YOU'RE JOKIN'

Why was the fraction nervous about marrying the decimal?

Because he would have to convert.

Are monsters good at math?

Not unless you count Dracula.

Why was the math book sad?

Because it had too many problems.

Why does nobody talk to circles?

Because there’s no point.

Why couldn't the pony sing a lullaby?

She was a little horse.

What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon.

Why don’t elephants chew gum?

They do, just not in public.

What did the banana say to the dog?

Bananas can’t talk.

1 2 3 8 7 6 5 4 9 11 10 12

How do you make an octopus laugh? With ten-tickles.

What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer.

How do you fit more pigs on a farm? Build a sty-scraper.

What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk? An udder failure.

Public Notices

Tea Gardens Car Rentals

Daily/Weekly/Monthly 0408 029 735

Karuah Motor Yacht Club is a sports club that is family orientated located on the Karuah River Waterfront. We are a licensed premises open every Friday night from 5:00pm for delicious meals and desserts.

Positions Vacant

Private Hire Car Driver

A position is available with a well established Private Hire Car Transport company.

We are looking for someone living in the Tea Gardens/Hawks Nest area to join our team. Must be willing to obtain a NSW Driver Authority and ABN. Would suit a retiree looking for some casual work.

Please send expressions of interest to combinedlimos@gmail.com or phone 4984 7766.

Position Vacant

Painter/brush hand wanted for local work

For Sale

BOXED board games

Rum rebellion John Sands 1980’s. Top Gear game unopened 1990’s. Scrabble game collectable 1955. All good cond. Best offers

Ph: 4981 7523

BICYCLES 1 x mens

1 x womens $50 each

Ph: 0427 879 025

BUNNYKINS Collection

Royal Doulton Crockery

6 piece Unmarked $65 Ph 0429 410 590

COSMOPOLITAN

For Sale

FRAMED pic of creamy coloured roses, $30 Ph 0429 780 257 F241122

GARDEN tools set Incl hoe, rake, mattock fork, spade, broom & crowbar. $60. 4997 0611

GENERATOR 240 inverter generator brand new never used $500ono 0478 254 191

GE Steam and dry iron from 60’s. Original box, exc cond. $40ono Ph: 4981 7523 f120123

For Sale

LOUNGE 3 piece $50. Other items too 0425 254 612 f271022

MOBILITY Scooter 4 wheel. Good cond. with front basket, rear bag and charger. $1400 Free delivery

Ph: 0418 430 643

MUST sell! Fishing reels, lines and many others. Price - best offers! Ph: 4997 0611

For Sale

TYRES 4 x Golf rims and tires 195-65R15 $50 all 2 FWD tires 24565R17 50% tread $10 all Ph: 4984 3710 or 0407461 454

UNWANTED prize Roomba iRobot vac worth $500, sell $350 0402 797 896

WASHING machine Fisher and Paykel, top loader, 7kg bowl, 3 years old, VGC. $310 ono 4997 0331. Pickup Tea Gardens

0415 419 741 mail@kmyc.net.au Finduson

Facebook

Must be presentable ph Phil 0416 096 738

Travelling port, half price, $85 used once 4982 6443 F110822

ORCHIDS, indoor plants, strawberry plants & statues. 4997 2317 e020223

PIANO, white, good for student. $500 Ph:0466 880 639

WASHING machine Fisher Paykell, limited use, VGC. $250. 4982 9942

War Medals

Top prices paid by local collector. Call Jim 0400 060 215

FREE CLINIC BUS

AGM will be held at Hawks Nest Golf Club at 10am on 14th February 2023

What’s Happening Around You

What: It’s On! Tastes Like Summer Karuah Where: Longworth Park, Karuah When: Friday 3rd February Time: 4pm - 8pm

What: The Marina Market Where: Nelson Bay Foreshore When: Saturday 4th of February Time: 4pm - 8pm

What: It’s On! Tastes Like Summer Fern Bay

Where: Fern Bay Reserve, Fern Bay When: Saturday 4th February Time: 4pm - 8pm

What: Medowie Markets

Where: Bull N Bush Hotel, Ferodale Rd

When: Saturday 11th of February Time: 8am - 12pm

What: Port Stephens Produce Market

Where: Port Stephens Council Admin Building

When: Saturday 18th of February Time: 9am - 1pm

What: Friday’s at Birubi Twilight Markets

Where: Robinson Reserve, Anna Bay When: Friday 24th February Time: 4pm - 8pm

What: Fingal Bay Parkrun

Where: 3 Marine Dr, Fingal Bay When: Every Saturday! Time: 8am

For Sale

2.6HP PARSON outboard 4 stroke. Never used! $750, brand new was $987. 0466 880 639

25 CD compilations

Newcastle Top 40 classics 50s-70s. $90

Ph: 02 4966 5000

4 x 17”x 6” Steel rims, fitted with 255/65x17 Dunlop AT23 tyres. Suit current Nissan Navara $130ea ono. Ph

4WD EQUIPMENT Drag chain $30. 3x 20ltr Fuel Canisters $50. High lift $60. Snatch-um strap $45. incl. 2 bow shackles Mob. 0490 168 582

5 X BEACH rods with 2 large reels $60 the lot Ph: 4997 0611

CURTAINS, 2 sets cross over and 10m continuous curtaining heavy lace. $20 Ph 0429 780 257

DARK timber four draw desk with optional upper hood three shelves also slide out laptop desk shelf. $40. Desk chair. $30 Swivel large adjustable comfortable chair. Good used Ph: 0401 546 848 Sandy, Tanilba Bay

DESK 3 drawers very long 230cm. Excellent for studio or hobby. $60 Ph: 4938 5923

DINING room table extendable + 8 wicker chairs + 4 coffee tables $200 the lot. 0429485169 e160223

DVD movies incl. drama and westerns, mainly last 5-20 years. Incl 1 TV series 10x10 disks $60 Ph: 02 4966 5000

ELECTRIC jigsaw Black & Decker $40. Electric planer Black & Decker $60. Ph: 4997 0611

ELECTRIC treadmill adjusts to incline Foldable. Tracks distances, times and calories. Has emergency stop function. $50 Ph: 4919 8117

GOLFING accessories

Golf balls - around 100? 20 cents each Golf buggy $25 Clubs and drives $2 each. Ph: 4982 2335

GOLF Scooter, 2 speed Lotus Blake, Tycoon AZ36. Can be fully disassembled. $3,700 ono. Ph: 4997 0435

GOOD antique Queen Anne dressing table with mirror $60 Ph 0429 601 039

GUITAR left-handed Redding as new never played with soft case $230 Ph: 4981 9939

GYM Form Ab Booster Plus. Brand new. $30 Ph: 4982 8628 f020223

PRYDE Windsufing mast suits 7 metre sail. Little used. $99 Tea Gardens. Peter 0419 932 992

RAIL Corp Wall telephones and desktop push buttom phone 90’s Nokia Mobile 6300 in box, charger and manual 00’s. Samsung mobile and charger 00’s. 2 x Motorola units, chargers with info 90’s. Cheap best offers 4981 7523

ROYAL Doulton

Bone China 40 Pc 8 setting dinner set Ideal Christmas Gift $95 Ph 0416 229 166 f011222

WELLINGTON boots as new $25. 4997 0611

WINDSURFER and fin 85 litres, Freerace 2.6m long. In a bag. No dings Some accessories available. $80. Peter 0419 932 992. Tea Gardens.

WINDSURFER boom Chinook. Good condition $90. Peter 0419932992 Tea Gardens.

YABBI pump as new $40. 4997 0611

Boats

AS new single bed with base and extra length. Asking $200 0457 674 986

BABIES and Childrens clothes new, worth $1,500. Will sell $200

Ph: 0457 087 178

BOOK Case 4 shelves attractive good cond 190cm H 105cm W. $60

Ph: 4938 5923 f260123

BBQ, 2 burner, VGC hardly used inc gas bottle, on wheels $110 0427 980 079

F260123

ELECTRIC Heaters

1 Electric 700mm x 360mm 2000 watts

1 Oil filled 2400 watts $40 for both. Please ring 0404 724 347

EUROPEAN Single adjust slatted bedframes & 2 latex mattresses VGC $500 each

PH: 49979797

EXERCISE Machine Total gym shaper plus instructions, folds up $100. Nelson Bay area Ph Ron 0478 608 379 Public Notices CLASSIFIEDS 02 4981 8882

Sold

HALL glass table wrought iron legs, 3ft long, 16 inch wide $15. 4982 2335

HOME Office, Solid wood Lockable Computer shelving $60.00 Phone Sam 0437 878 155 f201022

HP photosmart printer $30. Ph 0429 780 257 F241122

KAYAK ‘Glide Explore’ adult single, VGC inc paddle, carry strap, pole slots, net. $300! Ph 0407 414 016 e160223

LADIES E-Bike trike New, assembled, large rear basket. $850 Ph: 0450 531 894 ReS13072

LIKE new 4 wheel mobility scooter, front basket, rear carry bag with charger. Will deliver $2,200. 0418 430 643

MOBILITY Frame with hand rails and legs, toilet seat and new bowl. Fits over existing toilet. As new $60. 4981 7523

SKI boots, size 7 Good condition. $90 Tea Gardens. Peter 0419 932 992

SNOW chains brand new, unused adjustable, suits 16 inch wheels or others $95 Tea Gardens. Peter 0419 932 992

ST Phillips uniforms boys Blazer size 24 $50. Boys summer shirts sizes 18, 20 & 22 $10 each Ph 0415 353 798 f260123

SUNBEAM food saver VAC420 with bags, half price $55. 49826443

Motors

2001 SAAB, 9/3 hatch auto, 275,000klms cruise control, power steer, drives well. $2,490 ono. 0466 880 639

TOYOTA Landcruiser 100 series Petrol 1999 model, white very good body. Rego Oct 2023 CL27KF $14,000 Ph: 0401 138 279

Sold

TABLETOP beige flecked laminate wooden bevelled edges Needs legs, strong and sturdy top. 110x60cm $20 Ph: 4981 7523 f081222

TV 40”, brand new unwanted gift still in box Thomson brand. $200 0412 182 493

TWO x shop riders pull apart mobility wheel chairs. New batteries with chargers. $600 each. 0418 430 643

CARAVAN Imperial 17ft shower/toilet, twin beds Rego July. $28,000 ono Ph 0427 970 848

CLASSIFIEDS

02 4981 8882

Best On The Box

Wednesday Hard Quiz

ABC, 8pm

Curl up on the couch for a master class in witty jibes and sarcasm with Tom Gleeson. After nabbing the coveted Gold Logie for his deadpan humour in this comedic quiz show, and now hosting the local version of the British game show Taskmaster, Gleeson (right)is riding a career high –and this is where it all started.

THURSDAY LAW & ORDER: SVU

TEN, 8.30pm

Monday Heritage Rescue

SBS, 8.30pm

If the idea of renovating makes you shudder you need a bit of Nick Knowles’ enthusiasm in your life. The British actor and presenter has overseen everything, from small home makeovers (DIY SOS) to the colossal refurbishments, on this comprehensive and craftloving series. He describes himself as a “bit of a history nerd” which might give rose-coloured glasses when overseeing the painstaking process of refurbishing a heritage site. In tonight’s final, he follows the £40 million (that’s around $A70 million) restoration of Stowe House in Buckinghamshire.

FRIDAY, February 3

6.00 The Drum. Analysis of the day’s news.

7.00 ABC News. Takes a look at today’s top stories.

7.30 Monty Don’s Adriatic Gardens: Greece. Part 3 of 3.

8.30 Van Der Valk. (Mav, R) Part 1 of 3. Piet Van der Valk investigates the deaths of two innocents with no connection to each other.

10.05 The Larkins. (PG, R) The lives of a working-class family. 10.50 ABC Late News. Coverage of the day’s events.

11.05 The Larkins. (Ms, R) 11.55 Adam Hills: The Last Leg. (R)

12.35 Unforgotten. (Mal, R)

1.25 Rage. (MA15+adhlnsv)

In tonight’s season eight premiere, Gleeson enters the fray with a process engineer who adores The Lion King nanny who knows smallpox; a software engineer who plays Legend of Zelda and a dill-pickle maker who likes antique purses. Tune in to find out who will thwart Gleeson’s own specialist subject to score the Big Brass Mug.

After 24 seasons, we all know dedicated detective Olivia Benson (Mariska Hargitay) is every sex offender’s worst nightmare.

“You know, men like you become so good at lying they even begin to believe the ones they tell themselves,” snarls Benson in tonight’s disturbing instalment titled “Breakwater”. It’s glaringly obvious who the bad guy is, but the problem lies with whether the SVU team can pin this conniving predator for his crimes. The story has some distressing developments, making for hard-to-watch TV, but Carisi’s (Peter Scanavino) surprising and gratifying turn against the predator makes for a welcome thrill.

6.00 Mastermind Australia. (R) 6.30 SBS World News. 7.35 Scotland: A Wild Year. (PG)

Inside Central Station. (PGa, R) 9.25 Lighthouses: Building The Impossible. (PG, R) 10.20 SBS World News Late.

10.50 Gomorrah. (MA15+s, R)

1.25 Das Boot. (Mlnv, R)

3.40 Mastermind Australia. (R)

4.40 Bamay. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

6.00 7News Local.

6.30 7News @ 6:30.

7.00 Better Homes And Gardens. (Return) Charlie Albone, Adam Dovile and Melissa King transform a backyard into a stunning space. Johanna Griggs and Pete Colquhoun visit an amazing home that takes indoor/outdoor living to the next level.

8.30 To Be Advised.

1.30 Home Shopping. (R)

6.00 NBN News.

7.00 A Current Affair.

7.30 For The Love Of Pets. (Premiere, PGm) Narrated by Jai Courtney.

8.30 MOVIE: The Dry. (2020, MA15+alv)

A Federal Agent returns to his hometown in regional Victoria to attend the funeral of a childhood friend. Eric Bana, Matt Nable.

10.45 MOVIE: Six Degrees Of Separation. (1993, Mlns, R)

12.40 Tipping Point. (PG, R)

1.30 TV Shop: Home Shopping. (R)

4.00 Take Two. (R) 4.30 Global Shop. (R) 5.00 TV Shop: Home Shopping. (R)

5.30 Skippy The Bush Kangaroo. (R)

6.30 The Project.

7.30 The Graham Norton Show. (Ma)

8.30 Taskmaster Australia. (PGl, R) Hosted by Tom Gleeson.

9.30 The Graham Norton Show. (Mls, R) Celebrity guests include Tom Holland, Zendaya, Henry Cavill, Gugu Mbatha-Raw and Little Mix.

10.30 Just For Laughs Australia. (Mls, R)

Just For Laughs

(MA15+als, R)

The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (PG)

SATURDAY, February 4

6.00 Rage. (PG) 7.00 Weekend Breakfast. 9.00 Rage. (PG) 10.30 Rage Goes Retro. (PG) 12.00 News. 12.30 The Larkins. (PG, R)

2.05 Midsomer Murders. (PG, R) 3.35 Joanna Lumley’s Unseen Adventures. (PGl, R)

4.30 The Human Revolution. (PG, R)

5.25 Further Back In Time For Dinner. (PG, R)

6.25 Better Date Than Never. (PG, R) Olivia’s first ever date ends with a question mark.

7.00 ABC News.

7.30 Call The Midwife. (Ma) Trixie is assigned to a complicated case.

8.30 Midsomer Murders. (Mv, R) After the body of an unknown man is found in a theatre, DCI Barnaby and DS Winter investigate.

10.05 Unforgotten. (Mal, R) Two of the suspects are interviewed again.

10.50 Miniseries: Come Home. (Malsv, R) Part 1 of 3.

11.50 Rage Goes Retro. (MA15+adlhnsv)

5.00 Rage. (PG)

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.05 Blue Water Safari. (PG) 10.00 Love Your Garden. (R) 11.00 Going Places. (PG, R) 12.00 WorldWatch. 1.00 Surf Life Saving. IronMan and IronWoman Series. Round 5. 3.00 Figure Skating. European C’ships. H’lights. 4.30 Destination Flavour China Bitesize. (R) 4.40 Secret Scotland. (R)

5.30 WWII Battles For Europe. (PGaw, R)

6.30 SBS World News.

7.35 Chris Tarrant’s Extreme Railway Journeys: The Lunatic Express. (PGa, R) Chris Tarrant travels across Kenya.

8.30 Portillo In The Pyrenees: A Quest Of Identity. (PG) Part 1 of 4.

9.30 Britain By Beach. (PG, R) Part 4 of 4.

10.25 Great Escapes With Morgan Freeman. (Ma, R)

11.15 Atlanta. (Ml, R)

4.35 Bamay. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.15 France 24 Feature.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

SUNDAY, February 5

6.00

11.00

Wild Odyssey. (R)

6.00 Antiques Roadshow. (PG)

7.00 ABC News.

7.30 Joanna Lumley’s Unseen Adventures. (PG, R) Part 3 of 3.

8.20 Vera. (PGa, R) DCI Vera Stanhope investigates when the body of a popular local GP is found in the back of a burnt-out car.

9.50 Wreck. (Final, MA15+v, R) Jamie needs to rally his new friends.

10.40 Operation Buffalo. (Malv, R)

11.35 Making Child Prodigies. (R)

1.05 Les Misérables. (Mav, R)

2.05 Victoria. (PG, R)

2.55 Rage. (MA15+adhlnsv)

4.00 Classic Countdown. (Final, PG, R)

5.00 Insiders. (R)

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.10 Blue Water Safari. (PG) 10.05 Love Your Garden. (PGa, R) 11.00 Going Places. (R) 12.00 WorldWatch. 1.00 Surf Life Saving. IronMan and IronWoman Series. Round 6. 3.00 Figure Skating. European C’ships. H’lights. 4.40 Secrets Of The Tower Of London. (PGa, R) 5.30 WWII Battles For Europe. (PGaw, R)

6.30 SBS World News.

7.30 Mysteries From The Grave: Titanic. (PG, R) A look at the sinking of the Titanic

9.00 Stonehenge: The New Revelations. (PG, R) Takes a look at Stonehenge.

10.35 Scotland: In Search Of Sir Walter Scott. (PG, R)

11.35 24 Hours In Emergency. (Ma, R)

1.30 Murder Case. (MA15+l, R)

4.50 Destination Flavour: Japan Bitesize. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.15 France 24 Feature.

5.30 Al Jazeera News.

6.00 Home Shopping.

7.00 Weekend Sunrise.

10.00 The Morning Show. (PG)

12.00 Horse Racing. Eskimo Prince Stakes Day and Lamaro’s Hotel Race Day.

5.00 Seven News At 5.

5.30 Border Security: Australia’s Front Line. (PG, R)

6.00 Seven News.

7.00 Big Bash League Grand Final Pre-Game. Pre-game coverage of the Grand Final.

7.30 Cricket. Big Bash League. Grand Final. From Optus Stadium, Perth.

11.30 MOVIE: Grown Ups 2. (2013, PGlnsv, R) After moving back to his Connecticut home town of Stanton with his family, a man and his friends learn some surprising lessons from their own kids as they struggle to deal with everyday life.

Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock.

2.00 Home Shopping. (R)

6.00 Drive TV. (R)

6.00 Nine News Saturday.

7.00 A Current Affair.

7.30 Space Invaders. (Return, PGa) Experts help people declutter their lives.

8.30 MOVIE: Shooter. (2007, MA15+lv, R)

A sniper tries to prove his innocence after he is framed by rogue elements within the government. Mark Wahlberg, Michael Peña.

11.00 MOVIE: Stronger. (2017, MA15+l)

1.10 Mega Zoo. (PG, R)

2.00 The Incredible Journey Presents. (PGa)

2.30 TV Shop: Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 Global Shop. (R)

5.00 TV Shop: Home Shopping. (R)

5.30 Helping Hands. (PG)

6.00 Bondi Rescue. (PGal, R) Three new lifeguards join the team.

6.30 Jamie Oliver: Together. Jamie Oliver prepares dishes for a picnic.

7.30 NCIS: Los Angeles. (Mv) Rear Admiral Ted Gordon is abducted.

8.30 FBI: International. (Mav) Raines gets the chance to prove his field skills when a Bulgarian concert hall filled with multinational student performers and their families is held hostage by a group of Albanian terrorists.

10.30 NCIS. (Mv, R) Gibbs and Fornell’s crusade comes to a climax.

12.30 Home Shopping. (R)

5.00 Hour Of Power.

6.00 Home Shopping.

7.00 Weekend Sunrise.

10.00 The Morning Show: Weekend. (PG) Highlights from the past week.

12.00 Motor Racing. Bathurst 12 Hour.

5.00 Seven News At 5.

5.30 Sydney Weekender. Chris gets aboard a Carnival Cruise.

6.00 Seven News.

7.00 Australian Idol. (PGl) Hosted by Ricki-Lee and Scott Tweedie.

8.45 Maternal. (Premiere, Mals) Three women face the challenge of balancing motherhood with being doctors in the NHS.

9.45 What The Killer Did Next: Megan Newton. (Return, Mav) Hosted by Philip Glenister.

10.45 Born To Kill? Paul Bernardo And Karla Homolka – The Schoolgirl Killers. (MA15+)

11.45 Autopsy USA. (Mad, R)

1.00 Home Shopping.

5.00 Seven Early News.

5.30 Sunrise.

6.00 NBN News.

7.00 Married At First Sight. (PGls)

8.40 60 Minutes. Current affairs program.

9.40 Nine News Late. A look at the latest news and events.

10.10 The First 48: Officer Down. (Mal)

11.05 Manhunt: The Wests. (MA15+av, R)

12.00 Law & Order: Organized Crime. (Mav, R)

12.50 Explore TV. (R)

1.20 He Said/She Said. (PG)

1.30 TV Shop: Home Shopping. (R)

4.00 Believer’s Voice Of Victory. (PGa)

4.30 Take Two. (R)

6.30 The Sunday Project. Panellists dissect, digest and reconstitute the daily news, events and hottest topics.

7.30 Australian Survivor. Presented by Jonathan LaPaglia.

9.00 NCIS: Hawai’i. (Mv, R) After a Japanese sailor is murdered on American soil, the NCIS team must find the killer.

10.00 FBI. (Mv, R) After a woman is kidnapped, the team looks into trysts on both sides of her seemingly perfect marriage.

11.00 The Sunday Project. (R) A look at the day’s news.

12.00 Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 CBS Mornings.

MONDAY, February 6

6.00 News. 9.00 News. 10.00 Muster Dogs.

Antiques Roadshow. (PG, R) 12.00

Silver Spitfire: The Longest Flight.

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.15 Great British Photography Challenge. (PG) 10.20 Boswell And Johnson’s Scottish Road Trip. 11.10 Great Canal Journeys. (PGs, R) 12.05 WorldWatch.

2.10 Secrets Of The Royal Palaces. (PGa, R) 3.00 Portillo’s Greatest Railway Journeys. (R) 3.55 Who Do You Think You Are? UK. (PGa, R) 5.05 Jeopardy! (R) 5.30 Letters And Numbers. (R)

6.00 7News Local.

6.30 7News @ 6:30.

7.00 Home And Away. (PG)

7.30 Australian Idol. (PG) Hosted by Ricki-Lee and Scott Tweedie.

Ball. (MA15+) A look at the Playboy Mansion parties.

10.15 SBS World News Late.

10.45 Partisan. (Mv)

11.40 Mr Mercedes. (MA15+av, R)

4.45 Bamay. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

TUESDAY, February 7

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.15 World’s Most Secret Homes. (Premiere) 10.10 Boswell & Johnson’s Scottish Road Trip. 11.05 Great Canal Journeys. (R) 12.00 WorldWatch. 2.10 The Queen’s Jewels Heirlooms & Legacy. (PGa, R) 3.05 Portillo’s Greatest Railway Journeys. (PGas, R) 4.00 Who Do You Think You Are? UK. (PGa, R) 5.05 Jeopardy! (PGa, R) 5.30 Letters & Numbers. (R)

11.20 Antidisturbios. (Premiere, Malv)

12.15 Unit One. (MA15+a, R)

1.40 Cacciatore: The Hunter. (MA15+v, R)

3.50 Mastermind Australia. (R)

4.50 Destination Flavour: Japan Bitesize. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

9.15 Starstruck. (Premiere, PG) Ordinary members of the public team up in trios to transform into some of the world’s biggest music icons.

10.30 Australia: Now And Then. (Mal, R) Part 1 of 4.

11.30 Busted In Bangkok. (Madv, R) Follows Thailand’s tourist police.

12.30 Home Shopping. (R)

5.00 Seven Early News.

5.30 Sunrise.

6.30 The Project. A look at the day’s news and events.

7.30 Australian Survivor. Tribes must work quickly and efficiently when facing a mega showdown at the all-important Immunity Challenge.

9.00 FBI: Most Wanted. (Mv) The abductor of a detective is connected to a mass shooter case known as The Summer Camp Massacre.

11.00 The Project. (R) A look at the day’s news and events.

12.00 The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (PG)

1.00 Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 CBS Mornings.

6.00

7.00

7.30 Australian Idol. (PG) Hosted by Ricki-Lee and Scott Tweedie.

9.15 Quantum Leap. (PGalv) Ben leaps to flashy ’70s Las Vegas and into the body of promising young boxer Danny Hill on the eve of a big title fight. In order to succeed, Ben and Addison must help the man win the fight or lose everything.

11.15 Inside Belmarsh Prison. (MA15+v, R) Part 1 of 2.

6.30 The Project.

7.30 Australian Survivor. The Heroes and Villains are presented with a major prize of lasagne and photos from home up for grabs.

9.00 NCIS. (Mv, R) The NCIS team investigates the murder of a navy officer who was killed while driving home a recently released inmate and discovers a link to gang activity. Gibbs helps Palmer deal with a personal trauma.

11.00 The Project. (R) A look at the day’s news and events.

12.00 The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (PG)

1.00 Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 CBS Mornings.

WEDNESDAY, February 8

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.10 World’s Most Secret Homes. 10.05 Billy Connolly: Made In Scotland. (Mal, R) 11.00 The Story Of Spice. (PG) 12.00 WorldWatch. 2.10 Secrets Of The Royal… (PGal, R) 3.00 Portillo’s Greatest Railway Journeys. (PG, R) 3.55 Who Do You Think You Are? UK. (PGa, R) 5.05 Jeopardy! (R) 5.30 Letters And Numbers. (R)

7.35 Wildlife ER: Brought Back From The Brink. (Premiere)

8.35 My Grandparents’ War: Keira Knightley. (PG) Part 2 of 4.

9.30 Bloodlands. The search leads to an abandoned house.

10.35 SBS World News Late.

11.05 Cargo. (MA15+a)

12.00 Thin Blue Line. (MA15+av, R)

4.35 Bamay. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

THURSDAY, February 9

6.00 WorldWatch. 9.05 World’s Most Secret Homes. 10.00 Billy Connolly: Made In Scotland. (Mal, R) 11.00 The Story Of Beer. (PG) 12.00 WorldWatch. 2.00 Secrets Of The Royal… (PG, R) 2.55 The Queen and Her Prime Ministers. (PGa, R) 3.55 Who Do You Think You Are? UK. (PGal, R) 5.05 Jeopardy! (R) 5.30 Letters And Numbers. (R)

6.00 Mastermind Australia. (R)

6.30 SBS World News.

7.35 From Paris To Rome With Bettany Hughes.

8.30 American Presidency With Bill Clinton.

9.20 Miniseries: The Walk-In. (MA15+)

10.15 SBS World News Late.

10.45 L’Opera. (Mdl, R)

11.35 World On Fire. (MA15+av, R)

4.00 Mastermind Australia. (R)

4.30 Bamay. (R)

5.00 NHK World English News Morning.

5.30 ANC Philippines The World Tonight.

6.00 Sunrise. 9.00 The Morning Show. (PG)

6.00 7News Local.

6.30 7News @ 6:30.

7.00 Home And Away. (PGa)

7.30 Code 1: Minute By Minute: The Cronulla Riots. (Malv)

8.30 The Front Bar: All Sports Edition. (Ml) A lighter look at the world of sport.

9.30 Kitchen Nightmares Australia. (MA15+l, R) Hosted by Colin Fassnidge.

10.35 Police Code Zero: Officer Under Attack. (MA15+l, R)

11.35 Autopsy USA. (Mad, R)

12.30 Home Shopping. (R)

5.00 Seven Early News.

5.30

6.30 The Project. A look at the day’s news and events.

7.30 The Dog House Australia. (Return, PG) Narrated by Dr Chris Brown.

8.40 Fire Country. (PGa) A vegetation fire gets tricky for the crew when a panicked horse refuses to leave a burning barn.

9.40 Bull. (PGlv, R) Chunk does his daughter a favour and convinces Bull to represent a teenager on trial for robbery.

11.30 The Project. (R) A look at the day’s news and events.

12.30 The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (PG)

1.30 Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 CBS Mornings.

7.00

8.30 The Best Of The Best And Worst Of Red Faces. (PGal, R) Daryl Somers presents HeyHeyIt’sSaturday’s most popular, funny and weird Red Faces acts.

10.00 Mrs Brown’s Boys. (Mls, R) Everyone is concerned at the news that the poisoner Peggy Piper has been released from prison.

10.45 To Be Advised.

12.00

6.30 The Project.

7.30 Taskmaster Australia. Hosted by Tom Gleeson.

8.30 Law & Order: SVU. (Ma) A lifesaver asks the Special Victims Unit for help when he suspects his boss is preying on his sister. After tragedy strikes, Velasco tries to convince a reluctant witness to testify in court.

10.30 NCIS: Los Angeles. (Mv, R) Rear Admiral Ted Gordon is abducted.

11.30 The Project. (R)

12.30 The Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (PG)

1.30 Home Shopping. (R)

4.30 CBS Mornings.