Mental Health Doesn’t Have to Be Scary

WRITTEN BY LAUREN BUXBAUM

Autumn has finally arrived. Every year, I count the days until I can pull out my cozy sweaters and walk through fallen leaves, seeking that oh-so-satisfying crunch beneath my boots. However, fall lovers like me don’t just look forward to pumpkin spice lattes; we dream of the spooky season. We don our homes with spider webs, headstones and skeleton bones, buy pumpkins to carve into Jack-o’-lanterns and eat a little more candy than usual. A lot of things can be frightening during this season: stories of ghouls and goblins, Halloween costumes, decorations, maybe even a scary movie or two. However, what should not be scary is talking about our mental health.

Talking with your child about emotional topics like mental health can feel uncomfortable either because of a perceived stigma or lack of information. Unfortunately, people often blame mental health challenges on the person experiencing them, saying they aren’t trying hard enough or that they are doing something wrong. This can make a child feel like it is their “fault” when they are facing a mental health challenge.

Talking to your children about mental health is a great way to decrease the stigma and lack of understanding surrounding it. Like overcoming the fear of a monster under the bed, working together with your child to tackle something frightening can be challenging. Here are some helpful ways you can start the conversation to make mental health a little less scary.

Download Meet Little Monster Coloring & Activity Book

Perfect for the Halloween season, the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) created Meet Little Monster, a mental health coloring and activity book, which is available for download at no-cost in both English and Spanish. Meet Little Monster is a useful tool for helping children express their feelings in a fun, creative and empowering way. You can download this activity book on the NAMI website at www. nami.org.

I highly suggest printing one for yourself to complete alongside your child. Sometimes grown-ups must confront monsters too.

Make An Analogy to A Medical Problem

Children are used to talking about their medical problems. They understand that if they have a fever or cough, they need to take medicine to make them feel better. Similarly, you can let your child know that mental health concerns like anxiety, depression and ADHD are also physical conditions. Like a cough starts in your lungs, mental health concerns start with their brain. The brain controls feelings, thoughts and behaviors—kind of like the central headquarters of the body. Sometimes the brain needs a little help getting better. As with other medical problems, we may need a health professional or medicine to feel OK again.

Practice What You Preach

Whether or not you have a diagnosed mental illness yourself, everyone deals with feelings of anxiety, sadness and confusion. Sharing these feelings and the way you address them—whether it’s medication or jogging every morning—can help your child understand that difficult feelings are normal. The same way you share the importance of brushing teeth every day, share the importance of taking care of your mental health.

Talk Often

Like anything you do in life, talking about your feelings and emotions gets easier with practice. Don’t think of “talking about mental health” as something you do during an emergency. Make it part of your daily routine. Every day ask at least one question about your children’s feelings and emotions. Don’t force them to tell you. Just give them a chance to share. Questions can be simple, like: “Have you been feeling sad lately?” or “Do you ever feel afraid?”

Talking with your child about their mental health may be scary at first, but you are more than capable of starting the conversation. And like any occasion when you confront something frightening, you can always ask for help if you need it. Reach out to a trusted healthcare professional if you need additional support.

Lauren Buxbaum (she/her) is a Care Management Intern at Bridgercare.