How To Help A Child Cope After A Traumatic Event

by Rebecca Leigh

Going through a traumatic event is difficult for anyone, but it's particularly difficult for children. Going through any traumatic event can shake their sense of stability and make them feel as though their lives aren't as secure as they believed them to be.

As they go through this event and the aftermath, you can work with the child to help them through it and make it easier for them. Here are some tips child psychologists and experts recommended to help you do this.

TAKE YOUR CHILD'S AGE INTO ACCOUNT

Your child's understanding of the world will change and grow as they age. Where your child is in their development will dictate, to some extent, just how you care for them through a traumatic event. An infant, for example, will react to your emotions, so it's important to stay as calm as possible and stick to your normal routine as much as you can.

Children aged 2 to 5 will need extra support and comfort and again will respond better when they still have a regular routine. Ages 6 to 11, a child will be more able to talk about their feelings, so it's important that you listen to them. Ages 11 and up may feel that they are out of control and need reassurance that there are still things they can control.

Recognize The Signs Of Trauma

After a traumatic event, at first glance, it may seem as though your child is unaffected. However, even if they're not outwardly saying they're affected, there will be signs that say otherwise. These can include:

• Chan ges in sleeping and eating patterns

• Becoming more clingy to a caregiver

• Regressing to earlier childhood behaviors, such as thumb sucking

• Struggles with school and homework

• Complaints of physical problems, such as stomach aches

These are just a few different symptoms, and the signs of trauma differ depending on the child's age. So be aware of how trauma can manifest in children of your child's age, and be looking out for them.

MINIMIZE YOUR CHILD'S MEDIA EXPOSURE

If your child has been through an event such as a shooting or a natural disaster, then it's very likely that it will get covered in the media. In the age of 24/7 news, though, that coverage can be relentless. If your child is exposed to it a lot, it can halt their healing progress as they're forced to relive the event.

Make use of parental controls to limit your child's exposure to the media and reports of the event. For example, ensure they aren't checking social media before bed. When they do engage with media, ensure you're there with them to put any information they get into context.

Make Your Child Feel Safe

When a child has been through a traumatic event, it will shake their sense of safety in the world. Because of this, they'll find it more difficult to trust others and the world around them. You can help by making things safer and more secure for them.

There are many ways you can do this. For example, you should ensure that your child sticks to routine as much as possible and that they still get to partake in activities that they can enjoy. If you make any promises to them, make sure that you keep them. If they ask you a question and you don't know the answer, be honest about it rather than making something up.

Be Available To Talk

At some point, your child will want to talk about what they've been through, and you'll need to be there to listen to them. You can't force them to talk, but you can provide the opportunity to talk should they want to. Allow your child to ask questions about the event they've been through, and reassure them that whatever happened was not their fault.

Also, show them that their feelings are valid. They can feel upset, scared, or angry, which are all appropriate reactions to trauma. Let them know that it's ok to feel that way and that you still love them. The most important thing you can do is not pressure your child into talking. If you keep providing opportunities and show your child you're there for them, they'll open up when they're ready.

These are just a few ways that you can help your child when they've been through a traumatic event. Follow these tips to help them heal and thrive after the event.