issue 12 2011

MAY 30TH 2011

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POLITICAL INTERVIEWS

POLITICIANS SPEAK

This week we bring you 2 political interviews packed with facts

COLUMNS

It’s columns galore! Bonus columns for the end of semester!

SPORTASTIC

C-ball exposes Lance Armstrong, revealing the secret to his powers

LETTUCE

You rant, we print it

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Choose from: Fries, creamy mash, fresh salad, mixed roast veges, steamed greens

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CONDITIONS APPLY

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POLITICAL INTERVIEWS Credits: EDITOR: Art Robinson (editor@nexusmag.co.nz) DESIGN: David Nixon (design@nexusmag.co.nz) ADVERTISING: Tony Arkell (ads@nexusmag.co.nz) NEWS EDITOR: James Manning (news@nexusmag.co.nz) FILM EDITOR: Richard Swainson (films@nexusmag.co.nz) BOOKS EDITOR: Kevin Pryor (books@nexusmag.co.nz) GAMES EDITORS: Sash Nixon (games@nexusmag.co.nz)

Contributors Dirty Old Blair Munro, Shannon Rolfe, Loud American Mackenzie McCarty, Judy’s Sweet Legs, Dr Richard Swainson, Owen “Beef” Hinton”, Honest Matt, Kylie Zinsli, Jess Edmonds-Saunders, Danielle Wall, Mrs. Matthews, Jade Carey, Josh Cooper, Daniel Farrell, Sam & Zane, Esther Coker, Lauren KB, Mandy Suess-Ryan, Rawinia Judson, Caitlin Hayns, Aaron.Letcher, Kate Cogswell, Monique Hamilton, and Campbell “Ultimate Warrior” Weal.

Nexus is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA).

Or at least, we think we are.

THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THIS PUBLICATION ARE NOT NECESSARILY THE VIEWS OF NEXUS PUBLICATIONS 2003 LTD, ANY OF OUR ADVERTISERS, THE WSU, APN, THE EDITOR, OR ANYONE. WE THINK THAT THESE LITTLE JOKES AREN’T READ BY ANYONE BUT US. AND THAT PERVY GUY IN MY BIO LAB.

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CREDITS & CONTENTS

MAY 30RH 2011

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EDITORIAL

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PREZ SEZ

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THE MAGIC 8-BALL

7-10 11

NEWS SPORTS THOUGHTS

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LETTUCE

14-19

WSU PAGES

20-21

INTERVIEW - RUSSELL NORMAN

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INTERVIEW - TE URUROA FLAVELL

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A QUICK ONE, TWO

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PUZZLES

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FOOD

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COLUMNS AND REVIEWS GIG GUIDE

FAX: 07 838 4588 EMAIL: editor@nexusmag.co.nz POSTAL: Private Bag 3059, Hamilton

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EDITORIAL WITH THE HAMMER RHETORICATORIAL Politics has to be one of the most fun things in the world, but also the most deadly.

Politics have brought about wars and famines and mass executions.

Politics is the religion of atheists, I have heard, and equally to blame for death and war and destruction. The Catholic Church burnt books, as did the Nazis and the Communists. The Crusades were a kick in the teeth for the Middle East, just as Saddam Hussein’s invasion of Kuwait, or the foundation of Israel, were a thousand years later.

perfect sense to the All-American MILF was to display a board on her website, mapping out those members of government who supported a bill that Sarah Palin did not support. To denote the districts these people held, cross hairs were placed.

When Gabrielle Giffords, fourth on the list of targeted politicians, got shot in the face and six people were killed around her, the map was removed by Sarah Palin’s website and she went on the defensive. Palin even claimed that this was part of a blood libel against her.

Politics is also a place of great hilarity. With parliamentary privilege, our politicians are able to say whatever they want

Jarred Loughner, the shooter in that attack, was no angel. He had dropped out of college and was paranoid about mostly everything.

to whoever will listen, provided it takes places in the halls of parliament. Members of Parliament are known to flip each other the bird and call each other out on things not even remotely connected to legislation.

The American government, he was sure, had committed the attacks of September the 11th and was ushering in the New World Order.

He was what we’d call a “tinfoil hat warrior”.

Hone Harawira is one of my favourite members of parliament.

I will never vote for him and I think most sensible people will follow suit, but he is straight up. He’s not a clone from the vats of the National Party or Labour Party research and development wings, like some people. The answers he gives to questions from the media are always a good read and inevitably follow this pattern “A happened because B are racist, white motherfuckers. Also, C is racist for not calling B racist motherfuckers”.

He’s a crazy guy and to me, as a writer, that is awesome.

I don’t even think he’s a racist. I believe that he truly believes that he is the target of racism. On Wikipedia, the best place for factual research, his heroes are listed as including Muhammed Ali and Nelson Mandela.

Now I get it.

No. Wait. I don’t.

While I absolutely acknowledge the hilarity of Hone Harawira and the joy he brings me every time I visit Stuff.co.nz , I also have to acknowledge the fact that the rantings and ravings of political figures have results that are often quite grim.

Sarah Palin is, some critics claim, guilty of this.

Sarah Palin, tired of the liberals and democrats letting gays get married and treating Mexicans like human beings, decided it wasn’t time to retreat, but instead that it was time to reload. Now, when most of your constituents are rednecks, uneducated and well armed, using gun metaphors might not be such a good idea. Sarah Palin, however, the woman who hunts moose in the traditional “from a helicopter” style, thought it made perfect sense. Also of

Democrats and anti-gun lobbyists were quick to link the two events, but the fact remains that there is no solid link between the two. Sarah Palin is crazy and loves guns. So is Jarred Loughner.

That’s about it.

The fact remains, however, that Sarah Palin’s rhetoric was blamed, almost immediately, by everyone and anyone with an axe to grind against Republicans, the tea Party or guns.

Perhaps Hone Harawira and other New Zealand MPs should take a lesson from Sarah Palin’s violent wake up call. If you rant and rave, people will think it’s just funny. Your name will be in the papers, for all the wrong reasons and when shit goes down, you’re going to be called out to answer first.

It doesn’t matter if you were the one to pull the trigger, or the one drawing crosshairs on a map: people need someone to blame and politicians aren’t overly popular on the best of days.

PREZ SEZ Budget 2011 Analysis – what does it mean for Students?

Budget 2011 has been revealed and there are some changes in store for students. It is clear that the government has failed to properly invest in education, ensure fair access to tertiary education, and tackle student debt.

In a nutshell, the 2011 budget shifts money around the same pot with no meaningful boost to tertiary funding; it targets students over 55, part time students, and overseas graduates; and forecasts a decline in total tertiary funding and student allowance spending in the future.

However, the Budget does provide some funding increases in specific areas for the sector.

The following analysis will consider the changes Budget 2011 presents and will briefly highlight the implications for students and tertiary education in two key sections: 1) Funding and fees; 2) Student loans; 1) Funding and Fees: •The Budget Economic and Fiscal Update projects a fall in overall tertiary expense over the next 5 years from $4.6 billion in 2010 to a forecast $4.1 billion in 2015. •It shows total spending on tertiary education falling by at least $200 million per year, or over 4% •It is not just student loan funding that has been cut. Over the next four years, there are also cuts to tuition funding, student allowances and other funding. •Again the government is shifting money around in the same pot. It says it is using ‘savings’ from student loans, industry training, and aviation training to fund more places in medicine, PTEs, and ESOL; and to provide the 2% subsidy increase for degree and postgraduate study, and to fund the Canterbury skills package. •For 2012, the Budget will provide a total of $2.743 billion to fund institutions in terms of tuition subsidies and research. Last year it was $2.782bn and the year before that it was $2.755bn.

2) Student Loans: •Loans do remain interest-free. This is welcome but never guaranteed! •Changes to the over-55 provisions: this removes access to student loans for living and course costs for people aged over 55 from 1 January 2013. This will cut $46m over 4 years. •Removes the course-related costs component of student loans for part-time full-year students. This is a funding cut of about $20m in 2012/13, rising to $31m in 2013/14. •Freezes the student loan repayment threshold at $19,084 until 1 April 2015. This locks in a very low repayment threshold. Australian graduates enjoy a repayment threshold of $44,912. •Funding for pilots: from 2012, tertiary education providers delivering pilot training programmes will be able to charge students a maximum fee of $39,273. Students will not be able to borrow through the student loan scheme for the solo flight hour requirements for Private Pilots and Commercial Pilots Licences. This cuts $43m over 4 years.

At 7 calories per gram, alcohol is stuffed with calories, and that's just the calories in the Calories in the drinkÂ’s sugar comes on top of that. Also, alcohol stimulates your appetite while reducing your self-control. That means youÂ’ll eat more.

Citysafe information & assistance: Phil Shaw, Hamilton City Council, 07 958 5993.

Deni Tokunai WSU President 027 5734241 president@wsu.org.nz

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MAGIC 8-BALL The Magic 8-Ball wins every election through fear! The Magic 8-Ball wins with a landslide and then it wins with a volcanic eruption! The Magic 8-Ball wouldn’t touch Monica Lewinsky, because the Magic 8-Ball has taste! The Magic 8-Ball demands you enrol to vote and demands you pay homage to its orby goodness on election day! All hail the Magic 8-Ball! Long may it reign! Long may its enemies die before the firing squads of oppression! The Magic 8-Ball is our last hope! On to the questions: Should I vote for the Mana Party in case Hone Harawira wants to call me a racist?

Don’t count on it, Hone Harawira isn’t actually a real person; he’s a figment of his own imagination, experiencing himself subjectively. I am also on LSD right now. DO NOT JUDGE THE 8-BALL! 8-BALL ALONE PASSES JUDGEMENT! How many votes do I get, because I’m rich as all hell?

Answer unclear, Depends on how many people you can bribe to vote the same as you.

If you are very poor and very smelly though, loudly announce your love of your least favourite political party and watch polling shift dramatically.

Will voter turnout for the WSU election in B-Semester reach new highs this year?

My answers say no, Without a doubt, as wave and waves of libertards try their best to get into the WSU Executive, sell off all the WSU assets and then go on lengthy trips to fundamentalist Christian conferences in America. But hey, at least people will be voting.

Can Obama show us his real birth certificate?

Not likely, I thought the U.S. killed him a few weeks ago and threw his body in the sea? Oh wait. Sorry, wrong guy.

Are you really a Magic 8-Ball? Or just some dick?

Answers point to yes.

Attached to almost all balls is a dick, but am I the ball or the dick? Or are we both part of the same package? I don’t know, but the one thing I do know is: Your mother loves both!

Will you have my babies?

Reply Hazy, Why do you want me to have them? What’s wrong with your perfectly adequate care? Honestly, I wouldn’t know what to do with them and would probably lose them, remember – Magic 8-Ball is intended for children ages 3 and up – I am a choking hazard and your mother knows all about that.

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NEWS

Online Discussion of Controversial Piracy Legislation

BUDGET 2011: A PRETTY SHITTY DEAL

By Mikoo Kerby Part-timers and old-timers have been kicked square in the pants by the Government’s latest Budget. Despite having the same financial needs as any student, those aged 55 and over are no longer eligible for loans other than tuition fees, while part-time students are now refused access to course-related costs.

Newly-elected Young Labour President Ella Hardy spoke out against the “inequitable” cuts. “National have broken their promises on Kiwisaver and introduced changes that shatter youth confidence in the scheme. Cutting our savings scheme at a time when New Zealand needs to invest its future will only harm young people in the coming years” Hardy asserted.

Other changes to the tertiary sector as a result of this year’s budget include cutting the current three-year loan repayment holiday for overseas debtors down to a single year, and the kneecap-worrying inclusion of a “contact person” for all new loan applications, to help track down borrowers when they vanish into the jungles of Borneo, pockets overflowing with illgotten handouts.

By Jimmy Manning

there was no copyright law and you accessed that work, you’d be governed by the law in your country” she said.

The Creative Freedom Foundation is a charitable organisation that represents thousands of New Zealand musicians, film makers, visual artists, designers, writers, & performers.

Created in the name of protecting public rights in terms of artistic creativity, Creative Freedom Foundation co-founder Bronwyn stated the internet is an “essential service”, as opposed to a fundamental human right.

“I think the internet is an essential service, I’m not sure how it relates to a human right, but I think it’s becoming more and more important for people to act in a human society,” “Especially in New Zealand, it’s a massive form of business and the arts for people to interact with the world.”

David Farrar of Kiwiblog closed the discussion by offering valuable advice to all interested in “gaming” the new legislation which comes into effect on September 1st.

“Up to the 10th of August you’re fine, afterwards: be careful.

When you get your first notice, you can’t get your second till after 28 days, so you can wonder and have some fun.”

It takes up to 21 days for a notice to be processed and sent to the accused, meaning you could receive the first notice starting September 1st.

nexus | news

Green MP Gareth Hughes hosted an online public discussion on the controversial file sharing legislation last week, speaking with multiple tech experts on the matter.

Hughes acted as the mediator of the hour long live discussion, putting forth his own questions and asking some proposed by online viewers.

Vikram Kumar of NZ Internet voiced his opinion on the process of fining internet users, something he described as a ridiculous consequence of the bill that is difficult to accept. He said if a person is accused of illegally downloading copyrighted material, claiming that they didn’t do it, is unacceptable.

“That’s not enough, the law says, if you’re an account holder you’re liable. Saying it was my flat mate or my kids, that’s not an acceptable defence” Kumar stated.

InternetNZ is a non-profit open membership organisation dedicated to protecting and promoting the Internet in New Zealand.

He cleverly idealised the legislation in terms of who is actually liable of charges in a vehicle analogy.

“The analogy is, if you own a car, and you get stopped by a cop, the person driving the car is liable, if you get caught on a speed camera, the person who owns the car gets the fine” Kumar summarised.

Bronwyn Hollaway-Smith of the Creative Freedom Foundation later answered viewers’ questions on differing government copyright systems in terms of downloading artistic works.

“You are governed by the copyright law of the country you are in at the time. If somebody made the work in a country where

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New Zealand: A Satisfied Nation

By Jimmy Manning New Zealand scored in the top four of the first multi-national index of well being and health, suggesting that, at the end of the day, we’re all pretty happy.

The Paris based Organisation of Economic Cooperation and Development conducted this world wide survey via an interactive tool, measuring 20 different indicators in 34 countries.

The countries’ well beings were measured by a range of topics including Housing, Income, Jobs, Community, Education, Environment, Governance, Health, Life and Satisfaction, Safety and Work Life Balance.

New Zealand must be doing a heck of a lot right, as it ranked highly in all but one topic: Income. The average household earned less than the OECD average, while we also rated badly in long working hours.

In terms of Community however, 97% of people asked said they have someone to rely on in time of need, higher than the OECD average of 91%. 77% of people in New Zealand said they were satisfied with their life, above the OECD average of 59%. Even more believe their lives will be satisfying in the next 5 years.

Strengthening our case of a nation filled with optimism, we were also reported to have more positive experiences in the average day (feelings of rest, pride in accomplishment, enjoyment, etc) than negative ones (pain, worry, sadness, boredom, etc). At 78%, we rank higher in happiness than the average of 72%.

It’s only our financial wealth, in comparison with other rich nations, that prevents us from being on top.

Rounding out the top four are other happy campers Canada, Australia and Sweden.

Nexus May 2011.pdf

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Kiwis set to rock Glastonbury

By Jimmy Manning A range of kiwis have hit the big time and made the bill for the Glastonbury music festival, one of the most iconic and largest music festivals in the world.

Dance heavyweights Shapeshifter along with Ladi 6, Electric Wire Hustle, King Kapisi and Bella Kalolo will join previously booked national gems The Naked and Famous, The Pheonix Foundation and P-Money at the music and arts festival from June 24 to 26.

A total of 135,000 punters are expected to descend upon the festival at Worthy Farm near the town of Glastonbury.

Festival booker Malcolm Haynes said he added the new artists after witnessing impressive performances at showcases supported by Creative New Zealand.

“I love your music scene out there. Consider me a music ambassador for New Zealand.”

Headlining the bill are international acts U2, Coldplay and Beyonce. The kiwi artists will be sharing the stage with Morrissey, The Chemical Brothers, Queens of the Stone Age, Mumford and Sons and Pendulum.

Cancer ‘magic’ mushrooms By the Internet A mushroom common in Asian cooking dishes could be the answer and solution to prostate cancer, Australian researchers have found.

The compound called polysaccharopeptide (PSP) extracted from the turkey tail mushroom was found to annihilate prostate cancer stem cells and tumor formation in trials on mice.

Common treatments like chemotherapy and radiotherapy target some cancer cells, but not stem cells. Stem cells initiate cancer and cause the disease to spread, said Dr Ling, of the Australian Prostate Cancer Research Centre in Queensland.

“We find that this mushroom extract is very effective in targeting those cancer stem cells” he said.

20 mice carrying a gene to develop prostate cancer were used in a trial where scientists fed PSP to about half for 20 weeks. All those eating the extract didn’t develop the cancer, the others did.

The turkey tail mushroom has a history in cancer treatment, being used in various European countries and as well as China and Japan to boost the immune system in cancer patients.

With the holidays coming up, some of you may be shifting to new accommodation. You may have had it with the curfew in College Hall, or maybe your flatmates have started wearing your underpants. Maybe Dark Monks of the forgotten god Shantaramich have taken up residence in your ceiling.

Whatever the reason, here’s some top info on what’s happening in your flat, your rights and the rights of the landlord and other tenants, as sent to us by Youth Law, a free, confidential service for under-25s.

What is a tenant? How do I know if I am in a tenancy?

A tenant is a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord. You will know if you are in a tenancy if you signed the Residential Tenancy Agreement Form with your landlord.

If you are a tenant, it is important that you keep all agreements, records, and documents about your tenancy even after the tenancy is over. Documents include: your tenancy agreement, property inspection report, rent records and receipts, water, power and phone bills, letters from the landlord, and copies of letters you have sent to the landlord.

I’m flatting with my mates, so I’m a tenant, right?

Tenants named on the tenancy agreement have shared responsibility for the entire tenancy. This means that if one tenant causes damage to the property or gets behind in rent payments, all other tenants can be jointly or individually held responsible.

Tenants are bound by the Residential Tenancies Act.

A tenancy agreement is a written contract between the tenant and the landlord. If there’s no written contract, there’s no tenancy and much less rights.

Things the tenancy agreement should include are: The names and contact addresses of the landlord and tenant, address of the property, date the tenancy agreement is signed, date the tenancy is to begin, whether the tenant is under 18, the rent amount and frequency of payments, amount of bond, the bank account number where the rent is to be paid, a list of any chattels (like furniture, or curtains) provided by the landlord, and the type of tenancy and the date the tenancy will end if it is a fixed-term tenancy.

What do landlords have to do?

The landlord must provide and maintain the premises in a reasonable condition, allow the tenant quiet enjoyment, comply with all building, health and safety standards, inform the tenant prospective tenants if the property is on the market for sale, and not interfere with the supply of any services to the premises.

What do I have to do?

Responsibilities include paying the rent on time, keeping the premises reasonably clean and tidy, notifying the landlord if any repairs are needed, and paying for electricity, gas, telephone charges and water (unless otherwise stated). If any damage occurs, the tenant must notify the landlord asap.

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Flatmates are people who are living in the property but are not part of the tenancy agreement. In this case, it would be a good idea to have a separate flat/house sharing agreement. Importantly, flatmates are not covered by the law applying to tenancies which means you have fewer rights than someone on the lease.

I have a verbal agreement with my landlord – do I need a written tenancy agreement?

If you want more information about this or have queries about other legal issues, go to the Department of Building and Housing website, or call YouthLaw for free legal advice on 0800 UTHLAW, or visit our website www.youthlaw.co.nz.

YouthLaw Tino Rangatiratanga Taitamariki is a free legal service for under 25s nationwide. You can call us on 0800 UTHLAW (884 529) for free legal advice.

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Short News For Tall People With the Art’s Fist

Barack O’bama

American president Barack O’bama has visited the home town of his great-great-great grandfather, in the tiny Irish village of Moneygall.

Thousands of people lined the streets and throngs joined the president to down a Guiness in the local pub.

American presidents have a long history of claiming Irish ancestry, hoping to tap into the tens of millions of Irish-American voters.

President O’bama then went on to visit the Queen of England, bringing her the gift of potatoes from far away Ireland. It’s not like they’re going to run out anytime soon.

Chocolate Milk

National MP Tau Henare has caused a stir after tweeting comments regarding Hone Harawira.

In his tweet, Mr Henare claimed Mr Harawira was so racist that he added “chocolate milk to his tea”. Mr Harawira did not respond immediately, as it quite hard to type on an entirely black keyboard. In other news: Tau Henare is New Zealand’s funniest politician.

Benjamin Netanya-no

Despite requests from President O’Bama to restore borders to their 1967 position, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has refused to budge. Israeli settlements now dot territory which, in 1948, had been declared by the United Nations as Palestinian territory.

President O’Bama will soon begin a tour of Israel, paying a visit to the town where his great-great-great-great grandmother lived.

Because that’s how Barack rolls.

Tuscon Shooter Found Nuts

Jarred Loughner, the shooter in the Tuscon massacre has been found too crazy to face trial. Two mental health professionals reached this result after being given complete access to Loughner’s medical history and internet ramblings. Loughner will now be transferred to a federal institution for four months in an attempt to restore his competency before what will certainly be a short trial and then an execution. Sarah Palin, who unsuccessfully ran for president in 2008 and was instantly fingered for her perceived role in the shootings, has also been deemed mentally incompetent. In other news, this story contains a very dirty phrase.

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New York Butts Out Smoking

Smokers in the American city of New York are now be ferried out to sea for a casual puff, after the mayor signed a law into action banning citizens from smoking in public parks, on the boardwalk, under the boardwalk, at the beach or anywhere else you can get to. New York has also recently banned trans fats from use in food.

“We need to ensure that our public spaces provide just that - a healthy place in which to relax and enjoy the surroundings”, Mayor Bloomberg said.Auckland University banned smoking on their campus in 2010, while other American cities (San Francisco and Chicago) have also banned smoking from public spaces.

SPORTS THOUGHTS

WITH C-BALL

LANCE ARMSTRONG – NOW COMES IN THE FLAVOUR DOUCHEBAG For many people Lance Armstrong is the pinnacle of sporting success.

Believe it or not, riding a bike is quite hard, especially up mountains steeper than the cost of a private abortion, and Armstrong has done it with the utmost skill. He has won the Tour de France a record seven consecutive times, and won more awards than Steven Segal has starred in B grade crap box kung fu movies. If that wasn’t enough, he did it all with one working testicle. Yep, that’s right, Lance Armstrong was diagnosed with testicular cancer long before he went on a killing spree in the world cycling scene. Unlike Christopher Reeve, who was struck down by an atomic bomb dead leg and never walked again, Armstrong got back on the horse (ho ho I went there) and even had time to date that fox Sheryl Crow. Unfortunately, recent events have transpired against Armstrong, as a career plagued by drug taking accusations has once again resurfaced with one of his former teammates revealing he witnessed these transgressions in person.

Tyler Hamilton, a former cycling teammate of Armstrong’s, has revealed he witnessed the aforementioned along with other prominent leaders of the US Postal cycling team not only taking drugs, but promoting and conspiring to defeat doping programmes as well.

The shit Armstrong has allegedly dabbled in is impressive to say the least. EPO, the hormone Erythropoietin, was a big hit in the 90s among endurance athletes for its ability to influence red blood cell production, and something Armstrong has been linked to. In addition

Congratulations, because if Hamilton’s claims are true, we can finally tell every stupid cycling fan who posts dumbass videos on Facebook of some guy out riding another with the comment “oh my god this is so epic”, to shut the fuck up. It isn’t epic. To be honest there might not be anything more coma inducing than cycling. If cycling had a highlights reel, the sport is so bad it would consist of the occasional crash, person getting maimed, and a shitload of scenery. I can hear my nuts sighing already. The only cycling I’ve ever watched and enjoyed was the brief 8 second part of a Youtube ‘owned’ compilation,

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to that, it has also been revealed Armstrong along with other team members were handed out growth hormones in white paper lunch bags. I bet he was fucking gutted when he opened it up and realised it wasn’t actually a delicious bag of chicken nibbles, but some nasty shit that probably tasted like a combination of hooker’s ass and Jennifer Love Hewitt’s acting career. It is said Armstrong even went as far as having a banned blood transfusion – all in the pursuit of winning some lame ass race seven times and becoming the greatest athlete at a sport I can’t see any of us in New Zealand caring about anytime soon.

JOIN US ON

which featured a cyclist bailing at high speed and rolling down a hill, and it wasn’t even the best part of the compilation. Other than that, I’m not that interested, and if Armstrong is proven to truly be a cheat you can bet there are going to be a lot of broken hearts. Obviously though, these allegations haven’t been without reply, as many have rallied around their ‘hero’ to defend Armstrong from a case federal authorities are currently compiling.

Dear Imaginary God help us if this goes to court, because you can bet your life that it’ll end up being more drawn out than the entire series of Lost and the recovery of the Pike River bodies combined. Why couldn’t Armstrong not dabble in such high tech, flashy shit. Why couldn’t he just be one of those regular peons like Andrew Johns who didn’t chase the shit to make them perform better, but went for the good times new roman substances instead. If that had been the case, this would’ve been resolved a long time ago and I could’ve instead written this whole piece on whether Andrew Johns loved pingas and chewing his gums off. Damn you Lance, mostly.

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Lettuce Write to Win! SEND LETTERS TO: Send your letters to nexus@waikato.ac.nz

WEEKLY PRIZE: This week there is a prize! Brett from UniMart is kindly offering a $20 voucher to the writter of our letter of the week. Come to the Nexus office in the Student Union Building to collect your prize!

LETTERS POLICY: Nexus welcomes and encourages debate through the letters page, serious or not. Letters should be received by Wednesday 5pm on the week prior to publication. We’ll print basically any letter, but the editor reserves the right to abridge or refuse correspondence. Word count is limited to 250 words and we will enforce this as we please.

We won’t correct your spelling and grammar either, so it’s up to you how much of an idiot you look like. Pseudonyms are okay (all correspondence must include your real name and contact details – they won’t be printed if you don’t want them to be). Send letters to nexus@waikato.ac.nz

Chalk Commando Wins!

JUST THINK! That’s the message that’s been turning up all over campus, followed by thinly veiled yet judgmental anti-abortion messages.

There’s not much that gets me riled up enough to act, and maybe it had something to do with my good friend and Waikato Uni’s philosophy professor Alastair Gunn passing over the weekend, but I couldn’t pass Bennetts without buying a pack of chalk, and I couldn’t go to my office before making another circuit of the campus and writing a little rebuttal. I’m not saying my words were genius, but I felt people who have either experienced an abortion, or are in the process of making a decision deserve to know not everyone thinks they are wrong. I have two children and receive no support from the fathers at all. I knew that would be the case, I knew my life would be really hard and yet I didn’t consider an abortion because it wasn’t the right choice for me. But for many women, especially when they are at Uni struggling to get their lives really started, it is the right choice for them. And I figure it is their choice, not the government’s, not any God, and certainly not some pious person with a fat piece of chalk.

Life is hard, we all do the best we can. So JUST THINK about that.

So, I want to start by having a bitch at Mark.

You, sir, are an idiot. Did you really think someone wasn’t going to steal your iPod Touch?

There’s a reason there’s a police report in Nexus... Hamilton is full of thieves. And as the Library is a pretty public place, it’s going to be a prime target for them. Great, you’re a university student. Um, believe it or not, so are most people reading Nexus... Not exactly something to brag about... And if someone is a nasty thief, they aren’t going to read about it in Nexus, have a bit of a cry about how evil they are, take it to the Security Office and then maybe go jump off one of the bridges into the Waikato for good measure. Or they could just touch the water in the lake down by the Village Green. That would kill anyone. But regardless, you need to realise that the world is not as rosy. You’ve lost your iPod Touch. That’s what you get for using Apple products.

Now, moving to Mr Ben Cardwell. I sort of like what you are saying there... But I have a couple questions for you... Firstly, you mention “the climate is warming”... Oh dear... Here we go with the adjusted ‘evidence’ and the IPCC which says they have consensus by giving numbers of all scientists who submit material, but don’t tell you that half of those scientists submit material the opposite of what is published.......... Secondly, who would want to donate to Greenpeace. They’re a terrorist organisation in reality. Well, at least, to me, any organisation that illegally boards ships that are doing something they have a legal right to do, is a terrorist organisation.

Fiona Jackson Come pick up your $20 UniMart voucher at the Nexus office in the WSU Building.

So Wordy Hey there Nexus and Nexus readers!

So, last time I referred to myself as “A Law Student (did you guess?)”. I’m back. And I’m having a bitch about idiots in Lettuce. Thanks for having me and all. Oh, and I’m not referring to myself as “A Law Student” again. Mostly because that involves researching. And I really can’t be bothered.

And while I don’t have any problem with the only remaining Lettuce from last week, I should probably mention it so they don’t feel left out.

Anonymous, you are awesome. And no, I’m not referring to the internet hacking organisation.

They’re dicks. I agree that Busted was so much better before Snapstar. Though I do find it funny that, as far as I could see, there was no Busted page in this week’s Nexus.

I beg the people who write into Nexus... PLEASE STOP BEING DOUCHEBAGS!!! I don’t want to write this stuff. But I need to, because you guys are tools, and I don’t want to read your stupidity.

THE NEXUS LETTER OF THE WEEK WINS A

$20 VOUCHER FROM UNIMART

CONVENIENCE STORE HERE ON CAMPUS

FOOD, DRINKS, SNACKS AND DAILY ESSENTIALS ALL IN ONE FRIENDLY LOCATION

Love, kisses and double rainbows, The Self-Appointed Judge and Jury of the Lettuce Page

Facebook Non-Believer Dear Nexus readers, Let me tell you why I hate Facebook.

As you may have already guessed, no I do not have a facebook page. Every time people ask me why they couldn’t find me on facebook, I simply say ‘I don’t have a facebook’ and I get the same reaction every time: ‘OMG wtf are you serious?!’ And yes, I am serious. There are several reasons as to why I refuse to buy into this stupid fad.

Face it. Facebook does nothing but causes students to procrastinate, fuels rumours, gossip and drama and above all else, it does nothing but promote CYBER-STALKING. The losers that are stupidly addicted to it simply love it because they can be as vain and as much of a stalker as they want and not be judged for it cause every other retard on facebook uses it for exactly the same thing! Fucken hell it is pathetic.

People like to use several arguments to justify their facebook addictions.

Now before you go thinking I’m some anti-social nerdy bookworm geek, I’ll have you know I’m quite the opposite. I’m a first year law student, my favourite colour is pink, I idolise Kim Kardashian and I have a notorious ‘town whore’ reputation. Yet Facebook is one thing I simply can’t stand.

The fact that people have to resort to cyber stalking as a form of socialising is really quite sad, not to mention desperate.

LIVE IN THE REAL WORLD, PEOPLE. LIVE IN THE REAL WORLD. Queen Slore xx

Shitting in public = Smoking on campus?

Not only do I not have time for this shit we call ‘facebook’, I don’t want other people getting all up in my business and I seriously do not give a fuck about other people’s gay lives. I don’t want to see the slutty photos you took of yourself over the weekend, I don’t give a fuck what your status says despite the fact you feel the need to update it every five minutes and I really don’t want to know who my ex bf is fucking these

Smokers My message is simple. Smokers get your stinking cancer sticks off campus.where I don’t have to be assaulted by your pollution. It has been said that I like to eat and it is true. The second hand residue from eating is stinking scat. I don’t shit in public spaces on campus so why should I have to put up with your stink.

I have asked the University for a review of the

days!

smoking on campus guidelines as I believe it is a health and safety issue. I won’t hold my breath but I am getting pretty damn angry with having to put up with second hand smoke in lecture rooms and enclosed and covered areas.

Honestly, what the fuck happened to people interacting in real life?! Seriously, this is the marking of an era. Our generation is forever gonna be remembered as ‘the facebook freaks’.

If you can’t interact with me in real life then clearly you’re not of very much significance in my life and I therefore have no time for you.

Alcohol shrinks the prefrontal cortex and white brain matter in those who drink excessively, especially young men whose brains do not fully mature until their early 20s.

Anon Smoker

Where can I get help?

Brian has been feeling very depressed. His doctor has prescribed anti-depressants. He wants to know if there are any support groups that could help him.

Here are some of the groups which could help: Centre 401 Phone 838 0199 Graceway Phone 856 4266 Also there is a Depression Helpline which is available 24 hours: 0800 111 757 Lifeline Waikato is also available 24 hours: 0800 543 354 The Hamilton Area Citizens Advice Bureau provides advice and information from four locations. They are at 55 Victoria St (MonFri 9am-5pm), 70 Kent St Frankton (Mon-Fri 9am-4.30pm), Garden Place (Mon-Fri 11am-2pm) and the Cowshed at the University (Tues-Thurs 1-3pm). They also have legal, advocacy and consumer services available where you can get more specialised help.

Citysafe information & assistance: Phil Shaw, Hamilton City Council, 07 958 5993.

Phone the CAB on 0800 367 222 (0800 FOR CAB) or look at the CAB website www.cab.org.nz

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WSU PRESENTS

DO YOU HAVE TALENTS THAT YOU WANT TO SHARE WITH THE WORLD?

THEN ENTER THE WSU TALENT QUEST! AN EVENT TO SHOWCASE THE HIDDEN (AND NOT SO HIDDEN) TALENTS OF WAIKATO UNIVERSITY STUDENTS

WEDNESDAY JUNE 1 1-2PM VILLAGE GREEN

CAN YOU SING? DANCE? PLAY MUSIC? TELL JOKES? BALANCE TEN SPOONS ON YOUR NOSE? WE ARE LOOKING FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE KEEN TO GET UP ON STAGE AND SHOW OFF THEIR TALENTS TO ENTERTAIN THE STUDENT BODY FREE CAKE FOR ALL ENTRANTS AND EPIC PRIZES TO BE WON SO ENTER TODAY! EMAIL PRISCILLA@WSU.ORG.NZ TO BE IN TO WIN BOTH INDIVIDUALS AND GROUPS ARE WELCOME TO ENTER.

14

VP SPEAK

WITH TOKO

I support Hone Harawira.

Hone Harawira is the new hot fish in the political stream. Hone Harawira do you support him, do you love him, do you want to hop on his band wagon? What do you want to do.

He has been having several different hui around the motu about Hone Heke tax! So you may ask, what is Hone Heke tax? This is a tax on financial transactions rather than on consumption (GST). Instead of taking most of the ‘poor’ people’s money this tax would only take 1% of commercial transaction amounts.

The idea is that this money would mean there would be no need for everyone to pay a 15% tax on consumption.

So why do I support Hone Harawira? First of all, because he speaks his mind. He may seem a bit straight up, but some people don’t mind that, but just get over it. Accept that he is like that and move on. And he doesn’t lie, what you see is what you get.

When he was with the Maori Party, the Maori Party had one objective when they got into Parliament, when Tariana got kicked her out of Labour, which was our Foreshore and Seabed. Now, the Maori Party has gone to bed with National. And by that I say the Maori Party has cut deals with the National Party at Maori expense.

Hone Harawira has the interest of Maori and New Zealanders at heart. He is not racist he is an extremist, with all peoples rights at heart. Hone Harawira is not an activist he is trying to keep the Government honest.

Toko Baker VP Māori Waikato Students’ Union

027 2065126 vpmaori@wsu.org.nz

The WSU would like to stress that this

“If I were to pick a representative of all Maori, I would pick Hone. Not because he reflects most Maori, but because he takes his job as a representative seriously. He remembers that his mana is derived from the people and the people can take it back, there is no pretending, nothing fake or forced.”

Morgan Godfery Ngai Tuhoe

opinion is solely that of Toko Baker’s and not of the WSU as a whole. The WSU is a non-partisan organisation that does not endorse any political party. We do, however, encourage you to go and look at the various political parties’ policies and to make sure you have your say by voting on Election Day, 26 November 2011.

APPLY FOR THE WSU BOARD!

Two Positions Now Available on the WSU Board As you’ve probably noticed, over the past couple of weeks we’ve been calling for students to apply for the vacancy on the WSU Board created by the departure of Holly Hudson.

At the WSU Board meeting held on 26 May, 2011, the WSU regretfully also accepted the resignation of Daniel Morales, who resigned due to his recent move to Whangarei. Dan had served on the Board since January 2010 and will definitely be missed by WSU Board Members.

What this means for you guys is that there are now two vacancies waiting to be filled. So, are you keen to be involved in the governance of your student union? Interested in making sure your voice is heard? Think you’d be good at representing students’ interests and pushing for their needs to be met? Keen to be involved in events? If you answered yes to these questions, then apply to be on the Waikato Students’ Union Board of Directors!

Applicants should send a CV of no more than four pages, plus a one-page cover letter detailing why there are suitable for the position, to vp@wsu.org.nz before 4pm, 10 June 2011 (for those of you who have been paying attention, that’s right, we’ve extended it by a week due to the creation of a new vacancy). If you have any questions, then feel free to email Charlie at vp@wsu.org.nz.

Directors are concerned with representing students and governing the WSU. As a director, your key job is to put forward the interests of any student who approaches you.

WSU Directors are each assigned a portfolio

based on their interests: a student interested in women’s rights (as Holly was) might take on the Female Welfare Position. However, please do not think that you necessarily have to fulfill the same portfolios that Dan and Holy held In terms of commitment, Directors are generally expected to run and help out at WSU Events. If you want to be involved in the WSU and meet lots of new people, this is the position for you! Directors are part-time positions (about 10 hours per week) and are currently paid approximately $3000 per annum.

15

SAVING OF THE WEEK:

FISH & CHIPS AROUND CAMPUS

Name Big 2 Takeaways Double K East Star Fush & Chups Good World Takeaway Hsin Hsin Jin Wing Mei Wah Ruby Takeaways Silverdale Takeaways Wing Hing

Location Address Hillcrest Shopping Cntr Cnr East St/Peachgrove Rd 243 Cambridge Rd Crn Grey/Brookfield St 316 Grey St 117 Clyde Street 74 Masters Ave 151 Knighton Rd Brooklyn Road (5x Rds) 120 Silverdale Rd Clyde St Shopping Cntr

Phone 856 9886 855 2930 856 6349 856 9185 856 7178 856 3395 856 2123 856 7212 855 2171 856 4378 856 5963

Map A B C D E F G H I J K

Service 4 5 4 4 5 4 2 3 3 4 3

Decor 3 4 5 4 5 3 2 3 3 4 3

Service Dairy Availability New World Next door New World Across Rd Next Door Across the Road Next Door 2 Shops 2 Shops Other side of 5x Roads Next Door On Grey St

Welcome back to our “Student Saving of the Week” page. After a brief break, we’re

to be precise. We then evaluated both the chip quality and the fish quality, alongside

sculpture, often made of ceramic, which is

back to bring you information on how you can save money. It might be something expensive like contents insurance, or it might be something a bit more down-to-earth like where you can get the cheapest fish ‘n’ chips!

In any case, flick to this page each week to see where you could be saving money.

a number of service factors. Our evaluation criteria are detailed below, in case you are interested:

believed to bring good luck to the owner. We thought that it was important to see which fish and chips stores had these cats; perhaps they will bring good luck to your fish and chips?

This week we conducted a review on something that a few of you have been asking for: where is the best fish and chips shop in Hamilton East? There are quite a few of them close to the university area, so Charlie (WSU Vice-President), Tammy (WSU International Students’ Officer) and Mark (Hanger-on) traipsed around the Hamilton East area looking for fish and chips shops to evaluate.

Overall, we found eleven stores to evaluate, as detailed in the tables below.

In each store we bought $2.50 of chips (1 scoop) and then a piece of fish – Hoki,

Service Level: we rated each shop’s customer service out of 5. A “1” for this category would mean that the shop assistant didn’t even talk to us beyond taking our order. A “5” would mean that we received a polite and friendly hello, a thank you and a smile.

Decor: we rated each shop’s customer waiting area, as some people find this important. A “1” would mean that there weren’t even seats to sit on while you waited, while a “5” would mean that there were seats and tables in a well-lit and bright area, with some magazines to read as well.

Dairy Availability: given that fish and chips go well with bread, sauce and coke, we rated how close the nearest dairy is to each fish and chip store. After all, the sauce in fish and chip stores is generally quite horrendously priced, so we thought it was important to see how far you’d have to walk to the dairy if you wanted to pay only slightly horrendous prices instead.

Chinese Welcome Cat: many fish and chips stores seem to have a Maneki Neko, or Chinese Welcome Cat. According to Wikipedia, this cat is a common Japanese

16

Cat No No No No Yes Yes Yes No Yes Yes No

Time 9:07 8:03 8:14 7:10 8:39 6:54 7:22 6:08 5:49 7:03 6:43

Time: we timed how long it took for us to get our order, starting from when we finished paying, and ending when we received our fish and chips. Seeing as we ordered our meals on a Tuesday afternoon, we think that this measure shouldn’t really be affected by business: all of the fish and chip stores were pretty empty at 2-4pm on Tuesday afternoon!

Chips Grams: we weighed how many grams of chips we got for our $2.50. Simple really!

We were quite interested, however, in the wide discrepancies between stores, with Mei Wah being as low as 305 g, and Hsin Hsin being the clear winner at 454 g.

Colour: we evaluated how ‘yellow’ the chips were: were they pale yellow, golden, or too yellow?

Salt: we evaluated whether a ‘good dose’ of salt had been heaped on the chips. Whilst all of the chips did have some salt, we found that some of them did not really have very much. This probably makes them healthier, but also makes them taste not as great (in our opinions, anyway!).

Grams 418 329 368 329 382 454 395 305 397 387 359

Colour Too Yellow Gold Too Yellow Gold Too Yellow Gold Gold Too Yellow Gold Pale Pale

$2.50 Chips Salt Flavour Yes Good No Good Yes Good Yes Good Yes Great Yes Good Yes Good No Limited No Limited No Good Yes Good

Newspaper White Paper 19 May 2011 14 May 2011 White Paper Box 14 May 2011 9 August 2010 2 March 2011 26 Feb 2011 12 March 2011 19 March 2011

Cost $2.50 $2.00 $2.50 $2.50 $2.50 $2.20 $2.30 $2.50 $2.50 $2.20 $2.00

1 Piece of Fish (Hoki) Size Batter:Fish Big Low Big Medium Big Medium Big Low Big Medium Medium Medium Big Medium Medium High Medium Medium Medium High Large Medium

Flavour: the key question here is whether the chips actually had flavour, or simply

Overall, we found that most of the fish and chips shops did quite well. We were a bit

tasted ‘like warm nothingness’. Some of the chips were a bit limited in this regard. We do note, however, that all of the stores did indeed provide hot chips, which were crispy when eaten.

disappointed in the small sizes from some from the stores, but the chips were always hot, and were always crispy. Generally we felt there was very little differentiation between the different chips apart from their weight. Nevertheless, we hope you find the information in the tables useful, and good luck with your own fish and chip trials!

Newspaper: we thought it might be amusing to record the date of the newspaper used to wrap up the chips. You can draw your own conclusions from this...

Fish Size: Using our very measurable categories of ‘big’, ‘medium’, and ‘small’, we assessed how big the piece of fish was that we received from the store.

Batter-Fish Ratio: More important than size, however, is how much of the fish is actually just batter. To that end, we have provided the batter-fish ratio: was it too high, about medium, or quite low? If you like a large amount of batter, you might want to buy your fish from the places we mentioned.

Fish and Batter Taste: We provided some basic comments about how the fish and batter tasted. This is a bit hard to measure, so we simply have told you whether it was ‘oily’, ‘crispy’, ‘generally good’, ‘floury’, or ‘fluffy’. You might need to try the fish for yourself though, to see if it’s what you like!

We used the term “Good” if we thought that the fish tasted generally acceptable without any significant faults or other differentiation factors.

Taste Crispy Good Good Crispy Good Floury Good Floury Oily Oily Fluffy

Name Big 2 Takeaways Double K East Star Fush and Chups Good World Takeaway Hsin Hsin Jin Wing Mei Wah Ruby Takeaways Silverdale Takeaways Wing Hing

As we’ve always said, please don’t bet your life savings on the information in these tables! We’ve done our best to make sure it’s correct, but we may have made a mistake copying down information or just not heard something correctly. Just remember, we were able to get these discounts just by asking about them, so be prepared to ask yourself: you never know what you might be offered!

Also, please bear in mind that these are not all the fish and chips shops in Hamilton East.

There is quite a nice one at the roundabout on Grey Street/Te Aroha Street, which we didn’t cover due its distance from the campus, and there is also another fish and chips store up on Cambridge Road, which we didn’t cover because it is under renovations.

If you found this useful, then please email us at vp@wsu.org.nz with your comments; we’d love to know what you think? Alternatively, if you have some ideas on what you’d like to see us review in these pages, send us an email and we’ll try to make it a reality.

OPEN: 8.30am-4.30pm PHONE: 07 856 9139 WEB: www.wsu.org.nz

17

WSU SPOTLIGHT:

SPORTS

It’s that time of the year again where Saturday Sports are in the full swing of things. While many teams have started and are underway there are still a huge range of opportunities to get involved here at the University of Waikato. There are over 60 clubs here on campus and they want you to join! Email Dianne at clubs@wsu.org.nz if you are keen to be involved!

Recently one of the biggest and most exciting events of university sports occurred, University Games. This is where Universities from all around the country come together to compete in a wide range of sports. This year it was in Auckland and Waikato University sent up a strong team of around 60 people, ranging from touch players to lawn bowlers. According to all involved this was an awesome event where a huge number of people all gathered to have a good time.

It was such an amazing time and a must-do event for all students while at uni: if you didn’t go this year, make sure you sign up in 2012!

Two major university sporting events still coming up this year are Tertiary Challenge and Snow Games. The Tertiary Challenge is a yearly event where all Northern Tertiary Institutes come together to compete in a variety of sports. It’s a fun and social one day event that will be held in Auckland on the 19th of August. Waikato needs to retain the shield so needs everyone who’s keen to come up and have an awesome day with up. Email Ryan (WSU Director in charge of Sports) at ryan@wsu.org.nz for more info!

The University Snow Games are also still coming up with the snow slowly arriving. This is a skiing

and snowboarding event where a group from Waikato will head down to Wanaka around the 27thof August and compete in a range of events and have a good time. So if any keen boarders or skiers out there want to try it out, this is an awesome opportunity to get to meet more people and have a fun week away. For these events coming up there will be more information in Nexus, or look at the University of Waikato website under sports.

Lately the University teams have been doing very well and had some major sports achievements. We would like to say well done to our University Netball team who recently took out the Super 12 Club Competition, the university rowers who won the Hebberley Shield, and it is excellent to see women’s rugby back on campus with a University team doing very well in the Auckland league.

It sounds like most teams have made an excellent start to the season and good luck to all sports teams and individuals competing in upcoming competitions.

The Waikato Students’ Union loves to get behind sports players and people doing extra curricular activities while at University. If you are travelling overseas or need help with funding or equipment to play your particular sport, we are more than happy to help you out and have a number of grants that students can apply for. If you want more information about these grants, joining a club or have any inquiries then you should come in the WSU, or have a look on the Waikato University Website or contact Ryan at ryan@wsu.org.nz We’re all busy and especially this time of year with uni work piling up, but remember there’s always time for sports! After all, with a healthy body comes a healthy mind!

18

PICTURE LOG Uni Games

2011

Are you interested in being a member of the WSU Board of Directors?

There are currently 2 vacancies on the WSU Board, which will be filled by appointment.

If you are interested in applying, send you CV and a one-page cover letter to Charlie at vp@wsu.org.nz Applications close 10 June, 2011

19

Russell Norman, for those of you with your

Nexus: Given that the government is having

Nexus: Do you believe that the free trade

heads in the sand, is the second Male CoLeader of the New Zealand Green Party, alongside the Female Co-Leader, Metiria Turei. From his start as an organic farmer through to his current position as co-leader of the greens, Russell has been committed to Aotearoa and to preserving our clean green image.

financial issues with the deficit problems that they’ve got, how would this be financed?

agreement with China was an example of that?

Russell Norman: Our approach has been that we can’t just look at spending cuts, which National’s approach has been. They’re proposing spending cuts and increased borrowing. Labour is proposing increased borrowing. Greens are proposing we reduce borrowing and match it by increased revenue.

The areas we’ve identified for increased revenue is firstly around the targeted ‘earthquake levy’ to pay for the rebuild of Christchurch, which will be about a billion dollars a year for 5 years or so. The second is capital gains tax excluding the family home. If you look at the latest budget figures in the last nine months, there’s been 800 million dollars spent on subsidizing greenhouse pollution.

We think it’s stupid to subsidize green house pollution, so there’s another 800 million.

Russell Norman: It certainly was when you look at the investment clauses within the free trade agreement with China. It does make it harder for NZ to regulate. For example, if we had Chinese dairy companies in NZ, it would be harder for us to pass regulations to protect the environment from the downstream effects of intensive dairy. It’s also true that the dairy we’re selling to China at the moment, we were going to sell it anyway. It’s got nothing to do with the free trade agreement. The Chinese are desperate for safe dairy food for infant formula, particularly after the melamine disaster there. Those who say that the free trade agreement was the reason we increased the amount of dairy going into China, are completely wrong, because its actually got nothing to do with the free trade agreement.

Terry and Daniel from Contact sat down with Mr Norman in the studio and were treated to a candid and unforgiving series of answers in a world where politicians nod and smile, more than they talk.

Nexus approves.

Nexus: The Green Party has a policy of free tertiary education; do you believe this would be positive for the economy?

Russell Norman: Our policy is to slowly, over time, reduce fees, though obviously it’s going to be bound by fiscal conditions. The government’s books are in a bit of trouble.

The advantage of having a lot of people with access to education is that it means that you get much high levels of education. That is essential for the economy. It also means that you don’t have a whole bunch of people with high levels of debt, coming straight out of the university. Levels of debt create more problems when these young people first enter the workforce, and makes it harder for them to get their first house amongst other things.

Having high levels of debt when students first come out of university is something I think has become an economic problem.

20

It’s all about the melamine disaster.

Nexus: Should New Zealand be engaging in free trade agreements?

Russell Norman: The Greens are very supportive of trade, and we’re very happy to have consistent international agreements around it. The issue is the kind of trade agreements we’re signing, which basically tie the hands of our government. The way they sign up trade agreements means it becomes harder and harder for governments to regulate, to protect the environment, to look after people. Successful National governments have signed trade treaties that make it harder and harder for governments to regulate, to protect the environment, to look after people, and we think that’s wrong.

Nexus: With the Closer Economic Relations agreement with Australia, would you say that is one that ties the hands of governments, or is that one that hasn’t been doing as much of that?

Russell Norman: The CER agreement with Australia is a far more permissive agreement than the NZ-China agreement because of the absence of investor state dispute mechanisms. Because the Chinese-NZ treaty has investor state dispute mechanisms which mean that corporations can sue governments if they don’t like what governments are doing whereas the CER agreement with Australia doesn’t have kind of mechanism in it.

Nexus: Is the Government doing the right thing with the highways of national significance that they seem to be pushing as a strong policy at the moment?

Russell Norman: No!

“we can’t just look at spending cuts, which National’s approach has been. They’re proposing spending cuts and increased borrowing. Labour is proposing increased borrowing. Greens are proposing we reduce borrowing and match it by increased revenue.”

Nexus: Should there be more emphasis on public transport rather than these highways?

Russell Norman: Yes. The government has decided that these roads are going to be rolled out all over the country, which is just surreal. At a time of record high oil prices, the government has decided that they want to increase the dependency of NZ on imported oil. There’s kind of like a radical disconnect of what’s happening with oil prices in the government’s transport policy, and it is really quite weird. It feels like we’re back in the 1950s. Now, oil is fantastically expensive and it’s only going to get more expensive. The International Energy Agency (the body that lots of government’s pay money to predict what’s going to happen with oil) is saying that prices are going to get higher and higher.

What on earth is the government thinking?

Nexus: Maybe that could be mitigated on their part by allowing oil exploration in NZ and off the cost of NZ. If this is going to go ahead as it is now what does the Green Party want to do with that?

Russell Norman: Well, the first thing to say is regardless of what oil we find, it’s not going to change the price of oil at the petrol pump, because the price of oil at the petrol pump is set by the international price of oil. Even the fact that we export oil currently from the Taranaki fields doesn’t mean that we get oil any cheaper in NZ. Secondly, it’s true that as the price of oil goes up and up as the oil companies get more and more desperate to find it. There hasn’t been a single year since 1983 where we have discovered more oil than we’ve consumed, so there is a desperate search for more oil, and so we’re going into more and more extreme locations in order to do it. In NZ we’re talking about doing some very deep water exploration. Let’s remember the company that was involved with the Deepwater Horizon disaster in the Gulf of Mexico is now currently exploring in water that is about as deep, off the South Island, and is going to look at drilling a well later this year. If that well gets out of control, and with the hindsight of the experience at Deepwater

Horizon, it is very, very hard to turn it off again. That’s why we’ve got real concerns about deep water oil well drilling.

Nexus: Given the price of petrol, should the Government be doing something to adjust this?

Russell Norman: We think the government should re-prioritise where it spends its transport money. We need to spend the money on alternatives to oil dependency.

If you’re looking at freight, that means moving freight off the road (where it’s highly subsidized), and moving it on to rail and sea freight, which has much lower oil use per ton per kilometer.

When you are looking at our urban centres; investing heavily in public transport, walking and cycling, and making sure we have good urban design. Making it safe for cycling would be great. The thing about cycling is that it’s fantastic but they are dangers around it, where the roads aren’t designed properly and so forth. There are heaps of things we can do with it. They’re going to spend $10 billion over the next decade on new motorways.

Imagine if we invested that much money in public transport, walking and cycling, it would revolutionise the alternatives.

Nexus: A lot of things you mention, and a lot of the infrastructure spending, is quite long term. We might not see a benefit for ten or twenty years. Is this just a case of having to suck it up?

Russell Norman: It depends which one it is. I’d say that the infrastructure spending the government’s throwing at motorways at the moment is something that we’re just going to regret.

I often think that Michael Joseph Savage had his memorial at Bastion Point, while Steven Joyce and Michael Cullen, their memorials are going to be these giant tarmac road surfaces all around the country. We will look at them as we’re all crammed onto buses and trains (we won’t be able to drive because we can’t afford oil) and we’ll go: ‘Ohhh look there’s the memorial for Steven Joyce. Thank you very much’. I just think we’re making the wrong infrastructure choices when it comes to transport. There are other infrastructure things that I think we’re doing which are probably the right things to do: Some of the electricity upgrades and the transmission lines. We need to make some investments in sewerage around NZ. There is going be a delay before we see the benefit from the good stuff.

21

“If you don’t vote, you have to take what you get” Te Ururoa Flavell is the MP for the Maori Parliamentray seat of Waiariki, which stretches from Turangi to Waihi and encompasses Taupo, Ruatoki, Whakatane and Tauranga. We were lucky enough to get him for a half hour last week and put the hard questions to him.

Nexus: What got you into politics?

Te Ururoa Flavell: Well I didn’t have any desire to go into politics to be truthful; the only reason was Tariana Turia crossing the floor after the Seabed and Foreshore march, which I was involved in the organisation of. She left Labour and needed to organise a party to go under the banner of for the byelection and so a group of us came together to develop the party infrastructure and the name and everything else like that so I was basically involved with the party from day one. The process that we set ourselves was that 50 people would nominate you. So I didn’t nominate myself, 50 people put their names up. It was more that I tripped into it as opposed to I wanted to go into it.

Nexus: What do you see as the big fights for the Maori party coming up?

Te Ururoa Flavell: We actually haven’t got down to that stage as yet. It is different when you’re in opposition; all you do is challenge everything, just give it heaps and slam the Government on whatever comes up, no matter what. When you’re in Government, then you’re given the opportunity is to try and find some commonality of the things that 22

you can win. As in any negotiation, you put up a big end picture but know full well you’ll probably have to fall back on some point or other to find a middle ground that everybody can live with, the major party in particular.

I think people can recognise that the only way you can make change in parliament is to be in a relationship with the governing party, whether that is National or Labour.

Under MMP that’s the only way you can make change and the facts of the matter.

Our position as a coalition party is quite important because we can sit next to National and that’s the only way to make gains like those we got from the Budget and through our ministries. We’ve had experience in opposition and know full well you get zip.

We’ve been working through the Seabed and Foreshore legislation and also have on the table a Constitutional Review. At the moment, right here and now I can say that the key issues are about protecting the vulnerable and disadvantaged and at the same time trying to plan for the future. A lot of our concerns are in education, right through from early childhood to literacy and numeracy and then the tertiary sector and making sure universities don’t close the door to students who want to take the opportunity to be educated.

Nexus: There were a few things in the budget recently about cutting off certain loan allowances to the over 55s. Do you have a stand on that?

Te Ururoa Flavell: We didn’t discuss it too much, but we can understand the motivation.

I think that there is a need to cut off some of the things because we got stories from the ministry. This is a straight example so it’s not about being discriminatory in any way, but the view was that there were a number of people of Chinese background who were coming to New Zealand and figuring out that they could actually get more money as a student. Over 55s have been claiming that money and not actually moving into study for the purposes of education, but for the purpose of maintaining a family. So clearly there are some issues, but at the same time we shouldn’t be closing these opportunities off to particularly Maori who are moving into education. It’s about trying to find a balance in how you stop those manipulations of the system.

Nexus: Do you have any words of wisdom to pass on to the students here at Waikato?

Te Ururoa Flavell: In my moving around the thing I’m shocked by is the lack of understanding about the political process by students. It’s important to know about how government works because every day in parliament we make laws that affect everybody’s lives on a daily basis. If you don’t understand it you can’t question what happens and that brings into question the value of your vote. A large number of young people are not even registered to vote and that’s a major concern. If you don’t vote, you have to take what you get.

23

Current students – to add undergraduate papers that start between now and the end of 2011, you must

apply by 10 June to guarantee your place.

Please note, this doesn’t apply to current students who are adding papers at postgraduate level.

Freephone 0800 WAIKATO or visit www.waikato.ac.nz

24

A QUICK ONE-TWO LEFT JAB WITH MISS COGSWELL

RIGHT CROSS WITH MR LETCHER

Fun fact from the Finance Minister: “In 2008, this Government was elected to build a more prosperous and ambitious New Zealand”.

Should he really be reminding us of this before revealing his Government’s namby-pamby Budget? Nothing promising emerged from Budget Day 2011 except the revelation that to our government, promises mean nothing. Our Prime Minister seems mildly schizophrenic, Dr. Jekyll for the camera but Mr. Hyde in the House.

This year the National Party has ran with a zero budget, meaning that they spend the same amount of money they did last year. There is only one issue with this plan. Last year they spent far too much money. Truth be told, New Zealand has been spending too much money since the days of that wicked witch Helen Clark. 2005 saw New Zealand’s spending increase by 42% in real terms, spurred on by a lollie scramble of unsustainable vote buying election promises such as

The media mogul promised the earth but now he wants to take it away from under us.

interest free student loans and working for families.

The emptiness of the Budget concerns me. Funding for mining plans featured last year as an initiative to generate revenue. Exploration has not ended yet and I fear that despite the public outrage, this issue remains under the table. To even mention mineral exploitation at this stage of the game would be suicide but surely they have some kind of plan. We need a strategy to stabilise the economy amidst this unstable world.

Excuses were everywhere, from the never-ending effects of the global financial crisis to the massive impact of the Canterbury earthquakes but quite frankly I think our Government could’ve done a little better.

You can’t hide behind a collapsed city. A serious deficiency in vision is to blame but our Prime Minister doesn’t have the balls to admit this.

He’s not a big fan of honesty or transparency.

In the 2009 Budget National paraded their ‘no cuts to the student loan scheme, Working for Families or National Superannuation’ propaganda. Now it’s a different story with cuts coming left, right and centre. Our National Government has lost sight of New Zealand as a whole.

John Key’s “iPad Government” looks down on those around them, yet is doing nothing for the plight of the middle class. Most New Zealanders work their arses off yet still can’t afford such luxuries, while the wealthy whinge about welfare. According to them these cuts are OK because they only affect those on the higher end of the welfare scale. Apparently we should applaud our generous Government for not further disheartening the desperate.

Bill English claims that the previous budgets helped to “sustain economic activity and support jobs, and protect the most vulnerable New Zealanders”. Did student survival even cross their minds? We’ve taken a critical hit with 2010 bringing tax to 15% but no adjustments to Studylink payments. If the Government doesn’t look after students now, future ambition and prosperity will falter.

These two electoral bribes are what I believe is holding New Zealand back economically. I may be preaching to the wrong crowd here, but interest free student loans are the devil. Because we pay back the exact amount we borrow without any interest, inflation slowly erodes the value of that figure. I would have preferred to see a sensible policy put in place that adds interest to student loans, but only at the rate of inflation. In real terms we would pay back a fair figure. And Working for Families? It is essentially middle class welfare.

I guess the point that I’m trying to make here is, thank god there were no electoral bribes this year. Given that its election year, this was a real surprise. Electoral bribes hurt New Zealand. Could it be that we actually have an economically savvy government? In 2008 Treasury predicted over a decade of deficits, continuing beyond 2023.

Now, despite two earthquakes, the government expects to return to surplus in 2014. In addition to this, the government has made a strong commitment to Christchurch – contributing $8.8 billion to the recovery.

This has been a sensible budget, for tough times. I would hate to see what Phil Goff would have done. He claims this is the worst budget in 27 years. I guess he’s forgotten about the 9 budgets Labour put out during their last government that saw interest rates more than double.

The reduction of interest rates under this National government has profound effects for students, who will be looking to buy their first homes in the next few years. On a mortgage of $200,000, which is quite small might I add, New Zealanders are now paying $10,000 less interest per year. That’s $200 per week. That is something National can be proud of.

The last point I would like to make regarding this year’s budget is that although the socialists may not like it, Standard & Poors do. They have given this budget the tick allowing us to avoid a dreaded credit rating downgrade that after the Christchurch earthquake was though inevitable. This means New Zealand is still seen as a sound investment and we can continue to enjoy low interest rates on our debt, helping it to disappear faster.

25

DANIEL FARRELL COMMEMORATIVE

Puzzle Page

Brought to you by Mighty Strong Friends of Nexus; Event Cinemas and Frozen Coke Smugglers

Last week of semester, yo! So, this week we be talking about Politics! There are a bunch of parties and a bunch of their MPs in the Word Find. To make it fair, there are three people to each party, unless they are so useless that they only have one influential person. If you are feeling political on a Friday afternoon around about 1:30pm, you should definitely have a listen to Squirrel on Contact 88.1FM. Enough blatant plugs. Good luck for your exams, and have a good break. Then come back and be destroyed by the hell that is university life.

THE BIG BAD wordFIND

the wORDS ACT ANNETTE KING CATHERINE DELAHUNTY DAVID BENNETT DON BRASH GREEN PARTY HEATHER ROY HONE HARAWIRA JOHN KEY MANA PARTY MAORI PARTY METIRIA TUREI NEW ZEALAND FIRST NEW ZEALAND LABOUR PARTY NEW ZEALAND NATIONAL PARTY PETER DUNNE PHIL GOFF PITA SHARPLES RODNEY HYDE RUSSELL NORMAN TARIANA TURIA TE URUROA FLAVELL TIM MACINDOE TREVOR MALLARD

WHAT TO DO The Furious Puzzle Page

(seriously, it’s pretty darn cross) Brought to you by the strong mind of Event Cinemas, in both Chartwell and Centreplace flavours! Mmmmm, delicious frozen coke!

Be warned, this is the most difficult puzzle page ever!

26

SUDOKU TIME

UNITED FUTURE WINSTON PETERS

NEXUS. FOOD. LOVE. WITH DEE Ahh... the last week of the semester. I’m not sure about you, but I still have over half a dozen pieces of assignment and exams left to do over the next few weeks, even though it feels like it’s all wrapping up. It’s the last couple of days of autumn too, and this week marks the beginning of winter, not that it doesn’t already feel like it. It is dark early, it is cold most of the time, and at least one day last week, I’m sure the fog didn’t lift all day (or at least it seemed that way).

At my flat, with there being six of us, we each take a turn to cook one night a week. In the week just been I ended up making a bit of desert with some leftover ingredients, and it’s had me thinking of fun, easy, two course meals. I ended up whipping one up at my parent’s house when I went to visit... mostly so I could spend their money on ingredients instead of mine.

This week, I decided rather than harping on about whatever is going on, I’m going to tell you what I did for that two course meal.

Before I finish for this semester, if there are any recipes you would like me to work on, or any cooking questions you have, send me an email to food@nexusmag. co.nz and I will see what I can whip up for B Semester. And until then, have fun, be good.

MAIN: OPEN STEAK SANDWICH & ROAST POTATOES Ingredients: Four potatoes A good loaf of bread A couple of pieces of steak Salad ingredients (lettuce, tomato, cucumber, avocado) 1. Clean, cut and cook your potatoes in the oven at 180 degrees until you could stick a fork through one easily. I normally try and cut them up quite small to make them cook a little quicker. Pro-tip: Don’t turn them till they are mostly cooked, as it will help them to crunch up a bit. To stop them sticking to the pan, cook them on some baking paper.

2. Cook the steak in a hot frying pan until it is brown, one side at a time. Like the potatoes, don’t flip until it is nice and browned on the first side. Take it out of the pan and rest it for a 3-5 minutes, and then slice it into strips.

3. Toast the bread a little, and if you like, but some butter, mayo or steak sauce onto the toast.

4. Prepare the salad ingredients.

5. Put the sandwich together, with bread on one side. Makes it seem a little more classy. If you want two slices of bread, put two on your plate, and stack it up high. I normally put the steak on top, which again makes it look a little more pro. Put the roast potatoes on the side, and serve it up.

DESSERT: CHOCOLATE CHIP MUFFINS Hint - I cooked these earlier in the day, and then warmed them up in the oven for a few minutes.

Ingredients: 2 cups flour 1/2 cup caster sugar (but normal white sugar works fine) 3 teaspoons baking powder 1/2 teaspoon salt 3/4 cup milk 1/3 cup vegetable oil 1 egg 1 cup chocolate chips 3 tablespoons white sugar 2 tablespoons brown sugar

1. Heat oven to 200 degrees C. Put liners into a muffin tin.This recipe will make 12 muffins.

2. In a bowl, mix together the flour, 1/2 cup sugar, baking powder, chocolate chips, and salt; mix well.

3. In a separate bowl, combine milk, oil and egg; mix this together really well.

4. Add dry ingredients all at once; stir just until dry ingredients are moistened (batter will be a little lumpy.)

5. Fill cups 2/3 full. Sprinkle tops of muffins before baking with a combination of 3 tablespoons sugar and 2 tablespoon brown sugar.

6. Bake for 20 to 25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Let them cool down for a minute before taking them out of the muffin tray.

FASHIONISTAS!

WITH THE RT. HON. LADY HAYNS

THE CARE BEARS

WITH THE RT. HON. SHARE BEAR AND THE RT. HON. LOVE-A-LOT BEAR.

One of my favourite things about winter is the fashion. I know it’s cold and wet and pretty miserable outside but it doesn’t mean your outside has to look miserable.

Dear Nexus Carebears Me and my girlfriend live at opposite ends of the country (she’s in Dunedin and I’m in Hamilton) we’re pretty committed to each other but I recently found out she cheated on me. I don’t know

If you haven’t already noticed, this winter is pretty girly and effortless looking. I’ve noticed that texture is key in so many styles, neutral colours are gorgeous for day wear and they allow you to mix and match your wardrobe easily, less is more, and there are so many styles that are hot right now; it’s easy to find something you will like.

what to do?

Today I’m going to write about two of my favourite things; shoes and jerseys.

What should you be putting on your tootsies? Boots; Boots of all sizes, shapes and styles please. Wedge boots, suede boots, leather boots, knee high boots(in a fashionable not a sluzzy way, there’s a significant difference), ankle boots, boots with heels, flat boots, boots with the fur (haha yes the fur), boots that tie up with laces and boots that zip.

Share Bear says: It all depends on a lot of things. How long have you been together?

Are you both in your first or last year of uni? How often do you get to physically see each other (Not just Skype or txt). Was it her who confessed to cheating? Or did you find out through a friend? These are all questions that dictate what answer/advice I give you. However I will assume the worst situation and hope you can gather some advice.

Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship. Your girlfriend has broken this. If you found out about the cheating through a friend, she clearly doesn’t feel guilty enough about it to tell you personally. If she told you, she clearly cares about you, wants to make things work.

Ballet flats are still lovely, just go for a nicer pair than what you would find at cheap places like cotton on. Try the styles that have a proper sturdy sole on them as they’ll last much longer, and try out different fabrics and colours; as I said before suede is gorgeous this winter and you’ll find colours an easy way to make your outfit ‘pop’ a little, especially if your wardrobe is fairly neutral.

If you see each other regularly enough, talk often enough then perhaps it can work. Obviously intimacy is something that she requires and you both need to be sure that you can deal without it when you are apart.

What do you put on the rest of your body? Well, cover it in jerseys obviously. Oversized jerseys are the casual queen of winter, you can honestly not go wrong and they can be dressed up or down depending on what accessories you put with it.

Love-a-lot Bear says: I think Share Bear has some excellent advice, not much for me to say but I do have one or two things.

Leggings; an outfit where they have some use, and boots or flat shoes will give you a casual day time look, whereas stockings; the sheer kind paired with heels or heeled boots will give you a evening look for a date, or depending on the jersey; town. The other day I spotted a girl in class wearing the coolest jersey I’ve seen in a long time; black with sparkly silver streaks through it, it was definitely one to switch into an evening look.

Alright, now what colours should you go for? This season it’s all about rich berry colours, light pinks, and neutrals like beige, cream, black and brown.

28

I hope what I have provided is good enough. Good Luck!

First of all; I think there must have been an issue already, at least on her part, for her to feel the need to cheat on you. I think if you feel like you could forgive her and work through it then it should be an option, but you need to realise that it’s going to take a lot of time, effort, patience, and trust (rebuilding it) to fix your relationship.

On the other hand I am so pessimistic about long distance I am inclined to say screw it, break up and find someone awesome a bit closer to home. I really think long distance only works if it’s for a set amount of time; say you knew one of you would be moving to be with the other in five months, and if you can talk and see each other at least once a month. Without that I have little hope of it ever working.

CAFES: LIKE A BOSS

WITH THE RT. HON. MRS MATTHEWS

Sugar Bowl Cafe, 150 Maeroa Rd, Hamilton.

We were brunching here at the advice of a friend. Since I had given a mediocre review to two of his other favourites, he was sure it couldn’t be three out of three. He’s going to be pissed, because dining there yesterday has to have been one of my worst cafe experiences in memory.

From the moment we arrived I had a bad feeling, Sad-face McGee was moping about clearing tables and no amount of eye contact, smiles or ‘thanks’ were going to illicit a response of any form from him. We sat outside because it was smoky inside and quite frankly because there were less staff milling about. Just being around them made us feel like we were inconveniencing them; not one single staff member smiled at us or greeted us, even after my exaggerated attempts to gain eye contact, smile and thank them. I was fairly tempted to walk out after standing at the counter un-served and unacknowledged for a couple of minutes, but I’d heard amazing things about the food so honestly was just curious to see if it somehow balanced out the abhorrent service.

Well when our food finally came out at least 40 minutes later, (after my friend’s coffee had taken around 20 minutes) and while the cafe wasn’t overly busy, it was horribly disappointing. The eggs, although they tasted good, looked shabby and came with soggy five grain which hadn’t been buttered. The sausage which was of the cheap supermarket variety and the potato ‘koftas’ had been thrown in a deep fryer, were burnt, and were terribly salty. This was confirmed when my friends meal came out and her ‘koftas’ were a completely different colour. She also agreed that it was all a bit salty.

Needless to say I wasn’t overly motivated to spend another dollar there, to sample their coffee, which had been my original plan; especially after my friend was not overly enamoured with hers.

I have heard amazing things about this cafe and I am left dumbfounded as to how our visit could have been so wildly different to the reviews that I’ve been subjected to. Out of reviewer curiousity I actually want to go back with my friend who raves about the place, to see whose scenario plays out. But I’m torn by the fact that I sincerely do not want to give those guys another cent of my money. Horrible.

WORDS OF WISDOM

WITH THE RT. HON. MR MINTY FISH

In an age where everybody is trying to fight the big fights, I think it’s time I gave you help with the biggest terrorists of all time. Curtain cracks. Those are what are wrong with the world today.

You’re in bed; basically in Heaven. You’re so cosy you could float out the flippin’ window and that’s when you look up: there’s a fucking gap between your curtains. What do you do? Sure. You could get up and shut it but why don’t you just pour ice on your bed and kick small children while you’re at it. Dick. No, what you need is a selection of crafty methods to shut said curtain so that you can go back to those sweet sweet dreams of yours. And believe me; they will be the sweetest of dreams.

1) The Scavenge: I’m going to suggest that you role play these techniques to get them down. Don’t bother doing fire drills. The likelihood of a fire is miniscule, but a curtain crack? Bitches be happening daily. Lie back on your bed in the dark and writhe. Just spazz out and see what’s in arms reach. Lava lamp? Coat hanger?

Friday morning bucket? Grab anything and everything you can. You now have two options. Either throw them at the curtain crack until it surrenders or link them together in some kind of chain and just hustle.

Hit that bitch till it closes. There we are. Done.

2) The Stretch: No matter how far away your curtains are from your bed, if you get up, the night monsters WILL get you. Plank, stretch, grab. You can keep up the illusion of still being cosy in bed as long as you are still perched in whatever awkward position on the corner of your mattress. If your feet touch the floor, you have entered the ‘I am awake’ zone.

3) The Adrenalin Junkie: This is not for the faint hearted. Do not attempt if your room is a hobo pit or if you had an orgy and there are still togas/naked people on the floor. You do have the option of actually getting up and closing it but like I said, last resort.

At the end of the day, haters gon’ hate. If none of these options are classy enough for you then that’s cool. Just know that if you live in Ham East, an innocent curtain crack only means one thing. Rapists are creeping. For real.

29

RANGATAHI IN THE WORKPLACE

MAKING LIVING CHEAPER

YWRC AGM YWRC empowering Young People since 1993 because knowing your rights aids you to develop and maintain positive employment experiences.

This week we take a look at saving money on the water bill.

YOUNG WORKERS’ RESOURCE CENTRE

The Young Workers’ Resource Centre (YWRC) is a community organisation with the aim to empower young people hence we are here to pragmatically benefit you. You may have come across YWRC before at high school, or in the community; we give workshops and unit standard delivery to Waikato secondary schools, tertiary institutions, youth groups and community organisations about employment relations. We also have a drop in centre and office hours (CAB office 1-2 every Wednesday) where you can ask us questions about employment and seek free advice/ a referral service.

Places such as the Department of Labour can only outline a workers minimum rights, and generally unions can only support union members; whereas the YWRC can advise, refer and where needed support a young person with employment queries.

The YWRC AGM is on the 27th of June at 6.00pm, this is your opportunity to get involved with our community organisation. The YWRC is looking for new committee members to provide guidance, a new perspective and enthusiasm to the committee.

Getting involved with the YWRC will bulk up your CV, help you build networks and you will be part of making a positive impact on the community you live in.

For further information please contact Kylie, 07 834 7124, 0211 828 710 or email kylie@ywrc.org.nz.

WITH THE RT. HON. HONEST MATT

Only flush when needed.

I’ve said it before and ill say it again “If its yellow, let it mellow. If it’s brown, flush it down”. It’s a vulgar topic but in all honesty you’re just wasting water if you don’t really need to flush.

Shower with a friend.

You can save water and probably have sex as well. Win, Win! Sure this may be awkward for flats that aren’t gay but if you have a strong personality and are truly comfortable with your sexuality this shouldn’t be an issue. It’s just one man washing another man’s back. My mate Fighty McGightson (who served three to five) said they employed this practice all the time at Waikeria and I’m yet to see anyone accuse him of homosexuality. Its 2011, you hatemonger!

Use your neighbour’s water.

If you’re flatting next to another bunch of youthful ruffians then you can probably use their hose. Most likely you get on the sauce with them so you guys aren’t against sharing a few resources for the betterment of neighbourly harmony. If you don’t really know them there’s a good chance you can just sneak over and have a shower /fill up a paddling pool / some containers when they are asleep/hungover.

Most students wake up at the crack of noon so you have plenty of time to get over there and use some water. No one’s going to get out of bed at 9.30am after destroying 27 candy alcypops to see who’s using their shower. If you have the kahunas definitely try this. I mean what’s the worst that can happen? An early morning fist fight? Moments like those make a man! Character building at its finest.

If you’re living next to Mr and Mrs. Bernstein, a lovely pair of pensioners, then make sure you use their water as well. They will most likely be inside most the time watching Emmerdale so you will have plenty of opportunities to use their hose. As far as potential fist fights over water goes? No worries! He’s 75 with two bad hips, bad sight and terrible hearing. All moneys on you champ. If you’re stealing water from them though make sure to turn the hose off properly. They will smell a rat if you don’t. Old people thrive on life’s seemingly minor details.

Get your H Card for only $25 today from hcard.co.nz Check out our deals at hcard.co.nz/deals

30

OUT AND ABOUT

WITH THE RT. HON. SUZY SUNSHINE

POST-RAD

WITH THE RT. HON. BLAIR MUNRO

Many people have a lot of misconceptions about bisexuality or in fact any type of sexuality that isn’t culturally defined as normal. One of the biggest misconceptions that I seem to encounter from both homosexuals and heterosexuals would be that bisexuals are greedy,

People tell you that power is everything. Every conflict comes back to either money or power, and the only reason people want money is so they can buy influence. The problem is, when you have power, what do you do with it? Bush declared war, Hitler declared war, Clinton got his

slutty and incapable of being monogamous; not unlike a communal bicycle. While everyone seems to know a stereotypical “bisexual bicycle” isn’t it because of their reputation of being a bike that they are so well known? A few well known individuals do not represent an entire sexuality. A heterosexual male might be attracted to a large percentage of the world’s adult women but they are still capable of committing to a single partner. This goes for bisexuals as well, while they are attracted to both men and woman this doesn’t stop them from also being capable of committing to a single partner.

dick sucked.

Another misconception that I have come across, while not as common these days, is that nobody is bisexual. Some homosexual people regarded bisexuals as if they were homosexuals but just not ready to come completely out of the closet and that they are just going through a phase. While this maybe and often is true of some people, others sincerely regard themselves to be permanently bisexual throughout their adult life. Now days the majority of homosexual and queer friendly groups have accepted bisexuality as a separate and legitimate sexual orientation.

To be perfectly honest, I think Clinton had the right idea. Not only because fewer people were killed during war as a result of his decisions, but also because his abuse of power didn’t reinforce negative racist stereotypes. The Head of State getting head didn’t end in persecution of Islamic residents, as far as I’m aware.

In fact, I’m pretty sure the only reason Bush went to war at all is because Laura Bush wouldn’t wrap lip. All resolve to do pretty much anything disappears beneath the might of fellatio. If Laura Bush had just put out a little, Old Dubya might have postponed the war indefinitely.

Clinton however, used his presidential pulling power to persuade his pretty personal assistant to pout and pump penis, which I think was the best possible course of action. What’s the point of influence if you can’t use it to get your rocks off? Making love is preferable to making war, right?

My last misconception is that bisexuals are equally attracted to both

Of course, there’s the ethical consideration of using a position of

genders. Many people seem to think that this is a requirement of being bisexual. This is defiantly not true in fact there was even a scale called the Kinsey scale developed during a study of sexual behaviour with 0 meaning heterosexual and 6 being homosexual with numbers 1 through 5 all indicating differing attractions of bisexuality. The study shows that many bisexuals identify themselves as a 1 or 2 (meaning attracted to members of the opposite sex) or 4 or 5(attracted to members of the same sex). Most bisexuals, although attracted to both man and women, have a real preference.

influence to coerce an underling into playing your pants-bugle. Where does one draw the line? If you’re the leader of a nation, and your wife happens to be Hillary Clinton, then to have a lady in her thirties lick your love pump should be fine. There’s a little leeway when you’re in political office. Our New Zealand politicians should start taking a hint here, and try and fuck us in private rather than in public, by the way.

While this is probably very obvious to some people and others really just don’t care about a person’s sexual preference I hope that the next time you discover someone is bisexual you think twice before immediately labelling them a bisexual bike.

But if you’re the manager of a petrol station or fast food restaurant, or the owner of a dairy, or a teacher, then you should just keep it in your pants. What little power and influence you have should be used for more constructive ends than getting your digits wet.

There are businesses to expand, minds to expand, stomachs to expand.

Vasocongestion of your nether-regions need not occur. Although, who am I to judge? As long as nobody finds out, what harm can it do?

Tutor? But I hardly know her!

31

HOROSCOPES

WITH THE RT. HON. MADAM KERBS

DIARY OF A RAVER

WITH THE RT. HON. RAVER

Taurus: April 21 – May 21 It’s business as usual this week. Steer clear of falling objects, slippery floors and menacing longboard posses.

Gemini: May 22 – June 21 This week you’ll lock eyes with your one true love. You’ll kiss, the world will fall away, and you’ll spiral off into space, frozen together forever in the infinite void.

Cancer: June 22 – July 23 This week you’ll make eyes across the room enough times to be officially deemed ‘unsavoury’.

Leo: July 24 – Aug 23 Your addiction to Jersey Shore will reach strange and sexy new heights this week, what with that recurring dream where Pauly D lovingly chases you through an underwater forest and all.

Virgo: Aug24 – Sep 23 Love comes in all shapes and sizes. If love ‘aint picky, why are you?

Libra: Sep 24 – Oct 23 Love not only comes in all shapes and sizes, it also comes out of the bushes at 3am, shrieking and waving its genitalia at you on Clyde Street. This is Mercury’s fault.

Scorpio: Oct 24 – Nov 22 This week you’ll find that “oh, it just popped up in my newsfeed” no longer diffuses awkward situations.

Sagittarius: Nov 23 – Dec 21 “Oh hey, you just popped up in ‘people you might know’…” won’t fly either. Creep.

Hamilton has long been known as a place where people don’t care about their appearance and in particular what we wear. Our Auckland counterparts wear what we wear out to town on a daily basis; and a night out for them would be our version of being dressed up to the nines. The introduction of many a new dress code here in Hamilton is creating a shift towards tidier appearances and better dressed individuals, a shift for the better. However these new changes have been met with a lot of resistance from many.

A regular night out for me includes seeing various girls’ bits and pieces; and this is definitely not by choice. Many girls in Hamilton often wear clothes reminiscent of a cheap hooker, wearing skirts as short as belts; and tops with their boobs falling out. Catching the odd glimpse of a boob or butt really isn’t pretty and I imagined a change in wardrobe would occur to include jeans and pants with the drop in temperature and extreme frosts. However this is not the case and the mini-dress is still out in full force.

“ Catching the odd glimpse of a boob or butt really isn’t pretty and I imagined a change in wardrobe would occur to include jeans and pants with the drop in temperature and extreme frosts. However this is not the case and the mini-dress is still out in full force.”

Capricorn: Dec 22 – Jan 20 This week in your flat you’ll discover that “wash as you go” has now become the standard, leading to the introduction of the slightly risky “rinse and hope”.

Aquarius: Jan 21 – Feb 19 With Mars now in your domestic zone, dinner standards reach a new low this week. Improve things by wearing a tricorne hat, waving a bell, and bellowing “ye olde toaste!” at your meal.

Pisces: Feb 20 – Mar 20 As Venus crosses Jupiter, you’ll find yourself in possibly the most embarrassing situation of your life. Thankfully the ground will - on this particular occasion - actually open up and swallow you.

Aries: Mar 21 – Apr 20 Every day this week you will brave the morning chill in a jacket, only to find the temperatures soaring to brain-steaming heights at midday, leaving you with a stupid jacket to carry around like a stupid asshole. Don’t be a fool, tie it around your waist like it’s the 90’s.

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Skate shoes and basketball singlets, is a combination I see too often on guys out in town. This look should be reserved for when you are playing sport and definitely isn’t what you wear if you want to attract girls, in fact it will do just the opposite. A guy in a nice shirt, jeans and tidy shoes is much more attractive and will garner a second look from most girls. Girls spend hours getting ready to go out to town doing their hair and make-up and I don’t think it’s a big ask to expect a nice shirt.

If you make more effort in what you wear and how you look, you’re more likely to attract the kind of attention you want. Girls, put on some more clothes, a girl shivering is unattractive. And guys, all you need to do is put on a shirt. And if you really want to impress, take a leaf out of the book from our friends up the road.

AUTEUR HOUSE MICKEY ROONEY WITH THE RT. HON. DR. SWAINSON

TALES FROM TINSLETOWN

WITH THE RT. HON. JADE CAREY

When Elizabeth Taylor died earlier this year some ludicrous claims were made in the press about her being the “last great star” or the “last link with studio era Hollywood”. Taylor was a spring chicken in comparison to the likes of her fellow double Oscar winners Louise

Russell Brand is known for his crazy antics. The actor, who found fame in Britain fronting a reality TV show, got his big break in Hollywood in the film “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” which led to a starring role in 2010’s “Get Him to the Greek”. A controversial career spanning

Rainer (101, still going strong) and Olivia de Havilland (coming up 95 in July). The length of her career is also insignificant next to that of one whose first movies were silent, Mickey Rooney.

presenting, journalism, acting and comedy saw him resign from BBC radio after being suspended for prank telephone calls he made to the actor Andrew Sachs.

The Mickster turned 90 last year and doesn’t show too many signs of slowing down. According to IMDB he’s got four films coming out in 2011. He made his debut back in 1926. His screen credits to date total 325.

The 35-year-old star, has spoken openly in interviews and stand-up comedy shows about his prior drug use and promiscuity, and has had various run-ins with the law.His drug abuse and promiscuity has been very much published in magazines and all over the net. He was arrested just last year after he allegedly attacked a photographer at LA international airport. But after he married Katy Perry in October last year I figured he would have quietened down a bit. But it seems his past is still catching up with him as last Sunday he was deported from Japan due to “priors from over 10 years ago.”

Rooney began as child star in the Mickey McGuire shorts, making 59 of them between 1927 and 1933. With the coming of sound his appeal broadened, appearing whenever a juvenile performer was needed in prestigious productions like Manhattan Melodrama (1934). His big break came in Hollywood’s first significant sound attempt to film Shakespeare, as an over-the-top Puck in A Midsummer Night’s Dream (1935). Thereafter Rooney became MGM mogul Louis B. Mayer’s idea of the typical American teenager, starring as Andy Hardy in 1937 and repeating the role in a further 15 features, the last in 1958.

Judy Garland had a recurring role in the Hardy films and she and Rooney branched out in a series of extremely successful musicals, beginning with Babes in Arm in 1939. The “let’s put on a show” formula soon became a stock Hollywood cliché. Between 1939 and 1941 Mickey Rooney was the most popular movie star in the world.

After years of MGM keeping him out of World War II Rooney finally entered military service in 1944. His absence from the screen dealt an irrevocable blow to his career. Never regaining his box-office appeal, after 1948 Rooney was reduced to supporting parts or leads in B-grade programmers.

Bankrupt, eight times married (at the least the first was to a virginal Ava Gardner) and latterly a gay-bashing fundamentalist Christian, Rooney hasn’t stopped making movies in 85 years. If his parts have ranged from the ridiculous (a myopic, buck-toothed oriental in Breakfast at Tiffany’s) to the sublime (Oscar nominated in The Black Stallion) there’s no doubt that he’s the last of the old troopers, one seldom given adequate outlet for a prodigious, undisciplined talent.

Perry, who was in Japan for a series of concerts, tweeted “So... my husband just got deported from Japan, I brought him all this way to show him my favorite place.” She didn’t elaborate on what this “favorite place” was though. An immigration official in Tokyo declined to confirm her comments saying, “We don’t make comments on such a matter because of privacy concerns.” Perry also tweeted “I am so sad…

Tokyo dreams crushed. It was for priors from over 10 years ago!” She also said, “mama not happy, don’t mess with my man! You wanna play let’s go, don’t take a woman’s man from her she’ll get shiasty! This upset many of Her Japanese fans, but before they could retaliate Perry followed her tweets with, “but of course I (love) my Japanese fans and the show must go on no matter the daily aftershocks or husband kidnappings! It’s not right but its okay” Perry then used twitter to try and rescue her husband by urging followers to retweet “Free@ RustyRockets.”

Russell wasn’t silent himself during the ordeal. He updated his followers on the situation with “prisoner” tweets, “Planning escape from Japanese custody. It’s bloody hard to dig a tunnel with a chopstick,” “Stockholm syndrome kicking in. Just asked my guard out for (vegetarian) sushi. He giggled.” “Alcatraz! Shawshank Redemption! And now this! Ah, sweet blue bird of freedom!”

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Pwned with Susan B. Mount and Blade – With Fire and Sword I don’t normally play games that are stand-alone expansion without at least giving the original title a bit of a go. However, as I am not a huge fantasy genre gamer, the original Mount and Blade, along with its expansion Warband, worked their way quite comfortably under my radar. With Fire and Sword, however, is a historical game and thus caught my attention immediately.

Taking place in the 17th Century and in the often ignored areas between Moscow and Warsaw, With Fire and Sword plays more or less like a classic RPG, sans magic. You build your character with points accrued from experience gained, distributing them across categories as diverse as Firearms and Trade. You travel across an ever changing, real time world, receiving missions from drunk in the tavern, right up to the ruler of one of the many factions battling for control of the plains and dense forests of Eastern Europe.

So far so good.

Combat plays out a little differently. Instead of it being turn based, such as in Heroes of Might and Magic or Shattered Union, battles (just like the campaign map) are fought in real time, with you on horseback commanding those mercenaries you have hired.

Pikemen and musketeers abound as you repel devastating charges from Winged Lancers and Tartar raiders. Upkeep of these units can be a p-roblem, however. Better troops can have you running a very tight ship financially, with payments being made every week. Missions, while plentiful, often involve travelling for days on end, across often hostile territory, for minimal fiscal gain. A day long battle against a band of looters, for instance, might cost you ten or more soldiers, but pay only 40 pieces of silver. To give you an idea of the value of currency in the game, with a band of 80 moderate troops I was spending 500 pieces of silver per week. A good bow or musket can cost anywhere from 10000 pieces of silver upwards.

As an avid collector of the Total War games, I was pleasantly surprised by the battle management. Troops are ordered around the battlefield by the player with only slight hiccups. Leading a squadron of lancers into a cluster of hurriedly reloading bandit musketeers is satisfying beyond words. Combat from horseback is also quite amazing, especially if you can get a grip on the mousecontrolled swings of your sabre.

I highly recommend this game and, for just $14.99USD from Steam, it’s a good time to try something new and unusual.

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www.hamilton.co.nz

Consumption and possession of liquor in public places, including vehicles, is prohibited.

Possessing liquor in the CBD is prohibited unless you are carrying it home or to a restaurant or shop.

Comic Review

Pride of Baghdad

by Brian K. Vaughn Art by Niko Henrichon

by The Waikato Fist I think it is important that people read graphic novels.

brought food, just as the citizens of any number of despotic nation states.

Trades, graphic novels, or comics, whatever you want to call them: they are not what you think. Not all of them have superheroes. Very few (these days) have women with impossible proportions. Not all of them are for kids, but neither are they all for grownups. As varied as the writers and audiences of literature, so too are the wordsmiths and artists who build comics.

They meet many creatures, each one giving snippets of what life is all about. The turtle who staunchly defends his stretch of the Tigris can remember as far back as the First World War, but had recently lost his entire family to an oil slick further down the river. A bear, kept in one of Saddam’s many palaces, fills the power vacuum he finds with hatred and terror, before being struck down by the leader of the pride.

A giraffe who thanks a mythical power for his freedom does so in the middle of a bombing run and is obliterated in a shocking series of frames.

Pride of Baghdad, written by Brian K. Vaugn (who wrote Y: The Last Man and Ex Machina) has built his story around one of the sadder, stranger tales to come from Iraq in the opening phases of the 2003 invasion. Too often do we forget about the non-human casualties in war – the dogs and cats caught in the crossfire, birds whose tree top homes are blasted trunks and those poor beasts who are held captive in our zoos. Pride of Baghdad is the tale of the latter. Four lions escape from the Baghdad Zoo after a bombing raid by Allied aircraft and find themselves lost and starving in the empty, yet dangerous, streets of Iraq’s capital.

Some critics might claim that this story takes away from the human casualties in Iraq, but this reviewer feels that they mirror them. These lions, unused to the freedoms and responsibilities of life outside of their enclosure struggle to find food, to explain the changes they see and to deal with the threats they face. So too did the Iraqi people, once the stable by iron rule of Saddam Hussein was toppled. The lions take some time to leave their enclosure, unsure of what lies beyond and sure of only one thing: captivity

This book is not pro-war, nor is it anti-war.

Violence is used for good and for evil. The tanks which chase the lions through the parks of Baghdad are there to bring an end to Saddam, but scatter the animals who are now free. The gang of monkeys who steal the lion cub are ruthlessly eviscerated by a half-blind lioness. The bear is put down.

Perhaps the most shocking scene contained within this decent sized graphic novel is told through a flashback to the savannah of Africa.

Life on the plains is preferable to the lions who have lived their whole lives in captivity and thus do not know the dangers that freedom brings with it.

I would highly recommend this book for anyone with an interest in the war in Iraq, or even those interested in the politics of animal captivity and family.

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The Waikato Fist

Agora

DIRECTED BY ALEJANDRO AMENÁBAR or the easily bored. It is history, complete with the long debates and the lengthy silences. History isn’t a constant series mean, they didn’t even have the internet

William Wallace was executed or Queen Elizabeth the First wasn’t assassinated? If you were, you’re dumb and shouldn’t be allowed near people or sharp things.

This movie is a couple of years old now, but with festival circuits and New Zealand distribution being what they are, it’s hitting our cinemas now. Go and see it. You will realise something is

means no facebook.

I grew up on biblical epics. The Ten Commandments, The Robe and yes, even Quo Vadis sit somewhere in my drug addled mind. Set just a short time after Christianity has become things are going downhill and it’s not a good time for anyone.

opens his mouth and the bleak, sinking feeling you get doesn’t leave. I was still feeling bleak and scared of Churches for days afterwards.

I’m not anti-Christian at all, but something about this particular piece of cinema gave me a funny feeling that perhaps the director and screen writer are. They are shown to be dirty idiots who think science and education are on par with witchcraft and

dark days at the end of the Roman Empire. She was an educated woman, we know that much, but beyond that all we know is that she was killed by the Christians.

Christian men, women and children to death, I’m pretty much rooting for them.

Why was she killed by the Christians? Well, because she wasn’t a Christian, she was educated and she was a woman who dared to talk in public and teach men. Don’t start complaining that I ruined the movie, because I haven’t. Were you shocked when

moment. Hypatia’s interaction with her pupils and her slaves as civilisation seemingly collapses around them are the stuff of Oscar nomination. Too bad it would have been eligible a few Academy Awards ago.

Pirates of the Carribean: On Stranger Tides Josh Cooper

Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) returns in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. I was glad to see that they retained Depp and let go Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley, but still the

pursuing the Fountain of Youth: the English, the Spanish and Blackbeard (Ian Mcshane). Jack joins us from Blackbeard’s ship. He is tricked on board

by Angelica/Blackbeard’s daughter (Penelope Cruz) and he is to lead them to the Fountain. They start on an unexpected adventure full of romance, Mermaids, death and funny one-liners.

The director Rob Marshall did a great job in rejuvenating the

DIRECTED BY ROB MARSHALL

bet we will be seeing his name on a few more blockbusters soon.

Bringing back Johnny Depp as Captain Jack sparrow was the smartest thing they could have done because this movie franchise would be nothing without Depp and to see it go on without him would be horrible. He is the same drunken I found myself laughing at a few one-liners and there was a bit of adult humor, which is fun because a lot of the kids wouldn’t understand, but the parents would.

catchy and had the same themes as the previous three. I didn’t feel it wouldn’t have changed the movie as much as it did in something like Avatar.

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 is worth your coin and will come up as

in the franchise and make sure you wait till after the credits for an after credits scene.

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Judy Reads

Kevin Pryor Goes Down on Comics

Book Review You’d be forgiven for thinking that Mark One on Victoria Street stocks comics just for adolescent boys. As you roam around the store you see row after row of unimaginative reruns of Batman, Superman, X-Men and the other usual superhero suspects. Which means when you find that little corner reserved for decent comics, they become all the more precious. A good comic (or graphic novel if you will), is one of the most rewarding art forms going around. But like a good woman, they can be hard to find.

X’d Out Charles Burns

The Final Reckoning Sam Bourne

Charles Burns is like a good woman. Attractive from the outside, certainly, but also containing depth and intelligence behind the pretty pictures. X’d Out is his latest effort. And when I say effort I mean it, literally. His previous masterwork, ‘Black Hole,’ took ten years to complete. That ten years of craft was revealed on every page, via a gripping narrative and stunning chiaroscuro art. What marks Burns out from his other rivals at the top of the comics tree is his

Sam Bourne is the pseudonym of Jonathan Freedland, an award winning journalist and broadcaster. That he has a background in journalism is possibly one of the reasons his writing style is so distinctive, there always seems to be an element of well done research intertwined with the story he creates. I’ve read a few of Sam Bourne’s books, and have always found them enjoyable. His writing style is gripping and enjoyable, he always manages to keep me up and reading for longer than I mean to. Sam Bourne’s The Final Reckoning is a political/conspiracy thriller that involves lawyers, the United Nations, corruption, secrets and hundreds of deaths that haven’t been explained.

The Main character is Tom Byrne, a disillusioned lawyer who will work for anyone no matter what their affiliations. An old friend asks him to take a job with the U.N, which he does as he has nothing to lose. A U. N security employee has shot and killed a supposed suicide bomber and Tom is sent o London to deal with the family of the man who had been killed. During this

subject matter. Whereas the likes of Dan Clowes and Jamie Hernandez opt for realism, he seeks to spin yarns. Taking inspiration from such diverse material as Tintin, E.C Horror, and 1950s Romance comics, Burns stands alone.

In X’d Out, he opts for a full colour, clear line style reminiscent of Tintin - marking a departure from his usual black and white. But what is retained from his previous works is the sense of eeireness. X’d Out is weird, and slightly disturbing.

Like ‘Black Hole,’ X’d Out plays with our perceptions of space and time. One moment we are watching the troubled lives of a group of teenagers, the next we seem to lurch into a whole other dimension. As it is only Part One of a series, it isn’t yet clear what this other dimension is all about. What I do know though, is that Burns is well on the way to creating another classic of sequential picture art.

process Tom discovers that old man who had been incorrectly killed was involved in a secret group whose mission is to kill any living Nazi’s who were responsible for atrocities inflicted on the Jews in the second World War. – this element of the story is based on the actual actions of some holocaust survivors. I don’t really want to go into the plot much more that, if I were to I’m scared I’d wreck the book.

It explores a part of history that we all know something about, but it also brings up new things to think about while being incredibly thrilling and easy to read. His novels have been compared to Dan Brown’s, and in a way I agree with this, because they are easy to read and become involved with. However I’d pick a Sam Bourne over a Dan Brown any day. Bourne’s facts are more credible, and the characters are much more solid ( I’m not going to lie, Brown’s Robert Langdon drives me up the wall).I’ve recommended this to quite a few people, and those who have read it have really enjoyed it even though sometimes the topics covered aren’t the most pleasant. Bourne is definitely an author who I will be following in the future.

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PRESENTS

OUR:HOUSE

THE BUSTED PAGE

MAY 14TH - GRAVITY & ALTITUDE

NITRO

AGENDA

ALL PHOTOS BY SHANNON ROLFE - SHANNONROLFE.COM

There’s even more To see each week on...

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