The contents of this zine include topics of sexual violence and abuse, sexual assault and rape.
Please proceed with care and caution.
The second issue of the Reclaim zine coincides with the second exhibition of Unveil the Unseen, adding to our existing archive of stories and creative works on the experiences of gender-based violence survivors. We learnt so much in the making of the first rendition, and its impact was beyond our expectations. We hope to reach wider audiences and help more survivors in this second edition and event, and we would like to extend our thanks to you, our audience, for your interest and support, to Survivor Sanctuary, whose help has made this project possible, and most importantly to our contributors, who continue to inspire us with their courage and resilience. Thank you for sharing your experience and letting us be a part of your journey. We stand by you.
She was shamed into silence, she very almost fell That was the plan, so that she didn’t tell
Make her feel so alone, make her feel like a freak, So she keeps your dirty secrets, too fearful to speak
ARE YOU LISTENING?
The world almost lost her, deep inside her own shell, Battling with “what’s right” yet going through hell
Don’t share your shame, they won’t take it well Keep it between us, be sure not to tell
ARE YOU LISTENING?
Your trauma is yours, be sure not to share Keep those truths hidden, don’t lay them bare
Abuse will continue, stealing the lives of our youth
Because they don’t want to hear it, and can’t handle the truth
ARE YOU LISTENING?
When will they listen, when will they hear?
Stand with survivors, together, face the fear
But now I am free, I am no longer weak, I found my voice and I will speak
REALLY ARE YOU
by Bee Malka
by Bee Malka
From shadows to light
In the quiet of my childhood, from the tender age of three, Shadows cast upon me, where innocence should be.
A world beyond my years, for a heart so pure and small, I learned to hide my voice, behind a silent wall.
Years rolled on, and I grew, but the shadows persisted still, Seen not as a person, but a vessel just for others' will.
My worth defined by others, in a world that couldn't see,
The strength within my spirit, the light I longed to be.
In my home, walls closed in, with lies and torture that stung,
A life of silent suffering, where no song of hope was sung.
Yet deep within my heart, a flicker of desire burned, For a whisper of a future, where my worth would be returned.
One night, the darkest shadow, took what wasn ' t his to take, Left me silently broken, shattered, in a world that seemed to quake.
After a while, from the depths of sorrow, a phoenix rose anew,
With wings of steel and fire, I started to soar above the blue. I found my voice and my power, in the echoes of my pain, Moving towards being a warrior in the rain.
My worth reflected, in the strength of my eyes,
A beacon for the broken, a light that never dies.
From shadows into sunlight, I began to walk a path so bright,
A testament to courage, to the endless fight for right.
My story is still being written, of a spirit unconfined, Of a girl who has started to find her worth, and attempt to left the past behind.
by
Bee Malka
by Grace Harris
by Bee Malka
by Bee Malka
It's time to, get out of my own head
T THESELINGS TO BED
Put these thoughts and feelings to bed
Sometimes it doesn't feel real
So surreal
Something I used to dream of as a kid
Breaking out of that cage
A new page
Of life
OWNHEAD NEWPAGE
Cooking myself a meal
In my own rented flat
No one calling my phone asking me where
I'm at
The freedom to choose
Making my own decisions whether I win or I lose
In command of my own life.
Staying in the shower too long
Or falling asleep in the bath
Eating at 1am
Getting myself my own pet cat
Not hearing the shouts and the screams
Interrupting my dreams
At night
freedo in command mY DREAMS NOT HAVING TO WALK ON GLASS F TIME
Not having to walk on glass
Constantly on edge
Waiting for the next attack
Tossing and turning in bed
Unable to sleep, scared and full of dread
All these sounds and scary images in your head
All the abuse, and harsh words that he screams and has said
See, sometimes he's triggered and all he sees is red
So many others would have left and fled
An atmosphere of tension and anxiety that's been bred
Will she survive this time, will you wake from slumber to find her dead"
Going over and over what was said
In my head
Lying in bed
Crying myself to sleep
Going into that dream, deeper, deep
A bird breaking out of a cage
Starting a new stage
Of life
Rom MY AD scary images in your head tensionand anxiety
Starting a new stage will sheSURVIVE
FORGETmy own OF LIFE
Cutting my own grass
Trying to forget the past
Not doing the dishes
Having chocolate for breakfast
Not making the bed or changing the sheets
Having the same song on repeat
When doing my own online grocery shop
O LONGER ED TO STRESS STOPTHE PAIN EASE RMYEAMS FAKE A SMILE
Thinking about how I no longer need to stress
Over what to say and who to please
Or Making a mess
Or being on my knees
Praying to God for a release
To take me early and to stop the pain
Begging him again and again
Tears rolling down my cheeks
Leaving streaks
But still he didn't listen
And still the shouts and the screams
Continued to,
Interrupt my dreams, at night.
And so they fight
For whatever and whoever they think is right
Long, long into the night, I lay awake
Until the sun comes up and all is bright
I try to fake
A smile and ignorance
Have cereal for breakfast
And daydream, make it seem
Like I'm unaffected
MEDIOCRE MOMENTS E HOPE WNING
I'll hold on to these dreams
These mediocre moments of hope
Because when I'm drowning
Or feel like I'm at The end of my rope
It's dreaming of moments like
E RESTING MY POUNDING HE i DREAM SLEEP MY OWN REALITY MYOWN SANCTUA DR NO LONGER i’m NO LONG AFRAID OF WH
Getting home at 6 am in the morning and watching the sun rise
Or Sleeping with 5 different guys
Or picking my own movie, or even watching 2 or 3.
Finally sleeping in my own bed
Resting my pounding head
No longer filled with dread
No big egos to be fed
I sleep and I dream, and I dream and I sleep. And I live what I dream and make my dreams into my own reality.
I'm no longer afraid of what I'll see.
I've turned my nightmares into dreams
Even though it may seem
Pretty ordinary
I've created my own sanctuary
Away from all the hypocrisy
I'm no longer afraid of what I'll see.
by Bee Malka
by Bee Malka
Breaking the Silence
by Helen Russell
“How lucky you are”, She said convincingly.
“Their lives are so sad But you have a home.”
“Someone to love you, Somewhere to stay.”
So why did I ache As I watched those poor children?
Why did I identify my gaping hole Of emptiness with theirs?
Why did I learn that number With its catchy tune?
A confused unknowing That something was wrong.
A yearning to experience Something different to unsafeness.
Not knowing how that might feel In those faraway lands
Not even knowing if safe care Existed where those Distant Adults lived
Vaguely wondering, floating…questioning Whether I could escape the island,
Swim through treacherous waters
To reach someone to Trust?
To untangle myself from her clutches, To collapse helplessly at their feet?
I succeed but am tongue-tied and trembling; Terrified that she will re-capture me:
Not knowing but ashamed… Numb but pained…
Lost but hoping for protection From a Real Person.
Blushing, tormented, desperate. Writhing in pain and
Struggling to speak Those putrid words.
I vomit them untidily Before an unsafe audience,
Relying on the one concerned face Of my first Reliable Adult;
The only hook onto which I dare to hang my voice
And break my lifelong silence.
by Bee Malka
About us
Unveil the Unseen is a Media and Creative Industries transmedia project at the University of Warwick. Our mission is to raise awareness about abuse and violence and uplift survivor voices, giving them a platform to safely and creatively express themselves through a series of documentaries, an exhibition and this zine.
@mci.unveiltheunseen
About Survivor Sanctuary
Survivor Sanctuary Coventry is a locally based organisation doing meaningful work to support victim-survivors of sexual violence. We are incredibly grateful to have had the chance to collaborate with them in this project.
