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Rematch? remember when...
5 4 9 1 10 Greatest Boxing Matches of All Time Page 4
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Floyd Mayweather vs. Manny Pacquiao 2015: Will There Be A Rematch? By Anthony Riccobono Floyd Mayweather and Manny Pacquiao are finally set to meet in the ring after negotiating on and off for more than five years, but there’s no guarantee the May 2 bout will be the only fight between boxing’s top stars. As the most profitable match in the sport’s history gets closer, there is speculation that a rematch could be in the future. Three months before the two sides agreed to make the fight official, Pacquiao trainer Freddie Roach said, from his understanding, Mayweather was insisting on getting a rematch, in the case that Pacquiao would be declared the winner. While the contract doesn’t contain a rematch clause, Mayweather-Pacquiao II would make a lot of sense for multiple reasons. “I know he’s [Mayweather] gonna start quick and we’re gonna start quick also. I think the fans will demand a rematch, and I would love a rematch because I like making money, so it’s pretty good,”
Publisher: Richard T. Matz Customer Service Manager: Carol Williams Advertising Manager: Valerie Swaine Account Representative: Michelle Hull Public Relations: Lisa Matz Production / Web: Sandra Powers, Joe Yang Distribution: Dennis Wink Contributing Writers: Doug Aguillard, Art Garcia, Howard Hian, Keith Angelin, Jeri Jacquin (The Movie Maven), Heather E. Siegel, Carlos Kremer
Roach told Jenna J of On The Ropes Boxing Radio. The fight is set to break all kinds of revenue records. It’s expected to gross more than $400 million and sell close to 3 million pay-per-view buys. There are varying reports on how much money the boxers will make, but estimates have Mayweather earning between $120 million and $180 million, while Pacquiao could pull down somewhere between $80 million and $120 million. Even if the rematch were to draw substantially less money than the first fight, it could still make both Mayweather and Pacquiao far more money than they’ve ever gotten for any other bout. In a recent interview with David Mayo of mlive.com, Pacquiao promoter and Top Rank CEO Bob Arum said that he doesn’t know if Mayweather and Pacquiao will decide to have a rematch. However, Arum has previously indicated that there’s a good chance the world will get to see the best fighters of this generation square off again. Mayweather-Pac-
quiao II could also happen regardless of who’s named the winner on May 2. Even if Mayweather keeps his perfect record, a good fight by Pacquiao might increase fans’ interest in the rivalry, making for another enormous payday for the two boxers. After Marcos Maidana lost to Mayweather last year in a fight that was closer than many had expected, Mayweather granted his opponent a rematch, doing so for just the second time in his career. Any decision that doesn’t go in Mayweather’s favor would seemingly increase the likelihood of a rematch. Having never lost in 47 fights, the undefeated boxer could look for redemption in the result of a loss. It would only make sense for the fighters to meet again if they were to have a draw, considering the amount of hype that surrounds the May 2 fight. Pacquiao’s last draw came against Juan Manuel Marquez in May 2004, though their rematch didn’t come for another four years. Both Mayweather and Pacquiao will fight again REMATCH, cont’d. on Page 17
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greatest boxing matches of all time By Jerimy Grafen TheRichest.com Few things are as thrilling as witnessing two evenly-matched combatants battle it out for twelve rounds in the ring. Every so often the planets will align and two men will deliver a fight for the ages. It’s terrifying and exhilarating all at the same time. Here are ten of the best bouts to have ever have taken place in the history of boxing.
Muhammad Ali vs. Joe Frazier III — October 1, 1975
Ali and Frazier split the first two matches against each other and the well-deserved anticipation surrounding
this bout was as huge as any fight had ever been. They dubbed it the, “Thrilla in Manila,” and it would live on to become the greatest fight of all time. After it was over Ali, the winner, said it was as close to death as he’d ever been. He said he couldn’t go on any longer, but that Frazier had just given up before him. He was so beat he asked his corner to cut his gloves off. As this one progressed everyone assumed it would go the duration and end in a decision after 15 rounds. Frazier and Ali beat the hell out of each other for the entirety of the fight. There was no more mystery between these two and it was a true war. Even in the 14th round, after Frazier’s corner had thrown in the towel, Frazier was heard to say, “I want
JEWELRY
Micky Ward vs. Arturo Gatti
him, boss.” Ali would go on to win the fight, but many wonder what would have happened had Frazier’s trainers let the fight go on.
Sugar Ray Leonard vs. Tommy Hearns — September 16, 1981
Billed as, “The Showdown,” this fight would unify the WBC and WBA welterweight titles and it lived up to all the pre-match hype surrounding it. Hearns was undefeated heading into the match and as they began the two fighters would trade punches for the 12 long, intense rounds. While there was
Julio Cesar Chavez (R) vs. Melrick Taylor
won the fight on a decision after ten rounds of intense punishment. The deciding blow was likely landed in the 9th, when Ward dropped Gatti with a left-hook to his ribs. In fact, the 9th round of this fight was truly spectacular – and may be one of the single best rounds of boxing ever recorder. Numerous media outlets dubbed this the “fight of the century.” Gatti would go on to win the next two bouts, but this win by Ward was the one to remember.
Marvin Hagler vs. Tommy Hearns — April 15, 1985
They called it “the war.” It would only last eight minutes. By the end, Hagler would leave bloody, but victorious. In what many believe to be one of the greatest first rounds ever, both Hagler and Hearns emerged from their corners and began throwing a litany of punches into each other’s heads. Early on Hearns had the upper-hand, bloodying Hagler and keeping him off-balance with his long reach and right hand jabs. Sugar Ray (R) vs. Tommy Hearns
no unanimous winner, it was Hearns who was leading heading into the 13th round. Before coming out for the 13th Leonard’s trainers Angelo Dundee would tell him, “You’re blowing it son!” His words seemed to have the desired effect. Leonard dominated the 13th round, and at one point he even knocked Hearns through the ropes. His barrage didn’t let up and in the 14th Leonard delivered a ferocious series of punches that dazzled the arena. The fight was halted and Leonard would go on the win.
4 May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS
Hagler was able to weather the storm, and about half-way through the first, he came back with his own barrage of hooks and body shots. By the time the second round began it was clear Hagler had figured Hearns out, but that didn’t Micky Ward vs. stop either fighter from continuing Arturo Gatti I — to throw everything they had at each May 18, 2002 other. Wobbly, Hearns would valiantly Ward and Gatti fought three times, fight on until the third when Hagler but the best match was their first. Ward would finally knock him out. www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com
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Rocky Marciano vs. Jersey Joe Walcott — September 23, 1952
Marciano was a wild, powerful and undefeated boxer when he challenged Walcott for the title in 1952. Walcott called Marciano “amateurish,” but his 42-0 record was nothing to sneeze at. Early on Walcott dominated this fight, knocking Marciano down in the first. Walcott was clearly the better technician, but as this one dragged on it because a slug-fest. No one could out punch Marciano and Walcott tired in the middle of the fight. Even so, Walcott gave Marciano all he had but the challenger seemed to routinely shrug off punches that would have dropped lesser men. Entering the 13th round Marciano knew he would need a knockout to win this one. He delivered. Midway through the round Marciano knocked Walcott out with a vicious right, rendering Walcott unconscious and winning the match. It was as close as Marciano ever came to losing.
Diego Corrales vs. Jose Luis-Castillo — May 7, 2005
Boxing had become something of a niche spot by the turn of the millennium. MMA fighting was taking center stage and few thought that this WBC title fight in 2005 would become legendary. It began swiftly and wouldn’t let up for ten rounds. Castillo had finished most of the rounds extremely well and came out strong in the 10th quickly knocking Corrales down twice. The second time the referee imposed a onepoint penalty on Corrales because he kept removing his mouth-piece. After the second time down Corrales seemed to reenergize himself and blasted Castillo with several quick combinations, before eventually knocking him out. The reprieve Corrales received from spitting out his mouth-piece seemed to help him regain enough wherewithal to finish off Castillo. BOXING, cont’d. on Page 16
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FUNNY, TALENTED, FAMOUS AND ON TOUR IN SAN DIEGO
Shawn Wayans By Carlos Kremer Shawn Wayans is bringing his vast array of talents to The American Comedy Company in San Diego Friday, May 7 through Sunday, May 9, and I cannot wait. Best known for his roles on big screen movies such as White Chicks, Little Man and Scary Movie, and his role with brothers Keenen and Damon in the show In Living Color. He also had a four-year run on TV with brother Marlon on Wayan’s Brothers TV Show. This is a family that was destined for stardom. Not due to his parents who had no involvement in entertainment but were hard-working, honest and people of their word but from his older siblings who had a burning desire to perform standup comedy and entertain.
Shawn followed the lead of older brother Keenan who had quit college in his senior year to pursue comedy and follow the dreams and passion that engulfed his life. Shawn says, “Every time Keenan was coming home to stay a few days, me and Marlon had a show for him. We had a new character that we had developed and he gave us the yes or no if it was a hit or a miss. He would let us know what to improve upon and how to get there so we had early experiences writing and creating that proved to be invaluable later.” Dinners at the Wayans house proved to be the training ground that cultivated and shaped Shawn’s later life in Hollywood. “The toughest audience for me, tougher than any venue or club, was my family and if they thought a
ENTERTAINMENT
skit or character was funny.” All ten of the Wayans kids are successful actors, directors, writers and comedians. When I asked him how he stayed on the right path and away from “evil” managers, handlers and temptations of Hollywood, he said it was easy. “My family kept me in check, always. We trusted each other and we stayed with each other, had the same managers and publicists and stayed on that proven path. We kept our heads, stayed focused and appreciated the journey and the opportunity.” Impressive. A star who really appreciates the process. Shawn’s big break came when he was given an extra role in a film that brothers Keenen and Damon had parts in — the 1988 comedy I’m Gonna Get You Sucka. The family stepped up yet again to help and that paved the way for his later success, but he earned it. The next opportunity was on the show In Living Color where Shawn had a production assistant position on the show. A DJ was needed and he was asked to step in and the rest is history. He joined brothers Keenan, Damon and Marlon
on that show and his rise to stardom quickly followed. Other huge celebrities who launched their career from that show include Jim Carrey, Chris Rock and Jennifer Lopez. Shawn’s comedic style is as unique as the many characters that he can become. His early influences of movies were The Kentucky Fried Movie and Monty Python’s The Holy Grail. Humor that can be deep, dark and laugh at anything with the right twist on it. “Nothing was sacred and that pushed the limits of how far we would go,” Wayans said. During this interview, I was impressed by his professionalism and focus and his gratitude for our military and the freedom it provides. I asked him what words he had for our troops and he stated “Save faith and keep fighting. If you served time in the military, you can do anything in life that you set your sights to achieve. Hollywood, acting, comedy, business, whatever you choose to tackle is nothing compared to what you’ve done for our WAYANS, cont’d. on Next Page
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Jared Leto’s ‘Joker’ is the stuff of nightmares By Kate Seamons Newser Staff Marking an anniversary by sharing a photo on Twitter is a pretty routine thing to do, but Suicide Squaddirector David Ayer did just that in a pretty atypical way yesterday. He marked the Joker’s April 25, 1940, comic book debut by tweeting the first image released of Jared Leto as Joker, the role he’s playing in the film. It’s a Joker complete with green hair, crimson lips, nasty teeth, and a tattoo-heavy body. Among the ink: “HA” repeated over and over, and a cursive “Damaged” on the forehead. Rolling Stone reports the look was inspired by Batman: The Killing Joke, and points out that it’s not the first time Ayer has referenced Alan Moore’s graphic novel. That leads the magazine to speculate that Leto’s turn as the Joker in the film—due Aug. 5, 2016—will hew closer to Moore’s Joker, a bust-of-a-standup comic who is disfigured and goes crazy in the span of a single day. USA Today also calls out a harlequin skull tattoo on Leto’s chest, which it sees as “most likely an ode to his Suicide Squad girlfriend Harley Quinn.” She’s
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played by Margot Robbie. The rest of the big-name cast includes Will Smith as Deadshot, Viola Davis as Amanda Waller, Cara Delevingne as Enchantress, and Joel Kinnaman as Rick Flagg. What they’ll be doing, per the IMDB description: “A secret government agency recruits imprisoned supervillains to execute dangerous black ops missions in exchange for clemency.” HEALTH
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Cont’d. from Previous Page country.” Shawn Wayans is super talented, super focused and family oriented at all times. He’s a true success in a industry that can and does destroy the weak. Just another reason why I can’t wait to see and support him, and hope you do as well. Old school ethics and family values show that the good guys still can win. Visit www.AmericanComedyCo.com for ticket information and I’ll see you at the show! HEALTH
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News briefs...
‘Military Mistress’ wanted in 3 states is stopped, let go PORTLAND, Ore. — Oregon authorities say the woman dubbed the “Military Mistress” was stopped by sheriff’s deputies in Alabama who seized the stolen car she and her current husband were living in, but then released the pair because they were not suspected of any local crimes. The Marion County Sheriff’s Office says 39-year-old Bobbi Ann Finley and her new husband are wanted for writing bad checks in Oregon, Colorado and Oklahoma. The sheriff’s office said it was notified Tuesday that the couple had been stopped by the Mobile County Sheriff’s Office in Alabama.
Finley got her nickname in 2010, when national news outlets spotlighted allegations she went from one military base to the next, marrying service members to gain access to their bank accounts. In all, she married 14 U.S. service members.
Military education authors to sign books at Barnes & Noble Oceanside Jillian Ventrone and Robert Blue, authors of “From the Marine Corps to College: Transitioning from the Service to Higher Education” and “From Navy to College: Transitioning from the Service to Higher Education” will discuss how to navigate the various benefits and resources available to Sailors and Marines looking to take advantage of opportunities on Saturday, May 9,
4 p.m., Barnes & Noble, 2615 Vista Way. Veterans’ education benefits are a source of much discussion, but often hard to decipher. These two books have been proclaimed by numerous experts as a “one stop resource” for Marine and Navy personnel, useful to active and transitioning personnel, enlisted and commissioned, and spouses and dependents.
Walk For Animals: Paws In The Park
More than 5,000 animal lovers and 2,000 of their four-legged friends will gather to take part in San Diego Humane Society Walk for Animals: Paws in the Park - San Diego on Saturday, May 9 at NTC Park at Liberty Station, 2455 Cushing Road, San Diego. The morning festivities include a delicious pancake breakfast, a scenic two-mile walk, fun-filled doggie activities, an “Ask a Trainer” booth, and Vendor Village. sign up online at www.sdhumane. org/walk to pre-register or make a donation.
TierraFest is Coming!
Central San Diego’s best Arts & Crafts Fair will be held May 16 from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. the Tierrasanta Town Center shopping complex (Albertson’s) at 10633 Tierrasanta Blvd. Come browse the beautiful handmade craft items made by talented local artisans. Bring the kids; there will be plenty of games and other activities to amuse them. Tierrasanta’s annual Patriot’s Day Parade starts at 10 a.m.; the Barbeque Dinner runs from 4 to 9 p.m., and at dusk, a huge Fireworks display blasts off. Come and enjoy a day full of fun! For more information, please call Amy at (858) 573-2648 or Email @ amyhall@san.rr.com.
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No women pass Marine Infantry Officer School by the end of the experiment By Bryant Jordan Military.com The last two female Marines hoping to make their way through the Marine Corps’ Infantry Officer Course as part of an experiment to integrate the program washed out on April 2, ending the research phase of the project. The two were cut during the physically and academically demanding Combat Endurance Test, along with 81 of the 90 male Marines who applied for the program, Marine Corps Times reported April 8. Female Marine officers who sought entry to IOC were not expected to meet the same physical fitness screening standards as male Marines, but they were required to match male performance in the course, Marine Corps spokeswoman Capt. Maureen Krebs told Military. com in November. The 13-week school historically averages a 25-percent attrition rate. During the first day’s grueling Combat Endurance Test, Marines wear combat gear, perform various physical tasks and answer tactical questions while negotiating a landnavigation course, Krebs said. The experiment began more than two years ago as part of a broader look at the possibility of opening ground combat specialties to women. Since then, 29 women volunteered for IOC at Quantico, Krebs said Friday. Of the first group of 10 to volunteer for the course, nine failed to make it through the first day. The remaining female Marine dropped out a week later after being injured on the course. Last October, three of the seven female volunteers made it through the Combat Endurance Test. Two of those who passed were captains. However, none of the women completed the program. Of the two who washed out in April, one was a volunteer and the other was sent as a member of the Corp’s recently integrated ground intelligence track. Though the IOC door has now closed for volunteers, women applying for ground intelligence officer slots will have to pass the program in order to attain that specialty, just like any male Marine would, Krebs said. The Corps opened the ground intelligence officer specialty to female Marines in July 2013. Data from the experiment will be compiled and analyzed. Marine Corps Commandant Gen. Joseph Dunford will use the analysis to issue a recommendation to Defense Secretary Ashton Carter on how the Corps intends to open up certain combat-arms jobs to women in 2016. The Corps will also be studying the results of the gender-integration EXPERIMENT, cont’d. on Page 18
www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com
In a 2002 photo, Mary Doyle Keefe poses at her home in Nashua, NH, with the May 29, 1943, cover of the Saturday Evening Post for which she modeled as “Rosie the Riveter” in a Norman Rockwell painting.
Rosie the Riveter model dead at 92 (NEWSER) – Mary Doyle Keefe, the model for Norman Rockwell’s iconic 1943 Rosie the Riveter painting that symbolized the millions of American women who went to work on the home front during World War II, died Tuesday after a brief illness in Simsbury, Connecticut. She was 92. Keefe grew up in Arlington, Vermont, where she met Rockwell—who lived in West Arlington—and posed for his painting when she was a 19-year-old telephone operator. The painting was on the cover of
the Saturday Evening Poston May 29, 1943. Keefe, who never riveted herself, was paid $5 for each of two mornings she posed for Rockwell and his photographer, Gene Pelham, whose pictures Rockwell used when he painted. Although Keefe was petite, Rockwell’s Rosie the Riveter had large arms, hands, and shoulders. Rockwell wanted Rosie to show strength and modeled her body on Michelangelo’s Isaiah, which is on the ceiling of the ROSIE, cont’d. on Page 18
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May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 9
Cool gifts for Mom Carrie Dunham Collection
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Drifter Laptop Backpack
The drifter is easy to wear, pockets in all the right places and comfortable to boot. A hint of retro design yet space for all the daily tech needs. Room for work docs, gym gear, lunch, umbrella, waterbottle, etc. It’s a thoughtful pack - lightweight despite its size and capacity. The drifter is the perfect carry for a 15” laptop, tablet, phone and all necessities of everyday life or world travel. www.stmbags.com.
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RFID readers. Carry as a wristlet or keep in a larger purse. $24.99. www. justsolutions.com.
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Use the Journal 10 to document the first decade of a child’s life, record a whole family’s important milestones or create your own personal memoir for posterity. The Journal 10 provides the ideal tool to put an actual pen to actual paper and create an actual permanent memoir. Just scribble down a few sentences each day and, before you know it, you have a decade of memories and observations at your fingertips! www.journal10.com.
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(Patent Pending)- the Hang It jewelry organizer lets her efficiently store earrings (28 earring holes), necklaces, bracelets and rings. Made out of solid steel, this sturdy hanger keeps necklaces untangled and jewelry unvarnished all while saving space. Hang in closet for easy matching with outfits too. Available in black, silver, and pink and deluxe velvet. Travel versions coming soon. $9.99 original, $5.99 mini, 11.49 Velvet. www.justsolutions.com.
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10 May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS
www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com
Final Draft Preview
Offense or defense? Which will get the upgrade in the first round...
CHARGERS REPORT By Art Garcia With GM Tom Telesco insisting that Philip Rivers is still a part of the Chargers’ long-term plans, many believe a draft-day trade with the Tennessee Titans involving Rivers for the No. 2 pick overall is still a possibility. And now that Todd Gurley has received a positive grade from his physician regarding his torn ACL, reports have the former Georgia running back shooting up the draft board and being selected in the top 10 – long before the Chargers pick at 17. The reports on Gurley could be part of the annual pre-draft rumors that cir-
culate every year where the hype of a player propels him up the draft board. But if Gurley is taken before the Chargers are on the clock, look for Telesco to address the defensive side of the ball where many voids need to be filled. Defensive end/tackle, outside linebacker, cornerback and safety are all positions Telesco will be looking to upgrade as the team lost some key veteran leadership to retirement (Jarret Johnson) and free agency (Marcus Gilchrist; Andrew Gachkar; Reggie Nelson; Shareece Wright and Dwight Freeney). As if those concerns on defense
aren’t bad enough, All-Pro safety Eric Weddle is sitting out voluntary workouts for the first time in his career because he feels ‘highly disrespected’ that the front office has not entered talks about a possible contract extension. Despite finishing the 2014 season ranked No. 9 in total defense (21.8 pts. per gm/338 yds. per gm) and No. 4 against the pass (214.2 yds. per gm); the Chargers defense produced a measly seven interceptions and ranked No. 26 against the run (124.1 yds. per gm) and No. 29 in sacks (26.0). Whether Telesco upgrades the offense or defense in the first round is anyone’s guess. However, one thing is for sure – in perhaps the most important draft in franchise history the Chargers must select players who will make an immediate impact on both sides of the ball.
Most NFL analysts agree this draft is deep at the running back position and a good one can be found in the second and third rounds. With that in mind, here is a look at two defensive prospects a few draft pundits have the Chargers selecting in their respective mock drafts.
Danny Shelton – 6-2/339, Washington
A true Senior and three-year starter, Pro Football Now ranks Shelton the No. 2 defensive tackle in the draft. Shelton completed his career with 203 tackles; 24.0 tackles for loss; 11.5 sacks; five pass defensed and seven fumble recoveries. Todd McShay (ESPN) has the Chargers taking Shelton with their first pick. McShay: “Running back, left guard CHARGERS, cont’d. on Page 17
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May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 11
Harry S. Truman 33rd President of the U.S. Served from Apr. 12, 1945 – Jan. 20, 1953
“I never did give anybody hell. I just told the truth and they thought it was hell.” — Harry S. Truman
Vice President of the U.S. office Vacant by ascension of then VP Truman when Franklin Roosevelt died in office
World events
• Adolf Hitler moves into his underground bunker, the so-called Fuhrerbunket • Nazis begin to evacuate Auschwitz concentration camp • U.S. troops liberate Buchenwald, a German concentration camp • Dachau liberated • Manilla, capital of the Philippines, is liberated by American forces • Italian partisans execute Benito Mussolini • Britsh troops liberate Belsen concentration camp finding no running water and thousands of rotting corpses • Adolf Hitler and his wife of one
day, Eva Braun, commit suicide • V-E Day commemorates the end of WWII in Europe • Germany is divided between Allied occupation forces • The U.S. detonates an atomic bomb nicknamed “Fat Man” over the city of Nagasaki, Japan • Emperor Hirohito announces Japan’s surrender on the radio • WWII ends • First German war crimes trial begins • Ho Chi Minh declares independence of Vietnam from France • United Nations created • Five U.S. Navy bombers are lost in the Bermuda Triangle
arienburg ombing M b s s re rt ing Fo B-17 Fly
Atomic bomb hits H
British PM Winston Churchill, Presiden sign the Ya
1945 Cadillac Convertible
12 May April 1, 15,2015 2015THE THEMILITARY MILITARYPRESS PRESS
www.MilitaryPress.com • editorsdesk@militarypress.com
1945 Dodge Truck
remember when...
5 4 19 U.S. news
• President Roosevelt, British PM Winston Churchill and Soviet leader Josef Stalin sign the Yalta Agreement • The USS Indianapolis is sunk by Japanese submarine killing 883 seamen. Many were killed by shark stack while awaiting rescue. • USS Franklin severely damaged, 700 lives lost • The U.S. takes control of Okinawa, Japan • U.S. celebrates V-J Day (victory in Japan) • U.S. Marines land on Iwo Jima • Franklin Roosevelt dies in office • U.S. bomber crashes into the 79th floor of the Empire State Building
g over raising the fla U.S. Marines hi on Iwo Jima Mt. Surabac
Hirosh ima
Technology
• Percy Spencer accidentally discovers that microwaves can heat food • In 1945, only 5,000 homes have TV sets
Surveyin g th after be e damage on ing hit b U y a 300 SS Indiana lb. bom b
nt Roosevelt, and Soviet leader Josef Stalin alta Agreement
1945 Ford Sportsman EVENTS, cont’d. on Page 20 For advertising information, call (858) 537-2280 • advertising@militarypress.com
April May15, 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 13
in horror as the ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. Indeed, the ball hit one of the men and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize. She then explained that she was a physical therapist and offered to help ease his “pain.” “Please allow me to help, I am a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you’d just allow me!” She told him earnestly. “Ummph, oooh, nnnoo, I’ll be alright...I’ll be fine in a few minutes,” he replied as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together at his crotch.
Just for Laughs Pain reliever
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed-off and watched
The woman takes it upon herself to begin to “ease his pain.” She began to massage his groin. After a few moments she asked, “does that feel better?” The man looked up at her and replied, “Yes, that feels pretty good ... but my thumb still hurts like hell!”
Size does matter
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he’s drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball. The bartender screams at the guy, “Your monkey just ate the cue ball off my pool table -- whole!” “Sorry,” replied the guy. “He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I’ll
STORAGE
pay for everything.” The man finishes his drink, pays and leaves. Two weeks later, he’s in the bar with his pet monkey, again. He orders a drink, and the monkey starts running around the bar. The monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. “Did you see what your monkey did now?” he asks. “Yeah,” replies the guy. “He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures stuff first.”
Password fail
A husband and wife were trying to set up a new password to their computer. A husband, “Put ‘MYP*NIS’,” and the wife fell on the ground laughing cause on screen was error, “Error. Not long enough.”
Mission accomplished
A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?” The husband replied, “All I wanted to do was to screw your brains out, and suck your breasts dry.” Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, “What are you thinking now?” He replied, “It looks as if I did a pretty good job.”
PUZZLE PAGE
Snap judgement
ACROSS 1. An alloy of copper and zinc 6. Manacle 10. Kind of school 14. Stud 15. Hodgepodge 16. Angel’s headwear 17. Love intensely 18. Nonexistent 19. Creative work 20. Original 22. Anagram of “Tine” 23. Former Italian currency 24. Worn away 26. Contributes 30. Slice 31. 18-wheeler 32. Jump 33. Part of a foot 35. Chafes 39. Belly 41. Palatable 43. Not fresh 44. Boom 46. Urgent request 47. Type 49. Euro forerunner 50. Skirt lines 51. Scour 54. Part in a play 56. ___ du jour = Meal of the day 57. Powered by electricity 63. Hindu princess 64. Compassion 65. Draw forth 66. Therefore 67. Send forth 68. Cyphers
A man, who smelled like a distillery, flopped down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man’s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the disheveled man turned to the priest and said, “Say, Father, what causes arthritis?” “Mister, it’s caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man.” “Well, I’ll be damned,” the drunk muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. “I’m very sorry, I didn’t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?” “I don’t have it, Father. I was just reading that the Pope does.”
No back up
69. Observed 70. Dash 71. Amount of hair DOWN 1. Fiber source 2. Go on horseback 3. Affirm 4. Slave 5. Pilfer 6. Harmonious 7. Emit long loud cries 8. Dossier 9. File cover 10. Record player
11. Speedy 12. Wash out with a solvent 13. Modelled 21. Recess 25. Break in friendly relations 26. “What a shame!” 27. Money owed 28. Early 20th-century art movement 29. Pillaging 34. White blood cell 36. Competent 37. The original matter (cosmology)
14 May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS
38. Oceans 40. Blend 42. Grownup 45. Religious outcast 48. Custodian 51. French for “After” 52. Cacophony 53. Cooktop 55. Construct 58. City in Peru 59. Smell 60. Naked 61. Frosts 62. To tax or access
SUDOKU The rules to play Sudoku are quite simple. Fill in the blanks so that each row, each column, and each of the nine 3x3 grids contain one instance of each of the numbers 1 through 9.
This week’s solutions:
A woman didn’t come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. A man didn’t come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend’s house. The wife called her husband’s 10 best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had slept over and 2 said he was still there.
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Reasons to buy a home during PCS relocation About 38% of service members own their own homes. It’s a big step, but even during an uncertain and confusing time like PCS season, many still find it in their best interest to buy a private home. Here are a few of the factors that influence the thinking of veterans who’ve purchased a home:
Location Options
When you buy a home of your own, you don’t just pick the house – you choose the neighborhood too. Some families prefer an urban or a country lifestyle, and these options may not be available with some military housing. Buying a house of your own also means you’ll have greater control over your school district and your children’s education.
housing and your spouse moves out, you may be forced to give up your home to another family. Sometimes you can even be asked to move if your living situation remains the same. The Base Realignment and Closure Commission (or BRAC) agency has the power to close down DoD real estate. To cut back on spending, BRAC will often close bases where military members are living if those areas aren’t being fully used or aren’t up to military standards. The next round of possible closures will happen in 2015, which means families who have a PCS relocation this year may be forced to move out of military housing.
Affordable Mortgage Payments
When military members research their new areas before PCS relocation, sometimes they’re surprised at just how affordably the nearby homes are priced. Most VA purchase loans are obtained without a down payment, and loans never require monthly mortgage insurance premiums. In fact, after learning about VA loans, service members often realize that they can afford a house
that’s bigger than what they imagined. What’s more, in many areas owning a home can actually be cheaper than renting one. For these reasons, a lot of officers put their housing allowance toward home ownership. Some even have money left over at the end of the month – money that they can use for whatever they’d like.
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Quality Housing
In many areas, it can be easier to find high-quality private homes than it is to find adequate on-base homes. According to figures released by the Office of the Deputy Under Secretary of Defense Installations and Environment, “About 43 percent of DoD base housing, 58,000 units, are old and in need of extensive repair.” Those who opt for military housing during PCS season may not get assigned to a living area that’s up to their standards. If you’re purchasing your own home, you may have more control of where you and your family live.
Independence
Although living on base may provide a means to feel connected to the military community, many active-duty military personnel buy homes because they like the idea of owning private property. Living off base allows service members to connect with their town and with the varied people who live in it. Living on your own also means you won’t have to abide by some of the strict rules that often come with military housing, like lights-out policies, surprise home inspections or home and lawn care limitations.
Putting Down Roots
Military moves can make it hard for service men and women to feel connected to a community. When officers begin to think about relocating for what may be the last time as their careers draw to a close, many of them decide to plan for their future by purchasing a home. This way, when they retire, they may not need to worry about moving all over again.
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Cont’d. from Page 11
Aaron Pryor vs. Alex Arguello — November 12, 1981 Pryor was originally set to fight Leonard, but when Sugar Ray retired because of a detached retina, they substituted Arguello. No slouch himself, Arguello was a heavy favorite and was attempting to become the first man to win four different titles in four different weight classes. Despite being a 12-5 favorite, Arguello had trouble with Pryor from the onset. He controlled most of the fight but the boastful Pryor wouldn’t go away and in the later rounds he would take control, hammering Arguello until the referee was forced to stop the fight. This fight was marred by the use of a strange black bottle the trainers were giving to Pryor between rounds – leading many to question the contents. Despite the controversy, this was a timeless battle between two of the best boxers at the time.
Julio Cesar Chavez vs. Melrick Taylor 1 — March 17, 1990
One of the most controversial fights ever fought, this bout was dubbed as, “Thunder versus Lightning,” and it featured one of the most dramatic endings in boxing. During the match Taylor used his speed and quickness to evade Chavez and land any punch he wanted. He built a steady lead during the fight, though Chavez was hurting Taylor when he did manage to connect he was struggling with the faster fighter. Taylor was emphatically leading the fight as it entered the 12th round but Taylor’s corner instructed him to win the final round in order to secure the victory. Taylor was clearly exhausted, so much so that he fell throwing a punch in the 12th round! Eventually Chavez delivered a solid minute of boxing and pummeled Taylor into submission, knocking him to the canvas with only a couple seconds left in the match. The Referee asked Taylor if he could continue. Some claim Taylor nodded yes, but the referee decided that since Taylor refused to answer – awarded Chavez a knockout.
16 May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS
Joe Louis vs. Billy Conn — June 18, 1941
Conn was something of an underdog heading into this match with Joe Louis. Louis outweighed Conn by 25 pounds. After this fight was over Louis admitted to not working as hard for the fight because he didn’t want to beat up on a smaller opponent. Conn entered this bout with a stout defense and wore Louis down over the course of 13 rounds. Louis became dehydrated late in the match and it was fairly clear that Conn was in the lead. However, the noted underdog grew overconfident by his success and Louis fought back. In the 13th, despite being clearly ahead, Conn tried to knock Louis out – but Louis took advantage of the openings this strategy provided and knocked Conn out with only two seconds left on the clock in the 13th round.
Larry Holmes vs. Ken Norton — June 9, 1978
For 15 rounds these two heavyweights battered each other into submission. Entering the 15ththe judges
Diego Corrales (R) vs. Jose Luis Castillo
had Holmes and Norton even, meaning the final round would decide the victor. Even though the boxers couldn’t know this, they both emerged from their corner throwing punches like it was the first round. Early on Norton landed a couple devastating blows. He connected twice on Holmes’ jaw with a hook and an uppercut. Holmes, however, was not to be outdone. He pummeled Norton until the final bell and eventually won the match on a decision.
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Cont’d. from Page 3 in 2015, regardless of their opponent. Mayweather will likely fight again in September, and he’s indicated it will be the last fight of his career. Pacquiao has a contract with Top Rank through 2016, which calls for him to fight twice a year.
CHARGERS
Cont’d. from Page 11 and outside linebacker all are need positions for the Chargers, but they also could use an upgrade at nose tackle, and Shelton is the best NT prospect in this draft. He commands double-teams with his massive frame and is quicker than you’d expect for his size. He’s dominant against the run and shows the ability to collapse the pocket as a pass-rusher.”
Malcom Brown – 6-2/319, Texas
Although he’s ranked as one of the
top 20 players at any position, PFN ranks Brown as the No. 6 defensive tackle on the board. A true Junior entering the draft, the former Longhorn garnered a total of 165 tackles; 29.0 tackles for loss; 8.5 sacks; six pass defensed; two forced fumbles and two fumble recoveries as a three-year starter. Both Mel Kiper Jr. (ESPN) and Eddie Brown (Union Tribune) have the Chargers selecting Brown in the first round. Kiper: “No change here. I said before I can see a bunch of different players landing here — including a running back — but I think the fit of Brown as a needed two-gapping run-stopper to help the defensive line would be useful in the short term. This wasn’t a good run defense last year, and it starts in the middle. Brown isn’t a complete product yet, but he’s one of the better run-defending solutions among defensive linemen in this draft and the Chargers are going to want more inside than a guy like Sean Lissemore.” Eddie Brown: “I’ve advocated for defensive line help for the Chargers in the first round of the last two drafts, and since running back is a very deep position in this draft, the value lies with upgrading the trenches. Brown, a first-
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team All-Big 12 selection, has the skill set and versatility to line up anywhere on the D-line. He excels at plugging up the middle — which would enhance the entire defense — but also has the ability to disrupt the pocket and make his share of plays behind the line of scrimmage.”
The Endzone With Rivers and Weddle each entering the final year of his respective contract the time is now for the Chargers to start grooming replacements – which will not be easy. Although both are performing amongst the league’s best, Father Time eventually catches up to everyone. As one of the elite quarterbacks in the NFL, Rivers stands a much better chance of signing a big-money, longterm contract than Weddle – who, unfortunately, plays a position that doesn’t demand a high salary for a safety on the wrong side of 30. My sleeper pick for the Chargers is Shaq Thompson out of Washington. A true junior and threeyear starter, NFL.com lists Thompson as an outside linebacker but at 6’0/228 lbs. he fits the profile of the prototypical ‘tweener’ with “Unmatched diver-
sity in this year’s draft.” The recipient of the Paul Hornung Award as the nation’s most versatile player, Thompson scored six touchdowns in 2014 – two as a running back and four on defense (one interception return and three fumble returns). For his career, Thompson started 40 of 41 games; accumulated 223 tackles; 12.5 tackles for loss; 3.5 sacks; 10 pass defensed and five interceptions (Pro Football Now). The question around Thompson is where will he play as a pro? NFL Media analyst Gil Brandt reported a number of teams at the NFL Scouting Combine worked him out at running back and he talked to two teams, both say Thompson’s position in the NFL has to be SS (Strong Safety). Having lost Gilchrist to the Jets and the Weddle contract issue, upgrading the safety position is a must. If Telesco’s projected players are off the board when the Chargers are on the clock this Thursday night, why not trade back and stock-pile an extra pick or two? With running back, offensive and defensive line rated deep with talent, perhaps Telesco can land some impact players – hopefully Thompson will be one of them.
May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 17
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fully completed the and program were revisio not er by a Press Pittsburghwill artist that was used initial The Military provide layout one awarded the infantry military occupato sell war bonds, died in 2010. Cont’d. from Page 9 tional a specialty, Krebs of said.$75 per hou Any corrections after this will incur charge Sistine Chapel. Twenty-four years after
ROSIE
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The Corps will also consider data she posed, Rockwell sent her a letter EXPERIMENT gleaned from the Ground Combat Elcalling her the most beautiful Thiswoman ad begins with the issue. Cont’d.publication from Page 8 ement Integrated Task Force it estabhe’d ever seen and apologizing for the lished last May to research integrating experiment at the Infantry Training hefty body in the painting.Please “I did have proof your ad for typographical errors and omissions. to make you into a sort of a giant,” he Battalion course at Camp Lejeune, women into combat jobs. The task force If changes not received ________________ run as is. the lines of a battalis will modeled along Carolina,by where enlisted female ad wrote. Keefe went on to work as a den-areNorth ion landing team. Women volunteers tal hygienist and have four children Marines have had greater success. Fax the changes back to 858-578-3882 or call them in to 858-537-2280. are trained in ground combat arms with her husband of 55 years, who died As of February, 122 of the 358 skills and integrated into combat units, in 2003. The real-life Rosie the Riveter, the adasis OK as who is, sign and this pagewith anda research fax back. team observing perforwomen entered thedate course graduwho inspired the RockwellIfpainting well as the iconic “We Can Do It” post- ated. Women, however, who success- mance.
18 May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS
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The ad is OK to print as is: X
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Photos: linandjirsa.com
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May 1, 2015 THE MILITARY PRESS 19
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