New York Family August 1, 2012

BEST FAMILY FOOD TRUCKS

19 DAY TRIPS WE LOVE

AUGUST 2012

family New York

august 2012

Established 1986 newyorkfamily.com

Mastering

WIN

A BIRTHDAY PARTY AT JODI’S GYM

the nursery

school admissions maze

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8

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Home Birth CITY in the

must read

The REAL

Secrets of

successful

children new york family

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the

QUEEN &

KING CUPCAKES of

Sweet Talk With Mia & Jason Bauer Of CRUMBS

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editor’s note One Big, Long, Late Afternoon In journalism, the phrase “bury the lead” captures the idea that you’ve underplayed your most important story. I don’t want to do that here, so let me jump right in and recommend Tali

Clockwise from left, Kim Baker (hair and makeup), Eric Messinger (me), Monica Cotto (stylist), and Whitney Casser (deputy editor), en route to meeting this month’s cupcake royalty.

Rosenblatt-Cohen’s interview with Paul Tough, the author of a new book, How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, And The Hidden

transformed it into the retail juggernaut. I have a predisposition

Power Of Character. A distinguished journalist and a New York

to liking anyone who puts cream cheese on or in anything (as

City parent (my two favorite qualities in a person), Tough ex-

they do in their cupcakes), but the Bauers’ smarts and affability

plores some powerful ideas about the nature of success in school

would have won me over anyway—as it will you (page 40).

and in life—and what a parent’s got to do with it. Or at least those

Having grown up a block from the beach, come summer

are the things we focused on in Tali’s wonderful interview (page

I always feel an outsized yearning to get back to my breed-

47), which ranges from the character-building dividends of chess

ing ground—or at least to be close to a large body of water.

to the need to give older kids the room to fail. (Not on my watch!)

And I’m not even that much of a swimmer—I just love the mix

August is typically one of our smallest issues, but it’s also

of sand, water, and sun, especially in the late afternoon. Even

one of my favorites. I love its mix of back-to-school stories

when I’m working, I like to think of the month of August as

with a little heft (like our interview with Tough), alongside

one big, long, late afternoon, and hopefully this issue will add

lighter stories meant to squeeze every last bit of fun out of

some joy and inspiration to yours.

summer, like the delicious stories on food trucks (page 12) and grilling (page 64).

This issue is also sweetened by our cover interview with Mia and Jason Bauer, who one day opened a mom-and-pop cupcake shop on the Upper West Side called CRUMBS, and then

REGISTER NOW

Happy August, Eric Messinger Editor, New York Family emessinger@manhattanmedia.com

Preschool

A Licensed Preschool Education from Gymtime Rhythm and Glues. At Early Learning Foundations our philosophy is based on the belief that children are competent, self-driven learners who benefit most through exploration and their interactions with each other.

FOR FALL 2012!

■ A FULL PRESCHOOL CURRICULUM ■ DEVELOPMENTALLY APPROPRIATE CLASSROOMS ■ 5 CONSECUTIVE DAYS AGES 3-5 YEARS ■ NYS LISCENED EARLY CHILDHOOD EDUCATORS ■ DYNAMIC CURRICULUM AND CLASSROOMS

1520 York Avenue, New York, NY 10028 • 212.861.7732

For more information and a full list of classes for your child visit: www.gymtime.net.

@GymtimeNYC

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NEW YORK FAMILY

contests & special events Win A Birthday Bash At Jodi’s Gym Jodi’s Gym has been celebrating birthdays with NYC families for over thirty years—that’s over 10,000 happy birthday parties— and your child has a chance to win his or her next amazing birthday bash at Jodi’s! Kids and their parents will burst with joy during an action-packed, fun-filled hour and a half during which little ones swing, balance, jump, climb, tumble, and stretch to their hearts delight—all under the expert supervision of trained and certified instructors. The brightly colored, safe, fun, spacious, and newly renovated facility is a parent and child’s dream come true. When it’s time for treats, just sit back, relax, and enjoy while the Jodi’s Gym team takes care of everything. A party at Jodi’s Gym is always a guaranteed success.

For details on how to enter to win a birthday bash at Jodi’s Gym, visit newyorkfamily.com and click on the Contests & Giveaways tab. Good luck!

The New York Baby Show Was A Smash Success!

Sign Up For Our baby Newsletter!

New & Expectant Parents can sign up for our free baby newsletter at newyorkfamily.com

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We welcomed over 3,000 families to the New York Baby Show this past May! In case you missed it, here are some highlights from the 2012 show: • Dr. Harvey Karp was our keynote speaker. He is America’s #1 Pediatrician, and Creator of The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block DVDs and books.

• Ali Landry, celebrity mom and Spokesmoms.com Founder, gave moms the scoop on kids’ products & exciting mommy experiences.

• Over 100 top brands for new and expectant parents were there, including Destination Maternity, Skip Hop, Joovy, Quinny, Maxi-Cosi, Orbit Baby, Plum Organics, and many more.

• The Stroller Test Track was a great way for attendees to try out the newest strollers on the market.

• Britax entertained parents with a series of competitions and giveaways to promote the “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” movie.

• The amazing folks at Stroller Spa gave free stroller tune-ups.

• Dr. Alan Greene, author of From First Kicks to First Steps, and Today Show producers Mary Ann Zoellner and Alicia Ybarbo, authors of Today’s Moms: Essentials for Surviving Baby’s First Year, hosted discussions on important topics for new parents.

• We hosted an Ultimate Nursery Giveaway! One lucky winner won a complete nursery with a top-of-the-line crib, mattress & bedding, furniture, glider, layette, stroller, car seat and more.

Our next Baby Show will take place the weekend of May 18-19, 2013 in NYC. See you at the show! www.newyorkbabyshow.com www.newyorkfamily.com

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photo by asterix611

family fun guide

FlyNY Kite Festival

Great Events for August

August 4, 11, & 18

SPORTS IN THE STREETS [All Ages] On three Saturdays this month, Park Avenue will be closed to cars for nearly seven miles as Summer Streets returns for its fifth year. New Yorkers can enjoy the rare chance to glide along a 160-foot-long zip line, munch on healthy treats at the Whole Foods Market City Picnic, or scale the 25-foot climbing wall to view the massive festival from above. Don’t miss the free football games, dance and yoga classes, and other exercise- and sports-themed activities for all ages.

Free, 7am-1pm. Park Avenue between Central Park and the Brooklyn Bridge, nyc.gov/summerstreets.

Summer Streets

B y S a r ah G r eene without leaving the city. Celebrate the Hong Kong Dragon Boat Festival— traditionally held on the fifth day of the lunar calendar’s fifth moon, which fell on June 23 this year—by watching more than 170 teams compete in one of America’s largest dragon boat races.

Boogie to live international music and root for your favorite crew as bands of colorful vessels tear across the water in time with booming Chinese drums. Feast on yummy ethnic cuisine, participate in martial arts demonstrations, or create themed arts and crafts projects. Free, 9am-5pm.

Meadows Lake, Flushing Meadows Corona Park, Queens, 718-767-1776, hkdbf-ny.org.

August 11 & 12 August 4 & 5 RIVER RACING [All Ages] Bask in the festivities of Asia

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HISTORY IN THE MAKING [All Ages] You don’t need a time machine to travel back to the 19th century—simply

venture on to Governors Island for Civil War Weekend where you can commemorate the 1860s with Union soldiers and Confederate prisoners themselves. Bonding with reenactors aside, kids can foster a love for history by designing fortresses, learning drill instruction, and witnessing live cannon and small arms demonstrations. Extras like a Civil War-style medical exam and the Civil War musical performances will be one for the history books! Free, 10:30am-5pm. Governors Island, Fort Jay and Castle Williams (10 South St. #4), 212-825-3045, nps.gov/gois.

August 16 AL FRESCO THEATER [All Ages] What better way to enjoy a classic summer picnic than with a side of classic theater entertainment? From 12:30pm-1:30pm, Broadway in Bryant Park presents the stars of Broadway

photos by Kevin Kenny, Teh Moneda, asterix611

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Civil War Weekend

www.newyorkfamily.com

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10 Great Events and Off-Broadway’s hottest musicals as they heat up the lunchtime stage on everyone’s favorite midtown lawn.

Little ones will love numbers from “A Christmas Story” and “Bring It On: The Musical,” while older kids can get a dose of culture with favorites from “Avenue Q” and “Rock of Ages.” Free, 12:30pm-1:30pm. Bryant Park Lawn, Sixth Avenue and West 42nd Street, 212-768-4242, bryantpark.org.

August 18 ALL ABOUT HARLEM [All Ages] Join over 60,000 attendees in sampling exotic cuisine, crafts, clothing, and more from an assortment of vendors and exhibitors along West 135th Street. This year’s Summer in the City, a part of the Harlem Week heritage and art festival, celebrates Jamaica’s 50th anniversary of independence with a special tribute to Bob Marley: an outdoor film festival, rock and hip hop concert with regional dance acts, and college step dance competitions. Free, 12pm-6pm. West 135th Street between Malcolm X Boulevard and St. Nicholas Avenue, 212-862-8477, harlemweek.com

August 18

events

LET’S GO FLY A KITE! [All Ages] Tear up the summer sky at the FlyNY Kite Festival in Riverside Park!

From 11am-3pm, you can participate in kite-making workshops and learn how to fly a kite like a pro, watching your masterpiece take flight in the breeze. On the pier, dance underneath your swaying kites to live music and entertainment, or sit back and enjoy some demonstrations by the Kiteflyers Association. This event will send both kites and spirits soaring.

August 25 TENNIS FOR TOTS [All Ages] Get ready to serve your meanest slices across the same nets as your fave tennis stars on Arthur Ashe Kids’ Day. Little ones will be able to sharpen their tennis skills with personal trainers, race fellow tennis lovers in an obstacle course, and watch professional players duke it out on the courts. Don’t forget to try out racquets weighted to players’ specifications and check how fast your serve is with real IBM radar guns before you catch the Stadium Show, which has featured hot musical acts like Justin Bieber and Rihanna in previous years.

Ticket prices vary, 9:30am. USTA Billie Jean King National Tennis Center in Flushing Meadows Corona Park, Queens, arthurashekidsday.com.

Through August 30 WATERFRONT ARTS [Ages 1-15] On Wednesdays and Thursdays this month, head over to CMA’s free pop-up art program on the West Side’s breezy pier and get creative. Each day, start with your very own mixed media project, followed by a teamplayer contribution to the program’s collaborative masterpiece. Remember to make a weekend stop on the 18th for the special Science on the River workshops, where you can sculpt clay puppets and try your hand at stop motion animation, take part in an eco-art installation, and more. Free, 3-6pm Wednesdays and Thursdays. Hudson River Pier 25, 212274-0986, cmany.org.

For more event picks for families, check out our Family Calendar at newyorkfamily.com/events

www.newyorkfamily.com

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Free, 11am-3pm. Pier I at 70th Street, Riverside Park South, nycgovparks.org.

Bronx Zoo Harlem Week

Through September 2 POTTERMANIA FOREVER [All Ages] If you haven’t yet joined throngs of NYC Muggles in catching the Olivier Award-nominated “Potted Potter—The Unauthorized Harry Experience,” now’s your last chance. The hilarious spoof, which was slated to close mid-August, has been extended for a few more weeks. Join comedians Dan and Jeff as they squeeze your favorite spells, foes, horcruxes, and other Hogwarts highlights from all seven books into a 70-minute performance. Show-goers can even participate in a live game of Quidditch without having to find the elusive platform 9. Ticket prices and show times vary. Little Shubert Theatre, 422 West 42nd St., 212-2396200, pottedpotter.com.

Through September 3 LEGO SAFARI [All Ages] Calling all mini adventurists: Giant LEGO sculptures of tigers, gorillas, and other exotic wildlife are back again at the Bronx Zoo’s Wild Forest! After a thrilling journey through the safari, head over to the LEGO Construction Zone to create your own building-block animals and help complete the zoo’s mural.

To wrap up the perfect expedition, catch an animal-themed handmade puppet show or a performance of the beloved “Avenue Zoo,” featuring OffBroadway’s Kate Monster. Free with admission, 10am-5pm on weekdays and 10am-5:30pm on weekends. 2300 South Boulevard, Bronx, 718-367-1010, bronxzoo.org.

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BROADWAYDANCECENTER’s

Children & Teen Program 2012-13 Season of Dance Returning students registration: July 2nd New students registration: July 9th Classes begin: September 22nd

Inspiring the World to Dance

Our 32-week Children & Teen Program runs from September through June and holds classes in Creative Movement, Pre Dance, Ballet, Tap, Jazz, Hip-Hop, Triple Threat, Latin Jazz, Modern, African, Contemporary, Jumps & Turns, and Lyrical.

Classes are held on Tuesday, Thursdays, Saturdays, and Sundays for students ages 3-18, in levels from beginner to advanced.

BROADWAYDANCECENTER.COM/ctp

322 W 45 St, 3rd Fl • NY, NY 10036 • 212-582-9304 • ctp@bwydance.com

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with dinges (toppings) like Nutella, strawberries, and the infamous spekuloos cookie butter. For a savory twist, try the pulled pork topped with creamy coleslaw and sweet BBQ sauce. wafelsanddinges.com

Eastern Edibles: 5. KORILLA BBQ By packaging traditional Korean flavors into the beloved taco and burrito forms, Korilla entices even the least adventurous eaters while still satisfying die-hard Korean BBQ fans. Kids will love the cheesy Porkinator, with pulled pork, bacon fried rice, kimchi slaw, and Korean BBQ sauce.

Tofu substitutions available. korillabbq.com

Health Food Haven: 6. THE CINNAMON SNAIL Perfect for the health-conscious family, The Cinnamon Snail offers a seasonal vegan menu that introduces meat alternatives that don’t sacrifice flavor. Start your kids’ days off right with the Standard American Riot: blue corn pancakes, maple syrup, scrambled tofu, tempeh, and greens. cinnamonsnail.com

Personal Pie Palace: 7. EDDIE’S PIZZA Calling all crust skippers: Toppings take center stage on this mobile oven’s super-thin pies. Select from regular or whole wheat crust, then pile on your favorite fixings or try pre-set flavor combos like the classic Margarita. Each personal pie comes in 8 pieces, so the family can mix and match. eddiespizzany.com

Burger Boss: 8. FRITES ‘N’ MEATS This food truck brings the bistro experience to the streets, combining New York’s finest cheese, meat, and bread to make the fancy pants burger accessible for the youngest of patrons. Try a wagyu burger with cheddar cheese and applewood smoked bacon on a brioche bun—and don’t forget the double-fried Belgian fries! fritesnmeats.com

e r lo p s Ex T h i

Why Stop At Just One?

Masters Of Morocco: 9. BISTRO TRUCK For a street-side taste of Morocco right in NYC, Bistro Truck offers everything from braised lamb over couscous to burgers on fresh baguette. The chicken pastille is a unique but safe bet for expanding horizons: eggs and almond baked in layers of flakey filo and seasoned with a variety of Moroccan herbs and spices. bistrotruck.com

Plantain Paradise: 10. PATACON PISAO Serving up authentic Venezuelan cuisine, this restaurant on wheels specializes in the patacón, also known as the green plantain—the fruit that looks like a banana but tastes like a potato. For an extra rich treat, try the carne mechada, succulent shredded beef served with ketchup, fried cheese, and special sauce. pataconpisaonyc.com

Corny Comestibles: 11. SOLBER PUPUSAS Take your kids on a trip to El Salvador at Solber Pupusas, which serves up the traditional El Salvadorian street food of grilled and stuffed corn flour patties. Fill a kid-friendly, pizza-style pupusa with cheese and pepperoni—and maybe even sneak in some spinach or zucchini. solberpupusas.com

Mexican Munchies: 12. MEXICUE Nothing spells summer cookout like the words “Mexican” and “barbecue.” Mexicue is the best of both worlds, blending Mexico’s spices with picnic favorites like ribs and brisket.

Fledgling grillers will love the sweet flavors the smoked short rib taco, featuring sweet Memphis mole, pickled onions, and cotija cheese. mexicue.com

Grecian Grub: 13. SOUVLAKI GR Introduce your kids to the flavors of Greece with souvlaki, dubbed the hamburger of the country. Your kids will forget the bun and patty once they bite into the warm pita, charcoal-grilled meat, and creamy tzatziki.

For a snack, replace ketchup with salty feta on fries. souvlakigr.com

Every third Sunday in the summer, Prospect Park Alliance teams up with the NYC Food Truck Association to host a Food Truck Rally. Sixteen participating food trucks make their way to Grand Amy Plaza, serving up signature dishes to hungry crowds from 11am to 5pm. prospectpark.org/calendar/ event/food-truck-rally Hoping to stay in the city? Enjoy the offerings of the Gourmet Food Truck Bazaar alongside great shopping at the Hell’s Kitchen Flea Market every second Sunday through October. The event has already brought the likes of Coolhaus and Milk Truck together—check the website for updates. hellskitchenfleamarket.com/home Don’t worry if you can’t hit up the next rally or bazaar. Four or five food trucks line up every weekday from 11am to 3pm at Food Truck Court in the center of Battery Park City. The outdoor seating area makes for a perfect al fresco lunch experience in balmy weather. worldfinancialcenter.com/foodtrucks

LOOKING FOR MORE FAMILY-FRIENDLY EATS? CHECK OUT “DINING WITH THE MINIS” AT NEWYORKFAMILY.COM.

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Taiwanese Temptations: 14. BIAN DANG This food truck brings a whole new meaning to lunchbox meals with its Taiwanese bentos. Chose from cult favorites like fried pork chop over rice and steamed pork buns. For young Asian food fans, the doughy dumplings are foolproof—and four per order means there’s plenty to share. biandangnyc.com

Empanada Empire: 15. NUCHAS Gourmet goes hand-held at Nuchas, which explores the many renditions of the empanada. Homemade doughs enclose multicultural fillings, from Argentine beef to Indian curry. Sweet tooths will love the desert empanada, featuring granny smith apples, tart cranberries, juicy pears, and gooey Nutella. nuchas.com

www.newyorkfamily.com

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a good idea

School’s

Jewels With The Help Of Jeweler Hobbs & Kent, Local Schools Have Found Fundraising Success In Selling Beautiful Bits Of Institutional Pride

By Eric Messinger

Parent fundraising has become such an important part of school life in the city that when an original, exciting, and cost-effective idea comes along, it’s not surprising that PTAs and development offices immediately pay attention.

A few years ago, New York City dad and world-renowned jeweler Anthony Hopenhajm had one of those golden ideas—more literally, it was sterling silver—though at first even he didn’t realize how good it was.

Hopenhajm had been approached by the PTA at his daughter’s school, the all-girls Nightingale-Bamford, to come up with “something nice” that Nightingale parents could buy for their daughters. Hopenhajm already had a busy day job running two very successful and prestigious jewelry lines, Seaman Schepps and Trianon, but he wanted to give back to the school.

The idea he came up with was a sterling silver medallion featuring the school logo—something girls might keep on a charm bracelet. A few years and a few bulk re-orders later, the light bulb went off and a new jewelry line—and a wonderful school fundraising tool—was born.

“The appeal for kids, especially those who are graduating, is that it’s just really nice to have this kind of memento of your school,” says Hopenhajm.

“It’s personal, it’s special, it resonates with you—it’s something that you’ll always want to have.”

The new line, called Hobbs & Kent, was established about five years ago with a focus on products that are sterling silver, which is key for parents because it ends up being a lot more affordable than if gold were involved.

On the school front, the Hobbs & Kent product line now includes

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www.newyorkfamily.com

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Andrew Schwartz

a special place

A Gym of Their

Own

By Combining Next-Generation Facilities With The Fun Of A Playground, My Gym UWS Introduces Little Kids To The Joy Of Exercising

By Elisabeth Frankel Reed

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After a cheerful welcome and some warm-up exercises around a red mat, a group of excited toddlers dash off in different directions to choose their next activities. Several race for the nearby ball pit, some climb up the slide, and one gracefully walks across the balance beam. Others scatter further to the host of colorful equipment spread around the spacious facility.

No doubt, the energy and play options at My Gym UWS, a locally owned franchise of a global children’s fitness center, are fabulous. But the heart of the venue lies in its dedicated teachers who engage with the children, whether it’s by transforming a little car and some ramps into a thrilling roller coaster ride or by simply sitting on the floor and playing with them.

“We just love kids. We love playing with kids, we love watching them grow and helping them grow,” enthuses Katie Johnston, a teacher and Program Director at the Upper West Side location. Johnston had originally joined the My Gym team in Encino, California, for a fun day job while she pursued an acting career. Little did she know that she’d find herself enjoying her work so much that it would become her new focus when she moved back home to New York.

My Gym UWS owner Brian Davis took a very different route to the helm of the franchise. Though he once entertained the idea of working with My Gym as an entrepreneur and business school grad nearly a decade ago, he moved on to work as a consultant for McKinsey and at several financial firms instead. Fast forward to last year: Davis wanted to go back to entrepreneurship, and, serendipitously, My Gym was looking for a new owner of the Upper West Side location. With two-year-old Brooke at home then—plus three-month-old Riley now—being able to set his own office hours has been a big plus for Davis.

And that’s not to mention how much Brooke, now 3.5, loves to attend classes and play in the gym. “When she says ‘My Gym,’ she means it literally,” he laughs.

For Davis, the key to a truly fun and safe venue like My Gym UWS is creating a non-competitive environment where children can learn about their bodies as well as how to use them and keep them healthy. “We’re not teaching kids to be great sportsmen; we’re teaching them to be good athletes,” says Davis. Programs concentrate on fundamentals—body control and awareness, agility, flexibility, balance, and cognitive and social skills—that prepare kids to succeed at any sport or activity.

Parents may be surprised to see that some of the crucial skills taught in My Gym UWS classes are not physical ones. Because socialization is critical to a child’s growth, it’s also heavily emphasized in the curriculum. This is where belonging to a parent corporation really comes with its benefits—the national organization stays up to date on developmental research and helps create age-appropirate programs accordingly. www.newyorkfamily.com

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At-Home Parent & Child Exercises For Rainy Days Forward Rolls (Motion, Agility, Tucking Chins) For 6-18 months: For children this young, parents do all of the work. It’s easier to be on your knees, especially on a soft surface like a mattress.

Hold your baby scooped around his waist with your stronger arm. (If you are right handed, hold your child with my right arm, on my right side.) Hold him like a football on your side, with his head facing forward.

Lean your baby toward the ground. Your child should automatically reach his hands to the floor. Use your other hand (left hand) to tuck and support the back of your baby’s head.

Roll him slowly forward, then help him sit back up.

Log Rolls (Tummy Muscle Strength, Stimulation, Body Awareness) For 14 months to -2.5 years: Lay your children on the ground with their bodies as straight as possible. Lift their arms up by their ears.

Slowly roll them onto their tummies, making sure their arms stay up. Continue to roll 2-3 times.

Tip: If the children won’t keep their arms raised, tuck their arms down instead.

Lap Walkover (Upside Motion, Agility, Environment Awareness) For 6 months-3.5 years: Sit with your legs out straight and place your baby on his back across your lap. Your child’s head needs to be on the same side as your dominant (strong) arm.

Place your dominant arm right across your child’s tummy and grab his hips with both hands.

Lift your child by the waist and rotate him over your arm—like backward roll over your lap.

Tip: Your child’s head and hands should stay in contact with the floor, but don’t allow pressure to be put on the neck.

Find more age-appropriate modifications for all three exercises at newyorkfamily.com.

Case in point: Children are most comfortable when they know what to expect, so every My Gym UWS class is organized around a standard sequence of events. Gymster participants, for example, always enjoy a special gymnastics activity at the same time during each class—like a Special Stairs session where they work on gross motor skills— though activities vary week by week. And while adults can concentrate for long periods, children have shorter attention spans, so some classes like yoga feature varied activities to re-engage young students constantly. “We’re focused more on how children learn, versus taking an adult class and bringing it down to a younger age,” says Davis.

The beauty of the individual franchise is that local ownership adds a more personal touch to the scientifically sound enterprise. “Being a franchise company delivers certain resources that we could never develop on our own, but we deliver that in a very community-type place,” says Davis—a nod to how teachers form a strong connection with students and their families (hugs and high-fives are common exchanges in and out of the facility).

All of My Gym UWS’s special programs contribute www.newyorkfamily.com

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to forging this tightly knit community. The venue hosts unique birthday celebrations—with games, puppet shows, and music—to make each kid the center of attention on his or her special day. And just like Davis’ daughter, all My Gym UWS students can see the gym as their personal playground; they’re welcome to unlimited use of the facilities during any of the Free Play sessions.

And parents are just as important. Working moms and dads can experience what the kids have been practicing in class at evening Free Play sessions—or enjoy a well-deserved break thanks to My Gym UWS’s popular Parents’ Night Out program. “Parents need down time and they don’t want to feel guilty about it,” Davis says, and there’s no need to feel bad when you know your kids are enjoying enriching puppet shows and circle time. Even for regular classes, instructors have skill sheets that show parents what the classes are covering, plus activities to practice at home.

In the same family-friendly spirit, My Gym UWS is as sensitive to the changing needs of its clientele as it is to new education research. Knowing that separation was a great concern, the leaders added a new feature to younger classes: Caregivers are asked to move upstairs for a few minutes and watch their kids at a distance, letting them take a first step toward independence. Likewise, My Gym UWS chooses to maintain the same class schedule during the summer as the rest of the year because many parents like to keep the routine to which their children are accustomed.

The list of My Gym UWS’s nurturing and responsive programs goes on, but at the end of the day, the mantra here comes down to Johnston’s earnest words: “It’s really hard to have a bad day when you are surrounded by children who are happy to see you and are having fun.”

And we don’t have to take her word for it; the devoted students who return to My Gym UWS time and time again are the proof that’s in the pudding.

Elisabeth Frankel Reed blogs regularly at newyorkfamily. com. She was born and raised in New York and loves exploring the city with her husband and two children, Brandon and Julia.

For more information, visit my-gym.com/nyc or call 212-724-3400.

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starting out

AGES 0-3

Happy World Breastfeeding Week! (Or Happy National Breastfeeding Month if you’re reading this after the first week of August.) What a year it has been for breastfeeding— from the contentious TIME magazine cover to news coverage across the nation, breastfeeding has been the center of parenting debates. Campaigns going on around the country this month encourage women to breastfeed for at least the first six months after birth, but we’re not here to tell you how to make a very personal parenting choice. That being said, for women who do choose to breastfeed, we’ve compiled a list of gear and other goods that will help you on your journey to master this motherly task.

Nursing Pillows

best breast buys In Honor Of National Breastfeeding Month, We’ve Gathered Some Essential Products That Breastfeeding Moms Should Consider

By Sarah Albert 24

New York Family | August 2012

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Nursing pillows are a must for breastfeeding moms— they help you and your baby stay comfortable during those all-important feedings. My Brest Friend snaps around your body to fully support the baby while feeding and comes with a pocket to keep anything you need within reach. And twin moms rejoice—they make a pillow for two. Alternatively, the Boppy pillow is perfect for lots of activities. It’s excellent for feeding and also makes a great lounging or tummy time pillow. mybrestfriend.com, boppy.com

Nursing Covers For those who want to cover up when breastfeeding in public, a nursing cover can keep your private time with the baby concealed. Bebe Au Lait is the champion of covers; special technology keeps the cover open and away from the baby so airflow and eye contact are still possible. For those with less space in the diaper bag, MiniMe BabyGear created the Breastfeeding Buddy, a clip that will turn any blanket into a nursing cover, saving you money and space.

Many babies, however, don’t like covers—and that’s where MoBoleez comes in. Its breastfeeding hats cover the baby’s head, protecting him or her from sun, while also shielding your body from the public. bebeaulait.com, minimebabygear.com, moboleez.com

Clothing Shopping for flattering and functional nursingwear can be daunting. Glamourmom has long been a favorite of nursing moms for style and convenience. We love their Nursing Bra Long Tank (available with tummy control).

It’s quite stylish, so most people won’t even know you’re wearing a nursing top. The same can be said about BOOB nursing tops. The super cute short-sleeved shirt is a reliable pick. Purchasing Bravado’s Essential Nursing Tank is like getting two tops for the price of one; the stretchy material is perfect for a growing belly and the built-in nursing bra is continued on page 26 www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 11:42 AM

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continued from page 24

perfect post-pregnancy. And don’t forget about PJs. Aimee Nursing Pajamas are braless, keep nursing pads in place (if you use them), and allow room for your shrinking tummy.

Belabumbum’s Colette Ruffle Chemise is a comfortable sleepwear gem that will help moms feel beautiful. For the dreaded social event or regular workday when you know you’ll need to nurse or pump, look no further than the Milk Keyhole Dress (or any of the Milk brand’s threads). It’s comfortable, dressy, and easy to nurse in. glamourmom.com, boobdesign.com, bravadodesigns.com, nursinggowns.com, belabumbum.com, milknursingwear.com

Bras A good nursing bra is invaluable.

You want one that’s easy to use and doesn’t look like something your greatgrandmother would wear. Cake Lingerie adds the sexy factor to easy feeding, while La Leche League International is known for its comfortable and affordable wire and no wire varieties.

Bravado’s Allure Underwire Nursing Bra (pictured) features spacing fabric, which is lightweight, breathable, and allows air to circulate while hiding breast pads. And if you’re pumping, make sure to check out the Medela Easy Expression Bustier and the PumpEase Hands Free Pumping Bra; both are created so you can pump sans hands. cakelingerie.com, llliclothes.com, bravadodesigns.com, medelabreastfeedingus.com, snugabell.com

Breast Care Any mother who has breastfed will tell you that doing so has side effects you might not expect. Lansinoh HPA Lanolin is the best of breast creams; mothers have been using it for years to help relieve the pain that comes with nursing. Bamboobies are economical and washable nursing pads that are fantastic for absorbing any leakage without showing through most clothes. For a night out on the town, try LilyPadz Nursing Pads. They put gentle pressure on the breast to keep it from leaking, are reusable, and are designed not to show through tops. lansinoh.com, buybamboobies.com, lilypadz.com

who don’t want the fancier versions, and it even includes bottles. medelabreastfeedingus.com, ameda.com, thefirstyears.com

Bottles Picking the right bottle is important to avoid confusing your baby when switching back and forth between breastfeeding and bottles. The First Years Breastflow Bottle’s patented 2-in-1 nipple allows the baby to control the flow of breast milk. The Adiri NxGen Nurser not only feeds like a breast, it’s shaped like one too. The similar feel and flow is the ultimate in comfort. Another great option is the BARE Bottle—the only air-free bottle on the market with a nipple that extends and retracts when feeding. thefirstyears.com, reliabrand.com, bittylab.com

Breastfeeding Books While reading may fall off your to-do list after having a child, you should take a few moments to check out If These Boobs Could Talk (seen on pg. 24). The hilarious take on motherhood will make you feel a little less lonely and a little more sane. For practical advice, get Mama Knows Breast, which is full of handy tips on all things breastfeeding. theworldaccordingtotoddlers.com, mamaknowsbreast.com

Other After pumping, you need to make sure your milk is stored properly. Moms love the Lansinoh Breastmilk Storage Bags; they’re strong, pre-sterilized, and BPA-free. For those who feel like they’re losing precious milk that gets stuck to the side of the bag, try the Sensible Lines Milk Tray. Milk is frozen in one-ounce serving trays, eliminating waste and taking up very little freezer space. lansinoh.com, sensiblelines.com Many moms will admit to “momnesia”—their uncanny habit of forgetting even the simplest things. Milk Bands Nursing Bracelets were created to help you remember the most important thing: your baby’s feedings. They’re designed so you can know which breast was used last and even track how long or what time your baby fed. milkbands.com

Pumps A pump gives Mom a break and Dad (or grandma/grandpa/baby nurse) a chance to bond with the baby. Medela’s Pump In Style Advanced (pictured) is a terrific option. Though a bit pricy, it comes in a tote bag so you can take it anywhere, and it features Medela’s patented 2-Phase Expression technology that pumps just as your baby would feed. Ameda Purely Yours is another great choice, with a regular and a pricier ultra version that comes with tons of accessories. Both versions come with CustomControl to monitor suction and speed, a CustomFit Flange System, and a car adapter (for when you’re stuck in New York traffic). The First Years miPump Double Electric breast pump is an affordable, under $100 option for moms

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The Nursery Works’ Cole Glider and Ottoman isn’t your average rocking chair.

The ottoman has a storage shelf underneath, which is the perfect solution for any city apartment’s cramped quarters. The glider and ottoman combo can adapt to any living space after the baby stops nursing. nurseryworks.com

For more great baby finds, check out our New York Family Baby blog at newyorkfamily.com.

www.newyorkfamily.com

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growing up

When The

Earth Rocks

And Rolls Parenting Expert Marsha Greenberg Provides Tips On How To Discuss Natural Disasters With Your Kids

By Heather Ouida

AGES 4-10

About a year ago, many New Yorkers experienced noticeable tremors from a small earthquake. A week later, we braced for Hurricane Irene, which was projected to hit New York headon. Luckily, both events ended up being quite mild. But in a world where media coverage has a 24/7 presence, our children are exposed to more local, national, and significant weather happenings than ever before. Most recently, New York and many other areas in this country have experienced extreme and often fatal heat conditions and power outages. With ever-increasing incidents of severe weather occurrences come questions—questions that are, for many parents, not so easy to answer. To get some guidance, I spoke with child and family development and social work professional Marsha Greenberg.

Do you have a general phrase that you find useful when talking to children about natural disasters and significant weather occurrences?

One of the expressions that I think is very helpful is: “Let’s talk about how the earth rocks and rolls.”

Due to the media age we live in, many children in NYC often hear about natural disasters happening in other parts of the country or around the world. Do kids often ask, “Are we safe?”

Younger kids don’t always ask this question because they may be too anxious about the answer. They may act out instead—tantrums, potty accidents, relationships with friends. Your child may hear something about a natural disaster but he may not say anything directly because he continued on page 30

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doesn’t always know how to ask. Older children may ask, “Can that happen here?” If it is something that most likely will not ever happen in your area, you can say, “No, a tsunami (or whatever is being asked about) cannot happen here.”

What should we say to children if the natural disasters they are asking about could happen where they live?

Parents could start by gathering information on what their kid already knows. You can say to your child, “Tell me everything you know about earthquakes.” When you get a sense of what she already knows, you get a sense of what she is really asking. A child may respond by saying something like, “It’s when the ground opens up and everything falls in.” A response to this could be, “That’s possible, but not very probable.” This idea of possible versus probable can be very useful when talking about disasters. I frame it in terms of candy. “Do you think it’s possible your mom would let you eat all the candy in the world, or probable?”

Most kids will say it’s possible, not probable.

What type of conversation should we have with our kids if they ask what would happen if a natural disaster happened in their own city or community?

Parents can start by saying, “That’s a really good question. Let’s think about what we would do together. Do you remember the last time our lights went out? What did we do? That’s right, we used flashlights.” What you’re doing with kids is helping them problem solve.

What if my child seems really scared? Isn’t it better not to over-communicate?

As parents, we can affirm their feelings by saying, “Yes, you may feel very scared and you may have lots of feelings.

Let’s think of other times you were scared. What did we do then? We’ll go slow and help you with your feelings.” Let the kids direct the conversation. You don’t know how much information they really want.

How much should we read into our children’s questions?

Although we need to be mindful, we don’t need to read into everything our child does or says. For example, there’s this great episode in the old Diahann Carroll show where her kindergarten son is painting in all black. The teachers have a meeting with her expressing their concerns. They have her talk to experts about possible depression and anger that her son is feeling. When she finally asks her son about his paintings, he says, “It’s the only color paint I can reach on the shelf.” Sometimes, it is what it is.

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What should parents say if their children ask, “Did people die?”

If they ask directly, you can say, “Yes, I heard that some did.” The next question children often ask is, “Are you going to die?” Again, ask the child, what they think. Most kids will say yes. You can then say, “Well you’re right, that does happen but mommies and daddies usually do not die until they are much older. It’s not going to happen now.” Parents can make their answer relatable by also saying, “I asked my mommy that very same question when I was your age, because I had those worries too, and I liked knowing she was not going to die for a very long time.”

What if a child continues to seem anxious about death and dying?

I like to say to kids, “I could worry about dying a long, long time from now, but I need to decide if I’m going to worry a lot or a little.” So this is letting them know that worrying is a bit of a choice. There’s a little bit of hard wiring in children, but for many, worrying is a choice.

Does talking about natural disasters at school make children’s anxiety better or worse?

It’s sometimes tricky when schools set up fundraisers to help with natural disasters. While I think it’s great to do these things, some schools don’t know how vulnerable kids are. Parents can say to their children, “I know you’ve been talking about the tsunami at school. I was thinking about that and wondering what it would be like to have gone through that. What do you think?” Again, you need to know your child and make sure to go slow.

And what if your community does experience a natural disaster?

In this case, you have to treat it as a trauma, and there are people and organizations to help children with that. It’s scary for kids when all the adults around them who usually take care of them seem upset and vulnerable. You can acknowledge this by saying, “This may be upsetting because when we used to see Mack at the grocery store, he used to always joke around, and now Mack looks very sad.” You begin to lay it out in a way that can be helpful to children: Those bad things can happen but with time it gets better.

Heather Ouida is the co-founder of Mommybites (formerly known as babybites). Mommybites is a relationship network that connects moms to moms, moms to experts, moms to education, and moms to the best parenting resources available to make moms’ lives happier and easier.

Marsha Greenberg is a parenting expert and author of Knack Raising Your Toddler (Knack, 2010). For more information, visit marshagreenberg.com.

www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 11:13 AM

kid report

She Did It! Andrew Schwartz

How 11-Year-Old Queens Native Fátima Ptacek Became The New Voice Of Dora The Explorer B y M a g g ie M c N ama r a ¡Vámanos! (Let’s go!) Since 2000, Nickelodeon’s popular cartoon character Dora the Explorer has encouraged kids to join in on her adventures through an animated forest full of surprises. An eight-year-old bilingual Latina, the courageous youngster travels great distances with her monkey friend, Boots, while teaching little viewers Spanish phrases along the way.

Behind the Dora we all know and love on screen is a girl who pours new life into the vivacious voyager. For the past two years, 11-year-old Queens native Fátima Ptacek has been the source of Dora’s declarations.

“I really look up to Dora. I’ve watched her since I was little,” Fátima explains. “I love the fact that she interacts so well with the children. That’s one thing that I remember…

Dora always made me feel like I was her best friend.”

Fátima began her career at just five years old as an actress and model, starring in television commercials and moving into film and modeling for major management company Wilhelmina. But beyond her impressive résumé, Fátima is simply a natural for the part.

A bright, young Latina herself, Fátima is bilingual in English and Spanish, just like her cartoon counterpart. But the two share more than a common ethnicity and a knack for languages—Fátima also loves adventure. And while her own adventures around New York City may not involve dodging a kleptomaniac fox or following the instructions of a talking map, Fátima and her family love to explore local museums, Central Park, and even the forests of Pennsylvania, searching for salamanders and other wildlife. Dora and Fátima also share a spirit of determinism. Fátima prides herself in completing any project she begins and hopes that, with the help of Dora, she can encourage other kids to do the same.

Fátima was actually born the year “Dora the Explorer” became a regular television series, so the young actress grew up watching the show and now brings her admiration and memories of Dora with her each time she enters the sound booth. Fátima readily admits to screaming and crying in happy disbelief upon receiving the news from Nickelodeon that she landed the part.

Personifying an animated character allows Fátima to “put a smile on so many children’s faces all over the world.”

As the pre-teen explains, it’s an honor to share in that role, especially considering the show’s commitment to learning and language. Fátima currently studies Mandarin in school— supplementing her knowledge of Spanish and English—and she feels that it is important for both children and adults to explore multilingualism. In addition to the obvious communication advantages, she says, “it can open doors and opportunities.”

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But what’s most impressive about the “real” Dora is just how beyond real she truly is. Fátima is a student, an actress, a model, a gymnast (with regular practices at Chelsea Piers), a horse back rider—the list seems endless. And when it comes to juggling all of these activities, Fátima immediately credits her supportive family. Her parents help her “go with the flow” but never pressure her to do anything she doesn’t enjoy. As she casually puts it: “As long as I have fun, I don’t care.” It’s this fun-loving, adventurous attitude that carries Fátima through the demands of her busy life.

This impressive young actress has grand plans for the future, too. She wants to continue acting (hinting at high hopes for her own TV show with Nickelodeon), eventually earn a law degree, and, one day, become the first female president of the United States. “Look out, Hillary Clinton!” she jokes.

Fátima owes this ambitious spirit not only to her family, but also to the role models she’s met along the way. She greatly admires fellow Nickelodeon actress Miranda Cosgrove and First Lady Michelle Obama—whom she had the privilege of meeting on the set of Sesame Street. “I think it was one of the greatest honors in the world,” Fátima says.

Until Fátima Ptacek makes her bold move for the White House, children across the globe can continue to enjoy her charismatic character and inspiring eloquence. Turning twelve this month and with so much more in store for her future, there really is no telling how far this young girl will go.

Tune In This

Month!

Premiering on Monday, August 13 on Nickelodeon, “Dora’s Fantastic Gymnastics Adventure” will capture the imaginations of little ones as Dora practices for the Fantastic Gymnastics Show and receives a special delivery: a beautiful rainbow ribbon. This means that Dora gets to start the show with her ribbon dance! But Swiper comes in and steals the ribbon and the show can’t start until Dora gets it back. Can Dora and Boots find the ribbon so she can perform her special routine?

Tune in later this month to find out what happens! www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 11:24 AM

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year. She says her motivation is two-fold; she’s fascinated by the work and empathizes with parents struggling with the possibility of their child needing special treatment. She’s been there herself with her son, now a sixth grader, who was ultimately diagnosed with PANDAS, which Weiss describes as a predisposition to anxiety and OCD brought on by an unusual form of strep.

In her experience with her son, she learned that “a parent is a child’s best advocate. You know your child better than anyone else. If you think something is wrong, you better stick up for [him or her],” she says.

By sparing parents the hassle and discouragement of trying to work with the wrong doctors, Weiss aims to keep time, worry, and expense in check through a boutique consultation experience that’s personal, specialized, caring, and, most of all, helpful. Plus, she’s so jazzed by her work that she regularly posts related articles and studies on Facebook and Twitter, helping other parents stay in the know.

For more information, visit askstefanie.com.

The Insider Sarah Birnbaum remembers the moment doctors shared the news of her child’s mental health evaluation. After her awkward laughter wasn’t returned, the truth of her first child’s condition fully seized her.

“That was the beginning of my new life,” Birnbaum says, whose daughter is on the autistic spectrum.

In the course of that new life, doing everything she can to help her daughter, Birnbaum has gathered a wealth of information on doctors, schools, support groups, government programs, and anything a local family with a special needs child might require.

After years of informally advising friends and acquaintances on every manner of challenge related to getting their children the right services and schooling, she took up a suggestion to turn her knowledge and empathy into a business as parent advocate and special needs advisor. She launched New York Special Needs Support in the spring of 2008.

As Birnbaum describes on her website, her professional experience as a web producer, with an emphasis on “keeping track of many moving parts and doing whatever it takes to move a project forward to its deadline,” gave her the skills and attitude she needed to help her daughter.

“My goal is to be to parents whatever it is they need me to be, until they don’t need me anymore,” she says.

To that end, Birnbaum meets with families to hear their stories and provide resources, options, and advice for sorting out schooling, mental health evaluations, doctors’ appointments, and anything else that might fall through the cracks along the way.

“I describe myself as that tesseract from A Wrinkle In Time,” she says, referring to the special space portals in the classic children’s book. In other words, she sees herself as closing the gap between her client’s needs and the appropriate solutions.

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New York Family | August 2012

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And her work doesn’t stop at consulting. She gives free talks several times a year to inform groups of parents about how to navigate the system and be advocates for their children.

“You will notice things other parents don’t notice and you will notice things that doctors won’t notice,” she remarks. “You are privy to new, secret knowledge that you probably never wanted to know.”

For more information, visit nyspecialneeds.com.

The Lifer Joanna Dreifus felt a connection to children with special needs long before she became a mom caring for two of her own. It began with her mother, who was a special needs teacher. When Dreifus was in high school, her mom helped her get a job at an afterschool program where she assisted kids with Down Syndrome and other disabilities. “Honestly, I’ve always been interested in child development, health, and related issues,” Dreifus says. “When other kids were into sports, I was the candy striper.”

Ultimately, she garnered a master’s degree in public health from Columbia University, and her impressive professional achievements include being a board member for the YAI Network—one of the largest social service agencies in the city—and a grant maker at New York Community Trust, where she helped fund health organizations serving people of all ages with special needs.

Divorced when her children were very young, Dreifus has spent much of her parenting life as a single mom, ensuring that her son and daughter, now six and nine respectively, get the services and schooling they need.

“Between them, I feel like we’ve taken on the entire alphabet of special needs diagnoses,” she says.

In January of 2007, while she was still married, Dreifus launched a shopping blog for moms aptly called My Mom Shops. Though there was no overt connection to special needs, Driefus has found that whenever she alludes to something going on with her children, or runs an article on special needs products for her kids, the response is always strong.

It’s what first gave her the indication that there was some kind of advisory role for her in the special needs world.

A few years later, she wrote an article for New York Family called “20 Things To Know If Your Child Has Special Needs,” which focuses on many of the everyday challenges that parents face, like dealing with haircuts or finding a bit of time for themselves.

“I want to pay it forward because I really have such a wealth of experience,” she says.

After years of advising friends and acquaintances informally, she launched the website Special Kids NYC in June, to help parents of children with special needs deal with everything from developmental delays to neurological disorders to mental health issues. After a private consultation, she’ll work with parents to address issues big and small, from how to get their child the best schooling to how much to disclose about their child’s diagnosis or condition to others.

For more info, visit specialkidsnyc.com. www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 3:01 PM

C

hocolate chips. Vanilla frosting. Rainbow sprinkles. Brownie bites. Coconut flakes. Cookie dough. The mouthwatering toppings that adorn the delectable goodies at CRUMBS Bake Shop are so tempting, you just might forget to pick up the kids from daycare!

So who’s behind this culinary sweets craze? Nearly ten years ago, Mia and Jason Bauer helped reinvent the individual dessert, opening the first CRUMBS on the Upper West Side in 2003—a time when there were only a few bakeries in the city devoted to cupcakes. Soon, New Yorkers flocked to the homey cupcake haven in search of their oversized cupcakes with mostly cream cheese-based frosting and delectable, edible embellishments. The business quickly took off as the Bauers began dreaming bigger dreams for their burgeoning bakery. Just last year, CRUMBS went public and now boasts more than 50 cupcake varieties in 51 locations across the country.

On a warm day earlier this summer, Mia and Jason spoke to us about their smash-success bakery business and their family life with two small children—Annabelle, 4 years old, and Zack, 2. Indulge yourself and read on to find out how Mia and Jason built a business good enough to eat.

You’re living the dream—leaving law and politics (as prior legislative counsel for the New York City Council in the Giuliani Administration) to open a bakery! How did you know you were ready to make the switch?

Mia: I think it was a culmination of a lot of things. I was working…just crazy hours and it occurred to me that…all the fruits of my labor were for someone else’s cause, so to speak. I really wanted to do something that belonged to Jason and me, and we wanted to do something together.

There is an energy about our relationship that I knew would translate very well in the business world.

Jason: I grew up in a family beverage distribution business and started working full time in the business after I graduated college. After that was sold in the ‘90s, I started a company called Famous Fixins, a manufacturer of celebrity licensed consumer products, like Britney Spears bubble gum and NSYNC lip balm. After eight years and over 20 products, I was ready for a change and sold the business to start CRUMBS with Mia.

By Jenna Helwig Photography By Jeffrey Shaw Hair & Makeup

By Kim Baker For Glama-Zon Beauty Cosmetics Styling By Monica Cotto www.newyorkfamily.com

FEATURE_COVER_0812.indd 41

What were your expectations when you opened the first CRUMBS? Mia: The goal was to have a neighborhood bakery where I knew everybody and their kids, and I made all their birthday cakes.

Jason: When we started CRUMBS, we were just dating.

But we knew we had incredible chemistry not only in our personal lives, but we also really complemented each other in business. Mia kept me grounded. I was always looking to grow and expand the business very quickly, but once we created short-term and long-term goals together, every decision was put through that filter before proceeding. continued on page 42 August 2012 | New York Family 41

7/23/12 11:05 AM

continued from page 41

So you weren’t married when you went into this together? You just dove in?

Mia: We were dating. Now, when I talk about it, I’m like, “Wow, we were crazy!” But it didn’t seem so weird at the time at all.

At that point you were in the shop all day, baking and selling?

Mia: We would bake all night. Very quickly I realized that I couldn’t keep up with the volume, so we hired people to do the baking. I love the customer service, so I wanted to be behind the counter.

What does your job consist of now? What’s an average day like?

Jason: Mia is involved in product development while I now focus on new business opportunities.

Mia: You know, it’s funny because people ask me about getting out of the corporate world, [but] it’s kind of come full circle. Still so much of it is about product innovation, new ideas, and baking and figuring out how to improve what we already have out there. Mostly the products—cupcakes, cookies, cakes, pies, cake pops, you name it.

What is it that appeals to people about cupcakes?

Mia: First and foremost the nostalgia of it—cupcakes are very fun and playful and reminiscent of childhood—and the idea of the individualized dessert that can be specific to your tastes. Jason always likes to speak to the price point, too. It’s such an affordable kind of luxury, especially with the economy the way it is. You might not be able to take your family out to dinner, but you can bring home a six-pack of cupcakes and be a hero.

How do you balance a growing business and being the parents of two small children? Is there even such a thing as balance?

Mia: I actually think I do balance—maybe that’s because I sacrifice my sleep! I really give 100% to both, but…you need a lot of support.

We have a phenomenal family around us who’s always there to help out. We work extraordinarily well together, Jason and I, so we cover for each other. And I guess you just get good at identifying what’s important versus urgent and just really, really prioritizing.

Jason: It is hard, but I try! My kids are my priority. When Mia was pregnant with both kids, I never missed a single doctor’s appointment or check-up. Nothing was as important! [The kids are] at an age where we can talk on the phone now—or FaceTime—so whenever I need a fix, I call them. Now more than ever, I look forward to the weekends so I can spend every moment with them.

Tell me about your parenting style.

Mia: I’m all about positive reinforcement. I don’t believe in saying “no” a lot. I believe in complimenting and rewarding, so to speak, when my children do what’s expected of them, as opposed to criticizing them when they don’t do what I want them to do.

What are some of your favorite things to do together in the city?

Mia: We’re big park-goers, but I like to mix that up. We’ll bring a picnic or paint sets to the park. Really, even just walking down the street to get ice cream is just so stimulating—[there’s] so much to talk about, so much conversation that comes from it. That in itself is a huge adventure.

Sand Pail

Dessert Every summer, this is one of my kids’ favorite “baking” projects. The best part is: it doesn’t require baking and kids of all ages can do it (even the little ones).

I’ve included the most basic recipe, but you can get as creative as you like by adding other ingredients!

Ingredients -Sand pail -Large container Cool Whip -8 ounces cream cheese (whipped is preferred) -Large package instant chocolate pudding (you can use vanilla if you prefer) -2 1/2 cups milk -1 1/4 pounds crushed cookies (preferably CRUMBS, but Oreos will do) -Gummy worms, alligators, fish, or any other gummy animal of your choice Directions Buy a new sand pail and wash it out with soap and water.

Mix the Cool Whip and cream cheese.

Mix instant chocolate pudding with milk.

Start with the crushed cookies and spread a layer on the bottom of the pail.

Add a layer of Cool Whip mixture, then a layer of pudding mixture. Repeat all three. (In our house, we add layers of buttercream frosting, cupcake CRUMBS, and sprinkles). Finish with crushed cookies and place gummies on top.

Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes.

Enjoy eating your sand pail!

continued on page 44

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You go out to the Hamptons in the summertime. What are your favorite things to do there?

Jason: The kids love being outside and running around all day on the grass. Swimming has become a highlight as they are both learning. Eating outdoors is a must, whether it’s Babette’s for breakfast or Bostwick’s for lunch. And at around 4pm every day, we head over to Main Beach for ice cream on the boardwalk and some sandcastles. [The kids] fall asleep so hard at night; you know it was a great day!

Mia: We play with the kids at the house, we cook a lot…

There’s amazing, amazing food there—and I don’t even mean the restaurants, but the local fruit stands. Yesterday, I took Zack to a dairy farm and they sliced off cheese for us that they had just made.

CRUMBS is a family affair. What is it like working with your husband?

Mia: Phenomenal. I say that all the time. We don’t see eye to eye, but that’s kind of the beauty of it. We’re not obstinate people [either] personally [or] professionally, so we will compromise, always, and the formula kind of works.

How do you divide up the work and chores in your family life?

Mia: [Laughs] That’s funny you should say that—[it’s] a neverending topic of amusement for the two of us. We joke about how I’m not sure there is a division of labor at home. Jason is a wonderful parent, but I think [that home is] pretty much my domain.

Jason: I think it’s transitioned over time. I used to be the “boss” at work and Mia the “boss” at home…but as the business grew rapidly (as did our kids) it became more important to always be on the same page with every decision. One thing we have always agreed on is that the kids come first! They are and always will be our priority.

I’m home every night for bath time and at least an hour of play time before they go to sleep. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Mia: She’s got a couple. Sometimes it’s the decorative element to it that she loves. She loves our rose cupcakes. And sometimes it’s the flavor profile. She loves the cotton candy.

Do you have rules for how often the kids are allowed to eat sweets?

Mia: Yeah, my kids eat an absurd [amount of sweets].

I rationalize it because they are actually excellent eaters.

They’ll eat fish, endless vegetables, fruit. They’ll eat a really great, proper meal and then they’ll eat, like, three cupcakes.

And then candy before they go to bed. It’s awful!

Did your own childhood love of sweets play a role deciding to open a cupcake business?

Mia: I had a ferocious sweet tooth, always. I ate every dessert everywhere, was always, always baking. I always say that with the advent of Food Network, kids know that it’s a viable career. [But] I had no idea that that could be a career path. I loved baking; I had a sweet tooth. I wanted to go into retail; it was something that appealed to me even in childhood. So all the elements were there, it just never even occurred to me until I met Jason.

“It’s such an affordable kind of luxury. You might not be able to take your family out to dinner, but you can bring home a six-pack of cupcakes and be a hero.”

What are your son and daughter like right now?

Mia: They have very distinct personalities. Annabelle has an unbelievable enthusiasm for everything. She’s very excited about everything. It’s so inspiring. I wish everyone were like that, including myself. My son is also pretty enthusiastic about things, but he’s kind of a maniac in the best possible way. He has us laughing all day long.

Do the kids taste-test the cupcakes?

Mia: Zack actually doesn’t have much of a sweet tooth.

He likes desserts, but not like Annabelle. Annabelle has always been a fanatic and a great taste-tester. She’s got a very sophisticated sweet palate.

Does Annabelle have a favorite cupcake?

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Did his entrepreneurial skills inspire you?

Mia: Yeah. He hadn’t done retail, but after spending some time with him I saw that if you wanted to open up a business, you did open up a business. It was just that simple, really, and I knew I could learn so much from him. It became very exciting, the thought that he could take care of the piece of it that I knew nothing about and I could learn from him.

What advice would you give other parents interested in starting their own businesses?

Jason: Love what you do and take it all in stride. As an entrepreneur, your best day and your worst could sometimes be the same day.

Mia: I always say, “do it.” Maybe that’s so impractical, but I always say it’s not even really about whether you succeed or fail. It’s just being able to say that you did it, that you didn’t let something stop you. It’s been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I still can’t believe I did it. I say that to myself all the time. It’s ten years later and I’m like, “I can’t believe I started my own business.” How great is that?

Jenna Helwig, Founder of Rosaberry, is a culinary instructor, personal chef, and freelance writer. She blogs for Yummy Delicious at newyorkfamily.com.

For more of our interview with Mia and Jason, visit newyorkfamily.com. www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 3:03 PM

The

Case for

Character A New Book Reports On The Surprising Ways That Traits Like Grit And Curiosity Can Improve Success In School And—Even Better—In Life B y T a l i R o s e n b l a tt - C o h e n

A

journalist with long-time gigs as an editor at Harper’s and the New York Times magazine, NYC dad Paul Tough has spent much of his career thinking, reporting, and writing about education. In his first book, Whatever It Takes: Geoffrey Canada’s Quest to Change Harlem and America, Tough chronicles the challenges and triumphs of the famous Harlem Children’s Zone. His new book is called How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character. In part, it grew out of his reporting on kids from low-income neighborhoods. But it also became personal. “I had my son, Ellington, who is now three,” says Tough, “and I found myself wondering about this question as a parent as well: What do you do to help your child succeed? continued on page 48 www.newyorkfamily.com

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Your book makes the case that non-cognitive skills (which you call “character”), even more than academic achievement, are the key to long-term success. Can you define non-cognitive skills for our readers?

The phrase comes from economists and, in particular, a Nobel Prize-winning economist from the University of Chicago, James Heckman. He started using this phrase about ten years ago to explain what he was seeing in his data. He found that there were certain kids who scored low on IQ tests but would go on to succeed, or who would score high on IQ tests but not go on to succeed. As he looked deeper into the data, he identified these other skills that seemed to determine success. Some of the skills have to do with selfregulation, like conscientiousness and self-control. Some of them have to do with optimism, curiosity, zest— basically wanting to explore new things. And grit and perseverance are another set—they’re about intensity, sticking with something, bouncing back from failure. In lots of ways, I find “character” a more accurate or evocative term for these skills because it gets at how important they are. They are a really deep part of what it means to be human.

You place a lot of importance on the first few years and parent-child attachment. Should we now be worried about a kind of backlash against trends like early enrichment programs, where everyone shifts from an extreme focus on academic performance to an intense anxiety about connection?

I do worry about stoking parental anxiety, but I hope the book will encourage parents to relax rather than freak out. To me, what the research on attachment implies is that most children need a basic level of love and security and nurturance. Studies on attachment indicate that 60 percent of American one-year-olds display a secure attachment with their parent or parents. That’s a pretty big group.

Attachment, the way I see it, is not a way to produce super-children; it’s about providing enough love and attention that your children wind up in the secure 60 percent. You can make a lot of mistakes as a parent (as we all do) and still get it right. And if you get it right, your child has a big advantage starting out.

“What I took away from all the research is that parents are really important, more important than anything else, but the way we think we’re important is often at odds with reality.”

What do you think is the role of parents in ensuring children’s success?

At this particular moment we’re living in, there’s a lot of anxiety among parents about how to help our children succeed. I think New York parents care very deeply about this question, but I also think we hear a lot of conflicting messages—not just about how to help our kids succeed, but about what kind of success we really want for them. What I took away from the research is that parents are critically important to a child’s development, more important than anything else, but that the elements of parenting we’ve come to believe are most important are often at odds with reality.

Especially in wealthier neighborhoods, I think we put way too much emphasis on cognition and intelligence and test scores.

There is this idea that IQ and academic skills are the best predictors of a child’s success, and so there’s this intense pressure around tests at every stage of life, from preschool to LSATs, and [surrounding] admissions to the right schools. But what the research says is that, in fact, the most important thing we can do to help our kids develop the skills they need to succeed is to give them close, nurturing support in the first years of their lives.

Now, where things get complicated is that as kids get older, they need something very different from us. They need less support. They need us to let them fail, to let them figure things out for themselves, to let them be more independent and solve their own problems. And what the research doesn’t tell us is exactly when and how we’re supposed to switch from one style of parenting to the other.

That’s a real challenge for parents.

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You talk about adversity and how experiencing some adversity in childhood or early adulthood can make for a more well-adjusted and successful adult. If one is lucky enough (or perhaps unlucky enough) not to face much adversity in their childhood, are there ways that parents can challenge their son or daughter?

It’s important to note that the kinds of adversity many kids are experiencing in the South Bronx or in Harlem isn’t good in any way. It does real damage. But for affluent parents, it’s about a bigger shift in how you think about childhood. As we all know, kids in high achieving, high pressure schools are working incredibly hard. They are often burned out, stressed out. But at the same time, people like Dominic Randolph [the head of the Riverdale Country School] are right—these kids are not experiencing real failure; they’re not open to real adversity or taking real chances.

They’re not even enrolling in classes they might be interested in if it might pull their GPA down. But you can make the case that those are just the kind of classes they should be taking. In some ways, the advice I would have for parents in that situation is to expand their definition of successful to include [the word] “challenge” much more than it is included now. The big message is to give kids the opportunity to take on more serious challenges, to go off in strange directions sometimes, and have the opportunity to fail.

Why write a chapter that’s all about chess? Whatever skills chess helps children to develop, could they learn those from an art program, a musical instrument, or sports?

I think so. Chess was there to show how far kids could go with this type of non-cognitive training. We think of continued on page 50 www.newyorkfamily.com

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chess as such a cognitive skill. But the most amazing thing to me going on at I.S. 318 [the Brooklyn middle school in a low-income neighborhood which won the 8th grade national chess championship] was that the chess teacher, Elizabeth Spiegel, was able to use non-cognitive techniques to increase her kids’ skill level. Those skills can absolutely come from something other than chess. Sports, when they’re done right, develop the same things. Kids learn that they can exceed what they think of as their limits—that they can keep pushing themselves. When you’re practicing piano you get that same kind of instant feedback that you do in a chess game. When you’re playing chess and you make a mistake, an opponent takes your pawn; when you’re playing piano and make a mistake, you sound terrible. That sort of feedback, if you have the right kind of teacher, can lead to much bigger success.

Going back to optimism, zest, and curiosity—how does one get at those? Can they be taught?

One thing that was really striking to me in the research was how much those skills were correlated with good parenting. When parents in the first few years were able to create strong attachment, a real sense of security in kids, those kids were more optimistic, more curious, and were happier and psychologically healthier as a result. Those skills are really built very early on.

And what if they’re not?

Schools can do a lot. [But] the way we run our schools is not focused on curiosity. When you’re focused on tests, you’re focused on a single right answer. Successful scientists, though, are ones who go beyond the right answer and look for alternative solutions. There are ways to teach that and it involves a more open approach to learning than traditional public schools typically offer. Optimism and happiness are definitely related. Some of these techniques that [the charter school group] KIPP is using—positive psychology and cognitive behavioral techniques—are designed to help kids with optimism and psychological wellbeing. I was really struck by the way these interventions helped kids re-orient themselves in adolescence. At that age, they can think about things in a much more self-reflective way: Why do I feel this way? Why do I do this? Why do I keep making the mistakes I’m making? I think schools can really help kids reframe things and think in a broader way.

If you were suddenly U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan—with unlimited power—what changes would you make to our school systems?

A lot of what I would do is with kids at the low end of the income spectrum. I think the evidence is that if we want children in chaotic homes to do well in school, we need to provide supports for them that go beyond the classroom.

The attachment-focused parenting interventions that I described in the book are an important and effective way to do that, but they’re not the only way.

This is a touchy subject, because Americans are rightly

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concerned about the government getting involved in the way our families operate. But I think we need to rethink the question of where the public responsibility for a child’s wellbeing begins and ends.

Not surprisingly, [as the Secretary of Education] I’d also think more about character strengths and non-cognitive skills and how our system could value and measure those skills. I worry that focusing on test scores as a way to measure success for teachers and principals will just continue to emphasize skills that I think are not the most relevant for success and push out the kind of learning that, I think, we all understand is more valuable.

We keep hearing that American education isn’t up to par with learning in many other industrialized nations.

As someone who has covered education for much of his career, how do you feel about state of education in this country?

I’m very concerned about the achievement gap and the fact that, in some ways, it’s getting worse in terms of class and race. In terms of the education of the majority of kids in the United States, I tend to feel more optimistic. There are lots of schools I visit where kids seem to be getting a great education from Pre-K all the way up through high school.

I do feel like this issue of high pressure in schools, the emphasis on tests and not enough on character, does make a difference. But part of the reason I feel less concerned about this in well-off communities is that parents in those communities are really good about responding to research, saying, “Aha! We did go a little too far in this direction.” On the whole, my concern continues to be kids at the bottom and how we still have not designed an education system that allows them to succeed.

After years of lots of love and attachment, New York City mom of three, Tali Rosenblatt-Cohen, now plans to make sure her children face a lot of adversity.

For more on school and admissions, look for New York Family’s Ultimate Guide To Local Education, 2012-2013 Edition, coming out in October—or find the digital version on newyorkfamily.com.

www.newyorkfamily.com

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1. Mark Your Calendars Call it Black Tuesday. The Tuesday after Labor Day is when a number of private nursery schools give out their applications. Miss it, and you won’t be able to get an application to those schools for the year, so do your school research in the prior months (see point 2). And for that special Tuesday itself, we recommend starting at 9am and recruiting a trustworthy family member or friend to help you work the phones and computers, keeping in mind that the popular nursery schools may give out their applications by noon. “Staying organized and on top of those dates and deadlines is really critical,” explains Roxana Reid, educational consultant and founder of Smart City Kids. “Otherwise, you can be out of the process before you even get started.”

Special Tip: Find out beforehand whether a school distributes applications online or over the phone. Also, schools that nominally distribute applications throughout the fall may stop once they’ve given out the number they can handle—a good reason to reach out to them sooner rather than later.

2. Do Your Research Even before parents read about, talk about, or visit any schools, Gabriella Rowe, head of the Mandell School, recommends coming up with “Must Have,” “Would Be Great But Not Critical,” and “Who Cares?” lists to differentiate the qualities they’re looking for in their child’s education.

The lists may evolve, but they’re a good way to remember what’s truly important to you as you go through the process.

Once you commence your research, visit the website of every school you’re interested in. Consider buying Victoria Goldman’s The Manhattan Directory of Private Nursery Schools, which profiles over 150 preschools and offers parents advice and tips for narrowing their search. Likewise, the Parents League (parentsleague.org) offers a schools guide, personal consulting, and seminars. If you seek additional advisory services, organizations like Smart City Kids (smartcitykids.com) offer private sessions and small group workshops. It’s recommended that parents contact approximately ten schools to get eight applications. And you may want to widen your search a bit if you live in an area densely populated by families, such as the Upper East Side.

Special Tip: Make sure you apply to a range of schools, not just the most popular and sought-after schools in your neighborhood. Better to diversify and increase the odds of getting in somewhere.

3. Weigh Private And Public Tuitions at some NYC private nursery schools can range between $20,000 and $30,000 per year. For that reason, many families use public school Pre-K programs, which are free but only offered the year before kindergarten. Unlike with kindergarten, the city doesn’t guarantee you a spot in Pre-K. (Visit the Department of Education website, schools. nyc.gov, for more.) A number of children’s activity centers offer “preschool alternative” programs, which don’t have elaborate admissions, but offer similar activities.

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Special Tip: If money is an issue, the head of The Goddard School—a well-regarded national franchise that opened its first nursery school in NYC on the Upper West Side last year—Bill Swan advises looking for a quality school with a parent-friendly, flexible schedule. “Consider a half-day schedule for three days a week. This can result in a huge savings over full-day for five days, and your child is still receiving a curriculum-based program delivered by highly trained teachers,” he says.

4. Learn Educational Philosophies When considering nursery schools, factors like location, tuition, and general reputation are typical starting points.

But parents should also be very mindful of a school’s educational philosophy and how that plays out in the classroom. “If people stay focused on the goals and philosophy of the school and go with their gut as far as feeling comfortable in a particular setting, I believe they’ll end up at the right place,” says Sharon Shorofsky Mack, the Director of Education at the JCP Downtown.

Special Tip: The most popular pedagogies include Progressive, Montessori, Developmental, and Traditional— and Reggio Emilia has become more popular in recent years.

(A little time on Google is all you need for an overview of the philosophies; just keep in mind that many schools use modified versions or a mix of their favorite qualities of different approaches.)

5. Be Aware Of Age Requirements While the bulk of Manhattan’s programs begin at or around age three, a growing number of preschools have begun to offer classes for two-year-olds. In these cases, you’ll want to know whether a school is offering most of their spots for age two, because that can mean that there may be very few spots available in their three-year-olds classes.

Special Tip: Naturally, children are different in terms of how quickly they progress in their various aspects of development. While some may be ready for school at two, continued on page 56

New Nursery

Schools

• Avenues: The World School avenues.org • Ecole Internationale de New York einy.org • The Goddard School goddardschool.com (search Manhattan, Upper West Side) • The International Preschools ipsnyc.org (opening new division on the Upper East Side) • The Learning Experience thelearningexperience.com (search Manhattan) • Léman Prep lemanmanhattan.org • The Mandell School mandellschool.org (opening a new division near Lincoln Center) • Upper West Side Playgroup upperwestsideplaygroup.org • World Class Learning Academy wclacademy.org

www.newyorkfamily.com

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others may benefit from beginning with part-time sessions or simply waiting a year. Trust your instincts.

to apply for the afternoon class since morning classes are typically more popular.

6. Bond With The School Director Ask yourself: Is this someone whose opinion and instincts I trust? Since she is the leader of the school community, you may need to have a close and cooperative relationship with her, especially if any emotional or developmental challenges come to the fore, which is quite common in the nursery school years.

Special Tip: Families that are likely to apply to private school for kindergarten and beyond will be especially interested in a nursery school with a good track record for successfully guiding parents through the “ex-missions” process. Here, again, the school director may play a very important role in advising and supporting a family.

9. Write A First Choice Letter Because of the competition for limited spots, many parents feel compelled to send a “first choice letter” to their most desired school. This basically acknowledges that if a specific school were to select your child, you would accept the given slot. Other parents prefer to phrase the letter in less binding terms, noting particular reasons a certain school is a good match for them. While ISAAGNY (The Independent School Admission Association of Greater New York) officially discourages first choice letters, the truth is that many schools enjoy hearing positive feedback.

Special Tip: If you’re concerned that the school you favor may not appreciate a letter, we strongly encourage you to use the school tour to get clarification on whether they would prefer to hear from you near the end of the admissions season.

7. Attend Open Houses And Interviews Most nursery schools host tours and open houses, and many require interview sessions in addition to having your child (along with a parent or caregiver) participate in a group play date led by teachers from the school. During the play date, don’t panic if your child does something embarrassing or needs a diaper change. Educators understand that children are children. But remember that, on some level, parents are being evaluated as well, because school directors are looking for families who will be a positive part of the community. Therefore, as Wendy Levey, Director of Epiphany Community Nursery School, recommends, “From start to finish, treat the process with respect, care, and attention.”

Whether it’s the school tour, the interview, the play date, or merely a call to make sure your application was received, be polite, considerate, and engaging—which includes showing up on time, turning off your cell phone, and asking meaningful questions (not basic ones that you should know by looking at the school’s website).

In addition to making a good impression, any event at the school is an opportunity to get a better sense of it and get your questions answered. So take note of the classrooms and hallways, the teachers, and the students. Do they seem happy? Engaged? What’s the overall vibe? Likewise, what are certain aspects of the program that you’d like to understand better?

Special Tip: “Look for a well-developed curriculum,” advises Goddard’s Bill Swan. “Be encouraged by a school that gives you daily written feedback on your child’s activities, so you can build on them at home. Look for structure and an opportunity for varied educational experiences, including enrichment programs that unlock children’s imaginations and expand their world.”

8. Question Class Sizes And Times Parents care a lot about class size and student-teacher ratios (as they should), but keep in mind that licensed nursery schools have specific limits set by the Department of Health.

Special Tip: If you’re set on a certain school, it may help

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10. Use Recommendations Or Referrals Let’s put it this way: Do not send in an impersonal recommendation from a famous person who doesn’t really know your child and has nothing to do with the school.

However, if a good friend of yours is already a member of the school community, then a recommendation from her couldn’t hurt.

Special Tip: Some people assume that getting into nursery school is all about who you know. It’s just not true for the vast majority of people applying, so don’t put too much time into trying to identify a magic recommender.

11. Be Yourself It’s impossible to completely avoid the hype surrounding nursery school admissions in the city. But try not to be alarmed by stories of a dozen rejection letters; the wisdom and strategies we’ve distilled in this article should help a lot.

Epiphany’s Wendy Levey, like the other school directors and experts we spoke with, says, “Anyone who has done their homework and really gets their ducks in order usually ends up somewhere they are happy.” Most of all, focus on schools that feel like a truly good fit for your family and your child, and be sure to apply widely enough that it won’t come down to the decision of a few popular schools.

“The best way to ensure that your child has a preschool spot for September 2013 is to keep an open mind in picking the list of schools to which you will apply,” says Mandell’s Gabriella Rowe. “It should be varied and it should be comprehensive.”

For more information on schools and admissions in New York City, visit newyorkfamily.com, as well as the Blackboard Awards (blackboardawards.com), which honors excellence in local education.

www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 3:12 PM

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home&away

TRAVEL

Sprout Creek Farm

day trippers

Some Of Our Favorite Destinations For Family Day Trips B y M aggie M c N amara Sometimes, the best way to spend a weekend as a New Yorker is to get out of the city. Whether you’re interested in enjoying the great outdoors, taking in some culture, or simply kicking back and relaxing, there’s a day trip that’s perfect for you and your family. To get you started, we’ve compiled nearly 20 ideas for fast, easy, and unique trips that will transport your clan in more ways than one.

Delaware Water Gap Just 90 minutes from the city, the Delaware Water Gap is the perfect outdoor getaway for your family. It offers miles of beautiful river, valley, trails, and roadways, as well as scenic overlooks, waterfalls, historic villages, and a conservation park. Little adventurists will love camping at Worthington State Forest, which offers easy access to boating, fishing, and the Kittatinny Ridge and Appalachian Trail. nps.gov/dewa

Greenport Named one of the prettiest towns in America, Greenport houses a historic harbor. Take your family to the East End Seaport Museum, the 1840 School House Museum, the Blacksmith’s Shop, and the Railroad Museum of Long Island to learn about the area’s history. Or spend the day outside hiking, at the beach, or on a walking tour. Greenport’s motto is: “You don’t have to go far to get away.” greenportvillage.com

Splish Splash Long Island Water Park Prepare for 96 acres of fun at Splish Splash, with everything from tube slides to body slides, tame to extreme! The

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slides feature themes such as “Dinosaur Falls” and “Alien Invasion.” Kiddie slides and pools are available for the more cautious tots. splishsplashlongisland.com

Mystic Country Founded in 1654, Mystic Country continues to harbor classic New England charm. This seaport hosts famous museums Mystic Seaport and Mystic Aquarium. Olde Mistick Village features independent shops and restaurants, while the Essex Steam Train and Riverboat takes mini conductors on a relaxing ride complete with information about the Connecticut River Valley. mystic.org

Hyde Park Located in the heart of the Hudson Valley, Hyde Park offers campsites, cottages, and cabins for your family to explore the great outdoors in comfort. Take your clan hiking or rent a boat and fish for dinner. Free outdoor concerts, a drive-in theatre, and historical sites such as the Hyde Park Train Station Museum, Little Red Schoolhouse, and the home of Franklin D. Roosevelt are sure to keep everyone entertained. visithydeparkny.org

Six Flags Great Adventure With rides ranging in intensity from kiddie to family to big thrills, Six Flags Great Adventure is sure to please children and parents of all ages. Even if you grow tired of the coasters, you can stop by the drive-through safari—featuring animals such as giraffes, elephants, lions, and kangaroos—or, take a continued on page 62 www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 11:51 AM

the last word

A Tale Of Two Births A New Mom Reflects On Her Decision To Have Labor And Delivery At Home

By Angela Johnson Expecting my first child should have been one of the happiest times in my life. But instead of blissful prenatal yoga sessions, I spent more than half of my pregnancy on bed rest, due to an “incompetent cervix.” Our obstetrician warned me that I wouldn’t be able to carry my little girl to term, and I lived in fear that the slightest movement would have dangerous consequences for my baby.

After months of tests and confusing “doctor talk,” I underwent a painful labor induction at 37 weeks due to low amniotic fluid (probably because of all of my crying!). As if that weren’t enough, my parents and OB missed out on the whole thing.

When I learned that number two was on the way, I was terrified at the thought of another labor. The pain of my first pregnancy was still extremely raw. I didn’t want to relive that experience, but I had no idea how I could avoid it. Once an incompetent cervix, always an incompetent cervix, right?

After watching a documentary about home birth, my husband and I decided to consider it as an alternative to revisiting the hospital. This time, we wanted more control over our birth experience. He didn’t want to be confined to visiting hours and hospital policies. I wanted the freedom to eat, move around, and dress as I pleased. For us, home was the best place to make all of that happen.

As excited as we were, we had a hard time finding others who shared our enthusiasm. We reassured our parents that women have been having babies at home for centuries and that midwives were more than capable of handling emergencies. But there was a little part of me that was uneasy. Could the woman who can barely tolerate a paper cut handle natural childbirth?

It didn’t take long for us to find a pair of local midwives who instantly made us comfortable. Their cozy office walls were lined with photos of women and their beautiful, healthy babies—all born at home. The two women reviewed my medical records, gave me the green light to keep my routine, and encouraged me to allow my body to be in control of the pregnancy. I’d already proven I could carry a baby to term.

From then on, I looked forward to my monthly

appointments, which were more like therapy sessions than medical check-ups. I used the hour to vent about everything from piles of dirty laundry to painful hemorrhoids. The midwives even helped me find a pair of doulas who worked with me on natural pain management techniques.

With our team in place, there was nothing left for us to do but wait. After my due date came and went with little more than a flutter in my belly, my midwives monitored me closely but resolved to rely on my body to decide when the baby should be born.

“The baby will come on his birthday,” one of them joked. I tried every natural laborinducing tactic out there—spicy food, long walks, and acupuncture—but my little guy chose to stay inside and cook.

At the end of week 42, the big day finally arrived—with a little help from a castor oil and orange juice cocktail. We eagerly transformed our onebedroom apartment into a birthing center. We filled the pool, sliced fruit, brewed coffee, and cranked up the music.

As my midwives monitored the baby’s heart rate, my doula coached me through each contraction, encouraging me to move towards the pain rather than away from it. I was surprisingly calm, clutching the side of my birth pool and envisioning myself climbing a mountain. In true dramatic fashion, Baby Aiden made his debut moments later.

By the time my little guy had been cleaned and weighed, I was chowing down on a delicious homemade breakfast and a long-awaited cup of coffee. My daughter, who slept peacefully though most of the excitement, managed to tear herself away from Sesame Street long enough to meet her new baby brother.

I never imagined I’d give birth in my one-bedroom apartment on purpose, but I’m so proud of my family for having the courage to make Aiden’s birth what we wanted.

We now have two healthy children who are as unique as the conditions under which they came into the world.

“Could the woman who can barely tolerate a paper cut handle natural childbirth?”

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New York Family | August 2012

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After 10 years of working in the television industry, Angela Johnson is a freelance writer and stay-at-home mom.

She lives in Brooklyn with her husband and two children. www.newyorkfamily.com

7/23/12 11:19 AM

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7/13/12 2:30 PM

It’s Fall Y’all

Register Now For Fall 2012!

1520 York Avenue, New York, NY 10028 • 212.861.7732

For more information and a full list of classes for your child visit: www.gymtime.net.

@GymtimeNYC

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7/13/12 3:42 PM