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iBelong
Miami country day middle school
By inspiring students to find connections where they otherwise might not, we will minimize bullying and increase inclusivity.
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” - Winston ChurchilL iBelong in the Miami Country Day
atmosphere of understanding and
One participant, a middle school
Middle School was founded in 2013
inclusivity that will translate into an
student, said of iBelong, “I think
after an exhaustive study of campus
overall better educational experience
iBelong helps me because whenever I
diversity. As an independent pk-12
for all of our students.
get bullied or excluded I go to iBelong
school, the administration understands the value of diversity and the challenges inherent in achieving it. Attracting a diverse student body is only a small piece; the campus community understands the need to create a campus culture that embraces diverse
iBelong is not a club. A club, by
and feel welcomed.”
definition, is exclusive. You are either
Another said he appreciated the
in the club, or you’re not. This is
discussions, since they helped establish
antithetical to mission of iBelong,
similarities and commonalities. This
which is shared by administration,
young man left an iBelong session
faculty and parents.
feeling like he had connected with
students and parents and helps them
Steve Mathes, director of the middle
assimilate into campus life. By focusing
school, has described iBelong as a
on dialogue, iBelong hopes to create an
“mindset.”
MISSION STATEMENT: It is the mission of iBelong to inspire members of the community to look out for one another. Through effective communication, students will understand each other better and nurture the value of empathy, in the hopes of creating an inclusive community and improving the Miami Country Day School experience for everyone.
people who he never had before.
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iBelong
THE BASICS: COFFEEHOUSES: The coffeehouse being a symbol of open discourse and freethinking, once a month, we invite students to participate in an iBelong activity during lunch. The administration provides hot chocolate, and we engage the students in vigorous discussions on all types of topics. The goal is to mix students from different grades, cliques, races, economic backgrounds, and religions and have them engage each other in ways they typically would not.
MOVIES: We have shown the films Invictus and Promises, both of which have dialogue as their main themes. We invite children and parents to the film in the evening and offer popcorn and refreshments. After the film, we have a dialogue with the attendees.
SUPPORT With support from faculty and administration, students recognize more and more that the adults on campus care about their unique experiences at Miami Country Day School. Classrooms and offices around campus should always be safe places where students can come to adults with complete confidence that their concerns will be heard, and that they will receive empathy, comfort and guidance. Through iBelong the trust between students and adults will continue to build.
What does inclusivity look like? Diversity is nice.
is not the end result of our efforts.
It is nice to see that we have 32% of
Through a campus-wide audit, it was
this and 23% of that and 12% of this
revealed that though MCDS has made
and 17% of that.
great strides in diversity, we have a lot
At MCDS we are committed to an ideology of “Every student, every day,” and with that in mind we must
of work to do toward providing “every student, every day” the academic and social experiences they deserve.
never look at our students as a
We must look beyond the numbers.
number.
Through iBelong, we aim to create a
Diversity is nice. It is nice to step into a classroom or attend a campus event – a football game, a drama production – and see faces of all colors and ethnic backgrounds. With those different backgrounds come rich histories, experiences and perspectives. Diversity is nice. It is not, however, the goal. It is the canvas on which we paint the educational lives of our students. Diversity is the medium. It
culture that nurtures intellectual AND emotional security. We hope to welcome those diverse families into the MCDS community and provide them the resources they need to feel entirely at home. We hope to develop trust amongst students, parents and faculty so that no child is ever left behind. Diversity is nice. Inclusivity is better. Continued on next page
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Continued from previous page Recently, a minority middle school student revealed that she was terribly offended by some behavior on the 8th grade civil rights trip. We asked her if she had talked to her roommates about what had happened, and her response was, “No. I didn’t think they’d
classmates will affect her ability and desire to fully embrace all that MCDS has to offer. We can not accept that a single student feels separate or misunderstood – for whatever reason. It means that we must commit ourselves to a Herculean effort of creating a truly inclusive community.
understand.”
So what does inclusivity look like?
This kind of language from a student is
To me, it looks like a young, mature,
heartbreaking. Beyond empathizing
well-adjusted minority student feeling
with this young lady, we must also
comfortable enough with her
recognize that this distrust of her
classmates to engage in a dialogue
A Story of Bullying John and Kelly Halligan lost their thirteen-year-old son, Ryan, to suicide on October 7, 2003. At the time of his death, Ryan was a student at a middle school in Essex Junction, Vermont. After Ryan’s death, it was revealed that he was ridiculed and humiliated by peers at school and on-line. Ryan’s father writes: “A few days after his funeral I logged on to his AOL IM account because that was the one place he spent most of his time during the last few months. I logged on to see if there were any clues to his final action. It was in that safe world of being somewhat anonymous that several of his classmates told me of the bullying and cyber bullying that took place during the months that led up to his suicide. The boy that had bullied him since 5th grade and briefly befriended Ryan after the brawl was the main culprit. My son, the comedian, told his new friend something embarrassing and funny that happened once, and the friend (bully) ran with the new information that Ryan had something done to him and therefore Ryan must be gay. The rumor and taunting continued beyond that school day … well into the night and during the summer of 2003.”
Inside Out Week What is really going on inside a middle school child’s brain? This was the central premise of the Disney-Pixar film Inside Out, and the inspiration for a week of emotional exploration for our students. In the film, 12-year-old Riley is living a seemingly perfect existence in Minnesota, until her family unexpectedly moves her to San Francisco. The change puts Riley through a roller coast of emotions, unrecognizable to both her and to the people who love her. In the film, these emotions are depicted as characters interacting inside Riley’s brain, or the control center as it’s referred to in the film. The film presents a relatable and sophisticated depiction of the complex and sometimes uncertain mind of a middle school child. The movie provides a perfect prompt to encourage students to explore their emotions, and to that end MCDS will hold its first Inside Out Week. In addition to screening the film, we will incorporate ideas from the film into coursework and engage the students in fun and stimulating activities outside the classroom.
iBelong
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If I can stop one heart from breaking Emily Dickinson If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain; If I can ease one life the aching, Or cool one the pain, Or help one fainting robin Unto his nest again, I shall not live in vain.
Logo by Middle Schooler Becky Bibas