mostly about the action – or lack of – with ladies in the bedroom. The Los Angeles resident told esquire

magazine: ‘I write about women, yes. I haven’t really found a way round it yet. ‘There’s other things I eventually might get round to writing about. But for now… in a sense they’re about girls. But in a sense they’re about loneliness. And longing.’ Read the full Arctic Monkeys interview in the esquire May issue out today.

See the ffunny side: Alex Turner Tur tries not to take himself hims too seriously

PictuRe: simon emmett

Put the Brit in Rixton! New band Rixton are poised to take the world by storm – but regret not milking their Us connections to meet Britney spears. The lads – Jake Roche, Charley Bagnall, Lewi Morgan and Danny Wilkin – failed to bag tickets to spears’ sin City show despite being managed by scooter Braun and being mates with Justin Bieber. ‘I’m a huge Britney fan so I’m gutted we didn’t get to see her. And we could’ve got free tickets as well because we’ve got the same booking agent. I’m an idiot,’ 21-year-old Roche moaned. To make matters worse, it was his best chance to meet his idol.

‘I was probably about six or seven when she first released music and she was my first crush. she was in that school uniform and I was like, “Mum, what’s this feeling?” Not really!’ speaking of ‘mum’, Roche is from good showbiz stock as his parents are shane Richie and Coleen Nolan – with the latter seemingly having sleepless nights about his chosen career path. ‘My mum is so worried, bless her,’ he said. ‘she calls every day and is like, “Are you being nice to everyone? Are you speaking to everyone? Have you got clean underwear?” she has brought me up well!’ But Loose Women star Nolan may

Dancing queen: Rita Ora leaves Boujis after a night of pulling shapes PictuRe: XPosuRe

Rita has near-miss as she struggles to stay in frock soon have something to worry about as Jake hopes his role as frontman will make him a hit with the ladies. ‘A lot of people say being in bands gets you a lot of girls but I haven’t experienced it yet. But it is very early days. Although I’ll be honest, my game is terrible,’ he admitted. Me And My Broken Heart by Rixton is this out summer.

t +353 91 894 800 e stay@harbour.ie www.harbour.ie

Things were not all white on the night for Rita Ora when she came close to suffering a wardrobe malfunction in front of clubbers. The 23-year-old stole the show when she ducked into Boujis after attending The Glamour of Italian Fashion exhibition at the Victoria & Albert Museum on Tuesday night. But she almost gave revellers an eyeful when she jumped around on the dance floor in a low-cut shredded white frock. A clubber said: ‘Rita was dancing like she was in one of her own music videos. She almost fell out her dress while she was dancing but managed to adjust her frock in the nick of time.’ She was the last one standing and stayed until the club closed.

Subject to availability, terms & conditions.


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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

Keira Knightley has revealed she has lost out on jobs because of her looks. The 29year-old told Madame Figaro magazine: ‘Being pretty is a double-edged sword – your look gets you certain roles but disqualifies you from others. That’s the way it goes.’

We were KO’d by Beyoncé B eyoncé faces a legal fight after two fans claimed they were knocked out and left with broken bones in a stampede at one of her concerts. She is being sued by Raquel castellanos and Gabriella Davidson, who say they were injured as they waited to get into the show in chicago. The ‘long-time’ followers of the pop princess found themselves floored by a ‘rushing mob’ when the gates were opened and people poured in, it is alleged. There were no barriers in place and gig-goers entered ‘without instruction or any reasonable system to permit an orderly entrance’, the pair claim. castellanos and Davidson, who have filed a lawsuit at cook county circuit court in Illinois, say they turned up early in the hope of bagging a prime spot to

PICTURE: EPA

by ANDREI HARMSWORTH

watch their idol at the United center. But, as the crowd grew, they were ‘more anxious about how, when and where the gates would be released and where ticket-holders and fans were supposed to enter – none of which was explained’. They are seeking undisclosed damages from Beyoncé, the venue and the concert’s promoter Live nation. All three parties were negligent for failing to hold back the surging horde, they claim, adding: ‘The United center encouraged it by the set-up which it created and controlled.’ The lawsuit comes as an awkward footnote to Bey’s triumphant Mrs carter Tour. The 32year-old waved an emotional goodbye to fans at the end of the final gig in Portugal last week.

My Thrones turn Miley’s grief as has given me more street cred Floyd goes Michael McElhatton says he has escaped any public hostility following his treacherous turn in season three of Game of Thrones. The Dublin actor (pictured) plays Roose Bolton, a focal figure in last year’s dramatic Red Wedding scenes, but has thus far escaped the wrath of the HBO series’ hardcore fans, he tells Gareth Makim. ‘I’m getting more respect actually, I’m not getting hit with eggs or anything,’ McElhatton said ahead of Monday’s season four premiere. ‘I think Jack Gleeson [who plays boy king Joffrey] gets a harder time, and so he should! People approach me with heads down and with my official title, Lord Bolton.’ Lord Bolton’s Red Wedding power play ensures a more central role for McElhatton as George RR Martin’s epic progresses, but that hasn’t stopped him from peeking ahead for some reassurance, especially as he sees limited action in the upcoming season.

Lawsuit: Two fans claim they were hurt in a rush at one of Beyoncé’s concerts

to kennel in sky

‘You can’t help but look ahead, there’s Wikipedia and all sorts of other ways of finding out. Some people don’t, and I’ve stopped reading the books, but it’s nice to know if you’re still in it! ‘Bolton was kept very much on the sidelines in series two and three and now he’s played his hand. We’ll get to see more of what he’s really like, not so much in season four, but more in season five. I’m not in this season very much, but once again there’s a huge shift in power for a lot of characters and how the repercussions of the Red Wedding play out.’ Game Of Thrones Season 4 starts on Monday, 9pm, on Sky Atlantic

Miley Cyrus says she is ‘broken’ and wishes she had died with her favourite dog, Floyd, who has barked his last. The 21-year-old appeared inconsolable after her Alaskan klee kai pooch went to the big kennel in the sky. ‘Today is the 2nd worst day of my life,’ she revealed in a tweet on Tuesday. ‘I don’t want it to be real... But my precious baby Floyd has passed away.’ The singer, who has three other dogs, is so distraught that she even went as far as to wish he’d taken her with him. ‘What am I gonna do without him?’ she asked.

Teen fame may have ruined me

Singer John Martin said he would have gone mad if he had been a teenager when he found fame with Swedish House Mafia. ‘I’m pretty sure I would have been going crazy and ending up in rehab,’ the 33-year-old told Guilty Pleasures after his first solo single Anywhere For You was released this week. ‘But I’ve found a balance, I love to party but if I do that seven days a week I get depressed and lose my voice. But if I don’t party at all… I need to empty my brains once in a while because sometimes your brain’s on a loop.’

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10 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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news@metroherald.ie

Afterlife avatar lets you speak from the grave... A

S taglines go, it’s a pretty catchy one: ‘Simply become immortal’. That is the ambitious message on the homepage of website Eterni.me. It’s a service that will attempt to give you an afterlife avatar, a digital recreation of you which will communicate with your loved ones after you die. It all sounds a bit like Be Right Back, an episode of Charlie Brooker’s Black Mirror TV series, in which a grieving woman talks to her dead partner through social media. While the co-founder of Eterni.me name checks Black Mirror, as well as the writings of sci-fi authors Isaac Asimov and Philip K Dick, as an influence, he insists the idea is a lot less sinister than what is often depicted in popular culture. ‘It’s more curating a digital legacy during your lifetime – and not a social network for the dead,’ said Eterni.me chief executive Marius Ursache. ‘There’s a lot of work to be done in order to create an accurate

More than

18,000

people have signed up to be a digital avatar after they die through Eterni.me

Would you like to have a life after death in the form of an avatar that can talk via video to the loved ones you left behind? The man behind this life – and death – changing i dea tells ROSS McGUINNESS it isn’t as creepy as it sounds avatar – and the work needs to be done by the live person.’ To become an avatar on Eterni.me after death, and more than 18,000 people have already signed up, the hard work begins while you are alive. Ursache says the service is not about cobbling together a likeness of someone who is already dead without their permission. Those who want to become an avatar are involved in the process. This will mean taking their digital footprint and turning it into something bigger and more cohesive – cohesive enough to communicate with the relatives they leave behind when they are gone. Eterni.me will collect data from a participant’s history on platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Google, as well

as photo and email files, and use artificial intelligence algorithms to create a virtual persona. This avatar will then chat with living relatives through video or instant messaging. Eterni.me compares it to ‘a Skype chat from the past’. Ursache said: ‘You will need to have a live person to make it work, not a deceased one. ‘Allowing relatives to upload the data of deceased people cannot work right now – the digital data which is available is not enough to generate an accurate profile, and it will result in something which can be upsetting, and not a good memory of the deceased person.’ The idea is to take someone’s data and ‘condense it in a digital alterego’, said Ursache, which could tell relatives its thoughts on a range of

1 9 in

topics, including marriage, career and family. ‘A richer memory – compared to a photo album or a dusty DVD – would make them remember more about the loved ones who pass away,’ he said. ‘We’re building a product for living people to curate their memories, not a grieving solution.’

his head for a decade. ‘one of my ideas, which dates back more than ten years, was to create a website where the navigation would be a chatbot that you can talk to in order to find out what’s on that site – and make it learn new things based on the questions it receives over time. ‘I never got to do it, but the whole thought process had an influence on the Eterni.me concept.’ he admitted Eterni.me has already had its ‘share of detractors’ who think the idea is morbid. ‘We have people who want to volunteer, people who want to be beta testers, people who want to get hired or invest, and are enthusiastic about the product,’ he said. ‘We have others who say that what we do is creepy and wish us to go to hell or fail – whichever is worse. ‘But the most emotional thing is we’ve received messages from people who are terminally ill and would want to use our product as soon as it’s available. We are very aware of the emotionality that is attached to the topic of death. ‘We do not want to preserve the banalities of the life of a person, but would like to create a legacy that allows your grandchildren to interact with their great grandfather.’ Ursache is confident afterlife avatars are coming – it’s just a matter of who can get it right. The reason it will happen, he says, is simple. ‘Nobody wants to be forgotten.’

A

LThoUGh Ursache is in Romania and cofounder Nicolas Lee is in Canada, the plan is to build a base in Boston – the idea came out of a development programme for entrepreneurs at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Eterni.me wants to have a proof of concept for the idea within the next three months before securing funding. It is hoped the site will be up and running in 2016. Ursache has already signed up as ‘User #1’. The basis for Eterni.me is something he has been kicking around in

people have made their funeral wishes known to loved ones More than

28,000

people died in Ireland last year

15% 21% 12%

of people want to live forever

of 18-24-year-olds of over-65s want want to be immortal to keep going

A funeral plot can cost up to

₧16,000 84.2%

of Irish people say they are Catholics

Sources: Eterni.me, Institute of Education, Dying Matters, ComRes, National Association of Funeral Directors, UK Funerals

35%

of people have made a will


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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

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12 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

World

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digest

Crashed drones ‘on a A ‘third gender’ is mission for n Korea’ recognised by court

sOuTH KOREA: Two drones that crashed on a border island were sent by North Korea on surveillance missions, according to authorities in Seoul. They were equipped with cameras which officials claimed took pictures of military installations. Monday’s crash landing followed an artillery exchange between the countries.

AusTRALiA: A Scottish-born citizen yesterday won a court battle to be recognised as of ‘non-specific sex’. Norrie, 52, had an operation to become a woman in 1989 – but stopped taking hormones after surgery and no longer identifies as male or female. ‘Maybe people will see there are more options than the binary,’ Norrie, of Sydney, said.

isRAEL: It’s the invasion of the Trash People as German artist HA Schult’s sculpture, made out of rubbish, arrives in Tel Aviv PIcture:reuters

World War ii bomb Terror survivor dies kills 7 in scrapyard in killer bee attack

THAiLAnD: A World War II bomb killed seven people and injured 19 when it exploded in a scrapyard. The device detonated as workers used a gas-powered thermal cutter to take it apart. The explosive, likely to have been dropped from a British or US plane, was sold for scrap after being found buried in a building site in northern Bangkok.

Mystery of MH370 be solved, warns

THE fate of flight MH370 may never be known, officials warned yesterday. Police chief Insp Gen Khalid Abu Bakar said the investigation into the disappearance of the Malaysian Airlines plane could ‘go on and on and on’. And he warned that relatives of the 239 people on board could be left in limbo. ‘At the end of the investigations, we may not even know the real cause,’ he said. ‘We may not even know the reason for this incident.’

by sHAROn MARRis MH370 disappeared on March 8 heading to Beijing from Kuala Lumpur after its transponders were switched off and it vanished from commercial radar. Despite weeks of scouring the surrounding seas, eventually focusing on the southern Indian Ocean, nothing has been found to help investigators determine what happened to the aircraft. Malaysian authorities have not ruled out mechanical failure, but

Last British troops to head to Afghanistan

niCARAguA: He survived being kidnapped by terrorists and blown up by a landmine, but Catholic missionary Brother Pepe ran out of luck when he disturbed a bee colony. The 66-year-old Spaniard was stung to death as he prepared for mass after spraying insecticide on a hive. He was unaware it was filled with African bees.

and finally... AMERiCA: He’s un-Belieber-ly cheeky. Musician Paz Dylan got people to buy his new release at shops across LA, after putting it in CD cases for Justin Bieber’s album Believe and smuggling them on to shelves.

Chile quake kills six... with worse tremors to come SIX people have died following an 8.2 magnitude earthquake in Chile. Thousands more were ordered to leave their homes amid fears of a tsunami. President Michelle Bachelet declared a state of emergency along the northern coast. The tremors caused landslides and power cuts. About 300 inmates escaped from a women’s jail in the city of Iquique, 99km (61 miles) from the offshore epicentre of the quake. Only 30 or so have been recaptured by riot police. Seismologists have warned a worse earthquake is yet to come. Mike Simons, from the US Geological Survey, said: ‘It could be tomor-

row or in 50 years. ‘This was not the large earthquake we were expecting for this area.’ Those who died were either crushed to death or suffered a heart attack. The quake – followed by 20 aftershocks – began late on Tuesday. Some voters are wary of Ms Bachelet’s experience in handling earthquakes. She returned to power last month. Weeks before her first stint in power ended in 2010, an earthquake with a magnitude of 8.8 hit the South American country. Her government insisted there was no tsunami risk, but many of the 500 people who died were caught by waves.

Training day: Afghan army soldiers perform counter terrorism exercises THE final deployment of British combat troops to Afghanistan will take place in June, it was announced yesterday. They will form the final phase of military operations in the country with the drawdown of troops due to be complete by the end of the year. Defence secretary Philip Hammond’s announcement came as Task Force Helmand, Britain’s military headquarters in Afghanistan, was disbanded. The British-led coalition force’s functions will now be absorbed into the wider US-led Regional Command (South West). Mr Hammond said about half

Officers die in suicide attack

of the units in the last deployment will come under the command of Brig Robert Thomas. He becomes the senior British officer in the province, serving as deputy commander Regional Command (South West). The remainder will deploy elsewhere within Camp Bastion, and in Kandahar and Kabul, as part of Britain’s contribution. British personnel numbers in Helmand have reduced from a peak of more than 10,000 to just under half that as Afghan forces take the lead in providing security against the Taliban. Some 448 British personnel have died in Afghanistan since 2001.

A SUICIDE bomber killed six police officers in an attack on the heavily fortified interior ministry compound in Kabul. The terrorist, dressed in a military uniform, got through several checkpoints to reach the ministry in the Afghan capital before detonating his explosives. The attack came ahead of this weekend’s presidential election.

say all the evidence suggests the plane was deliberately diverted. Insp Gen Bakar said the inquiry was focusing on the cabin crew and pilots, after clearing all 227 passengers of possible involvement in hijacking, sabotage or having personal or psychological problems that could have contributed to the flight’s disappearance. At least nine ships and nine planes, including a British ship and submarine, are searching a 220,150 sq-km (85,000 sq-mile) area of sea about 1,500km (900 miles) west of


may never police chief Perth, Australia. With no information indicating where the plane went down, spotting wreckage is key to narrowing the search area and finding the plane’s ‘black box’ flight data recorders. The recorders emit a ‘ping’ that can be detected by special equipment in the immediate vicinity. But these are battery-powered and stop transmitting about 30 days after a crash. Retired Air Chief Marshal Angus Houston, the head of the Australian agency coordinating the operation,

said once plane wreckage was found, they would be able to narrow the search focus. ‘We can start to exploit the underwater technology devices that will hopefully lead to where the aircraft is on the bottom of the ocean,’ he said. ‘The reality is it’s the most complex and challenging search and rescue operation, or search and recovery operation now, that I’ve ever seen.’ The transcript released this week of the last exchanges with the pilots showed nothing amiss.

End of ops: Brig James Woodham, right, and US Brig Gen Daniel Yoo stand during a ceremony at Camp Bastion Pictures: ePA

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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

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1 in four S Africa women is HIV positive HIV and AIDS rates in South Africa are on the up, with patients surviving longer and new infections spreading more rapidly than anywhere else in the world. An estimated 12.2 per cent of the population had the virus in 2012, compared with 10.6 per cent in 2008, according to a survey from the Human Sciences Research Council. Prof Leickness Simbayi partly blamed the percentage rise on 400,000 new HIV cases in the year studied, taking the total number of people infected in the country to 6.4million. Worryingly, awareness about transmission and prevention fell 3.5 per cent, to 26.8 per cent. Young black African women were the worst affected – almost 25 per cent of 15- to 49-year-old females were HIV-positive. But, while treatment is increasing, with about 2million patients on an antiretroviral plan, complacency and a lack of education contributed to the rise in new cases. About 75 per cent of the 38,000 people surveyed believed they were at low risk of contracting the virus – even though ten per cent of those tested were found to be already infected. Risky behaviours were also more prevalent, with under50s having more sexual partners but using condoms less. Prof Simbayi called the trend ‘disappointing’.

Ban on Twitter is ruled illegal TURKEY’S Twitter ban violates the right to free expression and must be revoked, the country’s highest court ruled yesterday. The constitutional court wrote to the media regulator demanding access be reinstated, although it was unclear when it would take effect. Prime minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan suspended access last month after users made claims of government corruption – before blocking YouTube after a recording of a secret security meeting was leaked.

Return to power: Ségolène Royal, France’s newly-appointed ecology minister is greeting by outgoing minister Philippe Martin Pictures: reuters

Public anger as Hollande ex lands top cabinet job by NICOLE LE MARIE

A FORMER girlfriend of François Hollande was yesterday handed a senior position in his government. Ségolène Royal, who is the mother of the president’s four children, was appointed ecology minister. It was 22 years to the day since she first entered the cabinet of François Mitterrand. However, before the announcement, a poll in Le Parisien newspaper showed more than 70 per cent of France was against her returning to power as part of newly-installed prime minister Manuel Valls’s reshuffle. Ms Royal shrugged off the criticism, saying she was ‘very honoured’ to be chosen and was well aware of her remit to ‘help the country’s resurgence and the jobs which go with it’. Mr Hollande was forbidden from speaking to Ms Royal while he was

Allies: Mr Hollande with Mr Valls living with first lady, Valerie Trierweiler. The two women were sworn enemies but the president paved the way for Ms Royal’s political return when he left Ms Trierweiler in January after his affair with an actress was exposed. Another of the president’s allies, Dijon mayor François Rebsamen, was elected employment minister as part of France’s ‘government of combat’.

Chelsea fans riot in Paris HUNDREDS of Chelsea football fans went on the rampage in Paris last night, smashing up cafés and shops before the club’s Champions League tie. The worst of the violence was in Rue St Denis, a popular tourist street full of pubs and bars. About 400 supporters could be seen making Nazi salutes and chanting

racist abuse before attacking Paris St Germain fans. ‘It’s terrifying, I just want to get out of here,’ said Sarah Avel, a 16-year-old French student. ‘We could hear the chanting all afternoon but we didn’t expect fighting.’ Police believe 300 hardcore Chelsea hooligans entered the country via Belgium to avoid detection.


14 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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Mailbox

Email: Twitter:

mail@metroherald.ie Text: @metrohnews and Facebook: #metromailbox

‘Mail’ to 53131* Facebook.com/ metroherald

‘I’m bored’ hair dye look just as pathetic on a woman

Z

eus McGrath, I agree with you that men shouldn’t dye their hair – it does look silly – but what if I told you that your hair-dying laws shouldn’t be just confined to males? I find that women who change the colour of their hair ‘because they’re bored’ look just as superficial and pathetic as any man I’ve seen with dye in his locks. To me it always screams that the girl is not confident in herself and is trying to hide from who she is. A woman who rates herself based on the colour of her hair is not an attractive woman in my books and I’m sure other men agree with me. Au natural, Blackrock ■ Average Joe, why would any country want to join that discredited security company that only works for oil companies and big business called the uN? It only helps when there’s a smell of oil in the air, otherwise it sends a

PLASTIC PROMISES: Mauro Pastore sent in this photo of a lampost still encircled with leftover tags from election posters. He says it’s the only tangible evidence of the last election promises. We, sadly, have to agree

■ To the driver of the grey 4x4 traveling at high speed on the Frascati Road towards the city centre at the junction of Temple Road at 5.10pm, on Tuesday evening, deliberately changing lanes at the last minute to drive within inches of me. I had almost crossed the road and your driving forced me to jump onto the kerb to avoid being clipped – I hope you got over your psychotic meltdown behind the wheel, and I pity the person who will no doubt fall foul of your mental instability at some point or other. Concerned Pedestrian

Send your photos to pictures@ metroherald.ie with ‘Quick pic’ as the subject and we will print the best each day in the paper

MJ magic in May ■ Yippee, the new Michael Jackson CD is out May 13! Magic will be back on the radio and the charts hooray so excited! ;) Sarah, Dublin xoxox ■ Anyone else sick and tired of being called ‘luv’ by shop assistants? It is way too overfamiliar. And don’t get me started on the xx at the end of emails or texts. Endearments are for the people I love, not strangers I happen to be doing business with. Bee

● To my Tara Street bf, our bikes are chained together and I wish our hearts were too. You ruffle my feathers and I know our ducklings wouldn’t be ugly. Think of the quack we’d have! x Ducky ● To the girl in the wooly hat yesterday on the 46A into city around noon, want to hang out sometime? Guy in leather jacket

Quick pic

few bodies to watch the fun while thousands of people are killed. Anyway China has a veto over the uN, so Taiwan hasn’t a hope. How’s that for democracy? Paul, Drogheda

■ I think [yesterday’s] Yeh Big Ride section should have been called You’re Alright... J

■ I do love the #YehBigRide section in the @MetroHNews. Some desperate blokes out there. ‘I have been watching you on the Dart’. #Legend. @Martin__Stephen

Water-saving tip: It may look like a plain blue bucket, but Monika, who sent in the photo, said it’s her new ‘shower device’. She collects the water she uses during a shower, and reuses it to flush the toilet. This way she says she saves 8-10 litres of water per day, 3,650litres per year. Thanks Monika, this will be handy when water metering comes in.

*Please include a name and location. Texts cost €0.30 per message + standard network charges. SP. Oxygen8 Communications, 4th Floor, Malt House North, Grand Canal Quay, D2. Customer service number 0818286606

TREnDIng

gOOD On yA ● To the extremely nice delivery man who was in the coffee shop on Clare Street. Thank you so much for the offer to pay for my breakfast on Wednesday, your random act of kindness has inspired me to continue on this act. Happy Sol ● A sincere thanks to the gentleman who went to great lengths to hand in the keys I lost three weeks ago to my local sports centre. I will donate to a charity in your honour. Thanks again. Tony, Santry

RAnDOM AcTs Of kInDnEss @metrohnews #metromailbox

#TCD #Trinity

● Trinity front gates rammed and destroyed this morning. Total madness #TCD

@hargadon11

● ‘There was loud music playing in the car’ – Man (68) arrested after car smashes through TCD gates. @_raiun ● Trinity are taking this rebrand seriously. They’re destroying all history, including the front door.

Yikes. #TCD

@donalmulligan

● Ludicrous speculation that guy who crashed into TCD gate was (ha!) from the future. Yeah, right. NOTHING has changed.

@fustar

● Some people take trying to get into Trinity to new shocking levels...

@AmeliaMcC


Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

15 Hilary WalsH

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Lily Aldridge Can the Victoria’s secret model go from the catwalk to the design studio?


16 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

style

D

editorial@metroherald.ie to advertise, call 01 7055010

Can Lily go from model to designer?

R

ock star wife and lingerie supermodel Lily Aldridge has teamed up with LA fashion brand Velvet for a second time. Her debut range with the casualwear label was met with so much fanfare, she agreed to design another one. Her SS14 collection hits stores this month. ‘When I was pregnant they asked if I wanted to work on a partnership,’ she says. ‘Because I was pregnant, I couldn’t model so I was excited to be able to do something.’ Having fronted Velvet’s look books and campaigns for years, the deal felt natural. ‘I love and trust them,’ she says. ‘They’re like family now so it was a no-brainer to work with them. I’ve loved the whole process. It’s every girl’s dream to design the perfect wardrobe.’ For all that’s said about models moving into design with no real experience, fashion and creativity

BEAuTy LinEs Models and design aren’t always a match made in heaven but just sometimes it works a charm… Kate Moss and Topshop (left) The partnership began in 2007, lasted three years and now it’s back on. Her new collection comes out this month. Gisele Bündchen Gisele was voted the world’s top earning supermodel by Forbes for the seventh year in a row last year. Her empire includes clothing, lingerie, skincare and footwear. Freja Beha Erichsen and Mother The 26-year-old’s capsule

On OuR RADAR Celine Dion’s All For Love is her seventeenth fragrance, but it smells new. A soft pink liquid with a much livelier green freshness, it’s definitely a mature fragrance, in a very classy bottle. However, its lasting power is poor – we found ourselves using a lot to get a good cloud to follow us around. 30ml for €17.95

TOp 5 picks fROM LiLy’s ss14 RAngE

Denim jacket €212

Victoria’s Secret beauty Lily Aldridge reveals the inspiration for her own collection to Naomi Mdudu

are in Aldridge’s blood. Her father designed album covers for The Rolling Stones and Elton John, her brother Miles is a photographer who has shot for the likes of Vogue Italia and Harper’s Bazaar, and both her sisters have modelled for the biggest names in the business. That said, she fell into fashion almost by accident. At 11 years old she was convinced she was going to be a footballer. ‘I played soccer for ten years. My dad is English and played for Arsenal’s junior team and was really into it so I thought that was what I was going to do,’ she says. She was first photographed aged four by legendary lensman Bruce Weber on one of her sister’s

collection for Mother Denim featured faux leather skinny jeans and chambray shirts that tapped into her personal style. Alé by Alessandra Ambrosio The 32-yearold recently announced her fashion and lifestyle brand would launch this spring. Rosie HuntingtonWhiteley and Marks & Spencer The former Victoria’s Secret Angel hooked up with M&S in 2012. Four seasons in, Rosie for Autograph is the retailer’s best-selling lingerie line of all time.

Shirt dress €224 shoots. Aged 16, she was scouted at a school carnival in her native california.Her first big campaign was as the face of Abercrombie & Fitch, shot, again, by Weber. ‘I was so young. I don’t think I actually thought much about it,’ she says. ‘When I became 18 or 19, I moved to New York and everything started happening. It’s a great job so I’m really blessed.’ Blessed is a term that springs to mind when you think of Aldridge. She has the kind of beauty that turns heads and, thanks to her long-standing relationship with Victoria’s Secret, is at the top of her game. Then there’s her marriage to kings of Leon frontman caleb Followill. The couple met in 2007 and married four years later. The band’s 2008 hit Sex on Fire was written about her. Despite her celebrity, Aldridge lives a relatively understated lifestyle with Followill and their oneyear-old daughter Dixie Pearl on a farm in Nashville. When they’re not there they’re split between London, Los Angeles and New York. ‘I’m lucky to live in so many great cities

Paul Costelloe’s Living C Loungewear Loungew has arrived at Dunnes Stores. S This lace trim nightdress, €35, Linen Blend V-Neck Top, €35and Paul Costelloe Living Cable Knit Pump, €25 have caught our fancy Vaseline’s Spray & Go really is pretty innovative – the moisturising cream coats the skin rapidly in an even, fine

so I kind of take my inspiration from girls on the streets,’ she says. Understated sums up her personal style too. ‘Just like my collection, my style is classical,’ she says. ‘I just try to dress however I want during the day and be effortless about it. I wanted the collection to be pieces you can buy and keep forever that will always be cool.’ Her range therefore includes stalwarts such as a Breton, classic white tee and range of easy summer dresses. ‘We wanted to keep it very Velvet and that feeling of easy, effortlessly cool pieces,’ she says. ‘The neon Becky dress is in this beautiful bright yellow colour I’ve been wanting to wear. I think it’s so beautiful and perfect for spring but I couldn’t find it anywhere.’ And this is only the beginning of her design ambitions. She plans to follow the likes of Miranda kerr and former Angel Gisele Bündchen by launching her own lifestyle brand. ‘I would love to keep creating and keep coming up with designs, clothes and beauty products. I love doing it and I love the process of it.’

spray. We tried the cocoa butter variety, which smelled sumptuous, and soaked in quickly, feeling really quenched – but we found the cream – probably through necessity so it can spray – was a little thin and the moisturised feeling didn’t last. €6.15

Stripey tee €94

Romper suit €212

Print jacket €189


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Street Style

Angharad Williams checked out the street style at Forever 21 last Thursday at the NCAD and Metro Herald up-styling event

Hanna carey 18, student, Rathfarnham

Maria Paduano 35, stylist, Italy

Hanna got her jumper from Topshop. Her trousers and jacket are from Abercrombie & Fitch and her shoes are from River Island

Maria got her skirt in Om Diva. Her jacket and shoes are Italian leather, she got her scarf in Berlin and her hat in Barts

Maria Adamantidi 32, English teacher, Greece Maria’s jacket is from Urban Outfitters, her bag from Topshop and her shoes are Converse

Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

chris cannon 20, NCAD student, Donegal

Chris got his jumper, scarf and shoes in River Island. His jeans are from Urban Outfitters and his jacket is from Zara

chloe O’Neill 23, trainee buyer, Lucan

James Kavanagh 24, PR, Churchtown

His Jumper is from Zara, his trousers from Topman and his shoes are from Schuh. His jacket and bag are borrowed

cLObbER bLOggER Metro Life is taking style advice from the people who really know their stuff, with a rotating panel of bloggers giving style tips. This week eek it’s Cillian O’Connor Fred Perry shirt, €66

White on white on white is in For a nation populated mostly by complexions ranging and anoraks from milky to transparent, this news probably isn’t layered the best. In fact, it probably puts the fear of God in over you. And makes you blush. All-over white isn’t whitee Which, really, is no bad thing since you’ll need es tees advisable for those, all the colour you can get to avoid total whiteand vests out while working this trend. and paired like the author, who From the crisp, icy-white minimalist tailoring abo with abovethink they’re risking isking of Jil Sander to Emporio Armani’s supertheit staying ng out in the lightweight sportswear, white took centre-stage for the spring/summer 2014 shows. Chalk it up sun for or longer than to the ubiquity of print in menswear over the past an hour few years or put it all down to fashion’s 90s minimalism revival, that white shines bright (literally, in the case of Jil Sander’s cropped white leather macs) for SS14 is sure. What’s not, though, is whether or not you can pull this whole thing off – so listen up. All-over white isn’t advisable for those, like the knee chino author, who think they’re risking it staying out in the shorts. sun for longer than an hour after slathering on factor Whatever you 50+. It is, however, for the lucky ones who get their tan ng do, start saving from a holiday in Gilbraltar rather than Johnson’s for the dryHoliday Skin. cleaning now. Think white cotton suits, white derby www.maleshoes and accessories for summer mode. weddings or get beach-ready with com white lightweight bomber jackets

Asos derby shoe, €85 Acne blazer, €665

her dress is from Littlewoods Ireland, her jacket from New Look and her belt is vintage. Her shoes are from Penneys

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18 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

D Dv1

Life television

ScReen Talk CriSiS? WhAt CriSiS?

One of the most hotly-anticipated US drama series of the year will air later this month on TV3. Crisis, starring Gillian Anderson and Dermot Mulroney, centres on an ambush on a school bus from an elite private school in Washington DC, with the children of some of the most influential and powerful people in America held to ransom. When the 13-part series aired in America it brought in more than 6.5million viewers, so expect to see another one hot on its heels.

A Sovereign people – the Story of the iriSh revolution RTÉ1, 10.15pm A gripping one-off documenary from Seán Ó Mórdha explores the two decades that followed the death of Charles Stewart Parnell when some of the most important events in Irish history took place. A time of political and social upheaval, it led us into the 1916 Rising and the War of Independence. But how did it all begin? Who were the figures who led us into a charge towards violent nationalism, and how did they manage to unite the country and encourage them to take up arms for the cause? Most importantly, which figures from earlier struggles influenced these future leaders? One who deserves centre stage is Robert Emmet (pictured), whose speech from the dock as he was tried for treason stirred Irish hearts by declaring no man could write his epitaph until Ireland took its place ‘among the nations of the Earth’.

the fAll

In other Gillian Anderson-related news, Séainín Brennan has confirmed she will return for the second season of BBC drama The Fall, resuming her role as the bereaved Liz Tyler, who, after seeing her only child die, turns to Paul Spector (Jamie Dornan) for solace, unaware that he is a serial killer. The aforementioned Anderson also returns for the series set to be filmed over four months in Belfast.

film of the dAy KILL BILL: VOL 1, SkY acTIOn, 11.55pm It may be a giddy hybrid of a homage to every Japanese film Quentin Tarantino has ever seen and a scrapbook of his visit to the Land of the Rising Sun, but this slice and dice action flick starring Uma Thurman as a woman out for revenge on the bloodthirsty gang of assassins she used to belong to is still highly watchable. Divided into two films, this first episode stands out, if only because the larger than life characters stun us with their overwhelmingly slick and ruthless ways, and because it has, for our minds, the best scenes – most notably the ridiculously long showdown in Japan between Thurman and the ‘Crazy 88’ yakuza led by O-Ren Ishii (a brilliant Lucy Liu), though the fact that the entire story wasn’t structured around this as the overall showdown is a bit of a wasted opportunity – as you may see if you watch the decidedly anti-climactic ending to Part II.

the Big BAng theory e4, 8pm It seems that no matter what time of day it is, if you flick through enough channels you will find an episode of The Big Bang Theory, but it’s always one you have already seen. Thankfully then, after an unreasonably long gap, we finally have some new ones, and we are brought back into the fold with gusto here as arch geek Sheldon continues to reel from unwelcome publicity after accidentally discovering a new element. Fearing that, as a physicist who made a breakthrough in chemistry, he will be seen as a freak, he retreats to his room, but penny comes to the reascue, inviting Wil Wheaton around to explain how he too overcame becoming famous for something he was ashamed of – his role in Star Trek: The next Generation.

Some iriSh people With JoKeS BBc4, 10.30pm

JigS & WigS RTÉ1, 8.30pm

Having devoted shows to Liverpudlian and Jewish humour, it’s only right the Beeb head over to our fair isle, where a rich heritage of storytelling has given us some cracking stand-ups over the years. These jokes, though, are told to camera by the general public, which makes them all the more endearing in the end.

The series that takes a look at the surprisingly large world of Irish dancing offers up a heartwarming tale as it follows Belfast’s Lauren Smyth over several months. Well known on the festival dance circuit, her ambition has always been to become the lead in Riverdance. That she finally does it in her home town brings tears to these Irish eyes.

hAil to the Chief

President Higgins’ visit to Britain will be covered by RTÉ1 next week. Starting on Tuesday at 11.40am with live coverage from Windsor, the station will also show a banquet and the President’s address to the UK Houses of Parliament. On Wednesday and Thursday, a special evening of music, spoken word and dance will take place at the Royal Albert Hall, featuring Irish and British artists, before events are wrapped up on Friday with a visit to Coventry.


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books

Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

features@metroherald.ie to advertise, call 01 7055010

China’s bleak Victorian Yiyun Li’s Kinder Than Solitude is a crime drama with few thrills, writes Anthony Cummins

F

or every reader who thinks the phrase ‘literary fiction’ means lyrical prose, complex themes and psychological depth, there’s another who thinks it’s just a euphemism for ‘boring’. A crime story with the drama crushed out, Yiyun Li’s new novel is poised on this dividing line. Beijing-raised Li is an impressive figure. She made the cut when The New Yorker named her as one of its 20 top US writers under 40 in 2010 – she’d never written in English until after she left China in 1996. Her tales of life in modern-day urban China are as bleak as anything you’d find in the grimmest Victorian novels – a period of literary history she admires – the themes of repression and social control fit well with her own. Her new novel crosses from China to the US in a complex time scheme that cuts between the 1980s and the present day. The knotty narrative follows three ex-friends haunted by the mysterious death of a woman named Shaoai, a former student activist they knew in their youth. It begins in Beijing, where businessman Boyang is organising her funeral after a long vegetative illness caused by her poisoning 20 years earlier. Li keeps us guessing as to how and why Shaoai was poisoned. We know Boyang and his old friends ruyu and Moran had something to do with it but even they don’t know the full circumstances. They’re now in the US, avoiding Boyang’s emails about Shaoai’s death; we see Moran nursing an ex-husband through cancer and ruyu as a nanny evading her boss’s earnest questions about Asian tiger mothers.

in the beginning it wasn’t a joke.

We may not like it but there was a certain kind of terrible logic to many things hitler said. For example, Hitler needed soldiers for his army and for that needed young families, so he said let’s build apartments and houses for them. The same holds true today, you need homes, only not for soldiers but for children who will grow up to become workers who pay taxes for pensions. hitler writes long sentences because he thinks that’s how you look intelligent. He explains every detail twice, three times. It’s as if he’s thinking when people read his book they’ll say: ‘I thought Hitler was simple but now I’ve read this book with all these long sentences, I think he’s a genius.’ If I had been his public relations consultant I would have said, don’t do this. It’s a sign of weakness. You’re showing that other people’s opinion is important to you. The hitler in my book is capable of understanding but he wouldn’t change his

TAkE 3 noVELs sEt in China deCoded

by Mai Jia (Allen Lane) A 2002 spy thriller, recently translated to great acclaim, about a codebreaker in the Chinese secret service, based on the pseudonymous author’s own experience of working in state security.

The valleY of amazemenT

by Amy Tan (Fourth Estate) Historical romp from the US-born author of 1989 bestseller The Joy Luck Club, following half American, half Chinese courtesan ViVi in Shanghai at the end of the 19th century.

The darK road Kinder Than SoliTude by Yiyun li Fourth Estate HHIII We wonder if the poisoning had something to do with Shaoai’s involvement in the Tiananmen Square protest of 1989 or if it was because she molested ruyu, an orphan adopted by Shaoai’s parents. Li has said that she read crime fiction while she composed the novel but her structure

makes it difficult to resolve the mystery with much sense of drama. Soulless encounters with lovers and employers chiefly offer Li an opportunity to critique yuppies in China or well-meaning liberals in the US – the sort of figure already caricatured to death in other work from Li’s 20 under-40 generation of migrant writers. The narration is awash in deep-sounding but empty declarations or idle rhetorical questions. Novels that take a risk with plot often provide compensation in the form of beautiful prose. But on this score, too, Kinder Than Solitude offers little to relish.

i brought the Führer back to life I found a British version of Hitler’s Second Book, the unpublished follow-up to Mein Kampf, on holiday. I read it and thought if this is the second one, I could write the third one.

19

Timur Vermes’ debut novel, Look Who’s Back, is a satire written from the point of view of adolf hitler after he ‘reawakens’ in present-day Germany

by Ma Jian (Chatto & Windus) Pregnant Meili flees her village with her daughter and husband to escape family planning officers in this unflinching protest novel about the effects of the onechild-per-family policy from a dissident writer banned in China. AC

READing nOTEs saLLY GrEEn

point of view. He thinks that by the age of 30 he has learnt everything.

This hitler explains that he’ll do everything again, every single act. The reader knows what this man is going to do because he’s already done it before. But all the characters he meets think it’s an act. They think it’s a very tasteless or aggressive form of satire. as a German, you were more likely to have been on the side of the nazis than a victim. You didn’t have to work in a concentration camp, it might just have been a matter of moving into an apartment that had been owned by Jews. Germany and the German people were involved in these crimes because it was easy to commit to them. Germany’s changed. It hasn’t always been oK to satirise Hitler. once, the question would have been, how can you do this? The question now, is why not? There are similarities between Putin and hitler. Putin is ready to act with violence. If you are ready to do so, you have to ask: Can I do it? And how? Hitler used aggression when he saw there wouldn’t be much resistance. Putin knows the West won’t risk casualties to Ben Felsenburg stop him.

It’s high season again for young adult fantasy – Sally Green’s debut Half Bad, set in a world of white and black witches, is topping the Amazon kids’ bestseller list and is high on the adult list too. Forty-five swift foreign-rights have already been sold,earning this debut author a Guinness World Record. Green will be in Dublin tonight to discuss, read from and sign copies of her work. Tonight, Easons, O’Connell Street D1, 6pm. www.penguin.ie


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puzzles

METROSCOPE

by Patrick Arundell

NEMI by Lise

Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20

As pressure seems to mount, you may be wondering about a course of action. A Sun/Pluto link hints it may be decision time, particularly if you want to nurture your wildest dreams and still maintain a secure lifestyle. It might be a balancing act. For your forecast, call 15609 114 70

Taurus Apr 21 – May 21

Perhaps you and another are locked in a battle, in which it’s hard to make headway. However, a fresh perspective may be needed if you’re determined to fight on. Today’s lineup highlights lively intuitive impulses. Be open to this and prepared to run with it.

METROKU Easy, Moderate and Challenging. For solutions, visit Metro.co.uk/metroku

For your forecast, call 15609 114 71

Gemini May 22 – Jun 21

The desire to make sound progress may be matched by today’s Mercury/ Saturn connection, encouraging commitment to a plan or goal. If indecisiveness has been a problem, this can be a time to knuckle down.

For your forecast, call 15609 114 72

Cancer Jun 22 – Jul 23

Should you put your needs first, or those of others? There are no easy answers, but while a compromise may be possible, it’s unlikely to be the best solution. Today’s Sun/Pluto link hints that a discussion might be in order as a way to get things moving. For your forecast, call 15609 114 73

Leo Jul 24 – Aug 23

If you feel bogged down in a situation with little chance of escape, then today’s line-up might bring relief. A limited number of choices suggest you could feel bamboozled. Yet, it’s possible you have more wiggle room than you realise.

PEARLs BEFORE swINE

For your forecast, call 15609 114 74

Virgo Aug 24 – Sep 23

An upbeat Mercury/Saturn tie-up allows for practical exchanges that can decide a course of action, or that might help stimulate brainstorming or feedback sessions. If you need to make a move, then a fruitful conversation might help. For your forecast, call 15609 114 75

ACROSS 7 Illustrious (5) 8 Raging (7) 9 Compel (7) 10 Remove faults (5) 12 Communicable (10) 15 Unlikely (10) 18 Decree (5) 19 Limit (7) 21 Quake (7) 22 Suffering (5)

DOWN 1 Not precise (10) 2 Astern (5) 3 Prophet (4) 4 Feeble (6) 5 Eastern (8) 6 Ennui (7) 11 Confused (10) 13 Mid-day (8) 14 Best (7) 16 Harmony (6) 17 Inflexible (5) 20 Remark (4)

Yesterday’s Solutions Across: 1 Practical; 8 Own; 9 Depredation; 11 Breathe; 12 Upper; 13 Animal; 15 Rescue; 17 Idiot; 18 Affront; 20 Assiduously; 22 Dot; 23 Stratagem. Down: 2 Roe; 3 Treat; 4 Craven; 5 Leisure; 6 Conspicuous; 7 Interment; 10 Precipitate; 11 Beatitude; 14 Attests; 16 Wander; 19 Float; 21 Lie.

scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 22

Get ready for some dedicated action, as a T-Square encourages dynamic change. Perhaps you’ll want to consider lifestyle options that enhance energy and outlook. Yet a spontaneous approach that helps you sidestep any resistance might be best. For your forecast, call 15609 114 77

sagittarius Nov 23 – Dec 21

Potent energies spotlight a romantic relationship, or an invite that could prove fun. However, try to balance an impulsive approach with a little consideration. A brave outlook might be a boon. For your forecast, call 15609 114 78

Capricorn Dec 22 – Jan 20

Disagreements might be possible if you can’t decide on a plan. While today’s Sun/Pluto tie-up might force the pace, perhaps this isn’t a bad thing. And though you might feel powerless, you may have more options than it seems. For your forecast, call 15609 114 79

Aquarius Jan 21 – Feb 19

It’s possible that unexpected developments could derail your plans. A flexible approach might be best at a time when unsought opportunities could change the plan in a positive way. Give yourself wiggle room. For your forecast, call 15609 114 80

Pisces Feb 20 – Mar 20

Your values may conflict with those of others in your life, which could leave you feeling vulnerable. In this instance, don’t even think of watering them down to suit others’ needs and tastes, as you could end up feeling like a square peg in a round hole. For your forecast, call 15609 114 81

For a live one-to-one consultation with one of my gifted psychics, call 15809 113 68 or 1800 719 688 to book using credit card Astrology calls cost 1.27 euros per min from a BT landline. Live Services cost 2.40 euros per minute. Calls from mobiles/other networks may cost more. Callers must be 18 or over to use this service and have the bill payers permission. For entertainment purposes only. All calls are recorded. PhonePayPlus regulated(ComReg in ROI) UK SP: StreamLive Ltd, NR7 0HR, 08700 234 567. ROI SP:Moveda, 1 Courtyard Business Park, Orchard Lane, Blackrock, Co Dublin, 0818 241 398

QuIz

Crossword No. 947 See next edition for solutions

For your forecast, call 15609 114 76

ENIGMA Everybody has a pair. A crutch will sometimes nestle there. Some are hairy, some are bald. (The axilla is what it’s called.) WHO AM I? A night club owner, I was born in Sheffield in 1940. My autobiography is entitled King Of Clubs. I welcomed my third child last year, aged 72.

WHO, WHAT, WHERE & WHEN? WHO… wrote an autobiography entitled The Fairy Tale Of My Life? WHAT... type of creature is the blackcap? WHERE... is the sixth century monastic site of Clonmacnoise? WHEN... was the Good Friday Agreement signed in Ireland?

QUIZ ANSWERS: ENIGMA: Armpit. WHO AM I? Peter Stringfellow. WHO, WHAT, WHERE & WHEN? Hans Christian Andersen; A bird; Shannonbridge, Co Offaly; 1998.

QUICK CROsswORd

Libra Sep 24 – Oct 23

A problem with someone could come to a head. The pressure to take action might seem intense, yet doing so could bring relief. Though a key decision seems a bit of a stretch, taking it might leave you empowered.

SCRIBBLE BOX

20 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014


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gaa

Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD

David Byrne of Dublin chases down Meath’s Bryan McMahon

picture: inpho

formula one

Lewis enjoying benefits of being older and wiser by ADAM HAy-nicHOLLs Lewis HamiLton believes he is far better equipped to deal with this year’s world-title challenge than in previous seasons. Hamilton sealed a lights-toflag victory in malaysia on sunday, spearheading mercedes’ first one-two for 59 years. the 29-year-old enjoyed a faultless weekend in sepang to banish memories of the seasonopener in australia which was hit by technical issues and saw the Briton retire after two laps. although it is still early days in the title race, Hamilton can already sense an improvement in his feel for the car and his own mindset, allied to his growing experience and maturity. ‘Last year i was very unhappy in that i was uncomfortable in

golf

Dubs claim U21 crown a BaRRaGe of points either side of half-time was the key to Dublin beating Meath 0-15 to 0-10 to win the Leinster Under-21 football title in Portlaoise last night. Leading by a single point after 25 minutes, thanks mainly to a missed penalty and seven wides from Meath, Dublin outscored the Royals seven-one in the five minutes either side of the break to pull clear. Cormac Costello led the way for Dublin with five points.

Big gap: Rosberg

‘I’ve nothing on my mind but winning’ the car,’ he said. ‘i knew i would be more comfortable this year because i’ve been with the team

and they know what i like. it’s given me confidence. ‘on sunday the car was fantastic. i feel like i got every bit i needed from it. ‘Personally, i’ve nothing on my mind, nothing other than the championship and winning. ‘i’m also more mature, so all the experiences i’ve had are adding up. ‘i’m starting to see the benefits of the mistakes of things i’ve said or done.’ Hamilton finished 17 seconds clear of team-mate nico Rosberg on sunday. the former mcLaren man added: ‘it [the gap to Rosberg] was massive. ‘i don’t remember the last time in my career i had a gap like that, particularly to my team-mate in the same car.’

Things are looking up: Hamilton in Malaysia picture: epA

21

Houston calling: McIlroy

rory hoping to perfect his Augusta prep RoRy McIlRoy will hope he has finally found the secret to successful Masters preparation as he competes in this week’s Shell Houston open. McIlroy has yet to record a topten finish in five appearances at Augusta National, his ‘best’ result being joint-15th in 2011 when he led by four shots going into the final round, only to collapse to a closing 80. on that occasion, the 24-year-old did not play for three weeks before the year’s first major, an approach he repeated in 2012 in the belief he usually performed well when fresh. But a finish of 40th at Augusta prompted a rethink, with the Northern Irishman playing in Houston before last year’s Masters. one good omen for the former world No.1 could be that the last four majors that Tiger Woods missed through injury were all won by Irish golfers. McIlroy won the 2011 US open and Darren Clarke took the open Championship a month later, while in 2008 Padraig Harrington won both the open and US PGA Championship. However, Harrington has yet to qualify for the Masters and has to win in Houston to avoid missing the trip to Augusta for the first time since 2009. The 42-year-old Dubliner is 189th in the FedEx Cup standings after making just three cuts in seven starts this season.

spORT DigEsT

No Woods won’t Cink Masters 10 Victories at

Walsh stands by for AP’s Grand call

gOLf Stewart Cink is adamant

RAcing Tony McCoy is set to

the Masters won’t suffer because of Tiger Woods’ absence. The world No.1 announced on Tuesday he would miss the first major of the year for the first time in his career after having surgery on a pinched nerve in his back. Former Open champion Cink says Woods (pictured) will be missed but that the Augusta showpiece, which starts a week today, will still be something special. ‘It will be a bit different but it’s still a great tournament,’ he said. ‘We played, back in 2008, a lot of majors

without him and they were still great tournaments, and the Masters will be great. But it’s kind of sad not to see Tiger over there because it’s always exciting to see what he’s going to do.’

home for Toulon in the Heineken Cup, an unbeaten streak in the competition that has seen them average 38 points at Stade Felix Mayol. Leinster will be hoping to snap that streak in Sunday’s quarter-final

250th Grand

prix of Jenson Button’s career in Bahrain this weekend.

decide today which horse to ride in Saturday’s Grand National, with Mark Walsh standing by to partner Colbert Station if he picks Double Seven. McCoy has admitted to having a slight preference for Double Seven, trained by Martin Brassil. Both horses are owned by JP McManus. McCoy was unseated by Colbert Station at The Chair in last year’s National, which may well be a factor in him choosing to ride another horse this time round. It is expected the 39-year-

old will make his decision just before the official field is declared this morning. Trainer Ted Walsh said: ‘He (Colbert Station) is all ready to go. I haven’t spoken to Tony about what he’s riding, though. I don’t expect to speak to him until I see him at the races on Thursday and he’ll have made his decision by then. If he picks Double Seven then Mark will be riding ours. I’ve no problem with that at all. Mark rides most of JP’s horses when Tony isn’t in Ireland anyway.’


22 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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football champions league

Pastore’s late strike leaves Jose on ropes REsuLTs

quARTER-finAL, 1sT LEg PSG ......................................3 chelSeA ..............................1

uefa champions league quarter-finals, first leg psg ...................... 3 chelsea ............... 1 real madrid......... 3 B Dortmund....... 0

by nick METcALfE

scottish premiership hearts .................. 1 aberdeen ........... 1

CHELSEA face an uphill task to reach their seventh Champions League semi-final in 11 seasons after suffering a late blow and damaging defeat in Paris. Paris Saint-Germain were the better team for much of the encounter but the tie was on a knife-edge until Javier Pastore fired home a priceless third goal for the hosts in stoppage time. PSG started like an express train last night and went ahead after just four minutes. John Terry, days after his own-goal sent Chelsea to league defeat at Crystal Palace, headed straight into the path of Ezequiel Lavezzi, who fired home into the roof of the net. Mourinho’s men were level after 27

1 european trophy won in their history by psg – the cup Winners’ cup in 1996 3 minutes into real

madrid’s champions league tie with Borussia Dortmund when gareth Bale (above) gave the spanish side the lead. further goals from isco and cristiano ronaldo sealed a 3-0 win for the hosts. for ronaldo, it was a record-equalling 14th champions league goal of the season.

late late show: Javier pastore is mobbed by team-mates as he scores in the tie between psg and chelsea

PIcTURe: PA

minutes, with Thiago Silva lunging into a careless challenge on Oscar to give away a penalty, and Eden Hazard calmly sending Salvatore Sirigu the wrong way from the penalty spot. The Blues nearly went in front just before half-time, when Hazard struck a superb volley from a Willian cross, which bounced back off a post. The hosts scored their second goal just after the hour when Lavezzi’s fine free-kick left the Chelsea defence and goalkeeper Petr Cech wanting, and David Luiz could only divert the ball into his own net. Zlatan Ibrahimovic, who by his own high standards had a quiet night, went off injured, and it looked like the scoring was over until substitute Pastore evaded a couple of defenders and fired home inside Cech’s near post.

fOOTbALL DigEsT Forest return is on for Pearce after U-turn

STUART PeARce admits he is set to return to old club Nottingham Forest as manager. The former england21 chief turned down the job for ‘personal reasons’ last week but has changed his mind after being offered a two-year contract by chairman

Fawaz Al-hasawi. Forest have agreed to wait until the summer for their No.1 target, meaning Gary Brazil will remain in caretaker charge for the rest of this season. Asked if he will take over next season Pearce (pictured) said: ‘It’s very likely.’

THEy sAiD iT ‘he’s such a quick healer and a young man so we hope he’s going to recover for the [arsenal] game on sunday.’ Everton boss Roberto Martinez is optimistic Ross Barkley will overcome a calf injury to play at the weekend

Berahino ‘could sue Morrison’ SAIDO BeRAhINO is said to be considering legal action against his West Brom team-mate James Morrison after allegedly being punched in a dressing-room bust-up following Saturday’s 3-3 draw with cardiff city.

According to the BBc, the england Under-21 player is unhappy with how the situation was handled. West Brom have played down the row and will take no disciplinary action against any of the players involved.


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Thursday, April 3, 2014 METRO HERALD 23

Ground move ‘critical’ for Spurs, claims chairman

Expectations: Levy

TOTTENHAM believe it is perfectly ‘feasible’ they could move into a new stadium by 2017. The new 58,000capacity ground will be next to their current White Hart Lane home. And Spurs chairman Daniel Levy believes the move is ‘critical’ for the future of the London club. ‘We have the smallest capacity stadium of any club in the top 20 clubs in Europe, let alone the current top four Premier League clubs,’ he said. ‘We cannot stress strongly enough

premier league how critical the new stadium is over the long term to these raised expectations.’ Levy has also suggested while major changes are planned off the field, there will not be another ‘summer of major upheaval’. Gareth Bale departed for Real Madrid last summer but a host of players came in, leading to a sense of excitement before the season.

That has largely fallen flat, with few of the new arrivals making an impression, and Spurs looking like they will not make the top four in the Premier League, or win a trophy. Tim Sherwood replaced Andre Villas-Boas as manager earlier this season, with speculation Louis van Gaal will take over in the summer. Levy said: ‘Whilst this season’s performances and results have not lived up to expectation, we believe our squad has potential.’

football champions league

5

KEy pOiNTS TO bARcELONA’S TRANSfER bAN

The Spanish giants were punished by fifa yesterday 1) What’s happened?

Barca have been banned (pending appeal) from signing players in the summer of this year and the January 2015 transfer window.

2) Why?

Robben can’t handle Moyes’ safe approach

According to Fifa regulations on the status and transfer of players, ‘international transfers are only permitted if the player is over the age of 18 – unless there are special conditions. Barcelona have been found to be in breach of this rule in the case of ten minor players’.

by MATTHEW NASH

Arjen robben labelled Manchester United’s tactics at old Trafford as being just ‘like handball’. United had only 26 per cent possession in the first leg of their Champions League quarter-final against bayern Munich but created the better chances in a 1-1 draw to go into next week’s decider level with the reigning champions. Holland winger robben described the approach of David Moyes’ men as being ‘more like handball’, the olympic sport popular in Germany where teams pack their defence and look to counter-attack.

3) What could it mean for barca’s squad?

With Carles Puyol retiring, they’ll be short of a centre-half and may want to beg soon-to-be-out-ofcontract Victor Valdes (pictured) to stay – although the keeper has a serious knee injury.

4) Any done deals?

Barca have reportedly lined up summer moves for Borussia Monchengladbach keeper Marc-Andre ter stegen and Croatian wonderkid Alen Halilovic. Whether they now get put on hold is unclear.

‘They just played on the counter – it was handball’ He said: ‘It was not easy, as Man United played very defensively and didn’t leave any gaps. ‘We wanted to play football but they tried to stop us, just playing on the counter-attack, it was almost like handball. ‘Away goals are very important and that’s why we are satisfied having come back from 1-0 down, so we’ll take the result back home and hopefully finish it [the tie] off next week.’ robben added: ‘I did not really like the atmosphere before the game because everyone was saying “you are going to win it, it’s going to be easy”. ‘no – you play at old Trafford against Manchester United who are a top team and top players and the Champions League is some-

5) Any knock-on effects for English clubs?

Liverpool might be annoyed – Barca have also been banned from selling and Brendan Rodgers is a big fan of the Catalan giants’ B team.

6) but they could still get off, couldn’t they?

Rattled: Robben runs at United defender Rio Ferdinand at Old Trafford on Tuesday night thing different. It’s not like the [German] league. ‘We will have to bring in another top performance to beat them and it is going to be very difficult.’ United midfielder Michael

Carrick, meanwhile, was left to rue Danny Welbeck’s missed chance which could have seen them take a lead to Munich next Wednesday. Welbeck tried to chip Manuel neuer, who made a

routine save, and Carrick said: ‘That is the one that sticks out. ‘It would have been great if it had gone in but as it happened we managed to go 1-0 up anyway. Who knows what

PICTURE: REUTERs

would have happened? It was a chance he’d normally take. ‘We are not getting carried away, the task ahead of us is tough. We will have to be at our best to get the right result. but we still have a chance.’

Barca can appeal. In the only comparative case Chelsea were hit with a two-window ban for the Gael Kakuta affair in 2009. The Blues appealed and ended up paying compensation to Lens rather than serving a ban. But with Barca guilty of multiple infractions rather than just one, cutting a deal may prove trickier. Even so, an appeal to the Court of Arbitation for sport could delay the ban and allow them to restock their squad this summer. by Gavin Brown


SPORT

24 METRO HERALD Thursday, April 3, 2014

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Robben frustrated by United’s handy defensive set-up Helpless: Mourinho can only look on as Chelsea lose, while the own goal from Luiz (inset) was crucial

Picture: Pa

Jose’s hit by a Luiz cannon

«sEE pAGE 23

Own-goal calamity helps PSG take firm grip on tie DaVID lUIZ’S minute of madness and a crucial injury-time strike left chelsea’s champions league hopes hanging by a thread after a dramatic night in Paris. eden Hazard’s penalty had cancelled out ezequiel lavezzi’s early opener to leave the teams level at the break. But luiz clumsily gave away a freekick on the hour mark and turned the resulting set-piece into his own net. The Brazilian’s lapse was compounded by Javier Pastore’s last-gasp strike that sees Paris St-Germain take a 3-1

by DANIEL JONES first-leg lead to london next week. Jose Mourinho’s men will still believe they can overturn the deficit at Stamford Bridge, and may have the bonus of facing a PSG team without key man Zlatan Ibrahimovic. The Swedish striker limped off in the second half at Parc des Princes and must now be a doubt for the return leg of the quarter-final next Tuesday.

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REpORT – pAGE 22

Young: Suspensions give us a chance Barcelona ready to ASHLEY YOUNG claims Bayern Munich will miss suspended stars Bastian Schweinsteiger and Javi Martinez in the second leg of their Champions League quarter-final. United drew 1-1 with the holders at Old Trafford on Tuesday but Bayern will have goalscorer Schweinsteiger missing for next week’s return match after he was sent off after receiving a second yellow card for a foul on Wayne Rooney. Martinez will also be missing after his latest booking earned a ban. ‘Schweinsteiger is going to be a miss for them. Martinez will be as well. But we have to concentrate on ourselves and put on a perform-

Kroos controlled over Red link BAYERN midfielder Toni Kroos has played down links with a move to United even though the Germany international has failed to agree a new contract. ‘It [Old Trafford] is a beautiful stadium. But I belong to Bayern Munich ance,’ Young said. ‘I can’t wait to go to Munich. ‘Everyone would have taken that result before a ball was kicked. We have given ourselves a massive

and that’s good,’ Kroos (left) told TZ newspaper. Bayern chairman KarlHeinz Rummenigge had already insisted this week: ‘He will certainly play at Bayern next year. What’s beyond that, I don’t know.’

chance. It sets us up nicely for the second leg. It was a great team performance and we look forward to the second leg now.’

fight transfer ban Barcelona have confirmed they will appeal to overturn a two-window ban from the transfer market after the punishment was meted out by Fifa. The Spanish giants were found guilty by football’s governing body of repeatedly breaching transfer regulations in signing youth players. Fifa also fined the catalan club €370,000 but Barca are not taking the punishment lying down. They said in a statement last night: ‘FcB will present the corresponding appeal to Fifa and if necessary

will submit the resulting resolution to the court of arbitration for Sport (caS).’ It added that ‘appropriate precautionary measures’ would be taken to preserve the rights of the club and ensure they were not kept out of the transfer market. chelsea were hit with a one-year transfer ban in 2009 for their signing of Gael Kakuta two years previously but a successful appeal saw them pay £750,000 compensation to the youngster’s previous club lille.

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