O&AN | January 2015

OUTANDABOUT NASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

VOLUME 14 | ISSUE 01

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LETTER

from the

This month, Out & About Nashville has focused on two serious issues as we begin a new year: addiction in the LGBT community and issues facing LGBT immigrants. Both of these issues are intimately related to problems of identity in ways that are very telling for our community.

Brian Sullivan explores the harmful effects of addiction on LGBT people, focusing in particular on the meth epidemic that has so deeply afflicted our region. To get to the heart of the matter, he talked in depth with a gay man and a lesbian at different stages in their addiction: the man is in recovery and the woman hasn’t yet begun the process. In both cases, he identifies a weak sense of self as a primary cause for addictive behaviors.

The difficulties LGBT people face, then, in terms bullying and lack of social acceptance may break down the psychological barriers to abuse. In future issues of O&AN, look for a continuing focus on addiction.

In our coverage on immigration, we take a closer look at the lives of immigrants and the way that LGBT identity shapes and informs the experiences of immigrants in Nashville.

Three men of different cultural and ethnic backgrounds—and who came to the U.S. via very different paths—open up about the way that their lives have been impacted by being part of, and often torn between, two definite identities. In some surprising ways, their

EDITOR

LGBT immigrant identity causes conflict not with those they meet in their new home, but with those with whom they share deep roots.

We then look at ways in which the U.S., and Nashville in particular, are striving to meet the needs of the most vulnerable immigrants, the undocumented LGBT or those with particular needs. We spoke to Stephanie Teatro, interim co-director of the Tennessee Immigrant & Refugee Rights Coalition, about her organizations advocacy, as well as about President Obama’s Executive Action and why LGBT people are among those who benefit least from it.

We also spoke to Renata Soto, executive director and co-founder of Conexión Américas, about how Conexión and the community center it led the drive to establish are serving the needs of immigrants, including LGBT families and youth, in Middle Tennessee. Look for updates on this exciting organization online in the coming weeks.

We often behave as if addicts and immigrants are distant “others” unless we’ve faced the issues ourselves, or experienced them indirectly with loved ones. We hope that by bringing the experiences of both groups closer to home, we can increase our community’s understanding of problem that really are not other but our own. @jamesallengrady

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Writers: Gary Bradshaw, Thomas Brodhead, Jane Dupree, James Grady, Amy E. Hall, Amy Sulam, Brian Sullivan, Cody Tracey, Bobbi Williams Photographers: Lisa V. Connor, James Grady, Julius Greene, Chris Walburn Cover/Feature Photographer: Chris Walburn Cartoon: Damon Xanthopoulos National Advertising Representative: Rivendell Media 1248 Route 22 West Mountainside, NJ 07092 212-242-6863

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LEGAL Out & About Nashville strives to be a credible community news organization by engaging and educating our readers. All content of Out & About Nashville is copyrighted 2014 by Out & About Nashville, Inc. and is protected by federal copyright law and shall not be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. All photography is licensed stock imagery or has been supplied unless otherwise credited to a photographer and may not be reproduced without permission. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers and cartoonists published herein is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or pictorial representations does not necessarily indicate the sexual orientation of the person or persons.

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OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

There are a lot of ways to measure a good story: quality of writing, subject matter, and appeal. Heck, quality of page design might even come into play. But there’s one metric that’s objective, but it’s hard to pinpoint in print: how many people read the story!

Thanks to our online platform, however, we at O&AN can pinpoint exactly which of our stories was most read online between January 1—December 20, 2014 (read, but not necessarily posted, because there were some big surprises). So, we present to you our Ten Hottest Stories in 2014, from least to most read:

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“Remembering Curt Bucy: Nashville mourns unexpected loss” Nearly a year ago, O&AN memorialized the death of a former volunteer contributor, who is still sorely missed.

“Why I canceled my YMCA membership” This oldie, originally published in 2006, still gets thousands of views a year. We can’t imagine why a story about sex in a YMCA gym in Nashville would be so interested….

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“Murfreesboro bar announces LGBT Thursdays, Fridays and looks toward full-time: ‘This could be bigger than we ever imagined’” This could have

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“Gizzy Fowler, a transwoman, murdered in North Nashville: Mainstream news coverage downplays sexuality, trans identity” This tragic murder,

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been bigger, yes. But it wasn’t. Ignite went part gay, then all gay, then it went away.

just weeks before the Transgender Day of Remembrance, shocked the Nashville LGBT community. But we still have not seen #JusticeForGizzy.

“Knoxville couple’s viral engagement photos generate fury, hope” When

Kyle Bandermann and Lance Buchanan’s engagement generated millions of views, they weren’t interested in talking about their story too much.

Until O&AN asked the right questions.

“More Trouble in the Gayborhood: Early Morning Fight Bloodies Church Street” Summer seemed to bring a wave of discontent, and even danger,

to Nashville’s LGBT neighborhoods. Thankfully, it was a series of unfortunate events that did not continue.

“‘Turn the Gays Away’ Bill: What it does and what you can do” Tennessee zealots sought to protect innocent right wing bigots from having to serve the LGBT community. They lost. Let’s make sure they lose next year.

“Opinion: In Defense of Pastor Robby Gallaty (Well, Sort of...)” Sometimes

you feel like a nut, and sometimes you don’t. And sometimes you step into the middle of a viral fray between the LGBT community and a Baptist minister in Chattanooga, and everyone thinks you’re on the wrong side.

“Hal Sparks up close and personal” In perhaps the biggest upset of the

year, our second most read article on our site, with thousands of unique viewers in the last twelve months, has been online since 2007!

“Setting Josey Greenwell Straight: The Artist Formerly Known as Gay”

We don’t believe in outing people. But when you come out and brag about being out in Nashville, and cater to the LGBT community for support— and claim to be a role model for LGBT youth—don’t try to go back in the closet and sell yourself as hetero. And really don’t do it IN THE SAME TOWN. @O U T A N D A B O U T N A S H

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January 15 to 17

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January 30

CLASSICAL SERIES

GREGORY PORTER January 23

Featuring 28 years of music from Nintendo’s phenomenal video game series, with video projected in HD on giant screens.

One of today’s hottest new jazz artists, this GRAMMY®winning singer makes his first Nashville appearance.

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February 5 to 7

February 13 & 14

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Rogers Waters, the creative force of Pink Floyd, narrates his epic opera set during the French Revolution.

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Classic rock anthems including “Come Sail Away,” “Lady,” “Renegade,” “Fooling Yourself,” “Blue Collar Man” & more.

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OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

THE RIGHT STRIKES BACK

“TURN AWAY THE GAYS” BILLS RETURN TO THE AGENDA JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

In December, Michigan’s State House of Representatives sent renewed shockwaves through LGBT communities across the country with its handling of House Bill 5958, which was rushed through the Michigan House Judiciary Committee and a full chamber vote in a single day.

Like the Tennessee bill narrowly defeated last year, Michigan’s bill was modeled on the Federal “Religious Freedom and Restoration Act” (RFRA).

Passed under Bill Clinton, the RFRA was an attempt to protect religious minorities by prohibiting laws that “substantially burden” the sincerely held religious beliefs of citizens, unless the government can *prove* that such a law serves a compelling government interest that cannot be accomplished by less restrictive means. Since the Supreme Court determined in 1997 that the RFRA did not apply to states, nineteen state governments have passed their own version of the law.

Recent interest in passing such laws, however, has been driving by a Republican goal of protecting members of the majority religion from having to serve LGBT minorities. Often proposed in the name of shielding Christian bakers and florists from being forced to provide services in support of LGBT weddings that they morally oppose, these laws are often so broadly worded that they open up endless implications.

LGBT rights organizations and blogs worldwide raised awareness of Michigan’s law with provocative headlines like NewNowNext’s: “Michigan House Passed Bill Allowing EMTs

to Refuse Treatment to Gay People.”

However, the government does have a compelling interest in emergency medical care, and laws penalizing inaction in such situations are the direct route to achieving that end. Thus, laws governing EMTs do not actually fall afoul of the RFRA, and it is unlikely that any possible legal justification would allow EMTs to refuse treatment.

While the headlines may be overblown, at best using worst-case scenarios, the result they fear is very plausible. If an uninformed EMT believed the RFRA shielded him from legal action should he decide to withhold care from an emergency case, he would most probably be wrong. But that he would be punished for his inaction is of little consolation to the person who died because the EMT rejected his duty.

Chris Sanders, executive director of the Tennessee Equality Project (TEP), points to a slightly less extreme example with a similar potential for dire harm. “With regard to everything from weddings to essential care, think of small communities with single providers of services. What happens when you have no reliable access to long-distance transportation to seek alternatives when refused essential services? In the city, a patient could walk to the next nearest

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John Waide, PhD, LCSW 615/400.5911 waide@psychotherapy-and-psychoanalysis.com Barbara Sanders, LCSW 615/414.2553 BarbaraSandersLCSW@gmail.com Music Row / Vanderbilt Area

pharmacy for his HIV meds, but if a rural mom and pop pharmacist won’t fill the prescription, it could lead to a lack of compliance, with long term health impacts. The ability to decide whether to serve and moral judgment combined could lead to deadly consequence.”

Michigan sounds an alarm bell: 2015 is likely to see a flurry of new attempts to pass RFRAs across the country, even in places where they have already been defeated. There is a national movement that has not abandoned passing a new RFRA in Tennessee. In fact, Cathi Herrod, who was instrumental in Arizona’s attempt to pass a “turn the gays away” bill, was brought to Chattanooga and Nashville by the Family Action Council of Tennessee to galvanize supporters for a long-term fight. Sanders sees signs that “the other side is preparing for this kind of bill. If the Sixth Circuit had ruled in our favor the bill would already be filed, but I think we’ll see it anyway.”

On the other hand, he said, it’s possible that the legislature “will have its hands full with abortion, taxes, and common core. This could mean they don’t have time for anything else, or it could mean that so much energy is being spent on the fight over those three areas that

Chris Sanders, Executive Director, Tennessee Equality Project

they can rush through a ‘turn the gays away’ bill.”

It’s important that Tennesseans be prepared to mobilize against a new RFRA in Tennessee. Last year, putting a face on the impacts of the bill made all the difference, and Sanders said, “We’re going to need couples and individuals to step forward to talk about the impact on their life. Last year this helped shape the media narrative and drove the original sponsor away from the bill.” It’s also important to encourage the businesses we frequent to sign on with the “Equality Means Business” program, since a strong business response is a powerful counter.

It’s essential that these bills be fought.

“If they pass,” Sanders explained, “it could take years to remove these laws from the books. The courts are unlikely to act on this when they’ve finally moved on marriage. It might take decades for the courts to strike down RFRAs, and longer if it’s left to the states. People need to be afraid and motivated: getting rid of them could be a nightmare.”

For more information, or to get involved, visit TEP.org, and follow the Tennessee Equality Project’s page on Facebook.

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INSIDE THE WORLD OF DRUGS, SEX AND JESUS IN THE GAY COMMUNITY

BRIAN SULLIVAN | @NashvilleScoop

Many of us have that friend that always has the Alice in Wonderland pill to provide just the right escape, from the potion that dims the insecurities left by that “ex-who-knows-what-we-were” to the “I-only-get-2-days-off-a-weekmake-it-count” pill that guarantees that all-night shirtless dancing doesn’t stop you from getting brunch with the girls.

Odds are, you or someone you know has tried some pill, potion, or powders—or at least once considered it. It’s almost innocuous in the gay world. Is it a club thing? Is it a peer pressure thing? Or is it really a GAY thing? The CDC reports that, compared with the general population, LGBT individuals are more likely to use, and abuse, alcohol and drugs, and to continue abuse into later life. But what makes this the case?

To find out, I knew I had to go to the source: people either in the grips of, or in recovery from, their addictions.

Several common denominators, along with a drug of choice, showed me a whole new dimension of what’s going on around us, in the midst of the winks and woofs.

During my investigation, I met two people—I’ll refer to them as Rose and Nick—who forever changed my perception of the epidemic. Each had a history of misconceptions, misunderstandings, and rejection.

COMING OUT, AND ABUSE

“Before I was adopted at the age of 6 I had lived in 9 different foster homes, but kept getting placed back with my mother,” she recalled. “I

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remember there was a blind lady that lived near us. I wanted to do something nice for her, so I took her mail and sat it on the porch for her so she didn’t have to walk to her box. But it ended up raining that day and ruined her mail.”

When Rose’s mother found out what Rose had done, she and her aunt tormented her, beating her on the leg with switches. “There was a friend of the family, a preacher in town, that agreed to take me in,” Rose said. “At first it was a very loving family. I was spoiled.”

Her dream of a loving family had come true, or so it seemed. Rose would suffer years of sexual abuse at the hand of her adoptive father. While she confided in her brother, she couldn’t identify the perpetrator. “He went to my parents,” said Rose. “He didn’t realize it was our father.” A concerned mother confronted Rose with her father there. The intimidation of his presence forced her into silence about the abuse.

Rose came out as bisexual to her mother when she was twelve, after years of physical, sexual and mental abuse, but her mother he didn’t know how to handle it. Living in a small town in Arkansas, she felt alone, like there were no other girls who liked girls. “My escape was Queer as Folk,” Rose said. “I stayed up until 10 and couldn’t WAIT to watch it. It was my only connection to the gay community.”

Nick also suffered sexual assault before turning to drug and alcohol abuse. His coming out story is like something out of a horror movie. “I

OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

was friends with a straight boy in high school. I think his girlfriend was away at band camp,” Nick reported. “He came over and we started drinking.” As the night progressed, Nick’s “friend” spiked his drink with Xanax and raped him.

He confided in another friend, who ended up telling the principal, who then called his parents. “I came out to my parents as gay while informing them someone who I thought was a friend had drugged and date raped me in our home,” Nick recalled.

FROM ABUSE TO ABUSE

Rose’s chemical abuse began when her group started bringing alcohol to school. “I would bring a Dr. Pepper bottle to school but I would mix it with bourbon, or Black Velvet whiskey,” Rose reported. No one knew because, according to Rose, it didn’t affect her performance in school. She was an A and B student until her junior and senior years when she began drinking heavily.

She soon moved to live with her sister, who faced an even darker addiction. “She would take her prescription pain medicine and drive for hours to Memphis and sell them so she could buy meth,” says Rose. Despite Rose’s pleading, her sister continued to abuse the drug until her death 2007—likely from health complications exacerbated by drug abuse. Rose then dropped out of college and immersed herself in Memphis’s gay nightlife. “I couldn’t get enough of it,” said Rose. “I had finally met people who loved and

accepted me for who I am.”

Immersion in the bar scene, and alcohol abuse, was Nick’s initial coping mechanism as well. “The only place we really have to meet other people like us is a bar,” Nick reflected. “Alcohol is … liquid courage. But there were some nights I would look back and ask myself what I did the last few hours.”

Rose was taken in and warned of the scene’s dangers by a drag queen at the club where Rose ended up working.

“She would tell me who to stay away from and who was okay,” Rose said.

“She’d tell me ‘that person’s not a good person. Stay away from them, honey, they will lead you down the wrong path.’” Her warnings fell on rebellious ears: “I was young. I was like ‘Who are you to tell me who I can and can’t hang out with’.”

ENTER: METH

Nick eventually started dating a prescription drug addict. “He had an addiction,” Nick said. “But honestly there are a lot of doctors out there that are nothing more than legal dealers.”

The choice for Nick’s boyfriend seemed between being drugged out or being sick. Nick and his boyfriend were convinced by a dealer that meth could help with the opiate withdrawals.

The two decided to do it together. “I was instantly hooked,” Nick admitted.

“I was able to kick my alcohol and weed addiction because all I wanted was meth.”

Rose too said she was immediately hooked, after one of the people she was warned against turned her on to meth: “I felt like I could stay up forever. And

when I was up, no one could sneak up on me. You can watch your own back.”

While Rose dabbled in other drugs, but none were as satisfying as meth. Meth also gave Rose a sense of clarity. “I can remember things, and I’m able to carry on a conversation. When I use, I am the loud girl who doesn’t care what anybody thinks,” says Rose. “A lot of times I feel like I don’t make real connections, though. Like they’re connecting with [that loud girl] and not me.”

DEEP IN THE SCENE

Both she and Nick eventually graduated from using to handling. “I was a runner,” says Rose. “If we had gotten caught, I would’ve taken the fall, but I never paid for the drugs.” After he started dealing and realized who was using, Nick started to find it more socially acceptable. He saw it wasn’t just a “redneck, trailer trash” sort of drug. “College professors, judges, Senators, guys pulling up to buy it in their $80,000 Mercedes,” says Nick.

Nick and his boyfriend began engaging in chemsex, which involves the use meth or other concoctions to enhance sexual pleasure. “Some of the best orgasms I’ve ever had were on meth,” says Nick. “You feel comfortable, and your inhibitions go out the door.”

Experts have warned that participants in chemsex face a multitude of dangers, from losing inhibitions and putting yourself at risk for rape and a number of STD’s to significant, long-term side effects.

But the psychological impacts should not be minimized. “I always felt very lonely and very empty afterword,” Nick reflects.

Both ended up spinning out of control. “One time I smoked 3 grams in 2 days,” says Rose. “I didn’t know you had to drink water. I was dehydrated.”

“I ended up getting arrested after my boyfriend cooked meth in our home,” says Nick. “You think you’re being slick. But your friends and family know.”

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FINDING HELP

Nick eventually found help in, of all places, a Christian rehabilitation program. “I was skeptical at first,” says Nick. “But everyone at Addiction Campuses of Tennessee (ACT) was very welcoming to me and very helpful.

And I feel loved and accepted here.”

Located in the hills of Rutherford County, ACT was where Nick learned

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to loosen himself from the grips of addiction. “It’s not what you’d expect,” says Nick. “I was accepted with open arms. Not all Christians are closed minded.”

Erik Hines, a Christian minister in recovery and the President of ACT, says their program is not about condoning or judging any lifestyle. “It’s not our

Erik Hines

I learned a lot from Nick and Rose, first and foremost the value of selfesteem in our community: A true gay pride of who you are and where you are going. A voice that says if I don’t do this, it’s okay. A voice that says no matter what my government says, I’m a human being. And the courage to be nothing more and nothing less, than who we are.

– Brian Sullivan

Brian Sullivan

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manages her addiction daily.

“It’s not something that’s easy, but it’s possible to maintain for a little while,” says ACT spokesperson Julie Eisenbeck of meth addiction. “It is an addiction that alters the brain so that when someone IS using they are at peace and comfortable, but when they are not they’re miserable. The problem

debate to have,” says Hines. “We are about helping people and giving them the tools they need to set them free from their addiction.”

Nick, who is in recovery, says eventually he got sick and tired of being sick and tired. Rose, who used shortly before our interview, says she

OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

is the use of the drug must escalate to achieve the same results. More meth kills the body. Too much meth kills the soul. The end result is always death.”

CONCLUSION

Nick and Rose were both victims of sexual assault. Both came from

small towns, and felt isolated at a very young age. And lastly, neither had a sense of self that empowered them to “just say no.” The difficulties that many LGBT people face growing up create these common conditions. Many come from homes where they are not accepted, live in a world that doesn’t fully acknowledge protect or extend love to LGBT people. Sometimes we act flamboyant or do outrageous things to build our sense of self. When we find acceptance, it is almost impossible to resist pressures that brings.

After our interview, Rose, who had used not long before our interview, reached out to ask for ACT’s number, but as of this writing, Rose has not called. Nick, meanwhile, is doing well in recovery and will graduate from ACT’s program soon and move into transitional living.

I’m proud to work for addiction treatment campus that accepts and heals our baggage no matter where we put our junk.

If you are or know someone who is fighting the disease of addiction, you can contact our helpline at 1.888.614.2251 or log onto www. addictioncampuses.com.

Wedding Announcement

Dawn Haltom & Lana Sutherland Haltom

The license allowed Lana, who took Dawn’s name, to change her name with Social Security and her passport with the wedding license, since both are under the jurisdiction of federal departments. With regard to many other services, the Haltoms faced many of the same difficulties as other LGBT Tennesseans who marry out of state.

Unlike straight couples, who may use out of state marriage licenses to handle name changes to make their state issued documents match up with their federal counterparts, Lana had to undertake the process of changing her name through the courts. In Wilson County, the fee for this runs $187, and in a case like Lana’s, this constitutes a marriage tax.

Photography: Lisa V. Connor

In October, long-time partners Dawn Haltom and Lana Sutherland decided to make it official. “Over the twenty years we have been together,” Dawn said, “we talked on and off about getting married.

At first, we contemplated just having a commitment ceremony, since we couldn’t have a legally recognized wedding. We’ve always wanted to have some sort of public acknowledgement of our relationship, which we intended to last for life.

After DOMA was overturned, we began seriously considering the possibility of going out of state to get married.”

Having narrowed the date down to sometime in October, the couple decided on Vermont for a number of reasons. “From there we decided on somewhere in New England,” Dawn explained, “since the autumn leaves would be amazing. We had decided that we really wanted to honeymoon in Montreal, so we honed in on Vermont due to its proximity to the city.”

Originally, a couple of longtime friends were going to accompany

them as witnesses. “Somewhat unexpectedly, family members indicated their interest in going with us also. We have always felt supported by our families, but we were blown away by the fact they would fly all the way to Vermont for our wedding.”

The Lilac Inn in Brandon, Vermont, was the venue they chose.

The Lilac is very experienced with weddings of all sizes, and the town of Brandon has everything one needs. “Gourmet Provence made our beautiful cake. Carr’s Florist did the flowers. The reception dinner was prepared by Lilac Inn,” Dawn said. “Doug and Shelly Sawyer are the owners/innkeepers, and they are amazing. Our wedding officiant was Laura Peterson, a Justice of the Peace.”

Dawn and Lana said they found Vermonters to be friendly and supportive. “They are proud of the fact that Vermont was one of the first states to have marriage equality. When our marriage license arrived in the mail, the envelope was full of rainbow glitter confetti!” Dawn described with excitement.

Dear Out and About Nashville readers, we would love to receive photos and announcements for other Middle Tennessee LGBTQ weddings or engagements.

While we cannot guarantee print placement for every submission, we look forward to sharing your joy with our readers. @jamesallengrady

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FRESH FROM THE VINE

ELEVATED AMERICAN CUISINE COMES TO EAST NASHVILLE JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

The Vine is the brainchild and shared passion of Greg Swafford and Chef Luke Belsito. Together the men have developed a restaurant committed to offering what Swafford describes as “fresh, traditional, modern American, with a wide variety of wines for all palates and budgets. We want to serve people the best food, and show them how wine can develop the flavor of that food.”

Combined, Swafford and Belsito have decades of experience in large restaurant management. The men met midcareer at Texas Roadhouse, where Swafford was in purchasing and Belsito was culinary director. But years would pass, and the men would work their way through numerous executive positions, before they worked together again.

When Swafford found himself at Landry’s as vice president in charge of purchasing, he decided that Houston wasn’t for him and decided to explore an old dream. So he began exploring the idea of opening his own restaurant in Nashville, where he grew up (Swafford grew up on a farm in Gallatin and played high school football there). Finding a chef with whom he could share his vision seemed as if it would prove tougher.

When Swafford reached out to Belsito for recommendations, however, he found the chef ready both to try his hand at something new and to return to his roots.

Belsito actually got his start in the kitchens of Nashville’s San Antonio Taco Co., as well as Granite Falls, before heading off to the Culinary Institute of America (where he was a classmate of Chef Margot McCormack).

Sharing a passion for Nashville and

for food, Swafford and Belsito have a simple philosophy at The Vine: “Fresh, modern American food, paired with exceptional wine.” Or as Belsito put it, “We’ll be as cool and hip as we can, while staying true to our commitments. We could make our food a lot fancier, but not a lot fresher. We don’t use unnecessarily

talented cooks, whose creative recipes utilizing at-hand, fresh ingredients sometimes make their way onto the day’s menu. I found one of these—the poblano, pineapple, and sweet pepper soup—intriguing enough to try. The creamy, sweet potato base was elevated complexly by the simple blend of

exotic ingredients: we aim for a clean flavor profile.”

I had the opportunity to try a number of dishes that exemplified the restaurant’s mission. On special was a salmon dip, made with trimmings from the Scottish salmon the restaurant has flown in, and served with cucumber and crostini. The dish was mostly salmon, with a light and unobtrusive creaminess and flavored only by chives and sweet red peppers. The light, fresh flavor of the dip was extraordinary.

Both Swafford and Belsito are committed to training and developing

ingredients, yielding a sweet, but not too sweet, perfectly spiced soup, perfect for a cold day.

For the main course, I tried both the “Denver Lamb Chops,” as well as the “Shrimp & Grits Creole” from the standard menu. I was doubly impressed.

First, the lamb was superb: my seven-yearold raced me to each bite of the tender, flavorful, perfectly medium-rare lamb, which was served on al dente, cooked-toorder asiago risotto. The shrimp dish was masterfully executed: I’ve often ordered a traditionally spicy dish in a high-end

restaurant only to find it under-spiced. The shrimp’s creole seasoning was excellent, spicy but not uncomfortably so, and the bacon-cheddar grits were cheesy enough to let me know a Southerner had been in the kitchen.

The climax of the meal, however, was the flourless chocolate torte, topped with chocolate Marconi almond gelato (made in-house). If you are a chocoholic, I guarantee you that climax would be no hyperbole. I tend toward fruity desserts (all jokes aside, it’s true) and yet here was a chocolate dish I would cross rivers to eat, even if I had no intention of enjoying a meal!

The food at vine would qualify—in my book—as fine dining, in terms of quality. But both men were careful to avoid the term “fine dining.” Indeed, they explicitly repudiated the term. “We want people to know,” Swafford said, “that people can feel comfortable coming here for a nice date, for a birthday celebration, or just to have a good time. Consistently excellent food and wine doesn’t have to be intimidating.”

Indeed, they go out of their way to be welcoming. Swafford made a point of saying that if they know in advance of special dietary needs or concerns, the restaurant can create a menu, and they have trained their staff to avoid cross contamination when they are made aware of allergies. “We just want people to know we’re a restaurant for everyone,” Swafford explained.

To find out more about the restaurant, or to peruse the menu, visit their website at www.v-thevine.com.

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A BRAVE NEW SOUND FOR MUSIC CITY

For its inaugural season, Intersection is slated to perform two programs. The first, scheduled for March 26 at Platform Event Center, will include a mixed-ensemble-version of Estonian composer Arvo Pärt’s Fratres, American composer Sean Shepherd’s Metamorphoses, British composer Johnathan Harvey’s Valley of Aoasta, Russian composer Sofia Gubaidalina’s Concordanza, and American composer Ned Rorem’s THOMAS BRODHEAD the concert-going public. Intersection Eleven Studies for Eleven Instruments.

Nashville is experiencing a cultural will emphasize (1) innovative The tonal Pärt is paralleled by the renaissance as its demographics and programming reflecting the stylistic more dissonant Gubaidalina, as each values change in proportion to its range of living composers, (2) nonpopulation expansion. Classical music traditional, ever-changing performance is a meditative work that approaches the same spiritual state via different has been on the upswing here for many venues, (3) collaborations with artists harmonic languages. Shepherd, an years, and the acoustic perfection emerging young composer, will of the Schermerhorn Hall seems to be present for the performance of beckon grass-roots efforts to complete his work, and therefore will be the classical circuit in Music City. available for Q&A following the One missing component has been a concert. Harvey’s work—a depiction contemporary ensemble, typically a group of 20–30 players who specialize in small-to-medium sized works by living composers (Ensemble Intercontemporain and Speculum Musicae are good examples of such ensembles).

The prime mover of a bold effort to fill in that niche is Kelly Corcoran, of snowstorms, avalanches, and eight-year director of the Nashville thunderstorms—will be complemented Symphony Chorus and founder by corresponding film visuals selected of the Nashville Philharmonic. A

by Zeitgeist Gallery. The program’s Massachusetts native who studied instrumental finale by Ned Rorem— music at Bloomington and in Boston, one of the first openly gay American Corcoran has an impressive pedigree: composers, and a composer better she’s conducted over a dozen in related fields, such as dance or orchestras in America and abroad, visual art, and (4) family concerts that known and beloved for his art songs— will be complemented by interpretive and—importantly—has studied expose young ears to new sounds. dance by New Dialect dance company. conducting with Leonard Slatkin and This fourth goal is perhaps the most The second program, scheduled Pierre Boulez, both champions of new important, as studies have proven that for June 7 at the Green Door Gourmet, music. exposure to classical music at a young is a family concert with activities Her new project is Intersection, a age—either by learning an instrument before and after the show (including 15–20 player contemporary ensemble or by attending concerts—is the most free samples of locally hived honey). with a “Composer Ambassador”: an important factor that determines The program begins with British affiliated composer who will interface whether someone is receptive to composer Oliver Knussen’s Hums and with local composers, musicians, and classical music as an adult.

INTERSECTION SHOWCASES LIVING COMPOSERS

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Songs of Winnie the Pooh, for which maestro Corcoran will conduct the ensemble and sing the lead vocal role.

This is followed by Italian composer Luciano Berio’s Opus Number Zoo, in which players alternate between playing their instruments and narrating charming animal stories.

American composer Bruce Adolphe’s Tyrannosaurus Sue rounds out the program. Written for the Chicago Field Museum’s installation of “Sue,” the most complete T-Rex skeleton ever discovered, this work is a fanciful depiction of Sue’s life in the Cretaceous period. Like Prokofiev’s Peter and the Wolf, the work is narrated, with instruments in the ensemble representing characters in Sue’s life story.

Funding for Intersection’s inaugural season is not yet complete.

In fact, an ambitious campaign to raise

the $35,000 needed for the first concert was being pursued via Indiegogo.

The webpage includes an informative video introducing viewers to Corcoran and the people working alongside her to make Intersection a reality. At the time of this writing, however, only 19% of the necessary funds have been pledged (with a looming December 29 deadline). If the campaign is not successful, Corcoran intends to pursue other methods of funding in the new year so that Intersection’s programs will take place as planned.

For full information about Intersection, visit www.intersectionmusic.org.

“THREE”– IS IT COMPANY OR A CROWD?

NEW NASHVILLE-BASED WEB SERIES EXPLORES GAY NON-MONOGAMY CODY TRACEY

A new web series, THREE, is focusing on a common issue facing gay couples— non-monogamy, and the possibilities of polyamory—head-on. As interest in the show is building, with coverage from outlets as diverse as Huffington Post and Spanish-language, gay entertainment blog Ambiente G, Jeff Swafford, the series’ producer/writer/director sat down to talk with O&AN about his production company, the series, and why Nashville is home to it all.

His production company, Woodland, is a “currently a one man operation.”

Swafford notes that he has “years of production experience from working in the film industry in Los Angeles and I decided to jump in with both feet, hire a cast and crew, and go for it. My goal was to develop a team that I work with time and time again and I’m off to a great start because I love the cast and crew I assembled for THREE.” When he was asked about the inspiration behind the show he divulged

that it all started with a photo essay that he saw that depicted three men living together in a polyamorous relationship, and it got the ball rolling. “This idea has been with me for a long time, and through the years many things have happened in my own relationship and in the relationships of people I know that have added weight to the story. I realized how many people were dealing with the issue of monogamy, and I wanted to tell a story that really explored what happens to a relationship when a third person is introduced.”

So how does this story play out?

You’ll just have to tune in to Three to find out! As of this writing, two episodes of the first season’s six have been released on the THREE’s website. Swafford also mentioned that the second season, which will conclude the series, is slated to be filmed in early spring. Future projects that we can look forward to include a drama, Crazy All These Years, which will enter production this summer.

Swafford’s productions feature all-local talent, from their actors to the

musical sounds of bands like Indiana Queen. This should come as no surprise, as Jeff himself is originally from Nashville. “I moved to Los Angeles from Nashville twenty-one years ago and recently decided to move back with my husband in May. Personally it has been a very easy transition coming back after so many years away - it felt like home right from the start. But I didn’t really know what to expect in terms of the production community in Nashville. I was pleasantly surprised to see that it is flourishing.”

Swafford’s surprise was based on his own experience. “I had never worked on a film production outside of Los Angeles,” he explained. One thing he discovered was that working in Nashville has its own distinct advantage, at least for his own working style. “I love the laid back feel I experienced shooting in Nashville. It’s a tight knit community. Everyone seems to know one another, especially among the actors, and I look forward to doing more projects and growing as a part of that community.”

Well, Nashville is glad to have you back Jeff, and we’re glad that you’re raising the profile of both the Nashville web production scene, as well as the LGBT community.

To keep up with the web series, visit their website (www.threewebseries.com) or Facebook page (www.facebook.com/ threewebseries).

@O U T A N D A B O U T N A S H

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The Thousand-Petaled Lotus: Growing Up Gay in the Southern Baptist Church Author: Michael Fields Publisher: Langdon Street Press (June 17, 2014) Language: English 292 pages.

choosing and legally married to his longtime partner. Much took place along the journey that connects Mike, the boy, with Michael, the man—some of which he describes in his memoir, The Thousand-Petaled Lotus, which details Fields’ life from grade school

most pivotal moments, he remembers the night he met his celebrity crush, David Bowie, at Nashville’s Municipal Auditorium, where he served as an usher as a teen.

By the time he met Bowie, though, Fields had already reached a new level of enlightenment. “‘God Knows I’m Good,’ sang David Bowie, and God knew that I was good. God did not care what my religion was, and he did not care that I was gay.”

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“F AV O

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For more information about the author and his work, visit www.MichaelFields.com.

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through high school, with a hint of what was to come.

As a child, Fields, now 58, loved to visit the Parthenon in Nashville’s Centennial Park. “The Parthenon was a very special place to me when I was a child, and I always go back now to see Athena, now that she’s there.” In his own small way, he helped to fund the Athena installment. “When my grandmother would take us there—me and my siblings and my cousin—and when their backs were turned, I would take whatever money I had in my pocket and I would stuff it into the [donation] coin slot. I wanted a big statue of Athena.”

Not surprisingly, growing up gay in the Southern Baptist Church was difficult. “[Coming out to yourself], of course, was a very torturous thing when you’re part of the Southern Baptist Church…as a young adolescent, I prayed to Jesus constantly that He would cure me of being a homosexual…

It’s not that I was praying daily,” he remembers.

“I was praying hourly, praying half-hourly, praying just constantly because there was no way to reconcile what I felt myself becoming and what my religion said I was allowed to be.”

It wasn’t until late in his high school career that he began to examine his inherited beliefs, thanks, in part, to an influential teacher. “[My McGavock Comprehensive High School drama teacher] Kent Cathcart…is a devout Catholic and he is a follower of every religion ever known to man, on top of it,” Fields explains. “He really was one of those teachers—we all hope we have one— who introduces you to a world that’s

LA

AMY E. HALL

New York resident Michael Fields was born and raised in Nashville. He returned to Music City in October to speak at The Southern Festival of Books in support of his memoir, The Thousand-Petaled Lotus: Growing Up Gay in the Southern Baptist Church, which was released in June. I spoke with him by phone in anticipation of the Nashville event.

Michael Fields is a perfect candidate for an “It Gets Better” segment. A closeted gay boy in Nashville, steeped in the Southern Baptist tradition, longing for love, Fields would become an openly gay man in New York City, deeply committed to the beliefs of his

EI

MICHAEL FIELDS DETAILS HIS JOURNEY IN HIS MEMOIR

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FROM BAPTIST BROTHER TO BOWIE LOVER

bigger than the world that you grew up in. Because he was born and raised as a Southern Baptist in Nashville, himself, but he had gone to Columbia [University], as I would later go to Columbia…and to get his Ph.D. at the University of Southern California. He had gotten out and seen the world,” Fields recounts. “And so I began to, under his tutelage…question my religion.”

An interesting mix of metaphysical musings and a retelling of his burgeoning self-awareness, the memoir’s characters come alive, particularly those we meet during Fields’s high school years. Among the

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LGBT IMMIGRANTS OPEN UP ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCE

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Our cover model, Benji Camarena Garcia, is from Mexico. He came to the U.S. by bus from Guadalajara, Mexico, just two-and-a-half years ago, entering legally on a work visa.

“I came to Nashville to work at a Mexican restaurant owned by some distant family members,” he explained.

“I could not speak any English, but have learned a lot and have taken some ESL classes at Vol State. I started out as a runner and worked my way up to server.” Life hasn’t been easy. “It was

hours a day.”

Coming to America has brought Benji freedom to open up about his sexual identity, but there are limits. “I have made no secret of being at my workplace or to anyone I have met here in the United States. My coworkers have generally been very accepting and supportive,” he said. “But the Mexican culture is very macho and Catholic, so it’s not generally supportive of being gay. My family doesn’t know I’m gay, but I have close friends from Mexico that are aware.”

“The culture here generally seems to be

U.S., but because of my dad’s family’s connections, they took us away from my mom, and I grew up with my paternal grandparents.”

Neglected by his father, Lagunas suffered years of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse at the hands of other family members. When he was twelve and finally told his mother about the abuse, she went back to Mexico and took her son, bringing him illegally to Nashville to shield him from his father’s influential family. When he came here, he, like Garcia, had no knowledge of English. But Lagunas’ mother had established a strong

more accepting,” Benji confirms. But among fellow immigrants here, there are difficulties. “In the Mexican subculture here, it can be very hard to be openly gay as a Mexican.”

JF Lagunas can well attest to this. He was brought to this country as a child in 2005. “There were a lot of factors [that brought me here],” he explained. His father’s family was wealthy, but his father abused his mother for years. “When I was three, my mother decided to immigrate to the

network and ran a business here, so there was more support.

Lagunas was fifteen when he first told a female friend he was bisexual, but he kept that secret carefully guarded. That did little to shield him: “My mom’s ex forced me to drop off school when I was 16. He told me that if I didn’t bring in money to pay my own bills, I could get the fu(& out of the house!” His mom suffered physical abuse, and was threatened with violence if she left the man. “He found me a job where he worked at that time.

He told everybody there that I liked to get fucked, making fun of the fact that I was raped, and then most of the Latinos would call me gay slurs all the

Photo: Courtesy of Flickr (longislandwins)

JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

Immigrants come to America for many reasons, and via many routes, as they have for centuries. When they arrive, especially if they have not come for a specific job or to join a particular community, they often find themselves isolated by linguistic and cultural barriers. LGBT immigrants are often further isolated within their U.S.-based families and immigrant communities, when those support groups not open to homosexuality. LGBT immigrants, then, are often faced with the prospect of living as an invisible minoritywithin-a-minority (or in the case of undocumented LGBT people, an invisible minority-within-an-invisibleminority).

As Renata Soto, co-founder and executive director of Conexión Américas, explained, “There are a lot of illusions. For many LGBT people, it’s what brings them here. They come here so they can be who they are.

Even if that’s not why they come, they assume coming will allow that. This is not to say that when they get here, this is what happens: They find that a lot of people are excluded in this country too.”

Out & About Nashville sought to provide a window into the LGBT immigrant experience, but this was even harder than anticipated. Many did not want to talk about their experiences publicly, even anonymously. Some didn’t think their experience relevant: many went through the legal process completely closeted, came from countries where LGBT people are broadly accepted, or have little to do with immigrant communities.

Immigrants from homophobic cultures feared further isolation and family shame. For undocumented immigrants, these fears are compounded by the danger of being identified (President Obama’s executive order notwithstanding).

Benji Camarena Garcia Photo: Chris Walburn

an exciting, and lonely experience,” he said. “I miss my family, but I talk with them regularly. I work very hard, typically six days a week, at least 10

OUTANDABOUTNASHVILLE.COM

JANUARY 2015

time, or tell me what they were going to do to me.”

For the years he worked there before he came out, Lagunas suffered this abuse. Coming out also made it clear that his wider community hadn’t left behind its repressive norms either and made him reticent of talking to anyone about his sexuality, especially Latinos. “When I did finally come out, I was rejected by so many. So

Jose (JF) Laguna’s

did so on the condition of anonymity, despite the fact that he emigrated here legally. Peter’s family left the Philippines for increased opportunities.

His parents were granted work visas. “My dad was an architect and engineer…. My mom got work as a school teacher.” The family came to Nashville after first moving to American Samoa.

Peter was seventeen when he arrived in Nashville, and here he came out. “My family,” Peter said, “was pretty good about it. I was expecting worse, but they were supportive.”

Nevertheless, the support only went so far, and didn’t extend to the broader Filipino immigrant community. “Being gay is taboo and no one ever addresses it openly.”

Being in America definitely made Peter’s experience easier. “Living here required a greater sense of openness. The Philippines is far more conservative and religious. Since I did not grow up in the Philippines, I

“I DON’T HIDE OR DENY THAT I AM GAY IN ANY OF THESE WORLDS, BUT I KNOW WHERE I AM MORE WELCOME.”

if I don’t have the need to, I would rather not tell people about it, just to prevent problems, but I’m proud of my sexuality.”

Later, his mother’s ex would try to kill both Lagunas and his mother, but they cooperated with police, and the man was sent to jail. “We were able to move on to a better life. Then I got another job, met some LGBT people, and I began to feel more comfortable.”

Further, because he and his mother cooperated in the prosecution of their abuser, they applied for and received U-visas, altering their status and opening up more opportunities for them.

Lagunas has felt far more welcomed by the LGBT community than the immigrant community, though he said he has met a lot of others who sympathize, especially straight Latin immigrants who were also sexual abuse victims. Most of his support, he added, has come from governmental agencies and LGBT friends.

Not all immigrants experience the kind of overt rejection or harassment that Lagunas experienced. The third person who agreed to speak, Peter,

felt more comfortable being out.” His family knew coming here that they’d have to be more open to difference.

Still, he said, “It’s hard to be out here in the local community. No one wants to talk about it but no one gives anyone a hard time about it either.” The stigma of homosexuality is silent, but deeply isolating.

Peter honestly couldn’t grasp what I was asking when I asked how his LGBT and immigrant identities influenced each other. “Those worlds exist far apart from each other. It’s kind of like a third identity apart from both my native and immigrant ones. Those lines don’t blur. It’s just easier that way.” Peter has never taken a partner to an event involving the Philippine immigrant community or his extended family, and he’s only taken one partner home for a visit with his immediate family. “I don’t hide or deny that I am gay in any of these worlds, but I know where I am more welcome.”

Peter’s sentiment recalls Lagunas, who said he was proud of his identity but doesn’t bring it up if he can help it. Navigating the immigrant world and experience as a minority within a

minority compounds an already hard existence, and adds difficulties all its own. As Peter said, “It took me a while to get to this place. It’s a hard truth in life that coming out doesn’t just happen once in life. It’s awkward enough in a normal setting but put it in the context of a different culture and set of values.

It becomes a more formidable beast.”

Now imagine Lagunas’ position when he was undocumented. While he said that most whites he had encountered were accepting of him as a gay Latino, he added, “Yeah, they were cool if they didn’t know [about my undocumented status].” Undocumented immigrants, like LGBT people, are constantly faced with the necessity of, or the opportunity to, come out. When you’re both, it must seem inescapable.

“I think Americans take a lot for granted,” Benji said. “However, you don’t know what you don’t know. They have not experienced the hardships and discrimination that we often experience in Mexico.” It’s equally true that we don’t know the hardships, both in terms of social isolation and exclusion and of internalized guilt, immigrants face when they come here.

And yet, while there are real difficulties, there are real rewards. “I came to the United States to find work and make money,” Benji said. “I never expected to find love like I did. That has been the greatest surprise of all.”

For those who are in the country illegally, either having entered without inspection or having gone out of status, there are a few options for remaining in the country legally: Path 1—Asylum. The process is complicated, requires experienced legal assistance, and rarely leads to a grant of asylum. Asylum must be requested within a year of entry.

Path 2—Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA). This program, initiated by Obama in 2012 and expanded in 2014, allows illegal immigrants who entered the country before their 16th birthday (before 2010) to apply for a renewable two-year work permit and exemption from deportation. No path to citizenship.

Path 3—Deferred Action for Parents of Americans and Lawful Permanent Residents (DAPA). Part of Obama’s November 2014 Executive Action, DAPA offers protections similar to DACA for parents of children legally in the U.S. Renewable every three years, no path to citizenship.

Path 4—U-visa. Congress created the U nonimmigrant visa for crime victims who assist law enforcement with the prosecution of the crime are eligible to apply. This confers a documented status and therefore may open other legal avenues.

GLOSSARY: “Entry Without Inspection”: The act of entering a country without examination by customs and immigration.

“Undocumented Immigrant”: A person who enters the country without the appropriate permissions (visa).

“Out of Status”: A person who entered the country with the appropriate permissions, but whose status has subsequently changed.

Generally the visa has expired and the person chooses to stay without appropriate permission.

SOURCE: Paula Auerbach, attorney

FACTS ABOUT THE EXECUTIVE ACTION ON IMMIGRATION: 1) The Chief Executive has the authority to prioritize enforcement (in this case, to focus on serious criminals).

2) Every president since Dwight Eisenhower has taken executive action on immigration.

3) States actions against executive immigration action have been dismissed by the courts.

4) States benefit economically when undocumented workers register and pay taxes.

5) By focusing on undocumented immigrant children and the undocumented parents of legal children, Obama’s orders have prevented the destruction of American families.

SOURCE: Silva Mathema & Philip E. Wolgin, Center for American Progress Photo: Chris Walburn

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Photos: Courtesy of TIRRC

BITTERSWEET VICTORY FOR IMMIGRANTS RIGHTS ACTIVISTS

JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

There is a lot of confusion about what President Obama’s 2014 Executive Action on Immigration entails, and the situation is muddied by the fact that officials from at least twenty-four states have filed legal challenges against the president’s order.

Stephanie Teatro, interim codirector of the Tennessee Immigrant & Refugee Rights Coalition (TIRRC), explained, “The president’s order involves changes in about ten different areas, over three categories. The first of those categories deals with border security, immigration enforcement, and prioritizing deportation. The fact is, the government has to prioritize. This isn’t amnesty, it’s just an acknowledgement that we should focus on threats to national security or safety.”

This is hardly a stunning change in policy, and even the minimal gain is insecure. “If you don’t fall into one of those categories, you shouldn’t be deported,” Teatro reflects. But she’s cautious. “We’ve heard this before.

While we’re encouraged, we’ve heard this message in the past and then seen

families separated. We’ll know it’s effective when we see it.”

Second, Obama’s order also includes provisions dealing with highly skilled workers. “There are provisions included,” Teatro explained, “that make it easier for high skilled workers to stay in the country and even to petition for family and children to come.”

Third is the largest and most controversial aspect, though it’s closely related to the first. “Deferred action,” Teatro explained, “shields some people [from] deportation and allows them to apply for work permit during the three years.” This isn’t amnesty by a long shot, as the name indicates. Deferred action leaves looming the possibility of future deportation. “Most every president has declared something like this—Obama did it in 2012 for some children. This action affects 4.4 million parents who are undocumented but have a child who is a citizen or green card holder.” While the 2012 program is already accepting renewal applications for deferred status, the full application process for the 2014 program is still not available. Nevertheless, given its

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mission, TIRRC is busy preparing for the day the process opens.

TIRRC is “a coalition of individuals and organizations that develops leadership in the community and focus on advocacy,” Teatro said.

“We have defeated over 125 antiimmigrant bills since our founding, and we’re working proactively to secure access for undocumented students to higher education in Tennessee.

Advocating for federal immigration reform is our highest priority, of course, since that’s where policy is set. We’ve helped put pressure on the president and congress to impress on them that they have a responsibility to act.”

Now, TIRRC will be “taking a lead role across the state to make this new executive action a reality for Tennessee residents.” To that end, in the one month since Obama announced his order, TIRRC had already held over twenty-five information sessions to inform people of what the changes mean, and they are actively working with local schools to begin preparing paperwork. When the applications are released, they’ll hold legal services

workshops to help people prepare their applications.

While Teatro and others at TIRRC are rightfully proud of their accomplishments, they also recognize how limited they are. The program is subject to renewal under the next administration. Further, though it potentially helps nearly five million people, “So many members carrying out the fight aren’t benefiting,” Teatro said. “Not everyone is a parent of a legal child. LGBT immigrants have been leaders in the immigrants’ rights movement, and many of our most active members are openly undocumented and openly gay. But so much of our immigration system is family based that LGBT individuals are given less remedy. We have to continue advocating for all the people who are left out.”

For more information about TIRRC, or their work, visit www. tnimmigrant.org. If you are interested in volunteering to help immigrants apply for Deferred Action, contact TIRCC directly.

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JANUARY 2015

CONEXIÓN AMÉRICAS BUILDS A COMMUNITY WITHOUT BORDERS the interest of “social, economic and civic integration of Latino families.” In December 2012, Conexión moved into its new center, Casa Azafrán, which now houses ten nonprofit resident partners, from Family and Children’s Services to the American Muslim Advisory Council and Justice for Our Neighbors.

“Bringing these ten nonprofit partners together under one roof, we created a central location where immigrants can access essential resources,” Soto explained. “Our partners share the goal of helping make these people integral parts of our community and getting them recognized as such. They provide clinical health services, immigration services, financial and mental health counseling, and community building and organizing.

Beyond direct services, we are advocates for the values that helped build this country, including helping change unfair laws.”

Conexión’s mission—and the common immigrant experiences that led to its creation—make it sympathetic to the plight of the LGBT community. According to Soto, “We have locally partnered with

our hiring practices and our choices in partners and clients. We want to foster an understanding that LGBT individuals are integral parts of our communities,” Soto said. “We have openly gay employees and board members, some Latino and some not, and that’s absolutely an expression of who we are.”

When I mentioned that some LGBT immigrants hesitate to seek help from immigrants’ groups, Soto understood their worry. “People feel the exclusion of being an immigrant,” Soto reflected. “If you are also LGBT, you might be feeling excluded from your own family and community.

We understand these people might carry a heavier weight.”

But Soto was clearly moved to hear that there are LGBT immigrants in Nashville who are deterred from seeking assistance from places like Conexión.

“I don’t take lightly,” she said with emotion, “the fact that there are those you have talked to who don’t know about our services or don’t feel that there is something here for them. We clearly have to do more to let them know that this is a place for them, for everyone.”

and supported the work and vision of the Human Rights Campaign and the Tennessee Equality Project, and we raise our voices whenever we see injustice.”

Though this may seem beyond the organizations mission, she added, “We experience exclusion based on our origins, and recognize that other exclusions are equally unjust. We are part of a larger movement against unfair exclusion: We seek to build a society where no one is excluded!” This is more than a theoretical commitment. “We active seek LGBT inclusion in our organization through

Conexión and its partners are well situated to be at the forefront of LGBT immigrants’ services. Soto recalled one example that illustrates this clearly. “The mom is part of our parent engagement program, which helps parents ensure their children are getting what they need at school. In that program, we highlighted our counseling programs.” Later, this particular mother approached Conexión, explaining vaguely that she was having difficulty with her son.

When she made an appointment with resident partner Family and Children’s

Renata Soto, Executive Director, Conexión Américas Photo: Julius Greene

Service, “She opened up to the parent engagement counselor, explaining that her young teen had come out,” Soto said.

“She needed a third party person to help her learn to be supportive and to have another adult who could be there for her son as well. This gave the mom a person with whom she could share her fears and

Photos: Courtesy of TIRRC and Conexión Américas

JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

According to the 2000 Census Report, there was a 446 percent growth of the Hispanic population in Nashville between 1990 and 2000. There were few resources, however, to assist these newcomers in integrating their lives with that of the Nashville community or in accessing the services available to them. María Clara Mejia, José González and Renata Soto formed Conexión Américas and teamed up with the Hispanic Family Resource Center to meet this need.

What began with an information and referral service has grown to encompass the Spanish Help Line for Middle Tennessee, and Conexión programs now serve over 2,500 families each year. Soto, current executive director and co-founder of Conexión, explained, “Our programs now cover so many dimensions—from helping Latino families buy homes and start business to helping them learn English—that it’s really amazing.”

Two years ago, Conexión achieved one of its long-term goals with the creation of a true community center, a central hub for education and organization in

questions, and gave the son an outlet as well.”

For Soto, this exemplifies the services of, and need for, organizations like those brought together at Casa Azafrán. “In the end, she wanted to be supportive and lower her social biases—she just needed support. We were grateful for the opportunity to be there in that time of need, to help her prepare and to support her son.”

For more information, or to get involved, visit conexionamericas.org and casaazafran.org. @O U T A N D A B O U T N A S H

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TOP CHEF DALE LEVITSKI’S ‘NASHVEGAS’ STYLE A GAY CHEF TALK’S LIFE IN THE PROFESSIONAL KITCHEN

JAMES GRADY | @jamesallengrady

Back in April 2014, it was announced that a new restaurant would be opening in the Melrose Theater.

Sinema was designed around the major original features of the Melrose, which opened in 1942: elements of the lobby, mirrored walls and ceilings, and the impressive curved grand staircase.

“It was crucial that we listened to the message that the building was giving us,” said Colin Reed, a partner/owner in Sinema. “The spirit of this historic gem in Nashville demanded that we do this the right way.”

Based on the old Hollywood feel of the design and décor of the location, Dale Levitski, the restaurant’s executive chef, said of the concept, “We were going with a sort of ‘Nashvegas’ theme. Nashville is full of places that were going with lots of reclaimed wood, designs that use farm-to-table as more than a cooking philosophy, but as a style. We went over the top with a jazz, Patti Lapone feel. Old school American luxury informed our décor and our food, which is a luxurious, exciting take on American cuisine.”

Six months later, Sinema is playing to packed houses on weekends and serving a growing weekday clientele. Part of the draw is the ambience, of course, but a great deal of the buzz surrounding Sinema is generated by its celebrity executive chef. Levitski—runner-up on the third season of Bravo’s Top Chef—is also one of the most well-known gay chefs working in America today.

Levitski never attended culinary school: he learned by fire. “Cooking

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kind of found me [when] I was in college,” Levitski explained. “I moved out of the dorms and applied as a fry cook in Iowa City. The place was kind

that I fell in love with the rush of the kitchen.”

Levitski did want to go to culinary school, though his plan backfired. “I

of like a downgraded Applebee’s. The manager asked why I wasn’t applying to be a server. As a college athlete, I guess I was cute.” But Levitski explained, “Really, I was so painfully shy that I didn’t want to talk to people.

Now I’m obnoxious but back then I was a wall flower. But it was there

was going to leave Iowa and move to Chicago for a year. I’d cook in the big city for a year, save up some money, and then go to a culinary program in San Fran. But that plan was an epic fail! What I didn’t understand then was that the bigger city you go to, the less you make in terms of take-home

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JANUARY 2015

pay. So, I ended up jumping into the industry and never looked back.”

In 1998, Levitski worked for Carol Wallack at Deleece, learning the basics, and then for James Beard Award winning chef Paul Kahan at Blackbird, which he often cites as “his culinary school.” From there he served as head chef at La Tache and the famous Trio Atelier. Then there was Top Chef. “My boyfriend at the time and I were watching the show and by the second episode, I was yelling at the screen. He told me I should go on the show, but my friends were split over whether it would be great or ruin my career. It was all so new.”

When he and his boyfriend broke up—and when his restaurant, Orange, closed—Levitski decided to go for it. “The whole process was very bazaar—unemployed and broke, I flew out and basically forced my way on the show! I had been coached on how to apply: ‘Turn the volume on your personality way up!’ So, I went out there and basically just declared, “I’m a gay cook from the Midwest, and you’re Bravo. It’s a no-brainer!’

I would tease Andy on set every day, and he would look at me like ‘Who is this person?’”

Levitski’s sexuality was part of his entertainment value on the show and behind the scenes.

Professional kitchens are notoriously hyper-masculine and full of strong personalities. “Ever since I started working in the kitchen, I knew I had to be out front. “Kitchens are full of harsh language, the worse the insult you can get the better! I’ve never shied away from using being gay to

disarm. When Andy would walk by on the set, I would say, ‘Fag!’ It would totally throw him off balance.”

One shouldn’t think Levitski takes sexuality lightly, but being forward and open about it has been “a disarming way to get respect. It was during Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.

They didn’t ask, but I told. In college sports I was living in a necessarily closeted sort of environment. In the kitchen, I used it as an opportunity to get as out-there as possible.” This has changed attitudes. “If someone was conservative and looked offended when we were bantering, I could always point out that he had said something similar about women. The person would either have an ‘Oh’ moment or they’d loosen up.”

Levitski has done his best to make sure that being gay hasn’t held him back in the cut-throat world of elite kitchens, “I’m not in the boys club. I’m not invited to do certain events. I’m not cliquish with chefs, but I’m also not the most social person anyway, so that’s not a huge loss. Some cooks won’t work for me.” While his status has shielded him from overt homophobia, even in Nashville, he said, “Some of my cooks are given a hard time, even though

they’re straight. When they hang out with other cooks after work, they sometimes get the ‘You work for him?’ attack. They’ve been very valiant in defending themselves and me.”

Nashville as a whole, however, doesn’t seem to mind. “People seem to like what we’re doing,” he said.

“We’re bringing a different style of food and expanding the food scene.”

While he is regaling customers with his Frog and Snail signature dish, beef stroganoff, Levitski is also committed to “discovering local products and produce, which you’ll see reflected in experiments we’ll use to help better understand the local palate.” This, he thinks, promises to be an exciting journey.

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SHE’S HOT CASEY PROMISE

JANE DUPREE | @janedupree

A long time ago in a land far, far away called college, I met my friend, Dylan. Dylan was a handsome, calm, and sweet guy from Murfreesboro, Tennessee. From time to time, we would hang out at parties and go dancing. We shared a love for dance, music, life, and almost everything.

We even had mutual friends, one of whom was his big sister, Casey. Casey Thompson to be exact.

Casey Thompson, known as Casey Promise, is one of Nashville’s fastest rising stars in the visual arts, and in my opinion, she is on her way to becoming a well-known name in the national art circuit. This summer, she was featured in several local

hypnotizing and speaks to the heart without words. Her visual captivations are stunning and refreshing, which is why I think She’s Hot. Casey grew up in Murfreesboro, in a household including two younger brothers and two hippie parents. Casey was exposed to a world of creative influences as a kid. Her parents were best friends with professors, musicians, and artists. She even spent time at Short Mountain, a gay hippie community outside of Woodbury, Tennessee. So, it was natural for her to desire an artistic outlet at an early age.

Casey studied art for one year at Watkins College of Art, Design & Film, and shortly afterwards she moved to Santa Fe, New Mexico, for a few years of a “strange soul-searching experience.” The high deserts of Santa Fe taught Casey many life lessons and led to a blossoming of spiritual growth for her. After the powerful experience and the lessons learned, it was time for her to come home.

Casey Promise Recently I had the chance to ask my old crony a few questions, and this is what she had to say: Dupree: What is your motivation for creativity?

Casey: Music, being in love, nature, death, fear, and the need to release.

Dupree: What is your favorite medium?

Casey: I would have to say, I love using graphite the most. There is something about using pencils that brings out both the lightest and darkest creatures of my imagination…though I also have this tiny dream of creating surreal claymation/stop-motion films!

Dupree: How has Nashville influenced your creative process?

Casey: Nashville is mainly religious.

If anything, it pushes me to go beyond the limits of conformity.

AUTHOR BIO

publications (including the Nashville Arts Magazine), her solo exhibit at Red Arrow Art Gallery received rave reviews, and she is currently working on new material daily. Casey’s art is

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Casey currently resides in East Nashville, where she likes to play her music loud while driving with no destination, drink whiskey, think like a Virgo, and be visually creative.

Dupree: As an artist, how does it feel to part ways with a finished piece?

Casey: It depends on the piece and what I had to take from my life and heart in order to create it. There are a few pieces that I still have yet to part with. One, in particular, tells a story of a woman I once loved very much, and the pain in her heart that she continues to carry.

Jane Dupree Before is from Alamo, TN, a small, rural town located in West Tennessee. She grew up playing music in her hometown church. After high school, she attended Middle Tennessee State University to study in the Recording Industry Management program. While in college, she hosted a weekly radio show on WMTS, Housenation, for five years. After college, she dove head-first into the world, playing various venues and events across the country, as well as DJing for some of the biggest names in dance music, as well as for the Nashville Rollergirls, and appearing in a few television shows. If you would like to nominate a lady to be featured in She’s Hot, drop Jane a line at djjanedupree@gmail.com.

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JANUARY 2015

Dupree: What is your favorite period in art?

Casey: The Mannerism Art period.

I’m not religious, but I’m intrigued by the mythology behind good and evil.

There’s a lot of darkness, sexuality, emotionless expressions, and chaos in that period.

when I’m in love. When heartbroken, I create my darkest of creatures. Let’s just say that I’m drawing a lot more devils than angels right now.

Dupree: What is your biggest dream as an artist?

Casey: To help people feel and see more within themselves and within one other.

Dupree: How would you describe the Nashville art scene?

Casey: Disappointing, as well as thriving. They have to cover the windows at The Arcade if there’s any nudity in the art. It’s ridiculous! It’s 2014, and it’s time to move forward.

Dupree: How does love or heartbreak affect your work?

Casey: I create the most amount of work when I’m single and my heart has been healed. I create my best work

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Casey: Sometimes I think the mold is being broken, and then sometimes I worry that we are only taking steps back. I think about leaving Nashville because it’s so conservative, but if people like me leave, the city will never change.

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SNARKOLOGY:

NEW YEAR, NEW YOU? NOT SO MUCH...

AMY SULAM | @Amysulam

Every year people make new year’s resolutions they inevitably don’t keep.

When I lived in Baltimore, the thrift stores there would often have signs that read, “We are no longer accepting donations of home gym equipment.”

Wow! If that is not a statement on the lack of follow-through on good intentions, I don’t know what would be.

If you really wanted to improve your life, you’d probably start by leaving Baltimore.

I don’t understand this “new you” idea. Are you an insufferable ass-hat?

Okay, then. A new you is probably a good idea. On the off-chance you’re a regular person with some shortcomings, how about you just modify your behavior for a reward while still being “you”?

Here’s what I have learned in addiction recovery: no one goes to rehab because other people make him or her go. A person goes because they have hit rock bottom (maybe a few times). I had deluded myself into thinking everything was fine, which is easy to do when you’re high all the time. It wasn’t until I was forced to look at what other people saw that it sank in. I had this sort of “Picture of Dorian Gray” moment, but in reverse.

I got to thinking that maybe, instead of setting unrealistic goals with no sustainable motivation, hitting rock bottom might be a better goal. After all, nothing helps you stick to your new year’s resolutions quite as well as that.

If my goal is to get into shape, maybe I should post a picture on Instagram proclaiming how cute I think I am, and, as petty people do, they’ll rip me apart. Never mind that the people commenting on my looks are average at best. Let’s face it, nothing says “I’m Confident!” better than running someone else down.

Then, I should take those comments and post them on my gym equipment. When I don’t want to work out, I should read through them. Or maybe I should look up pictures of the people who made fun of me and tape their ugly faces up in a visible spot for my workout.

If I’ve resolved to quit drinking, I know what could help! I’m just going to need just the right event! Maybe meeting my (imaginary) significant other’s family, the birth of a child, my nephew’s Bar Mitzvah, grandma’s funeral, etc…

Next, I should begin to binge drink.

I mean really commit. We’re talking Tequila at 9 a.m. level binge drinking.

Maybe, for good measure, I’ll make sure to mix ipecac into a few of the bottles. Believe me, nothing would get me never to drink another drop quite like vomiting into granny’s casket, or yelling to my nephew in the middle of synagogue services, “You know, your mom’s a whore, Shmuli!” Dropping newborns and feeling up future in-laws are also effective, so I’m gonna feel free to get creative.

Here’s the thing: no amount of

bribing will get anyone to do anything if the self isn’t truly motivated to do it. New year’s resolutions focus on shallow things that we might be able change, but they wouldn’t change anything meaningful in our lives.

How about this, instead of buying a gym membership you’ll never use, make two lists: “Reasons I am an asshole” and “Reasons I am not a complete d@%#.”

Take a personal inventory and work on increasing the list of things that could make you a better human being.

Instead of worrying what others think about your physical appearance, look in the mirror and say, “Nope! Not perfect! But I love that mother fucker!

I’m a dope-ass person to be!” Then try free style rapping. You’ll take yourself less seriously and that’s a good thing.

New you? Nah. Do you, unapologetically, and with a smile.

I just saved you money and guilt.

You’re welcome!

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A KIKI WITH

PAIGE TURNER | @PaigeTurner01

Holy Untucked! This girl is on fire! That’s right, it’s everyone’s favorite jewel of the south, Miss Sapphire Mylan. She has been busy with her day job as stylist to the stars, her thriving drag career, and her upcoming television appearances! But she still managed some time for our Untucked readers. And, oh hunty, was the “T” spilt!

We talked all about her thriving career, business ventures, the golden years of drag, and much more in this latest kiki.

Sapphire was open to talk about anything, and boy is this lady straightforward and opinionated! So, sit back and relax: It’s time to get Untucked!

When did you start doing drag?

I started doing drag in 1999 at the Connections on Halloween. I went dressed as a pageant queen and Regine Phillips dressed me up. They actually would not let me enter the contest because they thought I had won a pageant and had shown up that night representing the title!

Who would you say has been the biggest inspiration to your drag career?

That’s a tough one. So many different people. Rita Ross for her passion, Regine Phillips for her entertainment value, Stephine Wells for her elegance, and Bianca Paige for her comedic timing. I always loved her and always will. And, of course, Josephine and Chyna…all of them for different reasons.

I didn’t really take it seriously until about 2004 when I was show director at Blu. That was my favorite place to perform because I had so much freedom to do what I wanted. Then I also started doing pageants, and Chyna, of course, read me down and told me I needed to learn to paint my own face and not rely on these other girls to do it if I was going to be serious!

What are some big differences between Nashville’s drag community when you started and now?

Before, it was more of a sisterhood. So, if your drag sister was hurting, everybody was going to help. Whether it was money, comfort, or benefits shows. Everyone was there for each other. Now it’s like every man for himself. More like, “Good luck on your journey,” not “How can I help you get there.” The bar here doesn’t really book the girls from here. There are

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JANUARY 2015

Photo: Mylan Couture Design

Did you always take your drag seriously and see it as a potential career?

queens here that have respect and have built a following. But they pull these girls from out of town and they can’t perform their way out of a paper bag!

They don’t really hire the people in our city and that’s bullshit to me. These girls now don’t care anymore. You couldn’t go out there looking like some of them do now back when I started. They wouldn’t let you perform!

What were some examples of how the community came together then?

My favorite was at Cabaret. We did a show for a girl who was positive and had lost her hands and legs. So, we did a Christmas benefit for her to get prosthetics. She was a huge Fantasia fan. So, I came out and did her favorite Fantasia song, and I remember her trying to clap for me.

It was so touching. She came back a few months later, and they asked me to do it again. I didn’t know at the time that she was there. But I did it, and she was able to walk up—since she had the prosthetic—and hug me.

It was a real tear-jerker.

What would say is a problem with some of today’s drag?

These girls are all just so scared to come out of the box and be original.

Some are too worried about being pretty to take risks with their performances. One of my favorite things I ever did was for Halloween at Blu, when I dressed as Marlyn Manson, and the crowd loved it. I had a mix made—“Sweet Dreams” into “Beautiful People”—and the white bodysuit.

Have you experienced shade or drag bullying from any of the drag community here or out of town?

I think sometimes I don’t get certain bookings at shows because some of these girls that work at the bars. They have said I am shady before and have told people at the bar, and I think that hinders their decisions when booking me. I have even helped some of these girls start in the industry … But in return, they only want to slander and throw shade.

of Bravo’s Thicker than Water airing January 4, 2015, where I did a fashion show for my fashion venture, Mylan Couture Design. I am also the stylist for Brooklyn Tankard.

What would you say has been your biggest achievement in your drag career?

I honestly don’t think I have made my biggest achievement yet, I’m still working towards that.

Sapphire hosts a monthly show, Mylan Rouge, in Bowling Green Kentucky, and appears every fourth Monday at Tribe for Monday mashup with Nicole Ellington Dupree. Follow her on social media on Instigram (sapphire_mylan) and facebook.com/sapphire.mylan.

For more of Sapphire’s opinions on RuPaul’s Drag Race, pageants, family, etc. see the extended online edition!

I’m sure you have seen a lot since ‘98. What advice would you pass on to new queens?

medical care for your entire family

I try to be a friend first and drag mother second, because, as your friend, I’m gonna tell you the truth.

If you’re going to do drag, do it right…. As for advice, I’d tell them, “Be nice, and be real: it’s an art.

Don’t be trashy. Do you want to do this for Halloween? Or make a career out of it?”

So, what’s the next big step in your career?

I will actually appear on an episode

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GARY BRADSHAW | @RiseGrindr

One recent weekend, I celebrated my 29th birthday. And like most birthdays before, I spent it with my friends, catering to their needs, dancing in a smoky bar, and double fisting my gifted cocktails as quickly as they were being poured.

The next morning, I woke up hung over…a year older…and alone. That was something I had vowed I would change when I moved from my cozy Midwestern upbringings to the Bible-thumping South nearly four years ago.

The story of my childhood is all too familiar in the gay community: I knew I was different, I never played sports, my relationships with straight men were always complex and short lived, etc. I won’t bore you with those details, or with in-depth retellings of my previous sexual conquests, which, until now, have only been women. For 28 years I fought every instinct and scarred my inner being emotionally in an effort to become something I never will be: a straight man.

Laying in bed that morning after my birthday bender, dehydrated and sleep deprived, I finally woke up. Figuratively.

Not even a tractor-trailer could have

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moved me from the comforts of my bed that morning. Tired of playing the workaholic who doesn’t have time for dating, I decided to stop being afraid and start exploring. I grabbed my phone and downloaded an app a friend shared with me a few years before: Grindr.

Not sure how it would end and maybe still drunk from the previous night’s debauchery, I signed up. The process was easy. Maybe too easy. Like, “You don’t need any personal information to verify who I am?” easy. Ignoring the red flags, I uploaded my most current photo and was on my way.

I quickly browsed the sea of headless torso photos of men in my area, relieved I didn’t come across any of my colleagues (or their faces anyway). “Ding!” my phone announced the first message was received. Then another.

And another. I quickly realized I was in over my head.

“C@%# pic?” read the first message, which was from a man who can only be described as a Duck Dynasty cast reject. The next guy led with a picture of his flaccid penis, which looked like it had recently been dipped in a fresh can of herpes, asking if I was “Looking?” And the third guy (whose profile had no photo) simply wrote “sup”.

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JANUARY 2015

Maybe I had rushed into this. I closed the app without reading any other messages, assuming they’d all be the same.

After a nap and some more selfloathing over a greasy cheeseburger, I decided to see what I missed. Twenty-eight

messages awaited my response (yikes!).

But being of clearer mind—or maybe the cheeseburger had clogged whatever part of my brain told me the difference between right and chlamydia—I decided to go through them. Most were much like the first three: d@%# pics, guys older than my own father, and short forms of “hello.” And then there was “Joe.” “Joe” had a nice profile photo (of his face), excellent stats and a message that didn’t make me want to spend eternity alone. He indicated that he’d like to chat and asked me how I enjoyed my weekend.

I replied that I’d spent the day in recovery after a healthy night of vodka-sodas and tequila shots and quickly moved to the next message. “Ding,” my phone rang instantly, indicating “Joe” hadn’t run off from my early indication of alcoholism.

“Same,” he said as a conversation kicked off and proceeded for about two hours of getting-to-know-yous. Just as I was about to turn in for the night, “Joe” asked if he could call me to hear my voice. We talked for another two hours about everything ranging from Golden Girls marathons to family dealings, all the while seeming oddly comfortable.

As my brain—and body—was screaming for sleep, I politely told him 4.65 x 5.25 I’d have to say goodnight.

He trim asked

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if we could continue it in the morning and perhaps meet for a drink in the next couple of days. Again, I agreed, and we said goodnight.

I woke up the following morning, ready to tackle work and perhaps some more messages on Grindr. Though not “out” to most friends and family, I feel unafraid of stepping into the unknown.

As I sit at work, texting back and forth with “Joe” and making plans to meet, I find myself compelled to document this journey of sexual exploration with you, whoever “you” end up being. But how does one begin to tell one’s story of sexual exploration? Something so personal and, at times, maybe humiliating? Now, I am

going to share this journey with strangers?

Yep. Who knows where this will go?

Perhaps the story ends after a romantic meeting with “Joe,” as we begin our life together, or maybe this is just the beginning as I uncover, one-by-one, the faces belonging to the sea of headless torsos. Either way, I’m inviting you along with me (and even to provide commentary or unsolicited advice in the process). Because now that I’ve woken up, it’s time to “Rise & Grind…r”.

Follow Gary’s exploits on social media, and check out his website at RiseAndGrindr.com.

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33

FEMALE PRIVILEGE:

The Top Ten Reasons...

I Want to be a Woman

BOBBI WILLIAMS

Occasionally I’ll see a comment by someone in the general population claiming that there’s a devious ulterior motive lurking behind the need to be the accepted as female. To those people I want to say “Bravo...you found me out!” And here are the primary reasons why I want to do it: Photo: Julius Greene

always a hysterectomy or, at least, a radical mastectomy. Doctors (mostly men) love doing those procedures, and I’d be totally honored to be among the women chosen to have one.

10. I Want to Polish That Glass Ceiling:

Women account for less than five percent of the top executive positions. And you know management jobs give you ulcers. Besides, women live longer than men and we wouldn’t want ulcers interfering with that.

9. Don’t Want No Respect: If I were a

woman, I wouldn’t have to worry about wasting people’s time with my stupid remarks; they wouldn’t pay any attention to me, anyway.

3. Sexual Harassment:

8. Miss Representation: Just 13% of the

Senate and 13.8% of the House are women.

It’s obvious that men do a better job of running the country. Isn’t it? So, why get into politics at all?

7. That Cougar Thing: I hate being seen as a dirty old man. I’d rather be stared at because the man I’m with is twenty years older than I am…and has money. I repeat…and… has…money.

6. Pregnancy: I long for the day I can feel

a fetus shoving my liver into my spleen and squeezing my bladder while I throw up every morning, and then having my vagina ripped apart by the head of a child who can’t wait to grow up and tell me I’m a cold-hearted bitch who never loved him.

Such a blessing.

34

5.Objectification:

Men appreciate women. And cars and tools. They know the value of things. So, why wouldn’t a man want to be a woman?

It’s a lot easier to get a makeover and be the arm candy than it is to pay for dinner.

4.Clitorectomy:

Circumcision is for wussies. This is a “civilized” country, and though a woman can’t get a clitorectomy, there’s

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JANUARY 2015

Most guys dream of being harassed by a woman, but for women it’s an everyday occurrence having your ass pinched or your breast fondled. I know all about it and I don’t even have to advertise.

2. The Pay: If I can

make about 75% of what I’m making now I’ll be so much better off. Discretionary income is such a bother.

When I’m a woman I can slip into a lower tax bracket and find a man to buy me drinks and take me to dinner and not even

have to report it on my income tax.

1. The Abuse: When I was a kid, my father slapped me around, sometimes for no reason at all. Now, like so many women, I miss that. Over one million women are forcibly raped by strangers or by their date one or more times each year, and two to four million are assaulted by a domestic partner every year. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is.

There are many more reasons I could mention—stuff like getting to wear shoes that make your arches fall by the time you’re thirty and still being expected to do the housework and cook dinner even if you do get a job, but my space here is limited.

Even if you’re “just a transwoman,” you still get most of those perks and privileges.

So, I just don’t see why any man wouldn’t desire to be anything but a woman. There’s nothing devious about it; it’s all just another item on the gay agenda.

Dr. Bobbi Williams is an author, teacher, lecturer, and consultant.

Comments may be sent to her at bobbi@bobbiw.net

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