M U M S For families with children from 0 to 11
Xmas gift guide New year resolutions
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D A D S
Winter 2023-24
M A G A Z •
Issue 82
Mind your manners
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Contents 04 Christmas gift guide 08 Preparing for tomorrow 10 Holiday survival strategy 12 Events Watch 21 Mind your manners 22 New year resolutions Editor Zoe Drobnis Art Editor David Aldred Issue 82 Winter 2023-24 Cover: sarahjanekingphotography.com Published by M&D Publishing Ltd All rights reserved. Reproduction without the express permission of the Editor is strictly prohibited. The opinions expressed within M&D Magazine are not necessarily the views of the publishers, but those of individual writers. The publishers accept no liability of any nature arising out of or in connection with the contents of this magazine.
M&D Magazine, 4 Granville Gardens, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2SX Tel: 0161 445 5388 editor@mums-dads.co.uk www.mums-dads.co.uk
A word from the editor Do you find this time of the year stressful or soothing? Are you aggrieved by the festive preparations or relieved by the thought of a long holiday? Does the idea of a family visit fill you with dread or delight? The festive season is coming - are you exhausted or excited? Either way, we’ve got you covered. There are thoughts from our seasoned reviewer Paul Wojnicki on presents for the whole family, as well as advice from Giddy Goat Toys - a local favourite - about the top ten gifts for kids this year (page 4-6). There’s reassurance that working parents can and will survive the school holidays, particularly if the grandparents are on hand to help (page 10). There is also our ever-so-helpful Events Watch to guide you through the myriad of festive entertainments, family pantos, and exciting shows (pages 12-15). Then when all that’s read and done, why not finish up by finding out how to make your New Year’s resolutions easier to keep (page 22). If, on the other hand, you’re one of our well prepared and extremely organized readers, and finished your Christmas chores back in September, why not get (even further) ahead and check out information about schools, nurseries, and extra-curricular activities waiting for you in 2024. We wish you a Merry Christmas, and a peaceful and happy year ahead! Zoe x
visit www.mums-dads.co.uk
Christmas Giſt Guide by Paul Wojnicki Is it just us, or does it get harder each year to choose Christmas presents? Well, we’ve got one solution for that – and it’s not giving the kids the latest Argos or Smyths catalogue and letting them circle everything they want Santa to bring. It’s M&D’s 2023 Christmas gift guide – and there’s even an idea in there for mum or dad’s gift too. Merry Christmas everyone!
festive fun
VTech Super Sound Karaoke Machine
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The Kindle Scribe When it comes to reading books on an electronic device, the Kindle Paperwhite has ruled supreme for well over a decade now, and the Fire tablets are great for kids. But for an avid reader and notetaker, the Kindle Scribe is the final word on tablet devices. It has the biggest screen you can find on a Kindle device - a whopping 10.2 inches - yet keeps the display razor sharp, so books and text look amazing, even in direct sunlight. But it’s the writing experience on the Scribe that really sets it apart, the surface of the screen has just the right amount of friction and actually feels like you’re writing on real paper as the tip of your stylus scribbles upon it - even the noise it makes sounds satisfyingly like pen on paper. It’s the perfect gift for anyone who loves reading, writing, doodling or ‘old fashioned’pen and paper games. Available from Amazon for £329.99 VTech Super Sound Karaoke Machine Everyone loves a singalong at Xmas, so why not give your yuletide crooning a bit of added oomph with a karaoke machine? You don’t have to splash out hundreds of pounds on a professional set either, the VTech Super Sound Karaoke is a perfectly functioning unit and is available from The Entertainer at a reduced price at the time of writing. All you need to do is connect your mobile phone or laptop via Bluetooth or cable and pick a song from YouTube.
If you can’t find an instrumental version of the song on YouTube then there’s a handy feature on the Super Sound Karaoke that removes the original vocals, so your own voice can take the lead instead. It also serves as a radio and portable speaker, complete with disco lights. Our eight-year-old loves hers and since it allows two microphones to be plugged in we get to murder Taylor Swift’s greatest hits together, much to our neighbours’ delight. On offer for £26.79 in The Entertainer Sharpin Arcade Cabinet
Switch and can therefore play new and old games alike. It’s ideal for the new Super Mario Wonder game and the arcade stick is full sized, unlike the ones on many mini cabinets. You can have fun building it together, and the push fit electronics are a great way to learn about circuit boards. It only takes around 30 minutes to assemble and there are also versions for Android phones and iPhones if you don’t own a Nintendo Switch. Available from digital-pinball.com for €179
their magic has returned to the North Pole for another year too. So, unwrapping Dobby the House Elf from Lego is an excellent way of keeping some elven magic in the house 365 days a year. We’ve had some great experiences building Lego together and developing problem solving skills (see the Star Wars Lego review on M&D’s website), and this Dobby set is a great introduction to the Lego brand, especially for Harry Potter fans. Retails for £24.99 from all major stores but currently on offer for £16.99 on Amazon.
Dobby the House Elf from Lego
Magic Mixies The multi-award-winning Magic Mixies toys have been one of the biggest hits
Mini versions of old arcade cabinets are all the rage these days, but the 1980s games are pretty dated and tend not to hold kids’ attentions, despite them loving the actual cabinets. Enter the Sharpin Arcade Cabinet is a flat packed As excited as kids always are to see arcade cabinet which houses a Nintendo Christmas Day, they’re often sad that
Flip a Zoo
Squishable plush toys are all the rage with younger kids these days and there are a dizzying amount of them to choose from. Flip a Zoo sets itself out from the crowd by providing not one but two 38cm mushable friends in every toy. One minute it’s a gorgeous giraffe, then simply flip the cover and it’s an adorable elephant. There are four different Flip a Zoos to collect, making eight adorable friends in total. They’re super soft, feel fantastic to the touch and make great cushions or pillows too. Available in Smyths and other stores for £16.99 Harry Potter Waffle Maker Not only are waffles delicious, but preparing and mixing batter is a great way to learn about measurements and how ingredients bind together.
Kids love preparing treats anyway but once you throw Harry Potter into the mix then you’ll never have any trouble tempting them into the kitchen. The die-cast aluminium plates on the inside are easy to clean and make a perfect impression of Harry's glasses every time. You’re not just limited to waffles either, throw on eggs, brownie mix, shredded potatoes, or even mini toasties. Available at 1001hobbies.co.uk for £29.99 Little Mermaid Mystical Cauldron The biggest film of the year for our eight-year-old daughter was the Little Mermaid live-action remake. Hardly a day goes past without Poor Unfortunate Souls being played to death on her tablet. Imagine her longing when the Little Mermaid Mystical Cauldron appeared on a YouTube advert. She was almost as desperate for it as Ariel is to be ‘Part of your World’. It’s every Disney-lover’s dream toy, especially if they love magic. You can pour water into the cauldron and watch it bubble, wave your hands over it to cast spells and activate lights and sounds, capture Ariel’s voice and transform her from a mermaid into a human by dipping her in the water. There are too many other features to list but, you guessed it, Poor Unfortunate Souls is one of them, as well as Ursula’s cackling laugh. These are bound to be among the most sought-after toys of 2024. Available at Argos for £50
festive fun
with kids for the past three years, and they don’t look like slowing down anytime soon. Their combination of special effects, super cute characters and interactive spell casting steps will delight younger children. This year, they’ve released a Magic Lamp in which you discover a ring and complete a spell to release the genie. Real mist blows out of the spout, and lights and sounds accompany the big reveal as the Mixie emerges from within. You can then interact with the Mixie using the magic ring and make a wish, but will it be granted? Around £45 from all major retailers.
Crayola Wixels Most children love arts and crafts but it’s a struggle finding genuinely innovative toys which encourage creativity. Crayola Wixels have found a novel way for kids to create colourful pixel art, while also learning how pixels make up digital pictures. The set includes two Wixlel boards, two templates and 8 washable marker pens. By placing the template over the Wixel board you see which colour to mark out on each Wixel. Once each Wixel is dotted with a colour you remove the template and hold the relevant coloured marker against the dot. The ink then wicks into the Wixel, creating a colourful masterpiece. They can be washed and reused and the ink is non-toxic. What I really love about these is that you can also use the pixels to create your own designs or see how pixels can be used to form letters or numbers. Retails for £24.99 but on offer at Very for £16.99 at the time of writing.
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The Giddy Goat Christmas Countdown top ten toys for 2023
Wooden Blocks
2 Squishmallows There are so many different characters to collect and in different sizes and with different prices. These have been popular all year round. £10.99 / £21.99 3 Wow Toys Ronnie Rocket Wow Toys are sturdy, hardwearing, toddler proof toys that don’t need batteries just imaginative minds. Ronnie Rocket has always been one of our best sellers as children love to zoom it around. £28.99 1-5 years.
Ronnie Rocket
Qwirkle
7 Qwirkle board game I am biased here because Qwirkle is our favourite board game and we have consistently played this for years and years. Available in regular size at £27.99 or travel size at £17.99 From 6 years+ Skeleton Dungeon
Squishmallows
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by Amanda Alexander of Giddy Goat Toys, Didsbury
festive fun
It’s that time of year again when magazines like to produce their Top Ten Christmas lists and these can be invaluable for giving us ideas for what to buy for the loved ones in our lives, especially those difficult to buy for relations or the friends who have everything. Buying for children is always much easier as there as so many FUN things to get and children love getting new fun things! In fact, there are so many new fun things available it can be challenging for parents to know just what toys to choose and this is an issue we face here at Giddy Goat HQ when we pick which products to stock in our shop. We want to have the ‘next big thing’ for our customers, but more than that we want toys with genuine play value, which won’t be discarded on Boxing Day and which we feel are value for money. We visit toy fairs, we speak to sales representatives, we scour catalogues and we read the trade press as part of the process of researching what to stock. We also listen to our customers and so whilst we don’t have the room to stock everything we have a very full shop rammed with all the latest goodies as well as the traditional toys and games that are a staple of many toy boxes and our Top Ten Christmas list is a mix of new and traditional and this year, mindful as we are of the cost of living crisis, we have tried harder than ever to make sure the toys on our list and in our shop are value for money and will be played with all year round. 1 Wooden Blocks Hours of creativity and fun to be had with this toy box staple - perfect for older babies and toddlers and great for improving manual dexterity, hand eye co-ordination and creative skills. £19.99 for a sturdy tub of wooden blocks in different shapes, sizes and colours.
Lego Up House
Picnic Van
4 Sylvanian Families Picnic Van Syvlanian families are enduring in popularity with many parents telling us they still have the Sylvanian families they had as children. Collectible and great for imaginative play with the Family Picnic Van being a lovely set for children to take their Sylvanian friends for pretend picnic. £33.99 3-10 years 5 Gabby’s Dollhouse Doll Gabby’s Dollhouse is an animated children’s series which is hugely popular with both girls and boys and the eponymous doll is bound to be sought after this year. £19.99 3-7 yrs.
8 Lego Up House Possibly on a fair few adults’ Christmas wishlists, the Lego Up House is a fantastic set with 598 pieces. £59.99 8 years + 9 Lego Minecraft Skeleton Dungeon Lego Minecraft is still hugely popular and we have lots of different sets in stock - we chose this one as it came in at under £30 and it includes 3 Skeleton Minifigures plus weapons and a cave. £26.99 8 years+ 10 Toniebox and Tonies Tonieboxes are audio speaker systems aimed at encouraging active listening in children and Tonies are figurines with audio content (songs or stories) on them. New Tonies characters are released monthly allowing children to build up beautiful audio libraries. One of our best sellers and the starter set includes a Toniebox plus a creative Tonie figure for you, or members of the family, to record your own stories onto. £79.99 Suitable from birth.
Gabby’s Dollhouse Doll Toniebox & Tonies
6 Fingerlings These colourful interactive monkeys were huge a few years back and were one of those toys that were all but impossible to get hold of. They’re back this year with new features are more interactive and responsive than ever. Different characters to choose from. £19.99 3-10 years.
We’ve got toys and games for kids of all ages plus a huge range of stocking fillers both online and in our Didsbury shop. We’re looking forward to helping you and Santa choose the perfect presents this year. Amanda and the Giddy Goat team x Fingerlings
Visit the shop at 2 Albert Street • Didsbury Manchester M20 6RF call 0161 445 1097 or shop online at www.giddygoattoys.co.uk
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Pottery Corner Chorlton
Stagecoach Performing Artss is the trading name of Stagecoach Theatre Arrts Limited. Stagecoach Theatre Arts schools are operated under franchise and are independently owned by the eir Principals. Stagecoach and Creative Courag ge For Life are registered trademarks of Stagecoach Theatre Arts Limited.
potterycorner.co.uk 0161 882 0010
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Today’s children need extra skills to be ready for the future; we’re living in a time of rapid change so that will likely involve jobs not currently in existence, and technologies not yet created. Looking after their health early on is central to their wellbeing later in life. Early Years professionals are calling for active outdoor play to be prioritised and more time spent in nature - particularly wild countryside - to address concerns about the growth in children’s mental health issues. M&D Magazine asked Rachael Lyons, the Operations Manager at Elmscot Group Nurseries, about her experience in helping children to get ready for the future. “In our nurseries we’re lucky to be able to offer children the best of both a traditional and forest nursery. The nurseries’ idyllic locations, close to the Cheshire countryside, enable easy access to local wild spaces. Where better to practice balancing than along a tree trunk in the woods? What better way to understand the life cycle than enjoying seasonal changes each time they visit their local forest or field? At Elmscot, we’re trying to create magical experiences, such as
going on a bear hunt or creating woodland clay creatures, developing the children’s imagination and love of the natural world. As well as having lots of fun, they’re being exposed to a far more diverse range of stimulating first-hand learning experiences than can be accessed within the nursery environment alone. “We believe that time in the wild is invaluable for open-ended exploring, active learning through play, developing imagination, creativity and curiosity, collaborating, thinking critically and problem solving. The wild is full of unexpected outcomes, which Elmscot children learn to take in their stride. If the den they built falls down, they simply start again, adapting their method - naturally building resilience, confidence and self-esteem along the way. Their high-quality waterproofs, provided by the nursery, ensure that rain never stops play either. “Spending so much time in nature, the children want to protect it, hence activities like walking to nursery, litter picking and tree planting are natural choices for them. All our nurseries are involved with local communities by supporting food banks, visiting care homes or decorating Christmas trees. This helps the children to make sense of the world around them, and develop empathy, kindness and a sense of belonging. The nurseries’ turtle bus pushchairs make accessing the wild and the local communities easier and safer. The children love riding in them - sitting opposite each other, they can easily talk to friends, and get in and out through a side door, just like in a real bus. “The outdoor experiences which our kids have are perfectly complemented with time back at nursery this includes getting involved with music, dance, art, woodwork, cooking and sports. We’re also getting them ready for school by developing key proficiencies
such as numeracy, literacy, and fine motor skills. And, of course, we are proud to be repeatedly recognised as providers of the best nursery food in the UK, all prepared using fresh, locally-sourced ingredients. Our menus are approved by a registered dietician, and are healthy as well as exposing the children to the most amazing foods and flavours. “Last but not least, we strongly encourage parents to be closely involved in the life of the nursery. Parents’ sessions and regular updates from the child’s key worker are essential tools in our communication strategy.
Ruth Hetherington
expert advice
Preparing today’s children for tomorrow
“We are proud to have won multiple national awards - Ofsted Outstanding, Day Nurseries Top 20 and Millie’s Mark to name just a few. We are delighted that our nurseries come highly recommended by parents. But the most important thing for us is that our children can’t wait to go to nursery each morning!”
How to parent peacefully parents that children do need both of them. They have grown up with both since birth and need both going forward. The parents may have divorced each other but they are not divorced from their children. My advice is to always have the question of what is right for the children at the fore front of your mind. If, for example, dad asks for an additional day to watch a football match that happens to be on your day, then go with it. If mum wants to attend a girls’ pamper party on a day that falls on dads’ weekend, then go with it. This is putting the children first and also showing them that life is about compromise.
4 Don’t create the “divorce kid” environment My daughter often says to me that she knows the kids at school whose parents are divorced because they come in loaded up with bags. This comment has never left me, so I have worked with my ex to ensure that our kids are not loaded up when going to school. With a little planning, this can work. Also, as tough as it may be, try to attend school functions, plays and parents’ evenings together. Attending separately and sitting at opposite sides of the school hall not only reminds children that their family is separated, but also announces it to their school world. It also helps deal with any negative feedback from teachers and if needs be, it helps with enforcement of the same rules in both households.
As a children lawyer and divorced parent of two, I often get asked questions such as ‘does shared care really work’, ‘does it not cause confusion to the children’, ‘how do they adapt to two homes’ and ‘can it work if we simply do not get on’. For most, the view has already been formed that peaceful co-parenting only happens in Disney films, in the Gwyneth Paltrow household or the Hamptons. The reality is it can happen and does happen, but it takes determination by both parties to get it right. If you do, the rewards can be life changing. Children grow up feeling they can talk to you both without barriers, can celebrate their love for you both openly and, more importantly, that you can enjoy all of this as a unit, just a different one. There are many breakups where for a number of reasons, co-parenting is not possible, but for those where there are no welfare concerns and there is a genuine desire to work together to get it right, these tips should help. 1 It is about the children’s wishes and feelings not the adults’. The focus should always be on what is right for the child. When parents split, they often put their own positions first. In my initial meetings I often hear the words ‘I must have every weekend’, ‘he can see them every other weekend’ or ‘it has to be full fiftyfifty’. I have to dial back the emotion and remind
Children need routine whatever their age. This is even more so when they are living in two households. I often get asked what the right co-parenting routine is. The reality is, there is no right or wrong. Children do not come with a manual. They are all different. A week on, week off routine may work for some children but not others. My own children have a routine which involves them staying with dad Thursday to Monday one week, then Wednesday and Thursday the following week. We did not even try the week on, week off approach as we both knew that this would be too much for our son who prefers shorter blocks. Whilst our arrangement is not exactly fifty-fifty, it is as good as and works. A good tip is to have a calendar on the fridge door marking mum and dad days. Children can then see when they are next seeing the other parent which takes away any worries or anxiety that they may have. Holidays will also need to be planned in advance, with both parents giving notice to each other. The best arrangements tend to be those that alternate the holidays each year, so children create memories of different seasons with both parents.
To summarise, co-parenting is not easy. It takes patience, understanding and resilience. I have been co-parenting now for seven years. We did not get it all right, but we applied the above rules and have now come out of on other side. The greatest irony is that our children are now teenagers and do not want to spend time with either of us - we are just mum and dad, and we are both uncool.
expert advice
2 Routine, respect, and planning in advance When parents separate, they are entering into an unknown world. Ever since their children were born, they have never had to adhere to the timetable of a single parent. In most modern families, tasks would have been divided with one parent doing feed time and the other bed and bath.
3 Aim for a business relationship. Tensions between parents can get high and this is often exacerbated by unhelpful communication. The preponderance of communication apps is dangerous territory for parents in conflict. My advice – see your ex as a business partner akin to a work colleague and this should change the way you communicate with each other. This will also have the benefit of facilitating how you talk about the other parent to the children as it takes away the emotion.
by Amanda McAlister
Managing Partner of McAlister Family Law
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by Beth SafferMatthews
viewpoint
Survival strategy for happy holidays
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When you have children, you can never predict what challenges you might face. The interesting thing is finding out how quickly you can adapt. Our daughter, Saffy, finally started her educational journey in September at a lovely school - Lum Head Primary, less than 5 minutes from our home in Gatley. She knew a few other children already, and since it’s a one-form entry school, with not too many other children and lots of support from the teachers and Teaching Assistants, the transition for her has been very easy. For us as parents, it was a bigger adjustment, especially in having to be more organised. Gone are the days of being 5-10 minutes late for Nursery due to rough nights and breakfast tantrums - there is now a ten-minute
window between the school doors opening and having to report late at the main office. And despite living so close, somehow we end up almost being late rather too often. We flew through the first term by the seat of our pants. Saffy is already reading short words, has made lots of friends (“5 is enough” she frequently tells us), and after some initial hesitation is comfortable enough at the after school club. I’ve enjoyed the social side of meeting other parents, particularly as I work remotely and find the opportunity to talk to actual people in person rather than on Zoom refreshing.
When the first holiday came round, Saffy seemed rather put out, and we had to wrestle her uniform off her on the Monday morning, as she seemed concerned about missing school. I was ready to drive past the school building to show her it really was closed, when she finally accepted the ‘tough reality’ of having a holiday. Without the structure of school for a week we, the working parents, were also a bit lost: how to juggle work commitments and looking after Saffy and her younger brother, how to entertain the older one, and whether to take the younger one away from the nursery so they could spend time together. Luckily, it was grandparents to the rescue, and we ended up with a fool-proof plan: me taking Monday off, grandparents covering Tuesday to Thursday, and husband taking over on Friday. We survived our first school holiday, realised that planning ahead is essential, and I’m ready to offer my top 5 amateur’s tips to the parents who haven’t experienced their first time yet. • Don’t feel too pressured to do anything amazing or expensive, every day - going to places like Legoland and the cinema, the costs can easily rack up. A good break from learning and school routine is a much needed thing in itself. Saffy enjoyed not having to get dressed early, lazing about in her dressing gown, and taking it a bit easier before going outside and enjoying the outdoors - a walk, a bus ride, or trip to the park to kick through the leaves. There are also tons of places with ‘kids eat free’ offers to help you make the cash go further.
• If you have younger children in nursery - keep them in on their regular days where possible. Perhaps sounds a bit selfish, but it was so lovely to have a full day just me and Saffy for some quality one to one time. We enjoyed a visit to the Science and Industry Museum and a trip on the tram. A trip to Nixon’s Farm and joining the Popcats music class in Didsbury (thank you, grandparents!) took care of two more days. • If you do want to do activities, check which events are happening locally and book something in advance (your copy of M&D Magazine is great for forward planning). • Let grandparents know that you need their help well before the school break starts. Do not let them go on holiday that week! • Tell your partner the dates of the school holiday. Text them. Write on their hand. Call their boss . Then take a deep breath when they tell you, they didn’t know it was half term.
www.mummyandtheos.co.uk Clothes and accessories to suit tiny boys and girls from preemies to 3 month olds
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out and about
Events Watch
photo: Tatton Park Christmas Mansion
Christmas to celebrate traditions old and new. Different rooms in the hall will be decorated to transport you to Christmas past, from Tudor to present day, all within a few steps. Visitors to the hall will not only be entertained by a jovial jester but will also be treated to the musical talents of either Merrie Noyse or Piva; groups of performers who bring the music of the past to life. Little Moreton Hall, Newcastle Road, Congleton, Cheshire, CW12 4SD
December - 3 January Christmas Bricktacular at LEGOLAND Discovery Centre This Christmas at LEGOLAND Discovery Centre, take part in a scavenger hunt in the winter wonderland themed MINILAND®, build a cool LEGO decoration and display it for others to see, rock around the LEGO Christmas tree at the pop-up dance parties with the LEGO mascots and you can even spin the advent wheel and see what number it lands on to win a treat! On selected dates (2-3, 9-10, 16-24 December ) there is also the option to visit LEGO Santa in his grotto – this costs an additional £5 and includes the opportunity have a souvenir photo taken with the brick man himself and receive a gift. LEGOLAND® Discovery Centre Manchester Trafford Palazzo, The Trafford Centre, M17 8AS.
1, 8, 15 Dec. 9:30 - 16:40 30 minute session 21 Dec. 13:30 - 16:40 30 minute session 22 Dec. 10: 10 - 16:40 30 minute session Baby and toddler festive play session with Father Christmas The magic of Christmas with a festive play, activity session, and a special visit from Father Christmas. This session will include an interactive story /song, a keepsake craft for you to take home, and toys for the children to play with. Father Christmas will make a special visit, giving each child a gift and there will be an opportunity to take a photo with the man himself. This event is designed for children aged 6 months - 5 years, however older children are welcome. Quarry Bank, Styal, Wilmslow, Cheshire, SK9 4LA Tel: 01625 527468 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/quarry-bank
December - 4 January Outdoor ice rink
1 - 24 December 11:00 -15:00 (last entry) Animal Crackers Christmas at Lyme Step into an imagined house where Christmas has been interrupted by an animal takeover. Seeking refuge from extreme rain, the house becomes home to a menagerie of magnificent and unusual beasts. Christmas starts with a bang as the carnival comes to Lyme. Leave your brolly at the door and join in the Christmas revelry with a host of amazing animals. During your visit you can collect any miss-laid eggs, relax with cows, and enjoy Karaoke with badgers, all while enjoying the historic house dressed up for a traditional Lyme Christmas. Join in the theatrical fun as Animal Crackers takes you on a self-guided visual journey of mischievous merrymaking through the house designed by The Strange Train Company. Lyme Park, Disley, Stockport, Cheshire, SK12 2NR Tel: 01663 762023 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/lyme
Get in the festive spirit with Skate Manchester. The outdoor ice rink will be in the heart of the city at Cathedral Gardens. Everyone is welcome, bring your loved ones and book your session for a winter wonderland journey on ice. Glide through the ice path and admire the glorious Christmas tree right on the rink. Rain or shine the covered ice rink is open, so you to enjoy your skating experience whatever the weather, without getting soaked in a sudden, very British downpour! The Cathedral Gardens, Manchester M4 3BG. www.skatemanchester.com 1, 2 Dec. 10am - 8pm / 3 Dec. 10am - 4pm Tatton Park Christmas Gift Fair Get ready to kick off the holiday season with the ultimate Christmas shopping experience at Tatton Park! This year, you are offered a unique opportunity to explore the Tenants Hall inside the stately mansion house, which is not usually open to the public. As you step inside, you'll be greeted by a festive atmosphere, twinkling lights, and a variety of local suppliers selling everything from jewellery to candles and from crafts to gin. With so many different vendors, you're guaranteed to find the perfect gifts for everyone on your list. Plus, you'll get great ideas for presents that you won't find in your typical high street shops! Tatton Park, Knutsford, Cheshire WA16 6QN Tel: 01625 374400 www.tattonpark.org.uk
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1 -3, 8 -10, 15-17 December 11:00 - 15:30 Christmas at Little Moreton Hall Little Moreton Hall steps back in time this
1-3, 8-10, 15-17, 27-28, 27-31 Dec. 12 - 4pm Welcome to Wonderland Christmas Mansion
Follow Alice’s footsteps through the Duchess’ Garden, the Queen of Hearts’ grand palace, and on through the amazing Magic Forest. Marvel at the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party and dance the Lobster Quadrille before entering the Queen of Hearts’ kitchen to pick up your festive tasty treat. Be entertained by charming characters along the way and enjoy the festive illuminated displays that take over the state rooms and servants quarters this Christmas. Price: Adult £14.00, Child (3 and over) £12.00, Child 2 and under free. Tatton Park, Knutsford, Cheshire WA16 6QN Tel: 01625 374400 www.tattonpark.org.uk
1-31 December 10:30 - 16:00 1-7 January 10:30 - 16:00 12 days of Quarry Bank Christmas Delight as your little ones follow the new festive trail exploring Quarry Bank Christmas both past and present.Find the 12 days of Quarry Bank Christmas across the property and fill in your festive song sheet. Enter the competition for a chance to win a hamper of Quarry Bank treats. Trails are £2 each from Visitor Reception. Quarry Bank, Styal, Wilmslow, Cheshire, SK9 4LA Tel: 01625 527468 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/quarry-bank 2-3, 9-10, 16-17, 21-14 Dec. 11:00 - 16:00 Santa at your Planet Ice Join Planet Ice for a magical Christmas experience this December: Skate, meet Santa and his elves, receive a special gift. Skate & See Santa’ Package Includes: Corresponding Public Ice Skating Session for the Child, Meet Santa & his Elves, receive a Gift from Santa, Santa & his Elves will read the children a Christmas Story. Price: £22 per child Oakfield Road, Station Site, Altrincham, WA15 8EW. Tel: 0161 926 8782 www.planet-ice.co.uk/skate-and-see-santa 2- 3, 9-10, 16-17, 22-24 Dec. 10:30 - 14:30 Father Christmas at the Farm
A holiday favourite, families can see Father Christmas and his elf helpers in a festive grotto at the Farm. Enjoy roaming entertainers, live music with festive choirs and brass bands and stop off for a tasty treat in the Christmas Cafe. Don't forget to take your photo in Santa’s sleigh and make your own magical reindeer food in the Mill to take home and sprinkle around on Christmas Eve Price: Adult £10.00, Child £12.00 Tatton Park, Knutsford, Cheshire WA16 6QN Tel: 01625 374400 www.tattonpark.org.uk
join in with, so bring your best singing voices! The evening concert (only) also includes a tour of the mansion house. Price: Matinee: £21 | U18s £11 Evening: £28 | U18s £18 (includes mansion tour) Tatton Park, Knutsford, Cheshire WA16 6QN Tel: 01625 374400 www.tattonpark.org.uk 9 December 10:00 - 13:00 Christmas Craft Fair There will be stalls with: handmade crafts, cakes and hot drinks. Plus games and activities including: a tombola, a raffle, guess the weight of the cake, guess the name of the Teddy, guess the number of sweets in the jar. Proceeds will be donated to Optimal support, who provide mental health and well-being support. Adswood Community Centre, 231 Garners Lane Adswood, Stockport, SK3 8QJ. T: 0161 483 2513 9 December 11:00 -15:00 Stockport Art Gallery artisan market Celebrating Stockport Town of Culture, this festive market will showcase the work of over 40 local makers and traders. There will be all sorts of inspiration for Christmas. Expect to find: perfect presents, unique decorations, foodie treats. Support local, talented makers and know you're supporting your community! There will also be activities for children, including: a close-up magician, face painting Stockport War Memorial Art Gallery Greek Street, Stockport, SK3 8AB www.stockport.gov.uk/topic/stockport-warmemorial-art-gallery 11-4, 8-11, 15-18, 22 December 10: 00 - 14:30 30-minute session Seasonal Stories: Jolly Robin's Christmas Party Join in the fun this Christmas with a very merry, interactive storytelling adventure! Celebrate with Jolly Robin and their woodland friends at their festive party. Enjoy 30 minutes of storytelling and fun! Each child will receive a party bag including festive shaped crayons, colouring sheet, set of Jolly Robin stickers, and a hanging ornament to decorate at home. Price: Child: £8 Dunham Massey, Altrincham, Greater Manchester, WA14 4SJ. Tel: 0161 941 1025 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/dunham-massey
6,10, 13 December 11:00 - 15:30 Bramall Hall elf trail The elves are up to their old tricks! Bramall Hall is beautifully decorated for Xmas, which means our cheeky elves have moved in once again! Discover our Christmas critters and earn yourself a festive little treat. Snippet, Cranberry and Squire are just a few of our tinsel troublemakers that are looking forward to seeing you! Recommended for children aged 3 and up. Bramall Hall, Hall Rd, Bramhall, Stockport, SK7 3NX. www.stockport.gov.uk/events
15 December 19:30 - 21:00 Carols in the Courtyard Wrap up warm and come to Bramall Hall courtyard for carols around the Christmas tree, led by The Gallery Choir. The courtyard will be lit with fairy lights to create a wonderful ambiance. Bring a camping chair, a blanket, a lantern, or some fairy lights. Please note, no seating is provided. Each ticket also includes a chance to view beautifully decorated for Christmas Bramall Hall before the concert, plus a mince pie and a glass of warm mulled wine in the interval. An event guaranteed to evoke the spirit of Christmas for all that take part! Price: £10 Bramall Hall, Hall Rd, Bramhall, Stockport, SK7 3NX. www.stockport.gov.uk/events
8 December 15:30 - 17:00, 19:00 - 21:00 Northern Chamber Orchestra Christmas Concert Join the Northern Chamber Orchestra for its annual Xmas Concert in the grand Tenants’ Hall. Expect festive favourites, readings and carols, sung by the Choir of St Nicholas Catholic High School, Northwich. There will also be carols to
17 December 15:00 - 16:00 Christmas Carols in the Stableyard Meet with friends and family, pick up your song sheet and join the sing-along to Christmas favourites with the King Edward Musical Society Band and choir in the twinkling Stableyard. Tatton Park, Knutsford, Cheshire WA16 6QN Tel: 01625 374400 www.tattonpark.org.uk
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out and about
out and about
Events Watch
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21 December 09:30-10:00, 10:50-11:20, 12:10-12:40 22, 23 December 09:30 - 10:00 A Quiet Visit with Father Christmas Neurodiverse Friendly These sessions will host fewer guests, no music will be played, with fewer people around. The relaxed atmosphere will give ticket holders the opportunity to explore as they'd like in their own time. These sessions are open to guests of any age who have additional needs. Please purchase a Father Christmas ticket for each child/attendee that wishes to receive a gift. Two adults/carers per family group permitted to attend with the ticket holder. Quarry Bank, Styal, Wilmslow, Cheshire, SK9 4LA Tel: 01625 527468 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/quarry-bank
2 December at 11:00 is a relaxed and BSL interpreted performance. Price: £14-£16 Waterside Arts Centre, 1 Waterside Plaza, Sale, M33 7ZF. T: 0161 912 5616 www.watersidearts.org
1-21 January 10:00 - 16:00 Jolly Robin's Winter Walk Join Jolly Robin for a mood boosting, warming walk across the Dunham Massey Park this winter. Follow the trail to help Jolly Robin find their song and put a spring back in their step! With sparkling frost, life-giving rain and the opportunity to make boots muddy, winter can be lots of fun. Pull on your coat, embrace the cold and enjoy the sensory delights of the season. Find out top winter facts, wander past historical buildings and ancient trees. Don’t forget to stop for some deer spotting, and enjoy a hot drink in the restaurant or café when little legs tired. Ideal for under 8s but can be enjoyed by any age. Dunham Massey, Altrincham, Greater Manchester, WA14 4SJ. Tel: 01619411025 www.nationaltrust.org.uk/dunham-massey
8 December 1 January 13:00 Cinderella You shall go to the ball, Cinderella! Working all day long, completing chores and being taunted by her ugly stepsisters is all Cinderella has ever known, that is until her Fairy Godmother makes all her wishes come true… Join incredible cast for another year of wonderful music, the finest comedy routines and a sprinkle of Christmas magic. It’s a pantomime for the whole family to enjoy! Autism-friendly performance: Wednesday 13 December 5.30pm. Buxton Opera House, Water Street, Buxton, Derbyshire, SK17 6XN. Tel: 0845 127 2190 www.buxtonoperahouse.org.uk
Pantos and Shows 1 - 30 December The Snow Queen
At the top of the world lives the Snow Queen who is supposed to control the weather. But the seasons aren’t behaving. The world is getting warmer. And it hasn’t snowed for years... Lumi gazes up at the stars and worries about the world. The adults don't seem to have noticed that the seasons aren’t behaving, or that it hasn’t snowed for years. This is an emergency! So, it’s time to take the issue straight to the top (of the world) and find the Snow Queen she has heard so much about... On the long journey ahead she’ll meet a host of fabulous new friends - from an overworked elf, to a pompous polar bear - as she learns that small changes make a big difference! But first she is determined to make it SNOW! This vibrant musical re-telling of The Snow Queen is reimagined in an exciting adventure for the whole family. Created sustainably in every possible way by Wrongsemble. Wrongsemble are a Yorkshire based theatre company famed for creating fantastic family theatre for all ages, packed full of original music, magic and adventure. The Snow Queen promises to be a theatrical treat not to be missed for ages 4-104.
3 December 12pm Hallé Family Christmas Concert An enormous Christmas present has been found in The Bridgewater Hall. What could it be? Who is it for? Join the Hallé and presenter Tom Redmond as they unwrap a magical Christmas adventure with a gift that just keeps giving... Ticket Information: £27.50 full price / £17.50 children (aged 16 and under) / £69.50 family (any 4 people, including at least one child) The Bridgewater Hall, Lower Mosley St, Manchester M2 3WS. www.halle.co.uk/event/ halle-family-christmas-concert
8 December - 7 January Peter Pan It’s time to take flight to The Plaza for Stockport’s Swashbuckling Family Pantomime Adventure Peter Pan starring Brian Capron as the ‘oh so evil’ Captain Hook! With a sensational cast, spectacular costumes and magnificent scenery, this is the affordable family treat that everyone can enjoy this festive season. BSL Interpreted Performances - Saturday 9th December at 7.30pm & Thursday 14th December at 10.30am and 2.30pm The Plaza, Mersey Square, Stockport, Cheshire, SK1 1SP. Tel: 0161 477 7779 www.stockportplaza.co.uk 8, 9 December Comedysportz Improvised Pantomimes For Kids Age 7+ 8 December 19:00 / 9 December 16:30, 18:30 Price £7.50 / £5.50 For Tots Age 6 & under 9 December 14:30 Price £5.00 / £3.00 Heroes, villains, songs and silliness are guaranteed as the gang improvise a brand-new pantomime using only your suggestions and a sprinkling of fairy dust. The performers don’t know their roles beforehand and might even get you involved in the action! Waterside Arts Centre, 1 Waterside Plaza, Sale, M33 7ZF. T: 0161 912 5616 www.watersidearts.org 12 December 13:00, 19:00 Wizard of Oz This season, Planet Ice present a fun filled version of the Wizard of Oz adapted by the Show & Skate class of amateur skaters and supported by their Professional on Tour cast. This is an ultimate Classic for the entire family to enjoy. You will journey with Dorothy, Toto, and much-loved characters through a story of how you can transform yourself and others, for the better
through generosity, kindness, and compassion. You’ll be transported you into Oz with some of your favourite songs, amazing lighting production and beautiful on ice skate performances. This show has something for everyone and will leave you with that warm fun filled feeling. Price for Block Seating: Adult £13.50, Child £10.50 Oakfield Road, Station Site, Altrincham, WA15 8EW. Tel: 0161 926 8782 www.iceaccount.co.uk/ice-events/altrincham
22 Dec. 4pm 23 Dec. 11am and 1.30pm The Snowman with Live Orchestra
12- 15 December 10:00, 12:00, 14:00 (30-40 minutes, no interval) Little Penguin’s First Christmas A must for all the family. Watch Raymond Briggs’ classic animated film accompanied by the Hallé performing Howard Blake’s magical score. Ticket Information: £27.50 full price / £17.50 children (aged 16 and under) / £69.50 family (any 4 people, including at least one child). The Bridgewater Hall, Lower Mosley St, M2 3WS www.halle.co.uk/event/the-snowman
Colour The Clouds Theatre Company are delighted to present, ‘Little Penguin’s First Christmas’, an immersive, festive experience for babies aged 036 months and their grown-ups! Filled with puppetry, original music and sensory delights to stimulate and captivate, this show is a perfect first theatrical experience for your tiny one. Join Little Penguin in her winter wonderland as she discovers the magic of her first Christmas. Price: £16 one adult + one baby Waterside Arts Centre, 1 Waterside Plaza, Sale, M33 7ZF. Tel: 0161 912 5616 www.watersidearts.org 12 December - 6 January Lost and Found This winter, Factory International invites you to come on an epic journey to the South Pole and join a boy’s quest to help a lost penguin find its way home. In a heart-warming adaptation of Oliver Jeffers’ Lost and Found, adapted for the stage by renowned children’s TV and theatre producer Will Brenton, featuring original music by Gruff Rhys. Featuring puppetry and projections, a cast of characters that charm and delight, not to mention a gang of rowdy seagulls - expect to laugh and be moved by this magical new stage show for children and grown-ups. Aviva Studios, Water St, M3 4JQ www.factoryinternational.org/whats-on/lostand-found 16 - 24 December 10:00 13:30 16:00 17 December 10:00 AUTISM-FRIENDLY Relaxed performance / 24 December 10:00 BSL INTERPRETEDBSL performance Hare & Tortoise A musical play for 3-8 year olds and their families. Hare is always in a rush. Tortoise likes to take things more gently. Hare wants to race, Tortoise would prefer to go on holiday... Enjoy this beautiful reworking of Aesop’s famous fable as you’ll travel through the seasons with these two unlikely but loveable friends and help them prepare for their big race. This exciting play, especially designed for our younger audience, is a perfect introduction to theatre. Buxton Opera House, Water Street, Buxton, Derbyshire, SK17 6XN. Tel: 0845 127 2190 www.buxtonoperahouse.org.uk
14 January 14:00 Sing-a-Long-a Matilda the Musical Calling all revolting children and their parents come and be a little bit naughty at Sing-a-Long-a Matilda the Musical from the producers of Singalonga Sound of Music and Singalonga The Greatest Showman. Our host will help you have “a holiday in your head” as they teach you some dance moves, show you how to use your free props bags and have you booing the villains and championing the heroes. Note this is a screening of the movie not a live stage show. The Plaza, Mersey Square, Stockport, Cheshire, SK1 1SP. Tel: 0161 477 7779 www.stockportplaza.co.uk 25 February, 12 pm Hallé Family Concert: The Musical Story of Romeo and Juliet Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet is one of the most famous stories ever written and the Hallé, with the help of presenter Tom Redmond, will take you through Prokofiev’s exciting Romeo and Juliet Suite. Ticket Information: £22.50 full price / £12.50 children (aged 16 and under) / £49 family (any 4 people, including at least one child) The Bridgewater Hall, Lower Mosley St, Manchester M2 3WS. www.halle.co.uk/event/the-musical-story-ofromeo-and-juliet
The M&D Out and About listings are always carefully selected to offer our readers useful information. Although every effort is made to ensure that information is correct M&D cannot be held liable for any errors or omissions. We strongly advise you to check details with the event organisers.
Julia & Axel: thirty years of favourite stories
The Lowry in Salford has welcomed the 100,000th visitor to its record-breaking free exhibition that celebrates the much-loved 30-year picture book partnership between Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler. Julia and Axel: Thirty Years of Favourite Stories celebrates the much-loved and longstanding collaboration between writer Julia Donaldson and illustrator Axel Scheffler (The Gruffalo, Zog, Room on the Broom, The Highway Rat, The Smeds and the Smoos, Stick Man and many more) and was curated by The Lowry in collaboration with publishers Alison Green Books, Scholastic Children’s Books and Macmillan Children’s Books. The exhibition celebrates Julia and Axel’s brilliantly creative partnership and how this has developed over 30 years and has been visited by record-breaking numbers since it opened in June. October half term saw the milestone of 100,000 visitors passed when 6-year-old Maggie Lockett from Greater Manchester visited the exhibition with her mum. Maggie was presented with a Julia & Axel goodie bag that included a signed copy of The Gruffalo. Michael Simpson, Director of Visual Arts at The Lowry says: “We have loved having so many children in the galleries over the last few months, and it’s been especially fun to have lots of families coming back many times! Julia and Axel are such lovely people and have been so supportive every step of the way. And the good news is we have a couple more surprises up our sleeve for Christmas so lots more to still look forward to and enjoy before the exhibition ends.”
Axel Scheffler says: “The Lowry exhibition is a wonderful family experience and I am delighted that they have now welcomed 100,000 visitors since 22nd July. What an achievement and I send all my congratulations to the Lowry team. It's amazing. When I think of all those families and children, many of them dressed up as their favourite characters, looking at my illustrations and learning about Julia's writing, I feel very proud.” Throughout the exhibition there are lots of fun opportunities for children to be creative themselves as they are guided to write their own stories, draw pictures, dress up, and play fun games inspired by the books. And the Julia and Axel-themed fun is not confined to the Galleries space, with activities taking place throughout The Lowry. From selfie ops with a large Gruffalo statue outside The Lowry’s main entrance to earning a gold star at the Zog Academy in the Pier Eight lounge, and story sessions at The Highway Rat Storytelling Camp, and interactive role-play at The
out and about
Photos: Rita Sokolova
Gruffalo Play Kitchen, there’s loads happening at The Lowry for families for the duration of the exhibition. The exhibition runs until 1st January, 2024. The exhibition is free, but time slots are required, which can be booked in advance on The Lowry website. They may also be available on arrival at The Lowry - however, these will be subject to demand on the day and availability may vary so booking in advance is recommended to ensure entry. At busy times a queueing system may be in place and last entry is 30 minutes before the galleries close. The Galleries are open from Tuesday to Friday 11am - 5pm and Saturday and Sunday 10am - 5pm.
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Learning Maths: individual approach by Dr Oksana Kiseleva
The individual approach is the most effective one when teaching mathematics. Let’s admit that a class of 30 kids of different abilities cannot be taught a subject well. Moreover, according to a recent survey conducted by the Department for Education, more teachers than ever are quitting their jobs. Children are often left to the care of teaching assistants who are not qualified to teach maths to the required standard.
Unfortunately, the inability of schools to provide individual help to a child is often interpreted as the failure of the child. There is a persistent belief in our society that some people are, by nature, bad at numbers. This is not true, and cannot be used to justify the poor attainment of a child. With an appropriate methodology, numeracy is very easy to teach. All children are able to grasp the concepts underlying our numerical system, and after that normally
progress very quickly. There should be no excuse for being bad at numbers. Numeracy is an essential life-skill, and any struggling child should be intitled to individual help. What is true, is that many children are bored by numbers, and even the most able children can fall into this category. I remember one particular “underachieving” student who was totally lethargic in front of questions on calculations, but brilliant at solving logical problems which were much above the level of maths required at her school. In my experience, children make the best progress if they are allowed to work at their own pace. Some children can fly through the programme, while others need more time and a great deal of repetitive work in order to master a topic. The age or the school year of a child is irrelevant. With many children, if we want to succeed, we need to go slow to go fast.
education
contact@expressuniform.co.uk www.expressuniform.co.uk e: contact@expressuniform.co.uk t: 01625 754 888
Dr Oksana Kiseleva is a regular author for M&D Magazine. She reviews maths textbooks and other educational resources, and develops her own learning material using the ‘mathematics mastery’ approach. You can contact her on 0161 637 4853 or via www.mums-dads.co.uk/learning-maths-together
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Bowdon Preparatory School: ‘Positive Behaviour’ culture According to Helen Gee, Headmistress at Bowdon Preparatory School, nurturing positive behaviour in children is as important as teaching maths and English. She believes that having a culture of positive behaviour in school, where the whole community works together, holds key to success, by creating an environment where everyone shares high expectations and promotes healthy relationships.
“We’ve embedded core skills into all aspects of school life and these build the foundations of positive behaviour. Things like independence and organisation, reflection and self-control, cooperation and collaboration, fairness and empathy. We encourage parents and carers to work with us on this, and have found our collaborative approach to be very successful. To support the development of positive behaviour at home, there are a few points we suggest families consider: Landon -–Create now! a culture of trust and support
Children don’t get everything right first time in any subject, the same applies to behaviour.
–Be clear, fair and have consistent boundaries. Setting boundaries teaches self-discipline, coping skills and what constitutes acceptable behaviour. –Develop routines Like us, children feel more confident when daily activities are predictable and familiar. As they grow, they will be able to follow routines and adjust to change more easily. –Notice, reward and reinforce Take time to talk about your child’s actions and the impact their behaviour has had, focusing on positive outcomes. Children’s behaviour is driven by their emotions they need a safe place to unload and clear boundaries for security. Even then, there will be times when they push back! To deal with negative behaviour, try valuing your child’s ideas and thoughts; explaining the reason behind your decision; giving them time to consider pros and cons; and getting them thinking about the benefit of following rules. Remember, there’s usually a reason for their behaviour, like something unexpected or embarrassing leaves them feeling vulnerable, they’re hungry or tired, or not getting their own way.
How emotional states are managed impacts on how your child deals with future challenges and can 4 they may repress feelings and bottle them up. Next time they’re faced with a similar situation, feelings could bubble up causing stress, anxiety and aggression. Try to see behavioural problems - like tantrums, rage, lashing out and bullying - as an opportunity for growth, not judgement. Give your child space to tell you how they feel. Children may struggle to find the right words but this will come with time. Encourage them to reflect and work through negative emotions. Punishment can breed resentment. A restorative approaches separates the person from the behaviour, promoting accountability and repairing harm done. Try asking things like ‘what were you thinking or feeling’ or ‘what needs to happen to put this right’. When it comes to managing big emotions, it’s important to notice and identify your child’s feelings. Ask them how they feel in their body (butterflies, flushed etc) and how this makes them act. We would always advocate giving them coping strategies - such as relaxation, distraction and movement - you’ll soon find which work for your child.”
education
Jon - now
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Altrincham Preparatory School 'Rated excellent in all areas' (ISI)
Whole School Open Morning: Saturday 2nd March 2024
education
Telephone: 0161 928 3366 www.altprep.co.uk
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education
Reading Tips from Greenbank School Sharing the joy of reading with your children is a fantastic way to enhance their language skills, vocabulary, and imagination. Here are some useful reading tips to consider. • Start with phonics, a method that teaches children the sounds of letters and letter combinations. There are many phonics books and online resources available specifically designed for young learners. • Read aloud together and regularly. Encourage your child to ask questions, predict what might happen next, and discuss the story as you read. • Encourage independent reading. Start with simple books that have large print and repetitive patterns. Gradually introduce more challenging texts. • Take your child to the library and let them explore different books. Encourage your child to select books that interest them and let them enjoy the process of choosing their own reading material. • Create a reading routine, that will make reading a regular part of your child's day. Set aside a dedicated time each day, it could be before bedtime, after lunch, or any other time that works best for your child. • Make reading fun and interactive. Use funny voices for different characters, act out scenes from the book, or play games related to the story. • Discuss books. Ask your child about their favourite parts, the characters they liked, or what they learned from the book. This helps develop comprehension skills and encourages critical thinking. • Be a reading role model. When children observe their parents enjoying books, they are more likely to develop a love for reading themselves.
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Politeness: costs nothing, opens doors everywhere. Most of us are told this from a very young age, bombarded with phrases such as “what do you say?” or “what’s the magic word?” and so on.
I agree wholeheartedly - manners are essential, and we react negatively when people don’t display them. Who hasn’t muttered “you’re welcome” in an absurdly sarcastic tone after holding open a door or letting a car nudge into the line ahead of them? As a parent, I would prefer my children to be polite and well behaved in public and in school, and save any bad behaviour for home. Of course, in an ideal world they would be angels all the time, but that would be an impossibility. And my boys are polite I get compliments on their general demeanour, and although they’re horrible to me at times I think I’m in the majority of parents who believe this is how it should be. Children generally save their anger and frustration for home after a day of sitting like a coiled spring in a classroom, they wait until they are safe and can vent in the knowledge that they will still be loved at the end of their tantrum.
As someone who works with children daily, however, I meet kids whose manners differ greatly due to neurodivergence. We have a seemingly endless number of children in classes who have, or are awaiting a diagnosis for, some form of SEN: so many that actually it seems to dilute the pool of ‘special’ educational need into what feels more like ‘usual’ (notice I didn’t say normal, since who knows what that is). Increasingly, any class-based situations that arise, when discussed with either parents or colleagues, end up containing the phrase “but they are *insert relevant neurodivergence*”. I, however, wonder whether for some of these children their behaviour is more attributable to parental influence than to any neurodivergent condition that they may have. In the summer, I came up against a 6 year old whom I have taught regularly. He’s cute, when he wishes to be, but polite? No. Neurodiverse? Possibly. The day unfolded something like this... 9.30am: Arrival. So far, so good. 10am: A teamwork exercise making sea-themed shapes as a group. Child: I don’t want to be a mast. Me: Why don’t you be a cannon ball then, instead?
“Mum does a thing called soft parenting”, my teacher explains. “I think he needs to be diagnosed”. Really, I thought? And to what end? This is where I come back to the subject of manners. Yes, there are people who struggle with social constraints, but this is a child of 6 who calls adults around him names, expects preferential treatment and stamps his foot if he doesn’t get it. I have no doubt that there’s something neurological there but simply slapping a label on it won’t help him in the long run. How will he cope in the adult world if he is consistently excused poor behaviour on the basis of a diagnosis? Anyone who has worked in customer service will appreciate the importance C: No, I don’t want to do this! (Stomps of treating people as you would wish to to corner and sits arms folded) I hate be treated and recognising that the way it here. you speak to others directly affects how Me: Thank you, that’s nice. successful you are at getting what you This was the general routine per activity need or resolving an issue. I remember throughout the day. We would working in the Prince Edward Theatre attempt to engage him, when he and being spoken to rudely by a lady didn’t feel it was going his way, we’d from the audience. I bit back, but my try to bring him back down to earth colleague killed the situation with and then tiptoe around him. kindness and said: “Feel sorry for her Circa 2.30pm she gets that reaction wherever she C: I hate this game, it’s lame! (Stomps goes”. Of course, because she’s impolite to corner again. Game continues. and the world reflects that back to her. Children enjoying themselves. Child Politeness does cost nothing. We decides to return.) are consistently told to be kind and Me: Excuse me, sit down. considered. And we should, as we don’t C: I want to play. know what is going on in a person’s Me: You said it was lame. life. But when it comes to children, I C: I want to PLAY!!! believe they also need our help and Me: Please say sorry. encouragement in becoming more C: No, you’re a horrible fat woman. than their label. (I’m a size 12 and generally considered to be rather nice) I’m never coming I am not for a second suggesting that back here with you. I hate it. neurodivergence should be ignored. I’m Me: Thank you, that’s nice. saying that by focussing exclusively on a child’s diagnosis and allowing them We removed the child to a separate to do whatever they want without any room where he proceeded to kick restriction, we are encouraging a geneverything in sight. He was collected eration of children (and parents) that early by mum to whom we said: don’t know how to accept responsibility “Don’t worry! He did so well, it’s a for their actions or the consequences long day”. No he didn’t. He ruined the that may arise from them. day for us all.
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Mind your manners by Cat Allen, Director of Noodle Performing Arts, Cheshire
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New year resolutions
by Paul Wojnicki
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home gym options; an exercise bike, a rowing machine or a treadmill for instance, all of which are also available in Decathlon.
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One great way to fill that empty space on your couch with a furry friend is to adopt one, from a rehoming centre such as the Dogs Trust so that as well as improving your own mental and physical Rehome a dog health you can also provide a loving • home to a dog that’s desperate to find When it comes to getting motivated a new mum and dad. The really good to go outside and have a walk, there thing about rehoming charities is that, really is nothing like having a dog. as well as doing some good, you’ll be Rain or shine, they need walking every dealing with people who take time to single day, which means you’ll be learn about you and your family and walking as well. We had a dog in our what dog is best for you and your cirfamily for 12 years before he passed cumstances. You might even talk to them away, and walked as a family every and realise that a dog isn’t actually for single weekend, with the children just you, because they’re interested in the dog’s welfare rather than getting their accepting that this was part of our hands on your money. Much better than family routine. Since we lost our dog buying from an unscrupulous puppy it's been all too easy for us to stay Bring the gym home There were other guided multigyms in factory or breeder, they’ll also have had glued to our sofa watching TV, gaming • Decathlon, but my wife approved this or watching silly videos on YouTube, all their vaccinations and will have The problem I’ve always had with purchase because aesthetically it’s already been neutered. even on sunny days. So, trust me, signing up to a gym is self-conscious- more appealing than most, thanks to when you have a four-legged family ness about my physical appearance. the cover which hides the industrialmember wagging its tail and nudging • Cycle with the kids and/or to work I’ve always been leaner - okay skinnier looking inner workings. The fact that you with its wet nose, you won’t be - than 99% of the male population the weights are guided and not “free able to resist going outside and getand as one woman close to my heart weights” was also important as it’s Pretty much everyone knows how to ting your limbs moving. once noted, “the last time I saw legs completely safe, even for weaklings cycle, and cycling with the kids is one of like yours, they were hanging out of a like myself, and the worst that can the great pleasures of family life. But as crow’s nest”. So, I’ve always been in a happen is a bit of a clunking noise if I well as being an excellent bonding Catch 22 situation, I felt too puny not drop the weights mid-session. Our experience - and getting the kids outto go to the gym, but embarrassed to eleven-year-old son has even started doors - the health benefits of cycling go because I was so slim. using it on the lower settings and are numerous. Improved fitness, better My solution last January was to while I still supervise him - I know it’s heart health, increased happiness, bring the gym into my home with a completely safe for him too. boosted immunity - from fresh air and Compact Guided Weight Machine Okay, I still don’t look like Arnold vitamin D - and better relationships are Home Gym 900, from Decathlon. It’s Schwarzenegger and I’m still leaner just a few of the benefits. You don’t have an incredibly compact home gym, than 98% of the male population, but to adorn yourself in brightly-coloured with a footprint of just 138 cm by 103 at least I’m a lot more toned now and Lycra or buy the latest super-expensive cm, which is less than a typical desk. there’s nothing quite like strength road bike either. Just 30 minutes a day training to get the blood flowing. I can reap all these dividends with your feel stronger, fitter and healthier than fitness; one recent study claimed that I’ve ever felt in my life - which isn’t people who cycle for half an hour a day, bad given that I’m turning 50 in 2024 five days a week take about half as many - because the benefits of lifting sick days as those who do not exercise. Dogs, and pets in general, are weights aren’t just aesthetic. Weight There are a number of different superb for adults and children’s physitraining improves heart health, cycle to work schemes and initiatives cal and mental health and they’re a increases your metabolism, helps which mean you can get a fancy new particularly good way of teaching improve bone density and reduce the responsibility to children, while also bike and accessories with a discount of risk of osteoporosis, and also controls fostering a deeper respect for all ani- 25-39% - depending on your tax code. blood sugar levels - thus reducing the mals. Not only that, but they’re a great You pay nothing upfront and pay in 12 monthly instalments, which are taken risk of diabetes. And, unlike going to a way of meeting new people because from your salary before tax, thus the gym, I can’t see my enthusiasm tailing walking your dog inevitably leads to saving. At the end of the 12 months off because the Home Gym 900 is right chats with neighbours, other dog owners and strangers alike – in much some schemes require you to pay a behind my desk in my office, so I only the same way as walking with a new small token amount, while others don’t. have to walk a metre or so to get baby in a pram gets you talking to It’s an excellent incentive to save money there. If you don’t like the idea of other mums, dads or neighbours. and get fitter at the same time. weight training there are other great
