My Child Magazine Issue 103 April 2020

MAGAZINE.COM.AU

ISSUE 103 - APRIL 2020

technology & children

EDITOR IN CHIEF

Bianca Medina ART DIRECTOR

Bianca Medina DEPUTY EDITOR

Caroline Meyer CONTRIBUTORS

Sheree Hoddinett Amy Adeney Lance Green Jessica Lewis Shari Sirotnak Kristina Paparo Kelly Sikkema McKaela Lee Jelleke Vanooteghem Annie Spratt Marcos Paulo Prado Thiago Borges Gustavo Fring J Carter

CONTACT

My Child Magazine North Parramatta NSW Sydney Australia +614 11 572 877 editorial@mychildmagazine.com.au

Contents 6

38

82

The Benefits Of Technology

Caring For Your Body During

Dad Read - Stay-at-Home-Dads

12

Pregnancy

46

88

Natural Nappy Rash Relief,

Real Relationship Goals

Little Innoscents Organic Intensive

96

Limiting Tech Use!

16 The Connection Between Screen

Soothing Cream - Why You Need It!

52

Time And Development

20

fears: instinct or learned?

Technology Milestones For Kids

30 Globalisation May Bring Changes To Learning

58 Get The Look Interiors

68 Breastfeeding A Toddler

WRITTEN BY: CAROLINE MEYER

34 Book Reviews

76 Toy Reviews

Blogger -Failing And Flailing And Still Rocking It!!

102 Fashion

114 Fashion Feature - Iris & Wool

124 Mother’s Day Gift Guide

136 Recipes

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MY CHILD DIRECTORY

DISCLAIMER: It My Child Magazine and mychildmagazine.com.au are wholly owned by My Child Magazine (ABN 79 167 787 662). No other parties or individuals have any financial interest in the company or in My Child or mychildmagazine.com.au. My Child contains general information only and does not purport to be a substitute for health and parenting advice. Readers are advised to seek a doctor for all medical and health matters. The publisher and authors do not accept any liability whatsoever in respect of an action taken by readers in reliance on the recommendations set out in this magazine. Reproduction of any material without written permission by the publisher is strictly forbidden. We cannot accept responsibility for material lost or damaged in the post or for any unsolicited manuscripts and photographs. All reasonable efforts have been made to trace copyright holders.

Bianca Medina editor-in-chief Editor’s Letter Hello Peeps.

Well, well, well, hasn’t it been a month!

I’m not even sure where to begin! Firstly, anyone that has been impacted by COVID -19, just know that you are not alone. Many of us have had our worlds turned upside down and are suffering to some degree because of this pandemic, but hopefully we all get to take away a lesson from this experience that we can pass on to the next generation, I’m just not sure what that is yet!!

So, with all the chaos happening in the world right now, one thing that I’ve been super grateful for is the additional quality time I’ve got to spend with my daughter. I’ve loved having her at home again and hanging out, giggling and just being silly in general, but there is one thing that I’ve HATED and yes, I’m using the word “HATE” is the terrifying chore called home schooling.

My goodness, what a s*&t fight it has been. It’s been hard, frustrating and has made both Max and I cry on multiple occasions. I’m not qualified to parent let alone teach, so whoever thought up this idea needs a good dose of reality of what home schooling really entails. My daughter is a kindergarten student, you can’t just pop her front of a worksheet or device and leave her alone, expecting her to get on with it. No, you need to guide and answer all the questions and there are plenty of them, home schooling is not a 6 hr day like a school day, no, this takes up the whole bloody day, yes I’m talking about a full 6hrs and anywhere up to 8hrs, Monday to Friday and with some weekend work included.

We gave it a good shot and by week 3 we had it down pat, but I was failing miserably at work. I had the choice of being a great mum/teacher or failing at work, there was no way I was going to be able to do both successfully. I chose to be a great mum/teacher, I’ve also decide to send my daughter back to school full time for term 2. This way I hopefully can go back to be a great mum that is also great at her job!

Until Next Month

Bianca oxo

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Zuru Pets Alive Boppi the Llama $25.00 bigw.com.au

Fantastically Great Women Who Saved the Planet $14.99 booktopia.com.au

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Playtex 18 Hour Ultimate Lift & Support Wirefree Bra $54.95 curvy.com.au

Radio Control Boxing Robots $29 kmart.com.au

the benefits of technology written by: caroline meyer

There are pros and cons to exposing children to technology. The solution may perhaps lie in moderation. Too much of a good thing is generally bad for you. You can go to the extreme and not expose your children to technology at all until they are much older, but that would mean restricting yourself and the entire household as well. It would also limit who your children can stay with if you are wanting to enforce the restriction quite strictly.

Complete removal of technology may hamper your child and reduce their coping mechanisms and earning potential down the road as also everything revolves around technology today. You could also be cutting off their skill building and restricting their personal and emotional growth and their interactions with peers.

The best way for children to benefit from technology may be a delicate balancing act. You want to expose them to technology for education and development preventing their exposure from becoming excessive and actually hindering their progress and development.

Technology allows kids to expand their imaginations and demonstrate creativity wherever they may be. In the past kids had paper and coloured pencils and crayons to show their artistic sides. This may not always be easy to cart around and was perhaps a little limiting. Tablets, PCs and mobile phones allow them to access apps and programs to express themselves even when you are away from home. Yes, you could pack crayons and a colouring book, but now they can create 3D animations and create anything that comes in to their heads. Interacting with tech in this way may also lead them in to fields such as mobile app and video game designs when they are older.

Social media, online gaming and many other forms of relationship building occur online today. As children get older, much of their interaction takes place on platforms where some technology is needed. Kids who do not own any devices may find their 8

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interactions are limited. For many children, social media, video games and other technology are hobbies. It is also useful to be able to interact with like-minded kids that share similar or the same hobbies. Tech also allows for live chat, so your child can have a play date with a friend without having to leave your home. This is perfect for times when movement is restricted such as when children are ill. Technology also allows them to collaborate with their peers on projects and schoolwork. Some friends become online friends only, but the bond may last many years.

Technology may empower your child and given them a sense of independence. They are able to conceive of projects, do research, get input from others and carry out the project on their own. This can lead to a feeling of pride and accomplishment and improve independence and free thought. Having an upbringing that include some technology reduces the fear of failure when working online and encourages experimentation. This could lead to trying new things and potentially improving tech in the future. If nothing else, they won’t be scared of any new tech that is introduced.

Many online games encourage perseverance and problem solving. Kids learn to make decisions and manage in the aftermath, learning that there are consequences to actions and taking responsibility for their choices. Most games have levels and children are encouraged to complete levels to move up and improve their characters etc. This encourages perseverance and determination. They learn to change their problem solving in different games and learn that they need to change their approach to a problem depending on the situation they are in.

With unemployment increasing all over the world, technology may assist you child in developing skills or starting a business based on technology on the future. Learning to code, developing app or programs, creating content, setting up websites and many MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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more aspects can be learned from a young age. Setting up a site to retail items can lead to a fulltime business for a young person.

Almost any job, even offline, requires some knowledge of technology. Being exposed to technology at a young age allows for easier learning and expression of their knowledge as they get older. Remember to check the guidelines of tech exposure for youngsters, with babies not being exposed under the age of 2.

Children do not learn from books the way they used to do the past. Today much of their knowledge is gleaned from internet research. As the technology starts to move towards a more immersive form, virtual reality will eventually become part of the norm. Eventually children may even be able to “visit” the past or places of interest without having to leave their home.

This is also a great way to learn as seeing and hearing creates a more vivid memory and is easier to retain. Teaching your children how to manage their time on the internet and restricting the amount of time spent, allows them to learn to prioritize and do things more efficiently as well. Some supervision would be needed to allow time for “work” (school research/homework etc.) and “play” (games/socializing/pet projects etc.).

These are just a few of the benefits of technology which may also include eye-hand co-ordination improvement as well as reaction times and critical thinking. There are many benefits to allowing your children to become comfortable with technology.

Technology is not going away and it is almost guaranteed that they will need to have quite a bit of know-how if they are to succeed in the future. As with all good things, put in reasonable restrictions and watch your child flourish.

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LIMITING TECH USE! Written By: Caroline Meyer

We know that as parents we have to provide guidance for our children. We put a lot of time, effort and love helping them navigate the everyday world we live in. We also have to offer guidance when it comes to their interactions with the virtual one. Children do need to be taught to navigate through the digital landscape. They will need to learn habits and skills that will help them in the future as they spend more and more time online. You have to know where to draw the line though. At different ages, children can be allowed different access to technology so that they develop in a healthy way and there is still plenty of time for all the other activities they need to reach their milestones.

Technology can be empowering. There are games, apps and tools for children that can be engaging and help them develop their creativity. It can also help them stay connected socially. Children that learn about technology when they are younger will also be prepared for entering into a workforce that relies heavily on technology in the future.

There does however, need to be a balance. Too much time online is not always a good thing.

Children can also view inappropriate content if they are not supervised and monitored. Screen time and content should be age appropriate and offer some benefits.

Games and social media can also become addictive to impressionable young people.

Older children can be taught that they need to have time for physical activity and face to face connection with people and not to spend all of their waking moments in front of a screen. For younger children, you have to set appropriate guidelines and monitor usage as they may not be

able to find a balance themselves. All children are not the same and not all families are the same. Striking a balance can be quite difficult. You have to monitor the effects that technology is having on your family and cut back where it looks to be detrimental.

Some of the signs that your children may not be using technology in a healthy way is if they become too dependent on it. If they are unhappy or bored every time, they are not allowed access to their devices or if they have tantrums or screaming matches with you when you set limits or prevent access for a period of time, they may be using tech in an unhealthy way. If there is minimal personal interaction or their tech use is interfering with school or sleep or they completely lose interest in hobbies and sports in order to spend more time online, they may require intervention. This is something that will need to be monitored often as the children grow and as technology changes.

Some of the things you need to look out for and be aware of when they are using devices to access the internet is that they may be looking at content that is not appropriate based on their age. They may also spend a lot of time on empty content such as videos instead of interactive content that can help with their creativity and learning. Check your privacy settings, especially on social media to avoid having strangers contact younger children online. Discuss privacy and password protection as well as not disclosing any information to people they do not know. Make sure they know to inform you if they are receiving messages or content that make them feel uncomfortable in any way. Set screen time limits based on age and ensure these are followed. Schedule time for family and activities away from screens. Set limits and enforce them.

As a parent, it is always good to set the standard and be a role model to our children. If you are permanently online or on the phone or playing games on your PC, your children are likely to notice and probably emulate what you do. They may also find themselves competing for your attention against a device. Practise mindful technology use and your children will be encouraged to do the same. If you set a no screen time rule during meals and family time, you need to switch off your cell phone and step away from the PC yourself as well. These interactions with you offer far more than any game can when it comes to a variety of 14

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“As a parent, it is always good to set the standard and be a role model to our children. If you are permanently online or on the phone or playing games on your PC, your children are likely to notice and probably emulate what you do.”

developmental aspects. You can choose the times to limit your own device use but try and avoid bringing digital distractions into family time.

You don’t always need to bring the office home with you and it is often okay to switch off your phone sometimes. Checking your email can wait until you finish the game of “eye spy” with your 5-year-old.

Avoid bad habits such as texting when walking or driving. Don’t share personal information on social media for everyone to peruse and comment on. Demonstrating safe behaviour helps your child learn what is and what isn’t okay. They learn far better from being shown what to do than simply being instructed in what they should do.

If you switch off for family time, your child also learns that they are important. Discuss the family rules with them and set the limits with them. If they know why the limits are in place and can discuss the limits with you, they are more likely to follow the rules.

Get involved. Play online games with your children or sit with them and watch as they play.

Check the content they access and suggest content that could help them. Turn it into a bonding experience while vetting the content your child is interacting with. If they know more than you, let them teach you. You will learn more and they get a confidence boost. It might not be a huge amount of fun for you if you have vastly different online experiences, but it is still quality time together.

Remember, children are different, so what works for one child might not work for another. Work on figuring out what each child needs and tailor your approach based around age, personality and online time required.

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THE CONNECTION SCREEN TIME AND

N BETWEEN D DEVELOPMENT written by: CAROLINE MEYER

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There has been quite a bit of research over the years pertaining to child development and the amount of time spent in front of a screen. Screen time before the age of 3 years old showed a correlation with many missed early childhood development milestones when they were assessed at the age of 5.

Key areas that had noticeable developmental delays included: motor skills, communication, social skills and problem-solving. In some studies, it is quite clear that one of the main reasons for the developmental milestones being missed was directly related to long periods spent in front of a screen. While this is not definitive, it does show that screen time should be limited and any time spent in front of a screen should be with a caregiver and supervised or engaged with together.

While it is difficult to manage many other factors that can be involved in childhood developmental delays such as poverty, managing screen time is something most parents can do. This allows parents to also spend more time interacting with their children, which shows improvements in learning and hitting the milestones later on.

Many children show a deficit in developmental areas such as motor skills, communication, language and socioemotional health by the time they start school. Changing the outlook on screen time can result in a change to this trend.

If parents understand how detrimental it is to use technology as a babysitter or pacifier for their children, the more they might look at other options that can improve long term outcomes.

A long-term study measured screen time as the ages of 2, 3 and 5 years.

Childhood development outcomes were also assessed at these ages by the parents and study doctors. A pattern emerged that could predict the outcome at 3 years and 5 years from looking at the screen time for previous periods.

This pattern made it obvious that extensive screen time resulted in greater delays as the children got older. The study included an assessment at two of simple word combinations in groups of two or three such as “cat gone now�.

At age five, they would need to be able to put at least 4 or 5 words into a sentence. Other skills were also tested at 2, 3 and 5. While the study could not definitively prove causation, the correlation was very strong. To prove causation would require a randomized controlled trial which is not ethical to do on children as large groups would need to be exposed to different amounts of screen time over a period of time. Having a good idea that this is detrimental to their development, this type of study cannot be done in an ethical way. The closest that studies of this type can get is to show the probability of screen time being a factor in slower development in small children. Each child in the study showed distinct underachievement when exposed to larger amount of screen time than those that weren’t. While not all factors were the same, there was a pattern when looking at outcomes after different levels of screen time.

Other factors such as socioeconomic group was not taken into account, nor 18

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factors such as lack of sibling, single parent households etc.

Many studies in the past focused on-screen time and developmental outcomes at a certain point in time. This could not be seen as being conclusive at all. These studies could not show whether the developmental delays were in place before the excessive screen time or developed afterwards (or as a result of). Research done over longer periods that assessed children at different levels and checked the screen time patterns were then able to predict further developmental delays based on the amount of time spent in front of a screen. It was also noted that children that were already experiencing developmental delays are often expected to spend even more time in front of a screen to “learn�, in an effort to boost them to reach their milestones. While many other factors can also hinder children from reaching their developmental milestones such as socioeconomic factors, parenting, physical activity and sleep, excessive screen time is most assuredly a factor in this area as well.

The impact further down the line for these children is yet to be assessed. While there is some indication that the right kind of screen time in later development can assist children in reaching milestones and developing independence, in early childhood, this appears to be far more a negative than a positive influence.

So how much screen time is too much? Children in industrialised countries seem to be more at risk than those in developing countries where technology may not always be available in many households. The study looked at children in countries where technology is readily available and the amount of time differed from 2 hours to 4 hours per day approximately.

Children should not spend more than an hour a day in front of the screen and should be watching high-quality programming or educational shows. Children in the study that showed negative effects were watching a screen for 2.4 hours at 24 months, 3.6 hours at 36 months and 1.6 hours at 60 months on average.

The quality of what was being watched was difficult to determine as screen time was over a wide variety of devices.

Screen time spent without input from caregivers has little to no benefit for children under 30 months. They cannot apply what they see on screen to real life. Where screen time was shared with caregivers, there was more interaction and the little ones were engaged in conversation and this can improve language development. Children are also able to learn from the experiences when a parent or caregiver watches with them as this is a very different experience to mindlessly watching on their own.

Children from birth to five years old are at the most risk as this is when most of childhood development happens. While some of the digital media can be stimulating and fun for little ones, it does appear to interfere with them reaching their developmental milestones. Limiting screen time at a young age seems like something that any parent can do to try and help their children reach their full potential.

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TECHNOLOGY MILESTONES FOR KIDS WRITEN BY: CAROLINE MEYER

There is still an ongoing debate around how much screen time is too much. There are people on both ends of the extreme. Parents that use technology to babysit their kids and have them on tablets, phones or watching TV most of their awake time. Parents that refuse to allow kids to touch technology and would never allow them to use a PC or smartphone. While it is recommended that screen time be limited, the world is becoming more and more digital and it is impractical to have your children avoid all contact with technology. The limits for screen time should be age appropriate and should be mitigated with other activities that include movement, bonding, educating and so forth.

It is also important to monitor the screen time as far as possible and even engage along with the child in the enjoyment of technology as far as time allows.

What is quite interesting to note is that more than 42% of children under 8 years old already have access to a tablet or similar technology and this percentage is growing steadily. In comparison, in 2013, only around 7% of children 0 to 8 years old had a tablet. Many of these children were using the devices for 2 or more hours a day. At a young age, this is potentially far too much exposure.

Using technology as a development aid or a learning device is far less detrimental than sitting a kid in front of a TV to watch endless, 24

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mindless movies. Digital babysitters such as tablets and TVs are being used more and more to keep children occupied instead of helping them develop and learn. Use apps and programs that allow the child to interact and engage with technology and learn in the process. Using technology can help children learn in different ways than those they are usually exposed to in the classroom.

When looking at “screen time� it is important to note that not all screen time is equal. Time spent learning and developing, interacting with technology, trumps time spent lounging on the couch watching a movie for the 40th time. While that may quieten a child down before bed, there is very little other use for it, making it less valuable than tech time that teaches. It is important to look at the best tech and apps based on a child’s age and level of development.

Screen time for babies under the age of 18 months is of no real use unless it is a short period spent interacting with others such as video chatting with relatives. Little ones do not get much benefit from tech in any other way and are unable to use it themselves independently until they are around 1.5 years old. They can then be taught some basics and be allowed to use minimal tech, under constant supervision.

This time can be used to encourage grossMARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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motor skills and the concept of sharing.

Some ideas for introducing toddlers to technology includes: voice chatting or video chatting with family that are far away, playing music to dance to, colour and shape learning apps or video playdates with friends. As they advance you can move to more advanced play such as creating stories and videos to share with family and friends. You can collaborate with your child by adding in music and editing their video or helping put together a stop-motion animation for their story using available apps.

For kids closer to pre-school age, you can start to look at apps and games that promote literacy.

Games that include drag and drop develop movement and some computer literacy skills.

Word games that include sounding out words, finding words and saying words improve spelling and vocabulary. Interactive videos and e-books help promote literacy and engage young children so they retain what they have learned.

School-going children under 12 will have developed a feel for technology by this point and are usually far more comfortable with tech than many adults. At this point they will probably want their own smart phones and will often start to get involved with social media.

They will also likely be playing online games 26

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and interacting with friends using tech. That doesn’t mean that learning through tech has to stop at that point. Limit the screen time being used for games, social interactions and the like and steer their attention to using technology for learning and development as well.

Technology can be used to research their hobbies and interests and delve deeper in to fields that interest them. Encourage them to read e-books and watch videos pertaining to the things they enjoy and even to learn things they may be struggling with at school. Encourage them to take part in programs that help them create their own books or music or get involved in other creative pursuits. Allowing them to dig deeper into things that interest them will encourage self-teaching and prepare them to use tech as a tool for learning.

While there are no set times for each age group of how much time is too much, too much of a good thing is generally bad. For under 18 months, screen time should be severely restricted. After that point, ensure your child is getting all the nurturing they need including movement, bonding, joint playtime, interaction with parents, siblings and friends and that they are developing at the rate they should. You can then decide how much time you should allow them in front of a screen.

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GLOBALISATIO CHANGES TO

ON MAY BRING O LEARNING WRITTEN BY: CAROLINE MEYER

In more Westernised societies, children tend to learn things in a specific way. The toddlers in a Westernised society are known to show curiosity through endless “What” and “Why” questions. This is not the same way that toddlers in many other non-Western cultures learn. With the digitalisation of countries, this way of learning may become more of a norm. In general, we work from some basic principles of how intelligent children behave. Children from different cultures and upbringings may not react in the same way even if they are of similar intelligence.

When looking at children from very different backgrounds, in the past they had different ways of seeking knowledge. With globalisation, it has become more obvious that children are starting to seek information in a more western way such as asking What and Why. However, it was noted that when it came to seeking explanations, children in non-western societies may not react in the same way as those in more industrialised countries. Children in more traditional societies may be taught to ask why less often. This is possibly due to the hierarchy in these types of societies and children demanding answers may be seen as challenging authority. In these societies, everyday living is generally stable and predictable. The children tend to learn from observation and as the same things happen all the time, they are able to observe connections between things and need to ask less questions. Observational learning is well documented and researched and shows how these children learn in a way that does not require asking too many questions.

They are also able to watch what others do and mimic without any formal instructions. Children are able to observe adults in these traditional societies that is generally not possible in western societies. Children from less traditional societies are also distracted from observational learning by the vast number of devices and objects available to them. This may also be why they then need to ask explanatory questions a lot more.

Even when they are very young, children adapt to their economic and social systems and to the technology they are surrounded with. This has no real relation to how intelligent the child is but does show that they express their intelligence in different ways. It is not fair to look at specific behaviours such as requests for information as a measure of intelligence across all levels of society. Information seeking behaviour is 32

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driven more by societal and familial environments as opposed to being a direct measure of curiosity or intelligence. From a young age, children learn how much they are permitted to ask adults. Even in western societies, they learn that certain topics are offensive and learn to not ask these types of questions in future. While asking questions is generally encouraged, children learn to not ask off-limit questions quite quickly. Even in the more traditional societies, children have a variety of different ways of getting information without asking questions that are discouraged. Children develop and learn in different ways and these may not always be the same as the way their parents learned.

As the digital spread continues, it is anticipated to have social and economic impacts and children will have more access to technology from a younger age. This is most likely to result in a change in early development. This will more than likely be very noticeable in non-westernised areas. While the changes are likely to be more gradual in the societies that are governed by authoritarian relationships and there may be a higher resistance to changes especially in response to new technologies, changes will start happening. In western societies, some questions are still off-limits, but even this may change as they have access to technology that can answer these questions for them.

It is important to still be a part of the learning process even while children now have access to vast amounts of technology.

Parents should still practise some of the more traditional methods of teaching such as reading and telling stories to their children. Parents in traditional homes can still teach their children the old methods and the stories that form part of their culture. Learning should still be driven largely by social and familial interactions as opposed to technology. Researchers will need to look into these changes and base investigations on a much wider framework than in previous when trying to determine intelligence and curiosity, taking in to account traditional structures and the changes that technology brings in to these societies. Things are changing and the way children learn are changing along with it. While it may be embraced in varying degrees, it cannot be simply ignored. Changes will occur and the global way of learning may become very similar across all societies eventually.

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BOOK e

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by: Amy Adeney from Busy Bookworms

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GOODNIGHT GLOW WORMS

BY AURA PARKER

From Aura Parker, the c r e at or of t he gorgeous Meerkat Spla sh, c om e s a cuddly, snuggly bedtime b ook ab out a group of colourf ul gl ow wor m s who get up to all sorts of m i sc hi e f at lights- out time. T he b ook i s full of joyous, playf ul i l l ust r at i ons which can also be a g r e at way t o introduce or remind yo ung r e ad e r s about colours.

Th e b ou n c in g rh y me a n d en d ea r i n g st ory will b e a h it wit h r ea d er s a g ed 2 a n d u p , a n d t h e p erf ec t en d i n g wi l l sen d lit t le on es h a p p ily o f f to s l eep .

M AN R AISE S BOY

BY ROB STURROCK

Recently there has been an explosion o f l i te r a t u r e aim ed a t em p o wering a nd e m b o l d en in g yo u n g g ir ls – but w ha t a r e w e t ellin g yo u n g b o ys ? In t his b oo k , j ou r n alis t Ro b S t u r rock gr a p p l e s w i th t h e d a ily c h allenges o f r a i s i n g b o ys wh o c an t h r ive in t he c u r r e n t er a . T h r o u g h ext en sive r e s e a r c h a n d in t er views wit h dads do in g i t d i f f er en t ly - in c lu d in g Tony She l d on , A d am Liaw an d Bernie Sha k e s h a f t - S t u r r o c k exp lo r es a ne w e r a o f f a t h er in g t h at b ala nces st r e n g t h a n d vu ln er ab ilit y, a llo wing m e n to v oi c e t h eir in s ec u r it ies and unc e r ta i n ti e s , an d en c o u r a ging t hem t o t r u l y c h er is h t h eir fa m ilies.

M a n R a i s e s B oy is at once a c a ll t o a r m s f o r all new fathe rs , an d a g uid i n g h a n d in the maze of lov e, g uil t, a n x i e t y and joy in fathe rhood .

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DAISY RU NS WILD

BY CAZ GOODWIN & ASHLEY KING

From the team behind l ast y e ar ’ s fabulous picture book L az y Dai sy comes the next hilarious c hap t e r i n the life of lazy koala Dai sy and he r spritely, stroll- loving f ri e nd J asp e r – and this time, Daisy has gone bonkers! On her daily wal k , she unexpectedly leaps into t he ai r and takes off around the park. C onf use d and embarrassed, Ja sp e r r uns af ter Daisy – interrupti ng a y oga class, ruining a game of c r i c k e t and accidentally pushing poo r p osh Mr s Pallot into the pond! Can J asp e r ge t to the bottom of Daisy’s b e hav i our amidst all of the hullaba l oo?

Th e b ook’s q u irky , colourful illu st ra t ion s a re in st a n t l y en g a g i n g , a n d t h e f u n n y rh y min g sto r y wi l l b e a firm f a v ou rit e wit h rea d er s a g ed 3 a n d u p .b ea u t if u l eggs.

NOT SO MUMSY

BY MARCIA LEONE

P a r e n t i n g i s h a r d , b u t it ’ s also be au ti f u l . F or w o m en w h o have e mb r a c e d mo t h er h o o d b u t also ye a r n to r e ta in a s en s e o f s elf and st yl e , I n s ta g r a m s en s at io n Ma rcia Le o n e (a k a @n o t s o mu ms y) has be en a p i o n eer d r ivin g t h e Mo dern Ma m a m o v e m en t . An d n o w , she ha s w r i tt e n a n d c u r a t ed expert a nd a n e c d ot al ad vic e t o c r eat e a ‘ m o t h e r ’s g r ou p in a b o o k’ .

W it h p o w e r f u l ly uplifting pe rs pe ctiv es f ro m i n s p i r a tional mamas acros s t h e wo rl d , i n cl u d ing Jaime K ing, Te resa Pa lme r , M e g a n G ale and Tammin Surs o k , No t S o Mums y w ill help y ou n a v i g a te p r e gnancy, your firs t yea r and b e y o n d w ith s tyle, humour an d c o nf i d e n ce .

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CARING FOR YOUR BODY DURING PREGNANCY

Written by Caroline Meyer

Pregnancy can bring on many changes in a woman’s body. Some of them fade after having a baby, while some have a lasting effect.

Woman can experience discomfort at various stages of pregnancy. It is possible to alleviate some of the discomfort or to find ways of coping with it.

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Pelvic discomfor t and back pain are common during pregnancy. The way you do activities during the day can also have an impact on the level of discomfor t you experience. W hen you stand, tr y and spread your weight evenly and keep your back straight and shoulders back.

This will help alleviate some of the pelvic discomfor t.

Avoid climbing stairs, walking up hills or climbing up and down ladders as this causes uneven distribution and adds to pelvic strain.

W hen sitting down, tr y and sit with your bottom pushed to the back of the chair and your back as straight as possible.

You can use cushions behind your back for suppor t and may need to put your feet up on a footstool. This will help to reduce the strain on your back, and resulting back pain.

W hen you get off the bed, roll f irstly on to your side, keep your k nees together and sit up on the bed. Lower your legs while lifting yourself with your ar ms to comfor tably get out of bed without back strain. W hen you are sleeping, use pillows between your k nees and under your belly and sleep on your side to reduce discomfor t.

During your pregnancy, especially the later months, it is impor tant to avoid heavy lifting. W hen you do have to lift anything, use your k nees and not your back to pick it up.

Bend your k nees, keep your back straight, brace yourself using your core muscles and lift smoothly. If possible, hold the item close to your body. Do not twist and bend as this is likely to cause immediate strain on the back. Even when doing housework, avoid f lexing your spine as far as possible. Get a longer vacuum pole or get someone else to do it. Work at a comfor table height and avoid having to bend or stretch excessively. Get a trolley for the laundr y basket if you take out a batch of laundr y. Rest whenever you need to. Use a chair to rest while you work or sit at a table to avoid having to bend for long periods of time.

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but you should also tr y not to pick small children up as far as possible as it unbalances your body and creates added strain on the pelvis and back. Rather sit down and have your little one cuddle with you. Get them a small step to help them reach your lap without you having to bend and lift them up. W here possible, have your small child climb into their car seat or pram on their own, if it is safe to do so. This will all help with reduced pressure on your aching back.

The pressure on your blood vessels can lead to varicose veins during pregnancy. Suppor t your legs by wearing suppor t hose when they ache. Sit down to rest whenever possible and avoid standing for long periods of time as this exacerbates the condition. Tr y and lie down for a rest during the day when possible. Wear shor ts without a heel, that are comfor table and suppor tive. W hen varicose veins appear in the pelvic f loor you will need to wear f itted under wear and possibly a sanitar y pad to provide added suppor t. Tr y and spend rest periods lie down and you can also tr y cold compresses or ice packs in the area to reduce the swelling. Pelvic f loor exercises may also provide a small amount of relief.

Leg cramps are another common complaint. These can occur in the thighs, legs and even feet. They seem to occur more frequently at night but can occur at any time. Tr y and rest lying down at least once or twice a day. Light exercise and spending a little time walking can help alleviate the cramps. Make sure that you are hydrated and drin k around 2 litres of water per day. W hen sitting down, f lex your k nees and move your an kles in a circle to help keep the muscles and joints loose. For leg cramps, stretch out your calf muscles to relax the cramp.

Some of the exercises you can do during pregnancy will help during and after the bir th of your baby. These

can include Kegel or pelvic f loor exercises which help strengthen the inter nal muscles that assist with bladder and bowel control. They also aid in sexual f unction. These muscles provide stability and suppor t your pelvic joints and should be f ir m. These exercises are fairly easy to do and can be done at any time. Tighten the muscles by squeezing the inter nal muscles while tilting upward. All muscles in the area should get a slight workout. Hold the contraction for a few seconds and relax. You should feel the muscles release. You can also practice this by stopping and restar ting a urine f low midstream. Tr y and do around 10 contractions a few times a day.

Tr y pelvic tilt exercises to strengthen your core. This will help with your post ure and keep the t ummy muscles strong.

You can do these exercises lying down, standing or while using a gym ball. Feet should be f lat and k nees bent. Tilt your hips backwards until the cur ve of your lower back straightens out. Pull your lower abdominal area (below the belly button) in towards the spine. Hold for as long as you can and release. Ensure you breath properly during the exercise. This can also help with pelvis and back pain.

Tr y various relaxation methods to reduce tension and stress which can also result in added pain on the back, neck and spine during pregnancy. You can also use relaxation techniques during labour to help you cope through contractions and reduce pain levels. Being able to relax, even a little, during labour can help you conser ve energy and have a better experience. You can do this through breathing exercises, tension and release of muscles, focusing on something specif ic, listening to soft music or any other method for helping you relax your body. Once you have chosen a method that works for you, practice it regularly, especially before bed so that you are able to sleep better. You can do this at any time you feel heightened levels of tension during the day.

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NATURAL NAPPY RASH RELIEF, LITTLE INNOSCENTS ORGANIC INTENSIVE SOOTHING CREAM - WHY YOU NEED IT!

There are a few things that you hear from parents about parenting before you embark on the wonderful journey yourself, but until you are faced with some of these little problems, you’ll never completely understand the stress they can cause you and your baby!

LET’S TALK ABOUT NAPPY RASH, WHAT IS IT AND HOW DOES BABY GET IT? It doesn’t matter how well you look after baby’s bottom, nappy rash is part the parenting package.

It’s going to happen at some point of your newborn’s life and beyond and for those parents that already have a little bundle of joy, you probably know what I’m talking about!

The most common cause of nappy rash is prolonged contact with wetness. The longer your baby’s bottom has contact with a wet or soiled nappy, the higher the risk is for baby to develop nappy rash.

There are many other causes of nappy rash that include: • • • • • • •

sensitive skin skin conditions eg: eczema or psoriasis chafing and or rubbing lotions, soaps or bubble bath baby wipes diarrhoea or other illness wearing plastic pants that stop airflow

SO, WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE? Nappy rash can be a little overwhelming to look at. Your baby could have little red inflamed patches or the whole area could be red. Your baby’s skin might feel hot to touch and will more than likely be sore when you wipe it. There could also be pimples, spots and or blisters.

HOW TO PREVENT NAPPY RASH Preventing nappy rash in the first place is the best way to deal with it.

However the chances are, that you and bub will still likely experience nappy rash at some point during your early parenthood journey.

Here are some handy hints to help with nappy rash prevention:

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• CHANGE – Make sure you change your baby’s wet or soiled nappy ASAP! Young babies should be changed 10-12 times per day and older babies 6-8 times per day.

• CLEAN – Ensure you always clean the whole nappy area when changing your baby and always wipe back to front. (If your baby has nappy rash, it best to use cotton wool soaked in lukewarm water to prevent further irritation to their sore and inflamed skin or all natural baby wipes). Don’t forget to thoroughly pat dry.

• NAPPY CHOICE - Disposable Nappies are designed to prevent nappy rash with their superabsorbent material that pulls moisture away from the skin. If you’re a cloth nappy user, make sure you use a nappy liner and above all, avoid using plastic pants as they restrict airflow.

• FRESH AIR – As often as possible, let your baby’s skin breath. You can lie baby on a towel without a nappy and let their skin get some fresh air.

SO HOW DO YOU TREAT NAPPY RASH? Treating nappy rash with a nappy rash or barrier cream is the first step you will have to take. With so many choices, it’s hard to know which one is the right one to choose. We recently reviewed the Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream and there are so many things to love about this cream. Here are just some of the things we loved: • Firstly, it’s 100% natural and is made with certified organic ingredients.

• Gentle enough to be used on sensitive skin but still effective to use on nappy rash.

• It’s a rich moisturising cream that both soothes and hydrates the skin.

• Ideal for all ages and skin types, including newborns.

• It has anti-bacterial and anti-inflammatory properties that help to calm and may assist with a range of skin irritations Containing aloe vera, shea butter and avocado oil, the Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream helps to calm your baby delicate skin, relieving irritation and redness. With the added healing benefits of Calendula and Rosewood oil, it can also help to quicken the renewal of damaged skin cells.

Not only is the Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream great for nappy rash, it’s also an extremely versatile cream and can be used for treating sunburn, minor cuts as well as dry and itchy skin.

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We had 2 mum’s review Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream and here’s what they had to say:

“My daughter has had nappy rash most of her childhood as she has super sensitive skin and it gets very blotchy and sore between nappy changes. I was given the Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream and was doubtful at first that it would be effective. I’m happy to report though I was happily mistaken. I loved that this cream is easy to apply. It’s not a sticky cream and it glides on very easily which really helped with her bad flare ups. It absorbs into the skin really well and seemed to soothe her rather quickly. I was also delighted that I could use on her grazes as there are still a lot of falls when we are out playing. It’s a great cream with many uses and I would recommend this to all parents”.

- Jessica “My son is 8mths old and I am extremely fussy with the products I use on his skin as he has eczema. I typically purchase only organic products and was delighted to be given the opportunity to test and review the Organic Intensive Soothing Cream by Little Innoscents. Let me start with the packaging, it super cute and bright and with the wooden look flip lid, it even looks organic. The cream itself is super easy to apply and is not sticky like some of the other brands I have used. I was impressed with the way it absorbed into the skin and didn’t leave any sticky residue feeling. I used this on bub’s bottom as well as the areas he was scratching and was impressed that it soothed the skin.

For anyone that wants to use an organic and natural product to treat nappy rash or itchy skin conditions, I would highly recommend the Organic Intensive Soothing Cream by Little Innoscents. I will definitely be purchasing this product and can’t wait to try other products within the Little Innoscents range”.

- Courtney Little Innoscents skincare range is made in Australia with natural and certified organic ingredients. Products are cruelty-free, certified by Australian Certified Organic (ACO) and have been trusted by Australian mums for over 10 years. You can purchase Little Innoscents Organic Intensive Soothing Cream from littleinnoscents.com.au, Chemist Warehouse, My Chemist and Big W. If your baby has a rash that doesn’t go away, its best to consult with your paediatrician, doctor, pharmacist or child health nurse for further advice.

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fears: instinct or learned?

Written By: Caroline Meyer

Research has been done related to the fear of heights, fear of snakes and spiders as well as the fear of strangers. Most of these fears seem to start from around the 8 to 10-month mark. But is this evolution or learned? Things that threaten survival can easily be chalked up to being an instinctive fear and perhaps being hardwired into humans from birth. This may in fact not be entirely true. Fears are easily learned and once they are, removing the fear becomes extremely difficult. There is research on both instinctual and learned fears but the theory of it being due to evolution may be based on flawed studies. Current research suggests that fear is picked up from adults and other young children and we are not born with it.

In the research done on the topic, it was discovered that infants actually demonstrated interest in spiders, snakes and so forth and actually tried to interact with them. There was no fear and even if they were shown images of the creatures, along with fearful voices, if anything, they showed more attention. They would reach out to try and touch the images. When shown spiders and snakes in tanks, they were quite interested and spent time peering into the tanks. Even when confronted with steep drops, they were likely to peer over the edge and extend hands or feet over to try and explore it. There was no obvious fear response.

When it came to strangers, babies would smile and offer toys in most instances. Even in an unfamiliar environment, infants did not react negatively to strangers. Infants did show interest in strangers as well as snakes and spiders, but the usual fear symptoms were not present. Avoiding the edge is not the same as being afraid of heights. Exploring the drop is not necessarily negative. In infants a raised heartbeat might also indicate interest as opposed to fear. The increase in heartbeat needs to be taken in conjunction with body language such as whether they are smiling or showing agitation or distress. As we get older, there may be a greater fear depending on the size or depth of a drop off. In infants, the reaction tends to remain the same no matter the fall distance. Avoiding the drop is perhaps an instinct for survival, but it is not a fear. Showing some nervousness around strangers or being wary is not necessarily due to fear. They may also react differently depending on the environment they are in and how they are approached. The faster a stranger approaches and attempts to touch or pick up the child, the more likely it is that they respond negatively. That being said, more than 40% of babies will stay neutral or show a positive response even when picked up by a stranger in an unfamiliar environment.

A lot of the responses seen seem to relate more to the child’s temperament and abilities as opposed to being a general response.

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As children advance in their abilities, they are more likely to respond in different ways to the same predicament. Infants that are just starting to crawl or walk will often not stop at the point of a drop off, where more experienced babies are likely to stop and explore the drop by extending arms or legs into the drop or over the gap. They will also start looking for ways to bypass the obstacle and will become a lot more cautious. Babies that are generally more nervous or temperamental will often react more negatively and show signs of fear more readily than babies with a calmer temperament.

Most of the research has centred around the fear of strangers, heights, snakes and spiders even though these have clearly been shown not to be prevalent in babies and young children. Even in adults, the fear heights, snakes and spiders is under 6% of the population that experience an intense fear or phobia. While social anxiety affects around 11% of people, the fear of strangers on its own is extremely rare. On further investigation, the fear of spiders, snakes, strangers and heights that are found in almost 90% of preschool children has developed as a result of media and having the fear instilled in them by adults (usually parents and caregivers).

Children will also pick up cues from their parents of what they need to fear. Research done displaying a drop of to an infant and then having the child go near the same drop with the parent showing a happy or fearful response clearly showed the influence of adult body language/facial expression on the child learning to fear.

Actual fear does not cause defined responses on its own. The brain interprets the significance of what is happening including physical changes such as an increased heart rate and increased sweating. This response and the preparation of the body to handle it is stored in the brain and activated when the mind perceives the threat to be imminent. This learned response then manifests as fear.

Future research may look at the definition of fear from an even more in-depth perspective. Introducing physical or behavioural responses along with the negative emotional reaction. Responses would also need to increase incrementally along with the increase in the threat. It might also be useful to examine other fears and how they are manifested as well as different responses from a wide variety of infants and small children to get a better determination of what fear actually is. The reactions at different ages may also help determine when fears may be instinctive and when they are learned behaviour.

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INTERIORS

get the look

nursery Photo: Circu

White Wooden Cot $129 kmart.com.au

Cloud Pendant Light $80 ebay.com.au

Beech Wood Elephant Chair $351 smallable.com 62

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Bahar Stool $219.95 zanui.com.au

Totit Beige And Black Spotted Round Jute Rug $239 missamara.com.au

Crescent Moon & Star Pillow $39 each etsy.com/au

Giant White Polar Bear $91 ebay.com.au Seigaiha Linen Cot Quilt $149 templeandwebster.com.au MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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k i d s Photo: woodyoubuy

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Neutral Rainbow Wall Sticker $102 etsy.com/au Home Republic Natural 1 Drawer Bedside Table $269.99 adairs.com.au

Wall bookshelf $57 woodyoubuy.com.au

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Sol Aroma Diffuser $89 templeandwebster.com.au

Willow Double Bed $239 fantasticfurniture.com.au

Ribbed Base Vase $10 kmart.com.au Grimm’s Stacking Wooden Rainbow $60 leoandbella.com.au

Ostrich Feathers, 10 Pieces $36 etsy.com/au

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BREASTFEEDING A TODDLER Written by: Caroline Meyer

Many people stop breastfeeding early on as they return to work or have other commitments that necessitate other people being able to feed their infant during the day. Many mothers enjoy the closeness and comfort of breastfeeding their baby and you can actually breastfeed your little one as long as you want. While breastfeeding a toddler may not be that common, there is a lot of official support for feeding your toddler after the age of one (extended breastfeeding). There are many benefits to extended breastfeeding and if both you and your toddler want to do so, you can continue to breastfeed comfortably for two years or more as long as your infant is thriving and receiving all the nutrition they need from their general diet.

The Benefits Extended breastfeeding offers a nutritional boost to toddlers, especially those that are a bit picky about what they will or won’t eat. Studies have shown that mothers breast milk may actually change based on the infant’s needs. Make sure your toddler still gets offered healthy food and snacks as a first option and breast feed as a supplement. Breastfeed after a meal and not before so that the toddler is hungry and will want to try the solid foods first. Breastfeeding may help fill in any nutrient deficiencies.

Breast milk contains antibodies that can help boost your toddler’s immune system. This can help reduce the risk of allergies, ear infections, colds and common childhood ailments. Breastfeeding also provides comfort to a child, which will help if they are feeling a little ill or upset. If they have gastric distress, sometimes 70

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breastmilk will be the only substance that stays down.

Infants that are breastfed for longer show long term health benefits such as a reduced risk of high cholesterol and high blood pressure. They also have a lower risk of diabetes and obesity. Toddlers that have been breastfed are also likely to be smarter than their peers, possibly due to the additional DHA or Omega-3 fatty acids found in breast milk.

While some toddlers may be a bit clingy, in general, toddlers that are breastfed are more confident and secure in exploring as they have the comfort and safety of their mom’s breast to return to when they need to.

They are also less likely to use dummies, blankies or other emotional comfort devices as breastfeeding gives skin to skin contact and can calm an upset toddler effectively. Breastfeeding also allows for calm, comfortable bonding time for mom and little one during the day and perfect for reducing hyperactivity before naptime. This also helps give mom some rest during the day.

Breastfeeding also helps reduce the risk of certain types of cancers such as ovarian and breast cancer in adult women. Breastfeeding also helps you maintain a healthy weight as some of your caloric intake is being passed on to your breastfeeding toddler.

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later or stop doing some of the activities you were planning for after baby was born. You have to plan your day around feeding your toddler.

It will be more difficult to breastfeed an active infant once they are running around than it was to feed a baby. While you might be comfortable with feeding your toddler when they want or after every mealtime, but your little one might decide they want something different. They may also be a lot wigglier and squirmier and make feeding in public a lot more complicated.

You may also experience backlash and criticism from people, but as it is your choice, you don’t have to engage in the discussion. If you feel the need to stem the criticism, you can indicate that many doctors actually recommend extended breastfeeding.

Keeping the Balance By the age of 12 months, most toddlers should be getting the bulk of their nutrition from sold food.

You no longer have to breastfeed according to a strict schedule as you would have when breastmilk was the sole source of nutrition. How and when you breastfeed your toddler will depend on you and your toddlers needs at this point. Don’t breastfeed before meals and allow the meal to settle for a bit before allowing them to breastfeed. Don’t feed meals on your lap but rather in a chair so there is a clear delineation and they become comfortable eating at the table. You can try and set a routine for breastfeeding, but usually it is easier to go along with your toddlers needs at this point instead of adhering to a strict schedule. You can teach your child a non-verbal cue to let you know when he would like to breastfeed as opposed to demanding 72

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verbally or grabbing at your breasts or shirt. If your child indicates they want to breastfeed, but you are unable to do so at that point, offer a healthy snack or drink in the meantime and let them know you will do so when it is possible. You can also express milk and have it with you when you are out if you prefer not to breastfeed in public.

Tips for Breastfeeding Toddlers Getting situated to breastfeed with a baby is a lot easier than breastfeeding a toddler. You may have to experiment with a few positions that feel comfortable for you and your little one. Most toddlers seem to prefer a sitting position on your lap with an arm behind for stability. There is no defined position and you can work out what suits you best. You may choose to breastfeed mornings, evening and at bedtime and express bottles for during the day especially as a working mom, or if you are happy to breastfeed at any time during the day, that is also up to you.

You can decide when the right time to wean will be.

Most toddlers will wean themselves and slowly but surely stop wanting to breastfeed. You may decide to wean them earlier than they want to and this may require a discussion with your toddler in words they can understand. Offer alternatives and let them know that you will still be there for them. Have extra snuggle time and one on one time to facilitate bonding and security and alleviate fears due to the changes.

Celebrate them beginning a “big kid� with their own mug or something similar to make the transition easier for them.

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T O Y r e v i e w s

by: SHEREE HODDINETT MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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JELLYCAT FRIZZLES BEE

$49.95

4/5

F r iz z le s B e e i s h er e, b u zzin g wit h cheer! This sof t, stripey gold and black b e e has hug e s h i n y e y es , a fr ien d ly s t it c h smile and a squishy cordy tummy - as we l l as st re t c h y f e e l e r s , a p u n ky t u ft o f fur, six squidgy feet and gentle mesh wi ngs. B ut ma k e s u r e y ou lo o k aft er h er , b ec ause these wings won’t get her too f ar on he r o w n. T u m b l y , b u mb ly an d a d o r a b l y tubby! This buzzy little creature is th e hap p i e st lit t le b u m b l e b ee yo u ever d id s ee, and can’t wait to come and play! Her b i g sm i l e w ill b r i g h te n a ny r a in y d a y!

Our V e r d i ct – T h is cute little be e has won me ov er. So ea sy t o d o t h ou gh . I th i n k a s a c hild I h a d a b i t of a fas cination wit h soft t oy s a n d n eed less t o sa y it h a s c on ti n u ed wel l int o m y a d u l t l i f e , haha! There’ s s om et h in g ma jest ic a l a b ou t b ees a n d t h is s o f t l i ttl e b a l l o f g o o d n e s s h a s he r own k ind of ma gic . Wh en my y ou n gest d a u gh t er wa s b o r n , th e b ee b e c am e h e r l i ttle character animal, I t h in k most ly b ec a u se of h er n a me (P h oeb e) . I t’ s kind of co n t i n u ed to s tick with he r ov er t h e y ea rs a n d p a rt of t h e rea son I h a v e a n ev en so f t e r s p o t f o r be es . D on’ t ge t me wron g I’m n ot a h u ge f a n of t h em f ly in g t o o c l o s e to m e o u ts i d e b u t I’ m willing to mak e a n exc ep t ion for t h is on e!

Ava i l abl e fro m: Li l Trea su res, Yellow Octopus 78

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LEAPFROG LEVEL UP AND LEARN CONTROLLER $19.95

4/5

The L e v e l u p & Lea r n Co n t r o ller features six touch screen learning act i v i t i e s t hat in t r o d u c e c o l ou r s , c o u n t in g , r h yming, French phrases and more. Move t he j oy st i c k to t r ig g e r a n i m a l p h r a s es an d s o unds; listen to the questions from the a ni m al s; and let t h e l i g h t g u id e yo u t o t h e c o rrect answers. The four colourful shap e b ut t ons in t r o d u c e s h a p es an d en c o u r a g e exploring numbers. The music button p l ay s t hr e e lea r ni n g s on g s a n d o n e d a n c e t r a ck. A Tiger pal pops up to encourage pl ay t i m e and in t r o d u c e s o p p o s it es .

Our Ve r d i ct – B r ight lights , loud noi ses a n d b u t t on s t o p u sh , it ’s t h e p erfec t to y f o r l i ttl e o n e s! T h a t s a i d , the le arning elemen t is a lso a n a d d ed b on u s. Ev en if y ou r to d d l er i s n ’ t su re w h a t i t a l l means to s tart w ith , t h ey ’ll en joy h ea rin g t h e n oises a n d bei n g a b l e to p ush th e b u t to n s . It’ s als o a great tool t o get y ou n g memb ers of t h e fa mily fa mi l i a r wi th n um be r s a n d counting s o they ge t used t o t h e id ea of rep et it ion . Alt h ou gh I m u s t a d m i t, at f irs t g l a n ce i t k ind of re minded me of a b a b y v ersion of a P la y St a t ion c on t ro l l er ( g etti n g the m s t a r t e d y oung perhaps ? !) but it ’s ed u c a t ion a l b en efit s f a r ou t weigh a n y p o ten ti a l ga m in g s i m i l a r i t ie s !

Ava i l abl e fro m: Ta rget

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VTECH SECRET SAFE DIARY COLOUR $59.95

5/5

S pin, s c r a tc h , t a p a n d s in g yo u r way to learning f un with this interactiv e DJ st at i on f e a t ur i n g y o u r p al, S c o u t . Fo u r m odes of f er a variety of ways to play, teac hi ng A B C s, numb e r s , c ol ou r s an d mu s ic alo n g the way. With a fidget spinner, toggle spe e d c ont r ol sw it ch , f o u r c o lo u r but t o n s , m u s i c t r a c k s elec t io n p age, mixer slider and volume button, t he L e ar n & G r o o v e M i x m a s t er S c o u t a ls o fea t ures 3 0 songs and lots of sound eff ects that t oge t he r he lp c h i l d r e n c r eat e 180 d iffer en t musical combinations.

Our V e r d i ct – L i ttle D J’ s in training will lov e t h is on e! My girls h a v e b een m a s s i v e mu s i c f ans f r o m t h e minute the y could hea r a t u n e in t h e b a c kgrou n d a n d t h is to y d ef i n i tel y c a ug h t t h e i r a ttention. Mus ic and e d u c a t ion ea sily go h a n d -in -h a n d a n d c om b i n i n g th em in a t oy i s a l w a ys a w inne r. My youngest d a u gh t er lov es t o b rea k ou t t h e in str u m en ts ( th e lo ude r , th e b e tter) and belt out a t u n e a n d my eld est lov es t o sin g. Brigh t c o l o u r s , l o ts o f no i s e a n d a fun w ay to le arn, you ’ll d ef in it ely kn ow wh ere y ou r c h ild is i f th i s to y i s aro un d ! I f y o u want to ge t your little on es in t o mu sic , t h is is on e ea sy wa y to d o i t!

Ava i l abl e F r o m : K MAR T

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Stay-At-Home

Dads WRITTEN BY LANCE GREEN

Something that was almost unheard of 40 years ago has increased tremendously over the years. Stay-at-home Dads have more than doubled in the past 30 years, with some of them actually running a business from home at the same time. While this is still a fraction of the number of stay-at-home mums, these men face the same challenges as well as a few more.

Stay-at-home Dads have discovered it isn’t all fun and games.

There are groceries to be bought, laundry and housework to be dine, kids to be fed and entertained as well as the fetching and carrying to school and activities. It takes endurance as you end up being on your feet a lot and seldom get a break during the day. This is more than a fulltime job as it doesn’t really end until sometime after the kids go to bed.

On top of this, there is still a stigma around men that are fulltime caregivers. Some of the parental support groups, which are often composed mainly of women, may not feel comfortable having a man joining in. Their partners may also not appreciate other men socializing with their wives during the day. This can also limit playdates as women might not want to be alone with a male while the children play together. Stay-at-home Dads may feel rejected by their peer groups and may need to persevere harder for acceptance into support groups. This difficulty in making social connections is one of the toughest challenges stay-at-home Dads face. In some areas there may be very few males that are carers and it can be difficult to find others that share the same obstacles, that they can talk to.

Most women who have partners that take care of the children at home while they work out of the house understand the pressure of taking care of the children and appreciate the men who choose to do so. Having someone at home they can rely on may help them grow and prosper in their career choice. This can be of huge benefit to the family as a whole. There is the 84

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benefit of an income and future prospects for the one parent, with security and stability from the other one being at home to attend to the children’s every day needs. It is also important that the working parent give the homemaker added support when they are at home, as well as there being time for the two to be together without the kids as well.

For most stay-at-home Dads, this was a conscious and thought out choice, although there are some that fell in to the role due to job losses or similar situations. After all these years of legislated gender equality, stay-at-home Dads are still facing stigma. They will generally not list their occupation as a “fulltime parent” or “homemaker” even though around 1 in 15 stay at home parents is male.

Although more than 50% of millennial males say that if their spouse was the breadwinner, they would consider staying at home with the kids. The reason this seldom occurs, if it is in fact what they actually believe, is that there is generally still a large income gap between men and women. Women still get paid a lot less on average than their male peers. This makes the choice for the woman to be the one who stays home with the children a lot more common. Most companies will also actively discourage males from taking time off to be with the children and will usually not keep a place open for a father that chooses to spend more than 6 months at home with the children.

Stay-at-home Dads that are able to find groups that are welcoming and allow for groups of parents of any gender to interact and spend time together will usually find the experience more rewarding. Women usually find it easier to talk to other women about their child rearing experiences. Many men will find it uncomfortable to open up to anyone when it comes to questions they may have.

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This will often be reserved for discussion with their partners.

Groups like this encourage open communication and even if they don’t ask questions themselves, they are able to listen in on other questions and perhaps gain insight into challenges they have been facing. There are a few groups for Stay-at-home dads that allow male caregivers to get together with others and share experiences or simply just hang out while the kids play together. This can be very empowering for Dads that are feeling rejected and cut off from their counterparts.

Taking care of children has many ups and downs and involves constant work and vigilance. Stay at home Dads have to learn how to deal with everything and priorities direct needs. If little Jonny has stubbed his toe, the dishes will have to wait until it’s been attended to. A clean floor can be a mess 10 minutes later.

This is all part of the experience and a set routine can help with most tasks but the unexpected can be dealt with as it occurs.

Most men find this side of things difficult to deal with as they expect things they have already done to stay done, but with kids this is very seldom the case.

Parenting can be quite lonely, especially for Dads that are taking care of a small child. There is interaction such as cleaning and feeding and a little playtime, but not much else. During sleep times, Dad may feel lonely and lost especially if coming from a pressured environment at work before becoming a stay-athome Dad. Being accepted in to a social group with other stay at home parents can go a long way to reducing the feeling of social isolation. While there may still be a stigma and stay-athome dads may have to work a bit harder to get into a suitable social group, it is worth persevering. If worst comes to worst, track down some other stay-at-home dads in the area and start your group.

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REAL RELATIONSHI written by: Caroline Meyer

IP GOALS

Forget the memes and the social media phenomenon of what relationship goals should be. The saccharine sweet and over the top ideas of what a relationship should be will lead to nothing but disappointment as they are generally unrealistic. Real relationships are somewhat different to what is on social media and while most of the online posts are hypothetical, there are some real relationship goals worth striving for. Goals should be inspirational and attainable and do not have to be the same as what your friends want in their relationships. Focus on the facts, see what you can commit to working towards and build your goals based on your own path to happiness in a healthy relationship.

Being Individuals While it is wonderful being one half of a couple, it is important that both people in the relationship do not lose sight of who they are as individuals. Don’t lose your individual identity. Many people give up on their hobbies and interests and even personal friendships. You need to set a goal of being two people in one relationship and support each other in separate pursuits as well.

For Better Or Worse A relationship can go through ups and downs, and it is seldom a case of happily ever after. You have to accept that this is normal and persevere through the bad times to enjoy the good. When you are able to handle the bad times and not just enjoy the good times, your relationship becomes stronger.

Never Stop Growing Improve yourself as a person and encourage your partner to do the same. Support each other in your goals and challenge each other positively. Learning and improving your knowledge is a good way to improve yourself and expand your mind.

Supporting each other in endeavours is a good way to bond while you grow.

Respect the Date Night Ritual A growing family can take up a lot of time. It is important to take time out to be together as a couple. Date night allows you 90

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to give each other one on one attention where you can discuss your relationship as opposed to the daily ups and downs of family life. Make an effort to make time for each other.

Take Care Of Each Other Part of being in a good relationship means considering the other person and their needs. Their interests need to be in the forefront of your mind when making decisions. Respect the other person and consider their emotions and vulnerabilities.

Your partner should always be high on your list of priorities and you need to treat each other in a way that shows how much you value the other person.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Show your partner how much you care. Don’t take your partner for granted. It can be small things or the occasional grand gesture, but doing something for the other person now and then is important. It shows that you thought about the other person and put your mind to actively doing something for them.

Be Real You should never need to hide who you are or put on airs and graces in front of your partner. You should both know the real person. Be honest and open with each other in all situations. This is the person who will see you naked emotionally and physically.

You need to be comfortable with each other from when you open your eyes to a sleepy-headed, clear faced person to the fully made up, smartly dressed and put together person after an hour or two of primping.

Trust Is Important No relationship works without trust. Avoid snooping on each other’s phones and social media. If there is a lack of trust and suspicion that the other person is not completely honest, the relationship is on rocky ground. You both need to feed secure in the relationship and know you can rely on your partner. Neither of you should need to feel threatened by other people in your partner’s life.

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Never Lose The Romance Yes, no relationship stays the same and the fire and passion of a new relationship will calm down to something comfortable and familiar over time. That doesn’t mean that the romance needs to die all together. Simple things such as holding hands while watching a movie together, the occasional breakfast in bed, take a walk on the beach together or give each other a massage. A note in a lunchbox or a single rose delivered to work, sweet gestures that show you love each other goes a long way to keeping a relationship strong.

Discover Together Create adventures, make memories together. You don’t have to go all out such as skiing the Alps or drinking champagne in Paris, your adventures will be based on what you can afford and what interests both of you as a couple. Travel together or simply go for a hike locally. Explore the world or your own backyard. Go to a music concert or a local karaoke bar. Visit a nearby fancy restaurant or simply have a coffee at a new place.

Create your own memories that you can look back on. These memories belong to the two of you and create your own little world together that you can draw on when things get tough.

Money Matters It is important that both partners are involved in the financial matters that concern the home and family. Discuss all the big decisions such as buying a home. For the smaller decisions, you can divide and conquer. Agree who will be doing what and that there is no mis-communications resulting in expenses not being paid or the shopping not being done. Any changes should be discussed openly and honestly so there are no arguments over money.

Laugh & Love Laugh together! Whether it is at a crazy joke or something the other person did, it is important to keep your sense of humour alive. Laughter can help you overcome some of the tough times. Remember to keep your love life alive as well. Flirt with each other and enjoy your physical relationship too. This will change and grow over time as well. Don’t be afraid to talk to 92

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each other so that you both get what you need physically as well as emotionally. Don’t be afraid to set the mood with candles, soft music and fancy lingerie. Switch things up now and then to keep it interesting and fun.

Handle Conflict It is unreasonable to expect that everything will be rainbows and fairy tales in a normal relationship. There will be conflicts. How the two of you handle the conflict will make all the difference.

It is not about winning or losing but rather communicating, compromising and getting past the conflict. Listen to each other and try and keep things calm so you can work through the issue and end up with a stronger relationship.

Look to The Future Set some long-term goals together. This helps you both feel more secure in the relationship as well as give you a sense of accomplishment when you achieve things together. Talk about it, lay out the plans and work together towards a common goal. This helps you imagine a future together and affirms a commitment to staying together.

Be Friends Your partner should also be your best friend. As part of a couple, you should get to know each other better than anyone else. You will be spending much of your time together and you should be able to be open and honest with each other. Have fun together and give each other the benefit of the doubt. Be on the same team and have your partner’s back. Don’t run your partner down and show a high regard to each other in front of others as well. Be the person the other person can come to with any issues they want to discuss or if they simply need love and comfort. Be non-judgemental and be the safe space your partner needs (and they can do the same for you).

Relationships will have ups and downs and having an idea of the perfect partnership in your head may be a recipe for disaster.

Keep it real and honest and you can end up with a relationship that is happy and good for both of you. Forget the Instagram and Facebook posts and focus on what is important in your own relationship. Live the real!

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Vote For

Favourite Baby Forumula

FAILING AND FLAILING AND STILL ROCKING I T!!

WRITTEN BY: SHEREE HODDINETT

I don’t know how I do it some days.

Mothering, parenting, surviving, whatever you want to call it. It escapes me how I manage to keep on going.

Many will say “we just do because we are mothers”. Yep, so true! But isn’t amazing how resilient kids are even when we go off at them?! We feel pretty average after the experience (well sometimes it’s soothing to get it out, especially when you know you’re right!) but a lot of the time kids just seem so forgiving.

I often wonder how they must really feel being yelled at. Although it does seem like it goes in one ear and out the other rather quickly, even when you catch them doing the same thing you just yelled at them for! Even though they drive me up the wall, I will always run in the other direction? Just kidding!

Or am I? Seriously though, they aren’t joking when they say never get between a Mumma bear and her cub, that’s me with my two! When they aren’t being feral, then they’re all yours!

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I’m not a perfect mum, a cool mum, a hip mum or even a nerdy mum.

I never dress up, wear makeup or do much with my hair because I’m not out to impress anyone with my mum skills. Yes I worry about what other people think, especially when I’m yelling at my girls. They probably think I’m a terrible mum and some days I think that too. But I often get a moment of clarity and I know I’m possibly not so bad after all. My daughters have told me they hate or don’t like me very much, usually when they don’t get something they want. They have even said they want to go back to their father’s house and that they never want to leave me in the same sentence.

I’m not going to lie, it hurts to hear but I would bet that 9.5 times out of 10 they don’t really mean it, well I hope so anyway! Emotions are tough to deal with, even as an adult, let alone as a child trying to grasp where they fit into the world. I try not to take a lot of what they say to heart, but it isn’t easy!

Nothing about raising kids ever is!

One of the nicest things to hear is “you’re the best mummy ever, in the whole world”. Awwww sweet isn’t it?! I’m not so sure I am but I’ll take the compliment for as long as it’s being dished out.

I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve gotten angry or yelled or even sworn at my girls, but they still love me. As far as I can tell anyway. It could be because I buy them treats some days, it entices them to keep coming back. Bribery maybe, or just the kind caring mum that I am.

Insert evil laugh right here.

We all have good days and bad days, that’s all part and parcel of being human. Throw in being a mum, or even a parent in general, and nothing ever goes according to plan. I know I’ve still got things relatively easy while my girls are still young and still sort of listen to me. I’ve heard rumours that teenage girls can often be worse than boys and not just in attitude either. Is this where I just curl up into the foetal position and hide? Even though it was many many years

ago, I still have a vague recollection of being a teenage girl. I’m not so sure I’m ready to relive it with not one, but two girls of my own, but I know that freight train is bearing down on me. I’ve already seen it first hand, don’t you worry, I’m so (not at all) prepared! I just have to tell myself I can do it, piece of cake right?!

Even though I joke about it, I have achieved so much more as a mum than I could have ever imagined. Yes there have been so many lows, but they are overtaken by the many highs and massive achievements that have been conquered along the way. I know at times I’m not cut out for this “job” but I give it as good a crack as I can. And so should anyone else who doubts themselves as much as I do, you all know who you are and you are in the greatest company! Keep up with all the self-doubt and good fun over at my own personal blog www. shereekim.com. Until next time….just keep trying!

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girls FASHION 104

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BABY Baby Organic Cotton 3 Piece Set $16.00 Caris 2 Prewalker Ballet Shoes $12.00

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UNDER $60.00 myer.com BABY Sprout Knit Top & Legging Set $34.95 Ciao Belle Butterfly Girls Mary Janes $59.95

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boys FASHION 108

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Tolderol Cable Knit $229

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The Gums Capelet $189

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recipes sourced from: healthier.qld.gov.au MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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Delicious

Brekkie Wrap with Egg and Spinach INSTRUCTIONS 1

Break eggs into a microwave safe container and whisk.

2

Add chives, garlic and stir to combine.

3

Cover and microwave for 2-3 minutes or until eggs are cooked, checking and stirring every 30 seconds.

4

Place spinach leaves in separate bowl and cover with boiling water (wilting). Cover with cling wrap and set aside for 2-3 minutes. Drain.

5

In a small bowl, add avocado, onion and chilli (optional), mix or mash.

6

Lay pita bread on plate and assemble the wrap, laying the spinach down the middle of the pita bread, then the eggs and lastly the avocado mix.

7

Roll into a cylinder, cut in half and serve immediately.

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prep time: 5 mins cook time: 5 mins serves: 1 INGREDIENTS 2 eggs english spinach leaves, 1/2 cup chopped 1/4 avocado 1 tsp fresh chives, chopped clove garlic, finely 1 chopped 1 tbsp red onion, chopped 1 med wholemeal pita bread

Quick & Easy

Bircher Muesli

prep time: 15 mins serves: 4

INSTRUCTIONS

INGREDIENTS granny smith apple, 1 med unpeeled and grated 1 cup rolled oats, uncooked 1/2 cup apple juice reduced fat plain 1/2 cup yoghurt, plus extra to serve 1 tsp cinnamon flaked almonds or 1/4 cup chopped walnuts seed such as sunflower 2 tbsp or pepitas (pumpkin) (optional) chopped seasonal fruit such as banana, 2 cups peaches, berries, passionfruit, rockmelon

1

Mix all ingredients in bowl

2

Cover and refrigerate overnight (or can be consumed after one hour).

3

Serve with seasonal fruit.

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Crab, Corn and Avocado Lettuce Boats prep & cook time: 10 mins serves: 6

INSTRUCTIONS 1

Break the lettuce into individual leaves. Choose 12 intact smaller inner leaves then wash, dry and set aside.

2

In a medium bowl combine corn, avocado, chilli, chives, crab meat, lemon juice and season with pepper; toss gently.

3

Spoon crab mixture into each lettuce leaf and arrange on a platter or serving plate.

4

Garnish with extra chives and chilli, if desired. Serve immediately.

INGREDIENTS 1 cos lettuce 1 can corn kernels, drained just-ripe avocados, 2 stoned, peeled and diced into 1cm cubes long red chilli, deseeded, 1 finely diced (optional) 1/3 cup chopped chives 250g cooked crab meat 2 tbsp lemon juice pinch ground black pepper chopped chives, extra, to serve finely diced red chilli, extra, to serve

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Mexibean Tortilla Melt

prep & cook time: 20 mins serves: 4 INSTRUCTIONS 1

Mix all ingredients except tortillas in a large bowl.

2

Spread 1 cup of bean mix on one side of each tortilla, then fold over the other side to enclose filling.

3

Place in a heated sandwich press and toast for 2 minutes or until crisp and cheese melted.

Cut each tortilla into 3 triangles and serve immediately.

INGREDIENTS can red kidney beans, 1 cup rinsed and drained red capsicum, seeded 1/2 and finely chopped 1 tomato, diced spring onions, trimmed, chopped 2 (including green tops) 1/2 cup chopped coriander grated reduced-fat 1/2 cup cheddar cheese ground cumin or 1/2 tsp coriander 1/2 tsp smoked paprika wholegrain tortillas 4 or soft wraps (20cm)

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Green Risotto INSTRUCTIONS 1

In a large saucepan heat the oil and cook the onion and garlic until tender but not coloured.

2

Add the rice and stir through the onion until the rice ‘crackles’, about 1-2 minutes.

3

Add the wine and half a cup of stock, stirring constantly, adding additional 1 cup measures of the stock after all the liquid is absorbed.

4

Continue until the rice is tender and the stock absorbed, resembling a creamy consistency, not dry or soupy.

5

Remove from heat and stir through parmesan and vegetables.

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prep time: 10 mins cook time: 30 mins serves: 4 INGREDIENTS 1 med onion, chopped 1 clove garlic, chopped 1 tbsp olive oil 1 1/2 cup arborio rice 1/2 cup white wine chicken stock, hot, 6 cups from recipe collection parmesan cheese, 60g grated spears of cooked 6 asparagus, sliced 6 snow peas, sliced spring onion, 1 chopped

Chargrilled Beef with Avocado and Corn Salsa INSTRUCTIONS 1

Preheat oven to 200°C (180°C fan forced).

2

Place capsicum on a non-stick baking tray and roast for 10-15 minutes or until tender.

3

Microwave the corn cob in its husk on high (100%) for 3 minutes. Set aside to cool slightly. Remove the husk and silk. Cut kernels from the cob into a medium sized bowl.

Discard cob.

4

For the salsa, add capsicum, avocado, coriander and lime juice to the corn.

5

Preheat a grill pan or heavy based frying pan over medium heat. Spray the steaks with oil and season with pepper.

Cook steaks to your liking. Rest for 2 minutes. Slice steak into strips.

6

Divide salsa between plates and top with the steak slices.

Serve with lime wedges.

prep time: 10 mins cook time: 25 mins serves: 2 INGREDIENTS red capsicum, seeded and cut 1 med into 2-3 cm pieces 1 lrg corn cob, husk intact avocado, peeled, stoned and 1/2 med chopped 2 tbsp chopped coriander 2 tsp fresh lime juice 2 x 110g rump steak trimmed of fat olive or canola oil spray freshly ground or cracked black pepper 1 lime, cut into wedges, to serve

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Orange Semolina Pudding prep time: 30 mins cook time: 30 mins serves: 4 INSTRUCTIONS 1

Preheat oven to 200ºC (180ºC fan forced).

2

Lightly spray 4 small 1½ -cup capacity ovenproof bowls with oil or one large 1.5L ovenproof dish.

3

In a small saucepan, combine semolina and sugar. Add milk and stir over a medium heat until thickened and smooth.

Remove from heat.

4

Finely grate the orange rind from both oranges. Remove the peel from both oranges and dice flesh, removing any seeds.

Stir orange flesh and finely grated rind into the semolina mixture.

5

In a clean dry bowl, whisk the egg white until stiff but not dry, then fold lightly and evenly into the semolina mixture.

6

Spoon into dishes and bake for 20-25 minutes (individual) 25-30 mins (large dish) until risen and golden brown.

7

Serve pudding straight from the oven.

INGREDIENTS 1/4 cup semolina 2 tbsp sugar 600ml low-fat milk 2 lrg large oranges 1 egg white olive or canola oil spray

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MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

Caramelised Pineapple with Spiced Ricotta prep time: 15 mins cook time: 5 mins serves: 4

INSTRUCTIONS 1

Place ½ cup juice and gelatine into a 1-litre microwave safe jug.

Microwave on high for 1 minute to boil and dissolve gelatine.

2

Mix well while pouring in remaining juice and essence.

3

Divide fruit among four 250ml (1-cup) capacity serving glasses.

4

Pour juice over fruit and carefully stir with a teaspoon to distribute fruit through jelly.

5

Cover each glass with plastic wrap and refrigerate for 4 hours or overnight until set.

INGREDIENTS 1/2 2 tbsp 250g 1/4 cup 1 tbsp 1/4 tbsp

small-medium pineapple (1 can pineapple pieces in natural juice, drained) brown sugar ricotta cheese hazelnuts, ground honey cinnamon

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MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102

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MARCH 2020 | My Child Magazine Issue #102