JESSE EHRENFELD Elected Chairman of the AMA Board
MAYOR PETE’S FUNDRAISER A HUGE SUCCESS + A LOOK AT STF EVENTS & CATERING AUGUST 2019 / VOLUME 18 / ISSUE 08 FIRST ISSUE FREE - ADD’L COPIES 50¢ EACH
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CONTRIBUTORS
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CONTENTS
Writers: Craig Ammon, Ellie Coburn, James Grady, Josh Robbins, Jason Shawhan
Photographers: Jerry Jones, Will Shutes
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Cover: Photos of Jesse Ehrenfeld courtesy of Vanderbilt University
LGBT MEMBER SPOTLIGHT: STF EVENTS & CATERING
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REVIEW: URBANIA
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MAYOR PETE IN NASHVILLE
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JESSE EHRENFELD ELECTED CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD
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LIVING WITH HIV & DEFAULTING TO HEALTHY
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WOMANHOOD, BODY IMAGE, AND THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY
STF Events & Catering
CRAIG AMMON
What could be more fun and exciting than gathering friends to enjoy a few cocktails and the thrill of axe throwing? Well, that’s exactly what over 100 Nashville LGBT Chamber of Commerce members enjoyed at the April Brewing Up Business right here in Nashville! They met at member-owned BATL, the first organization in the world to offer an urban venue for indoor axe throwing. The event was a huge success, as members mingled, made new business connections, took their turns axe throwing, and enjoyed an array of delicious appetizers and desserts provided by long-time Chamber member STF Events & Catering. STF Events & Catering co-owners, and spouses, Joelle Upton and Eleni Vavouris, marvel at how the Nashville LGBT Chamber of Commerce has grown and matured since its early days. Chamber membership has grown tremendously, it’s established scholarships for educational opportunities for our members, has over 30 LGBT certified business enterprises, and
influenced corporate practices and state legislation that impact the LGBT community. Upton says their business has grown and matured over the years, as well, as they’ve branched out from their successful catering company to producing a collection of salsas and marinades for folks to enjoy with their own cooking. The two women founded STF Events & Catering in 2005, but their relationship with each other goes back a few more years, and their love for food and cooking go back to early childhood. Upton says her grandparents shared their enthusiasm for locally-sourced food before it was cool! They had several acres of farmland and fruit trees, and Upton spent her summers planting and picking fruits and vegetables, canning goods, and learning to cook them with her grandparents. She carried that love for food and cooking to college, earning a degree in Food Service Management. Vavouris also developed a passion for food and cooking in her early years, watching and learning from her older relatives on both sides of her family. Her father came from a large Greek family, and they all lived
in a Greek community in Memphis, so her paternal grandparents taught her to prepare and enjoy the food of their shared heritage. On her mother’s side, the family’s Southern roots influenced the flavors and techniques of the comfort food Vavouris learned to cook with her Maw Maw. While her love for food and cooking was unmistakable, Vavouris pursued a degree in Human Environmental Science and planned to enjoy cooking as a hobby. But later, as she expressed frustration with her plan, a sorority sister encouraged Vavouris to pursue her passion for cooking and food and make it her career. Vavouris and Upton met at Gaylord Opryland Hotel, where they were each pursuing a 3-year culinary apprenticeship. The experience was amazing, but short-lived. The hotel ended the program after their first year, and they both had to make other plans. Upton and Vavouris both moved to Kentucky to pursue degrees in Culinary Arts and Professional Catering from nationally recognized Sullivan University, where they honed their skills cooking as classically trained chefs. With STF, their goal has always been to combine approachable, comforting, delicious food prepared meticulously and presented beautifully. In fact, clients are so taken by the unique flavors that Vavouris creates that they have repeatedly asked her for recipes. Well, a great chef never shares those recipes, but Vavouris was intrigued by the idea of enabling her clients to enjoy her famous flavors in their own cooking at home. So, in 2017 she launched Eleni Vavouris Originals (EVO).
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Vavouris knew that she needed to engage a co-packer, so she could focus on the catering day-to-day, and she was as particular in choosing them as she was choosing the ingredients for her creations. After several test runs together, the team perfected 4 recipes: Original Salsa, Spicy Roja Salsa, Chipotle Peach Sauce, and Greek Marinade. This summer they released two new flavors in their Craft Series: Smokey Bourbon Salsa & Nashville Hot Salsa. Of course, EVO is a completely different business model than the catering business. In addition to selling the salsas and marinades through local vendors, Vavouris saw an opportunity to sell her products in larger quantities to restaurants and hotels. Upton and Vavouris realized that National LGBT Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC) LGBT Business Enterprise (LGBTBE) certification could provide them an advantage when competing for business with these larger franchises that reserve a share of their contracts for minority-owned vendors. Former CEO Lisa Howe had been encouraging them for years to certify STF Events & Catering, but the incentive for EVO was far greater. Around the time the NFL Draft came to Nashville, they went through the process and are just awaiting a site visit to finalize their certification and compete for large contracts to propel their business ventures to the next level. Upton says it was the decision to pursue NGLCC certification that prompted them to be more intentional about attending meetings, networking with other members, and of course catering for the recent Brewing Up Business. “I’m terrible at networking,” Upton said with a laugh. “I enjoy meeting new people and talking to folks, but somehow the networking label can make it feel weird and forced. But as you get older, you become more comfortable in who you are and what you do. I know our food and service is great and I’m always happy to talk about it.” Upton and Vavouris are happy to see that Chamber meetings are now more diverse, with women and people of color and trans-
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gender people in attendance. Upton said, “I’m also really happy to see and talk to so many people doing their thing in and around the city. Certification is the next step in our EVOlution with EVO and STF. We hope we can help others navigate not only the process of being certified, but also feel welcome and relaxed at Chamber networking events.” To secure STF Events & Catering for your next wedding or corporate event, please reach out to info@stfcatering.com. To find a list of retailers offering EVO products, please visit evoriginals.com/where-to-buy.
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Shear’s gifts as a director should lead to a very promising future for the former actor (he was Winona Ryder’s friend at the school newspaper in Heathers), as his realization of the script (with ace cinematographer Shane Kelly) is coupled with the understanding that technology is a great boon when it is used in the creation of a good and unique story. The film’s press notes stated that it was only the second film to be finished completely in the digital realm. The first one: Star Wars, Episode I. Deep down at its hardened but benevolent core, Urbania is a tale of frustration, desire, loss, redemption, lust, and peace. It manages to be powerful, sad, darkly funny, randy, laden with regret, and filled with every sort of palpable emotion. It dishes out a lot of sex (the good, transgressive kind) and violence (the horrifying kind, where you feel every punch and slap and cut), and it’s the kind of experimental queer artwork that doesn’t even make it to theatres anymore.
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URBANIA JASON SHAWHAN
When it first came out in theatres in 2000, which seems like a lifetime ago, Jon Shear’s Urbania was just one of many independent films showing in mainstream-ish places. It opened locally in Green Hills and hanged around for two weeks, which is wild, because one of the central issues with loving and recommending the film then was how to get people to experience this unique and moving example of fully-realized cinema without pandering to the people who are left quaking in their boots by the thought of two men kissing onscreen. This was an issue, even back when the community could be relied upon to support queer art. Charlie (Academy Award-winner Dan Futterman, whom you may remember as the incarnation of ignorant heterosexual contempt in The Birdcage before he found his Oscar for writing Capote) is stuck in a rut following the death of his boyfriend. But that rut seems to have altered the elasticity of the real, and weird things are happening all around—a lot of them reminiscent of urban legends that we’ve all often heard some variation of. So there’s some thematic resonance with horror classics (like Candyman) and horror non-classics (like the Urban Legend trilogy), but the horror in this film is more rooted in finding your own experience becoming a story whispered on street corners to terrify young twinks. At the time, Urbania sat amongst similar Y2K films about the human grief process like One True Thing and The Idiots, and there’s even some Eyes Wide Shut in the mix, as well. Despite its more fanciful plot elements, this is one of those films that digs down into your synapses and soul, and those weirder choices help keep things from feeling like a chore. This is one of those movies that is interested in the way you respond to what you see, and as such is willing to play some digressive or sneaky narrative games along the way. Futterman is like Tom Hanks in Joe Vs. The Volcano or Holly Hunter in anything—delivering quiet, unshowy work that merits inclusion among the truly great screen performances of our time. In opening up Daniel Reitz’ play Urban Folk Tales, director Shear (working with Reitz) presents us with a story that has to be told cinematically. As a play, there is no way that this experience could have had the same cumulative effect on the viewer as it does in its fully realized form as a film.
To find this film, you’ve got to do some searching—it’s not streaming anywhere, and the DVD from Lionsgate is out of print. But I’ll tell you a secret: it’s worth it. And if you make that journey, this film yields big emotional dividends.
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PHOTOS: WILL SHUTES
MAYOR PETE in NASHVILLE Interested Voters Turned Out in Droves STAFF
On July 17 & 18, 2019, Mayor Pete Buttigieg visited Nashville and held a number of events, where he spoke to potential voters and laid out more of the values he hopes to bring to the race. Much of what he said helps explain his very broad appeal. He expressed a progressive agenda, while refusing to allow the right to hijack the language of values and religion. At Waller, where a VIP reception was held, Buttigieg told audiences that “these values are not conservative values, they are American values that I believe often have progressive implications. First of all being freedom, which is talked about as all there was to freedom was kind of text a somewhere. We know that you lack freedom, if you don’t have health care, and don’t have the chance to live the American dream, go start a small business, because you’re afraid leaving your old job means you lose your benefits. Healthcare is part of freedom too. By the way, reproductive rights are part of freedom too...”
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“Freedom comes by way of access to quality education, which is why we ought to have a Secretary of Education who believes in public education,” he added. “I don’t think anyone is free, so long as a county clerk gets to tell them who they ought to marry, just based on their interpretation...” Buttigieg also addressed racial inequality: “There isn’t anybody free so long as we live in a country where your race can predict your life expectancy, your income, your educational outcomes, and your experience with the criminal justice system...” His campaign he said also strives to show that conservatives don’t control the discourse around religion and the public sphere. “It’s a chance to change the conversation about faith and assert for all to see that voters of faith have a choice, and that God does not belong to a political party,” he said. But his version doesn’t leave those who believe differently out in the cold. “We’re going to serve people of any religion and of no religion, because that’s
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PHOTOS: JERRY JONES
how it works when you’re in public office. We’re also going to let people who are guided by religious values know that they don’t have to check those values at the door and be on board with a president whose personal character, needless to say, flies in the face of a lot of what we hear on Sunday morning, But also whose policies are designed to afflict the afflicted and comfort the comfortable: we have a chance to do it the other way around.” Buttigieg spoke about many other topics at length and impressed his audience. As future debates proceed, Americans will no doubt learn a great deal more about Candidate Buttigieg.
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Jesse Ehrenfeld Elected Chairman of the Board Nashville LGBTQ Physician Marks a New First at the AMA
PHOTOS COURTESY OF VANDERBILT UNIVERSITY
JAMES GRADY
IFew organizations have as great an influence on public health as the American Medical Association (AMA). The group has a long history of working to see that current, evidence-based medicine becomes the standard for physicians as individuals, as well as for public policy. Four years ago, the AMA saw its first LGBTQ representative, Vanderbilt’s Professor Jesse Ehrenfeld, elected to the Board, and this summer Ehrenfeld became the first LGBTQ Chairman of the Board. Shortly after assuming the role, Ehrenfeld and I discussed the role of the Board of the AMA, what it has done and will continue to do in the realms of LGBTQ healthcare, and the progress that has been made in LGBTQ healthcare in Middle Tennessee over the last decade. Tell me a little bit about what the board does and what role the chairman has with that. The governance of the AMA is really pretty extraordinary. It brings together the entire profession: all of the states and specialty societies come together to set policy through their democratic process. There are two policymaking meetings every year, one in June and one in November. And that policy is then executed through the actions of the Association, which is overseen by the Board of Trustees, led by its Chair, who serves as the primary spokesperson for the Board. As the first openly LGBT man on the board, do you feel your presence has
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an impact on those discussions when they’re being held? Well, the AMA is deeply committed to helping achieve greater health equity, across healthcare, and that happens in a variety of ways ... by trying to understand at a system level how we can identify and eliminate inequities. And that includes, obviously, the disparities faced by the LGBTQ community. My perspective as an LGBTQ person, in conversations around how do we try to get better, meaningful, affordable healthcare coverage to all communities, I think is important because, unfortunately, LGBTQ people have been invisible, in many conversations, for decades, at the highest levels of our associations in trying to improve health equity. In recent years, what have been some of the most prominent efforts that the AMA has been behind or has supported in terms of LGBTQ health and healthcare? For a long time the AMA has had policies supporting equal rights, opposing discrimination based on sex orientation and gender identity, and that is foundational for the work that the Association has done. The AMA has a long list of policies that informs healthcare systems and patients about how we can best support LGBT people and fight against discrimination and abuse. Those policies include work that we have done to try to help prevent violence against transgender people … to form better partnerships to educate not only the public, but law enforcement and legislators about hate crimes against transgender individuals.
The AMA has long championed opposing the stigma associated with HIV epidemic, which is very important to our community. We just passed additional policy advocating ending criminalization of HIV status, and trying to continue to have evidence based practices and recommendations driving policy across the country. There’s also a long list of patient-centered policies around trying to inform patients about their rights to receive equal and equitable treatment, and encouraging research into areas of need in the community that we don’t really fully understand. For example, encouraging research into the longterm impact of administration of hormone replacement in transgender patients: we just don’t have great data on those kinds of issues. At the AMA we are trying to support better understanding of the evidence, and to generate the evidence, for our patients. And, as you’re probably well aware, the AMA believes that all Americans should have access to meaningful, affordable healthcare that is foundational to improving the health of our nation. And we’re firmly committed to making sure that LGBTQ people are a part of that. And we remain committed to ensuring that we protect coverage gains that we’ve had through the Affordable Care Act and continue to expand coverage for those who currently don’t have it. What role does the AMA play in educating its members about social issues or about the way social issues interact with the delivery of healthcare?
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We take a fairly proactive stance. And there are a number of ways that we do that. We obviously have policies that we then make available to our members, physician members, as well as Association members. that participate in trying to improve access. We have a really growing wonderful education center, where physicians and trainees can obtain the latest information pulled from places like the JAMA Education Network online. And we are growing our ability to have more representive LGBTQ content in that education center as a part of our efforts to improve... We are also trying to make sure that LGBTQ people continue to be part of the conversation as we try to improve access across the nation. So starting your tenure as Chairman, what would you like to see accomplished in the coming term, both in terms of LGBTQ health and more generally? I want to see every American have access to affordable health care. And we’re far from that. We’ve made significant gains with the Affordable Care Act. And we are committed to fixing the current system. I am hopeful that LGBTQ people will be counted, recognized, and brought along with so many other populations that have been marginalized and not recognized as having unique needs for far too long. In the public imagination, what are some of the least thought about health issues that LGBT people face? I think there’s a lot of focus on things that are different for LGBTQ people—vaccinations, PrEP, some of those kinds of things that are a little bit different in terms of recommended guidelines. But I see a lot of need, and it’s not talked about unfortunately, in the behavioral health space. So many LGBTQ people suffer from stress and behavioral health challenges of being an LGBTQ person, particularly in the South, where there is data showing that additional stigma becomes an additional burden. We know that that continues to be a challenge for people and is not often discussed, I think, as widely as some medical issues related to LGBTQ health. You’ve been in Nashville for nine years now, and you are headed to Wisconsin in September. In your decade in Nashville, given your work in LGBTQ health at Vanderbilt, what are you proud of that has been accomplished during your tenure? I am extraordinarily proud of the huge gains that I’ve seen across the region in terms of access to highly competent care for LGBTQ people. And it’s not that we haven’t had wonderful facilities and physicians and providers providing care across Middle Tennessee, for LGBTQ people, for a long time that predates my arrival. But with the development of the LGBTQ program at Vanderbilt, I think there is now a much better, organized, systematic way of patients getting connected to the care that they need. And I’m incredibly proud of that. The fact that we have now four transgender clinics at Vanderbilt that didn’t exist three years ago is an extraordinary step forward to provide access to care. The fact that we have clinics and specialists to have deep knowledge and expertise to provide care is just extraordinary. But there are still huge unmet needs. And I still get calls every week from patients who struggle to access care because of either non-insurance or under-insurance. And those are systematic issues that we really need to take a look at, across our country, as well as the state level. But I’m incredibly proud of the gains that we’ve made in Nashville and across the region. I know that especially transgender healthcare has come such a long way in Middle Tennessee. Those clinics that have opened, what populations do they serve? There is a plastic surgery clinic for trans patients, there is a pediatric clinic, an adult clinic, and a clinic in women’s health. The ESS15_EN_HalfPageH_August.indd 1 faculty and the teams are doing a great job of coordinating care. They have been doing a wonderful job of working with partners across the nation in making sure that our practices across the region are in line with standard and best practices informed by the
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latest evidence base. And I think that the overall experience that patients are having, not just at Vanderbilt but at facilities across the region, has just been greatly improved, because there is a better recognition of what is appropriate, what is needed, and the unique needs of people in the LGBTQ community. Both in Nashville and nationwide, with the increased availability of care, have you noticed that there’ve been more people looking for services, that the need is much larger than was perhaps originally predicted? Yeah, you know, as the saying goes, “If you build it, they will come.” And we have seen at Vanderbilt, and other clinics that we are in touch with across the nation, exponential growth in the number of patients coming in for care and for services. The clinic that we started down in Bellevue was one half-day a week. Within the first year, that was increased to a full day a week, doubling the capacity, simply because the demand far outstripped what we expected to see. And a couple of wonderful things are happening, James: more patients are able to get access to care because of gains in coverage. And there’s also now a recognition that the care that we are providing is appropriate, safe, effective, legitimate, and
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no longer having to be hidden in ways that was happening even as recent as a decade ago. What do you think are some of the growth opportunities that Nashville has, building on these gains to meet tomorrow’s needs? Well, we still need to get coverage for everybody. And unfortunately, we’re far from that. Millions of people across the country and thousands in Tennessee just don’t have health insurance. And we need solutions to make coverage more affordable, because we know that people who don’t have health insurance, live sicker and die younger. And we just unfortunately won’t solve that problem until we get coverage for everyone.
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LIVING WITH HIV & DEFAULTING TO HEALTHY JOSH ROBBINS
In my seven years of HIV activism on digital and social media, I have seen how much people want to be healthy and live long lives. But it can often be difficult to default to healthy living. We have roadblocks all over the place hindering our journey to the ultimate health nirvana. From the food and drink choice decisions we make every day, to the relationships we make with our medical providers, to thinking about the health issues that come with age, it can be overwhelming to find that balance of living in the moment and making healthy, impactful decisions. Since I was diagnosed with HIV, making my health a priority means that I have to recognize the warning signs of when things go wrong and also really consider how to make things go right more often. It starts with remembering that I am not invincible and that I need to start thinking about all the preventable health screenings that are needed as I continue to age. These include checking on my weight, my cholesterol levels, my prostate, and being mindful of my mental health.
WHY TAKE THESE HEALTH SCREENINGS? Heart disease is the most common cause of death in males. Heart disease and stroke are most commonly caused by high cholesterol. And the only way to know whether I’m treading on the riskier side of things is to get screened and see where my levels fall. I need to reassess where I am with my life and the goals that I want to accomplish, andthen consider if my behavior is aiding or hind ering my success. Specifically, am I drinking too much, eating out too often, drinking enough water, exercising enough? Have I set myself up for the types of relationships and friendships I want? And it’s not just my own health I need to consider. I, like so many, have family members who are also living with chronic illness that requires attention, empathy, compassion, and patience. I have had to learn how to care for those close to me, while being realistic of my own limitations. That cliché of “you have you put your own oxygen mask on first” is true, and it also serves as inspiration. By keeping on top of my health and wellbeing, I’m more available to help loved ones who need it. All of this means that I need to be extremely comfortable with my medical providers. My relationship with my doctors is
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key to my ability to default to healthy. I have to talk openly and honestly about my sexual health. I have to share the most intimate parts of my sex-life with them in order for these healthcare providers to know how to respond to any potentia issues. Sadly, this openness and honesty requires bravery on the part of patients like myself. Yes, bravery, because sometimes, providers aren’t as queer friendly we need them to be. For LGBTQ people living with HIV, it’s critical that we find providers who are queer- affirming, non-judgmental, and who are up-to-speed on treatment and preventative options like PrEP. These providers can be hard to find, especially if you’re not in a big city, and I think most LGBTQ people have a story about an uncomfortable or traumatic medical encounter, either due to a provider’s ignorance or, worse, outright prejudice. Encounters like these are harmful, as they may discourage the regular visits, check-ups, and screenings that are needed to maintain one’s health. In a perfect world, there would be a button or filter option on major patient matching sites, so we could easily see which doctors are LGBTQ-friendly. That’s the call of the ongoing campaign, # WeNeedAButton , launched by DatingPositives. com, a dating site for people with STIs. At DatingPositives.com, we also are concerned with the issues facing those managing STIs. Going to the doctor makes us vulnerable to being stigmatized twice. The campaign is designed to keep all of these elements in mind, with a simple solution: a button to identify queer-friendly doctors. But, for now, the burden is on us to find these doctors. Queer-friendly doctors do exist, and once you find a provider who is right for you, the rest becomes so much easier. It’s worth searching for, and hopefully soon we will have that button. For more info on the campaign and to read other stories, head over here to Waxoh.com Josh Robbins is a spokesperson for DatingPositives.com, an award-winning sexual health advocate, and author of the site imstilljosh.com. He was nominated for a GLAAD media award in 2017 and recently won the National Lesbian and Gay Journalist Association’s Excellence Award in the blogging category.
, e g a m I y d o B , d o o h n a Wom y
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ELLIE COBURN
Womanhood is a minefield. You’re expected to juggle friendship, family, love, sex,
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and work, while remaining beautiful, sexy, and thin. You need to balance a sea of contradictory expectations gracefully. The pressure of living up to society’s impossibly high standards can take a massive toll on self-esteem. A study conducted by researcher Wiebke Bleidorn and her colleagues found that men have higher self-esteem than women worldwide. This gap begins in adolescence and continues into adulthood. This difference is even more pronounced in individualist countries like the U.S. If culture has such a significant impact on self-confidence, how does LGBTQ culture measure up? I asked five LGBTQ women some questions about their body image and self-esteem. Lo R. expressed that constantly seeing skinny girls in the media has been a major contributing factor to her disordered eating and body image issues. The saturation of ‘perfect’ bodies, whether they’re skinny or thick, in the media is a major trigger for eating disorders.
AUGUST 2019
The National Eating Disorders Association says that at as early as age 12 gay, lesbian and bisexual children “may be at a higher risk of binge-eating and purging than their heterosexual peers.” LGBTQ people are at a higher risk of body image issues and eating disorders partly because of a lack of representation. Popular media teaches us how the world works and where we fit in it. If people have access to representation, they’re less likely to feel that there’s something inherently wrong with them. Even LGBTQ media still has a long way to go as far as body positivity. Ray V. brought up Boo from Orange is the New Black. She wanted to like her: she’s a fat butch lesbian after all. But it turns out she’s predatory. Additionally, Lo R. explained that in the book Love, Simon Leah was fat, but she was played by a thin actress in the movie. Instead of looking to our media for representation, we can look inward. Accepting who you are can significantly improve your confidence. You are more than the sum of your body parts. Instead of focusing on your physical features, remember that you are a unique individual with a range of special characteristics. Personally, embracing my lesbianism has been incredibly freeing. I felt a massive set of expectation lifted from my shoulders. I no longer felt the need to fit into the extremely narrow mold of womanhood that is presented in our heteronormative society. Everybody I spoke with felt that embracing their gender and sexuality has affected their self-esteem in one way or another. Embracing her identity as a femme lesbian has made Lo R. less worried about her body shape and more focused on her style. Jordan L. thinks that excepting their sexuality has positively affected their self-esteem, while their embracing gender is more of a mixed bag because “ I’m non-binary and sometimes parts of my body contribute to dysphoria.” Ray V. said that “there is something to be said for seeing the physical qualities you see in yourself in someone else and finding them attractive.” Having a support system is an important aspect of maintaining your self-confidence, and where better to look for this support than within our own community? Karen Heffernan’s 1996 study, “Eating Disorders and Weight Concern Among Lesbi-
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ans,” found that lesbians are not immune “from the effects of not meeting societal ideals of thinness.” Don’t worry! There is good news! She did find that the more active lesbians were within the LGBTQ community, the less concerned they were about their weight. Likewise, involvement in the LGBTQ community has had a positive impact on the self-esteem of everyone I spoke to. Abi B said that more she’s gotten involved in the LGBTQ community, the more her body image and self-esteem have improved. Jordan L. thinks that their involvement “helps put body image into perspective, especially hearing from other LGBT people, particularly trans people, how their body image affects them.” Ray V expressed that fat women (“especially fat women of color who have always been the most radical champions of body acceptance”) taught her that she was worthy of existing and being loved. Accepting your body is a deeply personal experience. There is no one-size-fits-all formula for body confidence. However, we can always learn from others’ experiences. I asked the people I interviewed to share their methods on curating and maintaining a positive body image. “My advice would be to not be so hard on yourself. Have a support group of people that will help boost your confidence and empower you.”
Lo R (she/her) “Learning to listen to yourself is important. Whether it’s “I’m hungry, and this is what I want,” or “this is what I want to wear even if it’s ‘unflattering.’” Ray V. (she/her) “Make a list of all the things you like about yourself. Practice talking yourself, even if you don’t believe the things you’re saying, you soon will.” Jordan L. (they/them) “My main tip is to try to love what makes you unique because likely that’s the stuff that’s not being represented, so it’s really important that you love those things yourself.” Abi B. (she/her) My final thought is that there are some basic things we can do to further free ourselves from societal norns: uninstall FaceTune, eat that piece of cake, wear what you want, take that selfie, and just go hang out with your LGBTQ friends.
Tori H. (she/her) “For me, it’s been finding value in myself that doesn’t come from what I look like, as well as valuing my body for keeping me alive rather than being nice to look at.”
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