February 15, 2015

E s t abl ished 19 16

Tuesday, Febr uar y 17, 20 15

w w w.mus t angne w s .net

Cal Poly men’s basketball handles Long Beach State Nick Larson @njlarson8

After leading at halftime once again, the Cal Poly men’s basketball team (12-11, 5-6 Big West Conference) was able to reverse its trend of losing leads, holding on to defeat Long Beach State 71-58.

The Mustangs were able to shut down the 49ers (13-14, 7-4) and their potent offense led by senior guard Mike Caffey, who is averaging 16.9 points on the year. Caffey was held to just eight points in 34 minutes of play, going 3 for 12 from the field, including 0 for 5 from 3-point range.

Cal Poly’s success continued on the offensive side of the ball. Junior forward Joel Awich had a game-high 19 points to go alongside seven rebounds, while junior guard Reese Morgan provided his usual spark off the bench, dropping in 18 points and going 4 for 8 from behind the arc.

The Mustangs are dealing with injuries, including junior guard and leading-scorer David Nwaba, who is out indefinitely with mononucleosis. Due to the circumstances, only eight Cal Poly players saw action and only six saw significant time.

Sophomore guard Ridge Shipley and ju-

nior forward Brian Bennett continued to help carry the load. Shipley finished with 14 points and four assists, while Bennett chipped in with 10 points and a game-high nine rebounds.

As a team, the Mustangs shot 47.1 percent from t he

f ield and an impressive 44.4 percent (12 of 27) from 3-point range while turning over the ball just 13 times.

Wit h just five games left in Big West play, Cal Poly currently sits in

a tie for sixth place with UC Riverside.

T he top e i g ht te ams ma ke t he conference tournament, which, barring a complete disaster, seems to be a lock. The seeding though is still up for grabs, with three teams just two games or less ahead of the Mustangs in the Big West standings.

Cal Poly heads on the road next weekend to face last-place Cal State Fullerton on Feb. 19, then to UC Riverside on Feb. 21 for a key conference matchup.

The final three games may be the three most important — and toughest — of the season. Cal Poly will ho st s e c ond - pl a c e U C Ir v i ne on Feb. 26, and t hen f irst-pl ace UC D avis on Feb. 28. The Mu s t a n g s w i l l t h e n r o u n d o u t c o n f e r e n c e p l ay at f o u r t h - p l a c e UC Santa Barbara in the Thunderdome, a tough, hostile matchup regardless of the standings.

It may all not even matter, though, as last year’s Cal Poly squad knows.

Once the Big West Tournament starts, anyone — even a No. 7 seed — can take home Wigant said. the trophy.

IAN BILLINGS | MUSTANG NE WS BIG GAME BENNETT | Junior forward Brian Bennett and the Cal Poly men’s basketball team took down Long Beach State on Saturday night. Bennett scored 10 points while also pulling down a game-high nine rebounds.

ILIANA ARROYOS | MUSTANG NE WS CUNT | Cal Poly students delivered delightfully candid (and uncomfortable) monologues in their renditions of “The Vagina Monologues” this weekend, including a monologue about reclaiming the word “cunt.”

‘Vagina Monologues’ delivers provoking performances Will Peischel The crowd of girls, bourgeois boyfriends and horrified step-mother types is hushed. They sit in the dimly lit Performing Arts Center (PAC), leaned forward around a stage that’s one part boxing rink and one part soap box. In the back the ushers quietly grin.

The sold-out “Vagina Monologues” pulled no punches and yielded no yawns on Friday night when

Cal Poly students and San Luis Obispo citizens attended the play meant to empower and vocalize often suppressed issues women face on a regular basis.

The ladies navigated a potentially pseudo-Greenwich vibe that’s all too easy to fall into during coffee shop poetry-type performances. What they arrived at felt organic and human. The “Vagina Monologues” is a candid diary entry, much more

@CPMustangArts exclusive than a Facebook post — too sincere for Tumblr. It’s handwritten, complete with nail polish marks and coffee stains, scribbled out thoughts and hand gestures.

Totally vulnerable.

The monologues, each several minutes long, completely varied in heaviness and topic. One monologue concerned misplaced blame women

have to face when they wear revealing clothing, one comprised of an astoundingly long list of slang for vaginas and one described an incredibly boring, incredibly sexually capable man named “Bob.”

see MONOLOGUES, pg 5.

Greek life still on social probation Olivia Proffit @ojproffit

FILE PHOTO | MUSTANG NE WS

Administration returned the Students Taking Action Towards University Safety plan (STATUS) to fraternities and sororities last week with its edits.

The plan seeks to reduce the number of sexual assaults on campus and was created in response to the university placing greek life on probation for at least 30 days.

Sororities and fraternities are still on social probation while administration works with greek life’s

student leaders to finalize the plan.

According to Panhellenic President Kristen Henry, the party registration policy is now being reviewed before a decision about social probation is made.

“The party registration oolicy and STATUS go hand in hand,” Henry said. “We’re looking at what worked and what hasn’t worked this past year to make those changes to the policy.”

Once STATUS and the party registration policy is finalized, administration will decide whether or not to take sororities and fraternities off social probation.

News... 1-3 | Arts... 4-6 | Opinion... 7 | Classifieds... 8 | Sports... 9-10

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

NEWS | 2

Cal Poly ‘Galentine’s Day’ garners support from Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls

K AREN GARCIA | MUSTANG NE WS UTERUSES BEFORE DUDERUSES | Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls Organization purchased student-created designs featured at Cal Poly’s Galentine’s Day. The printable cards are for sale on the Smart Girls website.

Karen Garcia Special to Mustang News

The month of February isn’t just about red roses, chocolate hearts and gifts for your significant other — it’s also about Galentine’s Day. Invented by the main character Leslie Knope (played by Amy Poehler) in the show “Parks and Recreation,” Galentine’s Day cel-

ebrates female friends the day before Valentine’s Day. This concept inspired graphic communication juniors Trudy Vinson and Alyssa Wigant to throw their own Galentine’s Day on Feb. 5.

They promoted feminism with student-designed invitations sporting the slogan “Eliminate Girl Hate,” a phrase taken from Amy Poehler’s organization,

Amy Poehler’s Smart Girls.

Wigant and Vinson emailed the Smart Girls Organization about their Galentine’s Day event and received not only positive feedback, but interaction from the program as well.

After seeing the invitations that Vinson, Wigant and other student designers created, the Smart Girls Organization purchased the designs, which are

now available on the website as printable cards.

The Galentine’s Day event was a success, as well.

“It was made up of two parts, the first part was a UU booth,” Wigant said. “We gave out invitations that girls designed at Cal poly and we gave out candy, nail polish and bumped music.

The second part in the evening was ladies’ night.”

The ladies’ night was more of a discussion on feminism and female empowerment, themes that are paramount to Galentine’s Day. “Ladies’ night was a real discussion about hashing out problems of girl hate and promoting female friendships,” Vinson said. “A lot of the time girls will see each other as competition or judge one another

really harshly.”

Vinson and Wigant asked that the funds raised by the Smart Girls Organization’s purchase be given to the Cal Poly Gender Equity Center so they can host more events such as Galentine’s Day. For more information about the Smart Girls organization or to purchase a Galentine’s card for your favorite female, visit amysmartgirls.com.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

NEWS | 3

New study abroad programs make India the classroom Lauren Piraro Special to Mustang News

India is 8,290 miles away from California, nestled between Pakistan and Nepal. Someone who is not familiar with India might conjure up colorful visions of an exotic and foreign land teeming with life and cultural complexities.

Though not typically thought of as a study abroad destination, India has many lessons to teach Cal Poly students — in and out of the classroom.

With two new study abroad programs, “Business and Culture in India” and “Management and Culture in India,” being introduced this year, students will have the opportunity to get to know the real India while also earning college credit.

Cal Poly packaging program director and business administration professor Jay Singh said he is eager to embark on a fourweek experiential business and culture course that’s distinctly tailored with a unique approach to learning.

“You go to a new company, it’s a new classroom,” he explained.

“It’s not anything that I know Cal Poly or any other program is doing currently where the classroom changes three times a day on the road.”

The “Business and Culture in India” program includes a humanities and business course, “India: Culture, Traditions and Globalization” and “Indian Business Culture.” The humanities course will focus on various

aspects of India’s culture, like spirituality, geography and history that heavily influence the country’s business operations.

Singh estimates that he will be visiting at least 20 companies throughout the course of the trip.

During the graduate student study abroad programs that he has led in the past, visits have included Cisco, Google and IBM. Singh said learning about India’s unique business structure will further business students’ careers.

“You’ve got all these crazy things going on that would never be acceptable to our society, but these are the type of countries that will be dictating terms in a few decades,” he said.

“I’m just exposing students to the human side of things. You could take all the business courses here at Cal Poly and never understand that aspect.”

While traveling from New Delhi to Agra, Mumbai, Pune and Bengaluru, students will have the option to further immerse themselves into the culture with visits to a yoga ashram, the opportunity to experience Mumbai’s nightlife, participate in cooking classes and visit open air street markets. Each city will also incorporate a guided tour along with a free day to wander and explore.

“We’ll be taking them to the Taj Mahal, some forts and factories and we’ll see things being made and constructed,” Singh said. “If they think they know Indian food, it’s going to be an eye-opener.”

Singh incorporates pre-departure sessions into his program to better prepare the students for the

LAUREN PIRARO | MUSTANG NE WS TAJ MAHAL | Learning about India’s unique business structure will further business students’ careers, business administration professor Jay Singh said.

adventure ahead.

“We try to get them to learn about India as much as they can beforehand,” he said. “Then again, we can’t really prepare anyone for it. Even I get surprised when I go back there, even though I’ve been there so many times.”

Understanding different types of business and culture is critical for students, whether they are seeking degrees in business or not, Singh says.

“The exposure will bring a lot of meaning to whoever participates,” he said. “It’s not just a course. It’s also about learning about yourself, learning to adapt, learning to be understanding. And that’s the underlying theme throughout all of this.”

Another new and emerging Cal Poly study abroad opportunity in India is “Management and Culture in India,” led by international management professor Beena Khurana.

The courses within the pro-

gram includes “Culture of India,” a humanities course and a business course titled “International and Cross-cultural management.” Classes are at the Indian School of Business, a premiere college within the country located in Hyderabad.

“I teach international management and cross-cultural relations, so taking a course like that in India is virtually like having a laboratory right around you,” she said. “It makes wonderful sense.”

She plans to begin in Hyderabad while making her way to Mohali. Along the way, students will have the opportunity to explore the culture of India through many varied and colorful assignments, like wearing traditional Indian clothing for a day and renting out an auditorium for a screening of a Bollywood film.

“One is never too old to become bicultural,” she explained.

“The idea is that I am going to

introduce you to a new culture and encourage you to embrace it. And you should come back a changed person.”

Excursions outside of the main city include a trip to the Taj Mahal in Agra and a trek to Amritsar’s Golden Temple. A visit to the Wagha Border of India and Pakistan for the changing of the guard will be a great learning experience for students.

“This really gives the students a good sense of history and a good sense of India’s colonial past,” she said.

While visiting the cities, Khurana scheduled tours to better acquaint the students with nearby temples, architectural monuments and markets.

Guest lectures are also planned with speakers discussing Indian literature, social movements and women’s issues in India.

Visits to varying types of businesses and companies are also on the itinerary.

“You will see things that bother you,” she said. “On the other hand, you will also see things that really please you. It’s a country that speaks to your heart and you must be prepared to feel.”

Khurana says her goal is to make sure students come back from their trip with a widened perspective.

“One could first ask, ‘Why travel to India?’” she said. “India has become a progressively larger player on the global scene. It really behooves us to introduce India to Cal Poly students and that’s my objective.”

Khurana explains that her program is an effective way to gain bi-cultural experience, whether you are a business administration major or not, which is an attractive quality to employers.

“You might come back from India not having liked it, but you might come back having fallen in love with the place,” she said. “You will never know sitting here in San Luis Obispo.”

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

ARTS | 4

How coffee helped us count cards

JOSEPH PACK | MUSTANG NE WS LUCKY BREWS | Mustang News coffee columnist Annie Vainshtein expected her trip to Chumash Casino Resort to yield cash, but instead she ended up with a night of coffee tasting and awkward social interactions.

Annie Vainshtein @annievain

Anyone who ever turns 18 will, at some point in their lives, go to a casino. Last week, my friends and I drove a collective 131 miles to Chumash Casino Resort, where all things good go to die. Anyone who’s ever wasted $47 on gas knows there’s a

certain novelty to the first 10 miles driven, but after it started raining and our iPhones were treading 20 percent battery threshold, life got a little scary.

We arrived at what we thought would vibe “Ocean’s Eleven,” but in reality couldn’t even attempt to mimic Vegas. Fumbling over our heels and throwing away our McFlurrys, we walked up the

metallic stairs, all 15 of us feeling a communal shiver of unpleasantness.

It smelled like cigarillos and Medicaid.

We were the gang of black sheep — kids who sometimes confused Al Capone with Al Gore and thought poker was always played the way it was in “The Parent Trap.”

After a few failed slot rounds and some patronizing looks from local strawberry farmers, we were losing morale. We threatened to walk out — we were so done with the failed expectation we began to hate America and everything it stood for.

But then — the cart.

There was a coffee cart, and then two and then we realized they were everywhere. We couldn’t resist the men with mustaches manning the stations. These were real baristas. They knew what they were doing. And they would likely do it for the rest of their lives.

Suddenly, we had sovereignty over our lives. We got to choose, and we weren’t losing anything.

We got to pick hot or iced, and even customize our cream and sugar orders. As we zig-zagged through

the casino, we played a convoluted game of “Where’s Waldo?” with the shining carts. That was quite the game!

Until catching wind of an Arabian roast ready and able for rapid consumption, we’d been living what Socrates would call an “unexamined life.” And that life was starting to be unworthy of living. But that was over now.

The coffee was actually — dare we say — good. It could have been the mounds of caffeine that had been syringed into the industrial coffee machinery, but we didn’t care. Because after the first few decadent sips carefully crafted by Chumash’s county-ranked baristas, we started to win.

It was either a call from unknown higher spirits or the coffee, but one of us won $65 after only two clicks

of a button — and I won a dollar!

As Herbert Spencer would put it, it was survival of the fittest, and by casino standards, we were at the top of the chain.

The casino was a giant cesspool of people unwilling to transcend oral fixation, but who were we to turn down something not only unlimited, but free?

We pranced around, losing every inhibition we once had — we spent $6 on cigars we would later say were “definitely Cubans” and asked various adult males if they were once our Uber drivers.

Casinos do something to you — they take your money. But coffee?

Coffee makes you win. Always, every time, no question about it.

Note: Net result of our generated casino winnings: -$40.

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Tuesday, February 17, 2015

ARTS | 5

Loverspeak 2015 showcases ‘Fifty Shades’ of love Kelly Trom @kttrom

Those sitting in Warren J. Baker Science and Mathematics (building 180), room 101 last night learned a lesson not often taught in Cal Poly classrooms — that sometimes a clever Amazon review can have more literary merit than a widely read novel that sold more than 450 million copies.

An eclectic mix of love poems, odes to food, ex-boyfriend poems and readings of the poetry giants, this year’s Loverspeak did not disappoint. This show was a mix of student and faculty original work along with some classic poetry readings.

“It makes me so proud to be a part of the English department because we have such a strong faculty that is so supportive of their students,” English senior and Byzantium co-editor Monique Nicholas said.

“For every couple of students, we had a faculty member that read. It is so wonderful to be a part of because you have people that are brilliant at what they do and actually qualified to read these things and be published poets and authors.”

From Shakespeare to Edgar Allen Poe to a satirical reading of E.L. James, the best-selling author of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” this event captured all types of love. While reading Shakespeare and James

in the same room might at first appear to be blasphemous, it is characteristic of the ever-creative, sometimes deep, sometimes wacky English department students and faculty.

The English graduate student trio David Llamas, Emily Nybo and Carla Weber were the creative geniuses behind the theatrical rendition of two combined scenes from “Fifty Shades of Grey,” a very timely choice considering the film hit films two days before.

Their goal was to shock the audience, but not the way you would first expect.

“It started out as a joke that we should read ‘Fifty Shades of Grey,’ but then we started reading it and realized it was so poorly written and we felt like we had to share it,” Nybo said.

Nybo read Anastasia’s uninspired parts, Weber read Christian Grey’s monosyllabic dialogue and Llamas chimed in as Anastasia’s subconscious, denoted by italics in the novel. It all made for a dramatic, one-of-akind reading of a scene in which E. L. James tried and failed to make using someone else’s toothbrush sound sexy.

“It was Carla and Emily who mostly assembled it so I wound up with all of the inappropriate parts,” Llamas said. “They said,

‘Davey will say, ‘Holy fuck.’’”

Llamas took to the stage once more after intermission for a dramatic reading of an Amazon review, “My dinner with Andrea”, for a five-pound bag of Haribo Sugar Free G u m my

Emma Woodard brought t h e au d i e n c e i nt o t h e shoes of a girl coming to terms with the concept of masturbating for the first time.

The confession, though scripted, came candid — shiny English accent and all.

The auburn dress stepped back and forth across the stage like a German clock figurine at the top of the hour. On each corner of the stage, a girl sat back, legs open, peering into the abyss between her thighs.

“I didn’t have to find my cli-

pick random things and can map it out.”

This was Kelly’s first time reading poetry at Loverspeak. She took a departure from her more native genre of short fiction writing because she wanted to read a poem at Loverspeak before she graduated.

Overall, Nicholas was more impressed with the quality of material read at the event this year than any other.

“I think there was a higher caliber of writing this year,” Nicholas said. “Last year there were a few poems that kind of lost me. This year my attention was grabbed by almost every single poem.”

Describing the event as a sort of English Department homecoming, Nicholas was proud of the faculty and students that shared their own original work but also wanted to encourage more people from all different departments to contribute next year.

“I know this school is full of bright, talented individuals so if next year we could get more students within and outside the English department to not only support but also submit that would be awesome,” Nicholas said.

Loverspeak raised $228.50 for Byzantium, which will be unveiled during spring quarter.

“My vagina was chatty, can’t wait, so much saying, so much words talking, can’t quit saying, can’t quit trying, oh yes, oh yes,” said Frye.

“Not since I dream there’s a dead animal sewn in down there with thick black fishing line,” Benner went on. “And that bad dead animal’s smell cannot be removed. And its throat is slit and it bleeds

through all my summer dresses.”

It was unwavering and stomach-twisting; the bigger crime would be for the story to go untold.

Whether funny, self-deprecating, serious, personal or crude, all of the monologues were honest. They encapsulated the woman’s experience, but stayed disarming enough to survive the patronizing of a still

male-dominated society. It certainly turned heads and started some conversations.

Whether it will catalyze psyche shift in the audience is to be seen.

There will be two more performances of the “Vagina Monologues” in English on Saturday at 7:30 p.m. and Sunday at 3 p.m. A Spanish version will also debut on Feb. 21 at 8 p.m.

people that are brilliant at what they do and actually qualified to read these things and be published poets and authors.

MONIQUE NICHOLAS ENGLISH SENIOR BYZANTIUM CO-EDITOR

Bears.

It chronicled the misfortunes of a boy in love with a German girl, who ate too many sugar-free gummy bears before their first date, only to late find out that they had a

STORYTELLING | The monologues’ topics ranged from discovering masturbation to brutal accounts of rape. toris, I had to be it!” Woodard exclaimed with invigoration.

“Be. My. Clitoris.”

“I lay back and I closed my eyes. I put the mirror down. I saw mys elf f loating ab ove mys elf. And I watche d a s I s l ow l y b e g a n t o approach myself and re-enter myself. It’s quiet as I’m re - e nte r i ng . Q u i e t , and g e nt l e . I f e l t l i k e a n astronaut re-entering the surface of the earth. I bounced, and landed. Landed and bounced. I came into my own muscles and then I slid into my vagina. It was suddenly easy, and I fit.”

Woodard may not have written the piece, but she inherited

had to read these gummy bear reviews and that one seemed fitting.”

The other poems’ themes included hot dogs (English department lecturer Sean Green’s “Grill-

ing for One”), ex-lovers (“To my past loves: a confessional poem”

by English alumnus Emily Olson) and famous literary figures (“Emily Dickinson Takes a Man into Her Room” by English professor David Kann). English senior and Byzantium co-editor Adrienne King especially loved the emotionfilled and more unconventional pieces of poetry.

“I teared up a few times, I teared up from laughing several times, and I was completely nonplussed at times,” King said.

“I mean the sexual Emily Dickinson came out of left field.”

One of the more heartfelt poems came from English senior Rhiannon Kelly in dedication to her boyfriend of almost five years, computer engineering junior Daniel Griffith.

Her poem talked about his obsession with the number five, which stems from his middle name, Vincent, and his birthday on Cinco De Mayo among other things.

“I feel like people grab on to those kind of things, like their favorite color or what house they would be in if they went to Hogwarts,” Kelly said. “They try and pick those little things that make sense out of all the crazy stuff and kind of like that idea that you

It is so wonderful to be a part of because you have

ILIANA ARROYOS | COURTESY PHOTO

MONOLOGUES continued from pg 1.

laxative effect.

“There is a lot of anxiety associated with romance and going on a date so it seemed to combine that anxiety with digestion problems,” Llamas said. “For some reason, someone told me that I

the dilemma and solution when she confessed it to the crowd.

Not every monologue was elated self-discovery, though.

“My Vagina Was My Village” forcefully held the attention of the audience as two girls took the roles of women who were raped during the Yugoslav Wars in the ‘90s.

Draped in refugee garb, English senior Karlee Benner and theater studies senior Melissa Frye exchanged melancholy lines.

“There is something between my legs,” Benner admitted. “I do not know what it is. I do not know where it is. I do not touch. Not now. Not anymore.

Not since.”

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OPINION | 7

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Leave my country music alone Eric Stubben @EricStubben Eric Stubben is a mechanical engineering junior and Mustang News conservative columnist. These views do not necessarily reflect the opinion or editorial coverage of Mustang News.

Here’s the deal: This week I get to write about country music.

I apologize to anybody who wanted to read some heated debate about the Keystone XL pipeline or something like that, but hey, just wait a couple weeks.

Mustang News’ own sports editor, Nick Larson, published an article titled “Why Your Music Sucks: Country Edition.” Now don’t get me wrong, I like Nick. He’s a quality guy and we share mutual fansmanship (is that even a word?) for the Green Bay Packers.

Nick’s article, or slaying, as it’s better termed, about country music nearly ripped my soul out. I live and breathe country music, so pardon me if I get a little worked up over the course of this article.

First, let me clarify something: I’m not country. I have one pair of boots that are affectionately termed “Mountain Sperry’s” every time I wear them, I don’t own a single cowboy hat and I consistently try to act normal when I’m blasting country music out of my 4-cylinder Kia. As I’ve said probably a half dozen times before, I’m from a small town and worked for one summer as a farmhand. That’s about as close to fitting the bill of country as I get, so I’m not exactly the stereotypical “hick” that Nick affectionately alluded to.

Enough about me. I want to move on to dissecting Nick’s opinions.

Everything is the same I’m not even going to pretend like this is a real argument.

Maybe when one listens to country radio for a few minutes until they get bored, this is the conclusion one comes to.

From George Strait’s “I’ve got a Car” to Justin Moore’s “Lettin’ the Night Roll” to Florida-Georgia Line’s “Sun Daze,” country music has any number of various styles.

Granted, the goal of radio is to be popular. Radio plays what sells, and what sells often sounds the same. It’s this way for any genre. To find the depths of any genre, one just has to dig a little deep-

er than the shallow tunes of the radio.

In Nick’s article, he also states that country is “a genre that hates women almost as much as rap does.” As a mechanical engineering student, I like numbers, so let’s take a look at them. At last week’s Grammy’s, three of the four country awards were taken home by women (Carrie Underwood, Miranda Lambert and The Band Perry).

Don’t forget to overlook Kacey Musgraves’ CMA Song of the Year award for her song “Follow Your Arrow,” which speaks favorably about samesex relationships and lighting up joints.

Maybe country music isn’t as shallow as its shallow-minded critics make it out to be.

Last, Nick also claims “country artists aren’t true artists because they don’t progress.”

Please, somebody tell me this isn’t serious.

I’ll use country star Kenny Chesney as an example of a country musician who is continually evolving. Chesney’s early hits were classic country songs featuring “three chords and the truth.” Since then, Chesney has expanded his repertoire into country infused with both island and gypsy-style influences.

If one person could honestly listen to country music from Cash, Hank, Willie and Waylon through the artists of today and tell me with a straight face that there’s been no progression, I’d possibly drop dead on the spot.

Check that, I’d assume they were lying and carry on with my life.

Templates “Every country song has the same formula.” False.

Refer to iTunes top country singles #100 through #200.

These are the great songs; ones that were once number ones, but just hang around for old times’ sake because they’re that good. None of these sound the same. You now have two options: You can trust me, or you can go and test it.

I’m now going to pretend like I didn’t get worked up about the claims that country music stars are essentially bigoted racists. I’ve been referred to as a bigot and racist (unjustly) enough in our comment section that I’ve learned not to touch these terms with a tenfoot pole.

Has Hank Williams Jr. said some dumb things? Yes. Does Blake Shelton have a filter? No. In general, however, country stars tend to be pretty realistic, down-to-earth people.

The last thing I have to say here is just an ode to Canada.

The Right Angle Trust me, Nick, country stars don’t hate everything “nonAmerican.” On my daily drive to work in Hamilton, Washington (Google it) this past summer, Canadian country radio was the only station available. You have my word that Canadians are crazy about country music. I doubt this would be the case if country stars were so hateful about “non-American” things.

Music festivals I’ll be honest, Nick’s depiction of country music festivals was spot on.

But for the sake of opinion, I’ll make my argument.

All music festivals are the same. People get excited to go sit in the middle of nowhere for a few days and saturate their bodies with all sorts of … good things. These people enjoy the first couple of days, then get too hungover for the third and somehow find a way to leave after the last feature performer.

Country music festivals are exactly like any other music festival, just with more tobacco cans and fewer doses

of narcotics. If one hates on country music festivals, they better hate on all the rest.

There’s just one thing I can’t figure out: How does Nick Larson — a former beer columnist and self-proclaimed beer enthusiast — hate America’s greatest excuse for sitting around and doing nothing but drink beer for three days?

Instruments Hey, at least country music has real instruments. Yes, ones that require actual talent to play rather than mixing few loops on a tabletop Macbook and pretending to be somewhat musically talented.

Take, for example, country stars Keith Urban and Brad Paisley. They can shred on the guitar along with their singing talents. That’s the making of true musicians.

Last, let me just clarify Nick’s one point: Banjo. Badass.

Assorted love I might as well have just titled this section “Eric Church.” A master of nostalgia and relatability, Church is the sole sav-

ior and representation of all that is right in country music.

I’d be surprised if anybody noticed that I’ve been sneaking Eric Church quotes into my columns over the past year and a half.

Hand-picked to be the heir to “The King” George Strait, Church once wrote a song called “Country Music Jesus.”

Call him selfish, but little did he know he was writing a song about himself.

End notes Question: Who holds the alltime indoor concert attendance record?

Answer: George Strait, who attracted more than 104,000 fans to AT&T Stadium in Texas last year.

Anybody who wants to hate on country music is free to do so, but I’m sure in no time they’ll find comfort in hanging around George Strait’s “ocean front property in Arizona.”

For now, I’ll just go back to listening to my country music spirit song, Thomas Rhett’s “All-American Middle Class White Boy.”

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Tuesday, February 17, 2015

SPORTS | 9

Cal Poly baseball swept by Baylor in season-opening series

BAYLOR ATHLETICS | COURTESY PHOTO BROOMED

| The Cal Poly baseball team got off to a lackluster start last weekend, losing all three games in the season-opening series at Baylor. The Mustangs next take the field on Feb. 17 at Fresno State.

Jesse Summers @CPMustangSports

The Cal Poly baseball team (0-3) simply couldn’t catch Baylor (3-0) on the road, dropping three in a row in Texas from Feb. 13-15.

After losing 8-6 to the Bears on Friday night behind a disappointing defensive performance, the Mustangs looked to rally around Saturday’s starting pitcher, sophomore Slater Lee. He faced a tough Bears team and gave up three runs on five hits and a walk within the first two innings. Lee would be replaced by freshman Kyle Smith, who didn’t have much better luck.

Heading into the fourth in-

ning, down 5-1, the Mustangs got hot, stringing together a couple hits and finishing off the inning with an opposite field, two-run homerun by junior outfielder Zack Zehner, tying the game at 5-5. The Mustangs would then shut down the Bears for the bottom half, following up with a solo home run from freshman Brett Barbier in the top of the fifth.

The Bears followed the pair of Cal Poly home runs with a rally of their own, playing fundamental baseball with a series of walks, bunts and sacrifice at bats. The Bears took a 7-6 lead at the end of the sixth inning.

It seemed every time Baylor was faced with adversity this weekend, it was able to respond

in whatever way necessary to regain the lead. Baylor would cushion its lead with a single run later in the bottom of the eighth inning and close out the game in the ninth without allowing a runner on base.

Barbier would finish with an impressive stat line though, going 3-for-5 with two RBI and two runs.

Cal Poly lost 8-6 once again, its second close game in a row, and would have to rise early for a 12 p.m. Sunday game time.

Seemingly burnt out after two tough games in a row, the Mustangs were unable to put runs on the board in Sunday’s matchup, losing 6-0. Baylor starting pitcher Theron Kay gave up five hits in his short

four-inning performance, and was followed by two dominating relief performances by his teammates Troy Montemayor and Daniel Castano.

Cal Poly recorded seven hits in the final game of the series, with senior outfielder Jordan Ellis

and junior shortstop Peter Van Gansen each notching a pair.

The Mustangs can chalk up the weekend to a combination of early season rust and a lack of experience from the multiple new starters implemented into the lineup. Starting off

against a tough Big-12 side isn’t easy either.

Looking ahead, the Mustangs will play at Fresno State on Tuesday at 6:35 p.m., before they host their own three-game series against Grand Canyon next weekend.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

SPORTS | 10

Last-second heroics propel women’s basketball over Long Beach State

Mustang News Staff Report @CPMustangSports

With less than five seconds remaining in overtime, senior guard Ariana Elegado drove into the lane with a chance to take down Long Beach State on the road for the second time in as many years. She released a runner in the lane that found net, putting the Cal Poly women’s basketball team up 58-57 — the final score — with just 2.7 seconds left.

Last season, the Mustangs defeated the 49ers in similar fashion in the Walter Pyramid, winning 107-102 in another overtime matchup.

Long Beach State entered Big West play with a 13-1 record, enough to earn them some Top 25 votes, but they have gone 7-4

in conference play, tied with Cal Poly in third place.

The game was back and forth for the entire 40 regulation minutes. The Mustangs were down 37-30 late, but went on a 12-0 run with less than three minutes left to take the lead. The 49ers would respond well, however, evening up the score and sending it to overtime where Elegado’s heroics came to fruition.

Despite the game-winner, Elegado had a sub-par game by her lofty standards, dropping in just five points while dishing out five assists.

Sophomore forward Hannah Gilbert led the side in scoring with 16 points and eight rebounds, while freshman guard Dynn Leaupepe added a double-double with 10 points and

12 rebounds.

There were positives and negatives to take away for Cal Poly. On the good side, the Mustangs’ defense held the 49ers to 27 percent shooting from the field, one of the lower marks on the year. On the other hand, Cal Poly committed 24 turnovers, a number that is going to have to decline as the Mustangs head into the Big West tournament.

With five games left in regular season play, Cal Poly sits two games behind first place Hawaii and a half-game back of second-place UC Davis.

The Mustangs have a break until Thursday when they’ll return home to face Cal State Fullerton on Feb. 19 and then UC Riverside on Feb. 21. Both games are in Mott Athletics Center.

DAVID E. HOLMES | COURTESY PHOTO