Freeing boys from the ‘man up’ mentality

Challenging toxic masculinity and changing stereotypes for male pupils is the focus for Maria Williams (pictured, below left) at Ysgol Calon Cymru in Wales. Sally Gillen finds out what makes her a class act.

PE teacher Maria Williams had always been her pupils’ go-to person if they needed support with their wellbeing, but until 18 months ago, it was only girls who sought her help.

That changed when a pupil questionnaire revealed boys felt they would benefit from male-only wellbeing sessions. In 2021, Maria began delivering male-only mental health workshops to year 10 pupils at the school in rural Powys where she has worked for 23 years.

Beforehand, knowing little about the area, she began researching. “I was astounded by how little information was out there,” she says. “There was a plethora of stuff on wellbeing in schools but limited research on male mental health. What I did find was alarmingly high suicide rates. In 2020, four times as many males committed suicide than females. Males make up 49 per cent of the population but account for nearly 80 per cent of suicides.

“I began to think, what if we could break the stigma and get our boys to talk from an early age about how they feel? This may have a positive effect on our pupils now and in the future.”

Get a grip – boys don’t cry

Boys attending the workshops wanted to talk about the pressure to conform to male stereotypes, specifically the expectation to contain their emotions. “Man up”, “big boys don’t cry” and “get a grip” were all toxic phrases they had heard, says Maria.

“I was amazed at how open they were about the stereotyping, but, more importantly, how they felt we needed to change this. Seven volunteers formed part of our male mental health ambassadorial team after the wellbeing sessions, six boys from year 10 and one from year 12,” she adds.

They began meeting every Friday and getting the word out. A display board promoting awareness of the importance of knowing that it is OK not to feel OK was put up. Led by Maria, the team went into key stage 3 form rooms and role-played over several mornings to convey the message that males can talk to someone if needed. A team member designed the logo now recognised by students across the school campus, while another made an R U OK? box for the pupil reception area, where pupils can fill out a form and request support from an ambassador or a staff member.

Now the focus is on raising awareness among pupils of the importance of knowing what to do and who to turn to if they are struggling with their mental health. A range of activities will be held throughout the year and there will be guest speakers on male healthrelated conditions. Maria has arranged a visit from a GP who will talk to boys about diseases such as testicular cancer.

She also hopes to collaborate with an organisation within the farming community, with plans to arrange a visit to school and a discussion on the isolation of farming and the support available within the wider community.

“I feel so passionate about this cause, and I have been privileged to work with young men who share my enthusiasm for promoting positive male mental health within our school,” says Maria.

She has now turned her attention to what can be done beyond her school to promote awareness of male mental health in the wider community, holding an event on 8 March (pictured below) titled Let’s talk about the elephant in the room – breaking down the barriers to male mental health.

“If we just keep looking at the issue from a school point of view only, things will not change,” she says. “I have two teenage sons, so this issue is close to my heart.”

Do you know a class act? Email educate@neu.org.uk