Northern Express - March 21, 2022

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NORTHERN

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NORTHERN MICHIGAN’S WEEKLY • march 21 - march 27, 2022 • Vol. 32 No. 12 Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 1


HAPPY EVER AFTER Whether you want to be very hands-on or want everything taken care of for you, our events team will be sure you have the wedding of your dreams.

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2 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly


letters

Is a New House in Your Future?

Bud Cline | Traverse City

Ron Tschudy | Echo Township

To Our President To President Biden, Help Ukraine now. What is the world’s red line here? If not the schools, children’s hospital, maternity hospital, the civilians, then what? For goodness sake, Putin will not negotiate. Ukraine is not going to give their people and country over to Russia. This will never end, and in the meantime, they endure the loss of life and the loss of all their properties. Likely something will hit one of their nuclear power plants or Chernobyl. We must help protect what is left of Ukraine or there will be nothing left and no one alive. NATO and allies must do everything now to help prevent any further invasion and get the Russian army out. Please, please stop Putin. He will not be the one to stop so we must stop him. I wish I could go and help the Ukrainians fight in Ukraine myself! Enough is enough. Protect Ukraine: there is no other option. It is being destroyed beyond belief. Do not let this go on. Putin has no rights there and he will not stop. We must go into Ukraine with everything we’ve got: fighter jets, military, and all. NATO/U.S. must wake up.

Fair, Honest Elections In the 2020 national elections, something very strange took place. Across the country, fair and honest elections were held state by state. The systems for providing the citizens to vote took place, and there was little fraud. It was one of the cleanest and most honest elections we have had. Our secretary of state, Joycelyn Benson, and those who shared her responsibilities, made sure of that. She has been seen as a leader for fair and safe elections. She has written the first book on the role of the secretary of state in enforcing election and campaign finance laws. She faced a challenge in the lies and disinformation that came following the 2020 election. Michigan, along with a few other states, proposed new regulations to make a fair and trusted election process more fair. In fact, it has been a political effort by some to make elections less fair and less accessible to minority voters. Benson has stood fast against these efforts. Michigan elections in 2020 under her leadership became the most fair and accessible in the state’s history. Unfortunately, the lies persist, as a forceful minority of the Republican Party believes that Biden stole the election from Trump. We are fortunate to have Jocelyn Benson to be a protector of our voting rights, and we can count on her leadership to provide a safe 2022 election.

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Berta Meserve | Lake Ann Sorries The Advice Goddess has been repeatedly ragging on guys about not apologizing as often as women. I’ll try (idiosyncratically, of

Bob McQuilkin | Frankfort

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Groundhog Day Every day is like that Groundhog Day movie. Donald Trump wakes up and announces to the world that the 2020 election was stolen. Republican candidates visit him on bended knee to request his endorsement in exchange for a promise to repeat the Big Lie. Just because Traverse City voted 65 percent for Joe Biden doesn’t mean that Traverse City was stolen. Just because Biden won Garfield and Peninsula Townships doesn’t mean they were stolen. Just because Republican Congressman Jack Bergman got 2,266 more votes in Grand Traverse County than Donald Trump doesn’t mean that a team of RINOs were sitting in the basement at the Governmental Center with a box of ballots applying White Out on Donald Trump’s votes while leaving the Bergman votes untouched. Just because Joe Biden won Leelanau County with 52 percent of the votes doesn’t mean that it was stolen. Biden won the townships of Cleveland, Empire, Glen Arbor, Leelanau (Northport), Leland, and Suttons Bay. Since Leelanau County was organized in 1863, no Republican presidential candidate has won Michigan without winning Leelanau County. As the next election approaches and the Reagan Republicans (RINOs) are purged from the party, can we trust any candidate who repeats Trump’s Big Lie?

course) to even the score a bit here, though I’m sorry it took a while. I’m sorry that when I came of age in the ’50s I was, like many white male Americans then (and now), only patchily aware of our systemic mistreatment of “others.” I didn’t know, for example, that my parents (and all other prospective homeowners in our burgeoning suburb) had to sign a racially restrictive covenant in order to buy our house. Not until the early ’60s did the town begin to offer fair and equal homeownership opportunities. And I’m sorry for the nastinesses big and small that human beings sometimes inflict on other human beings in their (our) drive to achieve intimacy, togetherness, happiness, security, etc. It often works out well, though, eh? I’m also sorry that I feel intimidated when I see a bunch of guys with military weapons at a political demonstration, even though I’m pretty sure they won’t open fire, that maybe even they’re sorry they have to intimidatingly brandish those weapons in order for us to understand how strongly they feel about their freedom. When I’m on the road, sometimes I feel sorry that my bumper sticker says “SORRY FOR DRIVING SO CLOSE IN FRONT OF YOU”—because sometimes people then drive even closer. (Maybe they’re just trying to read it better.) I’m really sorry some folks took some bad advice and decided their personal choice (to not get vaccinated, wear a mask, etc.) outweighed the unhealthy consequences (including death) for themselves and everyone nearby and elsewhere, now and forever. Finally, sorry this was kind of a mixed bag, and sorry I used so many parentheses. (That’s eight sorries.)

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columns & stuff Top Ten........................................................4

Spectator/Stephen Tuttle...............................6 Opinion.........................................................8 Weird............................................................8 Dates........................................................16 Nitelife..........................................................19 Film..........................................................18 Crossword.................................................20 Advice......................................................20 Astrology...................................................21 Classifieds................................................23 Ph 231-459-4259 www.boppispizza.com eat pizza. be happy.

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Northern Express Weekly is published by Eyes Only Media, LLC. Publisher: Luke Haase PO Box 4020 Traverse City, Michigan 49685 Phone: (231) 947-8787 Fax: 947-2425 email: info@northernexpress.com www.northernexpress.com Editor: Jillian Manning Senior Writer: Lynda Twardowski Wheatley Finance & Distribution Manager: Brian Crouch Sales: Kathleen Johnson, Lisa Gillespie, Kaitlyn Nance, Michele Young, Randy Sills, Todd Norris, Jill Hayes For ad sales in Petoskey, Harbor Springs, Boyne & Charlevoix, call (231) 838-6948 Creative Director: Kyra Poehlman Distribution: Joe Evancho, Sarah Rodery Roger Racine, Gary Twardowski Charlie Brookfield, Randy Sills

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Contributors: Emily Burke, Brighid Driscoll, Anna Faller, Al Parker, Stephen Tuttle, Meg Weichman, Lynda Twardowski Wheatley Copyright 2022, all rights reserved. Distribution: 36,000 copies at 600+ locations weekly. Northern Express Weekly is free of charge, but no person may take more than one copy of each weekly issue without written permission of Northern Express Weekly. Reproduction of all content without permission of the publisher is prohibited.

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Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 3


this week’s

top ten Buy Pierogi, Support Ukrainian Families

VH1 Gem Todd Snider to Play COH A confirmed picker, grinner, and lover of “tellin’ stories,” musician Todd Snider is bringing his Takin’ Requests Tour to the City Opera House stage in Traverse City on March 25. Snider, who has toured with Emmylou Harris, Jimmy Buffett, and John Prine (an artist who works in a similar musical/political vein), has 20 albums under his guitar strap, each encompassing his seasoned folk, rock, funk, blues, and alt-country sound. For this live listening experience, Traverse City audiences will get the chance to explore even more: Snider’s bringing along Aaron Lee Tasjan—a genre-bending scion of interstellar pop, vintage glam, and psychedelic rock ’n’ roll—to open. Tickets start at $15 for students, $25/$30 for general audience. Doors open at 7pm; show starts at 8pm. For tickets, call (231) 941-8082 or visit cityoperahouse.org.

Choose from 40 varieties of pierogi from Lost Village Pierogi of Petoskey’s pop-up Presale Pierogi Drive on Sunday, March 27, from 12-3pm at Cherryland Center Mall in Traverse City. Ten percent of all proceeds will be used to support displaced Ukrainian families who have fled their homes and have sought refuge in Poland. Presales must be submitted by Wednesday, March 23, by 6pm. Pick-up times and slots are limited and are available on a first order basis. To order, visit lostvillagepierogi.com.

4

Hey, Read It! How to Be Happy: Not a Self-Help Book. Seriously

This isn’t a self-help book. At least, that’s the warning author and artist Iain S. Thomas attaches to his 2015 title, How to Be Happy: Not a Self-Help Book. Seriously. Framed in the context of his struggle to produce the writing he promised his publisher, this satirical, though often serious release combines Thomas’s esteemed poetry with short stories and new media—as well as some pages of actual prose—in a refreshingly honest take on the relentlessness of being alive. As for a one-size-fits-all satisfaction formula? Thomas is still working on that. His slim selection does, however, offer a salve for the sting of uncertainty, and if we haven’t hit “happiness” by the end of the book, at least we know we’re not alone.

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Entertainment! your

2

tastemaker Scovie’s Bordeaux Panini

Scovie’s Gourmet in Charlevoix has one of northern Michigan’s most mouthwatering lunch menus. With more than 40 options between their salads, burgers, wraps, paninis, and deli sandwiches, you could eat something new every day for the rest of March and all of April. But, if you’re going to try just one dish, we recommend going with the Bordeaux. This deceptively simple sandwich—turkey, brie, and caramelized red wine onions—is crisped to perfection, transporting you to a French café with the first bite. The brie is warm and perfectly creamy, and the onions add just the right amount of tangy snap in contrast. Trust us—this is a recipe you’re going to memorize and make at home again and again (though you never can beat the real thing). Ordering the full sandwich ($9.75) is well worth it, though you can’t go wrong with a half-sandwich, half-soup-du-jour combo ($10). Enjoy yours at 111 Bridge Street, Charlevoix. scovies.com.

4 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

for

21/22

todd snider

with special guest aaron lee tasjan

March 25 | 8 pM a storyteller who works a similar creative soil to john prine and shel silverstein, snider’s best songs are both sad and funny, political and entertaining, and always written with a poet’s eye and a stand-up comedian’s sensibility about the follies of human condition.

cityoperahouse.org

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6

Brews on the Farm

Raise a glass on Monday, March 21, at Farm Club’s Beer Gathering. This relaxed evening at the Leelanau County restaurant will feature brewing tips and beer storytelling from Farm Club brewer Corey Valdez alongside four beer tastings and a sampling of food. Attendees will get to know the beer-making process through Valdez’s eyes, as well as learn more about how to make an excellent craft beverage. (Valdez has a background in organic chemistry, so we have our fingers crossed that a bit of hoppy mad science will be in the cards.) It’s a perfect event for beer fans and home brewers alike. The Beer Gathering runs from 5:30 to 7:30pm and is being hosted as a special event as the restaurant is closed on Mondays. Tickets are $35 and are available at farmclubtc.com/events-2. (Note: masks will be required for attendees.)

Stuff We Love: Embracing the Art of Helping People in Need You might not know Chef Jose Andres or the nonprofit he founded, the World Central Kitchen. But right now, he and his teams are at several sites along the Ukrainian border, serving hot meals to hungry refugees and delivering flour to bakeries in Kyiv. Joanne Condino of Three Pines Studio in Cross Village is supporting WCK’s work by dedicating two of the studio’s most sought-after monthly subscription club offerings— Kim Cerrudo’s fairies and Condino’s own printed tea towels—to the beleaguered country and devoting half the proceeds of each sold to WCK. The limited-edition Peace for Ukraine Fairy ($30) features hand-beaded sunflowers inspired by Ukrainian Artist Marina Ilnytska. Condino’s linen tea towels feature wood-blocked patterns of wheat (which is represented by the golden yellow of the Ukrainian flag) or sunflowers, the official flower of Ukraine. More than 750 tea towels ($30 each) have shipped to nearly every state in the nation, and Condon herself had a set delivered to Washington, D.C., last week. The recipient: H.E. Oksana Markova, ambassador of Ukraine. Learn more at threepinesstudio.com.

Gaylord’s Saturn Booksellers Announces Closure Saturn Booksellers of Gaylord announced Wednesday that the bookshop will close its doors in April. Owner Jill Miner had hoped to find a buyer for the store but instead had to make the difficult decision to end the store’s 29-year run before the lease renewal at the end of next month. In a Facebook announcement to patrons, she noted that health concerns were impacting her work, and though closing will be a “bittersweet process,” she has “met the most incredible, intelligent and interesting people, made wonderful friends, worked with the best staff anyone could hope to employ and have more great memories than I can count.” As the store winds down over the next few weeks, books for babies, children, and young adults (as well as all non-book items) are 25 percent off, and an array of décor—from shelving to tables to fixtures—will be for sale. Orders can be placed and more information can be found by calling (989) 732-8899, visiting saturnbooksellers.com, or stopping in the store at 127 W. Main St., Gaylord.

8 bottoms up Blustone Vineyards’ Artisan Series For the rock hunters among us, Michigan is the mother lode, and finding an elusive Leland Blue is the jackpot. That same sense of unexpected discovery is at the heart of how Blustone Vineyards in Lake Leelanau approaches its product. Situated along 40 acres of pristine Leelanau soil—and named for the area’s signature stone—Blustone has spent the last decade creating old-world style wine from Northern Michigan fruit. But the real cream of the locally-sourced crop is a pair of pours known as the “Artisan Series.” A fire-andice duo of red and white wine, guests can indulge in the bodacious Winemaker’s Red— that’s a flagship fusion of Merlot, Syrah, and Cabernet Franc—or the fruity complexity of the Latitude white, which blends Pinot Blanc, Sauvignon Blanc, and Gruner Veltliner. And if you’re struggling to choose? We recommend a bottle of both. 780 N Sylt Rd, Lake Leelanau or blustonevineyards.com

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 5


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The National Alliance on Mental Health compiles and curates data from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (which is a branch of the U.S. Health and Human Services Department), the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), and the Department of Justice (DOJ). The numbers are depressing.

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It’s popular these days to suggest at least a partial solution involves sending out social workers or mental health workers on 911 and other calls not involving violence instead of uniformed law enforcement personnel. There is some evidence such an approach can be effective in some circumstances and can deescalate some situations. For example, Denver’s efforts to send a clinician and mental

Now, instead of warehousing people in mental hospitals, we warehouse them in jails, homeless shelters, and cemeteries.

suicidal thoughts. Perhaps more troubling, nearly 54 percent reported they neither sought nor received treatment of any kind.

health professional to some emergency calls have reduced their police responses by about three percent. (USA Today, February 6, 2021)

Mental Health America (mhanational.org), which uses publicly available data from all 50 states, reports equally distressing numbers, including that 15 percent of our children under 18 reported experiencing major depressive issues. Nearly 11 percent of those children can be categorized as severely depressed, yet 60 percent of that group receive no treatment.

Traverse City would like to try something similar. It would be a gift to law enforcement officers who are not thrilled about responding to attempted suicides or other calls involving mental health episodes absent of criminal activity. The real question is what happens after that initial contact is made.

As one might have guessed, the pandemic did not help at all. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation Health Tracking Poll, the last two years have seen significant increases in reported anxiety, depressive episodes, and diagnosed depression.

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According to the Prison Policy Institute, 37 percent of those in state or federal prisons have been diagnosed with mental illness and 66 percent of them receive no treatment. It even gets worse as 44 percent of those in local jails have been similarly diagnosed.

When Governor John Engler closed Michigan’s 16 mental health state hospitals in 1997, the idea was that most patients could be mainstreamed into society and have their needs met by the creation of many community mental health programs filled with qualified professionals. Warehousing patients in large institutions had lost favor as early as the 1970s as revelations of horrendous abuse at some began to surface. Even those more progressive facilities—including those using the Kirkbride Plan like the Traverse City State Hospital which emphasized humane treatment, rehabilitation, and patient self-sufficiency—were tarred with the same negative brush and forced to close. Unfortunately, the widespread community services promised were never fully budgeted by Congress or legislatures that saw little political advantage in helping the mentally ill. The promised community outreach and treatment never came to full fruition. The result is an alarming lack of available mental health services and a crushingly overburdened system trying to fill gaping holes in the safety net. Now, instead of warehousing people in mental hospitals, we warehouse them in jails, homeless shelters, and cemeteries.

To be truly effective, the response would require a fairly long list of support services and personnel. Avoiding interaction with the police might be a good starting point if we retrain 911 operators to identify mental health calls, but it does little to resolve the long-term issues. Where does that troubled and possibly struggling person now go for help? They can be forced into a 24-hour psychiatric hold at the hospital during which they can be observed and evaluated but must then be released. They can be referred to counseling or other services but can’t be forced to go. They can be prescribed appropriate medications but can’t be forced to take them. Even the worst of cases involving the most deeply troubled of our neighbors cannot be quickly or easily resolved. Michigan now has only five psychiatric hospitals with only 722 total beds, all of which are always filled. Waiting lists for these patients can be disastrous. We’ve never had the will to fully address this problem so it continues to fester. We need a financial commitment that dramatically increases the number of mental health workers and available facilities, provides the resources to identify and evaluate those who need help, puts a system in place that provides assistance quickly and efficiently, and then tracks patients who need follow-up treatment and services. Continuing to use jails, homeless shelters, and cemeteries as first options is an abdication of our responsibility as a society. We can do better. We must do better.


BRINGING THE U.P. CLOSER TO HOME

Author Ellen Airgood talks Lake Superior, rural poverty, and the art of a good story By Anna Faller For award-winning author Ellen Airgood, writing often feels like fate. “I think I’ve always been a writer at some level,” she tells Northern Express. The realization first hit her at age 10, when, with the help of her mother’s trusty typewriter, she punched out a series of three short poems. “They had come into my head out of nowhere,” she says, “and they insisted on getting out. It was fun—interesting and exciting.” From then on, Airgood was hooked. Fast forward several decades and four fulllength books later, and the hook has only deepened its hold. Airgood, however, is first to admit that the allure of being an author is often misleading. “Writing has almost never been easy or inspired since,” she says. “But I remained dogged in my pursuit of the craft and career. It was—and is—a long, slow process.” Finding True North A graduate of the University of Michigan’s School of Natural Resources and Environment, Airgood’s earliest career pursuits were in environmental science. That is, until fate’s hand intervened in the form of a camping trip to the U.P. It was there that Airgood fell in love, both with the region’s endless bounty and with the line cook who made her lunch. Airgood has since married that young sandwich chef, and the main street café where they met—Grand Marais’ West Bay Diner and Delicatessen—has been her home for more than two decades. But even though her career shifted toward the hospitality business, Airgood wasn’t about to put her pen down. “As much as I grew to love the restaurant, I also wanted something apart from it,

something purely my own,” she explains. That “something,” of course, was writing stories. “I felt so convinced it was my vocation,” Airgood adds. “I wanted someone, somewhere to read what I wrote, and hopefully be moved by it.” Writing, however, can be lonely business, and for Airgood, there’s respite in both of her roles. “At times, writing has been a refuge from the demands of my other work,” she says, “and sometimes— often—the diner has been a refuge from writing.” For her, the diner also serves as an endless font for novel fodder. The conversations of patrons have helped Airgood hone her dialogue skills, and being around people day in and day out has given her the chance to see the complexity and nuance of humanity. For the fictional personas Airgood conjures, complex is an understatement. Her approach to character craft— both for readers, and for herself—feels more akin to meeting a person than a few invented lines on a page. “No matter what I’m working on, I strive to disappear into the characters and hear their stories from whatever scrap of rock they’re standing on,” she says. Writing What’s Real In the case of her newest novel, Tin Camp Road, that “rock” is Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, which, much like the story it surrounds, is a dramatic, beautiful place, full of strong characters. Featuring the protagonist pair of Laurel Hill, a single mom, and her whip-smart daughter Skye, the novel

follows in their plight to preserve their independence—and the life they’ve fought so hard to build—under rural poverty’s harrowing hand. The bones of the plot may sound familiar to many of us in northern Michigan: Laurel and Skye adore their home on Lake Superior, but their landlord decides to evict them to make way for a summer vacation rental. Do Laurel and Skye leave in search of better opportunities in a bigger city? Or do they fight for the lives they’ve built in the place they love? “[The book] came to be slowly, with many stops and starts,” Airgood says, “but Laurel and Skye captured my heart, and I felt determined to give them a life outside of my own head.” That life is largely an amalgamation of people who have crossed through Airgood’s own world. But, in the case of this particular novel, she found herself inspired by challenge, specifically, the financial challenge that often accompanies single-parenthood. “I’ve spent a lot of time pondering what a worthy undertaking it is to raise a child, and I’ve seen how that challenge can multiply for a single parent or one with limited financial resources.” It’s this very readership that Airgood hopes her words might reach. “I saw that some people knew this well, and I hoped that [readers] might take heart from a story like Tin Camp Road and feel validated,” she says. As for those on the opposite side of the coin, Airgood aims to cultivate empathy. “I

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MELTZER! Ellen Airgood isn’t the only author with Michigan ties coming this way in the next few weeks: On Thursday, April 7, beginning at 7pm, Brad Meltzer is taking the National Writers Series stage for a virtual discussion of his newest Zig & Nola thriller, The Lightning Rod. The critically-acclaimed author maintains that ordinary people change the world, though Meltzer himself is far more than ordinary. A graduate of the University of Michigan and Columbia Law

hoped [the book] might open a window gently on another way of life, a way of life with dignity, heart, and worth.” No matter who picks up the book or where they are—above the bridge, below, or in another state—Airgood hopes her readers walk away having learned something new. “A good story presents a human quandary with high stakes and lets a reader experience the journey,” she says. “As a writer, I’m always interested in how my story might help this beleaguered world, even if that help is simply asking questions.” About the Event: Award-winning author Ellen Airgood joins the National Writers Series for an in-person event on Thursday, March 24, beginning at 7pm at the City Opera House. The evening’s guest host, writer and educator Susan Odgers, is something of a local celebrity. A Detroit native, she is a regular contributor to the Record-Eagle, where she’s written the monthly column, “Adapted in TC” since 2008. Odgers’ writing has also appeared in such local and national publications as NMC Magazine, Today’s Education, and Glamour. In addition to her journalistic pursuits, Odgers has taught psychology at NMC since 1989. She is a member of the Traverse City Human Rights Commission, as well as the National Society for Newspaper Columnists; and in 2021, Odgers was recognized as one of the year’s Influential Women in Northern Michigan. She is currently working on a compilation of her Record-Eagle columns. The Airgood-Odgers event also features a virtual livestream option. Virtual tickets are $10.50, and in-person tickets range from $5-$25. For more information, ticket sales, and registration, please visit nationalwritersseries.org.

School, Meltzer’s countless New York Times-listed thrillers include The Inner Circle and The Book of Fate. In addition to his fiction, Meltzer is also an accomplished author of nonfiction (The First Conspiracy), advice, children’s books, and even comics, for which he won the esteemed Eisner Award. He is the host of Brad Meltzer’s History and Brad Meltzer’s Decoded on the History Channel, and is a co-creator of the WB drama Jack and Bobby. Virtual tickets are $10.50 and can be purchased through the National Writers Series website at nationalwritersseries.org.

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 7


DIPLOMATIC DREAMS OF RUSSIA Ooohhh-kkkaaayyyyy Some romantic relationships are full of drama and strife, so maybe Sandra, 28, of Budapest, Hungary, has come up with a better model. According to Oddity Central, Sandra has fallen for Luffancs, a plastic model of an airplane. After breaking up with her latest human boyfriend in January, Sandra bought Luffancs for $660 and fell madly in love. “I don’t know why I love him, I just love him,” she said. Sandra works in the aviation industry and is around airplanes every day, but says she will never cheat on Luffancs. In fact, she doesn’t know if she’ll ever date another human being. “Planes are more reliable as partners,” she said. Unclear on the Concept When Bshar Ahmed, 30, of Youngstown, Ohio, was arrested on March 7, he told police that he was selling marijuana from the gas station where he was working the midnight shift because he just got out of prison and he needs the money, WKBN-TV reported. The owner of the station called officers about Ahmed and produced a bag, which Ahmed admitted was his, that contained bags of weed and a loaded .38-caliber semiautomatic handgun, along with suspected methamphetamine, crack cocaine, indeterminate pills and over $1,000 in cash. Ahmed’s previous convictions bar him from possessing a firearm. The Neighbors When ya gotta go ... At 4:40 p.m. on March 4, Kenneth Clark Carlyle, 64, walked up his neighbor’s driveway in his birthday suit and relieved himself, No. 2 style, on the neighbor’s glass patio table, The Smoking Gun reported. The whole thing was caught on not one, but two “separate angles of the victim’s home security video footage,” the police report noted. Clearwater, Florida, officers arrived at Carlyle’s RV camper, where they spoke to him “through the door ... and he was still visibly naked and highly uncooperative.” The bond on this incident is $250, but he was already in trouble from a December infraction, so he remains in the pokey. Unexpected Trip Three Michigan men ice fishing in a homemade shanty on Saginaw Bay on March 6 went for the ride of their lives as winds nearing 50 mph pushed their structure about a mile across the ice, the Associated Press reported. The men had spent the night before in the shanty and were aware that a storm was approaching, but thought they could ride it out. But the next morning, someone onshore saw one of them struggling with the hut as it scooted over the ice. It eventually ended up about 1.5 miles offshore before deputies arrived; the men were able to return to shore without rescue equipment and were unharmed. Surprise! As construction crews worked to remodel the Henry J. Kaiser Convention Center in Oakland, California, on March 9, they made an alarming discovery, NBC News reported. The building, which has been out of use since 2005, was the final

resting place for “an unidentified, decayed body,” said Lt. Ray Kelly of the Alameda County Sheriff ’s Office. “We found remains best described as mummified,” he said. “The conditions in the walls were such that the body was preserved in good condition.” He said authorities will obtain fingerprints to try to identify the deceased. “Any theory is possible,” Kelly said, “... from someone who got in behind the wall and became trapped ... to someone put the person there.” It’s a Head-Scratcher On March 3 in a quiet Denver neighborhood, someone broke into a box truck parked along a street and stole a box marked “Science Care,” KDVR-TV reported. Inside the box were a number of human heads that were being transported for use in medical research. The thieves also stole a dolly. Isaac Fields, who lives nearby, was perplexed: Why was the truck parked in his neighborhood? Where was the driver? Why would someone steal human remains? Police wouldn’t provide many details because the case is still open. Creepy Yes, this item is about clowns. Or at least circuses. Or circus train cars. In Nash County, North Carolina, nine railroad cars from the 1960s Barnum & Bailey circus that had been abandoned in the woods caught fire on March 10, WRAL-TV reported. The cars were just outside the city limits of Spring Hope, where they were stored after the North Carolina Department of Transportation bought them in 2017, hoping to refurbish them for passenger service. Later they were put up for auction, but more recently the cars were a popular destination for urban explorers and people seeking shelter. At least four of the cars appeared to be badly damaged by the fire; the cause of the blaze is under investigation. People With Issues Prosecutors have accused 20-year-old Mauricio Damian Guerrero of Bensalem, Pennsylvania, of burglary after he traveled to Somersworth, New Hampshire, and hid in the attic of a woman he had met on the website OnlyFans, WKBN-TV reported on March 7. Guerrero allegedly descended from the attic to take video of the woman while she was sleeping, stole some of her underwear, and planned to place a tracking device on her car. Police were called after someone at the home heard a noise; Guerrero was found on the roof of the home. He was released on bail and ordered to wear a tracking device. Ewwwww U.S. Customs and Border Protections agents probably rarely having a boring day, but between Feb. 19 and 25, officers in Philadelphia came across some particularly skin-crawly cargo: about 300 leeches from Bulgaria, NBC New York reported. The medicinal leeches, which arrived in jars distributed among six separate air cargo shipments, were headed for Connecticut, Florida and Illinois, but they’ll never make it: That type of leech, the Hirudo medicinalis, is a protected species and can’t be traded internationally. Instead, they were turned over to federal wildlife agents.

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guest opinion by Isiah Smith, Jr. Russia’s unprovoked aggression in Ukraine has the West, and the rest of the world, scrambling to understand Putin’s motives and motivations. Churchill’s description of Russia rings as accurate today as it did in 1939, when he said, “Russia is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma.” The late humorist P.J. O’Rourke may well have been thinking of Russia when he wrote, “Jesus said to love your enemies; he didn’t say we shouldn’t have any.” We may have finally reached the belated point in our geopolitical life where we can no longer deny that Russia is, and perhaps always will be, America’s enemy. This might change after Putin leaves the world; presently, however, we delude ourselves if we think otherwise. Suppose America, and the rest of the “free world,” move our governments forward and remain free and prosperous. In that case, we must ignore the ignorant bloviations emanating from the extreme right wing of the political spectrum about the monomaniacal Soviet Strongman’s imaginary “strength and brilliance.” Such uninformed childlike chatter is as wrong as it is dangerous, which is to say, very. As a recent Foreign Affairs magazine essay noted, successive U.S. presidents have entered office believing that, unlike their predecessors, they alone understood Putin. They alone held the key to opening Russia. It would only be a matter of time before they waved their magic wand across the globe and tamed the Russian bear. And each time, the results played out as they always have, with broken promises and tattered treaties and steady escalation of tensions between the two nuclear powers. George W. Bush in 2001 looked into Putin’s eyes and, instead of seeing two black holes, thought he saw a soul. Bush claimed, “I found him to be very straightforward and trustworthy.” Early in his presidency, Barack Obama believed he could stop a “dangerous drift” and reset relations with Russia. The less said about the dark comedy following the 2016 U.S. election the better. Going back even further, even Reagan’s pithy “trust but verify” approach to the Soviet Union seems, in retrospect, quaint and ill-informed. Trust? Really? It turns out only Mitt Romney got it right when he said in 2012, “Russia, this is, without question, our number one geopolitical foe. They fight every cause for the world’s worst actors.” It brings to mind my 13-year-old daughter’s comment upon hearing self-styled “black conservatives” excoriate civil rights leaders: “Daddy, they’re just not like us.” Putin has shown little interest in forging a mutually productive relationship with the West, unless it is on terms of his choosing. And now, in Ukraine, his ultimate objectives

are incontrovertibly clear: He wants nothing more than to practice repression at home and aggression against countries that he still considers part of “Mother Russia.” He’s a man stuck in the inglorious past of his imagination. After all of America’s efforts at diplomacy, Russia has remained an inscrutable and menacing nation that plays by its own rules, rules that not only disadvantage other countries, but its own as well. The West must jettison its romantic, misguided notion that customary diplomatic norms are ever in play in dealing with Putin. See him as he is: a tyrant who ruthlessly murders opponents at home, attempts wars of conquest around the world (which almost always fail), and has no real interest in Western-style diplomacy. As long as Putin rules Russia, we will have to deal with him as an adversary. The United States must cease the practice of doing the same things repeatedly and expecting different results each time. That, according to Albert Einstein, is the way of insanity. Everything I have said here paints a dark and dangerous portrait of the future of the world’s engagement with Russia under Putin. If diplomatic efforts are insufficient to move Putin, what is the solution? In the February 23, 2022, issue of Foreign Affairs, Alina Polyakova and Daniel Fried offered this reasonable solution: “The United States and its allies should first aim to craft a long-term policy toward Russia that is clear-eyed about Putin’s aspirations. To do so, they must look closely at the lessons learned since the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991.” Too often, it seems to me, American presidents have treated the “Russian issue” as an issue of first impression. Every four (or eight) years we start anew, without regard to the lessons of the past, and a new Russia policy emerges. Unfortunately, this leads to the formulation of short-term solutions to address long-term problems. Former National Security Adviser Zbigniew Brzezinski understood this problem intuitively. When the Soviet Union dissolved in 1991, he warned the triumphant West that although “the Cold War did end in the victory of one side and in the defeat of the other,” the decisive outcome did not guarantee a smooth aftermath. Defeat had proved “politically unsettling” in Moscow and turned the wider region into “a geopolitical vacuum.” And as we know, nature abhors a vacuum. Right up to the moment Putin ordered the invasion of Ukraine, most Russian “experts” were surprised. They shouldn’t have been. They should have seen it coming. Isiah Smith, Jr. is a retired government attorney.


Sugar on Tap How to Make Your Own Maple Syrup

By Emily Burke There is no sweeter reward for making it through the long, dark NoMi winters than the scent of maple sap boiling away on its way to becoming maple syrup. Equal parts art and science, the whole sap-to-syrup process may seem complicated. “Many people are afraid to produce syrup because it looks intimidating,” says Interpreter Keith Knecht of the Cheboygan-based Native Ways Traditional Arts. However, with a little know-how and patience, this time-honored northern tradition is easily one of the best ways to beat any lingering winter blues and welcome spring, all while bringing home an enviable haul. Why the Sap Runs The magic happens during the transition from winter to spring when the nighttime temperature falls below freezing and the daytime temperature warms to above freezing. Due to a physiological quirk in maples (and a few other species like black walnuts) the freezing and thawing cycle causes gas bubbles to form in the sap. These gas bubbles expand with warmer temperatures in the day, creating a positive pressure gradient that causes sap to move from the roots to the canopy, where buds use the energy to finish their development in time for blooming and leaf out. Lucky for sugarmakers, this extra daytime pressure also means that sap will flow out of a tap! How to Tap a Tree As long as the tree is at least 10 inches in diameter, both maples native to northern Michigan—red maple and sugar maple— can be used to make syrup, but, as its name suggests, sugar maples are preferred due to their sap’s slightly higher sugar content. At its most basic, tapping involves drilling

a hole into a tree, pounding in a tap (also called a spile), and hanging a bucket or bag to catch the dripping sap. Each tap produces enough sap over the season to make about a quart of syrup. Using a cordless drill (or in Knecht’s case, a brace and bit), sugarmakers make a hole 1 1/2 to 2 inches deep into the tree, drilling at a slight upward angle—“two to three degrees is more than enough,” says Knecht—to help the sap flow out of the hole. Next, a metal spile is pounded into the hole with a rubber mallet or hammer. Buckets and bags are usually hung from the spiles on hooks, but larger buckets can also be placed on the ground below the tap with plastic tubing connecting them to the spile. Other supplies include bucket covers to keep out rain and snow and a large foodgrade barrel or reservoir to store sap in as buckets fill. Making Syrup from Sap The ratio of sap to syrup is, on average, 40:1, meaning that sap must be boiled for a long time in order to evaporate off enough water to turn it into syrup. While there are many boiling setups, the most important consideration is a boiling pan with a large surface area, which will help cut down on boiling time. Knecht, who has been producing maple syrup since 2011, notes that most of his sap is cooked down in a large evaporator (a specialized device that integrates a heating element below with a large pan on top), but a roasting pan set over an outdoor fire, a propane camp stove, or even a turkey fryer are also effective. Above all, sugarmakers must be hearty: Unless you have a sugar shack, all boiling takes place outside in the early spring chill, as the amount of steam created from hours of boiling inside is enough to make your wallpaper peel off or ruin other household items!

Sap is continually added to the pan throughout the boiling process. Once all the sap has been boiled down to a point where it is noticeably thicker than water, sugarmakers bring the almost-syrup inside to finish on a stove, where the temperature can be controlled more easily. Once inside, the liquid is typically filtered to remove any impurities—cheesecloth works well—and then boiled to achieve perfect density in a process referred to as finishing. Sugarmakers aim for a Brix reading of 66–66.9, meaning that the syrup is 66-66.9 percent sugar. The Brix of finishing syrup is measured indirectly by measuring density (which is a proxy for sugar content) with a hydrometer. Alternatively, because perfectdensity maple syrup boils at exactly 219.2 degrees Fahrenheit, a candy thermometer can also be used. Once the syrup reaches perfect density, it’s time for bottling. Any food-grade container will work as long as it’s new and clean, but home syrup-makers generally lean on good old Mason jars. Storing syrup jars in a cool, dry place will ensure that they remain fresh for at least a year, just in time for the next season of liquid gold. Other Maple Goodness While syrup is definitely the most wellknown, maple sap is also processed into maple candy, maple cream, and maple sugar. “For the native people,” notes Knecht, “maple sugar was the order of the day, as syrup was too hard to store and transport.” This product simply requires a bit more boiling time beyond the syrup stage—until the mixture reaches 260°F, to be exact—and stirring with a paddle to create a granulated texture. The stirring process is Knecht’s favorite part because “it’s amazing to watch it go from a thick wet peanut butter consistency to a fine grain sugar.”

See the Magic in Action

This coming weekend is northern lower Michigan’s “Maple Weekend” and a prime time to celebrate syrup season. Check out one (or a few!) of these events across the region to get your fix and purchase maple syrup and sugar. Southwell Sugar Shack 4700 Croy Lake Rd NE in Mancelona Saturday, March 26, from 10am to 4pm The annual Maple Open House is back! Tour this commercial-level maple syrup production facility, meet the sugarmakers, and sample a variety of maple goodies. Native Ways Traditional Arts 2152 Cassidy Rd in Levering Saturday, March 26, from 10am to 4pm Interpreter Keith Knecht will demonstrate the production of maple sugar as it was done hundreds of years ago by Native Americans. Sap is collected in birchbark containers, reduced in kettles, and finished into sugar by hand graining in a wooden trencher. Owl Ridge Maple Sugar Farm 3186 Sliverville Rd in Frankfort Saturday, March 26, and Sunday, March 27, from 11am to 4pm At this two-day open house, bring the whole family to see the evaporator going at full steam in the sugar house, then walk the beautiful self-guided trail down through the valley and over the ridge to see the sap collection in action.

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 9


Independent Study 10 Ways to Get Creative This Spring By Lynda Wheatley If you want to learn how to grout a tile floor or install a new toilet…well, you already know where to go. But if the coming spring is motivating you to learn something that’s actually fun and can improve your home or life, we’ve collected a host of in-person and virtual options that’ll take you from zero to hero and grant you some better dinner conversation starters than, “So I was turning these flange nuts on our new toilet yesterday…”

1. Make Your Own Dishware: Wheel Throwing (Traverse City) Transforming a wet lump of clay into a beautiful, functional shape isn’t simply a metaphor for life; it’s also what your hands do during the age-old practice of wheel throwing (derived from the Old English word thrawan, which means to turn or twist). ClaySpaceTC will provide the clay and teach you how to make your own real-life, usable piece of dinner or serving ware in one of five two-hour workshops remaining this spring. Keep your expectations high: By workshop’s end, you’ll have created an object that’ll be glazed, fired, and yours to keep. Next class, $35, is April 1. See clayspacetc.com for more.

2. Learn How to Hunt Your Own Dinner: Zero to Hunt (Online) Want to feed your family free-roaming grass-fed meat? Go one better than buying or raising your own animal and learn how to hunt Michigan game. Built for beginners, Zero to Hunt gives advice and insight on topics unique to the novice adult hunter, such as selecting your first weapon and gear, anxiety about taking an animal’s life, wild game nutrition, sighting a rifle scope, finding a hunting partner, and more. There is instruction for those interested in specific game—deer, ruffed grouse, rabbit, deer, turkey, and squirrel—and those curious about archery, hunting preserves, and how to hunt on public land. Start at zerotohunt.com, where you can also sign up for a newsletter and coaching.

3. Make Your Own…Everything: Tinker Studio (Old Mission Peninsula) Tinker Studio isn’t only a (newly moved and expanded!) place to wander about and gape at handmade jewelry, scarves, paintings, photography, ceramics, and other art available for inspiration and purchase; it’s a place for makers of all levels, curious beginner to seasoned pro. What we love best is that you don’t have to stick to prescheduled classes—you can simply scope out the shop’s available offerings and schedule a class in what interests you. Whether you (and up to three friends) want to learn how to weave on a loom, create an accordion book, paint a landscape, bead “by the piece,” draw, make jewelry, or undertake some other artistic endeavor, you can customize and schedule a two-hour class for $50 per person (adult learners age 16+ only) or a three-hour class for $75 per person. Four-class workshops range from $100 to $150 per person. Learn more at tinkerstudiotc.com

4. Add Horsepower to Your Kid’s Reading Skills: Circle M Acres (Ellsworth) So Circle M Acres’ Learning with Four-Legged Leaders is not technically a do-it-yourself workshop— more a do-it-with-a horse’shelp workshop—but its literacy program, which just launched this month, helps kids from pre-K through SAT prep learn and improve critical reading skills… while they’re sitting atop horses. Yup. The equestrian hub’s “horse-powered” reading program (not riding program) is based on 10 years of research and employed by facilitators from around the world. It’s also darn fun for students who struggle to sit still with a book in hand. The introductory rate is $90 for three sessions. Call (231) 714-0103 or email Jeannamichelek@gmail.com for more information.

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5. Plant Your Own Wall Art: Floral Underground at Farm Club (Leelanau) If you’ve been within 6 feet of a home magazine or chic urban restaurant in the last couple of years, you’ve likely seen some wall art made of living or faux plants. This spring, Derek Woodruff of Floral Underground will host a hands-on workshop showing you how to make a small version of your own using differently colored and textured mosses, extremely low-maintenance air plants, and other decorative materials. The class will be held at 1pm Saturday, April 9, inside Farm Club’s heated Shepherd’s Tent. Ticket fee, $50, includes all materials. Find the event by searching Farm Club at Eventbrite.com. Can’t make the date? Head to the Workshops tab at floralunderground.com to choose from an assortment of plant-based classes—create your own terrarium workshop, plant music amplifier, succulent wreath, and more—and you can schedule when you’re ready.

7. Paint Those Bricks: Boyne Co-op True Value Hardware (Boyne City) If you’ve inherited a brick fireplace, brick accent wall, or brick archway from your home’s previous owners and you hate it, there’s a far less costly alternative to removal: painting it. Boyne Co-op shows homeowners what they need to know, do, and buy before tackling the repainting of any interior brick—plus a little advice if you’re considering repainting any exterior brick on your home. (Short answer: Probably not a good idea in northern Michigan.) Find it—and other DIY topics like Using a Lift for Winter Projects— on their blog at boynecoop.com.

9. Grow Your Own Food: Michigan State University Extension (Online) It doesn’t matter if you don’t know a green squash from a zucchini; food prices are skyrocketing, and right now happens to be the perfect time to start planning your Up North vegetable garden. (Note to newbies: Planning, not planting—that’s May for most of us.) Michigan State University Extension offers loads of education opportunities, from the selfpaced accessible anytime Smart Gardening with Vegetables 101 (search Vegetable Garden at canr.msu.edu) to ready-made Simple Vegetable Garden Plans featuring easy-to-grow kitchen staples, helpful beginner gardening videos, and even a state-wide hotline for any of your gardening-related questions 1-888-678-3464 (1-888-MSUE-4MI). Find the latter three by clicking the Horticulture Programs at the Leelanau County Extension home page, canr. msu.edu/leelanau.

6. Learn How to Taste Cheese: Petoskey Cheese (Petoskey) Yes, you’ve eaten cheese. On burgers, sandwiches, soups, and salads. But if you’ve ever found yourself wanting to build a truly tantalizing charcuterie board, you’ve got to break through the plastic wrapping and wax rinds and really, really get to know cheese. Katie Pots of Petoskey Cheese is your gal. On April 14, she’s offering Cheese Tasting 101, a crash course through North Central Michigan College’s Lifelong Learning program. In one hour, she’ll cover the five families of cheese, new and old-world styles, and any cheesy questions you might have as you nibble. $40. Register at ncmc.com/event-4737465 if you can make the 5:30pm class, but if you can’t, simply email hello@petoskeycheese.com to schedule a private Tasting 101 or cooking class at a time that works for you.

8. Create, Create, Create: Gaylord Area Council for the Arts (Gaylord) We think creative arts are a life skill, and Gaylord Area Arts Council for the Arts seems to agree. The organization not only has an ongoing array of inperson art classes for kids and adults—on tap still this month are an Intro to Zen Tangling and classes in nature photography and figure drawing—but also offers access to recorded workshops dating back to September 2020, all free. Viewers can kick back with a glass of wine (or juice, for kids’ classes, of course) and learn how to begin a nature journal, build a woven teepee night-light, draw realistic birds, understand perspective, make fabric and paper beads, and much more. See gaylordarts.org.

10. Do Your Own Taxes (With Free Professional Help): Northwest Michigan Community Action Agency If you earn about $58,000 or less, you can have your tax return prepared for you by a professional tax preparer… for free. Northwest Michigan Community Action Agency offers this service through locations in Cadillac, Charlevoix, Traverse City, and Benzie. Simply go to Downloads at nmcaa. net to download a simple tax packet, fill it out, and, along with copies of the personal documents requested, mail, fax, email, or drop off your forms. Your taxes will be prepared and quality reviewed within two weeks. Learn more at nmcaa.net/ tax_preparation.asp.

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 11


REAL ESTATE PROS SHARE THEIR SECRETS Weekend DIY projects to spruce up your home By Al Parker March Madness is underway on college basketball courts, but it’s also happening here in northern Michigan. It’s that heady, springtime feeling that hits homeowners who are interested in selling their houses. Northern Express reached out to real estate experts across the region seeking tips for folks looking to enhance their home’s value or beauty over a weekend, on a budget, and with minimal DIY skills. Here is their sage advice.

BEFORE Painted Tile

Bridget Maguire of Coldwell Banker Schmidt Realtors TIP #1: Paint Dated Tile “Backsplashes, showers, [and] tiled countertops can all use a nice lift with a few coats of tile paint. One pack of Rust-Oleum’s Tub & Tile paint can cover 10-110 square feet of tiled space for only $50, although I would recommend doing a few coats.” How to: • Remove caulk by any seams that will need to be re-caulked • Clean and sand the tile area • Tape off and cover areas that will not be painted • Put on safety gear and ventilate your workspace • Use disposable rollers and/or paint brushes to apply paint to the tile area. Let the first coat dry and apply another. • Allow room to dry. Consider staying elsewhere for a day or two while the paint dries and the fumes dissipate. Cost: $200 for paint, brushes/rollers, tape, drop cloths, gloves, safety goggles, and tile cleaner Labor: 1-2 days

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AFTER Painted Tile

TIP #2: Power Wash Your Home’s Exterior “I think that a power washer is one of the most valuable tools a homeowner could own, from removing chipped paint to cleaning vinyl siding, decks, and concrete to removing moss and preparing windows and screens for warmer weather…and even cleaning area rugs!” How to: • Hook up the power washer to a garden hose. Start at the highest point of the project (top of the house, top of the driveway). Be sure to check pressure and/or test spots before using machines on decking, wood siding, etc. • Clean all areas near windows and entry areas. Follow window cleaning with proper window cleaner and squeegee. • Once your driveway or deck has been cleaned, take out your exterior rugs and even interior area rugs (that can be cleaned). Use biodegradable soap and the power washer to clean the rugs. Use foldable picnic tables or saw horses to hang rugs dry in the garage or under a porch. Cost: Buy a power washer for as little as $99 or rent from TC Rentals for $75-$90 per day, depending on the machine. Labor: half a day to a weekend, depending on the scope of the cleaning


AFTER Painted Cabinets

AFTER Clean and Organized Mechanical Room

Melissa Townsend of Mackinac Properties

Jon Zickert of The Jon Zickert Group, Real Estate One – Beulah/Frankfort

TIP #1: Spruce Up Your Cabinets “My husband and I brought a piece of history back to life [in St. Ignace]. The tips I would have would be to stick with it and don’t compromise with rushing the work. What we did was simply time consuming, but really DIY projects anyone can do. This included tasteful but easy and affordable cabinets enhanced with a new coat (well, several coats) of trendy royal blue paint.”

TIP #1: Clean and Organize Your Mechanical Room. “The mechanical room is home to many high-ticket items. If a potential buyer sees that you maintain this room and its mechanicals, [they’ll] imagine how you maintain the rest of the house. It sounds silly at first, but sellers love the results. One client even said he should have done it 10 years ago and can’t believe what a difference it made.”

How to: • Remove the cabinet drawers, doors, and shelves and take them to your painting workstation (recommended to be outside of the kitchen so you can still use it throughout the process). Be sure to label each piece so you know exactly where it goes! • Remove hinges and pulls, which can be reused or replaced after painting and drying are finished • Put on safety gear and ventilate your workspace • Clean and sand your cabinets as needed (based on factory finish, previous paint, etc.). You may need to strip previous paint depending on the state of the cabinets. • Prime the cabinets and let dry before sanding. Then it’s time to paint! Use a high-quality brush (synthetic for latex paint, natural-bristle for oil-based paint). Let dry and lightly sand between coats as needed. • Meanwhile, clean and tape off the cabinet frames in your kitchen (if painting). These can be sanded, primed, and painted as well. • Once fully dried, cabinets can be rehung in the kitchen Cost: $300 for paint, primer, brushes/rollers, tape, drop cloths, safety gear, and sanding and prep tools. Labor: 2 days

How to: • Clean all mechanicals, removing dust and stains • Organize items (the fewer the better) • Paint the floor with gray concrete paint (be sure to clean it properly ahead of time!) Cost: $50 for paint and materials Labor: 2-4 hours TIP #2: The Four-Diamond Hotel Room Expectation “What are your expectations when checking into a four-diamond hotel regarding room cleanliness and upkeep? We suggest sellers step outside the front door and imagine walking into their home for the first time. Start in one corner of the entry and review each room. Note any cleaning and maintenance needed on a notepad.” How to: • Look for dust, clutter, wall marks (a Magic Eraser does wonders), water stains on ceilings, dusty or rusty vent covers, and burnt out light bulbs • Windows should be cleaned, and be sure to check for fogging between panes • Prepare your list of bigger-ticket updates for the future Cost: $50 or under for cleaning supplies Labor: half a day to a weekend based on what needs cleaning

A REAL REMODEL

Want to go bigger with your changes? Try a bathroom fixture update, where your average return on investment can be in excess of 200 percent. A full remodel has a hefty price tag around $14,000, but what if you just concentrated on a few areas? “Replace the vanity, sink, and toilet and leave the tub and floor,” says Rick Matley of the Difference Real Estate in Kalkaska. “This minor remodel would cost, on average, about $7,500 and could look like a complete remodel. I have recommended and seen this scenario unfold recently. Although it is hard to say for 100 percent certain, we believe we obtained approximately $20,000 more for this residence because of this minor remodel.” Matley says the remodel will take about one week from start to finish, and he recommends finishing touches like repainting the bathroom walls, washing the floors, and re-caulking the tub or shower once you’re done.

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 13


SIMPLIFY YOUR SPRING CLEANING Tips from the Marie Kondo of Traverse City

By Brighid Driscoll Michiganders, pat yourselves on the back. We’re emerging from another long winter, and our prize is on the horizon. More sunny days are beginning to crop up on the forecast; thawed earth squishes under muddy boots; and the icicles melting off gutters provide a steady beat to the changing time. Spring is near. So is spring cleaning, a tradition that people love and hate in equal measure. Northern Express turned to Jess Kellogg, a professional organizer in Traverse City, for guidance when it comes to refreshing our homes for the spring. Kellogg is the owner of Organize You by Jess, a service she’s created to help others in the way that she’s helped herself. “My husband and I have moved a few times over the years, and I’ve always been the one to organize our home,” Kellogg explains. “I’ve been a pretty organized person my whole life, but [after] we had our son was really when I wanted to focus on building a system that would be easy to maintain.” The Traverse City local wanted to spend as much time as possible enjoying her family and free time, and she knew that if she could organize her home in an intuitive way, she could drastically cut down on the dreaded

end-of-week scramble to get everything cleaned up in one day. “When my home is organized, I feel like my mind is organized. I don’t want to feel cluttered in either,” Kellogg says. Where to Begin The best place to start is where there is excess. Our possessions, Kellogg says, are places where we store a lot of emotions. We hold on to a lot of items out of guilt or familiarity without justifying their use or the space they take up. “A lot of it comes down to emotional attachment or guilt,” she says. “Someone gives you a gift, and you feel like it’s wrong to get rid of it. But when you accumulate all of this stuff, it turns into a daily battle of dealing with it. The best thing to do is to pare down to what you truly love and be totally fine with letting the rest go.” Kellogg’s roadmap to navigating your spring cleaning involves asking yourself a few questions: • Do I need it? I’m not very attached to my hand mixer, but I do use it. • Do I like it? This is where people have a hard time because this is where emotions come in, but try to be realistic with yourself. • Is it sentimental? Some things are meant to stay in your family.

14 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

Start Small When getting started, it may be tempting to begin where people spend the most time: in the living room or kitchen. However, Kellogg says that the first thing people should do is tackle something small. “You want to start with something you can have success with right away. Maybe it’s your utensil drawer or junk drawer in the kitchen. Take every single thing out, and as you’re putting them back, ask yourself those core questions we talked about earlier and see how much you can get rid of.” Getting rid of low-stakes, smaller items, makes it easier to get rid of bigger items later on.

Organization tools that help: • Compartmentalized storage • Expand-a-drawer organizers The Entryway Envision what the entrance to your home looks like on any given day. Maybe you’re seeing lots of salt crusted shoes or old mail. Maybe you’re seeing piles of boots and coats and backpacks. Whatever you find, clear it up and out. “[Entryways] get so dirty from the winter and tracking in dirt and snow,” Kellogg says. “I like to take everything out

and deep clean it; put away all of our heavy coats, boots, mittens, and other winter things; and swap out for our spring stuff. The entryway is the first thing you see when you get home, so you don’t want to be bombarded with clutter.”

Organization tools that help: • Entry benches or tables with storage space • Shoe racks • Coat hooks The Closet In her organizing experience, Kellogg has found that clothes are some of the worst culprits for clutter accumulation. People hold on to clothing that no longer fits out of nostalgia or desire to fit into them again. In reality, most people wear less than half of what they have in their wardrobe. Our emotional ties to clothing are particularly strong because of their proximity to what our self-image is…or once was. But these pieces of clothing that we don’t acknowledge most of the time take up physical and emotional real estate that they aren’t worth. “Keep your mind in the here and now,” Kellogg advises. “Wear what fits now and get rid of the rest.”


Old Town Playhouse and Cherryland Electric Cooperative present

Book By Hunter Bell Music & lyrics By Jeff Bowen

March 31 - April 10 Curtain @ 7:30pm | Matinee @ 2pm MainStage Theatre (148 E. 8th St.) OldTownPlayhouse.com

231.947.2210

JOIN US FOR

(LATE)

East Bay Drive

The Future Whatever your spring cleaning looks like, keep a few things in mind to stay clutter-free for the rest of the year. “The biggest thing is changing your mindset when you’re at the store,” Kellogg says. “Just because something is on sale and it’s pretty doesn’t mean you have to buy it. If a family member gives you something you don’t love, you don’t have to keep it. Really ask yourself where you have a place for something before you bring it into your home. It saves you so much time in the long run and allows you to enjoy what you really love.” Find Jess Kellogg at organizeyoubyjess.com and organizeyoubyjess@gmail.com.

Alex Wyant

Organization tools that help: • Labeled jars and baskets • Dedicating shelves to specific types of items • Clear storage racks or boxes

John Paul

The Pantry Pantries, kitchen shelves, and cabinets can quickly become overstuffed. While looking for a box of spaghetti, you find you have three that are already opened and half empty, or when baking you discover you have multiples of the same spice. “People have stuff they end up not using in their kitchens,” Kellogg says. “Shopping for groceries is different from shopping for something like clothes. It can be easy to get home, throw everything into the pantry, and be done with it. Some of that stuff ends up expiring and just taking up space. Other times people end up with several of the same thing.” To avoid this, Kellogg says to take inventory after making up your weekly grocery list. Take your list with you to your

pantry and cabinets and cross off what you already have. You might be surprised how much your list shortens.

Rick Kiehle

Organization tools that help: • Thoughtful use of hanging space, shelf space, and/or dresser space • Group similar items together • Organize clothes by color, use, or fabric type • Transfer seasonal attire to another space or a storage box

David Chown

FEATURING

Sunday, March 27th

3 PM, DOORS OPEN 2:30

Château Chantal wine 225 W Fourteenth Traverse City Across from the State Police Post

MASKS REQUIRED

Food from the Good Bowl

GT Circuit $20 donation

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 15


mar 19

saturday

CARNIVAL WEEKEND: Boyne Mountain Resort, Boyne Falls, March 18-20. Featuring a Spring-a-licious Snow Beach Party, live music with Run Forest, Run & DJ Bill da Cat, Adult Costume Contest, Aprés Ski Party featuring DJ Mike, Slush Cup (donations benefit Challenge Mountain) & more. boynemountain.com/upcomingevents/carnival-weekend

---------------------CELTS & KAYAKS: 9am-4pm, Crystal Mountain, Thompsonville. Look for on-hill leprechauns for some luck of the Irish & a photo op. Also featuring Kayaks on the Snow Race, On-Slope Scavenger Hunt, food, Pot of Gold Challenge, music & the Slush Cup. crystalmountain.com/event/celts-kayaks

---------------------RING IN SPRING AT THE HIGHLANDS: The Highlands at Harbor Springs. Today features Slush Cup registration, wine tastings featuring northern Michigan wineries, live music in Zoo Bar, & Slush Cup. highlandsharborsprings.com

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elegant young lady who meets her prince at the ball. Performances are Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays & Sundays from Feb. 17 through March 19, starting at 2pm on Sundays & 7:30pm all other days. Adults: $28; youth under 18: $15 (plus fees). tickets. oldtownplayhouse.com/TheatreManager/1/ login&event=358 BASSEL & THE SUPERNATURALS: 8pm, Dennos Museum Center, Milliken Auditorium, NMC, TC. Hear the story of Bassel Almadani’s experience as a first generation SyrianAmerican. Enjoy soulful melodies, funk inspired rhythms, & lyrics regarding love, loss, & the war in Syria. $20-$28. simpletix.com/e/ bassel-the-supernaturals-tickets-79515

THE SIXTIES SOUND FEATURING MICKY DOLENZ & THE FAB FOUR: 8pm, Little River Casino Resort, Manistee. $0-$55. lrcr.com/ event-calendar/concerts/the-sixties-sound

mar 20

sunday

CARNIVAL WEEKEND: (See Sat., March 19)

-------------

TC BOAT SHOW: 10am-6pm, GT Civic Center, TC. Featuring a selection of pontoons, ski boats, cruisers, personal watercraft, docks, boat lifts, paddle boards & more. Presented by Blue Water Promotions. $7 adults, $2 ages 6-15, free 5 & under. traversecityboatshow.com

LOCAL SHIPWRECK HUNTER ROSS RICHARDSON PRESENTS MICHIGAN MYSTERIES: 2pm, Traverse Area District Library, McGuire Community Room, TC. Explore some of Michigan’s most mysterious disappearances & learn how some of these baffling cold cases get solved. Includes shipwreck stories & documentation & updates on current searches for missing aircraft. This program is held in person & via Zoom. Register. Free. events.tadl.org/ events/local-shipwreck-hunter-ross-richardson-presents-michigan-mysteries

MAPLEFEST: 11am-3pm, Grass River Natural Area Center, Pavilion, Bellaire. Stop by & see the process in action of making maple syrup. Ask staff questions & hike on the trail to see where they tap trees, hang buckets & lines, & collect sap. grassriver.org

---------------------WOMEN’S MARCH TC PROTEST: 1-3pm. Women’s March TC will hold a protest against the war on Ukraine. Stand on the sidewalks at the corner of Union & the Parkway, downtown TC. Bring signs & your voice. They request donations be made to Voices of Children. Call Monica at 231-325-6812 with questions or for more info.

---------------------GOPHERWOOD CONCERTS PRESENTS DREW NELSON & HIGHWAY 2: 7-9:30pm, Cadillac Elks Lodge. Nelson is a storytelling songwriter & multi-instrumentalist, as well as a fly fisherman & world traveler. He writes about those he has met along the way, mixing Americana & roots-rock with traditional folk styles. He has toured with Melissa Etheridge & Edwin McCain. $7-$15. mynorthtickets.com/ events/drew-nelson-highway-2-3-19-2022

---------------------OLD MISSION FIDDLE VINE: 7pm, The Music House Museum, Williamsburg. Michael Markley (fiddle) & his band mates specialize in fun, upbeat American country, bluegrass, Cajun & Irish traditional music. Special guest, performer & local teacher, Peter Deneen, will also perform. $25. mynorthtickets. com/events/the-music-house-museum-isproud-to-present-old-mission-fiddle-vine-onmarch-19-at-700pm-3-19-2022

---------------------RODGERS & HAMMERSTEIN’S CINDERELLA: Old Town Playhouse, TC. Forced into a life of servitude, a young woman dreams of a better life. Then, with the help of her fairy godmother, she is transformed into an

send your dates to: events@traverseticker.com

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14TH ANNUAL TC BOAT SHOW: (See Sat., March 19, except today’s times are 10am-4pm.)

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19-27

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FROZEN JR. AUDITIONS: 10am, First Presbyterian Church, Cadillac. Casting for a large cast of kids, ages 8-13. Performance dates are June 16-19. Presented by Cadillac Footliters. sites.google.com/view/frozenjr-auditions/?fbcli d=IwAR1Hz070cskmJMPEoXT6BWJXRe0xb E1a7YHlmP2uBziPRDqPkuiVBqwOEs4

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march

---------------------TC SENIOR CENTER RALLY: Noon, TC Senior Center, 801 E. Front St., TC. Rally for a new building for seniors to use.

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---------------------A FAMILY SURPRISE - MUSIC FOR EVERYONE: 3pm, Interlochen Center for the Arts, Corson Auditorium. Presented by the Traverse Symphony Orchestra, this program will include Peter and the Wolf, Carnival of the Animals, A Little Night Music & Hadyn’s Surprise Symphony. $28-$65. traversesymphony.org/concert/a-family-surprise

---------------------FRIENDS OF IPL CICERO’S PIZZA FUNDRAISER EVENT: Order pizza from Interlochen’s Cicero’s tonight from 4-9pm & 25% of the sales will be given to Interlochen Public Library to support community programs. To order call 231-276-6324. cicerospizzainterlochen.com

---------------------TARPS FOR PINTS: Join Restoration Church & Right Brain Brewery in collecting tarps, solar chargers, & crank flashlights for the homeless community. Bring a donation to Right Brain Brewery starting at 4pm & get a pint for $1. Live music.

mar 21

monday

PDL COMMUNITY DISCUSSION: Join Petoskey District Library (PDL) & Mzinigangamik Cultural Library for a discussion of Poet Laureate Joy Harjo’s An American Sunrise. 5:30pm, Petoskey District Library Classroom. Free. petoskeylibrary.org/using-the-library/community-reads/

---------------------HOP FANS UNITE: A STORY OF BEER: 5:30pm, Farm Club, TC. Corey Valdez, the

16 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

POWDER FOR PAWS PARTY! Support the homeless animals at Little Traverse Bay Humane Society by attending this party at Nub’s Nob in Harbor Springs, Sat., March 26 from 4-7pm. Held on the deck, there will be food including mini brats, sliders, macaroni and cheese, a hot chocolate station and more. Tickets are $50 ($10 for kids 6-12 years old and kids under 5 are free) and must be purchased by March 18 at 5pm. Find ‘Powder for Paws’ on Facebook.

wizard behind the Farm Club brewery, has a background in organic chemistry, which allows him to understand the subtleties in making good beer. Join him for a relaxed night of beer storytelling. Get to know the beer making process at Farm Club, how they find inspiration from the farm & create nuanced & drinkable beer. Tickets are $35 & include 4 beer samplings & a shared tasting platter. farmclubtc.com/events-2/farmclub-beer-gathering

---------------------HERE:SAY PRESENTS: A TWO-THEME MASHUP: 7pm, The Workshop Brewing Co., TC. Here:Say is coming back for a limited run “lost season” in 2022, staging the Season 7 shows that got sidelined in 2020. Enjoy live storytelling featuring scheduled performers & a mashup of two themes— ”Ventriloquist” & “Game Over”—in one show. Free. heresaystorytelling.com

mar 23

wednesday

TC TRACK CLUB FUN RUN: 6:30-8pm, The Little Fleet, TC. Run will start from the parking lot across the street, next to Real Estate One. Reflective gear, lights & traction footwear (if needed) strongly encouraged. Run, socialize & meet fellow runners! Free. There will be 3 & 5 mile routes for runners. Find ‘Fun Run at Little Fleet’ on Facebook.

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FREE MASTERCLASS: 6:30-7:30pm, Cambria Hotel, Old Mission Room, TC. With Ellen Airgood, author of “Tin Camp Road.” Ninth through twelfth graders are eligible to enroll for this discussion of creative writing from a fellow northern Michigander. nationalwritersseries.org/author-masterclasses/ masterclass-ellen-airgood/?utm_source= National+Writers+Series+Email+Audienc e&utm_campaign=7920e26866-EMAIL_ CAMPAIGN_2022_03_02_03_34&utm_ medium=e

mar 24

thursday

CRAFTERNOON: 4-5pm, Bellaire Public Library. For ages 16+. Paint wooden eggs using the pointillism method of painting. Register. events.getlocalhop.com/ crafternoon/event/FubPEvpfR6

---------------------BELLAIRE CHAMBER BUSINESS AFTER HOURS: 5:30-7pm, Hello Vino, Bellaire. Enjoy mingling, food & drinks. $5.

---------------------FREE LAUNDRY SERVICE FOR THOSE IN NEED: 8:30-11:30am, Eastfield Laundry, TC. Held the second & fourth Thursdays of the month. 947-3780.

---------------------PARALLEL 45 THEATRE READING SERIES: 6-8pm, Historic Barns Park, Cathedral Barn, TC. “Gary, A Sequel to Titus Andronicus.” Enjoy this reading of Taylor Mac’s play. Mac, who uses “judy” as a gender pronoun, is a non-binary playwright, actor, singer-songwriter & director whose works have been produced around the world. $5-$50 donation suggested. mynorthtickets.com/ events/gary-a-sequel-to-titus-andronicuspresented-by-parallel-45-theatre-3-24-2022

---------------------GRAND TRAVERSE AUDUBON CLUB MEETING: 7pm, Boardman River Nature Center, TC. Award-winning photographer Evan Reister will tell you about the Michigan Young Birders Network. Find out what these young folks (ages 13-18) are up to, & how you, or a young person you know, can get involved. Free. grandtraverseaudubon.org

---------------------NWS PRESENTS ELLEN AIRGOOD (INPERSON & LIVESTREAMED): 7pm, City Opera House, TC. Ellen runs the West Bay Diner in the U.P. town of Grand Marais, & is a writer. Her newest book is “Tin Camp Road.” Guest host is writer, teacher, columnist, humanitarian, & friend of NWS Susan Odgers. Tickets: In-Person: $5-$25. Virtual: $10.50. nationalwritersseries.org/product/ ellen-airgood


TRIVIA NIGHT: 7-9pm, Old Art Building, Leland. Presented by the Leland Township Library & Old Art Building. Come up with a team name & register online. Prizes for winning teams. $20/team. oldartbuilding.com

mar 25

friday

30TH ANNUAL NORTHWEST MICHIGAN RV & CAMPING SHOW: 11am8pm, GT County Civic Center, TC. March 25-27. More than 40 units will be displayed, including folding camping trailers, travel trailers & fifth wheel travel trailers. There will be exhibitors featuring campground info, dealer on-site RV financing, & RV rentals. $7 for ages 13+; $6 for ages 55+; free for 12 & under. showpass.com/2022-northwest-rv-camping-show

---------------------COMEDY WITH IAN BAGG: 7:30pm & 10pm, TC Comedy Club, TC. First learning he was funny from other kids sitting the bench in hockey, Bagg earned a top-5 finish on NBC’s “Last Comic Standing.” He’s also been on “Late Night with Conan O’Brien,” “The Tonight Show,” & more. He’s performed multiple collaborative NHL alumni shows for teams such as the Detroit Red Wings, St. Louis Blues & the Toronto Maple Leafs. $20$25. traversecitycomedyclub.com/ian-bagg

---------------------TODD SNIDER: PICKIN’. GRINNIN’. TELLIN’ STORIES. TAKIN’ REQUESTS.: 8pm, City Opera House, TC. Snider’s latest release, “First Agnostic Church of Hope and Wonder,” is “an arrival after years of searching.” Special guest Aaron Lee Tasjan will join Snider. Tasjan is a “genre-bending rising star who’s bold reimagination of classic sounds and songwriting has established him as one of the most idiosyncratic artists of his generation.” $30, $25; students, $15. cityoperahouse.org/node/429

mar 26

saturday

EARLY SPRING BIRD WALK: 9-11am, Grass River Natural Area, Bellaire. Look & listen for early arrivals. Binoculars are available to borrow, or bring your own. If there is still snow, bring snowshoes, or rent some for an additional $5 in the Grass River Center. Limited space. Please pre-register. $5. grassriver.org

---------------------30TH ANNUAL NORTHWEST MICHIGAN RV & CAMPING SHOW: (See Fri., March 25)

---------------------RETRO DAY: 11am-2pm, Crystal Mountain, Thompsonville. Wear your neon, ringer tees, gigantic jeans & vintage sweaters. Enjoy retro favorites from a DJ, On-Slope Scavenger Hunt, Candy Jar Challenge, & Costume Contest. crystalmountain.com/event/retroweekend

---------------------POWDER FOR PAWS: 4-7pm, Nub’s Nob, Harbor Springs. Benefits the homeless animals at Little Traverse Bay Humane Society. Includes food & live music from Jeff Pagel. Tickets are $50/person ($10 for kids 6-12 years old & kids under 5 are free) & must be purchased by 5pm March 18. ltbhs.givecloud.co/product/powderforpawsticket/powder-for-paws-tickets?fbclid=IwAR1uGQBJ6 HrwJu5iKZuvtWeF3dxTZ9othlsAhtiOSt6HK JGUQphL90GvYP8

---------------------COMEDY WITH IAN BAGG: (See Fri., March 25, except tonight’s times are 7pm & 9:30pm.)

---------------------SELF-GUIDED LANTERN LIT HIKE: 7:309:30pm, Kids Creek Park, TC. Naturalists

will greet you with hot cocoa at the trailhead. This one-mile trail is a short, accessible & engaging walk - perfect for the whole family. Register. Free. gtcd.wufoo.com/forms/ mgp3inf0lkyufj

mar 27

sunday

JAZZ (LATE) BRUNCH: With East Bay Drive. 3pm, GT Circuit, TC. Featuring Chateau Chantal wine & food from the Good Bowl. $20 donation.

---------------------30TH ANNUAL NORTHWEST MICHIGAN RV & CAMPING SHOW: (See Fri., March 25, except today’s times are 11am-5pm.)

---------------------GREAT LAKES CHAMBER ORCHESTRA PRESENTS “DOUBLE REED STAMPEDE”: 4pm, First Congregational Church, Charlevoix. This concert features woodwind instruments with two reeds, such as oboe & bassoon. Free. glcorchestra.org/concerts

ongoing

GTCD ANNUAL NATIVE SEEDLING SALE: Presented by the Grand Traverse Conservation District. Offering more than 25 high-quality, bare-root tree & shrub species. This year’s selection includes four Michigan Assisted Tree Range Expansion Project (ATREP) species to support Climate Change resilience in our forests. The sale runs through March 31 with order pick-ups at the Boardman River Nature Center on April 2930. natureiscalling.org/native-seedling-sale

---------------------BELLAIRE WINTER FARMERS MARKET: Fridays, 9am-1pm, Downtown Bellaire. Held at two locations: Bee Well & Terrain. Produce, eggs, meats, honey, maple syrup, baked goods, local artists, crafts, & more.

---------------------INDOOR FARMERS MARKET: Saturdays, 10am-2pm, The Village at GT Commons, The Mercato corridor in Building 50, TC. thevillagetc.com

---------------------PRESCHOOL STORY TIME: Tuesdays, 10:30am, Suttons Bay Bingham District Library. Start your day with stories & more. sbbdl.org

art

SPOTLIGHT ON INNOVATION 2022: Charlevoix Circle of Arts, Charlevoix. This annual exhibit showcases student artwork. Students, teachers & community members will be in attendance. Artwork from area 11th & 12th grade students will be on display through April 9. Free Youth Art Lab classes for ages 10 & up will take place during the exhibit timeframe: March 19, 1-3pm: Watercolor Paintings & Pastels; March 25, 1-3pm: Air-Dry Clay; April 9, 1-3pm: Intro to Sewing with Sewing Machines. Pre-registration required. charlevoixcircle.org

---------------------ROCK PAPER SCISSORS SCRAP: Jordan River Arts Council, East Jordan. This show includes all mediums & celebrates all or one of the components in the title. The Gallery will be open Fri. - Sat. & Sun. from 1-4pm through March 25 during this exhibit. jordanriverarts.com

---------------------YOUTHS ARTS EXHIBIT: Crooked Tree Arts Center, TC. Celebrating the work of K-12 art students & educators from throughout the Grand Traverse region. Runs through April 16. crookedtree.org/event/ctac-traverse-city/ youth-arts-exhibit-traverse-city

---------------------PAPERCRAFTS BY BETH SHUSTER: Alden District Library. Runs March 2-30. 231331-4318.

CROOKED TREE ARTS CENTER, PETOSKEY: - NCMC STUDENT SHOW: Runs through April 9 in Atrium Gallery. This annual exhibition recognizes the work of NCMC students. crookedtree.org/event/ctac-petoskey/ncmcstudent-show - 2022 YOUTH ART SHOW: Young artists working throughout Char-Em ISD are showcased in the Gilbert & Bonfield galleries. A reception will be held on Sat., March 19 from 2-4pm. Runs March 19 - May 11. crookedtree.org/event/ctac-petoskey/2022youth-art-show

---------------------DENNOS MUSEUM CENTER, NMC, TC: - COLOR & SHAPE: BLACK ARTISTS FROM THE DENNOS COLLECTION: This exhibit of works by Black American artists highlights the growing legacy of this collection. Comprising 70 years of artistic prowess, the collection ranges from abstract painting to figurative drawing & digital photography. Artists include Charles McGee, Carole Harris, Felrath Hines & Dex Jones. On view through April 3, Tues. - Sun. from 11am-4pm. dennosmuseum.org/art/now-onview/temporary-exhibits/color-shape.html - NWMI JURIED EXHIBITION: The 2022 NWMI Regional Juried Exhibition submissions comprised 388 artworks from 217 artists throughout the 37-county region. The final juried show features 94 artworks from 83 artists, with media ranging from charcoal, watercolor, & acrylics to aluminum, wood, fiber, & more. Held regularly at the Museum for 30 years, the exhibition features art made by regional artists over the last year & juried by an arts professional outside of the region. On view through May 29, every Tues. - Sun., 11am-4pm. dennosmuseum.org/art/now-onview/temporary-exhibits/nwmi-juried-exhibition.html - NATHALIE MIEBACH EXHIBITION: Based in Boston, Massachusetts, Miebach’s exhibition, “Stay Healthy and Strong,” features new installations & sculptures that she completed during a 2021 residency at the Ucross Foundation in Sheridan, Wyoming. It explores climate data & COVID trends through art. Runs through May 29. Open Tues. through Sun. from 11am-4pm. dennosmuseum.org/?utm_source=cision&utm_ medium=email&utm_campaign=DMC-Nathalie-Miebach - THE ART OF: DEL MICHEL: Michel has participated in competitive & invitational exhibitions throughout the U.S. & has won many prizes. He has been selected for seven international exhibitions & is represented in numerous private, corporate, & university & museum collections throughout the U.S., Europe & Mexico. On view through April 3, Tues. - Sun, 11am-4pm. dennosmuseum. org/art/now-on-view/temporary-exhibits/delmichel.html

---------------------GLEN ARBOR ARTS CENTER: - “PAPERWORK”: Runs through March 24. This exhibition focuses on works on paper, & works made of paper. It features the work of 21 artists from throughout Michigan, Massachusetts, Missouri, & the nation of Chile. Check web site for hours. glenarborart.org/ events/paperwork-exhibition - “WOODLAND STUDIES”: A small exhibition of black & white photographs by Grand Rapids photographer Rodney Martin. It runs through April 13 in the Lobby Gallery. Martin focuses his lens on the landscape. For the images in “Woodland Studies,” he zeros in on rivers, woods & orchards in Benzie, Grand Traverse & Leelanau counties. See web site for hours. glenarborart.org/events/ exhibit-woodland-studies

live

stand-up

ian bagg

march 25-26 Ian Bagg is a world touring comedian and the host of the weekly podcast, Ian Bagg Bought a House. His quick wit, off-the-cuff antics, playful conversation, and fast paced crowd work has earned him spots on some of the best stages in the world. he’s also appeared on Late Night with Conan O’Brien, The Tonight Show, Adam Corolla Show, WTF with Marc Maron, and The Wrap Up Show on Howard Stern.

april 1 a prolific stand-up comedian, writer, actor, and producer, Christopher Titus plays to sold-out clubs and theaters around the country. With a take no prisoners wit, he has written and starred in eight 90 minute comedy specials, some of which spent months on the Billboard Top Ten Comedy Chart. Chris Titus is a voice like no other.

s

christopher titu

april 8-9 With his innocence and friendly demeanor, Mitch fatel quickly engages the audience and then catches them off guard with a mixture of mischievous dialog and ofF-color comments. mitch has appeared on almost every Late Night Comedy Show and took home honors as the Best Comedian at the HBO Aspen Comedy Festival.

MITCH F ATEL

april 22-23 BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT May 6-7 MICHAEL PALASCAK may 20 -21 JOHN HEFFRON

enjoy

food, drgreat & LAUGHinks, S!

to purchase tickets and view our full schedule, visit traversecitycomedyclub.com or call 231.421.1880 ask about hosting your next event here!

738 S. Garfield Avenue, Traverse City

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 17


S M O K Y O L D FA S H I O N E D 2 OZ BRECKENRIDGE BOURBON WHISKEY 3 D A S H E S A N G O S T U R A A R O M AT I C B I T T E R S 1 T E A S P O O N R AW S U G A R 1 D E H Y D R AT E D O R A N G E W H E E L

Stir the ingredients over a large ice cube or ball to slow the melting and extend the flavor.

Savor responsibly.

T H E P E R F E C T D I Y C O C K TA I L Or if you prefer, join us at Artisan Waterfront Restaurant & Tavern for an elegant dinner, and see our mixologist in action.

615 EAST FRONT STREET, TRAVERSE CITY, MI. 49686 231 -947-3700 • DELAMAR.COM

National Writers Series WE’RE BACK AT THE CITY OPERA HOUSE! and excited to welcome acclaimed Michigan author

ELLEN AIRGOOD in conversation with guest host Susan Odgers

S

Not all robots are evil or a reflection of our technological fears. And not all movies set in the near-future have to represent a vision of either a dystopia or a utopia. That After Yang does not fall neatly into any of these above sci-fi tropes tells you a lot about what you can expect from this lovely and warm futuristic wonder. Korean American writer/director Kogonada, he of the beautiful gem of a film Columbus (IYKYK) and his cinephile video essays, is on the record as being heavily influenced by the work of revered Japanese filmmaker Yasujirō Ozu. His latest film is very much in the same vein of the great director’s meditative and acutely observed filmmaking that packs an emotional wallop, unexpectedly working its way into your very soul.

Torch the orange wheel to release oils and smokiness. Place as garnish.

“moving and brave.”

by meg weichman

— People

et against the wide open beauty of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula, Tin Camp Road is a wise, big hearted novel in which a young single mother and her ten-year-old daughter stand up to the trials of rural poverty. • A Michigan Notable Book • UP Notable Book Award

Event Sponsors: Bubbling Babes Book Club; Michigan Technological University Literary Sponsor: Michigan Writers

THURSDAY, MARCH 24 • 7 PM

Tickets at NationalWritersSeries.org 18 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

While the film doesn’t use flashy methodology in bringing to life this touching tale adapted from the short story “Saying Goodbye to Yang” by Alexander Weinstein, it does open with one heck of a dazzling dance sequence as a family competes in a massive virtual dance competition. It is the best dance sequence in an android-themed film since Oscar Isaac in Ex Machina (again, IYKYK). Said family consists of loose-leaf tea shop owner Jake (Colin Farrell, at the height of his melancholy powers), working mom Kyra (Jodie Turner-Smith), Chinese adopted daughter Mika (Malea Emma Tjandrawidjajazu), and “big brother” Yang (Justin H. Min). Yang isn’t really a member of the family. And he isn’t even really human. He’s a refurbished “technosapien” Jake got a deal on and was purchased to help Mika connect to her birth culture. Though there to basically deliver “Chinese fun facts,” Yang ends up fulfilling a more important role. So, one day when Yang malfunctions, Mika is not just upset—she’s practically despondent. Jake races to try and fix the out-of-warranty Yang, and after several failed attempts to revive him, Jake begins to realize just how much Yang was part of the fabric of the family. Jake then connects with a technology museum curator (Sarita Choudhury) who informs him she can access Yang’s core memories for Jake to view, and from these beautiful and poetic “clips” comes a very organic mystery: a reoccurring figure (Kogonada collaborator Hadley Lu Richardson) in the visions Jake does not recognize. Though Yang’s memories are fleeting, they are something to savor—a parable of memory, grief, and relationships. This is a film that whispers and never yells, like some sort of cinematic ASMR. And it is told with deliberate and delicate compositions: every shot, every design element, every frame, are all meticulous. In crafting this version of our near-future, Kogonada offers one where technology is not necessarily at odds with nature. It’s a future that, while austere and minimalist and far from perfect, is also warm and airy and beautifully complements the film’s tender and thoughtful exploration of what it means to be human. The story isn’t about figuring out what happened to Yang, or what or who Yang exactly is, but about discovering and trying to understand his interior life. And through that, Yang becomes a vessel for understanding ourselves and our humanity in an open and inviting way. This is a film on the more cerebral and intellectual side, yet not in an unapproachable, heady sci-fi way. Slow and sometimes

AFTER YANG meandering, this is the kind of film that might not ignite excitement in every viewer, but even if it loses you somewhere along the way, its emotional power will creep up and surprise you. Just as Jake chooses to toil with his bespoke tea leaves over faster, crystalized instant packets, the true depth of After Yang’s poignancy might not fully hit until well after you finished watching. And it is worth the wait. With a certain coziness at its core, After Yang manages to soothe spirits while also asking some of the biggest and most impossible to answer questions. And with so much noise in our society causing anxiety and unease, by going back to storytelling basics, it offers an astonishing balm for our modern tensions we didn’t know we needed.

the BATMAN Director Matt Reeves (Cloverfield) sends a clear (bat) signal he’s going for something far grittier with this latest incarnation of the caped crusader. And not only is this film grungier than recent DCEU takes on the character (see also that Nirvana fueled soundtrack), it also isn’t that much of a superhero movie, instead leaning more into the realm of epic crime saga. Shaking up Batman’s (Robert Pattinson) regular routine of busting skulls after dark is the Halloween night murder of Gotham’s Mayor. Detective Jim Gordon (Jeffrey Wright) brings Batman into the investigation as the killer left behind puzzles and clues for Batman, all in the name of uncovering the corruption at the heart of the city that may even involve the Wayne family. Topping out at around three hours, the story is complex, but not in an overstuffed or indulgent way. Even though at times it can drag, one of the best features is just how unhurried and unbothered this film is by doing anything other than telling the story it wants to tell. Liberated from the blockbuster formula, the action set pieces are restrained, used judiciously, and favor procedural elements over explosions. That is until the third act, when it seems studio pressures prevailed and the drama goes up a notch while the film’s sense of confidence crumbles.


Grand Traverse & Kalkaska DELAMAR, TC ARTISAN WATERFRONT RESTAURANT & TAVERN: 6-9: 3/20 -- Big Rand 3/24 -- Chris Smith 3/27 -- Rhett & John LOWER LOBBY: 7-10: 3/19 & 3/26 -- Drew Hale 3/25 -- Adam Dennis ENCORE 201, TC 3/19 -- Jon Archambault Band, 9-11 3/24 -- Windy Ridge Trio Jazz Band, 7-11:45 3/25 -- The Pistil Whips, 7-11:45 3/26 -- Drag Show, 8-11:45 KILKENNY’S, TC 3/25-26 -- Broom Closet Boys, 9:30 LEFT FOOT CHARLEY, TC THE BARREL ROOM: 3/21 -- Barrels & Beats w/ Rob

Coonrod, 6-9 LIL BO, TC Thurs. – Jazz w/ Larz Cabot, 6-9 Fri. – Live music Sun. -- Karaoke - Shooting Star Entertainment, 8 MIDDLECOAST BREWING CO., TC 3/25 -- Tony Halchak, 6-9 ROVE ESTATE VINEYARD & WINERY, TC 3/25 -- Sam & Bill, 5-8 TC COMEDY CLUB, TC 3/25 -- Comedy with Ian Bagg, 7:30 & 10 3/26 – Comedy with Ian Bagg, 7 & 9:30 THE GT CIRCUIT, TC 3/27 -- Jazz (Late) Brunch Featuring East Bay Drive, 3 THE PARLOR, TC 8-11:

3/19 -- Jazz Cabbage 3/22 -- Jesse Jefferson 3/23 -- Wink Solo 3/24 -- Jimmy Olson 3/25 -- Chris Smith 3/26 -- Drew Hale

ETHANOLOGY, ELK RAPIDS 3/19 -- St. Patrick’s Celebration w/ Bard Jim Ribby, 5-6; & Music w/ John Richard Paul, 8-11

HELLO VINO, BELLAIRE 3/25 -- Rick Woods, 6-9 3/26 -- Doc Woodward, 7-9 MAMMOTH DISTILLING, BELLAIRE 3/19 -- Clint Weaner, 7:30-10:30

BOYNE VALLEY VINEYARDS, PETOSKEY 2-6: 3/19 -- Chris Calleja 3/26 -- Tyler Parkin

Singer and guitarist Tai Drury from The Marsupials and Distant Stars plays The Beau in Cheboygan on Sat., March 26 at 7:30pm.

UNION STREET STATION, TC 3/19 -- The Brothers Crunch, 10 3/20 -- Karaoke, 10

Leelanau & Benzie

3/19 -- The Rolling Dirty, 8-10:30 3/20 & 3/27 -- Sunday Vibes Sessions w/ Local DJs, 2-5 3/25 -- Randy Reszka, 8-11 3/26 -- Seth Bernard, 8-10:30

SHORT’S BREW PUB, BELLAIRE

BEL LAGO VINEYARD & WINERY, CEDAR 3/19 -- Blair Miller, 5-7

DICK’S POUR HOUSE, LAKE LEELANAU Sat. -- Karaoke, 10-1

CICCONE VINEYARD & WINERY, SUTTONS BAY 3/19 -- North Bay Celtic Band, 2:30-5 3/24 -- Live From The Hilltop - Open Mic Edition, 6-9 Thu -- SnowGood Thursdays w/ Open Mic, 6-9

LAKE ANN BREWING CO. 6:30-9:30: 3/19 -- Two Third’s Coast 3/25 -- Brett Mitchell 3/26 -- Chris Skellenger & Paul Koss

3/25 -- Ben Drantol, 7:30 3/26 -- Tai Drury, 7:30

ODAWA CASINO RESORT, PETOSKEY VICTORIES, 10: 3/19 -- Scarkazm 3/26 -- Vertigo

THE HIGHLANDS AT HARBOR SPRINGS ZOO BAR: 3/19 -- Michelle & Pete, 4

LITTLE RIVER CASINO RESORT, MANISTEE 3/19 -- The Sixties Sound Featuring Micky Dolenz & The Fab Four, 8

Otsego, Crawford & Central

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FOOD & DRINK SPECIALS

STORMCLOUD BREWING CO., FRANKFORT 3/19 -- Tim Jones, 4; Lynn Callihan, 7 3/26 -- Blair Miller, 7

BENNETHUM’S NORTHERN INN, GAYLORD 3/22 -- Randy Reszka, 5-8

THE BEAU, CHEBOYGAN 3/19 -- Blake Elliott, 7

FRIDAY FISH FRY

ST. AMBROSE CELLARS, BEULAH 6-9: 3/19 -- Jesse Jefferson 3/25 -- Andy Lynn & John G 3/26 -- Sean Miller

Manistee, Wexford & Missaukee

CITY PARK GRILL, PETOSKEY 3/25 -- Annex Karaoke, 10

All you can eat perch

Send Nitelife to: events@traverseticker.com

THIRSTY FISH SPORTS GRILLE, TC 3/22 -- Tuesday Trivia, 7-9 3/27 -- Music Bingo, 6-8

Emmet & Cheboygan BEARDS BREWERY, PETOSKEY 3/19 -- The Real Ingredients, 6-8 3/20 -- Owen James, 5 3/26 -- Owen James Trio, 6 3/27 -- Jeffrey Schlehuber, 5-7

edited by jamie kauffold

THE WORKSHOP BREWING CO., TC 3/19 -- DJ Ras Marco, 12-2pm; Botala, 7pm 3/21 -- Here: Say, 7 3/22 -- Open Mic, 7 3/23 -- Jazz Show, 6 3/25 -- Stonefolk, 7 3/26 -- DJ Ras Marco D, noon2pm; Clark After Dark, 7

Antrim & Charlevoix CELLAR 152, ELK RAPIDS 3/25 -- Blair Miller, 6:30

nitelife

mar 19 - mar 27

DRINK SPECIALS (3-6 Monday-Friday): $2 well drinks, $2 domestic drafts, $2.50 domestic bottles, $5 Hornitos margarita SUNDAY - $6 Ketel One Bloody Mary & $4 Mimosas DAILY FOOD SPECIALS (3-6pm): Monday - $1 chips and salsa Tuesday - $1 enchiladas Thursday - $5 fried veggies (cauliflower or mushrooms) Friday - $5 hot pretzels w/ beer cheese

MARCH MADNESS IS BACK!

221 E State St. - downtown TC

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 19


the ADViCE GOddESS Muzzle-Bound

Q

“Jonesin” Crosswords "PR Stunts"--it sounds almost the same. by Matt Jones

ACROSS 1. Venus’s sister 7. Have a copy of 10. Adult ed. course, often 13. 1950 Isaac Asimov novel 14. Hanoi bowlful 15. Pad kee mao cuisine 17. Melon liqueur 18. Heavily promote the top of the house? 20. Inhabitants of a necklace fastener? 22. Had food 23. Soothing plants 24. “___ Beso” 25. 1055, to ... someone who knows Roman numerals 27. Campus in Troy, NY 28. Top-left square 29. Smoke detector chirp, after getting fixed? 35. Verizon’s onetime in-flight calling system 36. Trademarked Intel chip 40. Transportation for when you have to jump to avoid burning your burger? 42. ___ Moines, Iowa 44. 1991 Naughty by Nature hit 45. 2.0 GPA 46. It’s often served with rice 47. ___ New Guinea 50. Pose questions 52. Users who post about a group of Boy Scouts, then upvote it? 56. Delicacy in the cookbook “Fried Food for Felines”? 57. Pablo Picasso’s designer daughter 59. Musical Myra 60. “Fight of the Century” contender 61. “Baba ___” (The Who classic) 62. Prefix with -phyte or -lithic 63. “___-haw!” 64. Edges (along)

DOWN 1. Kind of card in a smartphone 2. Actor Bana 3. Tennis’s Australian “Rocket” 4. German torpedo craft of WWII 5. Ancient Scandinavians 6. “Let me give you ___” 7. Daughter of Polonius in “Hamlet” 8. “___ serious?” (“The Dark Knight” quote) 9. Three Little Kittens’ punishment (I mean, that sounds pretty dire if you really wanted it!) 10. Raison d’___ 11. “___ Jump” (manga magazine since 1968) 12. “Tao Te Ching” philosopher 16. “Based on that ...” 19. Rolling Stone staffers, for short 21. Wu Tang member, e.g. 25. CEO’s degree, possibly 26. Fragrant garland 27. “General Hospital” Emmy winner Sofer 28. It forms part of the Poland-Germany border 30. Cpl.’s inferiors 31. “Ruh-___!” 32. Gel pack kin 33. Take a sickle to 34. ‘70s prog rock supergroup, for short 37. Prank that’s never gonna give you up? 38. Honorary poem 39. “Born,” in some notices 41. It stands out against a standard dress shirt 42. English illusionist/mentalist Brown 43. Plaza Hotel girl of fiction 46. Do art on glass 47. Barely audible, in music notation 48. Assortment 49. “Positive thinking” advocate Norman Vincent ___ 50. Pong maker 51. Tried-and-true 53. ___ buco (Italian dish) 54. NASDAQ debuts 55. “Hook” sidekick 58. Cries heard in Tejano music

20 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

: My wife and I got married eight months ago. Whatever I suggest for the apartment — a paint color, a bathroom fixture — my wife immediately dismisses. For example, the living room couch she wanted was too huge for the space: a really awkward, uncomfortable fit. She kept ignoring objective facts about spatial relations -- even after I pulled out a measuring tape and drew a schematic of the room. It occurred to me that her wanting it her way and ignoring my ideas are patterns in our relationship. This feels pretty bad. — The Husband

A

: There are those of us with special abilities in certain areas. Personally, I have a multi-decade track record in two areas: as a writer and as an automotive moron. (Lift your hood and I’ll identify all the parts: “There’s that round thingie and a bunch of intestine-esque tube-y thingies...”) Hiring me to write something (ideally for dump trucks of money) suggests you have fabulous taste and superior intelligence. Hiring me to fix your car suggests you lack the mental firepower to pick your nose without assistance.

BY Amy Alkon evolved sex differences in spatial ability. However, you mention that her unwillingness to listen to you is a pattern in various areas of your relationship. And that’s a major problem. Being ignored -- especially by those who matter most to us -- takes a bite out of our dignity. Contrast that with somebody giving us their attention -- their full attention (meaning listening like we’re about to tip them off on tomorrow’s winning lotto numbers). They’re telling us they respect us. Whatever we have to say is important for them to hear. That kind of listening doesn’t just come from the ears. Psychologist Carl Rogers, who used it with his therapy clients, described it as “active listening” and explained: “I hear the words, the thoughts, the feeling tones, the personal meaning, even the meaning that is below the conscious intent of the speaker.” Listening deeply like this starts with setting aside the impulse to “win” — to hammer another person with what you believe. Admittedly, that can be a highly successful tactic — if you’re looking to persuade someone to bolt themselves even more tightly to their position.

Men and women, in general, have different spatial abilities — in line with the sexual divisions of labor in the ancestral huntergatherer world: male hunters tracking and killing animals and female gatherers doing the “grocery shopping” 2 million-ish years before grocery stores.

Listening is a vital element of a healthy relationship — one in which spouses accept each other’s “influence,” explains marriage researcher John Gottman. This means each spouse makes the other a “partner” in their decision-making: respecting and honoring them and their opinions and feelings. For a marriage to thrive, spouses have to “share the driver’s seat.”

Psychologists Irwin Silverman and Marion Eals find that women, across cultures, are vastly better than men — even 60 or 70% better — at “object location.” This is the ability to remember an array of objects in a setting, as well as their placement (relative to the other objects) -- basically by pulling up a mental snapshot: “Those nice berries by the cliff; poison ivy near the river -- by the dead tree where I found those yummo beetle appetizers.”

For your marriage to have a chance at thriving, your wife needs to see the benefit in acting as a “we” instead of pressing forward as a “me” (with a large piece of husband-shaped luggage). The direct approach — telling her she needs to change — is likely to be a fail, coming off as a threat to her getting her way and thus triggering not change but rebellion. Instead, tell her how you feel. (For example: hurt, disrespected, and embarrassed that your opinions seem of no interest to her.)

Men, on the other hand, are significantly better at “mental rotation”: turning a 3-D object around in their mind and predicting how the object would fit in a certain space — or hurtle through it. This skill allows the outfielder to catch the pop fly, but for Joe Loincloth, being ace at aiming his spear meant his family might dine on wildebeest mignon instead of mealymouthed excuses.

This should evoke her empathy — meaning make her feel bad that you feel bad — which could motivate her to take steps to change (which, by the way, would involve time, practice, and setbacks). Ultimately, she knows being a marital bully is way out of line — assuming her wedding vows didn’t include: “I promise to love, honor, support, blah, blah, blah — uh, providing my husband shuts his complainy yap about having to scale the Couch Alps whenever he wants to grab a beer out of the fridge.”

Granted, your wife — like most people — is probably not clued in to the wonders of


lOGY

MARCH 21- MARCH 27 BY ROB BREZSNY

ARIES (March 21-April 19): The Carib people from Surinam

quote their mysterious Snake Spirit as follows: “I am the force of the spirit of the lightning eel, the thunder ax, the stone. I am the force of the firefly; thunder and lightning have I created.” I realize that what I’m about to say may sound far-fetched, but I suspect you will have access to powers that are comparable to the Snake Spirit’s in the coming weeks. In fact, your state of being reminds me of how Aries poet Marge Piercy expressed her quests for inspiration: “When I work, I am pure as an angel tiger, and clear is my eye and hot my brain and silent all the whining grunting piglets of the appetites.”

LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): It’s the start of the Listening Season for you Libras. I propose a full-on celebration of listening: a three-week Holiday of Paying Close Attention to Important and Interesting Words Being Said in Your Vicinity. Make yourself a magnet for useful revelations. Be alert for the rich information that becomes available as you show the world you would love to know more of its secrets. For inspiration, read these quotes. 1. You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time. —M. Scott Peck. 2. Learn to listen. Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly. —my friend Jenna. 3. Listening is being able to be changed by the other person. —Alan Alda. 4. If you want to be listened to, you should put in time listening. —Marge Piercy. 5. Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold. —Karl A. Menninger.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Worry doesn’t

count as preparation,” writes author Lily Akerman. That sounds wise, but I don’t think it’s true in all cases. At its best, worrying may serve as a meditation that helps us analyze potential problems. It prompts us to imagine constructive actions we might take to forestall potential disruptions—and maybe even prevent them from erupting into actual disruptions. I bring these thoughts to your attention, Scorpio, because now is an excellent time to engage in this kind of pondering. I declare the next three weeks to be your Season of Productive Worrying.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If I had

my way, you’d be a connoisseur of kisses in the coming weeks. You’d make it your intention to expand your repertoire of kissing styles and ask willing partners to do the same. You would give and receive unwieldy kisses, brave kisses, and mysterious kisses. You would explore foolish, sublime kisses and sincere but inscrutable kisses and awakening kisses that change the meaning of kisses altogether. Are you interested in pursuing this challenge? It will be best accomplished through unhurried, playful, luxurious efforts. There’s no goal except to have experimental fun.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “Anybody

who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days,” wrote author Flannery O’Connor. Her observation may be a bit of an exaggeration, but not much. And I’m offering it to you now, as you begin a phase when you can glean many new teachings about your childhood—insights that could prove handy for a long time to come. I encourage you to enjoy a deep dive into your memories of your young years. They have superb secrets to divulge.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Creativity

is the power to connect the seemingly unconnected,” said author William Plomer. I agree with that. And I’m pleased to let you know that in the coming weeks, you will have more of this power to connect than you’ve had in a long time. I hope you will use it to link your fortunes to influences that inspire you. I hope you will wield it to build bridges between parts of your world that have been separate or alienated until now. And I hope you will deploy your enhanced capacity for blending and joining as you weave at least one magnificent new creation.

PISCES

(Feb 19-March 20): “I use my intelligence to discover more ways of appreciating you,” author Piscean Anaïs Nin told her lover Henry Miller. In the coming weeks, I recommend you activate a similar ambition. Now is a time when you can enhance your close relationships with important allies by deepening your

insight into them. What magic is at play within them that you haven’t fully recognized before? How could you better see and understand their mysteries? PS: You may be pleased when your deepening vision of them prompts them to extend the same favor toward you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “It’s always

too early to quit,” wrote cheerful author Norman Vincent Peale, who first popularized the idea of “positive thinking.” I’m an optimistic person myself, but I think his advice is excessively optimistic. On some occasions, it’s wise to withdraw your energy from a project or relationship you’ve been working on. Struggling to find relevance and redemption may reach a limit. Pushing ever onward might be fruitless and even harmful. However, I don’t think that now is one of those times for you, Taurus. According to my reading of the astrological omens, it is too early for you to quit.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “You can be

as earnest and ridiculous as you need to be, if you don’t attempt it in isolation.” So says author Barbara Kingsolver. She adds, “The ridiculously earnest are known to travel in groups. And they are known to change the world.” In my view, this is perfect advice for you right now. If you and the members of your crew focus on coordinating your efforts, you could accomplish blazing amazements in the coming weeks. You may solve riddles that none of you has been able to decipher alone. You can synergize your efforts in such a way that everyone’s individual fate will be lifted up.

CANCER

(June 21-July 22): About 200 years ago, poet William Wordsworth wrote, “Every great and original writer must himself create the taste by which he is to be relished.” Now I’ve come up with a variation on that wisdom: “Every great and original soul must herself create the taste by which she is to be understood and appreciated.” That’s what I hope you will work on in the coming weeks, Cancerian: fostering an ambiance in which you can be even better understood and appreciated. You now have extra power to teach people how to value you and get the best out of you.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22): “I hate housework!” complained comedian Joan Rivers. “You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again.” I wish I could give you a six-month reprieve from having to attend to those chores, Leo. In fact, I’d love it if I could permanently authorize you to avoid all activities that distract you from thinking big thoughts and feeling rich emotions and pursuing expansive adventures. But I’m afraid I can only exempt you from the nagging small stuff for just the next three weeks or so—four, tops. After that, you’ll have to do the dishes and make the beds again. But for the foreseeable future: Focus your energy on thinking big thoughts and feeling rich emotions and pursuing expansive adventures!

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): A British plumber

named Kev Crane worked for weeks to install a new bathroom at a private home. As he toiled, he passed the time by singing his favorite songs. He didn’t know that the homeowner, Paul Conneally, was the owner of a music label. So he was surprised and delighted when Conneally offered him a deal to record an album in the label’s studio. There may be a comparable development in your life during the coming weeks, Virgo. You could be noticed in new ways for what you do well. Your secret or unknown talents may be discovered or revealed. You might get invitations to show more of who you really are. Be alert for such opportunities.

Bringing Families Together Make memories on the water with your dream boat from Action Water Sports in Traverse City.

611 Olesons Commerce Dr., Traverse City, MI 49685 • (231) 943-3434 • actionwater.com

Northern-Express-Quarter .indd 1

9:57:02 AM Northern Express Weekly • march8/11/2021 21, 2022 • 21


NORTHERN EXPRESS

CLA SSI FIE DS DAN’S AFFORDABLE HAULING: Hauling junk, misc, yard debris, estate sales, forclosures, heavy demo. Free estimates. (231)620-1370 _____________________________________ SEWING, ALTERATIONS, Mending & Repairs. Maple City, Maralene Roush 231-228-6248 _____________________________________ RELIEVE STRESS, ANXIETY, PAIN: Board certified Shiatsu Therapist now accepting new clients under CDC protocols at 820 W.Front St. TC. American Organization Bodywork Therapies of Asia. Change happens 231.668.1029 _____________________________________ ADHD/DIVERGENT MIND?: Instead, learn why your child may be twice-exceptional and the genius of tomorrow. Visit Herth Hall 401 River St. Monday, March 28th at 6:00 pm for Food, Prizes & The hidden truth. _____________________________________ EASTER CRAFT & VENDOR SHOW: 10am3pm. Ellison Place-Gaylord. Crafters & Vendors bringing you Special Items for Easter! www. facebook.com/events/2398796816919646. No entry fee. Easter Bunny will be in the house

doing pictures. Tickets available online at https:// northernmievents.ticketleap.com/picture-withthe-easter-bunny. More events coming, go to www.facebook.com/NorthernMIevents. _____________________________________ CAREGIVER NEEDED: Seeking part-time, independent caregiver for older gentleman, TC. 231-620-6793 _____________________________________ GREENHOUSE & FARM FLEX SCHEDULE 20-40 HOURS AVAIL: family farm 20 years growing specialty produce. hiring now. year round or seasonal. use hand tools to plant, weed, harvest, prepare beds. $15/hr with monthly review/raise. weekly paycheck. gas allowance. 20 miles south of meijers. to discuss text 231 649 2763 _____________________________________ SERVERS, BARTENDERS, BUSSER, COOKS, HOSTS: The Traverse City Country Club is hiring! Seeking experienced front and back of the house staff for the club house and the pool. Hard-working, but new to the industry? We will train! Flexible schedule, generous pay, free golf and staff meals included! Join our team! Call 231.947.9140 or email Concierge@tcgcc.com

HOME HEALTH WORKERS NEEDED (NORTHERN MICHIGAN): We are looking for caring and skilled Home Health Aides, CNA’s, MA’s and LPN/RN/BSN. Come join our growing professional and caring team. We have a need for full and part time caregivers all over Northern Michigan. If you are a caring and dependable home health care professional please submit application online at WWW.GLHCU.COM or call 231-668-4171. _____________________________________ PAID JOB TRAINING FOR 55+ Part-time positions waiting to be filled. Paid job training for qualifying seniors. Must be unemployed, seeking work and meet program guidelines. You will earn while you train on the job. For more information contact AARP Foundation SCSEP Program, 231-252-4544. Serving Grand Traverse and other Northern Michigan Counties. Call to find out more. _____________________________________ HIRING SALES ASSOCIATES We are looking for energetic sales associates for our Front Street location. Experience is helpful but not necessary. Sales associate Job requires active selling of our oils, vinegar, and pantry items, filling and restocking products, and ringing up

sales. Our guest and customer service will be the most important part of your job. Fustini’s offers; Hiring bonus, Quarterly bonuses, BCBS after 60 Days( for full-time employees), Simple IRA, Product discount, Free parking, Free cooking classes. Wage is $15- $16 (231) 944-1145

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22 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly

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M E N TO RS H I P M AT T E RS This year, the 7th Annual Big Little Hero Race is raising awareness for the need of local mentors within our community.

7TH ANNUAL

SATURDAY APRIL 23 2022

We believe every child deserves a hero. Through our partnership with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northwestern Michigan and NMC’s College for Kids, we are striving to make that belief a reality. All proceeds from this year’s race will sponsor scholarships for local Littles to attend College for Kids at NMC!

To volunteer, sponsor, or register to race visit:

BIGLITTLEHERORACE.COM

Northern Express Weekly • march 21, 2022 • 23


24 • march 21, 2022 • Northern Express Weekly


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