Rachel Perkins A Girl With Nothing Has Everything in Krabi Sunglasses, wallet, passport, and a half-empty bottle of sunscreen. Those were the contents of my adventure pack as my
Windows User 11/10/14 11:46 AM Comment [1]: I would suggest a more succinct title
Windows User 11/10/14 10:24 AM Deleted: As t…e island was intended to be a day ... [1]
Windows User 11/10/14 11:46 AM
travel companion and I took the ferry to Koh Phi Phi, Thailand. The island was intended to be a day trip, so we had left our 40 lb backpacks carelessly stored in a hostel back on the mainland Phuket. But upon arrival in Koh Phi Phi, our itinerary changed: there would be no ferry back to Phuket this day. Soon it began pouring rain, (it was monsoon season), and in our haste to book one of the few backpacker guestrooms on the island, my companion’s phone was stolen. On a whim we had grabbed our passports that morning, which was lucky since foreigners are required to present passports before checking into all hostels. To take our minds off the rain, the stolen phone, and the empty adventure packs, we booked a few snorkel tours, and explored the island, spending our day beneath the Krabi sun. By late afternoon, the sun began setting and our swimsuits began drying slower and slower. So we bought supplies: generic toothbrushes and a bar of soap. After a month of backpacking Southeast Asia, we no longer brushed our hair or applied makeup, and our Chacos were a fashion statement. But wanting to look pretty for dinner on the island, we picked up some cotton dresses as well. Dinner was
Comment [2]: I changed this phrase a little bit because “pour” might not make sense to a global audience, so I tried to include the word rain.
Windows User 11/10/14 11:46 AM Comment [3]: , (words), is technically redundant punctuation. Choose either the surrounding commas or the parentheses. Parentheses are considered more chatty and separate, whereas commas are considered a pause for additional information.
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:22 PM Comment [4]: Is this something specific? Is that what the guestrooms are called?
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:22 PM Comment [5]: Why mention the phone was stolen? If you’re trying to say “everything’s going ... [2]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:24 PM Deleted: as
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:24 PM Deleted: and…the stolen phone, and the empty ... [3]
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excellent pad thai and panang curry, followed by a fire show and public showing of Leonardo DiCaprio’s “The Beach”. To finish our evening we scouted out an internet café to connect to our lives back home real world, or in my case, to text my parents that I was safe. We stayed 3 more days. “Hey love, any snorkeling today?” “Not today Jerry, see you tonight?” Jerry ran one of the snorkel expeditions on the island. Each afternoon I ate a slice of fresh pineapple pizza and a coconut shake while I read books from the book exchange hut on the beach. He also
Comment [6]: This sentence just said it was ... [4]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:26 PM Deleted: L
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:27 PM Comment [7]: This transition doesn’t work ... [5]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:29 PM Deleted: obviously, we …antinged…to look pretty ... [6]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:30 PM Comment [8]: I know it’s a common phrase, ut ... b [7]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:39 PM Comment [9]: Accept this sentence’s changes if ... [8]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:32 PM Comment [10]: I would rephrase this. Consider: ... [9]
As we watched the sparkling sea foam of Koh Phi Phi slide out of view, I couldn’t help but smile. Koh Phi Phi had
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:39 PM
become my island. My adventure pack was still empty, and it was raining again, but I felt like I had it all.
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:44 PM
Comment [11]: Accept this sentence’s changes ... [11] if Comment [12]: The reason I’m playing around ... [12]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:32 PM Deleted: knew
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:32 PM Deleted: the hottest places to be at night. I don’t ... [10]
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:35 PM Comment [13]: Are you leaving? Where a... re [13] you,
Spencer Campbell 11/10/14 5:35 PM Deleted: seafoam