N – The Nexus Guide to First Year by Nexus Magazine

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Editorial What is Nexus? Get Amongst Surviving Halls Surviving Flats Campus Eats Outside of Campus King’s Cup Town Rundown Horoscopes Feature: Your First Time Waikato Students’ Union Puzzles

Nobody can guide you through university. You’re about to start something which could last anywhere from half a semester to 7 years; if all goes to plan, one day you’ll even graduate, eventually leaving campus with some sense of accomplishment, and a very expensive piece of paper. But more importantly, we hope that by the time you leave, you’ve completely fucked up countless times, made your worst mistakes, and formed your favourite memories. University is where you get your first dose of proper life experience, and hopefully burn a few couches along the way. Nothing will go to plan, but that’s the best part; all we can do to help is share our stories. Either learn from our mistakes or throw yourself headfirst down the same path, as long as you find some enjoyment from the following pages, we’ve done all we can. This may not have been the motivational pep talk you were looking for. But nevertheless, welcome to Waikato, may it be everything for you that it was for us. – LYAM BUCHANAN

Nexus: the voice of the Waikato student body - 100% locally grown content. For over 50 years, this publication has been capturing the vibe of the collective student psyche; dissecting and disseminating the current events, opinions and agendas of the time. Whether it was the opposition to the Vietnam war, the coverage of the Springbok Tour in Hamilton, or our celebration of the moment New Zealand went Nuclear Free, Nexus ensured student voices were heard. Student Editors and editorial teams make decisions not just on what is covered, but how it is covered; based largely on what they feel is important for you to know in the world. At the crux of it all, Nexus’ highest ambition is to provide daily or weekly content that you can read, watch, or view. And if we have done it half as well as we think we do, it should make you laugh, cry, and occasionally go “I never knew that,” or “that’s a different way of looking at it”. Nexus works on the basis that it belongs whole-heartedly to the student body - whether you are originally from the Tron or hail from a land further afield; this publication is dedicated to you. If you’re interested in contributing a few words, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz. You might start with a column or just a piece online, but eventually it could be your editorial voice defining what Nexus is for a whole different group of students. That’s the most exciting part of the whole adventure. We can tell you about where we’ve been in the past or what we’re doing in the present, but the future of Nexus will be entirely decided by you. 02

This year we’re moving beyond the printed page. What’s important for students is no longer limited to walls of text; Nexus now offers videos, podcasts, playlists, a full range of online content, and whatever other means of expression are produced throughout the year. We aim to remove limitations imposed on the student voice. You don’t need to ‘wait your turn’ to be a part of Nexus, we’re not some bullshit group of elitists. It doesn’t matter what you study, what your grades are, what year you’re in, what you’re into or who you are. We don’t want to come across as preachy, if you’re keen to get amongst either email editor@nexusmag. co.nz, flick us a DM on Instagram, message us on Facebook, or just pop into the SUB on campus. Writers: Both online and in print. We’re always looking for people to write news pieces, columns, feature articles, entertainment, reviews, etc. The greater the variety of voices, the more inclusive and engaging Nexus will be. Pitch us an idea, let us know what you’re keen to do. It’s simple, just email editor@ nexusmag.co.nz. Podcasts: Host your own show or get creative and define our sound. You could spin the tallest tales or make a stir with hard-hitting interviews. Perhaps recording and editing is more your scene? Either way, we’re keen to hear your ideas. Once again, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz to get involved. Video: Get in front of the camera, write a stellar script, or get technical behind the scenes. There’s room for actors, writers, film crews, editors, etc. Show us what you’re capable of, tell the tales of student life, be the one to go viral. As stated above, and a couple times above that, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz to get started. Editing/Subbing: Everyone makes mistakes its natral [sic]. Join the team getting down and dirty with proper nouns and run-on sentences. If you know the difference between ‘your’ and ‘you’re’, or at least can confidently use a semicolon, hit us up. As above, above that, above that, and a few times earlier, email editor@nexusmag.co.nz to express interest. Artists: Make us look pretty. We’re all about filling our pages up with a varied array of artwork. If you want a fuck-load of people to see your latest and greatest, email our designer and have a chat at design@nexusmag.co.nz. 03

Reinventing yourself:

University is the perfect opportunity to shed your highschool identity; there’s no need to be who you were known for back home. However painfully cliché, it’s still the truth. In theory, there’s no issue with this; you’ve spent years analysing traits you wish you had and now you’re given the chance to embrace them. In reality, it’ll take about a month of being in the halls before egos stop clashing, and any genuine relationships can form. Either way, it’s all part of the fun. I completely overdid my attempt at redefinition; I tried to remove myself from everything I enjoyed, then overcompensated for everything I should’ve done at sixteen. As long as your enrolment isn’t put under review the night before classes start, you’re doing just fine.

Contraception:

Hormones tend to get the better of you at the best of times, getting nude with your new buddy from the halls is no exception. Don’t stress post-undress, you luckily live on campus. Student Health Services and the Pharmacy have you sorted, whether it’s an ECP, pregnancy test, STI check, or just a bunch of free condoms. All your sexual health requirements are right on your doorstep.

RAs:

Despite what their egos lead them to believe, they’ll never be everyone’s best friend, let alone the coolest person in the room. However, this doesn’t mean you should constantly treat them like shit. They’re your first call when you need out of an awkward situation, so there’s no point in burning bridges. It’s a given that you’ll eventually get sick of them masturbating in the shower, stealing your snacks, or trying too hard to be youthful. Just remember that this is actually their job. It can’t be easy ensuring multiple freshers don’t fuck up their lives on a daily basis, cut them a bit of slack. 04

Substance:

At some point you’ll be offered drugs, most likely followed by “you’ve gotta try it at least once”. If you’re keen to experiment with drugs, that’s sweet. Just don’t be obnoxious about it. There’s a huge difference between pressuring someone to scull a drink and forcing someone to take a tab. If someone isn’t completely sold on the idea of drugs, they shouldn’t be taking any. If psychoactive substances are your idea of a hobby, just make sure you do it off campus, and that you do it right. If you’re taking tabs have someone tripsit, if you’re getting stoned organise a sober driver, if you’re popping caps buy some gum, and always tell someone you trust what you’re doing before you do it.

Screwing the crew:

‘Don’t screw the crew’ is the biggest load of bullshit. As long as you both go into it with the intention of keeping it meaningless, there’s nothing to lose. The truth is you’ll barely keep in contact with the majority of your fellow residents. After the halls, you’ll probably run into people fairly often - you might even stop for some polite chit chat - but I promise that by halfway through second year, you’ll be blatantly ignoring all but a few. My main regret from first year is not getting to know the crew a whole lot better. Lay out ground rules; it’s important to make sure neither of you will kick up a fuss when someone moves on to more exciting bits and pieces. Communication is key, define if you’re just connecting genitals, or if feelings are somewhere in the mix.

How to deal with landlords:

They’re the least empathetic, most pathetic excuses for people. During second year, my flatmates had their lives completely flipped; while two flatmates moved out to find work and help support their family, the other just shat the bed, dropped out and moved home. Funnily enough the landlord couldn’t have cared less about the situation, outright refusing to replace tenants because she was ‘unsure about the situation’, and would rather spend her time thinking about her upcoming travel plans. After a few months of barely scraping by each week, I wanted nothing more than to brick my landlords house. Thankfully instead of ending up in prison for a few months, I just popped into the WSU. I gave the full rundown to their Advocate, they considered joining me on my bricking escapades, but decided it’d be more satisfying to crush them in court. A date was set, the judicator implied my landlord go fuck herself, and my contract was ended. Life could’ve been a whole lot easier if I’d just contacted the Students’ Union earlier. If you ever have issues with your tenancy just hit them up, there’s no point in roughing it.

Balance:

If you’re keen to completely ruin yourself, there’s nothing stopping you, just remember you’ll be picking up your own pieces. These formative years are perfect for substance abuse and impromptu benders. Don’t overdo it, but definitely take advantage of your situation. Some people will end up regretting their choice to lock themselves away to ensure an A+ average, while others will regret barely remember their time at University. There’s no one-size-fits-all answer, so don’t take yourself too seriously and do what feels right at the time.

Finance:

The more money someone has, the trendier they think it is to be broke; everyone loves to complain about having no money until they’ve genuinely got nothing. Whatever budgeting advice your parents have given you is probably unrealistic. You’re not meant to have “spare money” as a student, you’re not meant to be able to save anything substantial. If you want some form of freedom and independence, it’s simple; just sacrifice your precious weekends and get a job. Otherwise, be prepared for a huge loan and get ready to be constantly asking your parents for handouts. Obviously being a stinge or having financial backing makes life easier, but enjoying yourself during a time where you’re meant to have nothing will give you a better sense of fulfillment. You’re at University, enjoy it. Once you finish this degree, you’ll look back and wish you’d taken better advantage of the situation.

Learn how to cook:

There’s nothing wrong with being too lazy to cook, shit happens. But having the skills to cook, and occasionally using them, will release a bunch of strain on your finances and general health. At this age, your body is pretty indestructible; I ate nothing but rice and tuna for 6 months so my nutritional advice isn’t the most credible, though after living on what was essentially cat food for half a year, I can safely say it feels a whole lot better to eat legitimate meals.

Bongo Sushi

Not only have they got the best sushi in Hamilton, the range of food available at Bongo is unrivalled. It’s no surprise that they’re constantly pumping throughout the day. Best of: • The sushi: you just can’t beat it. • Pies: easily the best on campus. Great range of flavours, solid price. The butter chicken pie is truly an emotional experience. • Donburi: for quantity and price, it really doesn’t get much better than this. You can’t go wrong with a teriyaki bowl.

Kahurangi

Situated by the Central Lake, this is easily the premium campus cafe. Not only do you get that much needed caffeine hit, but their staff can truly spin a yarn; the perfect spot to kill time or have a cheeky gossip. Best of: • Coffee: their brews are good year round. • Wraps: absolute lifesaver, words don’t do them justice. Do yourself a favour and give them a crack. • Hot Chocolate/Mocha: consider yourself a cocoa connoisseur? This is sure to please your palate.

Momento

This is the central point of the University’s hospitality and home to Hamilton’s most addictive curly fries. On top of this, it’s also the only spot on campus which sells alcohol outside of major events. Best of: • Curly fries: fairly self-explanatory. You’ll buy them at some point; you’ll also tell yourself to stop buying them at some point. • Alcohol: now you can have a pint between class and feel like a true rebel without a cause.

Sue’s Cafe

If there’s one person who’s too pure for this humble campus, it’s Sue. Shoot down here for a cupbop or a various pre-packed box, both of which are made with love and affection. Best of: • Cupbop: make it your way. Choose your favourite toppings, base and sauce. It’s cheap, filling, and tastes homemade. • Sue: she’s too good.

Pita Pit

It’s easy, efficient, and manages to avoid the hustle and bustle of midday on the Village Green. There’s really not a lot to say about it, it’s Pita Pit. If you’ve never been before, just go. It’s like Subway, except they don’t try to sell you all kinds of bullshit extras. Best of: • Falafel: feel satisfied without a bunch of meat. • It’s the easiest way to feel proper healthy while doing fuck-all.

Vending Machines

If you’re not too fond of human interaction, you’ll probably love these. They’re guaranteed to save your life on a late night in the library, but other than this they’re fairly standard. Best of: • Graphic Design studios: this lovely machine will occasionally bless those in dire need with an extra beverage. • Library Level 3: thank you for everything xx

You’ll hopefully be at Waikato for the next few years so you may as well explore your new city. Hamilton’s not that bad, we’ve got more than a few worthwhile spots. • Till’s Lookout: The perfect spot for a cute date, or just a deep and meaningful chat. The lights may not be as exciting as Auckland’s, but it’s still something. • Lake Rotoroa: Ideal track for a fairly scenic run, or just a morning coffee. Also a neat place to park up and get steamy in the backseat. • Duck Island: Top of the list for foodies. They’ve got a range of unique flavours, along with vegan and dairy free options. • Hammond Park: You might have to ask around for the exact location, but there’s a sweet cliff jump into the river here. Definitely be careful, it’s not the safest spot. • Victoria on the River: Hamilton’s newest, fanciest park. Have a look around the city then pop down here to enjoy the best of the river. • Needle in the Hay: A hidden gem in the central city. The best spot to find vinyls, nicknacks, and a variety of exciting artistic creations and supplies. • Grey Gardens: A lovely cafe tucked away down Lovegrove Lane, something a little different that’s definitely worth a visit. • Town and Country Food: A 24-hour bakery sure to satisfy the greasiest of cravings. It’s also not too far of a walk from town if you’re drunk and hungry. 11

A staple of binge culture. Everyone tends to argue about the rules so keep this handy; quit your bitching and focus on drinking. Set up: Chuck a large vessel in the middle of the table, spread a pack of cards in a circle around it, decide who picks a card first then continue clockwise. 2: Two for you – Pick a punter to drink twice. 3: Three for me – Hope you’re thirsty, drink three times bud. 4: Gals – All lovely ladies have a drink. 5: Never have I ever – Five fingers, take turns sharing things you’ve never done but you’re sure someone else has. Put a finger down each time you’ve done whatever is in question. First one out drinks. 6: Dicks – All handsome lads have a drink. 7: Thumbmaster – The thumbmaster can covertly put their thumb on the table at any point. Last of the group to follow suit, drinks. 8: Mate – Pick a mate, they now drink every time you do for the rest of the game.

9: Rhyme – Simple. Start out with a sentence, the last word is the rhyming word. First one to repeat an answer, or take too long, drinks. 10: Categories – ‘A ship came into the harbour carrying a load of..’ pick a category and go around the circle. First one to repeat an answer, or take too long, drinks. J: Rule – Make a rule (Talk with an accent/drink with your left hand/don’t use anyone’s name etc). Whoever breaks this rule must drink, the rule stays in play until the next Jack is drawn. Q: Question master – You’re now question master, if you ask a question and anyone responds with anything other than “fuck you question master”, they drink. K: Kings cup – Pour a substantial amount of your drink into the central vessel. Whoever pulls the fourth king ends the game by finishing the King’s cup. A: Waterfall – Start off a drinking waterfall, the person to the left can only stop drinking once you have, and so on and so forth. Joker: Your call. Either discard and pick up another, make everyone have a drink, or just decide your own meaning for it. Extra: Don’t break the circle. If the card you pick up makes a gap in the circle, finish your vessel. 13

House on Hood

Shenanigans

• Lives in a floral playsuit. • Tinder bio mentions wanting a sugar daddy. • Completely trashed after 4 Long Whites. • Drink of Choice: the Fishbowl mistaking the sugar rush for being tipsy.

• Too insecure with their masculinity to drink anything except beer. • Becomes genuinely aroused by ‘Wagon Wheel’. • Social smoker who doesn’t buy cigarettes, but is fine with asking for one of yours. • Drink of Choice: a jug of the cheapest beer available, except they split it with 7 others.

Wonder Horse

The Outback Inn

• Favourite topic of conversation is Marxism. • Can’t remember the last time their father hugged them. • Has fetish for divorce. • Drink of Choice: something expensive that contains whole eggs and coriander.

• Had a wank before town so they didn’t get a boner while dancing. • Exclusively shops at Northbeach • Sends at least 3 ‘hey, you up?’ texts each night. • Drink of Choice: the Jager Bomb, because a Vice article once said it’s like cocaine.

Bar101

The Back Bar

• Arrives at exactly 10 pm just to get a bunch of town photos. • Screams with excitement every time the next song starts. • Cries in the taxi home while telling the driver they “just don’t understand”. • Drink of Choice: shots! LOL haha how fuckin’ WILD.

• Spends 3 nights a week on the comedown. • Either already a tradie, or considers dropping out to be a tradie on the daily. • Sells their Ritalin prescription. • Drink of Choice: the Lime Cruiser, always snapchats themselves ‘sending it’ with a vortex.

Pisces (Feb 19-Mar 20) Murmurs echo through the Cosmos signalling a great disturbance ahead. Of course, it could just be the sound of your liver as it creeps toward combustion. You’re a first year student, so pace yourself. The fishbowls will taste just as sweet in September when you’re celebrating that C+.

Aries (Mar 21-Apr 19) Confidence, charm, a winning smile and great in bed. Mars and Venus are aligned and suggest these are the qualities that you… will eventually find in a best friend. Which is great for you because people like that always need a whiny, self-obsessed, neurotic navel gazer to constantly agree with them and provide rides at 2 am.

Taurus (Apr 20-May 20) Venus, the Goddess of love, is in your orbit this week. You will meet that special someone, the unconditional love of your life. At first, your eyes will meet across a foam pit. They smile and you feel that fluttering behind your eyes, then a tingling in your toes, then a slight numbing in your arm. There is a good chance this has fuck-all to do with love and everything to do with you having a stroke. You really should test those pills before you take them.

Gemini (May 21-June 20) Neptune is your spirit animal so if you are feeling low put two beroccas in a glass with vodka and Code Red Mountain Dew. Drink until you are ready to love yourself again. Pick three of the weirdest things in your wardrobe, put them on, add a headband and you have reinvented yourself as an enigmatic first year. It’s like being the foreign exchange kid at highschool. Own it, you fucking mystery, you.

Cancer (June 21-July 22) It’s fine to think you only stand outside with the smokers to chat and escape the heat. The truth is your mother probably chain-smoked through pregnancy, leaving you with an unconscious desire to taste the nicotine… but hey, as long as people think you are only doing it to be cool.

Leo (July 23-Aug 22) You should have been a Gemini. You are all things to all people. You’re a genius, but indecisive. You’re funny but shy. You’re driven but not egotistical. In short, you are going to be anything you want… except if you are a Faculty of Arts student. Then, you will probably just drop out and work at Duck Island.

Virgo (Aug 23-Sep 22) You’re a happy accident, the result of raw passion. It’s a shame this never translated to love and affection throughout your childhood. It’s also a shame that your birth destroyed the love that your parents once shared. At least you’ve made it to university though, maybe now that you’ve left home, they’ll learn to love again.

Libra (Sep 23-Oct 22) A storm brews upon the Great Eastern ridge of Venus, so it’s the perfect time to make a desperate cry for attention. Use this opportunity to make a private Instagram account. For the best results, use a cryptic, yet witty bio to seem extra mysterious. Maybe then that person in the third row of L.G.01 will notice you.

Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21) With Pluto in your orbit, you’ve been left devoid of social cues. You’ll struggle to form connections with your peers, quickly becoming forgotten by those you regard as friends. We advise joining a political club on campus. If you suffer from a crippling superiority complex, then we suggest the Young Nats, though if you’re painfully positive and hyperactive then the Greens are definitely more for you.

Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21) With a fresh start comes a range of opportunities. Push past your comfort zone, experience something new, or just apologise to your parents for being an angsty shitbag throughout high school, either or.

Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19) The alignment of Venus leaves you frantic, struggling to find your new identity. You may not be sexually confident enough for a Contiki, though you’re definitely capable to developing a range of socially limiting traits. Flexitarianism and being aggressively conscious about the environment are still trendy, just don’t forget to start a blog.

Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18) Remember how people always used to tell you that you’re talented, unique, special and that one day you will change the world? We consulted Jupiter and it isn’t telling us any of that shit. It’s actually telling us you’re unlikely to amount to anything so get used to being referred to as “that one in my tutorial, I don’t know their name…. with the hat”.

Uni is a time of many firsts, and it can be confusing to figure your way around as you get settled in. Allow us to give some advice on how to deal with all new experiences – both the rad and the sad – to make uni life-changing (in a good way). Your first week in the halls:

So, you’ve moved into the halls; the place you’ll be living for the next eight months. Are you wondering what things you need to know and remember about this precious place? Follow these genius tips to have a totally tubular first week in the halls before classes kick in. 1. Actually talk to people – this is the greatest time of our lives! Put yourself out there and talk to some new people. We guarantee that no matter how weird you think you come across, there will ALWAYS be someone you click with. 2. Speaking of clicking, there will also ALWAYS be someone you won’t click with, and that’s okay. Don’t let it get to you; there’s always going to be assholes who you don’t get on with, but focus on your groovy new friends and live, laugh, love. 3. And yes, we are well aware of the rivalry between halls. But don’t let that stop you from making friends with people in other halls! Student Village and Bryant Hall are right beside each other, so you’re going to have to live in harmony... hopefully. 4. Learn to love the halls food. Yes, it may seem terrible at first – and there may be nothing you want more than your mum’s spaghetti – but you’re stuck with it for the next eight months. Unless you want to blow all your money on buying Maccas and pizza every day then we say suck it up, buttercup. 5. Make your room your own. That’s what it is, YOURS. Put up pictures, posters, lights, knick-knacks, the whole shebang. Do what you gotta do to make it feel a little less like a jail cell. 6. Get comfortable; don’t be afraid to be yourself. But just keep in mind, even though you may want to listen to your heavy metal on full blast at 4am, your neighbours may be a little hesitant. From past experience, the people that do this don’t last very long in the good books. 7. One of the more interesting parts of hall life is definitely the shared bathrooms. The smells, the constant mess everywhere, and even the suspicious shower floors. All we can say is make sure you take everything you want to remain uncontaminated back to your room, and maybe wear 21

jandals – you never know what’s been on those floors. Talk to your parents. You may be having the time of your life, never thinking of home, but your parents will be missing you. Make sure you stay in touch, even if it’s just a text every now and then. It’s not fair just to hit up the rents when you need access to their bank, or someone to vent to once you’ve left all your assignments to the last minute. 9. Take advantage of your freedom! You’ve moved out of home and are on your way to becoming an (somewhat) independent, functional adult. So don’t keep that string tied to home too tight, otherwise you might miss out on fun going on within your hall. 10. A final tip – be nice to your housekeepers, please! They are a blessing in disguise, one which you may not realise until you’re faced with the task of flatting and have to actually clean up after yourself. 8.

Your first O-Week

It’s the greatest time of semester when everyone begins bonding while getting absolutely rinsed together in wacky costumes for town dress-ups. O-Week’s a super intense time, so allow us to give you some (hopefully) helpful hints on how to navigate the week and make it out alive at the end of it. 1. Pace yourself – one of the first things I remember my RA telling me was that O-Week is a marathon, not a sprint. Take it easy. While it’s great to have fun, it’s never cool to crash and burn on the first night; for you or your new friends looking after you. Plus, it’s always neat to actually remember your O-Week. 2. When going out make sure to go in the biggest group possible. If you’re in the halls, getting absolutely pissed with your neighbours is the best way to get to know each other. Holding back someone’s hair when they’re throwing up on Hood Street really creates a special bond that will last for the rest of the year. 3. Look after each other – if you’ve moved to the Tron for uni, there’s a chance you might not be familiar with our lovely Victoria Street. Look out for your mates and stick close to a few, make sure that everyone’s safe while having a gnarly time. 4. BAR101; a classic staple upon turning 18 and going into town for the first time. But our advice for you is to keep your options open, don’t worry, there are many other bars in town – a personal choice being Static, because a small room filled with sweaty people and hardcore EDM ensures a night well spent. 5. Funds – O-Week is one of the few times that most people seem to have cash to burn. While you might feel rich, it won’t last long. To avoid spending all

your dollas on buying Hamilton’s cheap shots, try taking cash instead of your card so you know that you’ve got limited money. Or, ya know, take the card and spend up large. Either or. 6. Whilst on the topic of funds, to ensure you won’t be forking out big bucks on drinks all night long we suggest you hit Billy’s,The Karaoke Bar. If you simply close your eyes when going into the bathroom and focus only on the $3.50 shots, it’s not that bad. 7. Believe it or not, O-Week is not only about getting absolutely smashed every night, but is also actually an orientation into the university itself. So, we recommend rather than sleeping off that hangover, take a walk around the campus. Familiarise yourself with the buildings, because when classes start, there’s nothing worse than trying to find a classroom in the teaching buildings, believe me. 8. Another tip when walking around campus – always take the free shit they give out. Sure, having a bunch of pens may seem useless right now, but in a few weeks after having not done a stationary trip to the Warehouse like you said you would, they will come in very handy. Knowing from experience, take the goddamn pens. 9. Now, back on the topic of drinking yourself into an early grave, food after town is an essential. A top pick for us being Refueljo’s. With an AUX cord and chargers on deck to assist you whilst downing a healthy portion of Cheesy Weezy’s, this place is located just down the road from the biggest clubs in Hamilton, and is therefore the perfect end to a night out. 10. And for the final tip to survive your first O-Week at the beautiful University of Waikato; make sure you’re ready for classes because once the fun ends, torture ensues.

Your first flat party

Yes, yes, what you have all been waiting for: University Flat parties. Hosted by the cooler second years, there’s an array of entertainment for the poor freshers that get kicked out of the halls at 10pm. Upon our experience attending flat parties as freshers, we came across a lot of interesting characters, alcohol fuelled stupidity, and (not at all) well-kept homes. So, with all the knowledge we have mustered over the year, here’s a few tips to ensure the greatest (but safest of course) experience. 1. Despite every person telling you funnel entry is mandatory upon entering the party, don’t worry – if that’s not your jam don’t do it. The only thing you’ll face due to denial of this ritual is a smaller chance of a hangover, so who’s the real winner? 23

But also, being the first fresher to sink a funnel can be a big boost to your developing reputation. So, if that’s your deal all I recommend is make sure the equipment is legit, and not a vacuum cleaner tube. Take it from me, this is some advice you should really take on board. 3. If you can avoid it, don’t use the bathroom. There’s usually no toilet paper and god knows what’s on that hand towel. But ya know, when you gotta go, you gotta go – must be great to be a guy… 4. Take a jacket. Hamilton’s bloody cold, especially when that alcohol blanket wears off. 5. We all know the struggle of low funds. So if you’ve gone all out on anything more expensive than your classic scrumpy or vile bottle of wine, then keep it with you. The minute you put that box down, you’ll never see it again. As I said, uni is expensive and good alcohol is hard to come by, so give us a break will ya. 6. We know most of you aren’t innocent; lots of you will have attended high school parties. The famous Hogan Street parties are pretty similar with regards to teenagers making stupid decisions, but the difference is we get a slightly cooler title of a ‘uni party.’ 7. Also, there’s no mothers ringing at midnight ordering you to come home. Instead the wonders of Outback and BAR101 call your name. 8. Pace yourself, don’t go too hard at the pres. There’s nothing worse than making the effort to get into town, and then not being let in by the bouncer because you’re too pissed. Even worse, you’ll miss that super rad DJ set at BAR101! 9. Make friends. Flat parties are the best place to meet people outside of your hall and in higher years at uni whom may shed insight onto your first year. Take their advice (and ours of course); we’ve all been there. 10. Lastly, have a rad time! Some of our funniest memories of the first year were had at the infamous flat parties. With the right crowd, good music and sweet alcohol, you’ll have the best times and hopefully actually remember them.

Your first week of classes

O-Week has finished and you’re out of your alcohol-induced coma. Now the real fun starts; classes. You know, what you’re actually at University for? Here’s a compilation of advice and tips we wish we had been given upon our venture into first year university classes. 1. Spoiler: It’s gonna suck. The teachers didn’t lie, it is harder than high school. 2. What you need for class is the question on all of your minds, I know. Whether you’re a management, computer science or arts student, you will

need to take notes at some point in the semester (maybe). So either a laptop which guarantees distractions, or the classic paper and pen, are mandatory. Either way, pick one and stick to it -– when it comes to exams you’ll want all your shit in one place. 3. Textbooks, do you really need them? Depending on the class, there are ways to avoid spending a couple hundred bucks on textbooks you’ll never read. So don’t be afraid to buy second-hand books; there’s even a Facebook group dedicated to it. Cheaper textbooks = more money for alcohol, right? 4. As mentioned before, familiarise yourself with the campus before attending class. We cannot emphasize enough how confusing some of the blocks are and how long it takes to find certain classes. Those fucking teaching buildings man. 5. Making friends, or simply talking to people in your lectures, is actually a really good idea. You may think just keeping to yourself and getting the work done alone is ideal. But once that big test rolls around and you have no one to copy notes off from those lectures you missed, it really helps to have those random Facebook friends. 6. Making a good impression on your tutors is key. They could make the difference between not asking for advice and failing the paper, or becoming comfortable enough to seek help and getting at least a C-. 7. Remember, lecturers are employed because of their intelligence and knowledge, not their teaching abilities. Just keep that in mind. 8. Don’t be that dick that walks in 20 minutes late – it’s not that hard to be on time kids. 9. Panopto is our great saviour. Just check that the class is actually recorded before skipping. If it is recorded, make sure to actually watch the class later on. Telling yourself you’ll catch up later and never doing it can become a never-ending cycle of disappointment, similar to the look in your parent’s eyes if you fail a course. 10. Lastly, actually go to the first week of classes. It might suck but it’ll let you know if you hate the class, and it’s better to switch sooner rather than later. It might lessen the desire to drop out if you sort of like your classes.

Your first assignment

Believe it or not, getting a degree in University actually requires some work. Sure, you could scrape by on the bare minimum, but at least a few assignments do need to be completed. So here we have tips and advice to ensure you (hopefully) complete those pesky assignments to the best of your ability. 1. Do not leave it to the last minute. You might think you can bullshit your way 25

through like you did in English class, but these lecturers know their shit, and first year uni students that are only running on caffeine and being too tired to sleep can’t really compete. Also, submitting an assignment with 14 seconds left really gets the heart pumping – and not in a good way. 2. Know the deductions for being late. If it’s 5% for every 24 hours, then use the 24 hours to actually finish the assignment and make it presentable, rather than rushing in the last hour to get it in on time. Chances are, using the extra time could bump your work up enough that the deductions don’t matter in the long run. Go big or go home! 3. Do your referencing as you go. We truly cannot emphasise this enough. While it might seem like a good idea to just write and then prove it later, it really fucks you over when you’re so original that no one else agrees with you. 4. Ask for help if you need it. Your tutors are there for a reason. Don’t contribute to the capitalist regime that is society; make them work for their money, kids. 5. Actually do your assignments. No matter what grade you get it all adds up at the end of the day, and whether you do shit or not, you could still scrape by with a pass. C’s get degrees, amiright?! 6. Do your research. It might suck, but it’ll suck more when your lecturer asks you why you tried to pass a baby boomer’s comment on a NZ Herald article off as an academic source. Worse yet, you become one of their infamous stories of what not to do in their course, told to students for years to come. Legend. 7. Use your friends! You know how we told you to talk to people in class? This is where it comes in handy. Work together and check each other’s work to make sure you’re on the right track. This way, if one of you goes down, you’re taking the other one with you. Win win. 8. Acquiring the correct equipment to actually complete an upcoming assignment is also a must. Relying on the computers in the library may not be ideal, as a 4th year engineering student writing a 10-page report probably has priority over your 500-word essay on Avatar. 9. Know where to hand it in. Depending on the department or the class there are many different places where assignments are handed in. Whether it be physically pushed into a slot or online, find out before your due date which inevitably will arrive. 10. If a paper copy has to be handed in, write your damn name! Honestly, imagine making it to uni and then being that guy who doesn’t name their work. Sucks to be you, dude.

The Waikato Students’ Union is the heart of life on campus. We are the people who give you free sausages on the Green, host events throughout O’Week, support you when you need help budgeting, or when things just haven’t gone your way. We are the people who work to ensure your voices are heard at every level, from class reps to campus committees. WSU is governed by our Board of Directors and run by professional staff. The Board is student-elected and student-run, allowing for you to choose who makes the decisions about your University life. Our professional support team consists almost entirely of recent graduates and Nexus writers, providing you with a range of advocacy services alongside a weekly student publication. Candra Pullon is your WSU President for 2018, she’s here to develop a new vision for our campus; a vision that will create better student spaces, better facilities, and cater for all needs. She’s up to ensure students have their say, along with strengthening the relationship with the University to provide more funding for events, redevelopment and hopefully a student bar. Representation is our highest priority; but to provide the best experience for you, we need to know what you actually want. To do this, we hold regular consultations with students which act as our official forums for student feedback. We’ve also got a range of more casual forums such as various Facebook groups, and the option to pop into the Student Union Building (SUB) and have a chat in-person. Our role is to make sure you enjoy your time here. All you’ve gotta do is get involved, take advantage and let your voice be heard. 27

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Here are a few examples of our current projects: Discussions on the Campus environment, including the use of spaces and planned developments (student bar). Providing more affordable food options on campus, along with establishing a University wellness week. Improving Student Engagement, bringing better spaces and events to campus; making it more than somewhere you just go for class. Development of our website www.wsu.org.nz, including a full integration of our clubs and societies which are a huge part of the wider WSU community.

Student Support

There’s a high chance that at some point in your Uni career, you’ll either screw up, or be screwed over. Lucky for you, the Advocates at the Waikato Students’ Union have the expertise and services to save you from academic, financial, and legal hardship. Our student support team is sworn to the highest degree of confidentiality. There’s no judgement towards clients; advocates are here to listen to you, and provide the support they believe you need.

Academic Disputes and Special Consideration

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University isn’t always a breeze; let us help out. Has a circumstance beyond your control seriously impaired your examination preparation or performance? Just chill, come have a chat and we’ll go through the application process for special consideration. Recently been accused of some academic misconduct? No stress, our advocates will help you prepare for disciplinary hearings and can even join you as a Support Person. Having trouble re-enrolling after failing a few too many papers? Shit happens, we’ll sit down with you and go through the reapplication process for your Faculty.

Tenancy and Financial Hardship

If you thought living with your parents was hard, dealing with Landlords might not be for you. The majority of the time your Property Manager/Landlord couldn’t care less about you. —— If you’ve got concerns about the legality of their actions, let us know – we’ll help you go through these queries and inform you on what actions to take. —— If your living situation really starts to fall apart, you may find yourself involved with a tenancy tribunal. Fear not; we can contact your Landlord 28

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privately to discuss alternative solutions, and provide a Support Person if you do end up heading to a tribunal. Juggling finances on top of a stressful workload can be a struggle at the best of times. We’re here to help. We can provide financial support through food parcels, vouchers and even interest-free loans depending on your circumstance.

Studylink/ WINZ and Legal Advice ——

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Applications may be tedious but they don’t need to be stressful. Keeping on top of the Government’s helping hand is fairly important. If you’re having trouble with application forms, just let us know; we can go through the nitty gritty with you and make phone calls on your behalf if needed. Looking for legal advice? Every second Thursday, we run a free legal clinic over in the WSU building. This allows for every client with a valid appointment to pop in for free advice from a genuine lawyer.

We’re here to help. As a Waikato University student, you’re eligible for any of the services listed above. You can reach us for an appointment via: —— Calling 07 837 9450 and asking for an appointment with one of our advocates —— Coming into the SUB and booking an appointment with our receptionist —— Completing an appointment form on www.wsu.org.nz —— Sending an email to support@wsu.org.nz

Puzzles

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CODE CRACKER 20

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A B C D E F G H I J KL M N O P Q R STUVWXYZ 1

ACROSS:

1. Tune (6) 4. Shriek (6) 9. Elaborate ceremony (7) 10. Youngster (5) 11. Plaudit (5) 12. Dried grapes (7) 13. Comfort (6) 15. Slapstick (6) 18. Lamp (7) 20. Legally acceptable (5) 23. Happening (5) 24. Coach (7) 25. Tallies (6) 26. Tiers (6) DOWN:

1. Tree (5) 2. Licit (5) 3. Extreme (7) 5. Desert plants (5) 6. Building (7) 7. Freedom from vanity or conceit (7) 8. Rear part of a ship (5) 13. Prominent (7) 14. Soft or indulgent (7) 16. Avert (7) 17. Combine (5) 19. Laud (5) 21. Spear (5) 22. Sews (5)

CROSSWORD 1

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WORD TWIST

Here are a few tips from the Waikato District Police on how to stay safe during O Week and throughout the year: DO:

• Let someone know where you are going – it’s easy to get lost in town. • Eat something substantial before you start drinking alcohol. • Arrange a place to meet with friends if you are separated. • Have a glass of water in between alcoholic drinks. • Plan how you’re getting home before a night out. • Make use of the safe zone during O Week. • Fully charge your phone prior to going out. • Report anything suspicious to police. • Remember to lock away valuables. • Call 111 if you urgently need help.

Waikato Police

waikatodistrictpolice

DON’T:

• Leave friends alone if they are sick, uncoordinated, or faint. • Drink alcohol or carry open vessels in liquor ban areas. • Leave your house unlocked when going to town. • Accept drinks from strangers. • Wander away from friends. • Leave drinks unattended.

@WaikatoPolice

For more information, visit www.police.govt.nz/advice

waikatopolice

Important things to know: • Hamilton city has a 24/7 alcohol ban in the central city area. There is also a Hamilton-wide alcohol ban in all other public places between 10pm and 6am. • Police have the power to search, seize or arrest if they suspect someone is breaching this bylaw. They may also issue an infringement notice of $250 for a breach of this ban.

Sexual assault • Sexual assault is any unwanted or forced sex act or behaviour that has happened without a person’s consent. A person consents to sexual activity if they do it actively, freely, voluntarily and consciously without being pressured.

Where to get help: • New Zealand Police – there are police officers specially trained to work with sexual assault situations. • Anglesea Clinic 24/7 Accident and Emergency Centre – staff are used to dealing with all types of physical assault. This centre is also the forensic medical examination centre for victims of sexual assault. • Rape and Sexual Abuse Healing Centre – 027 278 5331 • The Alcohol Drug Helpline – 0800 787 797 • Sexual Assault Assessment – Treatment Services 07 858 0800

If you suspect an alcohol or drug-assisted sexual assault: • Don’t shower or wash – this will help preserve any evidence • Contact police and go to Anglesea Clinic 24/7 Accident and Emergency Centre. • Take a urine test within 24 hours, as this could prove you were drugged. • Normal reactions to a sexual assault include fear, shame, anger, frustration, panic, guilt, despair and embarrassment. • Remember you are not to blame – the perpetrator is always 100 percent responsible. Rape and sexual assault are crimes.

/NexusNZ @nexusmag @nexusmag nexusmag /nexusmag