O&AN | November 2014

OUTANDABOUT NASHVILLE.COM

NOVEMBER 2014 VOLUME 13 | ISSUE 11

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11 YEARS

OF LGBT NEWS

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Chuck Wolfe Stepping Down as Victory Fund CEO

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Nashville Businesses reach out to LGBT Clientele

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Francesco da Rimini (Master of the Blessed Clare of Rimini). The Adoration of the Magi (detail), (detail), ca. 1340. Tempera on wood, 22 3/4 x 23 3/8 in. Collection of the Lowe Art Museum, University of Miami, Gift of the Samuel H. Kress Foundation, 61.018.000

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11.14

Wedding Announcement Jerry Jones and Benjamin Camarena Garcia On September 30, 2014, Jerry Jones, publisher of Out and About Nashville, married his partner Benjamin Camarena Garcia at a private ceremony in Springfield, Illinois.

The wedding was performed by Judge Esteban F. Sanchez, with friends Brian Williamson and Christopher Mohnani present as witnesses.

Jones and Garcia are another success story for modern dating technology! “We met more than a year ago on the app called ‘Hornet,’ Jones explained. “Benja wanted to go out and pursued me for about three months before I would say yes. I was hesitant because of his age. But when we finally met in person, our personalities just clicked instantly.”

The couple got engaged on July 22, 2014, Benjamin’s birthday, while they were on vacation at Universal Studios. “We had talked and talked about building our lives together,” Jones said, “and getting married was just the logical next step. I have often heard of people saying that they just ‘knew’ that the person and time was right, and we both knew it was time to move forward and make that commitment. We are best friends, we’ve built a great relationship on trust and communication, and we were ready to make that commitment and pledge to each other.”

The couple held a small ceremony in Nashville on November 1 at the Hilton Garden Inn, with the Reverend Raye Nell Dyer officiating.

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Out & About Nashville welcomes volunteer writers, photographers and videographers throughout the year. If you’re interested in contributing to our publication, send an email to editor@outandaboutnashville.com with a resume, contact information and samples of your work if available.

Our volunteer staff is unpaid, but contributors do receive credit for their work in our print publication and online. Those seeking an internship in journalism or mass communications are strongly encouraged to apply.

LEGAL Dear Out and About Nashville readers, we would love to receive photos and announcements for other Middle Tennessee LGBTQ weddings or engagements. While we cannot guarantee print placement for every submission, we look forward to sharing your joy with our readers. @jamesallengrady

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Soldier of CHANGE

BY KEVEN LEWIS

By reflecting on defining moments in his process of self discovery, Major Steve Snyder-Hill weaves the tale of the journey that would lead culminate with him taking a stand for equality.

Many may remember Major Snyder-Hill as the ‘Booed Soldier’ of the 2011 Republican Primary. This event spring-boarded Major Snyder-Hill to the role of the voice of gay and lesbian soldiers who, through

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into the truly powerful moments of his amazing journey, it rings true.

Where Soldier of Change finds its real power, though, is through the openness and honesty with which it presents the concerns of the LGBT+ community and its supporters. We are drawn in as the pages verbalize our own internal fears, the struggle to accept our own identities, or, in many years of shaming and fear, were silenced under the cases, the attempts to hide them. We see the fear of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell (DADT) policy. being accepted, and of course, even more so the fear Through his memoir, Soldier of Change, Major of being rejected. Snyder-Hill gives voice to realities Snyder-Hill bravely opens his own closet door that the LGBT+ community faces on a daily basis in in ways that would make many gay men—even such a way that it seems as though our own lives have openly gay men—apprehensive. He reveals his own somehow been immortalized and shared through the struggles as a young man dealing with questions pages of his book. about his sexuality, as This book does well as conflicts he faced more than present the during his first tour of duty reader with a good or “There are moments in your at age twenty, detailing the even an inspirational life that permanently scar you. challenges and victories story: it encourages us to A fraction of a second, one word that came with coming to become co-authors and someone says that you will hold in terms with his sexuality. interlocutors, lending our your memory until the day you die.

It is clear that DADT own voices—our own had a profound impact This day was about one of them. unique and powerful on his personal and ‘You don’t take it up the ass, do stories—to the fight for professional life, as well as you?’ equality. We, too, are called on the lives of those around It’s funny, but I wasn’t even to inspire and change the him, as he was essentially offended at the time—because I hearts and minds of others. required to lie to wear didn’t.

I kept telling myself, I am In this way, stories have a the uniform. He takes the not one of them.

He was directly strange power. They evoke reader along on his second the strongest memories asking me if I was gay, but I wasn’t tour, twenty years after his and emotions. They pull anywhere near ready to even admit first, when, in an instant, us into the lives of others: that to myself, let alone anyone he came out to the world, their fears become our own. else” (16). giving a face to gay men We feel their sorrow and and women in uniform. their joy. We revel in their Events culminate as success and mourn their he becomes an outspoken Soldier of Change. loss as though it were our advocate for gays and Stephen Snyder-Hill. own. We live a thousand lesbians in the military, Potomac Books: lives through the eyes of as well as their families.

University of Nebraska others. But, through words Press, 2014. 198 pages.

Major Snyder-Hill doesn’t such as those on his pages, stop there, as he and his we are challenged and husband continue to pursue inspired; we find strength and hope. social justice and equality under the law for all those “By having pride in yourself and your across the LGBT spectrum. community—and coming out and telling your story— In his memoir, Major Snyder-Hill reflects a you change lives” (184).

It is through telling our own profound honesty, and all is done with sensitivity and stories that we find the power to become our own care. When he injects humor or even deeper meaning communities’ soldiers of change.

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A.J. MARTIN ESTATE JEWELRY, ETC.

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After twenty-eight years in the business, A.J. Martin’s passion for antique and vintage jewelry still shines.

And according to Dustin Tittle, who has worked with Martin since 2010, “A.J.’s one of the least judgmental people I’ve ever met, and has had LGBT people in both her family and circle of friends since she was old enough to have either.” Tittle, a Vandy grad and a gay man, manages the shop, and he created and maintains their website and Etsy store.

Tittle’s progress from seasonal help in late 2010 to junior partner in the present is indicative of Martin’s openness toward LGBT people.

She gave Tittle a chance, though his background in history and art history might not have indicated this career path, but he said, “I have an appreciation for it because so many of the pieces in our store are literal works of art. Art Deco engagement rings, retro right hand rings, or more modern pieces, it doesn’t matter. They’re all so unique and different!”

They know LGBT couples in middle Tennessee don’t have a lot of options when it comes to openly LGBT-affirming jewelers. “We want them to know they can come here and not be judged. We just want to help people find the right piece of jewelry for them, or make it for them,” she said. In fact, Tittle and his partner, Matt Riddlehoover, just married, exchanging rings made by Martin.

Often LGBT couples arrive at their shop, not knowing how they’ll

be treated or whether they’ll be served at all: “They don’t clearly establish that they’re a couple,” Tittle explained, “until we either ask or it gets to the point where they can’t not tell us. There’s a timidity about it.”

The ice broken, the jewelers have the opportunity to provide a welcoming and affirming experience. “We develop a rapport with them and, in no time at all, they’ve gone from standoffish at best (or uncomfortable at worst) to relaxed. Buying an engagement ring, anniversary present, or birthday present for the person you love is stressful enough; you don’t need the added stress of having to hide who you are.”

Helping people find just the right piece to express their happiness is always gratifying, Tittle said. “The engagement ring is unlike almost anything else you’ll ever buy, because it—by definition—is something you intend to wear forever…. It’s symbolic of something that can’t be described.”

Looking at it conjures memories, and, unfortunately, for LGBT couples those memories might include the time a jeweler sneered at the idea of serving a couple ‘like them.’ ” That’s why it’s so important that businesses like A.J. Martin Estate Jewelry make a clear statement of affirmation: they’ll help and serve LGBT people with respect, doing nothing to mar the memory the day someone bought the perfect ring.

See http://www.ajmartinonline.com for more information.

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9

STUDIO NOVO Brings LAGREE METHOD to Nashville

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

BY JOSEPH BRANT

in their 20s who want quick and awesome results, and then it’s also great for older Prior to the opening of Studio Novo in West Nashville, just over a year ago, Anna people who may have knee issues or hip issues because it’s zero impact on the and Santi Tefel had searched far and wide, coast to coast for something new and joints, so it’s for men and women, it’s for athletes and non-athletes, it’s something unique in the fitness field. They knew they’d found what they were looking for that we felt like we could embrace and bring to Nashville.” when they discovered the Lagree Fitness Method.

It would appear they’ve succeeded. The West Nashville location has become “Anna and I come from an athletic background,” said Santi. “She played soccer in college and I played tennis in college, and we’re not 30 anymore, so so successful that the Tefels have opened a second location, this time in Cool obviously we can’t work out in the same way we were working out in college.” Springs. According to Anna, the West Nashville location hosts 7–8 classes per day, “That’s the reason we decided to bring this to Nashville,” added Anna, “because and in Cool Springs, “we’re working to build our clientele there, so as the demand picks up, we’ll be adding it’s unique and it appeals more classes and getting to everyone. It appeals to the point where we to every body type and “MOST GUYS ARE TURNED AWAY FROM THESE KINDS OF WORKOUTS BECAUSE have six to seven classes fitness level. Looking at a day there as well.” what’s out there in LA THEY THINK THAT IF THERE ARE NO WEIGHTS INVOLVED THEY WON’T BUILD O&AN’s Mike Moore and in NY, this one we MUSCLE, BUT THAT’S NOT THE CASE WITH THIS CLASS.” recently visited Studio just kept coming back Novo. “Being a guy who to because it’s such loves cardio, who does an amazing method.”

Bootcamp or CrossfitNamed for its inventor, Sebastien Lagree, the Lagree Fitness Method blends cardio, like workouts, and who lifts six days a week,” he said, “I knew that this style of a Pilates, and strength training within a single, 50-minute group workout. Each workout was going to be completely new to me. I am not a flexible guy at all and individual is provided a personal workstation (a “Megaformer” machine) I found it extremely difficult to do some of the workouts, which is a good thing! in which the participants are guided by a group leader through a series of Most guys are turned away from these kinds of workouts because they think that poses and movements that strengthen the body core while toning muscle. if there are no weights involved they won’t build muscle, but that’s not the case According to the New York Times, the Megaformer is “a wobbly with this class. You are locked in a single position with lots of resistance to stretch carriage that can be pushed and pulled, lunged on and squatted down to, the and build the muscle for minutes at a time. I was always told that the only way for machine challenges those atop it in ways that traditional Pilates may not.” your body to really change is to get out of your comfort zone and change out your “It’s appropriate for people of all ages,” said Anna. “It’s appealing to people workouts with things you have never done before.” Lagree certainly fits the bill.

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NOVEMBER 2014

THE

SLUMS OF PARADISE

BY JASON GORDON

According to the organization SPEAK, “Suicide is the leading cause of death among gay and lesbian youth, nationally” Around 30% of LGBT youth attempt suicide by age 15, and as many as 1,500 die each year.

Zechariah McBryde—a 37-yearold, self-taught filmmaker living in Nashville—has chosen to take action, combatting the phenomenon of suicide in the LGBT community by creating a new web series called The Slums of Paradise. He was inspired to do so after learning the sobering statistics in the media. When cases of LGBT suicide came to light, “There were just a lot of horrible reactions from adults, such as school administrators, that I felt were very inappropriate.

And the way that the news handled the situation was kind of horrible, so I wanted to create something that sort of let [the LGBT youth] know that they can get better now and they really do have a purpose. I wanted to play my part to help them realize that,” McBryde explained when asked about his motivation for this series.

The Slums of Paradise is set in Paradigm, a futuristic, religious dystopia experiencing an increasing number of youth suicides. Crooked mayor Giovanni Pius is doing nothing about the situation. Slums revolves around a young transgender girl, Shekinah. Thrown out of her home, she starts looking for a place of acceptance and finds Satellite, a club where the forgotten and cast-off can be themselves without fear. The pilot introduces a number of the series’ central characters, such as Abby Zoe, Giovanni’s spoiled daughter, and Paprika Simone, who rules the underground scene in the city.

The series is highly inspired by the well-known documentary Paris Is

Burning, which focuses on the African American, Latino, gay and transgender communities in New York City in the mid-to-late 1980s. McBryde says that a few of the characters are based on— and pay homage to—people we meet in Paris. For instance, McBryde’s Paprika Simone is based on one of the film’s many personalities, Pepper Labeija.

McBryde is currently working on the second episode, while promoting the series and raising funds to keep it going. “I have a lot of ideas that I wanna go really far with and have this be more than just a web series,” he said. “I really want to do something that’s different, that no one’s ever done before and have a positive impact on people.” McBryde hopes his series brings more attention the LGBT youth suicide and emboldens viewers to act.

Slums also highlights the inadequate response of the media and public officials to this alarming trend and its underlying causes among LGBT youth.

For McBryde, the series is also a way to show that those experiencing hardship because of their sexual orientation are not alone and there are people who are rooting for them. In his description of the video, he explains, “My wish is to inspire, enlighten, and encourage all those who have felt ostracized by ignorance and hate; especially towards LGBT youth. You are not alone. You are loved. You are important. When someone tells you that you have no purpose in life; their purpose in life becomes motivation for you to prove them wrong.”

To view the pilot episode, visit McBryde’s YouTube channel at http:// tinyurl.com/lfcg9yg. More information about the series is available at http://www. theslumsofparadise.tumblr.com/.

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New Dialect

ELEVATES NASHVILLE’S CONTEMPORARY

DANCE SCENE

BY JAZ DORSEY

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Patricia Snyder Attorney-at-Law The Law Office of Patricia L. Snyder 2400 Crestmoor Road / Nashville TN 37215

One of the newest arts groups on the Nashville front is New Dialect, a company that is working to pioneer a new culture of contemporary dance in Music City. The company has an ambitious program offering professional development for dancers and choreographers, community workshops for those who have no previous dance experience, and world-class contemporary dance performances for local audiences at movie theater prices.

New Dialect was founded by Nashville native Banning Bouldin, who, at seventeen, moved to NYC to train as a dancer at Juilliard. After graduating in 2002, she went on to perform internationally throughout North America, Europe, and Russia before returning to Nashville in 2010.

What she found on her arrival was that the arts scene in Nashville had grown significantly since she had left but that it still lacked a contemporary-dance training and performance company. She then set out on a mission to provide the Nashville dance community with the kind of opportunities she had experienced abroad.

Since its inception in 2012, New Dialect has brought artists from around the world to Nashville to teach workshops and choreograph new dances for the company’s repertory. In August of this year, the company held its debut at OZ Nashville. The evening’s performance featured works by Ana Lucaciu, Banning Bouldin, and Idan Sharabi with live, original music by Russian composer Lev Zhurbin. Nearly 600 people attended the show—a record crowd for the venue—and the performance received rave reviews from both the press and the public.

Since its debut, New Dialect has been working to make a name for itself both on and off the stage. New Dialect was recently voted Nashville’s “Best New Dance Company” and “Best Alternative Fitness Class” by the readers of the Nashville Scene, and on October 28 the company’s dancers were

the opening act at the TEDx Nashville Salon mini-conference, CREO. The company has three upcoming performances this season: one on November 16 during the Frist Family Days Festival, and two on December 10 at Houston Station. The latter two shows will feature the creative work of internationally renowned Canadian choreographer Belinda McGuire, formerly a dancer with Gallim and the Limon Company, among others.

McGuire will be performing her own solo show—The Heist Project—in Nashville, and while here she will both create a new work for the dancers of New Dialect as well as teach a ten day Master Class through the company’s education program.

In May 2015, New Dialect will collaborate with OZ Nashville, Trisha Brown Dance Company and Zeitgeist Art Gallery to present Trisha Brown’s installation, “Planes.” New Dialect and dancers from the Trisha Brown Dance Company will perform the piece together every weekend during the month of May. Throughout the year, New Dialect will also continue to offer daily professional training, including Master Classes with such renowned guest artists as Belinda McGuire, Cindy Salgado, Peter Chu and others. Their community workshops include practices like Gaga/People, Alexander Technique, Contact Improvisation, Kinesiology and Dancing into Self-Integration.

These programs are designed to “allow members of the Nashville community to experience the emotionally and physically healing properties of dance: strengthening our bodies, sharpening our minds, and connecting us more deeply to ourselves and each other through movement.”

For more information about New Dialect’s cutting-edge, contemporary dance performances, as well as their educational programs, visit their website at http://www. newdialect.org/.

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13

A Life of Service after Holy Trinity

CINDY ANDREWS-LOOPER Wants to IGNITEURSOULNOW

BY JAMES GRADY Senior Pastor Cindy Andrews-Looper of Holy Trinity, one of Nashville’s most visibly LGBT-affirming congregations, recently resigned her post in order to embark on a new stage in her personal ministry. A two-month sabbatical this summer—her first in eighteen years in the ministry—helped her clarify her understanding of her calling. “My mind, soul, and spirit were able to relax and be quiet. In that quietness, I heard messages from God that I had been unable to hear before.

Looking back, I believe God had been trying to get my attention and give me new directions for some time. I was just too busy and burned out to really hear it.”

For many, walking away from a position she’d held for so long because of such a feeling might seem hard to grasp, but Andrews-Looper embraces

this uncertainty. “Looking back at the last 25 years of my life, my spiritual path has been characterized by steps of blind faith…. Every time I have been obedient, amazing blessings have followed.” This calling to a new ministry is, for her, one more opportunity to show such obedience.

Despite struggling with the decision “because this church is like [her] child,” Andrews-Looper says she isn’t worried about the church, and she’s taking a very hands-off approach to the transition. “I believe,” she declared, “God has equipped the staff and Vestry to provide the leadership needed in the moments.” She believes that the leadership, as well as the congregants, will step up. “I believe some of the most exciting and blessed days lie in Holy Trinity’s future!”

Her confidence in Holy Trinity has allowed Andrews-Looper to exit,

opening many new avenues for her future work. First, she is writing a book, “Truths My Christian Faith Did Not Teach Me,” which she plans to publish in 2015. “When we begin to live from the places of truth and freedom, rather than fear and control, we get in touch with who God really made us to be.” Embracing this freedom allows us, she says, “to live from a place of God’s abundance….”

Communicating this truth, which “the world desperately wants and needs to hear,” is central to her developing sense of mission.

Besides writing, another prime focus of her new ministry will be public speaking. “Once the book is published, I will have a book tour. I plan to offer podcasts of my sermons on the website, as well as a daily meditation and providing a place that individuals can submit prayer requests.”

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She also intends to engage her creative side, continuing to paint and work on developing projects such as a line of cards and other merchandise that incorporates humor and spiritual truths. “I think Christians can be some of the biggest sticks in the mud,” she explained. “I hope to bring a lighter side to spiritual truths. I believe humanity is longing for truths to which they can hold fast and from which they can find hope. I think humor is a great avenue in communicating these truths.”

Leaving Holy Trinity doesn’t mean Andrews-Looper is putting pastoral care behind her. “In the past 2–3 weeks, I have had some interesting opportunities to give hope and love to individuals who need it. Just today, I prayed with a little 7 year old boy whose mother gave him up for adoption….

I [recently] listened to a man who had just arrived tell me about losing his wife of 60+ years…. Each day I am praying that God will allow my path to cross individuals who need to feel love.”

She is also “continuing to officiate at weddings and funerals…and pet funerals and pet blessings. As you know, in our community, our pets are our children. When we lose them, it is like losing a dear family member. I provide pastoral care for those who are having to have their pets put to sleep, those who have lost a pet and those wanting some kind of service to remember their pets.”

Indeed, her plans are so out of the box that she’s bringing Ignite Your Soul Now with Pastor Cindy to Lipstick lounge on Sunday, December 7, at 9 a.m. The event promises to be “a humorous and charismatic presentation of practical spiritual truths to make life better.” Events like this would be perfect for “individuals who don’t really want to be part of a local congregation; but still desire uplifting and inspiring thoughts and truths for their lives.” Seems that now she’s not tied to a congregation, one never knows where she might turn up, spreading her message of love and acceptance.

However, information about Cindy AndrewsLooper’s developing ministry is always to be found at her website, www.igniteursoulnow.com. Those who may feel in need of her pastoral care services, or would like to discuss having her officiate weddings, funerals, or blessings may contact herat igniteursoulnow@gmail.com.

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NOVEMBER 2014

BY JAMES GRADY

November 11 is Veterans Day. In 1954, President Dwight Eisenhower issued a proclamation stating, “On that day let us solemnly remember the sacrifices of all those who fought so valiantly, on the seas, in the air, and on foreign shores, to preserve our heritage of freedom, and let us reconsecrate ourselves to the task of promoting an enduring peace so that their efforts shall not have been in vain.” But by 1954, the US military had a long history of failing to honor the sacrifices of many who fought valiantly, from African American to LGBT service people. It is radically clear that only in recent years has our country moved toward truly honoring all who have fought to protect it.

According to the U.S. Naval Institute, Lieutenant Gotthold Frederick Enslin was ordered “drummed out” of camp in “abhorrence and detestation” of his “infamous crimes” (sodomy) by none other than General George Washington. Over the decades, little has changed. Assistant Secretary of the Navy Franklin D. Roosevelt launched an anti-homosexual sting on the Navy in 1919, and by 1920 Congress modified the Articles of War to criminalize sodomy. In 1921, U.S. Army standards allowed a male to be ruled unfit for military service if he exhibited “stigmata of degeneration,” such as feminine characteristics, or “sexual perversion” (i.e. homosexual tendencies).

For decades, the military and its overseers in Congress as well as the executive branch entrenched and reinforced the stigma—and legal remedies—against homosexuals.

Countless men and women would be persecuted and eventually prosecuted, choosing not to reenlist or losing their rank and benefits to dishonorable discharges.

Legendary Nashville club owner Jerry Peek, for instance, served in 2020th Communications at Shaw AFB

L. Jennifer Ward, R. Jonathon Herndon in South Carolina in the early 1960s. He proudly recalled decoding “the message announcing the mobilization for Cuban Missile Crisis.” But Peek couldn’t see himself lasting: “My urges were getting much stronger, especially for one guy in particular, who I was very close to.

I know that he knew my feelings but it was never discussed.” It is impossible to estimate the cost resulting from “brain drain,” as qualified soldiers fled or were discharged from the military.

Bill Clinton’s election seemed to promise change, but Clinton ultimately lacked the political capital to deliver full LGBT inclusion. Instead, he signed on to “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT).

Ironically, President Clinton, who initially wanted LGBT equality in the military, attempted a compromise that he hoped would improve prospects for gays in the military, but that compromise led to the dismissal of over 13,000 soldiers.

How many more, like Peek, simply walked away, knowing they couldn’t hide forever?

Nashville residents Frank Moore (former Army, Legal Specialist) and Jonathon Herndon (retired Navy, Master at Arms) both enlisted prior to DADT. Both recalled signing documents swearing they weren’t homosexuals.

Herndon said, “I lied on the form…. I knew from an early age my sexuality, but

also felt I needed to serve my country.”

Nevertheless, knowing he could be discharged were that lie discovered was a source of lingering anxiety.

Moore, on the other hand, intensely recalled, “When I signed my enlistment paperwork [I had] that feeling of panic when I lied to the U.S. government and said I was not a homosexual.”

Both men were very secretive about their sexualities at first. “In the first few years,” Moore said, “I was very much closeted. Luckily in the Legal Corp the mindset was more liberal and I had friends I felt comfortable sharing my sexuality with, one or two people I could truly be myself with.”

Herndon let down his guard a bit more, though revealed less: “My experience changed during my career. I started taking people I was seeing to military events as dates, but still lied about who they were. I would say a friend or roommate, etc.”

Ultimately DADT, Herndon said, brought “more hunts, with the military looking more into people’s sexuality.

The policy seemed actually to open the door on learning personal things about service members and using that information for discharges.” Both men saw friends and acquaintances discharged.

An unintended effect was a kind of gay underground. “Traveling around the world,” Moore explained, “at different places there would be gay clubs. We would meet there, and then you know for sure that they are gay.” Once sexuality was confirmed, socializing quickly moved off site. “At that time we had to be very careful because the Army would send undercover officers into the gay clubs to see if there were soldiers there.” Increased monitoring and even witch hunts weren’t new tactics, as evidenced by Franklin Roosevelt’s 1919 navy sting. But they were throwbacks to an era thought past.

The psychic toll taken by the DADT culture was immense. “It was difficult to meet someone in a safe and above@O U T A N D A B O U T N A S H

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board manner,” Moore explained. “You kind of had to develop skills at sneaking around. Who I was and what I did sexually was basically illegal: that brings baggage.”

Jennifer Ward and Tristen Jackson both joined the military during the death throes of DADT. Ward was an active duty combat medic from 2008–2012, who deployed to Kirkuk, Iraq, from 2010–2011 as part of a security element that escorted government officials. DADT was so entrenched, she said, “I was very conscious of my sexuality in fear of reprisal.” Ward’s experience was doubly compounded: She was a female soldier in an active zone, as well as a lesbian.

Jackson, a helicopter mechanic, felt fear of reprisal, too, from a different source: “There were always soldiers making jokes about beating up queers. It made it impossible to completely trust anyone, even my own squad mates.” Like Ward’s, Jackson’s situation was further complicated.

“I was 17 when I enlisted,” he added, “but I was aware that I was not heterosexual. I also knew that I didn’t identify with the gender that I had been assigned at birth.” Being transsexual in the DADT military is difficult to imagine. “I didn’t want to risk anyone finding out that I was transgender or queer,” Jackson explained. “It made being deployed a miserable experience, and I spent most of the time angry and being a jerk to the guys in my squad.”

Both young soldiers were thus relieved when the policy was overturned. “Over time,” Ward reflected, “the military has become more accepting…. I felt extremely comfortable as the military grew and made strides to incorporate equality.” Jackson even got to enjoy some of the freedom Herndon felt when bringing a date to a military function. But, for Jackson, the day came when the lie wasn’t necessary: “After the repeal of DADT, I started to become more open about my personal relationships, and would bring dates to unit cookouts and events. Most of the people in my unit were accepting. After getting out of the military I … came out as transgender and started transitioning.”

Peek reflected on the more open and welcoming environment with something like amazement. “I really never thought I would see gays be able to be open about their sexual preferences. If it had come much sooner I probably would have had a career in the military!”

For Moore, who left the Army during the depths of DADT, the new freedoms soldiers can enjoy openly if they choose is refreshing. “I love the openness that post-DADT soldiers have. It’s wonderful … they are free to work and volunteer to better the LGBT community both on and off their bases and they are doing amazing work!”

The advances won by LGBT soldiers go hand in hand with those made by other groups. Herndon, who spent twenty-three years in the military, said, “I was able to personally view changes in the military for LGBT people, some good, some not so good. The most amazing changes I witnessed were women serving in more non-traditional roles Premiering last October, FX’s wrap and animal tooth necklaces will and President Obama’s repeal of DADT.” For Herndon, this is a sign of American Horror Story: Coven was one transform you into the perfect voodoo more sweeping social change. “We are seeing more and more acceptance of the most popular seasons of the hit priestess, Marie Laveau. Don’t forget in our country, and that is an amazing thing to witness and live through.” show to date. With so many characters a fake snake to help raise your army of Jackson, too, sees the advances of LGBT people in the military as to choose from, gaining inspiration for the dead. linked with social change. “I think the legalization of same sex marriage Halloween couldn’t be simpler.

And for Marie’s lover, the in so many states and service members being able to add their spouses For Fiona Goode, just think highMinotaur, well, a bull’s head or horns to their health insurance policies is amazing.” But for a former soldier— fashion black and accessorize with and ragged pants will suffice. No shirt and one who saw truly ingrained, institutional bigotry—nothing beats the more black: black gloves paired with required, or desired. little things. “The fact that a gay man can bring his boyfriend to a formal black shades, a small, black umbrella Spalding, the Academy’s servant, military ball without fear is amazing. The first time I saw a photo of a gay and you’re set. Don’t forget to bring a requires a creepy grey wig and dirty, couple at a military ball I cried like a baby.” cigarette for added effect, because, let’s long fingernails, paired with a butler’s face it, witch loved her smokes. outfit.

For Madam Delphine LaLaurie, And last, but certainly not least, for think 18th century socialite, slash Myrtle Snow, find your inspiration in serial killer: smear a little fake blood seventies chic, with loud bright patterns, on your face and you’re set. a crimped, frizzy red wig and cat eye A simple white Grecian dress glasses. wrapped with cloth bands, a head

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NOVEMBER 2014

In honor of HBO’s final season of True Blood and one of the show’s hottest characters, Eric Northman, grab a set of fake fangs and blood. Get your leather out and and leave the shirt at home.

BY FREDDIE JAE

The percentage of American men and women who take the oath to protect and defend the United States and the American way of life: 1%. These soldiers work day in and day out to ensure that our rights are protected.

The work is often long and grueling. Then there are the sacrifices. Giving their lives is the ultimate price they might pay for our freedoms. Rarely do we think of the extra sacrifices made closer to home.

The repeal of Department of Defense Directive 1304.26, “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” has brought about a great era in the advancement in the battle for service members’ equal rights. But there is a long way left to go.

As an Army soldier who has dealt with disappointment arising from military life, I wanted to see how my peers felt about the current battle for equality. Shianne Mack (Army Specialist, Active Duty, 22) and Erick Matthews (Army Specialist, Active Duty, 30) were willing to offer some insight into issues—particularly social—still facing LGBT service people, based on their own personal experiences.

O&A: Have you ever been discriminated against in a military setting because of your sexuality?

O&A: Now, you say you’ve never found any negativity towards your sexuality here at Ft. Campbell. Does your unit know?

Shianne: No. I don’t think anyone knows about my sexuality.

Erick: Yes.

Erick: I haven’t experienced it directly, but there was a time when I was in basic training…and the drill sergeant—who was our supposed Sexual Harassment/ Assault Response and Prevention (SHARP) representative—was giving us an informal chat on sexual harassment. Well, during his briefing, he paused for a moment and then continued on to say “effing faggots. You can’t trust em.”….You could tell that it was from his heart, because he paused, said it, paused again, then shook his head and continued on with what he was saying. At that point, I didn’t care what he had to say anymore: I was offended.

Shianne: Well, like I tell everyone, it’s none of their business. I mean people say to me, “Oh, you can tell me.” And I’m like, “Yeah, I probably could.” But that’s my personal life. That has nothing to do with my job performance, nor will it.

O&A: No, I totally understand. I would be, too. So, what did you do next?

O&A: So, you feel that if they knew, they would treat you differently?

Shianne: I don’t think they would, but secretly I feel like they would.

O&A: Do you think that’s because of a stigma in the military? Even after the repeal of DADT?

Shianne: Of course. Some people think that just because a man likes a man, that Erick: I removed myself from the situation…[and later] I went and spoke to our makes him less of a man. NO! Incorrect…. I disagree, but until we change the main drill sergeant…. So after our talk we went on to the Equal Opportunity (EO) mindset of the Army as a whole, we won’t get rid of that stigma.

Sergeant…. The EO sergeant’s superior, an E8, wanted the whole situation swept under the rug. He said, “This is something that could ruin someone’s career. This O&A: How do you feel about marriage equality and where it stands in the is a small slip up that could ruin his life. Get him kicked out of the military. He military currently? has a wife and kids, and you want to do this over something he probably didn’t even mean to say? He will personally apologize to you in front of the whole Erick: I do know two couples who are same sex and married in the military. One company…” (yes, he said he would do this), “if you would just let it go.” At that is a lesbian couple and the other couple is a male couple. The two males met point I felt like my feelings didn’t matter. They just wanted to sweep it all under on this past deployment and ended up getting married when they got back. The the rug and let it go. They even went on to say that this is something that would female couple I know personally, and they received time to go get married because follow me for the rest of my career. That I would have a packet saying that I was a [they had to go out of] state. They received time for a honeymoon, and I believe person who got someone kicked out of the military for this reason. So, eventually they are receiving full benefits. They’re happy about it; so far I haven’t heard any An orange or beige from jumpsuit or pair of scrubs with a simple white, longI did let it go, I didn’t accept his apology, and I just went on to AIT and my first complaints them. thermal shirt underneath would make the perfect Alex and Piper unit. I haven’t had any backlash here for my sexuality or what I like,sleeve I A hazmat ornegative bee-keeper suit with a face from Netflix’s series Orange is the New Black. Accessorize with dark guess. mask and rubber gloves will allow you rimmed glasses and fake tattoos for Alex or a blonde wig for Piper and to create the ideal Walter White, from you’re all set.

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O&A: How is the dating scene, being in the military?

Erick: The dating scene in the military sucks…. Military guys are usually like, “Yes, I’m gay, but only a select few people know.” Then you have those that are like, “Yes, I’m gay, but I’m still in the closet, and I can only be with another guy who can portray that straight outer façade.”….I’m proud of who I am. I’m proud to be black, I’m proud to be Christian, I’m proud to be gay, I’m proud to be in the military.

Why would I sit there and sacrifice who I am just to be with somebody else?….I won’t fake who I am to be with someone else.

O&A: You shouldn’t have to! Now, is this your first duty station?

Erick: Yes, and…I’m from the north, where you could walk down any street and get hit on by a couple of guys, one being black, one being white, one being Asian, before you get to where you are going….

[Here] it’s like, “Yeah, you have a great personality, and I could see us being great friends, BUT I don’t date black guys.” The thing with that is that it’s not just the white guys that say that: it’s also other black guys. It’s just strange because where I come from, that doesn’t happen.

O&A: Okay. That’s not specifically military, but the military doesn’t exactly ask you where you want to be stationed!

Erick: Definitely.

O&A: How is raising a child as a single, gay parent in the military?

I couldn’t even imagine!

Erick: I sacrifice a lot of my own needs and wants to ensure that she is raised correctly. It does weigh down on you. You’re a single parent.

All your other friends are going out to parties and having fun, because they don’t have the responsibilities of parenthood. It also makes it harder to date because you’re the single parent who’s not against meeting somebody but…you’re gay and out in the military with a kid.

So, that lowers the group of people that you could choose from.

O&A: So, the military aspect complicates it even more?

Erick: Dating in the military for gays just [adds] so much more stress on it. If you meet a civilian, [then] they live in this area, so when you get stationed somewhere else the odds are slim you will see them again. If they are military as well, when you get stationed somewhere else it’s not guaranteed that they will be stationed there. So it’s like a “don’t get emotionally attached” type of thing because you’ll be leaving soon.

O&A: Have you dated at all while you’ve been in the military?

Erick: Um…ha. No. O&A: Looking forward at the military’s advancement with Equal Opportunity, where would you like to see us head? Would you say it’s gotten better since you joined the Army?

Erick: I have heard stories of how [people]…were excessively teased or pushed to the point where you admitted to being gay so that they could kick you out. Now, however, I get back to work from a weekend, and my coworkers ask me how my weekend was, and I’m like, “It was good. I went to the gay club and danced with this other guy.” They’re like, “Oh, sounds like a great weekend.”… I have great faith in the change that is happening in the military. Hopefully, it will be able to have a greater [effect] on not just the United States but the rest of the world.

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OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

NOVEMBER 2014

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Readers can visit OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM from now through November 14th and cast votes for the Top 3 nominations in each of our 50 categories honoring their favorite LGBT individuals, businesses, and community events.

Winners will be unveiled in the O&AN year-end wrap up Gay Faves issue in December.

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OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

NOVEMBER 2014

Hello, Out and About Nashville readers! Welcome to the new humor column, Snarkology! I’m your humble columnist, Amy Sulam. So, who am I, and why am I writing this humor column? Well, let me give you a little background.

I am a Stand-up Comic and emcee. I tour nationally with three other comics in a group called The Unlockable Characters. We do stand-up comedy shows at comic book and gaming conventions. We’re “nerd” comics, if you will. I call Nashville home.

In addition to stand-up, I also volunteer with TEP as the Social Coordinator.

I’m a mom of two wonderful girls. I’m Jewish but my ethnicity is a cultural cluster-fuck. I grew up in a rock bottom, loserville, nothing town. I’m awkward and my face looks weird from all but one angle. I am a recovering drug addict. I have MS. I suffer from depression. I hate bullies… Oh! And I like girls.

I would say I’m bi because I’ve had relationships with both men and women.

I think it comes down to falling in love with people as opposed to genitals. If you’ve got my mind and my heart, what’s between your legs is secondary to me.

I’m attracted to intellect, but if that intellect happens to be attached to a really nice pair of boobs, that’d be great! No offense meant to the guys, but I just find a man’s “business” not nearly as nice to look at as a woman’s.

Currently, my only constant companionship and emotional support comes from my male, bisexual “pet human”, whom I will refer to in this column as Mr. Sprinkles. So … ladies…. If you like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain, etc. etc. awkwardly winking. I know, I’m not smooth at all. Generally when a woman says “I’m bi curious” I just blurt out “I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!” I’ve been told chicks do NOT, in fact, dig that. Needless to say I’m a work in progress.

Not too long ago, I went through a divorce and started re-struggling with my sexual identity. I had felt this struggle since I was a child. I had battled it, tried to push it down. In my relationships with women, the looming fear of others finding out always colored the connections. I knew at 14 telling my family I questioned my sexuality would go over like a gift wrapped bag of broken glass at a toddler party. There’s nothing worse than being absolutely crazy about someone who makes you so happy and yet not being able to tell any of your other friends in ninth grade for fear of what might happen.

I didn’t want to live like that after my divorce. I certainly did not want my kids to go through it. Their father’s attitude on alternative sexualities is pretty much, “I don’t have a problem with it, but it’s gross.” Very 1980’s frat boy. I didn’t want my kids to think that being gay was “Okay, but gross or weird.” It’s not. It’s perfectly normal.

I had to sit my kids down and “come out” to them. My youngest child was

thrilled with the idea of me dating another woman because all four of us could wear matching dresses, like some kind of lesbian L.L. Bean family. My oldest responded with, “So that’s it? That’s the big talk? Do we have to make it a whole thing? ’Cuz it’s not a big deal.”

They hugged me, said they loved me and wanted me to be happy, proving once again that hate isn’t innate: it’s taught. My kids haven’t learned that behavior and I’m going to make sure they never do. I don’t want to be responsible for adding to the pile of ignorance on the planet.

In this column I will use wit unapologetically to stand for social justice, to call out racism, sexism, and bigotry. I’ll report on the funny goings-on around town, and I’ll even give a little tongue-in-cheek feedback on what I see … occasionally!

I’m performing on next month’s Girl on Girl show at Zanies, December 3, if you’d like to come throw tomatoes at me. You can also check me out on social media if you’re so inclined. I’m @AmySulam on Twitter, @Snark_ology on Instagram, and Amy Sulam on “The Facebooks”.

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Victory Fund CEO Stepping Aside

CHUCK WOLFE DISCUSSES HIS WORK AND WHAT COMES NEXT

BY JAMES GRADY

The Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund is among the largest LGBT political action committees in the U.S., and its sole focus is on developing political leaders to advance the cause of seeing our community “reflected in the political leadership at all levels of government.” Since 2003, Chuck Wolfe has served as President and CEO of the organization, so his announcement in September rates as one of the biggest shakeups in LGBT advocacy in recent memory.

In a letter posted on the Victory Fund’s site, Wolfe said, “My decision to step down at the end of this year after nearly 12 years as president and CEO comes at a time of great progress for our community, but also at a moment when the LGBT movement must step up the intensity of our work in places where equality is late in arriving. After much soulsearching, I concluded now is the right time for me to seek a new challenge and to hand the tiller to someone else.”

In mid-October, the Victory Fund held a Champagne Brunch in Nashville to raise funds for the cause and to update the community on Victory’s work and strategic planning. Shortly after the brunch, Wolfe sat down with Out and About to discuss the Victory Fund’s work, his decision to step down, and his hopes for the future.

Could you help familiarize our readers with the Victory Fund’s work in Tennessee, and Nashville?

THE

Evolution of

FITNESS

CW: Throughout Tennessee, whenever we have viable candidates we’re all over that! Tennessee is a big state for us. You have one of the worst legislatures in the United States for equality. And people seem to wear that as a badge of honor that are on the other side. We would like to take that badge away. In Tennessee, our major goal is finally getting someone elected to the Tennessee legislature. In Nashville specifically, we’re focused on winning seats on the city council. We have at least two candidates next year, maybe more. It would be great to see one of those win, and one day run for mayor.

You have a strong focus on the legislature. In a state as conservative as Tennessee, what’s the real import of an LGBT legislature? The votes will still be just as conservative, right?

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NOVEMBER 2014 9/24/14

CW: It makes a world of difference. Patricia Todd in Alabama is your best example.

She’s the only out LGBT elected official in not just the legislature but the whole state! Just her being there has changed the political climate in the legislature, and some of [her] colleagues’ viewpoints. They aren’t running around passing good stuff, but they have stopped passing bad stuff! We sure would like to see Tennessee stop doing that, too!

A lot of LGBT political advocacy groups spend less in the Southeast. Victory seems to have a big interest here. What’s the difference?

CW: We’re proud of the fact that we spend more in places like Tennessee than we raise. We invest a lot of staff and training time, as well as support, in Tennessee and places like it. I’m proud of that. We had 350 people in the room at our brunch because people know we are actually investing in Tennessee candidates. Hearing Chris Anderson from Chattanooga talk about our support helps people understand the investment. And even though Nancy van Reece ran and lost, she knows we’ve

2:20 PM

been there with her and [it] helps people see that.

Tennessee is important to us because its politicians are among the most regressive. If people everywhere truly knew how backwards some of the elected officials here are, it would really impact the economy. There are major businesses today who will not move to a place as unwelcoming as Tennessee. And, you know, eventually you’ll watch businesses go elsewhere because Tennessee doesn’t treat their employees fairly.

What do you consider some of your organization’s biggest ‘wins’ in Tennessee?

CW: Once you announce you’re leaving a role like this after twelve years, you’re often asked to give this kind of reflection. Nationwide we’ve met with huge successes, but the hardest races are those most local races where you’re trying to break through a glass ceiling. We’ve supported Nancy van Reece in the past, and we’ve gotten so close! She’s such a genuine and sincere candidate, you really want for her to win. She hasn’t won that yet, but hopefully she will the next time. Chris Anderson’s race in Chattanooga, though, is probably one of our greatest success stories, because I don’t think anyone there thought it was possible, and we proved them wrong! I think the races where we prove people wrong are the ones I’ll remember for a long time.

How did this mission take over your life?

CW: Interesting way of putting it, but accurate! The Fund was founded in 1991, so I took over after successful directors, and I came in at just the right time, frankly. There was a wave ready to be ridden, a culture change going on, and we were there and relevant. For me, Victory was personally relevant.

I had worked as an out gay person in the Florida governor’s office at a time in the 1990s when that wasn’t done. I know the mission because I lived it.

How did it take over my life? It weaves itself into everything you do! I have no vacation between Labor Day and Election Day. I look at all my friends’ Facebook pages, and I see the beautiful fall photos.

They’re out riding bikes or horses, and I think, “I want to be there!” But at the same time you realize, “No, one more stop in Indiana or New Mexico means that one of our priority candidates could get some extra help.” You don’t want to pass up those chances, because we’re making history. It’s a remarkable thing to be part of.

It’s hard to make personal decisions when you get into rolls like this. There’s no way to separate the job from your personal decisions, so when you finally get to the point of having to make a decision for the benefit of you and your family, it hurts. It is actually physically painful to realize that I’m taking this part of me—that has woven itself into me, that I have taken care of and deeply care about—and saying “Alright, down! You have to take second place.” There’s no perfect time to do it, but I think it’s now, for me. If I hadn’t had the challenges I had this year, there’s no way I could have made this decision. Frankly, I never would have had the chance to sit and reflect. I would have just kept doing what I was doing. But it’s easier knowing a great team will keep it going and growing. While I say victory has to take second place in making this personal decision, I know victory isn’t going to suffer, it’s going to grow even larger under the next leader.

marquis races and more on state legislatures that still have no representation. There’s so much policy and law made at that level—we need to focus on it.

What will you be doing after this year?

CW: I got some great advice when I decided to step down: enjoy the time you have left. I’m planning to work as hard as I ever have worked for the next couple of months and that means you gotta finish this first.

I’m not going to try to create a new chapter before this one is over. I can’t see doing it any other way. I have a responsibility to the current team to raise money, support candidates, and help the board keep things sound while they seek a replacement.

For more information, or to get involved, visit https://www.victoryfund.org/.

What are the things you’d like to finish up before you leave?

CW: Before announcing my decision, I already knew my big dream for this year: winning a governor’s office. Having won race from senate to mayor, now we have a chance to win a governor’s office! For me that’s a huge opportunity, because I came from a governor’s office. I know the difference a governor can and will make. So, my big hopes for November are winning the Governor of Maine, attorney general of Massachusetts, and getting state legislators in places like New Mexico, Idaho, and Michigan. Those are big deals. We have a great county council race in Lexington. Next year the Mississippi legislature is up.

There I am thinking about next year. That’ll be for someone else!

Where do you think Victory Fund is headed, post Chuck?

CW: Honestly, I have no idea! But our new strategic plan will probably have a different focus, less on

That brings up the next logical question. Since we seem to be at the cusp of what may be a major change in culture and history, why now?

CW: It’s hard to explain how much it’s interwoven into my life, but twelve years is a long time. You know I had some health challenges at the beginning of the year, and again in the middle of the year. That gives you all of this time to think and reflect. Labor Day weekend, I had the joy of taking care of my nieces, and you know I just realize that’s a part of life I don’t have. I don’t have weekends, I don’t have time to do those things with family and friends. And I want that!

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25

HAL SPARKS on Being on TOP and Being on BOTTOM COMEDIAN HAL SPARKS PLAYED ZANIES ON SEPTEMBER 21. I SAT DOWN WITH HIM IN THE GREEN ROOM OF THE NASHVILLE COMEDY CLUB TO CHAT ABOUT GAY RIGHTS, HIS TELEVISION ROLES, AND THE ROLE OF COMEDY IN SOCIETY.

AMY E. HALL Hal Sparks is part underdog, part top dog. The triplethreat actor/comedian/musician currently stars in Disney’s popular Lab Rats sitcom as successful billionaire genius Donald Davenport, a character Sparks describes as “completely full of himself.” During this fourth and final season of Lab Rats, Sparks will not only star in the show, he will also direct at least four episodes. But success was not always a given for Sparks, who grew up as a poor kid in Kentucky.

“In high school, I was a ‘zero,’ and in many ways I won,” he recalls. “I was not expected to succeed in any of the stuff that I have sought to be.” Sparks paid homage to his unexpected journey by naming his hard rock band “Zero 1,” a subtle nod to 2001: A Space Odyssey.

His underdog past may have helped him connect to his arguably most groundbreaking TV role, Queer as Folk’s Michael Novotny, a character with whom Sparks shares very little. “I have nearly nothing in common with Michael…I’m much more bullish in my life. I’m much more in control,” the actor explains.

“The one thing [that I shared with Michael] is that I’ve always been panicked by the beauty of life. There are moments where it just floods, where you’re just like, ‘Oh, my God, this is all so beautiful, it’s silly.’ And Michael [had] that. He had that ‘I love you’ that came from somewhere rooted and deep and natural. And that’s what I liked, I think, most about him.”

Sparks isn’t shy about how heartbreakingly difficult it was to play Michael from 2000 to 2005, the five seasons Queer ran. “He was such an innocent, and he was so broadsided by life,” Sparks remembers. “It was an amazing acting experience to play Michael but it was like walking into a gut punch every time…There’s no other way to do it with Michael. You’re never guarded. So, it’s just always an open wound.”

Although Sparks describes the opportunity as utterly meaningful, it’s hard for him to miss the role.

“Part of me can’t because it was brutal from that aspect. Everybody thinks it’s because playing gay and sex scenes and all that stuff. ‘That must have been the hard work of it.’ It was by no means,” he adds. “But being in a relationship drama [portraying] a character who was loving and innocent to his core in a lot of ways was just a recipe for emotional disaster.”

Though Sparks himself is straight, he has been an advocate for gay rights since the early 90s—years before Queer came along. “I used to do the sound at [spiritual author and lecturer Marianne Williamson’s] lectures in L.A. Marianne[’s meeting] was one of the few spiritual gatherings in L.A. where gay people could come and feel accepted,” he notes. “At that point, with her, and with people at her lectures, I was volunteering for AIDS Project Los Angeles.”

In addition to his work with Williamson, a personal connection groomed him to be an ally.

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NOVEMBER 2014

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“I used to have four running buddies when I was growing up in Kentucky. Two of them have come out as gay. Fifty percent of my best friends when I was a kid were gay.” No “aha” moment was necessary for Sparks to support equality. “I didn’t have [an] endof-[an]-after-school moment where I was like ‘I need to learn to accept gay people’…The realization was that I never minded, really, and I couldn’t really wrap my head around the lack of acceptance. That part didn’t compute…It was that anybody gave a shit was peculiar to me.”

According to Sparks, a comedian’s role is to explore society’s viewpoints and examine fresh perspectives. “We all live in this highly complex social order and the more complex it gets, the more we run into what I would call like ‘psychological cul-de-sacs’ where everybody seems to be walking down a dead-end road and going in a circle doing something stupid or repetitive or pointless that we keep doing,” he explains. “Everybody’s doing the same shit and it’s not helping anybody and it’s not making us feel any better. So a comedian comes out, makes a big joke about it, and is essentially like a traffic cop going, ‘Everybody turn around. We’ll go back the other way. Nobody walk down this road anymore. It’s a dead end.’”

Sparks considers homophobia to be one of the “dead-end” destinations in this culture. “I always laugh at the idea of a gay agenda. The person

drowning does not have an agenda.

They just want to breathe. The person holding a person underwater is the one with the agenda. There’s a homophobic agenda. There’s not a gay agenda…

Only straight people who don’t think gay people should have rights have an agenda about how to do it and they file legislation and do legal briefs and they do all kinds of stuff,” he continues.

“So I’ve been very open about being straight because—it’s not because I’m trying to distance myself from my gay friends, my LGBT friends—it’s because I want the straight friends who don’t like that idea to know very strongly that I’m straight and I support everything about gay rights and fuck you.”

With a busy schedule that juggles his stand-up act, TV work, and playing and recording with his band, Sparks is committed to his craft. “That’s the whole job of being a singer, an artist, a poet, a painter: [to] convey understanding of a different point of view or give elevation to a hidden point of view or perspective that people are hiding from.”

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“It is said that time is the one true luxury, and we believe there’s always time for chocolate,” said Robert Bowden, owner and founder of Vivere, a new chocolate shop located in New Jersey. Though he now resides in New Jersey, Bowden says that Nashville is where he truly grew up and became an adult.

Before moving to New Jersey and opening Vivere, Bowden lived and worked in Nashville after college.

Former customers of OutLoud on Church Street might recognize Bowden as one of its long-time employees.

Bowden’s move from Church Street took him to an even more ironic address: “From Church Street to Chocolate Avenue,” he joked. “The irony that I now live on a street with the honorary name Chocolate Avenue isn’t lost on me!”

Robert’s interest in the chocolate business isn’t new. He explained, “Well, it has always been an industry that fascinated me. My dad worked as a contractor, and two chocolate companies hired him to build out their store fronts when I was a kid. I tagged along. Most of my adult life, though, was in luxury sales: horses, spas, hotels, etc. Shortly after moving to Jersey from Nashville, I met a local chocolatier looking to grow his business, and I jumped at the opportunity to learn from him.”

Vivere has been in development since last fall, and it finally opened its

doors on September 21, 2014. When asked why he named his business Vivere, which doesn’t immediately scream chocolate, he said that “the driving force behind the business is daring to live, hence the name: To inspire people to live in the moment and make the most out of life.”

Though only two months old, sales of Vivere’s artisan, handmade, gourmet truffles—with no preservatives or artificial flavors—are booming. “Our signature caramel, ‘Salted Fennel Caramel,’ recently won Bronze at the International Chocolate Salon this year for Top Luxury Caramel, so we are now having to make sure we stay on top of the growing demand. It is a great problem to have.”

Robert said that in order to stay on top of their game and to keep their business growing, they are planning to “beef up our product line by adding new flavors. We are currently in negotiations to open a second retail shop. We are also looking to expose the product to Nashville through participating and partnering with LGBT events in that area. Our goal was to create a successful business that is connected to the LGBT community.” Chocolate AND charity sounds like a winning combination!

What could be better?

So, go check out their goodies at http://cocoavivere.com and on Facebook, and sample some truly delicious chocolate!

IGNITE SETS MURFREESBORO’S GAY SCENE ABLAZE!

BY PAIGE TURNER

Move over, Nashville! There’s a player in the LGBT club scene, and it’s just down the road in the ’Boro! That’s right, folks. Murfreesboro doesn’t just have a club with gay nights anymore: Ignite has gone all gay.

At first, the club was prepared for a gradual transformation, but because of the popularity of gay “theme” nights, the bar transformed itself in practically the blink of an eye! Naturally, Out and About Nashville had to check this place out and deliver all the details on the newest and hottest gay happening in the ’Boro.

The bar’s owner, Troy Janes, is a very experienced club owner, and he has been personally involved with the entire project, from top to bottom, personally driving and overseeing the transition. Janes excitedly discussed the big plans he has in store for all the club goers in the area, and with 8 years of experience owning and operating bars, there is little doubt he’ll be a success this time.

This time, you ask? That’s right, a lot of people don’t know that Janes tried delving into the LGBT club scene in Murfreesboro back in 1998 at Bongo Johnny’s, but Murfreesboro wasn’t ready. In the years since, MTSU has grown and has a thriving LGBT group on campus, and the area has a much larger gay community than even a few years ago. This inspired Janes to give it another shot with Ignite, and so far all his bets are paying off.

Janes is committed to offering the LGBT community around Murfreesboro a high quality experience, an alternative to Nashville. In order to meet or beat their expectations, Janes likes to maintain close contact with his clientele and to solicit feedback about their experience at his club. That feedback is driving his plans for development, and he promises a lot of great things coming down the pipeline for his guests.

Janes’s commitment to running a quality LGBT club in Murfreesboro—and the persistence he showed in trying again—is even more remarkable, given a surprising fact: even though he has a lot of gay friends and is very close with the local LGBT community, Janes himself isn’t LGBT. I found this fascinating, because you don’t normally see straight allies running LGBT clubs, especially in places like Murfreesboro.

The night I visited, Ignite was packed with faces familiar from around the Nashville scene. The club was very nice, overall, with a large, well-decorated bar and lounge area out front, and a smaller show bar in the back. (There are plans to reverse the arrangement, so the larger area will be the show bar.) Ignite’s main show pays homage to the golden days of drag, featuring cast members from places like the “Warehouse.”

Don’t worry, though. If old school drag isn’t your flavor, they have a huge list of amazing performers coming up that is sure to fulfill whatever drag craving you have! The night I visited, for instance, there was clear excitement in the air, as

a large crowd had come to see RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 1 contestant Victoria ‘Porkchop’ Parker. She graced the stage with show-stopping performances and her funny antics.

All in all, I enjoyed my visit. Everyone was very friendly, and although I didn’t get to interact much with the cast, I got to speak with many customers. One patron said, “I’m kinda over the whole Nashville scene. The queens there always do similar things, drink prices are too high, plus you have to pay an entry fee. I just don’t wanna drive forty-five minutes to get the same exact experience I got last week!”

Will Ignite affect the Nashville club scene? Only time will tell, but the night I was there a lot of the signs point to Ignite growing into a force to be reckoned with.

Ignite probably won’t cut too deeply into Play’s bottom line, but locals love having an alternative in their own back yard. So, it looks like things are just heating up at Ignite!

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29

Forbidden Love

TAKES CENTER STAGE BEHIND THE SCENES AT ACT 1’S LILIES ////////////

BY JAMES GRADY

Lilies, a play by Canadian playwright Michel Marc Bouchard, has been called “an operaticvision revenge fantasy; stunning in its structure,” by the New York Times. Lilies is just the sort of play that fulfills Act 1’s mission, to bring “theatrical gems—both classic and modern—to Middle Tennessee Audiences.”

The show won several awards in Canada, and opera adaption will open in Montreal next year.

Lilies delves into the relationship between an ex-prisoner named Simon, who has spent 40 years in jail for a crime he did not commit, and a Bishop, whom he lures to a meeting under false pretenses. Lilies utilizes a playwithin-a-play format, focusing on a tragic series of events that took place 40 years earlier. Through staged scenes acted out by a group of Simon’s former prison-mates (requiring the all-male cast to play both male and female roles), it is revealed that he and the bishop were part of a gay love triangle.

The action transitions continuously and fluidly between reality and re-enactment, and builds to a resolution both tragic and transcendent.

Act 1’s Lilies is helmed by Matt Smith, who is making his directorial debut. Lilies might seem like a daunting show for a first-time director, given the “play within a play” format and the bare-bones staging.

Every play’s success depends—to a greater or a lesser degree—on the skill of its actors, but Lilies relies almost exclusively on the development of its characters.

“Essentially,” Smith pointed out, “the show focuses on a set of ex-prisoners using what they’ve got on hand to throw on a show for the captive bishop. You don’t have the opportunity to create specific sets and locations that convey meaning. All of that has to really come from actors creating and being faithful to their characters. It’s a play that absolutely requires strong performances by good, committed actors. I was truly grateful for the cast we put together, experienced men with theatre in their blood. Exactly the kind of

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actors we required!”

Smith was deeply impacted by the show from his first reading of the script, which drove his passion to direct it. As an openly bisexual male, Smith was struck by the overtones of male-male love in the play.

“Most obviously, LGBT audiences understand the aspect of forbidden love: two young men in love in provincial Quebec at a Catholic Boys School in 1912?” The story of one boy willing to give it all up for love and another stymied by social expectations resonates powerfully with the LGBT experience.

What Smith finds most meaningful and moving about the play, however, lies below the surface. “The play asks a cliché question,” he explained. “What kind of love is powerful enough to transcend all? Family love, romantic love, and the love between a saint and God are all put under the microscopw, as the play explores whether love can transcend even death.”

As an LGBT person, Smith finds it most gratifying that, on his reading, the play is not about same-sex love. “At the core of this play, an assumption is made: all love should be treated equally. The play itself assumes all of those loves are okay. There is this forbidden love and tragedy, but that’s not what it’s about to me. It’s about the dynamic between tragedy and love, rather than being about two gay boys’ tragic love. Yes, we’re hit in the face with forbidden love, but the real focus is on the power of love itself, the questions the author asks, and how he structures his answers.”

Smith is confident Nashville theatregoers will be deeply affected: “At one recent rehearsal, we were sitting in a classroom without set or props, just reading our scripts.

What they acted out with nothing but their voices moved me to tears. It’s hard to imagine what it will be like when it’s all put together.”

Lilies will be performed at The Darkhorse Theatre between November 7–15. For more information, or to purchase tickets, visit ACT 1’s website, act1online.com.

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NASHVILLE A KIKI WITH UNTUCKED KAMERON

BY PAIGE TURNER

IT’S TIME FOR A KIKI WITH KAMERON, PLAY DANCE BAR’S REIGNING MISS GENESIS. WELL, ONE OF THEM! THIS MEMBER OF SUNDAY NIGHT’S GLAM SQUAD SPILLED ALL THE “T” ABOUT WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE PLAY’S POSTER GIRL, ALL AROUND DRAG QUEEN, ANIMAL ACTIVIST AND MORE. SHE ALSO REVEALS HOW SHE REALLY FEELS ABOUT THE INFAMOUS 2015 “GENESIS TIE,” AND WHY SHE TOOK A BREAK FROM DRAG! SO, SIT BACK AND RELAX AS WE GET UNTUCKED AND VENTURE INTO THE WORLD OF GLAM CITY.

Where can our readers keep up with you on social media?

Twitter and Instagram: danetheyoung

4.65 x 5.25 trim

When did you start doing drag?

The first time I did drag was when I was eighteen. Austria Andrews was the host of Sunday Nights, and she asked me to do it. I had asked Angel Electra paint my face, and she did.

Who is your drag mother, and who are your biggest inspirations?

I would say Sapphire Mylan, because she has always helped and mentored me, so she is my drag mother. But recently, Aurora Sexton has helped and taught me a lot, so I would say she’s kind of like a stepmother. I tend to draw inspiration from many different queens. Locally, I take the most after Nichole E Dupree, as far as stage presence and just having your stuff together, especially knowing your words. Makeup-wise I follow Miss Fame and get a lot of inspiration from her looks.

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What is your favorite song to perform?

Umm, I don’t know! Currently I love doing “Fancy,” but usually just anything that is high energy, something that makes the crowd react, like Pink. If I go to a bar and I haven’t performed there before, Pink would be on my set list.

Why did you take a break from the drag scene?

Well, I took a break because I started to fill out, and things just got busy. I wasn’t able to keep up, plus I had also started a relationship, so I really just didn’t have the time to do it anymore. My boyfriend said I should get rid of it because I wasn’t using it, and I was like “Yeah, you’re right.” He didn’t necessarily dislike drag or anything, but it just so happened that I started doing it again around the time of our breakup.

What would you say is you biggest accomplishment in your drag career?

Winning Miss Genesis this year! It was my first pageant, and I had just decided that day to do it. I thought, “Well, I have all the stuff so I might as well do it.”

Aurora Sexton helped me put everything together, but I was really nervous the whole time, but everyone kept telling me not to worry. It being my first time, I didn’t want to bomb because I like to succeed in everything I do. It turned out I swept every category but talent. Another accomplishment I value is my work with the Humane Association, helping get pets adopted and prevent animal abuse.

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What is it like for you performing at Play Dance Bar, and how do you feel about the auditioning process?

I love working at Play! It’s such a great opportunity to perform in front of large crowds and meet some of the best drag queens in the business! As far as the auditions, I feel the process can be stressful, but I think that judging based on performance quality and crowd reaction is fair.

Have you ever auditioned or considered to audition for RuPaul’s Drag Race?

Yes, I actually auditioned last year. I’m probably going to again, because why not?

But I’m the type of person if you give me directions I will follow them to a “t” and some of the audition videos I watched of girls who made it didn’t really do that. So, I just think there’s a lot of stuff I will do differently this time.

How do you feel about the RuPaul Girls?

Well, a lot of queens don’t think they deserve to get paid as much as they do, or get the credit they deserve. But honestly, I think about the times Joey Brown (Play Owner) has called me and asked me to do the show last minute. It’s very stressful because you have to pack and get ready and all this. I can’t imagine what it’s like for them flying from city to city having to do all that all the time. So, I feel like they deserve it for all the hard work put into it.

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33

TRANSGENDER TARGETS

BY BOBBI WILLIAMS

In the early days of my coming out I was a regular at the only place in town where I felt safe—a gay bar called ‘Bout Time.

On one of those nights, a burly man about twice my size sat down next to me, placed his hand on my thigh, and began muttering obscenities. The bartender picked up on my reaction and came over, leaned across the bar so that he was sure the burly man heard him, and said, “Is everything all right here?”

The burly man took his hand off my leg, and I said “Yes…for now.”

“Well,” the bartender said, “if you need anything, just let me know.” And as he walked away I turned to the burly man and said, “If you ever touch me again I’ll have you thrown out of here.”

His response was a string of expletives including the ‘b’ word, the ‘c’ word, and words I didn’t know existed (and I was an English major). Later that evening, when I left the bar, I was escorted to my car and my escort shined his flashlight into the back seat to make sure I was safe. That night I learned what most women already knew about men: you can’t trust most of them.

Transgender women, and especially transwomen of color, are victims of violence at a much higher rate than the general population. The Trans Violence Tracking Portal reports that, although transgender people make up 1 to 1.5% of the world’s population, we are about 400 times more likely to be assaulted or murdered than the rest of the population.

(Yes, I said four hundred.)

For transwomen who are newly out, including anyone testing their gender identity, problems stem from having been raised as a male, unaware of the dangers women face. As a man, I could park ten blocks from the bar and walk there alone.

As a woman (especially in four inch stilettos and a miniskirt), I am a target.

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They shouldn’t, but men interpret the situation as an invitation. And the same holds true for the transwoman who wants to ‘test the waters’ in a straight bar. She is thrilled that she ‘passes,’ but invites tremendous risks if she accepts a drink from a strange man and pushes the limits of her ‘passability.’ It’s all a matter of safety.

We were not taught what our mothers taught our sisters. Hang on to your purse.

Always take your keys out before you leave the bar. Park as close as possible. Don’t walk down the street alone. Never get into someone’s car if you don’t really know them.

On Thursday, November 20, 2014, The Transgender Day of Remembrance will be marked in Tennessee with candlelight vigils at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Chattanooga, East Tennessee State University in Johnson City, and the Alternative Counseling Center in Knoxville. Nashville’s event is scheduled for 7:00-9:30, but program details are not finalized (contact Petey.peterson@vanderbilt.edu for more information. Events worldwide are listed at http://tdor.info/

Each year in November a vigil is held in most of the major cities. The Transgender Day of Remembrance honors the memory of transgender people who died as a result of violence directed specifically toward us. A few years ago a friend named Stephanie who didn’t drive accepted a ride from a man she met at the bar. He walked her to the door of her apartment and asked if he could come in and get a glass of water.

She said yes, and he went to the kitchen while she went into the bathroom. When she came out, she found him going through her purse. He had a knife, and he slit her throat.

I shouldn’t be afraid, but I need to be.

All women have to remain vigilant. It’s not right. It’s not fair. But it’s the way it is. I can only hope that someday it will be different.

OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

NOVEMBER 2014

Read the full story of Stephanie in Me & Bobbi & the Gyrls available at http://bookstore.xlibris.com/ Find out more about violence against transgender people at: The Transgender Violence Tracking Portal http://www.transviolencetracker.org Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation http://www.glaad.org/

Dr. Bobbi Williams is an author, teacher, lecturer, and consultant.

Comments may be sent to her at bobbi@bobbiw.net

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