February 3, 2015 :: Transportation

FEBRUARY 03 , 2016 | OUTFRONTONLINE .COM | FREE

GET IN

Confessions of an Uber Driver

LET IT FLY

Fast Times at DIA pg.18

RIDE IT

Cyclists + Darwin Awards

TAKE A KNEE

Our Mini Wedding Theme pg.30

Brian had his HIV under control with medication. But smoking with HIV caused him to have serious health problems, including a stroke, a blood clot in his lungs and surgery on an artery in his neck. Smoking makes living with HIV much worse. You can quit.

CALL 1-800-QUIT-NOW.

#CDCTips

HIV alone didn’t cause the clogged artery in my neck.

Smoking with HIV did.

Brian, age 45, California

O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M  3

CONTENTS FEBRUARY 03, 2016 VOL39 NO21

12 06 FROM THE EDITOR 16 BIKING THE BOULEVARDS 20 CONFESSIONS OF AN UBER DRIVER 22 ON YOUR FEET, DENVER! 24 ADVENTURE TIME: THE GAY BAR CRAWL ON THE ZERO BUS

30

18

26 DENVER TRAFFIC: GROWING + SHOWING 28 A FROSTY NIGHT ABOARD THE FLATIRON FLYER 36 GUIDE TO THROWING A RAD BACHELOR(ETTE) PARTY 40 TIL DEATH DO US PART? HARDLY 46 UNDERWEAR IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT

50 4 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

SERVING THE LGBT COMMUNITY OF THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS SINCE 1976 3535 Walnut Street, Denver, Colorado 80205 PHONE 303-477-4000 • FAX 303-325-2642 WEB OutFrontOnline.com FACEBOOK /OutFrontColorado TWITTER @OutFrontCO INSTAGRAM /OutFrontColorado FOUNDER PHIL PRICE 1954-1993 ADMINISTRATION info@outfrontonline.com JERRY CUNNINGHAM Publisher J.C. MCDONALD Vice President MAGGIE PHILLIPS Operations Manager JEFF JACKSON SWAIM Chief Strategist EDITORIAL editorial@outfrontonline.com BERLIN SYLVESTRE Editor RYAN HOWE Digital Content Manager BRENT HEINZE Senior Columnist RACHEL BECHER Intern CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Paul Bindel, Stefanie Cochrane, Liam Foster, Evelyn Franco, Kelly Lemieux, Kelsey Lindsey, Amanda Moutinho, Mikey Rox, Yvonne Wright, Mike Yost ART art@outfrontonline.com TRISHA HIMMLER Art Director CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Charles Broshous, Dustin Krier, David Marcu, Ryan McGuire, Nit Underwear, Katy Veldhorst, Matthew Wiebe, Fairy Tale Photography, LetLovePhotography, FreePik.com MARKETING & SALES marketing@outfrontonline.com DUSTIN KRIER Director of Sales & Marketing JORDAN JACOBS Senior Marketing Executive TOPHER LA FLEUR Marketing Executive NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media 212-242-6863 | sales@rivendellmedia.com DISTRIBUTION

OUT FRONT’s print publication is available semi-monthly, free of charge, one copy per person. Additional copies of OUT FRONT may be purchased for $3.95 each, payable in advance at OUT FRONT offices located at 3535 Walnut Street, Denver CO, 80205. OUT FRONT is delivered only to authorized distributors.

No person may, without prior written permission of OUT FRONT, take more than one copy of OUT FRONT. Any person who takes more than one copy may be held liable for theft, including but not limited to civil damages and or criminal prosecution.

COPYRIGHT & LIMIT OF LIABILITY

Reproduction of editorial, photographic or advertising content without written consent of the publisher is strictly prohibited.

Advertisers are responsible for securing rights to any copyrighted material within their advertisements. Publisher assumes no responsibility for the claims of advertisers and reserves the right to reject any advertising. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles or advertising is not to be considered an indication of the sexual orientation or HIV status of such person or organization. Publisher assumes no responsibility for the loss or damage of materials submitted. OPINIONS EXPRESSED are not necessarily those of OUT FRONT, its staff, or advertisers.

RESERVATION OF RIGHTS

Q Publishing Group, LTD is the owner of all right, title, and interest in the OUT FRONT brand and logo. No person or entity may reproduce or use (or authorize the reproduction or use of) the OUT FRONT brand and logo in any manner other than expressly authorized by Q Publishing Group. Unauthorized use of the OUT FRONT brand and logo is strictly prohibited.

OUT FRONT is published by Q Publishing, Ltd., a Colorado corporation and is a member of: NEPA, Denver Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, and Denver Drama Critics Circle.

O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M 5

F RO M T H E E D I TO R

WHY ARE WE SO ANGRY AT EACH OTHER? I’M BERLIN SYLVESTRE, THE EDITOR HERE AT OUT FRONT MAGAZINE — NICE TO MEET YOU — AND I’M READING ALONG AT SOME OF THE COMMENTS ON OUR FACEBOOK PAGE. THE LION’S SHARE OF THEM CONCERN A FEW OPINION PIECES WE RAN IN THE JAN. 20TH I’M OFFENDED! ISSUE. So let’s address this. I know some of you are angry at a few of the contributions, but hear me out.

Quickly, before I begin, I’d like to personally invite anyone (as I have time and again) to submit your opinions and ideas to us. This has been an open invitation since I began nearly two years ago, and it’ll stay open for as long as I remain. Please take me up on the offer if you feel your voice needs to be heard! I’m a huge fan of seeing life through others’ eyes, if even for a moment.

Now, if I may ...

CONNECT WITH BERLIN Reach our editor by email at editorial@ outfrontonline.com

OUT FRONT is a magazine of LGBT perspectives. I don’t agree with the views expressed in every single piece we run, but I allow for them because this magazine’s intention (among many) is to create dialogue around issues that are important to us, that impact us in ways some didn’t even realize. It’s a display of perspective.

And yes: A few of our writers used pseudonyms (two, actually) which came with reason. Internet backlash is increasingly gnarly business and I’ve already gotten some pretty ... let’s just say “unsavory” (and quite personal) remarks about a few of them that we knew would come.

The goal was to air out some of the friction we experience in our community. There are many who feel their voices are shut out. Some might argue that they should be; some might say, “Who are we to decide that?” As a journalist and the editorial director of this publication, I tend toward the latter sentiment. I believe in the power of letting people disagree freely via the printed word. The pen, as the saying goes, is mightier than the sword, and there are many lessons to be learned by putting down our swords and listening to one another.

6 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

The platform that I’M OFFENDED! rested on was the (to some “audacious”) notion that people in our community believe different things and they’re often controversial. Further, not all of them feel safe to voice their opinions on certain matters because “I’m offended!” often rolls into vicious attacks that subsequently delegitimize that person’s lived experience. That’s it. Some people feel shut out.

So I said, “Well, then. Let’s talk about the things that people only whisper about in their living rooms. What happens after we release the pieces is up to the public and will demonstrate whether we as a community can remain civil in the face of tension, or whether we’ll dissolve into anger and reveal ourselves in another way.”

So which is taking place? That’s for you to interpret.

My aim, at any rate, was to show “how the other side lives” in their minds ... to explore why they feel the way they do about safe spaces, trigger warnings, cultural appropriation, guns, so on ...

And why should we fear friction? Why should we allow ourselves to tear into one another over opinion-based pieces in which someone shares their grievances with the community?

Why are we so angry at each other?

We’re not a homogeneous group, this community — and that’s ok. What I personally find unsettling (and this is my opinion, of course) is the fact that we lash out like we do.

When we hear something that doesn’t immediately settle on our ears in a way that we’d prefer, we pursue cannibalism over camaraderie; accusation over education; intolerance over understanding.

It seems as though some in our community aim to inflict pain upon a speaker who disagrees with us, rather than showing them (through opinions of our own) the possible errors of their ways,

WE’VE MOVED!

CAN’T FIND US AT THE LOCAL STORE? DON’T WANT TO JUST READ US ONLINE? CHECK OUT OUR UPDATED DISTRIBUTION MAP. CONSTANTLY UPDATING 365 DAYS A YEAR.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM/DISTRIBUTION

HERE ARE SOME PLACES WE DISTRIBUTE TO: GOOD CHEMISTRY

330 E COLFAX AVE | DENVER, CO

M UPTOWN

(FORMERLY HAMBURGER MARY’S)

TRACKS

700 E 17TH AVE | DENVER, CO

SIE FILMCENTER

2132 14TH ST | BOULDER, CO

GREATER ENGLEWOOD CHAMBER

900 E COLFAX AVE | DENVER, CO

3500 WALNUT ST | DENVER, CO 2510 E COLFAX AVE | DENVER, CO

3501 S BROADWAY 2ND FLOOR | ENGLEWOOD, CO

OUT BOULDER

CHARLIE'S DENVER

CAPITOL HILL UNITED NEIGHBORHOODS

1290 WILLIAMS ST | DENVER, CO

WALGREENS 12051 E MISSISSIPPI AVE | AURORA, CO

LOWRY LIQUORS

200 QUEBEC ST | DENVER, CO

PRESS COFFEE COMPANY

7150 W ALASKA DR | LAKEWOOD, CO

PLEASURES

3250 W ALAMEDA AVE | DENVER, CO

MOUNTAIN READING SERVICE 1687 W 820 N | PROVO, UT

RAINBOW RESOURCE CENTER

1000 E UNIVERSITY AVE | 128 KNIGHT HALL | LARAMIE, WY

CLUB Q

3430 N ACADEMY BLVD | COLORADO SPRINGS, CO

NORTHERN COLORADO AIDS PROJECT 400 REMINGTON ST, #100 | FORT COLLINS, CO

DON’T WANT TO LEAVE THE HOUSE? SUBSCRIBE FOR ONLY $19.97/YEAR (24 ISSUES; US ONLY) O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M 7

F RO M T H E E D I TO R CO N T.

the potential fallacies in their logic. We go on witch-hunts using the authors’ bylines and look for ways to smear the writer, to hurt them.

I hope you’ll forgive me that I must acknowledge

And what if these actual human beings are writing from trauma of their own that they’ve been unable to speak on because they’ve been told that their pain isn’t as distressing as others’? Perhaps a silent misery that’s manifested itself as something a reader finds ugly and offensive ... and after they’ve been given the chance to say, “Here’s what hurts me,” we show our solidarity by barbing our words and offering no help.

disagreement that led to (essentially), “I hadn’t

quickly that at least one thread (so far) on the cultural appropriation column resulted in a civil thought of that. Thanks!” That was always my goal in opening these floodgates; that we’d talk.

Not stomp on each others’ hearts. Talk.

So here’s your mic: Berlin@OutFrontOnline.com (And remember what I said about defaming, yeah?

Let’s try to stop being so cruel to each other.)

Cheers from RiNo,

How can we ever educate one another in an echo chamber?

Please think about that.

Again, I invite anyone to submit to OUT FRONT. I don’t believe in censoring opinions UNLESS ... unless unless unless ... the aim is to defame. There’s no use in that. (Except lawsuits; defamation is great for that, come to think.)

FROM THE INBOX BERLIN, Yeah, Wesley Smith is paranoid. I’m astounded at the ridiculousness and Francophobia he displays.

His factual omissions don’t speak well of him either. According to the Committee to Protect Journalists, France doesn’t even rank in the top 20 of journalist fatalities since they have been keeping records (1992). Their records show a total of ten French journalist fatalities in the past 23 years.

Unfortunately, eight of those ten were killed in the Charlie Hebdo attacks last January, the cause for its second-place rating in 2015. Yes, last year was a bad year for journalists in France, but clearly 2015 was an aberration.

But gun owners overall seem to be paranoid, at least from my personal experience. Such sad behavior he exhibits, repeated in the millions by his fellow American gun owners, shows how poor in spirit these people are.

Mark Thompson.

The column in reference is Guns in America: You Can’t Unring the Bell, and can be found in the Jan. 20 issue of OUT FRONT. 8 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

10 out of 10 optimists believe in themselves.

The difference between impossible and possible often starts with a person saying, “I think I can.” At U.S. Bank, we think you can too. And with our competitive products and services, we’re here to help in every way we can.

PERSONAL

|

BUSINESS

|

W E A LT H M A N A G E M E N T

O U T F R O N T O N L I N E . C O M 9

OUT FRONT’s good buddies over at One Colorado requested some space to talk about their upcoming year, and we’re always grateful for these team-ups. Without further ado, their latest dispatch.

LGBT COLORADANS & THE 2016 COLORADO LEGISLATURE ONE COLORADO, THE STATE’S LEADING ADVOCACY ORGANIZATION FOR LGBT COLORADANS and their families, has an ambitious 2016 legislative agenda that is based in this simple belief: LGBT Coloradans deserve the same chance as everyone else to earn a living, be safe in their communities, pursue health and happiness, and take care of the ones they love. Below are a few of the things we will be working on at the State Capitol this year.

THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE MODERNIZATION ACT Transgender people whose birth certificates reflect their sex at birth — and not their current gender — risk being denied housing, employment opportunities, and the right to vote because of this discrepancy. We will once again attempt to bring our laws in line with federal policies so that it is easier for transgender Coloradans to update the gender on their birth certificate.

BAN CONVERSION THERAPY FOR MINORS It is past time to ban the dangerous and discredited practice of conversion therapy so that no more young people are forced into trying to change their sexual orientation or gender identity. Conversion therapy is based on the false claim that being lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender is a mental illness that needs to be cured. We still have work to do to make sure every young person in Colorado lives in a community where they feel safe, welcome, and empowered to make change. We should support LGBT youth in our state — not try to change them.

ALIGN COLORADO’S MARRIAGE AND CIVIL UNIONS LAWS Since the Supreme Court decided that the freedom to marry is a precious, fundamental right that belongs to all, some of our state’s civil unions laws diverge with that decision. We will be supporting a bill to make sure our laws reflect the new reality in Colorado and the US. MAKE SURE EVERYONE IS TREATED EQUALLY UNDER THE LAW We’re working with the Colorado Immigrant Rights Coalition to improve and maintain protections, accountability, and community trust between public-safety agencies

SHELBY & ROXY THE DYNAMIC DUO

Meet Shelby & Roxy, two adorable dogs that prove things get better with age!

These sweeties would love to find a home where they can spend time relaxing with their family. They’ve lived with dogs and children in the past. Come meet them!

10 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

HERC THE FRIENDLY GIANT Herc is a big boy with lots of love to give! He enjoys playing fetch and going for walks. He likes treats and already knows basic commands. If you’re looking for a playful, happy dog come meet Herc soon!

and immigrant communities, as well as affirm Constitutional protections for all who call Colorado home.

PROTECT OUR VICTORIES Opponents of equality show no signs of slowing down their efforts to turn back the clock and roll back the LGBT community’s hard-won victories. We will work to defeat any and all bills that allow individuals and businesses to claim their religion gives them permission to ignore the law, stop all attempts to stigmatize and attack transgender Coloradans and their families, and fight any other bills that will hurt LGBT Coloradans.

Marriage was never meant to be the end of the road for LGBT equality. Even though our state is ahead of the curve in some ways, we still have a long way to go until we achieve equality for all.

One Colorado will continue to work with LGBT Coloradans, their families, and our allies to move our state forward until everyone can feel comfortable living openly and honestly in communities all across Colorado — from the Eastern Plains to the Western Slope.

If you’re interested in helping these bills pass in 2016, we will be hosting our annual LGBT Lobby Day on February 29th. You’ll have an opportunity to tell your elected officials, in person, why these issues matter to you. You can get more information and sign up at bit. ly/2016LobbyDay.

on s Pets Teleth for Homeles Have a Heart 16 February 11, 20 a brand-new re introducing e’ es: w ol This year, ur d favorit uring all yo ng hi uc to d telethon feat an optable pets whose lives adorable, ad s al im an s meles ur stories of ho cause of yo changed be during y da l have been al S atch 9NEW s. generosity. W and program e newscasts rit e. vo or fa m r ur fo yo g ock@ddfl.or Contact sspr ebec St Qu S. 80 20 | DDFL.org 2 77 (303) 751-5

WEIGHING YOUR OPTIONS: TAKING YOUR PARTNER’S LAST NAME

LEGAL DIRECTORY

Sheila P. Carrigan IF I ENTER INTO A CIVIL UNION AND I WANT TO CHANGE MY LAST NAME TO MY SPOUSE’S LAST NAME, HOW DO I DO THAT? After your civil union license has been recorded at your local county clerk and recorder’s office, obtain a few certified copies of your union license. Take a certified copy to the driver’s license bureau to obtain a license in your new name and to the local social security office to obtain a new social security card. Do not forget you will need to change your name with your banks, credit cards, utility bills and all other such entities. You will also need to change your passport. If you are honeymooning immediately after the nuptials you may wish to get your tickets in your pre-ceremony name to be sure your travel plans are not delayed.

WHAT IF I WANT TO CHANGE MY CHILDREN’S LAST NAME? If you already have children you will need to go through a name change process and have birth certificates reissued. If you have children after your civil union you can name your partner as the child’s second parent and give the child

either name or a hyphenated last name. If your child does not have a second parent now your partner can adopt via a step-parent adoption after the ceremony.

WHAT IF I WANT TO KEEP MY LAST NAME? OR HYPHENATE IT? If you want to keep your name you don’t need to do anything. Hyphenating it is the same process as changing it.

WHAT ELSE SHOULD I KNOW BEFORE ENTERING INTO A CIVIL UNION AND HOW CAN A LAWYER HELP MY FAMILY PREPARE? You may want to consider a consultation with a family law or estate planning attorney before you enter the civil union, especially if you have significant assets or either of you have children from previous relationships. Individuals considering civil union should be aware under the current law, many common provisions that apply to spouses will not apply to parties in a civil union if the unions later dissolve. For example, dividing retirement and other benefits at the time of divorce cannot be accomplished under federal laws.

BLOCH & CHAPLEAU, LLC

303-331-1700 • BlochChapleau.com 1725 Gaylord St • Denver, CO

Family Law • Civil Union Dissolutions Pre-Union Agreements • Auto Accidents

LAW OFFICE OF BYRON K. HAMMOND, LLC

303-501-1812 • BKH-Law.com

3900 E. Mexico Ave • Denver, CO Wills • Trusts • Estate Planning Probate • Elder Law

THE O’CONNELL LAW FIRM, PC 303-759-4000 • OConnellLegal.com

710 13th St, Ste 300 • Evergreen, CO Personal Injury • Estate Planning Wills • Trusts • Marijuana Business

TITUS PETERSON, AAL 303-260-6412

600 17th St, Ste 2800 South • Denver, CO Personal Injury • Divorce • Criminal Law Marijuana Business

The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.

outfrontonline.com/legal-directory | To advertise here, please call 303-477-4000.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 11

N EWS

WA GROUP INVOKES CHILDSAFETY POLEMIC, SAFE-SPACE IDEOLOGY IN GENDER-NEUTRAL BATHROOM PROTESTS Berlin Sylvestre PAULINE WILL ADMIT SHE LIVES IN A BUBBLE. “I know one transgender person,” she offers without solicitation — but she knows a threat when she sees one, which is why she, along with other members of Keep Locker Rooms Safe (KLRS), are calling for the repeal of Washington’s new gender-neutral bathroom law.

Barely a month old — but rumbling with legal showdown potential — 162-32-060 of the Washington Administrative Code allows the use of restrooms, locker rooms, dressing rooms, and homeless and emergency shelters to correspond with the users’ gender expressions and gender identities. Additionally, the code states that users can’t be asked to use another facility based upon their gender expression or identity, nor shall they be punished for using the facilities based solely on those grounds.

Pauline, last name withheld, says the new legislation came about via “underhanded” tactics between the Kitsap and Pierce County YMCAs and Washington’s Human Rights Commission.

“They had four — in quotes — ‘public meetings’ about it,” she tells me, adding that she’s obtained documentation that the most-attended meeting saw only 12 participants. “One meeting was held at the Oasis [Youth] Center, which is an LGBT place where youth can go and feel welcome and loved. I have no problem with that, but I do have a problem with the Human Rights Commission’s ‘public meetings’ [held at a place] where a lot of people wouldn’t feel comfortable coming.”

12 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

A woman who preferred to go by simply Mo took my call down at the state’s Legislative Information Center and confirmed that “unless you follow an issue closely, you’re probably not aware of the public meetings about it.”

So Pauline’s got a point.

“The YMCA in Kitsap and Pierce County were complicit with the Human Rights Commission,” she says. “The CEO, Bob Ecklund, and his administrative assistant, Michelle LaRue, worked hand in glove with the LGBT [community] and the Human Rights Commission to get this into place — and they did it behind everybody’s back. They didn’t go through their board of directors, they just … did it.”

A call to the state’s Human Rights Commission (at the time of publication) had not been returned.

She says the YMCA put the new rules into place before it actually became law in Washington, and insists members weren’t informed of the change. “The only way we found out was that there was a man in the women’s restroom, and a lifeguard saw him, and it turns out, he is a she and it was like, ‘Ok, you can’t be in here,’ and he said, ‘Oh, yes I can; the rules have changed.’ [The lifeguard] went to her supervisor and [found out] ‘Yeah, this is ok.’”

A pause. “They didn’t tell anybody,” she reiterates, driving the point further. “If you, Berlin, saw a man in there and felt threatened and you questioned his gender identity and talked

to an employee, you could be fined for violating his civil rights and you could be prosecuted. Frankly, the YMCA should have no business writing law — it’s not their place. ” I gave a ring to Michelle LaRue, actually the senior vice president of YMCA of Pierce and Kitsap Counties, but the call went to voicemail. (I’ll update if she rings back.)

Back to Pauline. It’s harder to tell what aggravates her more — whether it’s the “under the table” insertion of the new code (her words; not mine), or whether it’s the fact that “bathrooms are now unsafe.”

“I don’t feel threatened by the transgender community, and 99 percent of the people on KLRS aren’t offended, threatened, or worried that the transgender community is going to pose harm on us,” she says. “That’s not what this is about.” “’Keep Locker Rooms Safe’ connotates that you’re in harm’s way,” I tell her.

“We are — but not from the transgender community.” She invokes a concept many LGBTs commonly refer to as “safe spaces,” in which potentially upsetting ideas or scenarios are barred from entry. “I have three very close friends who are survivors of sexual exploitation,” she explains. “They have PTSD just thinking about being confronted with male genitalia in a locker room; they literally come unglued and have to go to counseling. That’s why we’re using the term safe spaces — Keep Lockers Rooms Safe.”

So now we’re back to the “man in the dressing room.” I ask her to please correct me if I’m wrong, but it sounds to me like “if you’re going into the women’s bathroom, you need to look like a woman; you need to be a ‘passable’ woman, as it’s been called.”

She pauses. “In my personal opinion, yes. If they are transgender and they feel comfortable walking into the locker room, and they’re dressed like a woman, and they have a completed surgery, and they’re not going to expose themselves to my daughters or me, I have no problem with that. I don’t need to know what your genitals look like, frankly.”

“And that would clear it up: You need to be far enough along in your transition that you don’t present at all as male,” I reiterate.

“Yes,” she says, adding quickly that she doesn’t speak on behalf of everyone in the Facebook group. “I wouldn’t have a problem with a woman walking into a restroom. If you’re questionable at all, you probably wouldn’t be comfortable coming in there anyway.”

She leans in: “The deal is, this law doesn’t say that you have to be in transition — there’s no verification process at all. This law does not protect transgender people; it says anybody at any time can go into the locker room. That’s the misunderstanding — I’m not just talking about transgenders; I’m talking about anybody who wants to go in there and exploit women and children,” she says. “There’s article after article after article of men pretending to be women already.”

She directs me to a podcast in which conservative talk-radio host Todd Herman discusses the group’s intentions with a member of KLRS. “[Herman] has documentation of 20 cases

ALL DAY HAPPY HOUR Happy hour from open to close, with karaoke at 9pm

T U E S D A Y S

Hosted by Jackie Summers & Felony Misdemeanor Balls drop at 9pm • Free to play!

SPONSORED BY

WEDNESDAYS @9PM

Dolls with Balls!

Hosted by Alexandra Winters & Harley Quinn.

SVEDKA presents

T H U R S D A Y S

TRIVIA STARTS @ 8PM

F R I D A Y S

THE HOTTEST QUEENS IN Reservations begin at 9pm, show at 10pm DENVER!

EVERY SATURDAY @ 9PM

(303) 832-1333 M-UPTOWN.COM 700 E. 17TH AVE. DENVER OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 13

— and there’s more, Google search it — of men going into women’s restrooms with upskirt cameras, of [men] trying to rape women. This has already happened. So now, we’re taking away the barriers — they don’t even have to dress up as a woman; all they have to do is say, ‘I feel like a woman,’ and they can go in there.”

I ask her why the trans community, seemingly conflated with sexual predators here, should be punished for the crimes of others.

“They’re not being punished,” she insists. “Reasonable accommodation can be made that’s not discriminatory. In the YMCA in Kitsap and Pierce County, all of them have private rooms with a toilet, a shower, sink, and a changing area. When I personally spoke to Michelle LaRue, they had no incident of any transgender individual wanting this law.”

(Again, still waiting on LaRue’s call.)

Pauline says of her sole transgender friend: “She chose to use the family locker room because she wasn’t comfortable in the women’s locker room because she’s not fully transitioned. Her position was, ‘Why should I risk being ridiculed?’ The children’s locker room is open to the women’s locker room. She said, ‘Why should I risk having a young girl see me?

It’s embarrassing to her, it’s embarrassing to me, and what if she has questions to ask her parents that maybe she’s not ready to handle right now?”

“So that’s really, honestly what it boils down to — somebody’s genitalia,” I say aloud to no contradiction. I try this: “I’m a lesbian, and even though I’m attracted to women, I don’t look at other women in the locker room. Sexuality, genitalia, all that’s the furthest thing from my mind. I’m there to change out of my dirty gym clothes, shower, and get the hell out.”

“Exactly,” she agrees. “I totally hear that and I agree with you that 99 percent of transgender people are extremely circumspect, but to have this law forced down upon us opens up a can of worms that never should have been opened.”

“They have the right to use the one that their genitalia corresponds to,” Pauline says flatly.

“This is not about feelings; this is not about how you feel.”

She drags the word out in the same way my grandfather, a grizzled vet, used to when he referred to hippies.

“This is about facts.”

I insist that in my experience, trans people — as frequent victims of violence and misinterpreted intentions — tend toward caution rather than exhibition in public facilities. She thinks it makes sense, and I can’t help but wonder where we’re ever going to get. Of course, we could devolve into more … spirited debate, but we’d only arrive at the same conclusion: We disagree on this issue and find one another ill-informed.

It happens. Less civilly by the day, it seems, but it happens.

“I believe that everybody should have the same rights, but at the same point, .3 percent of the population identifies as transgender — that’s less than one percent of the population.

So now we have 99.7 percent of the population whose right to privacy is being violated.”

I admit that I can’t reconcile a conversation about rights from this angle, not when someone’s being denied them in the form of a bathroom ban.

“They have the right to use the one that their genitalia corresponds to,” she says flatly. “This is not about feelings; this is not about how you feel.” She drags the word out in the same way my grandfather, a grizzled vet, used to when he referred to hippies. “This is about facts.”

14 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

Aha. We’ve arrived.

“If it were put to a vote and a majority of the people said, ‘I don’t care,’ would Keep Locker Rooms Safe exist?” The longest pause we’ve had so far sits between us.

“That’s a good question,” she says finally. “ I don’t know.”

I tell her I can give her time to think about it, that I won’t release the story if she wants to fully satisfy that inquiry, but she declines and thinks aloud instead.

“I don’t know that I’ll have an answer. I’d just have to rethink: If Washington took a vote on an initiative, and the citizens of the state of Washington said, ‘Yeah, this law is ok’ …”

She continues a few more lines of thought and arrives here: “If we had an open discussion and [a more public] debate, and the citizens and legislature passed this, I would not be fighting it.”

Again, she speaks for herself and not for the others in the group.

“What’s the perfect solution, Pauline?” I ask, and she describes her church bathroom: single-occupancy and gender-neutral.

She says Starbucks have similar setups, something that mothers with kids, disabled individuals, and transgender people can use.

“In an ideal world, that would be the way to go,” she tells me, clearly wrapping things up. “I would like to see everyone’s privacy rights being respected. If that means we have to have a third option for a bathroom, we have a third option for a bathroom.”

We thank one another for being civil, and remark on the rarity of these instances. Here we are, two people who stand on different sides of the bathroom-bill divide, disagreeing respectfully. When asked if there was anything she’d like the world to know before we go, she says: “I just want to emphasize that this is not against transgender individuals, that’s not what this is about. It’s about everybody being safe and respected.”

(We could go on forever.)

LILY TOMLIN

Saturday • April 23 Paramount Theater

AP

RIL 2 PM ND 2016 @ 8

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM/ANNIVERSARYPROM OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 15

Mike Yost

BIKING THE BOULEVARDS

We all have our horror stories, especially if you’ve ever ridden the Fifteen (East Colfax) or the Zero (South Broadway).

God help you if you ride those bus lines late at night ... on a weekend … on a holiday weekend.

There are a few guidelines to make your public transportation experience more palpable. Headphones are a must, preferably with a furious metal band like Dying Fetus exploding out of your earbuds. And bring a book, preferably a collection of H.P. Lovecraft stories so you can summon Cthulhu if needed.

And if you hear someone on the bus talking (or screaming) to himself, do not make eye contact. I’m not saying he’ll dismember you, but I guarantee whatever happens next, it won’t be boring.

As an alternative to public transportation, I like to bike. It’s good exercise. It’s green.

It’s free. I don’t, however, recommend reading Lovecraft while biking — unless you want to win a Darwin award as a red smear along the asphalt.

16 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

I’m not alone in using this substitute.

In March of 2015, the Downtown Denver Partnership announced that “commuting by bike into Downtown Denver has increased by 43 percent in the past year.” And Denver’s public bike-sharing network now consists of 87 bike stations with 700 bikes. This growth has fostered conflict between drivers and bikers alike. So, as someone who does both (I’m versatile), here are a few suggestions to make all our commuting experiences more palpable.

TO BIKERS: DON’T BE A DOUCHENOZZLE As a biker, I cringe when I see someone biking down 13th or 14th Street, basically a rolling traffic hazard. Those who traverse these one-way gauntlets in and out of downtown Denver know there’s hardly enough room for vehicles, let alone bikes. Every other parked car along these streets has a stub where the side-view mirror once was.

It’s more frustrating knowing that both 12th and 16th Street are designated bike paths, parts of which have bike lanes.

TO DRIVERS: WE’RE NOT ALL DOUCHENOZZLES I’ve seen the meme: A picture of a biker

with the sardonic text arguing bikers want to be treated as traffic, but don’t follow traffic laws. First, I’ve never met a driver who has never broken a traffic law (#doublestandards). Second, there are idiot bikers just like there are idiot drivers.

I once got stuck in my truck at a busy intersection (on my way to work) as a large group of bikers deliberately ran the red light, backing up the commuter traffic for blocks.

As a biker, I’d like to say to other bikers who feel so entitled to do this: Go screw yourself. I mean it. Take the sprocket assembly and insert it where the sun don’t shine, or read while you bike and earn yourself a Darwin award. (Ok, maybe my last statement was a bit harsh, but moronic bikers give us conscientious bikers a bad name, and it blows chunks.)

TO EVERYONE: LOSE THE SPANDEX I shouldn’t have to explain myself here.

Spandex is a product of evil, of Sauron himself. If you wear Spandex, you’re a minion of Sauron, whether you’re biking, driving, or jogging around Cheesman Park with your Dandie Dinmont Terrier.

Cast those accursed clothes into Mount Doom and spare us all.

PHOTO CREDIT: DAVID MARCU

LET’S FACE IT: SOMETIMES TAKING PUBLIC transportation blows chunks. And I use that analogy on purpose, as I’ve smelled vomit (among other bodily fluids) on the bus before.

Presentations by top marketing minds in three categories: LOCAL/REGIONAL, NATIONAL, AND NON-PROFIT. With a lunch + networking hour included, learn to EFFECTIVELY CONNECT TO THE LGBT MARKETPLACE. KEYNOTE SPEAKER

JOHN ROBERTS Partner + Portfolio Manager, Denver Investments

ENDNOTE SPEAKER

JERRY CUNNINGHAM President, National Equality Publisher's Assn.

Publisher, OUT FRONT

SAVE THE DATE FEBRUARY 11, 2016 @ 11AM AT THE SIE FILMCENTER RSVP OUTFRONTONLINE.COM/SUMMIT

SPONSORS

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 17

Evelyn Franco

“I love getting away!”*

PEOPLE, PLEASE STOP MAKING TRAVEL SUCK

The part I love about catapulting over state lines is finally getting to my hotel.

The part that sucks? Everything else. So let’s examine some of the dos and don’ts that would make DIA (or any airport, really) a trillion times better.

AN OPEN LETTER TO ABLE-BODIED N00BS AND INCONSIDERATE PEOPLE AT DIA

KEEP YOUR LUGGAGE TIGHT Your wheeled luggage is such a luxury, right? Grab the telescopic handle, point your feet, and go! The part you should leave out, though, is the one where you let it roll all over the place three feet behind you, creating an invisible bubble of “All this space is mine!” in a sea of people who’d like to get to their gate without a selfish, wily human barricade.

KEEP WALKING ON THE ACCELERATED WALKWAYS Not only are you missing out on sudden warp speed, you’re defeating the purpose of those things. They’re not an “oh, this is nice” moment to rest your feet while floating alongside people who are walking faster than you’re moving; they’re a clever way to accelerate and organize foot-traffic. If there’s a reason you suddenly can’t continue walking the moment you hit those horizontal escalators, move to the right and let people who can pass you!

HAVE YOUR ID + BOARDING PASS READY AT THE TSA PRESCREEN “Next,” calls the TSA agent seated at a podium, hand outstretched for the two items she needs from you. And there you are, trying to steady your luggage as you rifle through your bag for them, people in line behind you wanting to tackle you like a Bronco on Brady. Before you even enter the TSA labyrinth, step to the side and get those items at the ready. Every single second the line is held up, an angel loses its wings.

MOVE ON DOWN TO PUT YOUR SHOES + JEWELRY BACK ON All that grumbling about having to “undress” and get scanned is so 2002.

Once you’ve got your personal items regathered, just move up a couple feet to those neat little benches that allow you to resituate — that’s what they’re there for. When you create a log-jam at the end of the TSA scanners, the terrorists win.

GET OUT OF THE MAIN WALKWAYS TO SCAN THE SHOPS Ooh, magazines! Ooh, a McDonald’s! Ooh, Broncos windpants! Yes: The airport is a virtual Hall of Wonders, but if you’re into the shopping game, don’t stop in the deadmiddle of the thoroughfare to get your gander on. Politely move toward the side or stand closer to the information booths to plan your next bout of consumer fury.

DON’T WEAR PERFUME OR COLOGNE It seems like every time I shimmy into a seat and dislocate my shoulders looking for the seatbelts, I’m doing so in yet another cloud of eau-de-chemical warfare. I understand that it might be fun to crack a bottle of Polo Sport on the side of your bathroom counter like a beer bottle in a barfight, then dump the contents down your neck and chest, but save that for the hotel, dudebruh. We’re in a tighter space than that new-on-thescene Tinder twink you’ve been after, so chill on the olfactory assault.

SO LET’S TAKE OUR OWN ADVICE + TIGHTEN UP THIS COLUMN. If I see you put your overhead luggage in sideways, you’re gonna need security.

The middle seat gets both armrests.

Cough/sneeze into your sleeve.

If your aisle-mate isn’t asking questions back, they’re just being polite. Shhhh.

Don’t open that curry you brought from home and eat it on the plane. Dude, for real?

So let’s make DIA less of an OMG. You do your part, my friend, and I’ll do mine. If you’ve got any to add, find OUT FRONT Colorado on Facebook and tell the people what’s up.

*From travelers who have absolutely no courtesy or sense of personal dimensions, when getting on and off trains, buses, rail lines, and planes.

18 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

PHOTO CREDIT: KATY VELDHORST

“I LOVE GETTING AWAY!” PEOPLE WITH A few extra coins usually say. And while I have to agree — though I have fewer than a few extra coins — the sentiment comes with a footnote in my case.

PROTECT YOUR HUM A N RIG HTS

NOW AND IN THE FUTURE Over 50% of adult Americans don’t have a will or trust.

Who will get your assets? Home? Photos?

PERSONAL INJURY Motor Vehicle Accidents Falls & Dangerous Conditions Wrongful Death (Contingency fee basis)

ESTATE PLANNING Wills Trusts Power of Attorney Advance Medical Directives

PROUDLY SERVING COLORADO'S LGBT COMMUNITY Consultations in person, by phone or over Skype

MARIJUANA BUSINESS Compliance Contracts Business Formation

REPRESENTING PEOPLE ALL OVER COLORADO

303-759-4000 OConnellLegal.com

02/10

National Achievers Congress,

02/11 02/12 02/14 03/08 03/09 03/19

Adam Sandler & Friends Bill Burr Ladies Night Out!!! feat. Jodeci Yanni David Archuleta Lewis Black

feat. Tony Robbins

02/13-21

Colorado Home & Garden Show 03/16-20 Denver Auto Show 02/19 Los Temerarios 06/17 Denver Comic Con

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 19

LET ME TAKE YOU FOR A RIDE. Several nights a week I work for Uber and, as a gay man, I have some pretty good stories.

Halloween weekend last year served up a couple juicy tidbits. I roll up to this houseparty and wait patiently for Scott to come out. I send my usual text that I’ve arrived and then proceed to scope out the area like Mrs. Kravitz. It’s 1am and people are leaving. A guy walks out with a girl tagging along behind. Aww, it’s a cowboy and a squaw. He’s relatively attractive in a sort of “dirty hipster” kind of way and she’s … well, arm candy.

They get in and, as usual, haven’t entered their destination. “Where are you guys going?” I ask. “Home,” she tells me. The vodka on her breath was enough to make me fail a breathalyzer. “Clay Street,” he rumbles. It’s about a 10-minute drive.

Liam Foster

CONFESSIONS FROM AN UBER DRIVER WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT

We get under way and they waste no time with small talk. They’re making out as we zoom up Speer and then I hear it: the unmistakable ‘ting’ of a belt buckle.

Now I’m not a prude, but I drive a Fit. There’s no option to roll up the glass partition. Hell, the backseat is close enough to get a reach around. So I turn up the music and glance at the time. Eight minutes to go. But now I wanna know just how far this adventure is going back there. I glance at the rearview mirror and his head is thrown back. Okay, curiosity is killing me. Quick glance. Damn, Gina!

Now I have to hope that either she doesn’t finish or she swallows. I am not cleaning that off my leather seats. I look

20 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

in the rearview mirror. He’s staring back at me with a big ol’ shit-eating grin on his face.

Eyes on the road, Liam. I turn onto Clay and I can hear the rustling in the back. I stop and announce we’re here. “Have a good night. Get some sleep.”

He turns to look back at me in the car. “Oh we won’t be getting any sleep tonight,” he drawls. Cool, bro.

Now it’s Halloween night. It’s stupid busy. Hundreds of you crazy revelers walking around LoDo. Ping! My next ride, and I’m in no way prepared for what’s about to happen. I pull over to the side of the street and start waiting for Luke.

A couple minutes go by so I decide to call him. We talk back and forth as I describe where I am. Finally, I get out of the car and look for him.

Here comes big, blonde, 6’2 Captain America. I want to gape at him, but here comes his girlfriend in tow. He’s got blood running down from his nose and he’s trying to wipe it off. She gets in the backseat and he sits up front. Well this is strange. Most couples sit in back together.

He’s still bleeding so I excuse myself and open the glove box in front of him and fish out some napkins. He says, “Thank you.” He’d entered the address so I didn’t have to worry about taking directions. “So how does the other guy look?” I ask. “He’ll have a black eye.” “So what happened?” “He grabbed my girl’s ass.” “Oh. Do you need another napkin?” And then he looks at me and says, “You’re such a fag.” Dead silence. His girlfriend exclaims, “Luke, you can’t say things like that!” But pretty much nothing offends

me. I just smile and explain that it’s alright. I know he’s drunk and feeling macho. He tells me he’s a Marine and then out of nowhere he say, “My dick is only six inches.”

I don’t know how to respond to that except in my head I’m like, “Well, whip the f*cker out and lemme see.” Damn girlfriend is in the backseat, though. We arrive at his house and they both get out.

He turns around and comes back in the car. He looks at me and smiles. “Gimme a hug, dude.” I’m shocked but lean in to hug it out. “You’re cool, man. Thanks for getting us home.”

have a beer sometime,” he says. I smile and give my phone number. He puts it into his phone, smiles, and wishes me a Merry Christmas.

“G’night, buddy” is all I can manage to say.

“I can, just let me know what your addy is,” I dictate.

There’s a rumor that Uber drivers sleep with their riders.

Just to make it clear, we do — and the opportunities happen often. One such occasion happened over the holidays.

“Jasmine Street off 6th,” she reads back.

I was checking Facebook while waiting for Chris to show up. There’s a tap on my window and I look up. It’s this really cute guy that I’ve seen out for years, but never had the nerve to talk to. He gets in and asks me to take him to his car. So we’re toodling along and making small talk. It’s becoming difficult not to stare into the rearview mirror.

“Have we met before?” he asks.

“We haven’t, but we’ve seen each other at social occasions.”

“Oh,” he replies. He’s been giving directions from the backseat, which I don’t normally allow passengers to do. “It’s the next left,” he says.

I turn and he indicates that it’s the Lexus on the right. I stop next to the car and turn to say goodnight. “We should

A few minutes later and I’m on my way to the airport with a couple heading home for the holidays. I get a text from Chris. “Hi. It was nice to meet you. I left my coffee cup in your car. Can you maybe drop it off?” I start to laugh and the wife asks what’s so funny. I ask them if they see the cup back there and sure enough, it’s there. I don’t want to text and drive so I ask her if she can type a reply for me.

“Ok. I can drop it off when I get back from the airport,” I have her type and get back an: “Awesome! Thank you so much!”

A few minutes later, another text. “Would you want to have a glass of champagne?” Now it dawns on me: He left the cup on purpose. I ask the wife to indulge me one more time.

(They’re both cracking up.)

“I’d love to,” she replies for me.

As I’m dropping the couple off they tease me about the cup and wish me luck.

Thirty minutes later, I’m on his doorstep with the coffee cup in hand. He opens the door and he’s standing there in boxers and socks. “Did you really forget this in my car?”

“Of course I did,” he smiles.

“You’re here now, aren’t you?”

Well, then. Merry Christmas, indeed.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 21

Paul Bindel

ON YOUR FEET, DENVER!

IN THE MULTIMODAL STREAM OF BIKE commutes, lightrails, bus routes, taxi rides, ski runs, and lines of traffic that surge around Denver every day, it’s easy to forget that the most basic form of transportation, which supports all others, is our feet. Denver transit is booming, and walking activists, city planners, and community members are all trying to solve the problem of how to get people from their homes to new hubs of transportation.

“We are finding that people don’t ride [public transit] as much as we hoped because they can’t access it,” says local walking advocate Gosia Kung.

“Sidewalks have not been funded in the last 50 or 60 years.”

Denver’s pedestrian infrastructure runs the gamut: Cherry Creek has heated sidewalks, and Highlands, Five Points, and historic neighborhoods have wide flagstone. Sadly, neighborhoods like Westwood and Athmar have few sidewalks and sometimes less than 18 inches of pavement for kids to take on their way to school.

The reason some neighborhoods have strong sidewalks, Kung explains, is because they were developed in tandem with streetcars. Most residents of the time walked to the trolly to get to work.

During the 60s, 70s, and 80s, however, Denver’s outer neighborhoods sprung up with the premise that most residents would have cars.

To address this uneven infrastructure, Denver City Council has formed a sidewalk working group led by Councilman Paul Kashmann that saw its first convening on January 27. If advocates like Kung are successful, the Council and eventually the mayor will both move to support public funding of sidewalks. “It’s not realistic for individual property owners to build and

22 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

24

99 $ WALK-IN

maintain their own sidewalks,” Kung says.

SPECIAL

If you want to get involved with walking advocacy or explore the environment in town, you can take a walk, sign a petition, or even make a walkability inventory of your neighborhood.

Until better sidewalks appear for everyone in Denver, here are walking advocates’ favorite places best accessed by foot:

BECAUSE EVERYONE DESERVES A MASTERFUL HAIRCUT ( F I R S T - T I M E C L I E N T S O N L Y )

“[T]he small ‘goat trail’ that takes you through tall grasses around the fence just south of W 27th St and north of Speer [could be] a great fireworks spot. It overlooks downtown Denver and is (for now) a grassy hill that rests between the chaos of Speer Blvd and I-25. The view of downtown is gorgeous and uniquely different at all times of the day.” — Jonathan Stalls, founder, Walk2Connect

    S B R O A D WAY, D E N V E R | (   )    -     W W W.TI M O T H YJ S A L O N O N B R O A D WAY. CO

“The alley between Larimer and Walnut. 25th to around 28th. It’s amazing and can only be appreciated at walking speed. The Art is constantly changing, new and innovative, beautiful, varied and accessible to anyone who cares to take the time to take a walk. No price of admission.” — John Hayden, walking movement leader, Walk2Connect

“I love walking from the Golden Triangle neighborhood into downtown through Acoma Plaza, which passes between the Denver Art Museum and the Central Public Library and leads into Civic Center Park through the Greek amphitheater. This pedestrian-only route offers a fabulous array of art, architecture, and cityscape views, and is also always filled with people walking and lingering.” — Jill Locantore, policy and program director, Walk Denver “One of my favorite places is through Confluence Park. I take it twice a day. You see wildlife, and in the summer, kids are swimming in the river. The route takes me over Millennium Bridge, with people walking to and from work. It’s a great transition from home to work.” — Gosia Kung, executive director, Walk Denver

PHOTO CREDIT: RYAN MCGUIRE

“I love the Cherry Creek Trail for walking and biking.

It’s well maintained and such a beautiful place when the seasons are changing. You can follow it all the way up to Confluence and Commons Parks and meander across the river through the multiple trails there.” — Kayla Gilbert, program coordinator, Denver Department of Public Health

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 23

Kelly Lemieux

ADVENTURE TIME: THE GAY BAR CRAWL ON THE ZERO BUS

THE REGIONAL TRANSPORTATION District — RTD for short — has a number of infamous bus routes servicing the Denver metro area. One of the biggies is the Zero bus servicing Broadway/ South Broadway — almost as famous as Colfax’s #15 route — and you can plan an adventure on this north/south route with a monthly pass or a ten-pack of tickets.

If you plan a gay bar crawl adventure on the #0 line, you can start just north of the Denver Public Library’s main branch and head south on Broadway.

Have your ticket ready, ask for a transfer, and find a seat. The bus driver will do the work as you and your fellow riders check smartphones, talk with other passengers, and gaze out the windows at the passing restaurants, pot shops, and thrift stores that line Broadway.

We’ll be getting off in no time for our first stop, Broadway’s, the gay dive-bar between 11th and 12th. Remember your transfer ticket: It’s good for 2.5 hours.

After a beer or cocktail surrounded by big screen TVs (Broadway’s is a sports bar) and a large outdoor patio, head back outside, walk north to Arby’s, and park your caboose on the bus-stop bench and wait for the next Zero bus. Read on your tablet, contemplate the attractive guy at the bar, and get yourself ready for the next chapter in your adventure.

Next stop: The Compound. The Compound is annoyingly inbetween bus stops but if you’re willing to hoof it for a block or two, the Zero bus will get you within range. This dive-bar has been around since the 90s and is a perfect place to grab a pitcher of suds and chill out with the

24 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

friendly bartenders. Take ten minutes, take an hour, but we do need to catch the Zero bus again to make our way to our third stop: Lil’ Devils. Hopefully our transfer hasn’t expired and the line to board the bus isn’t too long. Either way, pee before you leave The Compound.

Lil’ Devils, near the intersection of South Broadway & Alameda, is relatively new and features one of the best patios in town.

A number of gay establishments have occupied the site where Lil’ Devils resides and the club is one of the last gay watering holes on the South Broadway corridor as you head out of Denver — but it’s not the very last. We’ll reboard the Zero bus after a drink at Lil’ Devils (check out men, clothes, and hairstyles while waiting at the bus stop) and head down Broadway to our final gay bar crawl destination: The Crown Social.

By this point, the Zero bus has taken us into the heart of Antique Row and the Crown Social is rumored to have a selection of antiques to match the patios and the live music — perfect browsing time (or buying time) with a beer, wine, or a mixed drink.

As happens with bar crawls, we’re pleasantly buzzed and perhaps make a final stop at the restrooms. Now check for your wallet, keys, and return ticket and head out.

Park your caboose at the bus stop and wait for the next #0.

It’s time to head back into town on RTD’s finest and to bring our gay bar crawl/bus adventure to a close. Thank you, Regional Transportation District, and your mighty vehicles that get us to and from our destinations.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 25

Yvonne Wright

DENVER TRAFFIC: GROWING AND SHOWING HOW CAN WE FIX IT? PERHAPS WE SHOULD LOOK TO UTAH.

FORT COLLINS

GREELEY

A 1¢ GAS TAX INCREASE WOULD RAISE $293 MILLION OVER A DECADE FOR COLORADO ROADS.

BOULDER

AURORA BRECKENRIDGE

CENTENNIAL

ASPEN

DENVER IS THE NATION’S FASTEST GROWING CITY.

BIKING TO WORK IS THE FASTEST GROWING COMMUTING STYLE.

(IT ROSE 60.8 PERCENT IN 2012 CENSUS.)

26 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

SALIDA

WITH BEAUTIFUL MOUNTAINS, OUTDOOR activities, and growing economies, it’s no wonder Rocky Mountain communities are booming. Growing populations mean growing commuter times — unless you live in Salt Lake City. While GPS maker TomTom Navigation shows Denver now ranks among the top 25 worst commute times in the country, SLC commutes have stayed roughly the same over the past nine years. Not only has Utah prepared for past transportation growth, the state is setting trends in preparing for more. This has many cities looking to the Beehive State for lessons.

COMPREHENSIVE PLANNING This year, Utah begins implementing its 2040 Unified Transportation Plan.

Lawmakers approved it last year and it includes everything from studying traffic patterns to providing additional sidewalks. The goal is for local communities to work together, instead of competing for funding.

COLORADO VEHICLE REGISTRATIONS (NEW + USED) ROSE 11 PERCENT IN 2014.

The plan looks to the future by looking to the past. Millions of people flocked to Utah for the 2002 Olympics, forcing the state to examine traffic in new and innovative ways. Highways needed to be built, improved, widened, and even increased. This meant years of heavy construction leading up to the games. The state had to find funding while trying to appease local drivers.

By the time it was over, the state’s major highway was expanded, several roads were added, and two light-rail lines were built with seven more rail lines to come.

“We were excited for the Olympics; we were welcoming the entire world. And the bonus? After they were gone, we had better roads,” says Warren Holz, one of the many commuters stuck in construction traffic day after day. “At one point,” he says, “we called I-15 the death luge because there was no place to pull over.” Why the collective patience? Utah used part of its budget on campaigns to convince commuters the delays were worth the rewards.

FINDING FUNDING As Colorado learned, it’s not enough to just plan. Several major transportation projects here came to a standstill when funding ran out. Utah, on the other hand, is providing funding as it plans. Before the Olympics, a sales-tax referendum helped pave the way. The new plan calls for a .05¢-per-gallon gas tax, something that is unlikely to happen here anytime soon. Our last gas tax hike was 25 years ago.

COLORADO RANKS 4TH IN NATION FOR POPULATION GROWTH. COLORADO’S POPULATION GROWTH IS DOUBLE THE NATIONAL AVERAGE (ACCORDING TO MOST RECENT CENSUS FIGURES).

The key, many say, was getting conservative lawmakers on board.

Traditionally opposed to tax increases, the conservative Speaker of Utah’s House became a champion for transportation advancement. Fellow Republicans followed suit. Many legislators in Utah realized people would rather spend more money in taxes than time stuck in traffic.

ALTERNATIVE TRANSPORTATION Neither Utah nor Colorado have lots of room to sprawl. Long-built neighborhoods and mountain ranges stand in the way of extra traffic lanes and additional roads and highways. Colorado’s Department of Transportation is looking at managed toll lanes and better car technology as two alternate ways to ease traffic, and both states are looking to extend bus and rail-line hours. Salt Lake’s Chamber of Commerce estimates their plan will increase ridership by nearly 90 percent within five years by increasing transit services 68 percent.

COLORADO’S INFRASTRUCTURE NEEDS ARE UNDERFUNDED

BY AN ESTIMATED $800 MILLION ANNUALLY.

DENVER RANKS

IN WORST COMMUTE TIMES NATIONWIDE.

The state is also banking on the biking boom. The most recent US Census figures show commuters who bike to work increased by 60 percent in 2012 alone. That’s the largest increase of any commuting style.

While Utah expects its population to double over the next 25 years, Colorado is looking at a nearly 90percent increase over the next 35. With population in both states booming, traffic congestion will only get worse if something isn’t done.

Sources: Colorado Department of Transportation, TomTom Navigation, US Census Bureau, Colorado Automobile Dealers Association, 2011 Independence Institute report, Forbes Magazine

AVERAGE DENVER RUSH HOUR COMMUTE TIME IS 27 MINUTES.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 27

Rachel Becher, Intern

A FROSTY NIGHT ABOARD THE FLATIRON FLYER

A collaboration between the Colorado Department of Transportation and RTD, the Flatiron Flyer travels an 18-mile route between Boulder and Denver, with exclusive non-stop access to each city through HOT lanes. About an hour trip from city to city, the Flatiron Flyer shaves 10–15 minutes off the commute of previous bus routes, and has been in operation since January 3rd of this year.

As I stepped onto the bus for the first time, a kind woman driving greeted me with a smile in the warm air. The fees to board the bus are fairly cheap: $4.50 one way and free for University students with access to an RTD College Pass. As I found a seat, the first thing that struck me was the smell. There are a multitude of negative smells associated with public travel. However, the Flyer 28 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

smelled fresh, emanating the modernity of the bus through “new car smell.” The seats were clean, and covered in soft upholstery. Passengers quietly looked down at their phones as I passed, their faces illuminated from the tiny screen, the bus windows reflecting their Facebook pages.

I take a seat as the Flyer starts to move.

The overhead lights turn off, and serene blue low-lights illuminate the aisles. It casts a dark and ethereal hue over the passenger’s faces, and as we merge onto the highway a second realization strikes me: silence. The engine calmly purrs along highway 36, and all that can be heard is the soothing, automated female voice announcing each stop along the route.

The Flatiron Flyer boasts a few new features that makes it a convenient way to travel. Every bus has overhead storage, and an outlet and USB port for charging electronic devices at each seat. In addition, each row has temperature control for when it’s too hot or cold. Each bus can carry up to eight bikes on the front, and they run on low-sulfur, clean diesel.

Glancing out the window, flashes of headlights whizz by in the blackness, and the Boulder darkness gives way to the glow of the Denver skyline. As a Colorado

native, this route was one very familiar, but traveling on a bus offers a vastly different experience. Without having to worry about driving, I was looking at the same road I had seen for years with new eyes. Restaurants, houses, office buildings I had never seen before, the development of the entire Metropolitan area. This place had once been plains, and now functions as a bustling urban expansion. The Flatiron Flyer participates in this modernity, and pushes us forward into our interconnected age.

I look overhead at the sign displaying the stops, and gingerly pull on the rope to request my exit. The bus rolls to a smooth stop, without the horrifying screech of brakes that I have come to know from most bus services. The overhead lights flash on, destroying the previous blue serenity, but signaling my time to re-enter the real world. As I return to the biting frost, it occurs to me that I had lost track of how long my trip even took. In the late-night glow of the blue interior, it slipped away from me through the comfort and serenity of my travels. The Denver city lights towered in dazzling enormity above me, and my frozen breath trailed behind as I briskly walked on.

PHOTO CREDIT: MATTHEW WIEBE

WISPS OF FROZEN BREATH LINGER UNDER the streetlights as approaching headlights grow brighter. The bitter Boulder air nips at my fingertips, and I thrust my hands into my pockets in a poor attempt to warm them. A twinge of anticipation flutters through my body as the wheels come to a steady stop. The yellow bird stands brightly against the blue Flatiron Flyer Bus, and the front doors open with a subtle whoosh.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 29

The “We’re Gonna Marry” Itinerary Stefanie Cochrane

HERE’S TO THE HAPPY COUPLE! YOU’VE FOUND each other in this crazy, mixed-up world of ours and there aren’t many things more beautiful than that. The love is there, now what do you do? Wedding planning can quickly become a storm of flatware, pushy relatives, chiffon, and cake tastings, but try not to forget that the real reason for this wedding season is to celebrate one another.

It takes a small village to plan a wedding, so the best defense against centerpiecerelated night terrors and Mylanta cocktails is to take it one step at a time. Here’s a quick rundown and checklist, just to make sure you don’t completely fudge one of the most important days of your life.

9 TO 12 MONTHS OUT Set your budget. This important step

makes sure the rest of your planning stays within your means while hopefully staving off any financial sucker-punches between you, sweet couple. If you’re going to share a life together, you might as well shine a realistic light on your finances. Find a number you’re both comfortable with and go from there. Make sure you know exactly how many crystal-encrusted, top- hatted swans you can afford. crew is your nearest and dearest. They’ll lend you their ears when you have to vent, their hands to help you run errands, and their booze to get you drunk when you need it the most. Treat ’em real nice and they’ll probably throw you one hell of a send-off.

Start a guest list.

With two worlds colliding, there’s bound to be a lot of people you want close on your big day.

However, keep your all-mighty budget in mind and try to be as discerning as possible. You might have to skip your excoworkers brother’s sister in law’s cousin.

Book your officiant. Be it priest, rabbi,

or city official, it’s important to find the right fit for you and your partner. Another option is to ask a close friend or family member to preside; quick and easy ordainments are now possible … because internet.

30 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

Photo Credit: Fairy Tale Photography + LetLovePhotography via GayWeddings.com

Choose your wedding party. This

KEYSTONE WEDDINGS athtaking Bre ALPINE SETTING

TAKE YOUR WEDDING TO NEW HEIGHTS

KEYSTONEWEDDINGS.COM

866.988.5570

#KEYSTONEMOMENTS Photo courtesy of Josie Pix. © 2016 Vail Summit Resorts, Inc. All rights reserved. Trademarks are the property of Vail Trademarks, Inc.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 31

Consider a wedding planner. Factor

in your budget, time, guest list, and sanity to determine if you’ll need a little outside help. Maybe 2001 J.Lo is still available ...

Pick a venue. If it’s your dream spot, then

do your best to make it happen! It’s most likely the biggest cost of this whole wedding business, but put that deposit down and imagine the storm of confetti that’s coming.

Research vendors

to get an idea of different options/pricing for foods, flowers, linens, chocolate lava rivers, the works. Consider thinking outside the box depending on what’s available. #foodtrucksaywhat

6 TO 9 MONTHS OUT Finalize the guest list once and for all. Once completed, the wedding-invite madness can begin.

Consider engagement photos. It’s

helpful to have a few sessions so you can feel comfortable in front of the camera and its operator. Remember, the photo you choose for the invitation will be hanging on fridges across the country.

Lock down your vendors. You’ll need

time to sift through all the chinaware and buttermilk frostings to get what you want.

Also, ask yourself one question: band or DJ?

Ceremony outfits. Dress, suit, Gandalf

cloak — whatever, as long as it reflects you.

As long as you feel beautiful, you will be!

Then plot shoes, hair, jewelry ...

Send save-the-dates, perhaps with those fabulous photos from the engagement shoot. Easy to do yourselves and as usual, check Pinterest for brainstorming ideas.

Create a wedding website. This is an incredibly helpful tool to keep things in order while giving your guests a resource to keep abreast of any and all things “your wedding.”

32 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

4 TO 6 MONTHS OUT Choose flowers. Did you know that the butterfly weed means “Leave me”? Yikes!

(Neither did we. Just sayin’.)

Plan the honeymoon, your wedding

day’s cooler older sister. This is your first of hopefully many great adventures — make it something to remember.

Select bridal party looks. Look, ladies,

there’s one of two ways to go here. Either you drown your friends in swaths of taffeta and pastels — may we suggest a flammable fabric? They’ll be burned later anyways — or give them the chance to get a dress that’s practical and flattering. You’ll still be the star, don’t worry that pretty little head of yours.

Book a rehearsal dinner locale.

This is an important night to get everyone together and on the same page. Tender moments and mussels go hand in hand.

Book your room for the wedding night. Unconditional love and crazy sex abound! You’re married now so you get to try that thing, right?

Send out invites and set up that RSVP

function on your wedding site. Done and done.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 33

1 TO 3 MONTHS OUT

(Eek!)

Get that marriage license. You and

your partner will both need to provide birth certificates, proof of citizenship/ residency, and some form of photo ID. There may also be some fees, so be sure to have some green on you. Note: Many offices only accept cash.

The soundtrack to your married life — the music. You’ll dance your first

dance to a song that’ll make your knees go weak for the rest of your lives. Might we suggest anything by Otis Redding, Sade, or Peaches, if you want to go that route.

Plan some incentives for your bridal party. Do something special together to

share some love and laughs before the big day. Manicures, dinner, beach trip, you could rent out a ROLLER RINK! Seriously, why don’t people do that anymore?

Plan the day of the ceremony. Who

THE DAY

(AHHHHH!)

Take time for yourself.

Relax, eat breakfast, take a bath. Note: You’re not “supposed” to drink champagne with your muscle relaxer, but we didn’t see anything ...

“Punch me and jail me, stamp me and mail me, just get me to the church on time.” – Alfred P. Doolittle.

The kiss! Tongue, no tongue, your choice.

You did it! Now go enjoy your marriage

before the senseless bickering and sweatpants set in. Congratulations on your amazing day and we at OUT FRONT wish nothing but the best for all you lovers out there.

34 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

Photo Credit: Fairy Tale Photography + LetLovePhotography via GayWeddings.com

goes where when? Sit down and work it out so everything runs smoothly … or not — at least you’ll have a schedule in place.

IT’S HARD TO KEEP A SECRET THIS GOOD.

VISIT OUR SHOWROOM

TODAY AND RECEIVE

This 4 light mini chandelier from the Rumer collection by Kichler Lighting delivers a big vintage inspired impact. Vintage Edison bulbs complete the look while the minimal design offers just the right amount of intrigue.

COLORADO’S LARGEST LIGHTING SHOWROOM 20,000+ SQ. FT OF DISTINCTIVE LIGHTING FOR ANY LIFESTYLE

% 30 off *

M-F 8-6, SAT 9-6, SUN 11-5 *Sale does not include already discounted merchandise. 30% off sale does not include ceiling fans. Shop & compare our everyday low prices on ceiling fans!

URBANLIGHTSDENVER.COM | 1393 SOUTH SANTA FE DR, DENVER | 303.989.8895 OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 35

Guide to Throwing a Rad Bachelor(ette) Party Amanda Moutinho

THE BACHELOR(ETTE) PARTY IS, theoretically, the last night the bride/ groom can really let loose. It’s customary for friends to throw the party, and to have a truly epic night, you have to plan. Here are some tips to get you started.

DO ask the bachelor(ette) what they want.

While some people’s worst nightmare is a bachelor(ette) craft party or all-night video games, remember: This party is about the bride/groom. Consider their interests and really think about what will make them happy.

That being said, DO a little pushing. This is the one night in your lives designated to be scandalous and naughty. Brides/grooms get caught up in weddings stress and may want a low-key party. But sometimes, they need just a little nudge over the line. It’s about getting them out of their comfort zone and making them blush.

But, DON’T shove them over the line. If the hard limit is no strippers, don’t hire the whole Chippendales brigade. You want the bride/groom to have fun, not be mortified.

For the love of the wedding gods, DON’T have the party the night before the wedding. Give yourself some breathing room to let loose. No one wants to look hungover in their wedding pictures.

Plus, movies like Bachelorette and The Hangover have taught us that you might need some wiggle room to solve problems created by the party.

DO get a little cheesy. While there’s a ton of ways to throw a lame party, it can be fun to be a bit corny. Consider playing some dirty games, coordinating outfits, truth or dare, a risqué scavenger hunt, or naughty gift bags filled with genital-shaped candy, shooters, cigars, and condoms.

DON’T do anything you’ll regret in the morning. Sure you’re kissing singlehood goodbye, but you don’t want to kiss your fiancé goodbye too. Remember to look, not touch. And stay away from any daredevil stunts. Full-body casts don’t photograph well.

36 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

THE SESSION AWAKES One Colorado: The Session Awakes was held at the Avenue Grill on January 19th.

Our good buddies at One Colorado hosted the happy hour to give the community a chance to meet with pro-equality legislators and learn more about what might happen in 2016. If you haven’t already read their letter to OUT FRONT readers, flip to the front of the mag!

Photos by Charles Broshous

MARQUEE THE ADDAMS FAMILY A NEW MUSICAL COMEDY Now through February 27, 2016 5501 Arapahoe Ave. • BDTStage.com

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 37

WHAT TO DO: Bachelor(ette) parties can be flexible to fit each bride/groom. Skip Las Vegas, and get creative to find the best option for your party. While there a plethora of bars and clubs to choose from in Colorado, here are some alternate activities you can try instead of or before hitting the dance floor. Don’t forget to mention it’s for a bachelor(ette) party; they might throw you some deals.

Get outside: Colorado is full of plenty of activities for the outdoorsy bride/groom.

Hit the slopes for a snow bunny weekend or, when the weather improves, go for a scandalous camping weekend.

Go to the source: If bars aren’t your

scene, head to a brewery tour or a wine tasting. See how your alcohol is made and get drunk in the process.

Take a class: It’s never a bad time to

learn something new. You can find a private class in everything from trapeze to cooking to martial arts. You can even develop a new skill for your honeymoon like striptease or pole dancing.

Boudoir photo shoot: Get dolled up and dressed down. Embrace your sexy side and take some saucy pictures for your significant other to enjoy before or after the wedding.

38 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

PHOTO PEGGY DYER

Spectacular Views Vie of the Mountains and Denver City Lights

WEDDINGS • CELEBRATIONS • MEETINGS

Golden Foothills, I-70/Genesee exit • 303-526-3105 www.MountVernonCC.com 25 MINUTES FROM DOWNTOWN DENVER

Love is in bloom Start your new life together at the Gardens.

Two locations, indoor and outdoor sites, and awardwinning catering all tailored for an intimate affair, a lavish event and anything in between.

BOOK TODAY! Denver 720-865-3551

Chatfield Farms 720-865-4339

www.botanicgardens.org OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 39

Til Death Do Us Part?

Hardly A NEW PROCESS TURNS THE ASHES OF CREMATED LOVED ONES INTO DIAMONDS

Berlin Sylvestre

WITH THIS RING, I THEE WED. WITH THIS other ring, I commemorate the life we lived together. Ashes to ashes, dust to diamonds.

‘Algordanza’ means remembrance in Romansh, a language spoken in the Swiss alps — specifically by the owner of the likenamed company that turns the ashes of your cremated loved ones into diamonds.

The ashes produced from an average-sized human is usually around 5.5 pounds. From that, somewhere around 0.2 grams of carbon is extracted. For between $5,000 – $20,000, that carbon can be compressed into a diamond and sent to the grieving family.

The finished product can be placed into jewelry, such as a ring or a necklace, and is delivered in a beautiful polished wooden box. Inside the box is a pyramid-shaped stand on which the jewelry rests on display.

“It’s a very emotional moment when you are returning a family member,” Rinaldo Willy told The Atlantic last year. “The diamonds always bring back beautiful memories. If there are tears, they are tears of happiness.”

Perhaps most peculiar is the fact that the diamonds take on a color all their own. The hue of the finished product is determined by elements present in the deceased’s ashes. For example, false teeth, metal bone and joint replacements, even chemotherapy can affect the final color of the diamond. If the ashes contained excess amounts of nitrogen, the diamond will be yellow; a blue diamond is a result of a significant amount of boron, while an excess of boron yields a black diamond.

In order to visit a loved one’s final resting place, one usually has to head to the cemetery which may or may not even be in the same town (or state) as the mourning. Other times, paying respects means eyeballing an urn on the mantle here and there and perhaps sharing a word of grievance. The process of turning a loved one’s remains into a diamond takes the somber association of cemetery dirt and sooty ash and gives it a more positive association. Algordanza.ch

40 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

BLOW PONY Blow Pony, a monthly queer party that originated in Portland, made its debut in Denver on January 22nd at the Compound.

Blow Pony featured music, dancing, performances, and plenty of beautiful people. The only requirement to attend is to be 100 percent accepting of everyone. The event featured Will Sheridan and DJs Airick X, the Bitch Prince, and Christopher Diesel.

Photos by Charles Broshous

EARN YOUR BODY. Join today and your first month is FREE. *Join between Feb 3-17th.

Are you one of the millions of Americans

– men and women –

with hair loss or thinning hair?

The good news is, with Cindy’s effective hair loss remedy, you don’t have to!

303-698-0607 | NaturalDesignsInc.com OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 41

MARKETPLACE

FOR INFO. ON PLACING A MARKETPLACE AD [ ACCOUNTING ]

303-477-4000

MARKETING@OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

[ COUNSELING ]

[ INSURANCE ]

Individual and Couples Counseling

LGBTQ Issues, Gender, Sexuality, Anxiety, Depression, Grief & Loss, Substance Use

www.BenjaminAiken.com | 303-332-7850 Conveniently located in Golden Triangle with free parking [ BATH + BEAUTY ]

[ JEWELRY ]

[ LEGAL ]

[ INSURANCE ]

[ LEGAL ]

THERE’S NOTHING “DIRTY” ABOUT IT

$2 0

Bir thday o r Bathing Suit

bath entry

MA SSAGE $35+ BODY SCRUB $10+ CAFÉ

(303) 825-2995 • 3540 W COLFAX AVE. • DENVER [ CHIROPRACTIC ]

42 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

SMALL BUSINESS PACKAGE • MARKETPLACE AD in each issue; 24 ads per year • WEB AD for one year • ONE MILLION IMPRESSIONS

For more information, contact us: 303-477-4000 or email marketing@outfrontonline.com [ MASSAGE ]

[ MASSAGE ]

[ REAL ESTATE ]

[ MASSAGE ]

[ MEDIA & MARKETING ]

[ RENTAL ]

INDIVIDUALIZED MASSAGE Michael Conti, BSPsy, LMT An integrative approach to wellness

$65/hour $80/90 minutes 13th and Marion 303-832-1499 individualizedmassagedenver.com [ MASSAGE ]

[ REAL ESTATE ]

RICH PLASMEIER W H AT A T I M E T O B E B U Y I N G

303-931-4155

REALRICH6@AOL.COM

PARK GROVE 1280 LAFAYETTE STREET Large 1 bedroom units, $1000-$1300 Large 2 bedroom units, $1200-$1500 Balconies, dishwashers, parking garage, indoor pool, sauna, exercise room, and views!

303-830-1344 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• CHEESMAN PARK 1360 WILLIAMS STREET 1 bedroom units from $900 Rooftop deck, fireplaces, dishwashers.

303-830-1344 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• WASHINGTON PARK 960 S. LOGAN STREET 1 bedroom units from $875 2 bedroom units from $1200 720-205-0990 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• WASHINGTON PARK 10 S. PENNSYLVANIA ST. 1 bedroom units from $900 Rooftop deck, fireplaces, dishwashers.

720-205-0990 ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• GOVERNOR’S PARK 899 WASHINGTON ST. 1 bedroom units from $900 Fireplaces, rooftop deck, dishwashers, fabulous remodel!

303-668-5014 Clean, Renovated and Friendly!

Managed by Lloyd’s Apartments L.P. OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 43

BAR TAB AQUA LOU NG E

CRAVE

1417 Krameria, Denver (720) 287-0584

1891 14 th St #110, Denver (303) 586-4199 cravedenver.com

475 Santa Fe, Denver (303) 778-0545

BA RR ICU DA'S 1076 Ogden St., Denver (303) 860-8353 barricudasdenver.com

B LUSH & BLU 1526 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 484-8548 blushblubar.com

B OYZTOWN

THE CROWN SOCIAL 1446 S. Broadway, Denver (720) 353-4701 crownsocialdenver.com

COMPOUND BAS IX 145 Broadway, Denver (303) 722-7977 compounddenver.com

DENVER EAGLE

M UPTOWN

B ROA DWAYS

MANIC MONDAYS Happy Hour from open to close.

Karaoke @ 9pm with Allison

HAPPY HOUR TIL 8PM $2 domestic drafts, $2.50 wells, $3 domestic mini pitchers SUNDAY DJ TONY All Day $1 Coors Light Draft MONDAY LEATHER & TATTOO $1 Coors Light, $3 Svedka 8pm–CL TUESDAY 2-for-1 wells/domestic drafts 8pm–CL WEDNESDAY All Day Happy Hour ABSOLUT THIRSTY THURS W/ DJ MIA $3 Absolut, $5 Fireball & Jack Fire, $6 Malibu Buckets 8pm–close FRIDAY DJ TONY 10–11pm & Midnight–1am $2 wells, $3 domestic mini pitchers SATURDAY DJ TONY All Day $3 Svedkas

C HA R LIE'S ®

BR

BL

TRACKS

H

L

K

AH AP

AV E

OE

.W

.

ST

ES

T

WRANGLER 17TH AVE. HAMBURGER MARYS XBAR CHARLIE’S BLUSH & BLU

BROADWAYS

11TH AVE. VINYL

X BAR

LI’L DEVILS

1ST AVE.

ALAMEDA AVE. ARKANSAS AVE.

COLORADO BLVD.

COMPOUND BOYZTOWN

OGDEN ST.

BARKER LOUNGE

COLFAX AVE. AQUA LOUNGE

R&R

BARRICUDA’S CLARKSON ST.

8TH AVE. 6TH AVE.

ELM ST.

AL

COLFAX AVE.

PA R

.

ST

T

YORK ST.

CRAVE

ST .M

1700 Logan St., Denver (303) 837-1075 denverwrangler.com

629 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 832-2687 xbardenver.com

NU

KRAMERIA ST.

16 T

ELEVATED SATURDAYS 2-for-1 drinks 9–10pm No cover before 10pm

W RANGLER

AL

COLORADO BLVD.

LANNIE’S

TRACKS

T. ES

AR

SUPERSTAR THURSDAYS 18+ dance party Cover: 18–20 $10, 21+ $5 after 10pm

DRAG NATION LAST FRIDAYS The nation’s best drag show with the hottest celebrity drag queens!

H

AK

W

3500 Walnut St., Denver (303) 863-7326 tracksdenver.com

BABES AROUND DENVER FIRST FRIDAYS Largest monthly women’s party in the US! Doors open at 6pm. 21+

IG

.

VD BL EAGLE

WASHINGTON ST.

44 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

255 South Broadway, Denver (303) 733-1156 lildevilslounge.com

N TO

BROADWAY

3430 N. Academy Blvd., Colo. Springs (719) 570-1429 clubqonline.com

LIL’ DEVILS

.

C LUB Q

(FOR M ERLY HA M BURGER M ARY’S)

16th St. Mall @ Arapahoe (303) 293-0075 lannies.com

VD BL

SUNDAYS Svedka & well liquor bust from 4–8pm Drag Divas at 9pm: $5 big pitchers

(303) 832-1333 M-UPTOWN.COM 700 E. 17 TH AVE. DENVER

R

SATURDAYS $3 Svedka (all flavors) 9pm–CL

LANNIE’S CLOCKTOWER CA BAR E T

EE

FRIDAYS $3 Absolut 9pm–CL

WEDNESDAYS: DOLLS WITH BALLS BINGO Hosted by Alexandra Winters & Harley Quinn. Free! Starts at 9pm.

SANTA FE DR. KALAMATH ST.

THURSDAYS 2-4-1 drinks 7pm–CL

TUESDAYS: OUTRAGEOUS DRAG BINGO Hosted by Sasha Andrews & Jackie Summers. Balls drop at 9pm. Free to play!

DO IT WITH A LOC AL

SP

DAILY SPECIALS All Day $3 domestic mini-pitchers (32oz.)

11am–7pm: $3 wells, $3 domestics, and $4 u-calls. 8–10pm: $5 PB&J drink & shot special

700 E. 17 th Ave., Denver (303) 832-1333

BROADWAY

900 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 839-8890 charliesdenver.com

broadwaysdenver.com 1027 Broadway | Denver, CO

1475 36 th St., Denver (303) 291-0250 theeaglebar.com

117 Broadway, Denver (303) 722-7373 boyztowndenver.com

1027 Broadway, Denver (303) 623-0700 broadwaysdenver.com

$75.00 SVEDKA BOTTLE SERVICE

DOWNING ST.

BA RK ER LOU NG E

THE HOTTEST DENVER NIGHTLIFE

LE

ET

SD

AL

E

DR

ALAMEDA AVE.

.

EL POTRERO

BLACK CROWN

ASPEN GAY SKI WEEK As part of the Aspen Gay Ski Week’s 2016 festivities, Ginger Minj hosted the Downhill Costume Contest including judges Ivy Winters and Alyssa Edwards. With a grand prize of $1000, the adventure was held at Gondola Plaza on January 22.

Photos by Dustin Krier

MY TRAINER MAKES ME HARD. THE BIRTHDAY SUIT TAILOR. YOUR NEW PERSONAL TRAINER. GREG DYER, CPT The Birthday Suit Tailor 303.881.5016 | BirthdaySuitTailor.com OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 45

H EA LT H

Kelsey Lindsey GOING COMMANDO IS SEXY. IT’S RISKY. IT’S NAUGHTY. THESE ARE all common statements we’ve heard, but let me add one of my own: Going commando is f*cking comfy.

But the freeing feeling (not to mention the naughty rush you may get) experienced while commando is one you never need to be ashamed of.

Most commonly known as a tool to turn you on and get the sexytime going, the main benefit of going commando (No wedgies!

No underwear lines!) has been clouded by the erotic meaning tagged to it. Not that that’s a bad thing. But people should, people need to know: going commando is ok. Besides being super comfortable for both men and women, it doesn’t pose any major medical risk, as long as you are mindful while doing so.

Now for men, it gets a little bit trickier. Given their added situation down there, men are more likely to feel irritation and get a little more tangled up if they choose to let the boys free.

Going commando for men is fun, but make sure you take the necessary precautions before you skip the briefs (or boxers).

While some may think that wearing no panties would lead to a smoldering pit of bacteria down there for women, that’s not accurate. Talking to The Village Voice, Dr. Gillian Dean, the associate medical director of clinical research and training at Planned Parenthood New York, said there is no scientific research suggesting that going commando leads to infections like bacterial vaginosis or yeast infections. In fact, some gynecologists suggest going commando if you’re experiencing itches or irritation down in your lady parts. There are still some risks — going commando during your period may make you more susceptible to infections, for example.

46 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

First, if your junk is known to get a little sweaty or it’s warm and humid out, consider only going commando while wearing pants made of breathable fabrics. A good sprinkle of Gold Bond will also help clear up some moisture in that area. Second, in addition to breathable fabrics during particularly muddy times, be cautious of any scratchy jeans or pants — a rash down there is one sure way to spoil any evening plans and add a ton of unnecessary discomfort during the day. Lastly, consider what activities you’ll be participating in while going commando.

Downward dog or an intense ultimate Frisbee game might lead to some bent-up junk or uncomfortable rubbing.

Most importantly, relax, take a deep breath, and enjoy.

PHOTO CREDIT: NIT UNDERWEAR

UNDERWEAR IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT

Going commando for men is fun, but make sure you take the necessary precautions before you skip the briefs (or boxers).

A P RI L 2N D 2016 @ 8 P M OUTFRONTONLINE.COM/ANNIVERSARYPROM

SAVE THE DATE

9AM-5PM: $10 LOCKER SPECIAL 8 HR LIMIT CHECK OUT NEW WEB PAGE, NEW PRICE SPECIALS AND EVENTS.

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 47

O U T BAC K CLASSIFIEDS Envisioned by Boberto

Need help?

If you believe you’re a victim of a sex or hate crime, contact the Colorado AntiViolence Program at 303-852-5094

Advertise Here

303-477-4000

DO IT WITH A LOC AL (303) 832-1333 M-UPTOWN.COM 700 E. 17 TH AVE. DENVER

(FOR M ERLY HA M BURGER M ARY’S)

48 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

OUTFRONTONLINE.COM 49

H EA LT H

COMBAT THE CRACK: A GUIDE TO COLDWEATHER GROOMING

TOM’S OF MAINE ORGANIC MOISTURIZING LIP BALM Sunflower, soybean, and organic peppermint keep your lips lush and smooth — without the addition of harmful parabens, phthalates, or phenoxyethanol — so you’re confident to pucker up whenever the occasion calls. Like another ‘Snowmageddon.’ $3

KEEP WINTER’S DRYING EFFECTS AT BAY WITH THESE MOISTURE-PACKED PICK-ME-UPS

Mikey Rox WHILE YOU CAN’T AVOID WINTER’S SKIN-DAMAGING EFFECTS altogether, you can fortify your grooming routine with a vitamin-, mineral-, and moisture-enriched regimen that keeps your skin supple and soft despite the elements for that summertime silkiness even when it’s snowing out.

Here are five new products to add to your arctic arsenal.

ERACLEA DAILY BAMBOO EXFOLIANT For a face “as smooth as a baby’s tush,” as one reviewer put it, use this exfoliating micro-scrub every couple days (it says daily on the packaging, but you can chill a bit on the microscrub when the mercury is low) to remove impurities, oil, and dead skin cells for a youthful glow that’ll look even more radiant when basked in the light of a ski-lodge fire. $42 50 FEBRUARY 03, 2016

MOISTUREWORX SKIN PROTECTION SPRAY Patented Novasome delivery technology allows this light, headto-toe, skin-protecting moisturizer to provide the benefits of white petrolatum without the residue of a pore-clogging slick. $37

PACIFIC SHAVING COMPANY CAFFEINATED SHAVING CREAM & AFTER SHAVE Hopped-up shave cream and aftershave from Pacific Shaving Company not only promotes healthy skin (caffeine is an effective antioxidant, dontcha know) and reduces redness, but the buzz you’ll get can help you cut back on your morning joe-on-the-go. $8 SOTHYS HOMME ENERGIZING FACE CLEANSER Save precious time in the morning with this three-in-one energizing facial cleanser — it washes, scrubs, and works as a mask (when left on for five to 10 minutes) — which features key ingredients like volcanic rock to stimulate skin cells and rhyolite grains for microdermabrasion. $34

The more it snows, the smarter you feel.

A smart new way to take on winter. The 2016 Subaru Impreza.® Symmetrical All-Wheel Drive with 36 mpg* cuts through the snow. As a 2015 IIHS Top Safety Pick, it gives you peace of mind when winter’s storms are at your door. Love. It’s what makes a Subaru, a Subaru.

Subaru and Impreza are registered trademarks. *EPA-estimated hwy fuel economy for 2016 Subaru Impreza CVT Sport models. Actual mileage may vary.

Proudly Serving our Entire Community 800-789-5583 • bestbuysubaru.com 1080 Motor City Dr • Colorado Springs, CO 80905 Courtesy Delivery Available to Anywhere in Colorado