Bringing Home More Than Laundry

Adjusting to Home Life Over the Holidays

By Mindy Windholz (she/hers), Director of University Counseling

Congratulations! You’ve made it through the semester, and one that looks a little more typical this year. Juggling classes, studying, practice time, rehearsals, athletics, and socialization is no smallaccomplishment, especially when done well and in the time of a pandemic. You’ve had almost a full academic year to perfect your schedules, which may also include staying up a slightly (or more than a little) late at night.

You’ve also had some time to adjust your routine as you have been away from home and as fall makes way for winter, that means a return to home with your parents, caregivers, and others in your life that you have not seen in some time. Your life and routine may look more different than ever before, especially if this is your first semester away from home, and it may feel a little strange returning home to rules and routine that you have not lived with in recent months.

Here are some tips and suggestions to help you prepare for you return and how to help make it a smooth transition:

1. SETTING EXPECTATIONS

Have the conversation with those in your home about what has changed in house rules and regulations since you have been gone. That includes if there is a curfew or rules about how many friends can be in the home at one time. You may also have spent more time and money going out to eat or changing your eating habits since you have been home, so conversations about what is different may be helpful, too. Your caregivers may also want to spend more time with you, while you may want to see your friends. You can consider sharing time with everyone and talking about what you all can do together that will make memories.

2. LATE NIGHTS, LATE MORNINGS

Your sleep schedule may have changed since you have been on campus and may be totally unrecognizable. Let your caregivers know what has changed and talk with them about what is different and what you may need in terms of sleep. If you need readjusting to your schedule let them know that, too.

3. ACKNOWLEDGING ADULTHOOD

Something that may be difficult for caregivers if seeing how much you’ve changed as an emerging adult. Independence, decision-making, choices you've made, and responsibilities you've had this semester may not translate when you return home. Being able to thank your caregivers for the support and encouragement they have given you over the years can help you to talk about how you appreciate the support they have given you in order to help you grow.

4. ENGAGE IN DIALOGUE

You may have changed quite a bit since leaving home. You may be on a journey of discovering identity, exploring diverse viewpoints, and redefining your relationship with concepts you have never challenged before. Sometimes, this can cause some discourse with caregivers and it may not be safe to engage in conversation about new experiences. But if caregivers are open to new expressions and are open to being educated, do invite dialogue and conversation.

5. DON'T FORGET TO PACK YOUR PATIENCE

Be patient with yourself and your caregivers, especially if you have been more independent in your schedule since you have been in school. Adjustments can be tricky, so being gracious with yourself and open to change can help to welcome in changes.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY...

Find the enjoyment in the company of your caregivers. As emerging adults, time spent together over break can begin to set the tone for your evolving relationship and create stronger ties for the years ahead.