Nexus Magazine No. 03 2014 by Nexus Magazine

N.03 / V.46

nexus magazine

CONTENTS EDITOR RACHAEL ELLIOTT

—

DESIGN HAYLIE GRAY

_03

Editorial

JAMES RAFFAN

_04

News

CONTRIBUTORS

_04

News from the University

_09

Sport

_10

Ridiculist & Vox Pops

_12

Reviews

_16

Honest Matt

_17

Horoscopes & Playlist

_18

Auteur

_19

Art and Stuff

_20

Overseas Experience

_21

Awesome Dead Person

_22

They call it Failure for a Reason

WWW.LISARYAN.CO.NZ

_24

What to do when Shit Goes South

_27

Study and the Single Mum

_28

The Godfather

_30

Columns

_37

Waikato Students' Union

_39

Advice

MANAGING EDITOR

SARA LEMME CHRISTOPHER YOUSEF KADER SPORTS GUY DR RICHARD SWAINSON HP GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY MIKE BILODEAU PATRICK RYAN MS. Y JULES CRAFT MATT HICKS BEATS BY J PETER DORNAUF LAURENCE MCLEAN PHOENIXKING TEE-SHIP LOUISE HUTT AUNTY SLUT MELODY WILKINSON MARK SAVAGE ZAC LYON AARON LETCHER TONY STEVENS RENEE BOYER-WILLISSON COVER ARTIST LISA RYAN

FUSION PRINT ADVERTISING ADS@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ OFFICES GROUND FLOOR, STUDENT UNION BUILDING GATE ONE, UNIVERSITY OF WAIKATO KNIGHTON ROAD, HAMILTON ONLINE NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ

_40 Notices

FACEBOOK.COM/NEXUSNZ @NEXUSMAG

nexusmag.co.nz

_42 Puzzles

PHOTOGRAPH: LOUISE HUTT

nexus magazine

EDITORIAL RACHAEL ELLIOTT

—

ome days you just hate everything. You hate the girl in the shiny

what it says, so I ripped it in half. It says that without winning lotto or inher-

car who looked at you on your way to Uni, you hate the ducks

iting heaps of money from a long lost relative, I will never own my own

for shitting on the footpath, you hate the guy who isn’t wearing

home. It says that I’ll still be paying my loan back when I’m ready to retire.

enough deodorant, you hate the guy who is wearing too much deodorant,

But without Studylink, I wouldn’t be here. And while the plan for my

you hate the curb for getting in the way of your toe and you definitely hate

future I made when I was 14 hasn’t come to fruition, I’m convinced that

anyone who tells you to cheer up.

I’m right where I’m supposed to be, even if where I’m supposed to be

I’ve realised I have these days whenever I have to deal with Studylink. It doesn’t matter what you’re studying here at uni there is one universal truth that every student eventually learns: Studylink sucks. If you haven’t learnt this yet, congratulations. Or rather, just you wait… I learned the ‘Studylink hates you and wants you to suffer’ lesson the

is broke, in debt and stressed out. The fact that I can be happy under such circumstances proves that I’m an optimist. Or I need psychiatric help. Possibly both. I love learning and the reality is that without Studylink, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to come to University at all, let alone stick with it

hard way in my first year. I thought that I could work through my study

until Masters Level. And no matter how many times people tell me my

breaks and maybe, I don’t know, afford to buy myself a scarf so I didn’t

‘academic-ness’ is annoying (that’s not even a word Mum!), that I’m wast-

die from pneumonia breathing the fog every morning as I walked to and

ing time at Uni and should get a real job (those don’t exist Dad, I’ve looked!)

from Col Hall. Or buy myself a coffee or a chocolate bar or something. (I

I’m not listening. I’m busy, soaking up as much knowledge as I can to

had big dreams in first year.) I didn’t find out the truth until I was stung in my final week with a $2000

be a better, more educated, more constructive member of society. With any luck.

debt. I’m still paying that debt and I’m still not entirely sure where that

Studylink, I hate you. But I can’t live without you. Thus my life becomes

figure came from. Studylink told me I owed it, the IRD pursued it and so I

a bad soap Opera- except Studylink never says sorry for being an asshole,

pay it. Begrudgingly. With much muttering.

or buys me flowers. I’m going to put that in the suggestion box next time I

My student loan statement came in the mail yesterday. I already know

go see them. If I can figure out where their office is. If they even have one.

nexus magazine

LETTUCE TO THE EDITOR

Since when are we a match making service?

music is playing softly in the background. after dinner we watch tv and i need to take a dump. while taking a dump i thought i might rub one out. load up youporn on my phone and give the old weiner the good old massage. finish up and go back to watching tv.the whole family is horrified. my granny wont even look at me.

YOU KNOW YOU WANT YOU IT

THE GOD DAMN BLUETOOTH WAS STILL ON AND THE PORN NOISE WAS BEING BROADCAST IN THE LIVING ROOM. i left home straight after and havent talked to the family

Dear Hot Blonde, I really enjoyed the way your body grinded against mine on the dance floor last night. I can’t stop thinking about you. I kept the number you wrote me but I think it might be

since. mum has left 10 messages telling me to call.the worst part is it was an interracial gang bang video. im considering leaving this country.

wrong because I cannot get a hold of you. I really need your number because I want to send you a pink sexy times rose on wednesday for the Drama Society’s Love Week. I wanna see you again, this time maybe somewhere more private. *wink*

Blind Date Ruffles Feathers

Christopher Kader in disguise ANONYMOUS

Hi, I reckon you should try to get Christopher Yousef Kader to

THE GENIUS, POOR, STUDENT PHILANTHROPIST

write a column about relevant political or economic issues. He wrote the lettuce to the editor about the TPP. I’m not him, just an idea I had whilst reading nexus. A lot of stuff about drinking and sex (which is all good) but how about

Dear Nexus, Upon reading the Bank Blind Date Gentleman’s

some balance?

Experience, I found myself horribly appalled and disgusted that a primeval creature such as this one belongs to the same gender as myself. He displays a crass disregard for women, treating sexism as “healthy”. Furthermore the

Good Question

“gentleman” uses such words as “horn-dog” to describe

THE DORK KNIGHT

someone who simply enjoys the sexual experience, a very human feeling and considers a clever articulate woman, who he obviously does not understand, to be “a stage 10 clinger.”

DISCLAIMER: Letters published contain the opinion of the writer and the writer alone. Nexus publications take no responsibility for the content or opinions so expressed. By submitting your letter you give consent to its publication

With all of the discussion about global conflicts, femi-

As a man, also a carnivore from the country side, I con-

nism and sexism in the university, we have lost sight of an

sider this boy to be foolish, immature and in a serious need

important issue. When is President Letch Luthor going to

of growing up. W.C. you live up to your name very well, and

don his power suit and in his bald-headed glory do battle

are in fact why feminism is still a needed thing in society.

with Superman on the village green?

Maybe you should…

Dear Nexus,

authors own work and Nexus will not edit to compensate

Would it be possible to assemble a spotify playlist of the I bought a UE BOOM. Its a bluetooth speaker.

right to edit or refuse to publish any letter which breaches

Family was all at home for dinner and i was showing off

any law, is defamatory to any person, or contains threats

the speaker. the family was quite impressed at the speaker.

of violence or hate speech.

the night goes on and we have dinner all the while the

nexusmag.co.nz

LIAM

ANONYMOUS

in Nexus and subsequent public scrutiny. Letters are the for lack of intelligence or coherency. Nexus reserves the

Give me tunes!

flatting tunes that we can go to to listen to them. Thanks

nexus magazine

WELCOME TO THE FUTURE

NEWS

GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY

— You know you’re living in the future when there are bionic hands that can feel. That’s exactly what a team of researchers tested recently on Danish amputee Dennis Aabo Sørensen. Sensors in the bionic hand’s fingers were connected to electrodes implanted into his arm. Sørensen was impressed, “The

BLOW TO MAORI AND PUBLIC GOOD RESEARCH AS GOVERNMENT SUCKS BALLS

feeling is very close to the sensation you get when you touch things with your normal hand.” All that remains is to perfect the technology and make it small enough for someone to use in their daily life. In other news… monkey mind control! Scientists at Harvard Medical School implanted 36 electrodes into the spinal cord of a monkey, which were hooked up to the brain of a second monkey. The first monkey was then sedated, and the other was

GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY

able to control its movements like some messed up monkey

—

avatar. Apart from being extremely cool, this could give great hope to paraplegics, as the damaged nerves could simply be

The Maori Party have released a statement expressing shock

bypassed and full movement restored.

and disappointment at the Government decision to discontinue

So welcome to the future! Where it doesn’t matter too much

funding to Nga Pae o te Maramatanga, the only Maori centre

if you break your back or lose a limb, so why not be as reckless

of research excellence. Nga Pae o te Maramatanga conducts

as possible?

and supports research relevant to Maori communities. The Maori Party believes the decision to stop funding after 2015 marginalises Maori, and is part of a wider trend to undermine the Maori research sector. Party leader Pita Sharples highlighted the sector’s importance, stating: “Research was used as a tool to colonise our people, and the Maori research agenda is all about reclaiming our lost knowledge, our hidden potential, and making research relevant to the development of our communities.” Meanwhile the hemlock was flowing in other areas, with Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce increasing the proportion of public funding going to academic research that already has private funding. “This places a higher value on research

INTERNATIONAL CRIMINAL COURT CONVICTS WARLORD CHRISTOPHER YOUSEF KADER

—

that meets user needs”, he said. Tertiary Education Union vice-president Sarah Grey objected to this move, claiming uni-

In its second ever conviction in its 11 year history, the International Criminal

versities ought to research all issues. “There is some research

Court has found Congolese warlord Germaine Katanga guilty of war crimes.

that businesses may never want to take place but is still crucial

Katanga, also known as Simba, committed the crimes while he was a leader of

to the wellbeing of our communities. There is also blue skies

the Patriotic Resistance Force in Ituri (FRPI) during the Ituri conflict.

research that may have no immediate economic benefit but is crucial to our understanding of the world.” Both these moves, combined with National’s previous cuts to the Arts and Social Sciences, will be worrying to many, and may be making Socrates feel a bit queasy.

In addition to four war crimes, Katanga was also convicted of accessory to a crime against humanity (murder). He was acquitted of another crime against humanity charge as well as three other war crimes (using child soldiers, rape and sexual slavery). It is alleged that Katanga, while serving as senior commander of the FRPI, led a killing spree through the village of Bogoro in 2003, killing at least 200 civilians. The warrant for his arrest from the ICC stated there were reasonable grounds to

“THERE IS SOME RESEARCH THAT BUSINESS MAY NEVER WANT TO TAKE PLACE BUT IS STILL CRUCIAL TO THE WELLBEING OF OUR COMMUNITIES.” SARAH GREY

believe that he also arrested and imprisoned surviving civilians in a room filled with corpses, and sexually enslaved several women and girls. Katanga ended his stint in the FRPI when he was recruited as a general within the DRC's national army as part of a pacification policy in December 2004. He was arrested by the same government in March 2005 and surrendered to The Hague in October 2007. The ICC's first successful conviction in 2012 was Thomas Lubanga Dyilo, who fought against Katanga with a rival militia in the Ituri conflict.

nexus magazine

that it "overrides individual consent." Hamilton City Council which has prudently been waiting for the decision will now hold a vote on whether to bring back fluoridation. Mayor Hardaker said that they will again "be reviewing all the information to enable us to decide what the next steps for Hamilton will be".

FLUORIDE FIGHT CONTINUES CHRISTOPHER YOUSEF KADER

— High Court Judge Justice Rodney Hansen has ruled that local councils have the right to fluoridate drinking water. The decision follows Christchurch-based fluorosis-botherers New Health New Zealand's dispute with the South Taranaki District Council over their decision to fluoridate Patea and Waverley's drinking water in May of 2013. New Health New Zealand Inc. had applied to review the council's decision, claiming it was in breach of the right to refuse medical treatment in the Bill of Rights Act. The High Court has rejected the application on all grounds. In his judgement report Justice Hansen concluded “that there is implied power to fluoridate in the Local Government Act 2002 . . . the Health Act confirms that fluoride may be added to drinking water in accordance with drinking water standards issued under that Act." Justice Hansen analogised fluoridation to other public health interventions saying "The addition of iodine to salt, folic acid to bread and the pasteurisation of milk are, in my view, equivalent intervention made to achieve public health benefits by means which could not be achieved nearly as effectively by medicating

SCUM THE NEW RENEWABLE ENERGY? IRIS RIDDELL

—

the populace individually." The chairman of New Health New Zealand Inc, David Sloan,

Things are heating up at Lake Rotomahana near Rotorua - seriously, the geother-

has stated they will appeal the decision. He disagrees that

mal heat it produces could potentially power millions of light bulbs according

fluoridation does not meet the definition of medication. Saying

to scientists.

"delivering medication this way is contrary to medical ethics as

The project, led by GNS Science in collaboration with the University of Waikato,

it fails to control for dose, individual need and sensitivities" and

the United States' Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, seeks to measure the heat output of the 800-hectare lake. Preliminary results show the amount of heat passing through the lake floor is “heaps and heaps” - to use the technical term - about five times higher than similar measurements at hot vents on the sea floor of the Pacific Ocean. “There's

“THE ADDITION OF IODINE TO SALT, FOLIC ACID TO BREAD AND THE PASTEURISATION OF MILK ARE, IN MY VIEW, EQUIVALENT INTERVENTION MADE TO ACHIEVE PUBLIC HEALTH BENEFITS BY MEANS WHICH COULD NOT BE ACHIEVED NEARLY AS EFFECTIVELY BY MEDICATING THE POPULACE INDIVIDUALLY” - JUSTICE HANSEN

about two square kilometres of the lake floor where there is enough heat energy to power a 60 watt light bulb every square metre,” said project leader Cornel de Ronde from GNS Science. The shiny, state-of-the-art instruments used to measure the heat, which have not been used in New Zealand before, will be placed at 110 grid points on the lake floor for up to 24 hours before moving to a new spot. The lake is roughly 3km by 6km and is about 120m deep at its deepest point. Results from the latest expedition will help scientists understand the size and the state of the magma body that lies under the region.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

NAKI SAND-4-$$$ SCHEME

SUPPORT YOUR COUNTRY’S CRICKET TEAM OR FACE EXPULSION FROM UNIVERSITY!

CHRISTOPHER YOUSEF KADER

GABRIEL BANKIER-PERRY

—

An Environmental Protection Authority consent hearing into

Dozens of students in the Indian state of Kashmir have been kicked out of their university after cheering for

ironsand exploitation on the South Taranaki coast began in

rival cricket team Pakistan. If this isn’t shocking enough, they were also being threatened with sedition charges.

Wellington on the 10th of this month and is expected to end

Sedition is the crime of inciting rebellion against the government and can carry a life sentence. Business admin-

early in May. It is the first of its kind to be undertaken by the

istration student Muteebul Majid claimed their expulsion was a case of discrimination. ‘Are they slapping these

EPA under the current Exclusive Economic Zone legislation.

charges against us for being Kashmiris or for cheering for the Pakistani team?’ he asked. Tensions between India

The hearing will also be taken on the road, visiting Hamilton

and Pakistan go back decades to the founding of the countries, when British India was split into predominantly

April 7-11 and Ngati Ruanui marae in South Taranaki later that

Hindu and Muslim areas. The state of Kashmir, with its mixed Hindu and Muslim population, is claimed by both

same month.

countries and has been the cause of at least three wars. Meanwhile, Pakistan has welcomed the students should

The company making the application is TransTasman

they wish to continue their studies across the border. Pakistan won the one-day match against India, which is

Resources, which seeks to extract up to 50 million tonnes of

probably why the Indians are so damn angsty.

sand’n’stuff per year and process it on an in situ factory vessel.

“THE COMPANY... SEEKS TO EXTRACT UP TO 50 MILLION TONNES OF SAND’N’STUFF PER YEAR...”

SCIENCE BITCHES! IRIS RIDDELL

The piece of seafloor TTR wants to eat lies in an area known as the South Taranaki Bight. The EPA received 4848 submissions and of the eight that were in favour of the project, at least half of those were from the mineral industry. Most of the submissions against the mining were facilitated through a form distributed by KASM, Kiwis Against Seabed Mining. A submission was also made by the Taranaki Regional Council. They did not oppose the application but requested more information about the potential risks of seabed mining and expressed doubts about TTRs ability to create enough jobs to make up for potential environmental mishaps. A major concern with ironsand exploitation expressed by opponents of mining is the sediment plume caused by dredging the sand. If the plume turns out to be significant it could impact ecology by blocking light needed by phytoplankton which are vital to the marine food chain. On the first day of the hearing, the EPA committee tasked with deciding on the application heard from a miner that the sand would be worth $150 million a year to the Taranaki economy.

— The University of Waikato School of Science has a new head on its shoulders. Newly appointed Head, Professor Chad Hewitt, is looking forward to the challenge of bringing together the existing three science departments under one umbrella. “Throughout my career I’ve managed change, and that is what this new role is about, creating a new School of Science that will unify Earth and Ocean Sciences, Biological Sciences and Chemistry to enhance their strengths.” Born, bred and educated in the US, Professor Hewitt and his family have returned to New Zealand after nine years in Australia where he worked in various roles, including Pro ViceChancellor (Research) for CQUniversity in Queensland, and as Professor and Director of the National Centre for Marine Conservation and Resource Sustainability at the University of Tasmania. His own research is in the area of marine bio invasions and biosecurity arrangements – or “studying nasty pests that come in on ships, with aquaculture and in aquaria”.

nexus magazine

NEWS FROM THE UNIVERSITY

GIVE BLOOD ON CAMPUS — NZ Blood’s Mobile Blood Collection Unit will be at the Rec Centre from Monday 17 to Wednesday 19 March, 10am-2.30pm. Drop-ins are welcome, but it’s best to make an appointment beforehand – you can do this by calling 0800 448 325 or visiting www.nzblood.co.nz and clicking ‘Book Appointment Now’. Don’t forget to bring your ID.

BALLOONS OVER WAIKATO COMPETITION — The University is proud to be a strategic partner of the Balloons over Waikato festival, 26-30 March. To celebrate, we’re giving one lucky person a balloon ride. Details at our Facebook page, www.facebook.com/waikatouniversity. Don’t forget, the annual Night Glow is happening on the campus sports fields on Saturday 29 March from 4-9pm. The family-friendly event includes live music and entertainment, food, stalls and rides. Entry is free. balloonsoverwaikato.co.nz

COUNSELLING AVAILABLE — The University’s counselling team has added a new service that will enable students to directly email a counsellor and receive an initial consultation and response within 24 hours (Monday to Friday). If you have any concerns or issues you would like to discuss with a counsellor, and to set up a face-to-face consultation, please email counselling@waikato.ac.nz. All correspondence is totally confidential.

CAREERS FESTIVAL STUDENT EXCHANGE FAIR

— The Careers Festival is happening on Wednesday 26 March, 10am-2pm, on

—

the Village Green and is a fantastic opportunity for students to establish

Want to experience student life overseas while studying for your Waikato degree? Come along

relationships with employers and

to find out how to add a truly global dimension to your university life, what it all costs, how to

seek valuable career advice.

apply and which countries are available to visit. Wednesday 26 March, 11am-2pm, Level 2 Foyer of the Student Centre.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

TIPS FOR THE SPORTS GAMBLER SPORTS GUY

— So last week a friend of mine asked for a tip on what would be a good bet to make at the TAB. I gave him one; he made it and became slightly richer. Then an idea for my page came to me and, well, here we are. Aside from telling you all to put money against the Philadelphia 76ers in every game they play, this will be a weekly thing where I highlight a bet or two that I would class as one worth making for those of you who like to dabble. This week we look to the English Premier League. In round 31 (kicking off on March 22) we will see a number of teams play twice. When this occurs in a round, we often see players rested in some teams so they are at less risk of injury/ fatigue. With this in mind, it might pay to monitor the odds given to league heavyweights Liverpool. The Merseysiders play two easily winnable games (Cardiff – away and Sunderland – home) so should still be tipped as the favourite in each fixture. However, the probability of rested players matched with the extra travel for the team is likely to produce slightly higher odds. If Liverpool are

RICHIE MCCAW EXPIRED? SPORTS GUY - OPINION

—

paying more than $2.10 in either fixture head-tohead, I’d jump on that.

I know to all you Union crazy kids out there

Blacks #7 jersey. What I think he needs to do is

My second tip for this round is in the fixture

what I’m about to say could be blasphemous,

step down and let the young bloods like Sam

between league front-runners Chelsea and

but recent times have left me pondering this

Cane take the wheel because, quite frankly, if we

Arsenal. Arsenal lead the pack for the early stages

question – has Richie McCaw passed his used-

don’t bring the young bloods through now, we

of the season, however injuries to key players

by date?

won’t win the 2015 World Cup. It’s that simple.

and their usual choking have cost them points in

After injuries and a sabbatical over the last

This isn’t just a huge, wild call as you may

recent weeks and have seen them drop to third,

couple of years, it seems McCaw has lost a bit

think. It’s based on the fact that other big Rugby

with Chelsea racing out to a commanding 7 point

of grunt. Just look at the game against the Blues

sides in the world (e.g. Australia, England, France

lead. With Chelsea at home, expect them to be

a couple of weekends ago. Yes, he went off with

etc) are filtering in young players while keeping

favourites. But given the talent of their opponent,

a broken digit, but even before that he was slip-

their experienced players in the mix to support

you should see them at good odds (my estima-

ping off tackles and doing very little when in the

the new guys. This gives them time to grow and

tion is around $2.35-$2.50). A draw in this fixture

mix of things. And we all know that if he says

adjust to the extra intensity of the international

is also worth looking at if you’re willing to take

he is available for an All Blacks test match, he’ll

stage, adding some strength, pace and wide-

the risk for the extra money, but with the home

be starting at 7 and captaining the side, which

eyedness to the team which, at this stage, it

advantage I think Chelsea will be too strong for

at this stage is looking like a certainty for the

looks like the All Blacks are not going to have.

Arsenal and take the W.

2015 World Cup.

So go forth and use these tips, or don’t. Entirely up to you.

Here’s my opinion on the matter. Richie

Keep Richie in the team, but have him adding impact off the bench and give the number 7 jer-

McCaw needs to relinquish the captaincy and

sey to Sam Cane, a player who flourished during

become more of a role player. Because he’s

McCaw’s sabbatical. The same could be said for

*NOTE: Nexus Magazine does not condone gam-

become somewhat of a sporting hero in New

Dan Carter, but let’s face it – he’s injury prone as

bling. If you choose to follow these tips please do

Zealand, there would be a wild public outcry if

and will spend more time out with injuries than

so responsibly and don’t come crying to us if there

he was not selected when declared healthy, so

he will spend time on the field.

is an upset. It’s called gambling for a reason – this

there is no chance of him being dropped. Just

is just an educated tips section. Anything can

look at his sabbatical. Once he decided he was

happen in the world of sports.*

ready to come back he was straight into the All

No doubt I’ve fired a few of you up. Just give it some thought; you might see it my way.

nexus magazine

RIDICULIST

VOX POPS

Studylink’s a bit special edition.

Vox populi is a Latin phrase that literally means voice of the people.

1 Studylink. Makes you have sixteen different passwords to access

Sika CUP course Tell me your Studylink story? I didn’t have it too bad because I did everything early. What would you say to an ex? Happy days, I guess.

your online account.

2 Studylink. You can’t remember number 4, so you ring Studylink, prepared to endure their shitty, shitty hold music.

Dan CUP course. Tell me your Studylink story? It’s a long process man, it dragged on. But once you get it sorted it’s a load off your mind. It took ages because I was being slack I reckon. What would you say to an ex? You’re an ex for a reason.

Studylink. Keeps you on hold for 4 hours listening to Brooke Fraser’s only hit, reminding you every 3minutes that it’s faster if you do it online.

Sean Secondary Teaching. Tell me your Studylink story? They haven’t messed me around yet. What would you say to an ex? I’d probably ignore them if I saw them.

Studylink. Tell you they’ve received your application and that everything’s fine, you don’t need to do anything else. JK, they didn’t process it!

Michael Psychology and Anthropology. Tell me your Studylink story? I filled in my application in November, sent it

5 Studylink. Employs temps who don’t know how the computer

in and got the email saying everything was sweet and I didn’t have to do anything else. A week before uni started I found out that they hadn’t done anything and apparently it hadn’t gone through. What would you say to an ex? I don’t have an ex- there’s only one woman for me.

works and don’t understand any of the systems. Wonders why their call centre is such a clusterfuck.

6 Studylink.

Maxi Tell me your Studylink story? I’m from overseas, so I don’t have one. What would you say to an ex? I’m still in touch with them all, so I can say whatever I like

Calls you to check something. Asks you for your name and date of birth to verify who you are. Wait, didn’t they call you?

7 Studylink. Cuts off your payments because they thought you were done studying. In April.

Angela Primary Teaching Tell me your Studylink story? God they’re annoying! They keep you on hold for ages and play Brooke Fraser over and over. But apparently they’ve added Lorde now, so that’s cool. What would you say to an ex? Hey, howsit. I’m a nice person.

8 Studylink. I hate you. I can’t get a job because I’m at uni all the time. I can’t get living costs because I’m not a ‘full time student’. I can’t get a student allowance because I’m a post graduate student. I can’t get any hardship grants because you say I’m not in hardship. I can’t go on the dole because I’m a student.

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REVIEWERS NEEDED. IF YOU WOULD LIKE YO WRITE A CASUAL BOOK, GAME OR GIG REVIEW EMAIL EDITOR@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ.

nexus magazine

ADVOCACY WEEK MONDAY 24TH - FRIDAY 28TH MARCH

nexus magazine

Dallas Buyers Club

All is Lost

FILM REVIEW BY DR RICHARD SWAINSON

If the surest way to win an Academy Award is to play a Holocaust victim,

Even more so than Gravity, All is Lost is an exercise in pure cinema. The

having AIDs on screen must come a close second. In Dallas Buyers Club

simplest of stories is told through a combination of sound and images.

lead Matthew McConaughey and supporting player Jared Leto act with

There's only one character, a sailor in mid-ocean whose vessel is struck

a capital 'A', pulling out all the stops as, respectively, Ron Woodroof, a

and damaged by a shipping container. Played by the iconic Robert Redford,

rodeo-loving white trash electrician with the disease and his transgen-

he's far from young. Age, however, equates not only with wisdom but a

der business associate. Unsurprisingly, the pair were both duly rewarded

certain evenness of temperament. No matter what fate or circumstance

with golden statues, as much for losing a lot of weight and staying out

throw at "our man" he quietly seeks to overcome, keeping despair at bay

of the sun as for their larger-than-life emoting. The Academy is never one

until the very last. Aside from a singular, choice expletive the only words

for subtlety. The film itself is visually arresting and well directed by French Canadian Jean-Marc Vallee. A character study whose raison d'etre is performance,

I suspect there will be those who will find the film too minimalist by

existing as it were to be the icing on the cake of McConaughey's career

half. Any looking for a back story or explanation of who this character is

renaissance, it pushes some obvious, little-guy-sticking-it-to-the-man but-

and what motivates him will be disappointed. Unlike Gravity there are no

tons. The true-ish tale involves Woodroof's entrepreneurial response to his

melodramatic moments in which absent loved ones are cried for. All is Lost

condition. That the film's creators had to exaggerate the man's homopho-

is closer in ambition and tone to the Ernest Hemingway novella The Old

bia to beef up the tension in the early scenes and contrive all the fictional

Man and the Sea, though it is far superior to any movie adaptation of that

characters around him, writing his real-life sister and daughter out of the

book and much more spartan in its characterisation.

story completely, is standard Hollywood practice. So far as medical melodramas with a vague, liberal agenda go, Dallas

The film is an existential drama in which man is pitted against the elements in a very basic and fundamental way. Part of its strength is that any

Buyers Club is competent enough. Some may be moved, as I was fleet-

wider thematic significance that might be found in the bare bones narrative

ingly. Others might recall that wicked parody of the musical Rent in Team

is left up to the audience.

America: World Police where marionettes on stage sing the fun-loving chorus: "AIDs, Everyone's Got AIDs! AIDS! AIDS! AIDs!"

we hear come at the outset, by way of the sailor's terse and ambiguous farewell statement.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

Cash

Toulouse

ALBUM REVIEW BY HP

ALBUM REVIEW BY JAMES RAFFAN

Merc Swazey aka Hash has been building up in Aus winning rap battles

Benny Tipene’s new album Toulouse dropped last week and it sucks, but it

with hilarious lines and super Kiwi swagger. He has then paired up with

really isn’t really his fault. The sad reality is that Tipene has fallen victim to

burgeoning beat basher, Nettsmoney to create an eight track E.P. that you

an all too familiar tale of record companies and execs trying to pigeonhole

can download for free/koha through bandcamp.com.

an artist into an area that they think will sell. The result is that Toulouse is

And the humour is still there. Well I hope it is. Although the punchlines are few and far between with Swazey conjuring up a persona hell-bent on

a schizophrenic EP that leaves you with no real sense of who the artist is or more importantly who he wants to be.

stupid rap clichés. He drops his own name like he has nothing to say and

The lead off track Make You Mine is basically positioning Tipene as New

then later comments that he has nothing to say. When the chorus of the

Zealand’s Phillip Phillips in an effort to ride on the coat tails of resurgent

second track is effectively, “I like my shit real ign’rant,” there is a real fear

folk pop. Lonely is the lyrically simplistic ballad that follows it and so it goes

his Lonely Island attempt at a Dirty South style is going to sink. Timmy

on, each track bears no commonality with the last. The only redeeming

Two Times and Most Breezy are a better balance of sheer stupidity and

track might be the titular one Toulouse which is cleaver and complex. There

Swazey’s ability to throw out some good lines and prove his flow; but the

seems to be a bit of soul to that one.

E.P. focuses far more on taking the piss than pushing the envelope. Nettsmoney is on point throughout making garish and clunky/crunky

A few weeks ago I reviewed The Broods EP and I think it may tarnish my opinion of other music that is coming out because that was so layered,

beats. He shows his diversity by being over the top while accompanying

soulful and satisfying. It's an unfair comparison to make because the

sparse lyrics, dropping stretched-out screwed beats when required and

Broods EP will last in my Spotify collection for many years to come where

then flying into top gear effortlessly. They back Swazey and his Purple

I barely made it through Tipene’s album.

Drank influenced atmosphere in perfect partnership adding the appropri-

The real shame of all of this is that Tolouse will sell a fuck ton of cop-

ate accessories. However, the jokes don’t hold and Swazey’s irony and

ies. Tipene is a charismatic performer who will probably make many more

Nettsmoney’s skill are simply not enough especially when Youtube will

albums each one better than this debut effort.

show you just how good Swazey can be.

nexus magazine

Barracuda

Soundshapes

BOOK REVIEW BY RENEE BOYER-WILLISSON

GAME REVIEW BY PHOENIXKING

Barracuda by Christos Tsolkias is the story of Australian Danny Kelly, a

Rhythm clashes with shape and colour to present you with the indie game

boy who can swim. Talent-spotted at a club swim-meet, he is catapulted

Soundshapes. This game allows players to have free creative reign on using

out of his working class existence into the world of an exclusive private

a blend of shapes and sound to create catchy music tracks that can be

boys’ school. But the book opens years later in Glasgow, with a Dan who

played by anyone.

does not swim, and tells people he can’t. The chapters alternate from 1994 moving forward, and a couple of decades later, moving back.

There is a story mode that tries to provide different ideas and ways of blending music, which upon completing a level rewards you with new

My favourite moment in the book, which is a defining moment for Danny,

beats and shapes. Each of the levels are unique and provide a challenge

is when, after years of completely avoiding computers, he finally types

in that you must complete the level while avoiding red objects. The com-

his name into Google. Rather than his perceived failure and shame being

munity section is where the party's at, people from all over the world are

revealed in the results in front of him, it is worse – there is nothing about

creating their own unique levels that can be challenging, simple, upbeat,

him at all. “At that moment he realised that it hadn’t all been about being

downbeat or every beat imaginable.

better and faster and stronger; that hadn’t been all he wanted. It had also

You can get this game on nearly every Playstation console (sorry PS1 I

been to make a mark… to be a name. There was no mark and there never

still love you). Once brought on the store you can download this game on

would be. No one knew his name.” For me, the ‘cleverness’ that permeates this book is its ultimate down-

any console, including your PS4 that you used your course related costs to get. It even includes music, provided by real life artists as well: Deadmau5

fall. The tension builds well as the storylines move together in time, but I

the most famous of the bunch. Each of the console version packs has its

found the climax anti-climactic, and not entirely believable. booksellersnz.

own unique way of playing the game, ( i.e. the psvita lets you use the touch

wordpress.com booksellersnz.wordpress.com

to manipulate objects when creating the game). The PS4 uses the inbuilt speaker on the dualshock 4 controller to enhance your experience of this game. If you want a mood adapting game, I would recommend picking up this relatively low priced, creative, and most importantly fun to play game.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

HØNEST MATT MEETS GUY PIGDEN AND HARLEY NEVILLE (CREATORS PIGVILLE AND THE FILM ‘OLDER’) Honest Matt Matt Hicks

So give us a brief synopsis of ‘Older’. What’s it about and how far

assume that it isn’t. I saw a lot of problems on the Zombie film looming on

comedy about sex, love, relationships, growing up and how our nostalgic

the horizon and chose to believe other peoples assurances that they would

attachment to the past can colour our perception of the present sometimes

fix them. Inevitably nobody did and these issues blew up in our face. So

for the worse. (Well that’s what our blurb on the website says). Did you

go with your instincts, trust your gut. You have a great sense of your film

guys study film or did you just pick up a camera and start creating?

and you’ll know when things are heading in the wrong direction (most of

Harley: We just picked up a camera and started creating, after having a lot

the time!). What’s the plan once ‘Older’ is finished? Are you planning

of fun on our first film we made another and then another and with each

to sell online or on DVD or maybe put it out online for free? Guy: We’ll

film we learned a lesson. Guy: I worked as a runner for a production com-

submit it to festivals first and foremost to try and get interest from distribu-

pany in London and did script reading work for their head of development.

tors and gain a profile. Then we’ll look at DVD and online release based on

Which is really how I began to develop my writing and understanding of

the reaction we receive. I think potentially the film will have a very limited

the film industry. However I was either too young or too poor or too under

cinema run but mainly it’ll be online and DVD that is where most people

qualified to go to film school when it interested me and later I realized that

will see it. We’d rather not put it out for free. Pigville is known for their

Harley and I where really embarking on our own self-made film school with

funny often-crude YouTube videos. This new movie ‘Older’ seems to be

the projects we did together. Having one feature film under your belt

more a bit more serious than what were used to from Pigville. Do you

must have made this one a bit easier? What did you learn making ‘I

ever fear people may not buy into you guys acting in serious roles?

survived a zombie holocaust’ that you have applied to ‘Older’? Guy: I

Harley: Crude!? Interview over.

learned a lot! I think a couple things stand out. One if you foresee a prob-

More at sounzgood.co.nz.

lem, fix it, don’t listen to people telling you it’s not your responsibility or that

it’s being taken care of. Until you see evidence of the problem being solved

through production are you? Guy: Older is an honest confronting drama/

nexusmag.co.nz

This is your week. Embrace everything that life throws at you. Except junkies and streakers. You should never embrace junkies. Take chances, life is too short and do you really want to look back and say “I never did a funnel.” Didn’t think so.

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

Yugoslavia is on the brink of armed combat with Russia, Syria is a clusterfuck and North Korea is…well… North Korea. If that wasn’t bad enough you have an 8am tutorial every week. The world can go fuck itself.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

Jupiter and Mars are in perfect alignment this week. We are not sure if that means you should drink more or drink less. But we are pretty sure that you shouldn’t accept free PVA glue out of a huff bag from strangers. Not because the stars told us- it just seems smart.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

The time for great contemplation has arrived. You’re beginning your third week of the rest of your life and you are not sure if you have made the right decision. Here is a pro tip: If you’re contemplating your career choice while filling your car up then Law school was the right decision. If you’re wondering if Philosophy was the right choice then ask yourself is the bong blue or does it just appear blue in my head?

Aries (March 21 - April 19)

HOROSCOPES

Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)

This is a week to rely on stealth. The ability to travel incognito becomes more vital than ever before. Mainly because your flatmate has started to notice the hair missing from his hairbrush and his toothbrush being a little clean. He thinks you’re a little creepy but he doesn’t suspect project Clone X so keep quiet.

Dan, this is Sarah. First of all I said Scorpio not Virgo. I also said I had a friend who lived in College Hall. I live in Snead. Thirdly I gave you a fake number anyway so stop taking up people’s horoscopes trying to find me and stop calling College Hall, they are talking restraining orders.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)

Now is the time to seize the moment. Cape Diem. Start by putting your name down for The Bank Blind Date. At best you go out for an enjoyable evening and meet the person of your dreams over some free food. At worst you meet a chauvinistic pig who isn’t worth talking to. Either way you’ll get laid so it can’t be that bad, right?

Libra (September 23 - October 22)

Stay away from people with six letter first names. They will do you great harm this week. The scars are both physical and emotional. Or was that guys with seven letter first names? Who can remember these things? Just to be safe stay away from people with names this week.

Pisces (February 19 - March 20)

Sometimes we make the right choices, sometimes we make the wrong choices but one thing is for sure. You should never take ecstasy. That messes you up. A Neapolitan ice-cream man told me that before he killed George Washington.

Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)

The realities of both monogamy and interdependency are creeping steadily into your consciousness. Is love really enough to sustain you in an entirely loveless world or is it just affection that you have turned into meaningless sexual contact and most importantly, what the fuck is up with that movie where Joaquin Phoenix falls in love with a computer? That shit is weird man.

Sagittarians should prepare for war this week. The walls are closing in and you will be left with very little option but to strike back. Those Girl Guide biscuit sales people have gotten pushier every year and it’s about time someone stood up to their tyranny. The fields of campus will be littered with blood and biscuits tonight friends.

This week the world is against you. Life sucks. There is no way around that and the stupid jokes in this horoscope aren’t helping. If you just want to vent and rage at someone about how shit they are, can we suggest editor@salient.org.nz

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

Leo (July 23 - August 22)

nexus magazine

Spotlight on Diplo/Mad Decent BEATS BY J

Lil Wayne / Nicki Minaj / Corey Gunz

Lay it Down

Feat. Faustix & Imanos & Kai / Diplo

Revolution

Diplo / Express Yourself Remix

Set it Off - The FatRat Remix

Usher / Looking 4 Myself

Climax

Santigold / Master of My Make-Believe

Look at these Hoes

Snoop Dog / Kid Cudi

That Tree

Diplo Street Remix / M.I.A.

Paper Planes

Hold On, We're Going Home Drake / Majid Jordan

Sia / The Weeknd / Diplo

Elastic Heart

End of Time Beyoncé / 4

Beat of My Drum

Nicola Roberts

MØ / Diplo / Bikini Daze EP XXX 88

Aerosol Can feat. Pharrell Williams

Major Lazer / Apocalypse Soon

Diplo / Nicky Da B Express Yourself

Trampoline feat. 2 Chainz

Tinie Tempah

Diplo / Revolution

Biggie Bounce

C'mon feat. Diplo

Tiësto

Follow nexusmagazine on Spotifiy.

nexus magazine

ALAIN RESNAIS: 1922-2014 Auteur Dr Richard Swainson

At the beginning of March Alain Resnais, the legendary French director,

an intense drama in which the relationship between a French woman and

premiered at the Berlin Film Festival.

Japanese man provokes memories in the former of a love affair she had

Few directors had a career as long as Resnais. He first picked up a cam-

during the German occupation with an enemy soldier. It uses flash-back,

era in 1936 as a 14 year old. Whilst World War II delayed his professional

narration and a non-linear structure to startling effect. If Resnais was too

debut, he began working as a documentarian a decade later. Night and

old to technically be part of the French New Wave, Hiroshima, Mon Amour

Fog, his 1955 film about the Holocaust, put him on the map. Just under

inspired his younger colleagues and anticipates their experimentation with

three-quarters of an hour in length, its distanced, intellectual approach to

narrative and form.

a horrifying subject was ground-breaking and has since only been rivalled

With his next film the director's reputation peaked. Last Year in

in the field of Shoah documentaries by the epic work of Claude Lanzmann.

Marienbad is an intellectual puzzle, a purposely confusing love triangle in

Resnais intercuts between new, colour shots of Auschwitz, contempo-

which events, locations and time frames are forever shifting. An unlikely

rary footage of the gas chambers and material filmed as the camps were

box office hit, it became one of the cinematic sensations of the early 1960s,

being liberated, linking the transitions with a probing voice-over scripted

provoking endless debate. It also saw the director criticised for being

by Holocaust survivor Jean Cayrol. Resnais' collaboration with Cayrol, a noted poet, was the first of many associations with respected writers. Though celebrated as an auteur in his

an emotionally cold formalist. The accusation stuck. However beautiful Resnais' framing and ceaselessly moving camerawork, his ability to move or even engage with an audience is up for question.

own right, throughout his career Resnais always consciously shared the

While nothing in the balance of Resnais' 68 year career compares to

authorship of his work with these talented scribes, never himself taking a

these films, he retained his eye and craftsmanship to the last and was

screenplay credit. In fact, the consistency of Resnais' style and thematic

capable of wry, surrealist wit. Auteur House stocks much of his recent

concerns in some ways constitutes proof of the auteur theory itself, given

work as well as the classic material. To watch Resnais' 2009 feature

that he worked with a number of different writers yet his films were always

Wild Grass is to marvel at the energy and vision of an eternally young

recognisably his own.

87 yearÂ old.

War, guilt, memory and loss were the early ideas explored by Resnais.

His debut feature from 1959 is arguably his best. Hiroshima, Mon Amour is

died at the age of 91. Less than three weeks earlier his last feature had

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

ART POLITICS RELIGION Arts & Stuff Peter Dornauf

Back at the very beginning when the University of Waikato was not

Speaking of Chapel and musing about art and death, a question presents

much more than the twinkle in the eye of its founders, (the very early

itself. When Jesus was rising up into the clouds on his way to heaven, forty

1960’s) they made their first purchase of an artwork, a sculptural cre-

days after the resurrection, did he take a packed lunch? Because as we

ation by Molly Macalister. The piece was entitled The Last of the Just,

now know, thanks to the Hubble telescope, it’s a long way out there. And

made of concrete in a style that fused both classical and expressionistic

did he take a thermos because it can get pretty cold as well. I’ve studied

elements. It depicted a wounded man on his knees and was a direct ref-

the masters, Rembrandt and others who’ve depicted this ‘event’, but I’ve

erence to the Russian invasion of Hungary in 1956, where what began

never detected any backpack.

as a student revolt against Soviet rule was crushed within a month of it starting, leaving two and a half thousand Hungarians dead. That history

Now before all the liberals out there sniggering into their New Testaments say, oh it’s not literal you chump, how come it was up until just recently?

repeats (the Ukrainian revolt and subsequent invasion by Russian troops

I’ll tell you why. Because science forced them to flip flop. They were

into the Crimea) on the anniversary of that first purchase must be the

happy enough to take it literal for nearly two thousand years until astron-

supreme irony.

omy made them look foolish.

I well remember the sculpture in 1967 when I first attended the univer-

So they save face by calling it symbolic. That’s a neat fall-back manoeuvre,

sity as a fresh faced youth. It was at that time housed indoors, inside what

but what’s it symbolic of? Theologians have been scratching their heads

was later to become A Block. I recall on one occasion, as I walked by to

on this one since Wellhausen. Most of it gets watered down to the airy

enter the lecture theatre, spontaneously thrusting my motorbike helmet

concept of hope. Now hope’s a tricky business. I hope the redhead likes

onto the figure’s head. Slightly gauche, I know. Nevertheless on reflection,

me. I hope the bi-op doesn’t show malignant. The big hope in the Christian

given the political context linked to the piece, my instinctive and adolescent

system is to do with death; hope based on literally not really dying after

action, in hindsight, turned out to be quite apt. Protestors and helmets etc.

death but continuing to live on in some literal happy hereafter. But if the

The sculpture now resides on the south side of the Lady Goodfellow Chapel overlooking the lake.

stuff it’s grounded on is not literal, then where are we? Wishing on a star. Playing subterfuge with words.

PHOTOGRAPH BY MORGAHNA GODWIN

nexus magazine

LONÐØN Overseas Experience Patrick Ryan

Where are you? London, United Kingdom. What are your 'must do'

last but not least black swans. The manicured grounds are beautiful as

things while at this place? London has something to offer the shop-

well, quintessentially English like something out of Downton Abbey. After

per from all walks of life. While this diversity is amazing, it can seem

you’ve had your fill of critter spotting, wind your way to Buckingham Palace

overwhelming at first. Word of advice, pace yourself - devote a sizable

and pay Liz a visit.

chunk of time to each area of the megalopolis. Op-shopping in the East, in

Experiencing ‘The Tube’ is paramount for a London visit but isn’t the

Shoreditch (‘Shorebitch’ if you’re a raging hipster) is a must for those one-

most glamorous mode of transportation. Truth be told, there isn’t much

off items and people-watching. Expect to see a lot of tattooed, mustache

to experience or look at underground, save for the occasional rat, some

sporting, bowler hat wearing, cigarette toting blokes and girls who look

multi-coloured mosaics at certain stations and buskers playing Eighties’

like they’ve sashayed straight off the set of Clueless and into 2014. The

power-ballads on accordions, and thus a lot of precious sight-seeing time

Brits have an amazing selection of high-street stores and Oxford Street

is wasted. The best way to see the city in all its red-bus glory is in fact

is the jewel in the crown of the high-street institution - the prices along

on a Boris bike. Several years ago the mayor of London, Boris Johnson,

this street are reasonable and the clothes on trend, making it a perfect

implemented a project to combat the increasingly sedentary lifestyle of

choice for cash-strapped graduates. Just don’t visit in the weekend, it’s a

the London workforce. He partnered with Barclays, creating a public bike

mosh-pit. If you’re a foodie, Borough Market is your one-stop shop for all

that is an aesthetic monstrosity but incredibly convenient. There are numer-

things edible. This place is a treasure-trove of treats, but doesn’t give up its

ous docking stations full of these bikes (depending on the time) scattered

secrets easily. Every stall brims with scrumptious food but the ones with

throughout the city, as far out as Zone 3 and they are available to anyone

the tastiest are known only to locals - keep your eyes peeled for signs of

and everyone, even the homeless. At the cost of a few pounds, a bike is

Londoner activity and train those hands up before you visit so they’re at

yours for a whole day. Cycling routes weave in and out of the city and pass

the ready to snatch free samples.

your own route and discovering the city for yourself. Don’t worry about

fully novel wildlife, which includes an incredibly tame and brazen population

getting stranded because there’s always a bus-stop and/or Tube station

of squirrels (I saw one scurry up a man’s leg and eat from his hand), peli-

around the corner that connects you to the rest of London, so be ambitious

cans that look appropriately regal enough to be in earshot of the Queen,

just don’t visit Stockwell, A.K.A Stabwell without splurging on a stab-vest.

a cosmopolitan mix of geese, ducks and unidentifiable water birds and

famous landmarks like the Tower of London, but the real fun lies in taking

Take a stroll through St James’s Park, keeping an eye out for the delight-

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

I AM THE WALRUS Awesome Dead Person Mike Bilodeau

Sometimes history brings you a man who chooses to stand in front of father time only to slap him in his big, beardy face with a large, smelly, unwashed penis. Ladies and Gentleman, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle was that man. For as fat and walrus-ey (walrus-esque?) as he was, the prolific author of the Sherlock Holmes series was as close to superhero/timecop/warlock as we tend to get in the bland realities of real life. Edinburgh born in 1859, Doyle quickly set about dominating every aspect of human achievement. You know where he got the inspiration for his life-changing character, Mr Sherlock Holmes? Real life inspiration from Professor Joseph Bell, for whom Doyle was acting as surgeon’s clerk during his medical studies at Edinburgh University. During the Boer War of South Africa 1899-1902, in which he was appointed senior physician, he was also writing propaganda articles for the war effort. In fact, his nice little knighthood, which you may have noticed in his title, was not for his work as a fiction author but for his propaganda piece, ‘The War in South Africa: It’s Cause and Conduct’. Okay, up till this stage, it’s admittedly all a bit same-samey. He can write and he can doctor, we get it. Did I mention he was also a professional cricketer and the captain of the Crowborough Beacon Golf Club? And, as bullshit-ey (bullshit-esque?) as it sounds, he played an integral part in introducing the Swiss people to the sport of skiing? Or even, that he was one of the earliest motorists (and subsequent racecar driver) in Britain, competing on behalf of the Brits in the Prince Henry of Prussia international road competition against the Germans? That’s right, in 1911, 3 years before the kick-off of WWI, Doyle was already givin’ the Kraut’s the ol’ British what-for. The real piece of what-the-fucker-ey comes when you find out that, in his spare time (which he still had apparently) he was out and about solving crimes. Like... real life crimes with real life dead people. Using his patented (and totally made

“...AS BULLSHIT-EY (BULLSHIT-ESQUE?) AS IT SOUNDS, HE PLAYED AN INTEGRAL PART IN INTRODUCING THE SWISS PEOPLE TO THE SPORT OF SKIING”

up) method of detective-ing, Doyle investigated the murder of Marion Gilchrist, uncovering new evidence, questioning old evidence and recalling witnesses. The accused, Mr Oscar Slater, was released from prison and offered £6000.00 compensation for false imprisonment. This was not the first time when he had gone all Sherlock Holmes either and his previous cases partially resulted in the establishment of the Court of Criminal Appeal in 1907. We do have to remember that, while doing all of the above, he was still writing (and running for Parliament, but there’s only so much space in this column). Not just the Sherlock Holmesnovels either, which made but a small portion of his total bibliography, but hundreds of books, poems, short stories and historical novels. Now, tell me again about how you’re too busy to study and work at the same time.

nexus magazine

THEY CALL IT

FAILURE

FOR A REASON.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

So you failed a paper. Life goes on, your degree will probably go on and you will have learnt some valuable lessons (just probably not the one’s pertaining to the course structure). Now that I’ve built you up, let me completely break you down again. Sara Lemme I’m not going to sugar coat it, failing a paper does, occa-

mentioned above, Key and Joyce are watching you and they

sionally, have some relatively academically-severe and

want you to know it. Failing papers can screw you over finan-

financially-severe effects. This is usually however more to

cially, but again, it’s about how many you fail in any given

do with HOW many papers you fail in one semester or year or

period. In order to qualify for the student allowance, you need

if you fail the SAME paper more than once, especially if it’s a

to have passed more than half of your full-time tertiary course

requirement of your degree.

in your last study period. So if you did 8 papers last year, you

Despite all the flak we get here at little ol’ Waikato, re-entry

need to have passed 5.

criteria from one semester and year to the next does actually

Then you also have the rolling 5 year assessment calculator

exist. Essentially, you just have to pass SOMETHING during

that Studylink uses to determine whether you have passed at

“THIS ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH TO POPPA KEY AND GRANNY JOYCE AS YOU’LL FIND OUT... ”

a semester to be allowed into the next one. Re-entry criteria

least half your total EFTS from all previous study. This affects

does vary with some degrees (Law, Education, Teaching and

your student loan. So if you’ve failed papers before, you’ll

Conjoint degrees) but for most re-entry means passing at least

need to be careful and check if your total failed papers doesn’t

half of the total points (not papers) you undertook. Though this

exceed your passed ones.

isn’t good enough to Poppa Key and Granny Joyce as you’ll find out below. There is something scary called ‘Exclusion for Unsatisfactory

Just remember there is usually always an appeal process available for any decision, so seek advice- like from the advocate at WSU. If you think you’re going to fail for reasons

Progress from Particular Papers’. This is referring to students

beyond your control, read the shit out of the Options feature

“who have failed a paper, or any equivalent or substantially sim-

over the page ASAP. But no matter what happens, remember

ilar paper, on a second or subsequent enrolment”.You won’t be

that failing a paper isn’t indicative of a low intelligence or of

able to re-enrol in that paper (EXCLUDED, punks!) and if it’s a

laziness. So when you find yourself judging someone else- or

compulsory paper for your degree, you’ll be booted out of your

even yourself for failing, it’s important to remember that the

degree altogether. You can appeal, but it’s not going to be fun.

difference between only-just-passing and failing, can be as

Studylink has a beautiful, muscle-tensing, teeth-clenching

small as the difference between 49 and 50. And that 1% (or

way of just being the bane of all students’ existence. As I

maybe 15%) doesn’t mean anything in the Hunger Games.

WHAT TO DO WHEN SHIT GOES

nexus magazine

In trouble and think you might fail a paper? Missed that first assignment and already failed one? Keep calm and don't disappear. Here's our guide to minimising the damage when shit goes south! Ms Y. You’re enrolled, Studylink has finally agreed to pay you,

pet turtle grief. Make an appointment through student health

you’ve recovered from your O-Week hangover and Uni

or look them up on the Uni website.

is looking pretty sweet. Then BAM! Life takes a swipe at

Within your faculty you can talk to a lecturer, administrator,

you. Maybe you’ve fallen off a bar and broken your leg in

student advisor or mentor. If you need an extension on your

three places. Maybe your beloved pet turtle has gone to the

assignment or some extra assistance, your lecturer or tutor

big pond in the sky. Perhaps you’ve witnessed a mob hit and

are the best ones to talk to.

have to go into witness protection – whatever the thing, sud-

If there’s no-one in your faculty you feel comfortable talking

denly writing 3000 words on Festinger’s theory of cognitive

to, the friendly folk at the Student Info desk in the Student

dissonance is way down your priority list. It can be tempting at times like these to find the nearest

Centre (where the library is) can point you in the right direction. The Waikato Students’ Union (WSU) has advocacy officers

dark corner, curl up into a little ball, put your fingers in your

who can help you. Stacy the coffee guy is also pretty good to

ears and yell LAALAALAALAA when anyone tries to talk to

talk to, although we can’t guarantee he’ll have useful advice

you. It might even feel like study will never be important again.

about University processes.

But mostly, the hard times end and you want to give yourself Withdraw from your paper(s).

the best chance of being able to pick up where you left off. Disappearing off the face of the earth (or the campus) with a trail of fail grades in your wake is not the best way to do this, so if you find yourself in a pickle, here’s some things

Contrary to popular belief, just stopping going to class and not handing in any assignments does not mean you’ve withdrawn from your paper. In fact, if you don’t withdraw officially

you can do.

you’ll end up with an incomplete grade, an IC, which is the Talk to someone!

same as a big fat fail. And you don’t want that if you can avoid it.

The University really wants you to graduate. Really. Partly

According to the regs, you have until 5.00pm on the second

because they love you for the special snowflake you are, and

Friday of semester to withdraw from a paper and get your

partly because the Government can take money off them if

money back (or give Studylink the money back, those thieving

you don’t stay and complete your qualification. So they really

bastards). You have until the sixth Friday to withdraw from

want to help you get through the tough times and get back

your paper but forfeit the fee. I know- yikes, but it’s better

on track. But no-one can help you if they don’t know what’s

than losing your money AND having a fail on your transcript.

going on.

If shit has hit the fan big time though, you can appeal to

The University Counsellors are free and can give you advice

withdraw at any stage in the semester (or even sometimes

on regulatory Uni stuff as well as how to work through your

after it), and you can appeal to get a full or partial fees refund.

nexus magazine

You’ll only be considered if you have genuinely crappy circum-

By the way, if you just got wasted the night before and

stances though. A dead turtle’s probably not going to cut it.

you’re still spewing when you should be doing your exam, you

And you’ll need proof in the shape of medical certificates or

ain’t gonna get spec con. Just saying.

whatever. (It’s not that they don’t trust you it’s just that other Appealing for re-entry to the University.

people lie). You’ll need to write to the Head of Student and Academic Services if you want to appeal.

If you did just disappear from campus without a trace, with Special Consideration. If you manage to get all the way to exam week before life

a trail of fail grades in your wake, there’s still hope! At the end of A Semester, if you’ve failed all your papers, or at the end of the year if you haven’t passed more than half your

whacks you over the head, so that you’ve aced all the internals

points, you’ll get a letter from the Uni telling you that you

but miss or blow the exam, never fear. You can apply for spe-

have to submit an appeal if you want to come back. Do it!

“CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, JUST STOPPING GOING TO CLASS AND NOT HANDING IN ANY ASSIGNMENTS DOES NOT MEAN YOU’VE WITHDRAWN FROM YOUR PAPER.”

cial consideration for your exam. Maybe you were abducted

If you have a good reason, or even if you just spent more

by aliens had a car crash on the way to your exam, woke up

time at the Outback than the library and you’re honest about

going from both ends (eww), or perhaps your beloved Great

it (and it’s your first time ineligible), they’ll most likely give

Aunt Gertrude passed away in the night and you have ren-

you another shot.

dered your exam paper illegible with the tears of your grief – if

Don’t forget that the worst thing you can do is rush back

you have missed an exam due to circumstances beyond your

to study before you’re really ready. Uni will wait for you, and

control, or you feel your performance was seriously impaired

most undergraduate quals (except teaching) don’t have a time

(in the EXAM, don’t be filthy), get yourself a Spec Con form

limit.

from Student Info or Student Health. You HAVE to apply within 72 hours of your exam and you HAVE to have evidence of consultation with a relevant medi-

the regs are online at calendar.waikato.ac.nz, and the Student

cal professional within that timeframe. The Counsellors have

Info team and the WSU Advocacy Officers can give you all

drop-in sessions during the exam period for that reason –

the deets.

come to Student Info for details.

It’s a lot to remember, and you don’t need to remember it... until you do. But don’t worry your pretty little heads. All

nexusmag.co.nz

See you at Graduation!

nexus magazine

Study and the Single Mum. ANONYMOUS

Studying is tricky enough at the best of times, but how the hell do you manage it when you're a single parent? Nexus finds out... If you don’t have a child, I can assure you that my univer-

during the day and I was happy learning. I found that I wasn’t

sity life is a lot easier than yours. You heard right, easier. I

all that bad at University either, which gave me the confidence

am not here to pursue an interest in which I would like to

to start my degree in Law.

invest a substantial amount of time in because my purpose has been simplified: my purpose is to provide for another. By thirteen I’d left high school and begun a few psychedelic

During the beginning of my parent and university life I discovered how important social and support networks were. This discovery easily directed me to aiding in the support

years with a group of wacky high school drop-outs. But by

of others, especially children. The CUP tutors and Campus

the end of these years the drop-outs had become sad and

Crèche staff are considerate of the timetable of a parent/

scattered.

student, but once learning the ropes it is easy to balance the

I was fifteen when I fell pregnant (cue sharp intake of

two in a way beneficial to the both of us. I must admit that

breath). I’d never felt so happy… in hindsight I know that this

coming back to university feels a little more like a break than

is because I knew I had the ability to raise a child well and

the holidays do however.

both needed and wanted to take this flashing-green exit sign from my surroundings.

If not for having a child, I probably wouldn’t be at University, have made the home I have, or developed the morals and the

After two years of being a stay at home Mum, I started CUP

values I did; I most certainly would not be in the latter half of

at Waikato. I did this for many reasons, partly because after

a Bachelor of Law with a DM in Psych by 20. In trying to think

two years of mothering, I was quite ready to (occasionally)

about the challenges that come with balancing being a single

think about something other than babies.

Mum and University, I can only think of how being a single

Starting University gave me a load of stuff I hadn’t had

Mum has taught me lessons like perseverance, patience, con-

before, this whole new individual life where my brain could

fidence, hard work; how to cope with stress, sleep deprivation,

be happily occupied.

time management and PAIN - just kidding, parenting is awe-

It came with mornings full of rushing and evenings full of

some. It stops you from caring about the bigger picture so

packing bags, cramming in being mum, praying for sleep, and

much, and gives you time to realise how to draw happiness

preparing for the next morning rush. But it was worth it: my

from the smaller things in life… like coffee.

son was happy being a ruckus boy at the University crèche

nexus magazine

Dr Norman Kingsbury, lifetime member of the WSU, Godfather of Tertiary Education and man before his time talks to Nexus about his “think big” visions for Waikato uni, sex in the 60s and how we got to where we are today. Rachael Elliott

Why isn’t there a building with your name on it? I never

Co-habitation for men and women was very controversial

really sought names and money I’ve just been interested

when the Halls opened. Did that make things difficult? Of

in the work. I’ve got a lot of experience and I came to the

course, 1964, the year that this university opened was also

conclusion that people in high positions are not necessar-

the year that sex was invented. (Laughs) before that if it

ily right and that’s quite a useful thing. I don’t have much

existed at all it only existed within the confines of marriage

enthusiasm for the Prime Minister but I shall curb my

and for procreational purposes only.

antagonism (when I see him this week) and smile politely.

So, yes, there was a big public outcry and we were

Tell us about your involvement with Student Village. There

caught in the middle of people who wanted to lock up all

were a lot of very difficult things politically because I was

the young people until they got married and the people

very keen to have a situation where students were taught

who were very liberal. We had to manage that because

to face the consequences of what they did, they had to

the people with the conservative ideas were generally the

make the decisions. We designed the Student Village first

people who have the money.

with the small apartments where people could lock their

I think the halls turned out fairly well. I’m out of touch

door. We had counsellors but essentially people had to

with how things are now, but there isn’t really an alternative

make their own judgements. Someone who ran halls in

to people taking responsibility for themselves.

Otago who was very traditional came up (without an invita-

You were the Chairman of the Tertiary Education Advisory

tion) and said we really must redesign them so they had

in 2000. What was that like? A lot of the ideas we had

one big front door that they could lock at 10pm at night.

on that commission were not implemented. I wanted it

But everyone knows that when you have a door you lock

to be several people who knew a lot about tertiary educa-

at 10pm you always leave a window open.

tion making the detailed decisions about where the money

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

would go and if there were going to be limitations placed

wouldn’t otherwise be there and the student loan scheme

on numbers in courses they would decide on those. I

was one way.

thought that Pharmac model was a good one but the state

You worked very closely with Don Llewellyn. What was

services commission didn’t like that idea- they wanted

he like? I was very lucky because Don never once told me

everything like a pyramid up to the Minister, who had to

to shut up (and I know people told him that he should.)

decide everything. It’s not within the capacity of one per-

My wife and I were always very involved in groups against

son no matter how clever they are to make that number of

racism, support for homosexual law reform, anti-apartheid.

decisions in that sort of detail. I think there has been a lack

It was very controversial in those days but it was the only

of direction- it didn’t turn out as well as I would have liked.

way I could go on being a real person.

There are people there trying to get it back on track but it’s

The Waikato times in the early years had a pro South

quite complicated as Steven Joyce has quite strong views

Africa columnist who thought apartheid was the only way

of his own. I am very doubtful about a system where one

to run things. He would write his columns and then I would

person on the top of the pyramid controls things.

write letters or make public statements. And people asked

What was your vision for Waikato University? Waikato

me “do you think that’s wise?” but I would say “well, if

began as a grassroots thing and eventually we gave up

we’re going to establish an independent thinking univer-

“...STUDY THE THING THAT REALLY TURNS YOU ON BECAUSE IN 5 YEARS’ TIME YOU MAY HAVE FOUND THAT YOU HAVE A DEGREE IN SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE MAY NOT WANT ANYMORE.”

this idea of the class as a whole and moved to our current

sity where people can have political views we should be

situation (individual learning focused) which now, most uni-

modelling it instead of keeping our mouths shut because

versities have but at the time was quite revolutionary. The

if we all keep our mouths shut what’s the point of having

UoA moved to it about 15 years later and put a big thing in

a university at all?”

the paper about how they’d had this great idea ignoring the

When Don was away and I couldn’t consult him as an

fact that 80 miles down the road was a place that had been

administrator I could do one of two things. The safe option

doing it for a number of years.

which was say there, there, we can’t do anything about it

How did the Student Loan scheme come about? I was

or I could go ahead and do and ask for approval afterwards.

involved in developing it mainly because both parties of

So one day when Don came back from the East Coast he

government at that stage were very committed to high

said “anything happen while I was away?” and I said “Well

student fees. In fact, one of the commissions that I tried

I’ve started a Maori Department.” And he said “oh good”

to sabotage wanted to do away with government subsidies

and it was a great success.

altogether, which would have destroyed the possibility for equitable enrolment. If I’d had my way I would have had no fees and just let

What advice would you give students today? When friends and family ask me what they should study to get a good job I tell them- study the thing that really turns you on

students come in, but that wasn’t an option. Now I think

because in 5 years’ time you may have found that you have

the problems have come home to roost.

a degree in something that people may not want anymore.

I’ve had very strong view that the university should make

Do the things you can be enthusiastic about.

a big effort to encourage people into the university that

nexus magazine

DAY DRINKING, NIGHT DRINKING. Carnage Jules Craft

O-week is fucked up. Who ever created the idea of drinking

drinking always is the best kind of drinking; I just hope I can

for 7 days straight could only have been both an alcoholic and

catch up on a few of the lectures I missed.

a nut job. Don’t get me wrong I love a good old piss-sinking

On the Sunday before O-week Louis and I, in collabora-

marathon interrupted only by shorts bursts of cutting shapes

tion with the boys at the Snead Pussy Palace, threw a “little

up in the 101 jungle and the Outback, but it’s taken a toll on my

swaray” which involved about 150 students, DJ Bones from

brain plasma. This year is my first experience flatting and I’m

outback (gear included), and a shit ton of Wizard Sticks. On

a little scared because I’m living with like-minded individuals.

supposedly the quietest day of the year we managed to put

Now I hear you say “That can’t be so bad.” Maybe you’re stuck

together an after-pool party that had the funky tunes flying

in a random flat with strangers, or you have a not-so-desirable

through the neighbourhood and caught the police’s atten-

neighbour who you will be forced to live with for the rest of

tion several days in advance. There were people on the roof,

the year in the halls- but living with like-minded individuals will

wizard stick fighting, and a nifty little strobe to make those

get you into way more trouble.

dance moves look even trippier. I must confess my Wizard

You see, this last week there was no escaping the perilous

stick got too long too early and I have to take a power nap

clutches of peer pressure. Every time you’re about to go to a

half way through the night but by all accounts, after I became

lecture one of your best mates is holding a double brown in his

sleeping beauty the night was an absolute success. Big ups to

left hand, he’s half chopped, and he’s asking you to drink with

Outback/101 staff, the WSU, and the Snead residence. If you

him. I mean, I’m only human, what kind of headstrong person

have any “little swarays” coming up that you’d like me to write

could say no to an offer like that at 11 in the morning? Day time

about just send us and invite haha. Chea Crafty Out.

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

FINGER-LICKIN' GOOD Aunty Slut

Dear Aunty Slut,

tasty pussy. If you’re into that sort of thing.

My girlfriend loves it when I eat her out, but I hate it. She refuses to

If you’re not, maybe you should try sucking cock. It might be more

shave, and I’m not all that keen on doing it if she hasn’t had a shower

to your taste. There’s nothing wrong with sucking cock, in fact, Aunty

either. I wish we could just do the things we both like doing instead

Slut personally recommends it.

of spending ages ‘down there’. Sometimes she doesn’t even seem to enjoy it. How can I tell her all this without hurting her feelings? Tongue tired. Dear Tongue tired,

But I think you’re missing the entire point here. 3) When you give someone oral sex, it’s not about you. You do it to make your partner feel good. If you practice, you can make them feel great, or even, really, really great. That’s the point- making sure

Three things: 1) Porn vulvas are like hippogriffs- they don’t actually exist. Unlike the ones you see in porn, real life vulvas aren’t usually dyed, bleached or surgically altered. Sometimes, they aren’t even shaved or waxed. I’ll tell you the secret reason why- vulvas actually have hair. Well- vulvas

“...not ‘lavender’ not ‘frangipani’ not fucking ‘ylang ylang’PUSSY. Salty, musky, savoury pussy. Tasty, tasty pussy.”

that you should be interested in have hair. Liking a vulva that isn’t hairy is just wrong- and in some cases, illegal. Vulvas have hair for a practical reason too- so they don’t get chafed

your partner is feeling really, really great should be your priority during

to all hell during sex. While I personally like to keep my garden well

any kind of sexual encounter. If you’re in it just for you, then maybe

weeded, that doesn’t mean that anyone else does- or that you get

you should just be with yourself and your hand and leave the poor

to dictate to your partner what her cunt should look like. Pussies are

girl out of it.

hairy. Get used to it. 2) When I go out for dinner, I look carefully at the menu and choose something I’d like to eat. If I choose a curry, I don’t complain that it’s

If she’s not enjoying it- talk to her. Ask her what feels good. Ask her what she likes and then- do what she says! Don’t be selfish- be legendary.

spicy. If I choose an ice cream, I don’t complain that it’s cold. And

And if all else fails, get a tongue piercing.

if I choose the fish, I certainly don’t complain that it tastes like fish.

Much love, Aunty Slut.

Pussy is supposed to taste like pussy- not ‘lavender’ not ‘frangipani’ not fucking ‘ylang ylang’- PUSSY. Salty, musky, savoury pussy. Tasty,

Send your sexy sex questions to auntyslut@nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

EVEN OPTIMISTS HATE STUDYLINK

I'LL DRINK IF I WANT TO

The Foreign Invasion Melody Wilkinson

Louise vs the World Louise Hutt

While applying for a student loan from Study Link for the third time,

I’m a pretty busy person, so when I see an opportunity to streamline

I realized it has not gotten any easier. I know they don’t owe it to me to

my life, I take it. This happened when I moved house; I could have (and

make it any easier because they are loaning me money and, if I asked a

should have) had a good catch up with each of my friends I hadn’t seen over

friend to borrow 5 bucks, I would not be surprised if they rolled their eyes

the summer, but I thought to myself, “if I disguise this as a flat warming,

a bit. So maybe the completely ridiculous online maze that is Study Link is

then I get to see everyone at once!” What I didn’t expect was a text from

just them rolling their eyes at us continually asking for money. Maybe they

one of my friends asking about the alcohol quantity. “Just wondering if

view us like the friend who constantly forgets their wallet when you have

there’s going to be lots of drinking? As a recovering alcoholic, it’s not really

all gone out to dinner. But I do have a problem with one of the questions in

good for me to be around that kind of thing”.

particular. I was, on the whole, very frustrated going through this process

I don’t need to tell you how prevalent the youth drinking culture is in

late at night (my first mistake… always take on Study Link when you are

New Zealand. The media happily tell you everyday; just read the Waikato

well rested, caffeinated and fed). Also DO NOT under any circumstances

Times, who blamed O Week for 16 year olds drinking in Melville and caus-

attempt to apply for a loan using Windows 8, because Windows 8 has a

ing trouble. We get bombarded with advertisements telling us we’re a “bloody idiot” if we drink drive, or not to be a

“I JUST LIKE SPENDING MY EVENINGS FIGHTING WITH A WEBSITE FOR FUN, JUST TO SEE IF THEY WOULD GIVE ME MONEY I WOULD THEN HAVE TO PAY BACK WITH MONEY FROM A CAREER THAT I DON’T HAVE...”

“cool dad” for giving alcohol to minors; all of them sounding naff and lame, like a telling off from your mum. Recently there have been new advertisements, this time focusing on our inability to allow others to refuse a drink. Mostly they focus on reasons like “I’m driving” or “I have work in the morning”, more casual reasons than “I’m a recovering alcoholic” but still valid

mind of its own and it is not a very smart mind. So halfway through, when trying to click on the town you live in, Windows 8 will take you to the start page, six times. YES… 6!) Anyway, my particular problem was with the question “Do you want to pay for this study with your student loan?” Now, I found myself yelling rather sarcastically, “No I don’t want to use the student loan money to pay for classes at a University. I just like spending my evenings fighting with a website for fun, just to see if they would give me money I would then have to pay back with money from a career that I don’t have because I never went to University but spent the time to get the student loan for the University just for the hell of it.” I also managed to yell at my husband in the process that he was “not a helpful person.” So thanks Study Link, you have made me crazy and mean. But, to be fair, Windows 8 should share some of the blame. So, Windows 8, please stop, just stop trying to pretend to be an Apple computer and stick to what you do best – sort of following commands. When you try to be all smart and decide what I want to do before I have asked you to do it, it makes me want to smash my laptop and then where would I be? Using my Student loan to pay for a new computer.

nexusmag.co.nz

reasons nonetheless. I escaped drinking at many of the parties I went to in high school because of the two former reasons, but not without people trying to force a drink in my hand. Somehow we equate this as said person trying to be “better” than everyone else at the party, or they’re as uncool as the ads on TV. I know people who don’t drink because their parents and grandparents were alcoholics, or because they see alcohol as “a way for society to control the poor and working classes”, or because they simply don’t like the taste of it. Whatever the reason, we need to start respecting their choices, not because they’re trying to be better than the drinkers or because they’re uncool, but because we should respect that other people know what’s best for them. Finding out that a friend of mine was a recovering alcoholic at the age of nineteen broke my heart, and if it becomes okay to not have a drink at a party, then maybe there will be less stories in the media, less fatalities on our roads and less violence on Saturday nights.

nexus magazine

CRIMEA RIVER – A BRIEF EXPLANATION OF THE CURRENT UKRAINIAN CLUSTERFUCK. Give a Shit Tee-Ship

As I sit down to write this the situation in Ukraine and particularly

reneged on a long planned trade agreement with the European Union. It

the Crimean Peninsula has intensified to a point where my limited

was expected to strengthen Ukraine’s European ties and boost the coun-

understanding of international politics can’t help but cry out with

try’s economy. The agreement which was originally offered in 2012 —under

desperation, “Please, my friends, can we not all settle down to a nice

the conditions that Ukraine’s government addressed key issues regarding

shot of vodka and a good hearty bowl of borscht?” And yet, all racial

the integrity of their democratic system and rule of law, including the unfair

stereotypes aside I can’t help but wonder in my apocalyptic, conspiratorial,

imprisonment of former Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko,— was thrown

anxiety driven, internet-fuelled 21st century mind, could this be the straw

out with no warning, enraging a large portion of the country’s population.

that breaks the World War Three camel’s back? Fear not my faithful readers,

And so in an act of defiance the Ukrainian people took to the streets

I am prone to bouts of delusional fear-mongering. However the situation is

in what were at first, as they generally all are, peaceful demonstrations

a worry nevertheless. As 45 million Ukranians wait with bated breath for an

in Kiev’s Maidan Nezalezhnosti or Independence Square. On the night of

explosion of the potential powder keg that this situation is, I feel it is once

November the 30th Berkut Special Police Units undertook a brutal raid

again necessary to shed a little light on the cause of what is gearing up to

on the square in an effort to clear the demonstrators (mostly made up

be a major international relations SNAFU for Russia and what is already a

of students who put up no resistance.) Armed with an arsenal of stun

shitty time for Ukraine. Civil unrest in the Ukrainian capital of Kiev kicked off on the night of

grenades, batons and tear gas while blocking mobile phone communications, the police brutally cleared the square of protesters and innocent

21st November of 2013 when people found out that Ukrainian president

bystanders alike, chasing them out while beating and detaining many, even

Viktor Yanukovych had bowed down to mounting Russian pressure and

allegedly assaulting a photographer and cameraman for international news

nexus magazine

agency Reuters. The brutality of the raid only served to spur on Ukrainians

control of Kiev and the Government had been ousted with President

more eventually joining the ranks of the Euromaidan (aptly named after

Yanukovych fleeing to Eastern Ukraine and eventually to the soft bosom

Maidan Nezalezhnosti.) By the 1st of December riots had begun to take

of the Kremlin.

place in several areas of Kiev in reaction to the brutality of the raid on

Right, so the Ukrainian government is gone burger, Yulia Tymoshenko

Independence Square; this also marked the first time a public building had

has been released from prison, everybody is having a hoot and a holler

been occupied by the Euromaidan.

Square and more riots. But by the 22nd of February protesters were in

and served as a catalyst for many people on the fence, with more and

and a good old time celebrating the fact that for once civil unrest has

Following the riots peaceful protesters once again returned to

produced something other than a giant pile of bodies and no change

Independence Square. In a move similar to the Occupy Wall Street move-

(instead a medium pile of bodies and big change) and then something

ment— but with an actual point— demonstrators set up an encampment

begins to smell strange on the Crimean Peninsula. Armed militia display-

in the square solidifying it as a sort of Euromaidan motherland. On the 8th

ing no military insignia but speaking Russian, wearing Russian designed

of December (a day billed as the “March of a Million”) protesters gathered

military fatigues and carrying Kalashnikov AK47 assault rifles (I assume)

in numbers estimated between 100,000 and 1,000,000, the largest gather-

are spotted patrolling the Crimean Airport. While Putin initially is all “Pffft

ing to date.

it’s just like whatever man” it’s obvious to the rest of the world what’s

For the sake of time I will gloss over the building of support in favor of the

really going on. And then BOOM in what is seemingly the plot of a Pierce

opposition and demonstrators. Put it this way, people were pissed. They

Brosnan era bond movie Putin snaps up the Crimean Peninsula in what

wanted their God damned EU agreement, they wanted their God damned

looks a lot like— and let’s not kid ourselves here— kind of a USSR rebuild

right of free speech, they wanted their God damned skulls un-cracked and

move…. Speculation? Absolutely. Conspiracy? You bet. Crazy? Maybe but

God damn it they wanted their democracy. God damn it!

you know you love it.

Fast-forward to February 18th. The calm of peaceful protest was shat-

So that brings us up to date at the time of printing. Now we have the

tered when 20,000 anti-government protesters said “Bra, fuck this bra!”

US barking sanctions at Russia, Ukraine saying “Cut it ouuuuuut” and the

and marched on Ukrainian Parliament. Thus began the bloodiest confronta-

rest of the world biting their nails. Do I think it will be World War Three?

tions of the crisis: police met with the demonstrators head on. 82 people

Nahhhhhh. But what do I know. You read the article. I can barely string a

were killed in the following days, including 13 policemen, while an addi-

sentence together let alone predict international relations. All I can say for

tional 1100 were injured. The next few days consisted of blow for blow raids

sure is I’m severely under-qualified for any of this. But hey, who are you

by protesters and police, burnt buildings, more raids on Independence

gonna trust— me or Mike McRoberts?

nexusmag.co.nz

nexus magazine

JUSTIN & BODY BLAST Road to Fitness Lauren Heginbotham

THE OFFICIAL TREND REPORT FOR AUTUMN 2014 Fashion Jessica Wilson

To say I was apprehensive about my visit to UniRec’s resident physiologist, the High Performance and Rehabilitation Consultant, is an understatement. I was feeling anything but a High Performance athlete when I met Justin, who had told me ahead of time that we’d be discovering how fit and fabulous I really was by doing a skin fold analysis, aka “calliper testing”. It all sounded very official, so it was time to google. Yes, I discovered it was. Its mission: to determine how much of my body is made up of fat (eek), whether it’s at a healthy level and finally, to assist in developing my future ‘fitness programme’ on my path to rediscover what it feels like to be fit and fabulous again. I had heard about skin folds through my partner (the professional athlete) who gets tested regularly by HPSNZ. He rocks a 32 for the sum of 8. No pressure then… Using massive tongs (callipers), my skin was pinched in eight different areas on its search for fat (no I sucking in). My stats: a sum of 77, 24% fat and 14kg of total body fat. I’m somewhat relieved when Justin says it’s smack bang in the middle of the healthy range. What the?! A gasp escapes

Some people are born perfect. As we all know, perfect people look good in anything. These people could wear Ed Hardy, or Supré, and still be sex on legs. Sadly, you're likely not one of these people. Luckily for you though, I'm here to help. Even if your face is built like a Picasso painting, you can easily become a regulation hottie by being on trend. Sportswear Yes, looking like you’re leaving to go to the gym (not from the gym, you sweaty beast) is still totally in. Why? Because people who work out are sexy. Unfortunately, sexy people do not need to read, so you’ll have to pass this message on to them for me. Vacuum Packaging Vacuumed packing is probably the hottest thing this season. At Iris van Herpen Autumn/Winter 2014, models were encased in massive vacuum packs strung from the ceiling, begging the questions: how did they breathe, and more importantly, is that legal? But it wasn’t just Herpens – who was

as I review the figures and discover my thighs are seriously letting me down…Squats anyone? It makes sense that I go through this before kicking off on my UniRec fitness programme. Justin says it’s a ‘rite of passage’ and it’s good for me

“ALL EYES WERE ON THE NAKED MAN, IN THE LEOPARD PRINT THONG AND CROWN...”

to know where I’ve started from in order to chart my progress over the year to come. He says that once I kick off my programme I’ll be increasing my muscle

getting in on the vac pack trend. At Chanel Autumn/Winter 2014, the classic

mass as well as my body's ability to burn fat. It’s actually a case of lard

2.55 bag was vacuum-packed as though it was some sort of couture meat.

being transformed into lean muscle mass. Easier said than done…

Was this to encourage us to reflect on the many uses of vacuum packing,

So.. about that programme…We debrief on lifestyle factors and I explain

or perhaps, to engage us with the concept of everything being finite, and

that my lapse in exercise is because I get bored very easily. Going from

how we are simply a speck on the interminable timeline of all that is, was,

machine to machine solo my mental aptitude wanes.

and every will be? No, it’s because vacuum packing looks fucking cool –

“No worries”, he says, “It sounds like you’re a Group Exercise kind of

and you can do it too. For as little as $6, you can grab a medium sized

person.” Well, I do like the sound of that. “Basic Step is the beginning, then

vacuum pack from The Warehouse. Pop it over your University bag and

you can move on to Pump and Stump. Go with a 6 week focus, little by

become the cool friend. You’re welcome.

little, do as many classes as you can, get comfortable, then change it up.”

Streaking

Apparently the focus is to get my heart rate up, whilst distracted by

I loved Prabal Gurung Autumn/Winter 2014. The Himalayan inspired

movement. I also learn that the body gets stronger the more it exerts

collection was awash with opulent colours, rich textures and unexpected

itself (101). The heart rate drops and the body becomes more efficient. I’m

draping. It was a refreshing new look for the Nepalese designer, who

ashamed to admit that this is definitely something I’ve been denying my

usually dabbles in more simplistic structures and vibrant colour palettes.

body for quite some time.

Alas, this is not why anyone paid attention to Mr Gurung this season. All

Perhaps prematurely, I ask if I can get straight into the Extreme Fit class...

eyes were on the naked man, in the leopard print thong and crown, as

The response? “Well Lauren, it just depends what your goals are. Do you

he did his little turn on the catwalk (yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk

want to take it to the next level or do you just want to get along?” A good

yeah). Granted, he wasn't much of a hit with fashion editors, with John

question to ponder, just not today. I’m sufficiently motivated to head off

Jannuzzi declaring in a GQ Magazine Online article "Most, including myself,

to my first Step class.

were unamused." (lol) He still went viral, and we all know viral is the more youthful and hip version of being fashionable.

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ROAST CHICKEN Cooking for Students Zac Lyon

Ok now that I have now landed back in New Zealand, I have the task of adjusting back into uni. After 4 years, it doesn’t get any easier! Anyway, this week it is a recipe everyone should know and be able to cook. The humble roast chicken. A flatting situation winner, served with a few roast veges this is the ideal Sunday night dinner! I have always maintained the key to anybody’s heart is through their stomach – so for you romantics out there, being able to smash out a good roast is key.

Ingredients 1 large chicken (free range if they are on special, ideally!) 1 lemon 1 handful of thyme 6 leaves of sage 1 sprig of rosemary 4-5 cloves of garlic (crushed skin on) Oil Salt and pepper

Directions 01_ Pat your chicken down (though not like your patting your cat) with some paper towels to dry it. 02_ Stab your lemon half a dozen times with a knife, go on let the anger out! 03_ While trying not to violate your chicken more than you need, insert the thyme, sage, garlic and rosemary into the cavity of the chicken and plug it up with the lemon. 04_ Set the chicken into a roasting pan, lovingly rub olive oil across the surface of the chicken, followed by a good sprinkling of ground pepper and salt. 05_ Throw the chicken into the oven (not like Leigh Hart – google ‘speed cooking’) at 180C and bake for 1 hour and 20-30 mins. 06_ To avoid giving people food poisoning, insert a knife into the breast of the chicken. The juices that come out should be clear. If pink, cook for 5-10 mins more and re-check. 07_ Tear of the chicken, break its little wings and legs off (though do it gently) and serve with some veges (Roast potatoes, kumara, pumpkin, peas, corn, beans).

It is not too hard to get it perfect, so give it a whirl. Again if you fullas still are scratching your heads, head over to Cooking4Students facebook page or youtube channel to see how it is done!

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SURVIVOR: WSU BOARD MARK SAVAGE

— This week the survivors started the same as they have since the dawn

principle but sounds way too much like grooming in practice. It’s also

of time, with a box of Waikato’s finest draught beer. All the castaways

probably the same philosophy OUSA were working on when they booked

bar Gabriel were present, apparently work commitments got in the way.

Shapeshifter, Macklemore & Lewis and Tiny Tempah.

Which leads this intrepid reporter to wonder if anyone had truly explained

Following Aaron’s third phone interruption the board moved on to the

the rules to this new class. It was my understanding that once a new board

website where Daniel reminded people that the WSU Board minutes had

of student government was sworn in all work, everywhere ceased. In that

not been updated on wsu.org.nz. Daniel was then reminded that Contact

sense it is the only true parallel between students and actual government.

FM had not been updated in three years which brought some laughter

Eager returning director and part time water dwelling mammal Daniel Farrell got the meeting off to a swift start passing two motions.

from the board and some eye rolling from Shannon Stewart who was clearly wondering what she was doing there.

Unfortunately like 90% of the board I fail to listen when he speaks but

After a few more minutes of Contact based jokes Aaron updated the

for the purpose of providing a complete run down let’s assume the first

board about NZUSA or as it is more commonly called the tribal council

was to build a golden calf on the green and the second was a decree that

for slow people.

everyone must listen to student radio at all times. Then the unthinkable occurred. Two non-members of the board entered the room. It would have been a game changer for student engagement had the two in question not been quickly identified as WSU Communications and Operations Managers James Raffan and Pene Delaney. The two were quick to address the group describing in vivid detail the barren apocalyptic hellscape known as Ori2014. “O-week is the biggest week of the year” said Delaney. “We can’t afford to screw it up. So you guys need to work hard and your shit sorted.” Raffan added “This year we have gone with young acts, rockquest winners, high schoolers and x-factor kids. That way they are grateful and keep

According to Aaron more non board members voted in the University Sports NZ election than members did and he preceded to run down why that was stupid while the glazed look returned to the castaways faces. He then said that Dan Haines (NZUSA President and fourth Hobbit from the left in the Desolation of Smaug) was doing a better job turning the organisation around but the jury was still out on the relationship with the WSU. The rest of the directors agreed because if there is one thing President Letcher knows a lot about it is a jury still being out. It had been a long meeting and, after taking a long sip of Waikato, Aaron began wrapping the meeting up, moving through issues related to decisions made last year, and almost forgetting general business.

coming back even after they’re successful.” A philosophy that is right in

PHOTOGRAPH: LOUISE HUTT

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LET’S SET THE AGENDA. STUDENTS' UNION PRESIDENT AARON LETCHER

— “And, yes, I confess to being the architect of both the student loans

known before - giving them a chance to succeed in an oh-so-egalitarian

would argue, was good policy—made less good by some later changes—

way. This was a game changer for tertiary education in New Zealand, but

the latter I was never happy with. It was so transparently unfair where

it didn’t go quite far enough.

students whose parents were unable to, shall we say, camouflage their

My parents always taught me that if something’s worth doing, it’s worth

incomes were pinged, and all were means-tested up to an age when young

doing right the first time. This is a proverb that could have served the

people simply are not dependent on their parents at all. We did it because

Minister of Tertiary Education well in his policy formulation. The fact that

of the fiscal position at the time, and in tertiary participation New Zealand

he recognized the blatant inequalities and proceeded anyway does not

was languishing at the bottom of the OECD. Although the schemes were

bode well for him, but at least he did something. It would be safe to say

not popular, they were part of a package that over 5 or 6 years took our

that despite their best efforts National fucked up, but before a chorus of

participation rate closer to the top. In other words, they did give many more

Labour Party activists chime in, I’d like to take this opportunity to remind

students an opportunity.”

them that they had 9 years of surpluses to fix these glaring inequalities

Quoted above are the departing words of Lockwood Smith, a 29 year vet-

but didn’t, choosing instead to awkwardly tinker around the edges like a

eran Member of Parliament, as he made his valedictory speech in 2013. As

12 year old boy at a school dance. But we’re not playing the blame game,

the self-confessed architect of the current Student Loan Scheme you may

because that game has no winners.

be interested to see he took the opportunity to take parting shots at the

Instead let’s play the solution game, where we make this a real election

policy that catapulted him and others to political superstardom and listed it

issue. The time has come for a universal student allowance. Let’s not get

as one of the great regrets of his career. When initially implemented, these

distracted by sideshows like loan defaulters being arrested at borders or

policies were undeniably revolutionary, pulling swarms of downtrodden,

minor cuts to student support.

uneducated and underprivileged young people up by their bootstraps and

setting them on a path to opportunity and prosperity that they had never

scheme and means-tested student allowances. Although the former, I

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PHOTOGRAPH: BROOK JAMES

nexus magazine

MINIMUM WAGE INCREASE TONY STEVENS FROM YWRC

— If you are living on the noodle-line I have some news that will make your week. Students earning the minimum wage will soon be able to afford an extra packet of Indomie’s famous Mi Goreng Instant noodles when the minimum wage increases 50c on April 1. Johnny and his buddies have decided to bump the minimum from $13.75 to $14.25. Such is their ‘generosity’ in an election year compared to their 25c increase in 2013. This also means the Starting Out Rate (1617 year-olds) and training wages will increase from $11 to $11.40, since they legally have to remain at eighty per cent of the adult minimum. Actually this will probably be old news by

NEW ADVOCATE! LAURENCE MCLEAN

—

the time you read this but I was surprised by how many students hadn’t heard about the

Hey there. I’m Laurence and I am the new advocate for the Waikato Students’ Union advo-

raise when I was busy heckling them during

cacy service. For those who don’t know me from my 4 years working in the Halls or 6 years

O’Week, considering the story broke mid

at Uni, I study law and management and this is my final semester here at Waikato. I have

February.

taken the job with the advocacy service to help you guys with any problems that you my face

So now you can spend even more time

during your study. As a hopeful lawyer I want to make sure that I have hands on experience

sprinkling five different kinds of seasoning over

representing people in a wide range of problems. I want to make sure they get the solutions

everybody’s favourite noodles and the kitchen

they want, that they feel supported throughout the process and hopefully along the way

bench. Handy tip: heat the oil sachet first by

show you that not all lawyers are here for the money (well not only for the money at least).

dipping it in the boiling noodles – it makes it a lot easier to pour out.

Coming to Uni can be a daunting experience and every now and then we all run into problems which we could do with a little help with. Whether you are a first year, returner, in your

If you can detect my thinly veiled sarcasm in

final year, or a postgraduate student we can help you. I’ve faced a lot of the problems that

this article then you belong at university with

often arise at Uni: StudyLink problems, university and academic snags, consumer issues, and

the rest of the brainiacs – good for you!

hardship in my personal life so I know how hard Uni life can be sometimes.

On a more serious note, if your employer is paying you less than the minimum seek advice

So come in and see me or Amber at the WSU office and let us know what we can help with to make sure that you can have the most rewarding and easiest time you can.

from the Young Workers Resource Centre. Contact: advocacy@wsu.org.nz or 027 2065 011. Contact: 0800 AT YWRC, ywrc@xtra.co.nz.

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NOTICES

Entreprenuer Workshop THURSDAY 20TH MARCH, 10AM - 1130AM @ SODA INC, CRNR VICTORIA AND BRIDGE ST, (OPPOSITE THE POLICE STATION)

MONDAY 24TH - FRIDAY 28TH MARCH

The advocacy service at the Waikato Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union (WSU) is a free and confidential service to help you get through the tougher times as a student. Keep an eye out for Advocacy Week happening next week. There will be workshops,

access a ton of job opportunities with Jasmine, during Cultural Hour 1pm - 2pm

Fancy A Ride? ADAM.WOLLLIN.IS@HOTMAIL.COM

Clothes Swaps and Swap a Can for BBQ at Level Zer Got a great idea for a business opportunity?

A Mountain Biking club is looking for new mem-

Want some expert start up advice? Need some

bers interested in getting together and riding.

networks to develop your idea? SODA Inc are

Please register your interest with Adam.

hosting an exclusive workshop introducing students to SODA's entrepreneurship pathways and its FREE! MUST register online here: http://www. sodainc.com/pages/page/soda-waikato-universityseminar/. WSU are supplying free bus passes to those who have registered, will drop you right outside the SODA Inc door. Please contact Khayt

Young Workers Resource Centre TUESDAY 18TH MARCH 1PM -2PM @ LEVEL ZERO

Board Gamers SATURDAY 5TH APRIL

on clubs@wsu.org.nz to collect this voucher. The Waikato University Boardgaming Club is Have any questions about what your boss can

Gardening Club

have you do at work? Losing hours that you are usually entitled to? Are you an International

mulching during cultural hour march 19th 1pm2pm, at the community garden by the SUB driveway.

waikatoboardgameclub@gmail.com

student trying to find work? Come and get some advice from Tony, 1pm -2pm.

WEDNESDAY 19TH MARCH

The Gardening Club has a working bee/planting/

hosting International Tabletop Day on April 5th on campus. To register your interest email Sam at

Student Job Search

Free Law Advice 11:00AM - 1:00PM

WEDNESDAY 19TH MARCH 1PM - 2PM @ LEVEL ZERO Every Thursday from 11am - 1pm at the Waikato

Advocacy Week 40

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Student's Union in SUB. Brought to you by the Need a job quickly? Having trouble finding work that suits your schedule? Need support learning how to apply for things? Find out how you can

WSU and Community Law Waikato. Supported by Law for Change. Email advocacy@wsu.org.nz for more information and booking.

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DO YOU TAKE PHOTOS AND CAN WE HAVE SOME?

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET INVOLVED EMAIL DESIGN@NEXUSMAG.CO.NZ.

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Codewords

Each letter in this puzzle is represented by a number 1-26. Crack the code to solve the crossword.

KenKen

Sequence

The bolded groups of squares are called “cages.” In the

What shape comes next?

upper-left corner of each cage, there is a “target number” and a math operation. Fill in each square of a cage with a number between 1-9. The numbers in a cage must combine—in any order, using only that cage’s math operation—to form that cage’s target number. You may not repeat a number in any row or column but you can repeat a number within a cage. Example: Your target number is 5, your operation is addition, you’re using the numbers 1–9, and the cage is made up of two squares. You could fill in 2 and 3 (because 2 + 3 = 5) or 1 and 4 (1 + 4 = 5)

Syllabic

1. Merry-go-round: 2. Modern:

From the following syllables and clues, form ten words of a least two syllables.

3. Tangible: 4. Seriousness:

ate - ban - ble - bri - car - cate - con - desh -

5. Formal statement:

di - e - ef - fec - gla - in - lu - o - ou - pa - pal - po - pu - rar - ras - res - sau - sel - so - tem - terne - tin - tion - tu - ty - y

6. To bring about: 7. Russian Monk: 8. Asian country: 9. Sweet white wine: 10. Point out:

Enter numbers into the blank spaces so that each row,

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HARD

MEDUIM

column and 3x3 box contains the numbers 1-9.

EASY

Sudoku

Draw your answer here.

nexus magazine

Target How many four (or more) letter words can you make from the letters in the square without using proper nouns? Each word must contain the centre letter.

9 letter words redirects 8 letter words decriers destrier directer discreet discrete reciters redirect 7 letter words credits deceits decrier decries deicers desirer dieters directs recited reciter recites reedits resider retired retires retried retries serried stirred strider tireder 6 letter words cerise ciders credit criers deceit deicer deices derris desire dicers dieter direct direst driers driest edicts eiders recite reedit reside retied reties retire ricers riders sirred sirree steric stride tierce tiered

Crossword

triers 5 letter words cedis

Solve the clues and fill in the words.

cider cited cites cried crier

Answers for this crossword are in the online magazine at nexusmag.co.nz.

cries deice deist dicer Across

41. Continent (4)

79. Methods (7)

14. Decree (5)

51. Duties (11)

dices diets direr drier dries

1. Musician (9)

43. Dapper (5)

80. Aromatic herb (7)

15. Mariners (7)

54. Frank (6)

edict edits eider recti resit

5. Clear of blame (7)

44. Disregard (6)

82. Give evidence in court

20. Male deer (4)

56. Wading bird (4)

retie riced ricer rices rider

9. Edges (7)

46. Previously (6)

(7)

21. Uncomplicated (6)

59. Talked (9)

rides riser rites sired siree

13. Polo sticks (7)

47. Greek epic poem (5)

83. Show (7)

23. Requiring the least

61. Dizziness (7)

sited tides tiers tired tires

16. Perils (7)

50. Woodwind instrument (4)

84. Spotted dog (9)

effort (7)

62. Watchful (8)

trice tried trier tries 4 letter

17. Deliberated (9)

52. Urban area (4)

25. Claws (6)

63. Business concern (4)

words cedi cist cite cits

18. Alimentary (10)

53. Overwhelming fear (5)

Down

27. Notion (4)

65. Mythical winged

dice dies diet dire dirt disc

19. Eerie (6)

55. Owned (9)

1. Third sign of the zodiac (6)

28. Court game (9)

horse(7)

edit eide iced ices ides ired

20. Type of bird (7)

57. Legal excuse (5)

2. Cove (5)

29. Mercy (8)

67. Stage whisper (5)

ires reis rice ride rids rise

22. Demolish (7)

58. Corrosive substance (4)

3. Rodent (3)

31. Compositions (6)

68. Stopped (6)

rite side sire site stir tics

24. Talented (6)

60. Large oval fruit (5)

4. Dullness (6)

33. Nimble (5)

69. Abut (6)

tide tied tier ties tire

26. Custom (9)

61. Green (7)

5. Female relative (4)

35. Concurs (6)

72. Display tripod (5)

30. Responses (7)

64. Consumption (9)

6. Slumber (5)

36. Nominee (9)

74. Omnivorous mammal(5)

32. Part of a jacket (5)

65. Pale (6)

7. Roped (7)

38. Dried grape (6)

75. Refuse to accept or

33. Tallies (4)

66. Cane syrup (7)

8. Coded (9)

40. Arachnid with a sting (8)

believe (4)

34. Banquet (5)

70. Time interval (7)

9. Implore (3)

42. Directly proportional (6)

77. Roman 3 (3)

37. Whirlpool (9)

71. Birds of prey (6)

10. Decompose (3)

45. Quick (5)

78. Grass used as fodder (3)

39. Boredom (5)

73. Recalled the past (10)

11. Fans (11)

48. Set up (7)

81. Distilled from fermented

40. Notice (4)

76. Does away with (9)

12. Askance (8)

49. Tooth coating (6)

molasses (3)

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