September 2016 issue

WELCOME

Back to School!

Politics and Kids Birth Order Confidence Has a New Look O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

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september 6 A Dad’s Eye View 12 Calendar of Events 16 Family Movie Time 19 Earthtalk 20 Read & Play

8

26 Rescue Spotlight

Feature Article How Birth Order Affects Parenting

Style Savvy: Dressing for Confidence

22

24

Politics and Kids

O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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A Dad’s Eye View

by Rick Epstein

STEALING HER SISTER’S

T

CAR

wo of my daughters a re aw ay a t college, but their car is still here. The dark green ‘02 Dodge Intrepid is parked out front, gathering dust, dripping fluids and waiting for someone to come home.

My oldest daughter, Marie, bought the car for $1,600 during her senior year of high school with money she made waiting tables at the Greasy Fork Cafe. When Marie went to college in a big city, her car stayed here for her use when she came home on break. She has no money anymore, so I’ve been paying for its upkeep. Then her younger sister, Sally, got her learner’s permit last winter and began slowly stealing it.

I came home from work one day and found the Intrepid’s trunk open and Sally pulling out bedraggled garments, obsolete CDs, squashed notebooks and other odd bits of junk and tossing them into a big box.

“What are you doing?’ I asked.

“Cleaning out my car,” she said. (I would like to put “my” in italics so you’ll notice it, but Sally made a point of not emphasizing the word.

She did not speak carelessly; for Sally, language is a tool for sculpting reality into shapes that please her. For example, when she was in kindergarten, she changed her name to Eve. Meeting no resistance, she then added two years to her age. She still operates that way.)

“YOUR car?” I asked.

“Yes; I’m re-naming her Esmerelda,” she said. (More sculpting.)

“That’s Marie’s car – except for the brakes and the tires, which are mine.”

She just smirked and continued dumping Marie’s belongings into the box. She put the box in the garage and vacuumed the empty trunk.

I wouldn’t say that Marie is a slob, but she does like her living spaces

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

covered with a comfortable layer of personal debris. The interior of her car had already been emptied and vacuumed. Marie’s lavender head-bobbing cat had been removed from the dashboard. Except for the paintings on the ceiling, it could’ve been anybody’s car.

The next time Marie came home for a visit, she told me, “I’m kind of mad at the way Sally borrows my stuff and then it becomes hers.

She’s been doing it for years with my clothes and jewelry, and now she’s doing it with my car. I don’t really NEED the car, but that doesn’t mean it’s hers. Remember when she took my iPod to summer camp without asking and then lost it? Now she wants to take my car away to camp.”

“She will if you don’t stop her,” I said, brushing aside any notion that I should get involved. I save all my waning strength for dealing with our eighth-grader and let the two big girls run themselves. After all, I won’t always be around. They need to develop the interpersonal skills that they’ll need for squabbling over my estate. So I just listen and advise. If Sally wants to drive off in her sister’s car, I won’t stand in her way.

“I don’t especially want to stop her,” Marie said. “I just want her to know that the Intrepid is mine. I love that car. And its name is The Phantom Cruiser; NOT Esmerelda!”

After Marie went back to the city, Sally complained to me that Marie was going to charge her rent for the car. “She wanted $50 for the summer,” said Sally, “But I got her down to $42. It doesn’t matter though; I’m not paying her.”

If Sally paid, she would be acknowledging that Marie has basic property rights. That would reach far beyond Esmerelda/Phantom Cruiser and cost her more than $42. It could snatch the clothes right out of her closet, the earrings out of her ears, and eventually the car out from under her thieving butt.

But the state motor-vehicles department dealt Sally a setback.

Although she is what my dad used to call “a real operator,” that doesn’t mean she is qualified to operate a motor vehicle. When Sally took her driving test in June, her weak parallel-parking skills proved to be a deal-breaker. Then, before she could practice and take the test again, her tight schedule whisked her away to camp for the whole summer.

Sally, still with no license, is now at college hundreds of miles from home, plotting her next move. The Intrepid lies becalmed in front of our house, awaiting a breeze. And that weather system is named Sally.

Although I get a kick out of watching Sally get what she wants, I’m going to advise Marie to do what Napoleon did with Louisiana: Sell it while she still can. Because if Marie waits too long, she’ll be left with only a dusty box of junk as a reminder of her beloved car, her sister’s ruthlessness, and the fleeting nature of the things we cherish.

Rick can be reached at rickepstein@yahoo.com.

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O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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The Life of the Party

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

The Peace Maker

The Achiever

How

Birth Order

Affects

Parenting

by Laura Reagan-Porras

O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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A

great deal has been written about birth order theory over the years. With all this data, the question is, how does the information affect our parenting?

The Achiever, The Peacemaker, and The Life of The Party Parenting expert Dr. Gail Gross summarizes the existing roles and research on birth order by naming the first born as the achiever, the middle child as the peacemaker and the youngest child as the life of the party. While the eldest child is programmed for excellence and achievement, the middle child is raised to be understanding and conciliatory and the baby seeks attention. Only children relate to the personality traits of the achiever and the life of the party.

Personality traits may be clustered in the following ways as a result of birth order.

Firstborns: Achievers • Reliable • Conscientious • Structured • Cautious • Controlling

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

Middle Children: Peacemakers • People-pleasers • Somewhat rebellious • Thrives on friendships • Has large social circle The Last Child: The Life of the Party • Fun-loving • Uncomplicated • Manipulative • Outgoing • Attention-seeker Some researchers state that birth order can be as powerful a variable in personality development as gender. It returns us to the old nurture vs. nature argument. Ultimately, we are different parents to different children in part due to their birth order.

Birth Order + Parenting = Behavior Meri Wallace, author of Birth Order Blues (Owl Books) states, “Birth order has to do with the way the parent relates to the child in his spot, and some of it actually happens because of the spot itself. Each spot has unique challenges,” she explains.

By being the firstborn with inexperienced, new parents, the parenting approach might be a mixture of instinct and trial-and-error.

Perhaps this will cause the parents to consult parenting books, be extremely attentive and rigid about how they enforcement “the rules.” This approach might cause the child to perfectionistic and become a people pleaser.

In contrast, if the couple decides to have a second child, they might raise their secondborn with less rigidity due their experiences raising their firstborn. They might also be less attentive to the second-born since there’s another child competing for attention. This might cause the second-born to be less perfectionistic, more relaxed but more likely to compete negatively for attention. It is not so much that the child came out of his mother’s womb first that caused him to be a leader. Rather, it’s the fact that his parents treated him as their firstborn child that shaped his attitude and behavior.

The Sociology of Birth Order While we might be tempted to think similarities or differences among siblings are the result of inborn personality traits or birth order, Dalton Conley’s book The Pecking Order reminds us that families are affected by social forces. These forces in turn shape children’s identities and opportunities. In other words, even though we grow up in the same families, events like economic changes, illness, and death affect us differently based on our age and gender. Conley used census data, the Panel Study of Income Dynamics and the General Social Survey as well as indepth interviews with siblings to arrive at his findings on birth order. Generally, the wealthier a family, the better able they are to protect children during difficult times.

All children struggle when a parent dies, becomes ill or loses a job, but those with larger financial savings have more resources to cope. Children might attend therapy, or those that develop behavioral problems can be sent to special schools. Lower income families might need children to pitch in with household chores or jobs instead of pursuing extracurricular interests or higher education.

A child in pain who acts out might find themselves in trouble with the law instead of in therapy. Remarriage after the death or divorce might benefit children in some circumstances.

This might not be surprising, but some other findings are. Social psychology research and popular wisdom tell us that middle children are long suffering but Conley’s research findings teach us that this is usually only the case in large families with fewer resources to go around.

Birth order theories are more complicated than assumed at first glance because they are affected by forces outside the family as well as forces within the family. The real issue is, how do these forces affect how we parent? Being conscious of our own behavior as parents and how it affects our parenting will help us honor the individual journeys, personalities and choices of each of our children. Isn’t that the very purpose of parenting?

Laura Reagan-Porras, MS is a parenting journalist, parenting coach and family sociologist. She can be reached through her parenting resources website, www.heart2heartparents.com.

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O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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september

events

Story Times Downtown Public Library Story Times.

Baby Story time (ages 0-1) Fridays 10:15 & 11:15am. Wonderful Ones Story time, 10:15 & 11am, Terrific Twos Story time, Tues 10:15 & 11:00, Preschool Story time (ages 3-6), Weds 10:15 & 11:00, Sensory Storytime (for kids with sensory integration issues or special needs) Weds 1:00pm. Ph 541.682.8316 Family Story Time (all ages). Fri 10:15am and Fridays at 10:15am at Bethel Branch Library. Ph 541.682.8316 Preschool Story time (ages 3-6) Weds 10:00am. Lapsit Story time (ages 0-3) Weds 10am, Sensory Storytime (for kids with sensory integration issues or special needs) every other Thurs, Springfield Public Library, Ph 541.726.3766

Curious Kids Storytime with Taylor. 2nd and 4th Sunday at 6:30pm. Springfield Public Library, Ph 541.726.3766 Barnes & Noble weekly story time.

Whimsical Weds 6:30pm. Toddler-Time, Weds 10am. Saturdays at 11am, Ph 541.687.0356

On-Going Events Public Skate @ The Ice Center. Call for skate times. Ph 541.682.3615 Saturday Market/Farmers Market.

The oldest, open-air market in the United States offers great food, local crafts and live entertainment. Every Saturday, April-Nov, 8th & Oak St. Rain or shine. 10:00am – 5pm, Ph 541.686.8885, FREE! “2PM Talks”. A docent-led talk every Tues thru Sun at the Museum of Natural and Cultural History, included with price of admission. Ph 541.346.3024

“Tapping into Clean Water” at The Science Factory Children’s Museum. This Summer plunge into water science with this mini exhibition that explores how clean drinking water gets to your home - through August.

Also come check out our great shows in the Dome! Features change weekly, with Seasonal Stargazing everyday at 1:30. Ph 541.682.7888 After Hours SUP Paddle. Concierge service provided including a first class gear fitting board, paddle, personal flotation device, dry bag and invasive species permit. SUP2UOREGON will load and unload your board and get you in and out of the water, hassle free. Weather permitting. Autzen Canoe Canal, Mon/Wed 5:308:00pm, $15-55, Ph 541.799.5020

Outlying Area Events Walterville Community Fair. Fair baking/ canning/art and more contests, vendors, parade, kids games, BBQ chicken dinner, doggie contest, fun run and more. Sept 10th, 9am – 5pm, Walterville Grange, FREE! Ph 541-746-9974 Rods ‘N Rhodies Invitational Car Show.

It’s going to be a weekend of fun as Old Town comes alive with the sights and sounds of some of America’s best rods and custom cruisers. Sept 9th – 11th Old Town Florence, Fri 10-7, Sat 7-4pm, Sun 7am – noon. FREE! Ph 541.997.3128 Veneta Harvest Festival. Featuring a pancake breakfast from 8 – 1oam, vendors, music and Kids Zone, quilt show 10am – 3pm. Chili cook-off judging at 11am, and a Farmers Market. Sept 10th, 8am-3pm, FREE! Ph 541.935.8443 Columbia Drag Boat Association NW Nationals. The Columbia Drag Boat Association (CDBA) offers a wide variety of class competition

Children can benefit from age-appropriate technology, but watching TV or playing on a computer too long means missing out on other important activities. Playing outside, talking with friends and reading are all vital for kids.

Free, family friendly, fun!

Every Saturday 10 AM–5 PM at 8th & Oak Rain or Shine

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Shows s for kid 1 at 1 !

in a safe, fun and family-oriented atmosphere and some of the hottest action in the entire country. Dexter Reservoir, Sept 10th and 11th, 9am, $10-12, Ph 541.419.7329 Cycle the Lakes Bike Ride. Choose 32, 42, 67, 77 or 102 mile rides. Food stations, SAG support and great volunteers ensure a great ride. All routes include the nationally known Row River Trail. New and experienced riders welcome. Sept 17th Bohemia Park, Cottage Grove, 7am-5pm, $29-49, Ph 541.913.4470

1 THURSDAY Gov’t Mule at Cuthbert Amphitheater.

Smokin’ Mule 2016 Summer Tour comes through Eugene with very special guest Blackberry Smoke. This is an all ages event. Cuthbert Amphitheater, gates open at 5pm, $35-40, Ph 541.762.8099

2 FRIDAY Fiesta Cultural. Salsa dance party with live music from Carlos Cascante y Su Tumbao, contemporary Latino art, food vendors, crafts and more! Downtown Library, 5:30-8:00pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.5450 MECCA’s Object After Art Challenge. Over 100 artists participated and were given a mystery box of scrap materials and two months to create.

This exhibition is the celebration of the artists and their work. Celebrity judges will award prizes and refreshments will be provided. MECCA, 6-8pm, FREE! Ph 541.302.1810 Teens: Locker Crafts. Make decorations for your school locker – including bubble magnets, tin bins, magnetic poetry and more. Bethel and Sheldon Branches of Eugene Library, 4pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316 First Friday Art Walk. A monthly art walk hosted and led by special community guests.

Enjoy wandering the local galleries and venues and viewing a variety of art. 5:30-8:00pm, FREE! Ph 541-485-2278 Free First Friday. Jordan Schnitzer Museum of Art and Museum of Natural and Cultural History allow you to enjoy the museum’s new exhibits and old classics for FREE today! 11:00am-5pm

3 SATURDAY First Saturday Park Walk. Join this interpretive walk led by a naturalist. Stewart Pond Overlook.

Meet in the parking lot off Stewart Rd. 9-11am, FREE! Ph 541.682.5329 Family Music Time. This week, Emily Fox entertains with lively banjo tunes. Downtown Library, 10:15am, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316 UofO Duck vs UC Davis. Welcome to the 2016 UO Ducks Football Season in this season opener at Autzen Stadium. 2pm, Ph 541.346.4461

4 SUNDAY It’s a good idea to put some rules in place.

Let your kids know what they are allowed to use and when they can use it. Discuss this as a family so that your kids can have a say too.

For more information and parenting tips, visit www.lanekids.org/triplep

Leukemia Cup Regatta . Gates open at 2 p.m. with kid’s crafts, vollyball and an open swimming area. The first boats take off at 2:30pm. followed by paddle board races, zuma races ending with a BBQ and silent auction. Eugene Yacht Club, 2-7pm, $30-100, Ph 503.245.9866 Pretty Lights. Pretty Lights comes to Cuthbert with a full live band and opening act Emancipator. Gates open at 5:30pm. Cuthbert Amphitheater, $40, Ph 800.992.8499

6 TUESDAY www.eugenesaturdaymarket.org

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

Teens @ 4:30. Springfield Public Library, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766

Gov’t Mule Thursday, September 1st Oliver! See the 16th 2016 DK BMX Gold Cup Finals. See the 16th

18 SUNDAY Family Fun: Yoga. Kids and family: try yoga!

Brynne Blevins Andrus will lead this playful session of breathing, stretching, mindfulness, movement, and song. Downtown Library, 1pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316

continued on next page…

Farmers Markets 7 WEDNESDAY

11 SUNDAY

Ideas on Tap: Just Toss It! Food Waste and its Impacts. Food waste is a serious problem affecting our natural resources and the environment in general. What exactly are the issues, and what can we do about them?

Join the panelists for a discussion about our relationships with food, and some of the key cultural explanations for food waste in our society. Marketplace@Sprout! 6-8pm, Ph 3463024, FREE!

Family Fun: Wetland Mammals. Meet the mammals who live in the wetlands! Join naturalist Dave Walp and WREN show how to increase sightings by identifying different mammals, their tracks, and their scat. Downtown Library, 1pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316

9 FRIDAY Little Wonders: Stories and Activities for Pre-K. This month, Hiding in Plain Sight. Animals come in different shapes and sizes and live in all kinds of environments. Some animals have special features that can help them hide from predators. Children will discover how animals use camouflage to survive, and they’ll learn how to camouflage their very own “animal” against predators. Museum of Natural and Cultural History, ages 3-5, 10:30am – 12:30, Free-$5, Ph 541-346-3024

Coburg Antique & Vintage Fair. Shop for rare collectables, beautiful heirlooms and period pieces. Enjoy live music and have a picnic lunch, or there’s plenty of food vendors offering great food. Free parking at Coburg exit 199 just off I5 with a free shuttle to downtown. Dowtown Coburg, 8am-4pm, $5, Ph 541.357.7055

13 TUESDAY Teens @ 4:30. Springfield Public Library, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766

15 THURSDAY Magic Men Live! (adult only event). One hot

Second Friday Art Walk. Starts at Springfield City Hall, 5:00pm, FREE! Light the Grill. Join us in the park for delicious BBQ food, raffle, silent auction, and live music from Blue Valentine. A fund raiser for Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Alton Baker Park, 11am2pm, $12, Ph 458.210.2010

16 FRIDAY 2016 DK Gold Cup Finals Northwest.

Northwest regional championship BMX event at Emerald Valley BMX in Eugene. Emerald Valley BMX, times vary, see website. Ph 541.543.4894 Oliver! Relive the unforgettable Charles Dickens classic story set in 19th century London of an innocent orphan living amongst double-dealing thieves and conmen. The Shedd Institute, 7:30pm, $22-38, Ph 541.434.7000

17 SATURDAY Mixed Media for Kids. Ephemeral Art. (ages 7-12). Springfield Public Library. 10:30am, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766 Family Music Time. This week, Rich Glauber delights all ages with interactive music play.

Downtown Library, 10:15am, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316

Hideaway Bakery Farmers Market.

Every Saturday 9am-3pm (per vendor availability), behind Mazzi’s Restaurant, Ph 541.868.1982 Fairmount Neighborhood Farmer’s Market. Sundays 10-2pm at 19th and Agate St, across from Prince Pucklers. June through Oct. FREE! MarketPlace @ Sprout! Showcases the best of Lane County’s organic and locallygrown farm products. Farm fresh eggs, local meats and fish, plus produce, grains and artisan goodies. Music and activities vary week to week. Sprout! Every Friday, rain or shine, 3-7pm, Ph 541.345.7106 Lane County Farmers Market. Over 85 growers and producers, grown locally.

Every Sat 9am-3pm & Tues 10am-3pm, April – Sept, 8th & Oak Blocks. Winter Farmers Market: Feb – March, park blocks.

Holiday Farmers Market: Mid Nov – Mid Dec, Lane Events Center, Sat 10-5/Sun 11-5pm. Ph 541.431.4923 Winter Green Farmers Market.

Emmaus Lutheran Church, Weds 2pm–6pm, June–Oct. Ph 541.743.3366 Veneta Farmers Market. Every Sat 10am–2pm, June–Sept, Luther Lane & Territorial, Ph 541.285.4376

10 SATURDAY Family Music Time. This week, Kris Olsen of Do Re Play inspires learning through musical exploration and fun. Downtown Library, 10:15am, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316

Cottage Grove Market. 10th & Washington, Mon – Sat, 10am–6pm yearround, Ph 541.337.7684 South Valley Farmers Market.

Featuring food producers, wild crafters, music and fun! Greet old and new friends as you eat fresh and buy local in the Grove. Opal Whiteley Park, Thursday 4-7pm, FREE!

UofO Duck vs Virginia. Oregon Ducks take on Virginia Cavaliers at Autzen Stadium. 7:30pm, Ph 541.346.4461 Late Summer Wildflowers Hike. Tour of the amazing diversity of wildflowers which wait to bloom until the end of summer. Walk along a wet prairie and down to the river to see emergent vegetation in bloom. 10am – noon, $5/Free to members, 541.747.3817

night at McDonald Theatre, 8pm, $25-100, Ph 541.345.4442

Creswell Farmer’s Market. Every Tues May through October. Farm fare ranges from local fruits and vegetables to home grown meats. 4pm - 6pm, First and Oregon, Ph 541.895.2096

Songs & Stories Tour Wednesday, September 28th

Food for Lane County Youth Farmers Market. Thurs 2pm–6pm, June–Oct, Sacred Heart Medical Center at RiverBend.

Ph 541.343.2822

O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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Whose Live Anyway?

Friday September 23rd Oliver! See the 16th

24 SATURDAY Alton Baker Dog Park Volunteer Day. All paws needed to make sure this remains one of Eugene’s best places to enjoy time off-leash.

Spread gravel, cleanup the fence line, and learn about local animal rescue groups and how to get involved. This is a family-friendly event – no experience necessary. Alton Baker Dog Park, 9:00am-noon, FREE! Ph 541.682.4831 Family Music Time. This week, musical educator Bryan Reed makes learning rock! Downtown Library, 10:15am, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316 UofO Duck vs Colorado. Oregon Ducks take on Colorado Buffaloes at Autzen Stadium. Time TBD, Ph 541.346.4461 Oliver! See the 16th Family Walk. Join Arboretum Nature Guide, Rick Chase on a walk for families to explore seasonal changes at the Arboretum. Search for signs of animals preparing for winter! Mt. Pisgah, 10amnoon, $5/Free to members, 541.747.3817 Maker Expo: See & Do. Do-it-yourselfers, innovators, artists, and crafters of all ages: drop in for demonstrations and hands-on fun with maker tech tools. This free event will highlight a 3D printer, green screen photo booth, voice-modulating audio system, Makey Makey invention kits, and much more. Downtown Library, 2-4pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316 Oliver! 2:00pm, see the 16th

New 4J Charter School!

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YOUTH CONCERTS

TRCS is a public charter school catering to students, ages 14-19, who learn best in an experiential format.

TRCS is for students who love being outside and prefer to learn by doing.

We link our classroom learing with outdoor activities, conservation projects, and tons of field trips.

Tuesday, Nov. 15, 2016 Explore what it means to compose and create music.

Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2017

To learn more or register: eugenesymphony.org/education

S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

25 SUNDAY Sunday Streets. This traffic-free event opens up a 2-mile stretch for people to walk, roll or dance through the streets. Homes along the route are encouraged to participate with garage sales, lemonade stands, or simply pulling out lawn chairs and watching people pass by. 12pm4pm, FREE! Ph 541.501.0390

Curious Kids Storytime with Taylor.

Springfield Public Library. 6:30pm, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766

Family Fun: Worldwide Stories. Talented storyteller Kelly Terwilliger will perform her favorite tales from all over the world. Downtown Library, 1pm, FREE! Ph 541.682.8316

20 TUESDAY

Oliver! 2:00pm, see the 16th

Little Family Yoga with Brynne Blevins.

Springfield Public Library, 10:30am, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766 Teens @ 4:30. Springfield Public Library, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766

22 THURSDAY

Sing and play recorder or violin with the Eugene Symphony!

14

2016 DK BMX Gold Cup Finals. See the 16th

19 MONDAY

A Program of Carnegie Hall’s Weill Music Institute

(541) 349-5055 TwinRiversCharter.org

Bird Walk. For people with all levels of birding experience. We’ll use vocalizations, habitat, and behavior clues for identification of our summer and year-round residents. Mt. Pisgah, 8am-11am, $5/Free to members, 541.747.3817

Eugene Symphony, Schumann and Brahms.

Danail has waited seven years to conduct one of his favorites, Brahm’s sweeping Fourth Symphony, which closes with an inspiring chorale based on a passacaglia - a 17th century dance accompanied by a repeated bass line. Hult Center, 8pm, Ph 541.682.5000

23 FRIDAY LEGO Club for kids. Springfield Public Library, in children’s area, 2-4pm, Ph 541-726-3766 Whose Live Anyway? Hilarious, improvised comedy and song from the cast of the Emmy nominated TV show “Whose Line Is It Anyway?”

90 minutes of hilarious, improvised comedy and song. Hult Center, 8pm, $35-51, Ph 541.682.5000

27 TUESDAY Teens @ 4:30. Springfield Public Library, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766

28 WEDNESDAY Songs and Stories Tour. The Songs & Stories Tour featuring Steven Curtis Chapman, Mac Powell of Third Day and Brandon Heath. Hult Center, 7pm, $29-90.50, Ph 541.682.5000

30 FRIDAY Take and Make Craft. Passive, self-directed activity in the Children’s Area. Springfield Public Library, All-day, FREE! Ph 541-726-3766 Def Leppard. With special guests REO Speedwagon and Tesla, Def Leppard continues to be one of the most important forces in rock music with 100 million records sold. Matthew Knight Arena, 7pm, $29.50-129

Def Leppard Friday, September 30th

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Cub Scouts

Aim for character, citizenship, and fitness For boys 1st grade and up.

Begin your adventure today.

otcbsa.org/join 541-485-4433 O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

15

Movie Time

by Bonnie L. Harris

A Brave Boy and a Loveable Dragon Pete and Elliot meet in the forest.

Walt Disney Pictures Rated: PG Now in theatres

P

ete’s Dragon, the new liveaction feature from the Disney Studios, begins with an unexpected tragedy that sends a young boy on the adventure of a lifetime. Thankfully, this 2016 remake of Pete’s Dragon is a sweet, warm-hearted, magical tale that’s a far cry from the dour 1977 musical version. Director David Lowery shifts music to the background allowing Pete, played wonderfully by Oakes Fegley, and

Elliot, the fuzzy green dragon, to develop a steadfast friendship that will carry them through the mishaps to come.

Ne i t h e r Pe te n o r E l l i o t can predict , however, the consequences when they are discovered as loggers cut through old-growth forest that has been Elliot’s hiding place for years and Pete’s playground after his parents were lost in a fateful car accident. While the local authorities try to figure out how Pete survived alone in the forest

for so long, Elliot is left behind searching for his lost friend. The two reunite after Pete returns to look for Elliot with the help of Grace Meacham, a sympathetic forest ranger played by Bryce Dallas Howard. Grace, her father, and her stepdaughter, Natalie, have heard the outlandish stories about the elusive Millhaven Dragon, but thanks to Pete, they suddenly they come face to face with the gentle, snaggle-toothed beast. Unfortunately, the nasty loggers have also found Elliot’s

FOR THE PARENTS The Joyful Noise Florence Foster Jenkins 20th Century Fox & Pathé, Rated: PG-13 Now in theatres

P

lato once said, “Music gives a soul to the universe.” So it would not be unusual to make an uplifting film about one woman’s dream to sing at Carnegie Hall. But what if that woman was Florence Foster Jenkins, the wealthy New York socialite who had absolutely no singing talent whatsoever? Armed with enough money and wielding substantial influence, not to mention quick maneuvering by an adoring and adept husband, the feat just might be a success.

That’s the premise of the new biographical

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

den and they come hunting for him at the exact same moment.

Pete, Natalie, and Grace must eventually save Elliot and return him to the forest, but it’s a dangerous and thrilling chase to freedom. Pete’s Dragon focuses on loyalty to friends, rekindling the bonds of family, and the importance of looking past our differences. The spectacular CGI animation coupled with very solid performances from its actors make Pete’s Dragon a terrific family film that’s destined to be another Disney classic.

delicate ego. Shifting from laugh-out-loud moments to tender revelations about life dreams, disappointments, and self-fulfillment, Florence Foster Jenkins sails toward a lighthearted albeit unpredictable finish that proves that beautiful music is in the ear of the beholder.

comedy based on the real life of Florence Foster Jenkins and the gamble pays off beautifully.

We arrive in Madame Florence’s cloistered, aristocratic world in 1944 just as she’s inspired to renew her musical career.

Very quickly we learn that Florence and her Florence’s assessment of her beloved Mr. Bayfield talent has been skewed by the good intentions of St. Clair Bayfield, her supportive, but misguided spouse. As Florence sallies forth on her quest, St. Clair and her pianist, Cosme McMoon, scramble to control the damage and minimize the pain to Florence’s

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• Calendar of Events • Business Directory • Parenting Articles • Weekly Recipes • Camps and Classes

O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

17

Little Timbers Fall Skills Academy and League

Eugene Timbers Fútbol Club 541-343-5100 www.eugenetimbers.org

Sept. 12 - Oct. 21 6 week program with M-W or T-TH practices.

Games on Fridays at LCC

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

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A

Earthtalk from the Editors of “E” the Environmental Magazine

Dear EarthTalk: I am interested in helping my school get solar panels on the roof to show students how we can be part of the solution to the climate crisis. Are there any resources or grants out there to help schools go solar?

— Charles Hamilton, Warren, OH

P

utting solar panels on your school is a great idea, not only to provide a free source of electricity, but also as a real-world way to teach students about the need for more renewable energy options and to make the school community part of the solution to our climate woes. School buildings are typically built with large, flat rooftops that are ideal candidates for solar installations.

According to the Foundation for Environmental Education’s Solar School Initiative, some 4,000 public and pr ivate scho ol systems around the country have already installed solar panels at their own expense, or with funds raised through parent-

teacher associations, student groups, individual donors and foundations. Analysts estimate that an additional 125,000 schools nationwide are good candidates for going solar and reaping the financial benefits of free energ y. Developing re n e w a b l e a l te r n a t i v e s i s essential to our transition away from dirty fossil fuel sources.

Grant programs vary from state to state, though some can be very supportive of municipal solar projects. In Massachusetts, for example, cities qualified as “Green Communities” can apply for clean energy grants through a state-run program. California also has a number of solar-

friendly programs that schools can capitalize on, including the School Facility Modernization Grants and Self-Generation Incentive program. Several other states offer similar programs.

There are also many federal grant opportunities, primarily from the U.S. Depar tment of Energy (DOE). Their Loan Programs Office works with municipal and commercial applicants to help realize their energ y goals. The Office of Energy Efficiency and Renewable Energy shares this mission, and recently made an investment of $19 million to improve our nation’s buildings, specifically naming hospitals and schools as top priorities.

There are also non-government options that can be utilized to bring solar to your local school district. The American Solar Energy Society (ASES) offers a wide array of resources for achieving successful solar school programs and for navigating issues around choosing a system.

Their partnership with The Solar Foundation’s BDR Fund has set a goal of 20,000 solar systems installed at K-12 schools by the year 2020.

Another grant opportunity

comes from the American Electric Power Foundation’s Learning from Light program, which has sponsored over 100 schools’ transitions to solar, starting with Bluffsview Elementary in Worthington, Ohio back in 1998.

And the Walmart Foundation recently pledged to fund solar conversions at 20 schools in large cities around the country. A list of further programs offered by a number of organizations can be found at solarschools.org.

For more tips, check out the National Renewable Energ y Laboratory’s report “Solar Schools Assessment and Implementation Project: Financing Options for Solar Installations on K–12 Schools,” which explains the myriad ways to finance and own solar installations at schools— including how to choose a location to maximize benefits.

CONTACTS: Solar School Initiative, www.solarschools.org; ASES, www. ases.org; DOE Loan Programs Office, energy.gov/lpo/loan-programs-office; American Electric Power Foundation, www.aep.com; NREL, www.nrel.gov.

EarthTalk® is produced by Roddy Scheer & Doug Moss and is a registered trademark of the nonprofit Earth Action Network. To donate, visit www.earthtalk.org. Send questions to: question@earthtalk.org

The non-profit Black Rock Solar helped Rainshadow Community Charter High School in Reno, Nevada install a 31 kilowatt photovoltaic array in 2010.

O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

19

Style Savvy Helping Kids Dress Well and Feel Great

E

by Malia Jacobson

xperts say one of the best ways to encourage autonomy, self-esteem and “body positivity”—a term used by counselors and educators that means body confidence—is to let kids choose their own clothes from a young age. Easier said than done. Although children might have strident opinions about their clothing, they don’t always choose well: think parkas in July, tank tops in December, and muddy boots on class picture day. Learning what to wear, when, is a big part of looking and feeling good, and it’s possible to guide kids along the path to making positive wardrobe choices that help them put their best foot forward. Read on for age-by-age guidance.

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

Early Years 0-5 • Mum’s the word Teaching kids to feel comfortable in their own skin leads to fewer power struggles over clothing later on, says parent educator Laura Brimberry, MSW, of Raleigh, North Carolina.

As toddlers and preschoolers learn to dress themselves, allow as much free choice as you can (even if it means that your four-year-old wears a tutu to preschool) and enact the age-old rule ‘If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything.’ The best way to encourage body-positivity in children is not to say much about their body at all, says Brimberry.

“Children are hard-wired to love their bodies as to think of their own body as normal, because it’s what they’ve got!”

Parents can help guide good choices by stashing out-of-season clothing outside your child’s room; establishing a habit of selecting clothing the night before gives children a chance to think through their choices before the morning rush—“Hey, if I wear my rainboots to school tomorrow, I might not be able to run fast in P.E.!”

School Years 6-12 • School rules School-age kids may begin to encounter messages about ‘modesty,’ sometimes via school dress codes. Parents should tread carefully here, says psychotherapist and parent educator Carmen Cool, MA, of Boulder, Colorado. “The word ‘modesty’ has

become synonymous with virtue, purity, and decency, so it can be easy for these messages to feel ‘blamey’ somehow,” she says. And school dress codes and modesty messaging are often gendered—aimed, subtly or not, at young girls—and embedded with sexism and body shame, she notes. Parents can help reframe these messages as issues of boundaries, instead of modesty.

“We have individual boundaries we agree on as a culture. I encourage asking questions that help children discover what their personal boundaries are and engage in critical thinking about [dress code] rules.” Consistently conveying that there is nothing wrong with their body can help school-agers discover what type of clothing makes them feel good, and learn to equate dressing appropriately with self-respect, rather than covering up for others’ sake.

Teen Years 13-18 • Going pro Teenagers may have a number of reasons to trade their everyday jeans and joggers for sharp professional dress: Job and college interviews, presentations, and school and community banquets, for example. But in

our increasingly casual culture, teens may not understand what dressing professionally means, or that fashionably short skirts, sneakers, and athletic attire won’t fly in the professional world. Once again, it’s vital to frame these discussions in terms of respect and appropriateness, rather than a need to cover up, to avoid subtle cues that teens may internalize as body shame, says Cool.

Ultimately, professional dress is about making sure that people hear what you’re saying, and aren’t distracted by your clothing,

for both boys and girls; sloppy, ill-fitting, or too-trendy clothes can be as distracting as wearing a swimsuit to a job interview. Teens who master professional dress have an edge in academics and the workplace, says Brimberry.

“People who show up looking clean, sharp, modest are showing respect for the employer and his or her work.”

Malia Jacobson is an award-winning health and parenting journalist and mom of three. Her latest book is Sleep Tight, Every Night: Helping Toddlers and Preschoolers Sleep Well Without Tears, Tricks, or Tirades.

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21

The Class

Read & Play

by Jennifer Galvin

Read Your Way Back to School!

Crayons, backpacks, markers, recess and…books! It’s September and that means the school bus will soon be taking kids back to school. With the lazy summer days behind us, we’ll have to read and play together when the school bus brings them home. Take advantage of the last few days of summer to enjoy these back to school books and activities together, so you’ll be ready for the day that big, yellow bus rounds the corner!

READ… Absolutely One Thing: Featuring Charlie and Lola Candlewick Press, $17.99, ages 4-8 by Lauren Child

Fans of Charlie and Lola will be absolutely delighted to see them back in this terrific number adventure this fall! Mom says Charlie and Lola can each pick out one thing at the store, not one thing to share, but one each, so two total. An adventure ensues, as the trip to the store is full of number adventures including time, counting, addition, and just all out fun! Join Charlie and Lola for a fabulous adventure this fall and count and play along on the way to the store—you’ll be glad you did.

Mission: Back to School Random House, $16.99, ages 4-8 by Susan Hood

When the mission is back to school, grab this book to get ready! From meeting your intelligence officer (the teacher) to practicing decoding (spelling) this book is full of

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

fun missions that will make a school day seem like an action packed adventure waiting to happen. Bold, colorful illustrations fill this charming back to school book that will have you ready for action a you head back to school this year!

School’s First Day of School Roaring Brook Press, $17.99, ages 4-8 by Adam Rex

When Frederick Douglas Elementary is built one summer, and his doors open for children in the fall, neither he nor the children know exactly what to expect. The janitor tells him a bit about what to expect, but the school has no idea what is in store. As children arrive, the adventure ensues! Bright, bold illustrations fill this book about a school that experiences his first day along with the children. Fabulous!

Beach Lane Books, $17.99, ages 4-8 by Boni Ashburn

Come along as twenty children gather together from around town to become a class. From sleepy kids and their alarm clocks beeping, to fixing hair, to putting on shoes, see how the class gets to school. Playful, bright illustrations fill this great first day adventure, sure to be a back to school favorite!

Ada Twist, Scientist Abrams, $17.95; ages 5-8 by Andrea Beaty

Ada Marie doesn’t say a word until she is three, she just observes everything. Then, when she finally does speak, she simply says why. From that day forward, she keeps wondering why and doing research and trying to figure everything out. She doesn’t ever stop or slow down. Follow along on this fabulous journey with Ada Twist and her love of questions and finding out why. Perhaps you’ll discover a love of questions that may just lead you to the world of science yourself.

Whimsical, bright, vivid illustrations and rhyming, rhythmic text fill this enchanting quest towards scientific discovery.

Place Value Holiday House, $17.95; ages 5-9 by David A. Adler

The monkeys in this book are cooking up some great place value recipes for you. Banana cupcakes are the recipe of the day and the monkeys are using place value to walk you through the cupcake baking. From measuring the ingredients all the way to counting the sprinkles, join these adorable monkeys to learn all about place value and bake some fun banana cupcakes!

! s e ti G

... and PLAY! Make a cool magnet to hang up your child’s favorite artwork from school Materials: Clothes pins, c rayons , roll o f s elfadhesive magnetic strip, mailing labels, Tacky glue, scissors, and permanent marker.

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M aterial s: M a g n e t i c locker mirror (I got mine at a dollar store), 4 pencils, a pack of “Pencil Topper” erasers, Tacky glue.

Directions: Spread Tacky glue around the edges of the locker mirror. Glue two pencils eraser side up on the left side of the mirror and two pencils eraser side down on the right side of the mirror. Fill in between the pencils on the short sides of the mirrors on the top and bottom by gluing on “Pencil Topper” erasers. Let dry.

Create some alphabet “Go Fish” cards Materials: Old magazines, index cards, scissors, and glue.

After School Program for grades K–5 Look forward to an afternoon of dancing, fun, and creativity.

Transportation is provided from select Eugene schools.

Directions: Glue two crayons onto the clothes pin. Cut two small ovals out of mailing labels to use to “label” your crayons. On one label, write your child’s name. On the other label, write either “artwork” or “school work.” Place the labels on the crayons where it usually says the color (example: Ryan’s Artwork).

Put a magnet on the back of the clothes pin. Use this magnet to hang up your child’s favorite school or art work on your refrigerator.

Decorate a mirror for your locker

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Directions: Cut a large capital letter and a lower case letter out of your old magazines for each letter of the alphabet. Glue each letter onto an index card. Find pictures of two items that start with each letter of the alphabet and cut them out. Glue one item that begins with the letter on each letter card. Play “Go Fish” and watch your children learn while playing!

Demos, Samples, Vendors & Your Questions Answered

Jennifer Galvin is never far from her children, a paintbrush, or a good book. You can find her on the web at www.jennifergalvin.com.

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O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

23

What

POLITICS Can Teach Our Kids F

by Christa Melnyk Hines

rom yelling newsroom pundits and vigorous dinner party debates to divisive Facebook exchanges, tis’ the season when there’s virtually no escape from politics. Your kids may come home with questions about opinions overheard at school or elsewhere.

From a parenting perspective, the democratic process--and political shenanigans--provides plenty of fodder for teaching kids lessons in independent thinking, respectful discourse, values and civics.

Nurture independent thinkers Take advantage of the political process to help your children learn to think for themselves. Ask your children open-ended questions to hear their point of views. “Find out what they’re thinking. What you want to do is stimulate their analytic, natural human curiosity,” says Dr. Fran Walfish, a child and family psychotherapist and author of The Self Aware Parent: Resolving Conf lict and Building a Better Bond with Your Child. Watch the speeches and debates together. Ask your child who he thinks is telling the truth based on body language or who seems more respectful during a debate. Whether you agree or not, ask her: “Why do you feel that way?

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

How would you solve the problem?” Share your opinions with your children by prefacing your comments with “I feel” or “I think” and ask questions like: “I wonder how he’ll make that happen? What do you think? How would you make it fair if you were president?”

Avoid anger As hard as it may be, try to refrain from making judgmental comments or calling candidates with whom you disagree colorful names. “Shouting at the TV, or at one another, presents a very negative example of responding to conflicting opinions,” says Mary Jane McKittrick, author of the Boomer and Halley children’s series (written for ages 4 to 8), including the Mom’s Choice award-winning book Boomer and Halley: Election Day. Through humor and embedded life lessons, McKittrick’s books tell stories of families and communities resolving difficult challenges by working together.

Model respectful dialogue Not all parents agree on politics, but what matters is how they discuss the issues in front of their children without raising a child’s anxiety. Make ground rules with your spouse before engaging in the discussion: No interrupting, take turns listening and no put-downs, insults or blaming. And, if you come to an impasse, agree to disagree. “I would love for parents to respect each others point of views. I would also hope that they will respect their children’s point of view,” Walfish says. “Be able to tolerate differences.

We still love each other, and I can tolerate you having powerfully different feelings than mine.” If you find yourself getting drawn into a heated argument around the table with loved ones, keep your cool and suggest you pick up the conversation at another time.

Play nice--in politics?!

Political rhetoric may be difficult for your child to comprehend, but behavior in politics can often parallel real-life situations your child can relate to about how we should treat each other and who we can trust. “Here we are: two political figures. They’re going to say their beliefs right out front, but wouldn’t it be nice if that was all they were doing,” Walfish says. “Instead what they’re doing is using put-downs, criticisms, (and) willing to go forward at all costs to win.” Perhaps the vindictive nature of politics will never change, but parents can use examples of how politicians conduct themselves to teach values about what it means to win honorably, treat others with respect and be a trustworthy friend. For example, on the playground, a child might promise your child that he can have the ball next, but then passes the ball to an ally or

continues to hog the ball. Even a young child understands that the other child’s actions are unfair. “A good friend is someone who treats you right all of the time. And that’s what we’re looking for in politics,” Walfish says. “And a lot of times people will say anything to get what they want, which is to win. Our job is to try to figure out who’s telling the truth, who’s going to deliver on the goods.”

Civics 101 Talk to your kids about the democratic process. Take your child to the voting booth and follow the results on election night together to help her see the election process in action and the connection between your vote and why it matters. Explain that politicians are public servants and they usually enter the political process in an attempt to make a difference in the lives of

Resources for Kids, Politics & Government BOOKS • Duck for President by Doreen Cronin • This Little President: A Presidential Primer by Joan Holub (board book) • That’s Not Fair!: Getting to Know Your Rights and Freedoms (CitizenKid) by Danielle McLaughlin (release date April 1, 2016) • Doodles U.S. Government Coloring Fun by Setria James (release date April 1, 2016)

• One Vote, Two Votes, I Vote, You Vote

by Bonnie Worth (release date August 2, 2016) MOVIES • 1776 (ages 8+) • Young Mr. Lincoln (ages 10+) • Gandhi (ages 12+) • Dave (ages 12+) • All the President’s Men (ages 13+)

citizens. “Parents can offer examples from their lives to illustrate giving to others as a positive way to explain politics,” McKittrick says. “After all, politics exist in our families, communities, schools and workplaces--not just at the ballot box.”

Freelance journalist Christa Melnyk Hines, resides with her opinionated family, which includes her husband, two rambunctious boys and a pair of playful dogs. Christa is the author of Happy, Healthy & Hyperconnected: Raise a Thoughtful Communicator in a Digital World.

WEBSITES • KidPresident.com featuring 12-year-old Robby Novak, a YouTube sensation, television star and co-author of Kid President’s Guide to Being Awesome • Kids.gov https://kids.usa.gov/ • Ben’s Guide to the U.S. Government http://bensguide.gpo.gov/ • CongressforKids.net

(Source: CommonSenseMedia.org)

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Rescue Spotlight

R

osie is a very sweet and wise 8 year old lady who has nothing but love in her heart. She can be a bit shy, but has a hard time hiding her wagging tail when meeting people for the first time. Rosie does well with kids over six and with small dogs; however she has a harder time with dogs her own size. She enjoys getting out and would enjoy gentle play and relaxing neighborhood walks.

After all the adventures, Rosie would love to end the day with some nice relaxing cuddle time.

Greenhill Humane Society is open for adoptions and visits Friday-Tuesday, 11am-6pm (closed Wed & Thurs) at 88530 Green Hill Road in Eugene. For more information call (541) 689-1503 or visit www.green-hill.org

B

LACKIE is a sleek and beautiful 8-year-old black domestic short hair male kitty. He is a gentle and friendly older cat who was rescued from a garbage dumpster behind an apartment building. He has so much love to give, and would enjoy warming up someone's lap, watching TV with you, or watching you do the dishes. Blackie would be so happy just to have someone who appreciates his sweet, laid-back personality! He enjoys exploring the house, finding a sunny spot, loves snacks, catnip and catnip toys. He gets along well with other easygoing cats, and also great with gentle kids of all ages, but was scare d of the dogs he has met so far. Blackie is neutered, is up to date on vaccinations, tested negative for FELV/FIV, is micro chipped and has been dewormed and received flea treatment. He comes with a free vet visit and his adoption fee is just $60, which helps us cover our costs.

Blackie is currently in foster care. Call Beth at 541-255-9296 if you’d like more information or to meet this sweet boy.

Lifegate Christian internationaL sChooL Global Education through Christian Discipleship

• Now enrolling High School and Middle School • Automatic tuition discounts for Veterans/Military, First Responders and Ministry as well as other possible grants • Accredited by AdvanceEd. Introducing new: • International Programs and Summer Camps • Flexible Homeschool and Part-Time Options • Dual College Credit Options

Lifegate isn’t just a school, we’re family! Come see what we’re all about.

21211 Coburg Rd, Harrisburg OR • 541-689-5847 • www.lifegatechristian.org

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S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6 • O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M

Move Your Business to the Head of the Class.

To advertise, contact Sandy • 541.683.7452 • sandy@oregonfamily.com O R E G O N F A M I L Y. C O M • S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 6

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Wellness is contagious.

A community isn’t a thing, it’s people. Living with and for each other. So at PeaceHealth, we do our best to keep communities healthy, one mom, dad, child, brother, sister, or friend at a time. That means providing the highest level of care and expertise in places close to home.

Learn more at peacehealth.org.

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