Nexus 2023 Issue 16

IT’S

It’s a new day, a deep breath, a sweaty face, a bootcamp, a catch-up, a challenge, a realisation, a conversation, a push and a pull, a moment of peace, a struggle and a win, a feeling, a superpower, a soundtrack and a stage, a weight plate, a new limit, a grind, a flex, a heavy set, a commitment, a culture, a community, a way of life, a second home, a place to discover your playground.

The Blues Awards are a celebration of excellence.

If you or someone you know has achieved at regional, national or international level in sport or the creative and performing arts, submit a Blues Award nomination!

Nomination forms and information available at waikato.ac.nz/events/blues

WE’VE GOT A WIDE RANGE OF ROLES TO SUIT ALL LIFESTYLES.

Politics are tryna fuck u

Thank you for your Sexual Consideration

Sex is difficult, so is talking about your preference

Music + Sex

Why it matters. 'Cos it matters, right?

Erotica Comp

The long awaited comp, and stories about you all having the sex

Your guide to Consent

It's not that hard but we made it SO much easier for you.

Reviews

Pretty usual one. So like, you should no what we're doing by now.

Fun Section

All the things you want. Puzzles, Horoscopes, Low Five oh my.

Are you Sexually Literate?

It's quiz time baby

14 28

Your guide to clapping cheeks

We made it hella simple for you

Issue Sexteen

31st July 2023

Disclaimers

Nexus is a magazine made by students, for students. As such it’s sometimes controversial views don’t actually represent those of the Nexus Editor, the writers, or the sponsors.

Location

The Nexus office is located down the hall at the WSU, usually with Alexa playing sick cunt beats thanks to Jak

Social Links

Printing

The Forest Stewardship Council® (FSC®) is an independent, not for profit, non-government organization established to support environmentally appropriate, socially beneficial, and economically viable management of the world’s forests. FSC® vision is where the world’s forests meet the social, ecological, and economic rights and needs of the present generation without compromising those of future generations.

Sex positon based on Major

Do you need an explaination?

16 30

Rugby, it's kinda... ya

know

We have a story about Rugby boys and hooking up. In that order

Editor-in-Chief + Design

Jak Rāta editor@nexusmag.co.nz

Deputy Editors

Tehana De Klerk tehana@nexusmag.co.nz

Seamus Lohrey seamus@nexusmag.co.nz

Te Ao Māori

Kae’sharn Hose kaesharn@nexusmag.co.nz

Tatiana Warren tatiana@nexusmag.co.nz

Staff Writers

Joel Collins

Leilani Summer

Yashanshi Kala

Illustration

Filly Arias Marin filly@nexusmag.co.nz

Media Team

Kat Whitaker kat@nexusmag.co.nz

Jasmine Gorman jasmine@nexusmag.co.nz

Cover + Centrefold

Filly + Jasmine

Contributors

Haast Hunter

I'm sure you've all been keeping tabs on the nonsense being spewed out in politics at the moment. Right? Oh, just me? You mean to say I care about things that I shouldn't? That would be a first.

What I mean is that from both sides, there's a bunch of nonsense being spewed about how the opposition isn't worth their weight in cost-adjusted cheese. You've got National opposing co-governance and utilising one of our NATIONAL languages on street signs – stating it's a waste of money, but they were due for a reset anyway? Then Labour is out here denying that there's a climate crisis and not mentioning that we're literally all about to die. Not to get overly cynical, because I'm the resident optimist, but is anyone else just feeling a little tired? Perhaps tired isn't a good word, but I'm kind of sick of being the bigger person when blatant racism is being thrown in my face or classism reigns supreme.

It will cost you nothing to be a good person, but it will cost you everything to be c*nt. The decision is yours, and you can make it without my crap opinion there to motivate you. Make those choices for yourself and never let me, some magazine

kid, change your mindset.

So, wanna talk about fucking? I'm sorry, would you like to discuss sex? There are numerous pieces throughout this magazine, with sex stories and the best places to be intimate – we've got it all. Sex shouldn't, and isn't at Nexus, a taboo topic. It's chill. I don't want to hear all about your journey into the realm of sex, but you shouldn't be afraid to ask for guidance and advice when it's needed.

We didn't want it to be a serious talk about sex, but a funny laugh. There are a couple of personal tales and a whole lot of interesting discussions. But, I will say now, everything this week is anonymous, and all the pieces were up to the author as to whether they actually wanted to share what they'd written. Ya feel?

Sex. It's something most do, and it's something that heaps enjoy. Take a look at the mag and let me know what you think. Or don't. I'm easy. Not easy. But...

You know what I mean.

– Jak

Couple of Kids

Your easy pickins’ pimpsqueak. This is a great place to start. If you have already decided you are voting New Zealand First, you just love Winny Peters. Fair, but not fair enough to have committed a tick or two to this right wing (or left, who knows after 2017) party. Now, as an undecided voter myself, this isn’t coming from political bias. I’m saying all this because they haven’t actually got policy for the upcoming election as of writing

ACT

Tough on crime, not on inequality.

It’s interesting that David Seymour, an educated man, still sees equality in its formal definition. That is rather than an approach like substantive equality, which looks to give people what they need. You’re not going to give everyone glasses, only the people that need them to see. This along with what is most simply described as pedestal politics creates an interesting mix. It seems to be a

this. Policy being the entire thing political parties are meant to cling to. It’s their reason for running; their reason for existing!

It's all well and good launching your campaign at the holy ground of Mount Smart but if all you have regarding policy is “we are going to ensure that the tax income brackets are adjusted to inflation" then what's the point of even starting. That commitment has no

further explanation on how they will do that. Winston says we have to wait a couple of months for that. Unfortunately, good economic policy isn’t just saying “inflation is bad”. On top of this, their policy page is currently still possessing their 2020 policies. Since we all vote for parties based on their policy and not the personalities of their members (right? RIGHT?), why are NZ First even showing already committed voters.

favoured position by Act to treat those that are worse off in our society as those that are below in our society; these two things are not the same. The latter is never right. Why tougher punishments without trying to effectively treat the root of the problem? Why keep 17 year olds from voting but insist they be charged as adults. Pedestal politics - keep those we see as below us just that way.

NZ First

Kupu Whakaatu Feature

Mational

You're an interesting man, Christopher. I don't understand how you were the CEO of Air New Zealand but your economic policy is often stated as ‘growing the economy’. Now, I know, unlike Winston Peters, these policies have more substance to them. I find it interesting, however, that despite how simple you seem to find our economic issues, there was a $4 billion issue with your original economic plan. I think you're a better leader than your procedures so kudos.

Labour Green

Can you guys show more intensity? I’m not talking about dropping a diss track on your right wing counterparts, but rather using your 63 MPs (!!!!) to give definitive solutions to issues.

There's a lack of cohesion which is showing with the internal issues in caucus in and cabinet. Crime is out of hand and there seems to be inaction.

Green - Stop being a support beam and start being the actual ceiling (deep, I know). Your role in this election is not to help labour be the big cheese but to be a prime chef and stir the pot. Challenge current climate action. Push your

Te Pati MAaori

What works for Māori will not work for all (in most cases). You guys are unapologetically Māori and that is the role that is needed in Māori. Minor parties need to call up the big dogs every chance that is right. But this narrative that what works for Māori will work for all is dangerous

approaches to crime more effectively. You have 9 MPs, yet 6 are hardly heard of. I know it was harder with the current Labour Government taking up the majority, but it changes this election. Do an Act and hold some more independence.

at repeating history. What worked for Pākehā did not work for all after the signing of the treaty - it led to the systematic racism that led to us needing you guys today. By Māori, for Māori means that we need a Māori approach to Māori issues. That will solve it.

I’m straight, but whenever Paddy Carrigan or Jordan Riki grace my TikTok fyp, I can’t help but feel my heart flutter aggressively. So all I can do is just pretend that I’m not secretly liking them–storing them in a favourites folder labelled ‘rugby tings’. Now before I see you all up in arms about me being ‘straight’ and liking the look of a good man, it’s 2023, and I can compliment a good looking bloke without feeling my masculinity diminish at the very thought. But how about we chat on the homophobia and rampant double standard of the game – or even just about the culture surrounding it.

The year this story takes place isn’t relevant, nor is the team that is the central focus of the tale. But let me start by saying I’ve played rugby my whole life. I live and breathe the game with a constant stream of some match-up playing close-by. It’s something that most young boys get pushed into at a young age in NZ. There’s T.V shows, games and even cereal to make it known that rugby is our backbone and bloodstream.

When I say that you hear every insult under the sun in those changing rooms, I mean you could write a dissertation on it. There were phrases and terms thrown around that I’d never even heard of. So it’s hard to discern between the common phrases and ones that actually hit different. Of the cunts in there, Josh and Reid (fake names) were some of the more imaginative. Well they thought they were original – throwing around shit like f*g and gay cunt at all the poor year 9’s. Relentless in their delivery, the main target being a queer boy that seemed to take the insults on the chin. Grin and bear it was the energy of the kid. Had to admire his confidence, but it all seemed to be fine.

I won’t go into the specifics of how that came to an end, but he wasn’t actually as great at taking those insults as we all thought. While I believe he’s doing better now, it was obviously a shock that he would attempt to take… anyway (not diminishing but the main point of this story is coming up)

There’s a major part of me that wishes that this changed Josh and Reid for the better but their insults became sharp and more vicious with every quip. Blaming the poor kid for his solution, claiming it to be weak and poorly timed. Times were changing in social media, people were becoming more fiercely aware of what they could do. What was important in our actions against what we think and know to be wrong. Guys fought back, shutting down their remarks.

That was until a couple of guys walked in on them giving each other head. It’s an aggressive climax in the story, I know, but it’s the main point. They were projecting, their insecurities were ammunition against those freely expressing what the boys wish they could be. Now they weren’t the only ones expressing their hatred towards the LGBT community but pack mentality can and will always be a rough attack line against the defenceless.

Rugby is everything, but it can also be one of the most toxic environments in the world. Die hard rugger boys will be reading and trying to say that it was just those two boys and not everyone is like that. Clearly I didn’t mention that both boys were bullied out of the team for being gay. Or was it karma? I hope for you youngins that life is different in the changing rooms these days – because it’s part of the reason I wouldn’t go back.

This tale has had some details changed so not to identify any of the people involved in it. Please note that it's more of a kōrero about what's important in sports - being open to talk about sexuality and homophobia

Kupu Whakaatu Feature

What a bummer Chipped Tooth Girlie

My first time having anal sex… in a bathroom. It went about as well as you think it would. Now I don't want any of you getting confused that my first time having anal sex was in a bathroom, but rather my first time having anal sex in any bathroom wasn't that successful.

It was the first year of university, and I was dating a long-term boyfriend from High School. We were very much "in love," but neither of us really knew where to go from there. We had tried various things by that point, including anal but in a very basic setting. We'd done all the public stuff, sex in a car, sex in a toilet. Although one day, my boyfriend mentioned to me that we hadn't done anal sex in a public bathroom. And so there, the idea was then set into motion.

Because he's a romantic, or was a romantic, he let me choose the site. It took weeks of meticulous planning, searching for locations recommended by users on Reddit. But one day, it dawned on me, why not stick to what we are used to: the university bathrooms. We were both hall kids (up the studs) and we were well aware of all the silent bathrooms on campus. So why not use one of those?

The night was upon us, it was sort of cold and dreary, but I couldn't help but feel the romance in the air. Was it really romantic? Or just a really intense feeling of lust for this boy that I really thought I was going to marry (spoiler alert, I didn't). Regardless of what it might have been, we were both ready to start the journey into what could have been a bright future of sexual endeavours throughout the university campus.

I won't mention which bathroom it was, but I know that it was quiet and the hallway leading to the bathroom was dead empty. It wasn't even the sound of a moving building around us; it's almost as if fate wanted us in that place, at that time to do the deed.

"Should I play some music?" he asked, very timidly.

All I could think in my head was, what the heck kind of music do you play when someone is about to pound deep inside your ass? Too crass?

"Yeah sure," is all I could muster back before the stage was set.

He handed me one of the AirPods (classy) before starting what was probably the absolute WORST song possible. "Get Ur Freak On" by Missy Elliott.

Head banga, hit me Hit me, hit me

At this time, I'm going to spare you some of the details of orientation and how exactly I was positioned. But know that a guy eating out your ass, while listening to "Get Ur Freak On" by Missy Elliott, isn't exactly the most romantic setting. I mean, I should have surely known at that point that this wasn't going to go right, but I was in love with this boy.

Either way, he was ready.

To be honest, it was actually not too bad at this point. His pacing was alright, I was 'loose' so to speak. That was until my foot slipped from the edge of the bowl of the toilet into the water. I then swung down and smashed my head on the back of the toilet.

How could it possibly get any worse? I hear you all asking. Well, he then decided to try to help and save me by grabbing my hair and yanking my head upward, giving me whiplash.

I ended up with a black eye, a chipped tooth, and a massive headache. He ended up laughing, and apparently a bruised ego.

Some life advice, girlies; never do it in a bathroom.

Feature Kupu Whakaatu

Sleeping bag antics

RoughinIt3000

Sunsets have and will always be the most gorgeous thing to me. There’s something so beautiful about the way that it sits so softly on the horizon line. You know what isn’t so beautiful though? Morning wood poking you in your back when you’re forced to share a sleeping bag with your horny 19 year old boyfriend.

I’m all for spontaneous sex but this morning was extra spontaneous. We were both a week into camping with his whānau and there’s nothing that gets you hornier than time with the folks.

Wait, I think I phrased that wrong. You know what I mean right?

But there we were, a crisp morning by the ocean, the morning sun was sitting on the water, and we were both in the mood now. How much detail should I be going into? I will say this, I was rocking that boy’s shit up. I was doing the glock glock 3000. Rotating hands, slurping him the fuck up. Mans was entering a new level of heaven. I’m talking, eyes rolling into his skull, sort of happiness. I was giving him all I got and honestly it was working for me too.

We were going at it for about 10 minutes, switching positions and genuinely having a good time. Mind you, keeping silent where we could and attempting to mask the sound of wet slapping with the odd cough and laughter.

We both came together, panting and hugging as we tried to recover from that ordeal of a session. He needed to piss, and so did I but we didn’t go together. It was, no shit, maybe 5 seconds after he left before running straight back in and looking at me with wide eyes.

“They’re all sitting having breakfast and yes… they heard us”

Till the bed breaks

RoughinIt3000

So me and this girl were having sex, it was her first time, and we were going quite slow. We’d been talking for months and it had all been leading up to this point hey. We’d had a nice dinner and I’d asked her a million times if she was okay and if this is what she wanted. Every time, it was a “stop asking, I’m really fucking keen”, so I proceeded – with caution.

We were having a good time, the candles were lit, and we were playing some good music and just vibing with it. We’d started easy with me going down on her and her moaning in the most hot fucking way. I’d suggested she ride me but wasn’t too keen as she wasn’t sure how good she’d be. So I was on top but taking it pretty easy, when all of a sudden the entire mattress broke through the slats underneath and crashed to the floor.

it happened so fast it took a second to realise what even happened, and then we got up and, while still both naked, attempted to fix the bed. I was so fucking embarrased especially since our flat had hard wood floors. As it turns out, it happened because when I put together this cheap ass Warehouse frame I put one of the large pegs into a small hole, then realised that it was too big, took it out, and put the correct size one in. That stretched the wood enough for the peg to not totally fit anymore, and even the slightest jerking of the frame caused it to come out, which caused the slats to fall and the mattress to just plummet to the floor.

We stayed naked because we were stoned and didn’t think far enough to put clothes on, and when we were done we realised how silly that whole situation looked. It actually was a good bonding experience for us both and now we’ve been dating for five years. Gotta love some shit experiences to come together.

That’s how your Dad used to do it

DaddyFucker69

I’m not the most sexually advanced person as my body count is honestly a lot lower than some may assume. I dress sort of slutty but it’s definitely for me and no one else, stop fucking looking. But that doesn’t mean I haven’t been experimental with partners I have had. Anything from eating his ass, to threesomes with mates who were probably way too close for it to be comfortable. You name it, I’ve considered it.

Anyway, I was hooking up with this guy for a few months in 2021. We were so in sync you know? Like everything was clicking and I was just having a good fucking time. Anything I wanted to try, he was into it and encouraged me to look shit up for the next time we linked. Not to mention he was fiiiiine. Built asf guy with muscles and worked in construction. Or something because he owned a fuck load of hivis. Either that or he was a massive townie. I didn’t care if he could make me cum the way he did.

We stopped chatting when I got a little too emotionally involved, knowing that he wasn’t in that space nor was he looking for that. It was purely sexual for him. I had just forgotten that rule. My bad man, miss you. But I ended up blocking his number and moving on. Though I won’t lie and say he isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when the purr of my Satisfyer Pro 2 starts going.

There were a couple of dud hookups post tradie daddy. I was

chasing something that I couldn’t get without him. Until I hooked up with this tall finance bro. Not my usual type you know? Had a mullet and wore Rodd & Gunn quarter zips. That kind of bro. But the boy ate pussy like his life depended on it. Like I was his last meal and he’d been starving for weeks before coming over and going downtown on me. A true saint of a boy.

We started ‘dating’ because I wasn’t going to let that go to waste, and I wasn’t fucking dumb. That’s how it went for a while. He came over, proved to Ice Spice that he was in fact a munch, and then we’d cuddle and watch shit on Amazon prime. That was till I was scrolling his Facebook one night, showing the girls the boy who made me wetter than the pacific when suddenly there he was. My hi-vis daddy with his arm wrapped around the young gun and smiling the EXACT SAME FUCKING SMILE.

Now this is the point where I should’ve flicked him a ‘sos bro im out’ text. But you know how I mentioned earlier that I wasn’t fucking stupid?

������

To the boy who still occasionally comes over and chows down on the grecian goddess that is my pussy, I can in fact say that you do it like your dad used to!

Feature Kupu Whakaatu

Now clap

Fist-a-tron

Once I was hooking up with a guy from Tinder, and between the alcohol, condoms, and nerves from being with a new guy, I needed a little assistance from Mr. Lube.

So I reach over grab the lube, and then my brain goes into autopilot. I’ve done this before, I know what to do.

Putting a small amount in the palm of my hand, I started to rub that shit into my hands like lotion.

Suddenly I realize what the fuck I’m doing, I stare at my hands, back at this guy, back at my hands and I start dying laughing. Like tears are streaming down my face laughing. Brain malfunction level 11. He looked horrified.

In retrospect, he was probably like “where does she plan on putting that hand?”.

I never heard from him again.

The day Ted Bundy came to stay

Fist-a-tron

I’m not sure how familiar you all are with kinks. But the world of kink is a strange and winding beast. Once you start delving into it, the more random shit you realise you’re into. I’ve met some good mates in the kink world and some equally hot hookups. Anyway, I had this very kinky fuck-buddy for a while. We were both matched well in what we were into. There were not a whole lot of limits, and we were open to exploring. I should mention I’m a pretty tall guy, and fairly strong. What this meant is she was into me being a bit aggressive.

One night, I’d come home post gym to a text from her saying, “I want you to fucking own me” and a particularly lovely snapchat from her. Now I’m a man for the people, I’m not going to disappoint am I? So I showered and sent an equally cheeky snap back with the caption, “well come and fucking get it then”. Yeah that shit worked.

It’d been maybe 10 minutes and then she was at my door, waiting patiently for me. We have this way of asking for consent with hand squeezing because there’s usually a gag involved. So we went ahead with it. We are getting hot and heavy in the hallway, leading to the room and I throw her on the bed. She's very much into Consensual Non Consent. I won’t be explaining that, you’re welcome to give it a search if you like. So I tell her what I'm going to do to her by force.

What I MEANT to say was "Yeah, you want me to throw you on the bed and rip your fucking pants off?".

What I SAID was "Yeah, you want me to throw you on the bed and rip your fucking legs off?".

She was stunned but I could see a smirk forming immediately after I said it. We laughed for a good hour or so. To this day I still say it when she comes over.

I firmly believe that people don’t grow out of toys; they get into new ones. I can’t name anyone who does not love a good sex toy. Why is this? Because they are crafted for one thing: pleasure.

If you don’t like them, chances are you just haven’t found the right

a Meccano kid, and I’m a Satisfyer Pro woman. Like you’re either someone good at sharing or not, but these are the toys that you’ve purchased for yourself, so it’s entirely up to you. This analogy also explains why I justify eating dessert for dinner at least twice a week, but the point is there are pros to being an adult.

So, this is your sign! If you haven’t tried toys yet, go for it, and if you have, keep going! Order them online and keep them at the bottom of your bedside table! Don’t blame me if after this you don’t need your partner anymore…

Don’t use toys

I don’t care about mutual pleasure. It’s basically cheating. You only

Maramara Kōrero Column

Considering this is the sex edition let me introduce you all to the tunes of love that can help you get in the mood and hopefully hit the high notes. For these songs it can be the melody, the tone, the context or even the voice. This playlist will consist of 10 songs because realistically who needs more than 10 songs to fuck? If you do, you either have medical issues or that dick game is weak. Either way sex for you probably isn’t as good as it can be x

Chris Brown: Under The Influence, Back To Sleep, Take You Down

For the first one this can technically be called cheating but your man cheated on you and you took him back so let you can let this slide too. Our first addition is C Breezy because why not, he has too many songs that can potentially be here but let me highlight these 3 specifically

Exchange by Bryson Tiller

The lyrics alone should be enough sexual tension to get the job done but the melodies do so much for tempo and atmosphere. This song creates a whole experience and is worthy on its place here

Kissin’ On My Tattoos by August Alsina

The sensual duality of the high notes and slow melodies do too well in breaking down the moment of intimacy. The tempo can potentially act like a guide for the lads

Neighbors

Know My Name by Trey Songz

Now how can we have a sex playlist without the man himself. Arguably he could also have a lot of work featured here but I resolved to just putting this track because why not

Sex

With Me by Riri

Self explanatory

Comfortable by H.E.R

Just H.E.R singing to you should be enough to get you in the mood but the beat drops later in the song after the built up tension where foreplay stops and you get to work

Streets by Doja Cat

Needless to say this song belongs on the playlist

Come Thru by Summer Walker & Usher

Just how soft and gentle Miss Walker's voice is with the attitude behind her lyrics goes crazy. It honestly doesn’t need much to be used as a background noise for fucking but this song would be at the forefront of it all

Pillowtalk by Zayn

Personally I think this shits a bit too corny but I can see it being on the playlist. The way Zayn is singing the lyrics and the fastening tempo and intensity of the music can do wonders in getting across that finish line

The Weekend by SZA

I think having sex to this song should be a rite of passage.

At the end of the day people fuck in different ways. Some people need the music and some do not. This has just been my playlist to help. Although results may vary. Who knows you could end up parents because you got too caught up and told mans to finish inside. Don’t be silly, wrap your willy.

Column Maramara Kōrero

I have this weird thing where I need the lights off and to be under the covers if I’m having sex. I’m okay with the bedside lamp being on, but the big light stays off. And we need to stay under the covers. This is because of my crippling self-consciousness.

Someone seeing me completely naked and exposed scares the living sh*t out of me. Naked and afraid if you will. At the ripe age of 20 - something, I’m scared of being naked in front of another person I intend to have sex with. I can flash my tits, I can get changed in front of my friends, no problem. But being naked in front of someone I intend to have sex with is terrifying, because it feels like I’m offering myself on a silver platter. What if they take one look and don’t like what’s on the menu? That has never happened before, but it doesn’t settle the constant fear inside me that it will.

When I first started having sex, it felt very preformative. It wasn’t terrible sex, but at the same time, it wasn’t anything special happening. I felt the need to make encouraging sounds to not hurt the other person's feelings. I wasn't thinking about how good it feels for me; all I thought about was ‘do I look good in this angle?’.

I think young girls get that from being exposed to unrealistic sex standards set by the adult film industry. BFFR. No one watching porn is thinking about how what they are watching is a production. Behind the scenes, there’s so much preparation in order to get the perfect (cum) shot. Hair and makeup. Sound and lighting film crews. Directors. Paid actors who have been in the industry and have done this one hundred times. This is all to make a video that you wish you could be a part of. I just learnt from Chloe Cherry that squirting is peeing, and actors will chug a gallon of water before filming squirting scenes. Professional porn is fake.

Casual sex for me, is a pipeline to marriage. That might be crazy fr, but I can’t have sex without some kind of emotional connection, and if I do, I’ll probably end up developing some kind of attachment to you. I wish I was sexually liberated, but part of me feels like I was built with inherent shame and anxious attachment issues. When I was about 12, I put a mirror down there to see what it looked like. I ended up crying for hours because I scared myself. I didn’t know that strange alien looking thing would become such an important tool as I grew older and more conventionally

attractive. I didn’t know pussy made the world go around.

It’s hard because I can’t have sex without part of me feeling I’m putting on a performance. I need to bend myself like this, and flick my hair like that, and look at them like this. It’s exhausting. I don’t want to fake it, but I don’t want to hurt this other person's feelings by telling them what they’re doing is just… not it. When it’s sexy time, I need the light off to feel sexy. Maybe I’m just a self-conscious freak. Or maybe you know exactly how I’m feeling and it’s comforting knowing you’re not in a boat rowing down the stream of ‘why do I have weird connotations attached to sex?’ by yourself.

One day, the right person will come along and sex will become something different. It won’t be a performance anymore, it’ll be your favourite pastime with your favourite person. Call me old school, but I think sex feels different when you’re in love (that was so cringe, someone please put me down). Sometimes in the world of hinge, bumble, tinder, and all the other bullshit, it’s just easier to get a Satisfyer Pro 2 and run away from everybody until you get taken out the streets.

Feature Kupu Whakaatu

It’s finally the time of year when we talk about sex. From endless love making sessions to a quickie in a party bathroom, there’s one thing that every sexy act needs; consent. Sex shouldn’t be scary, and you should always feel safe, and you should make sure your partner feels the same. So, here’s a quick and easy guide to make sure you’re doing it right.

No Means NO

It doesn’t matter when you want to stop; whether it’s in the beginning or later on, you are at free liberty to say no. And if you’re told no, respect that person’s wishes. Bringing up that whoever you are with previously said yes does not mean them later saying no isn’t valid. NO MEANS NO.

Communication Is Key

The easiest way to make sure consent is being heard and recognised by all parties is by remembering these four words: CLEAR, ONGOING, COHERENT, and VOLUNTARY. Talking openly about sex is the best way to ensure that those involved are undoubtedly up to the task. From small questions like “Can I kiss you?” and “Can I take this off?”, to the bigger, steamier ones, it’s important that consent is being asked and vocalised before and during any sexual encounters.

Respect Is Owed

Do you remember in school when teachers would say “treat others the way you want to be treated”? Well, the same applies here. Respect is a direct line to and from consent, and it’s important that both yourself and your partner feel respected when engaged in any kind of sexual activity. Ongoing communication is key to this; talk through it, and remember to not be a dickhead or let someone treat you like shit.

Consent Under The Influence

*Starts playing Chris Brown*

Consent under the influence is a tricky subject. It’s true that alcohol can make a difference between answering yes or no, and it’s also true that the “yes” may not be what that person would say sober. So, how do you navigate that? It’s different for all people because of many factors, including alcohol tolerance. The same

rules before apply (obviously). If someone is clearly incapacitated (slurring words, stumbling, etc.), they cannot consent. As said before, consent should be clear and coherent. If your partner cannot consent then sex is completely out of the question. If you feel unsafe, pressured, or unclear, you cannot consent. Staying safe is your number one priority.

So, What Does Consent Look Like?

Here are a few points about what consent looks and sounds like:

Solid answers. There are no maybes, and silence is definitely not a yes. Clear answers of yes and no will define whether consent is given or not.

Enthusiasm is a key to a healthy sexual experience; if both parties are engaging enthusiastically after agreeing to have sex, then that’s good (lol that sounds so weird I don’t know why).

Continuous communication at every step, from messages, to hooking up; it doesn’t matter if this is a one time thing or a committed relationship. Communication is key!

Similar to the first point, the absence of “no” does not mean “yes”. So, respect the other person if they decide, at any moment, that they have changed their mind or if they haven’t explicitly agreed to engaging in any sexual activity.

Safe sex does not just mean using protection. Safe sex is about how a person feels, and if feelings change, you should never degrade or try to persuade that person. Sex should always be a comfortable experience for everyone, and the environment you create with that person should be safe, respectful, and consensual. We’re in a time where sex is no longer a major taboo, so knowing how to make an experience really good is very important. So, the next time things are getting a little steamy, remember this: consent is non-negotiable. And it’s also very sexy.

If readingyou’re this, I’m a munch.

Reviews Arotakenga

070 Shake

This is an official love letter to Danielle Balbuena, or otherwise known by her stage name, 070 Shake. If you don’t know who 070 Shake is, today is your lucky day. Chances are you’ve heard her work before, her vocals are featured in Kanye West’s 2018 album, Ye. Shake’s vocals in ‘Violent Crimes’ and ‘Ghost Town’ elevates the tracks to an ethereal level. She’s also the most beautiful human you’ll ever lay your eyes on, and I’m not the only one who thinks so. Last year she was in a relationship with Kehlani, and this year her current girlfriend is rumoured to be Lily-Rose Depp from ‘The Idol.’ Are you fucking kidding me, they are both so lucky…

Dani’s stage presence is second to none. The atmosphere was pumping as soon as we got inside, everyone was buzzy and patiently awaiting to bask in the presence of 070 Shake (lyric reference). The Powerstation was a great venue, it was clean, and the crowds were tame. The staff did their job a little bit too well. It wasn’t packed to the brim full of people, there was enough space where you could dance and had the ability to grab a drink from the bar, and find your friends in your original spot. Normally people would be pushing, shoving to get to the front, but from where I was standing the crowd was well behaved.

Who would have known that one random Monday evening in July would unintentionally become one of the best days of my life. Dani started the show off with the iconic intro to Kanye’s Violent Crimes, and from then on proceeded to literally rock everyone’s world. The music matched with the perfect dose of autotune made her vocals sound otherworldly. The curated show setlist was balanced between heartfelt melodies and crowd pleasers. When Shake performed ‘Honey’, everyone in the bitch was throwing it back. When she performed ‘Blue Velvet’ we whispered how she hasn’t played that song

in a while because it was about her ex-beau Kehlani. Everyone was there for the same reason. To bask in the amazing presence of 070 Shake. She finished the show with her feature in Ye’s Ghost Town. Chef’s kiss.

After the show, Dani came out to greet fans, she signed autographs and took photos. I didn’t want to swarm her so I stood back. As she was passing, my friend Jordan asked her what she used for her curls, she dabbed him up and told him ‘don’t worry I gotchu, I’ll put you on.’ I told her that we loved the show and we loved her, she said ‘thank you, you guys are beautiful.’ This interaction single handedly gave me another reason to wake up every morning.

There are times you leave a show and you feel like the world has just been reset. 070 Shakes show did that for me. It makes you feel grounded, connected, uplifted and empowered. Holding old friends while we bask in the presence of the most gorgeous and talented person in the world has become a core memory. I’ll think about Danielle everyday until I get to see her again. If you’re reading this Dani (I doubt it), I’m a munch.

If you didn’t know who 070 Shake is, congradulations you get to experience her for the first time and I’m jealous of you. If you want a deep drive, listen to her albums ‘You Can’t Kill Me’ or ‘Modus Vivendi’ as a cohesive whole. If not, here’s a few of my personal favorites to get you started.

My top 070 Shake songs (in no particular order):

• Guilty Conscious

• Danielle (smile on my face)

• Honey

• Skin and Bones

• The Pines

• Cocoon

old

Top

Willy Wonka Trailer- Might flop but looks okay. 6.5/10.

Mbappé to the Saudi League? - Bro don’t do it, come to the Prem. 0/10.

Battlestar Galactica - This shit is

but holy fuck it’s awesome. 9/10.

50 Songs to Have Sex To (Spotify) -Apart from “Dilemma” (it’s about cheating bffr), it’s alright (?). 7/10.

Jak: Let’s start off easy, you guys messaged us in the hopes of an interview. On a scale from 1-10, how obsessed are you? Like geez, buy me dinner first.

Hahahahah, definitely a solid 11 ��, Nexus Mag is the sole reason we get out of bed in the morning and make music.

Jak: I think with a name like Lunar Intruder there’s an immediate transcendent vibe you give off. Where do you derive your sound? Who are some of your inspirations?

We honestly didn’t plan our sound around the name aye! It kinda just randomly just got thrown around at practice and we went from there. We derive our sound from relatability/ personal experiences along with what we’re bumping on Spotify at that point in time lol. Inspirations include: Fontaines DC, Mar- lins Dreaming, Turnstile, Soaked Oats, Radiohead, Skegss etc.

Jak: I’d be lying if I said that Solar Hangover hasn’t been saved in my library for a while–what can we expect from the upcoming music? Any callbacks?

I’d say it's more closely based on our third EP, Moon- light. We rated how that sounded so thought we’d head in that sort of direction. We’re all getting older, reminiscing about the old days with the homies get- ting on the rark in the shithole flats we used to live in, so this album is gonna have a more self-reflecting/ coming of age/nostalgic tone to it.

Jak: I want to know what everyone’s favourite drink is. Nothing sinister here.

Matt – Lion Red (Virgin).

Cam – Red wine (Yuck).

Max – Whisky Highball (Balla).

Ricki – Hazy IPA (Wetwipe).

Jak:With an upcoming tour in August, who would you love to open for in the future? And likewise, who would you want opening for you?

FONTAINES

DC OR THE BETHS ������

Nah in all seriousness we want people to hit us up to open for them.

Especially if they’re new to the scene or don’t get opportunities to play in front of decent sized crowds. We wanna help out as many up-and-coming bands as we can. (We were once in their shoes).

Jak: What can people expect when coming to a Lunar Intruder show? Any major things to watch out for?

A lot of nudity, shit chat, shoey’s and phat groovy basslines. ��

Jak: With the new single ‘Inside Out’ coming out soon, is there an EP on the horizon? Am I being needy? Should I calm down?

We've got an album coming out in April. ��

Jak: And finally, Hamilton shows when?

May 2024 ��

B’z Em Up

We spotted Anneka in the Pā studying, casually killing this monochromatic slay. The red on red is slaying. However, what elevates this fit to the next level is her use of accessories. The ribbon in the custom air forces with the slick back bun is on par with the ballet-core trends of late winter. So tough. The drip on the neck and wrists? The wrist watch and the charm bracelet? Too tough. Stop playing with em riot, she ate that fit UP and left zero crumbs. Nexus loves to see it, go forth and slay queen.

Trend Alert: Red on red on red

Kakahu Tauira Fit Check

Kaylin, 21, Comms

1. Generally submissive

2. That's a hard one. Nothing standing up.

3. Tom Holland

4. Like changing rooms

5. No I can't

Hirini, 19. Sports Science

1. Dominant as, hella

2. Probably Cowgirl aye

3. Ryan Reynolds. Hella

4. Behind the Marae

5. Lana Rhodes Temple, 20, Strategic

1.Submissive?Fuckno.Dominantaye

2.Ilikethelayingdownonesaye.

3.I'mnotgaybutRyanReynolds

4.Heapsofstuff.Butpublic.Anywhere there'speople

5. Lana Rhodes

Alisha, 18, Law

1. Switch. Depends on the mood

2. One where I have to do work.

3. Dylan Sprouse in his wedding photos

4. Anywhere in public. Where you get caught

5. Mia Khalifa

Ashton, 19, Business

1. Only had dominant but don't know if that's what I want.

2. Missionary aye.

3. Young Megan Fox

4. Like an infinity pool or sky diving

5. Mia Khalifa, Lana Rhodes, Lena Paul, Johnny Sins, hitomi tanaka

1. Sub or Dom

2. Least favourite positions

3. Sexiest Celebrity

4. Most freaky place to fuck

5. Can you name a pornstar

Wheako Tauira Lifestyle

WORDS TO DO WITH THINGS

We-Vibe

Zumio S Precision

Dame Eva II

Rose Stimulator

Satisfyer Pro

Lelo Ina Wave

United States President

The Tennis Pro

Tango X

Jessica Rabbit Vibrator

Maude Vibe Cone

Je Joue

Gläs Nubby

Tenga Iroha

Ohmibod

Zalo Aya

Lelo Tor

Lovense Lush

Nipple Suckers

Good Head Spray

Womanizer

Dame Aer

Ora

Dame Fin

Be OneLyla

Tango X

Tiani

Mociex

1. What is the name of the largest glacier in the world?

2. What constant is equivalent to 96,485 coulombs per mole of electrons?

3. During the Kentucky Derby races, what fashion event is known as part southern tradition and part spectacle?

4. What was Alaska called before 1867?