Tampa Bay News & Lifestyles. East Lake Magazine. Vol. 13, Issue 5. May 2020. by Tampa Bay News & Lifestyles Magazine

Vol. 13, Issue 05, May 2020

Your community. Your magazine.™

The Premier “Shop Local” Community Magazine Directly Mailed To 18,000 Homes In Trinity & Surrounding Areas This Independent Community News, Business & Dining Guide Is Directly Mailed Once Each Month To: Anchorage, Bay Arbor, Boot Ranch, Brookers Landing, Crescent Oaks, Cypress Cove, Cypress Lakes Estates, Cypress Run, Cypress Trails, Deer Hollow, Grey Oak, Eagle Cove, Eagle’s Cove at Lake Tarpon, Eagle Ridge, Eagle Trace, Eagle Watch, East Lake Oaks, East Lake

Woodlands, Hunters Wood, Keystone Bluffs, Keystone Palms, Keystone Ranchettes, Lansbrook, Lansbrook Village, Meadow Ridge, Nature’s Watch, Oak Hill Acres, Pine Ridge, Regina Estates, Ridgemoor, Tarpon Woods, Wentworth, Whispering Lakes, Woodfield

Dr. Paula Provides Peace of Mind Counseling from the Safety of Your Home! By Deborah Bostock-Kelley Online Counseling Sessions With the COVID-19 outbreak, anxiety is a normal reaction. For many of us, the coronavirus has made for an uncertain future. Apprehension is a normal reaction to this uncertainty – even for those who rarely feel anxious. If you already experience a lot of anxiety, you may find your’s worsening. It’s ok if you need help managing this. Therapist Dr. Paula Nelson recommends you create a schedule for the day and week to create a sense of normalcy during this unprecedented time.

“Get out of your pj’s, take a shower, enjoy a morning cup of coffee, exercise – do the things you’d typically do to gain a sense of control. We all feel powerless because we don’t know when this is going to end. Creating a schedule gives you a sense of control over your day.” How can you tell that you might benefit from extra help and support? Here are some signs: • You can’t think about anything other than the coronavirus or illness • Your worry interferes with your See “Dr. Paula” on page 18

Dr. Paula Nelson, EdD, LCSW, MCAP, CCTP, Clinical Social Work/ Therapist

Bob the Computer Guy: STAY ONE STEP AHEAD OF THE SCAMMERS!

INSIDE THIS ISSUE:

By Bob Dalles Buckle up my friends. Hang on and get ready for the ride. Trillions of dollars of government relief money is up for grabs. Your phone is likely to get bombarded with phone calls and text messages from scammers promising to help you claim your share of that money. Some might tout that they can help get you your money faster. The IRS says it can take as long as 20 weeks for some people to see their money. Meanwhile the assault on your email’s inbox will continue by criminals drooling at the chance to steal your money. If you have an email address or phone number you can be an easy mark, because just about everyone is expecting to receive some type of financial assistance from the government. And with all of this happening… Many people still take a casual attitude when

From the Editor..............................5

SAT/ACT Improvement...............8-9

Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center........................12-13

See “Computer Guy” on page 16

2 MAY 2020

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4 MAY 2020

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Staying positive through everything that’s been going on in my life was challenging enough before the Coronavirus. Now, it’s a million times harder. I am sure it hasn’t been easy for anyone, much less for those essential workers and healthcare professionals. I would personally like to thank all of you for your courage, dedication, and perseverance during these trying times. With all these tragic things happening, it seems like an unusual time to discuss ways of staying positive. Yet staying positive and remaining calm are critical ingredients in the recipe for successful coping in a crisis. So how can you feel optimistic when all around you is all doom and gloom? Here are some ideas of things you can do to get you into a more positive mindset: 1.) Limit Your “Depressive News” Intake - Seriously, try to limit how many hours you spend listening to all these devastating world news on a given day. Choose a single news source that you trust and restrict yourself to an hour (or two tops) a day. That way, you’ll still be informed of the latest events, without feeling overwhelmed by all the negativity. These days we’re all constantly bombarded with articles and “questionable” news that are not even 100% accurate. Like I said, limit your news sources to only trusted sources. 2.) Take Care of Your Loved Ones & Strengthen Your Connections - You may be young and healthy, but it may not be the case for some of your relatives, friends or even neighbors whose immune systems are compromised. Check with them regularly to make sure they are doing ok. Offer to go grocery shopping for them. 3.) Support Your Favorite Local Business! We frankly don’t know how much longer this social distancing will last. Still, we know that it has negatively

affected many small businesses in the Tampa Bay area, bars, and restaurants in particular. Show your support by buying online gift cards, ordering to-go, and using apps like DoorDash and UberEats. 4.) Take Advantage Of Your Free Time - I cannot begin to express how annoyed I get when I hear people say they are bored. Make use of your new-found time to learn a new skill or practice your favorite hobbies (by respecting social distancing rules, of course). Learn to cook or improve those family recipes. Read a book, read another, read one more. Take care of all those items on your Honeydo list. Clean your closet. Clean your children’s closet. Clean your partner’s closet. Declutter. You’ll feel so much better with less stuff. Best part? You can donate all your gently used items to charity and organizations currently helping thousands of struggling individuals right here in our city. 5.) Be Thankful and Treasure Every Small Moment - Even during quarantine and a global pandemic, you still have many small moments to appreciate and feel thankful for. Cherish that kiss from your spouse, that warm hug from your child. Laugh out loud at that silly yet funny video your friend just sent you. If you’re a pet parent, enjoy your four legged-friends companionship as much as possible. Go on many walks with your dog. Play with your cats. Open that nice bottle of wine and enjoy it, because why wait? Enjoy today, live today, be in the moment. Allow your brain a chance to process these happy little moments, and they will boost your serotonin, the feel-good neurotransmitter that will help elevate your mood and make you feel more relaxed. Stay safe, stay positive! Until next time,

Carla M. Dubis. Tedeschi.

6 MAY 2020

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SAT AND ACT IMPROVEMENT: NEW OUTLOOK AND THE FUTURE By Dr. Wayne Adams Upcoming Test Dates in 2020: SAT on June 6 has been canceled, August 29 still scheduled ACT on June 13 and July 18 still scheduled. Early reports say that students trying to register for the SAT Exam on August 29 are receiving the message that there are no spaces available. NEWS FLASH: While cancellation of the SAT Exam in June was not a surprise, not being able to accommodate students for the August 29 Exam is. And the next SAT Exam after that is scheduled for October 8, which is about five months away. The SAT announcement also said they were working on an on-line exam, implying that large numbers of students would not have to come together in one place to take the exam. This has always been a possibility, and I understand the ACT is also working on this.

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The big problem is how to know the student taking the exam on-line is actually the student they are supposed to be, and not a “ringer”. My students are already shifting to preparing for the ACT if it is given in June or July. Their first exam in fall 2020 is scheduled for September 18 if the exams on June 13 and July 18 do not take place. THE FUTURE: As we all adjust to our new realities resulting from the coronavirus, I have been reading many articles about the possible future impacts on high school, college, and graduate level education. Needless to say, our educational and working worlds have been severely jolted, and probably changed for many years to com. For our high school students, one of the first questions is, “What will their working world be like when they graduate from high school, colleges, and/or graduate schools?” From this projection, we

can work backwards to see how to be best prepared for the future. I highly recommend every family sit down and talk about what the future may hold, and how to best prepare. This can affect selection of colleges, majors, graduate schools, the best way to prepare (such as on-line, in a classroom, independent study assignments), and actual value of different degrees vs the investment. The SAT, ACT, GRE, GMAT,

MLAT, ILAT, medical boards, bar exams (law), real estate licensing, insurance licensing, professional engineer, and other standardized tests will still be with us … and perhaps more important than before. Whatever their flaws, these tests give “decision makers” additional information about an applicant (student, grad student, job applicant, budding professional) as part of determining if they qualify for what they are

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seeking and how they might do in that role. Our on-line SAT and ACT classes are off to a roaring start with multiple students improving rapidly. Here are some comments: “I can’t believe how much we learn so quickly.” “The format is great, enabling me to move ahead with a lot of support and key information when I need it.” “When I saw your first evaluation test, I never believed that later I would get every question right!” “The time goes by so fast.” For our classes, I send my students their Reference Books (2), Reference Binders (2), and Sealed Envelopes (4) via UPS before we begin. We use an excellent, online platform with many options for helping students learn and perform. From my last article, you also know that I have had extensive experience helping students around the country on-line. At present, you can see the scheduled SAT and ACT exam dates at the beginning of this article. I think the ACT in early June is possible, and the ACT in July and the SAT in August will happen. If an exam is canceled

or postponed when one of my students and I are preparing, I will also include one or two additional review classes before the actual exam as part of our prep course package. If You Would Like To Talk More About Your Student … Please contact me at 727-253-0639 or send me an e mail at wwa0811@ mykolab.com. As a personal note, my undergrad and grad school experiences were in a standard, classroom environment. My doctorate was different - I never set foot in a classroom, everything was done by remote assignment, and even before I graduated I had a position as the new Dean of a Graduate School of Business and Full Professor. The school was fully accredited, and recognized as a leader in its field. So I know from experience that on-line and off-site education at all levels can work very well. Dr. Wayne Adams is one of the leading SAT and ACT tutors in the country. His students normally improve 200 – 350 points on the Writing, Reading, Writing and Essay, and Math, and 4 – 7 points

on the ACT composite. They have been admitted to eight of the top ten universities in the country, eighteen of the top twenty-five, and many schools in Florida. These schools include Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Columbia, Stanford, U Chicago, Duke, U Penn, Johns Hopkins, Cornell, Notre Dame, Emory, UC Berkley, UCLA, USC, UNC (Chapel Hill), Wake Forest, NYU, Northeastern (Boston), Boston College, Georgia Tech, Service Academies: Navy - Air Force - and Merchant Marine - Penn State, LSU, Auburn, UF, U Miami, FSU, USF, UCF, Florida Atlantic, Florida Gulf

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Coast, FIU, New College of Florida, Stetson, and Julliard – Manhattan - New England - and Berklee Conservatories of Music. Many have received academic, athletic, or music scholarships. This year, he also tutored three juniors who scored at the national merit finalist/ semi-finalist levels on the most recent PSAT. He is a former Dean of a Graduate School of Business and Full Professor, and began college teaching at the University of Maryland in 1968. He has degrees and advanced studies at Harvard, Yale, Vanderbilt, Columbia International, and Luther Rice.

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10 MAY 2020

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“Who Loves Ya Baby?” – The Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center Story By Tom Bostock The actor of television and movies, Telly Savalas, popularized the saying, “Who loves ya baby.” Although it was used in his role for a popular television series, Kojack, it also aptly describes to the caring and compassionate staff who are dedicated to the health and wellness of your own extended family whether they are our beloved 4-legged animal babies (dogs and cats) or even more exotic species such as ferrets, rabbits, guinea pigs, snakes, lizards(Iguanas, Bearded Dragons, Geckos..) and birds. Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center, a family-owned practice, has been providing outstanding, compassionate veterinary care for your loved ones along with exceptional customer service in a family like type

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environment since first opening in 2010. The quality care that your pet receives at the clinic is comparable to what your own personal trusted family physician provides for you. The clinic is conveniently located in Palm Harbor at 800 Tarpon Woods Blvd., Suite F3, just across the street from Walgreens at Sandy Point and across Chestnut Park and serves pet lovers in both Palm Harbor and the surrounding communities. Dr. Sarah said she chose this location to establish their practice “with the hope of helping a thriving residential community take care of their pets in a family like relaxing environment where our clients and their pets are treated as family.” We’ve talked about what the clinic does, but let’s take a few minutes to learn a little bit about the primary veterinarians

themselves, Drs. Sarah and Pablo. Dr. Sarah’s father was an MD (OBGYN) who practiced in the beautiful island of Puerto Rico. Dr. Sarah always knew that she wanted to be involved in some aspect of medicine and like her father she wanted

to make a difference by helping to relieve pain and suffering through the use of medicine and surgery. After completing her Bachelor of Science degree in Biological Science at the University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez Campus, she decided to enroll

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at The Ohio State University Veterinary College where she earned her doctorate in Veterinary Medicine in 1993 and then after graduation she returned to Puerto Rico where she worked for an specialty exclusive equine practice for a year before coming back to Tampa, where she married her husband Pablo, a former classmate and fellow veterinarian. Dr. Sarah’s special interests are Feline Medicine, Internal Medicine, Surgery and Dermatology. Dr. Pablo also graduated from the Ohio State College of Veterinary Medicine in 1993. He has a special interest in

advanced dentistry, internal medicine, feline medicine and exotic animal medicine and husbandry. Dr. Pablo has taken multiple continuing education courses in advanced dentistry empowering him with the knowledge and skills to treat a variety of oral conditions which in turn greatly enhances the pet’s quality of life by eliminating oral pain and giving the pets a healthy mouth without any bad breath. Current professional memberships include American Veterinary Dental Society, American Association of Feline Practitioners and The Veterinary Emergency and

Critical Care Society. I’m sure that you can agree that prevention is much smarter than suffering from disease and disability; the same thing applies to your pet. The specialized preventive care options offered by the caring staff at Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center will help keep your dog or cat healthy, free of parasites and fleas and help him live a long healthy life by preventing diseases or catching medical conditions as early as possible to greatly improve treatment success. Don’t forget that wellness care is essential to your pet too. In order to provide the best service possible Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center is very well equipped with digital radiography for dental or full body radiographs, in house chemistry machines, IV pumps, EKG (Electrocardiogram) machine, blood pressure machines, anesthetic machine, pulse oximetry to be able measure blood oxygen concentration in the blood. In an emergency, when time is of the essence in diagnosing and treating your pet’s condition, having a clinic equipped with cutting edge technology greatly improves the success of treatment. In order to keep your pet happy, healthy and disease-free Tarpon Woods Veterinary Center offers a variety of services, including: comprehensive physical

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examinations and vaccinations for young to senior dogs and cats, nutrition counseling, preventive dental care, and bloodwork. Dr. Sarah and Dr. Pablo also treat a multiple conditions such as Diabetes, Renal Insufficiency (kidney), Thyroid disorders, Cushing’s, and Heart Disease. They can perform advanced abdominal surgeries such as Cystotomies, Abdominal Exploratories, and mass removals. For pet owner’s convenience, pets can be dropped off early as 8:00am and can be picked up by 5:00 PM weekdays and 12:30 pm on Saturdays. Tarpon Woods also offers HOUSE CALLS to most areas close to the clinic for clients that cannot bring their pets to us. I’m sure that you can find other veterinarians, but you will never find better, more caring, knowledgeable Dr’s and staff than Dr. Sarah and Pablo Schacht, both with over 25 years of veterinary experience. Tarpon Woods Veterinary Medical Center | Veterinary Hospital, 800 Tarpon Woods Boulevard, Suite F3, Palm Harbor, FL 34685 (727 771-0400). They live their mission statement every day: “It is our mission to offer outstanding veterinary care and excellent customer service to your loved ones in a family-like, compassionate atmosphere.”

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“Computer Guy” story continued from page 1 comes to their computer security. They have become so comfortable using the internet that they don’t think about its dangers. It’s like driving a car. Probably the most dangerous thing we do on a regular basis, but we never think about it. Do you say to yourself when you get in your car, “I have a 1 in 114 chance of dying by getting behind the wheel today?” Probably not, but you do, according to the National Safety Council’s website at the time of this writing. After all, it’s our nature to not think of the dangers and consequences of our choices and actions; while we bask in their conveniences. I have been receiving calls from folks who have an increasing concern regarding the security of their computers. As they should, with the growing number of people working from home, attending school, conducting their financial affairs and just plain trying to stay in touch with each other. The safety and security of their computers concern them and they want to know what measures to take to stay one step ahead of the scammers. A simple three-step process can help you head off a world of problems with your computer… First, make sure your digital environment is clean. Your digital environment is the intangible software that instructs your computer to be a web browser, tax software, or solitaire game. You need to begin with a clean software environment in order to create a safe environment. Your computer needs to be thoroughly scanned for any infections; then eradicate those infections. The only way to know for sure if your system is infected is by using multiple methods to deeply analyze the safety of your computer’s environment. Your computer has hundreds of

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thousands of files on it, perhaps even millions. If you are serious about this, I recommend you have a trained professional do this for you. Their experience is invaluable when it comes to the “looking for a needle in a haystack tactics” they develop from doing this for years. Second, once your digital environment is clean, you are ready to maintain your computer’s safety by implementing an anti-malware solution to your computer. There are many options available, both paid and free. Some are better than others. None are perfect. I suggest you implement one and keep it up to date. Unfortunately, many people who take the lead and install anti-malware on their computer, drop the ball by failing to keep it up to date. Third, count to five before you click any link, especially links in unsolicited emails that show up in your inbox. Most phishing scammers hope to tempt you into clicking their link. They play on your emotion and hope you will act without a second thought. I’m telling you to consciously give it a second thought by counting to five before you click. You’ll

be glad you did. That’s it! Implement these three simple steps today and you will significantly reduce your susceptibility to being yet another internet crime statistic. If you need help call me. I have programs in place to provide the solutions you need. We can scan your computer and clean out the infections. We can do it all remotely without you having to leave your home or office, and without us coming to your location. See not only does your computer stay safe, so do you and my team while we provide this vital service to you. Isn’t that what it’s all about? Each of us looking out for each other. Cyber criminals will exploit the easy victims and unprotected systems. Protecting yourself online is your responsibility. Don’t go it alone. We’re here to help. If you are not sure your system is safe, please have it looked over by a Professionally Certified IT Specialist. Call us now at 727-534-4000. We’ve been helping folks restore their peace of mind, and sanity, with their technology for decades. Be Safer In Your Digital World!

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“Dr. Paula” story continued from page 1 functioning in your daily life – such as having a hard time focusing on work – turning to alcohol to reduce your anxiety • You isolate yourself from others when it’s not necessary • You feel hopeless or angry about the situation • You have a hard time eating or sleeping well • You experience physical symptoms such as headache or stomach ache Dr. Paula has been offering online counseling since the 1990s. Well before the current pandemic and the popularity of online counseling, Dr. Paula realized its benefits when an in-person patient was in a disabling car accident. The patient had PTSD from the accident that left her in a wheelchair. Dr. Paula was able to treat her via online sessions, where she was able to see and hear Dr. Paula as if she was in her actual office. Since that time, Dr. Paula has trained both students of counseling and other counselors on how to do online counseling sessions. All that is required is a laptop and webcam or smartphone to have meetings with her online. The benefits of online counseling are many: • Safety – you can see Dr. Paula from the security and privacy of your own home or even your car • Convenient – you can see Dr. Paula during your lunch hour – no travel time is involved • Removes Barriers – if you are unable to travel – located in a rural area with few services available – disabled – ill – you can still come to counseling • Supplemental services – Dr. Paula’s counseling site also offers you the ability to journal and email • Privacy – Dr. Paula’s counseling site is HIPAA secure – your journal and email, and your session is encrypted. No one can see or break into your session. A cyber footprint doesn’t exist Telephone Counseling Sessions If you don’t have the technology to meet online, Dr. Nelson also offers phone sessions. Dr. Paula notes that a study conducted by the University of

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Cambridge found that some therapies are just as effective over the phone as meeting face-to-face. “Some clients find that they are more willing to take risks and share a bit more over the phone than they do if they are meeting with someone face-to-face,” she said. “In cases where there is a history of childhood trauma and abuse, people often feel ashamed to share these past incidents, and the safety of the phone eases this shame and stigma. People feel freer to share their stories over the phone.” Services Offered Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) Do you ever feel worthless even though you know you are a worthwhile person? Do you feel like you’re not good enough even though you might have awards, promotions, and degrees that prove that you are good enough? Do you feel unsafe? Do you seem to overreact to situations? Do you feel alone and abandoned for no apparent reason? These are the types of questions and concerns Dr. Paula Nelson addresses in her private counseling practice. One of the therapies Dr. Paula utilizes to help her clients to heal old wounds that continue to interfere with their happiness today is Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy. EMDR was initially developed and used to treat Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) but is now also successfully used to treat anxiety, phobias, OCD, grief, addictions, and other types of traumas. Adverse life experiences are referred to as “small t’s.” “Though you may not have been blown up in a minefield or molested, a memory of something that was said or that happened to you becomes locked in the brain. It seems to have a similar effect to that of a traumatic experience.” Dr. Paula shares her own story of being forgotten to be picked up by her mother when she was in kindergarten. Her message to herself became “I am abandoned.” Throughout her life, when a boyfriend or a girlfriend or anyone, for that matter, seemed to be dismissive of her, this old memory was triggered and

caused her to feel emotional pain. After being treated with EMDR, this no longer had that impact on her. “Disturbing events are stored in an isolated memory network. This prevents new learning from taking place. The old material keeps getting triggered over and over again. In another part of your brain is all of the information needed to resolve this. It’s just prevented from linking up to the old stuff. Once we start processing with EMDR, the two networks can link up. New information can come to mind and resolve old problems.” Dr. Paula has over 25 years of experience as a psychotherapist and is certified in EMDR. She is also a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Master Certiﬁed Addiction Professional, Certified Gottman Marriage Counselor, and a Certiﬁed Clinical Trauma Professional. It is this combination of education and experience that enables Dr. Paula to address a variety of problems with EMDR. Why use EMDR? “It is super fast,” says Dr. Paula. “What would normally take a couple of years to accomplish with traditional talk therapy, I can achieve in months. I like seeing my clients make progress. My job isn’t to keep my clients in treatment with me. My job and my joy come from seeing my clients achieve their goals, experience fewer symptoms that interfere with their life, let go of the past, and create new and healthy lives and relationships.” What does an EMDR session look like? Dr. Paula says, “I start by taking your history. We’ll talk about the process of EMDR and what to expect. Together we’ll develop a treatment plan aimed at achieving your particular goals. We’ll identify possible targets for EMDR processing. A target is a distressing memory and includes current situations that cause you to have emotional distress. We’ll also develop stress reduction techniques that you can use during and in-between our sessions. Dr. Paula relates, “We will start by asking you to focus on a target. Then I will ask you to follow my fingers with

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will provide EMDR software access and guidance.

your eyes. After we do that for a while, we will stop and talk about anything that comes up. You won’t be able to hold the picture in focus while eye movements are going on, so there’s no need to try. When we talk, you just need to give me feedback on what is happening. Sometimes things will change, and sometimes they won’t. There are no “supposed to’s” in this process. That’s the beauty of EMDR. Your brain does the work. You can’t do this wrong! We will do repetitions of the eye movements and the checking in. Your emotional pain associated with the target will reduce, and eventually, you will no longer be triggered by current-day situations.” Dr. Paula notes that if a client is unable to use eye movements, tones, or taps can be substituted. She has worked with clients who have seizure disorders by utilizing tones and hand buzzers. All of these techniques induce the bilateral brain stimulation necessary to link up the old and new memory networks and reduce distress. EMDR Online Dr. Paula also offers EMDR online. She has software that allows you to engage in the EMDR processing by watching the dots go across your screen. All you need is your laptop and webcam and an appointment with Dr. Paula. She

Couple’s Counseling There are less than 400 certified Gottman marriage and couple’s counselors in the world! Dr. Paula Nelson is one of those certified counselors. Drs. John and Julie Gottman have spent 40 years researching what makes a relationship work. Because all of the Gottman’s exercises and principles are based on research, they offer concrete support and help for couples who want to build stronger, happier healthier relationships. “They have developed principles and activities that help couples to become best friends again,” notes Dr. Paula. “The Gottmans have quite a number of You Tubes available so you can learn about their philosophy on what makes a relationship work and see if it seems like a fit for you.” Couples who come to Dr. Paula complete the Gottman Relationship Checkup. This is an online questionnaire developed by Dr. John Gottman. The report from the assessment helps Dr. Paula determine the areas where the couples need to focus. “It is like having your lab work done before seeing your doctor. It gives us concrete, statistical results for where we need to focus our work,” says Dr. Paula. She goes on to explain that this type of research-driven counseling is beneﬁcial in the long-run to couples. “This helps couples to really focus on creating the relationship they wish for in a shorter amount of time.” Dr. Paula suggests that couples in lockdown together have an escape from each other, doing something they enjoy doing on their own. “There needs to be a balance of being together and being apart to maintain self-care. If you’re glued to the hip, even in the best of circumstances, you will get on each other’s nerves. It’s so important to maintain self-care.” In this ambiguous situation, the pulse increases, and the oxygen levels drop in the brain, causing the fight or flight response. Many petty arguments are brought on directly by the stress of toomuch togetherness of COVID-19. “The Gottmans recommend when

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couples start having conflicts, they have a time-out ritual. They give each other the time-out sign. The ritual involves getting away from each other for about a half-hour because it takes 30 minutes for your pulse to come back down and your oxygen levels to increase. When you’re oxygen levels decrease is when you go into the attack or retreat mode. During that half-hour, you can’t ruminate on the argument and need to distract yourself.” Whether reading, online shopping, exercise, taking a walk, and getting some air, gaming, coloring, etc., having alone time can help reduce disagreements. After thirty minutes, the couple comes back together, no longer in fight or flight mode. “It’s essential for people to look for what their partner is doing right. The stress of COVID-19 makes us hypervigilant and critical. Express appreciation for what he or she is doing right. It’s really easy to be critical. It’s more challenging to acknowledge what your partner is doing right rather than wrong.” Individual Counseling Dr. Paula also has years of experience helping people who suffer from anxiety and depression. If you prefer talk therapy, Dr. Paula has created a safe, healing environment in which you can tell your story, develop insight into your patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving, do some reality checking, and ﬁnd workable solutions to your problems. Dr. Paula provides a safe and nonjudgmental space for you. If you’re looking for a caring professional to help you or your loved ones through a challenging time, reach out to Dr. Paula. She’ll join you on your journey to create the life that you want. Though Dr. Paula does not take insurance, she will supply you with the necessary receipts to submit to your insurance carrier as an out-ofnetwork counselor. Dr. Paula Nelson’s office is located at 1968 Bayshore Blvd. Suite #109 in Dunedin. For more information or to make a virtual appointment, call 813-951-8889, email paula@drpaulanelson.com or visit www.drpaulanelson.com.

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