issue 2

Issue 02

Secret History The dark corners of the past brought to light!

Top Fives!

Written by Debrin

O Week Photos

Photos taken by Debrin

Want Free Food?

Domino’s Pizza Giveaways

8 March 2010

EDITORIAL

Whatever you guys did, it worked.

It’s the week after O-Week. First years are probably walking round right now wondering what the fuck they’re doing at university, now that all the truly epic piss-ups are done and dusted. If they’re lucky, they’ll be able to remember enough of O-Week to know what they should be tested for. Second years are most likely weighing up whether last year’s O-Week was more massive than this year’s. Third years will still be on it, knowing it’s their last O-Week at university and trying desperately to keep the party going. Graduate students will finally feel safe going to a bar without running into (and shagging) that hot first year in the tutorial they take.

I would have to say that it was the best O-Week of my time here at university and that’s saying something, because I have been here for waytoo-fucking long.

I’m not just saying it’s the best because the quality of the women has gone up considerably, due to some freak genetic event in the early 1990s. There are always pretty girls at uni. It is how university works. You think half of these dropkick douche bags called first years would even consider uni if it wasn’t for the array of fabulous, independent and intelligent women who flock to uni every year? Ironically, these women come here so they won’t be stuck in their small, crappy home towns for the rest of their lives; marrying those exact same dropkick douche bags that are now flooding university purely for the chance to get their mack on. It’s a vicious cycle. Where was I? Oh yeah: beautiful women didn’t make this year’s O-Week the best.

I’m not saying it’s the best because of the awesome turn outs to O-Week events like amazing creepy-hypnotist guy or the rad gig on Friday. Crowds make events at O-Week. No one wants to be the only person at a gig or the only person at a comedy show. You guys, the students of Waikato, make O-Week events awesome. Without you it’d just be Concord Dawn and Guy Cater and the rest standing in a field by a lake that smells like the ducks just got drive-by enemas. The crowds, however, did not make O-Week 2010 the best I have seen.

Not even my new flat, where I live with three beautiful and hilarious women (one of whom is my wife who lets me touch her on the vagina sometimes) has made this O-Week the best O-Week I can remember. The fact we have all had fleas for the past week because some idiot decided to bring a stray cat around to touch all of our possessions and rub up on our legs hasn’t taken any of the awesomeness away from our flat. Not even the fact that the guy we live with ate stale bread from the rubbish bin after me and one of the girls rubbed it on our front bottoms (admittedly, without his knowledge) has managed to take away from the glory that is Casa de Claudelands. But still, my new flat is not what made O-Week 2010 the best I have ever been to.

Now that I think about it more, there’s no tangible reason I can use to explain why this OWeek has been the best. It has been everything, from the organisers up at the Waikato Student Union to the volunteers who have been running around making sure everything is running smooth to the seething mass of unwashed youths who flooded the Village green, day and night, rain or shine.

So thanks, to all you who had anything to do with this year’s O-Week, even if it was just turning up and being a face in the crowd.

Whatever you guys did, it worked.

Credits: EDITOR: Art Robinson (editor@nexusmag.co.nz) DESIGN: Talia Musson (graphics@nexus-npl.co.nz) ADVERTISING: Tony Arkell, Sarah Kelly, Ian Musson

CONTENTS PAGE

(ads@nexusmag.co.nz) NEWS EDITOR: Grant Burns (news@nexusmag.co.nz)

3. Editorial!

SUB-EDITOR: why do we need one of these? LOL! WEB GURU: Jed Laundry (jlaundry@gmail.com)

5. Low 5!

20.

Notices!

22-23

Pictures of you during O-Week!

25-27

Debrin’s Top Fives!

MUSIC EDITOR: Hollie Jackson (music@nexusmag.co.nz) FILM EDITOR: Richard Swainson (films@nexusmag.co.nz) BOOKS EDITOR: Kevin Pryor (books@nexusmag.co.nz) GAMES EDITORS: To be decided by virtue of content submission (games@nexusmag.co.nz)

Contributors Dirty Old Blair Munro, Dirty Young Enisa Kartal, Dirty Asian Chris Tan, Dirty Little Hollie Jackson, Dirty Hipster Kevin

7-11. News from Uni and around the world!

12. Secret History – the dark corners of the past brought to light!

13-16. Waikato Student’s Union Pages!

Pryor, Art’s Hot Wife, Erin “it’s my hair, not a fire” Macfarlane, Loud American Mackenzie McCarty, Paul the Ninja Barlow, Yanna’s Breasts, Dr Richard Swainson, Sash Nixon.

Nexus is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA).

THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THIS PUBLICATION ARE NOT NECESSARILY THE VIEWS OF NEXUS PUBLICATIONS 2003 LTD, ANY OF OUR ADVERTISERS, THE WSU, APN, THE EDITOR, OR ANYONE. WE ARE WAY TOO DRUNK TO REMEMBER WHAT WE SAID AND WHEN WE SAID IT

WANT TO ADVERSTISE WITH NEXUS? EMAIL ads@nexusmag.co.nz OR call 07 838 4653 OR 021 176 6180

NEXUS IS LOCATED AT Ground Floor, Student Union Building, Gate One, University of Waikato, Knighton Road, Hamilton PHONE: 07 838 4653 FAX: 07 838 4588 EMAIL: editor@nexusmag.co.nz POSTAL: Private Bag 3059, Hamilton

17 Bow Before the 8-Ball!

18-19 Lettuce!

28.

29-32.

33.

34-37

48 Hour Film Competition!

Columns Galore!

More pictures of O-Week!

Reviews!

INTERVIEW: LO 5

Lo 5

Interviews by Erin

LO QUESTIONS 1. What’s the Worst movie ever?

2. Who is the ugliest band right now?

3. Who was the hottest performer of O Week?

4. Would you make out with Art Focker for a 12 pack of Beer?

5. If you could be any animal, what would it be?

Charlotte - Teaching 1. Any Movie without Colour 2. Aerosmith. They’re pretty gross.

3. National bank guy. Definitely the hottest.

4. I don’t even know who that is. Beer is gross.

5. A moose. Cause they live in Canada?

Eli - Science 1. Grease, cause of the outfits.

2. My Chemical Romance.

3. The Samoan Lavalava dancers, cause they were girls.

4. No! 5. A Sloth. They don’t do anything.

Amy & Brenna - English & Psychology 1. Step Up. 2. Jonas Brothers. They look like 12-year-olds.

3. State of Mind 4. Why not?

5. A Bird, so we could fly.

Sam & Simon - Sport & leisure 1. Anaconda 3.

2. Akon. Gross.

3. The DJ at the foam party. That went off!

4. Nah. Tempting...

5. One of those Harry Potter flying birds. They’re such beasts.

Arianne - Screen & Media 1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

Ghost Rider. Or anything with Nicolas Cage.

Nickleback, always.

What? It’s O Week?

Haha. Ha. A Fucking Cheetah Bro.

O-WEEK NEWS ISSUE 02

XXX Week

By Grant Burns, Crown Prince of Gonzo Simultaneous to the first falling leaf of autumn, 2010 O’Week began with a blistering sun and a fuck load of fun. Events like toilet racing, the dunker, and touch the transvestites showed the class and organisation of the wonderful WSU. Marquees covered the Village Green from head to toe, handing out everything from bibles to condoms, condom bibles to bible condoms. Christians, Young Nats, Old Labour Dogs, and any other organisation that targets young people’s money, converged together for a week of preying on unsuspecting first-years and their easy-to-impress minds.

The most exciting Monday of the year lived up its name when students showed up for their first classes of the year; many would have been mistaken to have thought they had strolled upon a Rio beach party.

Consistent reggae beats kept the crowd chilled from the burning sun.

Looking around there was a bit of everything: booze, funny hats, yelling, beautiful woman, not so beautiful women, men, and loads of free stuff – pretty much everything but study or intellectual discussion.

Darkness changes all. Once the uni gates are shut before sunset, the beasts creep out to play. O’Week goes from the caring, safe hands of the WSU into the cold, rotting hands of the student bars where they will leave you alone, naked crying on the floor – just as long as you have a drink in your hand.

Mondays’ night was a sexfest in disguise. Miss O’Week and a Foam Party. Harmless? Never. A makeshift catwalk was the destination for Miss O’Week ; a collection of courageous young women who bear the banter to show off their flesh in front of a bunch of males in a hope to be respected. Now I admit, my hearing ain’t what it used to be. But, I could swear, through all the drunken yelling and yahooing, I heard the definite chant of “slut slut slut.” Whether that was subjective or objective, nevertheless it was definitely implied.

To relieve myself from the over-sexuality of Miss O’Week, I indulged in the Outback Inn for some safe family fun. Instead it was just a bunch of firstyear girls getting doused in cold white foam. All those hot, wet, half-naked

bodies made me hungry so I went to get a kebab. Turns out the Kebab shop is not open at 11:30pm on a Monday night – disappointing.

The rain came on Tuesday as scheduled soaking the unwashed masses in a sense of clarity as what university life is all about. Looking around I could see the potential for something great in 2010. No longer will Waikato be dumped among the minorities of the New Zealand universities such as Lincoln, Canterbury, and Massey, but know we are known as university to be reckoned with through all codes. We have world class lecturers, beautiful campus grounds, a diverse multicultural student demography, and an outstanding students union full of hard worker employees and volunteers. Don’t be ashamed of coming to Waikato; be proud! Because if we can just start thinking about what can be done to clean up the Waikato’s waterways or live in a more sustainable manner, rather than argue about the state of the Chiefs backline, then we might actually achieve something every Hamiltonian and New Zealander can be proud of. Be all you can be, for we are all human and hold the potential to succeed.

Wednesday did what Wednesday does, comes in between Tuesday and Thursday. However, this Wednesday was not like the other Wednesdays, no. This particular Wednesday was full of campus clubs all over the Village Green, clubs from The Marxist Workers Party to the Pagans, Pinoys to Polynesians. Oh yes, this Wednesday was like no other, it has no brother, and will never come again (well maybe B Semester).

Wednesday night was an exact reincarnation of Animal House minus the mighty Belushi.

Thursday morning I was up before the dawn. Flying to uni I could taste something in the air, something more than just sex or sweat. Tonight was the most infamous night of all annual drunken shenanigans: Beerfest. I acquiesced to the fact that, if not myself, some lucky student will wake in a body bag, another in a urine-soaked heck hole, or even worse: reality.

So, now, in the tradition of every storyteller that has come before me, I will leave you with the three most annoying, suspense-building words in all literary history: to be continued…

O Week–at night

By Debrin Foxcroft

Togas, hypnotists, quizzes, comedy and music.

O’Week at night had a lot going for it. And, for the most part, the nights lived up to the hype.

Monday night ushered in the celebrations with a traditional pub quiz at Bar101. Just a heads up guys: Machu Picchu is in Peru.

Curly questions challenged the teams, with WSU staff officiating the results. The brick interior of Bar101 gave the event an elegant air, with most contestants starting their O’Week with a gentle buzz. The philosophy of the crowd seemed to lean towards lasting the week-long marathon rather then going down in flames the first night out.

Tuesday was a night of intentional and sometimes unintentional hilarity.

Hypnotist Guy Cater captured the audience at the fenced in Village Green with a two-hour show that was a mix of genius, smutty jokes and audience participation. Everyone who was there will invariably mention two moments of the evening. The first is a certain radio station host weeping over his missing penis. There are some things no man wants to lose.

The other memorable moment was a little more worrying. A student hypnotized to believe he was a lion disobeyed orders and attacked a woman in the front row.

The woman was hurt but by all reports is now ok.

Other than the escape of one wild beast, the night was a huge success.

The audience seemed to enjoy themselves, the participants seemed to have a laugh and the radio guy eventually found his member.

It was the Toga pub crawl on Wednesday that really had the potential to be great and go to custard, all at the same time. Students dressed in little sheets of material plus alcohol will always be an interesting watch.

Starting with responsible hosts, Momento, the students wolfed down hot chips before jumping on to buses provided by the WSU. The tour of Hamilton’s famous, and occasionally infamous bars took in Bahama Hut, The Cook, The Hilly and Bar101. Volunteers did an amazing job of corralling the students who enjoyed drinks and games at the various locals. A few were packed off home to sleep off what will have been impressive hangovers but most managed to stumble their way through.

On the buses songs were sung and a dare or two performed. The highlight for the men on one of the buses was a young lady who was dared to strip down to her underwear for $20. The offer of a bottle of alcohol got her to take her bra off and do a little dance.

The final stop was Bar101, where the merry travelers were joined by a throng of other students dressed in togas. The bar was packed and as a few wary travelers made their way home, many more were trying to make their way in.

The final two nights of events, the comedy night and the WSU Project featuring Conchord Dawn and Cornerstone came after this reporter’s deadline. But go online to nexusmag.co.nz to read about the hits and misses of the two nights and to see more photos from O’Week.

NEXUS NEWS ISSUE 02

Drink like a fish

By Grant Burns

“I was just trying to offer something new, something different that the people of Hamilton hadn’t seen before” Logan Hughes did exactly what he set out to do in O’Week: gain publicity for his bar. Owner of Hamilton bar Agenda, Mr Hughes set up an O’Week promotion selling ‘goldfish shots’ to students which quickly caught the eye of the

The shot itself goes like this: one goldfish in a glass of water, one tequila or sours shot. Shoot the shot then swallow the goldfish at the same time. Then, voila! A drink and meal for fewer than ten dollars!

politically correct.

After promoting it a week before O’Week on Agenda’s Facebook page, Mr Hughes didn’t even have to pour a shot before he was set upon by all sorts of animal activists, Waikato Times’ readers, and do-gooders. In reaction, Mr Hughes pulled the promotion citing that he had gained all the publicity he ever wanted and didn’t want to seriously piss anyone off.

“It was never my intention to offend anybody,” said Mr Hughes.

“I had seen it as part of my travels aboard and thought it would be a cool, new idea to bring back to New Zealand.”

However, this is not the first time this shot has been offered in New Zealand. According to Mr Hughes, the same drink was offered in Wellington which was met with immense publicity and Police presence.

“I was just trying to offer something new, something different that the people of Hamilton hadn’t seen before. The ‘goldfish shot’ is common through Europe, the Americas, Thailand,” said Mr Hughes.

Mr Hughes had ordered 200 goldfish for O’Week, but since the idea was canned he is instead going to be offering free shots with

chocolate fish – but don’t worry, by the time you have read this the promotion will be over!

Continuing with the publicity side of this stunt, Agenda is a modern bar which has been operating in Hamilton for over seven and half months and is situated next to the beginning of the Outback corridor on Victoria Street.

Mr Hughes next stunt: tattoo night. Get a tiny tattoo of the Agenda logo and score a $50 bar tab.

Goldfish can be illegally purchased from the uni lakes.

Taking the fun out of fun driving

By Grant Burns

The Government looks set to impose many new driving laws to stem the amount of road accidents and fatalities in New Zealand.

Proposed changes include: raising the driving age to 16, a zero alcohol-limit for under 20’s, changing the right give way rule at intersections, and more booze and buds buses to catch stoned sober drivers.

Transport Minister Steven Joyce presented the proposed law changes to Parliament last Wednesday. “Some of the proposed actions represent significant change - raising the driving age, zero blood alcohol limits for young drivers and repeat drink drivers, introducing alcohol interlock technology and making changes to our give way rules.”

“We need this change if we are to benefit from a road system with fewer deaths and injuries.

“The Safe System approach depends on us all taking responsibility for road safety. The roads belong to all of us, and in developing Safer Journeys views were sought from all New Zealanders.

The Government is targeting young drivers especially boy racers with their proposed law changes. However, many believe changing the laws won’t stem the fatalities. “Raising the driving age won’t lower the road toll,” warns Donald Aubrey, Federated Farmers transport spokesperson.

Over the coming months, the Minister said he will take a series of action plans to Cabinet to confirm and detail policy changes. The first two of these will cover young drivers (to Cabinet in March) and drink driving (April).

NEWS MUSIC SEASONS ISSUE 02

Jungle of Love Have I ever been more excited than I was during the road trip to Rhythm and Vines? Heck. No. For what awaited me was the most insane New Years ever. Here are the highlights...

Day One: As the audience chants seem to drag on for ages, ‘Major Lazer’ comes out to the ecstatic audience alongside his M.C. from hell ‘Skewwit Bwoy’. While Diplo (Switch is absent) teases the audience with his Jamaican bass-

driven beats, Skewwit Bwoy amps the crowd in any way possible; climbing the speakers, threatening to hang himself, and staggering across the stage with the warped smile of a serial killer on smack.

Lazers’ aural assault climaxes with the song ‘Pon De Floor’, sending the already twisted punters completely fucking ballistic, easily being THE moment of the festival.

Day Two: Out of the depths of Russia, Proxy takes to the Cellar

Stage in all his distorted Drum N’ Bass glory. His infectious dark dance poisons the entire area, his perverse beats slamming the audience into pure mayhem. Over on the Rhythm Stage, 2ManyDJ’s play a more mainstream set of dance tracks. These giants show Proxy how to really amp a crowd,

Day Three: The goon I forced down myself (NEVER AGAIN) puts the performance of The John Butler Trio in a haze, but laxing out almost comaring on a hill to the sweet acoustics of the Australian Trio as the sun goes down is just as brilliant as the experience of entering the new year with DJ

by remixing the likes of Justice, MGMT, The Prodigy and even Sidney Samson’s Riverside. Nice.

Thank you, brothers from Soulwax.

Krafty Kutz...Or maybe it was more the triumph that I made it to the New Year alive..Either way, both acts kicked major ass.

Gruelling Day Out HIM January 15th. 11 am. Mt. Smart Stadium. It is that time of year again in which I rise to the challenge of the over bearing sun, the thousands of punters, and the suffocating ‘D’ entry for the 2010 Big Day Out. All radio friendly foundations built up by Dizzy and Lily (go back to the Boiler Room guys, you were better there) were destroyed by the energetic force of ‘The Mars Volta’.

Watching these guys perform is almost tiring, whether its Cedric body slamming himself across the stage like a madman possessed or

Omar mounting over his guitar in agony or ecstasy.

The reigning champs of pomp ‘Muse’ delivered a stage show resembling 3 musicians in space on an acid trip, with a frenzy of fluorescent lazers, lights, digital screens and smoke. Beginning their aural onslaught with Uprising and Supermassive Balck Hole, Muse gave the packed out stadium all their big hits. For those new to Muse, it was the perfect intro-gig.

For us die-hard fans, well, we’ve seen it all before. Still, they do put on a good show.

David Bennett MP M P f o r h aMi l t o n ea s t

Phone: 07 834 3407 Email: davidbennett@xtra.co.nz www.davidbennett.co.nz

www.national.org.nz 10

Every album tour from 2006, HIM have rocked out on stage with their unique “Love Metal” sound in Auckland, wooing hundreds of 16 year old Heartagram-whores.

However, this year they decided that, and to quote frontman Ville Valo, coming to New Zealand was not “cost effective”. So, being a HIM fan from way back, I flew over to Oz to see them.

At 10am on the day, around 50 goth kids lined up outside the Metro Theatre in the heart of Sydney. Come 7pm, the line went down the rugby field length allyway and up the other street. After pouring in to the venue at, the few over 18s headed straight for the bar that offered $8 cans of VB. An ear piercing roar emitting from inside the venue made me skull my full can of VB and flee into the pit.

The band members waltz on the stage first, followed by Valo. The first thing I noticed, shockingly, was the absence of a cigarette in Valos hand which usually accompanies him wherever he goes. For

someone getting on in his years, he can still scream like a dark Billy Idol.

The band played well, not the best I’ve seen of them, but good nonetheless. From classics like Poison Girl and Right Here in My Arms, to American-produced Heartkiller and Wings of a Butterfly, every song was played with great enthusiasm from every band mate.

Sadly, the gig itself seemed very commercialised; they came, they played, everyone left. No one chanted for an encore and I was surrounded by slutty teenage girls texting throughout the entire concert. Not even when people started shouting “take it off!” to Ville Valo did they look up.

However, the fans that had been sitting outside since the early hours of the day were the nicest people I have ever met, you can talk to any of them and no matter what you look like or where you’re from, they welcome you with open arms... literally. (This band is for girls and vampires. Ed.)

NEWS FROM NOWHERE ISSUE 02

NATIONALISED NEWS

Internationalised News BY GRANT BURNS

Earthquake/tsunami in Chile Last weekend the South American nation of Chile was horrifically devastated by a massive earthquake which recorded 8.8 on the Richter

Tighter Tertiary’s Fears are growing that Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce is planning to make changes to the open access policies regarding over-20’s, bridging students, and eligibility for student loans at all New Zealand universities.

New Zealand Union of Student’s Associations co-President and former WSU President, Pene Delaney, is deeply concerned on the effect this will have to students.

“We are concerned that moves to restrict entry for over-20s will limit access to those

who missed their first opportunities for tertiary education. This would disproportionately affect Maori, Pasifika, and second chance learners.”

NZUSA CO-President David Do believes 2009/2010 could be the last time students get to utilise open access policies to New Zealand universities.

“We are highly concerned that this will be the last cohort of students to enjoy fair and open access to university, if policies are changed to restrict access,” says Do.

scale. The epicentre began off the coast of Chile and resonated throughout the whole of the Pacific Ocean.

The 8.8 earthquake was bigger than the one which destroyed Haiti last month and has been heralded as one of the most devastating earthquakes of the century.

The capital Santiago has been ravished with fallen buildings and crushed souls. The New Zealand embassy in Chile has fortunately reported no New Zealand deaths.

In relation, the New Zealand Civil Defence Authority is warning New Zealanders to take tsunami warnings a little more seriously. This comes after crowds rushed to the beaches to see if anything would happen whilst the civil defence siren was blasting all day.

New meaning to “too pissed to drive”

Naked bike rider appeals his case Naked cyclist Nick Lowe has successfully appealed his conviction and fine for riding his bike naked near Upper Hutt last year.

Mr Lowe was convicted and fined for offensive behaviour last March for riding his bicycle in his skins. The Police man prosecuted Mr Lowe said he was huge but still fell short compared to the wang of the law.

However, Mr Lowe believed it is his right to bike wearing any clothing (even if that happens to

be no clothing) he chooses as long as he wears a helmet.

Mr Lowe successfully appealed against his $400 of fines and continues to ride in the buff and Nexus encourages all students to the same thing.

He told The Dominion Post when he filed the appeal: “It’s a lifestyle thing - to put clothes on is uncomfortable. It’s not about exhibitionism; I’m just uncomfortable in clothes.”

Authorities in the US believe a man was killed by accidentally urinating on a downed power line after a crashing his car into it.

Sheriff’s Deputy Dave Pimentel, of Grays Harbour County in Washington, told KXRO-AM radio on Monday that Roy Messenger was not seriously hurt after he collided with a power pole on Friday and called a relative to pull his car from a ditch.

However, family members found 50-year-old Messenger electrocuted with his pants around his ankles when they arrived.

Pimentel says Messenger apparently urinated into a roadside ditch but didn’t see the live wire.

The urine stream likely served as a conductor, allowing the electricity to reach his body.

Pimentel says there will be an autopsy but burn marks indicated the way the electricity travelled through Messenger’s body.

11

HISTORY NEWS ISSUE 01

The Kent State Massacre May 4 1970 Kent State University Ohio

Secret History of the World

By Grant Burns

1970 was a time of great political and social unrest.

The turbulent sixties had just come to an end leaving behind it an unpopular war in South East Asia, protests over Civil Rights, burnt out angel-headed hipsters, and the worst American President (until George W. Bush) Richard Nixon. This was also a time of draft cards, daily protests, and the last Beatles album to ever be released: Let It Be. On April 30, President Nixon announced the new invasion of Cambodia as a strategic advancement in the Vietnam War. Immediately students arranged a protest at Kent State University on May 1. Over 500 students turned out, many burning their draft cards while others displayed placards which read “Bring the War Home.” Police arrived and used tear gas to disperse the crowd. Another protest was organised for May 4th.

On Monday May 4th over 2000 students gathered to continue their protest against the American Government and America’s role in the War of Vietnam. By 10am, the National Guard had shown up in gas masks and started hurling tear gas at the students. In reaction, the students chucked the tear gas back at the Guard while others chanted “Pigs off Campus!”

By midday it was apparent that the crowd was not going to disperse. 77 National Guardsmen armed with rifles and bayonets then proceeded to assemble at the top of a hill looking down upon the protesting students who were moving towards them. Suddenly, at exactly 12:24PM, 29 of the 77 Guardsmen opened fire on the marching, unarmed students. In 13 seconds, a total of 67 shots were fired, 4 students lay dead and a further 9 were wounded. No one knows why the shots were fired.

12

A massive aftermath followed the shooting. The picture of a terrified female student crying over the body of her friend went around the world as the main photograph of the anti-war movement. The photograph (pictured here) went on to win a Pultizer Prize.

Protests sprang up all over America. Songs, films, and books flooded the media; protesters waved flags that said “You Can’t Kill Us All” and “Fuck It All.” Thirteen of the Guardsmen were indicted but never convicted for the massacre. They claimed to fire in self-defence: self-defence against unarmed, peacefully protesting students with flowers in their hair.

And so it was. The event which showed a democratic government, elected by the people, would fire on the very people it has sworn to protect just because they don’t agree with shooting other people half way around the world. Wounds such as these will never heal, but shall remain open for all those who come after to learn from. The events which occurred on May 4, 1970, went against the first amendment of the Bill of Rights: the right to free speech and assembly and like the Founding Fathers wrote: that whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or abolish it. Because, sometimes, you just can’t Let it Be.’

“History does nothing; it does not possess immense riches, it does not fight battles. It is men, real, living, who do all this.” – Karl Marx A Democratic government is created by the people for the people to protect and serve the people in a free and just society.

Right? So therefore no government of the people would hurt its own people. Right? Especially not one of the greatest democratic republics of all time. Left? Wrong!

(Well obviously you knew that was coming why else would I be writing in this style) So let me take you back to a time where if you’re going to San Francisco, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair!

YOUR: WSU

Prez Sez Deni Tokunai Everybody wants an exciting and entertaining O-Week and that’s exactly what your Waikato Students’ Union (WSU) gave you to kick off the 2010 academic year—a bloody good O-Week! From the WSU Pool Party on Sunday where 300 first year students rocked up to lap up the sun and waves of

Wednesday, our Clubs’ Day. There was competition, fun and games, prizes, events, stalls, free breakfasts, awesome music, and even guest appearances by the Chiefs and a huge number of both popular and emerging bands.

The Hypnotist had me laughing in uncontrollable fits and the most

lion claws had he not been tranquilised.

The Toga Tavern Tour was off the hook, where 77 lucky students had the chance to party on Hamilton’s only double-decker bus as well as a pimped out fire truck that would have put MJ to shame. On top of all of that, one lucky student

participation to help us kick off 2010 on a great note.

Even though your WSU O-Week has now finished, that doesn’t mean the fun doesn’t stop. Over the course of this year WSU will be providing you with lots more entertainment—keep your eyes and ears open!

the university pool, to the Friday finale where over a 1000 students turned up to listen to vibes pelted out during the WSU Orientation Project—you wanted something to remember and you got it!

All our ticketed events were sold out and we had massive crowds flock through the Village Green every day—particularly during

memorable volunteers who were hypnotised had to be Matt from “Poets’ Corner, Shakespeare Avenue…over in Stratford” who also was the same Matt that “lost” his penis—and ended up in tears. And of course, I don’t think anybody will forget Oscar “The Lion”, who I thought might have really mauled somebody with his imaginary

also won the WSU ‘Bomb’, the free car that went to the winner of the WSU Endurance Challenge.

Congratulations!

Overall, it was a memorable WSU O-Week and one that would not have been a success if you (our students and the life of this university) had not given your time, your energy, patience and

If you want to send me feedback regarding O-Week, from what you loved to what you didn’t like so much, please feel free to send me an email at president@wsu.org.nz.

Deni Tokunai President Waikato Students’ Union

VP’s Speak Luke Claasen - Ngati Porou Tena koutou katoa. My name is Luke and I am the WSU Vice President Māori for 2010. I sit parallel in the WSU to the VP (Glen) and we both share the office next to Deni, who is the WSU President for 2010. I am in my fifth year of the BMS/LLB six year sentence, majoring in Economics and Law respectively. I am fresh to the WSU and since January I have learned so much about what the WSU actually does!

I sit on the Admissions Appeal Committee and the Cultural Committee on behalf of the WSU. The VP Māori also sits on Te Mana Akonga, which is the National Māori Tertiary Students’ Association. I also hold the WSU Mature Students portfolio: by

the way, if you don’t already know, there is a space for mature students in the Cowshed building so go check it out.

I also work closely with the Pro Vice Chancellor Māori Office who organise Māori events on campus.

These include the University Wide Pohiri, Hākinakina, Kingitanga Day and Te Wiki o te Reo (Māori Language Week) to name but a few.

Māori students make up around 20 percent of the University student population and I represent their voice on the WSU board of directors. This year there is a strong group of students who are re-establishing a Waikato Māori Students’ Roopu. This is one of my big goals for the year. There is a

competition for a name and a logo for the Roopu so keep your eyes out for the advertisement poster.

If you want to get in touch with me then email me on vpmaori@wsu. org.nz or rock on up to the WSU office.

“Ko te reo te mauri o te mana Māori” (The language is the heart and soul of the mana of Māoridom).

Ngā mihi nui Luke Claasen

OPEN: 8.30am-4.30pm PHONE: 07 856 9139 WEB: www.wsu.org.nz 13

YOUR: WSU

YOUR: WSU

WHERE DOES THE MONEY COME FROM? YOU BELONG TO WSU AND WSU BELONGS TO YOU! Every student pays a small fee of $95 which helps us achieve all the work you set for us.

PRESIDENT/VP EXPENSES:

ORIENTATION:

BOARD EXPENSES:

$8.74 per student. Collectively the President and Vice Presidents sit on more than 30 committees for you. They make sure that students are taken into account everytime the University makes a decision.

The President receives $30,000 per year, and both of the VPs receive $15,000 each.

$7.97 per student. The WSU organises, arranges, and finances Orientation at the start of the year, and ReOrientation at the start of B Semester. O Week doesn’t come cheap we offset this by income generated through sponsorship and advertising, and because of this you get two week long events for the bargain price of $7.97.

$7.71 per student. The Board of Directors who receive $3,000 per year – this amount is approved annually by you guys at our AGM. Your $7.71 also pays for the directors to develop their representation and advocacy skills at the three NZUSA conferences.

NEXUS: $8.74 per student. Nexus is your weekly student magazine, which is free to all students.

For your money you get 24 jam-packed editions of Nexus, a student diary and a wallplanner!

EVENTS AND ACTIVITIES: $11.13 per student. This is the fun stuff, and for many of you the main interaction you have with WSU. Activities change regularly and we work hard to enhance your campus experience by bringing you events like Noho Marae, Adult Learners Week, Dodgeball and the Vagina Monologues.

CLUBS: $6.60 per student. The WSU actively supports and encourages membership of clubs by providing meeting spaces, holding club days, employing a clubs co-ordinator and providing grants for club activities.

ADVOCACY AND HARDSHIP: $8.69 per student. The WSU Advocacy Service helps students who need representation, support or those who find themselves in unexpected financial hardship.

SPORTING ACTIVITIES: $6.27 per student. This money contribues to events such as Tertiary Challenge; UniBlues; and support for sports club development. It also helps lower the cost for students who represent The Tribe (Waikato) at UniGames.

SCHOLARSHIPS: $1.65 per student. WSU has three scholarships of varying amounts. 1) WSU scholarship for cultural contribution 2)The John Houston Scholarship for academic/cultural contribution 3) Sole Parent/ Caregiver award.

PRESIDENT/VP EXPENSES: $8.74

BOARD EXPENSES: $7.71

NATIONAL REPRESENTATION:

NEXUS: $8.74

ADMINISTRATION $18.92

$8.58 per student. The WSU is a member of several national organisations including the New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations (NZUSA); University Sport of New Zealand (USNZ); Te Mana

ADMINISTRATION:

EVENTS AND ACTIVITIES: $11.13

NATIONAL REPRESENTATION $8.58 ORIENTATION: $7.97 SCHOLARSHIPS: $1.65

CLUBS: $6.60 ADVOCACY AND HARDSHIP: $8.69

$18.92 per student.

Administration is the heart of any organization and consequently takes up a major portion of any organisation’s budget and these costs are partially funded by our income generation of $129,000 per year. Administration covers everything from photocopying and staffing, to insurance, legal costs, and auditing which helps keep us accountable and transparent to you! Akonga (TMA); and Student Job Search (SJS).

SPORTING ACTIVITIES: $6.27

PICTURE LOG WSU Pool Party 28th March 2009

14

OPEN: 8.30am-4.30pm PHONE: 07 856 9139 WEB: www.wsu.org.nz 15

YOUR: WSU

DIRECTOR’S INTRODUCTIONS

Charlie Gillard:International Students Hello everyone! For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Charlie Gillard and I am the International Students’ Officer on the 2010 WSU Board of Directors.

I’m currently in my sixth year of study towards a conjoint honours degree in management and law, majoring in law, international

have a passion for helping international students make the most of their time at Waikato as in 2007 I studied on exchange in the Netherlands.

My key goal for 2010 is to make sure that all students, whether international or domestic, thoroughly enjoy their time at

Noho Marae: a trip designed for international students to experience authentic Maori culture. If you have any

management and public relations.

By now, though, you’re quite possibly looking at my photo and thinking ‘he doesn’t look like an international student’. Either that or you’re trying to guess my age. Well, the truth is that I am not an international student at Waikato and I am currently 23 (and married, my beautiful wife tells me I have to add). I do, however,

Waikato and are taken seriously when they have concerns. I intend to run a few events (hopefully in conjunction with the international centre) which will encourage greater integration of domestic and international students and which will develop links between outbound and inbound exchange students. I will also be working with Luke (our VP Maori) on arranging

great ideas of your own (or you’re just keen to help out with any international-related events), please email me at international@ wsu.org.nz!

Apart from that, I wish you all the best for 2010! Please do get in contact with me if you have any suggestions, ideas or comments.

DIRECTOR’S INTRODUCTIONS

Glen Delamere:GBLT A..B..

C..D..

GLBT..

X..Y..and Z, No it’s not a new alphabet! It’s my portfolio for 2010, Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender.

For those of you who were unaware I am Glen Delamere and I am your nominated Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender representative on the WSU to advocate on students’ behalf. Here at Waikato University we have an active GLBT social and support group called ASKEW which is open to all students. If you want 16

to get involved (or just learn more about ASKEW) then check out their website at www.hamiltonpride. co.nz/askew.html or flick them an email at askew.waikato@gmail. com. You can also contact me on vp@wsu.org.nz.

This year I will be attending some ASKEW meetings and holding a consultation for students after the April recess to get some feedback on the student experience here at Waikato University. Are you happy?

What more can the WSU do to help? Flick me an email if you have any comments.

In B Semester I aim to be assisting with ensuring that we have a successful Pride Week: previous

Pride Week Events have included Handbag throwing on the Village Green and Queens on Campus where I discovered what a bitch walking in heels is and what a scary drag queen I would be. I don’t know how you ladies do it on a regular basis, but you have my respect.

I will also be liaising throughout the year with some of the other Universities and Polytechnics Student Unions/Associations to steal any ideas which will be of benefit for our students here at Waikato. Finally one of my aims for this year is to ensure that unlike the Little Britain series we don’t have only one gay in the village.

Vagina Monologues Auditions Do you love vaginas? Well here at the WSU, we sure do, and we’re providing you with the opportunity to tell the world... well, the rest of campus at least. Auditions for the 2010 WSU production of The Vagina Monologues are on their way

Audition Info Auditions take place in the Guru Room, 1pm on Wednesday 10th March For more information email womens@wsu.org.nz

RANDOM:MAGIC

Magic 8-Ball Does anyone care about the Winter Olympics?

Without a Doubt But unfortunately, those people who do care are the athletes. A guy had to die for regular folks to pay any attention! It seems the Winter Olympics will always be the Ashlee Simpson of sports, constantly trying to keep up with its cooler, more popular big sibling.

Is wearing leopard-print a sign of ‘easiness’?

Signs Point to Yes Ever watched Rock of Love? Who hasn’t, in secret, revelled in the spoils of a fame-whoring hair-rock has-been. Not only is the show a brilliant and accurate portrayal of white trash life, it is also a useful social tool. The more animal print a girl wears, the quicker they are

to get in to Bret Michaels’ pants. Now that’s a reliable source.

Is 3D cinema just a phase?

Outlook Good While Scorsese likens it to the introduction of

Should I take up another language?

Reply Hazy, Try Again Before I answer I need more information, such

this technology to the introduction of Colour of Sound, he should be likening it to training montages or Smell-o-vision. Soon enough no one will care. And forget about the introduction of 3D capable television. We won’t win a game of cricket just because it was brought to us in cooperation with Universal studios. Plus those glasses look totally stupid.

Who wants to wear them in their longue?

as which language will it be? If it’s something central European, like Italian or French, then my reply is yes, it’s a great way to pick people up.

However, if you were thinking of taking up Latin or one of the African plains languages, forget it.

Not only are these impractical wastes of time (I mean really, how is Latin even useful these days?), but whispering sweet nothings to your partner in Zulu isn’t going to get you anywhere.

A+ TEXTBOOKS

New & Secondhand Textbooks CONTACT DETAILS Address:141 Knighton Road Phone: 07 856 1077 Email: aplus@aplustextbooks.co.nz

17

Lettuce F-YOU BEEFCAKES

Write to Win! SEND LETTERS TO: Send your letters to editor@ nexusmag.co.nz

WEEKLY PRIZE: The letter which we choose to be the best each week wins a $20 Bennett’s voucher!

FORUM LETTERS: Letters may also be sent via the letters thread at forums. nexusmag.co.nz.

We always have space for more letters, whether it’s a complaint or a high five or

LETTERS POLICY: Nexus welcomes and encourages debate through the letters page, serious or not. Letters should be received by Wednesday 5pm on the week prior to publication.

We’ll print basically any letter, but the editor reserves the right to abridge or refuse correspondence.

We won’t correct your spelling and grammar either, so it’s up to you how much of an idiot you look like. Pseudonyms are okay (all correspondence must include your real name and contact details – they won’t be printed if you don’t want them to be). Send letters to nexus@waikato.ac.nz

18 18

Beefcakes are the bane of my life. For those of you who are unaware of what a beefcake is then let me explain. First off you may notice them through their garish attire, which includes wannabe designer sunglasses. Not cool. Next off we have the levis pre-ripped, bleached brigade. This look is totally inane and outdated, I wish, hope and pray that it would just go away.

For the upper body torso region the uniform designated to the beefcake must be an industrial printed logo of something that was a brand that your grandparents would have used to possibly polish their ornaments or whatever they did before hardcore fetishes were around. My point here being that you’re wearing something that is a totally absurd and meaningless, for example would you wear a t-shirt that advertised Janola bleach? No that would be ridiculous, and to drive my message home, I am lead to presume that anyone who wears something that they are oblivious to

must not think and ergo must be lacking of any mental capacity.

Fake tans are the disguise of the beefcake.

Insecurity that you maybe of a fairer complexion than what is the desired tone, leads people to use this abomination to mankind. I personally have more respect for people who are themselves and do not conform to the idealistic model that our society has created. Be yourself it’s all you can do.

It’s all smoke and mirrors, historically and factually it has been proven that bodybuilders are nowhere near the strength that people assume, all this intimidation says to me is that mummy didn’t hug me, or alternatively daddy hugged me and I got tingly somewhere.

Love That Asshole from Your Class

DO YOU LOVE VAGINAS? Do you love vaginas? Well here at the WSU, we sure do, and we’re providing you with the opportunity to tell the world... well, the rest of campus at least. Auditions for the 2010 WSU production of The Vagina Monologues are on their way. The Monologues, written by Eve Ensler, is the product of hundreds of interviews with women, in which they talked about their views on sex, relationships, violence against women, and other vagina related issues. The Monologues are all about taking pride in being a woman, and empowering others to feel the same. All profits from the performances will go to the national charity Power to Women and

Girls of Democratic Republic of Congo, and another local women’s charity. If this sounds like you, come to a meeting in the Guru Room (to the left inside the WSU Building, ask at reception if you’re lost!) at 1pm on Wednesday 10th March. Unfortunately guys, this is a girls only show, but if you are keen to help out backstage we would love to have you.

If you have any queries, email me at womens@wsu.org.nz.

Kate Magazinovic – WSU Women’s Office

YOUR: LETTUCE

BEARDS ARE AWESOME Dear Nexus, I don’t know how familiar the members of your staff are with the slang the kids use these days, but the word “beard” is often used to describe a woman who appears to date a closet gay guy. See, beards have always been symbols of power. The reason Hitler was such a douche was most likely the absence of a beard. That and

Facial hair implies masculinity.

With beard, you are manly.

Without beard, you are nothing. Nexus, you have shaved your beard, and using deductive reasoning (or inductive reasoning, I forget

the killing of mostly innocent Jewish people, I suppose. Gandalf had a beard, Tom Selleck had a sweet moustache, and Justin Timberlake is rarely seen without his designer stubble.

What I’m trying to say is that the beard is supposedly a symbol of hetero-goodness.

which), I have determined that you have lost your power, your manliness, and most probably are gay.

Yours hirsutely, Harry Henderson.

Txts to the Editor!

Nexus now has a non-new TXT-in service! Send Letters to the Editor - via text - to 021 235 8436.

Don’t forget: You can send Busted pictures in by pxt! Send us your best snaps of you or your mates in Busted-type situations to 021 235 8436.

CHOCOLATE FISH ARE AWESOME Dear Editor, If you could be a darl and pass on to ‘A Loving Theist’ something for me I would be most appreciative.

That is if I ever see this person kick a poor, little Christian in the groin I will personally walk up to them and do the very same thing back to them, then knee them in the face and kick them in the ribs while they’re down. I’m not religious so I don’t have to try and be Christlike but I do have a lot of Christian friends so I’m going to take it upon myself to defend their honour! If we non-religious folk, who choose not to smoke, still have to deal with all you smokers puffing your cancer sticks in our faces, then you can handle a few Christian missionaries sharing what they believe is truth. If we non-religious folk, who choose not to drink, still have to deal with your partners booze-induced-puke on our shoes at 2am in Outback, then you can handle a few Christian missionaries handing out pass

along cards. And if we non-religious folk, who choose not to sleep around with everyone on our dorm floor and then still have to comfort our friends because of the chlamydia you gave them, then I think you can handle a few, harmless Christians, giving up their own time to spread a little cheer and happiness as well as FREE chocolate. Now they would never say any of this to you because you’ve probably got your head stuck in some book on atheism and look like a paedophile but because my soul’s already damned for hell I’m going to speak up for them.

When you’re lying on your death bed I want you to tell me how comforting those theories, degrees and certificates of yours are then I’ll see you on the other side and we can have a jolly good time together. Otae?

Peace out home boy (or girl...don’t want to seem prejudice now) and CHRISTIANS RULES!!! Keep handing out those free chocolate fishes guys! xx

THE NEXUS LETTER OF THE WEEK WINS A $20 BOOK VOUCHER FROM BENNETTS WAIKATO UNIVERSITY BOOKSHOP!

PH 07 856 6813

FAX 07 856 2255

ADDRESS Gate 5 Hillcrest Road

MOVIE QUOTES ARE AWESOME To A Theist What you’ve wrote is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever read. At no point in your rambling, attention-whoring, incoherent letter were you even close to anything that could be considered an original, unbiased thought. Everyone that read your letter is now dumber for having done so. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul.

Billy Madison

WAIKATO UNIVERSITY BOOKSHOP

EMAIL wku@bennetts.co.nz 19 19

NOTICES BOARD

The Nexus Noticeboard Lifestyle Lawns Free Quotes. Lawnmowing.

Rubbish Removal. Section Tidyups.

Weed Spraying and more.

Student/Staff discount just mention this ad.

Ph Lenny at Lifestyle Lawns (07)8501871/027 533 1033

Want to make some money and drink as much piss as you want?

Then this job is for you! A local cricket club want two girls to accompany them on their end of season bus tour, acting as bar maids. The trip is on the 10th of April and will kick off at 10am, going to about 10pm. You’ll have

then contact us. wussnz@yahoo. com.

lenny@lifestylelawns.net.nz

the run of the drinks and get paid for your time! For more info, contact rayjamesnz@gmail.com as quick as you can, because this job is going to get taken pretty fast.

how to have a good time, and relaxed at the same time! 3 guys and 1 girl in house. Takes less than 30secs to S.O.E and a minute to village greens!

Text me to view the house! Need someone urgent! 0272511996.

Native German and Spanish speaker offering tutoring in those languages. I have lived in both Chile and Deutschland and am doing a bachelor’s degree at Waikato. Please call Gerrit Haas: 0211107232.

Waikato University Secret Society.

If you have a sense of humour and a desire to take over the world

Flatmate wanted!

We have a mint house loctaed directly accross from gate 4.

5 beedroom house, $110.00 a week includes rent, phone and unlimited broadband. Must know

SEND YOUR NOTICES TO: Send notices to notices@nexusmag.co.nz before Wednesday, 5 pm. Placing notices is free for students. We don’t always have much space, so get in quick!

Graduate Programmes Accounting / Technical / Leadership

Be Every You The Telecom Graduate Programmes are designed to make that happen. So you can keep more options open, you can express yourself and you can find out exactly where you really want to go. Apply now.

www. telecom. co. nz/graduates

20 +5 *UDGXDWH 5HFUXLW $G 1H[XV [ LQGG

TPM471 Nexus (Waikato) 02.2010

You want to be open to every possibility, realise your strengths, grow and explore everything.

30

Tuesday The first 100 people to buy 6 Tui handles this week get a

f ree

Wednesday

People wearing these shirts get

and go in the draw to win a Tui flatpack valued at over $1000.

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

2 for $12 Vodka Redbulls 2 for $15 Jagerbombs

For cheaper fares get yourself a BUSIT! card.

STUDY Lots of routes to and from uni.

Catch the Night Rider on a Friday or Saturday night.

CHEAP Return trip free!!

WORK AND PLAY Cheap travel across the Waikato.

For more information visit www.busit.co.nz or phone 0800 4 BUSLINE (2875463)

SAFE Security on board.

NIGHTRIDER

FEATURE FUN

Hamilton.

For many of you this is the new frontier. Gone are the days of hanging out on the high school playgrounds, the satisfaction of mum’s cooking and the security of your local main street. Gone are the bars you used to sneak in to, the trees you used to hide under, the lakes you used to swim in.

Here is a list of top five’s from Nexus staff to help you survive the Tron.

Student Bars 1. Bar101 – Fairly new on the scene this

3. The Cook – Nearby, this is a great place to

bar touts itself as the real deal for students.

Good if you want to look at pictures of the Tui Brewery and cows.

2. The Outback Inn – this place has been the institution of horny students for 15 years.

Expanded a few years back, you can get lost in its myriad of dancing stages. This place can get packed so be prepared to be felt up.

lax out. Be warned though – you may bump in to your professor, your neighbour or your mum.

4. Pie Lab – dirt-cheap drinks and pies. What a hell of a combination. But don’t go to the toilets.

Just don’t.

5. Access – for the bogans out there. This is the place that caters for anything of the classic rock persuasion.

25

FEATURE FUN

Cheap Eats 1. Wong’s Kitchen – just tastes so good and it’s cheap as hell.

2. The supermarket – buy and prepare your own food….or not.

3. Royal Indian Restaurant – cheap, good and good range of booze. Great when you are

getting ready for a night on the town, or trying to recover from a night on the town.

4. Gauras – On campus and good for you. All vegie, all the time.

5. Victoria St – hang around until people leave their tables. Swoop in and enjoy their leftovers.

Road Trips 1. Raglan – everyone should get a little black

4. Waihi – If you can handle the windy road to

.sand in their togs.

2. Pirongia –History, a national park and a pretty walkway all in one.

3. South Waikato – the place to hide out, according to news editor Grant Burns. Bush, tracks and dams. What more could you ask for?

get here (take mints and a barf bag) then this is a sleepy local to relax in when you should be studying.

5. Auckland – But only if you’re desperate.

This sprawling urban giant is but a mere one and a half hours away.

Things to keep you entertained 1. The drunks and bogan kids in Garden Place

4. Hot Asian girl debating – park yourself

– pull up a pew and people watch. This will keep you entertained for at least 20 minutes.

2. Dancing around the Riff-raff statue. It’s amazing how a $100,000 brass knob can keep on giving and giving.

3. Floating down Waikato river – watch out for the cow-shit, the tree branches and occasional dead bodies.

outside your house and rate the girls that go by.

Question: is she hot because she is hot – or is she hot because she is Asian and dressed like that?

5. Hot Brown boy hunting – as above but for the ladies.

Places to met new people

26

1. Class – where else will you meet people

4. In the halls – Ahh, the halls. How we love

your age, interested in the same topics as you, new to the city and bored? It’s a fantastic mix 2. Outside momento – ahhhh, caffine addictions. It is enough to unite the masses.

3. Under the bridge – bring your own blanket and you’re sweet.

thee. You won’t just meet new people; you’ll discover new diseases as well.

5. Bus Shelter – we are all on a journey. Why not meet a few people along the way.

FEATURE FUN

Places to explore 1. Hamilton Gardens - Go after dark and dodge the security guy.

2. Melville – this is walking on the wild side.

Are you up for the challenge?

3. The hospital – just go have a look. It’s all the excitement of ER without the drama and

complicated love lives. Hell, you may have to come here anyway after exploring Melville.

4. University campus – you never know, you might make it to class on time.

5. The Zoo - if you can find it and if the animals are awake.

Places to study 1. The library – if you don’t mind the

4. Lectures you’re not interested in - look

jackhammers 2. The Village Green – but don’t count on the study part. You’ll be interrupted by your friends and by the Christians trying to convert you.

3. Momento café – again, don’t count on the study….but there’s coffee!

busy and get other work done.

5. Home - who would have thought it. This is possibly the best place to get work done, feed yourself and maybe even meet new people all in one.

Places you don’t want to find yourself on a Sunday morning 1. In the river – though it may not be you who does the finding.

2. A mattress on the floor in a house in Melville - though at this point you may have other things to worry about.

3. In the cells – because who hasn’t found themselves there at least once during university.

4. Next to your ex – it’s not a nice place to be.

5. In the emergency waiting room – you may have arrived from Melville at midnight but you will still be waiting on Sunday morning.

Scandals Nexus has experienced 1.

Having all our magazines stolen. Seriously.

Possibly by someone who was mentally challenged and thought stealing a magazine meant there’d be no more magazine.

2. Getting in trouble for baby sex jokes last year and losing Burger Fuel sponsorship.

3. Hunting a Nazi and showing that Waikato university doesn’t care too much for free speech all of the time.

4. Having all the computers stolen by the student union way back in the 90s.

5. Art running naked through campus at some point in 2010

27

RANDOM:ARTS

48 Hour Film Madness is Coming!

By Paul Barlow

I’m lucky I have such an awesome job – I get to watch as the city comes alive with mad film makers for one weekend a year. It’s great to be able to see how imaginative and brilliant our creative community in Hamilton can be and to be attached to a competition with such a brilliant track record is a great honour.

Not many film competitions can boast entrants that have gone on to make award winning shows, feature films, garner the attention of Hollywood and even get nominated for an Academy Award, but the hardcore extreme film making venture that is the V 48 Hours can. The largest film making competition in the Southern Hemisphere, the V 48 Hours is in its 8th year nationally and its 5th year in Hamilton.

Each year thousands of people work like mad to write, shoot, cut and survive 2 full days of film making, made even more difficult by the requirement of three random elements, a prop, a line of dialogue, and a character who has a specific character trait. Added to the mix is a genre,

Was I taken advantage of?

Martha woke up in someone else’s bed and was too drunk to know exactly what had happened. What can she do?

Martha needs to see a doctor to see if sex has taken place. If it has, she can ask for the morning after pill from the doctor or a chemist. She can also make a complaint to the police and will need as much proof as possible that sex has taken place. If she was too drunk to remember what happened informed consent was not given, a rape may have been committed. There are various support groups she could contact. Ask the CAB for a list.

The Hamilton Area Citizens Advice Bureau provides advice and information from four locations. They are 55 Victoria Street, 70 Kent Street in Frankton, Garden Place and the Cowshed at the University. They also have legal, advocacy and consumer services available where you can get more specialised help.

28

randomly pulled from a hat mere minutes before the weekend starts that the film must adhere to.

To help we give the teams free stuff, including V, our name sponsor who are awesome. You will need the V. There’s a lot of cool other stuff too but to find out you should join up and come to the launch.

It’s a lot to take on board and the stress can lead to massive fights or lifelong friendships, but adding to the stress this year for the Hamilton entrants are an additional 150000 potential extras and an ever-present buzzing in the air – since the shoot weekend is also the same weekend the V8’s are on.

It means sound design is going to be a huge factor for teams in the city, and it’s something the brilliant judges will be watching for. This year our judges include the Deputy Mayor of Hamilton city, a lecturer at the University of Waikato, an expert in all things art house and me.

Last year Hamilton was the centre that improved the most from its previous years entrants, something clicked, planets aligned, children were sacrificed to some pagan god, and as a result Hamilton made some awesome shit – we had zombie romances, killer rocks, evil twins, dancing hitmen, an education in pall bearing and freaky invisible clowns from a parallel universe.

In fact the freaky clowns won it for Hamilton, the second win in a row for team Guerrilla Monkeys. This year they’ll be back defending their title, but to win they’ll need to rise above the competitive spirit mutating between Wintec and the Uni. This year the Uni is playing host to our launch and finish at the fantastic Wel Energy Academy of Performing Arts, and have got something of a home advantage. Wintec students, who made up half of last year’s top 12 films for the region, have already issued the challenge – this isn’t the V 48 Hours film theory competition and Wintec is going to kick ass!

Ok, enough rambling – here’s the summary – You have two days to make one film that has three random elements, (a prop, a line of dialogue and a character), you get given your genre (always fear musical!) and free stuff to help you survive the two days. Stress, sweat, cry and freak out until you get your film back. Don’t be late – I get uncomfortable when people cry after missing out by 30 seconds.

RANDOM:PRIZE

REVIEW:CAFE

The Loud American’s Cafe Review

By Mackenzie McCarty

Entering this rather large cafe is a lesson in acoustics. Although only about a third of the seats are filled on this particular Friday afternoon, the noise is overwhelming and my boyfriend and I resort to a moderate yell in order to hear each other over the din of dishes, conversations, and esspresso machine.

We survey the a la carte optionsthere aren’t many, but this is probably because it’s a little late in the day. I order a polenta bruschetta with charred eggplant, cherry tomatoes, feta and basil, and a regular mocha- all of which comes to a total of $17.50 (polenta is an Italian substance made out of crushed cornmeal, which is cooked in a pot and then, in this case, shaped into little cakes and mixed with cheeses and herbs).

He orders a bacon and egg “BAP,” (not sure what BAP stands for- but it’s basically just a bacon and egg sandwich on flashy bread). His costs $10.

The service is undeniably friendly, and after seating ourselves on cow-hide stools in the corner of the cafe, we wait only a short time for our food. At this point, we are immediately struck by two things: the dishes are extraordinarily

colorful (purple basil!) and small.

This latter detail turns out not to be a problem for me, however, as polenta is extremely fillingexpecially this one, which has been stuffed with pine nuts and feta cheese and oozes with olive oil so that when I am done, my face is as greased as a competitor in a body building comp. I am unable to finish, but my boyfriend (still hungry) is more than happy to lend a fork.

The coffee is lovely, a little bitter but very nicely mixed with a great froth. I am annoyed by the fact that this particular one comes in a glass though, rather than a mug, as this means that I have to wrap a napkin around it before I can drink the thing or else risk blistered fingers. Nevertheless, it’s a good coffee, and that can’t be argued with. This is a good place for a light brunch, but don’t necessarily count on it to hold its own when it comes to feeding boys at lunch time- and be prepared to spend a bit of money.

Domino’s Pizza $12.90 Value Giveaway You can’t buy much these days for $12.90. Perhaps two beers if you’re lucky or half a CD! Domino’s Pizza is bringing back value – now you can get any two large pizzas from Domino’s Classic Value range for $12.90 pick up.

Nexus has vouchers to give away so you can sample any two of the Classic Value Range pizzas for free!

We have 10 vouchers to give away.

To enter, tell us who you’re going to share your two pizzas with and why and send your contact details to nexus@waikato.ac.nz

Your community needs you, please become a blood donor You could become a new blood donor if you’re aged between 16 and 60, have good health and weigh at least 50kgs. It has to be 6 months since having a tattoo or piercing We will be on campus next week doing our collect so if you’d like to give blood, visit the New Zealand Blood Service at the University Rec Centre.

Date:9th - 11th March, 10am – 2.30pm 12th March, 10am – 1.30pm

0800 GIVE BLOOD www.nzblood.co.nz

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COLUMNS

TIPS101

Blair Is Ace

Lecture 1: How to stop your shit from getting stolen.

You know, when Big Man Robinson asked me to write for Nexus again, I spanked the nostalgia monkey. University has just started again, and I can’t help but remember when I was just a first-year at the tender age of 17.

By Hollie Jackson

If you’re a student, chances are you live in Hillcrest. Chances are, if you live in Hillcrest, you will be robbed. At least once. Maybe even twice, depending how long it takes for you to learn your lesson. That 2km radius around the University is a goldmine for thieves, so here are some inexpensive tips to prevent your goods ending up in the hands of some random who will sell it for meth. #1: Shut your curtains.

This especially applies when you leave your abode, whether day or night. If thieves see nice big flat screens sitting all lonely in your lounge, it won’t be there for long. However, if you have absolute crap in your flat (ie, a TV that looks like it may have just been the first ever invented), by all means, leave the blinds open. Not even the lowest of crims would want to set foot in your flat. #2: Hide anything valuable.

From past experience, burglars usually just take what they can see and easily run off with. When you go out to catch the clap from the man and lady whores in town, put your iPod, camera, wallet, laptop... anything small and worth stealing underneath your dirty washing, bed, or in the drawers you keep your dads old porno mags in. #3: Buy crappier things.

Instead of that flash new 50” plasma you want to get on HP, buy some chunky second-hand job that has the same screen size but just needs at least 4 people to carry. It’s cheaper, and it probably won’t get stolen anytime soon. #4: Buy a desktop PC, not a fucking laptop!

Desktop PC = big and chunky. Laptop = small, pretty, expensive, and easy to nick. Another thing with computers is to remember to lock them with passwords. This won’t stop the thieves from taking it, but at least they won’t be able to see all your naked photos of you and your girlfriend.

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With Blair Munrovia

First-years, I know you. I know you better than you know yourself. I know that a large portion of you will have ideals, and an idea of how things should be. I am here to tell you, as your future self, that you are wrong. Your high-school notions of learning are the opposite of correct.

You may not notice this, but tertiary education has a way of changing who you are. Shit, you might get lucky and actually learn how to learn.

Look around you. University is a battlefield, full of pitfalls designed to weed out the sick and ill-equipped. You are the buffalo, we are the lions. See the eyes of the survivors, the thousand-yard stare of the ones with the lines on their faces. These are the people who have stared into the abyss, and had the abyss stare back. Everywhere around you are traps. There are banks, trying to rope you into applying for “interest-free” overdrafts. I got one of these overdrafts some two years ago, and though I’m still studying, the metaphorical sharks take a nice juicy bite out of my pale financial ass.

Even worse are the Christian groups on campus. I mean, you like music, right? You’d like to win a free iPod, right? And some free iTunes, I bet. Yeah, here you go, have a nice day. Oh, but before you leave, we want to talk to you about Jesus, and because we’ve been so nice to you, it’d be really rude of you to not come along to our meetings, and listen to Preachy McGodbother.

I’m generally fine with religious people. Especially the ones who are familiar with the Eleventh Commandment, “Thou shalt shut the fuck up about your own beliefs unless I ask!”

COLUMNS

The Idiot Report

I’m free...and hungry

Since starting this column last week, I’ve already had foreboding doubt pacing through my head. Some would say its cause my editor keeps sending me deadline threats with increased frequency. And others would say it’s because these threats are getting more and more sexually perverse and explicit than the last one. He sends me disturbing 4chan worthy pictures all the time. No, it has been more of the thought that I simply won’t have enough material to stretch out a year’s worth of material for this column.

You’ve left the halls, moved into your flat and now you have to navigate the world of paying power, internet, rent and buying your own food... all within the limited budget that StudyLink, work or parents permit. So now that you’re free, what are you going to eat?

I once camped for a week with a group of friends. After the first night, we made a fire on the beach, pulled out some eggs, noodles, flour, sugar and a few other bits, then sat down to cook. The girl cooking for the morning tipped it all into the frying pan, with water, and started cooking. One of the guys took a look, this being the first time he had met her, and asked if she lived in a flat. She did. How did he know?

“Because if you live in a flat, anything can be cooked in a frying pan.”

There’s a few things to take into consideration when cooking in a flat.

Are you buying and cooking only for yourself, or is everyone chipping in a cooking together? What’s the budget? What are we actually going to eat?

These are some basics you should always have in the cupboard/ fridge/freezer: Tomato sauce Canned tomatoes Eggs A bag of pasta A bag of spaghetti pasta A bag of rice Mixed veges Vegetable stock Flour Vinegar Soy sauce Sugar Mince Cheese Milk These ingredients can be used in different combinations to make two different pasta meals, spaghetti bolognese, stir fry with sweet and sour sauce, fried rice, or mince pasta bake, and probably more if I put the effort in to thinking about it. With these, you’ll never be stuck with only one option for dinner.

Pro-tip for girls from a guy friend: Tights aren’t pants. Don’t treat them as such.

By Some Homeless Chinese Guy

But silence ye nagging thoughts in my brain and go back to considering the pros and cons my editor’s balls, for I should never have doubted the eternal stupidity of the human race in providing ample fodder. And deliver it did.

Beginning with the very tragic news of the 8.8 magnitude earthquake in Chile destroying many homes and lives. What happened there exactly was no joking matter and my heart goes out to the victims and all their families with sincerity.

No, what bares the grunt of my gripe began the next day as reports around the world began warning of tsunamis racing across the Pacific Ocean, placing nations in and around it on tsunami alerts.

But what did I read the next day after hearing that our own slice of this earth was put on tsunami alert? Warnings heeded? Shores evacuated? Mass panic and looting in the streets? No. People flocking to beaches so they could ‘get a look’.

How fucking retarded.

Well okay, the waves only ended up being a metre or two in height and inconsequential at most, I’ll give them that. But at the time this was a bloody tsunami warning people.

As much as I’d like to award the prestigious ‘idiot of the week’ title to these retards of safety. I can’t. For there is a bigger sucker out there and more deserving.

And that good people, is Mother fucking Nature.

By the Dumb Blonde

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COLUMNS

Fashion Police

Auteur House

The tradition of the lack of clothing worn by first years are carried on without fail this year. It’s great to see a tradition flourish at the beginning of every semester, but what’s not so great is seeing what you ate last night, thanks to your super mini skirt. I’m not going to bitch about what you chose to wear because I know there will be many of you that will write to the editor regarding clothing attire…..or the lack off. If you’re going to look slutty then try and pull it off, rather than make the guys think how fast they can pull it off.

The actress and star Loretta Young was possibly the biggest hypocrite of Hollywood’s golden age. A self consciously devout Catholic, her piety was such that she found it difficult to even say the word ‘divorce’ on screen. Yet, as is often the way, her private behaviour hardly squared with her public morals. Twice divorced herself, Young was something of a ‘goer’ in her youth, eloping at 17 with a man 9 years her senior and, infamously, having a ‘love child’ with married fellow star Clark Gable after the two got it on whilst on location for the aptly titled “Call of the Wild” (1935).

With the Kartal Cartel

Ladies, you can deny it all you want but when you get dressed in the morning for uni you wouldn’t like to be mistaken for a frigid choir girl.

Deep down inside you long to be that hot bitch that brings all the boys to the yard, although you would never risk compromising the image of the smart, sophisticated lass you are.

So what do you do? You dress sexy. Actually, you call it sexy, others call it slutty. One of my personal favorites: the low cleavage. If you have a delicious pair of lady lumps to parade around. The golden rule is the smaller your breasts, the lower the cleavage, whereas a C cup and up should only be hinting at the goods, not make the little boys cry. Got some nice legs and junk in the trunk? Miniskirts are totally fine but when you leave nothing to the imagination when you walk up some stairs, that’s a bit too much. You like to guess what size the guy’s penis is by looking at the pants he wears. Let him guess as well. Come on ladies, no one is telling you not to look hot. Just don’t look like you got your get up from a hooker’s outlet store on K Rd. Have a great O-Week and hope to see less vadge!

P.S You little Asian girls keep wearing whatever you’re wearing because it makes me giggle.

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With Richard Swainson

Because of the morals clause in both Young’s and Gable’s contracts they could not openly acknowledge their daughter. Young hid the pregnancy, placing off-spring Judy Lewis in an orphanage for two years before she felt confident enough to adopt her own child. It didn’t help matters that Lewis was the spitting image of Gable, with his trade mark stick-out ears. Surgery was the only option for them, something Young subjected Lewis to at age seven. She did not, however, tell the girl about her parentage until two decades later.

Auteur House stocks three of Young’s films, including the movie that she is most likely to be remembered for: “The Stranger” (1946), the only commercial hit of Orson Welles’ directorial career. Young plays a perfect wife, albeit one who has inadvertently married a Nazi war criminal. Her dress sense is impeccable, anticipating her small screen success as a stylish clothes horse in the 1950s.

The real Loretta Young - the one she worked so hard to repress - is on show in “Born to Be Bad” (1934). Cast as a good time girl who has a child out of wedlock at 15, Young is devastating. Cavorting around half naked, seducing nice guy Cary Grant under the very nose of his character’s wife, it is hard to think of a sexier 1930s performance.

Gable must have had a fine old time of it in the woods.

YOUR BUSTED PHOTOS STEP ONE: Party STEP TWO: Take pictures STEP THREE: Email them to us at busted@nexusmag.co.nz Seriously, do it! It can’t be that hard, people are (apparently) partying here all the time.

Embarrass your friends!

Display your ugly mug!

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REVIEW:COMIC

Fables Bill Willingham Reviewed by Jizzle my Lizzle Crizzle The Fables series of comic books is based around the characters from the fables and the fairytales you read or listened to as a child, but they aren’t where they used to be anymore. I fell in love with the series a couple of years ago after being very unsure of the comic book thing, but now am totally convinced and if I were rich I would go and buy them all. I’ve read the ones I’ve had at least 3 times each, and while trying to write this have been totally distracted by staring at the art work which is amazing and have wanted to start reading from the beginning again.

The premise is this: All the fairytale people used to live in their own world, but now they can’t because of The Adversary (pretty much Sauron crossed with Darth Vader) and his invasion of their homelands. So they fled to our world, the Mundane World, in which they have to pass as ordinary when really they are anything but. Now the residents of Fabletown hide in plain sight in New York City and those who can’t pass as human (like the Three Little Pigs) live on The Farm. As for the human characters, Prince Charming is really anything but charming, living off his conquests and

mourning his lost fortunes. Beauty and the Beast are still married. Jack of Fables– who climbed the beanstalk and climbed up the hill with Jill is a dirty con artist out to do anything for a buck. Snow White and Rose Red (of Little Red Riding Hood fame) are sisters who hate each other most of the time. Bigby, The Big Bad Wolf has reformed from his huffing and puffing ways and is now sheriff of Fabletown.

The stories told in Fables are both old and new and gradually you come to know just why the community had to flee, what happened after the stories you read as a kid ended, and it introduces other older stories – some of the not so common fairytales and fables which are generally a little creepy. Like one where Jack puts the Grim Reaper in a bag so he won’t die, but then no one and nothing else can die, and it gets pretty gross. These different elements are put together so that nothing detracts from the story as a whole, it just adds bits to what you know about the characters and their universe both before and after they became refugees.

The story of Fables is epic, because they don’t age it spans all of time, the characters are interesting and well developed - they have human flaws, romances, political coups, and all of the things which applied to them in the homelands still apply in their new home, so sleeping beauty will still sleep whenever she pricks her finger. The art can be stared at for hours, and everything just links together so well. To get the full picture reading from the beginning helps, but even as a one off they make a great read.

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REVIEW:GAMES

Heavy on story, light on convention Heavy Rain is unlike any other game you’ve played. It’s a classic murder mystery. It’s an Interactive Drama. It’s highly experimental.

And that’s damn refreshing for an old gamer like me.

Four characters are linked to ‘The Origami Killer’ a serial killer who kidnaps and drowns children. As

The game uses motion-captured actors, near-photorealistic graphics and its own control system - a combination of simple analogue stick movements and contextual button prompts. Moving characters around their environment can lack finesse at times, but the PS3’s motion controller is intuitively

experience. And the musical score

by Normand Corbeil is a haunting exploration of tension, tragedy and terror.

Heavy Rain will challenge you.

Your reactions. Your memory.

Your ability to empathise with its characters. Your very conception of what a game IS. But not all

suspects are eliminated the truth begins to unravel and trust me - that truth will surprise you. Each choice you make can potentially change the outcome of the story.

I’ve been through the game twice and I’ve seen characters die (and the story continue without them), and I saw new scenes unfold and different endings play out.

implemented and one of the game’s interactive highlights.

David Cage - Heavy Rain’s creator and writer, is clearly nutty for film. There are nods to the great directors – Hitchcock, Kubrick and Wells to name a few – but it’s fans of great psycho-thrillers like Seven, Psycho and Silence of the Lambs that will truly appreciate the

games feature a jumping Italian Plumber. And not all games require you to kill everything in your path.

And although it’s still early days for emotionally aware, purely story-driven video games, Heavy Rain wears its passions proudly on its sleeve. It’s a meditation on the potential future of cinematic storytelling.

But it won’t be for everyone. It’s a Rorschach test for gamers: what you take into Heavy Rain will largely determine what you take away from it.

Starcraft 2 Pre-Look With Lil’ Davey Nixon I’ve been playing Blizzard’s classic fantasy real time strategy game (RTS) Warcraft 3 again recently.

Personally Warcraft 3 is the standard by which all other RTS games are judged, despite being almost 8 years old. Although it looks dated now, there is something about its gameplay that brings me back time and again.

While Warcraft 3 remains my favorite RTS to this day, it naturally is not Blizzard’s only foray into the RTS genre. AS\side from the earlier Warcraft titles there is also Starcraft, a sci-fi RTS similar in gameplay to Warcraft, released in 1998 (making it positively prehistoric as far as games go).

When Starcraft first emerged it

raised the bar for all RTS game from then on, not because it deviated from the status quo but because it perfected the formula.

Even now Starcraft has a large competitive following. In South Korea its a national past-time in the same way rugby is here with matches broadcast on national TV. But now Blizzard has decided to update the Starcraft franchise.

Starcraft 2 is currently in beta testing. Those with even a passing interest in RTS gaming are waiting to see if the company that created the benchmark RTS can do it again. Starcraft was once a standard but times have changed and now it’s getting plain old.

And from what I’ve seen so far of Starcraft 2 I’m a little underwhelmed. I’ve been watching some replays and it looks pretty but lacking innovation compared to good ol’ Warcraft 3. Seeing as theres no heros its pretty much the RTS equivalent of drunkenly smashing fists together. The game also features more turtling (hiding behind base defenses) and as a result has less harassment and skirmishing There are new units that require much more complex strategy and new super powerful units but as far as I can see a game rarely lasts long enough for either team to build these.

Warcraft 3 has more room for harassment, skirmishing,

spectaculous micro, using armies for gain outside of fighting your opponent, general fucking with people, insane comebacks and outright crazy luck. The difference is the heros and for me they are the difference between ‘just another rts’ and a game I want to play.

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REVIEW:FILM

Film reviews with Richard Shutter Island There are a lot of good things in Martin Scorsese’s latest, the psychological thriller “Shutter Island”. Robbie Robertson’s score, for one. Robertson seems to be channelling Bernard Herrmann, going wonderfully over the top from the very beginning. The music in the opening sequence seemingly nothing more than shots of Leonardo Di Caprio and Mark Ruffalo arriving and driving through the title location - screams with a vigour reminiscent of the climax of “Vertigo”.

The acting, as you might expect, is also first rate. Scorsese’s reputation as the best means he has his pick of performers. Di Caprio is now an established collaborator of the same order as Robert De Niro and his work in “Shutter Island”, as a 1950s US Marshall nominally investigating the disappearance of an inmate from a mental institution who comes to question his own sanity, is solid. He is well supported by the now typecast Ruffalo (playing yet another cop), Ben Kinglsey (in the sort of part Leo G Carroll used do in his sleep for Hitchcock: the institution’s benevolent chief psychiatrist), Max Von Sydow (a vaguely Nazi administrator), Michelle Williams (Di Caprio’s dead wife, who speaks to him in dreams), and so on.

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There are great moments. Di Caprio scaling a rock face and climbing lighthouse stairs is all very Hitchcockian. Unsettling scenes of butchered children staring plaintively from the afterlife are reminiscent of Kubrick’s “The Shining. A plague of rats brings to mind Herzog’s “Nosferatu”, if not Murnau’s. Holocaust flashbacks lean a bit on Spielberg’s “Schindler’s List”.

What’s missing is a script tight enough to tie all these disparate references together or an atmosphere sufficiently consistent to pull off the ludicrous plot devices. It is in fact a bad sign that the influences are as obvious as all this: as encyclopedic as Scorsese’s knowledge is of cinema he usually does not indulge in anything as obvious as a direct homage.

Without giving away “Shutter Island”’s central secret the recent film that it is most close to is “The Machinist”. While that neo noir classic similarly wore its influences on its sleeve it also managed to sustain a dark and subjective tone, effectively blurring the line between what is actually going on and what its troubled protagonist thinks is going on. Unfortunately you cannot say the same for “Shutter Island”, which is too long and ill focused to put across the same essential conceit.

Crazy Heart Jeff Bridges is the most underrated leading man of his generation.

From “The Last Picture Show”, “Fat City”, and “The Fabulous Baker Boys” to “The Fisher King”, “Fearless” and “The Big Lebowski” Bridges has consistently delivered as an actor for forty years. Now, finally, it looks as though he’s about to win an Oscar.

It would be easy to be cynical about the fact. “Crazy Heart”, the vehicle in question, could be seen as a mere means to an end.

Bridges is wonderful as Bad Blake an alcoholic, down-on-his-luck country legend travelling from small town to small town eking out a living on what remains of his reputation. Whether Bridges is significantly better in the role than any of the others listed above is a debatable point though. There’s an early scene in which Blake is sitting at a bar which is shot in a remarkably similar manner to much of “The Big Lebowski”. It started me wondering as to why there is so much award buzz over this film when Bridges was equally good 12 years ago in his defining performance.

Stripped of all the Oscar politics and the pressing need to recognise its lead actor for a life time’s work “Crazy Heart” is a damn fine tale of love, loss and redemption.

Bridges is not the whole film.

The support work of Maggie Gyllenhaal as the reporter one generation down who catches his eye is noteworthy in its own regard.

Gyllenhaal has the looks and the ability to play ‘girl next door’ parts without sliding into cliche or indulging in special pleading.

She’s always impressed as a credible human being on screen and finds a match in Bridges’ down-home charm.

Visually “Crazy Heart” is more assured than you might expect from first time director Scott Cooper. The Texas vistas provide an aesthetically arresting back drop, one that informs both the loneliness and the inspiration of Blake’s character. Cooper has a great eye for negative space, often framing Blake in the corner of an image. More intimate scenes, and those of musical performance, complement this style by favouring revelatory close-ups.

Obviously “Crazy Heart” will most appeal to country fans. The score by T-Bone Burnett and the late Stephen Bruton has been celebrated by those more in the know about the genre than I. It’s an affecting drama that transcends the slightly familiar feeling plot.

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REVIEW:FILM

Kevin Pryor Goes Down on Books Both Sides of the Moon by Alan Duff Alan Duff is a controversial figure.

Less so now that he has fled the country to escape his creditors.

But before that he was well known for riling liberal Pakeha and Maori alike with his uncompromising take on race relations and urban poverty. He also drew attention for

upbringing in Rotorua. The book was written in the period between his breakthrough novel ‘Once were Warriors’ and his latest moves to start writing European historical fiction.

If this book is a true account of Duff’s adolescence, no wonder

“If this book is a true account of Duff’s adolescence, no wonder he’s such a hard-arse” suing the cross-dressing director of his most famous work, and also for coming up to this very University and wanting to go mano to mano with the previous Vice Chancellor about the matter of a taxpayer funded swimming pool.

Both Sides of the Moon is a semiautobiographical account of Duff’s

he’s such a hard-arse. It reads pretty traumatically. From having to witness his mother jerking off strange men in his bedroom during parties, to enduring bullying, homelessness, and being molested in some Rotorua Public toilets, it does help to explain why Duff is so intolerant of political correctness.

And politically correct this book is not. The message is not surprisingly controversial. The protagonist, ‘Jimmy,’ is torn between the Pakeha lineage of his father, and the Maori lineage of his mother.

Though he doesn’t feel he belongs comfortably in either camp, he does come down pretty hard on the Maori side. Maori communal traditions are portrayed as constraints on human potential and inadequate for dealing with the complexity of the modern world. Jimmy blames this for a lot of the hurt he experiences growing up. He feels punished for having an enquiring mind, and for not following the communal consensus on ‘the way life is.’

There are also some evocative scenes of pre-European Maori life that balances Duff’s usual hard edged social realism with a certain (brutal) lyricism. This differentiates Both Sides of the Moon from his other books and makes it well worth tracking down.

Temeraire Naomi Novik Reviewed by Judders from the Block Temeraire is set during the Napoleonic war. However, instead of being some historical fiction thing it’s a fantasy, because there are dragons involved in the fighting instead of just people with ships and guns and cannons. As far as fantasy novels go it’s not too far out there, there are no goblins or fairies or giants and the world operates in a totally recognisable way except for the dragons which are enlisted as planes which can think, talk and have feelings but are really good for dropping bombs off and for spitting acid at people and enemy dragons.

In a skirmish, an English frigate captures a French ship, on which is a giant egg. In the giant egg there is a dragon which is going to hatch way too soon and will join to someone for life: that someone is Captain Will Laurence. He names the dragon from the egg Temeraire after it picks him as his buddy for life. And then it gets romantic between man and dragon - not in a kinky way, but in a “I’m sacrificing everything I have in this world... for you” kind of way.

Some of the things that happen in the story are interesting, but as a whole Temeraire lacks something.

The story takes a while to get anywhere really interesting, and reading how they found Temeraire (the dragon, not the novel) and just how awesome and special he is for the 15th time gets a little dull.

I don’t think the story in itself is bad; it just could have been done better. Lots of the long-windedness of Temeraire seems to come from trying to show the political and social situation of the time, but it doesn’t add a lot from doing so and perhaps it would have been more readable if this had been glossed over a little.

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RANDOM:NEXUS

WANT TO BE

THIS COOL? WRITE TO EMAIL: NEXUS@ WAIKATO.AC.NZ

ON HOW TO BE COOL ZARDOZ COOL.

Nexus is constantly on the look out for fresh meat.

Lurking in your lecture theatres, in the dark corners of your favourite pub, at your flat, in J basement and anywhere else students are sure to roam.

We are keen to hear what you have to say. Even if you haven’t written before, your stories and your opinions are of value to us.

We’re in need of newsos, musos, artoes, wordsmiths, organ donors, photographers, poets, assistants, media analysts, snitches, reviewers, designers and basically any student with a pulse and all it will cost you is some time.

Contributing for Nexus can help you build up a portfolio of work and is great real world experience for that big job interview at the end of your degree.

If there’s something that you think should be in Nexus but isn’t, come do it for us!

For more information check out nexusmag.co.nz or email our editor at nexus@waikato.ac.nz.

OPEN MIC NIGHTS

Starts March 11th Every Thursday from 5pm Drink and food specials at Momento Lakes

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Looking for performers Contact Us: info@ momentoespresso.co.nz or 021 891 810