True Friendship

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TRUE I P H S D N F RI E

Many people, making even the smallest of donations, enable Our Daily Bread Ministries to reach others with the life-changing wisdom of the Bible. We are not funded or endowed by any group or denomination.

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TRUE I P H S D N E F RI WRITERS H. Dennis Fisher ◆ Julie Ackerman Link ◆ Dave Branon ◆ David C. Egner ◆ Joseph M. Stowell EDITORS Anne Cetas, Managing Editor ◆ Becky Knapp, Associate Editor ◆ Tim Gustafson, J.R. Hudberg, Judith Markham, Editors ILLUSTRATOR Heri Kurniawan GRAPHICS LAYOUT Vania Tan/Mary Tham

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2007, 2013 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Some vector graphics taken from Freepik.com.

2015 Our Daily Bread Ministries. All rights reserved.

HELLO FRIEND! Isn’t life more beautiful when we can experience it with friends?

As relational beings, we need the companionship that friends bring into our lives, and the relationships that we build with them. Friends comfort us when we are down, share our joy when we celebrate, and help us when we are in need. They weep with us, laugh with us, and stick with us through thick and thin.

Just as we seek and treasure a good friend, we should also desire to be a good friend to others. But how can we be a true friend? How can we strengthen our friendships? Who would be our “perfect” friend? We hope you’ll be encouraged by this seven-day devotional as you discover what true friendship is all about.

Each day’s devotion contains a reading of a Bible passage, an article, and a question or two. We encourage you to take time to read and study the Bible verses, think about the author’s reflection, and mull over the questions.

Let’s value our friendships, for there is much value in them.

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AS RELATIONAL BEINGS, WE ALL NEED COMPANIONS. ISN'T IT WONDERFUL TO HAVE FRIENDS WHO CAN ACCOMPANY US THROUGH LIFE'S UPS AND DOWNS? LET'S VALUE OUR FRIENDSHIPS, FOR THERE IS MUCH VALUE IN FRIENDSHIPS.

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DAY 1

BENEFITS OF FRIENDSHIP READ: ECCLESIASTES 4:9-12 Cicero was one of the greatest thinkers of the Roman Empire.

He was a skilled orator, lawyer, politician, linguist, and writer. Still today he is quoted for his clear prose and practical wisdom.

For instance, of having friends he wrote: “Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.” He understood the double benefits of friendship along life’s journey.

Nearly a millennium earlier, King Solomon had written about the value of friends as well. In Ecclesiastes we read, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can

reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble” (4:9-10). Certainly a life without friends makes our sojourn lonely and hard to bear.

That famous Roman and that Jewish king were right: Friends are important. Friends serve as confidants, counselors, and burden-sharers. Think about your friends. Have you been neglecting those God has provided to share your joys and sorrows? If so, seek out one of your friends for fellowship this week. Remember, “two are better than one,” because a friend can double our joy and divide our grief.

—HDF

Who can you thank God for walking through life’s ups and downs with you? Do something to express your appreciation for him or her today. _______________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________

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FRIENDS ARE FLOWERS IN THE GARDEN OF LIFE.

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DAY 2

The righteous choose their friends carefully.

Proverbs 12:26 NIV

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BEST FRIENDS READ: 1 Samuel 1 8:1-4 When I signed up for a popular Internet social network, I was shocked to be greeted with the words, “You have no friends.”

Although I knew it was untrue, I still felt sad for a moment.

The idea that anyone, even an impersonal Web site, would call me friendless was upsetting.

Friends are essential for our emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.

Friends listen to our heartaches without blaming us for having problems. They defend us when we’re under attack. They are happy when we succeed and sad when we fail. They give us wise counsel to keep us from making foolish choices. They even risk making us angry for the sake of making us right. My friends have done all of this and more for me.

Perhaps the best-known friendship in the Bible is that of Jonathan and David (1 Samuel 18:1–4).

Jonathan was heir to the throne of his father Saul. But he knew that

the Lord had chosen David for that role, so he risked his own life to save his friend.

As the Bible shows us, we need to choose friends carefully (Proverbs 12:26). The very best friends are those who are friends with God and who strengthen our relationship with Him (1 Samuel 23:16).

—JAL

Why is it important to choose our friends carefully? What are the qualities of a good friend? __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________ __________________________________________

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DAY 3

Friends are seldom found; they are made.

— Wentworth

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HOW TO BE A FRIEND READ: Proverbs 27:6-17 Our daughter Melissa had many friends during her high school days. One of her best friends was Katie. After Melissa’s death in a car accident, Katie told us how they had become friends.

Katie was the new girl in school in fifth grade, having transferred from California. She felt alone and awkward and out of place—until one day early in her first year.

That’s when Melissa noticed her sitting alone on the bus.

Mell got up from her seat, sat down next to Katie, and started asking questions. They sat next to each other every day from then on and became inseparable friends for the next seven years.

Our world has so many people who need just one act of love to change their lives. These people may not think they fit in, or they may be facing turmoil that makes them feel all alone. Sometimes all we need to do is extend a hand, offer a smile, or speak a word of encouragement. As believers, we

know and experience the love of God (1 John 3:16), so we are especially able to reach out to people and share that love.

There are enough people to go around so that everyone can have friends. Let’s take the initiative to make sure no one is left out.

—JDB Whom can you reach out to in love today? ________________________________________ ________________________________________ ________________________________________ ________________________________________ _______________________________________ ________________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________ _______________________________________

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DAY 4

D O YOU CARE? READ: 1 SAMUEL 20:1-23 It’s one thing to tell a friend you care. It’s quite another to show it. When David and Jonathan made a pact of friendship (1 Samuel 18:1-4), neither of them knew to what extent Jonathan would have to go to show his care for David.

But it didn’t matter. Undaunted by danger, Jonathan courageously acted to save David’s life (20:1-23).

When we develop close friendships, we may also be called on to demonstrate by our actions that we care. The acrostic C-A-R-E can help us remember four key elements of friendship.

CHALLENGE your friend to grow spiritually. A good friend knows the importance of turning the conversation toward matters of faith.

AFFIRM your friend’s value. A phone call or a note can let your friend know how important he or she is and can keep your friendship strong.

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RESPECT the feelings and wishes of your friend. No one wants a friend with whom ideas, dreams, and concerns fall on deaf ears.

A good friend is a great sounding board.

ENCOURAGE your friend through compliments and by doing good deeds. Your friend will feel better after having been in your presence.

Do you have a friend you should care for today? —JDB How can you show your friends that you care for them? _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________

A True friend is a gift from god and one who points us back to Him.

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DAY 5

SHALLOW FRIENDLINESS READ: JOHN 15:9-17 Recently I received a phone call from a friendly-sounding person who told me she wanted to make my life easier. She called me by my first name and warmly asked how my day was going. Then she informed me that she could help me save thousands of dollars a year if I would simply refinance my home with a particular mortgage company. But once she understood that I really wasn’t interested, her friendliness evaporated.

Such insincere friendliness is often just a culturally correct attitude that some people use to impress others or to get something from them.

Contrast that self-serving attitude with the genuine friendship Jesus showed us. He said, “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13). Then He demonstrated

self-sacrificing love for us by dying on the cross to forgive our sins.

When we trust Jesus as our Savior and learn to obey Him, we experience a deep friendship that gives reality and sincerity to the friendliness we show to others.

Lord, help us to avoid the shallow friendliness that uses others to get what we want. Teach us instead to radiate the warmth of genuine Christlike friendliness to everyone we meet. —DCE

What does genuine Christlike friendliness look like?

How can we avoid shallow friendliness? ______________________________________________ _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________ _____________________________________________ ______________________________________________ _____________________________________________

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TRUE FRIENDLINESS CAN BE A MAGNET THAT DRAWS PEOPLE TO CHRIST. TRUE FRIENDSHIP

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DAY 6

CUTTING REMARKS READ: PROVERBS 12:17-22 The writer of Proverbs describes an unwise person as people who make “cutting remarks” (12:18).

Our tongues can be like a multibladed Swiss Army knife when it comes to the variety of ways that we cut and destroy each other.

Unhealthy attitudes of anger, irritation, frustration, and impatience—even disappointment, stress, guilt, and insecurity—all contribute to our damaging speech. And as we cut with our words, we wound and divide friendships and relationships.

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It’s no wonder that the infamous list of seven things that are an abomination to the Lord includes anyone who “sows discord in a family” (Proverbs 6:16-19).

How do we stay off that list? For starters, we need to watch what we say. Gossip and slander are out, and words that hurt instead of heal are not welcome. Boasting, lying, and all the rest of the ways we use words to hurt and divide need to be gone as well. In their place, words that extend love and the healing power of forgiveness,

OUR WORDS have the power to build up or tear down. mercy, and truth should rule our words and relationships. After all, where would we be if Jesus hadn’t spoken words of forgiving love and grace to us?

What words should you avoid and what should you say in order to help and heal your friends?

So, put the “knife” away and use your words to help and heal.

—JMS

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DAY 7

IMAGINARY FRIENDSHIP? READ: Romans 1:18-25 Not long ago, I heard about this billboard along the highway: “God is an imaginary friend—choose reality. It will be better for all of us.”

Obviously, the bold statement compares Christians to children whose vivid imaginations invent a make-believe companion. But is that what God is—an imaginary friend?

Actually, the evidence favors His reality. Ponder these ideas: The creation of the world shows there is a Designer behind the universe (Romans 1:18–20). The conscience indicates a Lawgiver behind each human’s sense of right and wrong (Romans 2:14–15). The creativity

The dearest friend on earth is but a mere shadow compared to Jesus.­ —Chambers

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we express in music and art reflect the same attribute that the Creator possesses (Exodus 35:31–32). Christ reveals what God is like in human form (Hebrews 1:1–4). And the communion or fellowship of the Spirit in the Christian heart manifests the reality of God (Galatians 5:22–23).

The Bible tells us there will be those who deny the reality of God (2 Peter 3:4–6). But James reminds us of His reality and how an Old Testament believer befriended Him: “‘Abraham believed God, and God counted him as righteous because of his faith.’ He was even called the friend of God” (James 2:23). Have you met the redeeming God? He gave His Son to become your real, eternal Friend (John 15:15).

—HDF Jesus welcomes you to the privilege of friendship with Him. Are you His friend? _______________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________________________________________________________

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TRUE I P H S D N F RI E

Many people, making even the smallest of donations, enable Our Daily Bread Ministries to reach others with the life-changing wisdom of the Bible. We are not funded or endowed by any group or denomination.

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23/10/15 5:19 pm