Young Mens Forum Issue 1 Volume 1

YOUNG mFORUM VOLUME 1, ISSUE 2

NEWSLETTER

Watch out!

It is a crime!

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uys who take pictures of their penises or take a video of themselves masturbating or recording themselves or others having sex using their cell-phones and sending it around to girls or their friends are committing a crime!

Exposing persons under 18-years to sexual material and creating, distributing and possessing sexual images and material of persons under 18-years are criminal offences.

Children and young people stumble across one or other form of pornography in their own home or at school through friends, via cell-phones and computers linked to the internet.

Another learner from New Eisleben High School explains that he ‘usually sees pornographic material on his friend’s cell-phone’.

Despite what parents and educators might think, it appears that children and young people regularly come across or access material of a sexual nature via cell-phones or computers.

Those interviewed for this article all know how to access pornography and stated that many learners at their schools frequently access it or are exposed to it via their friends.

A learner from Elsies River High School says that he has seen pornography many times.

A learner from Proteus High School said he can ‘access pornography everyday in various ways’.

Another learner from Cedar High School said that he accessed pornography ‘via the internet and Mxit when some girls send pictures of their private parts’. It also emerged that many guys have porn on their cell-phones and some ‘participate in producing it’ according to a learner from Cathkin High School.

“Guys have porn on their cell-phones’’”!

Most learners interviewed understood pornography to include pictures of naked people, videos showing people engaging in sexual intercourse, images of a sexual nature and other sexual acts. Others identified pornography as involving children or under-aged teenagers.

According to a learner from Cathkin High School, the first time he saw pornography ‘it was on a computer via internet’.

Being motivated and inspired is not easy when the odds are stacked against you. Despite various challenges, there are many guys out there who remain focused and are determined to achieve their goals.

They are the cool guys who do not abuse others and commit violence or crime. They are the guys who are determined to achieve something positive in life.

The internet presents new challenges and dangers. It makes communication instant and easy; and without knowing you can commit a criminal offence. The 2010 FIFA World Cup is here and bet you are all very excited.

We wish Bafana Bafana success and pray they will do well and make South Africa proud!

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Y OUNG MENS FORUM NEWSLETTER , V OL 1, ISSUE 2 Molo Songololo extend an apology to any learner, educator, principal or school who found the articles on ‘safety at schools’ and ‘sex, alcohol, drugs and HIV’ in the last issue misrepresenting. The articles reflects the experiences, opinions and thoughts of learners interviewed concerning safety and sexual conduct of learners at their schools.

The articles highlight that learners feel unsafe at their schools and that teachers and principles are often unaware of the daily experiences they endure.

The learners make various suggestions as to what can be done to improve the situation in their schools. Molo Songololo is committed to support schools to prevent abuse, violence and crime by offering awareness and educational activities to learners.

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...abuse and exploitation of children From Page 1 The learner from Elsies River High School explains that there is a large volume of pornography that ‘involves children and teens that can be accessed via the internet’.

He feels that ‘it is wrong to use children for pornography’. It is exploitation and abuse of children he explains. The learner from Proteas High School agrees that child pornography is hurting children and teenagers and he is against it.

Almost anyone with a cell-phone or computer linked to the internet can access, download, produce, or distribute pornography or child pornography.

In some cases children and young people also create child pornography by record themselves or other teens engaging in sexual acts using their cell-phones.

The learner from New Eisleben High School agreed and said ‘we bring our cell-phones into school that have pornographic picture and videos.

All learners agreed that child pornography is wrong and should not be allowed.

However it appears that sexual curiosity, experimentation and exploration are factors that drive guys to access pornography or record themselves or others.

Are you ‘cyber’ smart?

Cell-phones and computers linked with the internet are wonderful communication tools. You can contact and talk to people all over the world. With it came new words and ways of expressing oneself Off-line – means you in the real world – not connected to the internet Virtual or cyber world – means you are on-line, connected to the internet Web site - It is like a library with information which anyone can access. Individuals, organizations, businesses and clubs have web sites Chat room – is a room in the cyber world – you can not enter a chat room without a password (key)

Shevone aged 16 who is a grade 11 leaner at Lavender Hill High School does not see the use of cell-phones during school hours.

She supports a no-cell-phone policy for learners at schools.

Password – this is a key you need to enter a website or chat room Email – electronic mail sent via the internet to your computer or cell-phone SMS – an electronic word message sent via the internet from one cell-phone to another

Deborah Mobylin from the FPB and learners from Mountview High School listening to actor Misheck Mavuso talking about child pornography

Thando Ntlabathi, 16-years from New Eisleben High School said at his previous school a guy filmed his girlfriend naked and then later the video clip was shown around and forwarded to learners via their cell-phones.

Nolubabalo, Andisiwe, Zinathi, Zimasa and Nwabisa from New Eisleben High School did not know much about child pornography.

They are now better informed and can protect themselves, their families and friends.

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What exactly is child pornography?

According to the law, child pornography is defined as any image, picture or description regardless of how it was created depicting a real or imaginary person under the age of 18 or representing a person under 18-years;

• engaged or involved in any form of sexual activity

• participating or assisting another person to participate in any form of sexual activity or

Child pornography is also described as ‘child abuse images’. Under South African law it is a crime to create, possess or distribute child pornography. If you come across child pornography and watch it without taking immediate steps to report it to the police or erase it, you can be guilty of a criminal offence.

Learners from Cedar High School spoke to us about the dangers of chatting on the internet

Child abuse images

• any picture that shows or writing that describes, the body or any part of the body of a person under 18 years that amounts to sexual exploitation

Be aware!

During the month of February 2010, Molo Songololo teamed up with the Film and Publications Board and conducted awareness amongst learners and educators about child pornography and dangers for teens via the internet. Isidingo star, Misheck Mavuso who cause much excitement amongst learners and educators alike, explained why child pornography is illegal and why there are age restrictions on films and other materials.

Misheck Mavuso addressing learners at Lavender Hill High School about child pornography

Film ratings to protect children Many of you might have tried or already watched a movie meant for adults that have an age restriction. Have you ever wondered why there are these age restrictions?

A - stands for all ages and is suitable foreveryone

Many movies have images, stories and sound that impact on children and youngsters. In some cases it can have a negative impact because children and youngsters don’t have the ability to know the difference between fact (reality) and fiction (fantasy).

Content that is not suitable for children and youngsters to be exposed to include strong images of violence, very scary stories, language (swearing), racism or sex.

10M - stands for ‘Matured Accompaniment’ children under 10 may watch but only if they are with an adult.

The Film and Publications Board is responsible to rate all films and material to ensure children’s rights are protected and not exposed to harmful material. The Board rates all films, videos and DVDs released in South Africa and gives it an age rating indicating which age groups are legally permitted to view. For example;

PG - stands for ‘Parental Guidance’, suitable for everyone—parents may not wanttheir young children to watch.

13 - means that children 13 and older maywatch the movie 16 - teenagers 16 and over may watch, not suitable those younger teens 18 - means that the movie contains strong images The following symbols may also appear L – Stands for ‘STRONG LANGUAGE’ such as swearing V – Stands for VIOLENCE such as abuse, brutality, fighting and killing P – Stands for PREJUDICE such as racism and discrimination N – Stands for NUDITY such as naked scenes S – Stands for SEX such as sex scenes

Learners from New Eisleben High School with Misheck Mavuso waving Red cards against trafficking, abuse and exploitation of children

Report child Pornography HOTLINE 0800 148 148 If you have a photo or video of a naked girl or boy who is under 18 years on your cell-phone you are in possession of child pornography

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Guys on the

Remember me for who I am I grew up in Mitchell’s Plain and a lot of youth in this community look up to the wrong people.

I was one of them standing on the corner the whole day letting everything fall apart. One day a man told me that even the guys who collect the rubbish were young and had dreams of becoming something in this world but they made wrong decisions and they did not have vision.

At that point I reaslised that once I get rid of the bad company, I would be taking a big step in my life. There are a lot of things you do that keep you behind like drug abuse and gangsterism. Everyday was a challenge for me as I wanted to be the best I could be and I didn’t want to abuse my talents. Dancing was my escape into my own world, and got me out of poverty. Now dancing is a big part of my life. My next goal is to get matric and get into university because there is a world out there that I want to explore.

I don’t like bragging but I am a role model to a lot of youngsters. They are into tutting, waving, popping, locking, vibrating and animation. I take youngsters from the community to Hip-hop Indabas, competitions and battles. No matter what your situation is there is a way to live your life positively by being a believer. I don’t want people to remember me for what I have done, but for who I am. When times are hard you should make a choice to benefit yourself.

- Michael Wicomb, grade 11, Cedar High School

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Keep on walking!

Put your mind to it!

Be the change!

‘Through adversity keep on walking’ – This basically means that you have to keep on walking forward. This saying has been boosting me forward for many years.

Motivating and inspiring and pushing me forward when I thought that I couldn’t go on. My late grandfather told me this. It is because of him that I strive to do my best and to accomplish my goals. I know that he would have wanted me to do my best and to live my life without regrets.

Life is like a coin. You can only use it once.

So rather use it wisely. Believe in yourself and in what you aim to achieve with the ‘coin’. Life is made of ups and downs, smiles and frowns. That is how it should be because you would not celebrate for something you really did not work hard to achieve.

One thing I came across as a teenager and young man is that in life you must always stay true to yourself. There are hurdles that we as guys face that dictate our self-esteem.

Things like crime, sex, sexuality, family problems and peer pressure.

I am telling you this in order for you to understand and try to comprehend life’s biggest mystery. Even though all things are stacked up against you there will always be someone that will help you up and out of the dirt. You might think that you are alone in life but there are always people that care about you and can help you.

Remember that yesterday is the past, tomorrow is unknown, and today is a gift, that’s why it’s called a ‘present’.

Mogamaat Noer Kamaar, Grade 11, Elsies River High School

The remedy for hard time is hope and to endure while being determined and hard working. It is not always easy to survive in this world. We come from different backgrounds and living in different areas but its up to you to change things around.

We know that good things don’t come in packages and the road to victory is always rocky and long. One has to take it one step at a time. You can do anything, anytime, anywhere but only if you put your mind to it.

Luvo Madikane, Grade 10, Simunye High School

We try to look up to role-models or people we can admire. Yet do these people influence us in a positive way? In today’s life the majority of men and women, but focussing on men; there is no one we can really look up to.

How can we look up to men who rape and abuse our daughters, sisters and mothers?

How can we look up to men who don’t take care of themselves? As young guys we need to look at ourselves and question who we are, what we want, and how to achieve it and be an example to our peers and the next generation.

There are many platforms that we can use to express and generate our positive feelings and ambitions; like music, rap, dance, poetry and drama… change must first start with us!

That is the first step.

Nicholus Sithole, Cathkin School

‘Nique-Floe’ Grade 11, High

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Growing up is not easy. There are many things that guys have to deal with on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s problems at home, at schools, in the community; issues amongst friends or not having money for your basic needs can make life very difficult.

Getting involved with the wrong crowd and making the wrong decisions are easy. Guys from ten different schools talk about what motivates and helps them to deal with life’s challenges.

2010 - Year for the youth!

This is the year you have been waiting for! It is year the for young people to vow to do great things. It is not a matter of talking. It is a matter of taking actions that change and determine your future. Many doors are being opened for the youth. Even those who passed matric years ago and still don’t know what to do with their lives; its time to stand your ground. Its time to shine! Don’t let 2010 pass and your life remains unchanged, you can do better. This year is short, with 2010 FIFA World Cup excitement. - Athenkosi Mongo, Grade 11, Luhlaza High School

Be aware and keep safe!

Stand by each other

Think about the consequences

Parents must stop sweeping problems under the carpet and solve them by giving more attention and love to their children; and give full attention too their kids safety.

We as the new generation should stand up against crime. Many problems cross our paths and get us down but you and I should stand against it. Drug abuse and crime influence our lives.

Young nation, wake up! Smell the coffee!

Life is not only getting harder but it seems shorter nowadays due to the fact that time flies and years go by so quickly. Our nation is filled with potential and the people in control of that potential should use it wisely.

Life is like a wheelbarrow for us the youth.

We should take full responsibility of our protection by always making sure we are accompanied in the streets when we go to or come from school.

Everyone has a choice to make in life.

Many people influence us and it affects us.

Making the right choice will make things easier and better. Making the wrong choice will affect your life and others close to you.

South Africa is hosting the 2010 FIFA World Cup. How can we welcome and make fans from other countries feel safe when we ourselves are not safe in South Africa?

Myself as a young man I choose a life of an example by always being the change I want to see or look for in others. I live everyday like it was my last, think about that.

What would you do and exactly how would you live if you knew tomorrow wasn’t promised? Guess what? Tomorrow is indeed not promised! Do the maths; this is not to save you but to motivate you on living purposefully. First and foremost thank the ‘man’ upstairs for enabling or allowing you to open your eyes and think about the consequences of your actions.

- Siyavuya Gwadiso, Grade 10, New Eisleben High School

- Marc Pululu, Grade 10, Proteus High School

Life throws many challenges whether good or bad that many don’t have the strength to face. We should be united as families and face and overcome abuse, exploitation of children.

So let’s stand by each other and support the choices you make.

- Wayne Pietersen, Grade 10, Lavender Hill High School,

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What your mama and papa won’t tell you!

Many guys are pressured into having sex or sexual relations.

In some cases they are pushed into it without being ready.

Sexual feeling is often very confusing, but it's a natural part of life. As you grow from child to adult your sexual feelings develop and change.

Sexual feelings

Bisexual

During the teen years, sexual feelings get stronger because of the hormonal and physical changes of puberty. Yes, besides getting an erection, guys also get sexual feelings and thoughts that develop as they get older. As your sexual feelings develop you will develop sexual attractions.

Many times guys don’t understand why they get certain feelings, who they are and who they're becoming. Knowing who you are includes understanding your sexual feelings and attractions.

People who are bisexual are romantically and physically attracted to members of both sexes.

Sexual attraction During the teens or puberty guys also develop sexual attractions. Some are earlier than others. Your sexual feelings sometimes determine to whom you are sexually attracted too. The term sexual orientation refers to the gender (that is, male or female) to which a person is attracted. There are several types of sexual orientation that are commonly described.

Heterosexual People who are heterosexual are romantically and physically attracted to members of the opposite sex: Heterosexual males are attracted to females, and heterosexual females are attracted to males. Heterosexuals are sometimes called "straight."

Homosexual People who are homosexual are romantically and physically attracted to people of the same sex. Females who are attracted to other females are called lesbian. Males who are attracted to other males are often known as gay. (The term gay is sometimes also used to describe homosexual individuals of both genders.)

Transgender People who changed from one gender to another and who are romantically and physically attracted to persons of their original gender or the same gender.

This type of imagining about people of the same or opposite sex doesn't necessarily mean that a person fits into a particular type of sexual orientation.

Some guys may also experiment with sexual experiences, including those with members of the same sex, during the years they are exploring their own sexuality.

These experiences, by themselves, do not necessarily mean that a person is gay or straight.

Am I gay?

Some guys often find themselves having sexual thoughts and attractions that are intense, confusing or disturbing. They may have romantic or sexual thoughts about someone who is the same sex they are.

"What does that mean," they might think.

"Am I gay?" Thinking sexually about both the same sex and the opposite sex is quite common as people sort through their emerging sexual feelings.

Others believe that it’s a combination of factors that determine one’s sexual attraction; such as biology, psychology, environment, genes and hormones.

No one knows for sure what causes or determines sexual orientation.

Stereotypes There are lots of opinions and stereotypes about sexual orientation that are hurtful to people of all orientations. For example, having a more "feminine" appearance, behaviour or interest does not mean that a guy is gay. And having a more "masculine" appearance doesn't mean a guy is straight.

As with most things, making assumptions just based on looks can lead to the wrong conclusions.

Remember Discrimination based on sexual orientation is not allowed under South Africa’s highest law, the Constitution. You must treat guys who are gay, straight, bisexual or transgender with the same respect and equality that you deserve.

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Acting against abuse &*$%! Voetsek! It is pretty common to hear four-letter swear words in school classrooms and playgrounds. Some guys want to be cool by cursing, swearing and using foul language. Some hear it from their parents and others mimic rap artists.

But McKay Hatch did not want to hear it!

When McKay was in grade 8, he asked his friends not to swear and curse around him.

Then he started a No Cursing Club.

It started with 35 members and grew to more than 20 000 members – kids and adults from 50 states in the United States of America and 30 countries joint.

The reaction has been mixed. McKay’s No Cursing Club’s website had been hacked, his family received death threats and prostitutes showed up at his house.

But, McKays mission of civility (politeness and good manners) kept him going!

Someone sent McKay an email and said ‘your words become your actions, action becomes your behaviour, your behaviour your character and character becomes your destiny’. This shows how much impact words have. McKay hopes that his No Cursing Club brings understanding amongst young people to show that words have meaning and can affect where you go in life!

McKay Hatch, 16, encourages children and adults to avoid using profanity.

Why don’t you start a No Cursing Club at your school! You can also become a member of McKay’s club. Check out his website; www.nocussing.com

The youngest headmaster in the world y In India (as in South Africa) many children are not getting an education because their families are too poor to send them to school. A 16-year-old boy decided to take matters into his own hands…

Babar Ali’s day starts early. He gets up, helps with the household chores, jumps on an auto rickshaw that takes him the first 10km, and then walks the last few to Roj Govinda School where he attends classes until the afternoons. The school is government-run so it is free - all Babar Ali has to pay for is his uniform, his books and the rickshaw ride. This still adds up to 1,800 rupees a year (R300) which is a lot of money in this part of West Bengal. Many poor families simply can't afford to send their children to school, even when it is free.

At four o'clock in the afternoon, when most of us kick back and relax, play sport outside or maybe start on our homework assignments, Babar rings a bell that summons all the kids in his neighborhood to his house - where he shares with them the lessons he heard from his teachers that day.

Babar was just 9 years old when he began teaching a few friends as a game.

Most of the kids that attend his classes work as domestic workers or field labourers during the day, to help support their families.

They were all eager to know what he learnt in school every morning.

Facts you need to know about the South African football team FIFA ranked South Africa 86th before the 2010 World Cup. Right behind Haiti! They are the lowest ranked team of the 32. But no worries. They're on home soil. Pride's on the line. We've got faith!

South Africa went to its first World Cup in 1998. In it they drew even against Denmark and Saudi Arabia, but got beaten by hosts France 3-0. Let's see if Bafana can return the favour. Watch out France!

South Africa has never gone beyond the First Round in its two previous appearances in the World Cup. Sad but true. In their second appearance in Korea and Japan in 2002, they beat Slovenia 1-0 (yes!), tied Paraguay 2-2 (hmmm), then lost to Spain 3-2 (nooo!). They had to pack up immediately. Back to the drawing board.

South Africa won the African Cup of Nations trophy in 1996. Here's that old hometown advantage thing again. South Africa hosted its first Africa Cup and kept the spoils. Even though Egypt got the drop on them in their early match, South Africa beat Cameroon, Angola, Algeria, Ghana, and finally Tunisia to lift the Cup. It was their most glorious victory yet. We're hoping for an even bigger one in 2010.

Benni McCarthy is South Africa's top scorer with 31 goals. A big personality, he's had numerous public spats with the national football organization and the revolving door of coaches. But as the most talented striker in the country, he's far too valuable to leave on the sidelines.

He plays for the Blackburn Rovers, but has also been with Ajax, Porto and Celta Vigo. He says he's gonna deliver for South Africa - we hope he does!

Aaron Mokoena, the captain, is also the most capped player with 92 caps. Known as Mbazo (The Axe), this centre-back has been with the national side since 1999. A member of the Portsmouth club, Mokoena is known as a tough tackler. We look forward to him showing his stuff on home soil.

What we love about our schools Cathkin High School

Cedar High School

Elsiesriver Secondary School

What I like about my school is the people (educators, learners, caretakers, tea lady, securities) Even though there are times when our personalities clash with one another we do laugh at each other, smile and talk to each other. I like that because it reminds me how human and real we are…!

-Nicholas “Nique-flke”, grade 11

Is that as the youth of the cape flats are born with such great talents and that my school provides talents to go forward in an academic way such as drama, design, dance and music, that’s what will drive our youth to success - Micheal Wicomb, grade 11

EK HOU VAN DIE IDEE DAT ONS SOOS ‘n code het wat almal volg. RESPEK, disspline en harder werk. Ek hou hiervan omdat dit in almal se guns tel en dit bring orde tot die skool. Sonder hierdie dinge is ons deur mekaar en onned. Ons is een van die beste skole in die omgewing en lewe goeie standade en leerders - Brandon Petersen, grade 10

Lavender Hill High School

Proteus Technical School

New Eisleben High School

I like the teachers at Lavender Hill School because they always inspire us to work harder when you fail a subject and I also like the activities our school have because they are good at every sport and when we see an opportunity we seize it.

- Cheslyn aka Papier & Gershwin Miller, grade 11

Proteus is ‘n skool met baie verskillende geleenthede. Die onderwysers doen alles in hul versmoëns om toe te sien dat ‘n leerder slag. My skool is een uit ‘n duisend. Dis die beeste skool in Atlantis. Ek hou ook van my skool se leuse energo (styg uit) - Malcolm Zimba, grade 9

Teachers who are dedicated at New Eisleben and committed to sharing with us the best education we can get as students. Also teachers help us as learners to realize our talents by involving us to participate in sports activities that takes place in my school -Siyavuya Gwadiso, grade 10

I love my school and this is because of the sense of togetherness and the bonds we have with our learners and teachers do their best to motivate and to get the learners to pass to the next grade and they do with love and no matter what!! We always emerge.!

TO THE TOP ,TOGETHER WE WILL ALWAYS RISE. - Marc Pululu, grade 10

Sinethemba High School

Luhlaza High School Izinto endizithandayo ngesikolo sam, eLuhlaza High School zezokuba iimisi ezizi miseleyo emsebenzi wazo ne egoyofumana yonke into elungileyo noxintywa ke Uniform ka kuhle - Athenkosi Mango, grade 11

What I like about my school are classmates, because they make me as their role model because I have discipline and other things are activities like drama, sport especially soccer, there are other things that I like about my school - Hilton Buhe, grade 10

Published by Molo Songololo, Physical Address: 46 Trill Road, Observatory, Cape Town, 7925 Telephone: (021) 448 5421 Fax: (021) 448 2421 Funded by Afrika Kontakt and Operation a Day’s Work from Denmark