Balancing the Scales Parenting and practising Barbara Relph* A balance between work and family is good for everyone but creating the mental and emotional energy to achieve this takes work and planning. For a barrister, reducing work hours is all very well but client needs must still be met, deadlines adhered to, and there must be no disruption to the service provided. The atypical work hours associated with running a practice can lead to stress or exhaustion, leaving the barrister unable to be emotionally involved in family life. And the dominoes keep falling with communication difficulties causing poorly defined or inequitable roles within the family leading to wider relationship problems. It’s hard to achieve a good balance between parenting and work – especially if the bank is your boss – but it is worthwhile. Mental health improves, burnout reduces, and satisfaction with personal relationships increase. With that in mind, there’s no doubt the most important – and the most difficult – thing you can do for your family is to pick the right person to have children with. If your partner sees you as an adjunct to their career it is significantly harder to succeed as a barrister. A quick chat with Kate Davenport QC highlighted some of the many challenges. Knowing the children’s needs are paramount, constant exhaustion is a given. Because law is not a career which complies with a regular work schedule, it is common for lawyer parents to come home to do their parenting job and then head for the home office, often working until late, simply because they have to.
SEPTEMBER 2021
Years of lobbying, mentoring and encouragement has made the legal profession in 2021 markedly more family friendly for both men and women, and most recent female bench or silk appointments are also mothers. We interviewed four barristers – all mid-juggle – to ask about the challenges and rewards of combining practising and parenting. Common themes which emerged were the importance of flexibility, a great home office setup, teamwork, and outside support. The various ways in which a good balance is achieved varies greatly between individuals, as we see here.
Every day is different – regularly check your solutions are fit for purpose Isabella Clarke and husband Sean have two young boys, aged almost seven and almost five. Sean is a GP working four days a week and Isabella practises from her home office as a member of Kate Sheppard Chambers, a virtual office environment for women. Isabella’s office has everything she needs (including a lock on the door to keep small people out). She is fully mobile, travelling to meet clients or even to the beach to have some quiet deep-thinking time. Acknowledging it doesn’t work for everyone, Isabella enjoys having no fixed boundaries between work and home. “It feels indulgent, but I seem to get more done in a day than I would in an office. I often work in the evening and go for a walk during the day. I’m completely self-directed about the order in which I do things.”
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