Where Do We Go From Here?

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MENTAL HEALTH

Where Do We Go From Here?

WRITTEN BY LORI JO BERG

“I don’t want to share my toys with my friends, mama. I’ll get COVID from the germs and get sick. I could die.”

Whoa. That statement hit me hard coming from my 5-year-old kindergartener on our way to an outdoor playdate.

The worst part? I didn’t have a response. Not a single one. Every time I opened my mouth to say something, it didn’t sound quite right or good enough.

If you’re anything like me, you might feel like we’re living in limbo. Obviously, the pandemic is still rearing its ugly head, but glimpses of normal life are also appearing. Navigating between the two is tough.

So, where do we go from here?

My daughter’s statement still warrants a conversation as I ask myself the same question.

Do I take a deep dive into germs and let her know not all germs are bad? This seems like a poor response after everything they go through at school NOT to come into contact with any germs at all. Do I reassure her it’s OK not to share in a time like this? Navigating the death topic on top of it all is never easy and is especially tough right now.

Much like all things parenting, the questions come easily and the answers do not.

I’ve seen COVID-related issues (in kids and parents) ranging from fear of germs and noise to pure anxiety at the thought of leaving the house. I personally know a family who’s three preschoolers cry at the sight of someone other than mom or dad. After months of isolation, my 7-year-old is a different kid who now struggles with seemingly anything social. So, again: Where do we go from here?

After much thought, I’ve come to the conclusion that we’re going to have to fight and work hard every single day to retrieve what has been lost – whatever that may be for you and your family.

If it’s a fear of socializing, start small and keep at it. If it’s a fear of germs, find that healthy balance and identify a few good germs (i.e., playing in the dirt). If it’s a child who is behind at school, seek out help. Maybe it’s a tutor, a grandparent or a weekly summer reading group at the library.

I like to think of it as adding one small drop into the bucket every day, in hopes of filling it up over time.

And let’s not forget the positive things that have come out of this crazy time. Maybe your family hasn’t experienced ear infections, the common cold or the flu as they have in past years. Perhaps we all have a better awareness of how germs are spread and have become better at keeping our hands away from our faces. Maybe it’s something as small as your school-aged child not sucking their thumb or finger anymore with all that maskwearing. And how about the major upgrade on the cleanliness of public places?

Can your kids help you identify any other positive takeaways?

I don’t think anyone can tell us where we go from here, exactly. But I do know that we all have it within ourselves to adapt, learn and move forward.

As for me, I think I’ll start by asking my daughter a few questions and letting her take the lead on this one.

Lori Jo is a Montana native, mother of three, and freelance writer who enjoys writing about the tougher side of life and connecting with her audience on a deeper level.

MENTAL HEALTH

So, Yeah, I have a Mom Bod... Or Had!

WRITTEN BY CORA DESANTIS | PHOTOS COURTESY TRUE SPIRIT CROSSFIT

So, yeah, I have a mom bod. Three kids in five years while working full time or more left me exhausted and too tired to manage much more than dog walks. And the weight piled on, naturally, as that’s what birthing babies does to us. At my heaviest, during my third pregnancy, I was up to 235 pounds. When the kids got a little older, I started working out more with some aerobics and fitness classes, even instructing – but the weight still lingered. No matter how I hard I exercised, the baby fat/kangaroo pouch was still there.

This year, at age 47, I joined True Spirit Crossfit and Yoga. After 20 years as a parent, it was time to lay my excuses aside. True Spirit owner and head coach Leslie Allen were a breakthrough for me. I started doing more strength training and following nutrition guidance from Audi Butler. I had a rough start; I’m not going to lie. I had three surgeries in 2020, one knee and both wrists. So, I had a lot of physical therapy and a strong fear of re-injury. My knee repair didn’t take, but I have still been able to do Crossfit and have gotten stronger and increased my range of motion. Crossfit has been my physical therapy replacement and I’ve seen big gains. The best thing I can do for my knee is to keep the weight off.

So, Crossfit: I thought that was for meatheads and the military. I was wrong. There is a great team atmosphere where we all work together to see measurable improvements in our strength and health. And True Spirit is mostly women! Yes, there are barbells but Leslie held my hand the whole time – particularly with the injuries. I have learned new things like how to lift weights properly and do power lifting moves. I have built mental and physical toughness doing things I never thought I could.

The best part is the results. Small victories on the scale – I am currently at the lightest weight since having children 20 years ago even as I approach menopause. Only 12 pounds to go to that mark. But, more importantly, my BMI is down from 46 to 30 – a significant decrease from morbidly obese status. My clothes fit better than they have in a long time. And I feel great. I am headed to my 30th high school reunion this summer, and Leslie is helping me lose that last 12 pounds before then. Leslie’s got a plan and I believe her because she coached me through my own bad habits (mostly being consistent and my diet).

So, if this old cowgirl can do it, I know you can too. The decrease in fat around my midsection is making all the other kinds of things in life easier. Hiking, yoga, paddling, all those things we live for and make us feel better.

Stay tuned in the coming months for more small victories, regular habits and MOM BOD SUCCESSES!